#I can’t believe that’s his actual name
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luveline · 2 days ago
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would you be able to do hotch’s adult daughter meeting the team?
—Hotch introduces his daughter to the team. 1.3k
“Aaron?” 
He’s grateful you didn’t call him Mr. Hotchner, but dad might not hurt. “Everything okay, honey?” he asks the phone. 
“Sure, um. This might be presumptuous and, like, embarrassing for me, but my last class got cancelled and I was wondering if I can come to your office today?” 
He feels his brows rise of their own accord. He checks his watch. You’ve picked a good day to want to come. “Sure, it’s quiet here.”
“You don’t want me to explain why?” 
“Presumptuous and embarrassing for me, I thought it might be to see your dear old dad.” 
You laugh funny on the other side, like Jack when he’s surprised. “Kind of. I do want to see you, but I was wondering what it’s like. In the FBI, I mean.” 
“You’re interested?” 
“In working there?” you ask. 
“It’s fine if you were, you don’t have to worry.” 
“It looks too intense for me, but… yeah, I guess I want to know what you do all day. I don’t know anything about that part of your life, and it’s such a big part of it.” 
He’s trying hard to say Yes to you at every opportunity, and this yes is easy. He sends a car to get you because he can, preparing himself for a lot of fawning and surprise. The BAU team, namely, Spencer, Derek, JJ, Emily, Dave, and Penelope, know who you are, but the office itself has little knowledge of you. There was chatter the day you turned up here unannounced. You haven’t been to the office since. 
He exits his office and finds Spencer, Emily, and Derek in the bullpen doing their paperwork, among other things. Derek’s peeling an orange. Spencer has his nose in a book despite a hand on the computer mouse. 
“Are you ready?” he asks them. 
“For what, the round table?” Emily asks. 
“Y/N’s coming into the office.” 
Three backs straighten in unison. “The kid?” Derek asks with a grin. He’s the only one who’s actually met you, and it drives the others mad with jealousy. 
“My kid, yes,” he says. He can’t help smiling. “She wants to see what we do. Please don’t show her anything with blood or gore, though. Please.” 
“Scout’s honour,” Emily says, standing from her desk to brush herself down. “Out of everything that’s happened when I started here, is it strange that this is the craziest?” 
“It’s up there,” Spencer says. 
“It’s certainly the nicest surprise I’ve had,” Aaron says, not quite missing the look Emily and Derek share even as he spots you at the office doors with your visitor’s pass clipped to the belt of your skirt. 
He walks to meet you, lest the sheer sea of faces intimidate you. “Everything okay?” he asks. 
You pull your jacket tighter around you, but it’s not a warm thing —if anything, it seems to be a stiff cardigan, grey and white plaid with ornate buttons. “It’s freezing out there.” 
“You’ll feel much warmer in a minute. The heat has been on high all day, JJ’s orders.” He slips his hand behind your back and shepherds you to the bullpen. “Honey, these are some of the members of my team. Supervisory special agents Prentiss, Morgan, and Reid.” 
“Emily,” Emily says, thrusting her hand forward to shake. 
“Spencer,” Spencer adds, managing to escape a handshake as Derek steps in. 
“Derek Morgan,” he introduces himself, shaking your hand with a warm smile. “I can see now why you were reluctant to tell me what you were here for.” 
Your smile goes sideways, like you’re startled, but pleased nonetheless, “I– honestly, I thought you’d make me leave if you heard what I had to say. It’s still not believable.”
“You sound like him,” Spencer says. “Not masculine, but–”
“Mellifluous,” you and Aaron say at the same time. 
“Exactly.” 
“Freaky,” Emily says, though her smile is brilliant. 
When Aaron sat the team down to tell them, it wasn’t because he necessarily wanted to. He loves you as any man loves their child even if he still has mountains to learn about you, and the urge to brag about you doesn’t go away, but he was hoping he wouldn’t have to answer so many questions about you at the time. As far as anybody in Aaron’s life knows, he and Haley haven’t ever split, it was a private parting, and so the first thing he sensed from everyone was a shift in image. “I didn’t cheat on Haley,” he’d said quickly, with a suffering sigh, “we were broken up at the time.” 
“Like, on a break?” Emily had asked, cringing. 
No, not really. Aaron assumed he and Haley were broken up permanently when he slept with your mother, but that brief relationship cemented for him that he loved his now-wife. Now that the team know he’s not an adulterer, the only thing he has while presenting you to them is pride. 
“Y/N’s class was cancelled today, so I’m going to show her around the office and give her some insight into what we do here,” he says, catching your attention with a grin. “It’s not as though you need today's lecture, hm? She’s nearly the top of her class.” 
You shake your head at him, beaming but mortified, “Don’t.” 
“If she didn’t work so hard–”
“He’s trying to get me to quit my job,” you tell the others. “He’s overbearing.” 
“We know,” Emily says. 
“I just think that now is a time for studying, and you’ve worked hard enough already.” 
You shift marginally closer to him. Most people wouldn’t notice, but Aaron does, and he suspects his team do to. “I’m fine doing both,” you say. 
He’s sure he’ll win the argument one day. For now, he escorts you through the office to the round table, then his office, pulling you into Rossi’s office for a charming hello and then to JJ’s, where you’re greeted with excitement and a disarming amount of love. Aaron forgets sometimes how much he and his team have been through together. You really are a good surprise. 
“Where are we going now?” you ask, following Aaron down a long corridor. 
He smiles. “You don’t have a sensitivity to high-pitched noises, do you?” 
Your confusion is plain on your face. Aaron takes you to a familiar door, placard reading in big, black letters: PENELOPE GARCIA, BAU TOP TECH AND DATA ANALYST. It’s surrounded by pink heart shaped stickers. 
He knocks the ajar door politely. “Garcia?” he asks.
“Sir?” Penelope says back. 
He eases open the door with his foot. Penelope turns in her chair, blonde hair in windswept curls, her lips painted a pink-orange. 
“Garcia, this is Y/N, my daughter.” 
Penelope’s mouth falls open. “I know who she is,” she says, nearly monotonous. 
“It’s nice to meet you,” you say. “I’ve heard so much about you. I love your trinkets,” you add, nodding at her wild desk. 
Penelope gives Aaron a pleading look. He nods. 
“Oh my god oh my god oh my god!” Penelope says, rushing forward to throw her arms around you. “I can’t believe you’re here!”
You laugh and bow gently under her weight. “Me neither,” you say sincerely. 
“Oh my gosh. Oh my god,” she says, pulling away to smile at Aaron, “she sounds like you, you weren’t kidding! How is it possible that she sounds like you?” 
“Strong genetics?” he suggests. 
“I’ve never been this happy in my life,” Penelope says. 
He watches you take Penelope’s excited hand and thinks, that makes two of us. 
“You’re so adorable, I’m looking for Hotch in your face but you don’t look like him at all. But your clothes! You’re so cute, like a baby politician!” 
“I’m almost twenty three.” 
“So young,” Penelope fawns. 
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meleeyz · 1 day ago
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୭ 𝗩𝗜𝗞𝗧𝗢𝗥'𝗦 𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗘 ˚. ᵎᵎ 
ekko 𝒙 fem!reader
viktor 𝒙 fem!reader (platonic)
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୨୧ English is not my first language, so I regret in advance if something reads weird or is misspelled
୨୧ I don't know, I just thought it would be a fun dynamic, enjoy!
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
𓆤 Ekko crashing into you on his hoverboard was how it all began. It happened during one of your hurried trips back to Zaun after a grueling week in Piltover’s laboratories. You were distracted, engrossed in your mental checklist of materials Viktor had asked you to bring. You didn't even notice the faint whir of Ekko’s hoverboard until it was too late.
“Hey, watch—” Ekko started, his voice sharp with alarm before cutting off mid-sentence as the two of you collided.
You landed flat on your back with a groan, Viktor's precious schematics flying out of your bag. Ekko was quick to get up and extend a hand to help you up.
“Oh crap, I didn’t mean to—uh, are you okay?” Ekko asked with a sheepish grin.
“You should really watch where you’re going!” you snapped, brushing yourself off. Then your eyes locked. It was hard to stay mad at someone who looks like they actually cared.
From then on, every return trip to Zaun seemed incomplete without bumping into him, either by accident or by his deliberate attempts to "run into" you.
𓆤 Ekko had mixed feelings about your constant back-and-forth trips. He understood why you had to be in Piltover so much—your apprenticeship under Viktor was important—but that didn’t mean he liked it.
“You know, it’s kinda unfair,” he said one evening, as the two of you sat on the rooftop of a crumbling Zaun building. The view of the Undercity's twinkling lights stretched around you, and the new prototype of his hoverboard leaned against the nearby wall. “Piltover gets you all day, and Zaun just gets you at night.”
𓆤 Ekko loved your sharp mind. In fact, he found your involvement with Hextech fascinating, even if he teased you endlessly about being a “Piltover nerd.”
“Look at you, little Miss Zaunite Hextech Genius,” he’d say with a smirk as he watched you tinker with a device. “All fancy with your gears and crystals. Can you make something that doesn’t explode?”
You rolled your eyes.
“This is for science. Not for impressing you.”
“Oh, but you already impress me.” He’d wink, leaning over your shoulder to inspect your work. His genuine curiosity often led to him offering ideas that somehow worked, despite his lack of formal training. You suspected his innate knack for mechanics rivaled even Viktor’s.
𓆤 Ekko would often stop by you house in Undercity unannounced, bringing little gifts—scrap metal he thought you could use or metal flowers that he made with his own hands for you
𓆤 You, in turn, would surprise him with modifications for his hoverboard or gadgets to help the Firelights. His reaction to your gifts was always the same: pure delight.
𓆤 Leaving aside the jokes, he loved watching you work, claiming it was “like seeing genius in action.” You’d laugh and tell him to stop distracting you, but his presence always made the hours fly by.
𓆤 The two of you shared countless late-night conversations on rooftops, swapping dreams and fears.
𓆤 It started subtly. Ekko’s laugh lingered in your mind longer than it should have. His voice, the way he said your name, echoed in your thoughts while you worked. You found yourself doodling in the margins of your notes, spiraling into daydreams that left you blushing.
𓆤 Viktor initially didn’t think much of Ekko—at least not directly. He only knew of him through your constant chatter.
“Ekko said this really clever thing about—” “Ekko helped me figure out how to—” “Ekko...”
Eventually, Viktor sighed and set down his pen.
“I can’t believe you’re getting so worked up about some guy,” he said, exasperation lacing his words.
“This one is different!” you protested, fidgeting with a loose thread on your sleeve. “He’s honest, he’s sweet—”
“Please…”
“He would never do anything to hurt me!”
Viktor raised an eyebrow.
“He’s a guy.”
“He’s also... brilliant. And kind... and handsome... and—”
“Oh shit, here we go again…” He exhaled, completely tired.
𓆤 The meeting happened in Piltover, under less-than-ideal circumstances. You’d convinced the Academy to grant you temporary access to the lab for a personal project, ostensibly Hextech-related. In truth, you were helping Ekko repair an broken stabilizer for the Firelights
You thought you were being sneaky. You were wrong.
Viktor appeared in the doorway, cane tapping against the marble floor. His eyes immediately landed on the device in Ekko’s hands and then flicked to you.
“And what,” he asked dryly, “is going on here?”
Ekko froze, looking like a child caught stealing candy. You scrambled to explain, words tumbling out in a panicked mess.
To your surprise, Viktor didn’t explode. Instead, he regarded Ekko with quiet intensity. After a long pause, he nodded.
“You have talent,” he said to Ekko. “Perhaps more than you deserve.”
Ekko grinned, clearly amused. “Thanks? I think?”
From then on, Viktor tolerated Ekko’s presence, though he would often sigh dramatically whenever you brought him up in conversation.
𓆤 The news of Viktor’s declining health hit you like a blow. For all his brilliance, your mentor was mortal, and the idea of losing him felt unbearable. You confided in Ekko, who held you as you cried, his quiet strength grounding you.
“He’s proud of you, you know,” Ekko said softly, stroking your back. “He might not say it, but he is.”
Those words stayed with you, offering comfort during the hardest days.
𓆤 As Viktor’s condition worsened, he grew more reflective. One day, he called you into his office. You found him gazing out the window, his frail frame silhouetted against the light.
“You’ve been a good apprentice,” he said without turning around. “Better than I deserved.”
“Don’t say that,” you whispered, your throat tight.
He turned to face you, his expression soft despite the lines of pain etched into his face.
“I’m sorry I won’t be there for your wedding day.”
Your eyes widened.
“What—?”
“I’m not blind,” he said with a faint smile. “Or deaf. That boy... he makes you happy.”
Tears welled in your eyes.
“He does.”
“Then go to him,” Viktor said gently. “And live. Live, my dear. Work, yes, but also live. With him.”
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
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wonderjanga · 8 hours ago
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Totally Me
When Billy first joined the league, he made sure to not tell anyone about his identity. This went on for nearly five years until he eventually started feeling bad for the others. They always look so sad. Not that blames them. He knows their names, where they live, their jobs, he knows almost everything about them, yet they know nothing about Marvel. So, Billy decided to tell them some things about himself, only it’s not himself. He told them about his dad, or at least what he remembers. He can’t exactly tell them he’s a twelve year old radio show host who lives in an apartment with his sister and his friend. Can he?
Supes: *talking about Jon*
Hermes: “Alright, Batson. You can do this!” *hyping him up like a sports coach*
Marvel: “He sounds awesome. The way you talk about him reminds me of Billy.”
Supes: “Billy? Who’s that?”
Marvel: *smiles* “My son.”
Supes: *jaw drops*
Clark was so happy his friend finally opened up with something about his personal life. He was smiling the entire day. This information eventually got around to the others so they tried to see if they could find out more too.
