#I don't have a favorite I promise

[shikariiin]

5/5!!!!

I give u himbo

[kala-mies]

The lizard is a worthy ally.

[kasterarts]

Moving Forward. (Spoilers for YTTD up through 3-1b)

[starcurtain]

I wish everyone collectively understood aventurine’s character like you…things would be so much easier! I genuinely don’t understand how people keep getting his motivations wrong??? Could it be because some of the most popular Aven fanfics were written prior to his release? That could have contributed to some of the takes we tend to see about him…thoughts?

I struggled all day to come up with a concise way to answer this and couldn't think of one, so here, have a long-winded ramble:

I don't think early fic writers have much impact in the situation with Aventurine's character now, since most people can look at when a story was posted and go "Oh, this was before we had ____ information."

I think that Aventurine's problem is being a male character in a gacha game. Gacha game characters are designed to sell. Hoyo can sell female characters very, very easily. Give her huge tits and a visible underwear strap and you're good to go. I love all my guy friends, but I'm not gonna sugarcoat it: straight men are not the hardest audience to please. Hit a particular fetish (feet, spandex, dommy mommy), and you're gucci.

Nah, we all know why Jade's trailer is Like That.™

Male characters in gacha are harder to sell because women as consumers are a little harder to predict. Does every woman want a tall, ripped hunk? Shit, no, small cute boyish models like Aventurine are selling better now? Why?! Would a bad boy be more popular than a nice guy??? It's harder to account for women's tastes, especially because they are often (a little) less visually-oriented.

Hoyo is good at what they do though, and they've figured out that male characters sell very well when they possess at least one of two specific traits:

Endearing vulnerability/helplessness

Gay ship tease

Give a character both, like Aventurine? They might as well be printing money.

That sound you hear is Hoyo's stock prices rising.

So, from the very beginning, Hoyo is incentivized to create a character that appeals to people, a character people will want to crack their wallets open for. And they achieved this, first and foremost, by giving Aventurine traits that female players (in particular, but men too), find especially appealing: emotional and physical vulnerability.

We see Aventurine's pain. We sympathize with his grief. We identify with his struggle to make meaning of his difficult life. He's our woobie, blorbo, babygirl, whatever the hell they're calling it now.

He can't hide his suffering anymore. He's on the very edge. He's a dude in distress. He's surrounded by enemies! He misses his mama! He's been betrayed! No one understands him like you do, dear player!

The ultimate feeling evoked is: He needs to be saved.

When people talk about male power fantasies, I think they forget that women can experience them too, and "Emotionally vulnerable man that only I (or my favorite character) can fix" is actually a female power fantasy.

And from there it's really easy, right: the people who shell out cash to buy warps for their harmed-husbando feel like they've saved him; the people who are into mlm ships look for the nearest hot dude to be the savior Ratio was waiting for his time lol.

Morally and intellectually, this type of deep-down-golden-hearted, emotionally-wounded male character is very easy to digest. There is nothing to dislike about this type of character or role in the story: this character is a good guy who has just gone through so many terrible situations, whose victim status makes him endearing, and whose lack of agency means that any of the questionable or downright bad things he does are always the result of someone else forcing his hand, and never something he would have chosen himself.

His motivations are always clear and consistent: get free, heal, and live happily ever after.

Insert the Wreck-It Ralph meme: "Do people assume all your problems got solved when a big strong man showed up?" But to be fair, a big strong man did kind of solve Aventurine's problem, so--

Anyway, it's simple. It's straightforward. Morally, it's pretty cut and dry, black and white: Aventurine is our hero, which means everyone dictating the course of his miserable life is evil.

Hoyo is not remotely discouraging people from literally buying into this emotional appeal.

And trust me, I get it. I'll be the first to admit that hurt-comfort is its own entire genre in fandom because it is so appealing. People eat up Aventurine's tragic backstory like candy! The idea of watching a character go through hell at the hands of bad guys just to finally find a happy end is like the definition of everyone's favorite story.

In fact... people love Aventurine's suffering so much, they have invented whole new ways for him to suffer that aren't even in the game.

