#I couldn't sleep at ALL last night so

[moonkhao]

hi.

[flufflecat]

Billtlest pet shop

[kamari2038]

Now that I've *mostly* cleared my head, A FEW THOUGHTS:

(1) Hank is really frickin’ passionate about the deviant cause. When Connor LETS HIM DIE to try and save the deviants, he’s mildly pissed but they’re still friends. But when my man is just DOING HIS JOB AND TRYING TO SAVE HUMANITY, Hank is not only aggressive, but so hostile that Connor can BEG FOR HIS LIFE, try to reason with him, point out the irony of believing all androids are alive yet still denying Connor’s personhood, but if Connor doesn’t have the heart to murder Hank first, then Hank will DANGLE AND THEN DROP HIM OFF THE EDGE OF A BUILDING EVEN IF HE LITERALLY SAVED HANK’S LIFE MULTIPLE TIMES EARLIER IN THE GAME (which is that much more traumatizing for my head canon of this Connor, which is that it took him an unusually long time to die after falling from the rooftop in hostage)

(2) Hank must fully expect that Connor is secretly a deviant and send him to Jericho with the full expectation that Connor will join the deviants, because otherwise this scene makes no dang sense.

Y’all, I still love Hank, but I am PISSED OFF about this. Just a reminder that he’s still only human and kind of messed up, I guess. Clancy Brown scares the SHIT out of me now. That look of helplessness and betrayal on Connor's face as he's held on by his coat above the ledge will haunt me forever.

[the-devil-is-dead]

some horror art !!!

tried doing some horror art after reliving my childhood trauma (my little pony creepypastas) and, uh, this is the result !!

the longer i stare at this guy the less unsettled i am, so i think i made a mistake somewhere along the way, but i can't really figure out what. all that i have left to do now is continue drawing uncanny things and hope that i get better at it! it was kind of fun so who knows, this might become my shtick.

any constructive criticism is greatly appreciated !! 🥰

[pix-writes]

Gravity falls AU idea I've had

Bill cipher is just some (charismatic, psychopathic) guy, except! He runs a cult at the time that Ford is deep in his research in gravity falls.

I'm calling it the Ciphertology AU (if someone comes up with something better I'm all ears tho)

Rest of it under cut (mentions tbob and same level of dark content as is in the book/website, just as warning) ⚠️

So, the university contacts Ford to ask him to investigate the psychic claims that this group deep in the forest, not too far from the falls, has. Ford grumbles that he isn't much of a people person to carry out such research but he's the one nearest to the area and they've agreed to send over Fiddleford, since they're friends and as his assistant he can act as an objective observer (since he didn't study parapsychology) and it pays well.

They both inadvertently get sucked into bill's cult in different ways! Ford is drawn in by his seemingly high intelligence and helpful nature, assured within himself that he wouldn't be fooled by fraudsters or fakes due to his background/intelligence, ends up treating Bill reverently (his 'muse' and one he trusts, because it fills the loneliness he feels, especially because before he began interviewing ciphers group, he felt guilt for not contacting his brother) before coming to a fast and cruel awakening that he's not who he says he is! Bill isolates him from his parents and tries to make him believe he's the only one who understands him, he obstructs his work being sent to the university too.

Meanwhile, poor Fidds had been pulled into addiction from the cultish hippie use of drugs in the group, but ended up slipping into mental health issues and realising that his friend is being manipulated and leaves. tries to persuade Ford to leave, trying to convince him that bill's evil but it doesn't go well ofc and he leaves and tries to set up a counter protest with a load of other people in gravity falls to get rid of the cult, which ends up kicking him out when he has a mental breakdown. By this time the FBI is alerted and they have the cult on their watchlist.

Ford is tortured, similar to how he is described to in tbob and journal 3 (except probably without the possession side of it, haven't decided if that's something he'd be able to do/is real in this au) and he's kept at the isolated cult camp against his will. But he does manage to get hold of a phone and call his brother. Stanley to the rescue! He isn't told fully just how bad it is but sensing bullshit, he high tails up to the falls as fast as possible ❤️

Stan is horrified by the way Ford's been treated and angry that he's still making excuses for the group (poor ford is so sleep deprived so the coercive control is going to take a little while to be unconditioned from) and quickly manages to get him out of there!