GA: “So, Cap, are you finally gonna come one of my mixers?” (ref to a fanfic I can’t remember the name of) *bros digging for information to see if cap is in a relationship*
Achilles: “Come on, Billy, let’s go! You can do this!”
Marvel: “No, I have a wife.”
GA: “A wife? What do you mean you have a wife? I expected a girlfriend not a wife?”
Marvel: *slightly nervous because he thinks Green Arrow might not believe him* “Yeah, well, I have a wife, okay?”
GA: “How long have you guys been married?”
Marvel: “Uh…” *doesn’t even know* “Like since 19-”
GA: “19??”
Marvel: “Yeah, 1920 or 30 something.” *is pretty sure that’s correct*
GA: “You’ve been married to your wife for almost 100 years…?”
Marvel: “Uh… yeah. Now that I think about it, yeah.”
By the way, anything Billy tells these guys, goes straight into the rumor mill. Once he divulges a little piece of information it’ll take like an hour, and then everyone knows.
Bruce even got in on the action by grabbing a form and walking up to Marvel:
Batman: “Captain, on your registration papers you left your occupation blank. Could you fill it out?”
Marvel: “Ah, sure!” *fills it out*
Batman: “Thank you.” *walks away and rounds a corner, only to be met with Clark*
Supes: “So, what’s his job?” *is hoping that Marvel is a reporter because he and Marvel have yapped about reporting multiple times*
Batman: *looks at the form* “He’s an archaeologist.”
Supes: “Archaeologist?” *sounds a little dumbfounded* “Huh. That seems so Marvel-like, yet so un-Marvel-like at the same time.”
Also, Billy does actually like archaeology. It’s one of bro’s special interests. In fact, to see if Marvel was telling the truth, Bruce asked a little bit about archaeology and was met with an hour long rant about how amazing it was.
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gojoest · 11 hours ago
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“I can’t believe you let that guy hold your hand”
Satoru was upset. Really upset. You could see it all over his face — jaw clenched, brows furrowed, the vein on his forehead so swollen it was threatening to pop any second now.
“You are being ridiculous”, you sigh. He’s been at it for 3 hours now and you no longer have the energy to try and beat some sense into him, he’s not listening to you anyway. “Please stop”, you ask for what probably is the hundredth time.
“Okay”, he audibly breathes under his nose, but surely doesn’t sound the least bit convincing, nor does he look like he’s given up, judging by the way he’s fervently searching up something on his phone, tapping left and right, downloading all kinds of social apps. “What’s his name?"
“You’re not going to look him up now, are you?”
He can’t be serious, you try to reason internally. He’s just being too silly right now pretending to throw another jealousy fit to show you just how much he loves you and how crazy he is about you, you try to convince yourself.
Yet, the look in his eyes refutes all of your hopes.
He has gone mad. He really is after that guy.
“Bingo. Name, please”
“I don’t remember it”, you let out an exasperated whine.
“Fine, I’ll just have Ijichi track that homewrecker down, then I’ll go deal with him personally myself”
“…”, you sigh once again. “And then what?”
“I’ll cut his hand and burn it”, he nonchalantly blurts out, his eyes focused on his phone as he types out instructions to Ijichi, along with a photo attached to the message.
3 hours ago, when things went terribly wrong
As promised, you were showing Satoru your childhood albums.
He was very eager to see how the mini you looked backed in the day. Basking in the sight of your adorable self from the photos, gushing over your chubby cheeks and cute outfits, he was asking about the story behind each shot and curiously listening to you go on and on about the old times and the little you he didn’t know about.
…that was until a certain group photo from kindergarten caught Satoru’s eyes.
“What’s this”, he pointed at it.
“It’s a group pic from kindergarten when I was four, I think? The teachers made us pair up and hold hands for the photo, and I ended up with this boy here”
Silence. Something was off.
Satoru wasn’t reacting the way he was to the other pictures. His smile was frozen on his lips but it was gone from his eyes, and he was unusually quiet too. The aura he was giving off was definitely eerie, and not the least bit loving.
“Yeah?”, Satoru spoke in a dull voice. “And you let him hold your hand?”
“What?”, you blinked twice. “I—, what?”
“You let another man touch you?”
“A man? He was four, and so was I — we were children, Satoru”, you, in complete disbelief, try to laugh it off. There was no way he could be actually upset about and jealous over something so ridiculous (he was in fact very upset and very jealous, and yes, over something so ridiculous).
“It doesn’t change the fact that this bastard touched what’s mine”, he was gritting his teeth.
“I wasn’t yours back then”, and you were pouring oil into the fire.
“Look, just because we didn’t know each other doesn’t mean you weren’t mine. You were always mine, you just didn’t know it. But that guy—”
You cut him off, “Alright”, and took the photo album from his lap, closing it shut and tucking it under your armpit. “We’re done looking at my childhood pictures”
“Why? Are there more guys holding your hand in there?”, he protested in a high-pitched voice.
“…”
“Oh my god?”, he cried out. “There are?”
Yes, there were. And if he kept looking, by the end of the day, he would turn into a mass murderer.
a/n: mind you, the rest of the pictures are all on friendly terms too, purely platonic. but better safe than sorry! AHAHAH
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acowardinmordor · 2 days ago
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I only had Steve repeating his senior year because I wanted the kids to know Eddie already, but thinking about it? This messes Steve up so so much more. He obviously met Robin, who asked a few pointed questions that made him go oh. about his life and his identity.
He’s back for another year in high school because of post concussion symptoms. His parents are probably pissed. He’s trying to rebuild his own sense of self without defining it with popularity, but he’s stuck in the place where he was the most popular before. And is now one of those loser super seniors.
Enter Eddie, who had been on Steve’s radar as a vague awareness of maybe-attraction in previous years. And the guy is protecting his kids. Encouraging them. He’s also as close to Out as he can be in Hawkins. He knows who he is. He’s unapologetic and doesn’t let trends define him. He’s who he wants to be. Of course there’s hearteyes.
But Steve isn’t comfortable with himself enough to talk to him directly. Hence the letters.
And maybe at first he wasn’t even sure that Eddie liked getting them. Or was even reading them. Probably wrote about how he was anonymous because he didn’t think Eddie would actually like him if he knew. It’s been a theme from the start, and it was probably the first thing that Eddie talked about when he could finally write back.
Eddie totally said that anyone who wrote letters like that, who was that kind and clever and generous and funny, would always be someone Eddie liked. Loved. That it wouldn’t matter if X was ugly, that it wouldn’t even matter if X was a girl. That Eddie would still want to know them.
And that’s when you have those insults. When Steve was finally finally brave enough to be around Eddie. To come to Hellfire. Because Eddie had promised in the letters to teach X how to play, that he’d be so so patient because X told him that he probably wasn’t smart enough to play.
Eddie has to betray everything he’s said.
And it is specifically because Steve Harrington is anathema to Eddie.
Proof that who Steve wants to be, tries to be, is wanted, but who he is in real life, not on paper, isn’t good enough.
(Yes, Robin had to be hugged into submission to keep her from slashing Eddie’s tires)
But, tag writer whose user name I can’t recall, Steve didn’t write his last letter in the car. He dropped off the boys, went home, and wrote something longer at first. He tried to find a way to explain to Eddie that he’s trying. That he wants to be a better person who Eddie would be happy to discover is X. He writes it, and he doesn’t believe that it will ever happen. That he can ever be better.
Anyway, Steve totally gets Vecna’d in this AU, and Eddie is one of the focal points.
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inlovewithpandora · 1 day ago
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ᥫ᭡ — Just a Pogue
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Artists — Rafe Cameron x fem!pogue!reader
Lyrics — Hearing Rafe belittle you to his friends and down play the bond you share leads you to your breaking point.
Music Advisory — Oneshot; all angst, hurt w/ no comfort, slight cursing, based heavily on scene(s) from season four
Duration — 1.7k
Words from Artist — This was a quick and fun fic to write for Rafe! It’s been a while since I wrote an angsty fic so I’m glad to have my toes in the water again, especially for Rafe because he pairs so good with angst! If you have any requests you want to see with Rafe please feel free to send them to my ask box! As always feel free to comment and reblog, I love reading y’all reactions! I hope you enjoy!!
Current Platforms — main m.list・obx taglist・navigation
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When Rafe sent you a text to meet him at the Country Club you were excited, hoping that since he’s asking you to come hang out with him and his friends that he’s finally ready to acknowledge what’s happening between you two. Your relationship has been without a label for a while now, sharing moments that are intimate, intense, and real, making you feel like there’s a true connection with Rafe and that he’ll be officially asking you to be his girlfriend soon.
As you walk from the patio to the inside of the club you see Rafe, Topper, and his girlfriend Ruthie. When you’re about to approach, you pause when you hear your name brought up in their conversation, making curiosity strike you and wonder what they're talking about so you move out of their line of sight but stay close enough so you can hear. “I’m surprised y/n’s your girlfriend.” Ruthie twirls the straw in her drink while looking over at Topper with a slight smirk on her face, purposefully testing the waters to see how Rafe will react. “I mean she’s pretty pogue, isn’t she?”
Rafe scoffs and rolls his eyes as if he finds this whole topic exhausting to talk about. “Listen,” he says with a blank face while shrugging his shoulders and lifting his glass closer to his lips, “just because we hook up doesn’t mean she’s my girlfriend, okay?” He mutters out before glancing around and taking a sip of his drink, clearly uncomfortable with the spotlight on his relationship with you— if you would even call it that. Mentioning your social class and insinuating that you’re his girlfriend makes Rafe feel insecure, especially since in the past he’s always expressed his strong dislike for pogues.
“Right… I’m just saying you sure are together a lot. Wait, has she moved in yet?”
“I’m not living with a pogue, I have standards.” Rafe felt the need to defend himself against this line of questioning and make it known that you’re strictly just a hookup for him, that there isn’t any type of love in his heart for you because you’re a pogue and he just can’t be with someone who’s living in the cut.
The sting of Rafe’s words hits you like a punch in the gut, unraveling every bit of hope you’d been holding onto. You feel knots in your stomach, your heart pounding as you back away, each cruel word echoing in your mind. To him, you’re just a fling—a fun thing he can call up whenever he wants, never someone he’d actually take seriously. All those moments, those stolen kisses and soft words you’d shared, they’d only been games to him. You thought that Rafe finally changed, that his views weren’t so surface level when it came to being a kook or a pogue but it’s clear that he only made you believe those things so he could get in your pants.
You turn and walk back toward your car, your mind reeling as you begin to feel stupid for allowing Rafe into your heart, trusting him with your body, only to find out he never truly cared about you as he claimed. You feel like you were lied to, knowing he feed you with words he knows you wanted to hear and would cling to just so he can get what he wanted out of you.
Over the next few days, Rafe tries to reach out to you, sending you numerous texts and calling your phone more times that you can count, causing each attempt to reignite the anger and pain you feel. He doesn’t know that you overheard his conversation with Ruthie and Topper, but you still ignore all his attempts to get in contact with you and you eventually block him, wanting him out of your life after what hearing what he said.
While you're home trying to take your mind off the whole situation you hear someone banging on your door, making you roll your eyes because whoever it is can’t be that determined to talk to you. When you open the door you see Rafe standing outside, looking at you with a look of confusion and underlying frustration. He doesn’t enjoy being ignored and he doesn’t understand why you’re being weird to him all of a sudden so he decided to pop up at your house and confront you. “Why the hell have you been ghosting me?”
You shake your head, trying to hold back the anger that flares inside you just from the sight of him. “Rafe, please leave me alone, okay? I blocked you for a reason, I don’t wanna talk to you.”
You try to shut the door, not wanting to continue a conversation with him but Rafe’s hand shoots out, stopping it from closing because he wants a more in depth explanation on why you’ve been ignoring him instead of the ‘half-assed’ one you just gave. He stares at you with narrowed eyes, clearly not used to being brushed off by you because since you started talking their hasn’t been a day where you deliberately ignored him. “What’s goin’ on with you? Did I do something?”
A bitter laugh leaves your lips before you allow the anger you feel to rise to the surface and let Rafe know exactly why you’ve been ignoring him. “Yeah, you did. Maybe it has something to do with you telling your friends I’m just a ‘hookup’ and that you’d never live with a pogue since you have so called ‘standards’.”
He blinks feeling thrown off, not seeing the connection in the meaning of your words and where they stem from. “Wait, what are you talking about?”
“I heard you at the club, Rafe!” You snap at him, the hurt you’ve been feeling over the past few days spilling over. “I heard you tell them that I’m just some Pogue you’re hooking up with, that I’m not your girlfriend, and that you’d never actually be with someone like me. Like I’m nothing!”
Rafe opens his mouth, struggling to find the right words, but you’re not interested in hearing whatever excuse he’s about to make because you know it’ll just be a lie. “I thought you were different, Rafe. I thought you actually saw me as more than that. But you just needed me to feel good about yourself for a while, right? You just liked having me around when you wanted a good fuck.”
“That’s not what I meant,” he protests, his voice pleading now. “I was just trying to… I don’t know, keep them off my back. They wouldn’t get it.”
You scoff while pinching the bridge of your nose, feeling a fresh wave of aggravation as you realize he really doesn’t get it. “And that’s the problem, Rafe. If you can’t respect me around your friends—if you’re embarrassed of what we have—then you never actually cared.”
He reaches out, trying to grab your hand, but you pull back and take a step away, not wanting to feel his touch after knowing his true feelings about you. “You made me feel like we had something,” you whisper, feeling the sting of tears but refusing to let them fall in front of him. “That we could be an actual couple but you played in my face, Rafe. You told me that you didn’t care that I was a pogue, that you wanted me with you but clearly it was bullshit.”
Rafe’s face shifts from guilt to desperation as he steps closer, his voice softening as he tries to clean up the mess he’s made. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? I was an fuckin’ idiot, and I shouldn’t have said that. I thought if I downplayed it, I could keep my friends from giving me shit about us.”