This is where we get all the headcanons that Aventurine was a sex slave, every single person he meets hates him because of his race, the Stonehearts are executioners holding knives to his throat, Jade enslaved him to the IPC with a lifelong contract, his material possessions belong to the company, the IPC is forcing him to take only the most dangerous missions where he is being required by his evil jailers to continually put his life on the line... You name it and I promise you, I can find a fanfic where Aventurine suffers from it. 😂

Bro can't even sleep in on his day off; life is so hard for this man.

Being serious: if the game is telling us that Aventurine is a victim... Why not make him the perfect victim?

Why not envision an Aventurine with no freedom, who bears no responsibility for any of the horrible situations he is in or any of the dubious things he does?

It's so natural to like that version of Aventurine, so appealing to see a totally powerless underdog use his own wits and charms to claw his way up to freedom. Or, if you're the kind who really relishes angst: It's even appealing to see Aventurine lose more. To delight in fics where he loses his wealth, where the IPC punishes him for past crimes while he's powerless to stop them... (I assure you, this is many people's cup of tea and the fanfics prove it!)

Ultimately, there's nothing wrong with liking characters who are exactly this straightforward! It's completely fine to embrace characters that are intentionally written to be morally above-board, whose primary role in the story is to generate angst by being a good person who suffers, or those characters who never show unlikable traits, bad decisions, or contradictory actions.

The problem is that that's just not who the game is telling us Aventurine is.

Hoyo may be capitalizing off people who love to envision poor Aventurine still living his life as a slave... But the game also needs to tell a complicated enough story overall to appeal to people who don't care about this specific husbando--Aventurine's role in the actual game's plot has to be interesting enough for almost everyone to appreciate it, not just Aventurine's simp squad. (Don't get mad, I'm in the simp squad with you.)

So his character doesn't stop at just being a pure-hearted victim who is still waiting to be saved.

Aventurine is not that easy to label, and I think the biggest struggle in this character's fandom right now is between people who prefer the even-more-angsty, still-a-slave Aventurine versus people who want a morally grey, self-destructive character instead.

To me personally, while I greatly understand the appeal of fanon!Aventurine and the joy of a really juicy angst fic where characters lose it all, I think that missing out on the depth that canon is suggesting would be a real loss on the fandom's part.

The character motivations that Aventurine shows in the game are complicated. They cancel each other out. They're basically self-harm! He makes almost every situation he's in worse for himself--on purpose.

He is a good person, but also a person who has done unspeakable things. He does have morals, but he's not above allowing those who don't have them to use him to their advantage.

He's both the victim and the victor. He's his own worst enemy. He's a lost little boy who's been making terrible decisions for himself since he was like eight years old, and a grown ass man who is barely managing to fake his way through an existence that destiny is not letting him quit.

This kind of character is a lot harder to embrace. He's done things that most people would find appalling--like willingly joining up with the organization that let his entire race be massacred. He's invented a whole new peacock persona to frivolously flaunt riches he doesn't even care about (Poison Dart Frog Self-Defense 101). He actively plays into racist stereotypes about his people to manipulate others through their preconceived expectations. He's made a mockery of his mother's and sister's hopes and dreams by endlessly trying to throw his own life away.

He has flaws! He bet everything he had on a ploy without doing his homework to find out if the people he was risking his life for were even still around. (Maybe he already knew, and couldn't bear to admit it, even to himself.) He's intentionally off-putting and obnoxious to everyone he meets (Poison Dart Frog Self-Defense 102). He terrifies everyone who gets close to him by (seemingly) carelessly throwing himself into the jaws of death without the slightest provocation.

He knowingly allows the IPC to exploit his power and talents for profit. Did everyone forget that his role in the Strategic Investment Department is asset liquidation?! Like, his actual day-to-day job is ruining people's lives. Canonically, Aventurine kills people when his deals go bad.

His motivations change off-screen in two lines of story text. We're told in one line that his biggest reason for joining the IPC was to make money to save the Avgin, then in the next line we find out that's impossible. And... then what? What motivations does he even have now? The whole point of his character arc from 2.0-2.1 is that he was on the edge of giving in to utter despair and nihilism because he couldn't even perceive a single reason to stay alive. He has no purpose in life before Penacony, and that didn't start with the Stonehearts at all??

