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emma-m-black · 6 months ago

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The Daughter - Chapter Two

Tim Gutterson x OC (FanFiction) - MATURE 18+

Tim Gutterson comes to the unconventional aid of one Elenora Crowder, ward of Art Mullen and daughter of Raylan Givens.

This will be a multi chapter story and will get spicy as it goes. This is a rough draft and only slightly edited for grammar and spelling. Just needed to finally get it out because Tim Gutterson is one of my favorite characters, and there is not nearly enough fanfic for him.

Author Master List

Chapter One, Chapter Two

Chapter Two:

Elenora drummed her pencil against the tabletop. The library was eerily quiet and while she may have been staring down at her textbook, her mind was on other things. Her back hit the wall hard, but she did not mind. The impact actually spurring her on as she worked at pulling Tim’s shirt out from his pants, while his lips attacked the side of her neck. Unconsciously, Elenora’s knees closed tighter together.

Tim’s hands roamed down her sides and cupped her ass and the next thing she knew, her feet were off the air. She felt Tim’s hearty laugh against her skin as she yelped in surprise and quickly wrapped her legs around his waist. Elenora felt the instinctual need to grind herself into Tim, eliciting a moan from him before his lips captured her own.

Pulling his lips away from her, Tim looked Elenora in the eyes with a smile. “I gotta’ confess, I knew who you were...at the bar.“

“Oh, really?”

Tim rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. “Each time you brought Art a coffee or stopped and talked to Rachel I hoped that there would be some excuse to talk to you, but then the rational part of my brain would stop me, telling me that you were Art’s ward and that I could look but not touch.”

“So what changed?”

“Probably the alcohol.” Said Tim as he opened his eyes and gave her a smile. “And the picture. I’m never deleting that, by the way.”

“Nora...”

Elenora dropped her pencil down in shock and shifted in her chair away from the unexpected greeting.

“Geez girl. You don’t look like you got any sleep.”

“No. I was awake most of the night.” Responded Elenora and a flash of Tim above her, lips around her nipple and two of his fingers deep inside her.

“I can’t believe you actually got arrested, can’t say I thought you had it in you, but I’m glad you did. I was routing for you.” Said the girl as she produced a set of keys and placed them on the table next to one of Elenora’s books. “The apartment is all yours.”

Reaching for the keys, Elenora held them in her hand and looked at her friend. “Wait. So no one else finished?”

“Oh no, they did. But they are all still locked up in the drunk tank. I guess there is some investigation into the amount of public intoxications that happened last night. Everyone missed class. The professors are pissed.” Said the girl with a laugh. “That’s the spare, so if you wanna start moving stuff over, you can. I’m basically packed up. My parents took two SUV loads to New York already. I’ll get the landlord to get me the copies of the lease, and I’ll leave them on the counter. If I’m not there, just sign your life away and leave three post dated’s. He’ll want them A.S.A.P. Then it is all yours.”

“Thanks again for this. It’s nice to know I’ll have a place of my own finally.”

The girl gave Elenora a nod and then headed off. Once Elenora was alone, she pulled out her cell phone and opened up her conversation with Tim, which still only comprised of the text to give her a wave and the nude photo her friends had both sent.

Elenora: Please say that you did not have anything to do with the fact there is a bunch of hungover university students locked up in jail right now.

Tim must have had his phone near him, as his response came through almost instantly.

Tim: I thought you wanted the apartment to end all apartments?

Tim: Also, I’m insulted that you would think I would use my powers of authority in such a manner. *gasp*

Elenora: Well, you didn’t seem to have that mentality when you used those handcuffs on me for a second time...

Elenora pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she thought about when she and Tim went for round two once they had finally made it onto the bed. Tim had reached down to his pants, where he had shoved the discarded handcuffs after helping Elenora out of the remaining side. He held them up to her with a grin. “Wanna make it a little more challenging this time?” Elenora said nothing as she stuck her wrists out to Tim. Once he had the cuffs on her, he pushed her up to the headrest on his bed and placed her arms above her head and the cuffs around one of the bed posts.

Tim: It was an unusual intake of public intoxication. I just wanted to ensure that those girls were safe, and that they couldn’t drink their way into a new apartment. It was my civic duty, I assure you.

Elenora: Well, I thank you for your service, Marshal. Think I might owe you something for taking on such a life saving task.

Tim: Now Ma’am, I like my laundry pressed and folded. Eggs over easy and I prefer my steak more on the rare than the medium side.

Elenora: Really now?

Tim: Oh, does this fancy apartment not have in-suit laundry?

Elenora: Is this your way of telling me you want to see me again, Marshal?

Tim: Ma’am, the thought of seeing you again is the only thing getting me through today.

The heat that ran through Elenora and to her core made her squirm. She never figured for her crush on Tim would amount to anything, considering how she had been banned from having a relationship with anyone in law enforcement. With what her father did, he had a strict rule about who she could date. It was for good reason she knew, because there was always that voice in the back of her mind that told her each time her phone rang that this was the call to tell her something bad had happened.

Elenora: I’m sure that could be arranged. However, Art does always seem to be quite interested in my male friends, probably under the behest of my father. So for now, mind if we keep whatever this is out of his radar.

Tim: Probably for the best. Don’t need Art sticking me on transport duty for the rest of my life. I’m already getting the shit end of the stick for being the new guy.

Elenora: Plus, I don’t need my daddy showing up here and shootin’ you.

Tim: Come on, Dad’s love me.

Elenora: Why do I feel like that’s a lie ;)

Tim: Offended!

Elenora: Don’t you have a perp to catch?

Tim: Shouldn’t you be in class?

Elenora: Studying for final on Friday.

Tim: Same, you are really making it hard to study, by the way. This picture of you keeps popping up on my phone. It’s really distracting.

Elenora let out a loud laugh and quickly her hand shot up to cover her mouth as she looked around the library. A few of the other students had turned to look at her.

Elenora: I’m going to go back to studying now.

Tim: I gotta go do something today. If shit doesn’t hit the fan and you aren’t to studied out, there is a bluegrass band plain’ in this bar in Georgetown tonight...

Elenora: You let me know when you are hole free and off the clock, Marshal.

Tim: Will do Ma’am.

The rest of Elenora’s day went by as usual, however she found she was checking her phone a little more than usual and when finally she could not stand the sound of her empty stomach any longer, she packed up her books.

As Elenora stepped out of the old brick walls and into the evening air, the bag slung over her shoulder. She wished she had not left her jacket in the SUV. The air was crisp once the sun went down. Moving around the side of her old Bronco, she opened the back door and tossed her bag in before leaning in to pick up her leather jacket from the floor. When she moved to stand back up, an arm wrapped itself around her shoulder and down across chest. The arm pulled her tight against a chest and the smell of cheap whiskey engulfed her.

“Well, aren’t you just a pretty one?”

Elenora rolled her eyes. “You best be takin’ your hands off me.”

“Now, why would I ever do that?”

The feeling of another hand sliding across her thigh made her skin crawl. “Maybe you didn’t hear me clearly, so I’ll say it nice and slow this time, so I don’t need to repeat myself for a third time. Remove your hands from my person.”

“Are you gonna be all bark and no fight, little lady? Here I was hopin’ for a little more...”

Eleanor’s shoulder dropped, which caused the grip on her to loosen. The fact that he was clearly intoxicated did nothing to help his reflexes as Elenora ducked down, looped her right arm around the arm that had been traveling her leg. Pulling up, she wrapped her arm around his and spun herself out from in front of the man. With little thought and mainly on instinct, Elenora soon had the man’s face pinned again the side of her SUV and his shoulder pulled from the socket as she held his against his own back.

The man let out a scream as the realization and pain set in. “You bitch!”

“Now that is no way to speak to a lady. Ma’am, do you require assistance?”

“No, Marshal, pretty sure I got this piece of shit handled.” Elenora turned her head slightly to see Tim standing a few steps away, hand resting at the ready against his firearm and his chest heaving as if he had been running.

“This woman...” He began and Elenora felt him try to push off from the SUV.

Threading her fingers through the man’s hair, Elenora gripped the locks and pulled back hard, before putting all her weight into bashing the man’s head against the steel of her SUV, effectively knocking him out. When she felt him go limp, she removed her hands and let the man drop to the ground like a sack of potatoes.

Taking a few steps back from her SUV, Elenora looked to Tim, who was now slowly approaching the man. He gave him a push with his boot and put the mystery man on his back.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.” Whispered Elenora, as she wrapped her arms around herself. The adrenalin from the event was already wearing off. “What are you doing here?”

“Thought I would drive by on the off chance you were still here. Was going to phone you when I parked.” Tim pulled out his cell phone and after that, Elenora did not really pay attention. Instead, she moved herself towards the curb that surrounded the parking lot and sat herself down. Resting her elbows on her knees, Elenora picked at the cuffs of her denim shirt.

She noticed her hand began to shake and just stared at the tips of her fingers as she remembered the feeling of the man’s hand on her leg. “Nell?”

Elenora’s eyes focused past her fingers to see Tim crouched down a few feet away from her. “Do you want me to call Art, or your Daddy?”

“What?” Questioned Elenora in a daze.

“Either way, they both find out about what’s happened. I’ll say I was driving by when I saw the altercation and recognized you as being Art’s ward. Best to call now before the Lexington P.D. gets here.”

“Art, call Art.”

Eleanor watched as Tim gave a nod of his head and stood back up. He pushed a few buttons on his phone and held it to his ear. “Yeah hey Art. I stumbled into a bit of a situation. That Marshal’s kid that’s staying with you, she was attacked outside her car near the university. No, no. She’s okay. Definitely in shock, though. Locals are on the way, but you’ll want to come down. Yup, okay.”

Tipping her head down, Elenora rubbed at her eyes with the palms of her hand, and then looked up to where the man was now laying on his stomach, hands cuffed behind him. “I didn’t kill him, did I?”

Tim must have pocketed as both his hands were free when he crouched back down. “No, think the fucker passed out from the pain. Your daddy taught you all sorts of tricks, didn’t he? Remind me not to piss you off.”

A chuckle left Elenora’s lips before she could help it. “Yeah, never had to put anything into action before.” Her words were followed by a gasp as she felt her breath catch in her throat, and could see her vision glass over with unshed tears.

He must have known what was about to happen as he place his hands out in front of him, palms facing her and took a tentative slide forward, as if he was approaching a wild animal. “Nell, I think you might be about to have a panic.”

“Yeah...” Elenora gasped as she struggled to find breath. She was feeling as though she was about to suffocate, like there wasn’t enough oxygen in the air. Her lungs burned. “Think I might be.”

“I can help if you trust me, but I need to touch you. Is that okay?” Tim asked calmly.

Elenora could only nod her head in response as she gasped once again for breath and tears cascaded down her cheeks. She saw the blur of Tim as he moved around her and came to sit behind her. He pushed himself up his chest against her back and reached around her to take her hands in his. “We’re gonna fold your arms over and I’m gonna hug you tight, okay?” Elenora quickly nodded her head and allowed for Tim to cross her arms against herself and then he followed with his own. “Okay now I want you to feel my chest, and I want you to try to breath with me. In...”

Taking a struggled breath, Elenora could feel Tim all around her. He was like a blanket surrounding her. It was different from the other man. This was warm and as she listened to him tell her when to breathe out and in again, she felt as though nothing could hurt her. At some point, she noticed the blur of what must have been Tim’s hand shooing someone away. The moment seeming to break the spell she was under and slowly the world around her came into view. There were multiple red and blue lights and blurred black blobs, standing and moving around.

Slowly, everything started to come into focus more and Elenora could see Art talking to an officer and watching her. Or was he watching Tim? It was hard to really see. He was not entirely crisp and, after giving a light laugh, she felt Tim’s breath on her neck. “You doing okay now?”

“Yeah, I just. I think I might have cried my contacts out of my eyes.” Elenora let out another laugh, and she felt Tim’s arms unwrap from around her.

“Think you're okay to sit by yourself for a moment?”

“Yeah, I’ll be okay.” Tim pulled himself away from her and the frigid chill of the air hit Elenora, making her shiver. She felt something fall on her shoulders before she saw it. Tim had dropped his green bomber jacket across her shoulders and had now crouched down to pull it around her front.

Elenora let her eyes settle on Tim, and a smile rose to her lips. “Thank you Tim. For everything.”

“Any time, Ma’am.” Said Tim and before he rose, he gave her a wink.

She watched as Tim and Art talked, and then Art set off towards her. Once he got to her, he took a seat next to her and Elenora watched as he rubbed the cell phone in his hand. “Tim says he watched you take our guy down yourself. Pretty impressive.”

“Yeah, daddy taught me well.” Elenora whispered, her eyes dropping from Art down to the concrete of the parking lot.

“Speaking of your daddy, you better give him a call. If he doesn’t know already, he will know as soon as this gets processed, and I don’t wanna be on the receiving end of that phone call.” Glancing back at Art, Elenora saw his phone was now extended toward her, so she took it with a shaky hand. “I’ll give you a few minutes, but then they are going to need a statement from you, okay?”

“Okay.”

Looking down at the phone, she flipped it open and found her daddy’s name. Taking a deep breath, she pushed the call button and put the phone up to her ear with one hand while she lid her other into the sleeve of Tim’s jacket. Then she swapped the phone to the other side and did the same with her remaining arm.

“What’s up Art, I’m a little busy right now,” Came the voice of Elenora’s father through the speaker.

“Hey, daddy.” A sniffled left her nose as she tried to compose herself. It always hurt when she had to tell her father something. She always felt like she was disappointing him, even though she knew she really was not.

“Elenora? What’s wrong?”

“I got attacked.” Elenora whispered, and she felt Art’s hand land on her back and rub a comforting circle. “I’m okay. I’m pretty shaken, but I’m okay.”

“Sit down!” Gunfire echoed through the phone.

“Dad!”

“Sorry, give me two seconds Elenora. Didn’t I tell you to stay where you are? This is an important phone call, but trust me I won’t forget about you and we will be right back at it. Now, you sure you’re okay? Is that what you’re saying or the paramedics?”

“I had a bit of a panic attack, but I’m fine. Not even a scrape. I put him down on his ass.”

“That’s my girl. I’m glad you are safe. Can you put Art on the phone for a moment, and then I need to get back to work, okay? If you need anything, you give me a call.”

“Okay, love you.”

“Love you more, sunshine.”

Elenora handed the phone back to Art with a sigh. “He want’s to talk to you.” Once the phone was handed over, she stared back out into the fray of people and watched who she assumed was Tim point out in a few directions. He must have been giving a statement as to what he had witnessed.

“Yeah, one of my Marshal’s happened to be on scene. He saw the whole thing go down. Had a bad panic attack, but he helped bring her back down. Yeah, I’ll tell him. Bye Raylan.” Art hung up the phone and stood himself up, before offering a hand to Elenora. “Come on now, let’s go get this over and done with so I can get you home.”

Elenora gave a grunt as she stood up, her muscles seizing as though she had just come back from a long run. It took her a second to get her legs functioning and when she felt confident in her steps, the two made their way towards Tim and an officer. “I got that apartment, by the way.” Said Elenora, in a poor attempt to think of anything else but what was happening. “Found out this morning.”

