#I don’t know how to get it out of my system
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I’ve been thinking about this a lot myself lately. Not sure I have all the words to articulate it correctly, however. I genuinely am uncertain if this makes sense but here are my thoughts:
Justice and Anders merge together at the end of Awakening willingly (assumed and with some nudging done by Nathaniel if he’s alive still). Justice is then inside of a man that is angry at the way the world treats mages. Whether it had been Anders’ anger that twisted Justice or not, living in Kirkwall of all places definitely didn’t help as OP said. (Look at how Justice reacts with Karl in Anders’ companion quest.) Justice is being denied his purpose actively in Kirkwall. There is a clear imbalance between the mages and the Templars and there’s nothing that could be done to improve it, no matter how hard you try. An injustice of a system that doesn’t work for either side, imo. (Fuck the chantry, honestly.) The way we see it play out is that Anders writes his manifesto (in a rivalry) and is possessed by Justice when the Chantry goes up in flames. That was Vengeance, acting on its own accord because there way no other way to get results. Peace was thin as it was, even before Meredith’s Right of Annulment or Orsino’s turn to blood magic. Peace was a bandaid solution at best (imo) and probably wouldn’t have worked in the long run.
Lucanis and Spite, on the flip side, did not merge willingly. In a banter with Bellara, we learn Zara had used a method she learned from a cult in Orlais used to corrupt Seekers since they are immune to demons. This made me think of the Order of Fiery Promise, who force fed Cassandra’s apprentice, Daniel, red lyrium (he said it felt like a demon). Lucanis compared it to a “parasite in uncooked meat”, which is probably how he sees Spite, as a parasite (initially before coming to an agreement). We know that Spite is referred to many times as a Spirit of Determination (Seer Rowan, Compassion, Solas, and Hall of Valor Arena Isabela announcement), and he was possibly twisted before being forced to possess Lucanis because Spite probably didn’t want to possess a body (Solas parallel?). In spite of the year of torture and being forced to become an abomination, Lucanis walks a very poorly thought out plan of drinking coffee and not sleeping to avoid being possessed. Because it doesn’t always work. There are a few gaps I think needed to be filled in regards of just how much influence Spite had on Lucanis like Justice had on Anders, but I digress. In the end, Spite and Lucanis are able to come to an agreement (depending on how you play) that they could agree to complete ‘contracts’ together as a team. Examples of this is if you say save Caterina or get revenge for Illario’s betrayal.
My point is, Lucanis and Anders had different approaches to their possessions. I don’t think either of them fully came to terms with being abominations, but they found a way to live with it. And depending upon how you play their stories, mainly Anders in this, it’s a matter of can you still see the man or is it the monster he was afraid of becoming.
i think it’s a little unfair to compare spite and justice’s ability to act normal against each other, or to act like spite just being a misbehaving cat diminishes how hard it was for anders justice to cope with possession. spirits in the material world get upset when they can’t fulfil the pure ideal they seek. spite is a creature of spite and gets to kill people trying to hurt it basically all the time. justice is a creature of justice and was living in fucking kirkwall
#veilguard spoilers#dragon age#lucanis dellamorte#anders#da2#spite#justice#long post#getting my thoughts together
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google how do I stop being mad over something stupid
#there’s this fic. that I keep sporadically thinking about and getting mad over how all the characters acted#I’ve ranted enough to my brother about it. I can’t keep bugging my friends about it#I can’t post details about it because people will probably harass the author#so I’m just siting here. MAD skdhdjjdhd#I don’t know how to get it out of my system#it’s so stupid it ultimately doesn’t matter yet here I am#it’s driving me nuts#rozu thoughts
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i want to talk about walmart for a second. if you haven’t worked or known someone who worked for walmart, you probably don’t know how bad it is. most people don’t, so i want to talk about it.
there’s a points system for absences. if you miss work, and can’t cover it with accrued time off (because you don’t just Get time off - it builds up over time. it takes about a month of straight work to get a day off.) you get a point. five points and you’re at risk of termination. all managers - team leads, and above them, coaches - have the power to excuse points so that you don’t get fired. some do, so you don’t lose your job. most don’t. five days, that’s it.
if you miss more than three shifts of work due to a medical issue, you have to go through a third party company (which isn’t really third party.) to get a medical exception so you don’t lose your job. it is hard to get this. they need a lot of documentation to prove that you somehow deserved to miss work. they don’t accept regular doctors notes. this is somehow nebulously legal. you are also forced to work while sick and infectious. flu, strep, covid, doesnt matter for all departments except produce and deli. even then, they only send you home if you throw up *at work* or have food-related illnesses. every other department you’re not allowed to go home. more than likely you are being exposed to someone who’s sick at walmart, because its either come in sick or get fired.
i work hard. everyone *has* to work hard. you are on your feet 8 hours a day. you can’t sit. there are no surfaces to sit on. some departments are harder than others. i worked in OPD, the online grocery fulfillment department. i would walk, bare minimum, 7 to 8 miles a day, hauling sometimes over 200 pounds of groceries. every day. now i work in the deli. you are constantly moving. this is very typical for the deli - you are given too many tasks to perform in one day. most days i can barely get enough done. i know people don’t take their legally entitled second breaks. I know people who have to work off the clock just to get everything done. my department - as is *most other departments* - is understaffed. i cook, clean, work the slicer, and dispense food at the same time. and trust me when i tell you the standards of cleanliness in my department is high, but in practice it is very, very poor. simply because there is usually only one of us working back there, and we just can’t do everything right all at once.
none of the “fresh” food in the bakery / produce area is fresh. the bread is baked in store, but the dough is made and frozen elsewhere. sometimes it’s been frozen for weeks. everything is shockingly artificial. same with produce. you’re better off buying your produce elsewhere, or even locally. walmart has been fraught with recall after recall.
people are cheated out of retirements. so many people I know that are at retirement age simply can’t. there are people working here in their 70s. they are being overworked. there are a lot of teenagers that work up front. they are being overworked. I know two kids who are disabled that work the register. they aren’t allowed to sit. one had to fight to be able to get a medical accommodation and only got one when he threatened to sue, because not taking a doctor’s note for an accommodation is illegal. they do it anyways. there are so many people i know personally that are disabled, have chronic pain, have mobility issues, and can’t sit. or walk miles and miles a day. one of my coworkers recently quit because she tore both rotator cuffs in her shoulders from this job. this job disables you. it kills you. (just look up how many people have died on the job due to negligence. it is not a small amount.)
even the prices are fake. sales are fake. rollback is fake. i notice how things are priced and they rarely change, even when they say they’re on sale. it’s a scam. you are being scammed.
we are overworked and underpaid for our labor. (speaking of, wages used to be higher by several dollars a couple years ago. they lowered them. my department paid 20 an hour. it only pays 16 now. almost all other departments are at a flat 14. it used to be 16.)
wage theft, lack of breaks, overtime violations, lack of sick leave, chronic understaffing and chronic abuse from management, not terminating employees that sexually harass coworkers, and piles and piles and piles of responsibilities. all of this is to say, walmart only operates because of how much they exploit their workers, and it’s in the top of the Fortune 500 list. it is impossibly dire. and it is in EVERY SINGLE store, because that is just how the work culture operates.
all salaried management is also given guides on union busting. unionization is impossible. there was one store that they completely shut down because of successful unionization efforts, laying off hundreds of people, and blamed it on “faulty plumbing.”
one last thing - if you are assaulted by a customer, you cannot defend yourself. nobody can help you, because none of us are allowed to put our hands in any capacity on a customer. if you are assaulted, you have no choice but to run and hide. I’ve heard of a worker at my store that was assaulted repeatedly over several days from people who would come in and beat her. they weren’t banned, and she was fired for fighting back. if you fight back, you’re fired immediately, no exceptions.
all of this is to say shop elsewhere. buy locally. buy at other stores. you will get better quality items and produce literally ANYWHERE else. if you can’t, be kind to Walmart workers. theres abuse at every step of the chain. even on the supply side. walmart is a corporate dystopian monster that only makes its money off of intense labor violations.
tl;dr don’t shop at walmart. it’s not worth it
#thoughts#needed to yap about my job for a minute and how much i hate it#all of these things are things I’ve personally seen or heard that has happened at my store#to people I know or to people who knew others affected#sorry it ended up so long BUT THIS ISNT EVEN EVERYTHING.#THERES SO MUCH MORE.#SO MUCH!!! I PROMISE!!!!!
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40 DAYS AND 40 NIGHTS CHAPTER ELEVEN
thought i’d be lying if i said ‘i didn’t want you to myself.’ when you look me in my eyes and, tell me that it’s mine, i…
pairing wnba!paige bueckers x singer!oc
taglist @thaatdigitaldiary @ohbueckers @wbbgetsmewetter @rosemariiaa @tndaqlifwy @pboogerswbb @xxloveralways14 @makethemhoesmad @slvt4her @uconnpazzi @luvapaigeeyy @hedidnotpleaseme @paigesbabygirl @mopopshop @omg-imtumbling @ch12334 @wbb4l
warnings angst, allusions to sex, more julian mentions
kalena speakss 🪽! yall will hate me and thank me for this chapter, sorry :(
July 2025 — Hartford, Connecticut
“Nuh uh! I’m standing next to Boogers, she was my senior!”
“She was everyone’s senior, she was here for too damn long.” Sarah responds, making the bunch of my former teammates laugh.
I don’t even bother to fight back. I didn’t realize how much I’d miss these girls until I was across the country. Connecticut has become home to me, five years of lessons and friendships that I’ll hold into forever. It’s my first time back in Connecticut since the national championship, and the feeling is unreal.
The amount of UConn jerseys is unreal, cheers each time I checked in, after every shot. It became normal to me, loudest crowds in LA, then Minnesota, and now Connecticut. My third home.
We all stand at center court at Mohegan Sun, all of my former teammates excluding Aubrey who’s in New York and Kaitlyn who’s in San Francisco.
We take the picture and everyone disperses, breaking into a multitude of conversations.
“So, we going out tonight? Like old times?” Ice is beaming at me, a smile fitting her face as she tugs me down with an arm around my neck.
I chuckle. “I’m too damn old to be showing up at Ted’s again.” I mutter. My shoes squeak against the hardwood with each step I take to get out of her hold.
“No, not Ted’s, a different— that doesn’t matter. You coming? Please?”
I nod, tugging on the gatorade towel that accumulates the sweat around my neck. “Cam’s coming too.”
“Perfect! The more the merrier.”
—
The more the merrier was right.
The club was loud and fucking packed, from athletes to college kids, anyone that you could imagine. My leg bounces along to the music playing while Allie and Azzi talk about God knows what a few feet in front of me. The beer I’m drinking glides down my throat while I look around.
“This place is jumpin’.” I murmur to Caroline next to me.
She nods, the hair that frames her face swinging over her shoulder as she looks at me. “I know. Maybe you can get some play tonight.”
“You think I’m not gettin’ any in LA?” I laugh, taking another swig.
“I know you’re not getting any. I have my sources.”
I roll my eyes, spinning back around in my bar stool for another drink.
There was definitely enough alcohol in my system. Tequila burning in my chest and a couple beers downed as well. I’m well beyond thinking straight, which to me is fine since we don’t play again for another two days.
