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deepestnightcolor · 2 days ago

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✩⁺₊✩☽⋆Kinkmas - 24th of December⋆☾✩⁺₊✩

ᴀ/ɴ: This is it, folks! The last door to open for you in this event. Thank you for sticking around or checking out a story here and there, I appreciate it all! If you celebrate Christmas - merry Christmas! Have some lovely and calm festivities! If you don't - have a lovely day, I hope it is relaxing enough and that you take good care of yourself!

A gentle reminder: when I write "Christmas" here, I am talking about the Feast of The Winterstar. I have to admit, I got a little sloppy after writing "Feast of the winterstar" so often. Please forgive me - and I hope you can enjoy nonetheless!

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: find out, dolls!

ᴡᴄ: depending how much you read

ᴍᴅɴɪ ✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: hints of sexual content

Sebastian: „The Feast of the Winterstar isn’t really my thing, you know? So many people, so many sounds, and you have to pretend to be…I dunno, a happy a little family, you know? Even though you aren’t really a happy little family, and you feel like an outcast. Look at this, me throwing a pity party for myself. But I promise, it’s going somewhere. I didn’t usually like it because I felt so misplaced, but this year, I didn’t. This was one of the first years where I looked forward to going, because I knew you would be my family, and I dunno, it felt so good. Okay, I have to admit, maybe that blowjob you gave me before helped. And maybe knowing that you were so full of my cum that you had to squish those thighs together in that little skirt did, too. I wonder how many people saw those hickeys, wonder how many knew you were absolutely pumped full…you took my cock so well, even though you knew we had to go, like you always do…I digress. Look at me, writing this card, trying to be all cute and sweet and even now when you are not even around (you are sleeping on the couch right now, I am going to carry you to bed later, promise) to distract me, you still possess my mind. I sometimes wonder if you know how much I love you. Probably not, because I often suck telling you, but I do. So much. You make this life a lot better, you know? You give me this sort of foundation I have always needed, and you know what? I am so happy to build up on it with you. The realization hit me hard today, when I didn’t feel that pit in my stomach when getting ready to go to the town square. When I didn’t just want to turn around and run for it, when I didn’t want to jump on my bike and just get out of there. It hit me even harder when I looked forward to talking to my family, because I could wrap my arm around you, and I knew I would be safe and appreciated. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but, uh, thank you. I love you, you little toad. I will put this card under your pillow now and pretend it was Santa who brought you your gift, because you can’t stop me. I love you. -Sebby”

Sam: “I haven’t written a card in aaaaaaaaaaaaagessssssssss, but I decided today was the day it needed to happen. Because I love you, baby, so, so much. You should have seen yourself in the square, holy fuck did you make my heart swell. That Winterstar sweater looked sooooo good on you, and the way your eyes glistened? Holy shit, you were prettier than the tree they put up, and I love that tree. But you know what else I love? You. You were so excited for your present, too, and I am sorry Clint gave you rocks. I hope my present is better. No, I am not talking about fingering you under the table while we ate, but that was fucking hot, right? You were fucking gushing for me, baby, so fucking sloppy. I know you were struggling to stay quiet, but I was struggling, too. Do you know how fucking hard my cock was? Oh, oops, I think I am getting off topic. I wasn’t talking about that present, I am talking about the one that’s under the tree (if you are not letting me open mine before tomorrow, I am not letting you open yours, either. Those are the rules (I am pouting as I write this)). I think you are going to like it, I saw you looking at it for a while now. And here you are thinking I don’t remember much (true), but if my baby likes something, I am sure as hell remembering. I hope it is going to make you happy. It won’t make you as happy as you make me, but at least a fraction of it? I can’t wait to see your face when you open it, I hope your eyes will keep that excitement you always get when you are opening presents, not like when you opened the rocks. I do have admit though, the look you gave Clint was hilarious. He’s a shitty secret Santa, isn’t he? But you aren’t. You don’t know it yet, but you have already given me the biggest gift possible, baby. I am not talking about the one under the tree. The days you spend with me are the sunniest of my life, and I can’t wait to spend more with you. I love you to the moon and back, you know that, right? Because I do. And I can’t wait to love you forever and always. -Love, Sammy”

Shane: “You know I am not the biggest fan of this. To be honest, I still think it’s humbug (I grew to like that word, though), but Jas told me that you give people you care about a card for Christmas, so. Yeah, surprise, I care about you. I hope you have noticed by now. Why do these cards even need so much glitter? I made you one so it wouldn’t look like a fucking unicorn threw up over it, but the glitter from those flimsy store things is still sticking to my hands, like, the fuck? I pet Charlie earlier and he fucking sparkled, and I don’t know how to get fucking glitter out of feathers. It’s not like I didn’t try. I even fucking googled, and now I get ads about little arms you can put on chickens… Reading back, I think I am trying to avoid getting to the point, but that’s not because of you. No, it’s because of me, because I am scared that if I write down what I feel, realization will kick in for you and have you run for the hills, but I just need you to know. I love you, I really do. I know I have been a little very mean to you in the beginning, so…thank you for persisting and not giving up on me. I honestly don’t think I could have ever gotten so far without you - I wake up and don’t just feel like complete shit. I go through my day without just thinking about getting drunk. When you were sitting across from me at the feast, I noticed that this was the first year I didn’t have some sort of alcohol with me. And when you smiled at me, I knew I wanted it to stay like that. I know I went a little rough with you there when we got home, but I just needed you to know, just needed you to feel how much you mean to me, how thankful I am for you. I don’t know what happened to me there, but it felt so right to just…pound it into you. But hey, the way you have scratched down my back and cried my name, I think you got the message. And if not, don’t you worry, I have enough time to make it stick. But I know you are waiting in bed for me right now, and I really want to join you, so… to cut this shit short (Sam would call it yapping, I think), I love you. A lot. -Shane PS: should we get little arms for our chickens?”

Harvey: “Hello, my love. I have decided that today is the best time to sit down and take some time to write this card for you. After all, winter is the time of consideration and love for others, isn’t it? And I have to say, I have so much love for you. I do not know how to tell you this, but I am simply going to try. You have brought so much new things into my life, it his hard to believe. I have always believed that I didn’t really like change, that’s why I opened my clinic in Pelican Town, after all. It promised me a slow pace and rituals, and, most importantly, rarely any changes. There are barely any people coming, barely any leaving. And then you came along, changing this town completely. And you changed it for the good. Just like you did with me. Hon, you made me leave the comfort of my bubble more than one time and in more times than one. You made me test my abilities, try out new things. I would have never gotten in that hot air balloon without you, for example. Would have never discovered that I love aerobics and dancing, and, to be honest, I wouldn’t know as much sexually about myself as I do know. You have allowed me to explore myself and gave me your safety. I didn’t know I had an oral fixation until I met you, if I am being honest, and I didn’t think I would enjoy going down on a woman as much as I do. Okay, well, maybe that is because of you. Your moans and gasps are just the sweetest, and I love the way you tug at my hair…Hoo, boy, I am blushing just writing this! I just wanted to sincerely thank you for showing me that I do not need to be as scared as I used to be. That it is okay to fall sometimes, to trust in the safety nets. I love you, my love. So, so much. I hope you will never forget this, and I hope you know: although you have shown me that change is okay – my love for you will never change in any other way than that it will grow for you. I love you. Yours truly, Harvey.”

Elliott: “The stars are shining bright upon us tonight, my sweet angel, the air is clear, and so is my head, but my heart? Oh, my heart is full of one of the rawest, strongest and most important emotions – love. And this love, my beautiful little angel, is directed to you. Sometimes I am asking myself how I, a mere commoner, so to speak, is deserving of such a carefully created being as you are. And then my thoughts cease, my tongue ties and my throat closes up out of nothing but the sheer fear that whoever was grateful enough to allow your love to be gifted to me will take this question as an offensive act of ungratefulness and take you away from me. What I am trying to tell you, angel, is, that I love you, wholly and completely, with each atom of my being, with every cell that keeps me alive, with every breath that fills my lungs, with every word I write, with every page I fill – I love you. Not only a day like the Feast of the Winterstar awake these strong feelings within me, no, it could be an ordinary day where I get to wake up next to you, your love-bitten skin just barely covered by a blanket, your hair all tousled, partly because of the sleep that still keeps you wrapped up tightly, partly because you have allowed me to make love to you. An ordinary day where I get to see your smile, get to see you is enough to alight this fire within me. If I am allowing myself to speak freely, even right now, just by writing this, I can feel my the warmth pool inside my stomach, can feel myself craving you in a way that is primal, and I know I could just turn around and please you, distract you from the book you are reading. But my angel, I won’t do so – not just yet. I first need you to know that your love, hopefully just as raw and ready to blossom like mine, is the biggest gift that has been ever gifted to me. No Winterstar could gift me something as dear as you, and I would never even dare to speak out another wish – as long as I have you. Please know, my angel, that you are my everything. My muse, my light, my reason to overcome writer’s block, my safe haven I will always be happy to return to. I love you. -Forever yours and fallen for you, Elliott.”

Alex: "Merry X-mas baby! You prolly know that I really suck at writing but this is our first X-mas together and I wanted to write you a card. because there are a few things I wanted to tell you you know? Like that I fell in love with you the moment you moved here and I fell fucking hard. Cheesy isn't it? But it's true. I don't really know how many nights I spent thinking about you. Okay to be honest, I didn't only think, I also busied my hand a little if you know what I mean ;) Just couldn't resist, you are just so pretty baby. So so pretty. Actually I can't wait to see you wearing that lil gift I got you. I think you are gonna like it but I am SURE you will like what I am going to do to you while you are wearing it. Can't wait to have my cock inside of you again baby it to be honest. I just love the face you make the moment I brush your cunt with my dick. Fuck that I love everything about you baby. Love everything you do when I plow you... I know I know, we already had our fun today, but I just can’t get enough of those moans. They are like my fucking fuel, you are my fuel. I dunno if I should tell you this, because I am actually a lil embarrassed about it, but do you know that audio I made of us fuckin? I sometimes listen to it when doin an especially hard workout because it makes me feel like I can do anything. I am drifting off right now right? I can't wait to spend this X-mas with you and many more to come because you actually make me look forward to it again. Christmas and the whole Winterstar season were so hard on me ever since my mom passed away, but you… you lift that gloomy cloud away from me. You make it feel like it’s going to be okay, and I am so thankful for that, baby. Damn, this season make me cheesy doesn't it? But to put it in a nutshell (I actually read that phrase in a book today are you proud of me now?): I love you, baby. ~Alex I actually did it I actually wrote a card can you fucking believe it."

