#I can understand writing past x ship if they were actually together at some point but most of the times it just clogging the tags and half

[courtneydeservesbetter]

My fanfic pet peeve is when every possible ship is tagged on a fic where it’s only about ONE couple. If the fic is gw*ncan, why are the tags duncney, gwourtney, gweather, heathney, gweoff, djwen, aleheather, noco, nowen, ext. ENOUGH.

[vole-mon-amour]

You know, I was surprised by the amount of people asking for s4. I understand, it's your favourite show. Mine, too. I'll be devastated if we never see Phil as Jamie again (he's my fav character, can't do anything about it). I'll miss him very very much.

However,

1. I was amazed by the amount of things they got wrong but general audience saying that the finale was perfect and asking for more. We must be watching a very different show.

2. After that AMA with Brendan, I simply don't trust the writers to continue this. In my mind it's a bit of a relief that we're probably not getting more because of the possibility of them ruining it even further.

Sure, one of my fav episodes (Sunflowers, 3x06) was written by Jason S. and Joe Kelly. Brendan was probably involved in some way, but not enough to give him credit for writing and directing it.

International break, 3x10, was written by Jane Becker. There are moments that I dislike, but the entire Uncle day? Roy & Jamie being besties? Roy finding the right words after he sees Jamie giving a nod to Sam that couldn't represent his team? Chef's kiss. I still think the way they handled Roy x Keeley was awful, but still. It was, more or less, a nice episode in my opinion.

Mom city, 3x11, was written by both Jason and Brendan & I absolutely LOVE it for most part (especially if we ignore the entire 'forgive him' thing with Jamie's dad). Jamie-centric episode that I'll always cherish & it's a shame we didn't have more of those. Give Phil all the awards. Love love LOOOVEEE IIITTT. Even better, give Jamie his own spin-off and invite Phil back as Jamie. (But then again, the fear of them bringing James back into Jamie's life and showing it as a good thing... The fear is Real.)

However, how could all Jason, Joe, and Brendan together write and release 3x12 as is is beyond me. How could they give us all those parallels, all that build up, only for it to ruin it in the finale? Jamie and his dad, Beard and Jane, the weird triangle thing that before this was mostly presented as ot3 but suddenly turned in the dumbest possible '2 people are chasing another same one' and Roy & Jamie both being OOC as HELL. Even ot3 aside, what was that bar talk? Jamie would never. Then at Keeley's house and Roy that's 'been working his ass off for the past year' but actually regressed to the point of BEFORE we see him in s1. He was presented as mentally mature in s1. I understand that he's jealous and insecure, but getting back to throwing punches at your best friend trying to convince himself/believing that after one night stand (that was VERY poorly addressed in 3x10 and 3x11 in my opinion) you're getting back together with your ex when she's been turning you down again and again? After that misogynistic comment about "But she's a woman, so you never know." WHO wrote that and why? Who allowed this to appear in the actual episode? And don't give me the "He's only human" treatment, he was always human but he never treated Keeley that shitty. He was better than that from the beginning. Or is it just me who wanted him to be better? Plus, Roy attacking Jamie after KNOWING what Jamie went through and how awful it is for him.

Before TL there was a show that I loved very much, but it disappointed me to the point that I started hating it, dropped it before the last season aired, and blacklisted it everywhere. I won't name it, but the writers were absolutely awful and treated the fans and the main gay ship like clowns. Typical Cis White Guys behavior towards their own characters and writing them as OOC as possible. I was very afraid this might happen to TL but was hoping that it won't. After 3x12? You guys. All my trust into their writing and believing in knowing what they're doing completely disappeared.

I am gutted bc of how much this show means to me and how it helped me through the darkest time in my life, but also... Are we sure we want more? Are we sure we trust them to continue this with these characters? I can kinda imagine the female football team, but to continue with all of our favs?

Mmm, I'm not sure about that, guys. Are you?

[tewwor]

whats your take on common nanami ships and higu ships. ex: gojo & nanami, higuruma & sukuna, etc. basically anything you can think of. like them? hate them? any particular biases or interests? feel free to talk about some of your favorite ships too

a sweet treat! — unprompted

gesp ... anon, i'm hugging you so tightly. thank you for sending this!! not entirely sure what's considered as a rarepair at this point since ... i consider all of these as genuine pairings lel. not going to put this under a readmore but i'll tag it with long post tw

gojo x nanami: i see it! i think there's a lot of meat to their relationship in particular even outside of romance. they attended jjt in the same period, and there's ... only so many of them, y'know? and even past nanami's hiatus from being a sorcerer — it's shown how their dynamic hasn't changed. and i think, if you take into consideration how there's only so many of them left from either class ... yeah, there's a definite bond between the two. even if their mannerisms couldn't be more different. i think they're fun!

higuruma x sukuna: okay, i'm going to be So fr and perhaps controversial. sukuna wasn't ... the most compelling character to me throughout the series :-| BUT my eyes have been opened / i do appreciate him through the depictions from my wonderful mutuals. i understand now. but i do think that they're dynamic is interesting! you have this ancient Big Bad and this middle aged dude that was just turned not normal. and they duke it out???? life or death? not to mention how much potential higu has already? i get it! i get the interest!! and i specifically like to circle around plots that have to do with higu being pushed further. develop new ways and perfect his ct. also, i think it brings out a new level of indulgence and greed from higu? at least, that's how i write him :-)

nanami x haibara: end me :-) i say that with much love and many, many tears. i think it's good. romance aside, they mesh incredibly well. even with what gege said about how they were the only two in that class. it's clear, to me at least, how much they genuinely cared about each other beyond that. they're almost opposites and compliment each other to the nth degree!!

nanami x higuruma: ah … yeah …. just two fellers doing their best in this corporation rat race :-) what's there not to like? sure, they're in different practices in Normal Human Society, but they share the same values. even have similar personalities. and i think that it's especially interesting with how observant both of them are / what they do with the information gleaned from one another. it's a 100/10 for me, but i'm super biased with office workers just figuring out life + anyone else that happens to pile into it.

higuruma x kusakabe: yeah .... they had like only a handful of panels together, but hey — it'll do. again, i'm incredibly biased, but i do think it's a very, very good pairing. they're just another pair of fellers that are living life. and i think it's especially noteworthy how kusakabe's shown how ready he is to lay down his life to protect higu in battle & ( this is highly influenced with my interpretation of higu ) how higu is willing to continue to live life instead of simply ... not. one of my top favs and i can yap for an eternity, thnkx.

nanami x ijichi: okay, i think this one's a rarepair! then again, everything with ijichi sort of is howighaiowg. anyways. i've been thinking about this lately and it makes me realize that ijichi can almost be like a catalyst in genuine healing for nanami. in the sense that they can actually talk about the hardships sorcerers have. how they both care immensely for the students. and while nanami exhibits a great amount of care for his colleagues and students — who cares for him? who holds space for him that's open enough for him to actually talk about more emotionally difficult situations? i think ijichi does/can/will. and ijiachi's often seen as a fretful, soft person but no one can deny how much he cares. and tbh? i think it takes a lot of strength to be able to sit with someone struggling with their mental state / emotions, but also figure out ways that actually benefit them. anyways. love em.

[khrysostomos]

You asked for a Jally rant, so i'm here to give it to you! Also, thank you for your response, it was very helpful. As I start to settle in more on the Tumblr side of Dalpony (unlike my scurrying and scavenging under anon for the past year or so), i'll keep everything you said in the back of my head.

When it comes to Jally-- (or even Purly, which is another random ship that is just Dalpony but if Dallas was a Shepard and 14? 15? I can't remember how old Curly is. I personally don't hate it and can see the appeal of it, since it's literally just little kids taking Dallas, slapping everything about him on Curly, and then getting mad when you tell them that they are basically Dalpony shippers. Anyways, Purly is practically everyone's OCxCanon ship but it's cute sometimes nonetheless) --it feels like everyone is just writing what they wished was the case, instead of the real reality that Dallas and Johnny's relationship is. Which is fine, considering that is how ship works, but when it comes to Jally it's so hard to make them work in any way that isn't completely out of character. I'm not the biggest Jally enjoyer out there, I don't go out of my way seeking it, and when I do find it I can't find myself enjoying it, but it all just feels like nobody understands or even cares for who Dallas and Johnny actually are when they are written into ship formation.

It feels like everyone gives Johnny and Dallas this whole "soft boy x cold boy" relationship, this "I can fix him" mindset, and write them as if they could live a somewhat normal life together. Johnny sees Dallas as someone he isn't in canon, someone to idolize, and some could even argue that Johnny is dependent on him at times. Dallas doesn't see Johnny like that, he merely sees Johnny as someone who needs protecting (at most), maybe even a little brother. They could never live a normal relationship together because of how different their viewpoints are of one another, unlike with Dalpony.

Dalpony is possibly one of the best realistic relationships in this fandom, and the fact that it's practically canon in not only the book, but the movie as well (We all saw that Matt. That wink you threw into Dallas' character directed towards Ponyboy surpasses platonic. There is no platonic or heterosexual explanation for the way that Dallas and Ponyboy act in the movie alone, it's why fandom treads over it instead of saying anything about it that is more than "Dalpony bad! Ponyboy hates Dallas!") goes to show that there is so much more to these characters than what meets the eye. Everyone takes The Outsiders at face value and that's why we get so much uncharacteristic and OC content in this fandom in general.

Anyways, just a bit of a snip towards Jally shippers, but if Dallas loves Johnny so much as you say, why'd he give Ponyboy his jacket? Why was Ponyboy his last word? Yeah he might have killed himself over Johnny (which I could argue was more over him feeling like he failed Johnny than a "oh my boyfriend died, guess I'll die." moment.) but he said PONY'S name, not Johnny's.

Ah this is getting too long of a ramble, I apologize. I don't have anyone to rant about Dalpony with so once it hits the page I just keep going lol! Also, I saw that you were being jumped by the toxic side of the fandom not too long ago, and it had me thinking. You stick to your side of the fandom and rarely step out of it, the only way anyone could really find you is if they were deliberately seeking out Dalpony content, so, hi hidden Dalpony fans.

i'm so glad that ask helped you, anonnie! and never worry about length cause, this entire ask is this gif in the best way:

i do try and stay to my side of things cause i don't have the energy/patience for the wank cycles this website/fandom goes through and i just got very tired of people being a dick. sticking to a small part of fandom with a bunch of other like minded people is best.

but. go the fuck off anon because you're right on several points, let me break out the bullets points:

you are on the money about purly shippers. i think purly shippers are partially hostile because a part of them knows this and because they also can't own up to the fact that they don't even read the canon that actually features curly in it. they just make it a watered down version of dalpony and get mad at you if you actually say this. it's also not uncommon for me to hear purly people switch to dalpony either, which also is a factor.

oc/canon and what basically is canon oc/canon shipping def occurs in this fandom to several degrees, absolutely. (i consider purly this, and same for darry/paul which the musical fandom is going nuts over) i think it's in fact prevalent more than ever due to the not so great encouragement of fandoms being encouraged to "throw out canon" mingled with a lot of the, uh, ages of fandom. a lot of youngers don't seem comfortable writing fully fleshed out characters but also get mad if you say, "those are more canon ocs than actual canons."

what you said about re: jally is basically something i've been thinking about for a long, long time. literally sitting up here cackling while reading this cause it's spot on.

a lot of jally fans really do run on that sort of made up dynamic and the idea of having johnny "fix" dallas and they're very proud of this mindset in a way i do not understand in it's appeal. i don't like the idea you have to "fix" someone in fiction to love them, nor do i like the way it's been portrayed on that side of the fandom with that dynamic. i do think that they're picking up on something narratively — that johnny does have a certain moralistic viewpoint he pushes on others, absolutely. they're also more johnny fans than dallas fans at the end of the day, so they take it to be a good thing that dallas should be "changed" for johnny.

there's no challenging. they just agree with it, and they like that made up dynamic, and it's a dynamic that doesn't work. and you're also right about the idolization! one thing that dalpony really hits on is that ponyboy doesn't do that. he sees dallas as who is, who he is. and the jally contingent doesn't like that in a way that's baffling! they want dallas to not be that.

i will also say this: they're at a huge disadvantage here which is why i think they have to do as you said in the last ask, do a lot of oc work with a few lines. it's a story told from one point of view, and there are no solidly one on one moments between dallas and johnny. we never seen them alone. but. even with other adaptations, you would think they would offer more. there's a whole sole jally scene in the musical but it didn't bring anyone else int, really, to the ship! most people came out thinking of them as brothers and i think that proves the point here. the oc work just is never very strong, and it's never very interesting due to them being yoked up to a particular Any Two Guys dynamic rather than something specific like dalpony or any other fleshed out characters.

and it is deeply unrealistic towards them both. the jay mountain scene/argument in the car proves it.

