#I could go into so much depth about this

[macdenlover]

we don’t acknowledge enough how dee used to be a pageant winner when she was a kid and how much damage it did to her. she worked her ass off and got recognition for being pretty and talented at a young age and it was the only source of self esteem she could garner in a family that constantly berated and talked down to her. she sought after that external approval because it was the only way she could prove everyone around her wrong. her dream of being a performer didn’t come from a self-aggrandizing delusion— she genuinely showed a lot of potential when she was younger. but she went through an unflattering puberty and her spinal condition got worse and that natural talent she had as a kid plateaued way too early. the “former gifted kid” dilemma. she slowly lost the thing that promised her that she was good, but she was so desperate to keep holding onto it that she tried anyway. again and again and again no matter how much people made fun of her because it was always about proving them wrong. but after a while she couldn’t jump anymore without anticipating the way it feels when she hits the ground face first. self-sabotage became her way out, choosing to rather live in the fantasy of her own unrealized potential and blaming those around her for her lack of success, than having tried and crashed again. she’d rather buy lottery tickets over and over and never scratch off the numbers than to see that she lost. that self-sabotaging behavior bled into other aspects of her life too, from friendships to relationships to therapy. her own short lived success is what made her grow into embodying the cycle of failure.

[stinky-bus]

Dream SMP relapse is real and it hits you like a fucking 18 wheeler

[purgatorygrl]

There is a scene where Arthur goes to the camp after Guarma and finds Dutch talking to himself commenting on a chess move and I find it curious how the chess move that Dutch is commenting on is a famous chess move where pawns are sacrificed in order to win.

[gbirrd]

1/9 - Babs Gordon tarot card designs for Complete Candor by @vexfulfolly as part of the @batfam-big-bang

Read the fic here!

Other cards:

1-Babs 2-Cass 3-Bruce 4-Tim 5-Damian 6-Jason 7-Duke 8-Steph 9-Dick

Image ID

Image 1:

A design of "The High Priestess" tarot card. It has the texture of recycled paper and reads "THE HIGH PRIESTESS". A symbol of an eye is visible behind the numeral "II".

Barbara Gordon sits in her wheelchair facing forward with a laptop that has a glowing Oracle symbol on it. Her glasses are the same green as the symbol. The bottom part of a clock face is visible behind her, illuminating her in a pale yellow.

Image 2:

A design of "The High Priestess" tarot card. It has the texture of recycled paper and reads "THE HIGH PRIESTESS" upside down. A symbol of an eye is visible behind the numeral "II".

Barbara Gordon sits in her wheelchair facing foward with a laptop that has a glowing Oracle symbol on it. She has taken her glasses off and is holding them in her right hand to reveal pupil-less white eyes. Semi-transparent green eyes form the shape of her Batgirl cowl over her face and a large neon green eye glows brightly behind her, backlighting her in the same green. The entire design is upside-down.

[pyjamaart]

kobd and their professional third wheel B)

[bugsinshoes]

"HEYA ROMEO"

[bonebabbles]

Scenes like this keep cropping up and I cannot help but roll my eyes all the way back into my skull

Don't worry guys, having NEW children fixed him. This famously teaches a violent man to stop hitting kids and makes him no longer feel the need to construct nightmarish scenarios so he can humiliate and embarrass those he has power over. Men whose wives produce lots of babies for them are Very fulfilled and Understand how strong bonds are supposed to be

"Instead of advising him he'd been defensive" is a REALLY INTERESTING way to phrase "got so offended at the suggestion to stop murdering women for their land that he shoved his son's face in a festering wound and told him to leave him to get eaten by maggots."

I wonder how they'd spell something like, "walked through a patch of thorns so that his son would be in physical pain and then belittled him for finding an alternate route because he wanted him to suffer" and "lied directly to his face about why he abandoned him when he realized the child could be useful"

[oddberryshortcake]

Jamil Viper and his Inferiority/Superiority Complex

Chapter 6 provided a deep dive into Jamil’s psyche with an outsider’s perspective on it (being Leona’s) and there’s so much I can say about it, because now that Jamil’s issues are being seen outside of his internal dialogue, there’s a lot of deep-seated complexes and trauma that makes him act the way he does, and all the while Leona is losing his patience while also trying to give him good advice and tough love.

