#I care too much. It sucks when I want more of people than they can or will give

[pupuyvs]

Race of Your Life

pairing: sophia laforteza x fem!reader

wc: 5k+

warnings: car accident???? its in f1 though so..

a/n this is a req which can be seen here and here, sorry anon for how long this took 😅 anyways i may further this universe we’ll see though 🫣 ps. this is inspired by romain grosjean crash at 2020 bahrain grand prix (dw no one died he actually got away with burns on his hands and sprained ankle) so if ur curious as to what everyone wouldve seen u can search it up (its not graphic so again dw)

Formula 1. A sport known for its riches, flashiness, and speed; all aspects that pulled you in.

You were ten when you went to your first grand prix, the seats terrible due to them being a bonus given to your dad by his company, but you didn’t let that hinder you. Hearing the sounds of the cars as they raced by, the crowd cheering, feeling adrenaline as the cars came close to each other — you were hooked.

Your parents were hesitant when you showed interest, karting was expensive, and well, you were a girl. But you were determined, telling them you would die if you couldn’t do it, you regard this memory as being very dramatic, but it worked. Your father, clearly exasperated by said dramatics, made a deal with you, he’d help you in karting, but you couldn’t quit, no matter what. And being the stubborn ten year old you were, you agreed.

And thus you started.

The first year was the hardest, girls weren’t the most common in karting, add on to the fact you weren’t rich it was like you practically had a sign on your back saying, “pick on me!” But you didn’t care, you were there for one thing and one thing only, racing. While your parents fought for you verbally, you fought on the track.

You found yourself more often than not on the podium, losing was not something you could afford.

As the trophies racked up so did the respect, arguments were hard to have when you couldn’t back it up when it came down to it. And it continued this way as the years went by, karting turned into Formula 4, then 3, then 2, and it stayed that way for a while.

Women hadn’t made their break into Formula 1 yet, you were good, but it seemed not good enough for them. You watched as your friends began to make their transition into the top of the league, and you were happy for them, but it was also bitter to watch them get chances that you couldn’t afford yet.

Until 2021.

Mclaren had just released their driver line up for a younger, newer lineup for the 2022 season. Your longtime friend Oscar got called up first, you were happy for him, he was one of the few people in karting who was kind to you, so to see him awarded for his talent you couldn’t be happier. But you didn’t know that Mclaren didn’t just want Oscar, no, they wanted to be first in everything, not only racing.

Your signing made headlines everywhere making Mclaren happy, especially with the word “history” attached to their name. But with this came pressure, a huge amount of it too.

Your first season was much like your first year in karting — rough. The drivers are kinder this time around, well most of them, it’s the garage this time. You were iced out from most of your team, aside from the team managers and Oscar most of the team didn’t want you there.

That wasn’t the top of your worries though, sure it sucked, but you had bigger issues.

A drivers car is essentially a part of them, an extension of them if you will, they can only drive as well as their car runs, and your car did not want to work with you.

You knew it wasn’t because of the team, they would never purposely sabotage you, winning was more important to them than anything else.

It was hard on you going from top of the grid, podiums a normalcy, to being in the back of the pack. What used to be single digit placements became double digits with a swiftness, with each result you could feel your seat being taken from you, you needed a win.

The Italian Grand Prix was famous for its long straights, practically begging for speed. It was one of the later races in the season, a race meant for grabbing points to cement your position in the driver’s cup or the team cup. But it wasn’t just that for you, there was talks about replacing you if you didn’t give results soon, and you couldn’t allow that.

You were starting in fifteenth place, not an uncommon place for you, and you had to get at least in the top ten if you wanted even a chance of being considered to stay. Adrenaline coursed through you as the lights turned off and the race began. It was a battle for places in the first turn as always, and you luckily succeeded in snatching two leaving you now in thirteenth place, a good spot but you needed more. And it seemed your car understood that too.

For the first time that season you felt like you were back to your old self. The joy you felt as you passed car after car was euphoric after months of not having it.

The race ended with you seventh place, but it might as well have been first to you. An eight position climb was uncommon and hard to accomplish, but you somehow had done it and your team was ecstatic. Your career only went up from here, no longer were you in the bottom, you had found yourself back in the top, not quite podium but it didn’t matter you were still scoring points for your team.

At the end of the season you and Oscar ended up in the top ten for the drivers cup, and were re-signed immediately.

But as the new year rolled around you felt something was missing.

The 2023 race season started off strong, the team had worked vigorously on the car and your team was faster than ever. Now instead of finishing in just the top ten you often found yourself in the top five, which should’ve made you happy, but something was off and you wouldn’t know what it was until Miami.

Celebrities weren’t an uncommon sight in Formula 1. The glitz and glam of it practically called to them like a siren song. Hence why when Katseye's schedule had coincided with the Miami grand prix Hybe had immediately sent them.

The company had gone all out getting them all access passes, anything for promotion they had stated.

The tour around the paddocks was fun, even with the cameras in their face due to content being filmed. But of course something had to go wrong.

Sophia wouldn’t say she had a terrible sense of direction, just not the most perfect. And truly it wasn’t her fault!

She had stepped away to get a closer look at one of the cars, and when she turned around her group was missing.

The leader part of her would’ve asked for help, after all it’s the responsible and smart thing to do, but the new idol side of her didn’t want to be a burden so she decided she’d find her members herself.

It wasn’t the smartest idea, and she’ll admit it each time she looks back on it. This sport comes down to milliseconds at times, each team making changes to beat the others, so none of them will take kindly to a random person walking around.

As one of the employees of the team yelled accusations at her, Sophia only had one thought she was getting fired. That is until you showed up.

Sophia will always say she found you charming when she first laid eyes on you. Your voice, your calming smile and the way you lightly grabbed onto her wrist to guide her away, everything about you was just charming.

When you finally reached a seemingly neutral spot you let go of her wrist and turned to her, a soft smile on your lips.

“I’m assuming you’re part of that girl group touring today?” The question shocked Sophia, she hadn’t expected any of the racers to know about them.

“Yes, and I swear I wasn’t trying to steal anything or spy or whatever else that man said. I truly got lost. I didn't mean any harm or anything like that, me and my group are good peopl-” You cut her off with a laugh and a shake of your head.

“Calm down, I know,” you told her, “I doubt other teams are using singers to spy.” You hold your hand out for her to shake.

“I’m Y-” It’s her turn to cut you off.

“Y/N Y/L/N. I think I’d be crazy not to know who you are.”

And it was true, you were a sought after prospect due to just how much of a commercial success you were. After the Italian race the endorsements practically came running in which Mclaren praised, their name attached to such big names did nothing but raise their stocks and publicity, it also helped their sales skyrocket since more and more women were buying their cars. With all these positives teams were practically foaming at the mouth to sign you and your publicity.

You laughed shyly at her response, “Right.” You said as you rubbed the back of your neck. You cleared your throat once the red in your ears disappeared.

“What’s you and your group's name?” Sophia gasped at the question, feigning offense. She laughed as you panicked rushing to apologize. Sophia stopped you before you could ramble.

“I’m just joking with you,” she started, “I wouldn’t expect you to know us just yet, we’re pretty much in that stage before debuting.” You sighed out in relief at her words, nodding in understanding.

Sophia realized she still hadn’t said her name, “I’m Sophia, the leader of Katseye.”

She cringed slightly at the clear training that was drilled into her. And you noticed it too as you struggled to not laugh.

“Well Sophia, leader of Katseye,” the playfulness is clear in your voice, “Where is the group you are currently leading?”

She rolled her eyes at the clear teasing, before she realized she had no idea where her members nor staff were.

“I…actually don’t know.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Well, did they mention where they were going next?”

She stops to think about the schedule the guide had told them, furrowing her brows, “Mercedes?” You groaned at her words, which had worried her.

“Did I say something wrong,” she asked.

You quickly shook your head, “No, it’s just it will be a bit difficult to bring you given..” you trailed off as you raised your hand to point to your team logo on your shirt.

She nodded in understanding however before she could offer to leave you alone and somehow find her own way, you spoke once more.

“I’ll just have to bring you just outside their garage, so I don’t get encaptured in rumors of cheating and conspiracy and all that.” You stopped with a laugh at just how ridiculous it was.

“Okay, but are you sure?”

You nodded, “I am. Come on.”

As you two walked, you found yourselves falling into a natural conversation. She told you about the show her group formed from, which you promise to watch later, and you told her about the first race you won.

It was the happiest you had felt in awhile, it’s there you realized what was missing.

So when you had reached your stop you found yourself struggling to say goodbye. What you hadn’t known was Sophia was struggling too.

“Thanks for walking me,” she finally said, breaking the silence you both created to avoid it ending.

“Yeah of course, it was fun.”

“Really,” she asked while raising an eyebrow. You nodded, scratching the back of your neck nervously.

“Well,” she trailed, clearly trying to buy time, “I should go in and find my members.”

She waited for you to say something, and when you didn’t she frowned believing she had read the whole situation wrong. When she turned to walk away though, you called for her.

“Can I have your number?”

Sophia stopped, silent as she felt relieved by not being wrong. However, her silence gets read wrong by you and you beat yourself up for possibly having overstepped.

“I don’t have my phone on me right now, you know filming and stuff, but if you give me your phone I can put my number in and you text me, when I get my phone back I can text you back.” You nodded and handed your phone to her, quite desperately too. As she entered her number her members walked out of the Mercedes area, and practically screamed when they saw you and her.

You jumped as they barrelled towards the two of you.

“Hi, you’re Y/N, right?” Lara asked you. You nodded with a small smile.

“You must be the Katseye members.” The girls all started to freak out as they realized you knew them. You laughed as you accepted your phone back from Sophia, which garnered the attention of Daniela, but she stayed silent as she remembered that there were cameras around.

And she wasn’t the only one that remembered the cameras as the girls’ managers came forward, “Would it be okay if we took a picture and you guys filmed a quick video together?”

You hesitated, “My manager isn’t around,” you watched as Sophia pouted slightly and immediately changed your mind, “But I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

And based on the girls’ reactions you know you had said the right thing. After taking a picture with them and recording a video saying people should check them out, you said goodbye to them, sending Sophia one last smile.

You and Sophia started talking frequently after this day, messaging each other whenever you could. You asked her out on race day, seeing it as the best time since her and her group would be leaving the next day.

She had said yes immediately, and so after the race instead of attending the usual party you had raced over to your hotel to get ready.

When you had arrived at her hotel she hesitated when she saw your car, her friends had warned her to be careful with you, racers didn’t have the best reputation for dating. It hadn’t helped your case when you showed up in a clearly expensive and flashy car.

She pushed the warnings to the side when she saw you leaned against your car, a gift bag in hand and a shy smile.

Her members, who had followed her under the guise of safety, though she knew it was out of pure nosiness, all rushed to get a closer look at the car. The rushing clearly shocked you as you jumped, she laughed when you looked at her for help.

When she hadn’t moved you instead moved away from your car, which was now being opened by Megan and Yoonchae, who screamed when the door went up instead of out. You stopped just in front of her and took in her beauty, a smile had automatically found its way on your face.

“You look stunning,” you had breathed out. You blushed when you noticed she had heard you. You cleared your throat to fight the blush that fought its way to your face.

Sophia jumped when you held up a small gift bag in her face. Shock had crossed her face when she opened a jewelry box and found a diamond bracelet in it.