“So, you downplay me? Make me sound like I’m nothing to you just to avoid a little judgment? Do you fuckin’ hear yourself, Rafe? You didn’t just protect yourself—you tore me down in front of your friends.”
He looks away, clearly frustrated that his stupid words messed up things between the two of you but he pushes on, wanting to try and make things right. “I get it, okay? I messed up, but it doesn’t change how I feel. It’s just… complicated. You know I care about you.”
You scoff, feeling the weight of his words crushing you all over again. “Complicated? No, Rafe. It’s not complicated—it’s simple. You don’t respect me and you don’t care about me. You never did. And now you want to apologize and act like it’ll erase what you said and make everything better?” Rafe’s face twists with guilt, but his silence only fuels your anger. Every hurtful word he spoke replays in your mind, solidifying your resolve. “Too late, Rafe. You’ve already ruined it.”
He can tell that he’s losing you, that you’re emotionally pulling away from him so he starts pleading with you, not wanting to lose you. “I didn’t mean it. I’ll fix it. Just give me another chance—please.”
“No. You can’t fix it. It’s already done. You’ve made it clear who you are and how you feel about me. I’m not sticking around for whatever mess you’ve got going on in your head just so you can fuck me over again.”
His face falls, his frustration turning into panic. “Please, just let me explain—”
“I don’t want to hear anymore, Rafe.” You feel a finality in your mind and a final piece of your heart closing off, deciding not to fall into the trap of Rafe’s words again, knowing that if you do you’ll only hurt your future self when he fucks up again. “I’m not waiting around for you to figure your shit out. I’m done.”
When Rafe is face to face with the door he stands in place frozen, while his heart is hammering inside his chest. The sharp echo of the door slamming reverberates in his ears, a bitter reminder of how badly he’s screwed things up. For a moment, he’s too stunned to move, his mind reeling from the weight of your words and the way you just ended what you had with him.
A deep frustration churns inside him, mingled with guilt and regret. He never thought it would get to this point. He didn’t expect you to shut him out so completely. He knows that he hurt you, but hearing the door slam was like a slap to the face, a loud confirmation that he had lost you. Rafe knows, deep down, that he’s crossed a line he can’t uncross, that it’ll be hard for you to forgive him when the things he said were so harsh.
The realization that his actions have pushed you too far away hits him hard. His chest tightens as the panic sets in, his mind racing with how to fix things, ways of how to make you forgive him, but nothing comes to him. The words “I’m sorry” feel hollow, like a cheap way out. He’s played this game before, but now it feels different. You’re different.
He steps back slowly and walks to his car with his head hanging down, looking back at the door with a mixture of frustration and sorrow. He never meant to hurt you, to make you feel less than but the damage is already done. And now, with you shutting him out, he has no idea if he can ever make things right, if he can ever win his sweet pogue back.
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ruewrote · 1 day ago
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𝑐𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑑.
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PAIRING: evan buckley x fem!reader WARNINGS: no use of y/n GENRE: fluff, meet cute SONG INSPIRATION: tadow by masego WORD COUNT: 938
navigation | ask | evan buckley masterlist
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you were new to the 118.
from the moment you stepped into the station, they had welcomed you with open arms. chimney took you under his wing, showing you the ropes with his humour that helped keep the nerves at bay.
hen had this way of grounding you, offering advice that made you feel like you weren’t just learning the job, but learning to trust yourself.
sure, you’d had a couple of minor slip-ups during your first rescues. nothing too dangerous, but enough to sting your pride. you’d quickly learned from your mistakes, and the team had noticed. they always made it clear you weren’t alone, encouraging you as you found your footing.
as your first month passed, you began to feel like you were truly part of the family. but there was one name that kept coming up, like a shadow you couldn’t quite pin down, evan buckley.
whether it was on the ride back to the station or during meals around the table, his name was always on someone’s lips.
“remember when buck–” “oh my god, and then buck said–” “i still can’t believe buck actually–”
from the stories, he sounded like their long lost annoying younger brother, ruthlessly teased but fiercely loved. he was the kind of person who could drive them up the wall one minute and have them laughing until they cried the next.
with each story, you found yourself forming a mental image of him. this larger-than-life, chaotic force of nature who somehow managed to be their glue. without even meeting him, you felt like you already knew him.
and then, one day, you did.
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you were cleaning and restocking one of the ambulances, focused on the methodical rhythm of your work. the sound of cheers outside pulled your attention, distant at first but growing louder, accompanied by bursts of laughter.
curiosity got the better of you. you closed the ambulance doors with a firm slam and started toward the commotion, your steps quickening with each cheer.
as you rounded the corner, you stopped in your tracks. the entire team had gathered in a loose circle, their voices raised in excitement, their faces lit up with the kind of joy reserved for reunions.
in the middle of it all stood a mountain of a man.
chim was the first to spot you lingering at the back of the group. “hey!” he called out, his grin widening as he reached for you, tugging you forward. “c’mon, don’t be shy! you’ve got to meet him!”
you stumbled slightly as you were pulled to the front, your breath hitching the moment your eyes landed on him.
he was everything the stories hadn’t prepared you for.
tall and broad shouldered, his uniform stretched taut over muscles that seemed almost unfairly large. his hair was slightly tousled, the golden strands catching the sunlight, but it was his smile that truly knocked the air out of your lungs. warm and open, it softened his chiselled features and sent a rush of heat straight up your neck.
then his eyes met yours.
blue. so blue they seemed to pull you in, almost as if the world had narrowed to just the two of you in that moment.
chim’s voice broke through your daze. “and this,” he said with a teasing grin, gesturing toward you, “is your new replacement!”
you rolled your eyes playfully, trying to ignore the way your heart raced as buck’s gaze lingered on you.
“replacement, huh?” buck chuckled, “i’ve heard i left them in good hands.”
he extended a hand toward you, and for a split second, you just stared at it, your brain short circuiting. then, as if on autopilot, you took it.
the moment his hand closed around yours, you felt it. a warmth spread through you, starting at your palm and radiating outward. his hand was large and strong, but his grip was gentle, as though he didn’t wanna hurt you.
“yeah…” you managed, your voice softer than you intended. “you could say that.”
You give him your name, his lips curve into a gentle smile. He nods, his eyes never leaving yours. "pretty."
your hand stayed in his for a beat too long, neither of you seeming eager to let go. his thumb brushed against your skin, an unconscious movement that sent shivers down your spine.
the world around you blurred. all you could see was him. the way his uniform hugged his frame, the way the corners of his mouth quirked up as he smiled at you, the way his eyes softened.
then, as if realising himself, buck gave your hand one final squeeze before letting go, his own hesitation mirrored in the slight reluctance of your fingers.
the moment broke before you could process what had just happened, someone called his name from across the station, and he was ushered away, leaving with the crowd and disappearing through one of the doors. his laughter echoed faintly as he went, but not before his eyes flicked back to you, lingering for a moment longer than they should have.
you turned quickly, your face burning. you took a step back and mouthed silently to yourself, “oh. my. god.”
“catch your breath yet?” bobby’s voice startled you, low and amused.
your head snapped toward him, but the knowing look in his eyes said it all. he’d seen the whole thing.
you tried to play it cool, clearing your throat and turning back to the ambulance as if you had work to do. but your heart was still racing, your hand tingling from where his touch had lingered.
little did you know, buck was feeling the same thing, standing in the middle of his family with his thoughts entirely consumed by you.
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comments and reblogs are appreciated ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
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© ruewrote 2024.
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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 day ago
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Chapter 5- Miles Between Us
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Summary: Frankie's decision to join the Army was the catalyst in the collapse of your friendship. When he's forced to reconcile with his past, packed away in boxes in his childhood basement, he finds pieces of you in everything he's left behind.
Word Count: 5.0K
Pairing: Frankie Morales x f!reader (reader has a name/nickname)
Warnings: Angst, lying, guilt, military deployment, FEELINGS, Frankie's mom not putting up with his shit
A/N: IT'S TIME TO PEEL BACK ANOTHER LAYER OF THE ONION, BABY!!! I hope you guys don't hate me that this is a slow burn- I know this is not how I normally write at all, but it's been really fun to build this story up bit by bit (if you hate it though, please tell me lmao 💀) I'm excited for this chapter and how it hints at next chapter (we're finally getting to some smut y'all, omg) Thank you as always for your kind words, it makes my day to hear what you have to say about these two 🥺💛
All The Things We Never Said Masterlist
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You, Age 17, Spring of 2006
“You’re late, Morales.” 
“Can’t be late to something we don’t have a set time for, Anderson.” 
It’s true, you and Frankie have never set an official schedule for your afterschool ritual, but it never seems to fail that at 3:45, only 10 minutes after you’ve gotten home from soccer practice,  he’s at the foot of your bed with his forest green Jansport backpack, ready to complain about the homework he doesn’t want to finish and the tests he has no interest in studying for, just so he can keep you company while you stress yourself to death about the same assignments. 
And for as much as he hated school work, Frankie was never late. Never. So to watch him mope into your bedroom an hour later than his usual arrival time, it almost would have been safer to assume he was dead than anything else. 
“What took you so long? Get lost on the way here?” You joke, trying to keep it light while still prodding for an answer about his absence as you write down the answer to the math equation you’re trying to solve. 
“No. Don’t worry about it.” 
There’s been very few occasions you’ve seen Frankie so stoic. Even on his worst days, he’s at least still got a little tolerance left in him for your stupid banter. It’s enough to draw your attention completely away from your homework and onto him. 
“What’s wrong? Why are you being so weird?” 
You can tell then that something’s clearly not right, the way he’s angrily yanking loose papers and textbooks from his backpack and nearly slamming them onto the edge of your bed, making you gnaw anxiously at the end of your pencil you’d been using. 
You’re too nosy for your own good to let up until you find what you’re looking for. 
“Nothing’s wrong.” 
“Well obviously something’s wrong.” 
“What? I’m not allowed to be late, ever?” 
“No? Frankie, I just asked where you were and you’re acting like I’m asking you if you just shot the fucking president or something. What’s going on?” 
“It’s nothing, MacKenzie!”
“If it’s nothing, then why are you so upset about it?” 
“I’m not upset!” 
“You clearly are? Frankie, what the hell are you-” 
“I’m joining the Army, okay?!”
Out of all the things you could have expected to come out of Frankie’s mouth, that would have been at the bottom of your list. In fact, it’s so out of left field, you’re not even quite sure you believe him. 
Your forehead hurts from how tightly your brows are knitted together in confusion, scowling at Frankie with a dumbfounded intensity that probably had you looking like you had just gotten an unsuspecting whiff of the world’s most sour lemon. 
There’s no way he’s being serious. He can’t be. 
“Ha ha, very funny, Francisco.” You mock, frown still splayed across your face, “Now will you please tell me what’s actually going on?” 
His silence makes your heart drop into the pit of your stomach. You can feel the way your face falls, the muscles once tensed in adamant skepticism now sinking into a quiet panic. You can hear each breath as it flows in through your nose and out through your mouth, blood pounding louder and louder in your ears with each pulse of your veins. 
“Frankie, if this is one of your stupid jokes, it’s not funny.” 
“It’s not a joke.” 
His eyes are still peeled to the floor, too afraid to bring himself to look at you. All he can do is stare at his pinky toe, poking out of the hole in his socks that he refuses to replace. You wait for what feels like hours, days, for him to say something, but his silence is deafening. And the sound of Frankie’s silence is the scariest thing you’ve heard in a very long time. 
It’s so terrifying, the only thing you can do to cope is fill the quiet void with your rambling and pray that Frankie Morales is choosing to play the world’s worst joke on you. 
“What- what do you mean? Frankie, I thought- When you and Santi talked about doing the same thing as Will- I thought you were fucking kidding? What about college? We already both got accepted to Florida State, what are you gonna do-” 
“I didn’t get in.” 
Please let him be kidding. Please, please, let this be a sick joke. 
You can feel your confusion starting to bubble into anger, jaw clenching at the way Frankie’s too coward to even look in your general direction, gaze still glued to that stupid fucking hole in his worn down sock. 
“Frankie, what the fuck? We both got accepted back in January? You’ve been lying to me this whole fucking time?” 
“I didn’t wanna lie, okay?!” 
He’s riddled with enough guilt to speak up, trying to keep himself from the brink of tears as he works up enough courage to finally look you in the face. You can hear how hard he gulps, like his heart is bobbing in his throat, trying to buy all the time he can to come up with a reason for his deception that won’t hurt you any more than he already has. 
“I just- fuck,” he sighs, chewing at his bottom and bouncing his leg against the bed so intensely it’ll make him sore the next day, “I didn’t know what to do, Kenz. I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry.” 
It’s hard to stay mad at him when you know he means it. It’d be easier if it weren’t for the way his brown eyes flooded with disappointment in himself, spilling out in tears onto his cheeks. For as frustrated as you are, you have enough sympathy to ease up on him enough to at least try to understand. 
“Well, not lying to me about it for the last four months probably would have been a good start.” You huff, the air that puffs from your nostrils still tainted with the let down you’re trying so hard to not let override your conversation. 
You can’t help but let yourself find a spot next to him on the edge of your bed, a peace offering that you hope is enough to signal to him you’re willing to listen to what he has to say. 
“I- I didn’t think you were being serious when you and Santi were talking about it. I- I thought you- I thought the plan was to go to Florida State. Together. What happened, Frankie?” 
It’s quiet for a few more moments. Frankie takes a few, slow deep breaths as he runs his hands through the curls twisting at the nape of his neck. The silence isn’t as bitter as before, but it stings enough to gnaw at the edges of your nails, the anxious habit you can’t seem to break, and certainly have no intention of giving up right now.  
“Stop chewing at your nails, Kenz. You’re gonna be pissed at yourself later.” Frankie sighs, gently grabbing your wrist to pull your hand away from your mouth, trying to fulfill his duty of being the one to stop you from ripping your nail beds to shreds. 