MATT'S WINK MAKES NO HETERO OR PLATONIC IN ANY SENSE. okay hold on: i have had a theory for awhile that most dalpony shippers are movie people. i do not think that is a bad thing; i think at points that the movie is better than the novel, even and i think matt was the best possible dallas ever. and that wink is straight up flirting with ponyboy. people pretend it didn't happen and you're right that a lot of jally people talk shit about the movie cause the movie is pretty close to dalpony canon — and they can be a hater as much as they want but fuck 'em.

that wink, that church moment is crazy in how flirtatious it is and how openly it is. i also think that the movie was done in some ways to intentionally push dallas and ponyboy's relationship to the forefront more. as much shit as people talk, se hinton was involved in every moment of the film. she wrote it, she had some say in the casting, she worked with the boys and their performances. the fact that the only unreliable narrator moment is dallas' death that made it into both cuts is so significant! it is not a betrayal to the text; it is an enhancement that i think should be paid attention to even more for what it says to dallas and ponyboy.

the face value stuff is exhausting from the soc apologia (if i see one more "oh bob was JUST A BOY!" post i will lose it) to just pretending there's nothing there with dallas and pony is infuriating. when it comes to it being canon, i'm fine with ambiguity of ponyboy not realizing he has a crush. what i'm not fine with is people going "oh he hates dallas soooo much!" cause if ponyboy didn't love and care for dallas... we would not have canon. ponyboy wouldn't have put pen onto paper without love and affection for dallas. he just doesn't make dallas into someone dallas wouldn't want to be seen as. i feel that's ignored a lot; dallas didn't want to be seen as soft or seen as someone who is easily digestible or nice. he wanted to be seen as a real person, flaws and all. particularly his flaws. why wouldn't pony honor that?

tl;dr:

[221bshrlocked]

taste you on my tongue

Pairing: The Mandalorian (Din Djarin) x Reader

Words: 9441 (I can’t fucking write anything shorter I’m sorry)

Warnings: Angst and Smut. Helmet is on and then it’s off. Oral (male receiving). Soft then rough sex. Breeding kink. Touch kink. Hand kink? Dirty/Sweet Talk. Mando feels primal when he sees you wearing his shirt and flirting with someone that isn’t him.

Summary: The Revenant was a fairly spacious gunship compared to others and you prided yourself in keeping it running for this long, especially after you were told it would soon lose its “life force.” But when a certain Mandalorian and his foundling join your ship following a disastrous mission, you find that the Revenant isn’t as big as you initially thought. In fact, it is much less private than you wish to admit and you find yourself escaping to a cantina one night to avoid the bounty hunter who isn’t aware of the effect he has on you. The problem is, the Mandalorian doesn’t like to share anything with anyone, and that rule applies to you. Unfortunately (or perhaps luckily) for you, you learn about this rule the hard way.

A/N: I hope yall like these because I’m currently spiraling down a Din Djarin hole and I’m not remotely apologetic. Let me know how it is in the comments and how I can make the smut better or the characterization better. Please, I can’t improve unless yall tell me what I’m doing wrong. Also, I promise to write more smut than angst next time. Enjoy :) And @purple-mango​ sorry it wasn’t as rough as you probably hoped, I was feeling soft Din but mark my words, the next one will be rough.

The obnoxious laughter coming from one of the corners of the cantina made you shake your head as the tavern-keeper approached you and motioned towards your glass. He smiled when you enthusiastically nodded and held out the finished drink, silently asking him to pour some more of the Tevraki whiskey because there was nothing you wanted more than to forget the past few months.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. There was something, or rather someone, that you wanted more than your need to set aside what’s been going on since that shitshow of a showdown on Tatooine. Coincidentally, or perhaps ironically, that someone had to do with what happened on the desert planet. You smiled at the man in front of you who knew better than to argue about how many drinks you’ve downed thus far. 

As the thoughts slithered back to the source of your frustration, you couldn’t help but let your eyes take in your surroundings, shamelessly hoping to find someone who could fill that deep-seated need seeping through your chest and into your heart. No one would compare to him of course, and you knew that very well. But you couldn’t stand another hour on that ship without scratching that itch that’s been bothering you ever since he joined your ship with that annoyingly cute green goblin. You took a sip and returned your attention to the man wiping down the counter in front of you, already thinking of just skipping all the pleasantries and going back to his place.

“If you point him out to me, I can pay him a visit later and roughen him up a bit.” He leaned over and pointed behind you, pouring himself a shot of some weird blue drink before moving in closer to you again.

“Sorry?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, not understanding what he was referring to or if you had even begun a conversation with him.

“The sleemo that rejected you sweetheart. Why else would you be drowning in my best stuff?” He winked at you and you barely managed to not visibly gag at the ways his eyes raked over your form. Did he think this was the way to flirt?

“Maybe I just love drinking liquid fire, sweetheart. Have you thought of that?” You hoped you weren’t being too sarcastic with him because if there was the slightest chance of getting laid tonight, then you were going to do everything in your power to take it and run considering how there was no chance of you asking your now-permanent “roommate” for those kinds of services. 

“Maybe. Either way, I’d love to help you forget about that sucker.” You took a deep breath and willed yourself to not punch him in the eye because the thought of being able to forget about the beskar-clad bounty hunter, even for a few hours only, sounded incredibly pleasant.

“Oh aren’t you sweet? So selfless and confident too.” You forced a smile before downing the rest of the whiskey and tapping on the glass again. If you were going to get fucked by someone like him, you needed at least three more drinks or else you wouldn’t be able to imagine the Mandalorian in his place. You chuckled at the depressing thought because here you were trying to forget about the man himself and yet went out of your way to make sure you were sort of able to pretend he was the one showing you the stars. 

“Believe me darling, my intentions are strictly...honorable.” He poured you another drink and took a shot with you, his eyes widening in shock when you didn’t bother to wait another second before downing the whole glass in one go. 

“Damn baby, he hurt you that bad?” You raised an eyebrow at his inquiry and didn’t know why the question bothered you so much. As much as you hated to admit it, the answer was a hard yes. 

“Hah, hurt doesn’t even begin to cover it. And you know what the worst part is? He doesn’t even know he’s doing it.” You didn’t bother to ask him for another drink, jumping on top of the counter before leaning down and grabbing the whiskey bottle from the shelf right in front of his knees. 

“You mean he’s still here?” He didn’t question your behavior, letting you take a long sip from the bottle before smiling down at your dazed expression. 

“Here. There. Everywhere. He’s fucking everywhere all the damn time. I...he’s- maker...I can’t get him out of my kriffing mind. And the funny thing is, he probably doesn’t waste a second of thought on me. I’m just...someone with a fucking ride that can get him from one planet to the next.” You traced random patterns on the cold tile of the counter and didn’t realize that someone had occupied the seat just opposite of you and trying his hardest to ignore the way the patrons across the room continued to stare at you like you were a piece of meat. 

“Darling, he isn’t worth your time. You need someone that...appreciates you. Tells you how good you’ve been.” You knew the man in front of you was just saying those lovely things to get in your pants but you couldn’t help the next few words from stopping even if you tried.

“Yes...gods, yes. Yes I do. But I wanted him to appreciate me. I wanted him to tell me how good I’ve been. I can’t blame him for not bothering to thank me though because it’s hard for him to hold a conversation longer than five minutes. I get that, he’s not used to it, he hasn’t needed to for so long. But it wouldn't hurt to acknowledge me every once in a while you know. I mean, do you know anyone else who’d willingly put their entire life on hold just to help some random introvert and his child find their way through this kriffing shithole of a system?” You knew you shouldn’t be saying any of those things out loud, let alone to a complete stranger. But he struck a nerve and you couldn’t take not another minute of not telling anyone how you truly felt. You needed to get some things off your chest and you sure as hell weren’t about to complain to the man waiting for you back on the ship.  

“And- and do you know anyone that would readily give up their most valuable position in this world to a stranger they just met? I don’t.” You violently shook your head at him and felt your eyes fill with tears when you saw the way the man was looking at you. His eyes shot down to the bottle in your hand and you unceremoniously raised it to your lips before taking a long swig of the burning liquid, hoping by some miracle that this was enough to make you forget all about his stupid strut and his annoyingly low and gruff voice and the way he was so effortlessly kind to the kid.

“That ship. It’s- oh gah, it’s been with me through the worst fucking jobs. I fought for it, almost sold my kriffing bo-...almost sold something priceless to ensure it isn’t taken from me again. And it only takes some damn beskar-wearing, quiet, fucking who-knows-what-species nerfherder to save me once for me to voluntarily hand it over to him. Like it wasn’t a piece of me...like it wasn’t my home.” You were over sharing at this point and you noticed the way the man was beginning to lose interest in you  so you made sure to grab his shirt and pull him closer to you before grabbing his forearm and digging your nails into it to keep his attention.

“Have you heard of the Revenant? You must have heard of the Revenant. There is no way you haven’t-”

“Yes, yes. I’ve heard of it.” He was exasperated but continued to attend to you, shamelessly letting his eyes follow a drop of whiskey roll down your shirt in between the valley of your breasts. You fixed your posture, pushing your tits together and giving him an eyeful of skin before ranting to him again.

“That’s my baby. My pride and joy. I always made sure everyone at the dock knew who it belonged to. Know why?” You grabbed his hand and pulled on it to make sure he was listening to you, laughing when he tiredly leaned down and forced himself to look away from your sweaty chest to your eyes. 

“Enlighten me sweetheart.”

“Because it’s one of the biggest gunships out there. So much space that I don’t actually use. It’s a fucking beauty...but you know what? It’s all a lie. A sad, unfortunate lie. Because it took me spending the better half of the year with that kid and his tincan of a guardian to realize just how small it is. It’s like he put his mark on every corner of my home on purpose...just to drive me insane. Every time I sit somewhere where I’m sure he wouldn’t bother to come to, I’d still smell that- that...that fucking scent of his that I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what it is.” You had thankfully placed the whiskey bottle away from you and didn’t try to fight the tavern-keeper when he took it and put it back on the shelf, instantly returning to you to make sure you weren’t about to break anything.

“I even gave him my room. My room! Because ‘no one can see my face’ so he needs some privacy away from me but then there’s the whole ‘the child stays with me all the time’ and that womp rat can sleep in the little cot in my room with him while also giving him some privacy. Which leaves me, you guessed it, in the shitty lower deck where there is no door, not even a curtain, to give me some semblance of solitude.” You didn’t realize how harshly you were breathing until you stopped speaking and noticed the way the stranger continued to look at you. 

“It has been a literal hell not being able to get myself off because he can walk in on me at any given moment. Picture that, not getting off for almost a year while being forced to remain in the same vicinity as him.” You didn’t care when you saw the man almost choke on his drink at your bold admission and looked around to make sure no one heard you. “Ughh, you’ve been such a good boy listening to me whining all night long and I think you deserve a treat.” You knew you had him as soon as he shivered at the way your fingers moved beneath his shirt and scratched his neck. “You look like the kind of guy that could fuck me within an inch of my life. Right?”

“Ah huh. Y-yeah.” He licked his lips before setting down the towel in his hands and inching closer towards you. And you silently swore at how absolutely pathetic he was because not a minute ago, he was trying to find a way out of this conversation and here he was thinking with his probably-disappointing dick. 

“Good. And I promise to make it worth your while if you manage to make me forget his name.” You leaned across the counter and were about to kiss him when you saw something move across your peripheral vision, something that looked oddly familiar to your completely hazed mind. 

“And what’s his name, baby? So I make sure you can’t rememb-” Before he could finish whatever he was about to say, you felt a large hand wrap around your upper arm and pull you back from the bartender and off of the stool. You almost tripped as you struggled to stand and huffed in anger before raising your voice to the distinguished individual who thought this was the time to fuck with you. 

“Hey what are y-” You were about to take a swing at whoever it was currently bruising your arm when you followed the glint of the familiar metal and were met with your reflection staring right back at you. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you blinked in confusion a few times at the visor currently tilted in an almost judgemental manner at you before attempting to wipe your hair with your other hand.