Leah: “My sweet thing! Did I already tell you how cute you look in your little Winterstar sweater? Gives me the Christmas spirit in a way you wouldn’t believe! I absolutely loved how you told Evelyn what wool you were using to make it, even offering her some. You’ve just got the kindest heart in the valley, don’t you? You know I usually get artist’s block during the winter months, but when I saw down and looked at this piece of paper, it was like I just knew what I needed to do. And here we are, now that your Christmas card has dried, I can finally write in it, and I am going to use it to tell you that… I love you! What surprise, huh? Especially since I have given you that sculpture. But it is true, I love you. When we woke up together and slept together once more before getting ready…phew… I don’t know, I think I have never felt like this before. By the way, while we are at it, I definitely need you on my face again. There is just something absolutely breathtaking ( 😉 ) about you grinding against me so desperately while you are trying to eat me out… Look at me, sweet thing, already rambling and drooling over you again. But that is what you do to me… Sweet thing, you make me feel so genuinely happy and welcome here. I have always enjoyed my solitude in a way, fending for myself, being one with the nature, seeking out company only when I truly wanted it. But you showed me that there is another person I can rely on but myself, and for that I am thankful. You have opened your arms and your home for me whenever I needed either or both, and you are always believing in me, even when I had this dumb idea to sculpt a Winterstar tree with just cans. Yes, I will never drink that kinda wine again and yes, I remember that Shane blocked me because I spammed him trying to ask him for cans. But even though it was stupid and I was behaving like a maniac, you just smiled at me and got on your horse, telling me you’d fetch me some more cans. And you did. Thank you, love, for loving me, my art, and being a masterpiece yourself. I love you. -Leah. PS: I MIGHT HAVE AN IDEA HOW THAT TREE MIGHT ACTUALLY WORK OUT."

Maru: “Well, Christmas cards certainly aren’t my usual way of communicating, but I figured why not try out something new for once? You know I am all for trying out new things, especially if they make the world a better place. And if this makes your day a little better, then I am already one step closer to that goal. Was that cheesy? I think it was. I cannot believe what you are doing to me; ME, a clear-minded, well-structured scientist, being cheesy and absolutely whipped for you. It is true – I am. I do not what you did to me, but it did work. Every single day I wake up thankful to have you, and not only because you are such a willing little guinea pig (which you are, may I add. But you are my favourite <3). I remember when we had slept together that first time. It was NOT that I was a virgin, but… you made me feel things I didn’t quite think I could feel. I was actually feeling like you wrapped me up in cotton candy when you whispered these sweet things to me, and I didn’t think that was humanly possible (just to be clear, it is not!). With every kiss that you placed on my skin, with every thrust of your fingers, I was falling deeper, deeper, deeper and I absolutely did not want it to stop. I still do not. Is that greedy? Perchance. Do I mind that much? No, because it is with you. And here we are, just coming back from the Feast of The Winterstar, and I can’t wait to give you your gift. You had told me you had wanted to wait until the morning to exchange them, like you don’t know how impatient I can get. I just cannot wait to see your face when you open it up. You know, I probably have hidden it so well, but I actually am trying to support your farm with my machines. I build most of the farm helpers with you in mind. I am only telling you this because it is Christmas, though! Still. I love you. I love you really, really much, and I truly enjoy loving you. I know I sometimes might have an odd way of showing it, but now it is here, spelled out clearly, and I am happy it is. Because you deserve to now. Merry Christmas. -Your love loving you, Maru. PS: Did you know that the tradition of the Winterstar has a quite interesting origin?”

Emily: “It’s CHRISTMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS! I can’t believe this beautiful time of year is already supposed to be over again ☹. It always moves by so fast, doesn’t it?! Especially now that I have you by my side – it was like it had gone in a blink! One day we were cuddling on the couch watching this sweet little Christmas movie, and the next we were already at the Feast! Thank you for dancing with me, by the way. I enjoyed it a lot, even though we might have put a little show on for everyone 😉. Do you think they saw that I was not just dancing with you, but basically humping that sweet little butt of yours? Do you think they knew we were all over one another as soon as we stepped through the door. Yoba, you were so wet from just a little grinding! Okay, maybe a more than a little grinding, but your panties were drenched! But that’s okay, I was just as wet as you. I always get like this around you; it is like I just can’t get enough. You are so intoxicating! I have always known that, though, I could feel your vibes the first time we met and they were AMAZING! They still are, of course, but they also grew a lot stronger. I hope you know how happy the spirits are with you, my little butterfly! You just wouldn’t believe how happy I am that our spirits get to intertwine like this! I see them in my dreams sometimes, they are a strong unit. I wish I could take you along into that world more often, but it can be hard to channel all these emotions sometimes… Oh, my butterfly, I am just so happy to have you. I love you so much. It feels like colours are brighter with you around, even now in winter! I just can’t wait to see again what the other seasons are going to look like with you. And I can’t wait to spend another winter with you, another Christmas. I know that’s a little early, isn’t it? But with you, the future seems a lot tastier. Albeit now I would like to enjoy the present, because you are smiling at me, telling me we should share some Winterstar cookies. To many more present moments, butterfly. -Hugs and kisses, Emily.”

Haley: “Babe, thank you so, so much for encouraging me to take my camera with me today. Me being a summer girlie makes it hard for me to see the appeal in winter, but I actually got some decent shots today. You definitely need to check them out later when I developed them! But I have to say, even though those pics are pretty, they aren’t my favourite. No pictures can beat the ones I have of us, they are my favourite and will always be. Actually, well, there might be a set of pics that can beat those as well, hehe… Remember when you allowed me to make you my little model? You looked so pretty in that lingerie set. I am looking at one of those pictures right now, and I would be lying if I said that they didn’t do something to me. You just have a way to pose that makes me a little envious. Not much, though, because those pics are for me and me only. But the one where you grin at me with those hooded eyes…you just knew exactly what were you doing, weren’t you? Who knew a dirty little farmer had it in her? 😉 But look at me, rambling about photos again. I actually wanted to write you a Christmassy card, tell you how much I love you. But you know that, right? I know I was a little…judgemental in the beginning, but you know that you have found your way in my heart? Yoba, that was lame. Okay, you see, I struggle a lot putting these feelings into words because they are such…big feelings (jeewhizz, I sound like Emily), but…Let me try this differently. I am with you. I enjoy being with you. I love every day that we are together. You mean more to me than my camera, sunflowers and pink cake combined. There! I said it! And now I expect you to hold this card dear and never lose it, because I will not say this again. So, maybe I will, if you ask me. Or maybe right now, when you are sleeping so sweetly, your hair falling just right. How do you always manage this, getting your hair to fall like you are starring in an advertisement for freaking conditioner? You know what? That’s it. I am getting the camera, and then I am joining you. Merry X-Mas, babe. I love you. -Haley.”

Abigail: “I just don’t get how you do it. Really, I don’t. I watched you all night, and I am pretty sure your smile didn’t falter even once. Not even when my dad told you that stupid joke – “What did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house.” Ha ha, dad, really. See, it’s so stupid I even remember it by heart! Hey, I can’t deny that my parents love you, tho. Well done, I think you can sit at our table until the end of time now, sharing my fate. Fine, it wasn’t all that bad. I was having fun. A little. You made it better, you know? I felt like I finally had someone next to me that actually understands me. You always understand me, and I know you do. Speaking of…Yoba, if my parents only knew that you have taken me to the mines already you would lose that hard-earned spot at that damn table again. Especially if they knew what else we were doing down there… Oh, it gets me weak in the knees to just think about it. You were so rough with me… I know it was because you were worried because I wasn’t careful enough, but being choked against a stone wall? That was definitely something…Actually, I still remember that I had been barely able to walk back to the farm after you were done with me. What do you say? Does the handle of your sword still smell like me? I kinda wish it does… But it’s best if we keep this our pretty little secret, right? So you can keep the spot at our table and so that you can still take me to the mines. And perhaps so they can still let us be together with calm minds. I wish that I could tell you that I look forward to spending many more Christmases with you, but that would be a lie. I do hope to spend many days with you, and that you can make many more Christmases a tolerable experience like today. You know, you mange to make many things that I hate tolerable. So…Thank you. Truly. I know I am a lot sometimes, but please know that I love you. A lot. A crazy lot. And I would do a crazy lot for you. But for now, I am going to crawl in bed with you. See what you say to the present purple-haired Santa will bring you tonight. Good night, bub. -Your Abby. PS: I could have totally beaten that slime myself. PPS: probably.”

Penny: “Do you remember last winter? We weren’t together yet, but we still shared a moment that is still very dear to me, hun. I had dropped my bookmark into the snow, it was a papery one, beige at that, so looking for it was a lost cause. You had come by on your horse and without any hesitation, you had jumped to help me. Of course, we didn’t find that bookmark ever again, and I had been really sad, it had been my favourite. You had told me you were sorry and stroked over my hair oh so gently, as if it had been your fault. Oh, I had already been swooning for you, then! And then the next day you had come by, smiling at me as you held something behind your back. You had told me that Santa had passed by early before you stretched out something, a Poppy, carefully pressed and wrapped in a foil to secure it. I didn’t know how you had done it back then (now I know you like growing flowers in your greenhouse, and I love sitting there), but I kept it dear to me. I like to think that this was the point our relationship got its roots, and that’s why I will always hold that bookmark dear. When I looked at you at the Feast today, the bookmark came back to my mind, and I felt like a realization hit me. Our relationship – it is like a book. A carefully crafted romance by life. The only difference is that, while I love books, I have never been as involved in one as I am in this one. I am here for every single page, and I am eating them all up. No matter if they consist of our little reading ritual in the evenings, our date nights, the things you have taught me about living on the farming, our fights and… the spicier parts of our relationship, hi hi. I haven’t told this anyone, and I trust you keep this secret, but I did actually read some more…passionate books, but it never quite resonated with me. Until I met you. I don’t know what’s happening to me when we are naked, I am usually well composed, I think, but when you let me sit on your thigh, or when you guide our…ehe…you know, to grind against one another, something happens in my brain. It’s like a short-circuit, and I find myself wanting more, more, more. Ever since I have met you, I have also been feeling a lot more…lustful. But only for you! I tried to replicate these feelings you give me by reading books a few times, but I have never managed to do it. Weird, isn’t it? However! This isn’t y main point – my main point is that I love you. I love you more than a library of a million books holds words. I hope our personal book will fill more and more. I hope we will be able to fill our own personal library. I just want you to know: You are my favourite; book, topic, genre. It doesn’t matter. You are my favourite. ~With purest love, Penny.”

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respectthepetty · 19 hours ago

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The Heart Killers' Colors? - Ep. 6

I got my bizcochitos and boozy and spicy cinnamon dark hot chocolate (not champurrado, never champurrado), so I'm tipsy, jolly, and ready to watch episode six of The Heart Killers for Joong.

I mean for Fadel.

WAIT! I mean for colors!

Eff the colors! I'm here for water-based lube and condoms! Thank goodness for parents who advocate for safe sex, so I can get myself together after seeing Fadel do the walk of NO shame since Fadel should not feel ashamed for enjoying sex! Thanks, dad, for reminding me of my priorities!

Hold up! Are we switching to Shakespeare's The Tragedy of Othello, the Moor of Venice now?! Because that story dealt with lies and manipulation leading to multiple murders, and we all believe Mother has lied and manipulated these boys into killing others for her own agenda. *sips boozy hot chocolate*

Black Brooder Fadel is lightening up but is wearing red and Red Rascal Bison is wearing blue, so does this mean Style is a Red Rascal and Kant is a Blue Boy? I think the behind-the-scenes people are lying to me.

Style is wearing red again! And Kant is still on his bullshit, but they are sitting at a blue covered table. Does that mean anything?

It would be easier if Kant was a Green Guy (or even a Yellow Yal). It just makes more sense!

Because, regardless of what Bison thinks about blue, he is a Red Rascal.

See! Look at the blue disappear when he becomes passionate!

And a Green Guy would complement him and his aggressive and passionate personality. He would balance him out, and he would be the chill to Bison's no-chill self. They'd be chiles! They'd be Christmas!