“You’re kinda making it hard not to.” You try your best to attempt a laugh. It’s the only way to keep yourself from crying. “So are you gonna tell me what’s going on or what?” 
“Y-yeah.” Frankie re-adjusts himself on the edge of the bed, twisting the fabric of your comforter between his fingers, trying to ground himself in the reality of the truth he’s forced to tell you, “I- I didn’t get into Florida State. I told you I did because I didn’t know what I was gonna do. You were just so excited when you thought we both got in and I- I panicked and I lied. I didn’t even think I was gonna get in anyways. I didn’t think I was gonna get in anywhere. Even if I did, I don’t know if I even could have afforded it. It’s just me and my mom and neither of us-”
“It’s not too late. I can help you look for scholarships. To help you with tuition. I’m sure that there’s a bunch out there that you could apply for. I’ll even write your essays and stuff for you if you want me to-” 
“I’m pretty sure you can’t do that, Kenz. Plus, you hate cheaters.” 
Frankie tries to reciprocate the same half-assed laugh you gave him. He looks over at you, the small smile he’s forcing to keep between his lips quickly fading as he sees the way you’re pleading with him to realize that you would forge a thousand essays in his name if it meant he wasn’t going to leave you. He’d be a cheater you’d gladly forgive. 
“It’s not even just the money. I just- I- I don’t even like school, Kenzie. I suck at it. If school is already hard now, how much harder is it gonna be when I get to college? To study for a job that I’m probably not even gonna want when I graduate? At least with the Army I can have a job and benefits and hopefully make enough money to help my mom so she’s not working at the hospital 6 days a week. MacKenzie, the only reason I applied to Florida State was because of you. I thought that maybe there would be some miracle I got in and I could figure out how to pay for it and I could magically get smarter and better at school so we could spend the next four years together. I wanted it to happen. I wanted it to happen so bad. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I lied to you. I just- fuck- I just didn’t know how to tell you.” 
Neither of you are quite sure what to say next. That quiet comes back to fill the space between you, allowing enough room for the silent sobs you’re both trying your best to hold in, small sniffles still escaping from each of you. You’re not sure if your brain has fully processed what he’s had to say. The only thing you can understand is the swirling of sadness and confusion in your gut and the pounding ache in your chest. 
You take a scooch closer to him, the outsides of your thighs barely brushing together as you tilt your head to rest against his shoulder. It’s heavy, the weight you can’t help but lean against him, but the arm he wraps behind your back and around your waist tells you that he’ll gladly take it. He’ll take it all, if he has to. 
“Did you already sign a contract to go?” The whisper of your words is so soft, like you’re hoping he can’t hear you. If he can’t hear you, then he doesn’t have to tell you the answer you don’t want to hear. 
“Yeah. Me and Santi did a few weeks ago.” His voice is almost quieter than yours, convinced he has the same idea as you. 
His truth stings worse than the lie he’s been masquerading behind the past four months. You want to scream at him- To curse him with shouts and sobs, question how he could make this choice for himself and leave you in the dark until it’s too late for you to change his mind. You know it’s selfish, the way you want him to stay, the way you would have fought with every bone in your body to keep him from leaving. You know it’s the reason Frankie couldn’t tell you. 
It’s the same reason why Frankie couldn’t bring himself to tell you that if he had given you that chance, he probably would have stayed. 
“Do um- do you know when you have to leave?” 
It hurts to hear the words come out of your mouth. It’s an admittance of defeat. Because once you ask that question, there’s nothing you can do or say that will make him stay. No fighting, no begging, no pleading. You have to accept he’s leaving. 
“Not ‘til the end of the summer.” 
“Where?” 
The more you ask, the more it makes you want to keel over the edge of the bed and vomit, the reality of it all setting in at an alarming pace. 
“Missouri for basic training. I don’t know where after.” 
He doesn’t have to say where. You both know. Even if he doesn’t know the exact longitude and latitude of where the Army will deploy him, there’s nowhere else they’re sending him besides Iraq or Afghanistan or whatever godforsaken, war ridden country in the Middle East he’ll be forced to put his life on the line for. 
And for how much the reality of Frankie leaving scares you, when you’re hit with the reality that Frankie may leave and never come back, you’re absolutely terrified. 
“I don’t want you to go, Frankie.” 
You can’t beg him to stay. There’s no amount of bargaining you can do with him or the powers that be to change what’s been done. All you can do is tell him your truth as you sob into his chest while he holds you. Maybe if you’re not enough to make him stay, you’re at least enough to make him want to come home. 
You’re not sure how long he holds you while you cry. Maybe it’s minutes, maybe it’s hours. However long it is, all the moments you have left with Frankie feel that much more precious. You won’t let any of them slip through your fingers. 
“You promise you’ll come home, right?” 
“I promise, MacKenzie. I promise.” 
If there’s one thing you’ve learned about Francisco Morales, it’s that he’ll never break a promise. You just hope the universe is kind enough to let him keep this one, too. 
“I promise that we’ll have a really fun summer together before I leave too, okay? Whatever you wanna do, Kenz, I’ll do it.” 
“Anything?” 
It’s enough to peek your head out from the crook of his neck, trying your best to wipe away your tears with your sleeve, like you hadn’t just stained the better part of Frankie’s sweatshirt with the same wetness. 
“Anything.” 
“Alright, well, I guess we’re gonna go to Dairy Queen and get an extra large blizzard every day until you’re too fat for the Army to want you anymore.” 
The two of you giggle, a quiet symphony of soft snorts and sobs at the idea of rolling an ice cream filled Frankie off to boot camp. It makes him laugh even harder that he wouldn’t put it past you if you really did try. Perhaps it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if you did. 
“Whatever you want, MacKenzie. I’m all yours.” 
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Frankie, Present 
Frankie’s convinced he might as well start training for a marathon at this point. 
He’s not really sure how else to spend his time. It’s hard to keep himself occupied when all he can do at home is sit around and wait for your dad to die or stare out the window like a creep to watch your comings and goings. 
At least if he’s running, he can’t think about you. 
Well, he can’t think about you as much. 
It’s been a day and a half since he decided to follow you on your run. He’s already pushed his luck enough that you didn’t damn near kill him for it, let alone that you even gave him a chance to talk to him. 
He let you take the first  shift on the morning yesterday, despite the fact he’d been awake well before the sun rose. The irony wasn’t lost on him at the way he watched you through his bedroom window the same way he did most Saturday and Sunday mornings for the first few years of your friendship. You’d be up at the same ungodly hour as him, except you’d be pacing up and down your driveway, stretching and lunging across its length as you clicked around on the iPod wrapped around your forearm, searching for whatever song would pump you up for your run. 
It wasn’t until you had finally noticed Frankie peering out his bedroom window every weekend that you began to drag him along on your runs with you. 
“If you’re awake too, you might as well come running with me, Morales. It’ll be fun!” 
“Fine. I gotta warn you though, Kenz, I am actually pretty fast.” 
“You barely run the mile in gym class.” 
“Savin’ up all my energy for when I need it most, Anderson.” 
There was once a time where you would have to beg Frankie to come with you on a run. Now, he’d give anything for you to tolerate his existence ten feet behind you. 
But he’ll sacrifice another run alone through all too familiar roads of his childhood subdivision if it helps him kill time and keeps you from hating him anymore than you rightfully deserve to. 
Yesterday, he went on two runs to pass the time. Hell, today, he’d consider adding a third run to his underwhelming schedule just to keep himself busy. Fortunately, (or unfortunately, he can’t tell yet) for him, Maria Morales has other plans. 
And when Maria Morales has plans, it’s in Frankie’s best interest to drop anything else he had in mind for the day. 
Even when it means he’s got a hot date with his basement and a mountain full of boxes in his basement. 
“Okay, anything in this pile to the left is for you to go through.” His mom grunts, lifting up one last box to add to the heap labeled “Francisco’s things” in her perfectly curved cursive, “If you want to take it home, find an empty box to put it in, but not my new clear, plastic bins, entiendes (understand)? Those were expensive.” 
“No clear plastic bins, got it.” Frankie chuckles, following the exaggerated step his mother takes over his scattered belongings. 
“If you see something and you don’t want it now but you want me to keep it for later, you can put it over on the shelf by the stairs. If you think it’s basura (trash), leave it over here and let me look at it first before you throw it away.” 
“Comprendido (got it).” Frankie nods, sizing up the stack his mom has set out for him, “Jesus ma, this is gonna take me all morning to go through.” 
“If you were home more, there would be less things to go through now.” 
“Yeah, well, you got me there.” Frankie grumbles under his breath, grimacing at the harsh reality of his mom’s words. He knows isn’t meant completely out of malice, but he can’t deny it’s certainly got some truth to it as well.  
“Okay, well I need to go run some errands, and I want this pile sorted by the end of the day, so standing here and moping certainly isn’t going to help that. Get to work, mijo (son).” 
His mom will never be one to throw a pity party for anyone, and most definitely won’t be throwing one for her son, based on his own, self-inflicted problem. Frankie helps her step over another makeshift pile scattered for sorting across the basement floor, giving him a quick pat on the back before disappearing upstairs, leaving him to quite literally unpack his past. 
“Fuck. Okay.” He sighs to himself, gently kicking one of the edges of flimsy cardboard at the bottom of the tower, trying to formulate his best plan of attack to make his sorting as painless as possible. 
He’s thankful that his brain has always worked in a way that allows him to analyze things so quickly, doing some quiet calculations in his head as to the most effective and efficient way to sort through god knows what may be hidden in the pile his mom has created for him. 
He runs his hand through the still messy curls of his morning bed head before selecting what feels like the lightest boxes and moving them off to the side, opening up a cardboard container from the next layer. 
Besides the trophies still in his room, every prize he’d ever won for every sport he’d ever played sits in the box below him. Frankie chuckles to himself, picking up some from the top to examine them, thumb gliding over the fake gold plating to read plaques like “Florida Junior Divisional Freestyle Swimming Finalist- 2005” or “Regional Championship Winners- Florida Firebirds 2007” glued to poorly sculpted plastic statues of swimmers. A few more medals and certificates had sunk to the bottom of the box, Frankie quickly grazing through its contents before rehoming it to the “trash” pile, unsure of when he would ever need proof he won several swimming competitions in high school. 
The next few boxes were more of the same- His varsity jacket, old t-shirts he wouldn’t stand a chance fitting into, considering the gangly figure that stretched them more than a decade ago, some old books from high school he’d only kept because of how much you loved them and he promised you that one day, he’d read them, too. 
It’s the shoe box that catches his eye next, sure that no matter how much his mom loved to hoard, whatever was in there most definitely was not a raggedy, holy pair of Converse from high school. 
It’s not until he picks up the box that he knows exactly what’s inside. It’s one of the lightest things he’s picked up in the last hour, but when he knows the weight of its contents, his arms want to tremble. 
It’s with a long deep breath that he brings the shoebox over to an open patch of floor, letting out a grunt and cursing his knees as he sits down cross legged with the box in front of him. He gently flips open the lid, hand running over his face and down the back of his neck when his suspicions are confirmed. 
Open envelopes spill out over the edges of the worn cardboard, the box stuffed to the brim with every letter you’d ever written to him while he was away.
Even if he wanted to, he’s not sure he could ever physically bring himself to throw them out. Those letters have more miles on them than most people’s cars will ever reach in a lifetime, flimsy, stamped pieces of paper following him to every corner of the globe he’s traveled to. 
Some letters he’s read so much, they’re worn on the edges where he’s held the paper, smudging the pen that’s reached the sides of the pages. Others, he’s only read once. He’s not sure he could ever bring himself to read them again. But regardless of their contents, he’d made a promise to you they’d stay with him. 
“Better not get rid of those letters, Morales. Do you know how many hand cramps I’ve given myself trying to find the words to send halfway across the world to you? You better promise me you’ll keep ‘em.”  
His commitment to the folded pieces of paper ring in his ears as his fingers drag across the tops of the open envelopes. He can’t help the way his index finger and thumb pinch the paper below his grasp, carefully tugging a random letter out of its shoebox storage. 
It’s a gut wrenching gamble, the game he’s about to play, a roulette of making his heart ache from joy or pain depending on the one he chooses to pull. He’s already placed his bet as he pulls the lined piece of paper out of the envelope- He’s not getting the money he’s already placed on the table back, so he might as well pray he makes a return on his investment. 
With one more deep breath, he unfolds the tri-fold creases, ready to watch his bet play out before him. 
August 18th, 2006
Frankie, 
I hope I sent this letter to the right place! I looked on the website and it said to send mail to new recruits (that’s you, Morales), to this address, so no one better be holding my letter to you hostage. 
Anyways, how’s training so far? Did they make you shave your head yet? I hope not. I’m not sure why the Army insists on making you all look like Dr. Evil from Austin Powers. I’m sure you’ll still look cute even with short hair! I don’t think I can say the same for Santi, but you didn’t hear that from me… hehehe 
I just moved into my dorm yesterday! My roommate seems pretty nice. Her name is Jessica and she’s from Georgia. She claims that she’s neat and she better be, or I may lose my mind. I’ll send you pictures of my dorm once it’s all set up! It’s kind of a mess right now, but I made sure to put the picture of us from prom up on my desk :)
I don’t start class until next Tuesday. Hopefully I’ll meet some new people in my dorm or on the soccer team so I’m not a total loser with no friends. LOL. 
Have you met anyone new yet? I can’t wait to hear all about your new Army friends! I already started a countdown calendar until we can see each other again. Only 70 days until basic training is done and I can hear about everything in person! 
I miss you a lot. I know that’s dumb to say because it’s only been a week, but still. I wish I would have kissed you again before you got on the plane to leave. I promise I will when I see you. Nothing says perfect place to kiss like South Missouri, romance capital of the USA (haha). 
I know you’re gonna be busy, but write me back when you have time. The return address on the envelope is my dorm address, so use that, or risk Doug and Michelle reading your mail if you send it to my house!!! I can’t wait to hear from you. Miss you, weirdo. 