People keep saying Aventurine was held in the IPC by golden handcuffs, but how do you tie down someone for whom profit is meaningless? What can you offer to a man whose only desire is to bring back something already lost forever? How do you imprison someone whose only definition of freedom is, canonically, death?

Working for the Stonehearts is obviously not healthy. But that's why Aventurine was doing it--because taking dangerous missions allowed him to put himself at risk. The job that he originally pursued hoping to save his people became a direct means to self-harm, and the IPC's only real role in that was just happily profiting off the results.

The journal entries for Aventurine's quests are there deliberately to tell the player what is on his mind, and none of it has to do with escaping from his job:

Like... Work is the least of this man's problems.

At really the risk of rambling on too long now, he's also just a massive walking contradiction:

Aventurine is among the most explicitly religious characters in the game, yet he's one of the only people in the entire game that we have ever seen actively question his people's aeon.

You might be tempted to think Aventurine's risky gambles with his life as an adult are a result of giving up after finding out about the Avgin massacre... Butttt no, Hoyo makes sure to tell us that even at knee-high in the Sigonian desert, Kakavasha was already willing to risk himself in a fight to the death against monsters because even back then he found his own life to have less value than a single memento.

He's the "chosen one" who will lead his people to prosperity... except they're all dead.

He's explicitly suicidal... andddd also a pathstrider of Preservation.

He wants to die... He doesn't want to die. He wants to make it end, yet goes to staggering lengths to continually survive. (Every plan risks his life on purpose--but every plan's win condition is also to live.) He life is the chip tossed down, but his hand is trembling beneath the table. When faced with an otherwise unsurvivable situation, Aventurine literally became a winner of the Hunger Games. He beat other innocent people to death with his own chain-bound hands just to come out alive.

He knows the IPC failed the Avgin and left them to die... and he still willingly sought out a position of power in their organization. Maybe he really is after revenge... but maybe not.

He starts his journey in the IPC with a truly noble goal in mind: to help his people using his newfound wealth and power. He's a good guy who did genuinely want to save the Avgin and repay all those who helped him. But once it became clear he was too late, once it was obvious he would have no use at all for that monetary wealth and power he risked his life to get... What did he do with it? Unlike Jade, we don't see him over here donating to orphanages. (I'm not that heartless; I'm sure he does actually do a lot of good things with his money on the side, but the point is that the game does not show us that--it shows us, over and over again, Aventurine putting on a wasteful, over-indulgent persona toward wealth. We've supposed to feel how meaningless money is to him, how meaningless everything is becoming to him.)

He outright refuses to use underhanded tactics or to cheat at gambles, which is meant to show us that's he's more morally upright than his coworkers. There's an entire exchange where he says that he'll never stoop to using manipulation the way Opal does. But... he doesn't have any issue fulfilling Opal's exact agenda. He was never remotely morally conflicted about denying the Penaconians their freedom by dragging Penacony back under IPC control.

He's willing to risk his own life, which is one thing--but he's also willing to risk other people's well-being. Topaz accuses him of constantly egging their clients on into dangerous situations; we've actively seen him shove a gun into Ratio's hands and pull the trigger with no care for how Ratio would feel about that on their very first meeting... Dragging the Astral Express crew into the entire Penacony plan in the first place was exceedingly dangerous...

To me, I just think it's vital to understand his character through the lens of these contradictions because they demonstrate the extreme polarity of Aventurine's life: from rags to riches, from powerless to empowered by multiple aeons, from willing to kill to survive to killing himself... He has quite literally lived a life of "all or nothing," and while he is the victim of many terrible situations out of his control, his arc as a character involves facing the truth of himself and the future his own actions are hurtling him toward.

Frankly, the Aventurine that canon is suggesting is a little annoying. You want to grab him by the shoulders, shake him, and say "Why are you like this?!" And he won't even have an answer for you, because he doesn't even know why he's still alive.

In the end, to me, this is so, so much more interesting. I can read an endless supply of hurt-comfort fics where Aventurine escapes the evil IPC and Ratio is there to fill the void in his life with the power of love and catcakes and be a perfectly happy clam online, but I want canon to continue to serve us this incredible mess of a man who constantly takes one step forward and two steps back.