And Style would make far more sense as a Red Rascal because of the way he brings out Fadel's desires!

Are you really a Blue Boy, Style?! I don't know because Dunk's arms are distracting me!

But I do know that I would go anywhere and do anything for this man just like Style does. If Fadel wanted to go to Top Golf, I'd go to that stupid frat bro place for my man. If Fadel wanted to go hunting in the woods for a week, I, a vegetarian, would go sit with him in silence for eight to twelve hours a day and make just enough noise to warn the animals, so he couldn't shoot any of them. And if he wanted me to eat Colorado green chile, I would NEVER DO IT because that's fake green chile and a stew, but I'd watch him eat it (while I eat Hatch like a proper person). That's the power of Joong Fadel.

Alexa, play Letters from Cleo's version of "I Want You to Want Me" from 10 Things I Hate About You!

Didn't I see you cryin' Feelin' all alone without a friend You know you feel like dyin' Oh didn't I see you cryin' I want you to want me I need you to need me I'd love you to love me I'm beggin' you to beg me

This is literally the only color I trust in this show right now, Cinematographer Rath.

BECAUSE PINK = 💕LOVE💕

Oh, thank goodness, the brothers are back to their true colors, and by that I mean chloroforming people until they pass out.

WHAT ARE YOUR COLORS?! JUST TELL ME ALREADY!

Now is not the time to serve cunt. Put those tits back in, you two!

Interesting that Mother is not in full red, but like a dulled orange-ish red.

Even more interesting that Keen matches her. I'd be wary of this kid if I was Bison and Fadel.

Kant is now giving me Beetlejuice and Foot Locker realness, but, thankfully, Style is offering me up some of that Blue Boy-ness I keep hearing about. Yes, Style, be loyal to your man! You are in love with a criminal and this type isn't rational; it's physical.

WHY ARE YOU WEARING RED AGAIN THOUGH?! Is it for love?! Fadel is, once again, light. He loves you too, Style. HE LOVES YOU TOO!

Bison is fully back in red now, and I do not think it's because of 💕love💕. 😬😬😬

Kant thought he was going to put Bison behind bars.

But it's about to get very gay and murderous up in here. In the words of one of my favorite Kesha songs, "This place about to blow" and not how Bison usually does it for Kant.

Kant, this twink is going to end you.

That's what you get for not showing your true color.

#the heart killers #the colors mean things #color coded boys in love #I love this for Bison #he deserves to hurt a man #especially one who won't show his real color #episode six

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abrthephantomq · 3 hours ago

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You tell me I'm a good boy or a good pet and I'll melt in your hands. - Jazz, probably, when he figures out that he's a simp for Zim even if he doesn't realize WHY he's obsessed with him.

Zim this, Zim that - he's all you talk about, Dib. Maybe you don't actually hate him. Maybe you actually like, wanna suck his dick or something --

GAZLENE --

what? Am I wrong?

Nnn-- I mean -- yes. Yes you're wrong Gaz.

Hey, have you noticed there's lots more planes flying overhead around here, lately?

Yeah, that'd make sense and all, considering what happened last week.

What happened last week?

...........Dib. You know what happened last week.

I don't, actually -- oh no...

What is it? Why're you acting so weird? Like, weirder than usual?

Fuck I overshot.

What do you mean, you overshot?

Gaz, what year is it?

It's 2001. Why?

Month?

September --

Of course! That's what happened, last week. Thanks. I forgot for a second. That's all.

How could you forget about it? All you've been talking about is how Zim was the one who did all of it --

BECAUSE HE DID, GAZ.

What?

That was ZIM - he didn't manage to sell any candy bars so he lost our bet. He was so confused why humans weren't falling to their knees, terrified. In those EXACT words. I have a recording of him saying just that.

What the hell, Dib --

:voice recording plays - Zim sounds absolutely devastated: "they didn't even blink an eye when I put that city in ruins. How can these humans be so.... Eh? I forgot the word, what was I saying?

Oh. Yeah. These hyumens aren't scared of my super scary simulation of me destroying one of their precious cities! They just shrugged and said whatever. I don't want your fucking candy."

Do you humans not get enough moneys to buy these things? These are....really good chocolate. Like, I expected them to be sand based on the name of them, but -- they're actually good? Is this a PRIVATE school?

[Dib's voice can be heard in the background; he apparently planted a bug that looked exactly like The Bug --, right where Zim tended to look at himself in the mirror. Because Zim likes to talk to himself out loud - but he's gotta see his reflection to do it. But Zim's eyes are fucking terrible and he can't see shit, even with his occular implants. Even though he is an Irken Elite. You're not gonna get anymore information from me than that. Either way, you hear enough to know that it's Dib speaking, even if you can't make out what he's saying. But Zim can hear him even if Dib is WAYYYYYY. Over there bc of his antenna. Like. You can hear a Dib when he is in his home. That is how much better Zim can hear than Dib]

Did you really just hijack me, space boy? I'm trying to tell my part of the story here as the fly on the wall of every single moment the two of you think you're alone.

Bobby Dawn what are you doing. (Barbie Dan?)(nah, Bobby Dawn. But if you wanna say it where people hear the name both ways, go for it)

Anyways, Steven asked for my assistance with the next chapter of class clown. This ain't the next, next chapter, but it is a chapter that'll show up later down the road. He's gotta finish a Mr. sludgey POV, first.

This just the super unedited version done while I'm high bc I love creating bonds and strengthening them via writing them. That includes my TikToks and my journal entries I ain't shared with y'all and all the writing we ain't shared with y'all, neither.

Gonna go get myself some lunch now, tho. Been at this long enough. ❤️ Have a good day now, y'hear?

All fanfiction authors have praise kinks in the form of comments and likes

#lmao serious tho #i got a comment this morning that was just KUDOS over and over and a keysmash #and i have been on cloud nine all day #like awww yay you wanna see where this fic is going?#man i hope you know you're in for a wild ride #because i dont know either #lolololol #❤️ love y'all #invader zim #encoder/recorder AU #class clown #work in progress #agent m #signing off

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mjbarrosart · 3 days ago

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My Dragon Prince Boards season 7, episode 702

The time has finally come for me to talk about my boards for the last season of the Dragon Prince! Wow, time flies!

To be honest season 7 was such a hard season to make. Telling a good story is always a challenge, but ending one, oof! that is an herculean job!

I remeber everyone being super stressed during the production of this season, because time was always in short supply, and it is really hard to produce great art with little time, haha.

Also, I think that after a year and a half working non stop doing boards for the show, most of us where starting to feel exhausted, and you can see it on my boards, they are much less polished than usual.

But, no matter the context and circumstances, we always try to deliver the best we can and tell the ending of this arc in the most satisfactory way possible.

Lets start with my sequences. First one is the one with Ezran's council in the Banther Lodge.

This one starts with the little exchange between Soren and Corvus, I really like these two. I think they grew on me as a duo during my time in the show. Soren was already one of my favorites, but by the end of season 7, Corvus and Soren was a top pair for me, too.

I think that, whatever you think their relationship is, physical touch is a thing between this two, they are always touching each other, there is some vulnerability that they allow with each other that is endearing.

If you read my comments about my boards in season 6, one of the things I was talking about is how sometimes the expressions we draw in boards don't translate that well to the final animation (This happens in a lot of shows, and it's because of limitation on the face rig of the characters, nothing related to the talent of our crew, because they are all super talented) This little shot is another case, I wanted Callum to feel like "Oh boy, shit is hitting the fan!"

I think this scene is mostly about the conflict between points of view, Callum and Rayla wanting for Ezran to free (and forgive) Runaan as soon as possible, while Ezran is struggling with his emotions. It's a hard one.

To be honest I understand Ezran 100% and I know that the right thing for him would be eventually to forgive Runaan, but is not something that could happen inmediatly. Grieve and angry are feelings that can get poisonus really easily, and they need time to heal and allow perspective.

I think Ralyla made the wrong choice bringing Runaan to Katolis.

Anyway, I wanted to play this sequence (and the next one) a little as a power play between the brothers. There are two forces pulling Callum rigth now, and the tension is growing because of it. I like this shot, I think, is cool.

My next sequence is the continuation of the Banther Lodge Council scene. Rayla is out of the building right now, and Callum is deeply distracted.

But we start with a little coment of comedy with Soren "testing" the bread. This shot ended flipped, but the idea is still the same, I am glad the keept the moment of Soren putting the bread on his mouth, haha.

Again this scene mix two trains of though or conflicts together, in one hand you have Ezran trying to figure out how to lead his people in a way that makes sure a tragedy like the burning of Katolis doesn't happen again. And in the other hand the struggle between Callum loyalties, and his inhability to be what Ezran needs him to be right now.

This is not hate to Callum, I think that his desicions are pretty ok taking in consideration that is he still a teeneager. But I feel that he gets tunnel vision when things are related to Rayla, and he failed miserably as a brother and member of the council during this time.

While I think Callum is right, Ezran should forgive Runaan, he should be there to provide love and support to his brother, and advice and perspective to his king. Space for Ezran to come to the conclusion that forgivenes is the right path.

Anyway, I had this gesture boarded with Ezran hitting the air, but they ended adding the cup there for him to toss. I don't know how I feel about it, It's fine (specially if you talke into consideration that the Anya pick up the cup and give it back to Ezran) but feels a little off to me. Not sure why, tho.

I like Anya and Ezran relationship. I think I would appreciate it if she also took the place that Callum was failing to fulfill and gave some space to Ezran to grieve and process his sadness in a more intimate level. Like as friends more than as "heads of state". But anyway, she is cool, I am glad Ezran had someone as his side during this time.

I remember that one of the instructions I got for this sequence was to make sure that Ezran feels like a mob boss. Hahaha. Funny, tho. But besides that, I think that something that I was glad to see and board was Ezran taking more action and having more agency.

Maybe we can disagree with his point of view, but it was great to finally see him taking the reins of the kingdom, being active and assertive with his actions.

My last two sequences in this episode were the talk of Callum and Ezran close to the fireplace. I think this was an instance of Callum trying to be Ezran brother, giving him support and love and helping him to see the erron of his ways.

BUT, and this is a big but, I feel that all of this feels empty and, from Ezran point of view, manipulative; because after this talk Callum right away decides not only to "betray" Ezran but also to leave him alone. And that was not pretty wise of him, imo.

It is always a pleasure to draw any character making a suspicious face, hahaha "I don't trust you":

I think during the first part of the talk, the sibilings are on pretty opposite sides, there is a rift between them, and it is hard to close. But then there is more space for vulnerability and trust.

I think a really significant momen is for Ezran to remove his crown. "I am not talking as the king, but as your brother" kind of moment. Humanizes him a lot and shows the sincerity of his words.

He is confesing here, how he is tired, how this dury felt on his shoulders even when he was not ready for it, and how much he is trying to carry the burden, but oh boy, how heavy is the crown!

And I feel that this is the part when Callum made a mistake. Instead of listen to him, to recognize his pain, to offer his aid and support, some kind of "you don't need to do this alone" kind of thing, he brings the topic back to Runaan.

And then he shots the shot: "You forgave Zubeia" And ouch! I mean, he is right, that is something that Ezran did, but I don't think this is the moment to bring it. But again, the conflict here is that none of them can see the other right now. Callum is too worried about Rayla and Runaan, and Ezran is too hurt and overwheelmed.