“Congratulations. I’ll be sad to see you go. Leslie will be heartbroken. Think she enjoyed having you around, seeing as how all our own are gone.”

“I’ll still be around.”

“I know.” Replied Art. “But just won’t be the same.”

The two came to a stop at the pair, with Elenora in between both Art and Tim and it was then she noticed her bag draped over Tim’s shoulder. He must have pulled in from her vehicle at some point. “I think I got most of what I need from the Marshal here, but if you wouldn’t mind. Telling me what happened before Deputy Gutterson got here.”

“Yes officer. I had just come out of the library and put my bag in the car. I reached for my jacket and as I was coming back up, he grabbed me from behind.” Elenora noticed Tim’s hand raise out of the corner of her eye and then lower back down as if he thought better about whatever it was he was about to do. “He called me a ‘pretty little thing’. Ran his hand on my thigh and when I asked him to remove himself from me, he replied with why would he? After then I asked him again, and he seemed to get irate at the fact I wasn’t putting up a struggle. He reeked of whiskey.”

Elenora watched as the officer scribbled a few things down on a pad he had been holding before looking back up at her, silently telling her to continue. “I was able to slip from his grip and pin him to my SUV, that’s when...” She had been about to say Tim, but caught herself before his name tumbled from her lips. “When the Marshal showed up, he addressed the man, but I felt him push back against me, so I slammed him into the SUV, and I guess I knocked him out. After that, it’s a bit of a blur, till only a few moments ago.”

“That should be good for tonight, ma’am.”

The officer went to walk away just as Art’s phone rang and the older man held up a finger as for the officer to wait a second. Quickly flipping open his phone and putting it to his ear, Art’s lips turned up slightly, as whomever it was on the other line must have given him good news.

“Thanks, that will be it for now. See you in the morning, Rachel.” Hanging up the phone, Art looked to Tim. “Looks like our guy Kurt Mannan has a few outstanding warrants in Kansas. I’m gonna have the Marshal’s service take it from here, officer.”

“Sounds good to me, Marshal. I won’t argue skipping the paperwork.”

“Tim, would you mind taking Elenora home? I’m gonna follow Mr. Mannan to the hospital and have a few words with him before I take him into custody.”

“I got her Sir.” Said Tim with a nod. Placing a hand to the small of Elenora’s back, he walked her away from the police and towards his SUV. He held open the door for her and helped her in. Without a word he shut her in, got in the driver’s side, swung her bag into the backseat and took off. Much like he had the night before, when they were far enough away and Tim was sure there was no way they would cross paths with Art, he pulled over.

“You still doing okay there, Nell?”

“Yeah. Think I’m just tired.” Said Elenora as she pulled at her seat belt so she could turn slightly. She rested her left temple against the headrest as she looked at Tim. Elenora felt like she had been hit by a truck. Her head was beginning to throb and her muscles were tight. Tim, on the other hand, looked relaxed, but there were a million emotions showing in his eyes. “I like that.”

“What?” Tim asked as he reached over to tuck a chunk of her hair behind her ear.

“You callin’ me Nell. I’ve never heard that one before.” She closed her eyes as Tim’s fingers continued to run through her hair. “It’s nice.” It came out more than a whisper to herself than anything, but she was sure Tim heard it.

There was a pause, and Elenora enjoyed the silence until it was eventually broken. “Let’s get you home.”

Her eyes did not open. Elenora had heard Tim, but the feeling of his hand in her hair and the warmth of his hand had entranced her into a coma like state. There was just no will to do anything other than hum to tell him she had heard.

Chapter Three

#Justifed #Tim Gutterson #Tim Gutterson FanFic #Tim Gutterson FanFiction #Tim Gutterson x OC #Tim Gutterson/OC #Raylan Givens #Jacob Pitts

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ruminate88 · 1 year ago

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He Only Hurts Me

When I first broke up with Andrew, I was very confused to what happened. He has no emotions and wasn’t upset but asked me if we could still be friends. It all felt “fake” and just made no sense. I never knew he was a narcissist or had never truly experienced someone who is a manipulator before. I also never knew of trauma bonding! I texted Andrew the very next day after we broke up but I felt I needed serious space from him. I also felt this overwhelming feeling to delete all of his photos off my phone and delete all our text messages but it was painful to do. I cried the whole time and soon as I did it, I regretted it. I missed his photos and wanted them back but it was too late!! I also deleted my instagram because I had posted pictures of him on there and talked about him like crazy. (He never posted a single thing about me on any of his social media accounts) I got a new phone and made a new Instagram that I did not add him as a friend to.

I went no contact for a few weeks but it didn’t last long. I couldn’t understand the way I was feeling and why it was so hard to move on from him. SO, I reached back out to him “as a friend” but I knew I wanted him back. Even knowing he cheated and i’m probably not the only girl in his life. I was just seriously attached to him. I started talking to him again AND before we broke up, I questioned did he even know my real name because of how he only called me “babe” or “beautiful” and seemed to always just flirt a bunch. Never seemed to really have deep conversations with me… Suddenly he’s talking to me as if we had always been “friends” and he tells me he failed his major in pre-med which is what he’s always been afraid of happening and said he switched his major to anthropology which is probably what he was doing all along. (Unless I’m wrong but he lies so much, why wouldn’t he lie about that too?) We also talked about “my future” and he remembered my dream job, what I wanted to do with my life but also is giving me advice like he suddenly cares!! I asked him how he knew what my dream job was and he says, “I remember you talking about it before.” Like… what??!! 🤔 That was super confusing!! Andrew told me he thought I should be a nurse at an old folks home, said he thinks I’m very good with older people. Probably because he knows I took care of my grand mother but it as weird all he “knew about me” when I was concerned did he even know my real name…

So Andrew and I continued to text a lot which made me upset because of how much he ignored me when we were actually “dating.” At one point I remember I was sitting in my bath tub just really feeling bad about myself, I had battled depression for a few years now and I’ve always felt invisible most of my life. Always felt like I exist in other people’s stories but no one knows me. It’s a strange feeling!! Andrew was of course texting me at this time and I proceed to tell him how I’ve battled depressed and feel invisible like no one ever sees me… Andrew now gets super defensive towards this and says, “What?? How did I not know this?? I deserved to know. That’s not something you should have hid from me!!!” Ugh! I tell him it wasn’t a secret but that I was more distracted when we were together basically I was focused more on him than being depressed. Andrew says he can not believe I felt that way, tells me “I’m too beautiful to be depressed” that he’s upset now and doesn’t want me to feel that way. I try to defend myself and explain why I feel the way I do that I’ve always felt invisible.

SUDDENLY Andrew turned the conversation flirty and sexual…. He tells me he thinks I’m so beautiful that he wants me to be so happy AND wants to know what I’m doing. I tell him i’m sitting in my bath tub and now… NOW he hits on me. Says how sexy it is and that he would join me if he could. He turned my sad conversation into a sexual one and I don’t remember how it happened but eventually we cyber-sexted!!!! I was beyond shocked, confused and excited/curious. What did all this mean?? Did Andrew still want me?? Were we getting back together???

I went to bed with so many racing thoughts and just could not believe what happened. Next day I’m on edge just on a high but I know we’re still broken up and I don’t know what’s going to happen. Then as I’m going about my day, Andrew sent me a BIG, LONG, PARAGRAPH of a text message, accusing me of “not respecting our friendship” asked me “Why did you cyber sex with me when you know I’m not your boyfriend anymore??” He never says that much in one text hardly it’s usually shorter responses and it really upset me because I wondered were we getting back together… I defended myself and told him, “It takes two people to flirt and cyber sex. You started it, I was just following your lead!!” I was soooo confused and irritated. Andrew appeared like he actually cared when I told him I battled depression but now he’s blaming me for everything. I did not understand!

Worse, every night for 2 weeks Andrew would find excuses to flirt with me and cyber sex me. Andrew told me I tempted him to be bad with me that he couldn’t “resist me” and said I knew what he liked… YET I knew we were broken up and most likely he’s messing with my head. The whole two weeks I kept forgetting to eat, I was an emotional mess and so confused by Andrew’s behavior. In the 2nd week on a Friday night, we’re in the midst of a heated cyber sex conversation, he’s telling me I know what he wants/likes BUT wasn’t much longer he suddenly says to me, “Okay we need to stop now. We can’t keep doing this to each other. We don’t respect each other or our friendship and we’re broken up and this is only making it harder.” WHAT?! 😆 I wanted to hit my head against a wall!! Just “errrrrrrrrt”(sound of a car hitting the breaks) It was WEIRD and BIZARRE! I tried to understand him but it made no sense. We kept talking and I asked him a few questions. At some point though, he stopped responding and I went to sleep.

Next morning I’m hurt, sad, confused and very very depressed!!! Andrew texted me good morning, said sorry he stopped responding that he went so sleep… (like it mattered at this point) and he’s asking me how I’m doing. I proceeded to tell him I’m VERY depressed and unhappy within myself. Andrew tells me “God doesn’t want you to be that way”… hah. I could’ve smacked him through the text if it was possible! Andrew tried to “talk positive with me” but everything he said just rubbed me wrong and made me more upset. I felt he was just against me, not for me but it was hard to understand who he is and what his real intentions were. Andrew tried to act like he cares that I’m depressed but it just feels like he’s messing with me and it sucks so much.

Okay then the next day after that, I’m out at the restaurant where Andrew works accept he’s away at college. I show him a picture of the rolls and he says, “I love their rolls” and were talking about it accept THEN Andrew says, “I’m studying right now for finals and I really need to focus.” Hahaha 😝 Not that again!! I’m rolling my eyes at his text and say to him, “okay I didn’t mean to bother you, just showing you the rolls.” He tells me it’s ok that I can talk to him he’s just trying to focus so he’s making me feel like he wants me to keep texting him yet he doesn’t at the same time. He knows I’m in serious trauma bond BUT I don’t know it!! I keep texting him but he keeps acting irritated like I’m bothering him and I end up telling him how confused I am about the whole past two weeks of us flirting and cyber sexting when he doesn’t want a relationship with me and basically I’m confused and sad about the whole entire relationship. We’re talking about it and at one point Andrew sends me a horrifying text that says, “Yeah, I pretended all of my feelings to lead you on. I’m sorry.” 😢💔 I couldn’t believe he said that I was so hurt! I told him wow that it sucks and hurts to hear that, why would he do that to me, how did I deserve that, after how good I treated him. We began to argue back and forth in our text and things quickly got heated and eventually went to a very dark place!! Looking back, I believe he wanted me to hurt myself…

I can’t remember everything we said but I remember Andrew saying, “If I’m hurting you, then just stop caring about me!” UGH! I quickly responded with “Why are you hurting me so much??? What did I ever do to deserve this??? “ Andrew apologized and said he didn’t mean it all and told me “I really loved you at the beginning but then I fell out of love and just didn’t know how to tell you” (none of it made sense) eventually I just couldn’t take all the lies and confusion from him anymore. I didn’t know what to believe and I felt like he was being such a jerk!! I found myself crying so hard I couldn’t breathe and everything went dark from there… I felt my life was one, big, nightmare and I didn’t want to live it!! I thought my world was ending because everything I knew with Andrew before was a lie and I felt so stupid!! It was more than I could bare!! I decided I didn’t wanna continue on living and texted Andrew, “I can’t do this anymore with you.. I’m done and I think I should just end my life!!”

Andrew pretended to freak out. He quickly texted me, “No don’t do that!” He started “begging me not to kill myself” and said “you deserve to stay.” He sent me sooo many text and then because I wasn’t responding, he started calling and calling and even sent a FaceTime call out… I ignored everyone of them, just crying my eyes out!!! For some reason though I had an overwhelming urge to record myself having this suicide attack and I sent it to him. I can NOT remember what he said to it if anything I can’t remember when he stopped calling me and I have an excellent memory but I just can’t recall it all but I do remember crying with my blanket over my head in my room wondering how I should end my life…. Even though Andrew “pretended to freak out” I believe he’s into some dark stuff and was motivating me to end my life. I can’t explain it but why did I send him a video of me crying having this suicide attack?? I didn’t say anything in the video, just sat there falling apart. It was most like my final plea to make him care about me… I felt as if he did not care at all but I wanted to believe he would if I just begged him more or did enough for him.

While I was deciding how to end my life, thinking should I hang myself in my closet or should I drown myself in my bathroom sink, Andrew was blowing up my phone but stopped after I sent him that video of me. THEN my phone rang again. It was my mom this time. She asked what I was doing did I wanna come watch our favorite tv show with her… I said yes and when I got downstairs, she realized I had been upset/crying. She asked me what was wrong and I told her the truth that I was depressed!!! (Did not tell her about Andrew and me having a suicide attack) my mom tried to encourage me, she prayed with me and we watched our show!!! Wow… what a crazy and emotional day.

that night I told Andrew I did not kill myself and his response was “Oh thank God! I thought you hurt yourself!!” And acted as if he was all concerned and worried BUT then started texting me “You’re not well. You really need to work on yourself and do better. You shouldn’t be like this.” 😝🤪 I see now all these years later he was probably speaking against me and wishing for me to hurt myself all while pretending to actually care so I would trust him and believes he’s an okay guy. I DID NOT see the real him though yet and believed he was “caring” sorta. I told him I knew I needed to do better and would try but I was still sad over him not loving me the way I thought I loved him. Andrew told me he was glad I was ok, to be careful and that he had to sleep because he had a lot of studying to do for school BUT asked me “Can we start over as friends and try to treat each other better???” …… 🤨 He told me to have a good week that if I needed him, I could talk to him any time and he’s glad I’m still alive. I tell him good night and thank you….. (I was so stupid)

I STILLL could not move on. Weeks later I’m writing Andrew long paragraphs telling him how I feel, how I’m so confused and hurt. How I hate feeling sad over him and just want to make it all “better” Andrew tells me nothing will make it better and we can’t change anything, that he’s sorry I’m so sad and that I need “space” and “time” he tells me he can’t take back everything that’s happened that I’ll eventually get over it all and “illl be fine” Andrew gives me no answers to why I’m so confused and can’t get over him. Just tells me texting him isn’t going to help me. (Even though he originally said if I needed him, he would be there for me.) Andrew and I both “apologized” to each other for all of it that happened BUT it felt fake to me. None of it added up or made sense and I was still struggling.

I could not stay away from him… I ran right back to him again weeks later still begging for answers and I told Andrew “I know you pretended all your feelings but mine were real. I loved you very much.” ANDREW SAYS, “What are you talking about??? My feelings were always real. I loved you the whole time!!!!” AHHHH 😆😆😆 I WANTED TO HIT MY HEAD AGAINST A WALL! I finally started to realize that he lies in the moment. Whatever he thinks I want to hear, is what he says… He will never be honest with me or give me truth because he probably doesn’t even know the truth. He’s so mixed up in his own head, let alone to deal with me begging him to love me back. I tried really really hard to back off and go no contact….