Takes a while, and not many people believe the stan twins story, but eventually Bill is caught for other crimes and is sent to a max security psychiatric hospital (basically a prison). (Stan and Ford in the aftermath keep close eyes on the cult from a distance to try and get justice.)

They end up forgiving each other and settling their home base in the falls, since now the rest of the town either hates bill or wants to forget he existed. Stan sets up his own tourist business in the falls whilst ford heals and eventually he ends up working as a lecturer and travels about to a few different colleges in the area for work. After the trial where Cipher is put behind bars decades later, the stans make their childhood dream happen and go sailing around the world for 2-3 years!

Oh, and Ford ends up reconnecting with Fidds, as after some time his son Tate tracks him down and gets him to a place where he can recover and be treated for his mental health. Their contact helps them both get through the trial because now they can finally talk to someone else who experienced the cult. Maybe they even contacted some others who were also drawn into the cult who were victims?

Dipper and Mabel come for the summer like in the show, except now they know of their two eccentric grunkles, though the whole cult story is kept from them for a while (they end up finding out somehow).

...And that's as far as I've got with this idea! I think there might be room for Bill to escape and the pines family coming across him during a future summer? Like maybe because of Ford's involvement with the cult he still has possession of some of Ford's journals/information after he escapes/is set free? Idk. What do you think?

[foreveralwaysanauthor]

I know you said in your comments on my last post that I didn't need to make you anything as congratulations, but girl, I've been concocting this thing in my head for the better part of a month and finally had the time to work it all together the last day or so. You're getting this thing one way or another! It's not perfect, but I've been watching edits for all sorts of fandoms with this song on TikTok for a while now, and it was too great of an opportunity to miss. Plus, this trend came about with perfect timing, so it works for both a mental plot eraser and a graduation gift all in one!

Now, although I'm sure you can piece it together yourself as it comes from your idea of what I've been calling The Playhouse Playoffs, I'm going to kind of explain how I thought things would go down/why I used the clips I did. However, first, please take a minute and fourish seconds to watch this thing that's been festering in my head for the last... I don't even know how long, honestly. Also, Tumblr screwed up the timing a bit in certain parts if you're watching it on a computer, but if you're watching it on your phone, it should be fine.

My take on the little story within the clips:

Part 1 - The camp is the gun.

If they're not riding together to camp, Riven and Vivien have a yearly race to the grounds to not only see who can get there first, but also who can be the one to claim Lakeside. Lakeside isn't a first come, first serve type of deal as their group (friends and family) always stays there, and Grandpa George and Nonna Dawn know this, but the person who claims it first gets to pick out group activities outside of planned events. Riven has beaten her almost every year, even when they were just riding down from Hill House on their bikes. In this case, Riven gets there first and is quick to see Nonna to claim Lakeside, but Vivien is more concerned with getting there with her friends for once and doesn't really care until he begins teasing her about it. Given her already rough start to the summer (as you saw in my preview of the first chapter), she finds it hard to take his light teasing as light.

Part 2 - The playhouse is the gun.

As the only two senior staff members who actually enjoy anything related to theatre (sadly, Carrie doesn't count as it's only her second year working there), Riven and Vivien are tasked with figuring out what show to put on. When neither can come to a clear choice in their meeting, Nonna suggests they do both - a battle of sorts to see who could take seniority for the next year based on ticket sales. Vivien, in a desperate attempt to prove herself capable so that her grandparents know the camp is in good hands when they eventually hand it off to her, agrees despite dreading how hard she knows she's just made her summer when she wanted nothing more than to enjoy her time with her friends.

Part 3 - Carrie is the gun.

As you've established (and I love), Riven steals Carrie away before Vivien has the chance to. Frankly pissed off by her lack of opportunity, she takes out her frustration on Riven, who reminds her that she had the chance to snatch Carrie up early, but was too caught up with everything else to even try. Despite her reluctance to admit it, she knows he's right and backs down, but the stress of everything is mounting, and she refuses to return to Lakeside that night as she knows Riven will have his show's crew over for a script-reading party, resigning to watching from afar.

