#I dont speak spanish

[mothmags]

minecraft men

[sophiejanefostersilver]

Im not ok

[tigraira]

I recently was told to watch Unicorn Wars which is a Spanish film about teddy bears and Sargento Caricias / Drill Sergeant Ironstrokes is the character my brain decided to latch onto. Guess I have another character to obsess about for a while. As with everything I watch I have some dumb headcanons and even dumber ideas. Also I grew up with family who spoke mainly spanish but never learned how to fully speak it myself due to some family issues so it was really fun to watch a movie that I could somewhat kinda understand.

Also I will forever refer to this character as Sargento/ Sergeant Caricias as it is weird to translate names of characters

Headcanons/ ideas under the cut, I apologize for grammar and spelling errors I am making this at like 2:30 in the morning. I may edit later, probably not though

Slight TW for death and emotional issues

Headcanons

Is around 35-45 years old

Slightly chubby but still has muscle

Great marksman and has decent skills in hand-to-hand combat

Met Padre early in his career and has a weird relationship with him

Big anxiety but does not have the skills to deal with it in a healthy way

Really bad with expressing his emotions other than anger and gets extremely frustrated when trying

Took up smoking a few months after joining the army which Padre continues to chastise him about

Has a couple of scars from previous missions but was never injured enough to retire in his opinion

Snores really loud when at home or at base camp but is a scarily quiet sleeper when on a mission

Frequent sufferer of night terrors when at base camp and refuses to sleep with his back facing the door

Good at taking instructions from a superior but awful at giving orders

Ideas

Grew up with a loving mother and a emotionally distant dad

His dad was also in the army in his youth and was a successful Sergeant

Both of his parents were religious but he always found the sermons to be boring and the clothes itchy

He looked up to his dad and wanted to be just like him and would practice his marching in his front yard and would cover his face with mud pretending it was camo paint when he was young

His mother would make fake unicorns for Caricias to shoot blunt arrows into and would always show his dad his marksmanship skills when his dad would have time to come home

His mother died of an unknown disease when he was 10

The last time he openly cried Infront of someone was during the funeral

From watching his dad, he got the idea that men do not cry and are not emotional. His father did not shed a tear during the entire event, nor did Caricias ever see his dad cry at home

His dad became more angry once they returned home, both towards him and the neighbors who his dad previously had a good relationship with

This led to Caricias having issues processing and expressing his emotions in a healthy way. Anger would be his go to emotion and would rather yell than try to work through any other emotion

One of the priests at the church came up to Caricias a few weeks after the funeral and tried to connect with the tween. The priest told him that his mother was with god as Caricias loved his mother so much, so god wanted to protect his mother from this realm

Caricias took this as though the priest was blaming him for his mom's death and ended up with Caricias yelling at the priest

After that he never willingly stepped foot inside or participated in any sermon or event inside a church

He joined the army as soon as he was old enough to and tried to rise up through the ranks as his dad did

When Caricias arrived at his squadron he was approached by the church father who was assigned to the group

This led to a shaky but somewhat friendly relationship between him and Padre

He had great skill with the bow and was considered to be a great soldier who could follow instructions well

Caricias would frequently write to his dad during this time and received letters full of praise about his achievements

When he reached the rank of sergeant, he received a engraved flask from his dad alongside a letter that contained words of praise and encouragement from his father

Despite his quick growth, he ended up failing to guide his troops to kill enough unicorns to impress the generals on several occasions and ended up being injured several times when it could have been avoided with better planning

Padre would frequently try to give words of encouragement to Caricias but would be brushed off as soon as Padre tried to add some religious elements to their conversations

When he failed being promoted the third time he stopped telling his dad about how his missions went and focused on his hopes for the future and memories of his mom

His last letter he sent to his dad spoke about Padre, his hope that he would be promoted after this next mission, his mom, and his faith in his new recruits, especially the blonde one named Coco

[doyouknowjuno]

qsmp brainrot

havent been on tumblr in a while. is there any qsmp ppl on here. its all i think abt every waking hour. even more than that. ive had dreams abt qsmp. pls someone. anyone

[soulless-bex]

i always get so fucking confused when someone comments on my fics in a language that isn’t english. like, did you get lost or…?

[ionamalachite]

i was listening to my dad's spanish duo lingo lesson and i caught "potato fries"

[fernandoaloneso]

Hamilton didn't get me on the track, just in the box. Fernando being the menace i love

[paintedcrows]

"Bill... Can I call you that?" / "You can call me whatever you want except 'My Love'!"

"Ha ha! That's a joke! Everybody loves me!"

Y yo a ti Ford, or whatever. @fearoftriangles pointed out that in the Spanish version of The Book of Bill: Bill says Ford can call him anything but "Mi Amor" instead of anything but "Late for Dinner" and-

...I swear, Spanish translators cannot keep getting away with this

[westleywithatea]

this is a bye-lingual spanish joke XD i love it

De quien sera? 🤨

[ratatatastic]

maffhew who refuses to say runebergin torttu because he knows hes gonna butcher it so bad he might be kicked out of the country the second he tries and staunchly avoids that by going "the one dessert that barky is going to have to explain 😃"

sasha who gets faced with the most generic description of everything hes ever eaten in his life so far because of maffhew and going "???... oh you mean runebergin torttu!"

"he did good he liked the food and he likes the finland so far so its good" sasha says with so much pride now that all the anxiety has left his system that his husband teammate is enjoying his country and doesnt hate it

media availability | 10.29.24 (x)(x)

the smile of a man who knowlingly doomed his husband and said husband using all his brain power to context clues his way to whatever the fuck he just got asked that his brain is running hotter than a mid 2012 macbook air thats somehow still alive in the year of the lord 2024 but girl does she chug along shes louder than a fighter jet

[sistertonin]

stephanie vaquer & damian priest

[clownmitts]

Tomorrow is the big day, here's a bunch of unfinished, really cheesy joanfk (+ ponce)

[skitskatdacat63]

Every time I read Fernando cursing in fic, I can only think about this clip and then my brain short-circuits

[voiceemporium]

Lucanis Dellamorte in Dragon Age Veilguard voiced by Zach Mendez

[ayngellica]

Here me out; Royalty au where Roier and Jaiden have to get an arranged marriage bc politics but are literally just besties who r only doing this for public image

And as for guapoduo, consider, Cellbit being an absolute maniac on the battlefield as a young teenage knight, went to jail over just how bad it was. Around 10-15 years later, he gets a message from the royal fucking palace that he is needed to act as a war general/personal guard/whatever role due to rising tensions, cue lots of cellbit and roier (Prince x guard moment)

I like to think that Roier liked to train with the knights as a kid despite being a prince, he probably would have been one himself if not born into that role, hence the amount of time he spends sparring with Cellbit, making sure he's up to standard (definitely the only reason..)

[adeleine-everyday]

day 102

no sabo kid