“Lemme get a dirty shirley.” I tell the nice bartender who’s probably cringing at my alcohol breath.
“Can I get one of those too? And two shots of vanilla crown, please?”
The voice literally makes me freeze.
I know it well, so well, that I’m not even surprised when I look to my right and Nyla sits there with a smile towards the bartender. I haven’t seen her in what feels like years, even if the last time was in Tampa during the tourney.
She looks good. I mean, she always does. It’s why I let her walk all over me for so long. Why I kept going back no matter how much it hurt.
Nyla wears a blue corset top, it contrasts beautifully with her brown skin and cups her breasts in a way that drags my eyes down to them. Sober, I wouldn’t have paid her any mind. But right now my head is spinning and I can’t help it.
“Good to see you.” She feeds me a tight lipped smile.
I look over my shoulder at Caroline, who is no longer paying any attention to me.
“You look good, Ny.” I say through squinted eyes.
The bartender slides my drink to me over the table, her’s as well. And when Nyla picks up her drink, and her lips purse around the small black straw, my mind immediately goes to Maraye.
I haven’t thought about her in a while, not since she left my apartment. Yet, the second I look at Nyla I think of her. The way her hands, done up with pretty french tips, would wrap around the glass cup. Or the way she smiled at me when I bought her a drink that night in Atlanta.
I turn away, feeling the wood of the bar dug into my back as I watch Allie, and now Cameron and Caroline. They’re inebriated, definitely more than me, and dancing freely to Teenage Dream by Katy Perry.
“You don’t wanna talk?”
“What’s there to talk about, Nyla.” The statement navigates through the air, and the second it reaches her ears she huffs.
“You’ve never been good at talking about things.” Nyla laughs.
I’m quick to scoff and take another hefty gulp of my shirley. “I’ve always been good at that. You just don’t seem to listen to me.”
We sit in an uncomfortable silence, her heal taps against the tiled floor in a rhythm I wish would stop.
“We should talk, P. About Tampa, about everything. You ghosted me the morning after.”
“And you ghosted me after I told you I had feelings for you.” I returned. “It was forever ago, Nyla. Move on.”
I see her down one of her shots before slamming the small glass down on the counter. She takes in a sharp breath of air, swiveling in her chair to look at me. Nyla’s upset.
So many months of me getting angry, then realizing how badly I need her, then going right back. Countless times spent having sex with her rather than realizing how much I was letting myself go by just being around her.
She ruined me, and now that I’m not falling for it, she’s upset.
“Why’re you being such an ass about this?” She yells, the music drowns out the noise but I can still make out the bass in her voice. “It’s that bitch in LA, huh? That’s why you can’t talk to me?”
“Watch your fucking mouth.” I snap almost instantly.
It’s too often that I forget that Maraye and I aren’t the only two people in the world. That everyone around us still sees the way we look at each other or act around one another.
We co-exist with everyone else. They are also affected by the shit we do. The things we say.
The way we kiss each other.
“Oh so she is your girlfriend?”
“You’on’t get to be mad about shit. I’m setting boundaries with you.” I say, refusing to bring Raye’s name up again and make things worse. I care about Maraye, obviously, and if I had to hear a girl who literally ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it repeatedly call her out of her name again, I might get suspended.
I finish what’s left of my vodka filled drink, mouth tasting of grenadine and tingling faintly from the sprite.
“I want you, P. Y’know that.” Nyla hums. She’s so damn sadistic. She knows the exact way to get under my skin all the while turning my brain to mush for her.
“No you don’t.” I scoff. “You don’t know what you want, Ny. That’s why I ended all this shit.”
This conversation is entirely reminiscent of the one I had with Raye earlier this week. Which makes me think that she didn’t do anything about the pressing Julian-situation.
Then I’m getting angry all over again. Pissed off that not only is the girl that I want is probably at home pillow talking her boyfriend, but that the girl I once was fucking helpless over is sitting in front of me telling me everything I want to hear from her. Not her–Nyla, her–Maraye.
Even though I have on shorts and t-shirt, my body still feels like I’m on fire as if I was wearing a full snow suit. The alcohol and combined anger has my brain running in laps, from Maraye to Nyla to the fucking flight I have to be on time for in the morning.
And it’s hard to keep it all intact with the way Nyla fucking looks at me. Like she hates me but there’s still a glint in her eye that reminds me of the first time we met. When I saw her in the stands sophomore year, her hair was short and brown with blonde streaks. She was everything then.
“Paige.”
“No, Nyla.”
But now, I don't even recognize her. Her voice sounds like a fever dream, or a fragment of my imagination.
“I can fix this.”
Her hand rests on my knee. I should jump or push her away but I just stare at it like an idiot.
My legs spread apart subconsciously, welcoming her between them. And I am an idiot, allowing her to stand in this place that I have decided belongs to Maraye.
“Lemme fix it, P. Like old times.”
We’re at eye level like this. Her hand trailing up my thigh and to my shoulder. I need to push her away. Tell her to get off me, and then head back to the hotel. By myself.
But I can’t.
For whatever damn reason. I can’t.
—
July 2025 — Los Angeles, California
I rock awkwardly on my heels, bottom lip tucked between my teeth so tight it might bleed.
My heart beats rapidly in my chest while I wait for the door to swing open. I can hear the hum of the air conditioning system blow through the hallway and the sound of my breaths coming out heavy and ragged.
The lock click echos when the door finally does pull open and there he stands. Hand stuffed in the pocket of his black dress pants.
It’s crazy, that just months ago I was head over heels over this man. The sight of him like this would’ve sent me into orbit, but now it’s like he’s just here. Just another person in my world.
“We need to talk.” I stutter, eyes glued to him.
“Yeah.” Julian responds, turning around and walking into his apartment. He doesn’t close the door, leaving it open for me to follow him, I do so not forgetting to lock it behind me.
“This needa be quick. I got a meeting.” He murmurs as we approach his bedroom.
I haven’t been here in forever, and that’s totally and completely my own fault. I’ve been so damn avoidant. Sure I was always working, but I made time in my day to go see Paige or Rickea or my sister. But with Julian I just chose not to.
“That’s fine.” I say. “We uh, Ion think this is working, Ju.”
He hums, nodding and throwing on a button up shirt over his wife beater shirt.
I don’t even think he’s surprised, more content with the result. Like he expected this the second I rang his doorbell. Maybe even earlier than that.
“Damn.” It’s not a disappointing damn, quite the opposite actually.
“I’m sorry. I just— I can’t give you what you want. We’re one opposite ends of life right now, and I don’t wanna hurt you. Really.”
I don’t know how much is the truth and how much is meant to be a lie to get him to not talk about our last argument. I know I can’t give him what he needs, it’s not because of my alleged time management struggles.
My heart wasn’t in it. Even if it wasn’t for Paige, I’d be calling it quits because I’m not into him the way I should be. She taught me that. The lengths I’d go to for someone I had feelings for, I simply don’t think I could do for him.
“That’s it? Y’just can’t make time for me?”
I huff at the undertone of his voice.
“Nah, this isn’t me arguing. You really think that?”
I nod. “Among other things, yes.” I can’t look at him. Because even though I think he doesn’t, Julian knows me well. He knows my tells and the way I react under pressure. “You deserve better than me, Julian.”
His cologne burns through the air when he sprits it out across his skin. I’m sure that the second I leave, that damned scent would be ingrained into my mind forever, I’d never forget it.
“And this has nothing to do with her?”
Julian doesn’t look away from me for a second, staring holes into my soul that make me feel naked. My hands sweat, and I stuff them in the back pockets of my jeans.
I’d be dumb to stand here and keep lying. I’m already an idiot for thinking that everything would be peaches and cream after this. So I take a breath of air, which basically confirms any doubts Julian has running in his head.
“I— Ju.”
“I fuckin’ knew it. You sleepin’ with her?”
“No. No, Ju. She just— it’s so easy to be myself around her, and I feel like I'm always fighting to be myself with you.” I explain, partially trying to save my ass. “I dunno.”
“So that’s it. You cheat on me and think shit just gonna work out with her?”
“All I can control is this. We aren’t working, so we’re breaking up. That’s it, Julian.” I say, fully aware of how disgusted he looks with me right now.
Never in a million years did I think this shit could happen to me. I’m so conflicted, I don’t deserve whatever happy ending may come with Paige. I don’t deserve his forgiveness either, that’s for damn sure.
“Whatever.” Julian shrugs, walking out of the room with his shoes in hand. I follow behind him, trying to meditate the situation any way I can. It doesn’t work, as I expected.
He trots to the door, unlocking it again and pulling it open. He stands in the doorway, looking at me expectantly. His height looms over me as he waits.
Words form on my tongue and instantly die there. I shut my mouth, slipping through the corridor and hearing it slam behind me.
And for a brief second, I feel good. Like everything is going the way it’s supposed to.
Then the reality of it all hits me, and I feel like I want to run into a wall.
—
July 2025 — Hartford, Connecticut
My heartbeat rings in my ears while I make an attempt to catch my breath.
Nyla lays next to me, sweaty and naked, and months ago I would’ve been completely enamored by the sight. But now I’m just fucking disgusted.
She’s gorgeous, always has been. That’s not the issue.
The issue is her lips don’t taste like that vanilla sweet cream I would always taste after being with Raye. It’s almost bitter, just pure alcohol.
I eagerly throw my legs off the side of the bed. We’re at her apartment, not too far from my hotel. I feel her stare into my back, piercing through me and suddenly I’m well aware of my own nakedness. I toss my bra followed by my shirt over my head before picking up my boxers and putting them on too. The bed shifts, dipping slightly before I feel her hand on my arms.
The events of the last hour have sobered me up tremendously, her hands that once were burning hot to the touch are suddenly freezing. Almost dead.
“Where you goin’?” Nyla asks. Her voice is raspy from the screaming of my name. It should make me feel good, as it always seems to no matter who I’m with.
This time it doesn’t.
I shrug her off of me standing up from the bed and searching for the rest of my clothes. My shorts, socks, shoes all scattered somewhere. I threw the hair tie that kept my hair in a ponytail somewhere too, and Nyla was definitely crazy enough to use it to make a clone of myself.
“Paige, I said—”
“I heard what you said. I’m getttin’ the fuck outta here.”
“You’re not doing this shit again.” She grumbles, pulling on her panties and trying to chase after me. Nyla grabs my arm as she spins me around, looking up at me while I stare up at the ceiling in an attempt to avoid her tits in my face.
“This was a mistake.” I explain, pushing her off of me and finally putting on my shorts. My shoes follow. “You and me are fuckin’ done. Ion know how many times I gotta say that for it to click in your damn head.”
“‘Cause you say shit like that and then come crawling right back!” She’s yelling now, and I can only imagine how irritated her neighbors have become with us. “You wanna act like you didn’t just fuck me? Or that you didn’t tell me you missed me.”
“I’m fucking drunk! That’s the only reason why I do any of this shit with you.” I yell, back. “Ion want shit to do with you, Nyla. I’m moving on.”
“Moving onto that ho, in LA? Is she better than me?”
“You got one more fuckin’ time to—” I cut myself off with a heavy breath, shaking my head and grabbing the rest of my belongings off her nightstand. “Get over it. We’re done. This is never, and I mean never, fuckin’ happening again.” I muse. I’m quick to rush out of the apartment, phone in hand, while I shut the door.
