#I don't know! I asked my friend who knows more about this stuff than me and he said yeah

[the-mountain-flower]

#? this is what i ask myself on a daily basis#when i feel like being talked to like a toddler i ask my parents that#and they always say stuff like this.#YES I KNOW YOU THINK CANNIBALISM IS BAD#BUT WHY DO YOU#WHAT IS THAT FEELING BASED ON#others dont do this?#< prev's tags#I've actually wondered this myself#by my observation#it seems like it has something to do with the idea that when something is consumed it loses its previous identity via digestion#and the general discomfort around the idea of/avoidance towards knowing the animal being eaten#like short-lived animals don't always get the “don't name them don't get attached to them” thing just because they're going to die soon#but farm animals raised for their meat get that because no only are they going to die#but they're going to get killed for the purpose of consumption#and going 'hey that bacon you're eating used to be my beloved pet jeff and he loved playing in the mud and bonking my legs with his nose'#tends to put people off of the idea of eating it#it's the same reason stuff like dog meat is normal to some cultures and such a horrible idea to others bc doggos are our beloved friends#or why cow meat is normalized many places but a horrific affront in others due to cows being sacred#people that culturally have pigs or chickens were beloved pets would probably be horrified at the idea of pig or chicken meat as food#it really depends on the perception of the animal#and humans are Us. the idea of eating other humans is common so off-putting because that was A Person With An Entire Personality And A Life#which tends to be a lot more prevalent in our minds than it is for other animals#plus I think eating human meat that's actually viable to be very edible would require murder so............ yeah

So apparently I still have more to say on the subject so uh...

Trigger warnings for dehumanization, racism, and genocide

As you can probably tell I've thought a bit about human perception of ourselves and other animals and what really makes us different since I don't think sentience/sapience is a mark of species supremacy or whatever. Why murder is Very Bad but killing animals without good reason is Less Bad? Why we hold more love for some species of animals and contempt for others? Why do people find Pinocchio plots so compelling? Why getting hit by a car and surviving means doing our best to save them as mercy for humans, but 'putting them out of their misery' as mercy for animals? Why is senseless violence less bad when it comes to animals and atrocious when it comes to people? Why is killing bad but being omnivorous or carnivorous is morally neutral? Or why being called an 'animal' is supposed to be an insult (because younger me Did Not Understand that because animals aren't bad (and also categorically speaking humans are animals))?

One of those things is why people who try to excuse stuff like racism and genocide with (extremely racist language warning) calling their targets 'animals' or 'not fully human' or just straight-up 'not human' and why it's such a prevalent tool for the oppressor,

Because when you think about it logically it doesn't make sense. Even if they were doing these atrocities to actual non-human animals, that doesn't make it okay or right. Humans wiping out entire types of animals off the face of the Earth is most definitely A Bad Thing, both because of the unnecessary brutality and because it's really bad for ecosystems. So why does dehumanizing propaganda suddenly mean it seems okay to cause mass death and suffering? Why would anyone think either of those things (mass death to people or to animals) are okay?? Why is anyone so desensitized to such unreasonable violence??

And I think it has something to do with how a lot of humans perceive themselves and other humans. Because of the us vs. them mentality that I think is a result of evolutionary need to protect ourselves from the dangerous parts of nature. I think that's the thing that gets weaponized as "humans are superior because they're Us." That's what causes people to care less about other animals than they do other humans, because it's a lot harder to kill a predator in self-defense or to hunt animals for food, if you're grappling with empathy for that creature. I think a balance is necessary, like when a hunter pays respects to the animals they hunt, but that requires thought and consideration for something unlike yourself, and that tends to be a lot harder than just getting yourself to have complete apathy when hunting for self-preservation. And that lends itself to becoming very dangerous when justification for violence changes with what you perceive as necessary, and when your perception of 'us' changes. Because if killing animals is fine because they're not human, then what's to stop you from killing anything you see even if you don't need to just because they're not 'us'? And what's to stop you from seeing other humans as okay to kill because they're not like the conception of 'us' that you've built up in your head?

Justifying atrocities with dehumanization, in my observation at least, seems to be a result of human selfishness taken too far, of dismissing the unity and need for diversity that's absolutely necessary for survival and more, and of constructed apathy.

...Wow I didn't think I had that much to say on the subject but here you go I guess. To be fair, this has genuinely helped me unpack and unlearn a lot of harmful internalized stuff. Of course, I'm open to others' views and constructive criticism.

[organic-bloodbath]

can you pls do a thanks x reader where reader is like lowk a bad ass. enemies to lovers kind of thing. maybe they have known each other for years. she tripped up during mingle but someone saved just in the nick of time but later in the bathroom he yells at her telling her he can’t lose her because he loves her. and then they kiss and stuff and fall asleep together (im a sucker for angst with a fluffy ending🙏)

I love you, fucking idiot

Thanos x Reader

Summary: As above.

A/N: Hope you like 🫶🏻

☆☆☆

You and Thanos had known each other since middle school. You wouldn't consider the two of you friends, honestly you didn't really know what you were since you wouldn't think of you as enemies either. You had always disliked him, atleast that's what you thought, but it wouldn't go as far as hate. More like he simply annoyed the shit out of you. Thanos had been teasing and bickering with you ever since you were teenagers, and he seemed to enjoy it. It was always harmless, he never actually bullied you.

"Well, well, well – look who it is," Thanos said as he approached you and looked at your figure from head to toe before continuing. "I see you've dyed your hair."

Your hair was naturally dark brown, but you had dyed it pink a few months ago.

"Did you do it to match with me?" Thanos smiled. "Didn't know you were so obsessed with me."

"You wish," you denied, rolling your eyes. "I haven't had a single thought about you in several months."

"So, you admit you've sometimes thought about me," he pointed out and brought his hand to rest on his heart. "That's so touching, Cotton Candy."

"Don't be so full of yourself," you scoffed. "And cut the nickname, it's gross."

When the game started right after, Thanos leaned a little closer to you.

"Wanna race?" he asked.

"For what?" you asked, right brow lifted in curiosity.

"If i win, i'll get to keep the nickname for you," he suggested with a smirk.

"And when i win?" you asked. "Because there's no way i'm losing to you."

"I'll drop the nickname."

"Well, challenge accepted."

As you were running forward, trying to ignore Thanos near you, someone suddenly pushed you, making you fall on the ground. You laid there on your back, managing to stay still when the doll turned around to scan any possible movements in the area.

"As clumsy as always," Thanos mocked quietly above you, smirk on his face.

"Shut up," you mumbled in annoyance.

When it was time to move again, Thanos offered his hand to pull you up.

"I don't need your help," you muttered and started to get up.

"Stop being grumpy and take my hand," he insisted.

You rolled your eyes and let him pull you up. However, he pulled you with more force than you had expected, making you almost to trip forward again but he held you still. You were standing against him now, your heads facing each other to make you lock eyes. Right then the doll turned again, forcing you to stay still for a while.

"Did you always have freckles on your cheeks?" Thanos muttered quietly as he examined your face closer, just thinking outloud.

"Duh," you mumbled and got off his grip when you could move again, taking a quick sprint forward to get ahead of him.

In the end, you did win the game just couple of seconds before Thanos, he was running right beside you the entire way.

"Ha! I win," you mocked him. "Didn't know you let yourself go out of shape when you started focusing on rapping."

"You were just lucky this time," he huffed and rolled his eyes, not wanting to bruise his ego by admitting his defeat to you.

"This time? You want to do this again, huh?"

"Until i win."

☆☆☆

The second game arrived the next day and you were supposed to form groups of 5 with each other.

"Alright, Y/N, you're with my team," Thanos stated, as if he had done the decision by himself.

"Um, no thank you," you laughed.

"What do you mean 'no'?" Thanos narrowed his eyes, taking a step closer to you.

"Now, what kind of competition would it be if we played in the same group?" you asked, crossing your arms on your chest. "The group that finishes earlier than the other wins."

"I see," Thanos hummed. "So what's the prize?"

"You'll see," you said and winked, leaving Thanos on his own without another word to search for your own team members.

Thanos wouldn't show it on the outside, but seeing you go and find a different group stinged his heart a little in a horrible way. Having you in the same group would have meant to either die together or live together. Being in different groups would mean the other could die while the other lived. But he couldn't force you to be in his team, no.

Your group played first and you did end up winning five seconds earlier than Thanos' group. It pissed him off so badly how you could win him twice and then rub it on his face afterwards.