And I wanted to make the shift clear, so Callum literally points fingers at Ezran. He demands action, he expect his brother to do what he wants him to do, not what Ezran needs to do. In an ideal world there would be a trial for Runaan, one where we can hear both parties, where Ezran can express his feelings his doubts and grieve, that could end in him finding forgivenes in his heart.

But it is not an ideal world. Things are falling apart, and the struggles between the needs and wants of characters are in conflict. So, people make bad decisions. That is good writing if you ask me.

Then Zym intervines, he wants Ezran to forgive Runaan, not for the same reasons than Callum, tho.

I think in Zym's mind is more an attempt to get "the old Ezran back". So Callum and Zym try to make their point together. I wanted to paint it as if Zym has this naive approach to the stituation, while Callum is a little more manipulative (I don't think that on porpouse) being like "look, even Zym agrees" failing to see why Zym is agreeing. I think the sin of Callum in all this episode is blindness (or tunel vision as we said before)

And kinda works. Not because Ezran is ready to forgive, but because I feel that there is something inside Ezran that thinks like Zym too. That maybe there is a way to go back to be like he was before.

And that is the thing, pain and grieve change you, and accept that change is part of growing up. Aaravos talk about that a lot this season. So there is a little truce, a moment of "maybe" from Ezran. I really like to draw this two together.

Sadly this moment gets interrupted by Soren asking for help. And from here is downhill. I think Callum's actions after this point did not help at all to Ezran to heal or change his mind.

The fact that Callum decided to leave probably made Ezran wound worst, and any hope that this conversation could bring for the brothes to get back together gets shattered.

Great setting up of their conflict for this season, imo.

Well that was my work for 702. Thanks for reading this brickwall of text! Hope you like this! And feel free to ask if you have questions about the storyboard process!

See you for 705 boards soon!

#the dragon prince #dragon prince crew #storyboards #dragon prince spoilers #mjbarros #the dragon prince season 7

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usagiarchive · 12 hours ago

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what is love? — jing yuan x reader (in the eyes of yanqing)

"Ooh, maybe someday, could it happen to me too? When will it be? Who will it be? I wanna know, know, know, know, what is love?" — TWICE

sypnosis. [ 0.4k words. fluff. family. ] — When asked on the question of love, Yanqing thinks of his parents.

“Mama, what is love?”

You turn your attention to the little boy snuggled into your side as you read him a Xianzhou fairytale.

“What do you think love is, honey?”

The kid pondered for a moment before answering, “You and Dad are love!”

The joy he displayed on his face melted your heart and you couldn't help but bundle him up in your arms.

“Really? How so?”

“Don't you and Dad love each other? Isn't that love?”

You smiled and laughed a little, “That's an action, sweetheart, we love each other, it's not really a meaning, sweet boy,”

He tilted his head at you like a seal, very confused.

“The meaning of love and being in love are two different things, honey,” you tell him, not knowing how to approach the subject of love with a four-year old child.

“Think of it this way, let's think of love as your swords, Swords and using your swords are two different things, right?”

The child blinks up at you, “Mama, I understand… but at the same time I don't…”

You laughed and gave him a kiss on his forehead, “I'll explain when you're older, but for now… bedtime!”

…

Yanqing doesn't remember the interaction now that he's grown older, but if he thinks about what love is for him, you'd find his answer the same.

Love for him, was you and his Dad.

In the way that you learned to love tea as he did, even if you didn't like it at all, detested it at first, all because he loves it and you love him.

In the way his Dad never let you do anything when he's around, during grocery runs he'd lift all the bags and just let you hold his hand, during your weekend dates, he'd never let you worry about anything.

In the way you'd immediately get a pillow and a blanket if you find him sleeping in the patio (and most of the time join him), because he always complains about the crick in his neck he always has when he wakes up.

In the way he'd never seen the two of you have a serious fight, not in front of him at least, or not long enough that he'd notice because the two of you resolved anything within minutes of talking.

In the way his Dad would always peel an orange for you to share, “A half for your Mom, a half for me”, even if you'd go for a second orange, half of it will always be the other’s.

So yeah, if ever you'd ask Yanqing what love is. His answer would be you and Dad.

And maybe… he thinks as he pictures a certain spitfire girl that burrowed her way into his heart, maybe he can find a love like that, too…

usagi's note: december has been so incredibly kind to me (aside from me breaking my foot and not getting sunday) it's actually been so nice, ive met more people in this app and people here are so supportive and nice! i think ill enjoy this more hehe, merry christmas guys :))

also guys how do you do the tiny text thing? im so interested and i kinda wanna try that type of format in my works.

@usagiarchive 2024. do not repost, translate, or use for AI.

#jing yuan #fluff #yanqing #pov yanqing #jing yuan x y/n #jing yuan x you #jing yuan x reader #hsr #hsr x y/n #hsr x you #hsr x reader #fanfic #archive of our own #ao3 #dividers by cafekitsune

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creatingblackcharacters · 8 hours ago

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Say, if someone were to take a long time (more than months) before speaking up about racism, are they wrong for not immediately addressing it and instead letting the hurt fester? The first time it happened I was questioning my own perception, and by the time I became sure, it feels like it's too late (and it's also been very long after the last time I saw it happen too), and I feel like I also played a part in not immediately speaking up because of fear of the consequences. None of the racism were big enough, but if I were to list every instance then wouldn't it look like I'm being petty and trying to smear campaign someone? Or immature for being avoidant and not communicating my hurt immediately?

I'm going to approach this from an antiblackness perspective, since that's what I talk about here.

I think it depends on a couple of factors. Are you Black? If so, then no, it's not wrong to feel hurt about it no matter how long ago it happened. What you experienced was wrong, and it'll always be wrong. Plus, not wanting to speak up because you know it'll just be a threat to you is a common reason why Black people usually don't speak up about racism. Because yeah, you'll get dogpiled and gaslit and abused when you dare suggest someone was *gasp* bigoted toward you and needs to apologize! There's no statute of limitations on racism, and we shouldn't have to create an entire case to prove ourselves the way we do. That said, if this is a stranger, you will probably not be able to approach on the offensive because you let the time pass. So unless you have receipts, really all you can do is block them and move on with your life, or tell them privately "hey, this thing you said/did wasn't okay. I didn't say anything before because I wasn't sure how you'd take it, but I have not felt as safe around you since then, and I felt you needed to know" (and then probably block them). And you can't expect them to take it well- all you can do is say something, if you choose to at all. And if they take it that poorly, now you have the ability to tell others "yeah, this person did not take hearing about their bigotry well, and is not safe for Black people to be around". Because I would want to know if who I'm sharing from hates me.

If you are not Black, then I want you to consider (using your words) why the racism wasn't "big" enough, especially given that it wasn't dangerous towards you. What do you need to see in order to speak up? And by allowing it to get that large, recognize that you helped create a space where that behavior was safe and acceptable by saying nothing when all the "small" racism was occurring! That said, people are going to take it as petty regardless of your intent, because that's how racism is treated both here and outside the internet. It may be demeaned, treated as a smear campaign, because people think calling out racism is worse than being racist. So it really depends on how much you're willing to stand on it. You saw all these things happen, you have the receipts, you know you're in the right- are you willing to speak up? Are you willing to accept what may happen, or are you more worried about your own comfort? Maybe you'll allow Black people who saw all that racism feel heard and valid, so they can speak up too. Maybe you'll start a conversation that needs to be had. Maybe you'll be a step towards cracking that environment where this racism was acceptable, or worse case scenario, you'll recognize that this isn't a place you want to be if racism is treated so lightly. Those are hard decisions!

Sorry that this probably didn't make you feel better, but it's not a light topic.

#creatingblackcharacters #thatsjusttips

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cometconmain · 1 day ago

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I have someone who comes to groom my dog because I physically can't keep up with it. He's extremely good at his job.

He also thinks Trump isn't all that bad a guy, the Democrats are the anti-human rights party, had no idea the Supreme Court was a thing/is controlled by Republicans and that's why so many human rights are being rolled back in America, refuses to actually use his privilege of having a preferential voting system to not have to vote for the two major shitty parties because he insists on believing nothing good has been done despite numerous proving points to the contrary in his own life let alone others' lives, thinks climate change is a hoax and can't wrap his head around why university studies need to be checked for a donor list and a fossil fuel company supported 'study' isn't reliable actually, hasn't even learned the most basic empathy concept of "you not suffering from a problem other people suffer from doesn't make that problem less important/you should care about people whose lives you don't experience", outright said with his full chest that maybe we should racially segregate the Olympics again actually, and a number of other toxic to downright rancid things I would have just written him off and slammed the door in his face for last year let alone a few years ago.

Don't get me wrong. Talking to him is fucking EXHAUSTING and I feel physically disgusting afterward having to just calmly listen to all these things he spouts which have historically resulted in entire groups of people being targeted for genocide and numerous other human rights abuses when left unchecked and allowed to fester at the societal level.

BUT HE LISTENS WHEN I CHALLENGE HIM.

I can see him actually seeing me as a human being worth listening to. He's older than me and definitely been down way too many right-wing rabbit holes for me to pull him onto the surface any time soon. But I'm giving him things to chew on and hopefully if we're lucky I've planted some seeds which will eventually grow into some semi decent human being plants one day. He's really ignorant and clearly under-educated and that itself isn't his fault and biting his head off isn't remotely going to make up for that gap and is only going to drive him further into the arms of whatever fucked up extremist conservative groups he's been listening to.

He is reachable. He's just also a very long project I only get to work on for an hour at a time every 6 weeks.

And some of the things I've said which I think were part of what got through to him involved showing empathy for him being a single father(? I may have mixed that up with someone else but I think he is) with a disabled kid. He shows empathy for disabled people because he's the father of one (and probably is neurodivergent himself I believe but unsupported and doing his best to give his son the support he didn't get from the sounds of it).

But yeah.

Listen: you don't have to take shit to the face if the person is solely malicious and trying to hurt you. No one is obligated to meet that with kindness and anyone saying otherwise can get fucked. There is a limit to how much bullshit someone can cop while the bullshitter acts like any emotional response to their bullshit is unreasonable/out of nowhere and that is valid on the part of the person copping the crap.

However, if you a) can handle coping long enough to break down those walls with unexpected kindness/it isn't dangerous for you to try that method (VERY IMPORTANT. PAY ATTENTION TO THOSE DETAILS. DON'T TRY THAT ON SOMEONE WHO IS ACTIVELY THREATENING/DANGEROUS TO YOU), or b) can tell it's soft bigotry/general ignorance driving the otherwise yuck things being said, do give the compassion and patient education route a try.

I've had numerous instances of me holding shitty ignorant beliefs I had no idea were actually harmful. The people biting my head off didn't get to me. The people who took the time to see I was just ignorant and under-educated on the matter (and hadn't yet developed the empathy for a group I didn't belong to) taking me aside and patiently dealing with my idiocy long enough to explain things to me in a way that got through my skull (and eventually into my heart as well) were the ones who fundamentally improved me as a person. I still have plenty of things I always have to work on. But I can tell you now I would be much MUCH worse without those patient, kind, educational interventions by people who could tell the difference between malice and ignorance.

The same applies to everyone else.