I feel dirty. Like I just committed a fucking felony and was on the run.
The cool air finally hits me like a breath of fresh air when I finally touch the streets. My hotel wasn’t far, a block, maybe more, away.
I’m ashamed of myself, for going back to Nyla and falling for her dumbass words as if they meant something. They never did.
Then it hits me.
Maraye.
I nearly stop in the middle of the street before picking up my pace and walking into the hotel building.
God knows what decision she’s made. She could be with Julian right now telling him everything he wants to hear. Or she could be waiting for me. To call her, to text her, to tell her that I miss her.
And believe it or not, I do. I fucking miss her crazy. Her voice and those gorgeous fucking eyes. The way she listens to me like I’m the only person left on Earth, like it’s just me and her. I miss her smell, the Chanel no.5 combined with some vanilla body spray that she almost always seemed to have on, that permanently left its mark on my nose and my soul. Everything about her being, I miss it like crazy.
I’m in the elevator, the hum of the gears and the corny ass elevator music that plays only leaves me with my thoughts. Feelings of disparity and fucking anger.
How could I be so stupid. All it took was a few drinks and a fucking glare and now I’ve made arguably the biggest mistake of my life.
My phone starts ringing when I pull out my key card. I stand in the hallway, flipping the device over and staring at it.
Her name, in bright and bold font with the anatomical heart emoji next to it. It’s so intimate, an emoji that I think I’ve only ever used in correspondence with her. The picture is recent, I changed it after she left my place that night. It’s the two of us seated on my couch, her head resting on my shoulder with her lips in that cute pout she does in almost all her photos. My eyes are red from sleep but I still keep a nose-scrunched smile on my face.
I catch myself just standing there, looking at her looking at me until the call goes to voicemail.
I’m glad that it does, because I know that if I were to pick up the phone and hear her voice as she talks I might break down.
I unlock the door, kicking my shoes off the minute the door closes. I rest my back against it, head tossed onto the white painted portal.
Then my phone buzzes again.
i miss you. call me in the morning k?
I fucked up. Fucked it all up.
#sierrale8ne#kalena’s works ୧ ‧₊˚ 🍵 ⋅#paige bueckers#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers smut#uconn wbb#la sparks#lesbian#my fic#40 days and 40 nights
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I usually stay up late (right now is 3 am and I still have things to do) programming and doing stuff.
I thought about this fic idea and you popped into my mind.
How about we mostly work in IT for SHIELD/the avengers so we mostly stay with computers or we are in workshops. The thing is we are with yelena and in general we get along with everyone. Lately yelena has noticed that we are more tired than usual, because us being a workaholic person can’t just stop working. One night yelena finds us sleeping on our computer while we were programming/hacking, she tries to gets us to sleep and we try to deny it. Next day yelena has some words with nick fury.
This is probably bad written but right now my brain is not braining sorry
Workaholic
Pairing: Yelena Belova x GN! Reader
Summary: You’re a workaholic that doesn’t realise how drained you can get.
Fluff & Tiny Angst
Warnings: None, if there is any, please let me know. | 1.7K
Translations: Detka (baby)
AC: Thank you for sending this! I know it has taken me FOREVER & I do apologise for that. I hope you enjoy this! x
She watched in silence every morning when you would drag yourself out of bed to the kitchen for breakfast before leaving for work and she would watch again when you would finally come home late at night, hair slightly a mess before you’d take a shower and crash almost instantly the minute you sat down on the bed. She didn’t know what was going on at work, but she knew it was draining any energy you had left.
Anytime she would meet you for lunch or when she would see you for the short period of time before and after work, you were just tired. Conversations were flat and short; you began to work later than usual which led to you going to work earlier than normal.
At first, Yelena just assumed it was something really important that Nick Fury, your boss, needed you to get done but when she found you one night, asleep at your desk, it raised more concern and worry for you.
Yelena sighed lightly to herself as she leant against the doorframe of your office, her brows frowning with concern at the sight of you slumped over your desk, the blue light from the monitors didn’t seem to wake you, your fingers still lightly pressed on the last letters you had pressed before resting your head. Lines of coding ran across the multiple screen system surrounding you, these were things she knew she would never truly understand how they worked.
“Detka” she said softly, attempting to wake you. You stirred slightly, giving her a light groan but no real signs of opening your tired eyes. “Let me take you home so you can get some real sleep” you heard her Russian accent ever so softly speak. Unintentionally, you groaned once more, this time your eyes flickering open, the brightness of your screen making them sting.
“I..I’m fine” you mumbled, sitting up straight, trying to rub the sleep from your eyes.
“Detka, you can’t keep doing this. What is so important to Fury that has you falling asleep at your desk?” Yelena asked, her brows frowned with worry.
“I just need like 5 more minutes, I promise” you replied in your groggy state.
“More like another 5 hours” Your girlfriend muttered before she reached for your computer mouse before you could even string together where things were. “I’m not letting you make yourself sick for whatever this is” Yelena added, her voice low but firm, “you need sleep. No more hacking for tonight” she said as you watched the little arrow on your screen close down your opened tabs.
“Yelena!” You spat, “I can’t! I have too much do to and you just shut it down?!” You added, annoyed by your girlfriends actions as you looked up at her. Yelena shook her head, “if you write another line of coding, you’re going to become the damn coding!”
“You don’t get it, I need to get this done!” You frowned.
“And you get do it tomorrow” Your girlfriend said, crossing her arms over her chest. Your eyes dropped slightly, there was no fighting her one this, not even you felt your eyes grow heavy once more.
“Fine” you sighed, tiredly, “just let me close everything down properly before we go home” you added.
----
The next morning, you woke up in a panic. The sun light creeping in through the crack of the curtains, you reached for your phone to find out your alarm had been switched off. You sighed before throwing your head back down on the pillow before covering your face with both of your hands.
Yelena was giving her daggers a sharpen when you asked her why she had turned your alarm off.
“Because, detka, you needed a real sleep” she said, not batting and eye at you.
“Yelena, you made me late for work! I don’t even know what to tell Nick when I get there” you argued.
“I already told him you’d be running late today” Your loving girlfriend replied, looking up at you, “I’m worried about you” she added. One look into her green eyes and you were reminded of the worried look she had on her face late last night when she found you at your desk, asleep.
“You’re working yourself too hard, you come home and have a re-heated meal then shower and go to bed for a few short hours. Natasha and Wanda both said that you don’t even leave the compound for lunch, not even to get some fresh air. You are consistently at that desk working until early hours of the morning” Yelena said in a soft but firm tone.
“Baby, it’s my job” you said, leaning against the doorframe.
“Yes, it is but your job isn’t 16 hours a day”
Your eyes dropped to your feet, “I know, I just….i just want to make sure I’m doing the best I can for Fury. All the coding and hacking I do, it’s not easy. It’s time consuming and I need ot be on top of my game all the time” you explained in hopes it would help Yelena understand.
“You’re not going to be on top of your game if you’re falling asleep at your desk and barely function outside of work. Detka, I hate to say it, but you’re a workaholic” Yelena replied. You cocked a brow at the blonde, “I am not” you said, making Yelena chuckle.
“You are detka, a hard, smart working workaholic” she teased, causing you to playful roll your eyes. “Think whatever you want Lena, I’m going to go get ready for work”
“I’m taking you today” Yelena said just before you pushed yourself off the doorframe, “and I’m picking you up at 5pm” she added.
“Lena, you can trust me to come home at the end of my shift today”
“I know, but Nat is dragging me in to help her with some training thing so why not carpool?” She replied with a rather proud grin on her lips. You playfully shook your head at her before making your way to the bathroom to get ready for work.
----
You and Yelena walked into the compound, hand in hand before Yelena placed a soft kiss on your cheek and wished you a good day as you both parted ways, she waited until you were inside the elevator before she turned on her heels and headed towards Nick’s office.
Nick, busy as usual was sitting at his desk with a stack of paperwork beside him. His focus so deep on the document in front of him he didn’t even hear the knock on his door.
“Fury” Yelena said lightly, her accent coming in thick.
Nick looked up before leaning back in his chair, “Belova” he acknowledged with a raised eyebrow.
“I need to talk to you, it’s important” Yelena began, “it’s about Y/n” she added. Fury nodded, “come on, take a seat” he replied. Yelena closed the large wooden door behind her before she took a head on the typical office style chair. “What can I help you with?” The head of S.H.I.E.L.D asked.
“They’re pushing themselves too hard for whatever it is you have them working on. This is shield, right? Not some tech startup company. They need a break” Yelena said firmly.
“Right” Nick nodded, “and you think that I’ve been keeping them prisoner to their desk?” He added as he stood up from behind his desk and wandered over to Yelena, taking a the empty chair next to her, “Y/n is one of my hardest working IT employees, they are dedicated to their job, I admire it, I will all my IT employees would put in half the effort Y/n does. This job isn’t easy, there isn’t a real shift time start or end. We may need them at 4am if a mission goes south and they know that” he explains.
“But they are here early every day, and they leave later than anybody else. You can’t tell me that every mission over the last month has gone to shit” Yelena argued.
“No, but, like I said they are dedicated to their job. Look, I’ll have a look at the clock ins and outs. If Y/n is doing too much unneeded overtime, I will have a word to them but if they aren’t, I’m not going to get in the way of somebody who has a drive to work”
Yelena sighed lightly, “have you even seen them lately? They are exhausted, last night when they didn’t come home, I came here and found them asleep! At their desk! I’m not asking you to check their clock ins and outs, I am asking you to give them the break they deserve and need” Yelena said firmly, not backing down. “You can go a few days without them here. A few days is worth it then not having them at all” she added.
Fury remained silent for a moment, contemplating Yelena’s request. He knew Yelena was right; losing a little of something is better than not having it at all. “Okay” he said, finally breaking the silence, “I will speak to them on their lunch break” he added.
“Thank you” Yelena said, giving him a polite nod.
“You’re just like your sister, stubborn” Nick muttered with a cocked brow.
“I am when I need to be” Yelena teasingly grinned.
----
When 5pm came, you didn’t want to keep Yelena waiting, you shut down your computer and made sure your desk was tidy for tomorrow morning before you wandered the main hall of the compound. You smiled softly when you locked eyes on her leaning against her blue pick-up truck talking to Natasha, Bucky and Sam.
“What’s the gossip today guys?” You asked with a light chuckle.
Natasha was the first to turn and smile at you, “hold on a moment, are you unwell?” She asked, jokingly.
“Ha, Ha, very funny” you replied, playfully rolling your eyes as you stood next to Yelena, leaning your head on her shoulder. “Somebody couldn’t help themselves and spoke to Fury today” you added.
“Ohhh! Yelena went to the big dogs!” Sam laughed.
“She did and honestly, thank you” you said, looking up at Yelena.
“You’re welcome” she smiled softly.