"So, what do i owe you?"

"Besides all those pens you never returned to me in middle school?" you asked. "Hm. New shoes."

"Aw, is that a way to ask me to go shopping with you?" Thanos asked, having that same smile on his face which you hated. "I knew you liked my company."

You just punched his shoulder before leaving.

☆☆☆

The third game started, and along with his own team, you stood next to him as well.

"Now, you're not going to start wandering around this room on your own, got it?" Thanos said to you.

"What are you, my dad?" you scoffed, but having a playful smirk on your face. "You can't tell me what to do."

God, it started to annoy him how you took this as a joke. He wanted to keep you safe – no, he needed to keep you safe.

"You're not going to leave my side, are we clear?"

"That bossing me around is both annoying and kind of hot," you admitted, one of your eyebrows lifted.

"Are we clear?" Thanos asked firmly, voice getting louder.

"Yes, sir," you agreed, but Thanos could see that you didn't take him as seriously as he would have hoped.

As the rounds went by, you did stay with him and not go on your own ways. For that, Thanos was more than thankful. Since he had noticed that you kept following him, one round he didn't look so closely at your way anymore. He trusted that you were right behind him again, because the time was running out very, very quickly now and his team was struggling to find a free room. Thanos eventually did get into an empty room right at the last second.

Thanos turned around as the door had closed and locked itself, but when he saw a guy instead of you, his heart stopped. There were three players in the room with him, and none of them were you.

You had been right behind him, he had seen you. Barely two steps behind running and searching for a room with him. Thanos had been sure of it. But you weren't in the room now.

Thanos instantly ran to the gap of the door to peek out as the shootings started.

"Y/N!"

His heart was racing faster than ever before. Several people had been left outside, you included, and now their bodies were being carried into the black coffins tied with those fucking pink bows. It was too dark to recognise which body belonged to you.

Thanos leaned against the wall in disbelief. You couldn't be gone, that was impossible. You could survive anything. You had to.

He looked at his remaining team mates who were all staring at him. Nam-gyu, Se-mi and Gyeong-su, who looked at Thanos with the most terrified look out of all three.

Thanos stormed towards Gyeong-su and slammed him right against the wall, holding him captive by his shoulders.

"Where did you leave Y/N?!" Thanos shouted. "It was supposed to be Y/N!"

Nam-gyu had to pull Thanos away with a good amount of force so that he wouldn't start beating Gyeong-su up completely.

"Chill up, man," Nam-Gyu tried to calm Thanos down. "She probably found another room, don't get all heated up in the middle of the game."

Thanos took a deep breath and scrubbed his face with his hand in frustration. God he was angry - mostly at himself how he had let this happen just like that and not kept a closer eye on you. He should have held your hand to make sure you were there, but he knew you would have refused and only pulled your hand away.

For the next round, he didn't see you anywhere among the players. There were a lot left and he didn't go through the entire carousel because he had lost all hope. He was sure there was no way you could have survived finding a room in just a few seconds.

Thanos didn't say a word as he walked back with his team after the challenge was finished. Nam-gyu tried to talk to him but he didn't spare any attention on him at the moment.

Then, his heart stopped for a mere second when he saw you walking next to another player, having a conversation with her which Thanos couldn't hear. You laughed at something what player 120 said to you.

You were alive. He heard your laugh, which was always louder than many other people's laugh normally were. Thanos was frozen still for a few seconds, only looking towards you.

He was disappointed when he noticed that you kept your attention just on player 120 and didn't scan the room for Thanos as closely as Thanos did for you. But he didn't waste one moment longer until he stormed towards you with large and loud steps that made many other players around him to turn and look at him.

Thanos grabbed your hand without a warning and pulled you behind him towards the bathroom. You tried to yank your hand off but his grip was too tight.

"Su-bong," you said. "Su-bong, stop."

He didn't listen to you, only dragged you after him so fast you were about to trip soon.

"What the fuck, Y/N?" Thanos shouted when the door had closed. He didn't know if anyone was in the stalls right now and he didn't care.

"What?" you asked with brows furrowed, confused what Thanos was on right now.

"Don't you 'what' at me," Thanos spat, then pointing his finger at you. "What the fuck was that in the game?"

"What was?"

Thanos took a deep, frustrated breath in not to explode in total pieces in front of you.

"You didn't come to the room with me," Thanos said with a chuckle, though he found absolutely no part of this conversation funny. "You weren't in our room, Y/N. Why the fuck weren't you there?"

"I tripped," you shrugged. "You were gone already so i found another room."

You looked so indifferent and how this wasn't a big deal. You looked like you didn't care and it made Thanos even more enraged, fire building inside him unbearably hot.

Thanos laughed. Actually laughed. He didn't know where it came from because none of this was funny, but his emotions unfolded in uncontrollable laughter for a moment.

"Okay Thanos, what's going on?" you asked and crossed your arms. "I tripped, found a room and i'm now here."

"Don't you understand, Y/N?" he said in desperation, putting his arms on both of your shoulders. He had stopped laughing, his face completely serious and turning into anger and annoyance again. "You could have died!"

"Yes, Thanos, i know," you took your turn in laughing. "That's the point, they kill who lose-"

"But you could have been one of them!" he yelled at you, his face now only a few inches away from you. As he looked into your eyes, his wide eyes softened and his face relaxed more, voice turning a lot more quiet as well. "I could have lost you, Y/N. I was meant to protect you."

His hands moved upwards to cup your cheeks in their gentle hold.

"I can't watch you die," he said by barely a whisper. You leaned your face into his touch, a smile spreading on your lips. It annoyed Thanos. "What's so funny?"

"You like me," you stated with a grin. "Admit it, you like me."

Thanos huffed and rolled his eyes, letting go off you. He turned around to leave without another word.

"Come on, just say it," you said playfully, starting to follow his back. He gave you only silence and tried to ignore your finger drawing zigzag patterns on his back. "Come onnnnn, Su-bong. You like me, you like me, you like-"

He turned around in a mere second, stopping on his tracks so aprubtly that you bumped on his chest.

"I love you, Y/N!" Thanos shouted. "Don't you get that?"

Your eyes widened and so did his. The words weren't supposed to leave his lips like that, but you managed to press his buttons in a way to squeeze them out of him. You looked at each other, him sparing a quick glance at your lips.

Before either of you knew it, both of you leaned in towards each other and crashed your lips into a hungry kiss.

His arms were roaming all around your body, pulling you tightly against his body by your lower back. You had your arms wrapped around his neck, fingers brushing through his purple hair. His tongue forced your mouth open wider and was able to dig itself deeper to explore new parts of you.

Then, the door of one of the stalls opened slowly a few metres behind you, startling both of you out of the trance of savoring each other.

Min-su looked at both of you awkwardly, hint of pink on his cheeks, then quickly going to wash his hands and avoiding any eye contact with you. Neither you or Thanos moved during this time, not an inch besides of your heads to follow his movements. Your left hand was resting on his shoulder, your right fingers against the back of his neck. Thanos had his hands on your lower back.

Min-su glanced at you, both of you staring at him and waiting for him to leave, and then hurried out of the bathroom without another look. You and Thanos both burst out laughing at the same time.

"Oh my god," you mumbled and wiped a tear out of the corner of your eye.

Thanos put his finger on your chin, a smirk playing on his face.

"So, want to continue this," he suggested, trailing his tattooed finger along your lip and jawline, "somewhere more private, hm?"

You pushed his hand off.

"As if."

You were about to walk past him, but he grabbed your elbow and spun you around back to face him.

"So you're just going to leave me hanging like that, Y/N?" Thanos asked, eyebrows raised close to his hairline.

"Thanos, i'm not going to go to the damn stall with you."

Thanos grabbed your face into his hands, making you look at him. You thought he was going to kiss you again, but he only looked deep into your eyes.

"Y/N, i meant it," he said seriously. "I love you."

Your brows furrowed.

"I love you and i can't handle the feeling inside me when i even think that something bad might have happened to you," he explained with such a vulnerability in his voice you had never experienced before.

You looked at him seriously for a while, until you started to giggle.

"You loveee me," you teased.

"Shut up," Thanos mumbled, rolling his eyes, and turned his back to you.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulders from behind and rested your chin on his left shoulder, gently caressing his chest with your palm in a soothing and calming way like you were trying to calm down a child after a breakdown. He stayed still under your touch.