Human beings are human beings. All of us. Re-humanising each other is the last thing any of the politicians and extremist groups want us to do BECAUSE IT WORKS. IT BREAKS THE WARPED MODEL OF THE WORLD THEY PORTRAY AS REALITY TO DIVIDE US AND KEEP US ALL AT EACH OTHER'S THROATS INSTEAD OF CUTTING OFF THE FOOD SOURCE FOR THEIR WEEDS AT THE ROOT.

When we remind a hurting person that we are a person too, not the bogeyman the extremist groups paint us as, it shakes their warped worldview to the core. It makes them think. It makes them QUESTION. It makes them look at the flower the 'evil' Pride-pin wearer gave them because no one gave them flowers when their mother died and their hate begins to crack at the seams.

The things the world teaches men hurts men too. Teaching them they DON'T have to subscribe to that mentality all the way down to the roots of the patriarchy weed is the best and most effective way of cutting that mentality off at the source. Even if you struggle to empathise with men because you've been hurt; ok, valid. But it is demonstrably more effective, sustainable and long term changing to just get rid of all of it by addressing their pain and showing them how much healthier and happier they can be just in their own life let alone others' lives by casting off the system that hurts them too.

I'm pretty sure I'm just rehashing the same points here, sorry, but the concept of deradicalisation as a healing and long term change tool has been my social justice special interest this year so talking it out helps it solidify in my own head too. (And gives me strength to deal with bullshit because it reminds me it's worth copping what I can personally handle in order to get someone to think, change and grow, one exhausting person at a time).

part of the reason i love how bell hooks talks about masculinity is that she shows real compassion towards men suffering from the effects of toxic masculinity. she was conscious of how we need to unlearn the ways we talk about men + masculinity just as much as we need to unlearn the same for women + femininity. so many times ill see someone talking about toxic masculinity like (hyperbolizing here but only slightly) “these FUCKING STUPID BABY BITCHES won’t MAN UP and go to a therapist!!!” and like. i get the anger. but you see feminists recreating patriarchal manhood by only promoting good behaviors through patriarchal frameworks. any use of the term “real men” is bad because it reifies the idea that manhood is a special title you must earn, and it is something possible to fail and fake. & as important as it is to promote sexual equality + the pleasure of non-cis-men, lots of people are essentially still working with the idea that men need sexual prowess to have worth but just shifting it slightly so there is more emphasis on women’s pleasure. but I want cis men to think about their partners’ pleasure because they care about their partners, not because they need to check a box in order to keep their man card. and don’t get me started on small dick jokes– and the absolutely pitiful excuse people will use that “well, I don’t believe it, but misogynistic men get upset when I say it, so it’s okay!”

basically bell hooks is so fucking right. in order to create loving men we need to love men, simply for being alive, whether or not they are performing. as much as we need to actively unlearn misogyny (and we do), it’s equally vital we unlearn patriarchal ways of seeing manhood. we can’t just assume that taking a feminist perspective automatically means there is no work to be done there.

#not transformers

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tackykachowch · 3 days ago

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Okay, here it goes. So, there's been this one thing that I was thinking about for quite a while. Almost a month, actually. Yes-yes, you guessed it, it's about s2 again. BUT!! With a twist. Let me show you what I mean

S2 introduced us to the (terrible) Vander's "apology" letter, a(n awful) flashback in The Last Drop, and the main element of our tonight's analysis - a (horrific) True Reason™️ for Vander and Silco's split up. In it we can see Silco throwing a molotov at enforcers and that led to F*licia dying. This enraged Vander and he tried to kill Silco. And what's wrong with that, you ask? Well, that was what I was asking myself as well. Because no matter how hard I thought about it I couldn't find a valid reason Why this feels wrong to me. So I went "Welp. Fine. Some things I just don't personally vibe with" but THEN. It Finally Hit Me. The thing that bothers me about this "reason" the most is the thematic dissonance.

Let's start from the very start (again). In season 1 ep2 Silco tells Deckard that "there's a monster inside all of us". See? This is a key phrase here. "There IS a monster inside all of us" meaning that no matter who you are, a hero or a villain or something in-between, there's ALREADY a living monster inside you. Let's take a look at a couple of examples. Vander let his monster out for a long time, hence why he became "The Hound of the Underground", but it didn't bother anyone since he was "the good guy" beating "the bad guys" up. Jinx showed her monster a little since she was young, and we can see it in how she was trying to make a working bomb with needles in it, but nobody paid attention to it since none of them worked. Deckard's monster was out and proud, but everyone was mocking him because he was weak. Mel let her monster take over her thoughts when she wanted to make Piltover her greatest creation no matter the price, even when the price was the lives of countless Zaunites. I think you get the picture. But why then Silco, the character who introduced us to this theme Himself, couldn't have one when he was young? What is the purpose of making him completely innocent? To make us sympathize with him more? Well, that's certainly a cheap trick, because people who wanted to emphasize with him already did so since season 1, and those who didn't probably won't do this even after the flashback. "Corrupted innocence" is not a bad trope, but like I showed with previous examples, it doesn't really mesh well with Arcane's world and other main characters. So, why not make it so Silco started to slowly let his monster come out to the surface, but Vander was so terrified of it that he decided to kill it no matter what it took? Because remember, the way Vander tried to kill Silco was EXTREMELY violent. It is very likely that he didn't want to take any chances with what he wanted to do.

Well that's all good and sound, you can say, but something isn't quite right here. Isn't the season 1 finale's title "The monster you created"? Why, you're completely right, my dear friend who is the other part of me I let to speak. But the thing is, these two themes coexist with each other, and moreover, they CAN'T exist without each other. There Is a monster inside all of us, ever since we're born really, but as we grow up and experience new things and meet new people more of these monsters can be created, or it can fuel the existing monster to become bigger and bigger (which still counts as creating tbf). Let's look back to the examples I provided earlier. Jinx was a little violent when she was a child, but then she experienced betrayal, grief, resentment etc, and they became her monsters as well, finally fusing into one in season 1's finale. Deckard's monster required only a little more power to become really terrifying. But there are a couple of characters who behaved themselves differently with their monsters. Because even tho there is a monster inside us, but like Victor said: "There's always a choice". You can love and nurture the monster, encourage it to become bigger and bigger, or you can try to ignore it, to seal it deep within yourself, until it finally bursts out, or you can accept it, live with it at peace and not let it influence you at the same time. That's precisely what Silco, Vander and Mel did, exactly in this order. And that's what makes the story all the richer and interesting, because characters deal with the same situation very differently.

So after all of this bunch of text I can finally and confidently say: s2's explanation for Vander and Silco's falling out is complete bullocks. Not only it cheapens the conflict between them itself, but also robs Silco and the story overall of their complexity and separates them from one of the main themes introduced in season 1. With that, dear audience, I bow out. Have a good night

#achievement unlocked: became more insane #i love when i have arguments because ppl stopped respecting the hate grind smh /hj #no but really. it was interesting to think about #silco arcane #vander arcane #arcane critical #arcane #arcane season 2 #don't tag as ship

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frost-eyed-autumn · 2 days ago

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Its been a long and winding year returning to tumblr in a more dedicated fashion for the first in a long while (not since 2019, yeesh! Time flies), but I can't really say I regret it at all!

With all its ups and a couple of downs, I've regained some of that old spark I used to have being in the RPC again and I really just wanted to do something paying it forward even if just in a small way -- so I'm doing a little something that used to be a common end-of-the-year tradition back during the golden years of the old RPC I used to romp in!

There's nothing anyone else has to do in return, this is just me giving a little bit of appreciation to all the people who have given me a reason to be here and really let me enjoy myself here again!

So one way or another, this is just a thank you to ALL of my mutuals who've made my time here a little bit brighter! Here's to a hopefully even better 2025!

@starsburned / @stormslullaby / @eiinn-ulfr

Cor, my bruhloved. Every list has to have you on it, naturally. I wouldn't even be here writing right now if you hadn't been the one to convince me to pick up Chuuya. Its hard to believe how close we're getting to the 8 year mark since we've officially become friends. I genuinely don't know where I'd be without you. You helped pick me up when I was at my lowest in the old fandom where we met, and that first time you let me vent to you, I really just thought you would be another person who was here today, gone tomorrow. But now you've woven yourself so deeply into my daily routine that I can't imagine anything less than having you part of my life. You're such an amazing person despite all of the absolute bullshit you've gone through daily that no one should have to suffer through, and I'm proud of you for still chugging along no matter how hard everything gets and how much you've grown and continue to grow. And more than just that, you're such an amazing writer to boot. You dedicate so much to every muse you pick up, whether it be a canon or an OC, and craft every one of them masterfully. From Rune to Dazai to Verlaine to Mori and all your other billions of muses (you fucking muse gremlin(affectionate)), none of them ever disappoint and I love seeing how passionate you are about all of them, whether it be in your writings or just your daily ramblings. Nothing would be the same without you here.

@memoryextrction

Things are still a bit new between us but I can say with full, genuine honesty you are one of the most pleasant people I've had the pleasure of getting to know! And I've had a lot of people come in and out of my life, most of them people that quickly showed they weren't good for me, so that's a compliment that doesn't come lightly from me, distant and critical person that I am about new faces. Even if I'm old and tired and can't always keep up with your energy, I always love seeing your messages and interacting with you, and just your overall maturity and decency as a person despite how young you still are and all of the shit you go through and struggle with on a daily basis. I only wish there were more people who could bring your kind of wholesome vibes to the world because the world seriously needs more people like you. And of course, your writing! The thing that got us interacting in the first place. I love our interactions so much and how much passion you put behind your muses, especially the characters who basically had nothing in their original series and really made them your own. I love the nuance and complexity and love you breathe into your 2-minute-screen-time muses and really give them the attention they deserve, and by god do they make for some of my favorite interactions of all time.

@nohumaen / @crimcpnish

We've only really begun to start talking in earnest, but I'm glad we have! Its rare that I'm pleasantly surprised by people, especially in dealing with tough situations, but you are one of those few people, and its a real breath of fresh air, let me tell you. I'm genuinely happy to have started writing with and getting to know you, and not just because your Kouyou (and Higuchi, and Fyodor) is fucking amazing, although that certainly helps! Your humor always gives me a good laugh, and overall I just really enjoy your company and don't regret at all bringing you into our little circle of friends. I'm wishing the best for you and those you keep closest!

@vulpesly

We don't write nearly as much as I'd like to these days, but just having you still around and part of my experience at all means more than I can rightly express. I always love our small exchanges and seeing Jono and Tachihara on the dash, and just how much care you put into your portrayals! Even just seeing your little rambles about other things like video games lightens my day a little. Thank you for allowing me to be part of your experience as well.

@inciteafflatus / @skilledsenses

Tenka! The bonafied cryptid of my circle of people. Its always a pleasure to see you around and your Ranpo is always so *chef's kiss* (even if Chuuya wants to yeet him through a ceiling every time). You're always so funny and pleasant to talk to, in the rare instances you make your cryptid appearances, and I'm glad to know you and always share in a good few laughs!

@ripheart / @beastlit

I know this year has been pretty rough on you, and I'm holding out hope that things get a lot better moving into the new year! I've really enjoyed what few exchanges we've had when we both have the energy to carry a conversation, and your amazing writings always leave me biting at the bit waiting for your next carefully crafted reply! Your Yosano is so beautifully portrayed and on-point I could swear she was written by Asagiri himself, and I really look forward to seeing more of her when life finally cuts you a break enough to return!