“I hope that’s okay,” you said. “My manager and the lady at the store said it was a perfect gift for the first date.”

Sophia could only scoff in disbelief, “They said diamonds are great for a first date?”

You nodded, but quickly shook your head when you had seen the look on her first. “I knew it was stupid, I should’ve got the necklace, if you want I can take it back and get it traded.”

However when you tried to grab the bag Sophia had immediately pulled it back, “I never said it was bad, just surprised. Thank you.”

You nodded once more before you gestured towards your car, which her members had been taking pictures in, “Ready to go?”

She simply nodded and you both entered the car, after saying goodbye to her members and promising Daniela that she could drive it one time.

You had taken her to an expensive steakhouse that resided along South Beach. It was awkward at first, you being nervous and her trying to figure out if this was all a ploy to feed your ego.

It wasn’t until she spilled her wine on your shirt trying to hand the menu to the waiter did the awkwardness finally stop. You laughed as she tried to wipe your shirt with a napkin, a dried one at that, and reassured her that it was fine, because truly you liked her so much it didn’t bother you even a bit.

You had stopped laughing when you noticed she was truly panicked, you lifted your hand and lightly grabbed hers and reassured her once again that it was okay.

When she noticed you were serious she calmed, and your dinner finished without a hitch. After dropping off the five extra meals you had bought for her members at your car you both walked along the beachfront and enjoyed the business of the nightlife.

You two talked about nothing and everything until her manager texted her telling it was time to come back.

This date marked the beginning of what would be your two’s relationship. It was rough at first, with you traveling so often due to races, facetime had been essentially a third in your relationship.

However, you didn’t let the distance hinder you guys, as you had bought a house close to the group’s apartment and had visited her every break they had given you.

Which led you guys to where you are now.

“God I don’t know how you guys don’t get lost here, this place is huge,” Manon says as she places the snacks she bought on the table. She doesn’t receive a response as all the other members rush to get their favorite snacks first, the slight chaos makes your parents laugh.

It’s an action that would’ve gotten them scolded by Sophia but she was too busy eyeing the door to the room.

It wasn’t often Sophia could come to your races, being an idol in her first year meant she was busier than ever, but any time she did get to go she was always a nervous wreck, only being calmed when she would see you before you went down to the grid.

When she saw the door knob move she immediately stood, running when she realized it was you. She jumped on you leaving you to drop your bottle of water to catch her.

“Happy to see you too baby,” you whisper in her ear. She responds by tightening her hold on you.

You laugh as you move to put her down, though she latches onto you still. She had an extremely bad feeling since this morning and it made her not want to let go of you.

You moved her to your side and wrapped one of your hands around her waist, while she kept both of her arms circled around yours.

You both walked over to where the rest were standing, Sophia moving so you can greet your parents and her members, and when you finished she went back to her previous spot by your side.

“You excited? Only two more races after this then you’re off,” your father asks.

You shake your head, “I’m more so nervous.” Sophia perks when she hears that.

“Why?” She feels you jump slightly at her intrusion, not expecting a voice to come from her direction.

“Just not used to the track and its turns yet.” Your dad comes beside you and pats the shoulder Sophia is not currently resting her head on.

“You did great during practice and quali, I mean you’re starting fifth.”

You nod your head at your dad’s words, “Yeah, it’s probably just preracing jitters.”

The room door opens again and in steps one of your team members. “Hey, Y/N, it’s time to get ready.”

“Alright.” You turn to your parents first, Sophia stepping away momentarily, but she stays near watching you. You hugged your dad first and then your mother, who pressed a quick kiss to your head. Each member wishes you luck, Yoonchae even showing you the sign she made you with Megan and Manon, which made you laugh and thank them.

Everyone in the room moves back to let you and Sophia say your goodbyes.

“Hey,” you say as you lift her head, “You okay? You’ve been very quiet.”

She tightens her grip slightly. “Just…anxious.”

You smiled at her to reassure her, when you still see the fear in her eyes you lean down and give her a peck. You feel her ease slightly, “Everything will be okay. I’m gonna win and then come back up here with the trophy and you and the girls can sign it.”

She nods, but you can still see the hesitation, “Baby-”

You're cut off by the staff coming back again, motioning that it’s seriously time to go. You sigh before looking back at Sophia.

“I have to go now, It’ll be over before you know it.” You kiss her once more and she tries to pull you closer, but you pull away much to her dismay.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” She makes sure to say back, the bad feeling in her is overwhelming at this point. And when you walk out with one final wave, she finds herself struggling not to cry.

“Hey, you good?” Manon asks her, concern clear in her voice. She nods and when she turns back she sees everyone else also looking at her with worry. A blush raises on her face due to embarrassment.

“Just nervous, that’s all.” Manon nods, she clearly doesn’t believe her but drops it for her sake.

Down in the garage you fasten your helmet, assuring that it's tight on your head before lowering yourself into your car. One of the engineers taps the top of the helmet and holds his thumb up and you respond by putting yours up too.

You feel them lift the car and begin to bring it to the grid.

You hear your team manager’s voice come alive on the radio in your helmet, “Y/N do you copy?”

“Yup, all clear.”

You and him check through everything ensuring the car is ready as your crew take care of the outside.

“Alright, the grid is clearing for formation lap, try to warm the tires as much as possible, they’re a little cold today.”

“Alright.” The grid clears and the formation lap starts, you feel the car stall at certain points, but your team manager assures you it’s nothing too serious, and it’ll go away during the race.

The lap ends and everyone takes their spots. The silence that falls over the grid before the start of a race is peaceful. You breathe in before bringing your hand to where your lips would be and press it against the number printed on your helmet, 31, representative of Sophia’s birthday.

As the lights lit up you held your breath, your heart pounding against your chest loudly, the hum of your car coursing through your body. And then the lights shut off.

Accidents weren’t an uncommon occurrence in Formula One, drivers crashed regularly. But none to this level.

It started off fine, you made the first turn perfectly fine, but when you went into the second your car stalled and you went straight into the wall. It would’ve been fine, if it wasn’t for the fire.

Sophia swears she’ll never get your mother’s screams out of her head. She feels the air get sucked out of her body as she falls to her knees, someone comes to her side almost immediately, and by the coldness of their hands she can tell it's Daniela.

She hears her saying something, but she can’t process them, all she can think about is the fact you’re still in that car. She watches as medical people try to get close, but the fire is even too hot for them, and Sophia doesn’t want to think about what that could mean for you.

Time seems to go slowly, though it’s probably only been fifteen seconds it feels like years as red flags go out on the track, an ambulance now racing onto the track.

Sobs fill the room as each second goes by, and Sophia thinks she’s going to throw up.

Until Lara yells.

It almost seems fake at first, a hand bursting out from flames, but then another follows. And suddenly you’re out of it, two medical personnels grabbing onto you as you shake your hands, others spraying you and the fire with some sort of chemical. You limp your way to the ambulance as cheers erupt from the circuit, but Sophia doesn’t pay them attention as she’s already running out of the room to somehow find you.

She hears Daniela call for her, but she doesn’t listen, her entire being is out of place and it’ll only be fixed if she sees you. But before she can run onto the track cold hands grab her, and she curses Daniela’s unbelievable stamina.

“Sophia-” Daniela cuts herself off when she sees the look on Sophia’s face. It’s clear to her instantly that Sophia isn’t mentally there with them anymore, she won’t stop repeating the same phrase between quick breaths, borderline hyperventilating.

“I need to see her.” She repeats for what must’ve been the hundredth time and Daniela knows she’ll probably repeat it until she sees you. She knew before she did anything else she needed to calm Sophia down, so she brought her into a hug.

Sophia tenses at first, and Daniela can’t help but compare her to a feral animal as she herself tenses for any reaction may come. But to her relief, Sophia sobs, the sounds of them breaking her heart.

“It’s okay, she’s okay.” Daniela repeats this phrase like a prayer as she rubs Sophia’s back. After a while Sophia finally calms enough to speak.

“I’m sorry.”

Daniela immediately shakes her head, “Don’t be. You alright?”

Sophia shakes her head, “No, but I will be when I see her.”

Daniela nods and pulls away from Sophia, her shirt now with a clear wet spot on it, but she doesn’t mention it as she grabs Sophia’s hand.

“Let’s go find out what hospital she’s in and go.” Sophia simply nods as they go back to the room. When they enter the members all rush to them, but when Manon sees how distraught Sophia is she pulls the others back, which Daniela thanks with a nod.

“Where are her parents,” Sophia asks once she finally gathers the courage to look up.

“They went to the hospital, they wanted to wait for you, but…” Lara naturally trails off and Sophia nods.

“Did they say which hospital?”

“Yeah,” Lara starts, “Mercy.”

Daniela pulls out her keys and lifts them up, “Let’s get going.”

They all go to Daniela’s car, Sophia sits in the front as the others squish in the back, none of them bothering to complain. Daniela puts the address on her phone and immediately takes off, her speed possibly comparable to one of a racer.

When they make it to the hospital Daniela barely gets to stop when Sophia jumps out, refusing to waste any more time away from you. Your dad seemed to have been waiting for her arrival as she barely even gets to the front desk when he calls for her.

“Where’s your members?” He asks. And on cue the other five come rushing in, racing to them immediately.

“Perfect, come on she’s on the fifth floor, they got her a room already.” The elevator ride is quiet aside from the dreadfully happy music and Sophia’s constant shuffling. When the door opens she has to remind herself she just can’t rush past your dad and she has to be patient, you having a room meant a good thing.

And it was as they got closer she could hear you and your mom arguing.

“I don’t want this cast!”

“You broke your ankle, it doesn’t matter what you want!”

And Sophia would have laughed if she wasn’t so tense, when they make their way inside your mother and you turn towards them, your eyes lighting up at the sight of her.

It quiets as everyone takes you in, no one moving. That is until Yoonchae runs and practically jumps on you.

“Yoonchae!” Manon yells going to pull her off of you, but you hold your non wrapped hand up. When Manon stops in her tracks you hug Yoonchae back and Sophia realizes that Yoonchae is crying.

You were close with all the members of Katseye, but it wasn’t a secret that outside of Sophia, Yoonchae was the one you were the closest with. Growing up as an only child you always wanted a sibling so when you met Yoonchae she naturally took that position.

She pulls away sniffling, “You scared me!”

You pout at her, as you use your hand to wipe away a tear. “I’m sorry.” She shakes her head before hugging you once more, this one more careful.

“Are you okay,” Megan asks, speaking for the first, and based on the fear lacing her voice Sophia can tell she wasn’t silent by choice.

“Yup, just some minor burns on my fingers, sprained wrist, a broken ankle and probably a ton of bruises.” You finish your list off with a laugh, but quickly silence yourself when no one else does.

“Geez, it’s like someone died.” You thought you had muttered it low enough that no one could hear you, but the slap on your thigh from your mother tells you otherwise.

“Don’t joke like that.”

You raise both hands in surrender before turning your stare to your girlfriend who looks like she’s about to break down.

“Hey guys can you give me and Sophia a couple minutes?” The question causes everyone to stare at the girl and at the way she looks they all agree. When the door closes you try to sit up, wincing slightly from a not yet formed bruise.

At the sight of you in pain Sophia immediately rushes to your side, “Are you okay?”

You nod before pulling her to you. The slight force of being pulled causes her to sit on the edge of your bed as you hug her.