"I think i like you too," you admitted.

"Just 'like'?" he asked. "Like, a friend or what?"

"Well, i wouldn't want to have you die either," you admitted. "It would make me sad."

"Would you cry over me?" Thanos asked.

"I might. A little bit."

Thanos knew you didn't show your true emotions easily to others and especially didn't admit them with words. He had always known that you showed your emotions through actions, not through speech. It would be useless to force you confess 'i love you' back even if you did love him.

"Would you be okay if... you saw me with another woman?" he asked slowly. "Someone else kissing me like we did, hm?"

You were quiet for a moment, still standing behind him on your tiptoes in the same position, but now grabbed his cheeks with your hand, turning his face towards yours. Your faces were so close your noses were only an inch apart from each other.

"You're mine, you hear me?" you stated seriously with a stern voice, fingers pressing hard on his cheeks. "No other woman is going to touch you as long as i live, got it?"

Grin spread on Thanos' face.

"You likeee me," he mocked you with a smile, imitating you.

"I'll hit you if i have to," you threatened but kept your hold on his shoulders as gentle and relaxed as before.

"I know you've fallen so madly in love with me," he insisted.

"And how are you so sure about that?"

Thanos turned around to make your bodies face each other.

"Because when i do this," Thanos said and simply put his hands on your cheek and lower back, pulling you closer, "you get all flustered and you scrunch your nose like this," he explained, slightly scrunching his own nose. "And you get jealous."

"I don't get flustered," you refused, narrowing your eyes, but you could feel your cheeks getting warmer.

"I'll get you to admit it some day."

"Get over yourself."

☆☆☆

When it was time to finally go to sleep, you had just laid yourself on your bunk, until felt another presence behind you. You didn't have to turn around to see who it was.

"If you think i'm going to have sex with you right now, you're very much mistaken," you stated and turned your back to him. "Go to sleep, Thanos."

Thanos scooped over to lay on the bed on his side behind you.

"Who talked about sex?" Thanos asked, like the entire thing was a foreign concept to him. "I'm tired after the game too, you know."

"What are you doing?" you asked as he put his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to his body, your back against his chest.

"Getting a comfortable position to sleep."

You stretched your neck to look at Thanos over your shoulder.

"You planned to sleep here?"

"Obviously, señorita."

"Why?"

"Because that's what men do when they love a woman – or so i've heard."

"We're not a married couple, Su-bong."

"Do i have to fall on my knees to propose to you right now to make you shut up and accept me as your sleeping buddy?" Thanos asked, looking a little too serious that he'd actually do it if you kept resisting.

You eyed him for a moment until turned your head away from him back to rest on the pillow.

"If your hand wanders anywhere else than my waist i'll kick you to the floor," you stated seriously as you closed your eyes.

"Fair." Thanos lifted his head to plant a soft kiss on your temple. "Goodnight, grumpy princess."

"Gross."

"I know you love it."

[drdemonprince]

Hey, I don't know if you've any expertise or input on this, but I was wondering if you have thoughts on the intersection of being introverted/avoidant/socially anxious in personality and living in conservative, non-Western countries.

I see so much talk about sex positivity coming from Western commentators, and it just makes me so bitter as an introverted straight man approaching middle age, from South Asia, who has never had sex or been in a relationship and will likely never have it for the rest of his life.

So much of the advice I see online is geared towards Western cultures of dating and bars and cruising and what have you, which is either non-existent or niche here. It just makes me sad and feel so fucking lonely, and at times it makes me bitterly sex negative (which of course rebounds when the sensible part of me returns).

I feel robbed of something most people have, and I have no idea what I can do to change things as someone who gets incredibly anxious just being out of his house. It all feels frighteningly alone, and I find most people (rightfully) have little sympathy for a straight man who won't get laid.

Sorry there's not much to discuss here other than venting, but I thought maybe you might have a thing or two to say about it.

I don't have much that's helpful to say, it's gracious of you to message me in such good faith when so much of my writing is so American-centric as to have little relevance to your life. I understand that my way of life is so centered and catered to that it makes me an absolute fool about life nearly anywhere else in the world, so i won't pretend to have answers here.

I think in the broadest of ways that the same principle of putting yourself into novel and interesting social situations and practicing engaging with others you find interesting still applies. And I think there are probably pockets online where you can find people in your country who have more sexually progressive attitudes, are somewhat self-educated on matters of neurodiversity etc, and also feel really isolated and lonesome and desperate for more options. it might not be a ton of people, but it does not need to be. simply finding them and building spaces for you to interact (digitally or not) could help you feel a whole lot less broken and lacking in agency.

But from the sound of it you're starting from a really high degree of social anxiety and repression and you're going to need support in moving forward and you're going to have to start small. I think you need to have friends who can be there for you, and join you in going out into the world to meet new people (or building the digital equivalent). That may need to come before any real romantic/sexual prospect seems feasible for you.

Are there friends you can broach some of this stuff with? If not, are there people in your life who are kind to you that you could deepen your connections to by asking for support, taking an interest in their lives, joining them for things they like to do, and helping them out when they need help, too? A lot of the difficult work of socializing with people does transfer over into building romantic and sexual relationships. Working on making friends you can trust (and who see things somewhat the way that you do, or who are at least critical of things that you are in your country) can really help you feel less insane and alone.

And that is ultimately what all of us queer weird sluts are doing here in the US -- we are very much in the minority, though in cities we are lousy with options for socializing and have it comparatively very easy. It's still at its core a lonesome existence that we have to build spaces to cope with. You're really disadvantaged in that, but you can take steps to find people who are like minded, critical of the more repressive aspects of your culture or government, queer, freaky, have strange or nerdy interests, are disabled, etc, and slowly start to weave together a support network by engaging with them. there are never any guarantees that doing all of this will get you laid or that it will be good if it does, but this is the groundwork you can lay to make your social environment one that's better suited to you, and it will help, whatever little bit you can do.

Again I'm woefully out of my depth here, but I hope others with more relevant experience can also respond.

[fanfictiongirlie]

Marvel: Unplanned Final Chapter

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader (First person written though)

Description:

"It says...it says it's positive doll" His voice matching mine in a quiet shaky whisper.

"Fuck... I'm pregnant?"

"Yeah doll, you're pregnant"

"Fuck" I whisper.

Rating: Explicit

Chapter Warnings: Swearing. You might cry, I did.

Chapter Words: 6,363 

Hi, think of this chapter as a final thank you to everyone who read my little story, commented/reblogged/liked. Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed writing it.

As we walked away from the car, I held tightly onto Jamie's hand as she walked between Bucky and myself, she was five now, and we were walking her to her first day at school. Bucky walked beside her, holding onto her hand. My heart ached as we walked at the realisation that my little girl was getting older, but also I felt a small sense of pride at my girl. 

"Excited for school, Squirt?" Bucky asks. 

"I think so dada!" Jamie answers as she skips between us. She was wearing a simple pink dress with a denim jacket, and her hair was in a neat ponytail, she looked adorable. 

"You're gonna have fun, you'll make new friends and learn a lot of stuff" Bucky adds smiling down at her. 

"What will mama and you do when I'm at school?" She asks, stopping her skips for a moment. Bucky and I exchange a look. 

"We'll keep ourselves busy, don't you worry" Bucky says smiling "But don't worry, we'll come pick you up after school and you can tell us all about your first day"

I stop walking and crouch down to Jamie's level. "You will do great, you're so smart and so kind, remember that, okay?" I say softly, kissing her nose when I finish. We walk a little more and enter the playground, I noticed the teacher we had met a few weeks ago so I pointed over to them, showing Jamie where to go. 

"I love you" I say to her. "Love you mama!" She grins, she hugs Bucky quickly and runs off to her new classroom. I turned to face Bucky and notice his eyes were watering. 

"Don't start, I'll start" I say jabbing his arm. He wraps an arm around me and holds me close for a moment. "She'll be alright, doll"

"Should we wait in the car till she finishes?" I ask quietly. Bucky quirks an eyebrow, obviously amused by my response. "You want to just sit in the parking lot for six hours? You have any idea how boring that's gonna be?" He asks. 

"I can't bare the thought of her being there without us, it feels worse than nursery" I say quietly. Bucky pulls me into a comforting hug, holding close. "I know how you feel doll, I can't bare it either. But Jamie's strong, she's gonna be fine"

"I know" I whisper. Bucky then takes my hand in his metal one, holding me close as we leave the playground together. We walk back to the parking lot together and climb into the car. Bucky and I spend the next few hours doing menial tasks, trying to occupy time while Jamie was at school. Bucky takes me to a quaint café for a bite to eat and some coffee, he keeps me distracted by talking about various topics, from movies to future plans. 