Jamil switches between having an inferiority and superiority complex once he’s put in a life-threatening situation with someone stronger and smarter than him. 

All throughout Jamil’s life, since childhood, since he was born, he was meant to be the capable one. He was the smartest, he was the most skilled, he was meant to protect Kalim. 

The adults in his life trusted him to protect and die for Kalim, and despite being miserable in his situation, he got satisfaction from being a more capable magician than Kalim. Somewhere, deep inside, he enjoyed the fact that he was viewed as intelligent, strong, and talented, even if it was always overshadowed.

 He was so used to being the most capable person that when he tried to do his ‘protecting important person’ act to Leona, he was blindsided by the fact that Leona is incredibly capable and even stronger than him.

Leona didn’t need him for protection, Leona didn’t need him for anything. It was Leona who was covering for Jamil, who protected him when Jamil was injured and being pursued by phantoms, Leona was the one who lifted and used the thunder spear. 

Jamil’s perceptions of himself were shattered. What gave him worth in the eyes of the adults in his life no longer mattered. What gave him confidence in his abilities and a feeling of misunderstood talent and superiority didn’t matter. 

Jamil doesn’t know how to be the one who is protected, who is weaker, who is not the ‘smartest person in the room’ that he usually believes he is. He feels like he rather risk his life alone than be a burden, his repression starts showing itself more obviously, and his self-esteem drops down hard.

So as they traveled through Styx, Jamil flip-flopped between being deeply insecure and still thinking he knows best. Leona trying to redirect him into accepting help, taking a rest, not looking down on people who utilize their skills, and acknowledging the skills Kalim has that he doesn’t end up eventually pushing Jamil to allow Leona to help him, but it isn’t without Jamil wanting to endanger his life because that’s all he knew. 

Leona pointing out his superiority complex unraveled the inferiority complex underneath. If he isn’t the strongest and smartest, then who is he? He wants to be separated from Kalim, but who is he if he’s next to someone who is more skilled than him? Who is he if he isn’t the strong one, walking into danger to protect someone else, utilizing his unrecognized talents to the fullest? 

At the end of the day, Jamil finally allows Kalim to help him with something. It isn’t a lot, just grabbing some tableware, but it’s infinitely better than him doing everything by himself, stressing but relishing in being the only person he can rely on. 

His arrogance is a clutch, something he developed and clung to that kept him mentally separated from his peers. Leona poked holes through that perception of Jamil’s self, now he’s faced with knowing that he isn’t some misunderstood genius, that he’s smart but he still has a long way to go, and he’s holding himself back by not accepting his faults or any help. 

His childhood of being a bodyguard, of being expected to give all of his well-deserved victories away, of being expected to risk his life and die to protect someone else formed this perception of himself being the only person he can rely on in him. 

Having it shattered unearthed just how much of himself was reliant on the conditions he grew up in, and how he has so much more room to grow and change if he’d allow himself to.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

what is your favorite thing about charles and your favorite thing about erik? separately, as in what you like most about their characters :]

a devious question this one is, my friend!!! it's hard enough for me to explain my thoughts cohesively, but having to pick ONE thing i particularly love is difficult. with characters like charles and erik, theres been so much done with their characters over the decades and so they have so many components to them that make them so interesting and fun to observe. BUT I TRY FOR YOU TODAY. under the cut i kinda ramble and the size of this text box makin me anxious

i think if i were to be simple and broad, what i enjoy most about charles is his determination to help others, even if he isn't really thanked and/or if people don't even like him. ofc, this isn't to say he hasn't done wrong- to be honest, the fact he does wrong/questionable things at times is another aspect of him i really enjoy, maybe because- broadly speaking- he's meant to be altruistic (intent vs outcome and all that). i don't know if that's super exciting to most people, but it is for me

as for erik, my reason for liking him is easier to explain tbh. To Be Simple And Broad, his progression from villain to antihero over the decades has been fun to observe (as much as i have so far anyhow) and analyze. i think to be a bit more specific, him using his rage and pain as justifications for his villainous actions is definitely what compels me the most: hurt people hurt and the sort, an idea i've always found interesting (something something vicious cycles and the like). yet now, he recognizes this wasn't really. A Just Thing To Do and is beginning to change that, which i enjoy