From, 
Kenz :) <3
His luck of the draw sends a wave of relief through him, smiling down at the curvy loops of your perfectly neat printing signed at the bottom of the page. It makes his heart skip a beat, the same kind of butterflies coming to life in his stomach as they did the first time he read it. He’s earned his money back and then some. He gets how casinos never go broke, because the high of good fortune is enough to have him reaching back into the box to put another gamble on the line. 
October 13th, 2009
Frankie, 
I always feel dumb sending multiple letters before I hear back from you, but you know me, I love to worry. I know you can’t tell me where you are right now (stupid military and their secrets for the safety of society lol) but I’ve been seeing stuff on the news and it makes me scared for you. I just hope wherever you are, you’re safe. 
My dad’s cancer is back. He’s been in the hospital for almost two weeks now. They found a new mass on his liver, but they said hopefully they can target it with radiation before it starts to spread. Cassandra at the front desk asked how you were when I was at the hospital yesterday. I said that you were good. I think she’s only asking because if you’re not there, there’s no one to keep me from burning a hole in the waiting room carpet. 
I wish you were here. I feel really lost right now. I just know if you were here, you’d find a way to make everything better. You always do. 
Sorry this letter isn’t longer. I haven’t been sleeping that great and don’t have enough brainpower to write something decent. Just wanted to let you know what’s going on.  
Counting down the days until you make good on your promise. I hope you come home soon, Frankie. 
Kenzie 
He curses himself for an unlucky draw, heart sinking at the tear stains smearing the blue ink of your trembling letters. An overwhelming wave of guilt washes over him, vivid memories of reading your notes in his bunk alone, wishing there was a way he could fly halfway around the world for a night just to hold you and tell you that everything was going to be okay. 
It’s the addictive itch in the back of his brain that makes him decide to pull one more letter from the box, taking one last gamble to see if he can prove the nagging pit in his stomach to quit while he’s ahead, wrong. 
February 4th, 2011
Hey, 
If you don’t want to write anymore, that’s fine. I was trying to be friendly, but clearly you don’t really care. Just let me know and I’ll stop bombarding you with mail you obviously don’t want. Or I guess you not responding is letting me know. If you want to send anything back you can send it to my parents house. I’m moving into Liam’s house and it’s only 20 minutes away so I can just drive there and pick it up. No need to send you a new address you probably aren’t going to write to, anyways. 
I guess I’ll see you when I see you. 
MacKenzie 
And that’s how Vegas will always stay in business. 
Because now Frankie is forced to walk away, all his money stolen from him at the stupid risk he’s decided to take. The one letter he’d give anything not to read again is the one he had to pull. 
Heat seethes in his chest- he can’t quite explain why. Because he lost at a rigged game he’d set up for himself? That he still hasn’t quite come to terms with the ugly truth of what he put the both of you through? That he wishes with everything in him, he could go back and change what he’s done? 
Or maybe, it’s because now might be the last chance he has to fix what he’s broken, and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to live with himself if he can’t.
He leaves the pile in the basement unfinished, shoes barely tied to his feet before he bursts out the door in a sprint.
He's not sure where he's going. He's not even sure how long he's run for. All he knows is the pounding of his feet against the pavement, trying to outrun the stupid decisions of his past.
He tells himself if he runs fast enough, he'll beat them.
If he goes far enough, they'll be forgotten.
If he outraces them, you'll be there waiting for him at the finish line.
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142 notes · View notes
illbegottenfaith · 2 days ago
Text
handwritten - theo nott x reader
yours and theo’s story as told through notes passed in class
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a/n - came up with this quick idea to release some pent up creative energy while mulling over lucky pt 3. will prob make this an ongoing series for small ideas I can’t get fully fledged fics out of. easy to write, easy to read, enjoy!
tropes/warnings - fluff, a minor hinting at angst, newstudent!theo, estranged friends to lovers
word count - 1.5k
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Monday, 10.07 am, Charms
Hey. You might want to pull your nose out of that disgusting textbook for once.
We’ve been over this. Just because you don’t understand something it doesn’t mean it’s disgusting. It’s very disrespectful.
What is disrespectful is you not paying attention to our year’s hottest new commodity - emphasis on the hot. I must say, he fills out that uniform quite nicely.
I’m sure he does.
C’mon, you’re not even a little bit curious? Just a peek?
Y/N? Hellooooooo? 
Oh my god. I know the guy.
???
What is he doing here? Last I heard he was being homeschooled.
Know him how??
We went to the same primary school. We were…friends.
Riiiight.
Don’t get any ideas. I haven’t seen him since I was ten. And he looked very, very different back then. Had a ratty sort of face. I can still kind of see it, actually.
Oh, Y/N, how could you say such awful things about his beautiful face! Oh dear, that bone structure…
Quiet, you. He’s really…grown. He’s so much taller now.
You know what you should do? You should offer to help him catch up.
On five years of school?
Oh, please, he was homeschooled. He had to have learnt some things. Who is he, anyway?
Theodore Nott.
Now that’s an Old Money name if I ever heard one.
Ivy. Be nice.
So? Is he? Old money, that is.
I…suppose so.
Are you sure you two were friends?
Yes. It’s been a while, that’s all. I just…wow. I can’t believe he’s here. Like, right there. I didn’t know if I’d ever see him again.
What happened?
He moved. I was starting at Hogwarts. We lost touch, it happens.
But now he’s back! Yay! Did you see those sinfully blue eyes of his?
Ivy, you have a boyfriend.
I know. Ivan agrees, by the way.
That he’s hot?
Yes.
He’s sitting on the other side of the room. When did you have time to discuss this??
Just now. Right in front of you. What did you think all that eyebrow-waggling was about?
I thought you were having a stroke. Merlin, the two of you are perfect for each other.
Don’t change the subject. He’s not gay, is he? Your friend? All the hot ones usually are.
I wouldn’t know, now, would I? I haven’t heard anything about him in years. Ivy, leave him alone. Please don’t harass the poor guy, sexually or otherwise. And quit it with the notes. He’ll notice.
How??? Has he got eyes on the back of his very nicely shaped head? He’s busy with Flitwick anyway.
Trust me, he’ll see. Nothing gets past Theodore Nott.
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Monday, 2.15 pm, Potions
Well?????
Well, what?
The chat!!! Your chat!!!!!! With Mr. Theodore Nott!!!!!!!!
You have to quit it with the caffeine. You’re far too excitable after lunch.
The chat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was fine. It was…nice.
Uh-huh.
He goes by Theo now.
Okay. I’ll pretend I care about that.
It was all very casual, very superficial. It was really just us exchanging pleasantries. Oh, right. He asked me to accompany him to Quidditch tryouts.
You??? But you hate Quidditch.
I know.
Please tell me you didn’t say that.
I didn't. I just said I didn’t know much about it.
And?
He said that didn’t matter. He just wanted me there for moral support.
Then what was with all the turning red halfway through? You looked like you were going to combust.
Was it that obvious?
Ivan had some pumpkin juice ready, just in case.
It was nothing. I just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all. He called me his good luck charm.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You’re going to rip a hole through the parchment.
AWWWWW
So?? Did you say yes??
I said I’d think about it.
BOOOOOOOO
Come on, Vee. He’s been flying since before he could walk. He always talked about joining the big leagues, you know. He knows everything there is to know about Quidditch, so of course he’ll make the team. And it’ll have nothing to do with me.
But he doesn’t even have any friends yet :(
That’s because he hasn’t talked to anyone yet.
Y’know, Romilda Vane wanted to know why he was talking to you of all people.
What’s that supposed to mean??
Eh, you know. You can be a little…snippy.
I am NOT snippy.
There it is. The snippiness.
Whatever. It’s all so pointless. Come Thursday evening, he’ll have joined the Quidditch team and he’ll be hanging out with, y’know, those people, and we’ll be ancient history. He’ll make plenty of friends. He just doesn’t know it yet.
Okay. If you say so. Also, at lunch, I finally tried that thing you’re always talking about, “applying myself,” and I found this article on his dad in the library. From 6 years ago.
Don’t you want to know what the article said?
You could have mentioned he was a death eater, you know.
I don’t care about that, by the way. You used to be friends and that’s good enough for me. But, Y/N, he was arrested six years ago. And you haven’t talked to Theo in six years. But there isn’t any kind of connection between those, is there?
Y/N?
Do not make me throw this at you. I know how you feel about paper cuts.
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Tuesday, 3.03 pm, Defence Against the Dark Arts
Where’s your friend?
?
You know. Who you’re always passing notes with in class?
You noticed?
Hard not to. It makes you all fidgety and annoyed.
Yeah, well, Ivy’s an annoying person.
I’ll take your word for it. What do you have after this?
Transfiguration.
Wow. That’s one of the harder ones, isn’t it?
Er, depends on who you ask, I think.
Still brilliant as ever, then.
Shut up. I’m not half the swot I was in primary school. 
I never thought you were a swot. You were just…enthusiastic.
That’s sweet of you to say, Theo.
Huh. I thought I’d always be Teddy to you.
We’re not ten anymore, Theo. I can say your name perfectly now.
That’s good. So, have you thought about it?
Thought about what?
The Quidditch tryouts. You’re the only person I know here so you have to say yes.
I don’t know. Some of the girls look pretty interested in getting to know you.
What?
Nothing. I guess I could swing by for a short while.
That’s my girl.
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Thursday, 8.37 pm, Common Room
SO?????
He got in. Obviously. Was there ever any doubt?
Did he run up to you? Did he hug you? Did he pick you up and spin you around???
Witch Weekly is a bad influence on you.
Details, please.
He hugged me. Kind of. Nearly tackled me, he was so excited.
you are SO his good luck charm!!!!!!
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Friday, 11.17 am, Defence Against the Dark Arts
Witch Weekly?
It’s not mine. I’m holding it for a friend.
Right.
Really, I am. Ivy’s a fiend for these but she has this Charms test coming up that she absolutely cannot fail.
I believe you. ‘Top 6 Magical Contraceptives for the Modern Witch’ doesn’t sound like your kind of reading material.
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I was only having a little fun.
I’m not embarrassed. Are you embarrassed?
Erm, no, but you’re very red. Do you need to see the Healer?
I’m fine. It’s just hot. And no one calls Madam Pomfrey ‘the Healer,’ by the way.
Ah. I see.
Is there a point to all this? Did you need to ask something?
Oh, right. What are you up to on Saturday night?
Saturday? Dunno…wanted to take a crack at that Transfiguration essay.
Excellent. I’ll pick you up at 8.
Oh?
It’s nothing. A couple of the guys on the team wanted to celebrate with drinks at Hogsmeade. Everyone’s bringing someone, and I thought it would be nice if you came. Being my good luck charm, and all.
Oh, Theo, you probably don’t know this since you’re new and all, but going down to Hogsmeade is only permissible on certain weekends. And only start a couple of weeks into the term, so not yet.
Did you just -? Oh my god, you did. You laughed at me. You laughed at my note. Out loud. You’re lucky you’re in Slytherin, you know. Snape usually goes absolutely ballistic if anyone interrupts his lesson.
I’m sorry, I forgot what a stickler you were. I just - I didn’t think I’d miss it.
Please, Theo, forget the drinks. I cannot in good conscience stand by and let you break so many rules. You’ve been here less than a week!
Guess you’ll have to keep an eye on me. Make sure I stay out of trouble.
Exactly.
Great. See you Saturday at 8.
113 notes · View notes
mybworlds · 2 days ago
Text
Chapter 9: Emptiness
Pairing: joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | Rating: 18+ Minors DNI | W.C.:
Summary: Your life sounds perfect: you live with a perfect man, you live in your dream house, you do the job you love, you don't miss anything, except love and passion.
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Warnings: no use of Y/N, use of you, reader is a photographer, reader has no physical descriptions except hair (no type or color) long enough to hold on to, unspecified age gap, Joel and reader are two cheaters, for a while. Smut, use of pet names, dirty talk, masturbation, unprotected PiV but the first time, creampies, comeplay, oral (both f and m recieving), exhibitionism, size kink, personal use of an unspecified sex toy. No outbreak here. Let me know if I missed anything!
Masterlist
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Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics
Taglist @harriedandharassed
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The air suddenly becomes suspended, as if charged with a strange electricity. Patrick no longer speaks and Joel seems to have become a statue, you don't know what to do or say. You wish you hadn't been so direct and hasty in your words, but now it's done, you can't go back.
“Patrick?” you resume “I'm sorry, but I had to tell you the truth. It's not fair that you still believe or hope that we'll get back together.” you are lapidary even though you don't know if there will actually something with Joel, but you really hope so.
Patrick sighs, “I see.” He sighs again, “Are you happy?”
You feel a tightness in the pit of your stomach, you close your eyes and look up at Joel who instead is not looking at you anymore and you feel empty. Is he afraid? Does he not want to? Does he not care about you?
On the other hand, he’s always been clear, he told you since your first meeting that he doesn't want a relationship with you or anyone else, why should he change his mind now? For you? Not even before you were in bed, he told you that he wanted a future with you, he just told you that he was fine, but... while for you that might mean having feelings, for him it might not be like that.
“I'm confused.” You are sincere in your response to Patrick.
“He doesn’t want you?” he asks you.
You look up at Joel who has his back to you now, his body turned toward the kitchen and his hands resting on the sink, his head still low.
“I don't know.” You answer him and in those moments, seeing his reaction, you can't help but wonder if deep down you didn't do everything wrong with Joel and Patrick. “Patrick, I'm sorry,” you add, clutching the phone tighter.
“We’ve both hurt each other, baby.” He sighs. “I don’t know what’s going to happen with him, but I hope he makes you feel more important than I did.” he adds with a regretful tone.
You wanted to tell him that given Joel's expression, it's highly unlikely that you can or he will want to continue seeing you. But you don’t say anything.