Part 4 - The shows are the guns.

In my opinion, a lot will have happened between the initial reading party and the actual shows - apart from the obvious passage of time, I mean. While Riven’s been gliding through things without much stress due to having Carrie and a few stragglers from Vivien’s group on his side, Vivien’s been struggling with making things as perfect as possible. On top of this, things have been rocky in her personal life. She-who-must-not-be-named has been poking her nose where it doesn’t belong, rumors have been spread like wildfire, and the people she cares about have been keeping so many secrets that she feels like she’s drowning. Now, two days before the weekend their shows are set to perform, she finds all of the handmade costumes she and her group have worked so hard on sitting torn to shreds in a mud puddle after a particularly rough storm. The only person other than herself who has access to the locked area of the playhouse where they're keeping the costumes is Riven, making her believe that he must have had something to do with it despite his claims that he had no idea. Things get fiery between them as Vivien unleashes all of her previously withheld thoughts and emotions, and Riven argues that if she thinks he had anything to do with her show crashing and burning like the literal fire in the script, she must not know him at all. Riven walks away to pour his feelings into making his show great while Vivien picks up the pieces of the mess she's created and tries to figure out a way to get things back on track.

Part 5 - The actual performances are the guns, and it's not just the two of them reaching this time. The casts are reaching too.

After everything blows up between their directors and neither returns to the cabin that night, the two casts join forces the next morning to fix things without their directors' knowledge. They find ways to repair the damages done while Butchy and Miles try to talk Vivien out of her lockdown at the Hill House, and Carrie works on prying Riven out of his basement. Butchy convinces Vivien to at least try talking to Riven after his show's final rehearsal and, despite herself, she allows them to drag her back to the camp and waits out back for the cast to leave before slipping inside to talk with him. They've never really had a falling out before, and it takes a while to work through things with Vivien on the brink of an emotional breakdown and Riven sitting there, stonefaced, but they talk nonetheless and decide to work everything out as much as possible before the weekend so that they can comfortably enjoy each other's shows and go back to something resembling the "normal" they're used to.

I'll leave it at that for now, but just know that I have a lot of ideas for that storyline and really needed to get them all written down so they wouldn't bounce around in my head for the foreseeable future. I hope you enjoyed my little video and the thoughts behind each part, but honestly, El, I love this idea for Camp Wanamaker and am so excited to finally be able to post something for it!

[heybaetae]

.

[running-in-the-dark]

my niece is staying with us for the whole weekend for the first time. until now it's always been one night only, not two.

it's the second night now and I have already decided this is not happening again anytime soon. I'm so fucking exhausted. it'd be less exhausting if it was my nephew, I think - he's older and also doesn't need as much help (even when he was her age).

I love my niece but she just asks so many questions. like when we're watching a show or a movie, even if it's one she has seen before (even multiple times), she doesn't understand what's going on and constantly asks me to explain everything. I don't mind it, really, but it does take a lot of energy. plus tonight it took over two hours for her to fall asleep because she was scared by the noises of the house and the nearby road. I get it, but damn I'm so fucking tired, I just want to sleep 😭

[skitty-kirby]

I don't usually talk about these sortsa things so weeewooo Think my wisdom teeth are coming in, or at least two of them- I turn 23 next month so I'm kinda late to the game it seems. ._." My whole right side jaw/ear is in violent pain, spanning my upper and lower back teeth. No new ones spotted yet, just pain. Very sudden. :') Probably won't be very active until the pain subsides cuz like. OW.

Heee hooooooooooooooooooooooooooo send help and lots of ibuprofen Skitty out

[lethesbeastie]

I miss being able to do more than 3 things in a day.

There's something wrong with my body, with my brain. Something I haven't put a name to yet, though I've got hypothesis of what it might be. Something is plaguing my body, weighing down my limbs, my heart, my head.

Do you ever feel as if you live your life wading through water? Like you've been drowning for years, chained by your ankles to am impossible weight, struggling inch by inch across the open ocean floor?

Probably not.