You can feel her trying to pull away and tighten your hold. After a couple more failed attempts she gives up and lets you hold her. She closes her eyes as she listens to your heartbeat, her body calming more and more with each beat.

Tears begin to well up in her eyes as the thought of almost never experiencing your warmth again crosses her mind.

When the first drop hits your hospital gown you look down at her.

“Baby…”

And the dam breaks.

Her sobs break your heart, pain coursing through you as she pulls on your shirt when she clenches it in her hands, but you don’t mind. You place kisses on her head until she calms down and then tell her to look at you.

When she does, you offer her a smile, “Hi beautiful.” You laugh at the blush that rushes to her cheeks, placing a small kiss on one of them.

You let her calm down before speaking once more, “Feeling better?”

She nods slightly, because truthfully she does feel better, but fear still courses through her veins. “I almost lost you today.”

You hum as you rake your fingers through her hair, the feeling of it light due to the numbness of your fingers. You inhale the scent of lavender as you close your eyes, a bright orange slowly fills in the blackness and your eyes shoot open once more. The quickening of your heart causes Sophia to pull away to look away.

“I’m okay,” you quickly say. Before she can question the hospital door opens.

“Sorry, just the doctor here.” You nod at Lara and Sophia stands. The rest of them walk in with the doctor following right behind.

The doctor goes through her regular checkup, when she finishes she turns and jumps when she is met with everyone staring at her expectantly.

She clears her throat. “Right, Y/N seems to be well given everything. We are going to keep her overnight for observation, but other than the obvious, she will be perfectly good to go home tomorrow.”

The doctor jumps once more as the group, sans Sophia, exclaims. When she leaves the girls all take turns writing on your cast with a couple of pens your mother found in her purse. The hospital room becomes even more livelier when your teammate Oscar shows up. Though loud it puts your mind to ease.

They all stay until visitor hours end, the nurse revealing only one person was allowed to stay with you. Your mother and Sophia argued about who should stay, both believing the other should.

Your mother ultimately wins by stating she has to use the hotel room she paid for. You both know it’s a lie, you have never made your parents pay for a hotel for any of the races they have attended, but before either of you can tell her that she pulls your father out the room and leaves.

Sophia stands to the side as a nurse readies the cot for her and does a final check on you. When she walks out you call Sophia’s name, when she’s close enough you pull her into the space you made when she wasn’t looking.

She freezes at first, but before she can move you speak. “Don’t move, just let me hold you.” You can tell she’s hesitant, but after a few moments she laxes in your hold.

A silence falls between you two, her listening to your breathing and you enjoying the heat from her skin.

“You know,” you start, “There was a moment in there I thought I wouldn’t make it.” You pause for a second to take a breath and her grip on you tightens.

“I felt the heat, and saw how it was all around me and I just accepted it. I closed my eyes and thought ‘Well, at least I had a good life.’ But then I heard the noise of Mario Kart.”

You both laugh at the absurdity of it, and you close your eyes to take in the sound of hers, you always loved how it sounded. When she calms you continue.

“As crazy as it sounds, it was that sound that brought me back to being with you, and of course your members. But the thought of leaving you, of possibly not being by your side anymore immediately made me want to fight to live.”

You look down to find her looking at you which causes you to smile, though you’re not sure she sees it due to the darkness, but you don’t mind as you bring your hand up to her face and caress it.

“I tell you this because I want you to know how much I love you. You are my world, Soph. As long as you’ll have me I’ll never leave your side.” She doesn’t respond as she pulls you into a kiss, it’s a bit of a mess due to both of your limited views, but it doesn’t bother either of you.

She pulls away, but you peck her lips once more and lean your forehead on hers.

“I love you,” she whispers, “Don’t ever leave me.”

“I won’t, I promise.”

And you meant it, you would always be by her side.

[ghouljams]

hi ghoul i have a question of the sex-ed variety sorry for rambling: why do you think performing oral sex is so villainized / demonized in conversation? we live in the most modern of times where casual approaches to sex seem so commonplace and ppl are more willing to talk abt things they enjoy etc. Receiving oral sex seems all the rage in popculture mentions etc but there still seems to be so much stigma/judgement about everyday convos re: performing it? i’m so confused when imo one cant exist w/o the other? ive heard ppl say its a lack of selfrespect thing for those afab or for those amab its not manly to do. which seems like an oversimplification but as an abstinent, religious-trauma virgin idk if i have the range to see all sides of the convo lmao

So this is going to be mostly personal opinion since I can't speak to this on a scientific or sociological level.

I think there's a massive disconnect culturally between pleasure for yourself and pleasure for others that stems from what you could call "radical individualism." There's this mentality of "I want to get mine, I don't care if you get yours" that a lot of people have and it can bleed into sexual conversations as well. So that's one part of it: the idea that getting something for yourself is good, but why would you go out of your way to help others?

Then another part, which I've talked about before, is the disgust around male bodies. This is a lot to do with the way terf politics and exclusionary "feminism" has seeped into common culture. There is a recent and evolving idea that vagina=good and penis=bad, that I think a lot of afab people are beginning to fall into because it feels retaliatory. All your life you're told that you're lesser for having a vagina and suddenly you're allowed to say that the opposite is true! It feels liberating, but it's a trap.

I see this in queer circles as well. Bisexual women will talk about being "unfortunately" into men, or they'll be accused of faking their attraction to women because of their attraction to me. People will talk loudly about how gross men are and how they hate men and how they think being attracted to men is a moral failing. So we begin to associate amab bodies with disgust. Penis=bad, right? So then attraction to penis=bad too, right?

Then we get into pop culture. Women in media are still very much centered as being forced or coerced into alternative forms of sex. We hear jokes about anal on birthdays, about having to convince your girlfriend to give you a blowjob, about various non-missionary positions being reserved for special occasions, and all of them center the amab person as undesireable. They focus on afab people not enjoying things that their amab partner does. And the implication often is that because the afab person doesn't get any sexual gratification out of this they must not want to do it. After all, men don't get any sexual gratification out of giving oral, so why should women?

(that's a lie of course, plenty of people --I would say most people-- enjoy giving their partner oral, but you understand the hyperbole here.)

So. Why can we enjoy receiving oral, but we can't enjoy giving it? Because we have been told we aren't supposed to. Sex is framed as a grand sacrifice that afab people make for their amab partner. Oral is something that media says no one enjoys giving. People talk about enjoying oral in terms of oral fixations and kink and "oh you only like that because of your deviance" seems to be the message that gets thrown out when someone mentions it. Biting has become more socially acceptable than sucking dick. The idea that people want to hurt their partner, is more socially acceptable than bringing them pleasure.

Just sit with that for a second because I have to.

You're absolutely right, there can't be one without the other, you can't receive oral without your partner giving it. I struggle with this A LOT and Mr. Ghoul is a saint for working with me on it, but I feel guilty asking for oral, like I'm forcing my partner to do something they don't enjoy. Despite being told by my partner that he likes eating me out, despite the fact that I like blowing him, it's hard for me as an afab person to accept that my partner enjoys pleasuring me. I've never been told that's an option.

While I think there's a lot that we as a society need to unpack in terms of sexuality and sexual expression, I think this movement of "I don't pleasure my partner, my partner pleasures me" is going to lead to a lot of unhappy relationships. A very small but loud group of men says they don't care about making their partner come, the general population does, but as it often happens shitty people focus on shitty people.

I don't want this to devolve into Ghoul talking about terf-cult politics and the way they love alt-right men's movements, so I'll leave it there, but those are my thoughts on it.

[vicedmuses]

i think i want you as much as you want me. even though clayton had a healthy ego and knew that people would be lucky to get a chance with him, it was nice to hear that this wasn't just about giving the man a job or paying him a higher sum of money. they both seemed to like each other. before, he didn't have any ground to stand on when making up the younger man's part of the conversation. now? now he had all of the confirmation that he needed. he barely stayed in monogamous relationships, but that wasn't because he didn't like them. he just never sought them out and no one tried to make a stable man out of him. so when his shirt was fully unbuttoned and he was able to show off more of himself, he smiled softly. “good, because i plan to turn you on as much as humanly possible. every second i can make your cock hard or your hole clench just thinking about me or listening to me is a second that i'm a winner.” he wrapped his arms around caius' waist. not only to support him, but also because he just liked being close to him. skin to skin. touching any way possible. “i don't just like you because you gave me the best blowjob of my life by the way.” that part was true. he liked that the man didn't stop when he wanted something. that determination was admirable and not something that everyone had. “so i think i'd like that. although i hope you know, if i'm going to be sleeping with you weekly i'm not going to just seek you out for sex. i'm going to take you out to shows, dinner, and everything else you can imagine when someone is being courted.” he returned the kiss slowly. something that almost seemed innocent if you didn't know what the two had gotten up to earlier and why they were here now. then, when he felt that delicious tongue sneak its way into his mouth, he couldn't hold back anymore. clayton started to suck on his tongue lightly, not putting too much force behind it. he moaned a little at the taste and the fact that the two of them seemed to be losing themselves in the deep kiss. his shaft throbbed, bulge growing even more, as he heard the moans come from the man's mouth. only one of the many reasons that he found him to be quite attractive. he didn't know how he was going to manage to pull himself away from him. he was starting to get so used to just kissing him. 

honestly, someone could have told him that kiss lasted ten minutes and he would have believed it. time moved different with caius. he liked it. “kissing's a two way street. only that good because i have such a good partner to do it with.” he winked at the man as more of his clothing was taken off. he watched careful at how it was placed in a neat pile on the chair. good to know that he was at least going to be taken care of while he was here. since he wasn't planning on leaving right after they finish their session together. “if you're sure. i can think of a couple of ways to fill you up anyway.” he smirked slightly after hearing the curse. clayton even gave him a little show, flexing his muscles when it came time for his biceps to be touched. he worked hard on his body, so when it came time to show it off he wasn't going to be the type to back away from it. “trust me, i'm going to use you up as i see fit, but i want to make sure that you can still enjoy yourself too. do you have any plans for the weekend? after i'm done with you, i was planning on taking you to a spa. i already made some reservations for sunday morning. that way your body can be fully relaxed for monday and you won't have to worry about anything.” once again, it was a part of him taking care of his partners when he actually did have them. “if you've seen the things i'd smoke, you'd know that this is more than alright with me. i have some back home too, so it's not like i'm against it.” to show his case a little more, he took the joint and took in a deep inhale before releasing the puff. then, he did it a second time, but a little different. that time, he breathed the smoke into caius' mouth while kissing him deeply. with the joint still in his mouth, he made sure to slowly remove the man's shirt. also putting it in the same pile as his. he wanted to make sure that he smelled like him by the end of this. then, clayton returned the joint to the rightful owner and stepped back. “you're not going to have to do anything else tonight.” he slowly took off his pants, making sure to stand in a place where caius could see a hint of cock, but also the curve of his ass. then, when all of his clothes were in a pile, he went back and got down on his knees in front of caius. he hooked his fingers onto the waistband of his sweatpants, slowly pulling them down. at the same time, clay would kiss along his thighs and legs. then, he repeated those motions until both of them were naked. he grabbed his new employee by his legs, slowly lifting them up. “smoke away baby, i'm going to eat you out like you've never been eaten out before.” 