@eternalstarlights

Going to be honest, at one point I wasn't sure if we were ever going to meaningfully interact, but now that we have a couple things started I'm really glad we do! I'm really enjoying the little things we have going on between Kunikida and Ember and I especially really look forward to seeing how things develop with Ember because she and Chuuya honestly just seem like such a natural-born team to have working together and bonding over blowing things up!

@flamesignite / @hughesxmaes

We don't do a whole ton of direct interactions but seeing the constant shenanigans and total crack energy on my dash (at poor Roy's expense) is always a fun time even from the sidelines and is just about always guaranteed to get a laugh or two out of me. Keep doing what you're doing cuz its honestly such a joy to see!

@kitxkatrp

I'm really enjoying the little interactions we have going so far between Chuuya and Dazai and Mori! Its always fun having Double Black stirring up shit with each other and I definitely never have any complaints getting to throw Chuuya at a well written Mori!

@gyofukuki

Its a bit of a shame we don't get to interact more cuz you honestly just give me lots of good vibes whenever you're around! Though I totally get it with not being able to be around as much as you'd like to. I haven't forgotten the couple of things we managed to get started and I'm really looking forward to continuing them when you do manage to find the time to be back here properly!

@galaxy-0f-muses

It took us a while to really kick things off but I couldn't be happier that we finally have! I'm super enjoying the little thread we have going with Atsushi and Chuuya right now and I'm definitely interested to see how things will play out with Yosano once that thread finds its stride too! Here's to some hopefully fun, ongoing interactions because I'm really digging them so far!

@frozcnlight

We've only just started to really get things rolling, but I'm already enjoying the dynamic going on between Chuuya and Miran quite a bit! She's such an interesting contrast to Chuuya in a way that's bound to spark some interesting interactions between them. What those interactions will be, I'm not really sure yet, but exploring that and seeing where it goes has definitely caught my interest!

@spezialistin / @kokyuchusei

I always love seeing people giving some of the less recognized / appreciated characters of a series some love and attention, especially some of the strong female characters, and so far you really do immense justice to writing Higuchi! We may only have one little thread going at the moment but already it has me rolling around a ton of possibilities and ideas that I'm really looking forward to playing around with and hopefully I can inspire the same!

@ofdraiocht

Its good to finally get the ball rolling on something after being distant mutuals for so long and I'm definitely enjoying and looking forward to the interaction we have going between Chuuya and Odasaku! I always love playing around different timelines like Dark Era and what Chuuya's relationship might be to some of the characters we don't really get to see him interact with much in canon.

@voracitys

Its always nice to have a new face to write with and explore new possibilities and I definitely haven't been disappointed! I know Gin is still a bit of a new muse for you trying her out but what little we've written so far I'm really enjoying and love how you write her and look forward to seeing how these two develop! Especially being both Chuuya and Gin coming from somewhat similar backgrounds, even if she doesn't realize it yet, so there's a whole lot of potential there for the both of them that I'm eager to see play out!

@koriningyou

We're still kind of finding our stride in actually writing something together and kind of talked about that already, but trust me, I notice all the little Likes you leave on my posts and I really appreciate those small, daily affirmations that you're reading and wanting to interact! And I seriously appreciate it every time and look forward to once we get some momentum going on IC interactions as well!

@muses-of-kira / @alchemic-elric

We haven't really gotten to write much yet for obvious reasons but that doesn't mean I don't look forward to it! I'm wishing you a speedy recovery for your hand and I look forward to being able to write something once its better!

And just for following back this silly blog of mine at all, even if we haven't really interacted much (yet!)

@cursedlane || @seraphynm || @fullmxtal-elrich / @zodixcsorangekxtten / @cryptxd-laboratxry || @bookmcde || @doppogin || @cherrygardn || @pocketfulofgalaxies || @diverse-hearts-ocs || @rowanberryhub / @goeticedda || @ficryfingcrs || @paramythas || @avarlclouss || @mused-like-roses || @devouund / @vieaccorde / @straypaged / @yashabana || @teruoku || @hellshovnd

#ooc #The Mun #positivity #{--I'm not really all that good at the whole #positivity thing #esp on a regular basis #*jazz hands @ negativistic disorder*#BUT! I tried!#And I hope it brought a smile to ya'll's faces and that you're having good holidays--}

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pluralthey · 16 hours ago

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oh where is dawn from? and they’re both nonbinary right? could you share any info about dawn/devon’s relationship as well as keshet/outis’s, like how they got together, what they like about each other or what their dynamic is like, it’s so nice seeing how you portray different couples

minor other qs - what are your patreon tier benefits, i couldn’t really find them on the page itself

dawn is from the uk iirc and both dawn and devon are non-binary yes. i don't think i've fleshed them out enough to have a backstory for how they got together since they are side characters and it's kinda just a waste of time to develop supporting cast... i think that dawn likes devon's protectiveness, the way they seem to really pay attention to people and think about what they hear and observe and commit it to memory, and their strong moral drive that makes them reliable and predictable, but also easy to tease. if dawn is too fatigued to do something (which is frequent) devon is the kind of partner who is going to take care of it without needing to beg for the help. i think devon appreciates that dawn doesn't find them imposing or intimidating but also isn't trying to compete with them in some battle for dominance. dawn has a dry sense of humor that is easier to relax around than someone who is constantly trying to be a clown and avoid taking things seriously. they are generally easygoing but not impressionable and this works well for devon who is fairly bossy, because there is less headbutting without being a doormat. the biological compatibility between them is also a huge plus for both because they both want children who are genetically theirs. in particular i think they both value the others' qualities as potential parents as much as partners and how they'd compensate for their own weaknesses when rearing children. outis and keshet getting together i remember because i used to do character development streams.

tl;dr: outis in art school -> adderall addiction -> soliciting other college students for adderall -> meets keshet (also in college) -> keshet is attracted to outis's aura of confidence -> outis tells keshet that her girlfriend is trash (her girlfriend is trash) -> keshet breaks up with her girlfriend and feels more attached to outis for pointing it out -> outis has a heart attack and drops out -> they keep in touch and eventually start dating. they're both jewish, they're able to pass as straight, it would just work out for everybody if they gave it a shot so they did.

and i've drawn a comic about what they like in each other as well

now if i have to look at any more of my art from 2017 i'll have to kill myself unfortunately

#not art #ask #asks #suicide mention #did you know lola babysits their kids sometimes later in the timeline--

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the-moogle-of-your-nightmares · 2 days ago

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FUCKING GOOD POST. THANK YOU.

addendum: 'not caring about [group's] hurt feelings' does not mean '[group] is open season to hurt, and is owed no support, compassion, or understanding for pain that they feel, nor preventing or alleviating that pain.'

it means people do not have the right to hold themselves hostage against you being treated the way you, as a person, have the right to be treated.

a cishet parent might feel deep, genuine confusion and grief over their child coming out as trans. a white woman might feel deep, genuine distress, hurt, and fear over being told she's being racist. an estranged parent might feel like they're being murdered by their child setting boundaries or going no-contact. a partner might become suicidal over being broken up with.

all of these people have hurt feelings, and you do not owe it to them to spare those feelings by letting them walk all over you. you do not owe it to them to feel guilt if you don't, and you should be supported in that. you are allowed to slam the car door on that motherfucker's hand if they try to use it to keep you from escaping or locking them out until help arrives. that is what 'not caring about hurt feelings' means.

and guess what? guess the fuck what? people from privileged groups are not the only ones who do this. they're just more likely to have the direct support of larger systems to get away with it. it is in fact an INFAMOUS thing for queer abusers to use potentially facing harsher consequences than non-queers, or the idea that their victims are traitors making the community look bad if they tell anyone, or the idea that it's queerphobic to criticize or have boundaries against them to begin with, as a shield to get away with it.

i cannot describe to you the utter fucking dread i feel whenever a queer person behaves in a predatory way toward me or the people around me, unless they are in one of a few very specific groups who are in my experience near universally fair game. (holy shit the way people treat allegations toward transmascs, jesus fucking christ, not even beginning to mention QPOC.) and this is because i KNOW people will instantly swarm out of the woodwork to defend the queer abuser/predator tooth and nail, with every single last trick and line in the book to discredit, gaslight, and silence victims, and ultimately publicly tear them to little wet shreds as a queerphobe. this has happened over and over and over and over again with multiple demographics, just in my own experience.

and it's made me feel guilty for exposing my own abuse at the hands of people who are in those fair-game demographics people will happily hunt for sport. i've been abused by misogynistic, fuck-you-got-mine transmascs who blatantly saw me as a woman the moment they were in the same room as me after having medically transitioned themselves, and who leaned into being disgusting pieces of shit toward women and people they perceived as such to validate their own genders. they fell square in the middle of SO many nasty stereotypes about transmascs and i fucking hate that that is hanging over the story of my abuse when i tell it.

(funnily enough: they were both big fans of the attitude talked about above. 🙃)

anyway yeah, the conversation absolutely doesn't end there--for one thing, people like to try to make up excuses for why they're the ones whose rights as a person are being violated by not being allowed to haul someone's arm into the car door to crush it. but it has to start there. and you should be awfully leery of anyone who tries to position a group of people's hands as acceptable to crush in a car door at any time someone happens to feel like it.

genuine question: why is it so hard for people to shift their language from "i hate cishets" to "i hate queerphobes".

same amount of syllables. and then you don't have to sit there and go "well DUH we don't mean 'all' cishets we don't mean the GOOD ones." like you don't have to add an asterisk, here. just say what you mean. like forreal, just... say what you. mean. if you have to CLARIFY that you don't mean a certain part of that group then why are you saying it to begin with? why are you over complicating it and skirting around it like you're scared of making your own point?

are you really that attached to the conflict between queerphobic cishet people and queers that you have to reinforce it from your own side? are you really that attached to needing to hate something that you take it out on people who haven't hurt you. i've been hurt by many, many women- would you excuse me for saying i hate all women because of that? of course not. women can also be abusive, but that doesn't give me the right to hate womanhood.

it is so easy to shift the verbiage and have it actually mean what you say. unless you truly do mean that you hate the concept of cis heterosexuality, then i don't know what to tell you, but we don't do that here in the queer community. we don't hate people for their gender and sexuality. this is not the place for you if you want to shit on people for their identities.