“I wish you every happiness,” Patrick tells you again.
“Yes, you too.” there’s still a moment of silence between you, then he ends the call.
You place the phone on Joel's kitchen peninsula and then look up, taking in the weight of the words you just said: Joel is silent and motionless as if everything he has heard has robbed him of the strength to move and speak. He still doesn't look at you.
“Joel?” you call, getting up from the stool. “I’m sorry you heard it that way, but… it’s the truth.”
He sighs, looking towards the window next to the kitchen, “Do you know why I never wanted to bond with someone again?” he asks without looking at you.
You shake your head, even though you know he's not looking at you.
“Because I can’t stand to see or hear words like the ones I heard. D’ you know what my ex-wife said to me when I tried to find a way to get back together?” he pauses, a long one and that's when he turns towards you “That she had fallen in love with someone else, that she was confused, that things between us weren't workin’. Do you know how that made me feel? Useless, a useless man." he nods “And the worst thing is that Patrick is my friend and I did what I did to him.”
You frown, “There were two of us, there have always been two of us who were together, in confiding in each other.” You tell him almost in a pleading tone “Please, don’t feel guilty. We both wanted it.” he shakes his head. “Joel? Please don’t.” a horrible creepy feeling spreads inside you, Joel doesn't want you. He's pushing you away.
Your eyes fill with tears, your lips tremble, you look down, while timid tears fly towards the floor. You feel like throwing up, a feeling of rejection, of pain tightens your stomach making you almost unable to breathe.
“Please, talk to me.” you beg.
His face becomes tense, then he finally looks up at you and the sweet look you had found there until a few minutes ago has disappeared. He looks cold, his gaze hard, then shakes his head, “I can’t.” his gaze is empty, unrecognizable.
“Maybe we could...”
“No.” his tone is cold, he doesn’t allow for replies “There’s no us.” you freeze in place "You better go.” he adds, looking everywhere but at you.
The world around you is spinning wildly. Suddenly nothing seems to make sense, every thought you have is jumbled together so meaningless. Your lower lip is trembling, shy tears are streaming down your cheeks, “That was the reason why I just fucked. Now even that won't be possible anymore because every time it’ll happens, I won't be able to help but wonder if I will see your same look in another woman, or if any other woman won't want to change her life because of me." his is a thin whisper in which each word is well articulated and impossible not to hear.
You’re about to tell him not to shut himself away, not to treat you like this, but he interrupts you again, “When you go out, make sure you close the door tightly.”
You're about to repeat his name and beg him not to treat you like this, but nothing comes out of your mouth, not even a sound. He gives you one last long, silent look, then you're left alone in his house.
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You look desperate and absent at the same time, you don't even know where you're going. You only know that you're empty, completely empty. Your heart is beating hard in your chest, it hurts. You are speechless and almost breathless. What happened has completely shaken you. You are struggling not to give in to the tears that are building up in the back of your eyes.
Everything is destroyed. Everything is lost.
You have lost everything.
You have nothing left and what could have been a beautiful project that you could have shared with him, with Joel, has disintegrated because by his own admission he himself has already lived everything and does not intend to do it again. He's always been clear from the beginning. His previous relationship burned him so much that even his heart is reduced to ashes and now maybe hearing it beat again for someone pains him so much that he doesn't want to feel it.
You wipe away your tears a couple of times, not wanting to attract anyone's attention. You know that surely no one will even look at your face, but crying for you has always been an act to be done alone.
You have now arrived in front of your shop, the seat of your great infinite pride, your job. Maybe everything can start from here, from who you are, a photographer, a good photographer. And it's not you who says it, but the people who turn to you.
You struggle to concentrate, your mind often goes back there, to that silent goodbye. Joel won't go back. If his ex-wife hurt him as much as he says, he won't look for you again.
No matter how hard you try to think positively, to focus on something else, your mind always takes you back to that exact moment, to when you destroyed three lives at once, when you uttered those fateful words.
I fell in love with someone else.
You feel stupid because for a day you really had illusions that Joel could choose you, but then all of that dissolved before your eyes, shattering your hopes and your heart.
Emptiness.
That's what you feel.
Emptiness.
Just a deep, unbridgeable void.
As the hours pass, the situation does not improve, indeed it seems always be worse.
You feel weak, cowardly, maybe the problem is not Patrick or Joel who clearly rejected you, but you are the problem. Maybe you need so much love, passion, desire that you don't care about making others feel bad if you're fine.
What kind of person have you become?
Daisy's words that should comfort you make you collapse into a state of great despair. She’s very sweet, she takes great care of you in every possible and imaginable way, but all this doesn't lift your spirits.
You don't know what kind of person you are anymore. You once knew exactly who you were and what you wanted, you thought you knew it and you went straight down that road.
The result?
You hit a wall called Joel Miller. A wall that left your heart broken, bleeding and humiliated you like no one had ever done before.
But you want to make a last desperate attempt, you want to talk to him. You want to do it calmly, find the right words and not be reckless. You know it will almost certainly hurt to hear certain things, but you want to hear them. You have two.
Are you a masochist?
Yes, maybe.
But then you tell yourself that if he's cruel to you again, you'll be the one who doesn't want to think about him anymore. You want him, you want him in your life, but you don't want someone who makes you feel weak and vulnerable, who uses you and then throws you away like that.
You are not like that, you know it. You know you are worth so much more than this. You deserve better. And if that better is being without Joel Miller, then so be it.
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Daisy of course advises you against it. She says you aren’t thinking clearly yet. You feel confused, but determined.
It's been almost three weeks and now you're sure you want to talk to him, you need to. Even if you know you probably won't get a different answer than the one you've already had, but as much as it may hurt you now you want to put an end to it.
The emptiness he left in you has given way to disappointment and anger.
You reach his house thinking about what to say to him, but everything seems stupid or incoherent. You are in front of his place.
You ring the bell.
What the fuck are you doing here?
You hear a voice shouting ‘comin’, it’s a woman. Your heart skips a beat. A moment later, a beautiful woman opens the door. The woman is wearing a bathrobe, she looks strong and determined, but above all happy. She smiles at you, “You’re the delivery guy, aren’t you? You were fast!”
You're shocked, “No... uhm, is Joel there?”
“Yes, are you a colleague of his?” she asks you, pulling the edges of his bathrobe a little tighter.
“No.”
“So, who are you?” she asks.
“Uhm…”
“Tess, who’s there?” another voice from inside reaches your ears. It's Joel.
Joel appears behind her, opening the door a little wider. His expression changes from puzzled to astonished, then he becomes gloomy, “What are you doing here?” he asks you.
What are you doing there? You're wondering that too.
Tess looks at your face, then at Joel's. You don't know what to answer.
You kind of expected it, but not in such a brutal way. He replaced you even though he told you he couldn't do that anymore after what you told him.
“Sorry, I was wrong to come.” You don’t know what else to say to them.
How stupid!
You turn your back on them, feeling a lump in your throat. You move away quickly from Joel’s place. You were wrong to go there, but now more than ever you feel like you can move on and stop thinking about him. He has already replaced you. There’s nothing left for you.
You decide you don't want to think about Joel Miller anymore, since you met him you have fallen into a vortex of passion, he has satisfied you every time, but no one has shattered your heart like he did. You hold your hair with both hands, tonight you stay in your shop where you tinker with the computer. You look back at all the photoshoots you've done over the last two years and think about how many times you've put yourself aside to please others, but making yourself unhappy and pretending it was your decision.
Now all this has to end. From now on you will only think about yourself, for a while enough with love. You have only known how to make a lot of messes. You go through some old emails and find one from a few years ago that you received for a fashion show of a prestigious fashion house. You never wanted to trash it because you liked to remember that moment and then because in the email as a post scriptum they had written to you that if you had been interested there would always have been a place for you. It was really a great service that you did, you remember that they wrote to you that the sales had even tripled after your work!
You smile while looking at the screen. Why not!
Maybe Saint Barbara will do you good.
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lucygraysboy · 2 days ago
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“you’re welcome. i really like the idea of using colors as middle names, very unique.” and yet shows that they’re a community. a family. “why would i want to do something nice for you? ‘cause it’s better than just sayin’ thank you, right? actions speak louder than words? and besides, why not help if i can? i can see reva blue means a lot to you.” he shrugs, still very much puzzled by her mindset — does she genuinely believe there’s no good in people? “poor reva blue, but at least her skirt still looks nice and she seems to be thriving.” speaking about the bear as if she were a real person because it feels right, proves that he isn’t heartless. “and how’d you like it? that lifestyle, i mean.” he has trouble picturing his brother, a spitting image of their father apparently, traveling from place to place and having a good time. living out in the woods? in district 12? no way. “i see.” putting pieces of the story together, he can see the bigger picture now and although there are still chunks of it missing, he can almost understand the enormity of her tragedy. “sounds like you and my brother went through a lot together. the games, the mayor’s daughter, and then he just turned on you?” he feels sorry for this girl, being alone in the world is a terrible thing, but being alone after suffering so greatly and being betrayed… it’s a nightmare. it’s one of the reasons why he seems to have unlimited amounts of compassion and empathy for her — he doesn’t know what he’d do if he were the one in her place. 
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“so you aren’t plannin’ on eventually returnin’? to twelve? where will you go? i mean, i don’t think you can live out here forever. winter’s coming.” what is she going to eat? he doesn’t believe the story about traps for squirrels. how is she going to stay warm? he can’t imagine her wielding an axe and chopping down trees. and this wound… he’s not sure if iodine can help it at this point. she might need actual help from a medic. what if gangrene sets in? “and this other billy? billy taupe? what’s his story?” is he still alive? is he looking for her? “i’ll be honest with you. it doesn’t look good.” part of him is tempted to keep this piece of information to himself as not to scare her, but he doesn’t want to sugarcoat or lie. she’s not a child even if she at times reminds him of one. besides, she probably already knows this. he can tell that she’s highly intelligent just by looking in her eyes. “look, if it gets any worse… if what we’re doin’ now doesn’t work, you might have trouble walkin’ on this leg and it will become a real problem.” would she let him take her to thirteen then? would he be able to carry her for miles and miles? or find a way? after all, he did get lost and that’s why he’s here. it begins to dawn on him what a terrible situation they’re in. “you can squeeze my shoulders.” if it hurts. left hand clutching her calf, holding her leg in place so that she doesn’t kick him in the head when the pain becomes too much, he looks up at her apologetically and begins to clean the wound. he uses the cloth, soaked in warm water, to scrub her raw flesh, get rid of any dirt that may be in there. fingertips pressing on the edges, making sure there’s no pus beneath the tissue.
“thanks, i guess i like a compliment like that one.” she loves a compliment like that one but it’s coming from him— so it’s hard to accept it. hard to thank him for anything. “i don’t get why you’d want to.” thinking out loud, thick brows pulling into a confused crease just for that look to deepen when he says back at the capitol. “just from wear and tear, carryin’ that poor thing around place to place through the years… us covey never stay in one place for long.” lucy gray reminds, since his memory has been completely wiped out. “they have no clue about my whereabouts. i had to flee district twelve after you killed the mayor’s daughter because she was gonna rat us out. mayor already hated me, so of course i was gonna be his suspect. target even. give him the perfect reason to hang me, with or without evidence.” the brunette grumbles, leaving out the part where she put the snake down mayfair’s dress to make the mayor hate her. afraid the topic of snakes might trigger something in him. “i can’t answer that exactly…hard tellin’ what goes on his head. your head.” she corrects herself, she doesn’t think it was jealousy because he liked her though. she believes it was jealousy because billy taupe was a threat, something possessive deep in coriolanus rotting his insides. “oh…okay,” wanting to disagree, but not having the energy to get on his bad side. “climbin’ over a rock and that happened.” easy to do when you grow tired and starved. giving a nod, she’ll keep her blouse like this because she doesn’t want to stain it until dries. “ow-” quietly wincing, biting into her lower lip as leg instinctively jerks at his touch. “it has, i think at this point i’ve gotten used to the pain of it. —almost.” until his finger tips explored and touched it barely, causing her stomach muscles to cave inwards. “no, i’m fine. i’m all right.” her shoulders are cold, but she doesn’t need tended to since her shivering has faded and ridding the wet clothes helped with that. feeling a lot better than she did.
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whereispearlescentmoon · 8 hours ago
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Pearl Wild Life Session 6 Live Reaction
Title has me scared, thumbnail has me hyped. Murder camel?? But also Loss??? | | |I
|| | |_
Yay trap day!
Ooo our only choices are Gem and Lizzie!
Meeting time! We have a six person team that’s literally crazy. Grandpa and Ghost are here.
Not them being liars in chat lol “This is crazy!” “no way” “YOU GUYS DONT HAVE THIS?” “that was scary for a second” the power of having so many people is you can just lie.
PEARL STOP GOING PLACES ALONE! THIS IS HOW WE DIE PEARL!
Hi Billy! Hi cows!
Bluetooth redstone!
BILLY NO!
GUARDIAN AND PIGLINS AND PILLAGERS??
Billy is a donkey now??
New camel duo!!
OG CAMEL DUO YAY!
“How much do you hate me today Gem?” “A lot!” We may be on a camel but the divorce is still on!
“You know why though? I’ve reasons today. I have reason. I’ve reflected. Do you remember last session when you couldn’t remember, you thought you put your eye into the portal! Do you remember that?” “Ohhh but we weren’t even there for you putting the eyeball into that!” “Did you even look me in the face during our murder camel happenings?” “Yeah we had such a good time! It was so much fun!” “Do you remember what my face looked like?” “Oh. I forgot about your skin.” “Are you guys bonding?” “No, not bonding at all Impulse. This is so sad” “Okay and then other than that!” “It’s okay she’s gonna talk about it Impulse.” “You 2v1’d me! I’m still holding a grudge about that! And you know about holding grudges across seasons!” “Let’s put this straight! I didn’t 2v1 you. I let Scar kill you, I watched.” “No, I remember specifically you hitting me once!” “Just once! Just one little wack!” “It was not a regen based season!” “I sat the dogs down, Gem. You had so many hearts, you were gonna live!” “Once was enough!” “You were fine, you see look at that! We’re thriving!” You’re both right and both wrong. The best kind of argument.