The Mandalorian slowly changed his focus to the man behind the bar and threw a few credits at him, hands immediately lowering to the blaster in his side holster when he saw where the tavern-keeper’s eyes moved towards. The stranger could only hold up his hand in defeat before walking towards the other side of the bar to lick his invisible wounds. The Mandalorian’s helmet turned to the rest of the cantina, daring anyone to approach the two of you before you left. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to follow the two of you as you returned to the Revenant. He could feel his patience withering away with every passing moment you decided to share what’s on your mind with the rest of the universe but him. 

“Let me go.” You whispered to him, eyes maintained to the ground and cringing when you felt his hold on your arm tighten at the request. Before you could ask him again, Mando was turning around and walking out of the busy cantina, pulling you along with him aggressively and not leaving any room for negotiation. You winced as he pulled you like a child through the streets, avoiding the concerned and intrigued looks you were receiving. He was much taller than you and you laughed when you realized it must have been a sight to see some random woman getting dragged along by an angry bounty hunter. Mando couldn’t help but turn towards you when he heard your giggles break the silence, his annoyance spiking because there was absolutely nothing humorous about this situation. 

You noticed the way he was staring at you and decided to quiet down, swallowing the lump in your throat as the cold air hit your sweaty skin and made you shiver. 

As you moved closer to the ship, you realized there was a chance he heard what you had to say about him and your ship. Hurt and anxiety rose up your throat and before you could attempt and control the all too familiar feeling, you were tripping over your feet and falling to the ground, instantly vomiting everything you’d managed to eat and drink in the last couple of hours. 

The Mandalorian hoped his obviously misplaced outrage wasn’t what led you to such a violent reaction, and he kneeled down immediately to hold your hair away from your face. When he saw tears falling down your cheeks and how hard you were breathing beneath him, something snapped in his chest and he knew he was definitely the reason behind this severe response. 

“Don’t- oh gah….kriffing look at me.” You spat in between words and turned away from him, holding onto your stomach and to the grass beneath you as you continued to empty your stomach in the middle of the forest. At least you weren’t in the city anymore. 

“We’re close to the ship,” he didn’t know what else to say and chose to state the obvious instead, afraid of using a harsher tone with you. Actually, he did know what to say, he just didn’t trust himself to speak the words out loud yet.

“Wopty fucking doo for-” once again, you opened your mouth and dry heaved until you were sure there wasn’t a single drop of whiskey in your system, “you and your stupid kriffing-” 

“Please Ad'ika, let me-” You visibly shook at the familiar endearment you’ve heard him whisper to the child so often when he thought you weren’t around. It hurt to know he was throwing it around as if he wasn’t twisting the knife inside your heart with every breath he took near you. 

“Let m-me go, p-please.” Mando’s sudden intake of breath was as loud as the silence engulfing the two of you and you swallowed your pride before looking into his visor, well aware of how awful you must have looked without the reflection staring back at you. He, on the other hand, grasped in that moment just how deep your words in the cantina were and instead of listening to you and allowing you a moment alone, he took a deep breath before softly pushing back your hair and wrapping one arm around your waist. You didn’t have any time to question him as the other went beneath your thighs and before you knew it, you were holding onto his cowl for dear life as he quietly walked up the ramp of the Revenant with you in his arms. 

Mando pushed in the code to shut the hatch before making his way through the quiet halls of the ship, reaching hi- your room and going straight to the bed he has occupied in the last few months. As he put you down, he took notice of your body language and knew instantly how self-conscious you must have felt laying on the bed he’s been using since he joined you. The same bed which you sort of commented about not an hour ago. He watched as you forced a smile as soon as you saw the familiar green little womp rat peeking its head right before descending from the safety of his crib and wobbling towards you. 

You tried to leave the bed but Mando was ahead of you, gently pushing your shoulder until you realized there was no room for arguing with him. Leaning down, he took the kid and put him back in the crib before telling him he couldn’t cuddle with you tonight. 

You kept your hands clasped together and refused to look at him, eyes taking in the room no longer familiar to you. He’d moved things around, even put things away that he didn’t need. Your gaze shifted towards him unintentionally as you saw him approach you with a cup of water and wet towel. Pushing the covers towards you, he sat near your thighs as he handed you the water and began to softly wipe at your cheeks and forehead. 

You shut your eyes out of fear of giving more away just by staring at his visor and Mando thanked the stars you had because he wasn’t sure he could truly look at you if they were still open. It was a ridiculous thought because he was wearing a mask and you’d never know how much he loved committing all those little muscle twitches to memory. But it felt strangely intimate to return your gaze and he didn’t want to make you any more uncomfortable tonight. 

You sighed heavily at his touch and felt pathetic at how starved you were for anything that had to do with him. The man was wearing gloves and wasn’t technically trailing his fingers over your skin but it still felt difficult to contain yourself.

When he was done, he stood up and moved to the refresher, giving you a few moments alone before he imposed on you again. You gulped down the water and placed the cup on the floor near you, looking out of the large window to your right and noticing the dark blue skies moving slowly above you. It took you a few minutes to recognize that what you were feeling was no longer hurt but confusion. He’s acted so differently tonight and you hated to think it was because he was pitying you. It didn’t matter anymore whether he’d heard what you said about him or not. He would have found out sooner or later, and if you were being honest, you felt like he probably had some inclination for a while before but chose to not bring any attention to the topic to save you from embarrassment and rejection.

“Get some rest.” You turned towards him again, not realizing he’d come back into the room and was standing right beside you. Mando tried his hardest not to give away any of his thoughts but you knew what he was thinking as soon as you saw his helmet tilt down just below your neck. 

When you followed his line of sight, you felt ill again but for a completely different reason. Of course this would get worse. You weren’t planning on seeing him tonight and you told yourself you’d have plenty of time to change out of his shirt but it seemed that the universe was not making this any easier on you. Mando couldn’t stop staring at the shirt wrapped so loosely around your smooth skin and how large it looked on you. If he was a decent man, he would have turned away when he saw you shifting uncomfortably under his gaze but he couldn’t help taking in the way your body seemed to react to his presence and before he could think about it, he was stepping closer to the bed and reaching out to touch the material of his shirt falling down your shoulder.

“I- I’m sorry about your s-” The words died in your throat when you felt his gloved fingers trailing down your exposed clavicle and you were torn between asking him what he was doing and letting him carry on without interrupting his curiosity. Mando barely held himself back from pushing you down into the covers and taking what he now knew was his but he noticed the sudden goosebumps erupt on your skin and finally managed to meet your eyes through the visor. The way you were returning his gaze was perhaps too much for him and he flinched away from you, clearing his throat and willing himself to think of anything else but the way you were practically begging him to take you. You parted your lips to say something but couldn’t find your voice, afraid you’d push him more than he could take and drive him away all together. 

“It’s fine. It’s...I don’t mi- forget about it. You need to rest.” He spoke softly before walking towards the cot nearby and pushing the crib out of the door. 

“Wh-where will you sleep?” You sat up and knew he noticed how much you were holding onto every single interaction with him.

“Good night,” he didn’t bother to respond to the question, turning off the lights and shutting the door behind him before making his way to the cockpit. You sat in silence for a few moments before slithering under the covers, sighing in annoyance when you noticed just how much this entire room smelled like him. Pushing your face into the pillow, you took a deep breath and felt shaken to the core when you were hit with Mando’s distinctive scent: sweat, beskar, and that damn featherfern wash he somehow found every time you flew by Nevarro. 

As you looked out the metal blinds, you tried to brace yourself for the conversation you were most definitely going to have with the Mandalorian the next day. You knew for a fact that whatever decision he’d take will ultimately hurt you because there were really only two options available, one of which involved him and the child leaving and the other would lead to them staying but making things awkward since there was not a single chance he would reciprocate your feelings. 

And the worst part was, you weren’t sure which was more painful.

The Mandalorian sat quietly in the cockpit for a while, making sure you were asleep so as to not wake you up as he moved through the Revenant. Seeing that the kid was fast asleep, he found himself leaving the small space and navigating to the lower deck. He passed by your room and noticed the lights were off, sighing in relief at knowing that you were finally resting comfortably. Arriving at the lower deck, he stood at the entrance of the large room and felt his chest tighten once he took in the state of the space. Turning on the lights, he immediately noticed your makeshift cot in the far right corner, unable to stop himself from moving towards it to inspect it. He shook his head in anger but this time it was aimed at himself and not you or the random tavern keeper who couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. 

How did he not know of this arrangement? And why did he not ask about your sleeping situation the day he joined your ship? Was he truly that unconcerned with anyone else but the kid or was it because he was reluctant to listen to Peli when she recommended you?

He’d only been in the lower deck for a few moments yet he felt his skin crawl with goosebumps. It was awfully cool down here and it took him another ten seconds to acknowledge that you’ve been living and sleeping here for this long without complaining once to him. 

Everything you said about him earlier tonight crashed into him like a wave of guilt and he couldn’t stay in the room any longer, making his way back to the upper deck to try and figure out what he would say to you come tomorrow. As he slowly moved through the dark hallways of the Revenant, he heard a faint voice coming from the upper deck, muscles tensing instantly when he walked past your room and noticed you weren’t on the bed.

Not wanting to disturb you, he waited right outside the cockpit and listened to you humming to the child. He must have woken up and found his way back to you. As he crossed his arms and stood behind the door, he couldn’t help but notice how soft your voice was as you continued to sing a lullaby to the little womp rat. 

How could he have not noticed…

“There you go, you little green goblin. If only I could sleep as quickly as you.” You whispered to him before tucking him into the crib while continuing to rub his abnormally large ears. “Your dad is really funny...thinking I’d be able to sleep in that room with his scent all over it.” 

Maker, how were you so forthright with everyone but him? It hurt to know that he wasn’t someone you could whisper your little secrets to. Then again, it made sense since all of your secrets seemed to involve him.

“I pray he doesn’t tell me he has to leave now that he knows I...ughh, for both of our sakes little one.” Mando noticed the way you seemed incapable of finishing your sentences whenever you spoke about him and a deep part of him wished you would, if only to hear the adoration in your words. Rarely anyone spoke of him so softly and he had a feeling he’d only ever accept such words from you. It was quiet for a few minutes before he heard you whisper to the kid again. 

“It just hurts to know that he’ll never see me as...as a-” He wasn’t sure if it was the heartbreaking tone of your voice or if it was the way you were reluctant to say your heart’s desire out loud but Mando couldn’t stand another second of you thinking you weren’t important to him.

“As a what?” His voice came out harsher through the vocoder and he winced at himself when he vaguely heard you jumping from the chair. A soft hiss came from the cockpit and he took a deep breath when he realized you’d just shut the crib and moved to leave the room. As you stepped out, Mando forced his eyes to remain on your face, refusing to look at your exposed legs or the way his shirt seemed to end right beneath your upper thighs.

Softly shutting the door, you walked to the opposite side of the room and knew the Mandalorian must have noticed your need to put as much space between the two of you as possible. 

“We need to stop running into each other like this,” you laughed awkwardly and anxiously ringed your fingers, glancing at his visor before turning away and looking everywhere else but him. Okay, so humor wasn’t going to get you out of this situation. 

“How’s your head?” You could feel how on edge he was and decided to answer with short and straightforward responses just to avoid any more awkwardness. 

“M-much clearer.” You stood in silence until you heard the Mandalorian pushing off of the opposite wall and heading towards you. You didn’t have anywhere to go, eyes snapping to the door right behind him and knowing there was no way you could try to walk around him.

He stopped a couple of feet away from you and you ceased to breathe when you noticed how awfully close he was to you. 

“Answer my question.” His voice was dangerously low and you found it difficult to try and think of anything to say when he was giving you no room to breathe. 

“I- I did?” Your voice was far from confident and you watched as he gently took off both of his gloves before shoving them into his pockets. Even though he willingly removed them in front of you, you didn’t allow yourself to look at his skin, afraid you’d somehow offend him and his Creed. But then you saw his hand move towards your face, and gasped when you felt his fingers tilting your chin so you were looking into his visor. There was not an inclination of an emotion available to you but you forced yourself to keep your eyes open nonetheless. 

“How do you want me to see you Mesh'la?” Mando whispered down to you and you swore his voice was hoarse as he spoke to you but you didn’t allow this moment to get to your head. It would hurt more than anything if…

“It d-doesn’t matter.” You blinked away the tears, wanting to wipe your face before anymore were shed but not finding it in yourself to move away from him. But then you felt his thumb softly rubbing at your wet skin, making you almost lose your composure as soon as he stepped closer in your space until your back hit the wall. 