THEN WEEKS LATER HE CALLS ME… My phone randomly says “Audio FaceTime call from Andrew” WHAT!? That was so weird and at first I thought it was FaceTime and I had just gotten a shower and had a hair wrap on my head. I ripped it off real fast and tried to run my fingers through my hair because I hadn’t gotten to brush it yet. I quickly answered my phone but realized it was only face time “audio” which was WEIRD! Who calls from that??? I answered and said “Hello??” NOTHING! I kept saying “hello???” Nothing was happening. I could hear background noise which made me believe he was at work. I asked “Andrew, are you okay? What’s going on???” I thought maybe he butt-dialed me on accident. Finally I heard a click….. he hung up!!!!!! I was like “what in the world??????” Then not even 10 mins or so later Andrew sent me a text message saying, “I’m busy at work right now. What do you want??” 😨🤨 I quickly defended myself saying I wasn’t “bothering him at work” that he called me…. I ACTUALLY QUESTIONED MY REALITY” I called my niece to tell her about it and she said “sounds like he definitely called you on purpose. I don’t think it was an accident!” That was the start of him trying to make me think I’m truly crazy and don’t know what’s going on around me. He had already confused me so much and it was only going to get worse.

I FINALLY realized just how toxic of a person he is even though I didn’t understand why I believed he was toxic, what does toxic truly mean and I still had no idea he was a narcissist or that I was in trauma bond BUT I worked so hard to get away from him. Never blocked his number but stopped texting him and did my best to move on. It was very hard and took all of my strength! I also still had to overcome depression and suicide!

Still it wasn’t quite over with Andrew… I would have to face his games one more time.

#emotional abuse #narcissistic abuse #self healing #unpacking #my story #self awareness #healingjourney #narcissism #online relationships #healing journey #trauma bonding #trauma #overcome suicide #gaslighting #manipulation #scary #sad stories #heartbreak #narcissistic personality disorder

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wonswondrland · 3 years ago

Text

Memories Of Love

Trainee A’s JJ

♡ Summary: on y/n’s 16th birthday jj bought her a polaroid printer. she jumped up and down, giving the boy a suffocating hug to show her gratitude. she quickly got to work, printing out her favorite pictures from her phone and kept her special ones together in a small box with a heart sticker on the lid. she’s not entirely sure why she did this, but it felt right to her.

y/n wasn’t sure what love was as she was still so young. she was sure she would know as soon as she felt true love. and now, after spending so much time with jj, staring at the special polaroids, and cherishing every gift he gave her, she was starting to feel new emotions. she felt fuzzy and warm. she felt dizzy, drunk, euphoric. every time a touch or hug lingered, she thought she’d pass out. every time a quick glance or prolonged stare was caught from his gaze, she was overwhelmed with nervousness. she was almost certain she was in love. she stared at the polaroids in the special box, recalling all her favorite memories they captured…

♡ Genre: fluff, friends to lovers, basically a compilation of oneshots

♡ Warnings: mushy, gut-wrenching cuteness

previous - masterlist - next

“jj~ahhh,” i whined while koala-ing his arm. “hmm?” he hummed, turning his focus to me “can i take pictures of you? you look so cute today!” i looked at him with wide, puppy like eyes. he sighed, giving in. “of course, of course. where? in the studio or?” “in the parking garage! they’ll come out so cool, i promise.” “the parking garage?” “yup! let’s go!” i grabbed his hand and dragged him with me. he laughed at my eagerness to take his pictures. truth be told, his heart was racing at your compliment. but was he going to show it? nah!

“what do you want me to do? like pose-wise?” “hmm.. just do whatever you want and i’ll just take a bunch of pictures.” he laughed a little as i raised my phone to take pictures of him. he normally wasn’t so shy but with you paying such close attention to him he just laughed awkwardly, not knowing what to do. “jj! just pose or something, please?” he laughed and started acting silly. i started to laugh along with him, taking plenty of pictures.

we sat in the studio as he scrolled through the pictures, seeing which ones he liked the best. i laid my head on his shoulder to see the pictures as well. “wow, these aren’t half bad.” “yah!” i shoved his arm as he laughed. “i’m only teasing,” he said while laughing. i pouted and looked back at the phone. he scrolled to another picture. “oh no, deleting thi-” “DONT YOU DARE JUSTIN JAY!” i said grabbing my phone. “HEY NOT FAIR! I HATE IT!” “noooooo,” i whined, “it’s so cute!!” he sighed in defeat. “fine, but don’t go posting it okay?” “okayyyy” i said smiling while looking back at the photo.

♡ Tags

open!

#jj #jj fluff #trainee a #trainee a imagines #trainee a jj #trainee a fluff #trainee a oneshots #jj oneshots #jj imagines #.wonswondrland #.memories of love

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storiesforallfandoms · 4 years ago

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comparisons ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 2195

request?: yes!

“Can I get a Colson Baker one where you’re dating after him and Megan where you get a bunch of hate and they both defend you against the hate please”

description: when her boyfriend’s ex is one of the most beautiful actresses of this generation, she finds herself being constantly compared to her and receiving hateful messages

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing, hate messages, insecurities

masterlist (one, two)

There was some sort of assumption that when you start dating someone, you immediately hate their ex. That could not be further from the truth for me and Colson. In fact, Colson’s ex-girlfriend introduced us shortly after their break up, and had constantly pushed for the two of us to get together.

Megan was basically the backbone in our friendship. She pushed me to pursue my dreams in acting (as well as helped you with that since she was so much more famous than you were when you started), then she pushed me to start auditioning for bigger roles. The moment she introduced me to Colson, I knew exactly what was coming next.

“That’s weird, Meg,” I had told her. “Isn’t there, like, a girl code about dating your best friend’s ex?”

“I’m literally shoving you onto him,” she had responded. “I think you’re fine with the girl code.”

A few months after meeting, I finally caved and asked Colson out on a date. Six months later, I was still thanking Megan for giving me that push.

Shortly after making our relationship public, however, the happiness slowly came to a stop. For me, anyways. Colson, bless his heart, was blissfully ignorant to the comments his fanbase started to send me.

“yikes, he really downgraded huh?”

“how do you go from megan fox to...that?”

“guess mgk couldn’t keep up his streak of hot girlfriends”

Hate comes with fame, I knew that. I had my fair share of hate comments ever since the start. It was easy to ignore them when they were just a handful of hate comments here and there, but this was different. This was a bombardment of hate that was so heavy I could barley go online.

Colson was oblivious for a while, until he found out I had deleted all my social media accounts.

“Did you delete your Instagram babe?” he asked the minute he got home the day I had done it.

“Yeah,” I responded, nonchalantly. “I deleted all my social media.”

“Why?”

I shrugged. “I just thought it’d be better for me mentally. They say being so attached to social media is bad for you or whatever.”

“But you weren’t even addicted to social media. You just liked sharing your memories - our memories.”

I shrugged again and turned back to my cooking. I wasn’t about to tell him his fans drove me off the internet. He loved his fans, I couldn’t fuck that up for him, even if what they were saying hurt me so much.

My back was to him as I cooked, so he couldn’t see my reaction when he asked, “Is it because people were comparing you to Megan?”

I froze completely. I could feel his eyes staring into the back of my head, but I just couldn’t convince myself to turn around to face him. I knew that if I did, I’d crack. I had gone too long pretending everything was okay, keeping this secret from Colson, to finally let it slip now. I just had to throw him off of his thought process.

“Where did you get that idea?” I asked, trying to keep my voice light.

He was next to me suddenly, holding his phone up so I could see it. On the screen was a picture of me at a red carpet just below a headline that read “(Y/F/N) deletes social media accounts amid hateful comments from boyfriend Machine Gun Kelly’s fans”.

I sighed in frustration. Of course the tabloid vultures had already written articles about it. I had only done it a few hours earlier, but they always had to be the first ones to write another story about me.

“I didn’t even know I was getting hate,” I said, trying to keep up the lie even though it was pretty obvious I had been found out. “I just decided to delete my accounts, it must be a coincidence.”

“Really? Because this article says you were receiving so much hate that you couldn’t even go into the comments on your pictures or replies on your tweets without seeing a mass amount of hate from my fans.”

I turned off the stove and turned around suddenly, abandoning my cooking completely as I quickly walked out of the kitchen and towards mine and Colson’s room. I felt a lump forming in my throat, and the last thing I wanted was for Colson to see me cry.

I wasn’t shocked to hear his footsteps coming after me. I forgot how much longer his legs were than mine, so it didn’t take long for him to catch up with me and stop me before I could get too far away. He took hold of my arm and turned me around to look at him. The moment my eyes landed on his face, it felt like someone had finally broke the dam holding back my tears.

Colson pulled me in for a hug and held me tightly as I sobbed into his chest. Every ounce of overwhelming feelings I had been bottling up for months was finally starting to come out, and I realized it was long overdue when I eventually began to grow tired from my crying.

I felt Colson pick me up and bring me to his bed. My eyes were starting to grow heavy despite how much I was fighting against them to stay awake. The minute my head hit the pillow, I was out like a light.

I wasn’t sure how long I was asleep, but it was obvious I had needed that rest, because when I woke up again I felt more well rested than I had in a long time.

I opened my eyes to find myself facing the window, which helped me to pinpoint that it was now nighttime as the sky was pitch black. I rolled over, expecting to find Colson asleep next to me only to find that I was alone in his bed. I was confused at first, forgetting the events that happened mere hours earlier.

I could hear a distant voice talking and was able to identify it as Colson’s. I got up from his bed and made my way towards the stairs, hearing it get louder as I stood at the top.

“I wish she would’ve told me,” he was saying. “I don’t know why she would’ve kept this a secret from me.”

“She didn’t want you upset with your fans,” came another voice. This one was distorted like it was coming from a phone. When she spoke again, I realized it was Megan’s voice. “And she’s stubborn. She was probably determined to deal with this by herself.”

“I just hate that she felt that way,” Colson sighed. “I don’t want her believing anything any of those people said to her, but I saw screenshots and fuck...they really did just bombard her with hate.”

“I know, but none of us could’ve predicted this. Your fans were so cool with us dating, I thought they’d love (Y/N) since we’re so similar.”

I sat down on the top of the stairs and peeked down enough that I could see Colson without him seeing me. He was laid out on the couch in just his sweat pants. In his hand he was holding his phone up, the other was slung over the back of his couch. I could see the guilt on his face, which broke my heart to see. I didn’t want Colson feeling guilty for something that was out of his control.

“You think what I posted will do anything?” he asked Megan.

“I don’t know. It’s hard to tell. When people want to hate, they just want to hate.”

Hearing that Colson had posted something made me curious. I felt around my pants for my phone, but realized I had probably left it in the room or downstairs somewhere. I was in too deep now to give myself away, but I really wanted to know what he had posted about the situation.

“Thanks for talking to me about this, Megan,” he said.

“Of course, Colson. Anytime.”

They said their goodbyes and hung up. Colson tossed his phone onto the coffee table and put his arm under his head. “Are you gonna come down babe?”

I wanted to ask how he knew I was there, but instead I stood from my spot and made my way down the stairs. When I entered the living room, Colson just looked up at me for a moment, almost expectantly. I smiled down at him and laid on top of him with my head on his chest. The arm that was over the back of the couch wrapped around me and he gently kissed the top of my head.

“How much did you hear?” he asked.

“Just the last bit,” I admitted. “Something about a post you made.”

Colson hummed, his chest vibrating underneath my ear as he did. “I wanted to address the issue, and I knew you wouldn’t let me do it if you were awake.”

“I still don’t like that you did it now,” I said, half joking. “Can I see the post?”

He moved his head to look down at me. “How do I know you’re not going to delete the post?”

“You don’t,” I responded. “You’ll just have to trust me.”

He smiled and reached over to grab his phone from the coffee table. He opened it and pulled up a post he had made on Instagram: it was your usual white background with text post you saw celebrities make from time to time.

It read:

“I love my fans so much. You guys are my EST family, and I’m so proud of this family that we have built over the last few years. However, it came to my attention today that some of you have been less than nice to my girlfriend to a point where she felt the need to delete her social media accounts. I will admit, I was oblivious to this at first as I am not one to go onto other people’s social media to read comments and replies, and (Y/N) kept this to herself instead of telling me about it. But now that I do know, I have to say I am beyond pissed. (Y/N) is the most beautiful girl I have ever met, inside and out. She is not Megan, and honestly - with all respect to Megan - I’m glad that she’s not. I love Megan as a friend, but truly that’s all she is to me. (Y/N) is my soulmate, the love of my life. These comparisons and jabs at her because she isn’t my ex are absolutely disgusting, especially coming from people who claim they love me as much as you guys do. Please learn how to treat the people in my life with love and respect, or else take my face out of your profile pictures and my name out of your usernames/bios as you are not a true fan of mine. From the bottom of my heart, fuck you to anyone that made my girlfriend feel like shit.”

I scrolled down to see the comments and saw that the top one was from Megan, and was already liked by Colson.

“(Y/N) is not my competition, nor is she my enemy. She is my friend and she has been since before Colson and I were ever together. The fact that people feel the need to pit two women against one another just because they both dated the same person is absolutely appalling to me. I’d like to emphasis Colson’s statement - fuck you to whoever hurt my friend.”

I handed Colson his phone back, not wanting to read any more. I could feel a lump in my throat again, but this one was from happiness. I felt so lucky to have two amazing people in my corner during a time that was otherwise very trying for me.

“I’m sorry I never told you,” I said as I rested against his chest again.

“You shouldn’t be sorry, (Y/N). I’m sorry this happened to you.”

“You don’t have any reason to be sorry either. You can’t control your fans.”

“Then neither of us will be sorry.”

I chuckled at this. For a moment we were both silent, the only sound being Colson’s heart beating under my ear. It was a soothing sound, and combined with his fingers tracing over my back, I was almost lulled back to sleep.

“I love you,” he mumbled against my hair.

I lifted my head to look at him. “What?”

“I said I love you.”

I was speechless. It was the first time he had seriously said those words and he had managed to shock me into silence with them.

He looked at me, his face slowly becoming concerned with my silence.

“I love you, too,” I finally managed.

A smile broke out across Colson’s face as he wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly to him. For the rest of the night, he would whisper those three words to me randomly, and I would whisper back my response every time.

#machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson baker imagine #colson baker x reader #mgk #est #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

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tofumedic · 3 years ago

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hewo! for the affections number.. 16 is so cute.. would u be able to do headcanons of all the demon bros with it? if not, can u pls do levi then !

The Brothers + Simeon with #16!

16. taking a photo of them smiling or in their element

(lucifer's is here from a previous ask! and bc of that i added simeon only for having some lil funnies i hope you dont mind <3!!!)

Mammon

His collection is the largest, he flaunts it like collectables like cars or like Levi's figures. It is literally one of his biggest flexes and will use them like trading cards never wanting to send them in group chats or privately bc he took those ones get your own human >:(!

He will however hold his phone directly in one of their faces, waving the screen around to show how he has so many good ones.