A few hours later we were stood in the play ground again, Bucky stood next to me, one arm around my shoulder as we waited. The school building's bell ran, signalling the end of school. Students started filing out of the building. Bucky's hand grips my shoulder a little tighter as we wait for Jamie to emerge from the building. 

Jamie then runs from the classroom, giggling as she launches herself into Bucky's arms. Bucky grins, scooping Jamie up in his arms. He hugs her tightly, his smile widening at the sight of her being so enthusiastic. "Hey Squirt, how was your first day of 'big girl school'?"

"It was so fun dada! We made this!" Jamie says shoving a piece of paper in his face, I giggled softly as the paper was pressed into Bucky's face. From what I could see Jamie had doodled over it, three stick people, presumably the three of us, warming my heart. 

"Oh wow! Did you draw this?" Bucky asks. 

"Yes!" Jamie giggles, she climbs down from Bucky and moves to hug me. Bucky held the picture in his hand looking over it with a wide grin. "It's gorgeous, Jamie. I'm serious. I'm gonna frame it and hang it up, so I can look at it every day."

I grin happily and reach down picking Jamie up, holding her close to me. "Let's get you home, dada and I wanna hear all about your first day"

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

I frowned as I looked at my now eight year old, she was standing next to the wall she had obviously scribbled all over wall, making it her personal canvas. I sighed as I looked to Bucky, it was obvious his patience was at an all-time low as he stared down at Jamie. He had his arms crossed over his chest, a deep frown on his face as he started at the colourful masterpiece on the wall. 

"Jamie, you know this was naughty don't you?" I say calmly as I crouch to her height. Her bottom lip trembles as she looks from me to the wall and then back to me again. She avoids Bucky's gaze, knowing he was the one more unhappy right now, with a small voice, she replies. 

"I'm sorry..."

Bucky scoffs, shaking his head before speaking. His voice is deep and stern.

"That's not good enough, Squirt. You knew better than to draw on the walls. Especially that wall, where you know we have photographs and stuff on it."

I lean a little closer to Bucky, hoping it would calm him down. He was never good at this stuff, it was different in his time, parents would come down hard on their kids, and he didn't realise how hard he would come down. 

"Bucks, I think a time out will do, won't it?" I ask. He lets out a frustrated sigh, his eyes never leaving Jamie. 

"Time out. No television for the rest of the week, and no colouring either. You clearly can't handle it yet" He says sternly. I watch as Jamie starts crying a little, my heart breaks. 

"Aw Bucks, that's a bit harsh.. why don't we just say a ten minute time out and no colouring for a few days?" I ask quietly, Bucky shoots me a look, his tone hard and irritated. 

"Seriously? I think what I said was more than fair, Doll, I'm being generous. She knew better." He snaps at me, I watch him for a moment, deciding what I would do. He glances back at Jamie, who is looking up at him with wide, teary eyes.

"Right" I say sternly, I turn to Jamie for a moment "Go to your room girlie, we'll be in there in a moment" 

Jamie's lower lip trembles again, a few tears slipping down her cheeks as she looks up at Bucky and me, not wanting to leave. She glances at the wall for a quick second before nodding, her voice timid and shaky.

"O-okay..."

She turns to go to her room, her little footsteps quiet against the floor. Once she was in her room I turned to Bucky, a glare over my face aimed at him. 

"Yelling at me?" I ask, my voice hard as I spoke "Really?"

Bucky lets out an aggravated sigh, his gaze meeting mine. He shakes his head, his tone equally irritated as he speaks.

"You serious?" He asks me in a tone that reminds me of the days we used to hate one another. "She knows better than to do things like this" He snaps, pointing to the wall, covered in pink crayon squiggles. 

"Bucky, I understand that, but you yelled at me, in front of our daughter!" I snap back, I was frustrated at him. Yes Jamie was naughty, but he yelled at me in front of her. We promised to never yell in front of her. Bucky's irritation quickly dissolved into guilt. He rakes a hand through his hair, looking away from me, his voice softening.

"Yeah... I'm sorry, Doll. You're right. I shouldn't have yelled at you. Damn, I just got so pissed and-" He lets out a heavy sigh, clearly hating himself for the outburst in front of Jamie.

"You need to apologise to me" I say sternly, I wanted to hug him, tell him it was okay, but it wasn't, I wouldn't be yelled at. We were past that. Bucky's shoulders sag with shame, his jaw clenching as he looks down at the ground. His voice is soft and regretful as he replies. 

"I'm sorry, doll. I didn't mean to yell at you" He takes a hesitant step towards you, his hand raising to cup my face. I reach up cupping his hand, looking up into those perfect blue eyes. 

"I know darling, it happens again and I will make your life hell" I say with a sweet smile. Bucky lets out a shaky breath, he manages a weak smile as his thumb strokes my cheek slightly. 

"Noted" He says quietly, he pulls me into a hug, burying his face into my shoulder. 

"Now, go speak to your daughter, tell her you're sorry for yelling and speak to her like a human being" 

Bucky pulls back from my, and he takes my hand in his. "You're right...again...I'm sorry, I'll go talk to her right now" He presses a kiss to my cheek before releasing my hand and turning to Jamie's room. I followed him. Jamie was sitting on her small bed, her tiny legs swinging in the air as her hands fiddled with the edge of a stuffed animal. She looks up as the door opens, her eyes growing teary when she saw Bucky. 

"Squirt, can I talk to you for a minute?" 

"Yes dada" She answers sadly. Bucky walked further into the room, I walked in and leaned against the door frame, watching them. He crouched down and wrapped his arms around her small frame, pulling her into a side hug. 

"I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier, Squirt. I lost my temper, and I shouldn't have shouted at you like that, and I'm sorry I yelled at mama in front of you too"

"I'm sorry" She whispers "Uncle Loki told me it was okay to draw on the walls"

Bucky sighs, I copy, sighing too, of course it was Loki. 

"I can't wait to have a chat with Loki" I say quietly, a small smirk on my lips. Bucky chuckles and shakes his head as he glances at me. He looks back down at Jamie, using his fingers to gently tilt her head up, locking eyes with her. 

"Jamie, how about we forget about Loki for now...What you did was very naughty. You knew better than to draw on the walls, and you knew better than to listen to Loki. But I need you to understand that you have to remember and follow mama's and my rules. Can you do that for me?" He explains carefully. I smile softly, enjoying this side of Bucky much more than the one previously.  

"Yes daddy" She answers, a small smile on her lips now as he wipes her tears away. I watched as they cuddled close again, feeling left out, I walked over to them, sitting by Jamie and joining the hug. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

I rushed into the Avengers common room in search of Bucky. I found him, sitting with Steve on the couch. 

"Hey doll, you alright? What's the rush?"

"It happened" I say dramatically as I flop down onto his lap, causing him to let out a noise and Steve to laugh. Bucky wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close to him, I watched as he glanced to Steve for a moment and then back to me with curious, confused eyes. 

"What happened, doll? You gotta be more specific than 'it happened'?" 

"Jamie" I whine about our now ten year old. "She called me...'mum'!"

"Jamie called you mum? That's the big thing that happened?" He asked, a smirk on his lips. I rolled my eyes at him. 

"I'm mama! I've always been mama! Not mum!" I whine. 

Bucky chuckles at me, I could see in his eyes he thought I was adorable. He shook his head in amusement, as he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. 

"There's nothing wrong with being called mum, darling"

"Alright, we'll see how you feel when she calls you dad, no more dada, just dad "I say quietly. Bucky raises an eyebrow, giving a mock look of shock. He pretends to be offended, placing a hand over his chest and letting out an exaggerated gasp

"Just dad? No more dada? Oh, the horror!"

"I hate you" I mumble, I look up when the door opens, in walks Jamie, our ten year old, she was so tall, almost as tall as me now, her lovely brown hair flowed down her back, she didn't want to cut it. 

"Hey Squirt, perfect timing, we were just talking about you"

"Good for you" Jamie answers a little sarcastically, oh the sarcasm, her new thing. Bucky looks at me slyly, whispering just loud enough for me to hear. 

"She gets that attitude from you"

"Definitely from you" I mutter back. Bucky scoffs in mock offence, giving me a playful glare. 