I'm starting to realize the way I live is far from mundane, farther still from humane. I struggle to eat. Struggle to shower. To stop. To rest. Like a shark underwater, I swear on God it feels if I stop moving, I will drown.

I can't stop moving, can't sit still, can't escape the static that starts to stutter up my spine the moment i try. It hurts to sit more than it hurts to move, more than it hurts to grind my own joints into dust, chasing the slender phantom of nervous system regulation.

Stimming, I'd said. That's what the pacing is, that's why I have to stay on my feet from the moment I leave my bed, that's why I can't ever, ever sit still.

I'm not so sure about it now.

It hurts to sit still. Hurts to move. Hurts to think and think and think, to have ideas, to want to Make, but to be denied release by the exhaustion that plagues my body.

I'm tired. So tired. I am tired of feeling tired, of feeling both everything and nothing at all. Nervous system circuits short circuiting inside me, I'm impatient with my own exhaustion, desperate to do anything except to search for rest. No one has ever taught me how to rest.

There is something wrong with my body. Something I'm trying to name (something that the doctors will claim is nothing at all), something haunting me, parasitic in its nature, in its pupputeering of my aching, shaking hands.

I want it to get better. Want to stop feeling half dead and less than alive when I rise to greet a day that's almost over. Want to stop seeing the disappointment in my mother's eyes when once again, I cannot gather myself into some semblance of humanity long enough to do the god damned dishes.

I'm trying to fix this mom, I promise. Thank you for doing the dishes for me. I'm sorry I can't get better fast enough. Yeah, I'm tired of my bullshit too.

[avinox]

Orym (any pronoun) warm up after only sleeping 3-4h today.

Background and inside of the robe are taken covers from The Sandman, since this character was heavily inspired on those comics

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

also i bought travel insurance. i don't think travel insurance covers you if your own travel was perfectly planned and executed but the people you were travelling with fucked up and therefore you ended up stranded without a means of onward travel but. y'know. it's the thought that counts

[yo9urt]

uraaaaaaagghh

[roman-sunshine]

Me: yeah I'm a pretty chill person overall.

Me when a restaurant doesn't list all the stuff they put on a burger and I end up vomiting and nauseous for the next 36 hours:

[aliresix]

WIP TAG GAME

Rules: In a new post, show the last line you wrote and tag as many people as there are words.

ty so much for tagging me, @spacejammie-eimmajecaps!

The exact moment he asked for the second time, he wished he had never done it.

tagging: @4mph1b10us @its-a-journal-of-ideals @nastyaex @totallymyapples @themultifandomdisaster @demolitionlovrsskk @ anyone else who wants to, really!

[melit0n]

EUCLID ANALYSIS.

Part one -> Title and meaning

Part two -> You're already here!

Part three -> Line by line analysis part two

Part four -> Musical/intrumental notes

Part five -> The Night in Sleep Token

Part six -> Conclusion

“Just run it back, give me five whole minutes” → The song itself is five minutes and 13 seconds long, but Vessel only starts singing these lyrics at the 13-second mark. As the listener, you give him five whole minutes to say what he’s gotta say, but he still asks for more time. I see it as a representation of humanity. A set lifetime to do and say so many things, to change in so many ways, but it never seems to be enough.

A realisation, a revelation almost, develops across this song; change is inevitable, and that’s okay, and that having a set lifetime, having five whole minutes, is entirely what makes people human. What makes humanity.

“Thick tar on the inside burning” → This is a vivid description that can symbolise depression. Tar is a very viscous liquid that causes physical damage (rashes, headaches etc.) by merely touching it, plus, it’s very easy to get stuck in it; to let yourself be consumed by it, like depression. It’s used in literature as a metaphor to represent the feeling of being weighed down or emotionally trapped, afterall.

It could also be in reference to the visualisers for the whole album, which ends in a black liquid pouring out of the album art creatures.

“I’ve got a ghost in the hallway grinning” → This is both a callback to ‘The Apparition’, and a symbol for the past. Ghosts are relics of the past; haunting places and people they can’t let go of because they don’t know how, which means the Ghost in the hallway grinning can either be about Sleep, the people in Vessel’s past, or about Vessel himself.