“I’m just saying, I’ll forgive you if you actually 1v1v1v whatever me and not 2v1.” “It seems kinda like we’re trying to kill each other at that point. Seems kinda against the point, no? Right?” “Yeah, we have to die Pearl, that’s the game.” “Seems like there’s only resolution after the game, right?” “We can die six times, we don’t have to die.” “I CANT DIE SIX TIMES? I can die twice!” “You can die once.” “Okay, 1v1 me right now Gem.” “Okay!” “You were too all into that.” “Well. It’s high stakes for you. We’ve PvPed on Hermitcraft, it’s about 50/50 who wins who loses.” “Yeah but I’m yellow.” You two are going to drive me insane. SHES OFFERING YOU A SOLUTION PEARL PLEASE I KNOW ITS HIGH STAKES BUT THE DRAMA WOULD BE DELISH EITHER WAY!
Oh no what happens if Billy becomes hostile. Do we have to kill him?
Lizzie sacrificed herself to Jimmy! Gem is the last dark green…
Impulse and Pearl trapping together! And failing!
“You don’t need Impulse! You’re capable!” “Clearly not!” Seems like you weren’t there for her 27 fails against Lizzie last session lol.
“Two hunks on the hump” martyn why
“Puppy! Awwwww”
All that argument about the cows was for nothing…. We made enemies with Gem and Joel for nothing…
A positive shiny duo interaction? In my wild life? (Ignore that she called Gem a rat and tried to kill her it’s fine) AND THEY GOT ON A CAMEL AFTER!
Tango on the camel! A new murder buddy! Hi Skizzy! Can’t wait to watch other povs and see her camel scooting across the ground lol.
SKIZZ GOT THE GEM KILL YAY! Pearl didn’t aww
THERES A WARDEN WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING IN THIS SERIES!
Oh it’s Tango, Pearl and Etho! That’s the perfect trio to encounter a warden! The decked out winner, Queen, and game master lol
Oh great they name tagged it so he can never leave. Beautiful.
Pearl’s immunity to warden fear is real and true. I do not believe Grian even a little bit. No one should get near the warden lol.
SKIZZ RUN SKIZZ RUN SKIZZ WHY YOU JUST GOT BACK TO GREEN
Skizz, Scott and Pearl slowly tridenting a warden to death is so funny. PEARL DO NOT GET CLOSER PEARL!
Oh she got the totem! Yay!! I should have believed Grian!
A creeper claims another kill. Oh BigB with a creeper! He doesn’t get a life cause Skizz was light green tho.
Ah! A pit trap on the creeper farm! And a trap on the wheat! This whole base is rigged to kill and that’s wonderful.
Scar died to a Vex? Ironic. And Etho to a Skellyboy!
Ooo Skizz on red!
PEARL WHY DO YOU WANT TO START A RAID??
“Pearl and I are off to cause chaos!” Welcome to the summary of Impulse and Pearl’s wild life season. Aw the raid isn’t working :( NEVER MIND ITS WORKING NOW SCRAM
Jimmy was killed by bloop?
“You know I want you to win the series!” AWW SHE GAVE HIM HER TOTEM! THEY ARE BESTIES! I LOVE THEM!
Skizz is gone! Aw! Jimmy is officially the highest rank he’s ever been btw.
It’s a birthday cake! Yay!
Since when was Lizzie on red? Hello?
Pearl failing to kill… again. She’s so washed up (affectionate)
Trip cancelled! Trip cancelled! That editing was hilarious with the music stopping.
Pearl you will not be able to successfully trap Gem. I think we have to give up at some point. (This is a joke)
“Pearl, Scar wants me to kill you and I said no way” “Why would he want to kill me? I haven’t done anything to him.” “He said you want out of the series, so, and I said no that’s a lie.” Nosey Neighbors crumbs.
Calling a lie a “porky” is the most Aussie thing I’ve ever heard.
Omg she stole Gem’s camel. There’s some symbolism there I guess.
Yay Bdubs ally! I dub thee, Gonzo.
I liked the wild card this episode! Very fun, especially cause of how much of the season has been squabbling about cows lol. Who cares, the cows are dead!
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skepticalarrie · 2 days ago
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hey! i've always believed in early Larry but recently have fallen down a rabbit hole about babygate and am convinced. i'm just stuck on a few points and was wondering if there are any theories.
1) what happened on the day of the 'birth'? if he is brett's child born from surrogacy, how did they get briana's name on the birth certificate and either get the baby into the hospital without alerting staff there that briana was not pregnant OR have had a non-pregnant briana stay in hospital for days. what are the theories on how they orchestrated the hospital stay logistically? surely it would've been easier to claim she wanted a home birth. also not sure if they rented a room in the hospital and just kind of camped out there?
2) is there any evidence of Louis being a present father to Freddie? the main reason i started to question the media narrative was that it seems like Louis rarely sees him and in AOTV it almost seemed awkward, like the child didn't really know him. adjacent to that, is there any evidence that Eleanor, who was supposedly with him for FIVE years post-babygate, ever met his son? after all the fuss about danielle vs briana and danielle mentioning her by name in interviews, not even a fluff article about step mum life and loving him? it seems like they forgot to account for parts of the narrative - on the surface, it seems fine but it falls apart on inspection.
thanks from a reborn larry :)
Aww, a reborn Larrie, how cute! Hahah welcome back!
1- I have two tags you might want to check out to see if they answer your questions: BIRTH CERTIFICATE and SURROGATE. But to sum it up, I don’t think it's as complicated as it seems. We don’t actually know what’s on the official birth certificate, no one does. What we saw was a copy of it, and it had a lot of inconsistencies. Personally, my guess is that the birth certificate was never even filed at the state level, and the names of the legal parents (Brett and Tammi) are likely on it. If Louis and Briana’s names are there officially, it would follow the typical process for surrogacy pregnancies, and I fully believe Freddie is unrelated to the surrogate. So the intended parents would be listed on the birth certificate regardless, so there were no special logistics involved at the hospital or anything like that.
2- Louis’ involvement in Freddie’s life started around 2021, and that's undeniable, even if you believe he's Freddie’s biological father. It’s interesting how some people claim we can’t know whether Louis was present for Freddie or how often they saw each other, but then they use it as proof when they are together later on. There’s definitely been a noticeable shift in Louis’ behaviour... he completely ignored Freddie’s existence for years. He never spoke about him. And then, all of a sudden, they're all over the place together, and Louis can't stop mentioning him. So, there’s at least something odd about it. As for Eleanor, the only time we saw them in the same place was at Louis’ LA show, which was being recorded for AOV. They were kind of in the same booth but on different sides, so there was some overlap, but that’s the closest interaction we’ve seen. Babygate became more consistent after Louis and Eleanor broke up and before they got back together in 2017. During all their time together, there was no babygate, basically!
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tinfoil-jones · 2 days ago
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Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 14
Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.
Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications
Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here
WARNING: TW/Mentions of past Suicidal ideations
First - Prev - Next
CH.14
“You’re just going to give him free reign of the house?”
“I did not think you of all people would have a problem with this, you were the one who expressed the most disapproval with keeping him in the containment unit.”
“Yes, but wasn’t your main concern that he would leave?”
“Fiddleford, he was homeless. Where else is he going to go?”
“Well there is that Rick character he keeps mentioning…”
“You sound a bit on edge, do you remember him from Backupsmore?”
“Remember him?”
“Do you remember Diane Sanchez? He’s her husband- well, he was her husband.”
“I’m afraid the name doesn’t ring a bell…”
“Hmm, I’m not surprised, engineering wasn’t her major. Regardless, you’re better off having not met him. I don’t believe we have to worry about him. He is… very far away.”
“And Stan has no hard feelings towards you?”
“On one hand, he tells me he believes I’m only keeping here as part of an elaborate, delusional grieving process, and he will ‘play along’ however long that process takes. On the other hand, he wrote ‘Look what I did to your other hand’ on my hand in marker while I was asleep, and on quite literally the other hand he drew a turkey. Fiddleford, stop laughing.”
“I wouldn’t call that malicious, but it certainly explains why you decided to keep your gloves on outside of the lab. And he agreed we could continue to study his memory loss?”
“Yes, he did - I assume that’s what you two were discussing earlier?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“You were up in the attic with him for at least an hour this morning, I assume you were conducting another interview? Locking the door was a bit excessive but without a neurology or psychology degree myself I am in no place to question your methods.”
“Interview-? Oh, um, yes. Interviewing. That’s exactly what we were doing. And nothing else.”
“Of course. Now- do you know where he is? I need to talk to him about an upcoming Cryptid Hunt.”
“You’re going to take him with you?”
“I was hoping both of you would accompany me actually. But if he will not, I’d need you to stay back here with him if you wouldn’t-”
“I wouldn’t mind none.”
“Thank you for your patience and understanding Fiddleford, I’m glad I was correct in my assumption that you’d be the best suited to assist me.”
“Any of our other colleagues woulda called the cops on your presumptuous behind.”
“...I know, and I am grateful you didn’t. Now, where is he?”
“Last I saw him was in the attic trying to cover up the window with a sheet - some type of paranoia? And I heard him come downstairs a few minutes ago but I haven’t seen him. If I were to take a guess though, he most likely went through that hatch leading to the platform on your roof - it’s still open.”
“What? Stanley can’t be on the roof, he’s afraid of heights.”
*Stan abruptly drops from the hatch, landing on his feet*
“Guys you won’t believe this but some dude in a giant moth costume just flew by- woah, you alright there PhD? You look like you already saw a ghost.”
(...)
*a series of clicking noises and hoots*
“Antenna curling! That's his tell! I fold.”
“Sorry, Stanley, but it appears Mothman was bluffing.”
“What? I had 4 aces! That moth is a wizard! Guess it’s up to you to win this for us, Doc.”
*Mothman takes a bite out of a wool cardigan, Fiddleford nearby with no chips angrily crosses his arms*
“...He's mocking me.”
“I was cheating the last 8 turns, too.”
“Stanley, for shame.”
“What? I already folded. This cheater didn’t prosper.”
(...)
“Good on you for winning, Stanford.”
“Of course, I’m just sorry that I couldn’t win before he took more bites out of your cardigan.”
“Good thing I had this flashlight to distract him, he really is a moth.”
“...Did you steal that from my coat closet?”
“Yes.”
“What else did you steal?”
“Well it’s a good thing Mothman didn’t have any money on him ‘cause you wouldn’t have anywhere to put it.”
“Give me back my wallet, Stanley.”
“Poor sport.”
(...)
“D-E-F-P-O-T-E-C”
“Now use both eyes, what’s the smallest line you can read?”
“Line ten. L-E-F-O-D-P-C-T.”
“Oculus dexter and oculus sinister are both 20/20, but your oculus uterque is 20/15.”
“Look we’ve been at this snail chart-”
“Snellen chart.”
“Whatever, we’ve done this like five times. What’s the point? I already told you I don’t need glasses.”
“It just doesn’t make sense… We’re identical, your visual acuity should be 20/40 or above because years of straining would make your vision even worse than mine.”
“I dunno what you want me to tell you PhD, my eyes are fine.”
“...Did Sanchez have something to do with this?”
“Sanc-.”
“Rick Sanchez. I know that’s the Rick you’ve off-handedly mentioned several times.”
“How can you be so sure? It’s a pretty common name.”
“Because you would be familiar with that egotistical, destructive, jaded, cynical-”
“Okay so you do know Rick. And yeah, we ran in the same circle for a bit, what about it?”
“He was always doing morally questionable experiments-”
“That’s funny coming from you.”
“-but altering physiology was something he had a special interest in. Did he give you some form of eye surgery or technological implant?”
“You think I’d let that nihilistic asshole near my eyes while I was passed out… or awake? Hell no. I don’t remember ever having vision problems. The closest he ever came to ‘altering’ me or whatever the fuck you’re tweaking about was help me steal a bunch of pills from the Galac-the government.”
“You- Why did you steal pills?”
“I couldn’t get decent sleep, and after getting my stomach pumped it’s not like any doctor was ever going to give me ambien or anything stronger ever again. Also, to stick it to the man.”
“... Stanley, did you- did you overdose on ambien?”
“Twice.”
“... Was it on purpose?”
“... Once. Only once. Don’t-. Don’t look at me like I’m a kicked puppy. I know it’s messed up. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I did it to myself, it isn’t anyone else’s fault. And I dunno what the fallout of your separation ten years ago was like, but no matter what happened this definitely wasn't your fault.
Look, if it makes you feel better, whatever you and specs have been spiking into my food and water has been working pretty great. I’m getting way better sleep here than I have in years.”
“We have not been putting drugs into your food or water.”
“If you say so, Doc.”
To be continued…
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lovingbini · 2 days ago
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beautiful coincidences
seok matthew x female!reader | meet cute | fluff, suggestive, slight making out a/n: i believe y'all know exactly what visual of matthew i'm talking about, right? right? *** you and matthew met at a clothing store when you reached for the same jacket. what happened was what one knows of interest at first sight. eyebrows raised, you waited for him to let go – well, he didn’t.
“alright, give me a reason why i should let you get it,” he said, a smile on his face.
“i can give you two, actually,” you dared. “first of all, i have something this weekend that demands this jacket. second, it will look better on me, respectfully.”
matthew gasped, but the smile never left his beautiful features. he took it as a green light to take a good look on your body, making your eyes slightly pop with such audacity.
“right, i admit you’re gorgeous and have a good styling. but it’s actually my birthday this saturday…” he pouted. “you wouldn’t ruin that by leaving with my favorite jacket, would you?”
you had to laugh.