He uses them for call screens, his lock screen, his home screen, any widget he can other than the Goldie one. He's a menace about it but do not call him out on it he will buy a second phone to use in the public.

Anyways, anyways for actually taking photos..

Mammon always takes too many, as in he will take a bunch within the same timespan because he doesn't trust his hands not to shake, so if he just takes a lot at one time so he can delete the others and save the best ones

But he just ends up keeping all of them, just favoriting the best or separating them into two albums of "valuables" and "treasures" depending on the quality.

Usually they will all have a small blur, him too excited at seeing whatever expression you wear, whether its a smile at seeing him purposely acting dumb or you enjoying a hobby.

He feeds a lot of unfiltered second hand serotonin off of you! Please do not disturb his "I have just had a very bad brotherly bonding experience, I must cope by looking at my photos of my human- No I'm not smiling already shut up"

Leviathan

Levi will use photos of you like wholesome memes so they carry the same energy as the hang in there cat poster, using different heart overlays and nice quotes

His are also a mixture of blurry but also high quality photos, for ones he takes.

This is because seeing you so dedicated or when you smile in his direction, his heart does this weird jumpstart the palpitations making him feel heavy yet light at the same time almost like a peach and its pit.

But he has a preference to use either this small tripod(he has it as a preparation for going to live shows) or a timer so its set away from him as he calls you over, its his own little trap.

His favorite, the majority of his collection, are those! It's photos of you being in frame with him in it as well because there's just something about how all that happiness of yours is completely focused on him, your smile as you walk over towards him sometimes blurry and mistimed so its only you entering the corner of the screen but you can tell how he takes your attention.

When getting in fights about who has the best photos, he will drop ones that are different hugs of him in your arms like he was a newly one plush. Mammon especially gets pissy about these as well as Belphie and Asmo.

If you can't turn your camera on when he calls or if he is locked in a raid that they're losing he would ask you for a selfie also, never requesting anything special other than just yourself but his favorite is when you send just smiles or videos of the which character are you filter :]!

Satan

Satan often tries to hide it, saying he's taking a photo of himself or checking his hair, maybe even going as far as saying the text on his study notes are too small so he has to hold it in front of his face so close.

Think about cowboys, shooting from the waist. That's him when you're too far away, maybe with a brother or during class or eating. He will scribble out his brother or purposely have the other cropped out of the shot.

He does have a lot of you when you're just turning around to face him and then your reaction, he can't resist the temptation of taking your attention when he's bored or waiting for his next book order to come in before he goes back to the cat behavior of only seeking out attention when he deems it necessary and otherwise pleased for a period of time.

He loves the ones where you look at him before he's ready, these are just slightly shaky from him jumping or pressing the button in an embarrassed panic at your smug yet happy expression.

Has definitely done the cut a hole in a newspaper and put his camera to it to look out like it was some camouflage but he's first, smiling much too hard and trying not to laugh at it, and second had seen it in multiple old movies and shows you had watched together.

Satan, speaking of movies, quite enjoys you in low light. On movie nights where your face is only illuminated by the projector screen and the photos turn out a bit grainy, there's something so romantic about you just existing in such an atmosphere. These ones he does like more when you're focused, looking far off with a small pleasant smile on your face at the soft plot of tonight's pick.

Asmodeus

Asmo will send you them all the time, he's like your own personal Devilgram manager he will even edit them for you and send the before and after of those photos too (MC: when did u take these??? Asmo: ,';p)

He will always have such good angles of you, from your side, from above or below, a 3/4, or full portrait, your silhouette. He may have one for each basic one at least though his favorites are above and below, these are the most personal feeling to him.

Usually these come as him trying to get your attention, bothering you with his phone and purposely leaving the little shutter noise on so you hear every single one while you're just trying to watch a DevilTube video or do something else.

Him snuggled into your side post cuddle just to lean up, phone in his hand and a menacing giggle, it's the first thing you see waking from your drowsy state is him on top of you trying to get cute pictures that he can use as teases as if something else was in progress.

Or ones where you roll on top of him, just trying to get up to see the dumb little flash as an alarm instead of his cute good morning kisses to your face(those are actually used to buy more time with you because he is allowed to be a little selfish as a treat)

He also has them set as his lockscreen and homescreen, these being photos of you together so he can have the best of both worlds, himself and your happy smiling face. He just finds it so cute, whenever you want an audience to see it he's in the first row.

Sends them to the group chat with his brothers to start some chaos

"My~ Isn't my dearest MC just the cutest?" Asmo has sent 28 attachments.

Beelzebub

His collection isn't one of the best out there but it is unique and keeps him content and happy, pleased.

He likes having photos of you for when you two are separated, it makes you feel closer to him and him to you

His may have some of the least blur, hands steady you work on something separately yet aware of the soft stare that was bearing into the side of your head.

He may forget sometimes about the sound so when you get the rare notification from his electronic betrayer it is free power to tease him, asking him if he wanted your attention or if he just took a photo of you and to be honest, then his photos if you let him continue for that setting are a little blurrier on your fine details. He's embarrassed.

He likes these more than ones with just your smile because then he isn't as satisficed because then he's thinking about how nice it looks in person and your laugh and when you let out a sigh being tired from your work, it'll be a cycle until he gives up and goes to see you in person.

But he likes the ones of you in your element very much and photos of you in general, saying that looking at them makes him feel "full"

He means to say complete, he's content and pleased and delighted and he has a reminder of you existing, that you're real and not a midnight sleep walk hallucination.

Belphegor

He has the smallest collection but next to rest, Beel, and his appearance he is mostly focused on capturing photos of you when he can.

He didn't get to really know you as long as his brothers have so its only fair he gets to spend more time with you than them until he's equal, and then some because you're really comfy and you make his twin happy? and then on top of that you make this face when you are concentrated and you smile different depending on if you're gonna laugh or if you're confident.

There's so much he has to memorize, he's rather demanding with having the attention so he may continue this personal agenda of his.

A lot of them are from similar angles, from laying with him in different positions but everything feeling relatively the same, normal. These are usually after he has woken up, not before he goes to bed so either it's your soft good morning smile, or your surprised "how long have you been awake" face, or you still asleep on your own.

Many of them often have his bed head just barely visible at the bottom, usually having laid on top of you and just using his selfie camera and angling it up to see you take up more of the screen.

For just being a pillow that moves a lot you definitely are photogenic.

He doesn't send his photos of you to chats but will save photos sent of you from everyone except Lucifer.

Simeon

PLEASE applaud.

It takes him such a long time, but Solomon gave him the idea saying it was something sweet you would also enjoy the concept of. So he is doing his best.

He will see you, just existing and his heart will swell, needing to pause a moment before kindly asking you to hold that thought and pose as he turns on his phone, maneuvering to the camera and trying to get it to focus on you perfectly.

It takes him a few minutes every time but he is getting better at it but his reaction is always the same, smiling at you showing up on his phone screen waiting for the picture to be taken.

He never can be sneaky about it unless he asks for help to get your photo, sending Luke on his biggest mission yet, a photo after he asks you what you thought of Simeon's cooking knowing you'll have that sweet face of genuine thought looking back on it.

But he has yet figured out how to turn the sound off and almost always accidentality flashes you up close, it's so bright.

He has the most blurry photos, and that's not on purpose but when he asks you to look at them with him so he can coo about how happy you look or how serious, its endearing with the blur especially as they clear up a bit continuing the timeline of photos.

He really does his best to have these mementos of you.

Is delighted when you surprise him by putting his favorite one of you as his home screen, he's so grateful let him match with you he wants to be yours too!

from this prompt list!

144 notes · View notes

calwrites · 3 years ago

Text

Fearless

Prequel to Don’t You

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x reader

Word count: 4.5k

————————

“Looks like it finally stopped raining.”

The murmur of the coffee shop was replaced by the sounds of the city as you followed Sebastian outside. The humidity seemed to hit you like a truck, making you miss the air conditioning you had just left.

“Finally. I thought I was going to be stuck in that coffee shop with you forever.” You laughed at the faux offended look on Sebastian’s face. “That’s what I get for not checking the weather.”

“Next time I’ll let you wait out the rain by yourself,” Sebastian threatened. His grin made the corners of his eyes crinkle a bit. Had they always done that? Had you just never noticed before?

“At least then I won’t have a bunch of teenage girls taking pictures of me the whole time. They’re scary. How do you deal with that all the time?” It had been disconcerting to have the group of girls staring at you and Sebastian as you sat and chatted. For a moment, you had thought you were crazy when you noticed them looking. The first thought you had was that you had something on your face or needed to fix your hair, but you realized why they were so focused on your table when they walked over to ask Sebastian for pictures.

Sebastian let out a sigh as he shrugged. For a second you were worried that you had said something wrong. “I just try to ignore it most of the time. I’m polite if they come up to me. I’d rather they like me than hate me.”

“I’m sure you have lots of stories. You’ll have to tell me sometime.” Your eyes widened when you realized what you’d said. What if he didn’t want to see you again? “I mean, if you’re staying in the city long. I’m sure you’re really busy.”

“I’ve got some promo to do soon, but I’m not filming again for a few months. I wanted a bit of the break.” Sebastian waved his hand. “Let’s not talk about my work. What about you? You taking the business world by storm?”

“Well I did just get a raise, so now I can almost afford my rent, groceries, and student loans.” The joys of living in New York City.

“Ah sounds like everything’s going well then. Are your parents still around?” Your parents had basically fallen in love with Sebastian when they first met him freshman year. A group of your friends had come over to your house for a movie night and Sebastian had insisted on staying to help you clean up after everyone else had left. Your mom had spent the next few weeks not so subtly dropping hints that she thought you should date him.

“Yeah they’re still in Jersey. They tried to convince me to move in with them, but I told them I didn’t want to have to commute into the city every day. Of course, that set them off about how that’s what they’ve been doing my whole life because they didn’t want me growing up without a yard or whatever.”

“So it sounds like they haven’t changed much?” You shook your head slightly to force yourself to stop watching Sebastian as he laughed.

“No they have not.” You bumped your shoulder against Sebastian’s gently. “They’re your number one fans, you know.”

“Oh they are?” His eyebrows raised in surprise, and he was already fighting a smile, no doubt waiting to hear what embarrassing things your parents had done since high school graduation.

“They see all of your movies in theaters.” Multiple times, but you didn’t want Sebastian to think they were weirdos.

“Even the bad ones?”

“Even the bad ones. I did tell them that they aren’t allowed to buy any of the Bucky dolls.”

“They’re action figures.”

You rolled your eyes, but found yourself matching Sebastian’s smile anyway. “Whatever. It’d be weird seeing a mini version of you at my parents’ house. It’s bad enough that they still have a bunch of high school pictures hung up.”

“My mom does too. She’s going to be so excited when I tell her that I ran into you. You were always her favorite of our group.”

You stopped suddenly, grabbing Sebastian’s arm. He looked a little alarmed, but you ignored it. “Are you serious? I was always so scared of her. This is the best day of my life.” You had met Sebastian’s mom a couple of times throughout high school, but had never been able to tell whether or not she liked you.

“Scared of her? Why? Because of the accent?”

“The accent didn’t help, but really it was because she’s hot. That makes her intimidating.”

Sebastian groaned and pulled a face. “No. You can’t think my mom is hot. That’s not allowed. Take it back or I’m sending your parents all of the Bucky dolls I can find.”

“It’s not like I wanted to bang her or anything. I just think that she’s an attractive woman. Which makes sense considering how attractive you are.” Your mouth snapped shut. You weren’t sure who was blushing more, you or Sebastian. “Let’s forget about this whole conversation.” Sebastian laughed slightly and nodded.

It was silent between you two as you continued your walk through the streets. You weren’t really sure where he was going. You were heading to your car, but you couldn’t tell if Sebastian was also going somewhere or if he was just following you. If you had looked up, you would have noticed that Sebastian was watching you carefully. But you didn’t look up. Your eyes were on the pavement, watching the glow of the lights in the reflection from the rain.

“Do you remember that poster that was in our English class freshman year?” you asked suddenly. Sebastian’s brow crinkled slightly as he tried to remember, but then he followed your gaze to the glowing pavement and smiled.

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” The two of you laughed slightly as you remembered your slightly eccentric teacher. “We made fun of that poster so much.”

“It was a stupid poster. But remember it was raining when we were leaving the homecoming dance freshman year and we started dancing in the parking lot-”

“And all of our friends thought we were crazy,” Sebastian finished. “To be fair, we were crazy. That was probably the most fun part of the dance though.”

“Are you saying that I was a bad date?” You gasped and brought your hand up to your mouth as if Sebastian had offended you. Both of you dissolved into giggles.

“I’m saying that I was probably a bad date. I was so awkward. I had such a big crush on you.” Sebastian rubbed his neck uncomfortably. You definitely didn’t notice how the action made his arms look.

“Wait really?” This was news to you. You had always kind of assumed that Sebastian didn’t like you very much. He had always seemed to just tolerate your presence.

“Oh yeah. All the guys used to make fun of me because I got so awkward around you. That’s why I never talked when you were with us.”

“I just thought you were shy or something.” Or that he secretly hated you.

“Well that too,” Sebastian admitted with a small grin.

“You should have just told me. I had a crush on you too. I was so excited when you asked me to the dance.” You were so engrossed in conversation that you almost walked right past your car. “Oh, this is me.”

“Oh.” Was it your imagination or did Sebastian look disappointed? Before you could figure it out, he was smiling again. “It’s been nice catching up. We should hang out again. You still have the same number?”

You assured Sebastian that you did and the two of you exchanged more pleasantries. After sliding into your car, you watched Sebastian continue down the street. The memory of the two of you dancing wildly in the parking lot while the rest of your friends complained about the rain made you smile. You kind of wished you had asked him to dance again.

————————

Part of you already wished that this weekend would never end, even though it had barely even begun. You had finally made it out of the city and still had a couple hours of driving left, but you were already dreading having to go back into the office on Monday.

You and Sebastian had been hanging out more since running into each other last month. Most of the time, you got away without any pictures of the two of you getting out, but recently that had been getting harder and harder to do. Now, through what you could only assume was some sort of social media stalking witchcraft, people had managed to figure out who you were. The hundreds of notifications had freaked you out at first, but after deleting all of the social media apps from your phone, it was totally not a big deal.

Until your coworkers had found out. Some magazine had printed a picture of you and Sebastian, including your name underneath it, so now everyone at the office was either making fun of you by pretending to take paparazzi pictures whenever you walked into a room or constantly asking about Sebastian. Needless to say, you desperately needed this weekend away.

“Hungry eyes,” Sebastian sang, rather poorly though you suspected that was on purpose. You had seen him in musicals in high school. He half turned towards you, reaching out with one hand while the other stayed on the wheel, as he continued to sing along to the music. “One look at you and I can’t disguise these-”

“Keep your eyes on the road,” you scolded, though you couldn’t help but laugh at his bad attempt to hit a high note. “You know, I was worried that you would get us killed at the cabin, but now I know you’re going to get us killed before we even make it there. And stop caressing my hair.” You slapped his hand away for emphasis.