"Hey that's not true. She gets it all from you, I'm a perfect, innocent angel" He argues. 

"Dad, you're definitely not an angel!" Jamie says, calling him dad, instead of dada for the first time, I watch him for his reaction. Bucky almost looks taken aback for a moment, his eyes growing wide with surprise. He stares at Jamie for a moment, obviously processing the change in address. 

"Did you just call me dad?" He asks. 

"Obviously, that's what you are" Jamie mutters as she sits down. Bucky frowns, he probably sees why I was sad earlier. 

"See" I mutter. Bucky gave a huff of displeasure, his expression one of annoyance. He looks over to me and rolls his eyes. 

"Yeah, yeah. Alright, point taken, it sucks" He mutters to me, he then turns to look at Jamie. "Hey, Squirt. Can I talk to you for a moment?" Jamie nods and moves to sit on Bucky's lap, squishing next to me. 

"Squirt, listen, you know you've always called me dada, right?"

"It's embarrassing, people at school take the mick because I call you mama and dada" She mumbles. 

"I understand that, Squirt, I get it...I just like it when you call us mama and dada, it's kind of like..." Bucky pauses for a moment. "Special, I guess"

"It's not like I call anyone else dad" She answers with a shrug. 

"I know, Squirt. And I'm not saying you have to keep calling me dada. If you wanna call me dad, that's fine. All I'm asking is that you don't stop calling me dada... Can you do that for me?"

"Fine...Can I go play on Uncle Tony's computer?" She asks. 

"Yeah, Squirt. You can go play on Uncle Tony's computer. Just make sure you don't delete any important files, or Stark will blow a fuse. And no playing those inappropriate games like last time." He says with a stern voice. Jamie nodded and rushed off, I snuggled a little closer to him. 

"See, I'm right, you're wrong" I giggle. He pokes my sides making me wiggle. 

"Oh shut it. You're right, I'm wrong. Are you happy now?"

"Always" I say, grinning.

"Smart arse"

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

It was the morning of Jamie's thirteenth birthday, Bucky and I were in the kitchen together, a coffee mug in our hands. I looked to him, bumping my hip against his. 

"How is it we have a teenager? Like we own a teenager!" I said.

Bucky sighed, shaking his head in disbelief. He leaned against the counter, looking at me with a mixture of nostalgia and mild panic. 

"God, I don't know...It feels like just yesterday she was learning to walk and now we're about to have a full-blown teenager on our hands. How did that happen so fast?"

"Ugh" I groan "I don't know, I don't like it"

Bucky chuckles lightly, nodding in agreement. "Me neither, doll. I'm not looking forward to the attitude and the boys..."

I groan as he finishes talking "I hadn't even thought of boys" I mutter.

"Yeah, well, might wanna start thinking about it. Teenage hormones and all that. She's gonna start noticing the boys soon, if she hasn't already."

"Oh she has, fictional boys! Like in her books! I don't want her liking real boys!" I whine. Bucky laughs, shaking his head in amusement. 

"Yeah, well, like I said, teenage hormones. It's only a matter of time, Doll. And when that happens, all we can do is pray for sanity and prepare ourselves for a rollercoaster"

"I hate how accepting you are about this.. you know what boys mean right?" I say quickly. Bucky grins, chuckling at my scepticism. 

"Doll. I'm happy because she's growing up, she's healthy, and she's becoming her own person. Sure, it's gonna be tough and sometimes we're gonna be ready to lock her in her room and never let her out, but..." He says shrugging. "I'm just happy that she's ours, that she's here and that we get to watch her grow up"

"I hate it when you're all smart and shit" I grumble. Bucky chuckles, his amusement clear as he grins at my reaction. He steps closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Oh yeah? You hate it when I make sense, huh?"

"Mmm yes" I grin, wrapping my arms around his neck. Bucky leans in, gently nuzzling my neck. He runs one hand up my back, the metal arm wrapping firmly my waist. He brings his mouth close to my ear, his voice low and playful as he speaks. 

"You really hate it when I'm being all rational and reasonable?" 

"No" I whisper. Bucky hums softly, his fingers trace idle patterns across my back as he tightens his grip around my waist. He leans in, capturing my lips in a light, gentle kiss before pulling away just enough to whisper, his lips brushing against mine. 

"Oh no? Seems like you're starting to enjoying it now, doll?"

"I'm enjoying you" I mumble, moving my lips to kiss along his jaw, his beard tickled my lips. 

"Mhm, keep saying things like that,, and I might start to think you actually like it when I'm being all smart and sensible" He whispers. 

"I miss when we used to hate each other, you just fucked me then, without question...now we've gotta talk" I whine playfully. Bucky moves, leaning his forehead against mine, his eyes glinting with playful challenge and a hint of desire. 

"Aw, you don't like talking? You'd rather just get straight to the good part?" 

"Please?" I whisper. Bucky's mouth curves up into a sly grin, his eyes darken with increasing desire, and his hands move to gently grip my hips. 

"Kiss me" I whine. 

"You're needy today. But who I am to deny the lady what she so desperately need?" He leans in, his lips meeting mine in a heated kiss. His hands slide to the small of my back, drawing me in closer against his body as he deepens the kiss, his tongue slipping into my mouth. Without breaking the kiss, he guides me backwards until I'm pinned between him and the counter, his body pressed closely against mine. 

"Ugh! Gross!" I heard Jamie whine, Bucky and I pulled apart at the sound of Jamie's voice, we shared an amused grins as we hold onto one another, still in a close embrace. 

"Oh come on, Squirt. Don't you like seeing your parents express their love for one another?" Bucky grins. I move away from Bucky and walk over to Jamie, I pull her into a close hug. 

"Happy birthday, baby girl" I say to her. Bucky chuckles, watching me and Jamie hug. He leans against the counter, still wearing a smile. He calls out playfully from across the room.

"Yeah, Happy Birthday, Squirt. You're officially a teenager now, so you and I will probably be butting heads sometime real soon."

"Better she argue with you than me, dad's real bad at winning arguments" I say as I giggle to my girl. Bucky rolls his eyes and pretends to look offended. 

"What? I win plenty of arguments, at least I think I do" He laughs, crossing his arms over his chest, his expression taking on a playful challenge. "You really wanna start this roll? Cause I can't argue with you right now" He says with a play wink. 

"Can you maybe keep your 'arguing' to when I'm not home?" Jamie mutters in a way that says she totally knew what Bucky was getting at. Bucky flushes slightly. I try to stifle a laugh but it's not use. 

"Ah, uh… right." Ahem "Sorry, Squirt. I'll keep the, uh, arguing...private."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

A year later, Jamie was fourteen, one evening she sat the two of us down in the living room, and paced in front of us. She obviously wanted to tell us something. 

"Alright, Squirt, what's going on?"

"You've got us all intrigued girlie" I say, smiling softly, having a small idea what this was about. Jamie stopped pacing, her face was bright red with a flush. 

"A boy asked me on a date" She mumbled. Bucky's face fell slightly, his overprotective nature rearing it's read. He straightened up on the couch, leaning forward slightly. He shared a worried look with me for a moment. 

"A boy? Who is this boy?" He asks, his voice serious and protective, I reach over placing a hand on his arm. 

"Oh Bucky cool it" I say to him, I then turn back to Jamie "Tell us about him, baby...Oh oh oh! Wait, is it the guy from your History class?" I ask excitedly, Jamie and I usually had girl nights and she told me about this boy, but told me to keep it a secret from Bucky. Bucky's initial serious expression turns slightly playful at my question. He raises an eyebrow, giving me a look that says, 'You knew about this?' He looks over at Jamie, his curiosity now definitely peaked, wondering if he's about to learn some new information regarding his teenage daughter's social life.

"There's a boy from your history class you didn't tell me about?"

"Its a girls thing" I answer with a shrug, as I share a grin with Jamie. "Well, is it?"

Jamie rolls her eyes, obviously exasperated by both of our eagerness but also seemingly amused. "Yeah mum, it's the boy from history class" She admits with a slightly blush on her cheeks. 

I squeal happily "I'm so happy for you girlie, when's the date, what's the plan? Also I want to meet this guy, and dad will drive you both to the date and pick you up okay?"

Jamie grins at my enthusiasm, her blush deepening as she giggles at my excitement. "Thanks, Mum." She turns to Bucky, giving him a look that says, 'You're in for it, old man.'