#long post #abuse cw #queerphobia cw #transandrophobia cw #injury cw #(metaphorical but still)#suicide mention cw #racism cw #transphobia cw #misogyny cw #predatorjacketing cw #queertag #traumatag

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dragon-in-a-fez · 2 days ago

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I'm really sorry if this is out of line, but I keep ruminating on this and I just... need to ask. As someone with chronic health problems and also PDA (a profile of autism that is characterized by demands invoking a distress response), I worry *very* much about being doomed to be a hurtful lover because I legitimately *can't* contribute to household chores and such at least 90% of the time. And hearing about your abusive ex (who was an asshole and I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that) just makes me worry more. Do you... think that it would be possible for someone who can't contribute to household chores to be in a healthy relationship? If so, do you have any advice on pitfalls to avoid or the like...? Sorry again if this is out of line; I've been debating asking this for months probably and I just. I know this is probably hugely inappropriate, but I think... that my worry about hurting my boyfriend (who is the love of my life, very sweet, and I worry about him because he's a self-proclaimed people pleaser and worry that he doesn't tell me when I do stuff he doesn't like because of that; it's unfortunately a long distance relationship right now) is just too important. Sorry.

first off, don't worry about asking. I applaud you for taking the time to think about these tough questions. not knowing much about your exact situation I'm gonna try and make this a somewhat generic response.

the short answer? I don't believe there's any disability that precludes you from being in a healthy relationship, but you have to do 2 things:

first, contribute to the relationship in the ways that you can. the thing with my ex was, they didn't just not do chores. they contributed fuckall to the relationship in every possible way. everything from emotional support to money to help with insurance paperwork flowed overwhelmingly in one direction for 5 years. talk with your partner about what you can do to make their life easier and happier. I like to think about good relationships as communist, in a "from each according to ability, to each according to need" sort of way. my problem was I let someone set me up as the partner with all the abilities and none of the needs, which frankly, you're not gonna do to your partner if you're operating in good faith.

second, show some appreciation for the things your partner does for you. to be clear, I don't mean treat it like they're doing you a huge favour when they do the things you've agreed are their jobs. but like...I'm thinking about the day I spent four hours cleaning my ex's room while they sat on their bed doing nothing, and then they complained about how tired they were from watching me clean their room, and when I got mildly salty about them saying that, I got yelled at for two hours about how ableist I was. just like...don't do that. if your partner takes a whole afternoon to wrangle all your shit off the floor for you, maybe be like "I really appreciate that, you must be exhausted, do you wanna come cuddle and watch a movie now?"

ultimately, as long as your partner feels like they're cared for and supported how they need to be, and they're okay with caring for and supporting you in the ways you need to be, then you're gonna be fine.

#relationships

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nknoxe-n · 3 days ago

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☆★☆★→ Call Me Back? ←☆★☆★

Synopsis: Reo doesn't love you, and you don't love him, right? But you're both liars to each other and to yourselves

Tags: [angst] [pre established friendship][shitty ending its comfort I just suck at endings][not a nice ending but not a bad one in terms of angst][You both being in denail][unknown mutual pining][miscommunication]

w.c 4.7k

a/n: I think this is the longest fic I have written so far and surprisingly it's for Reo.. basically saying the rest of my account is Shidou and Rin. It is NOT proofread and I do hate it but who doesn't like two friends that can't tell they love each other and also if you see this and like my writing, I'm doing a match up event for 100 followers starting on the 26th :D

It had always been so easy to be around Reo. No matter how different your worlds seemed, no matter the distance that existed between his wealth and your modest upbringing, there was a connection that felt natural, effortless. The laughter came easily, whether you were sharing snacks on lazy afternoons or getting caught up in competitive gaming sessions where the stakes were nothing more than pride.

You didn’t care about the lavish gifts he’d sometimes try to give you, the ones that were meant to impress. Expensive perfumes, designer clothes—it all felt like an attempt to buy your affection. But you’d never wanted those things. They never impressed you the way he thought they might. You’d much rather have a poorly written note that made him smile, one that carried his personality, than something shiny with a high price tag.

When you thought about the moments that meant the most, it was always the simple ones. The evenings spent binging on snacks that could only be described as “junk” food, yet they were filled with laughter and inside jokes. The way he would tease you for your competitive streak, then turn around and beg you for a rematch when you beat him. Or how, when you lost, he’d give you that grin of triumph, but it never felt like he was rubbing it in. It was just… fun. Simple. Real.

There were nights when you both stayed up talking, no agenda, just sharing pieces of yourselves. You knew about his pressures, the expectations that came with being Mikage Reo—the heir to a powerful family—and he knew about your dreams of independence. You had your whole life planned out. The university you were determined to attend abroad, the job you’d pursue once you finished school, the career that would give you the freedom you craved. No amount of wealth or grandeur could sway you from your path.

Sometimes, Reo would try to convince you to let him help, but you always politely declined. You weren’t interested in shortcuts. The hard work and grit that would get you to where you wanted to be was far more appealing than any easy way out.

“What’s wrong with a little help?” he’d tease, flashing a mischievous grin your way.

You’d roll your eyes playfully. “Because I can do it on my own. I don’t need anyone else to build my future for me.”

He would just shake his head with a chuckle. “You’re stubborn, you know that?”

And that was the beauty of your friendship. It wasn’t about what you could offer each other in terms of money or status. It was about something deeper. The way he respected your independence, your drive. And how you never once asked for anything he could buy. You valued his company, his time, and the moments you spent together. You didn’t need anything else.

The bond between you two wasn’t built on pretense—it was built on shared understanding, laughter, and the kind of genuine moments people only experience when they’re not trying to impress anyone.

It was one of those nights when the air felt thicker than usual, the world outside humming quietly as you sat beside Reo on the balcony, the distant city lights twinkling like stars scattered on the earth. You were leaning against the rail, looking out over the view, and he was beside you, feet dangling off the edge of the low wall. For a moment, the silence between you both was comfortable, the kind that only happens when there’s no need for words. But there was an edge to it, something that had shifted recently—neither of you could place it, but it was there, hanging in the space between your breaths.

"How’s it been going?" you asked quietly, your voice gentle but carrying a weight of understanding.

Reo let out a slow sigh, running a hand through his hair. "The usual," he replied, but you could hear the tiredness in his voice, the subtle cracks that slipped through the mask he wore so well. "The pressure to be everything everyone expects me to be… it's exhausting. I can't even remember the last time I felt like I could just… relax. Be myself."

You didn’t answer right away. Instead, you simply turned to face him, your gaze soft as you caught the faintest trace of vulnerability in his eyes. Reo Mikage was never one to let anyone see him like this, to share these moments of uncertainty, but somehow, with you, he always felt a little lighter. Still, he kept his distance, pushing himself to be the heir, to fit into that mold. It was as if he’d built a wall around himself, and you were the only one who seemed to see the cracks in it.

"I know it’s hard," you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "But you’re allowed to be more than just the heir. You’re allowed to be you, Reo."

There was a quiet pause as your words hung in the air, and then he turned toward you. His expression softened, his lips curling slightly into a small smile. "You always know what to say."

You shrugged, trying to play it off, but inside, your heart was beating a little faster. There was something in his gaze, something that made you feel like he wasn’t just listening to your words, but he was seeing you in a way that was different from before.

And maybe that was why, when his fingers brushed against yours as he reached for the can of soda between you, the touch lingered a second too long. You couldn’t even call it an accident—it wasn’t, not with the way he hesitated, his hand barely leaving yours before he withdrew. The brush of his skin against yours felt like a spark, a tiny flame that started to flicker in the depths of your chest. It wasn’t anything monumental, but it felt… different. You couldn’t help but glance at him, only to find his eyes already on you, the faintest trace of something unreadable in them.

You didn’t pull away, though. It would’ve been too awkward, and somehow, in that moment, it felt like the right thing to do. Neither of you acknowledged it aloud, and yet, both of you were acutely aware of it, even if you didn’t say anything.

The rest of the night was quiet. But there were subtle things that began to shift. When you joked around, he’d laugh a little longer than usual, his gaze holding yours a second too long. And when you’d talk about your future—your plans to go abroad, to build your own life—he listened with a sort of intensity, the kind of focus he usually reserved for the most important matters.

Over time, your friendship with Reo began to shift in ways neither of you quite understood. The moments that once felt light and carefree started to carry a new weight. The way his hand brushed against yours as you passed the snacks or how he always seemed to linger a little longer than necessary when handing you something—those small, subtle gestures that had once been innocent started to stir something deeper.

It wasn’t anything overt at first. Just moments that seemed to stretch a little too long, a little too quietly. You noticed how he would sit closer than before during game nights, his knee occasionally brushing yours, and how, when you laughed too hard, his gaze lingered just a little longer than usual, like he was trying to capture the moment in his mind.

There were times when he would glance at you with something unreadable in his eyes, his lips curving into that smile of his—half-amused, half-wistful—and you found yourself wondering if there was something more to it. But you brushed it off, convincing yourself that it was just the comfort of your long-standing friendship. You were close. Maybe too close. But friendship was all it would ever be.

The more time you spent together, the more you realized how easy it was to slip into moments of closeness that didn’t seem to make sense. He would look at you after a silly joke, his eyes lighting up with that spark that made you smile back without thinking. You’d find yourself stealing glances at him when he wasn’t looking, your heart skipping a beat when your hands brushed in passing.

One evening, while watching a movie, you felt him shift closer to you. At first, you assumed it was because you’d both gotten too comfortable, but when his shoulder lightly pressed against yours, you froze. He didn’t pull away. Instead, he stayed there, his arm brushing yours once more. The proximity felt different. It was a closeness that wasn’t just physical—it was emotional, too. You tried to play it off, shifting awkwardly and pretending not to notice the way your heart was racing in your chest.

But you could feel his warmth beside you, and something in the air between you both shifted. There was no overt confession, no grand gesture. But in that moment, you both seemed to exist in a space where words weren’t necessary. The silence was enough.

Reo, as always, was the first to speak. But this time, his voice was softer than usual, almost hesitant. “I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he said, his eyes still fixed on the screen, but his voice carrying an undertone of something more. Something that felt a little too intimate.

You didn’t answer right away. Instead, you just leaned your head against his shoulder, feeling the steady rhythm of his breathing. You both had been through so much—him with his family, you with your plans for the future—and yet, this simple act of being together, of sharing this quiet space, felt like it was everything.

“Me neither,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, even to yourself.

And maybe that was the issue. Maybe you both knew, deep down, that this was something more than just friendship. But neither of you dared to speak it out loud. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

Reo was acting strange. Well, stranger than usual. You noticed it a few days ago, but it wasn’t until now that you started to realize something was different. He was still his playful, affectionate self, but there were subtle changes. He’d call you more frequently, texting to check in on your day, asking about the little things, the details that he never cared much about before. He started showing up at your place unannounced, offering to drive you to class, waiting outside after work to grab coffee—small gestures that, at first, seemed like his usual friendly acts.

At first, you thought you were just reading too much into things. After all, Reo had always been affectionate—playful, a little too clingy sometimes—but it was just who he was. You didn’t think anything of it. You didn’t want to.

One evening, you both sat at his place, watching some random movie that neither of you were paying attention to. Your legs were tangled together on the couch, your head resting against his shoulder. His fingers lightly brushed through your hair as he casually turned the volume up.

It was the closeness you were used to, nothing new. But the tension in the air was undeniable. His hand, which had casually landed on your knee, now lingered there. You shifted, and Reo adjusted so his leg brushed against yours. The small, gentle touches, the unspoken connection—it all felt so natural. So… familiar. Yet, in the back of your mind, a small voice kept reminding you that things had been different lately.

Reo cleared his throat. “Hey, you okay?” he asked, his voice unusually soft.

You turned to him, a little surprised by his tone. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired. You?”

He paused, his eyes flickering to yours before quickly looking away. “I’ve been thinking… about a lot of things.”

You raised an eyebrow but didn’t push him. “What kind of things?”

He hesitated, as if the words were caught somewhere between his chest and his mouth. Finally, he spoke, but it was quieter than usual, almost as if he was uncertain. “I don’t know. Just… about us. About how you always seem to know just what I need.”

You blinked, confusion flickering across your face. “Reo, we’ve been friends for so long. You know I’ve always got your back. You’re like family to me.”

Reo's expression faltered for just a moment. “Yeah, family. Right.” His voice trailed off as if he was trying to mask something deeper, something that wasn’t quite right. You didn’t catch it, though. To you, it was just another typical moment in your close friendship.