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#yelenasdiary asks#living my marvel fantasy#fanfiction#yelena belova#marvel#Yelena Belova x reader#Yelena Belova x you
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Nahh, Val defenders are SCARY. I just saw the recent tea and lemme tell you. I’m an artist who does artist alley at huge cons over the USA and I’ve had people upset at me for having almost every Hazbin character as a keychain design except for Val because that mothafucker can go jump into an insect repellent buzzer for all I care. And I have had actual encounters IN PERSON of people who were upset I didn’t have the rapist man. I’d tell them I am too uncomfortable to draw him because guess what honey, I survived rape so of course he makes me uncomfortable. Also I’m the artist and I can draw whatever the fuck I want. And people would get upset saying they needed their husbando or tell me gee sucks for you but he’s a fictional character. Don’t care! I don’t care if he’s fictional, do you see how people treat awful men like him saying shit like they wished that Val had a contract with them? Don’t get me started on the ValAngel cosplayers who would pose in questionable manners, or the Val cosplayers who used their cosplay to excuse they heinous shit like touching people’s asses because they think they’re in character. And now with this print issue, it’s just going to get worse because people find the rapist man hot thanks to glorification of sexual assault. Also to the people comparing ValAngel to a consensual non-con kink, please seek help. Sorry babes I just had to get it out of my system because this is making me furious. Anyways, that’s my piping tea, and I love your blog.
Oh, sis, I just wanna start off saying that I am so sorry you have been dealing with this and that you're strong af for still being here and being you despite what horrors you faced. I wanna applaud you for your strength and keep up the good fight! I'd also like to apologize for taking so long to answer asks! After the latest drama, I have been getting so many more asks, and tbh I never thought my acc would get as much traction as it does nowadays! Glad you and every have been enjoying my posts and hope that I can better she'd light on Biv and her little posse!
Regarding your situation at cons, I am so sorry you had to deal with them obnoxious ass people. They say in one breath, "Oh, it's fiction!" But then, in the other, get pissed when said fiction is not available, that's how you know that they dgaf and only care about their "interests" over actual survivors concerns and critiques over the handling of SA. The fact that a lot of them do these sexual acts onto people proves the fiction DOES INDEED affect reality, unsurprisingly. Ima say it again, these mfers need to see Val get dogged on and made fun off lime a punching bag, and we'll see if they pull that same excuse.🫢🤭
#vivziepop critical#vivziepop criticism#anon ask#viv get a grip#vivienne medrano#vivziepop#hazbin fandom critical#hazbin hotel standom#hazbin standom#hazbin valentino#hazbin hotel valentino#valangel sucks btw
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Murder on Arcturus Station
In 1983, Games Designers’ Workshop released an adventure module for Traveller called Murder on Arcturus Station. It’s a straight-up sci-fi murder mystery – an early landmark in Traveller‘s goal of taking play out of the dungeon and zooming off in every direction possible.
There’s lots to like about this little adventure. The dead body is a sleazy capitalist, who in the premise of the adventure has just screwed the players’ characters out of payment for their last job. There’s also labour strife brewing because the aforementioned bossman is screwing everybody on this little mining station. There’s almost a dozen suspects, each of them having some kind of grief with him. It’s the slick neo-noir vibe of Picket Line Tango but done with all the lack-of-flair of 40 years ago.But the best thing about the module is that there’s no canonical murderer. As a part of prep, it asks the GM to decide.
But the best thing about the module is that there’s no canonical murderer. As a part of prep, it asks the GM to decide.
I love this because there’s a lot of discussion these days about games that use Brindlewood Bay‘s mystery system. And while this isn’t the same thing by any means, it’s still mucking around in the same sandbox. Essentially, you could say that games like Brindlewood Bay or Apocalypse Keys are just respecting that time-honoured tradition of storygames and redistributing the role of the GM.
When I read Arcturus Station, I have this lovely premise dripping with potential and I don’t want to puncture it. If I was running this in 2016, I would’ve just used smoke and mirrors – pretended that I knew which suspect did it but really I would just see what my players thought and then use that to decide. (Someone on Bluesky called it “planning behind” rather than “planning ahead” and I find that phrase very funny.) All these new games do as far as I’m concerned is let me be honest about my smoke and mirrors.
But the creativity of Arcturus Station doesn’t stop there, it offers two more ideas, half-baked in that classic old school way but still very endearing: what if the one of the player’s characters did it (makes sense, they have a motive, they just got screwed) and what if instead of playing adventurers, the players took on the role of the NPC suspects and basically larped it.
The designer of this module, J Andrew Keith, doesn’t actually know how to pull either of these two things off. Well, the first one is a bit easier. It just requires planning and collusion between one player and the GM. But the second idea is just tossed in at the very end of the book. All that Keith has got to offer us is: “One other possibility which there was no time to explore in detail here is to dispense with the standard player characters and use the suspects as player characters. Give players the information on Katarin Xuan, Eayukheal, and the others, and have them play those roles; of course, one of them will be the murderer…”
Like with many other art forms, one way to read the history of RPG design is the push and pull of experimentation and consolidation: there are periods of obvious and widespread experimentation and then consolidation as the most popular experiments become the norm. But then people get bored of the norm as it looses the novelty that made it popular in the first place and a new phase of widespread experimentation follows.
It’s never so simple, of course. You can have experimentation in one space and consolidation in the other. But it’s interesting to see the creative overreach of the first decade of RPGs – people imagining possibilities but not really having the tools to implement them. It’s the same spirit that draws me towards the current indie games era (and the Forge era, and so on). It’s excitement for the possibilities of play.
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What would have made the Veilguard companions more compelling?
I keep racking my brain trying to determine how the marketing of this game was so focused on the companions, their rich lives outside of the narrative, and the journeys that they go on when I think that they are objectively the worst written companions to date. Not to say that their appearances aren’t well designed or that they don’t have really fun and cute moments, but they are simply less three-dimensional than previous companions. Fundamentally, my biggest grievance with the Veilguard companions is that I just don’t find any of them nuanced or interesting. They are all good people, but they are not good or believable characters that fit this plot and interact with it in meaningful ways.
I have never been one of those people that ignore canon, but I have been perseverating on the missed potential of this highly anticipated game that we’ve waited ten years for. So, I wanted to criticize some of these characters and explore some changes that might’ve made for a more compelling group of characters had they been written differently, but (hopefully) respecting the vision of who the characters are at their core because I do think that the skeleton of something great is here.
Disclaimer because this is long and critical: There are a lot of spoilers below. I haven’t read all of the Dragon Age books and I could be missing things, but I also think that the game and the characters’ journeys should speak for themselves as we go through the story. I also get that these are just my opinions, I’m a STEM girlie by trade and a creative on the side! Not everything I suggest may be great or realistic for building a plot or realistic for writing the script of a videogame. I also don’t mind conversations about these characters! I think that would be fun, I just don’t want to be shat on for being very disappointed in this game when it’s been my favorite video game series for half my life and I went in very hyped and willing to excuse a lot!
Alright, if you’re still with me, buckle up!
First, before I outline the specific changes I would make to each character, I want to address that there are just flaws with the way BioWare decided to handle companions as a whole in this game. I want to mention them now because they impact nearly every character and I don’t become repetitive:
1. Most importantly, the approval system is pointless and probably could be left out of this game for all it means to the narrative. It is nearly impossible to wrack up disapproval for the companions and you increase approval and bond by just taking companions out and completing a quest. If the companions like nearly everything that Rook does, then it means that they don’t care enough about anything to have strong rigid opinions (which is good for a well-written character). If companions don’t have an opportunity for meaningful agreements or disagreements, it means that the writing is not what people expect of a Dragon Age game based on every single installment we’ve had so far. It is one of the few things that have stayed the same in all of the past games and one of the things that I think fans are really upset about and should have been nonnegotiable.
2. All of the factions (except for maybe the Grey Wardens) really just needed to be messier and more complicated. Not all of the factions were meant to be heroic throughout the series. As others have commented, the Lords of Fortune and the Antivan Crows are the most glaring examples of this. However, I think that the Mournwatch and Veiljumpers are not exempt from this either. The factions serve as crucial parts of our companion’s backstory and by sanitizing them, we are wiping key opportunities for character development. For example, it could be way more interesting to have a character who fundamentally disagrees with their faction, but doesn’t know how to escape it. Or, what about a character who loves their faction and makes us feel conflicted about them because of their willingness to explain away the faction’s history? I could write (another) essay on this, so I’ll leave this point here.
3. We simply needed to have more conversations with all of the companions. All we have are these short, uninteresting cutscenes to learn about the companions. The player should be able to go up to the companions and ask them about the history of their faction, who they trust and care about in their faction (and why), their past, and their opinions about new information (on other companions, side quests, and plot points). None of these even need a cutscene, just voice acting. It would also help players feel more connected to the companions.
4. There needed to be more visible personal and interpersonal conflict. The companions read like coworkers to me. They mostly like each other and, even if they do have disagreements, they are never explored in the narrative. They don’t seem to have any hugely conflicting viewpoints on any topic and, even if they do, they are benign. For example, what to pack for a camping trip or not wanting to talk about a particular topic (dragons vs. spirits) can be interesting in addition to more complex banter but the banter just feels inappropriate and irrelevant for the plot of this game. Overall, the companions rarely make a fit about anything. It feels like the writers didn’t want any character to appear problematic, but they made them flat because none of them seem to have a hill to die on except that they should save the world. This might have been fine in a game series that didn’t focus so heavily on companions and the way that ethics are shaped by personal experience, but this is not that imaginary game series.
5. The companion quests should have focused more on worldbuilding and getting to know the characters. I have little to say about this other than that the quests for Harding to try out her powers, training Assan with Davrin, shopping with Lucanis, and lighting candles with Emmrich, etc. were lazy, uncreative filler. I really cannot put it any other way. They should have all had quests that better explored their faction and, by extension, them. We barely learn anything in those quests and they are time wasters. Those are the scenes that should have been converted to a codex entry, not some of the important lore drops that we currently have in the codex.
6. Rook chooses one option of a binary for every companion towards the end of their personal quests. I’m okay with some of these, I think that it made sense for Bellara and Davrin to ask Rook what to do in their personal quests because it felt more natural. A friend asking a friend for their input. On the other hand, some of these are really inconsequential, semantic, and mindset related (Neve) and others are such personal choices that it feels inappropriate for Rook to be involved (Emmrich and Lucanis). In a lot of these cases, it would have made more sense to have dialogue options sprinkled throughout the game that influenced companions to make their ultimate choices. Giving Rook so much power in these decisions makes the companions feel one-dimensional because it strips them of agency that any believable character would want. Even if they wanted Rook to make these decisions, companions should have felt more strongly towards the options and either praised or disparaged Rook for their decision.
7. Finally, I found all of the romances very lackluster. I was never someone who considered Dragon Age games glorified dating sims (I actually really don’t like that take, even if it's all jokes), but I found myself missing the depth of relationships in previous games. All the relationships felt too new and shallow. Largely, I think this is due to points 3 and 4, but also due to a lack of reactivity with your companions. For example, companions barely acknowledge you getting them a gift or flirting. This could have also been helped by a few extra cutscenes with the companions.
That mostly covers the overarching issues that apply to all characters. Some of these things might come back in my individual discussions of the characters if it is particularly bad.