"The date is next weekend, we're gonna go bowling. And yes, Dad, you can drive us and pick us up."

A few hours later when Bucky and I crawled into bed, he wraps his arms around me, pulling me in closer, he presses a gentle kiss to my forehead. 

"I can't believe our girl has a date. I think I just aged twenty years"

"Careful old man, you're already what, one hundred and twenty?" I ask playfully, he rolls his eyes and nudges me gently. 

"Ha ha, very funny. I'll have you know I'm actually only one hundred and nineteen, thank you very much"

"Only" I snort. 

"You love giving me a hard time, don't you? You just can't resist teasing this old man, can you?"

"Nope, look they're only fourteen, what's the worse that could happen?" I ask. Bucky sighs, his overprotective nature coming through. 

"Well, I could list about a dozen worst-case scenarios right now, but I won't. I want our little girl to be safe and smart, you know?" He says quietly, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. 

"She's a smart kid, and they're going bowling, and you know Jamie, she knows what's right and wrong" I say, Bucky nods, acknowledging that I was right. 

"I know, I know. Jamie's a smart girl. I trust her judgment. It's just, I don't know, seeing her grow up so fast...I want to protect her" He pauses, letting out a sigh. "But you're right, it's just bowling. There's nothing to worry about...right?"

"The most that'll happen is our girl will get her first kiss" I say with a shrug. Bucky groans, rubbing his face with hand. 

"Ugh, I can't even...the idea of our little girl kissing some boy just...it doesn't sit well with me" He mutters. 

"He's a nice boy from what I've heard, nerdy type"

"A nerdy type huh? Oh, that's just swell. Now my little girl's gonna be making out with a geek in an alley while they discuss quantum physics or something." He wrinkles his nose, half-jokingly.

"Bucky" I say, giggling at his words. 

"What? I'm just saying, I didn't expect our daughter's first kiss to be with some dork who spends his free time building robots or something. I expected... I don't know, a cute jock, or maybe a charming bad boy."

"Oh I did, remember how obsessed she was with Peter when she was little? It was always gonna be a nerdy boy, Bucks"

Bucky chuckles, obviously remembering how Jamie would follow Peter around, always sit in his lap. 

"Oh yeah, that phase" He says with a sigh "Yeah, I guess you're right, better than a greasy bad boy, I suppose"

"Exactly, she's the opposite of me, I fell for the bad boy" I say with a giggle, moving slightly to kiss his jaw. Bucky laughs, a teasing glint in his eyes. 

"Oh, we're bringing up the past now, are we? Well then, I should remind you that you didn't just fall for any bad boy. You fell for me. The original bad boy"

"What makes you the original?" I ask with a smirk. 

"Because sweetheart, I was the first bad boy. The one that started it all. All these other "bad boys" today are just pale imitations of the original: me." He winks, his tone playful and confident.

"You're a dork" I answer, snuggling close, feeling a little sleepy. Bucky pulls me in close, nuzzling his face into my neck. 

"Oh, I'm your dork, and don't you forget it. You're stuck with me"

"Forever I hope" I answer in a yawn. His arms tighten just slightly around me. 

"Yeah, forever. No doubt about that, doll. We're in this thing for the long haul"

"Goodnight darling" I whisper. Bucky presses a soft kiss to my temple and starts to run his fingers through my hair. "Goodnight, dollface, sweet dreams"

The next day, Bucky and I waited in the living room for Jamie to finish school, the plan was she would bring Lucas, her date home with her, and then Bucky would drive the two of them to their bowling date. Bucky as usual was on edge, he was pacing back and forth in the living room, checking the time every few minutes. 

"Be nice" I warn him for the hundredth time. 

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be nice, I promise" He says as he rolls his eyes. 

Jamie finally walks through the door with a nervous looking boy behind her, it's funny, he kind of looks like how Peter looked at that age. 

"Hi, you must be Lucas" I say excitedly. Lucas, he boy, nods nervously, clearly feeling intimidated. 

"Yeah, uh, hi. It's nice to meet you"

I smile again and introduce myself to the boy "And this is Bucky, it's so nice to meet you!"

Lucas turns his gaze to Bucky and gulps slightly. He extends a hand cautiously, as if he's about to shake hands with a wild animals. He gives Bucky a polite nod. 

"Uh, hi Mr Barnes, it's...nice to meet you"

Bucky looks down at Lucas' extended hand, not immediately shaking it. He stares into Lucas' eyes, as if sizing him up. After what feels like an eternity, Bucky finally takes Lucas' hand and gives it a firm, slightly aggressive, shake. I move to slap Bucky's arm. 

"Be nice" I whisper. Bucky grumbles under his breath, then reluctantly releases Lucas' hand. He shoots me a sidelong glance, giving me a 'Really?' look. 

"Mum, could you help me in my room?" Jamie asks, her cheeks were flushed red. I nod and follow her to her bedroom, once we were inside I shut the door behind me. 

"What do I wear!" She cried. I wanted to laugh softly and bring her in close, but I didn't. I could coo over how cute my daughter was later. 

"Uhh so bowling, how about a cute pair of shorts?" I suggest. Jamie glances over to her dresser, considering the suggestion. 

"Yeah... okay" She answers, she sifts through her draws and grabs a cute pair of denim shorts, and a tank top. 

"How about these?" She asks. 

"They're cute, but maybe not the tank top?" I suggest gentle. Jamie ponders, then grabs a plaid flannel shirt instead of the tank top. 

"You're right, the tank top feels a bit too revealing for the first date"

"That's my smart girl" I grin. She quickly gets dressed and throws her hair up in a cute ponytail, she adjusts her outfit in the mirror.

"How do I look?"

"So beautiful darling" I whisper stepping behind her, I wrap my arms around her waist and hold her for a moment. 

"Thanks mama, I hope Lucas likes my outfit" She whispers, her blue eyes shining with worry. 

"If he doesn't, he's a fool" I say, kissing her cheek. Jamie grins, she takes a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves. 

"Yeah, you're right"

We walk back into the living room, I tell the kids to go wait in the car, before Bucky follows I grab the front of his shirt. 

"You be nice in that car, don't you embarrass our girl!" I warn, and once I finished being scary, I kissed his lips. Bucky raised his eyebrows, he places his hands on my hips, holding me close. 

"Relax, doll. I promise I'll behave. No embarrassing Jamie in front of the boyfriend, I've got this" He smirks, and pulls me closer, capturing my lips with a passionate kiss. 

"See you later" I mumble against his lips, feeling a little breathless. He lets go of me and leaves the house. I spend the next few hours relaxing until Bucky and Jamie come home. 

"Hey girlie, how was it?" I ask excitedly. Jamie grins, clearly excited. 

"It was great mum! Lucas is super funny and smart, and he's awful at bowling. We had so much fun!" She grins, I notice she looks tired as she yawns a little. 

"Aw baby girl, I'm so happy, go wash up for bed, okay?" I say smiling. Jamie nods, she hugs me and then disappears to her room, leaving Bucky and me alone. 

"The boy is a nerd, cute kid though. But he's definitely got his whole future mapped out, with Jamie included" He says taking a step closer to me. 

"Hey, if he's serious about our girl, she'll never experience heartbreak and I'm so okay with that" I answer warily. I'd rather my girl never get hurt by anyone. 

"Yeah, I suppose that's true. The boy definitely seems into her. I gave him the whole dad talk in the car...the if-you-hurt-my-daughter-I'll-break-you speech. And I must've seemed pretty convincing because, let's just say he nearly wet himself"

"Bucky" I scolded "I told you to behave!"

Bucky puts up his hands in defense, a lighthearted grin on his face. "Hey, I promised I'd behave, and I did. Mostly" He reaches out to me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me close to him. "Just wanted to make sure he understands the rules, doll. Can't have some punk kid messing with our girl"

I roll my eyes and laugh. I didn't want to admit he had a point, but also I felt bad for Lucas. Bucky was scary on good days. 

"Oh come on, you can't blame a guy for wanting to intimidate a random kid who's taking HIS little girl on a date. That's just paternal instinct" He says as he leans in, placing a soft kiss on my forehead. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

I felt my eyes burn with proud tears as I looked at Jamie, she was sixteen now. And all dressed up for her first ever prom. She looked so grown up it hurt my heart. Her dress made her look so grown up, and the heels, it was making me cry. 

"Looks like our little girl is nearly all grown up" He whispers to me. 