As the night went on, you both chatted and joked around, just like always. But your words stuck with him. Maybe it was his attempt at courting you—he wasn’t quite sure—but every time you responded with your usual platonic affection, it only reinforced his uncertainty. He didn’t know how to turn this friendship into something more, but he could feel that familiar warmth growing inside him every time you smiled at him. Every time you’d laugh, he felt that little spark. But when you called him “family,” it felt like a wall went up between you two.

The next day, you were hanging out at your favorite spot again, and Reo was acting more distant than usual. His phone buzzed, and he picked it up, reading something with a frown. He quickly stuffed it back in his pocket and shifted in his seat. You noticed, of course, but you didn’t mention it.

“What’s up?” you asked casually.

He glanced at you but then quickly looked away. “I’m fine. Just… thinking about a few things.”

“About what?”

Reo rubbed the back of his neck, looking more flustered than he usually did. “You know… maybe I’m just overthinking things. Forget it.”

It was as if a light bulb flickered above your head, and the pieces finally began to fall together. Reo was acting weird because he was interested in you. But the idea felt ridiculous, and it only made sense if you were misinterpreting his signals. You’d been friends for so long, and now suddenly, he was acting like he cared about you in a way that wasn’t just friendly. You shook your head, trying to push the thought away. No way.

You could feel the awkwardness stretching between you both now, as though there was some unspoken barrier that neither of you could cross. Reo’s attempts at deeper affection fell flat as you kept responding with the same ease, the same nonchalance. He was used to being loved and adored, used to being in control. But with you, it was different. It always had been.

That night, he finally said it—the thing that had been on the tip of his tongue all this time.

“I just… never mind.” His voice trailed off as he stood up, his frustration simmering. “Forget it, okay? I didn’t mean anything.” Only to immediately clam up, backtrack, regret.

You looked up at him, frowning. “What are you talking about, Reo?”

He didn’t respond at first. He just shook his head and muttered, “I’m sorry. I’m just… I don’t know anymore.”

The silence stretched between you, thick and uncomfortable, before he grabbed his jacket and walked out without another word.

Over the next few weeks, Reo threw himself into his work with Nagi, both of them pursuing their shared dream of becoming the best in soccer, and while it was mostly Reo's dream, it always has been, Nagi was his 'treasure' and key into the professional leagues. You noticed the subtle shift as he started spending more and more time with Nagi—long hours in practice, late-night strategy sessions. The calls and texts from Reo became less frequent, his absence more apparent. It left you with an uncomfortable emptiness you hadn’t expected.

At first, you were relieved. Maybe he’d gotten over whatever had been bothering him. But as the days wore on, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had changed. And you couldn’t help but wonder if it was your fault. Maybe you had pushed him away without realizing it. Maybe his feelings had been more than you had given him credit for.

You began to notice how much you missed him—the laughter, the ease, the way he could brighten any room just by being in it. You missed his presence, his warmth. And it started to sink in that you might have missed your chance to admit that, perhaps, you felt the same.

But now, he was slipping away, and you were left wondering if it was too late.

The game had ended, and Reo was still riding the high of his win as you stood at the edge of the field, waiting for him. You had come to watch, not because you had to, but because you wanted to. You had always supported him, even when his focus was more on the game than on anything else. He always seemed to forget to acknowledge you at times like this, but you didn’t mind. That was just how he was.

When the game ended, you waited for him near the stands, feeling the cool evening air wrap around you. Reo found you quickly, as he always did, a smile on his face as he jogged up to you. “Hey, you came,” he said, a glint of surprise in his eyes.

“Of course I did. How else would I know if you’re any good?” you teased, smiling back.

“Of course, you know I’m the best,” he said with his usual cocky grin, but there was something behind his eyes. Something softer.

The walk home was quiet, an almost uncomfortable silence hanging in the air between you both. You’d gotten so used to the easy banter, the casual conversations, and now there was this strange distance. It wasn’t that you were upset with him—not entirely—but something was missing, something that had been there before. You glanced at him, watching as he kept his gaze straight ahead, hands tucked into his pockets, his face slightly tense as if he was trying to keep something from spilling out.

You couldn’t ignore the feeling that had been nagging at you for the past few days—the weight of the silence.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. “Reo,” you began, your voice hesitant, but your heart felt like it was already halfway out of your chest. “I… I got accepted into the university I’ve been working for. The one abroad.”

His stride faltered for just a second. He stopped walking for a moment, turning to look at you, his expression unreadable. “You got in?” He asked, a mix of surprise and something else, but you couldn’t quite place it.

“Yeah,” you nodded, trying to keep the pride out of your voice. “It’s been the plan for a while now. I’m… going soon.” Your chest tightened, a mix of excitement and sadness flooding through you as the words left your mouth. It was everything you had dreamed of, but now it felt so heavy.

You looked over at Reo, and his smile was a little too tight, his eyes almost shadowed. He opened his mouth, but no words came out immediately. Instead, he turned his face away and began walking again, his steps slower now, as if weighed down by something.

“I’m… proud of you,” he said quietly, still not looking at you. “You deserve it.”

The silence between you deepened, suffocating almost, until Reo finally broke it again. “I’ve… I’ve been scouted,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “For a soccer program called Blue Lock. I’ll be leaving soon too.”

You froze in place, your breath catching in your throat. “Blue Lock?” you repeated, trying to make sense of his words you didn't know if that was good, but he always told you getting scouted by a big team or youth program was one big step towards his goal. “But… that’s huge, Reo. That’s amazing.” A part of you felt like your heart had just been ripped out, though you couldn’t understand why. Maybe it was the fact that you were both about to embark on separate paths—two dreams pulling you in opposite directions.

“I know…" he continued, his voice slightly strained. “I’ll be gone for a while. A long while. I don’t even know what’s going to happen after that. Things are just… changing, and…”

He trailed off, and for the first time in a while, you saw the cracks in his façade. It was the first time he didn’t seem sure of himself, didn’t have the answers.

Your stomach twisted painfully, and before you knew it, the words slipped out. “Reo, why didn’t you… why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

He flinched, his eyes softening for a split second, before he looked away again. “I didn’t want to… I didn’t want you to think I was just… going to leave. I didn’t want things to change, but they already are, right?” He stopped walking again, turning to face you, his voice thick with emotion. “You’re going, and I’m… leaving too.”

It was then that everything seemed to crash down on both of you at once. You stood there, facing each other, caught in a whirlwind of feelings that neither of you had fully processed until now. You had both been avoiding the reality of it, pretending that things would stay the same, even when they couldn’t.

The words started to tumble out of you, overlapping and colliding with his own. “Reo, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now, with everything changing—”

“I don’t want to lose you, okay?” Reo blurted out, his voice raw and desperate dominating yours. “I never wanted things to be like this. I—I don’t even know how to do this. I don’t know how to… let you go.”

Your heart stopped, and you stood there, frozen. His words echoed in your mind, but there was something more beneath it, something unspoken, hanging between you two like a fragile thread.

“I don’t want to lose you either, Reo,” you finally said, your voice barely above a whisper. “But we can’t keep pretending like things won’t change. They already are. We already are.”

You could see the hurt in his eyes, and for a brief moment, you thought he might say something more, something that would bridge the gap between you two. But the moment passed, and instead, he just let out a shaky breath, rubbing his face with his hand.

“I guess we’ve both been holding on to the wrong things,” he muttered, a bitter edge creeping into his voice.

And that was it. No more words. No more attempts at fixing things. The space between you had become too vast for easy fixes, and neither of you knew how to close the distance anymore.

Reo let out a breath and looked down, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “I… I should go…. Call me later?”

You nodded, unable to find the words to stop him. The emptiness settled in quickly, and as Reo walked away, you felt something in your chest snap, even though you couldn’t quite say what it was.

It wasn’t just that he was leaving. It was that, for once, he was being honest with himself—about his feelings, about everything. But the timing, the way everything had come to light, made it too late.

The days after that evening with Reo felt like an endless stretch of time. You focused on your studies, your new life, and the overwhelming rush of excitement that came with your acceptance into the university abroad. It wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t perfect, but you were moving forward. Every day felt like a step toward independence, toward the life you had always planned, and you couldn’t afford to look back.

The first few days after your conversation with Reo were quiet. You couldn’t call him. You just couldn’t bring yourself to. Not when everything felt so raw, and not when his words, filled with uncertainty and bitterness, still echoed in your mind. You told yourself it wasn’t worth dwelling on. But still, it gnawed at you—why hadn’t he called? Why hadn’t he answered when you tried?

Eventually, the urge to reach out became too strong, and you grabbed your phone, fingers trembling as you dialed his number. The seconds stretched into minutes, but there was no answer.

You tried again. And again. Until the hours passed, your frustration growing with each failed attempt. Your chest tightened, and a bitter feeling pooled in your stomach. Was it something you said? Something you did? Had you been too abrupt when you told him about your future? Or maybe… maybe it was something else. His life was about to take a new direction too, wasn’t it?

You tried not to overthink it. You tried to tell yourself that it wasn’t your fault. That maybe, just maybe, Reo needed time to himself too. But even as you sat there, staring at the phone screen, the silence felt suffocating. Your mind spun in circles—why hadn’t he called back? You had been so close, you had been his constant, and now… now, he was gone. No word, no explanation. The uncertainty ate away at you.

And after that, you didn’t try again. Days turned into weeks, and then months. Your life was in full swing—uni life, dorm life, new friends, new experiences. It was all overwhelming and exhausting, but it was yours. And yet, every time you caught yourself thinking about Reo, you couldn’t remember why it had hurt so much back then. Maybe it had been the suddenness, the unfinished conversation, the realization that your paths were diverging.

But even as life carried on, you still found yourself replaying that moment—the last time you saw him. His words. The way he looked at you, like something had shifted, but neither of you had known how to face it.

That day, you were sitting on your dorm couch, textbook open in front of you, trying to study. You glanced up absentmindedly, the sound of the sports channel filling the background as white noise. It was just a game, something to pass the time while you tried to focus. But then the camera panned to the field.

Your heart skipped a beat.

There, on the screen, a match between the U-20 team and Blue Lock, the program he'd told you about, the feed was pre-recorded, this would have happened hours ago back in Japan but was only coming to you now. But there was no mistaking it. It was him. Your best friend.

You froze. Your heart thudded in your chest, the weight of emotions you had buried deep in your heart suddenly resurfacing, sharper than ever.

Without thinking, you grabbed your phone from the table beside you, fingers trembling as you flicked through your contacts. You stared at his name, sitting there on your screen, and the weight of the decision hit you harder than you expected.

You hadn’t called him in months. You hadn’t even thought about calling him after those first few failed attempts. But now, now you wanted to reach out.

You hesitated, then pressed the call button and let it ring.

Each second felt like an eternity. Your heartbeat matched the rhythm of the call, and just as you thought it would go to voicemail again, it clicked.

Reo’s voice, so familiar, so distant, crackled through the line. “Hello?”

What did you say now? 'Reo I love you and I know you haven't called me back since I left and we'd probably never see each other between my school life and your soccer career but I saw you on TV and almost balled my eyes out because I miss you so much? No.'

So you settled "Hey… It's me… You told me to call you back? But uh.. you never answered…" "...I miss you"

#bllk #blue lock #x reader #fluff #scenario fic #reo mikage #bllk reo #blue lock reo #reo x reader #reo mikage x reader #some angst #just a teeny bit

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