All the things Clayton was saying eased every and any worry he had; he was quick to come around, to acknowledge that perhaps the rough and tough demeanor the man had in appearance was qualmed by his gentle nature. He was surprised surprised (and pleased) to see just how intimate and passionate the man was, by the way he was administering kisses to his lips and face. It made him pause for a second, just as he undid the last button of the man's shirt, tugging it free from where it had been tucked into his pants, freeing up the space to unveil his torso. Caius was sure to feast his eyes upon it soon, but for now, he maintained eye contact as the man spoke on, reassuring him in that calm, deep tone of voice. "Wow," he chuckled, a grin on his face. "I have to confess, the more you speak, the more turned on I get." That, and the attraction was practically palpable. If this was any other situation, he would be asking the man out on a real date... even if Caius had never actually been on one. Most of his encounters were for sex for monetary gain or something born out of passion. "I just want you to know... you don't have to pay me to get a chance at my ass. At this point, I think I want you as much as you want me." Caius stood on the tips of his toes, standing tall so he could wrap his arms around the man's shoulders, a hand finds the back of Clayton's head, Caius' body (though bulky) is slender as he stretched his back in order to lift himself upward, since the two were of relative height. "If after tonight you enjoy being inside of me, and you decide I'm a worthy fuck, perhaps we should arrange for this to be a weekly thing." Playfully, he wiggled his brows at the man, his features softening as he leaned in, their bodies aligning together as Caius stole a sweet, chaste kiss from his plump lips. This kiss was more sincere, more intimate, tender. He latched onto the upper lip, his mouth opened lightly to enable his tongue to sneak out in order to joyfully toy with its newest partner. Every now and then, a soft moan and a whimper would escape his lips. Kissing was not something he did, especially with past partners and hook-ups, since it was deemed a very intimate gesture. So as he stood there, the kiss being reciprocated with a man so attractive, wealthy and well-endowed, Caius was a vocal mess.

Eventually, the kiss broke away. The result causing his cock to throb as it pressed against Clayton's own bulge. "Sweet Jesus, you're a fuckin' good kisser, Boss." Caius' face was plastered with a sincere smile. His feet set back down on the cement floor of his loft apartment, hands returning to the front to sweep between layers of clothing to caress over the wide expansion of Clayton's chest. "I don't think I'm all that hungry now, I can eat later." He hummed, eyes glancing down at the nature of that strong chest, pert nipples, delectable abs. Caius helped to rid the man of every garment of clothing from his torso, until he stood there in just his pants. Usually, he would carelessly throw things aside, but noticing just how expensive and pristine his suits were, he decided to dress them over a nearby chair. Upon returning, he didn't shy away from taking both hands to test the might and dexterity of the man's biceps. "Hm, fuck." And then simply, he allowed his hand graze along his stomach, his touch a sweet caress along supple flesh. "While I may not be the most skilled bottom you've ever met, don't feel like you have to be too careful with me. Yes, maybe not in the first hour, but... I want you to fuck me like you want to. Don't worry about me, Boss. I know I'm going to struggle to sit and walk after tonight, but I'm glad I have this entire weekend to heal myself up for my first day on the job on Monday." By another quick press to his lips, his left hand latched itself onto the belt buckle at the centre front of the man's hips, guiding him backwards into the living room area, where the stench of marijuana was a lot more noticeable. "Ah, sorry about the blunt. Was settling my nerves a bit." The entire joint was still unsmoked, Caius only having taken a few puffs of it before Clayton knocked upon his door. He reached down, took it between his thumb and pointer finger and took a drag of it. "This alright with you?" He wasn't sure where Clayton stood on smoking, so he offered it out to him as he sat down, "You want a hit of this?" Caius leaned back into the sofa, the size and heft of his cock visible in his sweatpants, his gaze turning down to the volume of the man's groin; he knew from his earlier experience, Clayton wasn't yet fully erect. "If you'd prefer, I wouldn't mind laying back, smoking it, and watch you unravel your prize." Meaning, Caius was still pretty much fully clothed, and he ached to be naked, so long as Clayton was just as exposed to his eyes as well. "But before you do, I need to see you. All of you. Please."

[cluescorner]

Arlecchino's whole deal is unbelievable

Arlecchino: Huh I wonder what's causing my weird powers? I can't really worry about that right now tho, I've gotta become King and then kill my "Mother".

*Kills Clervie and "Mother"*

Arlecchino: Huh I wonder why I was able to defeat a Fatui Harbinger when I'm like 17 or so? I can't really worry about that right now tho, I've gotta be in jail and become a Harbinger.

*Is in jail for a while and becomes a Harbinger*

Arlecchino: Huh I wonder why I am-

Pierro: Hey what's up hello, anyways you're descended from the Crimson Moon Dynasty of Khaenri'ah. I'm sure that this is a lot for you to take in so-

Arlecchino: Ok.

Pierro: ...You're just cool with that?

Arlecchino: IDK maybe? I can't really worry about that at the moment, I'm a father now. This orphanage full of children I love (who also are child soldiers and are not allowed to leave or else I'll execute them except maybe now I'm just gonna wipe their memories IDK I'm morally complex) isn't gonna run itself.

*Runs the orphanage/spy recruitment initiative*

Me, the fucking player: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ARE KHAENRI'AN? WHY WASN'T THIS BROUGHT UP IN YOUR FUCKING QUEST?? OR ANYTHING ELSE????

Arlecchino, talking to me through my phone: I honestly don't know why you care, I'm too busy to give a shit. Anyways, I'm gonna go fight fate itself I guess. I'm sure that I don't share any thematic parallels with any other Khaenri'an characters (particularly as it relates to acting and family angst) and that I haven't made the idea of 'curses' on Khaenri'ans and what they entail even more complicated than they already were. See ya.

[jrueships]

sometimes i'll think abt a Fandom and wish it were bigger, and sometimes i'll read something from a fandom.. and wish it were smaller

[sonknuxadow]

they werent lying that knuckles series barely has knuckles in it

[mrfoox]

I'm... I want people to be as into me as I am into them. I want to spend time with people all the time, I want someone to want the same from me

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[none-tadashi-left-hiro]

can you guys all please actually actually be so kind to each other and I mean it tangibly like stop being a coward about what you’ll lose cause it doesn’t fucking matter more than being kind and you know it just fucking do what you can we’ve already lost so much what is the fucking cost of being kind to you anymore. people are so fucking desensitized to their own bullshit they’re dealing with like they’re so casual and blaise and ignorant about things that even harm them directly like why not at least be kind about it why not at least deal with the bullshit that comes from being kind instead i am so sad abt this why do people have to make it so hard. like I get capitalism and colonialism and whatever plays into people being raised to be unkind but are we that fucking fallible like that really fucking sucks bro

[the-midnight-in-me]

.

[lemonlover1110]

𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑

Sukuna

Pairing: Trueform!Sukuna x f!Reader

Summary: Your husband was an heir, and you have to fulfill the order.

Warnings: MDNI, smut, vaginal fingering, anal fingering, oral sex (f. receiving), spitting, slight use of tummy mouth, double penetration, tit sucking (and biting), breeding kink, degrading, sukuna is... sukuna but fluffier to his wife

*he's been on my mind lately and I'm going insane

10k Event Masterlist

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

“I want an heir.” Sukuna brings up one fateful night as you walk over to lay down beside him. It’s not a request, it’s an order that you must fulfill, just like everything that involves Sukuna. Strangely enough, Sukuna has been the one that’s been delaying having a child since you’ve been nearly begging him to have a baby with him for the past year. It seems he’s finally given in to the idea though.

“What was that, Suku?” You ask, stopping in your tracks because he’s caught you off guard. He stands up from where he lays, towering over you. You look up at him, waiting for him to repeat himself but you should know better than anyone that your husband doesn’t like to repeat himself. But this time he does,

“It’s about time you give me an heir.” Which makes a smile spread across your face because it’s what you’ve been wanting. Sukuna has been the one that has been refusing to have a child so you don’t understand why he words it like that– But either way, you’re happy and ready to fulfill his every need. Before you can even agree to his order, his bottom hands are undoing your robe to get you undressed while his mouth goes down to your lips.

Sukuna has grown accustomed to kissing you, and handling your body more gently since you’ve asked him to. Compared to the beginning, he treats you like a petal. You like to think it’s his way of expressing his love for you since he’s not very vocal about it, and you know he doesn’t particularly enjoy kissing. His tongue meets yours while his hands try to undo the robe without tearing the fabric into pieces since he knows it’s one of your favorites.

He bites down on your lip causing a cry to leave your throat while he gives up on properly taking off your robe. You hear as the fabric rips, and maybe another time you would be upset about it but you’re too consumed by him to care. He’ll just get you another one. His two lower hands roam down your bare body. One hand gropes your breasts, his rough fingers pinching your nipples. He gets to your cunt, lightly slapping it before he runs two fingers through your cunt.

He pulls away from the kiss, letting your soft moans into the air when he begins to play with your clit. Sex for him has always been a selfish act but ever since his first night with you, he’s found pleasure in pleasing you. The sound of your moans in the air while he toys with you is the sweetest melody. He found it dumb at first, but now there are nights where he’s simply buried between your thighs with the purpose of making you come as much as he can. 

Sukuna picks you up and puts you down on the bed. Taking a moment to appreciate how beautiful his wife looks when she’s under him. Fuck, you’re so fucking small compared to him. It’s nothing new, really, all the people that Sukuna has been with are miniscule compared to him. But he just loves the way that you look under him since he’s never seen a more beautiful human being. He’d never tell that to you though.

Sukune begins to tease your entrance, threatening to push a finger into your cunt but he doesn’t. He runs his fingers through your folds, while his thumb plays with your clit. He lowers his head, his tongue circling your nipple before his mouth wraps around it and he begins to suck.

“Can you put a finger in, Suku? Please…” You ask him, your needy cunt in need of his fingers inside of you. He bites down on your nipple, causing a cry to leave your lips before he unlatches and lifts his head up. 

“I hate beggars.” Sukuna reminds you, and you’re about to apologize but he shoves three fingers into your mouth, gagging you with them before you can even get a word out. He really knows you better than anyone. “My woman doesn’t apologize to anyone either. Not even her own husband.”

Sukuna finally pushes two fingers inside your pussy, making your eyes roll to the back of your head. His fingers are just so fucking big, and they reach every right spot. Sukuna feels you moan around his fingers before he takes them out of your mouth. He curves the fingers inside your cunt so they hit against your sweet spot. One hand goes to your breasts, and he begins to play with your nipples. 

“It feels so good, Suku.” You moan, your back arching as pleasure consumes you. Sukuna’s multiple hands are… Everything.

He takes his fingers out of your cunt, moving the wet digits down to your asshole. He spits down on your cunt and spreads his saliva down. He presses his fingers against your asshole as he lowers his head. He kisses from your lower abdomen to your pussy, where his tongue then runs through your folds and then up to your clit. His tongue begins to flick your clit while he pushes two fingers into your asshole, making you moan loudly.

“Fuck– Fuck!” You yell, as Sukuna also pushes two fingers into your cunt again. It’s like music to Sukuna’s ears. It’s too much for you, two fingers in your ass, two in your pussy, and his tongue on your clit. Both holes squeeze around his fingers as his tongue lays flat on your clit.