Who is fully aware of his role as a cog in the grotesque profit-wheel of cosmic capitalism and still manages to say he never changed from the rags-wearing desert rat of the Sigonian wastes.

Who over and over again flirts with nihility but, ultimately, even if he has to wrest it from the grip of the gods themselves with bloody, chain-bound hands, chooses life.

[mercymaker]

BALDUR’S GATE 3 ▸My Original Characters (insp. by @onewingedangels)

[r-aindr0p]

oh oh since you like priests, have you seen sunday from honkai star rail? he's like a fucked up angel bird priest who ppl repent their sins to, i think you'd like him! (his sister is v v cute too)

Him ??? Yea I really like him and his sister's design !! I do play the game (when I take the time to bc I have many gachas on my phone so it's hard to get organized :") ) Has his banner been up yet ?? I hope not I'll try to get rolls in stock for him afehdzj I love angel and/or priest-coded character so much eee

[genericpuff]

vent post

[rynli]

me: I should write the one-shot that lives in my head about Harry applying for a job

brain: you will write a whole casefic about Harry realizing being a cop already killed him once, acab applies even to Kim, and he needs to quit if he wants to get better

[worldunbent]

chapter notes - matoba seiji

a compilation of all of midorikawa's chapter notes concerning matoba (as of volume 29)

all are from the official viz releases, translated by lillian olsen.

Chapters 23 - 26 - Inhuman Thing I didn't have a chance to write a story about Matoba until now due to page constraints or manga cycling issues in the magazine. I had fun when I finally got around to it. Matoba's appearance means Natori's hardships become more obvious. Natori settled upon his current philosophy after a lot of reflection. But then he sees Natsume wrestling with the same choices and slogging through the same place he used to be, and it's both amusing and frustrating at the same time for him. Natsume might realize this and not be able to presume so much on his kindness. Natsume and Natori are left with a problem, so l hope to take my time drawing them dealing with it.

Volume 9 (General afterword) I enjoyed drawing a bit about Matoba. He has several titles. He’s the organizer of the assembly of exorcists, so he’s called “Chairman” during the meetings. He’s the young head of the family from a regular human perspective, and known as the leader of his clan to yokai. Natsume has been more relaxed lately, so it’s very fun to draw something tense like this once in a while. I’d like to write thoroughly about exorcists some time when I have the opportunity. Seeing Matoba and Natori side by side here, they’re clearly eccentrics. I’m relieved that Natsume seems normal by comparison.

Chapters 52 - 54 - Behind the Chains Natsume is now able to face a variety of things. But I also feel that the distance between him and Natori grows each time they encounter one another. They see the same things and hope for the same outcome, but because their paths are a little different, it's hard for them to take action when they're together. It's a strange feeling. I'm sure Natori wants to remain Natsume's ally, and Natsume wants the same with Natori. I'm happy I got to draw more about Matoba, too. Whereas Natori tries to do what's right and is afraid of making a mistake, I think Matoba is the kind of person who doesn't fear making mistakes.

Chapter 77 - The Two Rings This was another story I had always wanted to do, but the timing never worked out, so I was very happy to get to it now. When I'm drawing Natsume, I always agonize over his dialogue and pick his words carefully. But when I'm drawing the Matoba clan, I don't have to think about the impression they're making, and I just use words that pop up in my head. Mr. Natori is somewhere in between. It's always a bit refreshing to draw the exorcists. I hope people form their opinions of Mr. Matoba based on what's on the page. In good ways and bad, he's a character who lies but is also uninhibited.

Special Episode 17 - A Hand Extended They let me do another episode of Natori as a high school student. There was another anecdote I wanted to include, but it wouldn't fit, no matter how hard I tried to rearrange things. Still, I'm happy I could depict more of Natori and Matoba's relationship. Sometimes you can't come to an understanding with a person, but once you become aware of your own feelings, you can often begin to be more objective. Then you start to see aspects of the person that change your mind, which is natural. But unlike Natsume, Natori can be stubborn and won't allow his feelings to change. It was interesting to see how Natori would feel about the aloof and unwavering Matoba.