He reached out again to run a hand down your hair. “I am not caressing your hair-”

“Definitely were.”

“-and I am not going to get us killed. We are going to have a nice relaxing weekend at a cabin that I rented and am graciously letting you stay at without paying me back. And we aren’t going to worry about paparazzi or annoying coworkers or random people on the street with cell phones.” There may have been a incident earlier that week where you had almost gone up to a random person in the street to yell at them about taking pictures of you and Sebastian. It turned out they were just a lost tourist who barely spoke English. That was when Sebastian decided that you needed a vacation too.

“I think I’m paying you back by forcing myself to spend time with you. You’re very hard to get along with. Plus, I have no money for vacations. We can’t all be actors in Marvel movies.” The trees blurred by as Sebastian drove down the highway.

“You know, I could probably get you in the next Captain America movie. You might not have any lines, but you could stand in the background.” Had he ever offered any of your other friends from high school roles in his movies? No, you couldn't let yourself get caught up in these kinds of questions.

“Sebastian, thanks again-”

“Stop! I told you to stop thanking me-”

“Thanks again,” you continued loudly, “for inviting me. I know that you were looking forward to a relaxing weekend away before you have press stuff. If you want, we don’t have to talk to each other. I don’t want to ruin your relaxation.”

Sebastian shifted uncomfortably in his seat at your thanks, but then shot you an incredulous look. “How would you ruin my relaxation? I wouldn’t have invited you if I didn’t want to spend time with you.”

“Promise?”

Sebastian sent you a smile that was so full of warmth that you could have melted right there. You were definitely getting caught up now. You tried to snap yourself out of it by thinking about all of the reasons you could never date Sebastian. First, he was Sebastian. He knew what you looked like when you were young and awkward. He had seen the awful bangs you cut yourself sophomore year. Second, he was Sebastian Stan. Surely he’d never date a nobody like you. Not that he was stuck up now. He was surprisingly similar to how he had been in high school. It’s just, he could date models if he wanted to. You were definitely not a model. And you wouldn’t even want to date someone in the spotlight like him. Third, you had been on like two dates with the skeazy guy from accounting. If you ignored most of what he said, he was only a little skeazy. Barely tolerable really. You could work with that.

But then Sebastian ran his hand through his hair, and you had to bite your lip to stop yourself from saying anything stupid. Did he know what he was doing or was he just naturally this cool now? Either way, it was going to be a long weekend.

————————

The dance was not fun. Whoever was writing the prom scenes in all of those cheesy movies was full of crap. The decorations looked bad, your dress was uncomfortable, and you were so busy making sure everything was running smoothly that you weren’t even getting to enjoy your senior prom. You never should have agreed to head the prom committee. Surely the night would be more fun if you didn’t have any responsibilities.

Except you’d probably still be standing on the edges of the dancing watching as all of your friends danced with their boyfriends. You had thought that this would finally be the dance you had a boyfriend for, but then your boyfriend broke up with you less than two weeks before because you were spending too much time working on prom. Great. Wonderful.

It had been difficult to mentally prepare yourself to go to senior prom without a date after working so hard on it. It had seemed almost poetic when Sebastian asked you. The two of you had gone to your first high school dance together and now you were at your last high school dance together.

Except Sebastian had barely talked to you all night. In fact, he had barely even looked at you. At least, that’s what you thought. Sebastian later confessed to you that he was scared he’d get in the way of your prom committee duties so he watched you from afar as you took care of the last minute issues. But you didn’t know that yet.

“Decided to actually acknowledge me?” you snapped when Sebastian leaned against the wall beside you.

Sebastian rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. He was probably already regretting coming over to talk to you. “I probably deserve that. You just seemed busy.”

“There were a couple of issues that I had to take care of. I still want to enjoy the dance though.”

“So let’s enjoy it.” Sebastian held his hand out to you and nodded to the dance floor. You smiled gratefully at him and took his hand, letting him lead you out.

Neither of you were great dancers, and the dance floor was maybe a little too crowded, but you made the best of it. After bumping into another couple one too many times, you and Sebastian retired back to the wall, perfectly content to watch the others and whisper amongst yourselves.

“So have you had fun tonight?” Sebastian asked. You had, which was surprising considering how badly the night had started out. Sometimes you forgot how well you and Sebastian could get on. It was so rare to talk to him one on one. You really didn’t know how prom could have gone better. You were kind of disappointed that prom was wrapping up. Already, the dance floor had begun emptying as people left for various after parties.

“I did.” Sebastian grinned, obviously pleased with your answer. “But it wasn’t nearly as good as homecoming freshman year.”

Sebastian's smile faded as he tried to recall the dance you were talking about. “Wasn’t that dance really awkward though?”

“Sure the actual dance was,” you shrugged. “But dancing in the parking lot after was one of my favorite high school memories.”

Sebastian threw his head back to laugh, his hand resting on your shoulder to steady himself. “I’ll admit that I’m kind of glad it’s not raining tonight. My mom was not happy that I got my suit wet. But we can still dance like that tonight. There’s plenty of room on the dance floor.”

“Absolutely not,” you scoffed. “We’d look crazy.”

“Everyone here is either our friend or someone who we’ll probably never see again.” Sebastian held his hand out to you. You bit your lip as you considered before meeting his eyes. He raised an eyebrow in challenge.

“Fine.” Sebastian laughed as you took his hand, once again allowing him to drag you onto the dance floor. He was truly fearless in his dancing this time. Obviously you had to follow suit and ignore the looks people were throwing you as you and Sebastian twirled and spun and jumped around. By the time it was time to leave the dance, you both were red faced and breathless with laughter. The sky was perfectly clear as you walked through the parking lot, but part of you wished it was raining so you could once again dance in a storm in your best dress with Sebastian.

————————

“I thought you weren’t talking to me because you didn’t really want to go with me.”

“What?” Sebastian took his eyes off the road quickly to look over at you. “Why would I ask you if I didn’t want to go with you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe our friends told you to since neither of us had dates.”

“You’re crazy. I was so intimidated by you that I didn’t want to get in your way.” You scoffed and started to speak but Sebastian shushed you. “You’ve always been the most impressive person in the room.”

You weren’t entirely sure how to respond to that. Sebastian Stan thought that you were impressive. But what exactly did that mean? That he thought it was neat that you managed to wrangle high school students enough to plan prom? He said ‘you’ve always’ which seemed to imply that he still felt that way. Right? But he was a successful actor. He worked with people way more impressive than you every day.

The thoughts flashed furiously through your head as Sebastian continued to drive slowly through the town. He had certainly achieved his goal to get away from the city. It was hard to believe the small town you’d spent the weekend in was so in the same state as the city. Paparazzi had certainly not been a worry for the two of you. Eventually, the car reached the end of the road. Rather than turning around and heading back into town, Sebastian put the car in park.

“I don’t want to go back,” he sighed. You had to agree with him. You wanted to stay right there. It had been so relaxing to get away from it all. No paparazzi. No fans. No coworkers. Just you and Sebastian. But it couldn’t last. You had work, and Sebastian had interviews.

“So let’s stay here,” you suggested. “We’ll stock up on food and then barricade ourselves in the cabin. We’ll obviously have to defend ourselves when Marvel comes looking for you and my company comes looking for me, but I have complete confidence that we can take them.” Not that you had reached a position in the company where they would notice you were missing. Maybe after a week or two they’d notice something was off. Marvel was sure to be quicker though.

“Ha ha you’ve made your point.” He sighed again. “This has been the best weekend I’ve had in a long time. Thanks for coming with me.”

“Thanks for inviting me.” Your voice sounded small in the sudden stillness of the car. Sebastian’s eyes flickered over your face, going from your eyes to your lips. “What did you mean earlier?”

“About what?”

“When you said that I was always the most impressive person in the room.” You were a little nervous about his answer. There was a good chance you’d made it out to be deeper than he meant. But then you remembered how fearless and free you felt when Sebastian led you out onto the dance floor at prom, and you knew you had to know the answer.

“Exactly that. I’m constantly in awe of you. The way you were the smartest person at school. I mean, I think you’re still the smartest person I know. I don’t understand anything you’re saying when you talk about work. You always knew exactly what to say to diffuse any of our friends’ drama. You’re kind and funny and always keep me on my toes.” Sebastian paused for a moment. You tried to speak, but all you could do was look at his beautiful blue eyes. “Running into you might be the best thing to ever happen to me.”

“Sebastian,” you murmured. Before you could think of anything else to say, Sebastian’s lips were on yours. You smiled into the kiss as you ran your fingers through Sebastian’s hair. It was the perfect length. You tried your best to capture the memory of this moment. The feel of his lips. His hand on your cheek. The faint sound of birds chirping outside. The patter of rain on the car roof. It was all perfect, and you wanted to remember every second of it.

————————

You didn’t know how life could get better than this. Sebastian’s hand was entwined with your own as you walked through the streets. You had been nervous about this at first. What would his fans think? So far they had been curious but benign when it came to you. Hopefully that wouldn’t change now.

You had almost cancelled when Sebastian showed up at your door. A night in suddenly sounded really good. He hadn’t let you though. Instead, Sebastian had grabbed your hand and pulled you out onto the street. You laughed as he twirled you, causing the skirt of your favorite dress to flow out.

“Good thing it’s not raining today,” Sebastian had laughed. “This would be much less enjoyable if we were getting rained on.”

“I don’t know about that. I think we normally have a pretty good time in the rain.”

You had managed to walk to the restaurant without being spotted, though you had noticed some people taking pictures as you were eating. By the time the bill had been paid, you were more than happy to take Sebastian’s hand and follow him outside. A short walk later and the two of you were strolling around a park eating ice cream on the way back to your apartment.

“So did you have fun tonight?” Sebastian asked.

“I did,” you admitted with a smile. “It was a lot better than I was expecting.”

“Ouch.” Sebastian made a faux wounded expression that ended up making you both laugh. “I didn’t realize you thought I’d be a bad date.”

“It wasn’t you I was worried about. Your fans kind of terrify me. Not gonna lie. I half expected them to show up at the restaurant and start pelting me with rotten fruit or something.”

“That would certainly kill the mood, but I don’t think you have to worry about people throwing fruit at you.”

“No. I just have to worry about what people are going to be saying about me online.”

“Hey, stop.” Sebastian caught your hand and pulled you back to where he had stopped walking. His hands cupped both sides of your face as he looked seriously at you. “It’s going to be ok. Yeah, there are going to be some people who say some mean things. Just ignore it. It’s why I don’t bother with social media much. It doesn’t matter what they say.”

“Easy for you to say. You’re not the one they’re going to accuse of dating someone just to latch onto their fame or money.” Soon after you and Sebastian had started hanging out, the posts about you trying to use Sebastian’s game to get ahead had started. It didn’t really make much sense. Being friends with an actor wasn’t going to get you promoted any sooner. Still, they had annoyed you and sometimes made you feel weird about being around Sebastian.

“I know that you’re not using me. You know that you’re not using me. Everyone that matters will know that you’re not using me. If anything, I’m getting the better end of our relationship. I’m getting to date the most amazing woman ever.”

“Most amazing woman ever?” you repeated. “I’m not sure I have the necessary qualifications for that title.”

“Would you like to hear your qualifications?”

“Yes I would.” You giggled slightly, feeling like a kid with a crush, when Sebastian slung his arm around you and pulled you close so that he could whisper in your ear.

“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You are the smartest person I know. You’re kind and funny and you know all of this already because I’ve told you it before.”

“Yeah but I wanted to hear it again.” Your face was so close to Sebastian’s as you whispered back to him that your noses were almost touching. You hardly dared to breathe as your eyes flickered between his eyes and his lips.

Sebastian just barely started moving closer when you both heard “Is that Sebastian Stan?” coming from a nearby group of people. You jumped back almost immediately, blushing like a kid who was caught holding hands on the playground. Sebastian sent you a small smile before turning to face the fans who had come up to ask for pictures. Once he was finally finished with that, he took your hand again and led you back towards your apartment. Hopefully, no one had gotten a picture of you two in the park about to kiss. Despite what Sebastian had said, you were still scared of what people would say. Your hands shook slightly as you walked, so you slipped your hand out of his, hoping he hadn’t noticed.

Quicker than you would have liked, you were back outside your apartment building. “Do you want to come up?” you asked when he stopped on the sidewalk.

Sebastian shook his head. “I have to be up early tomorrow, and, if I go up, I’m never gonna want to leave.” Sebastian grabbed your hands, which were still shaking, and pulled you close before resting his hands on your hips. “I had a great time tonight.” He smiled, making you feel a bit more brave. This was just Sebastian. The same Sebastian you had known for years growing up.

Slowly, Sebastian brought a hand up to your face, giving you plenty of time to stop him. But you didn’t want to. He was making you feel a bit fearless. You grinned as he kissed you softly. Even though it wasn’t your first kiss, it certainly felt like it. Although technically, it was your first kiss as an official couple. And it was your first kiss out in public, where someone could take a picture that would make its way through the Marvel fandom.

But that didn’t matter to you now. The kiss was flawless. And despite whatever people online were probably already posting about you, you would never regret this moment. Life with Sebastian was undeniably better than life without him.