"She's beautiful" I whisper back as I take another picture.  Bucky nods in agreement, pride shining in his eyes. 

"Yeah she is. Beautiful and smart, and compassionate. Just like her mum" He glances at me, a hint of a smile on his lips. He reaches for me, wrapping his arm around my waist, giving it a squeeze. 

"Jamie baby, when is Luke getting here?" I ask about her boyfriend. They'd been boyfriend-girlfriend since they were both fourteen, and it was the sweetest thing ever. Jamie glances down at her phone, a mix of excitement and nerves on her face. 

"He should be here any minute mum, I can't believe this is actually happening, my first prom!"

"I know darling" I say happily. "Now remember our rules, no drinking, no drugs and definitely no after party"

Jamie rolls her eyes dramatically, but her voice is firm. "I know mum. You've told me like a million times. I get it, I'm not gonna do any of that, promise" There's a hint of playful defiance in her voice, beneath that, I can tell she takes my rules seriously. At least most of the time. 

"That's my girl" I whisper, moving to cup her cheek gently. Jamie smiles. 

"Thanks mama" She whispers back. A knock on the door signals the arrival of Jamie's date, and Jamie glances at Bucky. 

"Dad, can you get the door please?"

Bucky opens the door and in walks Luke, looking very smart, he usually looked smart, maybe a little disheveled. But today he was dressed in a black suit, and his hair was all neat. He looks both nervous and excited. 

"Lucas" Bucky greets him with a nod, his voice calm and authoritative. 

"You remember our rules?" I say to Luke. Lucas quickly nods, a look of slight intimidation in his eyes. 

"Yes, ma'am. No drinking, no drugs and no after parties. I swear" He answers as he straightens his suit jacket. 

"Okay!" I say happy with his answer. "Let me take some pictures and then you're free to go!"

Luke nods again, he moves to stand next to Jamie, he gives her a quick, nervous smile and Jamie blushes. My heart swells at how happy she looks. I smile widely and take a few pictures of the two of them. 

After a few photos, the pair leave for their prom, leaving me with wet eyes and Bucky not far off. Bucky turns to me, his expression a mix of nostalgia and affection. 

"She looks so grown up, doll. Our little girl, going to her first prom"

"It's going so fast" I whine a little, I step closer to him and wrap my arms around his middle. 

"I know doll, It seems like just yesterday she was a little toddler, running around the house causing trouble. Now she's all grown up, going to prom, dating some punk kid. Time sure flies" He says with a little sniffle. 

"It sure does...I'm glad we stopped hating one another, we would never of had this life if we kept arguing all the damn time" I say quietly, the arguments we used to have when we hated each other, before Jamie, such a faded memory now. 

"Yeah, thank god we got past our differences. If we hadn't, we wouldn't have had this amazing life together. This family, our beautiful daughter. I wouldn't trade it for anything"

"Neither would I, I love you, forever" I whisper, hugging him a little tighter. Bucky smiles softly, he moves to take my hand in his, he lifts my hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss on my skin. 

"I love you too, doll, more than anything" He whispers, his lips moving against my skin. "Forever and always"

Taglist:

@quinquinquincy @jaybbygrl @wintrsoldrluvr @sebastians-love @learisa @hi172826 @ravennablue @purplecolordeer @a-small-blue-nebula @buckitostan @knyaotjjkbiatch

[xelqua-the-jester]

Hi there 👋 I thought the little thing about your Creature Feature Au sounded cool and wanted to know of you had anymore info you wanted to share? I love it when people do messy timeline stuff and traveling between worlds and all that, makes my little lore brain happy (:

WAAA this ask made me smile so wide omg. I'd be more than happy to share more about it!!! (my apologies for the shortage been busy in life lol)

CREATURE FEATURE!

1.) Setting

It takes place in Hermitcraft Season 10 and Evolution, specifically during the midst of Watcher Obelisk trials. This AU does not contain Real Life or Wild Life as a part of its narrative (simply because of continuity / conflicting date reasons lol. Third Life - Secret Life are canon!). When Gem crosses over, it's basically like she's walking straight into a town going mad. The "portal" is actually a Watcher's Update Portal (the ones that the Evolutionists would use in order to jump from version to version). Nobody knows how it got to S10, but it sure isn't going.

2.) "Why Gem?"

Why not! Honestly, she just happened to be the first person I thought of when I was originally thinking about this AU and the pieces sorta started lining up soon thereafter. Considering her performance in Secret Life with raising the Boogeyman Army, her connection with the Watchers seemed like it would be strong enough for her to be the one to find this path.

3.) "Centaur...?"

YES!! I'm a huge fan of Hermit designs with fun and wacky headcanons. This AU is no different and follows a lot of the fanonly accepted tropes (Grian -> Bird/ Harpy Hybrid, Mumbo -> Vampire and/or Robot Hybrid, etc. I'll show off all my designs in due time LOL). That being said, these developments and hybrid changes are not present in the Evolution world. This is because of a few reasons. a.) As stated before, none of the Evolutionists have had these events occur to them yet. (Grian has yet to become a Watcher and gain his Watcher-like abilities, Pearl has yet to become "5 AM Pearl" and gain her moth-like abilities, Jimmy has yet to become "the Canary" and gain his bird-like abilities, (at this point) Martyn (and BigB in this AU) has yet to become Listeners and gain their Listener-like abilities). In Season 10, these events have already happened. b.) Due to being in such an early stage of humanity, Evolutionists haven't had the chance to literally evolve into these hybrid / abnormal beings, hence why they're all so surprised when a centaur shows up!

4.) "EVO!Martyn and EVO!Pearl. What's their deal?"

Well am I GLAD YOU ASKED!

In this AU (and in my own personal view of Evo), EVO!Pearl is a spy sent by the Watchers, specifically to keep EVO!Grian in line. Though not a Watcher, she does derive from the same plane as them, making her highly omniscient in the timeline of her life, including her future. Due to this fact, EVO!Pearl is aware that, at some point after Grian is taken by the Watchers, Grian creates the Life Series.

(Side tangent: In this AU, the Life Series is a seperate universe initially created by Grian, who does indeed have Watcher abilities at the time. After dying at the end of Third Life, however, he is greeted by the Watchers in the afterlife, who basically highjack the Life Series and starts taking control. They manipulate and force Grian to continue the games, even though he knows that it will only result in the cycle of watching his friends kill each other over and over and over again. As a way to try and compromise, Grian asked the Watchers to allow him to "split the universe", AKA live in another universe where his friends don't remember the Life Series (this universe being Hermitcraft) whenever the games weren't in session. The Watchers agreed but reminded Grian that the versions of his friends stuck in the Life Series universe will forever be tortured and exist in a limbo-like state in between the games (Eyes and Ears AU). This haunts Grian in modern day, but he pretends like it doesn't.)

EVO!Pearl resents Grian for the decision of creating the Life Series, considering the fact this means she is aware that he will eventually create a universe where she and all the friends she will make in the future will never escape a cycle of killing each other. This information drove EVO!Pearl basically insane, causing her to lash out towards the Evolutionists (Grian especially who, at the time, didn't even know what she was mad at him for) and distanced herself from them "out of safety". Eventually, EVO!Pearl goes missing entirely (but it doesn't stay that way once Gem starts coming along...)

EVO!Martyn has a similar tale, albeit a bit more complicated. At the end of EVO (which is when I believe Martyn becomes a Listener), he is also gifted with omniscience. It's a bit difficult to explain: Because end-of-EVO-Martyn has this ability, it retroactively makes AU-current-Martyn aware of his eventual fate. Unlike EVO!Pearl, EVO!Martyn is practically unbothered by this knowledge. Knowing that there is a future in which he wins with such glory! (Limited Life) Knowing that, someday, he will fight to bring down the Watchers that currently terrorize his town! It makes him PROUD! There's no shame in what the future holds for him. In fact, he makes jokes with/towards EVO!Grian about murder & betrayal frequently, something that angered EVO!Pearl prior to her disappearance. Simply put: He did not care!

("What about BigB?" because BigB's relationship with the Watchers doesn't start to truly bloom until the Life Series starts up (in a different universe entirely), he does not have the same retroactive powers (in the EVO timeline, at least).)

5.) "...So EVO!Grian and EVO!Jimmy don't know about the Life Series?"