If you’re still with me, here are my thoughts on each companion and/or what I think would have made them more interesting:
Bellara
I came to like Bellara much more than I anticipated from the trailers and marketing. However, she is really emblematic of how the writers didn’t want problematic characters. There is nothing in the game that would cause people to accuse her of being problematic, but despite being an elf (a historically oppressed and enslaved group), she is so quick to apologize for the actions of ancient elves who oppressed her ancestors thousands of years ago which is ridiculous and solves nothing. It also really seems like the writers wanted her flaw or quirkiness to be some kind of neurodivergence and nerdiness and that alone doesn’t make a compelling character. I actually think it would be interesting if Bellara was, if not pro-Solas, pro-hearing him out because his intentions were in the interest of the elven people even though he made some shitty decisions. I think she would want to be interested in what Solas knew about the ancient elves and what their society looked like before the Veil. I think she’d want to know as much as she could about the technology. I think it would be interesting if she guiltily admitted to wondering what the world would look like if the Veil came down. How different would it really be to what they’re already experiencing? Could they not mitigate the problems? I think this would be an excellent point of tension between Bellara and Davrin (who is Dalish but might not understand her curiosity in the face of the blight) or Harding (whose people were so impacted by Solas and Mythal’s actions… more on Harding later).
Davrin
Davrin is actually my favorite companions in this game, but I still wanted more from him. I think it would be really interesting if, when the team is gathered around after Weisshaupt that Davrin really pushed back against the idea of sorting out their personal shit before progressing. He’s a grey warden who, in his estimation, just failed his one purpose. I think that this would cause a bit of tension between him and some other characters, like maybe Taash whose concerns are more personal than anyone else's at the time. He is serious and straightforward, so I don’t think it’d be out of character and it would make their friendship and training montage more satisfying later on if they had to move on from it. I would also expand on the fact that he was disappointed to not die when he killed one of the archdemons? It was touched on so briefly and he seems to emotionally resolve it in a few dialogue lines which I think is crazy, even considering that he wants to live to save the griffons and raise Assan. A “blow up” about how the team needs to put their personal affairs aside while struggling to keep his own personal affairs together would introduce a little more depth to his plot line and expand on one of the more interesting things about him that we barely got any time with.
Harding
Harding was one of the most boring characters to me in this game because she felt so flat and there were so many ways to make her more interesting. Her character isn’t helped by the Varric twist because the narrative requires that she doesn’t grieve except for one scene despite knowing Varric for at least a decade. Personally, I think that changing her reaction if/when she finds out what Solas and Mythal did to the Titans and her people would make her more well-rounded and believable. From that point on, Harding should be anti-Solas and you should lose approval with her every time you entertain the idea of trusting him. Maybe she could even express disappointment/frustration/sadness for an Inquisitor who believes Solas can be saved or speak of them more highly if they think that he is irredeemable. Also, we should’ve spent more time with her and the dwarven people. I think Veilguard was such a rushed and half-baked attempt at wrapping up that storyline. We learned so much about the dwarves in the last two games and we get to spend so little time with them.
Taash
Interestingly, I think Taash is one of the few companions with really obvious flaws. They are childish and impatient, but they’re poorly written and their flaws are never acknowledged or treated as flaws by the narrative. In my playthrough, their relationship with Harding might have been an interesting place to explore and address that childishness. It was also a missed opportunity for them to explore Qunari and Rivaini culture. As other people have commented, the binary choice between being Rivaini or Qunari is odd in tandem with Taash’s journey of self-discovery and identity. I think that choice shouldn’t exist and should be encouraged by dialogue options peppered throughout their larger quest. We were so close to exploring the rift that can form in families between first generation children and immigrant parents (and learning more about Rivain and the Qun by extension) when there is love but a fundamental difference in culture and lived experience. Instead, I feel like the narrative never gave us a chance to really hear Shathann out before her death, but I’ll give the writers a break because I think that they were going for tragedy and unresolved conflict and I don't know if I trust them to make that a conversation that fits the world and isn't anachronistic.
Emmrich
The thing that bothered me most about the Emmrich storyline was the final choice between Emmrich becoming a lich and bringing back Manfred. This is another choice that Rook should have influenced rather than choose outright. The number of times that you asked probing questions or commented on Emmrich’s desire to become a lich through more conversations about Emmrich’s fear of death and relationship with Manfred should have determined his final decision. Personally, it felt inappropriate for Rook to make that decision directly for him, no matter how much the game tried to justify it. I would have also liked to see his fear of death impact him more throughout his quest line and the narrative. The final quests are literally a suicide mission and he should have had more dialogue regarding it.
Neve
I’m going to admit that Neve was hardened in my playthrough and I haven’t explored her character in playthroughs where you save Dock Town, so this section might not be applicable to half of you. I didn’t understand a lot of Neve’s motivation behind her actions. I didn’t understand why she felt so passionately about her city or her jobs. Her drive felt hollow to me, making her personal quests feel generic. When I got to Neve’s quest where we gathered clues near the water in Dock Town, I was excited to finally learn anything about her, but it was devoid of any meaningful backstory. I would have written the quest to better explore Neve’s past, motivations, and personal relationships. The other big thing that stands out is that Neve is a noir detective and the VA has clearly gotten direction to sound like one, but her story is so devoid of mystery, intrigue, and many of themes that would make that more than aesthetic. And, like, isn’t her whole faction about freeing slaves? Why not make her personal quest more closely tied to that?
Lucanis
Lucanis’ personal quests are so tied to the dynamics of his faction, so I think a lot could have been solved by making the Crows more morally grey. I think Teia and Viago could have stayed the same, but we should have seen more negative interactions between him and the rest of the Crows. Outside of Illario, Catarina would have been an exceptional vessel to explore the problems within the Crows and a theme like generational trauma or exploitation. The party banter between him and Davrin criticizing each other's factions could have been an excellent space to talk about the negative aspects of the Crows and how Lucanis’ feels about them, either defend some misdeeds or express how he feels conflicted about his past contracts. In my game (when you save Treviso), Spite also felt more like a mildly important accessory in Lucanis’ plot than a significant problem. Few characters had anything significant to say about Spite and he caused few problems. I actually thought Spite was fun for most of the game, but he needed to be more problematic because he gave the impression that he was included more to build an aesthetic for Lucanis than a character-defining plot point. Finally, I think Rook deciding what to do with Illario was a poor decision. I would have written this as a decision Lucanis makes on his own based on how Rook encourages him to deal with Spite through a more fleshed out character arc.
This pretty much summarizes my thoughts on all of the companions. As you can tell, I am very Normal about this game.
I wanted to like these characters so much and they have an unbelievable amount of potential. They are all so fascinating in concept and all of them are poorly executed either due to the relationship building mechanics of the game, because of the writing and dialogue, or a mixture of both. That said, there are brief moments when I like them and I get glimpses of what they could’ve been.
I just hope the characters are better explored in future games (if we get one).
#here is my silly little essay critiquing the veilguard companions and what i think would make them more compelling#this is very Normal behavior#dragon age: veilguard#veilguard critical#dragon age critical#bioware critical#datv critical#dragon age
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Omg Till is so cute whattttttt. Excuse my brain rotting I just needed to get this out of my system.
LOOK AT THEM SO CUTE
ALL OF THEM SO CUTE!!!!
Ahem.
Now time for some serious analysis 🧐 (I don’t rlly get anywhere tho so less of an analysis and more just me asking a bunch of questions hoping for an answer from the void)
One thing I noticed aside from how cute Till is his eye bags.
This baby Till doesn’t have eye bags yet, so we can conclude that Till was starting to become sleep deprived after the age of 3 and before the age of 8. (I’m just making a guess based on the pics of their age Till could be 12 in that picture I truly couldn’t tell you)
Now what does this mean when a child is continuously sleep deprived by a stupid alien?
Impacts Behaviors: Harder to pay attention, prone to mood swings, and increased impulsivity (Yep that’s Till)
Impacts Mental Health: Increases the risk and severity of depression and anxiety (What do you know that’s also Till!)
Impacts Brain Development: Negatively affects the memory and intelligence parts of the brain (Do you guys remember that brain scan that showed a brain suffering from trauma?)
As you can see from an early age Till was already put through the wringer before he even got a bruise. I say this because sleep deprivation is extremely torturous regardless of whether it’s forced or self inflicted. Mentally and physically not getting enough sleep fucks up every aspect of your life. The lack of sleep could be bc Till was staying up late, it was noted by other Anakt kids that Till kept them up at night bc he was practicing his music. It could also be bc Urak forced him to stay awake.
Like when he made Till watch videos of a younger Luka. Overall my heart broke once again at the way they treat a literal baby. Another thing I want to point out is their necks.
I’m leaving out Ivan cuz he doesn’t wear the collar anyways. But Mizi and Sua both wear the standard (I’m assuming standard bc they’re the most common) collars both lit up green. They’re living in a little bubble and while they look cute, knowing how their story goes makes them look uncanny. Anyways this is the collar most of the kids wear.
But Till is wearing a different collar and also is wearing a green patch. It always made me curious why he has different collars compared to the rest. Like I get it’s bc of the fact that he rebels a lot so he has a lot more restraints. But this collar is thinner and more metallic than the other ones. You’d think that if they were trying to punish him more they’d give him a bigger collar or a more restrictive one. They forced him into one that restrains his arm to his torso and one over his mouth. But this is just a thin collar that he wears on stage and it doesn’t seem to have any function other than to be a small collar. It also doesn’t show a mood indicator like the other ones do. I guess bc Urak doesn’t care what Till is feeling so he didn’t bother getting that feature. But it also makes it ambiguous what Till is feeling. In the picture while Mizi and Sua look happy, and Ivan looks focused, Till looks shocked and perplexed about writing in the air. (And adorable but when doesn’t he look adorable?) Anyways I can’t for the life of me figure out why his loser alien would get a custom collar that is so simple. From what I’ve gathered abt that freak he grew up in the slums but due to his greedy nature and inability to have compassion was able make it big by doing illegal shit. So maybe it was cost effective to just make simple collars instead of getting the standard one? What a cheap bastard.
Another thing that confuses me is the green patch on his neck.
Just what is this? My first thought went to nicotine patches and insulin patches. But those aren’t suppose to go on the neck, usually on the arm. Then as I did my daily watch of Round 6 I noticed that Till has been injected with unknown substances through his neck.
My guess is that the green patches are injecting him with some type of drug. And because the skin around the neck is so fragile the drugs can seep through easier. (It’s completely unsafe but in line with how the loser alien acts)
There are two possible explanations.
One is that Till has become addicted to the drugs they pump him with. And in order to keep him normal and keep him from showing withdrawal signs they use the green patches like a nicotine patch. Drugs have been used by artists as a way to further their craft. Some have even become reliant on it in order to make art. There’s a sense of enlightenment as well, some use it as a way to gain a new perspective on life. I personally can’t understand using drugs for that purpose, but some of the greatest works of art have been created through the use of substances like these. So it’s possible that Urak in his attempt to create a weapon that could topple Luka tries to make Till produce songs using that method. Such as injecting a bunch of drugs and leaving him in a room to write songs.
Two is that they use the green patch as a way to sedate Till, or as a way to enhance his performance. As evident by just looking at Till you can tell he’s running on fumes when he’s on stage. So maybe as a way to push past his limit they drug him so that he can keep performing even when his body is at its limit. The patches are only seen in Round 2 but that could explain why Till got a nosebleed when he was performing in Round 7. His body was finally catching up to him.