“I’m sorry Cyar'ika,” his chest was inches from your face, cornering you beneath his other arm before leaning down and resting his forehead against yours. You couldn’t breath, not when he was suddenly filling all of your senses as if it was the most natural thing to do. He felt your tears roll around his thumb and couldn’t bear the thought of you crying because of him.

“I’m sorry for making you think you don’t matter...you do, not just to the kid but- but to me as well.” Your knees gave out on you as soon as you heard Mando’s confession, barely managing to grab onto his forearms right before buckling against him. The Mandalorian wasn’t sure if that was the kind of reaction he was looking for but he immediately wrapped his arms around your back and legs before pulling you against his chest. You nuzzled into his chest and kept a tight hold on him as he walked through the dimly lit hallways back to your room. He could feel goosebumps take over the skin of your thighs where he was touching you and tried to distract himself from pushing you down into the middle of the Revenant and taking you right then and there. You deserved more than that. 

As he reached the room and laid you on the bed, he felt your fingers clasp onto him harder and when his eyes trailed over your face, he knew you were silently begging him not to leave. 

“I’m not going anywhere Ad'ika.” His reassuring tone tugged at your heart and you swallowed the lump in your throat as you watched him walk to the door and shut it behind him before moving to the refresher. You heard him shuffle around and allowed your mind to calm down, knowing very well that Mando wasn’t unkind and wouldn’t lead you on just to leave you. But then he walked out without his beskar armor and you swore you died and joined the stars. His helmet looked odd without his normal clothing and you knew he could probably see you shamelessly ogling him from across the room. 

He walked to you and stood to the side, and you realized he was probably nervous. You pushed yourself against the wall and threw back the covers, hoping he’d understand what you wanted of him.

“Can I-”

“Please.” You cut him off before he could finish his question and he took a deep breath before laying on the bed and moving as close to you as possible. Before he could throw the covers over the two of you, you were already laying your head on his chest and wrapping an arm around him, fingers fisting into the soft material of his shirt unintentionally as you felt him relax beneath you.

You weren’t sure how long it’s been but you felt his heart rate finally come back to normal. Hoping you weren’t being too forward with him, you took his hand into yours and brought it to your lips, softly kissing his knuckles before turning his palm over to lay a kiss on his wrist. Mando was losing every ounce of control left in his body and his arm tightened around your back as soon as he felt the tip of your tongue against his hand. 

“Pfassk,” you flinched at the rough expletive and raised your head to look at him, finding his visor already tilted down towards you. “I- I’m sorry I’ll stop if-”

“No..n-no, don’t stop. It just- you took me by surprise.” His chest was rising and falling more rapidly and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was as affected by this new level of ‘intimacy’ as you were, if not more.

You felt bold at his request, kicking the covers away before sitting up and moving to straddle his thighs. Mando was breathing harshly and mirrored your actions, sitting up against the cool metal of the wall before laying his hands on top of your exposed thighs. He let himself take in the way your skin flushed under his touch and smiled to himself when he continued to inch his smooth hands over your upper thighs until his shirt rid up your legs and revealed the pastel color of your undergarment. 

“Cyar'ika…” He sighed when he finally forced himself to meet your eyes and found them dilated until there was barely any color left in them. You wanted to ask him what that word meant but chose to file it for later. Placing your hands on top of his, you smiled down at him before pulling them towards your lips and kissing his palms. Almost instantly, you felt him twitch against you, unable to control himself from bucking his hips against your heated core. You let go of his hands and laid your own on his chest, throwing your head back when you felt his tight grip on your thighs. You could tell he wanted to apologize but gave him no chance to do so, sliding against him until you were sure he was painfully hard beneath you.

“Maker...I- I could almost taste you on my tongue Mando. When you- you left me in here all by myself. I couldn’t sleep, n-not when I could smell you on these covers, not when I could feel you on my skin. I..gods, wanted to kiss you then, and- and I wanted to taste your- you...Please, c-can I? P-please-” You dug your nails into his chest and heard him throw his head back against the wall with every confession you moaned to him. He was never this unhinged and you wished to see him come absolutely undone at your touch.

“A-are you sure?” It pained him to ask but he needed to be sure that you wouldn’t regret this. Regret him. 

“Mando, have you not listened to anything I’ve said tonight?” As much as you hated to remind him of the earlier and rather embarrassing events, you wanted him to know just how much he meant to you. You knew he was reluctant to let this relationship move forward and you couldn’t really blame him. This was all new to him. But you also didn’t want to stall, not when the two of you have become so aware of the other’s feelings.

You continued to rub yourself on him, shaking with anticipation when you heard him moan through the vocoder as you pressed yourself more confidently down on him. 

“Mesh'la I-” Without warning, you took one of his hands and pushed it to your lips, slowly taking two of his fingers into your mouth and swirling your tongue around them until his moans grew louder. And when he pushed his fingers deeper into your mouth, you gripped his wrist tightly and groaned, making sure he could feel how much you wanted him. 

“Y-you’re killing me sweet girl.” He wanted to loosen his hold on you, to take things slow, to not let himself get carried away with you, but he didn’t find it in himself to be gentle because he could feel how wet and needy you were above him and there was no way he was going to waste another second not being close to you.

“Please Mando, I want you, n-need to have you. I can make you feel so good. Please, can I?” You reached down and cupped him through his pants, finding him as hard as the beskar of his armor. He thrust up into your hand and swore violently before taking his hand away from your mouth and fisting it into your hair. You smiled when you felt him push you off of him, whispering something in Mando’a when he saw you pulling his pants down his thighs and throwing them behind you. 

You bit your lower lip before moving off of the bed and pushing his legs along with you as well. Mando sat up and forced his hands to remain by his side, afraid his enthusiasm would make him get too rough with you and scare you away. When you laid your hands on his knees and pushed them wide open so you could get comfortable between his legs, Mando’s hands tightened around the covers and he hissed when he saw the way you were eyeing his cock. You were staring at him like he was a piece of meat and he wasn’t sure if he loved it or was embarrassed by it. 

“Maker,” you whispered before dragging your nails up and down his thighs, watching as his cock twitched against his stomach every time you got a little aggressive with your touches. Looking up into his visor, you slowly leaned down and took the tip of his cock in your mouth, humming around him as you tasted precum leaking into your taste buds. That seemed to do it for him because one of his hands shot to the back of your head and fisted into your hair while the other moved down until it landed on your hand. He intertwined his fingers with yours and watched as you pulled back and licked the underside of his dick before spitting into your hand and wrapping it around him.

“M-mando, the taste of you,” you took as much of him in your mouth as possible while maintaining eye contact with his helmet, squeezing the base of his cock before reaching down and cupping his balls. Mando swore, involuntarily thrusting into your mouth and watching in awe as he saw a dangerous glint in your eyes right before you clasped his hand harder and somehow managed to take him in deeper. It was such a sight, holding affectionately onto your hand as you brought him to pleasure. Letting go of him with a pop, you laid wet kisses down the length of his cock, licking the protruding veins and smiling when you felt his hold tighten on your hair. “Is absolutely addicting.” 

You could tell the exact second he lost all semblance of control because one minute you were kneeling at his feet, and the next thing you knew, Mando was pulling you up by your hair and throwing you beneath him on the bed. You wiped your lips with the back of your hand, watching his muscles flex as he removed his shirt expertly over his helmet. The soft starlight coming through the metal blinds of the window shone onto his skin and you trailed your gaze down his chest, finding the golden brown tone of his scarred body absolutely breathtaking. 

“Mando, you’re beautiful.” You saw his hands begin to shake at your compliment, and you knew you’d take every chance you get from now on to tell him how much you adored him. You could hear him breathing through the mask and licked your lips when he looked down and saw the way you were playing with the hem of his shirt. Slowly, you began to pull on the soft material, about to take it off when he held onto your wrists. Your smile faltered for a second and hoped you didn’t somehow misunderstand his intentions.

The last thing Mando wished to see was your body giving away to shyness before him. Pushing your thighs open, he didn’t give you a chance to say anything else as he slid his fingers below the thin undergarment, violently ripping it off of you and discarding it onto the floor. You gasped when you felt him hard and heavy against your slit, taking both of his hands and pulling him towards you until he was only a hairbreadth away. He watched closely as you placed one hand around your throat while the other descended to your breast. You could tell Mando was reluctant to move so much an inch and when you pushed yourself against him, eyes daring him to do as he wishes, he found himself completely overtaken with the thought of you belonging to him and him only. You smiled when you felt the grip on your throat tighten, shutting your eyes and arching your back against him as the other cupped and pinched at your nipples through his shirt. 

“If you want me to fuck you tonight, Mesh'la, then you’re going to keep my shirt on.” He could feel you shaking in his arms and smiled to himself at the knowledge of how much he affected you. 

“Mando, please…” You would have continued begging him if he asked you to, but then he was moving away from you and leaning towards the window. Keeping your hands clasped to your chest, you watched as he shut the blinds until there wasn’t a single light shining into the room. You could barely see your own hands in the dark and wondered why he was shuffling above you. A soft hissing sound had you tensing in an instant and you ceased to breathe when you heard the faint sound of beskar hitting the ground. 

“M-mando?” The question was more reluctant than inquisitive and you didn’t have time to react as you felt him lean against you until you were touching every inch of his skin. You blinked a few times in vain, knowing there was no way you would be able to see anything. But then you felt something soft brush against your cheek and as you turned your head towards him, Mando was molding his lips with yours, swallowing your gasps and sucking on your tongue as soon as you melted into him. He pulled away against his own will, but not before pushing your jaw with his nose until your neck was available to him.

“And my name is Din sweet girl, Din Djarin. It better be the only word you scream tonight as I fuck this pretty little cunt. Understood?” You weren’t sure if it was his deep voice that made you speechless or the fact that he not only took off his helmet for you but willingly told you his name as well. You committed it to memory, hoping this wouldn’t be the only time he took off his helmet around you. You’d always wondered what he sounded like without it, not comprehending that it could be so much sweeter than what you’ve dreamed of. And by the gods, his lips. How were they so soft and gentle? Maker, he had a stubble too, not a rough one but just long enough to tickle your neck as he kissed and nipped at your clavicle.

“Answer me Ad'ika.” He bit your shoulder to grab your attention once more, chuckling above you when you nodded frantically against him. 

“You’re so soft Cyar'ika, I- I want to kiss every inch of your skin.” As much as you loved making him lose his mind at your touch, you had to admit you enjoyed him much more when he was in control. You smiled when he kissed along your shoulder before pushing down his shirt far enough to expose your breasts. Din bit down on his lower lip to contain himself, but then you were arching your back and pushing yourself into him and he couldn’t hold back. He kissed down your sternum, waiting until you relaxed in his arms before assaulting your nipples. You screamed his name as you felt his teeth tug on your nipple, hands shooting to his hair when you felt him grope and pull on the other. 

“Din, oh ma-maker- your mouth is...f-fuck.” You could tell he was smiling as he aggressively licked the hardened bud before sucking on it again. Din pushed his cock against your wet slit, growling when you pulled on his hair and cried his name like a sweet prayer. 

“I could smell your cunt sweet girl, so fucking wet and hot and ready for me.” Din pulled back and cornered you between his arms, bucking his hips into you until you were a needy and moaning mess beneath him. “Woke up countless times in this bed...hard and aching at the mere thought of you...d-dreaming of having you in my arms, wanting to sink into you, f-fuck you on every inch of this ship.” 

“Din, please...I need you.” 

The way you clawed at his back broke him and before he knew what he was doing, he was flipping you on your stomach and raising your hips against him.

“I need to have you Mesh'la.” Din leaned down and swiped your hair to the side, whispering the filthiest things in your ears as he took hold of his cock and rubbed it against your heat. 

“I’m yours Din, do what you want. Fuck me, ruin me...cum in me if you wish. Just p-please-”

You made it sound so simple, trusting him. It was an odd feeling to know how easily you were giving yourself to him. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, not after what you said tonight. But something about the way you offered yourself to him, especially with that last request, had him seeing stars.

Leaning down until his chest was sliding against your back, the Mandalorian held you against him with one arm across your front while he slowly slipped into your wet cunt. You sighed in unison, and Din felt a sense of pride fill his chest when you dug your nails into his arm while your legs began to shake beneath him.