Special Episode 19 - An Abandoned Station in the Rain With 16 pages, the plot could have felt too similar to other Special Episodes, so I decided to do a simple story just about running into someone unexpected. It was fun showing Matoba being himself. Mr. Matoba knows yokai who live in a slightly different world from the one Natsume knows, and Nyanko Sensei knows both worlds. I'd like to do more stories about the two of them.

Chapters 92 - 94 - The House of Promises I have a memory of some boys climbing the gate of the town hall to pick some loquats at the end of spring and getting scolded. I made it seem like spring when the chapter appeared in the magazine, but then I heard that loquats ripen in early summer, so my older sister helped me race to redraw the clothing into something more summery before the graphic novel release. I enjoyed drawing the exorcists. Mr. Natori just can't catch a break and Mr. Matoba has many things going for him, but he often gets shut out. They don't really get along, and they're skeptical of each other even when real empathy is extended. Natsume is always at least trying to listen, so conversations are easier with him present. No matter what, Mr. Natori is older, and Mr. Matoba is younger. End of story. When I include the exorcists, there are all these dilemmas and convolutions that make things complicated and fun to draw. It feels fresh to me. I get nostalgic for the first time Natsume and Mr. Natori met when they're together. Their bond is getting deeper, but it was easier before for Mr. Natori to casually invite Natsume on outings. When you know someone a long time, there are more things to say, but sometimes, just as many things remain unsaid.

Chapters 103 - 104 - Where Vessels Lie in Slumber* I was so happy to work on a longer story for once. My head starts filling up with what to do next while I'm still working on the current episode. when I'm in one-shot mode. But being able to linger on a story arc reminded me of the excitement I felt back when I first wanted to be a manga artist. I still have a lot of storylines I'd prefer not to cut short, so I hope I get more opportunities like this. I've wanted to do this particular story for a long time, but. I feel like it could only be done now because of how Natsume's currently feeling. I hope you can pick up on how Natori and Matoba's relationship changes subtly depending on the situation, and that you get a feel for their solidarity as exorcist peers. It was so fun drawing everything I wanted to include: Natsume's faith in his friends; Natori's belief that he can still offer help even as an exorcist; Matoba, who's sometimes prevented from action because he knows and sees too much; Tanuma, who's surely able to help, but is unable to accompany Natsume; the cats protecting their secret; Nyanko Sensei. And of course there were even more things I wanted to expand on, so I'll take my time working them out.

*The first three chapters of this arc are in the previous volume and there's not enough in the other note for me to include.

[backpackingspace]

LISTEN I hope telemachus tries to lean on Athena every single time she shows up. It NEVER works. but he still tries. Because he loves her.

[nounpolycule]

The problem with using "Rose being immortal would be more sad in the end, not less sad" as a gotcha regarding immortal!Rose fics is that that makes it better. Sorry. I am a tragedy enjoyer. Give me Rose refusing to go back to Earth for a century because the last time she saw Mickey, he had some grey hair and she got so upset about the thought of outliving all of her friends. Give me Rose having friendships (and romances, if you're into not sticking with strict eternal immortal monogamy) that she doesn't tell her friends back on Earth about because it hurts too much that it's already over even though she got 2, 10, 35 years with them. Give me Rose freaking out with Jack over the fact that they're going to outlive all of their still-human loved ones by millennia - give me Rose freaking out that she's going to outlive the Doctor (pre-TTC reveal) in the end. I want Rose having a moment where it hits her that now that she has all the time in the world, she feels more like she's running out of time than ever before because the people she loves are going to be gone someday.

Sometimes major canon divergence isn't about making things sunshine and rainbows forever, sometimes it's about making things a different kind of sad.