Alternatively they could just be there to cover up the wounds from injections while also looking cool lol.
As you can tell I am very confused ;-; but also very curious abt these experiments. They seemed to be focused on the throat and mouth which makes me think they’re trying to modify how these kids sing. Like are they trying to make it so that they can sing outside of their vocal range? Are they trying to make it so that they can sing without having to breath? Or maybe the drugs can affect their literal genes. I know human editing is a procedure in Alien stage universe but what does that actually mean? Can you edit their appearance? Their personality? Their memory? Their thoughts?
My attempts at analysis have only left me with more questions.
Thanks for reading byeeeeee
#alien stage#alnst till#alnst ivan#alnst mizi#alnst sua#alien stage till#till my baby what did they do to you
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Rude Hylian: that water control doesn't look very threatening, and it wouldn't be useful in an area without water, so what are you going to do with that size and useless power, huh?
reader developing a branch of waterbending called 'bloodbending': (・▽・)
It would also be funny if the chain was in danger, many enemies, few supplies, weapons are exhausted, Hyrule is about to collapse and suddenly reader is like 'The Windows operating system has been updated'
This is so funny to me, but I think I ended up writing something more serious hehe Ah, I think today is thanksgiving for you guys, so happy thanksgiving ;)
I felt my body burning and my head buzzing, when the sound of the environment was nothing more than a great confusion. A hot liquid ran down my head, which throbbed with pain. My blurred vision could barely notice as the blond heroes fought not far from me.
Unfortunately, they were all too busy to help me. Each one had to deal with one or more enemies, I could feel their worried looks at me, but they couldn’t leave there to help me. The biggest problem was the member of the Yiga clan who was coming towards me. The same one who attacked me.
Normally, I could easily help them with this using my waterbending, but unfortunately for me, we were in a dry region now. We were heading towards the Gerudo Desert when we were caught in this ambush, and the mountains we were crossing weren’t exactly a good representative of water. Shit.
I managed to get up, still a little dizzy, but able to stay on my feet and try to face my enemy. He laughed, laughed at my attempt to keep fighting.
— Don’t bother, girl. We knew very well that with water you would be a threat, that’s why we made sure you passed through here. Here you are nothing more than a defenseless little girl.
He said, laughing at my face as if I were a big joke. Little shit. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the boys try to come to me, but they were automatically stopped by a Yiga. Fucking cowards, they ran away to the desert so they wouldn’t have to face me.
My blood boiled, anger took over me, I wanted so much to end these idiots. I wanted to drown them in water, kick their asses, make them regret their choices.
— There’s no point in trying, you won’t-
— Shut the fuck up! – I interrupted him. My body acted on impulse, I moved so naturally that I couldn’t even think, all I know is that, with one movement of mine, the Yiga was kneeling, writhing in pain.
Did I do that? Instincts, that was all the information I had. And, somehow, that was enough to make me able to control a person. Or rather, control the blood, the liquids, that are in their body. Cool.
I couldn’t help but smile wryly, it seems that not even in a place without water can they stand against me. Now consciously, I moved my hands, still based entirely on instincts, and threw the Yiga away, making him fly out of sight.
This isn’t as easy as normal waterbending, it requires more effort, but I feel like I’m adapting to it. I managed to stop the blood that was running down my face, eliminating my dizziness, and turned to the Yigas who were attacking the heroes. They seemed to be able to handle it, but it doesn’t hurt to help them.
One by one, I levitated and threw them away, leaving them unconscious. I know I could do much worse with bloodbending, but I don’t want to lose control, I don’t even know how I’m doing it yet. In the end, I managed to get rid of the remaining enemies, allowing this tiring battle to end.
— How the fuck did you do that?! – Was the first thing the Veteran asked. I just shrugged, also not knowing the answer.
— Are you okay? – Hyrule said, coming towards me. The poor guy looked like he was done for after using so much of his magic when some of his brothers were hit during the fight.
— It’s okay, I managed to stop the bleeding. Sorry, I don’t know if I can heal you without water...
— Is there water in my canteen, is that enough? – The Rancher asked, offering his canteen to me.
— For healing? I think so.
— That was so cool! Tell me more about how it happened? – Wind asked excitedly, making me laugh.
— Let’s fix you guys first, okay?
#link x reader#linked universe x reader#linked universe#tloz#linked universe fanfic#lu x reader#legend of zelda#x reader
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if youre still taking prompts, could i request 19 with 12!donnie and metalhead— i’ve been missing those two a bit haha
19 = ⚡️-> High voltage
“Hey bud.”
Metalhead chirps as Donnie pats his head, speaking through a yawn. “Yeah, I’m back up. Robot’s not gonna built itself.”
Metalhead trails him to his desk. Donnie picks up the sketchbook, carapace scratching the wood as he sits down beside it. The pen taps his cheek mindlessly. He leans the paper towards the watching companion, asking, “Look good?”
Metalhead raises a hand and touches the paper.
Donnie sighs, “Yeah, me neither.”
He taps the sketchbook against his forehead a few times before he stands. “Back to work.”
Metalhead is there when he stumbles, providing a head for him to catch his balance on. A soft chirp as he goes over to the generator on his desk, but Donnie only opens his toolbox. “Don’t worry about it. Just been a long night.”
He stops at his side to peek over the desk. Then he looks at Donnie. His creator nods drowsily, “Fine, long nights. Really, Metalhead, I’m perfectly capable of missing a few hours.”
When he reaches over, his hand bumps the toolbox and knocks it to the floor. He stares at it, shoulders slumped, as Metalhead begins picking up the tools. Metal hands offer the red container.
Donnie takes it. “Thanks. Gotta watch what I’m doing.”
He places it on his desk and pulls out a screwdriver. Metalhead watches him work for a while, catching every mistake and fumble, patient when his hands shake. His creator slams his fist on the desk and it knocks the pile of the books off the other side.
Metalhead sets a hand on his arm. He takes a deep breath, brushes at his eyes, and says, “I can do this.”
Metalhead takes his word for it and shifts his attention on the mess. He walks away as his creator pulls out a pair of pliers, examining the machine. He picks them up and turns, a danger symbol taking over his vision when Donnie moves to cut the active wire.
The hardcovers hit the floor, the pliers start to slice through, and then Metalhead is ramming his shoulder into Donnie’s plastron. His creator hits the ground, crying out in anger, and Metalhead’s hand closes around the grips, accidentally finishing the job.
The power surge hits his systems all at once. His screen goes wild, decorated in Human and Kraang, and then everything shuts down-
-to power back up a moment later in suboptimal condition.
His fuzzy vision slowly sorts itself out, fingers glitching when he tries to turn his head. His chirp crackles when he tries to speak, frantic screen failing to get a lock on his creator’s expression.
“I did it!” He gasps, shaky hands cupping his head. “Oh, buddy, you’re okay. I cannot believe I was so- but I can fix this. I can fix this.”
Metalhead’s voice box crackles. Donnie smiles, eyes covered by a sheen of liquid. “You scared me. How long did you know it was on?”
He tries to speak. His leg lifts in an awkward position.
Donnie wipes away the gloss and pulls out his tools. “Right. Right. Priorities. I’m sorry, bud. This was my bad. What was I thinking?”
He continues to ask rhetorical questions as he works. Metalhead answers once his voice box functions properly, helping to recode his processor. Once they’re finished with major repairs, he chirps a command and starts walking.
“Metalhead?” He hesitates. Metalhead does not stop. “Where are you…?”
He leaves the lab and goes into the bedroom. He waits in the dark until his creator creeps in, looking around blankly. “What’s in here?”
He points at the bed. His creator sighs. “Metalhead…”
He goes to pull back the covers. He looks at him expectantly.
After a long beat of consideration, Donnie comes over. He lays down reluctantly, eyes already half shut, and says, “I have too much to do.”
Metalhead tucks the blanket over his shoulders.
“I’m going to let them down.”
He pats his shell as he’d seen his brothers do.
“I can’t…” He trails off. Metalhead plants himself by the bed.
He remains there until the evening. Any creature that attempts to cross the threshold is reminded of the extensive weaponry that he bears. After all, Metalhead is made to help and protect.
And sometimes a creator needs protection from himself.
Thinking about Metalhead Rewired. Emotions all over the place. I didn’t know I needed this pain today. Thank you!!! 💜💛
#ImagionationStation’s Ficlets#tmnt 2k12#tmnt 2012#teenage mutant ninja turtles 2012#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt fandom#donnie 2012#tmnt donnie 2012#tmnt 2012 donnie#2012 donnie#2012 donatello#tmnt metalhead#metalhead 2012#2012 metalhead#2012 tmnt#donnie tmnt 2012#tmnt fanfiction#tmnt fic#ask game
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"Awakening the Sleeping Giant"
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flings my creation into the unknown
the brain worms have gotten too powerful and I’m simultaneously dying of skystar disease of so have this 1400-ish-word Fucking Thing™ based on @keferon's mecha AU featuring human!starscream as the the little bastard you can't live with but also can't live without, and skyfire/jetfire as the unfortunate victim of Fate Being a Real Bitch Sometimes and accidentally deciding the outcome of the Space Race
"ulchtar" as a name for human!Starscream was borrowed from starscream's early name (and also Skybound)
also i don’t remember if the corporation that produces mechs in this au was ever properly given a name so i just kinda. gave them a generic one lol
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Ulchtar is a mechanical engineer working on developing spacefaring mecha. He’s climbed through the ranks based on his expertise (and, occasionally by sabotaging other peoples’ work). Nobody really likes working with him; he’s kind of an ass at the best of times. But his experience with these systems makes him a danger if the company ever lets him go. He could sell his knowledge to anyone else in the world, creating new competition in a sector they’ve more-or-less monopolized. This keeps him from being kicked out…up until Mecha-Corp’s first voyage into the stars goes horribly wrong. After the disappearance of Jazz, the fingers are pointed at him, even though—for once in his life—he’s actually not to blame. It’s decided that he’s no longer useful, and he needs to be disposed of.
Ulchtar doesn’t know this, of course. Not until—after being called into a meeting in one of the downstairs labs—the door to go back upstairs locks itself, and he hears the telltale, unholy screeches of alien beasts around him. The beasts he has helped contain for years.
“…shit. Shit shit shit shit shitshitshitshitshit—”
He starts running. Not upstairs, that’s not an option, but maybe there’s another way out of here. He finds that the door upstairs is locked, but not the way down, and that means there’s still a chance, because if there’s anything the higher-ups here right about, it was the fact that Ulchtar knows way too much.
In a last, desperate attempt to survive (or at least go down swinging) Ulchtar decides to unleash his final gambit. He runs down long-forgotten halls, hurls himself downstairs until he reaches the lowest floor of the facility—a floor where nobody goes. It’s down here that he’ll make his stand and wake up an old “friend.”
The few who know it exists call it the “Sleeping Giant.” Corny name, but it made sense, given it's…well, fucking gigantic, maybe even bigger than Vortex. It was found buried in the Arctic in the mid-1950’s—what looked to be an ancient, alien shuttle, lost under the ice for perhaps millions of years. It was all kept hush-hush, but in secret, its discovery had turned the tides of the Space Race…and when it fell into the hands of what would soon become Mecha-Corp, they quickly learned it was much more than a vessel. It was alive.