“You’re a dream Cyar'ika, the best f-fucking dream I could ever have. And you’re all mine.”

“Y-yes, yours. I’ve always been yours, oh gods Din please, move. M-move.” You were babbling at this point but couldn’t find it in yourself to care, turning your head to the side just to feel him breathe against your cheek. His stubble rubbed deliciously at your heated and sensitive skin, and you would tell him later that you hoped he’d mirror those actions but elsewhere.

“So tight darling, I- you’re everything. The things I- uhhh, the thing I want to do to you.” Din achingly pulled out before snapping into you again, biting down on your shoulder when you clenched violently around him. 

“Din, oh Din-” You wished you could tell him how good he felt, how much he filled you, how often you craved having him inside you and how much you were losing it now that he was. But you couldn’t find a single word, not when he was fucking you like you were it for him.

The normally quiet man was groaning and hissing above you, pulling you along with him as he sat up and continued to fuck you relentlessly. You reached back and held his head against your neck, crying in pain and pleasure when he picked up the pace and his hold on your hip tightened. You were sure there would be bruise marks the next day but you couldn’t tell him to slow down or be a little less aggressive, not when you finally had him where you’ve wanted for so long. 

“Fuck, fuck….sweet girl, did- did you mean it?” He was asking you something and you didn’t really pay attention to him, focusing on the way he deliciously dragged against your tight walls over and over again. Din knew it wasn’t fair to ask you anything right now but he had to know. Needed to.

He stopped his movement all together, sinking as deep into you as possible and tightening his grip on your throat. 

“Pfassk...answer me darling.” Din whispered into your ears and reached down to where you were joined, softly slapping your clit until you twitched and begged him to repeat his words again.

“I said, did you fucking mean it when- kriffing hell, when you said I could...c-cum in you?” He was reluctant to ask but there was no point in denying either of you. 

“Yes, gods yes. I told you Din, d-do what you want with me.” You forcibly loosened the fingers around your throat and brought them to your lips, biting the palm of his hand as he resumed thrusting into you. 

“Mesh'la...you’re such a sweet girl, letting me b-breed you...taking my cock so well, letting me fill you up. You were made for me darling. This cunt, this sweetest and tightest kriffing pussy was made for my cock.” He pronounced each word with a harsh push of his hips and you smiled when you heard how low his voice suddenly became. The sounds of skin slapping on skin filled the room and you hoped the child wouldn’t wake up from how loud the two of you were being. 

“You’re mine darling. Won’t let anyone else touch you...fucking look at you even. Maker I- I almost lost it tonight in the cantina.” There was a hint of self-consciousness in his words and you hoped he didn’t think you could ever replace him.

“D-din..” You wanted to tell him no one else would compare but he didn’t give you a chance. 

“Talking about me like I- fuck, like I didn’t care about you, like I don’t picture you coming on my cock every waking moment of my day. And flirting with him in my shirt...my kriffing shirt. I almost lost it when he put his hands on you sweet girl.” You weren’t sure if he had somehow become harder inside you or if it was his words that made you attuned to the feeling of him pushing into your cunt but you turned your head and kissed his cheeks, hoping he’d understand what you were trying to tell him with your touches. 

“You’re the only one f-for me.” Din let go of your neck and held onto your hips, no longer caring about how rough he was being with you. Your heavy sighs were the only warning he had right before your tight walls convulsed around his dick and he continued to fuck you through your orgasm, falling on top of you and bucking his hips slowly into your cunt until you begged him to slow down.

“Cyare, ah pfassk, that’s it. Keep squeezing me darling. I’m so close, so close. Ah fuck, you’re mine. Mine, not letting you go. N-never letting you go. Oh maker...ner runi...ner. Ner. Riduur. My sweet girl...riduur.” Din didn’t realize what he’d said until the words were left hanging in the air and he felt a rush of relief wash over him as he finally admitted how he felt about you. 

“Din, I lo- ahh gods please.” He silenced your screams with his hand, losing his rhythm as he came in hot spurts of cum inside you. Din bit down onto your shoulder just as you bit on the palm of his hand, continuing to push his seed deep inside you until he felt you a mixture of your juices seeping out of you. Neither of you moved for a few moments, relishing the way you fit so perfectly with each other. You could feel him breathing heavily against your back and smiled with pride when you realized you were the only one that got to see him like this. 

Din didn’t want to stop touching you, falling to the side and grabbing your flush to him only to hiss when you unintentionally clenched around his softening cock. You kissed his wrist as he pulled the covers over the two of you, not bothering to move a muscle mostly because you knew he didn’t wish for you to leave him.

He kissed along the bruised ridges of your shoulders, drawing circles on your navel and smiling when you giggled beneath him.

“I wasn’t too rough with you was I?” He asked embarrassingly, not knowing what he’d do if you said yes. 

“You were perfect Din...you- you are perfect.” You turned your head far enough in hopes of catching his attention, letting out a deep breath when he leaned over and captured your lips in a chaste kiss. He was so soft and you didn’t know which side of him you enjoyed more but you were sure you wanted to get to know him, all of him. His likes and dislikes.

“Far from it Mesh'la. I...I went to the lower deck and saw where you’ve been sleeping.”

“Oh…”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Din rose on his elbow, seeking your hands in the dark and holding onto your fingers as he raised your hand to his mouth and kissed along your hand. 

“I- I didn’t want to make you think you weren’t welcome. Peli told me about the Creed and well, there isn’t any sort of privacy down there really. And the kid would’ve been cold. I know how much he likes to cuddle next to you when he sleeps.” 

“But you’ve been-”

“I’ve slept in worse conditions, believe me.” He didn’t say anything else in response but you knew he was very much thinking about it. 

“Din, I wouldn’t change a single moment. Not one. Because each one led me here, to this bed, in your arms. I would relive every mission and every cold night and every awkward conversation again if I knew I’d end up here with you. You’re the closest thing I have to a..a-”

“Family.” He broke the silence before lying back down and pulling you as close to him as possible.

“Promise me you won’t get drunk by yourself in a cantina again.” You wished you didn’t laugh out loud at the random request because Din swore behind you before his grip loosened a bit.

“I’m sorry I...I didn’t mean to laugh. It’s just, here I am pouring my heart out and the only thing you could follow up with was that.” When he didn’t say anything in return, you grabbed his arm and pulled him back to you. “And yes, I promise not to get drunk in a cantina by myself ever again.”

“Good.”

“But I can’t really make any promises about not flirting with anyone because if it means I get to have you all hot and bothered then-”

“Sweet girl, you’re going to regret ever thinking of that…” 

Translations: 

Sleemo - This Huttese insult was pronounced slay-mo and translated as "slimeball," a rude insult.

Ad'ika - Little one

Mesh'la - Beautiful

Cyar'ika - Darling/Sweetheart

Pfassk - An adaptable expletive

Cyare - Beloved

Ner - Mine.

Runi - soul; only used poetically

Riduur - partner, spouse, husband/wife

[captainbobbin]

Ask game, TerraIsa or XemSai/XemIsa?

Thats a tough question. 

(long answer under the readmore :p)

The way I see it, they're both very similar - its a venn diagram of sorts, not just because Isa/Saix is in the centre. And I don't think I can pick just one over the other, because they're kind of rooted into one another.

For me, if you're doing moonrocks (Terra x Isa) stuff and doing it with some attachment to canon (as in, it isn't an au that's really out there) realistically there should be some element of XemSai in there somewhere. For Terra and Isa to connect in a (semi)canon way, I think there's gotta be some form of acknowledgement of 'oh yeah, Terra and Xemnas overlap one another in some ways, and Saix was connected to one and now potentially the other'.

I've shipped XemSai since KH2 came out;;; I was always super super into it. But then DDD happened, and there was the big Xehanort/possession reveal, and it kind of made me look at the whole relationship like 'Oh, this is for sure onesided. Like there is a powerplay going on here that is way deeper than a simple boss/employee' kind of thing.

I still love XemSai - as I hope you can all tell by the things I draw and write ahahah but I see it as a pairing as something kind of indulgent, physical and ultimately somewhat unhealthy. Neither of them are people, neither of them canonically get an eventual happy ending with the other, neither of them have real emotions. So as a relationship it's kind of parasocial - there's a sense of use, of gain, of just getting by and having the other near as a means of temporary comfort. Sure, in time they could have grown hearts and learned to love, but a large aspect of both characters is tragedy. Saix has been screwed over time and time again and is continuously at a loss, always letting aspects of himself go to waste and be ruined by others. Xemnas wants to be many things, wants to understand the heart, wants to figure things out and remember what love is like - but he can't. The two of them together don't make a whole - its all just a temporary fix that helps them forget the worst of it. Thats not even getting into the fact that Saix was actively trying to take the Org down from within.

I'm currently writing a piece which kind of looks at the relationship under the lens of 'what is real and what is fake anymore? How much of this is an act, and at what point did I just begin to go along with things? Why does it not bother me that my plans have changed, and now I see myself reluctant to let this person go?' and I think that is something I really like about XemSai. The basis of it all is just. Surviving. Doing what you have to. Seeking out what you can when you have (and are) nothing. It isn't something that starts off nor ends nicely, in a way. Neither of them are people. Neither of them are good.

(In general, I just love writing XemSai stuff where there is an undertone of ‘oh this will not end well, but they just can’t help themselves. They are all they've got.’)

Terra and Isa, meanwhile, have room to grow. After so long of being separated into parts of themselves they're people again, able to reflect on mistakes and learn, form bonds that are actually real. They have flaws and may slip up from time to time, may need to reassess who they are as people, but now it is something genuine and without a sense of dread and distrust hanging over them. They both share a lot of attributes and can see themselves in the other - and the bond they have can be one that is realistic, organic, and healthy. Not just healthy - but healing. They can lean on one another without fear, face aspects of themselves they were unsure about, look at internal self-issues knowing that there is someone nearby that gets it. Amongst all the pain and darkness and past cruelty and possession between them, there is more of a sense of innocence to it all - they're both picking up pieces of themselves and trying to find how it all fits together, working out how to go forward, figuring out how their hearts have brushed against each other in the past.

That, and its post 3 - after reconsiling, after moving on a little, after having others nearby. They have people around them that want the best for them. The situation has changed and so have they. All around, things have improved and now they can improve themselves. Together, hopefully.

I think moonrocks has a more sweet sentimentality and an aspect of continuous improvement and gentleness where XemSai's flavor is darker, richer, and laced with an undertone of regret. I've joked before that Moonrocks is just XemSai with extra steps but there is far more to it than that. Terra is such a wonderful character that has so much more to him than is on the surface, and the separation of Saix and Isa is something I really enjoy delving into.

I love both and am gonna be continuing to make content about both :)

lmao sorry for the essay. tl;dr - both very very good for similar but different reasons and my life revolves around them both hahahha

(Obligatory link to my written work where I channel these kind of vibes teehee :p)

[wandaromanova]

“And I... Am...” [2]

A Natasha Romanoff x Gn!Avenger!Reader story

warnings: fighting, little bit of violence, angst, death (let me know if i should add any!)

A/N: Ahhh, here’s the final part of this very brief series. i hope you all enjoy and if anyone would like me to write something else my asks are open. thank you for reading! <3

tagging: @username23345

summary: 5 years ago, the avengers lost. half the world may have been taken away, but Y/N’s entire world faded to nothing in their arms. they would do anything to bring everyone back, most especially the love of their life. whatever it takes.

Part 1

Word Count: 3.7K words

(gif is not mine)

5 years. 5 years without seeing her bright, pearly white smile. 5 years without her sarcastic comments and snarky remarks. 5 years without her messy red hair sprawled across her pillow as she sleeps peacefully beside you. 5 years without her warm hugs as her lavender scented perfume invades your senses. 5 years without long nights of cuddling in each other’s arms as you watched the cheesy romcoms of your choice. 5 years without waking up to her playfully kissing your face. 5 years without her standing by your side during missions. 5 years without your little dinner dates that you both decided to go on whenever you both had the time. 5 years without her teasing kisses against your neck that made you laugh as hard as ever before. 5 long, long years without Natasha Romanoff.

Everyday without her was agonizingly slow. Every part of your shared apartment a constant reminder of your failure. Your failure to protect the world, the failure of protecting your world. Natasha always ensured your safety and protection when you needed her most, and the time she needed you; you astronomically failed her. Your heart ached every night as you fell asleep, even more so in the mornings. The mornings were the worst as you would reach over to her side of the bed, expecting to feel her peaceful form breathing steadily next to you, but you are only met with the cold white sheets of your once shared bed. The cold sheets a heartbreaking contrast to her warm body.