[ganondoodle]

im pretty sure i mentioned all these things before but its too late to start drawing anything and each time i see someone talk about totk i just get sad and frustrated again

literally by FAR the biggest problem about totk is that it REFUSES to connect to botw in any way beyond reusing the same map and character models, and even taking the things botw had established and ruin them entirely

ancient hero? BAM weird sonau dog thing that remains completely unexplained and out of nowhere eight heroine myster- BAM just some guy long gone sonau peopl- BAM here they are and they have zero connection to the ones of botw mystical dragons gracing the skies with their presence- BAM probably some dude who ate a magic pebble once strange mystical nature god you could rarely encounter in one specific spot and the area was made to feel utteraly unsettling but also divine- BAM now hes everywhere and only serves you as a shorthand for man pointing at cave the strange energy all shiekah tech was powered with with certain locations being ones where alot of it was concentrated including beneath hyrule castle clearly stating that somethings up with that- welp theres evil guy donw there but he has zero connection to all that lol

the whole shiekah tech thing, i just- WHY???? LIKE THAT??? there was so much stuff in botw that seemed deliberately placed that there IS more to it and now it all vanished and nothing of that mattered??? i saw a video of someone comparing certain places directly and on some where towers literally broke away tons of debris where just like .. sanded back down like nothing ever happened???; the fuking mechanism of how the towers and shrines and the pillars around the castle worked AND WHAT THE BOTW BOSS ARENA WAS ACTUALLY FOR?? its all gone and replaced with dirt; tHE ANCIENT FUCKING FURNANCES UTTERLY GONE AND REPLACED WITH ROCKS HUH???? so nothing of all that talk about their mystery and mechanism mattered???? the luminous stoens and its connection to spirits and how concentrated spiritual energy might have been what powered the tech- like you could connect things, and they made SENSE, so much sense that that seemed like it was intentionally setting up- only for it all to be just GONE?? to literally say lol it all vanished and that we shouldnt worry about it- like what the FUCK (and it also AGAIN doesnt make sense in itself bc WE SEE GUARDIAN PARTS in the towers, and some parts of them too are made of clearly shiekah tech stuff so it cant all have vanished- all their mystery doesnt matter bc idk it just works i guess lol and its not even called shiekah tech at any point either its just there and also not lol-)

(and even the smaller things like .. where the fuck does link live if everyone treats him like a goddamn stranger in the town you had to buy a house in botw for it to not be demolished and now that house is there but its not yours and noone knows you??? sth i personalyl found strange too that dumsda, the guy you help build an entire town, taburasa, had a very specific talking quirk i loved, and its all just gone in totk too, he talks like any other person all of the sudden

also at the end of botw finally being reunited with zelda and giving you the taste of being in the game WITH her at the same time in the intro to totk- WOOP away she goes! shes your pretty prize at the end and nothing more, what a way to disrespect her and her character..)

imagine if majoras mask didnt have the opening like it has and it otherwise stayed the same and they tried to tell you that its a direct sequel happening exactly where ocarina of time happened in the same world, zelda who?? ganondorf who??? things seem weird and off? lol dont worry about that :)) that would be weird and not make any sense at all now would it??

... sorry going on another rant again, ill just never be able to accept everything from botw didnt actually matter, and despite what some people might say, its pretty hard to ignore totk bc i LOVE botw, and as much as i hate it, they are connected in canon, even if it makes no sense

[somewhat-insane]

Wukong losing Macaque was a very necessary part in furthering their relationship.

Explanation under the cut. (S4 Spoilers)

I've been in friendships before like what Wukong and Macaque had. Macaque, the person I was most like in these friendships, was absolutely DEVOTED to Wukong. I mean, look at the way he looks at him.

And he was aware of how devoted he was. He knew the effect Wukong had on him. That's where this anger comes from when the others are questioning Wukong's loyalties.

He was willing to give Wukong EVERYTHING. He was willing to follow him into a battle for a cause I don't really think he believed in. And I don't believe Wukong really even noticed.

Wukong seems to be a very emotionally driven person, he acts quick on his anger

Is shown to be sentimental

AND seems to have a habit of cracking jokes to lighten the mood when he or someone he cares about is feeling stressed.