Grinning is typically associated with joy, however, in this context, it adds a much more ominous feeling to the line. It implies that The Ghost is mocking Vessel with his past, finding amusement in his suffering at recalling what he wants to leave behind.

“And a heavy head that won't stop turning” → This describes how Vessel is burdened by his past that just won't leave him alone. He’s constantly kept awake by memories that taunt him, keeping him in a state of emotional turbulence.

“If my fate is a bad collision” → Callback to Granite and its foreboding theme of car crashes. ‘Bad collision’ suggests a sense of inevitability and a negative outcome. An argument in a car that goes a little bit too far and ends badly. However, what’s interesting is the comparison of fate with collisions; it illustrates the feeling of Vessel being caught up in circumstances beyond his control. His past, present and future are controlled (by Sleep) and he can do absolutely nothing about it.

“And if my mind is an open highway” → This line flows perfectly with the previous lyric. In contrast to the presented idea of fate as a collision, this line portrays Vessel’s mind as a vast, open space symbolised by a highway. Highways are typically associated with freedom, movement, and endless possibilities, but, matched with the previous line, the freedom becomes terrifying because of the way Vessel has spent his known life following fate. It becomes predestination versus free will. Divinity versus humanity. Lore-wise, it creates a perfect representation of Vessel as a vessel; a human holding a God inside his body and having to deal with it.

“Give me the twilight two-way vision” → Yet again, lyrically, duality is brought back. Twilight is the transition zone between day and night and it symbolizes mystery and threshold between opposing states. The choice of twilight over sunset or dawn, for example, suggests a desire for a moment of transition, change, as opposed to the stark clarity of daylight or the complete darkness of night. Vessel does not want the past, daylight, but he does not want his present either (night).

Further, The term ‘two-way vision’ introduces the idea of seeing life from two different perspectives, which could be about Vessel’s past and present self, Vessel and his partner, or Vessel and Sleep. The concept of this dual vision implies the recognition of the coexistence of opposites. It could also be in reference to Higher’s “‘Cause I look for scarlet and you look for ultraviolet”.

“Give me one last ride on a sunset sky lane” → The phrase ‘one last ride’ implies a sense of finality or a farewell, which links to the theory that Euclid is a eulogy above all things. Vessel is asking for one last good thing before he leaves– changes– for good. A change between day and night is yet again brought up here; sunsets bring the night, which “comes down like Heaven”; it’s the last few minutes of time Vessel has to himself before he has to devote the Holy hours of the night to Sleep. The end of the day is a time often associated with reflection, and contemplation and is one of the transitions from day to night, which is also right before twilight.

“Call me when you get the chance” → Can either interpreted as a message from Vessel to his partner, to Sleep or vice versa. The echo-y effect placed on the lyric makes it feel almost like a voicemail as well.

“I can feel the walls around me closing in” → With this lyric, the previous line can now be interpreted as a plea for help. A ‘Please help me, but only if I’m not an inconvenience. I know we are not what we were, but I need your comfort again’.

Further, walls built up around people are typically used as symbolism for boundaries; metaphorical walls put up around a person to stop them from getting hurt. Vessels’ walls are collapsing in on him because he’s changing and learning how to trust again (which is good), but it scares him enough for him to try and go back to the past. Go back to the ghost in the hallway grinning. Overall, it creates a very claustrophobic and visceral image.

“Just running forwards, a life like wires” → Wires, robots and algorithms are referenced a multitude of times throughout the whole album, which this lyric carries on. Despite it all, the vessel is running through the complicated mess of wires that is life. To quote Genius; ‘the path taken has been inevitable. The wires will continue to carry the circuit forward, and instances of life are inevitable, similar to how some view life as being ‘written in the stars’’. Which means, again, fate and predestination are being referenced.

“As I see the past on an empty ceiling” → Vessel’s memories continue to haunt him, no matter how far he runs from them. However, Vessel is still running despite it all. He’s accepting the limited amount of time he has as well as that whatever has happened is in the past now.

Plus, an empty ceiling quite literally suggests moving out and moving on; the bare ceiling which doesn’t have all the familiar stains on it reflects what once was like a mirror for him.