You didn’t get a single night of uninterrupted rest, as the memory of Natasha fading to nothing in your arms would replay over and over like a song stuck in your head. You cried the first time you returned home on that fateful day. The walls of your apartment holding the memories of happier times, when she was still alive. Her coffee cup that she never washed and left on the counter every morning still sitting where she left it that very day. You didn’t have the heart to move it. You didn’t dare to move any of her things, leaving them where she had placed them. You wore all of her hoodies though, as they still held her scent. However, you went through all of her hoodies quickly, her scent fading away just like she had. You considered not staying in the apartment, the memory of her making it hard to breathe within the confines of your shared space. But, you didn’t have the heart to leave it either. Leaving your home felt like leaving her, although your true home was her.

You tried to hold out hope though. Every single day you would go to the Avengers Compound and oversee any occurrences. You would communicate with any avengers that were not in New York or simply not on earth such as Captain Marvel, Rocket, Rhodes, and Okoye. You got consumed by your need to compensate for the failure that changed your life and absolutely wrecked your self-esteem. Although you were stuck in the past, some of the other avengers tried to move past it. Tony and Pepper brought a beautiful daughter named Morgan into the world, you were so happy for them, albeit a bit envious. Steve joined a support group, Clint was.... somewhere doing lord knows what. But you remained in the compound, constantly ignoring your own well-being, unable to stomach the failure and desperately trying to find something to hold out hope. However, your stubbornness was not for naught, as one day, while Steve visited you at the Compound, Scott Lang appeared at the front of the Compound. As he explained about Quantum Physics and the possibility of time travel, hope made its way back to you full force. You could all quite possibly make things right again. This spark of hope didn’t ignite within you only, but it also coursed through the remaining avengers when they were informed of the insane, but good idea of time travel.

——————————————————————————

Time travel. That’s our only hope of restoring what used to be. It sounds absolutely insane, but it’s the only option we have. Just the fact that there even is an option, is a miracle. Tony took a little bit of time to be on board with the idea, but he came around and now all the avengers stand together on the platform. Clint and Rhodey were set to go to Vormir. You, Tony, Banner, and Steve were to go to New York. Nebula went to Morag, Thor and Rocket went to Asgard while Scott stayed behind. What felt like hours for the team, was only a minute in real time. As you all made it back to the present, you looked around at the entire team. “Did we get them all?” You turn to your right and look at Banner. “You mean to tell me this actually worked?” You asked with a wide smile. Suddenly, a thud is heard to your left.

The entire team looks at Rhodes, he is soaked and it is then you notice Clint’s absence. “Rhodey? Where’s Clint?” You ask nervously. Rhodes just looks up at the team with sorrow evident in his eyes. The whole room knew what that meant as it fell silent, you dropped to your knees. You were as close to Clint as Nat was, given he was your girlfriend’s best friend. Your soul was absolutely crushed by the news, and the fact that someone would have to tell his family about his sacrifice to bring everyone back was heart crushing. However, Clint’s death only fueled the motivation to get this over with once and for all. No one had time to truly mourn as now that the team retrieved the stones, the stones just needed to be placed into the gauntlet.

However, this was not the hardest part, no. The hardest part was figuring out who should actually snap their fingers. Thor, Tony, and yourself offered to do the snap, but Banner immediately intervened. “It’s gotta be me. You saw what those stones did to Thanos. It almost killed him. None of you could survive.” He said solemnly. “How do we know you will?” You asked him seriously. “We don’t, but the radiation is mostly gamma. It’s like, I was made for this.” He finished off, and everyone in the room begrudgingly agreed. Unfortunately, before Banner could even put his hands on the gauntlet, the compound was attacked by a huge explosion, sending everyone flying in different directions, some knocked out by the impact and buried beneath rubble.

——————————————————————————

You wake up with a groan, you entire body is aching. You slowly open your eyes and take in your surrounds. You are buried beneath the concrete of the compound. The once magnificent architectural building, now a destroyed foundation. You look to your right and notice that water is flooding into the area where you, Rhodes, and Rocket are trapped. You noticed that Rocket and Rhodes are both trapped under a piece of cement and you use your powers to lift it off of them before dropping it back onto the ground with a grunt.

You speak into comms, “Is anyone there? We’re trapped and are unable to get out of here. I can hold off the water, but I can’t get us back to the surface.” Your powers are strong, but it will take a great deal of energy to get yourself, Rhodes, and Rocket out of here. You have no clue how deep you guys are below the surface. But you could at least hold off the water until someone is able to save you all. Scott replies and says “I’m on my way, I’ll get you guys.” And you mumble a “thanks” before asking another question, “How on earth did this happen?” you ask this as you use your powers to form some sort of blockade to keep the water from drowning you all. Scott suddenly appears, going back to his regular size and says “Nebula was compromised. You guys better hang onto something,” as he turns into a giant and breaks you all out of the concrete cage you were held in.

As you all return to the surface, Scott places the three of you on the ground. You take notice of the state of Steve, Tony, and Thor. They are badly beaten as Thanos cowers over them. Your eyes widen as you notice the ships approaching behind Thanos, along with his army of thousands. You, Rocket, Rhodey, (and Gamora??) together, ready to attack. You have no time to question Gamora’s sudden seeming resurrection as you notice Banner is the only one missing from the bunch, nowhere to be seen. You turn to everyone as you point at the gauntlet in Gamora’s arms and speak “Protect that gauntlet at all costs, don’t let him get to it. As soon as Banner is spotted, give it to him so he can do the snap and end this, once and for all. Understand?” Everyone nods in acknowledgement at your words.

A sense of deja vu hits you as you turn to face the impending battle. Once again you all are drastically outnumbered, you all must stand and fight against Thanos once more. The only differences being that you all are 5 years older, half of the universe’s population is gone, and Natasha is not by your side. The entire team is angered that this happened in the first place and the desire and will to defeat the mad titan is as strong as its ever been. You all failed to protect the world and your loved ones once, you all refused to lose this battle again. You all have something to fight for. You all attack and after what felt like hours of fighting Thanos’ army, you notice Scott running with the gauntlet, and your eyes widen as Thanos makes his way towards Scott. You quickly throw the enemies you were dealing with, with the flick of your hand and rush for the titan head-on.

Using your vibrant blue powers, you strike Thanos with a powerful beam of energy. Thanos tries to block himself but is a little too late as he’s sent flying back. “You took everything from me.” You say angrily and with a vengeful conviction as your eyes turn blue and your blue powers waver across your hands, levitating you a few feet off the ground. The titan stares at you as he stands and says “I don’t even know who you are.” You look at him and tilt your head, and reply with a dangerous calmness, “You will.” You then end up encasing Thanos, holding him up high in the air, your powers acting as blue hands. You squeeze him with all the strength you can conjure up and start to rip off his armor without laying a finger on him. “Rain fire!” The titan exclaimed to his servant. “But sire, our troops.” “Just do it!” Thanos screams. Unfortunately, you were so caught up in your rage that you failed to notice what Thanos was saying. You were soon knocked out with a powerful blast from a ship above you. Your grip on Thanos no more as you flew across the field and were knocked unconscious.

——————————————————————————

You wake up and groggily try to take in your surroundings. Your entire team beat to the ground. Banner, Scott, and Clint are unconscious, and the rest of the team are too weakened to move. Captain Marvel was also here, when she got here? You have no idea, but that doesn’t matter as she was knocked out as well. However, at least the giant ships and Thanos’ army had been taken out. You guys did impressively well considering how outnumbered you all were. You look away from your battered teammates beside you and you feel panic wash over you. Above you, the massive titan stands, placing the gauntlet on his hand. No. He CANNOT get that gauntlet, you think in a panic. However, your body is too weak to get up, you still try to stand with every ounce of strength that’s left in your body, but to no avail. All of a sudden, you feel a tingling sensation from your hands that you have never felt before.

You look at your hands and notice little sparks of electricity forming. This has never ever happened before, your powers are a dark blue and are more like laser beams than sparks. What is happening? As you stared at your hands, you failed to notice Mjölnir rising beside Thor. Mjölnir abruptly launches itself into your hand, and you suddenly feel a surge of electricity flow through your veins, giving you a spark of energy. The people who are still conscious are shell-shocked as they had all tried and failed to wield the mighty hammer. You yourself had even failed to lift Mjölnir all those years ago before the Ultron situation, but now here you were, worthy and determined to win this battle. As you attempt to stand once more, Thor joyfully exclaims “I knew it!” At Thor’s words, Thanos stomps on Thor, successfully knocking the Asgardian God out cold.

You rise to your feet, the only thing on your mind being that you need to bring Natasha back. You charge at Thanos, rising off the ground as your dark blue powers mixed with the lightning of mjölnir radiate off of you. You struck the titan with a powerful, concentrated hit with Mjölnir before using up the most power you ever have. You manage to do damage to Thanos, but with the gauntlet on he manages to use the stones to fight against your own powers. As he hits you, he fails to notice you exchange the gauntlet with the stones, with another gauntlet that he failed to notice lying on the ground. As your body is flung like a ragdoll across the floor, you look up as Thanos says “I... am inevitable.” And he snaps his fingers, but nothing happens. He, along with everyone else looks confused as he does this. All of them were puzzled, except for you.

You get on your knees and place the real gauntlet on. The energy so powerful as it courses through your veins, it’s an intense burn as if your blood was made of fire, pumping through every part of your body. You look around at the team, the people you have grown to love and call a family. You know that this will be the end of you, but you are content with that. What better way to go than saving the world and bringing the love of your life back? The team seems aware of your fate as well, the sadness evident on the faces of the broken down avengers. It hurt them, but they knew it had to be done. They couldn’t stop you, even if they tried. You already had the gauntlet on and you had made up your mind. After one last glance at your family, you focus back on Thanos, who stares at you in shock. A human wielding the stones, that was a sight for sore eyes. The snap almost killed Thanos the first time, imagine now? You have powers of your own, yes, but you’re still a human. You take a deep breath, your mind is racing as it is taken over by thoughts of Natasha. How you’ll never get to see her red hair and green eyes sparkle again, how you’ll never hear her raspy laugh that warms you up inside, and how you’ll never have the future you both had always wanted together. But you remind yourself that this is all for her, and that was the final push you needed to follow through with this plan.

You stare Thanos dead in the eye again as you shakily say “I... Am...” you envision Natasha and her big bright smile as you finally say “an Avenger.” And with the snap of your fingers, a bright light consumes your body and radiates across the field. All you hear is the ringing in your ears and all you can focus on is the burning of your charred body. The conscious team members gather around you, they are all speaking to you but you can’t fully hear what they’re saying. They sound far away even though they’re right in front of you. You watch as Thanos and his little servants disappear into dust, just like half of the population did 5 years ago. You release a heavy sigh of relief at the sight.

You look back to Steve who’s directly in front of you. He reaches into his pocket and dials a number, and when he turns the phone towards you, you notice the contact name; Natasha. Steve’s eyes widen as the redhead actually answers her phone, it worked. He however, tried to swallow his shock as he let’s her know that you’ll be put on the line. He doesn’t have the heart to inform her of your condition. You use every muscle in your body just to reach out for the phone and grasp it in your hand. “Hello? Y/N, baby?? Where are you?? What happened??” You smile widely at the sound of her deep, raspy voice as your eyes slowly start to close. The team panics as they try to convince you to keep your eyes open just a little longer, Natasha’s voice sounding more concerned and alarmed at the coaxing of the team. We did it, we really did it... she’s okay... it’s okay... is your final thought as your eyes close even further. The darkness is so tempting and you find yourself falling deeper and deeper into it, until you’re consumed by it. Never to see the light again.

——————————————————————————

2 weeks later

At your funeral, Nat was suspiciously devoid of emotion as the ceremony commenced. It was so weird for the team to see and they were genuinely worried. Natasha was always sure to not make her emotions known, it’s how she was trained as an assassin, but to show no emotion after losing the love of her life? Definite cause for concern. After the beautiful ceremony and burial, the team all returned to Tony’s cabin, he let the team know that there was something he needed to share with them. Tony stands before the team in his living room and places his iron man helmet on the mantle. He clears his throat before he begins, “Before the time heist, Y/N approached me and asked me a favor. They borrowed my iron man helmet and asked me to play this recording if things went south. So, this is me fulfilling their final wish.”