“that’s funny, ‘cause the something i have this weekend is precisely my birthday party.”
“okay, no need to clown me!”
“i’m not! i’ve been planning this outfit for a while, but just got the money for it yesterday.”
matthew bites his lower lip, contemplating. you have a basket from the store with more clothes, which he acknowledges they match the jacket both of you are still holding.
“maybe we could celebrate together after our parties, what do you think? i could use an apology for making me so so sad.”
you smile once again, unable to resist the charms of the man in front of you.
“yeah, poor sad man, what’s your name again?”
“matthew, yours?”
“i’m y/n. now maybe you should give me your number and i’ll analyze your proposal ‘till saturday, is that alright?”
“perfect for me.” he grins.
***
the bar downtown had lounges on the third floor with a view of the city. you rented one of the spaces to spend the night with your loved ones with no worries. it worked so well that your friends were already planning the next events to be in that same room. the place had a glass wall that allowed you to watch the hallway to be aware of anything that was happening outside.
that’s when you saw him.
matthew was standing on the other side of the building – a cup in his hand, hair slicked back and a jacket that looked exactly like yours. he was talking to what seemed to be his funniest friend; his beautiful smile was out for the world to witness, for you to remember how you didn’t text him at all.
it wasn’t on purpose, really. you just got busy with the preparations and ended up leaving it for later – a later that didn’t come.
sensing he’s being watched, matthew looks around and finds you on the other end. tilting his head to the side, his smile changes. he cheers on you with his almost empty glass, you return the action and sign him to meet you in the hallway.
“well, look who wasn’t lying,” he teases while getting closer. “somehow, i don’t see you wearing that so very demanded jacket…”
you hold a smile.
“it was getting kinda hot in there, but i can put it back if you prefer.”
“oh, no, i wouldn’t tell you to do anything you don’t want to. but i can’t lie and say i don’t enjoy this view even more.” there he goes again, scanning you up and down.
“sorry i didn’t text you, things became pretty hectic the last couple days.”
“nah, it’s fine. guess we can seize the moment right now. keep that communication going with no rush this time.”
and you do. the hours pass while you talk about trivial stuff, making sure to be interested in every aspect of each others lives. matthew’s not only handsome and charismatic, he's also part of the production team from a company you know very well — you were invited to work with them for a promotion but the schedules didn't match after all. what did match, though, was the both of you.
the way you laughed in sync, the way you looked at each other with so much attention and curiosity, the way the slightest touches made you two waver. you wish you would've met sooner, but on the other hand, getting to know each other in a place full of people who cherished you and knew how to have fun— oh, that was perfect.
later, when matthew found a more private space to enjoy your presence, you found yourself pretty comfortable on his lap. his kisses were addicting, his hands pressed your curves in ways you could just imagine. first, he was very attentive of your reactions, second, you were the most obvious woman on earth. nevertheless, it was working, matthew’s smoking hot and eager to show his every move. through the few sane thoughts still roaming in your mind, you couldn’t stop the willingness of taking him back home with you.
“wait, i need to pee,” you say, suddenly.
“like in a kinky way, or something?”
“no, what the hell!”
you burst out laughing and hide your face in his neck. matthew pats you in the back, waiting for a real answer.
“i’m serious. i kind of grinded on you in a way that hurt a bit, so it reminded me i’m here kissing you for a long time now.”
“okay, so go relieve yourself and i’ll be right here, waiting to be grinded on for another long time.”
you kiss him again, biting his lower lip as a punishment, but of course he moaned.
“you’ll be a nightmare to handle, matthew.”
“glad to know we have plans together for the next couple days.”
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sissybabycucksophia · 18 hours ago
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The Adult Baby Adoption Part 3
(This story is complete fiction and although i may desperately wish it isn’t, there is no fact or real world experience behind this story, and themes reflected in the story may be triggering, these themes are not my actual beliefs and are only part of a fantasy kink scenario. Also non of the images belong to me)
“Wakey Wakey Jadey bear~” a familiar voice melodically hummed, slowly i began to open my eyes having fallen asleep on daddy’s lap. Now however i appeared to be somewhere else. Slowly coming too I realised i was sat in a changing room, with daddy stood between me and the door. Looking down I realised I was sat in nothing but my diaper and my pathetic little girls flower cross necklace, even the pink wig on my head was removed and I gradually noticed that the diaper was a brand new diaper. “Well aren’t you a sound sleeper Jadey bear? I managed get you completely undressed, remove your wig and change your diaper all without you waking up! Also i added a few diaper stuffers to your diaper just to make it last longer” daddy said gently patting my head.
Feeling the embarrassment rush through me i reacted oddly to my nakedness and crossed my arms across my chest trying to cover up, “daddy…. Why have got no clothes on?” I whimpered looking up at him. At that daddy would pull out of his bag and begin securing on my head a more realistic looking Brunette wig which reached down to my nipples. “Because silly little baby! We need to get you more appropriately dressed obviously” daddy chuckled as he kissed my cheek and I noticed hanging on the door in front of me a big puffy white dress. “Ready for what?” I whimpered to which daddy stood up right after securing the new wig and said “ready for your Christening baby! Your going to be christened Jade Ulysses Carmichael and from then on you’ll be one of god’s soldiers. You’ll live a life devoted to this church, its flock and your fellow babies also being christened today. We’ll get a certificate with your new name and we will never again have to refer too you by that vulgar name you used to have. I can’t wait for you to legally have my first name as your middle name and my surname as your surname! You’ll truly feel like my child once my name is part of your name!”
Shock hit me like a bus as daddy spoke, I don’t believe in any god or any religion! And yet this man was not only going to christen me a follower of his religion but also change my name and add his name into mine like a stamp of ownership! “But daddy I Don’t beli….” I tried to protest but daddy cut me off as he pulled me too my feet and took the puffy white dress from the door, unzipping the back of the dress it was clearly it had been designed in a most child appropriate style but in adult dimensions. “Ssshhh jade, i know your excited baby but we really must get you ready!” Daddy said as he then raised the dress over my head and dropped it down over me.
Man handling my arms through the waste, the dress would stop with the waist resting on my diaper waist band. Guiding my arms into the dress’s sleeves daddy pulled the torso of the dress up into place. Before i could object i felt the torso of the dress begin cinching tight around my body from the waist up as daddy zipped me in. Looking down i saw a tight bodice with little sparkly detailing, puffy shoulders which tapered into form fitting sleeves which were lined by sparkly detailing and a skirt which poofed out from my waist hiding everything beneath. As I studied myself daddy would begin guiding my feet into whilte socks with frills around the ankle and a pair of white dolly flats with an ankle strap and white flowers across the toes. Stepping back too look me up and down daddy would turn me around too look at myself in the mirror, as I studied myself daddy would reach over my shoulders and dig out the little girl flower cross necklace to make sure it was on show.
Hugging me from behind daddy whispered “my beautiful little angel, your the vision of femininity my gorgeous baby girl. I honestly cant wait to christen you my daughter! Remember when your being christened that your giving yourself to god and this church baby! Isn’t that great?!” Daddy whispered in my ear. Not that i really heard it as i stood looking at myself in the mirror… why was I Allowing this, surely any embarrassment from being seen chastised and diapered couldn’t be as bad as this! As i stood totally enraptured and entranced by mental fantasies of escape and freedom i didn’t even flinch as daddy secured a thick black collar around my neck which on the front had my new baby name ‘jade’ in big metallic letters and from the back of it i felt something hanging down my back. However it wouldn’t be until i felt my right wrist being grabbed by daddy and manoeuvred behind my back that i would stop day dreaming and begin too panic.
As i felt a thick cuff lock around my right wrist I panicked asking daddy “have you not embarrassed me enough by dressing me like this? Can i not even have my arms free?” I whimpered as I tried too tug my right arm back round it would tug on my neck as the two collars seemed connected. Ignoring my concerns daddy would secure my left wrist into the other cuff and before i knew it i was helpless once again, turning me around too look at me daddy crouch before me and placed a hand on either side if the bodice of my dress and looked deep into my eyes as he said “you know why i agree to take such a yucky, ugly, weak, pasty and pathetic little boy from the agency to be my Baby girl? Do you know why i picked you? Your eyes…. Your beautiful big blue eyes. So innocent and adorable, i knew that once i fixed the rest and made you a little girl that those eyes would be far more comfortable once the face and body around them matched their feminine and beautiful charm!” Daddy said as I suddenly stopped struggling to get my arms free and blushed with embarrassment as i said “you chose me because my eyes are pretty? But you said you didn’t want a boy baby from the agency? You said we had to make do with the fact this mix up had happened and it was my fault for reading the paperwork wrong” i said with confidence and even upset building in my voice. He’d chosen me! Had he stolen me away before a mommy dom got the chance too choose me?. “Sssssshhhhh jade there there. Yes i chose you, your right I didn’t want a baby boy but i knew looking at your innocent blue eyes i could make you perfect! Now we best go now, its your turn now to be Christened!” Daddy replied standing up and opening the changing room door, tears began to fill my eyes as visions of a different life flash through my mind. Leading me out the door of the changing room I followed behind like the submissive little baby faggot that I was, leading me too the stage I looked out as “parents” sat with their “babies” sat all dressed up. The adult babies all wore white, the adult baby girls all wore dresses like me and the baby boys wore white suits.
Looking too daddy he motioned for me to sit on the chair behind a school desk in the middle of the stage, shuffling over i sat down struggling to keep my dress from poofing out in all directions as I struggled to free my arms. Sat before me was a piece of paper on which was written ‘This Document hereby states that James Valence will be Transitioning To and will be changing their name too Jade Ulysses Carmichael. As such this document also states that the afore mentioned James, willingly grants Ulysses Carmichael Full Power of Attorney while still of mental capacity to do so. As such this legally binding document states that James Valence will be legally adopted by Ulysses Carmichael and will turn over all decision making capabilities and freedoms too Ulysses Carmichael.’ Oh god no! This couldn’t be happening! And it got worse! My signature had already been faked on the document! Watching daddy go into his pocket and pulling out a pen and reaching past me to sign and accept legal authority over me, “no please! Daddy stop! Don’t do this!!! Im a man but i swear i’ll never resist you again as long as you don’t sign that please!! Please!! You cant do this!!! You can’t take my freedom like this!!!!” I begged and whimpered as tears gushed down my face and dripped onto my dress. Signing to contract regardless, daddy would proceed to kiss me on the lips and begin making out with me before pulling back too whispering “sh’up faggot, your mine now! No ones coming to save you! Now dry those helpless blue eyes and lets get you christened!” With an evil smile as he grabbed the underside of my left arm and dragged me too my gay little dolly flat and frilly sock coated feet.
At that the crowd of parents and subs cheered, clapping, throwing diapers, Dresses, Bras and stuffies onto the stage at me. As they did reverend imelda would come onto stage and stood at her podium, then from the floor of the stage next to daddy arose a large Tank of water. “Well as you all know Today we Christen all of your new babies with their new names and identities as your children. The first beautiful baby to day to be Christened in the eyes of god is the absolutely pathetic Jade Ulysses Carmichael!!!!” Reverend Imelda said excitedly as daddy push me over too the tank of water pressed me up against it so my knees were against the tank. Then i felt his hand on the back of my neck and suddenly before i could say a word i was bent over at the waist, my ribs against the rim of the tank and my head fully submerged. Panicking i screamed under the water and desperately thrashed around trying to free my arms and push myself out but the straps holding my arms behind my back were far too tight. My life began flashing before my eyes as I inhaled water and coughed wasting valuable oxygen, whats worse was i knew no one was helping me nor was reverend Imelda stopping the ceremony. After 2 minutes and thirty seconds daddy would pull my head out of the water, dropping to my knees in my puffy christening dress I began coughing up the water i’d swallowed as tears rolled down my face and sissy cum’s leaked into him diaper. “I now hereby announce Jade Ulysses Carmichael christened!” Reverend Imelda said excitedly as a cheer filled the room. Dragging me to my feet Daddy picked me up bridal style once again and would carry me off stage too an empty seat at the end of the front row. Sitting me down right night too the man who’d humped me against my will. “Babies need to sit in the front row, daddy will be just a few rows back. Welcome to my family and the church Jade… daddy’s so proud of you” he said as he then disappeared.
For the next two hours i sat watching every Adult baby sign a name change and power of attorney document before having there heads dunked in the tank. Like me some were horribly distressed and uncomfortable but every baby had some kind of restraints on their hands or arms too stop them fighting the dunk. Tears slowly dripping down my face the entire time and sniffling like a sad little girl eventually the event began to reach its conclusion. Being lifted to my feet by daddy I was escorted to a group picture with all the “babies”. However as though a cruel taunt I was stood next to the only other Adult baby who had been forced to crossdress. Recognising her from earlier the girl was beautiful, she had such soft skin so soft and feminine looking, her eyes a beautiful golden brown and her lips plump and shapely. However much to the sheer devastation of the girl she had had her hair cut and shaven to a buzz cut, her chest was clearly being binded, her nails has been cut short and was stood wearing a white formal suit. Her hands were mittened and cuffed together in front of her and a pacigag held a blue paci in her mouth.
Stood next to her I begun to feel less alone as she balled and whaled with tears of sheer devastation and despair. As they arranged us to take the picture, I stepped closer to her pressing my chest against her side. Looking at me she tried to shake her head and say she wasn’t a man, “its ok! I’m a boy! Look just snuggle up to me like we’re getting along then when you get home tell your captor that you would feel better if you got a playdate with Jade Carmichael!” I whispered as I then rather humiliatingly rested my head on her shoulder and smiled. As the picture was taken so marked the end of the ordeal, grabbing my by the shoulder my now legal guardian and decision maker would lead me out of the church, forcing me to curtsy goodbye to every adult we stopped to talk too on the way out.
(Pictures for reference, Jade is forced to wear this dress in an adult size that fits him)
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