“Sukuna! Shit, it’s so fucking good.” You bite down your lip, trying to not bring too much attention to yourself. Unluckily for you, as soon as Sukuna knows that you’re making yourself quiet, he stops. He lifts his head up and takes his fingers out of your pussy and asshole, leaving your holes to clench around nothing.

“I want my woman to be loud. Don’t be a fucking bitch, do you hear me?” Sukuna kneels, towering over you again and you nod in response. You use your forearm to hold yourself up and look at him. He undoes his robe, and you lick your lips as you watch your husband get completely naked. Your thighs come together as your eyes fall on his two thick cocks, feeling excitement consume you. Sukuna smirks, watching you prompt yourself up to get his cocks in your mouth. He stops you, his hand going on your chin. “You’re a cute little bitch… You’ll be okay. You can handle them both, right?”

“Yes, lord.” You nod in response, and Sukuna treats you as if you were a doll– More gently than he would treat an actual doll but he moves you as if you were one. He forces you to hold your legs to your chest, and the large tongue on his mouth licks your pussy, and moves down to your asshole. He’ll be sweet with you, especially since you brought back the name that you hadn’t used since your marriage.

The tongue teases the entrance of your asshole but Sukuna stops before anything else happens. He lays his cocks down on your lower abdomen, and you deeply inhale. You wonder how it’ll fit inside of you, but it always fits so you shouldn’t worry.

Sukuna doesn’t bother teasing the cock that goes in your pussy, immediately pushing it in which causes a loud moan to leave your lips. He doesn’t waste time in putting the second cock in your ass, and once you’re stuffed with him, he begins to move. He’s gentler with his thrusts this time, which you certainly appreciate since he didn’t give you time to adjust. 

He’s grown impatient with the idea of you giving him an heir, he can’t waste anymore time. And fuck, he just needs to feel you wrapped around his cocks. You don’t seem to be struggling either way, quite the opposite, you moan in pleasure with his every movement.

“I’m going to fill your womb up with my seed, and you’re going to give me what I deserve.” Sukuna says through gritted teeth to not let out another sound that hints at how good you’re making him feel. Sukuna will never say anything that could hint at him being happy with someone else– The most you’ve ever gotten from him was a marriage… order. Sukuna didn’t propose marriage, he simply told you that you two would be getting married. But you know that the face that he’s making and the way he talks, he’s feeling good. 

“I’ll give you what you want, lord.” You respond as his cocks hits every right spot, filling you with so much pleasure. His thrusts pick up speed, and your eyes begin to roll to the back of your head. Sukuna’s hand begins to play with your clit, and you begin to squeeze around him even more, causing him to hiss. Fuck, he can’t wait to see you big and round with his child. Sukuna can’t wait for his seed to bless your womb and all the changes that it’ll bring to your body. He can’t wait to steal some of the milk that’s meant for his child.

“Going to fill you up with my child.” Sukuna groans as you squeeze around his cocks. It’s too much for you, especially after he’s worked you up. You’re loudly moaning his name, just like he wants you to. He wants the servants to hear how he pleases his woman. It’s all too much for you since he’s filling up both of your holes and toying with your clit.

You shut your eyes, and see white as you squirt all over him, causing a chuckle to leave his throat. He lightly slaps your clit as you make a mess all over him. Sukuna can’t help but praise you for it, which is definitely something rare, “That’s my good wife.”

Sukuna bites his tongue, loving how tight and warm your holes feel. But you won’t get a noise out of him. His hand goes to your throat, however, it just rests there while his thumb presses against your lips, “The only woman worthy of carrying my child.”

Sukuna gets rougher with his thrusts as his release approaches. The thought of you carrying his baby makes him go insane. He’ll make sure it happens soon, he’ll fuck you every night until there’s confirmation that you’re expecting his successor. 

He mutters your name before he fills you up with his cum. He doesn’t dare to pull out until both of your holes are completely filled with his seed. When Sukuna pulls out, he lays down beside you. He brings you into his embrace while you take deep breaths.

Sukuna kisses the top of your head, one of his hands running up and down your back. Maybe Sukuna hasn’t exactly been fond of kissing before, but it’s definitely his favorite thing to do with you now.

[aliyahwritings]

ARE YOU JEALOUS?

Summary: Sassy!Kook!Reader gets jealous when she sees Rafe Cameron close with another girl...

Content: neck sucking (?), childhood friends to lovers, kind of mean!rafe in one scene, bullying lol, suggestive towards the end but just a tiny bit.

Words Count: 5.5k ... i don't know what the fuck happened...

Aliyah's talking: IDK if i fw this or not but i hope yall will lolz <3 Thank you so much for the love on Protective Instincts btw!!!! I am so grateful and surprised that many of you all enjoyed it. Hope u'll enjoy this one too 🩷

Sunlight streamed into Sarah’s room, casting a soft, golden glow over the space as you lounged on her bed, idly flipping through a magazine. You both were sprawled across the plush, yellow covers, surrounded by half-empty bags of chips and scattered makeup palettes—evidence of an afternoon well spent. Sarah was perched by the vanity, trying on different lip glosses, all of which looked beautiful on her, but she insisted on which one was the best.

“So, tell me again,” she started, holding up a tube of shimmery pink gloss and squinting at it thoughtfully. “Why don’t you go for Jake? I mean, he’s cute, he’s smart—”

“And boring. He is boring,” you interjected, rolling your eyes with a laugh. “Come on, Sarah, you know how I am. I need someone with a little more… edge…? Someone that could handle me but also play the game, you know?”

Sarah smirked, setting the lip gloss down and turning to face you. “Edge… Handling your attitude… I’m afraid that weirdly sounds like someone we both know.”

“You think you’re so funny, huh?” you said, shooting her a mock glare.

She laughed, completely unbothered. "What? I’m just stating the facts!" She shrugged, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "As much as I hate to admit it, my brother definitely fits both criteria, so…”

You were listening to her but stopped when your phone buzzed. Out of habit, you unlocked it and opened the notification from Instagram; Topper posted a new story and you watched it. The screen was filled with a shaky video of the beach, the late afternoon sun casting golden light over everything. You recognized some people, but your attention zeroed in on Rafe, right in the center of it all. He was grinning, his arm slung around a girl who was laughing and pulling him closer, like they were the only two people on the beach. 

You felt a quick, unwelcome pang in your chest.

“Hey, what’s got you so interested?” Sarah’s voice broke through your thoughts, and you glanced back at her, masking any hint of emotion with a casual smirk.

You locked the screen and tossed the phone aside. “Nothing. Just Topper’s beach parties and Instagram stories.”

She gave you a skeptical look, folding her arms. “Don’t lie to me. I know you better than yourself, what did you see in that story, Y/N?”

You hesitated, but then shrugged, trying to play it off. “Rafe was at the party with some girl. A new girl. It’s not a big deal.”

“Ah, I see,” she said with a raised eyebrow. “You know he’s always messing around with someone new. But… I thought you didn’t care about what he was up to.”

“I don’t,” you said, a bit too quickly, crossing your arms. “He can do whatever the hell he wants.”

“Right. So, you don’t care at all?”

You rolled your eyes, trying to suppress a smile. “Look, I just don’t get what’s so special about him that girls keep falling over themselves to be around him. That’s all.”

She nodded with a giggle. “Yeah, no, I definitely—”

“And doesn’t it bother anyone that he’s got a new girl every week? I mean, if I were one of those girls who actually liked him, I’d be furious. Wouldn’t you, Sar?” You barely paused before continuing, not even waiting for her answer. “It’s honestly just sad because Rafe really isn’t even all that. Sure, he can be fun and nice sometimes, but he’s also a huge asshole with a big fucking ego. Is it just me, or is everyone blind to that?”

Sarah was quiet for a moment, studying you with a thoughtful expression before she finally spoke up. “You know what? I think we could both use a break from overthinking anything about the opposite sex. How about we get out of here and grab some smoothies? I heard there’s a new spot by the marina.”

You nodded, grateful that she didn’t talk about your little moment. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Sarah grabbed her bag, giving you one last teasing smile. “Smoothies and maybe some retail therapy afterward?”

“Sounds like a plan,” you replied, letting the idea of a carefree afternoon replace the lingering thoughts of Rafe. Whatever he was up to, it was his business. You weren’t about to let it ruin your day.

The soft hum of the fridge and the rhythmic clinking of silverware filled the kitchen as you, Sarah, and Rafe gathered around the island, your weekly routine as ingrained as the family photos lining the walls. The night was settling in, casting a cozy stillness over the room. You were only half-listening as Sarah rambled on about her weekend plans, your attention instead focused on pushing pasta around on your plate, not particularly hungry.

Rafe sat across the counter, leaning back in his chair with an ease that always seemed to irritate you. He had been quiet, too but you knew he wouldn’t last long. Sure enough, he broke the silence.

“Alright,” he began, raising an eyebrow at you, “what’s up with you tonight? You’re awfully quiet.”

You didn’t look up, keeping your tone purposefully casual. “Nothing’s up,” you replied, hoping he’d let it go. But you knew better.

“Come on,” he pressed, tilting his head in that infuriatingly smug way. “Where’s that feisty attitude you always have? Usually, by now, you’d have already made at least five smartass comments about my shirt or something.”

You let out a short, unimpressed laugh, finally meeting his gaze with a raised eyebrow. “Maybe I just ran out of things to say about you, Rafael. Ever think of that?”

He grinned, his eyes glinting with mischief. “Nah. You’ve got an endless supply of attitude, Y/N. I’d be shocked if you were ever actually out of material.” He took a sip from his glass, watching you over the rim with that familiar, infuriating smirk.

Sarah shot you a look, her mouth twisted in a tired smile as she mouthed, here we go. She had seen this routine a thousand times before.

“You really think I spend that much time thinking about you?” you fired back, folding your arms over your chest and fixing him with an unimpressed stare.

“Oh, I don’t think,” he replied smoothly, leaning in a little closer, “I know. Admit it. I’m in your head, aren’t I?”

You let out an exaggerated sigh, leaning back in your chair as you tossed him an indifferent look. “Right. You’re the center of my world, Rafe. Can’t you tell?”

He chuckled, clearly enjoying this. “You know, when you’re this quiet, it’s like a fucking flashing neon sign saying, ‘Something’s up’. Might as well tell me now.”

You rolled your eyes. You knew that engaging with him like this was a slippery slope—once you started, he never let up. But for some reason, tonight, you couldn’t help yourself.

“Honestly, I don’t have the energy for your little mind games tonight,” you said, trying to sound as bored as possible. “So, if you’re expecting me to entertain you, you’re gonna be disappointed.”

“Oh, come on. I don’t believe that for a second,” he shot back, leaning back casually in his chair as if he had all the time in the world to wear you down. “You love this. Sparring with me? It’s basically your favorite hobby.”

You scoffed, shaking your head. "Didn’t realize my silence was such a tragedy for you.”

“Oh, it is. I mean, where else am I supposed to get my daily dose of attitude?” He leaned back, feigning a pout. “Come on, you’re no fun like this. Did something happen?”

You rolled your eyes, twirling your fork in the pasta as if it held your entire focus. “Why would you care? I’m sure you have more important things to worry about. Maybe more girl—”

Sarah let out a sigh, interrupting before Rafe could respond. “Honestly, do you two ever get tired of this? We’re supposed to be having dinner, and it feels like I’m watching some sort of weird rom-com.”

You shot Sarah an exasperated look. “There’s nothing romantic about this, Sar. It’s called surviving.”