————————

tags

@bbl32

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x yn #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan oneshot #calwrites

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kbsd · 4 years ago

Note

not sure if you’ve answered this before, but what’s your process look like when you make an amv? i’m just curious and in constant awe of ppl who can make videos like you do :)

hello all!!! i have answered this before and i have a vid help tag with other asks i’ve gotten about stuff like this! but i’ve gotten several more messages along these lines so i’m just going to answer a bunch of them together (under a cut since i love to ramble about editing lol). i do just wanna say i’m definitely not the authority on video editing and obv everyone has their own techniques!

edit: i just finished typing all this up and it’s SO long so sorry in advance LMAO god bless anyone who reads this entire thing

so i work in news tv and we have a very specific workflow for writing scripts, sourcing video, producing, and editing. i’ve just applied that to making amvs! for every video i make, i copy the song lyrics into a google doc and adjust them to match the song i’ve cut (i often will trim songs for time and/or content purposes). then i start planning! i’ll mark down what clip i want to use for each lyric next to that line, and any sound bites i want to use (with episode numbers!). i’ll color code between video and sound bites and lyrics, so my scripts end up looking something like this (for my honeybee amv):

doing the planning ahead of time makes everything much easier when it’s a video that spans the whole show or involves a lot of sourcing, like honeybee or sports analogies. that way when i get to the actual editing process, i already know what i’m going to do and have a game plan. for videos like happy ending or believe it or not, where i’m mainly just pulling from a few episodes, i can just plan it in my head as opposed to writing it all down, and produce as i edit. obviously i do make in-the-moment decisions while editing—sometimes a shot doesn’t work the way i thought it would, or i go where the video takes me—but planning ahead definitely helps. i know some people use spreadsheets as well, with columns for lyrics, video clips, and sound bites if applicable. once you find a system that works, it actually goes pretty quickly.

as for sourcing clips themselves/finding clips within episodes, i talked about that here and kind of here. the short version is that transcripts are a must, and the supernatural wiki is hugely helpful by cataloguing all the hugs, prayers, phone calls, etc. in the show. gifmakers that tag episode numbers on their posts are your friends. it gets easier the more video you make—that’s another huge reason i make the google docs for each video (even the ones i plan in my head, i end up going back and making a loose script with episode notes just for reference). if i can’t remember where something is but i know i used it in another video, i can easily reference past scripts!

i also cut all my videos in the same project in premiere pro, so i can flip between them easily. instead of checking a past script, i can just go to the video sequence itself and copy the clip i’m looking for! this was especially helpful when i match cut together the 5x18 and 4x22 wall slam shots for my bestie video, and then stole it from myself for honeybee hahaha. at any given time i have at least 8 sequences open:

because of the sheer volume of videos i make, it’s worth it for me to download the entire show—i have all 327 episodes in HD, plus deleted scenes. if you think you’re only going to make a few videos, i’d start with scene packs. you can usually just google “destiel [or whatever ship/character you’re looking for] scene packs” and there will be any number of ones you can download. if you need other specific scenes, you can always download/torrent individual episodes or screen record netflix (that’s what i did before i got HD download links). i’m happy to share my links if you DM, but be warned it’s a lot of disk space (about 500GB on my hard drive). someone also compiled every destiel scene, downloadable here.

having every episode already loaded in premiere for all my projects also makes it a lot easier to source clips. once i use a clip in a video, i’ll put a marker on the episode file, so that after a while i have most of the important scenes/lines marked to easily find them. to give you an idea, this is my episode file in premiere for 12x10 lily sunder has some regrets (markers at destiel scenes, the car fight, hot girl cas, etc.). markers are the green tabs along the bottom:

premiere also lets you color code and name markers, so ONE DAY i will go back and color code them all. the ones above are all the same color, but in a perfect world, i’d have a myraid—for destiel shots like hugs, touches, looks; for important pieces of dialogue; for action shots; etc. but for now this works ok for me, so that’s a project for another time!

between detailed scripts, one giant premiere project, markers, the wiki, and my own memory, i have so many points of reference that i can usually find any clip i need in about 2 minutes max. sound bites are often harder to start out, or tiny specific shots i haven’t used before, and that’s when i turn to tumblr gifsets or beloved mutuals to crowdsource. but if you’re as obsessive about marking/keeping neat scripts as i am, it gets easier and easier with every video you make. that’s part of why i’m able to cut videos together so quickly. (also i want to stress i do this for a living and have to produce/edit a new piece for my show every day so i’m used to it. and compared to constantly updating content/sources and news that changes every day, 327 highly documented episodes that never change are much easier to handle hahaha)

this is all great for me since i make so many videos and plan to continue doing so, but if you’re only making a few, this level of work isn’t worth it imo. really it’s all about developing a system that works for you. whatever you do with episodes/sourcing, though, i cannot recommend planning things out in a script ahead of time enough.

everything i just mentioned is producing, though. for the editing process, i usually do it in this order:

music first. any parts i want to cut, i make sure it all sounds smooth

then soundbites. i usually try to weave them into the lyrics—i have characters talk in breaks between lines or instrumental sections as much as possible. i’ll sometimes go so far as looped/extending an intsrumental part to make room for the soundbite i want there lol. if i do have dialogue over a line, i do the sound mixing/levels at this point as well to make sure everything is audible/one doesn’t overpower the other. (also i always include the video that goes with these bites when i drop them in, and decide later if i want to show the character speaking or have other clips cover the dialogue)

once i have all the audio locked in, then i bring in all my other video clips. sometimes i edit completely chronologically, sometimes jumping from section to section—it depends on the song or how i’m feeling

double check sound mixing. i usually listen to my videos through a few times, with headphones and without to make sure it’ll sound good no matter how people watch it

once i have picture and audio lock, i go through and color correct my clips. i’m basic and just use lumetri color in premiere, and usually just play with brightness, saturation, temperature, and tint until i like it

render and export! :)

i always have several audio tracks, but i try to keep my video tracks condensed. i’ll drop clips on a V2 level, and edit a section there, and drop the whole chunk down to V1 so i know it’s finished. that way when i leave and come back i can know where i left off/what’s done/etc. to give you an idea, this is the timeline for my what the hell video:

i always render as H.264 with high bitrate, and make sure to check “render at maximum depth” and “use maximum render quality” for the best quality. i’m sorry, but i don’t know what the equivalent options are in final cut, imovie, kdenlive, etc. i post on youtube mostly so i don’t have to sacrifice quality, but usually just using a lower bitrate will get you under the tumblr file size limit and it’ll still look good.

as for the anon who asked about “polishing”: first of all, thank you!! second of all, it’s in the details. all of this is a matter of taste and my own insanity, but here are some little things i always try to do:

after i color correct, i blur out any credits from the starts of episodes. i use gaussian blur for this, but really any blur tool works

as much as possible, i avoid clips where we see a character’s mouth move but don’t hear the words. in tv/film we call it “lip flap” and i just think it looks messy. also i’m trained to avoid it at all costs at work hahaha. it’s more for serious videos that this matters a lot to me (e.g. i think i did a really good job eliminating lip flap in my happy ending amv)—for comedy videos i don’t sweat it as much

i put audio fades on the start and end of every single audio clip i use, even if i don’t think i need it, to make sure everything sounds smooth

i use markers for timing, especially in action-y videos like what the hell. i’ll put a marker on the clip i’m using at the exact moment a punch lands, and in the song on the beat. if i have the magnet/snap in timeline tool on i can just easily snap them together instead of having to spend time finagling it

this is such a small thing but i dip/cut to black for a tiny bit at the start and end of every video. this way if i post with tumblr video player, there’s black between the loops, and it gives you a beat before the video restarts. i do this even on videos i post on youtube, just because i think it looks nicer/more professional

this is 1,500 words so i’m going to stop myself before i pull something. if you have follow-up questions feel free to ask and i’ll continue to add them to the vid help tag, but any more questions about sourcing clips or my process in general i’ll just link this post going forward. anyone who made it this far, i am sending to a telepathic kiss. thank you for reading and happy editing!

#i typed this all up at 4am so i'm just scheduling it to post sometime today #ask #vid help

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makeusfreefromthisfandom · 4 years ago

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How They Snapchat

A/n: yes I did everyone bc why not 😌✨ long post ahead but I had a lot of fun doing these! I hope you have just as much fun reading them!

❥Iwatobi

Haru

Is he even on Snapchat?

Lmao

He was forced to by Rin before he left for Australia

Haru forgets about it. The only time he posts are when he’s out with Rin and it’s Rin who’s the one posting for him

Makoto

Cats!

Omg he’s going to be posting snaps of him and the neighborhood cat

But he’s also posting snaps of him and Haru

most of the time it’s a Nagisa take over and Makoto’s memories are FILLED with Nagisa’s snaps and random videos

He won’t ever delete them ahaha

He’s the type who’s snap is always messing up lolol and he starts panicking about it too 😭

Never the one to leave you on read. A true king.

Nagisa

Ooffff

Yk those people on snap who have like 5 different private stories and are CONSTANTLY posting on ALL of them and somehow you are also on ALL of them

Yeah...

That feature on snap where you just swipe up to be added to someone’s private story? Nagisa is always doing that

There’s no point of calling it a private anymore

Also a spammer, doesn’t care if you do streaks or not

He’s the type who posts videos and pictures of his friends OFF GUARD OMG HES THOSE TYPE OF PEOPLE AJSJSJJSJS

And he gets it at JUST the right moment

poor Rei

Filters. Not the ones that make you look good. The weird ass ones.

Oh also that big mouth filter is his fav (yk the one that everyone uses when they need to rant ajsjsjsjsj)

Can you imagine him on tik tok LMFAO

Rei

Aesthetics ✨

Sunset/sky pics

Also it’s basically Nagisa running his snap too

Selfie e’rryday (courtesy of Nagisa ofc)

Gou

Selfies with the galsssss😆😝

So many swim team memories 🥺

Nagisa likes doing the whole “amosc” thing on her story too without her knowing xb

Has a private story but Rin’s not apart of it 😌🤚🏽

He gets super butthurt when he finds out tho bc the rest of the guys are

Why hasn’t she blocked Momo yet?😭😭😭

SHE DOESNT WANT TO SEE YOUR BEETLE MY GUY

I feel like she rants but she doesn’t even use that one filter to do it. The gorl says what she’s gotta say

But she still likes using the cute little filters tho <3

The group chat maker.

❥Samezuka

Rin

11:11 snaps

He has a whole separate private story for his sad hours and quotes

Late night workout/gym pics. With the time sticker

Also he’s the type to be posting selfies of him and his buddies too :b

snaps of his music

sad playlists

Thinks streaks are stupid but probably does them anyways ajsjsjjsjsjs especially if it’s someone he’s crushing on

ALWAYS checking Gou’s stories bc protective brother things

Always flashing his signature sharky grin

Those people that are confident and intimidating on snap but in reality they’re baby and soft🥺

Sousuke

Black screens.

Ceiling snaps.

leaves you on read

but it’s bc he doesn’t know what to even reply with

Doesn’t really snap like that, he mostly just has it so that it’s another way to keep in touch with acquaintances and friends

Will once in awhile get snaps from Aii and Momo which he’ll just laugh and smile to

Aii

He has a group chat on there for the swim team

He’ll send snaps to Rin and Sousuke sometimes

Cant quite get out of Nagisa’s snap spamming tho, he’s considered blocking

Momo

Do I even need to say anything?

Pyunsuke.

Period.

ITS JUST HIS FREAKIN STAG BEETLE

captions the snaps with things like “isn’t he precious 🥺” “GUYS PYUNSUKE LEARNED A NEW TRICK!!!”

Has a whole story dedicated to “Pyunsuke’s Adventures”

Please all the boys have left that priv story

Aii stays tho bc he’s nice like that

Regrets it everyday.

Also big bro Sei likes to take over his snaps from time to time

Seijuro

He’s got all the fan girls yo 😎🤏🏽

Work out snaps

Swimming snaps in his speedo

Face snaps

He also succeeds in getting selfies with Haru as they’re on the same swim team now 😎🤏🏽

Exposes the younger mikoshibas’ baby pics

NEVER lets the chance go to take a snap when all the mikoshiba siblings reunite

❥Highspeed+Hiyori

Asahi

Inspirational quotes on his mirror selfies

Ooooof Kisumi takeover 24/7

I feel like he’s into aesthetic snaps and phone photography too so yeah lots of coffee shop aesthetics

He still does streaks :b

Forced to have one with Kisumi

Never snaps him back tho

He likes posting his nephew too 🥺

He ends up getting a kick to the face right when he snaps the pic tho

The type to be like “dhmu”

“Only the real ones know”

Kisumi

Has to document all his coffee/food runs

His “vlogs”

Kisumi. Omg KISUMI. He’s that ONE friend who has embarrassing pictures of EVERYONE

Omg you cannot tell me that he’s not a little blackmailer with a smile plastered on his face 24/7

Jkjk

You sly little fox

The exposing type aksjjsjsjsjsjs also my fellow key smasher 😎

That one person who’s always recording at just the right moments

He does streaks too! Although the one with Asahi was completely unintentional and now they’re over 300 days

Pretty selfies all the time! 💖

Has like 1000+ friends and claims to know them all

What can I say, he’s a popular guy~

Ikuya

s t a r s

Askskksksjs

Not the type to really post, more of the type to just watch

An occasional selfie with Hiyori

Sometimes he’ll be sitting at the park or smth with a nice view and he’ll decide to snap a pic

Always has swipe up on Asahi’s stories to remind him of his stupidity

A lot of snaps from Natsuya of his travels or what he’s doing atm

The only person he’ll actually regularly snapback to

Those late night snaps/texts from a special someone never fail to bring a small smile to his lips tho🥺

The type to watch his monthly recaps and 1/2/3 and so on year agos

Natsuya

T r a v e l s

The airport at 4am

The plane

MIRROR SELFIES 🤤

FACE SELFIES 🤤🤤

lots of Nao snaps haha, most of them are saved in his memories tho

He actually has tons of selfies with a bunch of new people that he meets in his travels like Rin!

He also gets Ikuya into taking a selfie with him ;b

HIS SMILE 🥺 omg he’s always flashing a smile in his snaps 🥺

Also doesn’t really do streaks, but he likes to let his close fellas know what he’s doing and where he’s currently at so they unintentionally start anyways

Gets asked for his snap a lot- too bad he’s claimed me as his wife 😙

Nao

Doesn’t really use Snapchat that much unless he’s talking to like the 4 closet people he knows including Natsu

Also more of a watcher than a poster

Wait that sounded wrong akskksks-

Like I mean he watches others’ stories rather than posting stuff on his own

Wait why do I feel like he actually watches those snap stories yk like the buzzfeed ones and dailymail, etc 😭😭

Tends to leave Natsuya on open

Hiyori

Stalks Ikuya on maps

Ok but he doesn’t really post on his story unless it’s a selfie with Ikuya

Or he just wants to share his coffee shop/library aesthetic akaksksksk

More of a memory keeper

Like his memories are definitely filled but he doesn’t always post them

Never leaves you on open. Thinks it’s wrong. Will always snapback/reply 🥺

OH OMG YK WHEN U ACCIDENTALLY POST SOMETHING ON YOUR STORY AND IMMEDIATELY REGRET IT LIKE YK THOSE MOMENTS?

That’s literally Hiyori but he would d i e

LMAO

Too scared to screenshot anything too

I think he also secretly watches those subscription and publisher stories

Taglist: @starbornecentral @enai-jigoku @allieturs @syrenblubs @todominica @kkbear @thatfreeshit @lowkeystasha @animatedarchives @cha0tically0rganized @ourfallenthoughts @akaashirin @ever4wolf (let me know if you would like to be added or removed!)

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nastyatticman · 4 years ago

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If Slashers had horny Tumblrs...

What it says on the tin! HC post for if Jason, Bubba, Brahms, & Billy (Lenz) had their own tumblrs for horny content. (18+ only)

If you like these, feel free to send a request for other characters if you want :D

Contains : adult content, discussions of kink & brief mention of sexual harassment

Jason Voorhees

Very barebones bio that gives some basic info - his age, his gender/pronouns, and a warning this blog contains adult content.

Doesn’t get updated often, and it’s usually all at night. Mostly consists of content he reblogs from different creators (artists/sex workers, etc)

Don’t expect a fancy theme or anything - he only uses his phone for horny content since he shares a computer with his sweet old boomer mom.

A good mix - largely pictures people post of themselves or art he likes. Sometimes he’s in a Mood and reblogs a bunch of very specific kinky posts - text posts with affirmations from doms, risqué art, gif sets of people in gear.

He doesn’t have a huge following or anything, just a handful of mutuals and spam bots he doesn’t clear out frequently. But when he posts anything he thinks could be too intense he makes sure to tag it with warnings, just in case.

Sometimes leaves little compliments for people - he’s usually too shy to message people directly but he’ll reblog their posts and say nice things in the tags. Nothing too forward, usually things like “you look so handsome here!”