Some of the earliest mechs? The huge, bulky ones that never ended up getting mass-produced because it wasn’t economical enough? They owed their design to the Giant. They owed their existence to the many times it had been torn apart and put back together to see how it worked, to the many years it had laid on a table inert, unaware of what humanity had done to it. It was their greatest trade secret.
And the Giant owes its currently-intact state to Ulchtar, who’d thought studying it as a whole was more useful than research on individual parts. Which is the only reason he knows, at least in theory, how to power it on. Hell, he’d even done some refurbishments when nobody was looking. He runs across a table far too big for him, pulling out cables and unlocking restraints. He doesn’t have time for final checks, not with a horde of kaiju bearing down on him. He just has to hope, to scream until he makes the stars hear his name—or he dies trying.
"COME ON!" He shouts. "WAKE UP, YOU OVERSIZED SUNOVA--"
At that moment, the stars respond.
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He can’t move.
He’s freezing cold.
Is he dead?
How did he get here?
He’s…he was…looking for something, he’s pretty sure. Something very important.
Something so important he’d risk getting trapped under an ice sheet over it.
Who is he? He's not sure.
He wants to go home, but he can’t remember where that’s supposed to be.
Trying to remember hurts too much.
It’s hard to think like this, when he’s so cold and everything hurts and he’s so tired.
He lets himself drift, fluttering in and out of death-dreams that he can barely recall.
Eventually, after he’s lost count of the cycles, something happens. The dim light filtering through the ice gets brighter. Small creatures—the lifeforms of this planet, he thinks—peer down at him, pointing, shouting, but he is too weak to respond.
He has hope, for a brief moment, when he sees the sun again, but those hopes are quickly dashed—once more he’s trapped in walls and ceilings of white and gray. This time, the prison is own body. He’s escaped the glacier, only to find himself paralyzed and comatose. Occasionally he laspses into consciousness just long enough to steal a few kliks of awareness before he falls back into darkness.
At some point, he feels himself revert to ‘bot mode, which is something he'd forgotten he even had until then. He’s vaguely aware that he is being picked apart and put back together by the scavengers, again and again and again. The dull ache of not being whole is the only reason he knows he’s still alive, if this can still be called living.
And then…something changes. Everything goes dark for a very long time. The next time he’s aware of anything, his first realization is that he doesn’t hurt. He doesn’t feel broken. His arms respond when he tries to move.
What?
He sits up, still in something of a daze, taking in the surroundings. It’s a room seemingly sized for mechs, and yet the furniture strewn about is far too small—maybe meant for the scavengers? He has little time to wonder about the whole situation, because he soon hears them—the distant, telltale sounds of Quintessons approaching. He remembers what those are, in a way that’s almost instinctive.
To his right, though, he hears a small screaming noise. A lone organic is shouting something at him almost hysterically, pointing at the entrance before gesturing wildly, and then pointing up at the ceiling. It runs over to a set of controls, pushing at buttons furiously until the ceiling begins to open up. Once again, he sees the sky and feels something like hope.
Then tentacles lash out from behind the entrance, and he remembers this is no time for sentiment. He picks the organic up, deciding to just plop the creature inside his cockpit where’s it’s relatively safe and jump for it. He doesn’t trust the creature, not for a second, but he needs someone to explain what’s going on. Engines flare to life for the first time in millions of years, and he hears horrific screeches as Quintesson flesh is cooked under the heat from his thrusters.
They sail up and up and up until there’s no walls anymore and that feeling of suffocating is gone and it’s warmer than anything he’s felt in millions of cycles and he’s alive.
He lets himself spin a few times in the air. He’s above the clouds and the sun feels like fire on his still-frigid wings but somehow that’s good, it feels right. He wants to just hover here and bask in it forever.
He realizes why the creature is kicking him when gunfire whizzes past his face, followed by a pair of aircraft piloted by the scavengers.
Are the scavengers after him? Or the one he’s holding onto? He’s not really sure, but he also really doesn’t want to find out.
He transforms, looking for any way to shake them off. It becomes a mad, spiraling dance as he tries to avoid getting shot, to mixed results.
He considers the enemy’s design—these aircraft don’t look like they’re meant for spaceflight. Knowing that, he climbs higher and higher, looking to get above these things’ maximum operating altitude. He flinches as a few bullets scratch and tear at him, but doesn’t stop. This eventually pays off, as he sees his pursuers begin to stall out, dropping away behind him.
He hopes his scavenger didn’t get too sick in the cockpit. That’d be a mess to clean up…
…Primus, why am I worrying about that at a time like this? He laughs to himself, though this high up, the air is so thin that it’s barely audible.
He looked down at the planet below—dusk was soon to fall on this side of the world, and he needed to find somewhere to hide.
“…where do I even go from here?”
A knock from the organic, who held up what looked like a tiny datapad with a nervous grin.
Maybe they had an idea?
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part 2
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I'm straight up frothing in the mouth for these
🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲
🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️🧜♂️
⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️⚖️
YAY! That makes me so happy.
36 for 🌲:
---
“That was more about you than me, so…”
“Don’t do this,” Eddie sighs.
“Do what?” Buck demands.
“This thing you do, where you only acknowledge other people’s problems, like your own feelings aren’t important,” Eddie says.
Buck sighs. “Sometimes I make everything about me, sometimes I don’t make enough about me. Can’t win with you.”
Eddie scowls at him. “You’re deflecting.”
Another sigh.
“Eddie, really. I’m okay. Is the hearing stuff a lot right now? Obviously, yeah. Am I crushed about Tommy? I mean… He already reacted like shit to my hearing loss, so… I don’t know. I think I’m mostly just pissed you were hurt.”
“I’m okay,” Eddie says. It’s a lie. He’s not okay. But that’s not exactly Tommy’s fault, is it? “I mean, I did that to him, right? If your research is right.”
Buck looks torn.
“Look,” he exhales. “I don’t know how much agency Tommy had in what he did. But I know you had none, right?”
“I mean… I shouldn’t have let him in.”
Buck scoffs. “You should be able to open your door to a friend without worrying about that happening.”
“Except apparently not,” Eddie says. “Because apparently this is what I am.”
---
15 for 🧜♂️:
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So Eddie tries to figure it out.
“So you’re from Pennsylvania,” Eddie says, when they leave Maddie’s apartment. A fact he didn’t know until the two of them mentioned Hershey in conversation.
“Yeah,” Buck nods. “We are.”
“Why did you leave?” Eddie asks.
“Uh…” Buck trails off a little. “Just… Well, I just had to get out. Get away from my parents. Figure out who I am.”
Okay, yeah. All the pieces are fitting together pretty well.
“That’s hard to do, if you don’t have the right support system,” Eddie nods.
---
27 for ⚖️:
---
How horrible. To need this.
“Yeah, this is just a random coupon,” Lawrence says when Buck finds himself back in reality.
“Oh, man. Sorry,” Buck says. “My bad. Guess I should’ve taken a closer look.”
Lawrence looks annoyed.
“Guess there isn’t much reading involved in putting out fires,” he grumbles.
Buck forces a smile, resisting the urge to make a comeback about how much time to read he will have once in jail.
“Guess not,” he replies tightly. “Bye, Larry.”
“It’s Lawrence,” he grits back.
“Right. Right,” Buck shrugs. “See you around.”
Or on the news. Whichever.
⚖️
Back in his apartment, Buck paces. He has a pretty significant dilemma on his hands. Beyond just the Nemesis thing as a whole. It fucking sucks in general, but more specifically, it sucks because of what he knows it means about Tommy.
He doesn’t have to do anything about it right this minute. The job is not to track down people and distribute justice. That’s Nemesis’ job. To look for the really bad ones.
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My thoughts on the High King/High Queen of Prythian Argument:
I am currently reading A Court of Silver Flames and have not finished it has not been confirmed to me through reading that Eris has killed Beron yet, so until then and Eris can reform the Autumn Court, these are my final scorings.
To preface this, I currently like how there is a seven court system for Prythian in the books, as the lands are a continent, not a country. In addition, it would be impractical and inefficient for there to be a “high king or queen” of Prythian as the geopolitical system and issues would be far too difficult and incredibly complex, giving its high chance of collapse under the sheer weight of whoever ends up ruling on the throne.
This being said, many arguments have been made on who is going to be the high king/queen among the high lords and I believe I’ve figured out, if there was to be a high king/queen, who would be the best to sit on the throne and bear the title.
So here we go:
7: Rhysand
At number seven we have Rhysand. I know I’m about to get a supreme amount of hate for this, but hear me out. Most of his people hate him, including the Court of Nightmares and others, including Hewn City. His armies aren’t loyal in places like Hewn city or the Court of Nightmares because of his treatment of them, and I haven’t even mentioned how he treats women.
This man took over FIVE HUNRED YEARS TO REALIZE that Illyrian men’s treatment of Illyrian women was too harsh. He put in place laws to stop wing clipping and to allow women to own property and business, but there was a fatal flaw in his lawmaking process. He didn’t enforce it.
It had already taken over 500 years to make proper laws to prohibit the mistreatment of Illyrian women, but he doesn’t even enforce the laws he put in place, basically rendering them useless. And the Illyrian men don’t even care, they just carry on with the treatment, only now they can get caught but not much would be done about it regardless as Rhysand never visits to do a welfare check.
And don’t get me started on Velaris or Illyrian reproductive rights.
6: Beron
There are many others who could go here but I’m putting Beron. The reason he isn’t at the bottom is because his court doesn’t completely hate him.
However, his prominent issues are clear within his court. There is a clear divide in privilege between classes, a classist system, clearly enforced by him. And as far as I’m concerned, this man doesn’t care for child safety laws (based on how he treated his dead son’s deaths after their subsequent murders) and murder. Since he clearly doesn’t care for the lower class, there could be horrific crimes against them, such as what happened to Jesminda.
His entire court, including his advisors and emissaries, are all toxic, backstabbing individuals who couldn’t care less about anyone besides themselves, which is what Beron intended.
The only reason he isn’t lower is because his court is still decently stable and doesn’t look like it’s going to collapse due to the obscene laws created by the high lord or BEHAVIOR exhibited by the high lord.
Once Eris kills Beron then perhaps the court will be reformed and this rating could be changed but until then this is my opinion.
5: Tarquin
Now I love Tarquin, he’s my favorite character out of everyone in this series, but there are some extremely flawed political matters that have landed the Summer Court so low.
Here are the Positives:
Tarquin, as the youngest high lord, has a more modern viewpoint than any of the other high lords.
Tarquin wants to abolish classism in his court, he wishes to merge the higher and lower classes into a single body, for there to be little to no tension between them. This is a very different view than what the other high lords have conjured for their courts.
He also takes in refugees from spring after Feyre destroys the Spring Court, implying the reconstruction and beginning rehabilitation of his court, including the deep care he has for both his subjects, and refugees that may be in harms way. He offers them benefits and a way to live with less fear than they had, which I admire about him. He seems to be a very kind-hearted high lord.
However,
Flaws:
He’s too trusting, as exhibited when Feyre visits the Summer Court for the first time. He trusts her immediately, causing him to have a piece of the Summer Court stolen and diplomatic declaration of perhaps even war on his hands due to the actions of another court because of how trusting he is. This boils over when he sends blood rubies to the night court to show his distaste, displeasure, and a ban from returning to the Summer Court overall.