Nope! Not at this point. Though Grian gains omniscience, he does not gain the retroactive abilities of a Listener, like Martyn. In fact, Hermit!Grian struggles to remember much of his time as an Evolutionist at all due to the fact the Watchers screwed him over so bad when they took him. Jimmy's situation matches BigB's, in which his connection with the Watchers started in an alternative universe, so he has no connection to it during his time as an Evolutionist.

6.) "How can Hermit!Pearl remember EVO, but not the Life Series?"

More Watcher manipulation babyeeee. Because Hermit!Pearl lives in a world where she does not remember the Life Series, her "memories" of Evo are warped. Though she knows she was (and still is) a spy for the Watchers, she has no recollection of ever getting "going crazy" (basically, she remembers EVO as how it actually happened OUTSIDE of this AU lol). Hermit!Grian knows that Hermit!Pearl doesn't remember the Life Series and does his best to prevent her from ever figuring it out due to the fact he fears that, if she were to learn about the fate of herself in the next universe over, it would trigger basically a sleeper agent emotion in her and cause her to end up like how EVO!Pearl did. And Grian does not want to see that happen again.

WOW that was a lot. I've been typing for at least an hour now LMAO

I could ramble about Creature Feature forever, honestly. I'm so grateful to hear that other people seem to be interested in it! If there's any more questions or comments on the AU, please don't hesitate to jump into my inbox!! I'm always so happy to answer them!! 💜

[greensagephase]

Hiii, pooks! Yes, I see that in your recent ask with more art it states he's a kingpin variant, which I find so interesting! Also, I love that he's still a very sassy man despite being strict, hehe!

Second, oooh!! I love how you changed it to Miguel being the one who created rapture! You don't have to answer, but this just brings other questions to mind (I'm so intrigued by the lore 🤭🤭), like whether he has produced the drug to spread it all over, the way it's canonically a known and abused drug in Spider-Man 2099's universe? Or, is Tyler the one who starts producing it once Miguel creates it? But anyway... Tyler... 😒 I'm glad to hear mafia Miguel gets his revenge (we hate Tyler in this house!). Also, is Tyler still his bio dad in this AU? I know I'm asking too much stuff, I'm sorry 😭 but I swear it's because I'm curious. If you wrote a fanfic or lore post, I'd read it, but eeee! So mans becomes a villain after this - I feel him (honestly it brings to my mind how our og Miguel doesn't become a villain after everything he goes through 🥲)!😌 Also, another question on his senses being enhanced, for research purposes...🤭 Is he stronger than the average human man because of rapture? I'm thinking about how for Kira, her suit is what gives her her strength (I remember you telling me that some time ago), so... 🤭🤭 Asking for a friend. 😌

About his scar, I got you :)) I initially thought about that, but then thought about Kira giving it to him, haha, and him wearing it proudly because she gave it to him.🤭🤭 But it definitely symbolizes the violence he has experienced as a mafia boss. I genuinely love that detail for that, showing he hasn't gone unscathed and it's not easy being in that world. I think that's important because sometimes in these kind of stories the characters don't have any kind of scars or haven't experienced personal losses, which makes it unrealistic as that type of life is a highly dangerous and unstable one. But EEE, Kira is going to make him HURT, hm? We love the angst!😭

And aww, pooks, of course! As I said, if you wrote a fanfic or something of the sorts explaining everything, I'd DEVOUR it! 🥰🥰

ALSO, IT'S IN MY INBOX, POOKS!! As soon as I saw it, I was B U Z Z I N G -- Like, every time I see it, I feel like I'm about to magically learn how to do somersaults because of it, but hear me out! I didn't want to ignore your previous asks.😭 I always try to answer asks as they are sent, like in the order they come in because I don't want anyone who has sent asks before to see that I'm answering some asks before theirs when it's noticeable that I skipped theirs. Like, say when I update a fic or write something and I get an ask about that specifically. The previous asker would know I skipped their ask, which was sent a day or so before I made an update, you know? Or, in your case, you'd know I skipped 3 of your asks to get to the NC art one. I'd never want to make you feel like I don't care about your other asks non-related to NC,🥺so I try to be fair :)) I will be skipping the one about the drabble of Miguel and Dulzura kissing under the mistletoe, so I can work on it! But only because it involves writing, so the next ask will be about the NC art and GIRL! *SCREECHES* 🤭🤭I will save my reaction for the ask :))

🤭

Hiii, Lara pooks!! 🥰 I’m finally answering this ask that’s also been in my inbox since December (I’m sorry).

Not one, not two, but THREE works! I’m honored! May I say that the first one made me giggle because of how sassy he is? “Ya. The only problem? It’s a shitty plan!” I love this sassy mafia man! Also, God, he looks so good while telling whoever he’s talking to about their bad plan.

Okay, so when I first saw this ask, the second drawing on the bottom half of the first panel got me like??? 👀👀 Because I had noticed the green eyes in the previous ask from the half of the drawing comparing 25yr old and 35yr old Miguel. When I first saw the first ask, I thought maybe you were playing around with the eye color (green), and then you dropped this ask and I was like, “WAIT! This is actually a thing” when I saw that this Miguel has green eyes. And now you’ve revealed that he discovered rapture (in the latest ask you’ve sent, which I have yet to answer. I’m so behind with notifications🫠), so now I have questions that hopefully you’ll answer in future art! So, 25-year-old Miguel was working at a lab and he discovered rapture… And that’s why now in his mafia era, Miguel has green eyes! Did he take it willingly, or did something go wrong? And if he did take it willingly, why? How did he go from a geneticist to a mafia don? I have questions, Lara, and I hope we learn more in the future! 😭 🙏🏼

Also, I love the second panel so much! I love how I can tell 35-year-old Miguel looks so much more mature, not only by the white streaks of hair, but also in his face lines. Mwah! I loved that detail, and I need 35-year-old Miguel in my life, like yesterday, please!

I’m not gonna lie, the last panel had me barki- I mean, screaming! The way he’s sitting there, so powerful and handsome? Bout to ask if his lap is taken, or if I may take a seat. 😩 The hair? Sir, please, let me just run my fingers through it! Also! I hadn’t noticed mans has a scar on his eyebrow?! It’s only because of this colored drawing that I realize it’s a scar, and not like, something he decided to do to his eyebrow for himself (you know how some people specifically shave a line off?). Now I’m curious how he got it! Was it Kira? 🤭 Also, the way the light makes his eyes look so pretty?? I wanna gaze into them forever. 🥺

Aughhhh, Lara! Your art! You’re always cooking, and I thank you for that and also for continuing to share your OC and variant Miguel’s lore. It always inspires me to work more on my own, but I never do lol. 💀Maybe in the future! But, thank you once again for sharing your art with me! 🥹 I’m going to hopefully answer the rest of your asks this week. I was hoping to answer more this weekend, but I started feeling under the weather on Saturday. Anyway, feeling alright now, so I should be able to answer my asks and catch up.

I hope you had a wonderful weekend, pooks!💖

Alondra❤️

[that-ineffable-devil]

Edwin: *bitchily but academically expresses that astrology is bullshit*

Monty: Capricorn?

Me: Fuck don't @ me like this damn

[californiaquail]

anyone else feeling fundamentally incapable of adjusting to society. also just discovered there's a 30 tag limit which i can't believe i've never hit before

[tackrusso]

show tempe gang crossover with the morris islanders would actually have been the best episode of bones ever. btw

[theintelligentfool]

im so sick of embarrassment and anxiety being kind of in control of ?my entire life? at this point

[the-midnight-stage]

"am I technically writing non-sexual subspace?" and other things I ask myself while writing this fic

[ravenwolfie97]

how do i get a cool artist to work with me so they can draw my characters better than i can aaaaaaaaa

[longagoitwastuesday]

Going through the Utahim.e tag had me checking several times if at some point I had clicked on the G.ojo/Utahim.e one instead

[attractthecrows]

retconning stroud out of the deep roads so i can shove laure amell and the hawke siblings and varric and anders all into the same little camp. they would all have such a bad time

[fragglerockopinions]

The worst thing about suffering is that it still hurts when the danger is over but no one cares about it anymore because it shouldn't hurt. No one will ever say "I'm sorry that happened to you" especially when they barely say "I'm sorry that's happening."

[vulpinesaint]

absolutely unreasonable over this coworker that i rlly like rn. thank god i don't like men or i would have fucking Lost it by now! as it is i don't even know what has me so dkfjghsdf about him i'm just sitting there with my head in my hands going "he's so normal about trans people..."