“Right,” Sarah said, clearly unconvinced. “But could you maybe survive without the constant bickering? Just once?”

Rafe smirked, clearly unfazed by Sarah’s comment as he turned back to you. “I don’t know. I think she secretly enjoys it. You should see how she lights up when she gets going.”

“Fuck off,” you muttered, taking a long sip from your glass and hoping it would mask the heat you could feel rising in your cheeks.

He watched you with an amused glint in his eye, clearly picking up on your discomfort. “A little defensive, aren’t we? I mean, I’m just stating the obvious here. You’ve been on edge all night. Care to share with the class what’s really bothering you?”

You set your glass down with a little more force than necessary, fixing him with a glare. “You really think everything’s about you, don’t you?”

“Not everything,” he replied, shrugging casually. “Just the things that involve you. Because, for some reason, every time you’re in a mood, it usually has something to do with me.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but then closed it again, unsure of how to respond without giving anything away. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’d hit a nerve, even if he had.

“What’s the matter, princess?” he continued, pushing his plate aside as he leaned forward, his eyes never leaving yours. “Did something happen between you and Jake, huh? I thought you two were casually talk—”

You groaned, frustrated that he’d brought Jake into it. “There’s nothing to say about Jake. I’m just tired, okay? Not everything has to be about some guy.”

“Oh, I’m aware,” Rafe replied, his tone laced with a hint of smugness. “But I’d say you’re a little more…on edge than usual. So, it has to be about that guy, right…”

“Jake’s got nothing to do with this,” you said, your tone steady. “Unlike you, he actually knows how to mind his own business.”

Well, you’re just lying because you’ve never taken the time to actually learn about Jake and what type of person he was. As bitchy as it sounded, you were using him as a distraction.

You stared at him, hoping your silence would be enough to make him drop it. But, of course, he didn’t.

Rafe crossed his arms as he studied you, his gaze never wavering. “So, you’re saying you prefer a guy who lets you get away with whatever you want, then?”

You scoffed. “No, Rafe. I am saying I prefer a guy who doesn’t feel the need to stick his nose into everything I do. You know, a guy who’s secure enough to let me be without constantly needing to provoke me.”

“Yeah, I see,” he replied, nodding softly. “So, basically, you’re looking for someone boring. Someone who doesn’t challenge you, who just lets you coast by. Am I right?”

You let out a dry laugh, shaking your head. “You think you know me so well, don’t you? Don’t flatter yourself, Cameron. I can find someone else to annoy me if I really wanted to.”

Rafe’s eyes darkened, but that infuriating smirk stayed in place, like he thrived on every bit of tension between you. He cocked an eyebrow, leaning forward, his voice a low, taunting whisper. “Oh yeah? Who, exactly? Jake? He’s perfect for you—goody-two-shoes, never steps out of the fucking line. Because, let’s be honest, you’d crush him. He’d never call you out, never push you.” He paused, and there was a bitterness beneath his words, hidden but unmistakable. “He’d be safe.”

A bitter smile twisted your lips, the pain creeping into your voice despite your best efforts. “At least Jake knows how to be respectful. He wouldn’t stoop to tearing me down just to get a rise. He wouldn’t need to.”

Rafe scoffed, his amusement tinged with a hint of anger. “Respectful? Fuck that. You want someone to play nice and tell you what you want to hear, go right ahead. But I think we both know that’s not what you really want.” He took a step closer, his gaze fierce, challenging. “You think I’m the bad guy because I’m not afraid to tell you the truth. I don’t play pretend. I’m not here to tell you sweet lies—I’d rather see who you really are, even if that means pissing you off.”

You narrowed your eyes, fury blazing in your chest. He was looking right at you, like he could see through every layer you tried so hard to put up. But there was something deeper in his gaze, a flicker of something that made your heart race even as anger burned within you. And you hated that he could do that—make you feel so exposed, so raw, yet so alive all at once.

But to him, this was just another game. He thrived on your frustration, on the way he could get under your skin with just a few well-placed words. It was a twisted power play, a battle neither of you were willing to lose. And for a moment, the air between you was charged, almost electrifying, the tension so thick it was nearly suffocating. 

You wanted to hate him, but a part of you couldn’t help but wonder if he was right—if he really did see through to the parts of you that no one else dared to touch.

But that only made you angrier, and you felt a surge of resentment rise within you, pushing you over the edge. With a sudden flash of fury, you slammed your fists onto the table, the sound echoing through the room, your voice sharp and cutting. “You know what? Fuck you, Rafe Cameron.”

Without another word, you turned and stormed out.

The sound reverberated through the Cameron household, leaving a heavy silence. Rafe stood there, fists clenched, trying to swallow down the mix of anger and something else—something that felt dangerously close to longing.

Sarah raised an eyebrow at her brother. “You’re a fucking asshole, you know that?”

Rafe shot her a look, irritation simmering just beneath the surface. “You don’t get it, Sarah. She’s… She’s infuriating.”

But then he hesitated, his gaze drifting toward the door you had just stormed out of. The edge of his lips twitched in a way that was all too vulnerable, too honest. “But there’s something about her,” he admitted, his voice softening. “She’s fierce and passionate. When she’s angry, it’s like she’s alive in a way I can’t help but be drawn to. It’s frustrating, but… but she’s not afraid to challenge me, to call me out.” He paused, searching for the right words, his heart racing.

“And so that makes it right for you to annoy her to that point?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I can’t help it. I want her to see the real me, too. It’s like I can’t breathe when she’s around and then—when she leaves? It’s like the air just… disappears.” He ran a hand through his hair, a mix of confusion and desire etched across his features. “She challenges me in ways I never expected, and it drives me insane, but I can’t help but want more of her.”

“Wow,” Sarah said softly, her voice full of surprise. “I didn’t think I’d see the day Rafe Cameron talked about someone like this—but mess around with her like that one more time, and I’ll hurt you.”

The sun spilled into your bedroom, casting a warm glow that felt inviting. But you stirred, still brimming with the tumult of emotions from last night. Rafe’s words echoed in your mind—his teasing, the way he pushed your buttons, and the way your heart raced despite your annoyance. You groaned and rolled over, pulling the blanket over your head, hoping to drown out the memories.

But then laughter broke through the haze of your thoughts. It was bright and carefree, drifting in through the open window. Intrigued, you tossed off the blanket and slid out of bed, your curiosity piqued. A quick glance outside revealed the source of the joyful sounds: Sarah, Wheezie, and Rafe were out by the pool, splashing water and playfully throwing each other around.

Rafe, wearing nothing but swim trunks that hung low on his hips, was the centerpiece of the scene, effortlessly drawing your gaze. His tanned skin glimmered, accentuating the muscles that rippled as he dove and surfaced in the water, laughter spilling from his lips, infectious and buoyant.

You caught yourself ogling him, eyes roaming over the way the water dripped from his hair, the way his body moved with ease and confidence. It wasn’t fair, really—how could someone be so effortlessly captivating? The sun caught the edges of his grin as he tossed Wheezie playfully into the pool, the sound of her laughter ringing out like music.

You were lost in the moment, so caught up in the heat of his gaze that you didn’t even notice the way your thighs clenched together, craving the contact that felt just out of reach. All you could think about was the overwhelming desire to touch him—everywhere. You imagined your hands gliding over his toned chest, feeling the hard flex of his biceps beneath your fingertips, tracing the lines of his powerful arms as they wrapped around your body, waist, and ass pulling you closer.

You wanted him. God, did you want him.

Why did he have this effect on you? Why was he constantly invading your thoughts, even now?

A sudden buzz from your phone pulled you from your reverie. You grabbed it from the bedside table and saw a message from Sarah: “Get your ass out here! We’re in the pool, it’s fun! You’ll want to join us!”

A smile tugged at your lips at Sarah's enthusiasm, but a moment of hesitation passed as you remembered the tension of last night. Still, you didn’t want to be the odd one out. With a determined sigh, you pulled yourself away from the window and began to get ready.

You rummaged through your drawers, searching for that one bikini that made you look stunning and earned you a handful of compliments every time you wore it. Finally, you found it: a deep emerald green that contrasted perfectly against your skin tone. It was cut high, accentuating your legs, the top was daring, showing just enough to leave to the imagination. You paired it with a pair of denim shorts.

You headed towards the back door, nerves swirling in your stomach. As you stepped outside, the head of the sun hit you like a wave, and the sounds of laughter grew louder.

“You’re awake!” Sarah exclaimed, her voice bright and cheerful. “I thought we’d have to drag you out here!”

You laughed lightly, feeling a playful energy surge within you. “I’m here, aren’t I?” You shot back, trying to keep your tone light as you made your way toward the pool.

Wheezie exclaimed, eyes wide of admiration. “Wow, Y/N! Look at you!”

“Thanks!” you replied, trying to play it cool but secretly loving the attention. You glanced at Rafe, who had turned to face you, and your heart raced at the sight of him leaning against the pool’s edge, water cascading down his toned body.

His gaze lingered on you, a mix of surprise and appreciation playing across his features. “Well, well, if it isn’t the queen herself,” he teased, that infuriating smirk stretching across his face. “Nice of you to join us.”

You rolled your eyes and turned your back to him, feigning indifference as you busied yourself with anything but him. The events of last night were still fresh in your mind, a heated clash that left you reeling and more than a little irritated. You were determined not to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.

“Oh, so I get the silent treatment?” he drawled, his voice dripping with playful disbelief. “I’m devastated,” he added, the corner of his mouth quirking up in that infuriatingly irresistible smirk that always made your heart flutter.

Instead, you focused on Sarah and Wheezie, who were gleefully splashing water at each other. You couldn’t help but feel the pull of their energy. 

Hours rolled by and you settled onto a lounge chair, you could feel Rafe’s eyes on you, the heat of his gaze igniting your skin in a way that both thrilled and annoyed you. He was still in the pool, looking at you like he wanted to eat you alive. You didn’t know but you were driving him crazy with that attitude of yours, this whole ignoring thing and your fucking bikini. 

Sarah and Wheezie went inside the house to prepare some snacks and drinks for us because we were getting hungry and thirsty, leaving only Rafe and you. 

You pulled your phone, pretending to scroll through social media, anything to distract yourself from the way your heart raced at his presence. A notification lit up your phone, and your heart skipped a beat when you saw Jake’s name flash across the screen. The excitement surged through you as you opened the message:

"Hey, gorgeous. I really like you, and I’d love to take you out sometime. You in?"

He was cute—way too cute.

A grin crept onto your lips, and for once, you allowed yourself to enjoy the attention from someone who wasn’t toying with your emotions. Someone who actually seemed genuine. No games, no mixed signals. Just interest. The kind that felt refreshing after dealing with someone who never seemed to know what he wanted.

You barely had time to revel in it before Rafe’s voice cut through the moment, sharp and demanding. “What’s got you smiling like that?”

Your grip tightened on your phone instinctively, and you flicked your gaze up to him, feigning nonchalance. “Oh, nothing. Just a friend,” you said, slipping your phone screen down against your thigh.

Rafe wasn’t buying it. His eyes narrowed, skepticism written all over his face. “Just a friend, huh?” His voice had that dangerous edge to it, the one you knew too well. “Funny, you don’t usually smile like that over friends.”

You felt his eyes burning into you, but you refused to give him the satisfaction. “Really? Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think,” you teased, biting back the smirk threatening to break free.