He is also too forgiving, as exhibited when he forgives Feyre for the blood rubies without an explanation. I can’t tell if that is SJM’s intention, or if Tarquin is just that naïve.
In addition, he has a weak military. This is exhibited during the war with Hybern, as his forces cannot properly hold their own and the Summer Court gets heavily damaged due to it.
He is also the youngest high lord, at only eighty years, he hasn’t lived long enough, or been the high lord for long enough to fully grasp his position and the power it holds, along with the power his subjects hold. His modern views are nice, but he isn’t experienced, which can and has caused tensions and fatal flaws in his rulings.
Tarquin is a good example of a good person, just not entirely fit to rule, which isn’t his fault given Amarantha’s whole “I’m gonna be high queen shtick” with her murdering his parents and relatives, causing him to have to become high lord.
4: Tamlin
Now I just KNOW I’m going to get hate for putting him as fourth on this list, but if the shoe fits 🤷
Tamlin was a decent high lord before Amarantha and Feyre came into the equation. Even when Amarantha came into play, he welcomed in refugees from all over the continent, especially the Summer Court, as if you recall, Alis and her boys were from there.
Not only that, Tamlin’s people were extremely loyal to him, his emissaries were loyal enough to GO OVER THE WALL AND GET KILLED FOR HIM. That is how loyal they were.
(And another thing, because there were refugees from all over Prythian in the Spring Court, they celebrated other courts’s holidays and traditions, as a form of respect.)
He had reformed the once slavery-ridden court his father ran, effectively destroying the concept and acceptance of slavery. He reformed his court to be nothing like the court his father tan, but more alike to what his mother would’ve approved if she were still living.
However, Tamlin’s easy ability to get manipulated and gaslighted is very troubling and important to include in here. Because of this, his court is falling and his people have become disloyal. His self-destructive, and generally destructive tendencies must also be raised in alarm as he drove his sentries out by shapeshifitng into wild form and becoming a beast. He also was just generally self-destructive and dangerously suicidal when we last saw him.
In the past he was a good high lord, but now? He needs a good healing arc before he can properly rule again. He needs to be able to make himself better than he currently is, meaning in the future he’ll NEED a support system to help him reach that. Until then, he stands at fourth place.
3: Kallias and Viviane
These two are so politically inclined that it makes me incredibly relieved that some high lord and lady in Prythian is finally getting forcing and regulating laws, not only that, but reviewing previous laws and adjusting them to fit the newer values of the court to part of the people’s values too.
Speaking of their people, they listen to their people and they care, they let their people speak to them trustingly, giving them hope and encouragement that their high lord and lady will listen to their issues and find a viable solution.
They’re both politically strong people given Viviane held the court up on her back for fifty years while Kallias went UTM to help protect and keep a watchful eye on his people and other citizens of Prythian.
They also are decent at making deals and alliances with other courts, which is a very good thing considering how much war this continent goes through on the regular.
But here are their issues:
They have a weak military, as it’s mentioned during the war with Hybern how their forces might be able to hold off Hybern’s forces and help, but that they’re small and not very powerful. This is a very prominent issue as an improper military could lead to the collapse of their entire court.
And with the other courts there are some tensions mentioned? Such as between them and the night court, as Rhysand’s actions UTM were less than pleasant.
With that being said, they would making promising rulers, which is why they take the third spot in the top three for now, this is until we hear any more about their court in future books.
2: Helion
Now Helion and Kallias & Viviane’s spots on this chart could flip flop depending on what he opens in the future books, but until then, this is my placement.
Helion’s court is not only rich in magic, but it’s rich in information. Don’t forget this man being the second oldest high lord.
Magic is very prominent in the Day Court, the Fay Court itself being the most magically driven court, leading me to assume that’s a large part of the infrastructure and economic system.
But it is also mentioned how the Day Court has the biggest and most libraries in all of Prythian. That is a lot of reading material, meaning a lot of information, which is valuable.
Helion is older and wiser, he’s seen a lot in his days as the High Lord of the Day Court, meaning he’s much more experienced than many of the other high lords. He’s dealt with war before several times and he knows how to handle himself and his court.
That being said, there’s also some not so great parts of him being the High Lord of Day. . .namely his actions.
Sure, Helion is nice, but he’s also incredibly sexual. He can be serious, we’ve seen that, but he is known as the high lord who sleeps around. Not exactly the nicest title to be given. He needs to be able to be more mature sex miss given his age, especially around other diplomats, such as high lords.
In addition, we don’t know much about his military, which is disappointing to me as it’s a large component on whether one’s court can hold its own. Without a proper military, the Day Court could be in shambles. Luckily, it seems like the court does have a good military, it just hasn’t been mentioned. But I’m the future, knowing how efficient his military is would certainly help in my scoring of the Day Court as a whole.
AND FINALLY
1: Thesan
Hear me out, he would be the best candidate for High King of Prythian.
As previously stated, he has a strong military, loyal and dedicated. His husband is literally their general, so he’s constantly well informed on it.
He might not be one of the older of the high lords, but it is implied how he has much expertise politically and morally.
Another large part of Thesan is how the Dawn Court is known as the most neutral court in Prythian. This is an incredibly important position for his court to be in, as a strong military and strong neutrality is a great defense for his court, not to mention when Dawn helped during the war with Hybern, Dawn’s reinforcements of the Seraphim military were mentioned to have helped push back and eventually defeat Hybern.
Dawn also held the meeting between all the high lords, giving Thesan the upper hand as the host to have executive authority as it’s HIS COURT.
Their neutrality is incredibly important as it’s kept them out of trouble for most of the series so far, and I sincerely hope SJM keeps it that way. We haven’t gotten to know Thesan and the Dawn Court well enough as they haven’t been mentioned since the war with Hybern.
Also, just personal opinion, gay high king. He would totally legalize gay marriage, prove me wrong.
Again, these are my opinions, and if you’d like to be an ass about them, then click off of this post. This is just what has been on my mind since I’ve seen others on tumblr debating who the High King of Prythian would be.
That’s all for today, Mono out ✌️
#a court of thorns and roses#thesan acotar#thesan#high lord helion#helion acotar#helion spell cleaver#helion#rhysand#feyre archeron#viviane#tarquin acotar#tamlin#tamlin acotar#kallias#kallias x viviane#kallias acotar#beron vanserra#beron acotar#eris vanserra#eris acotar#high lords#prythian#high king of prythian#My personal opinions#If you don’t like it#you can leave#:)#This took me 45 min to type#Ur welcome
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“Caring about my looks has diminishing returns after the five-minute mark,” another commented. “I genuinely think my quality of life would be better if I didn’t care at all. Thinking about it too much makes me miserable.” Many who identified as average-looking regret the financial cost of upkeep. “Money spent on [beauty] in my early 20s could have been much better invested so that I was experiencing much more financial freedom now that I’m divorced,” said one, while another noted she was “still paying off Botox injections because I had to use credit. It was a terrible decision.” Some of the most striking insights came from those who self-identified as ugly. “Being aware of how society works starts, in my opinion, with finding out that you’re conventionally unattractive,” a participant shared. “It’s easier to get out of the system (as much as I can) when you know it doesn’t benefit you as much anyway.” Learning about beauty culture and diet culture, they said, has made them “more proactive in changing [their] life instead of just quietly adhering to societal standards”. Plenty of people reasonably said they see participation in beauty culture as an act of survival. But, as one person pointed out, “Being the most beautiful woman in the world will not [lead to] a true, healthy inner life.” Finally, one respondent celebrated “letting go” of aesthetic labor – and the low self-esteem that came with it. “It turns out everyone loves me the same,” she said. I think the only way to reconcile your dual desires for interrogating beauty culture and for pretty privilege, Not That Girl, is to acknowledge the paradox of possessing beauty: it may improve your life in certain ways, but at a price. Unfortunately, accepting this tension won’t necessarily resolve it. Beauty culture is everywhere, and it’s pretty persuasive. Knowing it exists is just the first step; resisting it is much harder. But I find the work of divesting from beauty culture has a higher return on investment than the effort I used to put into, say, memorizing the properties of cosmetic chemicals. And for what it’s worth, I earn more money now and am in a healthy relationship. Beyond your college campus, there is a world full of less-than-stunning people leading wonderful lives. No matter what you look like, this is available to you, too.
I want to ignore beauty culture. But I’ll never get anywhere if I don’t look a certain way | Well actually | The Guardian
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Honestly i’m starting to think his parents don’t even live with him or have passed away, probably the former. This does explain a lot about his behaviour from a psychological standpoint
1. Carmine is shown to have anger issues and attention span issues (ADHD? Unstable anger, perhaps bipolar but not enough info given)
2. He does not know how to take care of himself and DOESN’T. He’s obviously still alive and someone is paying his highschool tuition and he’s not unemployed at all so how is that being paid?
And that brings me to my third point, highschool
With the system of school in japan, high school isn’t mandatory. You can go directly to work.
hyde, tsurugi, seth and carmine are all students of the same highschool. Seth has not been shown in his uniform but tsurugi and hyde go to the same school + carmine (tsurugi and carmine having the most similar uniform, but they’re in two different years AND carmine was probably wearing a uniform for autumn / winter in his official art). And with background info from phonon chronicle mode we can deduce it’s most likely a private school or an A school( A school meaning the hardest school to get into through exams, there’s also a B and C school in one district.) (being a school for rich and smart people.) but it’s a bit hard to tell since of how close the highschool is in proximity to phonon’s junior high so that’s a bit harder to tell. Phonon says in the english localisation chronicle mode (part3) that for you to attend Tsurugi’s school(same one hyde, car, seth), you need to be “super smart and super rich” to be here and the school was built recently, implying it’s a private school but again, there’s still some nuances.
Now, with how Carmine is with school— why is he choosing to attend highschool? He doesn’t need to. He could immediately go work, or at least stay unemployed. Now this is where I believe his parents come in.
His parents are obviously incredibly neglectful since they have done nothing about Carmine’s behavioural issues and he’s gotten caught for them before! In fact, his teachers had advised him to take up martial arts or boxing. So, they’re willing to send Carmine to a rich and prestigious highschool, but doesn’t care for his behaviour or grades??
It’s pretty weird, yeah.
Another thing: carmine is decently smart, street wise. We don’t know too much book wise, but we can assume he’s rather smart, he just doesn’t apply himself at all. After all, he had to have gotten into that school somehow. Also, in his chronicle mode, he just randomly pulls out the greek word for ape/money “pithecus” as a suffix for one of his insults when talking about the first in birth he encountered. And the fact he used it as a suffix meant he had heard some of the taxonomic names it is used as a suffix in, and remembered.
He’s clearly knowledgeable animal biology in general, though tends to focus on marine stuff
Jeez. Carmine as a character has so much potential and so many plot holes i just must know about but fpan doesn’t do shit so. Wow
love how Carmine’s parents are so neglectful and non-present that the only thing we even know about them is that they don’t feed him, so he has to buy his dinners from the local convenience store
(honestly, after learning this, I have to say it’s suprising that he isn’t even more fucked up than he already is)
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