[bayetea]

I'm gonna froth at the mouth over this in the tags so bear with me but reason #1278038 why the way rick went about breaking up jiper was bad: rereading her povs in hoo where she gushes over jason feels like even more of an unreliable narrator queer girl comphet psychological horror story

[beanghostprincess]

Josuke being the single gay aroace cousin™ of the Joestars might actually be my favorite thing about him. I wish I were him, actually. Bloodline keeps going so no need for romance or kids. Only money from deadbeat dad and nepobabyism. Mr.Gucci-Vogue-LouisVuitton-Prada-Chanel-Balenciaga-RalphLauren-Versace-Armani-Moschino-Dior. His mom's like "are you not going to have kids or get married" and he's like "I'd rather wear thrifted clothes than dating". He actually lives with Okuyasu and everyone thinks they're dating and please don't ask them because they don't know either but what they do know is that Josuke has a flight the next day to go to Italy because his modeling agency asked him to go and Okuyasu is having a breakdown because "what if you like their cooking more than mine" and Josuke won't stop rolling his eyes and going "they could never be better than you" and then he comes back with a thousand of millions of bags saying he did "a little shopping over there" and half of the bags are just shoes.

[girlatrocity]

??? IS THAT IT?

[necrotic-nephilim]

hello, it's me again. so i saw you mention on my prompt how jason would be jealous of rose's healing factor when it comes to fucking kara and the jaycass you wrote and i thought why not combine them? in young justice jason and kara are part of the light and cass was in the shadows before defecting and joining the bats. what if she doesn't? childhood friends/lovers jaykara but kara becomes a red lantern after jason's death. after a while jason heals and goes on a mission with kara and they recognise each other. they cry, fight, fuck, all of that before breaking free of the light and run into cass. maybe cass and jason fucked a couple of times in the league to release some stress, and kara would be attracted to cass, so all three of them have a threesome inside a lazarus pit. just a cycle of fucking and breaking and dying and soul breaking healing. you can get really kinky with this too, like kara could ride jason to death, jason could fist cass until she needs the pit, cass could ride jason's face until he chokes on her juices, could even have kara bring a strap and her and jay could fuck cass at the same time (regular dp or anal dp) or peg jason until he can't walk. maybe they force kara to take a kryptonite shard up her pussy while jason fucks her and cass rides her face. technically the lazarus pit would boost their stamina every time they dip, and kara's a kryptonian, so they'd fuck for actual days or weeks. maybe they fuck so long they don't realise it until a team associated with the justice league walk in on them on a mission to rescue cass or something

HELLO YOU. YOU GET ME. it's my favorite thing EVER when the Laz Pit is utilized for a vicious cycle of fucking, dying, and fucking again. the altered mental state, the violent levels the sex can be taken to when dying no longer matter and longterm injuries aren't an issue... it lives in my brain.

i'll be honest, i don't know or care much about the Young Justice tv show so you'll have to forgive me for this being divorced from that world bc it's just. foreign as fuck to me so my apologies for that but as for the porn. (decided to put this headcanon/concept under a cut bc i feel like what could be considered snuff is probably a jumpscare for most ppl so. click at your own warning)

i just. i adore brutal dead dove sex that is destructive. like the whole "i want to crawl inside your chest" but it's *literal* and no one takes advantage of Laz Pits enough to do just that. like sex where you just physically can't hold yourself back from tearing open the flesh of the person you love bc you need to see their blood, you need to hold their heart in your greedy fist type shit. and if this is an AU where Jason and Kara were close but got separated by Jason ended up with the League, i do think their reunion could bring about just that. for once Kara isn't holding herself back and she's clawing at Jason's skin until he's bloody. i think it's fun if sometimes she just fucks him *in* the water bc it's quicker that way and Jason is constantly on this edge of death and rebirth at the same time. and with Cass in the mix too. JayCass you get me anon <3 Jason loves Kara still but it's clear he and Cass are a sort of package deal now and Kara might not know Cass well but if Jason loves her, she can trust that. so she gets to know Cass in the only way she cares about at the moment, pinning Cass down and fucking her. with a strap, with her own fist, anything that she can get inside of Cass to feel her body. maybe she pushes in too far and fucks Cass bloody until Csss needs the Pit sooner than even Jason did. and for Cass, who has no benchmark for real love but this dizzying feeling of being revived over and over, this is all she can ask for. devotion.