Bubba Sawyer

Makes sure not to put any identifying info but he usually puts his age/vague age range (“in my 30s”) because people ask for that.

A collection of stuff he likes, mostly pictures or gifs or the odd video or audio post.

A lot of mostly vanilla content - again, what turns him on, what he can jerk it to easily. Stuff he can focus on when he’s really trying to get off. I feel like he’s more likely to reblog a gif set of people just going at it or pictures of a hot person in lingerie or cute undies than anything with too much of a kink/fetish focus. But not always.

I’m not sure if our Bubba can read/write very well so I can’t see him reblogging or writing long text posts, but there will be a few short ones here and there.

He’s a little too nervous to post intimate pics publicly but I can see him on a very very confident day posting pics of just his hands after seeing people talk abt how they like strong hands.

Again, doesn’t write a lot, so he doesn’t add comments to reblogs or anything

He may leave nice things in tags tho! Like Jason he sometimes leaves little compliments for people whose content he reblogs (ur dress is so pretty!). Sometimes he tags things with certain emojis that seem to have some kind of meaning… a mood he’s in… or maybe they remind him of someone he likes?

Brahms Heelshire

VERY detailed very organized pinned post with info about him including a list of his kinks, and what interactions he wants/doesn’t want. Also, places to send him tribute. Not that he needs the money, of course, but he wouldn’t mind if you got him something off his wishlist. (Wink wink nudge nudge.)

I see him as a switch who leans heavily towards submissive with a bratty streak. However people tend to assume he’s more dominant since he reblogs more dom centered text posts (he’s usually imagining he’s the sub in those scenarios).

Has a decent following since he will periodically produce a lot of original content - mostly text posts, or audio, and the occasional picture where his face is obscured and no naughty bits are showing directly. He errs on the side of caution since he doesn’t want to get struck down by the tumblr nipple police, and also because are you kidding me his family has a reputation to uphold, he can’t afford to get caught

Tumblr is his main horny platform of choice because he finds it easier to organize content he likes into an archive, and there’s more privacy. He tried making an nsfw account on other platforms before, but because of linked accounts and email fuckery he got recommended to follow a family friend and nearly shat himself. (He has a good handle on privacy and he knows that person couldn’t find him - he double checked his privacy settings after that - but it still scared him off that website, at least for that purpose.)

Because he has a decent following he also has a few mutuals he’s messaged periodically. He’s varying degrees of close - some only know him from his posts, some know his main tumblr, some may even be following him on other platforms as “long distance friends”

Every once in a while debates about having his own server for his simps followers, but he’s not sure about using his discord where he keeps in touch with friends/family for it or making a new one. You’re welcome to message him if you’re mutuals or you send him some cash first ❤️

Billy Lenz

What do you mean, “horny on main”? What, like you have an alt?

His blog is like, 98% porn but every once in a while he’ll reblog a non porn post to get into an argument.

“You sure have a lot of opinions on Canadian politics for a hentai blog 🤔”

Mostly an archive of stuff he finds hot at the time, without rhyme or reason - reblogs, links to other websites, etc. mostly chaos, but it seems like every once in a while he tries to have some kind of tagging system.

He sometimes posts original content - sometimes rambling text posts about the kind of sex he wants to have, very rarely pictures of himself. that he deletes immediately after in fear of getting flagged.

When it comes to audio posts… the Moaner lives up to his name. Although he’s not skilled with recording - clearly doing it on his phone - His audios aren’t half bad if you can find them. Usually captioned with something about how he made them or what he was thinking about when he made them.

Let’s be real, canon Billy had like no concept of consent. Or just didn’t care, because he wanted to scare and intimidate people. He’s definitely been blocked by people for sending creepy messages/asks or adding unwanted captions to their posts. When he wants to hit on someone in a way that means they may reciprocate, he’s nicer, but people are still (understandably) put off by him.

At his most polite though, he’d be the type to send an ask to someone saying he hopes they come to Toronto so that he can eat their hot pink cunt and make them cum on his thick tongue and fat, juicy cock. (This is regardless of factors like their actual location, whether or not they have a cunt, or travel guidelines due to the pandemic.)

#slasher fandom #jason voorhees #bubba sawyer #brahms heelshire #billy lenz #slasher imagines #lemon #nsft #noises from the attic #first post like this im nervous #who would u follow tho? i can see myself following brahms tbh #nasty attic originals

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fanfics-for-the-hockey-fan · 4 years ago

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My Treasure - William Nylander

Request: Can you do one where you are pregnant with William nylanders baby and getting hate and he makes you feel better

Getting pregnant at 24 was definitely not a part of my 5 year post college plan. Then again falling in love wasn't one of my bullet points either. But when my period was over a week late I knew that everything was about to change. William was thrilled when he saw the bolded word on the pregnancy test, immediately wanting to tell anyone he could. I was a little more hesitant to share the news.

I knew that I wanted children someday and those feelings intensified once my relationship with William became serious, I just figured we would be married and I would be a little more secure in my teaching job before we would add a baby to the mix. We told our families first and they were all excited and happy for us, same with friends and teammates. The real problem came when we started to share the news with the rest of the world. On William's social media everyone was happy for us and wishing us well, but mine is where all of the hate went.

She probably got knocked up so he couldn't leave her.

Hopefully you don't gain too much baby weight, you could already stand to lose a little.

You're not even pregnant with his kid I bet, just went to the guy with the biggest paycheck.

I did my best to delete the comments as soon as I saw them, hiding them from William so he wouldn’t get upset. Some people didn't get the hint after the first deleted comment and I would end up blocking them. Two weeks after announcing our pregnancy the nasty comments were outweighing the nice ones of my post. My pregnancy hormones went crazy one day when my pants didn't fit for the first time of the pregnancy and William was away on a road trip until the morning.

I canceled my plans to go get dinner with some friends and instead had a pity party in some of William's clothes with ice cream and reading through all the horrible things that were being said about me.

I can't believe he is still with her, she is not pretty enough for him.

Fat cow

You are going to ruin his career with the child.

I cried myself to sleep on the couch after midnight and didn't wake up until someone was brushing some hair out of my face. Slowly opening my eyes I saw a concerned William kneeling on the floor in front of me. "Ellie, what’s wrong? Were you crying?" I sat up, making room for William next to me before he pulled me into his lap. "Your friends texted me last night and told me you skipped on going to dinner with them. Is everything okay? Is the baby okay?"

"The baby is fine, I just couldn't find anything that fit comfortably with the bump. I had a pity party with ice cream and must have fallen asleep." Everything I said was true, I just left out one major thing.

"I'm sorry babe, but can I finally buy you some new maternity clothes? Please." He gave me puppy dog eyes as he begged, causing me to laugh and turn to face him more.

"You love shopping more than I do."

"Is that a yes? I'm taking that as a yes. Go get ready, shopping might take all day." With that he was carrying me down the hall, laughing the entire way. When he finally set me down I managed to find a t-shirt dress that wasn't too uncomfortable and proceeded to get ready.

***

After a full day of shopping William took me out to dinner at our favorite Spanish restaurant. I excused myself after we ordered a bunch of small plates to share to run to the bathroom and when I got back William was standing at the table with a large plastic bag and shaking hands with the owner. "What's going on?"

"I thought you might be more comfortable if we went home and ate. I've kept you busy most of the day so I know your feet must be bothering you." His tone was off but I brushed it off as we headed out. The drive home was a tense silence without even the radio playing.

I didn't say anything until we were in the apartment and William started slamming cabinet doors as he got plates. "What's wrong?"

"I just don't get why people spend so much time trying to make other people down! Like, what does it do for them?" He had a fire in his eyes I had only ever seen on the ice, and I wasn't sure what was causing it.

"I'm going to some more context here. Did something happen at the restaurant?"

"Before we left the last store I took a couple of pictures for our shopping day and posted them to Instagram. I thought it was no big deal, just sharing what I was up to on a day off. And then when you were in the bathroom your phone started buzzing like crazy so I thought someone was trying to call you. But all of your notifications were for Instagram, and I know I shouldn't have opened the app on your phone but I thought maybe it was your girlfriends' group chat and Sophie finally got engaged." I let out a small chuckle at that, we basically were taking bets on when her and her high school sweetheart would finally take the next step.

"I'm guessing that isn't what you saw." I knew what he was going to say next but I was hoping with every fiber of my being that I was wrong.

"No, I saw the worst of humanity in your DMs. I just- how can people be so cruel?" William slumped into the bar stool next to me at the island as I reached for my phone having to see what was sent to me now. "Ellie…" I ignored his worried warning as I opened up the app, going to my DMs.

Fat cow, you only got pregnant so that you could lock in some who is far too good for you. I hope he sees he could do so much better and kicks you out before that baby ruins his career and life!

So you are just using him for his money. I bet the baby isn’t even his, probably a teammate who makes less. Whore!

Bitch, why are you even with Willy? He is a literal hockey god and from what i can tell you are just some stupid high school math teacher. He can do so much better than you.

There were over 50 messages just like those, all sent within the last hour. I didn't even dare look at the comments on my latest post, even though it was a few days old the braver trolls put their nasty messages there for the whole world to see.

"How long has this been happening?" I had hopped off my stool, going to plate up the food we brought home and trying to avoid the conversation I knew we needed to have. "Ellie… Please talk to me. How long?"

"Honestly, since we started posting that we were dating. It's gotten worse since we posted that we are gonna be parents."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because part of me thought that if I just deleted the messages and comments that it wasn't real. That if I was the only one who knew that I could just pretend that it was all in my head. Then there is that stupid voice in my head that likes to play up my insecurities, that made me feel like if you saw what people were sending me that you would believe it. And I know that thinking that is stupid and unrealistic but it can sometimes be the loudest thing in there." William also got off his stool, coming to stand right in front of me. He kissed my forehead before cupping my cheeks and holding eye contact.

"Min skatt, never feel like you have to hide this from me. You are the one I am in love with and want to spend the rest of my life with. You are the only one that can make me smile and laugh when I am in a bad mood after a game. You are the only one I see myself growing old, and possibly bald with." I let out a gasp at the word bald, he was so protective about his hair.

"See, the rational part of me knows all that."

"Well, let me make it clear to every part of you. I love you with every fiber of my being and as soon as I meet with your father next week to ask for his blessing, I will be asking you to marry me."

"Will…"

"But I am going to need you to act surprised when I ask." That got a small chuckle out of me.

"I'll do my best." William's stomach growled then, making both laugh. "Let's eat before your stomach starts communicating with us again." William just nods, a thoughtful look on his face that I'm sure would cause problems later but right now I just wanted to live in the happy moment.

After reheating the food and settling at the kitchen island to eat, I went through and deleted all the DMs and comments. I barely registered what they said as I deleted. What I didn't know was Will was looking at the comments as I deleted before pulling out his own phone. It was only when my phone buzzed with another notification that I found out what he was doing.

@williamnylander tagged you in a post

The post was two pictures side by side; the first was from our first date at a Christmas market, all bundled up and snuggled into each other as we took the photo in a mirror. The other picture was a selfie he took of us at my last doctor's appointment for the pregnancy, both of us were all smiles as I sat on the exam table with a picture of the sonogram on the screen behind us.

Two pictures of the love of my life. One from our first date, where I was a clutz and spilt hot chocolate all over her light grey coat and she still agreed to a second date. The other from a few weeks ago when we got another look at our baby.

I can say without any doubt that having Ellie in my life has only made it better. She has become my sounding board for when I'm frustrated, my motivation to score more goals, and my ray of sunshine on any cloudy day.

I knew from that first date that Ellie was the one for me, no one can tell me otherwise. And now she is carrying our first child. My heart continues to grow and fall in love with this amazing, kind, dedicated, caring, loving, and perfect woman each day.

I am so lucky to spend time with you each day and anyone who says otherwise is wrong and jealous of what we have.

Min skat, I am so excited to watch our family grow and experience the joys and challenges of parenthood with you. Ellie I love you and can't wait to see where we go next.

Together.

The tears started flowing before I even read the caption, the pictures enough with my pregnancy hormones. But the words William managed to write push me over the edge, I was crying at the love he put into the words but also laughing at the not so subtle 'fuck you' to all the nasty people who sent you messages.

"Did I overstep? I don’t want to embarrass you."

"It's perfect. You're perfect. I love you."

"I love you too, and I plan on showing you that everyday. Even if it is something as simple as an Instagram post."

"It's not just the post, it's that you are saying to all the people who see your pictures and then come trash talk to me that you know about them. And that will probably stop some of them from doing it again. And anyone who doesn't get the message gets blocked."

"Good. Now, let go watch some TV and cuddle." Nodding grabbing my plate of food, following William to the couch before curling into his side.

As William pulled up the next episode of a show we were binging, I thought of something. "You never have told me what 'min skat' means."

"It means 'my treasure'. And it reminds me how lucky I am every day to have you in my life."

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dreadpoetssociety · 4 years ago

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Reasons To Get A Puppy

Prompt: hi! could you write a spencer x sister and she just hangs out at the bau as much as possible and even when they’re on cases she just hangs out with garcia the whole time and also she could have animal pics on standby since they cheer garcia up after looking at details of cases

Note: I know this is incredibly short, but I actually really enjoyed writing this one up real quick. I LOVE Garcia and I can only imagine how she would get along with Spencer’s younger sister. Thank you so much for this prompt, I hope you enjoy!

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Spencer Reid x Sister!Reader

Words: 939

You ran out of your seat as the last school bell rang, signaling the end of the day. Smoothly, but somewhat aggressively, you rushed towards the student lot to the car you’d bought yourself a few months ago with money you’d earned from working multiple jobs over the summer. It was used, a little beat up, but it stood out in a parking lot and it was yours. You loved it to death.

You hopped into the driver’s seat and scrambled for your keys. It wasn’t long after you turned on the car that you ended up at the building that housed the BAU. Technically, you needed a federal I.D to park in the garage, but the employees gave up on trying that with you, since they knew you would (and had) found another way in.

Having used one of your brother’s old I.Ds to get through the first few sets of doors, you greeted everyone on your way upstairs to where he worked. He wasn’t there, though. Spencer was out on a case in the Middle Of Nowhere, Oregon, but that’s not who you were there to see, anyway. Sure, having him show you everything was cool, and you tried to absorb anything the team told you, but something you took particular interest in was Garcia’s computer skills. It actually freaked you out a bit, sometimes, knowing that everything you’ve ever done, deleted or not, everywhere you’ve ever been, could be traced within seconds on Garcia’s computer. You were just thankful that Reid had decided to leave you your online privacy, because you would be embarrassed if he ever found your blog on tumblr. Those were things he never needed to see. But, thankfully, Garcia was incredibly understanding, and once secretly helped you by creating a program that protected that stuff from techno-hating Spencer Reid. It was never anything bad or inappropriate, of course, just your guilty pleasures.

You walked right through the glass doors, and a couple eyes glance up at you for a second. The other agents always found it weird that you were here basically every day. Some would ask why you didn’t hang out with your friends like a normal teenager. You replied that the BAU were your friends.