Rafe’s jaw clenched. “Who was it?”

“Like I said, just a friend,” you repeated, your voice smooth, but now you were teasing on purpose. You could feel his irritation rising, and part of you enjoyed it. “What, are you jealous or something?”

He scoffed, though you didn’t miss the way his eyes darkened. “Why the hell would I be jealous?” he snapped, though it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself than you. “I’m just asking a question.”

“Uh-huh.” You raised an eyebrow, leaning back and tilting your head, watching him closely. “Right. Just a casual question, huh? Totally doesn’t sound like someone’s jealous.”

His hands were now resting on the edge of the pool, gripping it just a little too tightly. “I’m not jealous,” he repeated, but the way his gaze darted to your phone said otherwise. “But if it’s someone trying to get at you, then yeah, I wanna know. Who is it?”

“Someone,” you said vaguely, enjoying the fact that Rafe was teetering on the edge of losing it. “Someone who’s interested, clearly.”

Rafe’s eyes flared, and the jealousy in his voice became impossible to miss. “Interested in what? You?” His lips curled into a scowl, his muscles tense. “What, you think some random guy’s gonna—”

“Maybe,” you cut in, your smile growing. “Maybe he’s actually straightforward, you know? No mind games, no drama. Just a guy who knows what he wants.”

His brows shot up, the implication stinging. “And you think I don’t know what I want?”

You shrugged, not backing down an inch. “Well, you never seem to make it that clear. Maybe someone else is going to take your place as my—”

The possessiveness in his eyes flared. He pushed himself up out of the pool, water dripping from his shoulders as he moved closer, his presence looming over you. “No one’s stepping up, got it? No one’s taking my place.”

You met his gaze, unflinching, even as your heart raced a little faster. “Oh? And what exactly is your place, Rafe?”

He leaned in, the heat between you practically crackling. “You know damn well where my place is,” he murmured, his voice low, daring, yet with a hint of uncertainty creeping in. “And I’m not about to let some bitch ass slide in because you think I don’t care.”

You smiled, tilting your head, savoring the tension. “Seems like you do care. Maybe more than you want to admit.”

“Because I do care, Y/N,” he murmured softly, swiping his wet thumb across your cheek. “I told you already that I cared way too damn much.”

Rafe’s thumb lingered on your cheek, the warmth of his touch sending shivers through your body despite the heat of the day. His eyes held yours, dark and intense, as if he were trying to convey all the words he couldn’t quite say aloud. The air between you was thick, charged with a tension that had been building for far too long.

You swallowed hard, trying to hold onto some semblance of control, but it was a losing battle. “Your way of showing it is fucked, Rafe.”

Your words were meant to cut, but they came out softer than you intended, almost like a challenge. His jaw tightened, but instead of snapping back with some cocky retort, he stepped even closer. The scent of chlorine and his skin invaded your senses, and you couldn’t help but notice how his muscles tensed as he towered over you, dripping with water, his presence commanding.

“I care,” he repeated, his voice lower now, almost a growl. His eyes flicked down to your lips and back to your eyes, like he was making a decision in real time. “I care more than you know.”

Before you could muster a reply, his hand slid from your cheek to the back of your neck, pulling you just a little closer, your breath hitching as his lips hovered near your ear. “I think you know exactly what my place is,” he murmured, his voice rough with unspoken desire. “And you’re not running from it.”

His breath was hot against your skin, sending a wave of heat cascading down your spine. He didn’t move right away, as if savoring the tension that crackled between you, the nearness, the inevitability of it all. Your heart pounded in your chest, your pulse quickening as his lips brushed, ever so lightly, against the sensitive spot just below your ear.

You gasped, your hands instinctively gripping the fabric of your shorts as your body reacted to him, heat pooling low in your belly. “Rafe…” you whispered, not quite a protest, but not quite giving in either.

But he wasn’t about to back down now. He shifted closer, his mouth grazing the curve of your neck, soft at first, then firmer, the scrape of his teeth making your pulse race. Your skin ignited under his touch, and a low moan escaped your lips before you could stop it.

“You feel that?” he whispered, his lips trailing lower, his voice husky and thick with need. “That’s not some game. That’s real.”

Your body arched toward him of its own accord, your resistance melting as his hands slid down to your waist, fingers pressing firmly into your skin, pulling you closer. You could feel the heat of his breath on your neck, his lips teasing, torturing, as they brushed along your collarbone. Every touch, every whisper was setting your nerves alight, and you were dizzy with the intensity of it.

“You’re such an ass,” you muttered, trying to keep a shred of control, but your voice lacked conviction.

He chuckled softly, the sound vibrating against your skin. “Maybe,” he agreed, his lips brushing the spot just beneath your ear again, sending a fresh wave of shivers down your spine. “But you can’t stop thinking about me, can you?”

You hated how right he was. You hated how easily he could unravel you, how even now, you were leaning into his touch, craving more of it. But there was no way you were giving him the satisfaction of hearing it.

“Stop being so cocky,” you managed to whisper, though your voice wavered with the desire that coursed through you.

But Rafe wasn’t in the mood to stop. His hand slid to your lower back, pulling your body flush against his, the coolness of his skin mingling with your own heat. You could feel the hard lines of his body pressed against yours, his chest rising and falling as his lips grazed your shoulder, his teeth scraping lightly against your skin, just enough to make you shudder.

“Admit it,” he murmured against your neck, his voice a deep, rough command. “You want this.”

You closed your eyes, fighting to hold onto your last thread of self-control, but the tension between you was overwhelming, suffocating. His lips moved lower, placing slow, deliberate kisses along your collarbone, each one leaving a trail of fire in its wake. Your breath came in ragged gasps as your body betrayed you, leaning into him, craving the heat of his touch, the weight of his gaze, the way he made you feel like the only person in the world.

“Rafe…” you breathed, your voice barely audible, as his hand slid down to your hip, his fingers digging into your skin possessively. You could feel his breath on your neck, his lips hovering just above the place where your pulse raced beneath the surface.

“I want you, Y/N,” he whispered against your skin, his voice raw, filled with the desire that had been simmering between you for what felt like forever. “And I’m not letting anyone else have you.”

His words sent a shiver down your spine, and before you could think better of it, your hands were in his hair, pulling him closer, your body aching for the contact you’d been denying yourself for so long.

Your lips collided with his in a heated rush, all the pent-up tension and desire finally unraveling between you. Rafe’s hands immediately gripped your hips, pulling you impossibly closer as he kissed you like he’d been waiting for this moment forever. His lips were demanding, rough and hungry, but there was a softness to the way he held you, like he wanted to savor every second. You melted into him, fingers tangling in his wet hair, feeling the slickness of the pool water on his skin as his body pressed against yours.

The taste of him, mixed with the faint tang of chlorine, was intoxicating. It was all-consuming, drowning out every rational thought. He kissed you like he was staking his claim, like he wanted to erase any trace of doubt from your mind, and for a moment, you let him. Your body responded instinctively, arching against his as his hands roamed down your back, gripping you tighter.

When you finally broke apart, both of you gasping for air, Rafe’s forehead rested against yours, his eyes dark with desire and something deeper—something more vulnerable. His chest heaved as he looked at you, his breath coming in ragged bursts. “I like you, Y/N,” he murmured, his voice rough with emotion. “I like you so much it drives me crazy. No more pretending.”

You stared into his eyes, searching for any hint of the cocky facade he usually wore, but it was gone. This was Rafe stripped bare, no teasing, no arrogance—just raw honesty. It made your heart race in a way that had nothing to do with the kiss.

Your breath caught in your throat as you considered what he was saying. Could you trust him? Could you really let your guard down and give in to this, knowing how easily he could hurt you?

But before you could overthink it, he kissed you again, slower this time, more deliberate. His lips moved against yours with a tenderness that made your chest ache, and all your doubts melted away. At that moment, it didn’t matter what had happened before, or what might happen after. All that mattered was how he made you feel right now—wanted, desired, seen.

Rafe pulled back, his thumb brushing gently against your bottom lip, his eyes flicking between yours. “Tell me you feel it too,” he whispered, his voice rough, almost pleading. “Tell me I’m not the only one. Tell me, princess.”

You swallowed hard, your heart hammering in your chest. There was no point in pretending anymore. “You’re not,” you admitted, your voice barely a whisper. “You drive me crazy, Rafe, too—I don’t want to feel this way, but I do.”

His lips curved into a small, triumphant smile, but there was relief in his eyes too, like he’d been holding his breath, waiting for you to say it. “Good,” he murmured, his hand cupping your face as his thumb stroked your cheek. “Because I don’t think I can let you go.”

[crabs-nonsense]

Guys. Depression. *melts into the floor*

[lastoneout]

I keep thinking about all of the disabled activists and people before me who stranded themselves on the 4th floor of buildings for weeks and crawled up stairs and fought with airline staff and schools and doctors and refused to stop existing in the face of injustice and bigotry no matter how big and scary and hopeless it seemed. Every time I get angry and scared the protests that lead to the creation of the ADA pop up again and remind me that disabled people are so much fucking stronger than anyone has ever given us credit for, and I can't help but be proud of that. And I know not all disabled people feel like we should take pride in our disabilities and have flags or whatever, but I think not just living, but thriving, in spite of a world that wants us dead and gone, in the face of both illness and persecution, and how we've not only bought ourselves forward, but uplifted the disabled people around us, secured more equal futures for everyone who will come after, and truly changed the way so many abled people have seen us for the better is something to be damn fucking proud of.

We have always been here and we always will be, there will never be a world without disabled people because being disabled is not bad, it's a natural part of the human experience and yeah it sucks some times but even when it sucks we have fought to build beautiful, unique, happy lives with people, both like us and not, and that should be celebrated.

The first sign of human civilization is the healed femur. The body of the profoundly disabled person who would have needed help to even just eat being carefully laid to rest after decades of a full, happy life. The medicinal plants showing even before we were entirely human we were doing what we could to not just survive, but alleviate suffering while we're at it. Above everything, evolution selected not the baby who can walk and eat and be quiet, but the one that can ask for help.

Disabled people are not just angry cockroach motherfuckers who refuse to die, we are proof of humanity's HUMANITY. Proof that natural selection selected a species that takes care of each other. From healed femurs and medicinal plants to vaccines and IVs and insulin to now, we are driven to help one another, we are at our strongest when we don't leave our most vulnerable behind. And I am living proof of that. My mother is living proof of that. Every disabled and chronically and/or mentally ill person I know is living proof of that.

And I don't know about the rest of you, but will carry that shred of humanity's true nature inside me like it's my fucking soul. I am scared and angry and hurt, but I have a lifetime's experience being scared and angry, and I can shake off the kind of pain that would make Atlas crumble to dust like it's nothing but a stiff fucking breeze. Disabled people have always been here, turning fear and anger and pain into joy and beauty and connection, and I'm not going to let everyone who came before me down. I'm not going to give up. Not now, not ever.

It's okay if you're disabled and you've hit your limit, you're too scared and tired and hurt, I won't blame you. But I won't abandon you, either. I might not be able to right all of the wrongs in the world, but I'll be strong, I'll carry all of you with me, I will not give up.

As I've said before, society hates a cripple who won't die, so we must spite them and live anyway.

Please, live anyway. I know if anyone can, it's us.