You appear as a hologram, sitting on a chair in your time heist suit. “So, if you’re watching this.. that means that I’m... yanno” and you make a throat slicing motion with a little laugh. You then realize that the people watching this will most likely not find humor in your little joke and immediately stop laughing. “I hope that in watching this, that means that we succeeded in bringing everyone back. It’s all we have been hoping and praying for, for the past 5 years. And I pray to God... or to Thor... that it worked out.” You actually laugh at your terrible attempt at a joke. Everyone in the room laughs at your corniness with tears in their eyes.

“If we did win, that must mean that you’re here Natasha.” You pause and take a deep breath. At the mention of the redhead, the room falls silent as Nat watches intensely, desperate to hear what you have to say to her. You proceed, your voice wavering as you were overcome with emotion, “I’m so sorry that I had to leave you so soon. I’m so sorry that we’ll never have the chance to get married and have little rascals of our own running around a little farmhouse of our own in the middle of nowhere like we always dreamt of. But, the day you left me, those 5 long years ago, a part of me left with you. And I would do anything to get you back, and I’m sure I’ve proven that to be true if you’re seeing this.” You take another break as your voice starts cracking, as Natasha finally let a tear escape.

You suddenly stand up, and move over to the camera, staring directly into it with an intense gaze. “But Nat, baby, you have to listen to me when i say that this is not the end of the world. It may feel like it, but I promise you it’s not. Those 5 years without you, I felt as though I was drowning in grief and despair, but then hope made its way into my life when Scott suddenly appeared on the steps of the compound. And I promise you that you will have hope again, not for my return, but for happiness in your life again, without me.” At your words, Natasha shakes her head furiously as silent tears steadily fall across her pale cheeks.

You giggle “I know you won’t believe me right now, but you will one day my love. You were wrong that day in Wakanda. You WILL survive this. You must move on eventually, as impossible as it sounds and as much as it kills me to say. Please do not give up on the world, don’t push everyone away, but let them in. I gave my life up so you could live yours, and I know you wouldn’t let my life go to waste.” You stop and look down at your watch. “I have to go now, if this time heist thing goes to plan, then everyone who vanished will return. God, I hope so.... I love you Natalia Alianovna Romanova.” You look down at your hands, and back up at the camera and say your final words.

“Remember...” you begin while moving closer to the helmet, “You could never lose me moya lyubov... I’m yours forever.” You smile tearily and the recording ends. Those last words were what finally did it for Natasha. All the emotion she was keeping bottled up broke loose and she had no control of the wheel of her emotions as she slammed head first into a breakdown. Natasha cried in sorrow as she mourned the possibilities that are no longer possible and screamed out in anguish for the unfulfilled promises of a happy, long life with you by her side.

The world had won, but Natasha had lost her world.

[drmmyrs]

Remember Me (Becca x MC)

So, weird story. I was randomly browsing tumblr one time when this ask pops out at the top of the screen (req about amnesia au Becca’s POV). It wasn’t even related to anything I was reading but checked my inbox and it wasn’t there. Most probably the ask isn’t for me but still wrote it just in case 😅

PS if someone DID send me this ask, kindly drop me a message just so I know I’m not seeing things 😭

PPS I’m trying out a new writing style and I’m not sure if it’s any good so I’d really appreciate any feedback 🥺 (this will be a mini series too, I think, since the angst potential is definitely there 😂)

PPPS title is inspired from the song in Coco just cause I’ve been playing it a lot on piano recently

tag list: @whackawriting @samanthadalton @crazzyplays @uselesslesbianfr @baexpoppy @alexroyard @alexlabhont @veenast @noixngn @sillyandcutewizardstuffs (If you wanna be added or removed or just prefer a certain ship just let me know ❤️)

Pairing: Becca x MC (Emily)

Word Count: 2090

I don't remember what happened, nor know where I am, but I hear shouting, lots of it. I try to move, but my body feels completely numb; the only thing I can feel is the trickle of liquid that splatters across my face. Rain? I open my eyes strenuously, but all I can see past my blurry vision are brown eyes glistening with tears. I can't quite make out her face, but for some reason, seeing her cry sends a flurry of emotions that hurt more than my throbbing head. I try to open my mouth, hoping to provide comfort somehow, but no words come out. She is saying something over and over again, something about leaving? But my head hurts too much to be able to comprehend. A siren then blares from a distance, growing louder by the second as flashes of red cloud my vision. And that is when everything turns black.

I slowly open my eyes–still reeling from the nightmare that somehow felt too real–and harsh, blinding lights immediately greet me. I hastily shut my eyes back and suddenly become well aware of the ache engulfing my entire body. It isn't before long that I realize that someone is holding my hand, tracing lazy circles against my skin ever so often. I try to move it but only manage to lift a finger, and at once, the grip tightens and becomes still for a moment before I hear a voice– How can a voice sound so familiar... yet so strange? It's saying my name, urgent and gentle at the same time as though I might break at any second. I try to open my eyes, but exhaustion grips me powerless. And soon, I succumb to its fiery grasp as I slip back into slumber.

When I wake up again, I already feel much stronger than before. The ache in my body has turned into a dull hum as if sharp nails are gently caressing my skin, enough to be felt but not to hurt. I look around the room, panic swelling in my chest as I take in the sight of different medical equipment looming around my bed and needles sticking out of my arm. I fight the urge to squirm as I take big, calming breaths, ignoring how the four white walls seem to close in on me. Thankfully, the door opens, and a nurse walks in, temporarily distracting me from my distress. She smiles upon seeing me awake and walks towards me.

"Welcome back, Ms. Davenport. How are you feeling?"

"W–where am I?" I ask weakly.

"In the hospital. A month ago, you were involved in a car crash, and your head was hurt pretty badly," the nurse says sympathetically. She is now taking my vitals, scribbling something on her chart from time to time.

Car crash?

I scrunch my eyes, trying to remember, but the harder I try, the more my head hurts.

"Wait. A month? Are you saying that I've been here... for a month?"

The nurse nods. "You've been unconscious the entire time. But your vitals now are looking good. The doctor will just run a few tests to make sure we don't miss anything."

I stay quiet for a while, my mind still processing everything the nurse just said, which has only raised new questions.

"Your friends and family were really worried about you, you know. There wasn't a day when you didn't have any visitors. Especially that special friend of yours you were in the car with." The nurse turns towards me, holding a pen against her chin. "What was her name? Em–Emma, I think? She barely left your side. She actually just went to grab some food before you woke up."

...I don't know any Emma, but I don't tell her that.

"What about my parents?"

"Your mom and sister usually visit during the evening."

"And my father?"

The nurse shakes her head. "I don't think I've ever seen your father."

The nurse leaves after a while, and the doctor comes inside the room shortly. I answer a few questions before I'm escorted outside to take some tests. Afterward, the nurse leads me back to my room and gently guides me to bed.

"Would you like me to call in your visitors?" the nurse asks.

I nod.

The nurse goes out, and soon my mom walks in followed by–

"Emily." I frown. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Both of them stop in their tracks. My mom looks at me in concern and confusion, while Emily looks like I just punched her in the gut.

Anger bubbles up inside me as a realization comes to mind. "Y–you. You're the one who did this, aren't you? You're the reason I'm here."

A guilty look flickers across her face, confirming my suspicions. And before I can stop myself, I shout at her to leave, but she stands there motionless, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

"Go get the doctor," my mom tells her, which snaps her out of her shock. She scurries out of the room at the same time my mom starts walking towards me.

"Why is she here, Mom?"

My mom stops at the side of the bed and reaches out to stroke my hair. "Honey, the accident was not her fault."

"But she was there with me..."

"Yes."

"Why?"

My mom's hand goes still, resting on top of my head. "Becca, what was the last thing you remember?"

"I..." I close my eyes and think hard for a moment. "I–I remember hosting the Kappa party. But that doesn't make any sense. Why would I leave with Emily?"

A brief look of panic flashes across her eyes.

"Mom? What's wrong?"

My mom smiles at me, but it looks forced. "It's nothing, sweetie. The doctor will be here soon."

But I can see that she's trying her best to keep calm–the look on her face similar to when she would talk to my little sister and me right after we would hear her and dad fight.

The doctor comes in a little while later, asking a bunch of questions similar to my mom's. They then do more tests on me, and I grow scared by the minute, not understanding what the hell is going on. Eventually, I'm back in my room alone, my mom and the doctor staying outside to talk. After some time, they enter the room, and my mom sits beside me, taking my hand as the doctor walks towards the other side of the bed.

I look at my mom, drained from all the medical tests I went through the entire day. "What's happening, Mom? I'm scared."

My mom squeezes my hand and gives me a reassuring smile. "The doctor will explain it to you, sweetie. But I'll be right here the whole time." She then gives a single nod to the doctor.

The doctor smiles at me politely. "How are you feeling, Becca?"

I stare at him, suddenly annoyed at being asked the same question over and over again.

"Right then." The doctor clears his throat. "During the accident, your brain was affected more than we initially thought." He pauses, and I meet his gaze, willing him to go straight to the point. "It seems like you have retrograde amnesia, meaning that you have no memory of the past three years of your life."

The doctor goes on and on about the technicalities, but I'm not listening anymore. His voice is reduced to background noise as I repeat his words inside my head, trying to grasp the implications of what he just said. I prop myself up, looking wildly around the room, tugging at my shirt as if it would help me breathe. But it doesn't. My body feels numb, which is why I almost don't notice my mom pulling me into a tight hug, stroking my back comfortingly as she whispers reassurances. I focus on her voice, forcing myself to take deep breaths as I slowly begin to calm down. I pull away after some time, recomposing myself as I find my voice.

"Three years," I whisper.

"We'll help you recover your memories, honey. But for now, you can ask me anything you like."

"I–I think I just need some rest."

My mom nods, helping me settle back in bed before she leaves, promising to be back tomorrow.

Sleep comes easy to me, and I wake up the next day with Madison sitting at the chair next to my bed, browsing her phone.

"Hey, Maddie."

She looks up from her phone, a smile lighting up her face before she practically jumps out of her chair to hug me. "Becca!"

"Ow, that... kinda hurts."

When she pulls away from me, her eyes are teary.

"Sorry, I just missed you so much. You were gone for so long! I thought–"

"Hey, hey, none of that," I say, smiling at her.

She pulls the chair closer to my bed and sits down. "How are you, Becca? Your mom told me about your... condition."

I stare at the ceiling. "Yeah, it sucks." I snap my head back to her. "Tell me something. Do we still hang out a lot?"

"We still meet up from time to time. Not as much as we used to, though," Madison says, smiling sadly.

I nod. "Who do I usually hang out with now?"

"Emily."

I furrow my eyebrows. "Did we become close friends or something?"

"Oh, right. You've only been together for like two years," Madison murmurs contemplatively. "She's your girlfriend, Becca."

I let the information sink in. "You have got to be kidding me." I stare at her wide-eyed. "How–What–Why?"

Madison recounts our 'love story,' each detail more absurd than the last. I don't want to believe any of it, but Emily as my girlfriend... it actually explains everything. I rub my temples. How the hell did that happen? I remember like it was yesterday when she tried to steal Chris away from me. And now... and now...

"Maddie? Can you do me a favor and grab me something to eat? I'm starving."

Madison smiles. "Of course."

Madison goes out in a while, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

***

After a few more days of recovery, I am finally allowed to leave the hospital. Despite my protests, my mom explains that I will have to stay with Emily and her friends at what I assume has been my home for the past two years. She explains that she prefers for someone to look after me constantly, and she will not be able to do that with her job and all.

Outside the hospital, I find Emily waiting near a car; her eyes are bloodshot, as if she hasn't slept a wink in days. When she sees me approaching, her face immediately brightens up. Our gazes lock briefly before I turn back to my mom.

"Are you sure I can't stay with you?"

My mom smiles sadly. "I'm sorry, honey. I wish you could, but..."

"It's okay, I understand."

"Look, I know you don't remember, but these people you've been living with... they care about you very much.”

I nod.

My mom pulls me into a hug before guiding me inside the car, shutting the door afterward. She and Emily talk for a brief moment outside, and I watch as she hugs Emily before walking away. Emily steps into the passenger seat.

Zack, who is sitting in the driver's seat, turns around and smiles at me warmly. "I'm glad you're back."