You walked down a hallway and opened up a door to see Garcia typing away. Then, you caught a glimpse of one of the screens to see some pretty gruesome looking photos. Contrary to popular belief, you actually hated looking at those. You did find profiling and everything incredibly interesting, but you absolutely hated seeing the things that happened to these victims, and if not that it made you squeamish. You almost cried every time.

“Hey, Little Reid.” Garcia greeted.

“Oh, Garcia, is Girl Genius there?” you heard Morgan over a phone call. You found it funny that Morgan always seemed to call you “Girl Genius.” You were no where near the level of intelligence your brother was at your age. You didn’t skip any grades, your report cards were good, though. But you definitely wouldn’t be able to tell someone the population of some random city off the top of your head. Also, you were bad at math. Astronomically bad at math.

“Sure is, Sugar.” she replied to him.

“Hey, Y/N! I’d love to talk, but I’m on a bit of a time crunch. I’ll tell the kid you said hello.”

“Thanks Morgan.” you laughed. You didn’t even have to ask him to say hi to Reid, he just knew. You heard the phone click, “So what’cha up to?”

“Oh you know, just a bunch of people being violently killed who have no relations at all. Typical Tuesday.” Garcia sighed. You both turned to the pictures on the screen, “This is the worst part of this job.”

“Yeah.” you replied. Garcia was like you when it came to seeing the victims. She took it personally, and you knew that it made her upset to see. So, you always had backup animal pictures saved to your phone, “Wanna see something?”

“Sure.” she said sadly. You pulled out your phone.

“I’m trying to convince Spencer to let me get a puppy, but I can’t decide on which kind.” you showed the phone to her and she instantly smiled. She grabbed the phone and scrolled through the countless images of little puppies.

“Oh my god, Y/N, you have to get this one. It’s so cute I could die.” she laughed, showing a picture of a little Pomeranian, “Good luck convincing him of anything, though.”

“I’m trying so hard to come up with any argument that he would have against me so I can be prepared, but I don’t know what I don’t know and he knows literally everything.” you said, “Oh no, Garcia, the little spotted one has my heart.”

“If you get one, you should name it Penelope. I’ve heard that’s a nice name.”

“What if it’s a boy?” you asked.

“Then you should name it…” she thought for a second, “Penelope. I heard that’s a good name, too.”

You both laughed and looked at a few more puppies before she turned to you with a smile.

“Thanks, Y/N, I really needed that.”

“Any time, Garcia.” you answered back. You put your phone back in your pocket, and watched as your inspiration worked away, and within a few hours, the case was solved. By then, you knew Spence wouldn’t be back home until the next day, so Garcia offered to let you stay with her.

You spent the whole night looking at puppies, and coming up with a list of reasons as to why Spencer should let you adopt one.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x sister reader #garcia #penelope garcia #derek morgan #morgan #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #reid #spencer reid

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wordsandshawn · 4 years ago

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Secret | Part 1 | #ShawnMendesWritingCircle

A/N: I’m so excited to get to be a part of this writing circle. Thank you @saysweartogod-og for coming up with this amazing idea. This fic is a little spin off of a secret billionaire trope, and I can honestly say I’m so excited to see where some of the amazing writers participating in this decide to take it. I hope you enjoy this first chapter, and feel free to send feedback or thoughts about the chapter and where you think it might go, because my guess is as good as yours, and I’d love to talk about it!

WC: 2.6K

From the moment you met Shawn six months ago, you knew that letting yourself get involved with him was a bad idea. It took you about three seconds to come up with a handful of reasons why you could never let yourself fall for him, but it only took him one night to make you forget them all.

You stepped into his condo, spotted him, and knew who he was immediately before the words, “Hey, I’m Shawn,” Even fell from his lips. You told yourself you’d never come back here before you spoke a single word to him. You also vowed to kill Brian and Alicia the second you got them alone.

Brian is dating your roommate, which is how you wound up here in the first place. Alicia knows you rarely ever go out because you’re either working or studying, so when she found out you weren’t working for the first time on a Friday night, she practically begged you to come with her. She said she was meeting some of Brian’s friends for the first time and didn’t want to be alone. Despite you telling her that she’d obviously have Brian there, she refused to give up, and finally, you reluctantly agreed to go. You had no idea that Brian’s “friend” was Shawn Mendes.

At first, your only focus was getting through the party and out of the condo without anyone posting a photo of you online, knowing that photo would be circulated within minutes if it had Shawn in it too, and that’s the last thing you’d want. You didn’t expect it to be too difficult to avoid being in a photo with Shawn considering the condo was not small by any means, and there’s no reason for him to take any type of notice of you.

Even though you regretted accepting the invitation, you still decided to make the most of the night. Since you rarely let yourself go out, you were determined to enjoy the one night you had. You’re still nursing your first drink, despite it already being warm. As time passes, you watch as everyone around you becomes more and more inebriated. Phones are out, as they often are at parties like these, and you’re tired of hiding in the darkest corner you could find, so you slip outside. You’re not outside for even five minutes before you hear the sliding door open, the music drifting out from inside.

“Y/n, right?” Shawn questions, stepping outside, and you try to hide the shock on your face over the fact that he remembered your name.

“Mhmm,” You respond intentionally looking away from him.

“What are you doing out here?” He asks, taking the spot beside you by the railing so the two of you are standing shoulder to shoulder, except his shoulder is about five inches above yours.

“I could ask you the same thing.” You respond, not wanting to give him the real answer to that question.

“They’re all taking a lot of pictures in there.” He says, as though that’s an answer to the question, but it’s not.

“It’s your party, why wouldn’t you want to be in the pictures?” You question, surprised. You know why you don’t want to be in them, but you can’t seem to fathom why he wouldn’t want to be in pictures with his friends at his own place.

“Don’t want people to know where I am,” He says with a shrug. “What about you, why’d you slip out just now?” He asks again since you avoided the question the first time.

“Needed some air,” You lie, keeping your eyes trained on the city lights.

He doesn’t press the topic anymore. You’re expecting him to wander away, back inside to the party, but he doesn’t. Shawn asks about how you know Brian and you explain that he’s dating your roommate. To be polite, you ask him the same question and he shares that they met when they were six and on the same soccer team. For some reason, conversation comes easy with him, and you almost let your guard down. Almost.

After a talking for a while, he asks, “Can I get your Instagram?”

Suddenly you remember the promise you made to yourself earlier. “I don’t have one.” You say before slipping past him and heading back inside in search of the bathroom. You don’t need to see his face to know he’s wearing a perplexed look. When people hear you don’t have an Instagram, they look at you like you’re from outer space. That’s how ridiculous they think it is, and then they think you’re lying because you’re not into them. Even though you’re not lying, you never really cared if that’s what they thought.

By the end of the night, you’re just glad to make it out of there. Alicia is drunk enough that you drive her car back to your apartment, and the whole time, she’s mumbling about how she thinks Shawn likes you and about how Brian told her that he thinks you two would be good together. You tell her she’s talking nonsense, and Shawn would never like you like that, but deep down, you knew you already liked Shawn more than you would want to admit.

Brian gave Shawn your number, and you texted for two months before moving beyond friendship, even though you both knew it was heading in that direction from the very beginning. It took that long for you to finally be convinced that he was a safe person to be with. Shawn knew from the very beginning, before you even got together, that you did not want to go public with the relationship. He knew that you were completely off of social media, so it made sense that you wanted to keep your life private, and he agreed that it would be for the best.

Even after you got together, he was rarely ever in Toronto. He was busy traveling for work, and you were busy with work and Uni, so it was mostly a long distance relationship with a lot of texting and facetiming, but you’ve managed to make it work and treasure the small amounts of time you have together.

Shawn’s finally back in town, and you spent most of the day lazily hanging out. When night hit, a bunch of Shawn’s friends came over, including Brian and Alicia. This party feels a lot different from the last one. In that one, you were keeping to yourself, mostly in the corner or outside. Tonight, you feel like you can let your guard down, at least a little bit. Shawn had made it clear that his friends couldn’t post any pictures with him in them because he was supposed to be in Miami and his management would basically kill him if it got out he slipped away to come home to Toronto. Shawn was determined to come home for the weekend. He missed you, so he made a promise to his management that no one would find out he was here.

It worked out better for you because you felt like you were safe from worrying about pictures posted online. What you didn’t realize was that his friends never promised not to post pictures at all, just that they wouldn’t post pictures of Shawn. You’re standing around the kitchen island, laughing about something Alicia is saying when you spot Brian looking down at his phone. Out of curiosity, your eyes fall on his screen to see you and Alicia. He clicks post before you have a chance to say anything. In a second, you’re standing in front of him. “Hey, what did you just post?” You ask him.

“Don’t worry, it’s a nice picture.” He says, shrugging.

“Brian, delete it.” You say. He’s already drunk, and you’re starting to wish you had more than one drink because of the anxiety raising up within you. “Please, you have to delete that. Delete it right now, please.” You swallow your anxiety and fear, trying to keep your emotions from getting the better of you. It’s only now that you realize that you were basically screaming, and all the other conversations going on stopped because everyone is focused on you.

“Chill,” Brian says, but when you make it clear that you’re serious, he finally concedes. “Fine.” He deletes it, showing you his phone as he does so.

“Thanks,” You mumble before pushing past everyone still standing around staring at you and disappearing into Shawn’s room, slamming the door behind you. You pace across the room a couple of times before you hear a knock on the door.

You don’t say anything or make a move to open it. You’re still trying to calm your breathing and remind yourself that nothing happened. The picture was only up for no more than a few minutes. Everything’s okay, and you’re just being paranoid, at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself.

The door opens, and you turn to see who it is. Shawn’s standing in the doorway, questions swimming in his eyes, but he doesn’t ask any of them right away. You sit down on the bed, taking a deep breath, readying yourself to face him. He steps inside, closing the door behind him. “You okay?” He asks.

You swallow hard to keep your emotions down, “Yeah, I’m fine. I’m sorry about that.” You nod toward the door, but you don’t offer an explanation.

Shawn takes a seat next to you, “That wasn’t just about us keeping our relationship a secret, was it?” He questions softly. He’s putting the pieces together. Shawn wasn’t even in the Instagram story, and even though you know Shawn’s fans keep track of his every move and watch all of his friend’s stuff, you’re not delusional enough to think that if you’re in one story everyone will know about you and Shawn. But as soon as you realized that Shawn’s friends get tens of thousands of views on their stories, it worried you. You’re worried that someone would see it, someone who you didn’t want to see it.

“I’m sorry I freaked out.” You respond. “But you should get back to your friends. I think I’m just going to go.” You say, starting to stand up.

Shawn reaches out for you, taking your hand in his. “Please don’t go.” He says. “I just want to know what’s going on with you. Whatever it is, you can tell me.” He seems concerned. Even though you’ve only known him for a couple of months, you already trust Shawn more than you’ve trusted anyone else. But with all of his friends here, along with knowing he’s already had a few drinks, you know now’s not the time to talk about this.

“I really think I should go. I’ll see you later, okay?” Shawn doesn’t try to stop you again. He’s already made it clear that he wants you to stay, but if you want to go, he’ll let you.

You get into your car and drive back to your apartment. When you arrive, you see that Shawn has texted you a few times. He asks you to text him when you get home safely. He also lets you know that if you want to talk about what happened, he’s there.

You text him back, letting him know you made it home, but you don’t say anything about the picture. After replying to Shawn, you turn off your phone and get ready for bed, trying to fall asleep before you worry yourself sick.

The next morning, when you wake up, you’re surprised that you don’t see a message from Shawn. He must still be sleeping, you think to yourself before getting out of bed. After brushing your teeth and putting your contacts in, you start walking toward the kitchen in search of breakfast. You stop short as soon as you step out of the hallway because you see Shawn sitting at your dining room table. He looks up from his phone when he sees you.

“Hey, Alicia let me in.” He explains before nodding toward the donuts, “I brought donuts.”

“Thanks,” You whisper, pulling out a seat and sitting down.

“Can we talk about last night?” He asks, hesitantly.

You knew that you would have to tell him sometime, but you were hoping you could avoid it for at least a little while longer.

“My dad’s really,” You pause, searching for the right word, finally saying, “Controlling.”

Shawn’s eyebrows knit together, and he watches you closely. He doesn’t know where this conversation is going, and you don’t blame him.

“Both of my parents wanted me to go into the family business, but I didn’t want to. They didn’t want to hear it or even consider letting me do anything else. When I turned eighteen, I left. I got a scholarship to a university they never knew I applied to. I deleted all my social media’s and I moved away.” You haven’t spoken those words aloud to anyone, ever, and you didn’t realize they would be so difficult to say.

“You ran away?” Shawn questions, his voice barely above a whisper, and you know that he’s just trying to wrap his mind around all of it. It’s a lot, so you don’t blame him.

“I’m not a teenaged runaway. I’m not a missing person.” You respond, knowing how it sounds. “I was eighteen. I told them I was moving away to go to University. I just didn’t tell them which one because I didn’t want them to just show up or think they could buy their way back into my life. I needed to do it on my own.”

He’s not quite understanding how you could just cut your family out of your life, and you know it’s a difficult concept. “Buy their way in?” He asks.

“Yeah, knowing my dad, he’d do something like buy a building on campus or something and then make a whole show of dedicating and opening it, or find some way to show up and manipulate their way back into my life, and I just didn’t want that.”

“So, what does your dad do?”

“You ever heard of Ardes Corp.” Shawn’s eyes widen. Everyone’s heard of Ardes Corp. “My real name is Y/n Ardes. I started using my middle name as my last name, so people wouldn’t know.”

“Okay, but why go through all these lengths to still not be found by them? You clearly did it all on your own, putting yourself through Uni and everything. Why would it matter if they saw a picture of you online?”

“You know how I said I told them I was leaving, so I didn’t just run away?”

“Yeah?”

“Well it wasn’t the best conversation. They kind of disowned me, and I kind of don’t want them to find me and confront me or tell me I’m living my life wrong or do whatever they might do if they change my mind and try to drag me back home.” That may not be the full story, but you think it’ll be at least enough to satisfy Shawn for the time being.

When he nods, and hands you a napkin, you take it gratefully.

“I guess that’s why you won’t even step outside with me, huh?” He questions, opening the box of donuts.

You bite your lip, meeting his eyes and nodding.

He nods back, a silent understanding passes between the two of you. Even though you just threw a lot of information about your past at him, he doesn’t seem to be put off by it, instead, he took it all in stride.

“Thanks for buying the donuts.” You say, as he motions for you to choose first.

“You’re welcome.” He says with a smile.

You choose the twist and Shawn takes one with chocolate on it, and the two of you eat in comfortable silence. You have no doubt that Shawn has more questions, and there’s a lot more that he deserves to know, but he’s only here for another day, and you’d much rather focus on this delicious donut and the idea of some quality time alone with your boyfriend instead of rehashing your past.

#Shawn Mendes #ShawnMendesWritingCircle #Shawn Peter Raul Mendes #Shawn Mendes imagine #Shawn Mendes fic #Shawn Mendes Writing Circle

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