them suffocating on each other is so good- Kara doesn't care if Jason or Cass need to breathe, she cares about getting off and feeling whole again. she holds them down until their body gives out and forces them into the Pit again. maybe at some point she gets curious and holds one of them down facedown in the waters just to see if it's even possible to drown in the Lazarus Pit or not. she breaks bones just because she can and she wants to see what level of pain it takes for Cass to actually react to. how long it takes for a human body to bleed out. exploring their bodies means memorizing the limitations of them. it means she learns what them getting close to death looks like the same as getting close to an orgasm and whispers filthy dirty talk about how she can hear Jason's heart about to go out as he's trying desperately to come before he dies again. she counts how many minutes it takes before they die from lack of oxygen and compares who can last longer.

the Kryptonite shard is also enlightened- eventually Cass and Jason want to be the ones in control bc fair is fair and they deserve to do the same to Kara so they find some stash of Kryptonite and hold Kara down until it's deep inside of her and she's weak and in pain but still getting fucked. and she gets to taste the Lazarus Pit too, which i think would make her absolutely feral. Kara deserves some Pit rage for fun, i think even if she only gets to taste it while Cass is holding her down so Jason can fuck the Kryptonite deeper inside of her. every now and then Kara actually manages to strike one of them hard enough to injure them and it doesn't matter bc the Pit is right there.

all of it lasting for Days is just. good. like the haze the Pit has on the mind, being used over and over? almost like a spell none of them can break. they'd live the rest of their lives like this if they could and there would never even be a realistic end. it takes someone else walking in and managing to separate them before they actually calm down. and days before all the Lazarus Pit wears off and it finally sinks in just how fucked up what they did together was. and how fucked up it is that they don't even regret it. they're already trying to figure out where another Lazarus Pit is and how they can get control of it. i think it's fun if they spring it on each other too. like Jason will fall asleep in his bed but wake up to Cass and Kara holding his head under the green waters as he thrashes on instinct. Cass will be minding her business until Kara literally grabs her at superspeed and just flies her off to the waters to spread her legs and fuck her at superspeed until she's a bloody mess. they never know peace with each other and they irreparably damage their psyches over this. ty and gn.

[bcdrawsandwrites]

So uh, no cover for this yet, but I wrote this an age ago and figured now was a good time to post it.

Bindle

Fandom: Inanimate Insanity Rating: K Genre: Angst Characters: Toilet (plus references to other characters like MePhone and MePad) Fic Description: Mister Phone had told him to leave, so it was time to go. Beta Readers: @jaywings and @mephoj Notes: I know the subtitles spell it "Mistah Phone," but since he's being referred to just in prose here and not in dialogue (with Toilet's accent), it's just "Mister Phone."

---~~~---

He didn't much remember what he'd packed.

Everything had happened so fast, and he could hardly think past the burning and dizziness in his tank as he hopped away to gather what little he had. The only thing to bring him out of his haze was the sudden spike of frustration at how hard it was to tie a knot without hands, especially when he wasn't focused.

Toilet found himself biting down on one corner of the red handkerchief, trying to tug at the knot with his invisible grip. It wasn't a very good knot and Mister Phone wouldn't have been terribly happy with that kind of shoddy work but he managed to secure it to the stick he'd apparently found. The bindle was not a big one, but he slung it behind his tank nonetheless.

Mister Phone had told him to leave, so it was time to go.

While his earlier actions had been performed in a furious, tear-blurred haze, he hopped through the contestant grounds with a great deal more slowness, thumping against the soft grass and feeling heavier with each step. After a moment he paused, turning around to take in the view.

By now, the area was cast in soft moonlight, and it was hard to see everything from where Toilet stood at the edge of the grounds. If any contestants were still out and about—probably celebrating their immunity and the fact that they got to spend more time with Mister Phone—he couldn't see them from here. Maybe a speck of light in the distance indicating Hotel OJ, but that was it. He didn't even get to have one last look at the people he'd been working with for the past several months.

It struck him that he didn't even get to say goodbye.

Something gave a terrible yank in his plumbing, and he jumped up into a frantic hover.

"GOODBYE EVERYBODYYYY!" he called out into the night. His voice echoed briefly, and he landed on the ground, waiting a moment. When nothing happened, he jumped into a slightly lower hover, shakily adding: "I-I love you...!"

Again he landed, waiting a moment longer for a response. Maybe someone rushing out to ask him what was going on, or where he was going. Or someone calling "goodbye" back. He'd even take Mister Phone telling him to shut up.