[greengoblinswifey]

Super Eater—Nicholas Chavez x Fem!Reader

summary— nicholas loves eating your pussy, anywhere and anytime. based on this request.

warnings— oral(f receiving), overstimulation, praise kink, pussy worshiping.

a/n—the title is actually sending me LMFAOAOA. working on the requests slowly but surely <3

Nicholas had a devotion to your pleasure that was almost relentless. Every so often, he’d give you this look—a mix of awe and pure need, and you’d know exactly what he wanted, to eat you out. It didn’t matter where you were; he was completely undeterred by anything. He did not care. All he cared about was his tongue in your pussy.

One night, the two of you were driving back from a date, winding down a quiet road surrounded by trees. Without warning, Nicholas pulled over, his face determined and eyes gleaming. “Nick, what are you doing?” you asked, your laughter mingling with excitement.

He gave a sheepish grin before his voice dropped to a murmur, filled with that familiar intensity. “You know I can’t wait, I need to taste you now.” The night proceeded with your legs in the air in the backseat of his car, and him not caring about the slight uncomfortable position he was in as his tongue sucked on your clit.

Then there was that afternoon while out shopping. The two of you had barely stepped into a dressing room when Nicholas gave you a look that you recognized all too well. “We’re in public,” you whispered, but he only shook his head with a playful smile.

“No one will hear,” he reassured, already leaning in. “I just need to show you how much I love eating your pussy.”

At a family gathering, Nicholas found a chance to slip away with you upstairs, where he gently pulled you into an empty bathroom. You let out an incredulous laugh, whispering, “This is not the place.” But he just gazed at you, completely unbothered, his cheeks flushed with his usual sweetness yet edged with that fierce determination.

“I don’t care,” he murmured, his voice reverent. “I need to feel you cum on my tongue.”

As usual, you gave in to his need and ended up with your own panties in your mouth as Nicholas lapped at your juices. Your taste was better than anything his family had cooked that evening.

Another time, the two of you were at Cooper Koch’s rooftop party. The music thumped in the background, people mingling just outside the stairwell where you both slipped away. He had that look again, and you couldn’t help but giggle as he pulled you close. “Here? Seriously?”

With a soft, unbothered grin, he whispered, “I just need a few minutes to eat you out baby, you drive me insane.”

After each of these spontaneous moments, you couldn’t help but ask him. “Nick, I don’t get it. You love doing this more than anything. Why?”

He chuckled, a hint of a blush coloring his cheeks, before looking at you with complete sincerity. “I don’t know if I can put it all into words. It’s fucking everything about you,” he said, voice reverent, “the way you smell, the way you taste, I love watching you lose yourself, how you get all squirmish.” His voice softened even more, gaze affectionate yet intense. “I just want to make love to you like this. Make love to your pussy, show you how much I fucking love it. It’s about you and making you feel good, that’s all I fucking need.

His words though so dirty, left you feeling adored, with no doubt of just how deeply he cared about your pleasure. He absolutely worshiped you, especially your pussy. He always believed women when they would talk about the power of the pussy due to how much power yours had over him. It was like it was tethered to him, like it called out to him. Like it craved his skillful tongue the way he craved to taste and savor it too.

One night, a particular premiere you attended was packed, the energy high, and the atmosphere electric. You and Nicholas had just snuck into the bathroom for a quick breather when he turned to you, eyes filled with a familiar look of lust.

“Nicholas, no,” you whispered, laughing softly as he stepped closer, his hands wrapping around your waist. “We can’t, not here.”

“I need to,” he murmured, almost pleading, voice husky and low as he licked his lips. “Please, I can’t wait. I know you’re aching to have my mouth on that clit.” His lips ghosted along your jaw, and before you could say no again, you felt yourself giving in.

The way he touched you was always more than gentle—it was worshipful, his mouth leaving you breathless and gripping onto him for support as he’d make you feel like you were the only person in the world. His skillful movements had a way of knowing exactly what you needed, drawing out every little sound until you couldn’t think straight.

When you finally left the bathroom, both of you were trying not to laugh, cheeks flushed and pulses racing. You caught a knowing smile from Cooper waiting outside who must have heard, and Nicholas just pulled you close, grinning as you both walked away, hands intertwined.

“That was risky,” you said, breathless and still tingling.

He just smiled, leaning close to whisper, “Worth it. That pretty fucking pussy is worth every second of it.”

He loved when you were in the comfort of your own home, how he could bend you over anywhere, and anytime—not that he couldn’t and didn’t do the same thing when you were out. It’s just that being at home made him able to savor you even more. There was no one to interrupt, no reason to look over his shoulder, no reason to make it quick.

If you were in the kitchen making something in those tiny little booty shorts, your coils free and just one of his t shirts draped over you, he’d hike it up, pulling down your little shorts and burying his face in your plump ass, his tongue darting to lick your pussy from the back. You’d be standing up convulsing, your hand gripping the counter as he knelt down behind you, absolutely ravishing you like a man possessed.

He would not stop until your legs turned to jelly and you’d fall to your knees, but he was relentless.

On this particular night, something feral awakened inside him. He was always feral but there was something different. Maybe it had to do with you being out of the country with your girls for the week and not having any physical contact. Whatever it was, it had Nicholas worked up the moment you left and the moment you called him to pick you up from the airport.

He hugged you tightly, placing your bags in the trunk and you immediately noticed that familiar glint in his eye. You sighed internally, knowing this would probably lead to a session on the side of the road but you were shocked when he just drove straight home. Though, his hand remained on your thigh the entire drive, moving to your clothed pussy and rubbing periodically.

“Fucking hell you tortured me,” he began, “one whole fucking week without your pussy in my mouth.”

You rolled your eyes, staring out the window as you pulled into the driveway, not knowing just how serious and feral he was.

You barely finished your long, relaxing bath when Nicholas appeared, sweeping you into his arms before you could even catch your breath. His lips crashed against yours, desperate and needy, his hands trailing over your still damp skin as he pulled you close.

“I missed you,” he murmured, his voice thick with longing. “I missed your taste, your scent, the way you’d writhe under my touch, scream my name, fucking everything. I need that pussy, now.”

His intensity left you breathless, and before you knew it, he was leading you toward the bed. “Sit on face,”he whispered, eyes dark with anticipation. “Let me show you just how much I worship this pussy.”

You felt a shiver run through you as you settled above him, and he looked up at you with a grin, his hands holding you close as he murmured, “Perfect.” His movements were filled with a fierce, passionate need, each touch and kiss a reminder of how much he’d missed you, his hands steadying you while he worshiped every inch.

The feeling was like ecstasy, you were high in the clouds from the way he lapped at your juices, his tongue flat against your pussy then curling and flicking exactly where you needed it.

His little moans of content had you shivering and holding on to the bed frame for support.

You gasped, overwhelmed by his intensity, and he looked up, grinning as he said, “Don’t hold back, I want it all.”

You couldn’t hold back if you wanted to, his tongue was practically penetrating your hole as he shoved it inside, sucking and licking everything that came out of you.

“I love this pussy, you’re amazing, everything about you,” he groaned.

Your cries grew louder and more desperate, each time you felt like you were on the edge, he’d slow down his movements.

“This pussy is heaven, I’d die if I couldn’t have my mouth on it.”

“God, mm- this fucking pussy has me in a chokehold.”

“So tight, you’re just clenching around my tongue.”

“You’re so perfect, this pussy is perfect in every single way.”

“I could have you on top of me for the rest of eternity.”

“Grind on my face, rub your pussy all over my face, give it to me baby.”

His words had you sobbing in pleasure, and he kept you on edge so you could get even more sloppy and needy for him. Your pussy practically soaked his mouth and was dripping down his chin.

“Please Nick, I really need to cum,” you pleaded.

“Just a bit more baby, I need to have you soak me a little bit more.”

Nicholas had you on the edge for what felt like forever, teasing and taking his time, his mouth moving over your pussy with a focus that made every nerve in your body come alive. He looked up at you now and then, that glint in his eye as he paused just when you were about to fall over the edge, whispering praises and reassurances.

“Fuck, I’d do anything for you, you have me under your spell,” he murmured, his voice warm and low, sending another shiver through you. “So perfect for me, every single part of you.”

Every time you felt yourself getting closer, his pace would change, drawing you back just enough to keep you in a state of dizzy anticipation. The way he looked at you, like you were all he ever wanted, made you melt as he made love to your pussy and worshiped you.

Finally, when he decided you’d had enough, he held you steady and whispered, “Let go for me baby, I want you to squirt all over my face, I’ve got you.”

At his words, the dam inside you finally broke, and the release was overwhelming. You trembled beneath his touch, feeling completely lost in the intensity of it as he held you, anchoring you through every moment. You soaked him, your orgasm spraying from you as his face and chest was drenched in your juices. His grin, proud and gentle, was the last thing you saw as he lifted you from on top of him lay you down and kissed you softly, murmuring, “Perfect. My perfect girl.”

[heart4caitlin]

LUNCH / sevika

Sevika x fem!reader nsfw headcanons

WC: no idea!!

for @mrsarnold

Sevika seems like the type to be into bigger women... sorry..

Constantly wants to be touching you in some way, sexual or non sexual, doesn't matter. she wants to be touching you all the time, keeping her hand on your thigh when sitting down anywhere, it's even gotten to the point where she makes you sit in her lap so you could be touching her.

She is a MUNCH i swear to god she is, wanting to eat you out until you're crying and begging for her to stop because you're so sensitive. her holding your thighs down as you jerk against her, but she doesn't care because she knows she's stronger than you

size kink.... yeah gets off on knowing she is bigger/taller than you.. This is really for me but her just resting her weight on you especially when her strap is in you to make sure she goes as deep as she can

i just know she is possessive, constantly keeping an arm around you in any public place and shooting people looks if they stare at you for too long.

i know y'all saw that scene with Caitlyn biting her... she is SO into biting, whether it's you biting her or the other way around. she mainly just wants to leave her marks on you even though everyone knows you belong to her.

I can see her being soft half the time, wanting to take her time with you and treating you so sweetly. Wants to kiss you passionately, slow deep thrusts, just making sure she's skin to skin with you. But after a long day of dealing with assholes she wants to be rough with you. Pulling your hair, overstimulating you till you're crying, choking you, spitting in your mouth...

She just wants to please you so bad, she gets off on seeing you cum with her name leaving your mouth.

Yeah she wants to please you but you pleasing her? Best thing ever. I don't see her as someone too loud in bed, groans and small moans falling from her when you're eating her out, but going down on her and making sure she comes at least twice before coming back up to kiss her. I'm honestly a sucker for pleasing so yeah..

Hear me out, with with an oral fixation? When she puts her mouth on you, she is not stopping until she's satisfied. Sucking on your clit till your hips are jerking against her face and she has to hold you down as she makes you cum again.

I think everyone in the fandom has agreed on her having a breeding kink, so yeah let's add that. Her favorite position would be missionary just so she can keep your face in her view, sometimes leaning down to suck marks on your neck, biting you too... Holds your cheeks together to make you stare at her because god does she love holding eye contact with you.

Loves when you go down on her strap, yeah she can't technically feel it but phantom strap..?? She doesn't have her arm anymore, doesn't mean she still can't feel it. She swears that she can feel you gagging on her and has actually came from it once.

a/n: this is so short but i really didn't feel like adding any more onto this... been really busy recently btw!! trying my best to be active but i haven't spent much time on my phone