It's apparent that he feels and cares very deeply about and for those near him, but I don't think that even registers in his mind. He's just grown... comfortable. He doesn't need to think about it because in his mind, this is how it will always be. It was enough for him. I don't even know if he planned to overthrow the Jade emperor as some grand act of justice, I think he just wanted to hang with his buds. He even refers to it as "cheeky mischief" with Macaque.

Macaque, appears to be more logical of the two. And he tries to get Wukong to see what he's missing but...

Wukong isn't exactly known for his listening skills.

That is, until he's forced to listen. Until he's forced to think before he acts.

It's a classic story of "you never know what you have until it's gone."

[gladiatorcunt]

han solo wants what atton rand has

[beevean]

I spent way too long on this

Addendum: I forgot to specify, in the Isaac/Dahlia intersecion, "complicated relationship with their sister who is the only person who sees good in them and wants to save them from their sins"

(and perceived *by others fuck it graphics are hard)

[rawliverandgoronspice]

given that seems to be the new popular take in the fandom at large since totk got out: let the record show that I'll gladly let myself get repeatedly manipulated by the wind waker speech and be foolishly moved by its implications over rejecting space for humanity and vulnerability in the monstrous and the dispossessed, and then feeling weirdly smug about severing that fleeting attempt at connection and deem it obviously insincere

[rapha-reads]

To those of you wondering (aka no one), I finished both The Vampire Armand and Merrick and I have a lot of thoughts and feels. I'm skipping Blood and Gold for now to go directly to Blackwood Farm (I'll read B&G later), but first I'm going to read something else, just to take a break.

TVA thoughts: man, Armand is messed up. And extremely compelling. But so messed up. As always, the theme of faith crisis, which seriously reaches new heights with these bitchy vampires, is not something I can fully immerse myself in, but it was fascinating to see his numerous metamorphosis. I liked how he bridges Western and Eastern Christianisme, especially through art. Now I'm thinking that if Rolin Jones makes him originally Muslim in the show, that could expand even more the conversation on how faith, and especially Abrahamic faith, has been in conversation for thousands of years and could be such a rich, diverse and spiritual, intellectual and artistic theme. I can already imagine some fascinating discussions comparing (not in a superior way but in a complementary way) coming from Muslim faith to Roman Catholic faith, the way book!Armand talks about the richness of his life in Kiev Rus despite the poverty and ascetism, and the richness of his life in Venecia despite the luxury and abundance.

As for Benamin and Sybille... I don't have much thoughts about them. Sybille is one of those female characters AR seemingly favors, not so much human as a nymph or a dryad, "perfectly splendid". And Benji is a caricature of an Arab child. Nuance? 401 not found.

Merrick thoughts: David for the love if everything, shut. The. Fuck. Up. Holy moly. I like David, I do, but damn the entire recollection of his history with Merrick was looooooong. I'm here to see Louis haunted by Claudia and haunting Lestat's coma, not how hard you're pining for the kid you practically raised! Also. ALSO. You're just going to leave that whole thing with the Olmec or possibly another more ancient Mesoamerican civilisation without ever giving us more? That was the most interesting part of it all! The vodoo history, the connection between Louisiana and Caribbean vodoo and old Native South-American religions! More about this, less about Merrick's perfect breasts, I am begging you. (It is at this point that the reader of this post realises OP is 100% definitely ace and more interested in books and witchcraft than breasts and whether a 70yo man can still get it up - also, hey, Anne Rice's vampires are practically asexual and their lust and pleasure is mostly derivated from blood, with some notable exceptions like Armand and Marius, and a love relationship between two vampires is then based on romantic love and blood sharing, so can I hear a hell yeah for some ace representation or are we still conflating eroticism with sex)