Nothing.

He was leaving this place for good, and no one cared.

Something tugged in his plumbing again, and he spun back around, hurrying away as his vision blurred with tears.

But no, no, maybe they didn't know yet, he argued to himself as he charged past the edges of the contestant grounds. Maybe they hadn't noticed—the last challenge hadn't ended that long ago. It had to be that, right? Maybe later they'd be looking around for him and saying "Hey, where did Toilet run off to?" They would miss him, Mister Phone would miss him, they had to, they had to, they—

His porcelain struck a rock he'd failed to notice, and he tumbled forward, splashing water on the ground and inadvertently slinging his bindle ahead of him. It clattered down softly in the grass, the handkerchief coming untied, spilling some of its contents.

"Ah!" he cried, hurrying up to the pile of items. While some were still covered by the handkerchief, several colorful cards had been scattered across the grass.

Toilet rushed to gather them up, but took a moment to stare at each one as he picked it up. The first was a cat drawn in marker and glitter on a blue card, while the next was... Microphone? He'd drawn her shouting with a bunch of sound waves coming out around her. Next was Baseball and Nickel—he'd drawn them on the same card since they seemed to like to hang out—and then there was Balloon, and Fan and that funny egg, and some more cats, and Marshmallow, and Mister Phone, and...

...Oh, right. These had been for him.

He'd nearly forgotten, after everything that had happened. He'd drawn these the other day when he'd found Mister Phone unconscious by the painting of the corn man. He'd had that weird message on his screen—something about memory—so Toilet had decided to try drawing a bunch of "memory cards" to help him jog that memory. He'd drawn all the contestants, even the eliminated ones, so Mister Phone would remember the game show and be able to get back to it. But then MePad had come along and—

Toilet paused.

On the last card, he’d drawn MePad next to Toilet himself.

I do not intend on being superior to you at all. I consider us equals. We both serve a different purpose, is all.

He stared down at the drawing, at MePad's screen colored in purple ink and shimmering glitter.

The last time he'd seen that screen, he'd been staring into it imploringly, waiting for MePad to back him up, to support him as he always had. Mister Phone was upset and not acting very rationally, but MePad could talk Mister Phone down and convince him that he didn't need to fire Toilet.

But when MePad had met Toilet's gaze, he'd only looked away.

"Equals…?" Toilet muttered, glaring down at the drawing. "Good to know that was a bunch of hogwash!" He punctuated the last word with a splash of water, soaking the card and causing the ink to run, the glitter to wash away. For a moment he felt a twinge of regret, but only for a moment, and he turned back to the fallen bindle with a huff.

As he moved part of the handkerchief aside to put the stack of cards back in, he wound up uncovering the rest of its contents: a bundle of wires in a rainbow of colors.

Oh.

That’s right… Mister Phone had asked for them so often, he'd finally gone out one day to gather a variety of them to have ready. He hadn't really asked for them since, but Toilet had hung onto them, just in case.

Maybe Mister Phone would need them again—need him again—and call him back.

Shaking himself, Toilet quickly gathered his possessions again and tied the bindle back together, making sure the knot was extra-tight this time. Slinging it behind his tank, he continued his journey, noticing the grass beneath him slowly transition into sand. Up ahead, water lapped against the otherwise-silent beach.

It struck him that he had no idea where to go from here. He'd been working here for so long, ever since Master Adam had hired him to—

...Wait, that was it!

Mister Phone had only gotten so angry after he'd mentioned Master Adam. It had to be something to do with him, right? If Mister Phone was angry at Master Adam, then Master Adam must've done something awful!

Where was Master Adam, though? Toilet had never met him in person—they'd only ever spoken over the phone. But Mister Phone had also mentioned the corn man, so maybe Master Adam was working for him? Funny he'd never seen him when they visited the Cloud, though. If he'd known, he would've stopped at his office to say hello.

Well... maybe he could give his office a visit, then, but not for a friendly chat.

Toilet strode across the sandy beach, a goal finally set in mind.

He was going to get to the bottom of this, and figure out what was bothering Mister Phone once and for all.

And… and then maybe Mister Phone would want him back.

…Maybe?

…please?