Another thing I kept thinking about throughout the book is how Louis is perceived by his fellow vampires. Since basically the second book, since we've lost his own POV, everybody who's ever said anything about him (so Lestat, Armand and David) have insisted on two points: how very weak and meek Louis is, and also how irresistible, beautiful and charming. Granted, I've known Louis first through his portrayal on the show (hi Jacob you're so fiiiiiiine), and then through his own narration in the first book, but I've never had the impression that he was weak. Beautiful and seductive, yes. Weak? I see a human man going through tragedies and still enduring, going through vampiric transformation and then suffering for decades the loss of his humanity, struggling with reconciliating both sides of himself, but mostly I see a vampire who rebuilt himself after losing everything without sacrificing his sense of self. I see Louis as very strong actually (up to the point where resilience breaks, because resilience cannot be sustained on a long term, but that's another debate). He knows who he is, and don't you know how hard that is? He doesn't cling to faith or pride. He knows he's doomed, he knows he's monstrous, he knows there's nothing he can do to change that, and instead of railing against his fate, he goes on about his undead life. He gets his books and he reads them, he surrounds himself with literature and what little comforts he thinks in his shattered self-esteem he deserves (his ragged sweaters and soft trousers); let's not lie to ourselves tho, Louis doesn't like himself, or more exactly he doesn't care about his corporeal body - what matters to him is his mind, and once again, this author is extremely ace and also very aro and very nonbinary, so Louis to me is very much ace and agender coded, though really not aro, because his love for Lestat (and sometimes his fondness, shall we say, for Armand) is the only thing that can rouse him up from his literary slumber.

...

Oh, man, I have a lot to say about Louis, for how little he appears in the books so far. Still have BF, BC and the PL trilogy to devour. So I guess you can say, for as much as Lestat is occupying my entire brain, very much like him, my favorite is Louis? Yeah, that tracks. Melancholy, quiet, dark-haired green-eyed monster with more humanity than humans, preferring his solitude and the company of books to anyone else, hopelessly and helplessly devoted to one person, expert in brooding and grieving, literature specialist, not very attached to his physical self. Yeah. I'm not surprised.

[ruporas]

hello hello! I hope you don't mind me dropping by but I just want to say I love your art so much, the way you draw vashwood is just so sweet and tender but can I just ramble about the way you draw Vash especially? More specifically, the way you draw his expressions when he's looking at Wolfwood???

I just LOVE the way you draw Vash's expression because the way you make him look at Wolfwood is so soft 😭😭😭. There's just something about it that's so tender, like whenever I look at Vash's expressions in your art I just think "that is genuinely someone who loves another person with all their heart" and it just mends and breaks my heart at once, you capture Vash's love for Wolfwood in ways I can't explain 👏

It's unbridled love mixed with the fear of hurting Wolfwood in their relationship. It's wanting to spill so much affection but holding back in fear of messing up. He looks at Wolfwood like he's longing for him so earnestly be it pre-relationship or even when they're already dating it's just so??? 💕💕💘💞💖💖💞💕

There's just something so tender and heart wrenching at the way Vash looks at Wolfwood in your art, it gets me really emotional and I hope you have a lovely day/night for real <33!!!

ouuuuu thank you so so much for your kind words and for taking the time to tell me this T_T !!! i'm glad my expressions for vash's longing gazes at wolfwood is well done enough to have this sort of response to it…

he's the kind of person that has to hold back in both words and touch when it comes to love, when it comes to wolfwood, but i think it's a difficult emotion to restrain, especially when wolfwood is kind enough to let it be.

ultimately, what they're allowed to have is the inevitable shared spaces during their travels, it's the other's physical presence, being next to wolfwood, being able to take him in through the way he simply exists. smelling smoke, seeing smoke, seeing the cigarette between his fingers, seeing the crosses littered across his person, the rosary snug around his neck, his scruff at his chin, messy bangs, messy hair, tired eyes, the canine that peeks when he speaks, and a voice carrying heavy words, but honest, and kind, and one vash could never get tired of hearing, like how he'd never be tired of just looking at wolfwood.

it's of gratitude, it's of sorrow, it's of grief, it's of love, praise, adoration, it's desperate and it's full of yearning. at first, it's a gaze he feels he has to be satisfied with until he's learned that he's allowed for more and at that point, when wolfwood has given him so much, how could he look at him in any other way?

in any case, i def like to make it known and parade around vash's deeeeeep deep deep feelings of love towards wolfwood, so i'm very happy to know i can express that clearly through his expression alone. i Also just love wolfwood so maybe the projection goes from the heart of the artist to the heart of the art.

i ended up collecting a few caps of his expressions just out of curiosity for myself :3 i have much to improve still, i'll keep on drawing vash's loving self until i can get the ultimate loving expression down!!