I shift uncomfortably, ignoring his gaze. "Thanks."

We drive home silently, awkwardness saturating the car space. Upon arriving, I observe the details of the house, seeing if it sparks any memories... but nothing. I see Emily looking at me intently, probably thinking the same thing. They then lead me inside the house, and I step in hesitantly, taking in the surroundings, which vary immensely from the sorority house, the last place I lived based on my memories. Emily guides me to my room, lingering near me as I open the door.

"Becca–"

I turn towards her. "Please don't. I know you think I'm your girlfriend. A–and I guess I was. But as far as I remember, I don't like you at all. So I would appreciate it if you just leave me alone." I turn around and go inside my room, shutting the door behind me. I then lie on the bed, trying to forget how the light dimmed out of Emily's eyes as I broke her heart.

[dweetwise]

some fluffy adamkate for @neilusgrey because this ship is adorable <3 i used some prompts from this post while writing. it fit them too well!

word count: 3320

Adam X Kate: Turn your face to the sun

“So? What do you think?” Kate asked.

Adam looked around their surroundings. They were attending a folk concert held in Kate’s hometown, and even though it wasn’t Adam’s usual scene, he’d been quick to accept when Kate had invited him.

The sun was shining bright in the sky and nearly everyone was smiling, the sound of music getting louder but nowhere near unbearable as they approached the small stage in the middle of the park. There weren’t as many people as Adam had feared, only a small crowd forming in front of the stage.

“It looks nice,” Adam said. “I’m glad you asked me to come.”

“Of course!” Kate said. “It’s about time we—”

“Kate! Over here!” someone shouted from behind them, effectively interrupting their conversation.

Adam watched as Kate turned around to face a group of people, her face cracking into a brilliant smile once she seemed to recognize them.

“Hey, y’all!” Kate beamed, hugging one of the women. “Long time, no see.”

It was strange to see Kate so in her element. Just walking across the park and to the event area, they’d been stopped several times as people wanted to catch up with Kate and a few even asked for her autograph.

“It’s so good to see you! Where have you been?” one of Kate’s current admirers asked.

“Oh, I did a bit of soul-searching,” Kate explained. “Kinda needed to drop off the grid for a while.”

Adam could tell Kate was struggling with the lie. It had been a couple months since their escape from the Entity and they were only just now getting used to the normalcy of the real world. Standing here, being alive and well and surrounded by happy people with the sun shining down on them was almost too good to be true.

“This is my date, Adam!” Kate introduced him.

But the best thing about the situation was that Adam was here with the most incredible woman he’d ever had the pleasure of knowing.

“Nice to meet you,” Adam said, giving a polite nod to the group.

“Likewise!” one of Kate’s friends said. “We’ll leave you to it, but let’s catch up sometime, okay?”

“That sounds lovely!” Kate agreed, before turning to Adam. “Come on, let’s find a good spot!”

Adam followed Kate closer to the stage, almost transfixed on the way her long dress swayed in the gentle breeze. With her flowy sundress and the daisies in her hair, Kate looked like a personification of summer, and Adam was honored to be allowed to bask in her warmth.

It also reminded Adam how overdressed he was for the occasion. He’d chosen to wear a suffocating button-up and stiff chinos that already felt too warm for the weather. Hopefully he’d manage a few hours in the Pennsylvanian summer.

“You wanna stay farther away from the stage?” Kate asked.

“Yes, please,” Adam said with a grateful smile.

Kate knew how much of an introvert he was and she had never appeared to see it as a big deal. The concert was already out of Adam’s comfort zone, so getting some relative privacy would be very welcome.

They found a spot away from the commotion but with a relatively unobstructed view of the stage and Adam pulled out the picnic blanket he’d packed earlier and spread it over the soft grass. All the while Kate kept looking at him in intrigue, making Adam wonder whether he’d done something wrong.

“Is something wrong?” he asked.

“You have a really good smile, you know that?” Kate said, making Adam realize he’d been smiling the entire time.

“Oh. Thank you,” Adam said, scratching at his neck self-consciously. “I guess I don’t tend to smile that much. Especially after…”

He didn’t need to explain further. Kate nodded in understanding, knowing they all had their own demons to battle after their capture and subsequent escape from the creature that still haunted their nightmares.

“Let’s make some better memories together,” Kate said with an adorable, soft smile.

Adam felt his face heat up and he merely offered a stiff “yes” as they started unpacking their bags.

They’d never officially decided what this was between them. For what felt like years, they’d been closer than friends but not quite lovers. None of the other survivors had batted an eye when Kate sought comfort in Adam’s arms by the campfire every time the trials became too much. There were jokes about them being a couple, sure, but to this day nothing had actually happened between them. Adam had never wanted to push and regardless, a world of violence and death wasn’t exactly the best setting for romance.

But now they were free and Kate had wasted no time in asking him on a date. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he was certain that it had to mean something.

“I brought snacks!” Kate's triumphant grin snapped Adam out of his thoughts.

Adam watched as she retrieved a small box of strawberries as well as a packet of cookies from her beach bag.

“I wanted to have a picnic but didn’t know what you liked, so…” Kate explained.

“That was very thoughtful of you,” Adam said. “I didn’t realize to bring anything…”

“And I didn’t expect you to!” Kate reassured. “Come on, have some!”

They sat down to enjoy the snacks together, catching up on the brief period of time they’d been apart. Adam had been busy with a pile of paperwork about his disappearance in Japan and Kate had temporarily moved in with her parents. It became clear that neither of them were certain what the future would bring.

“There’s so many opportunities!” Kate said. “We can do whatever we want. The freedom is amazing.”

“It is,” Adam agreed. “But also a little overwhelming.”

He had no idea what he would do or where he would even go. All he knew was that he wanted to be near Kate; she was his rock and no matter what happened, he was sure he’d be okay as long as they were together.

Of course, he couldn’t say that out loud. They weren’t a couple and it was a little too intense to place so much importance on their friendship.

“We’ll figure something out,” Kate said, and just her smile was almost enough to reassure Adam.

They sat together and finished the snacks while enjoying the music, until the crowd seemed to get even more invigorated as people got up to dance. Adam watched a small group form in front of the stage with people twirling, jumping and laughing as they danced to the upbeat music.

"Let's join them!" Kate suggested almost immediately.

Adam shouldn’t have been surprised. Kate’s love for music knew no bounds, and even now she was nearly shaking with the boundless energy she always seemed to possess.

"We can't just leave our things," Adam tried to reason. "You go on, I'll stay here."

"Aw, you can’t get rid of me that easily! I wanna dance with you!” Kate said. “Nobody's gonna take anything.”

"I'm not much of a dancer," Adam protested, abruptly feeling the nervousness start to kick in.

"You'll be fine, hun—I promise!" Kate smiled at him and extended her bracelet-clad hand. 

Before the fog had swallowed him all those years ago, Adam would have declined in a heartbeat. But he wanted to believe he had changed. During the last few years, he’d learned he was much more capable than he could have ever imagined—a little dancing surely wouldn’t kill him.

So he grabbed Kate’s hand and let himself be briefly pulled into her world of sunshine and spontaneity.

While they approached the stage, Adam tried his best to learn the choreography by observing people dancing. To his mortification, there didn’t seem to be choreography, all of the dancers seemingly able to effortlessly improvise a professional-looking routine.

By the time they reached their destination, Adam’s hand was sweating where it was holding Kate’s. She didn’t seem to care, only turning to him with a bright smile before settling closer to him in a dance position.

"Don't worry hun, just follow my lead!" Kate said.

Kate started leading him into a dance and Adam followed the best he could. He stared at her feet to try to get the hang of her movements, focusing too hard and completely ignoring the beat—

It was only a matter of time before his foot landed on Kate’s much smaller sandal-covered one.

"Sorry!" Adam apologized, embarrassed over his mistake. “Did I hurt you?”

"Don't worry so much," Kate said. "Look at me and just go with the flow."

Adam lifted his gaze to Kate's face and some of his tension melted away under her familiar smile.

Gradually, he got the hang of it. The song changed but the rhythm of Kate's movements stayed the same, and eventually Adam's clumsy steps got more confident and mirrored the spring in Kate's. He learned to read her ques, changing directions when she did and twirling her around when she wanted to. Kate laughed and giggled while they danced, the smile never leaving her face, like this is what she was made to do.

Adam realized she might not have gotten the chance to dance with anyone before this, not since their escape. Kate was never meant for the dull grey world of the Entity; she was meant for this, sun and music and dancing without a care in the world. And Adam was honored to be able to give it to her.

He lost count of how many songs they danced to. Previously, he might have been embarrassed of letting Kate lead, but any worries about arbitrary gender roles had disappeared during the years where their lives were nothing but survival.

Worrying about the past was the last thing on Adam’s mind as he followed his ray of sunshine into another dance. He was sweating something fierce but he didn't care, absently popping a few buttons on his shirt and rolling up the sleeves to try to cool down. Kate seemingly didn’t tire of dancing, but Adam spotted the redness on her cheeks and the more pronounced breaths she took as they picked up the pace and the exertion started to kick in.

At some point, people started forming a ring in some sort of group dance, and Kate didn’t hesitate to guide them to join in. The choreography was easy to understand this time, Adam effortlessly keeping up as everyone danced in a ring, before partnering up and switching every so often. Even though he stumbled a few times, Adam had always prided himself on being a fast learner.

When Kate twirled herself into being his partner for the finale, Adam found himself laughing. He was having fun.

"See? I knew you'd like it!" Kate said.

“Only you could convince me to do something like this,” Adam said.

Kate laughed with him, the sound radiant and inviting. She was beautiful and so full of light, turning heads even on the makeshift dance floor. He didn’t think he’d ever quite understand what she saw in a nerd like him.

Once the song ended, Kate let out a sigh.

"Whew, I'm beat!" she said.

Adam couldn't agree more. No matter how much he enjoyed the dancing, he was starting to get winded and his shirt was now drenched in sweat.

"Let's go drink some water," Adam suggested.

They returned to their spot and, to Adam's surprise, everything seemed to be exactly the way they left it. He'd completely forgotten about his worries while they danced.

Adam got out his water bottle from his backpack, when Kate's voice interrupted him.

"Aww, no!" Kate said, clearly disappointed when she peered into her bag.

"What's wrong?" Adam asked.

"I didn't close my bottle properly," Kate said, pulling out her wet, empty water bottle. "It's leaked all over."

She showed her bag that contained some now-soaked cookie crumbs and her keys bathing in water.

"I'm so sorry," Adam said. "We should hang it to dry somewhere—"

"It's not a big deal," Kate said with a smile. "It's just gonna smell like soggy cookies for a bit. That's what I get for being a klutz."

Adam's full water bottle felt heavy in his hands.

"Here, have some of mine," he said, extending the item.

"Are you sure?" Kate asked.

"Absolutely," Adam said. "We need to stay hydrated in this weather."

"You're the sweetest," Kate said and Adam felt his face heat up from the compliment.

Kate accepted the bottle, and only took one prim, small sip before holding it out for him.

"Come on, take a proper drink," Adam encouraged. "We’ll split it in half."

Kate gave him a sheepish smile, before tipping her head back and taking big gulps of the beverage, drinking nearly half of the bottle.

"Whew, that was refreshing," Kate said with a happy sigh. "Thanks, doll."

"My pleasure," Adam said.

He followed Kate's lead and emptied the bottle with similar gusto. The water felt heavenly in his dry throat and overheated body.

Afterwards, Adam insisted on setting up Kate's bag to dry in the sun.

"It should dry in no time," Adam said. "It's really hot today. I wish I was dressed for the weather."

"But you look so snazzy," Kate smiled. "Feels like I'm with royalty."

"I don't know about that. You look incredible today. I mean—err, you always do, but..." Adam floundered. "Your dress is beautiful."

"Thank you," Kate said with a shy smile, doing a little twirl. "It's good for dancing."

"I still can't believe you got me to dance," Adam said, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Admit it. You had fun back there!” Kate was positively beaming at him.

"I did," Adam admitted. "And I never would have tried it on my own. Thank you."

"Thank you for doing it for me," Kate said. “I know this ain’t your thing, and I didn’t wanna push too hard. But I knew you’d be great, and…”

Kate trailed off, and Adam followed her gaze to an ice cream booth at the foot of the hill.

"Do you want to get ice cream?" Adam asked.

"I was just about to ask!" Kate grinned.

They walked to the kiosk, only standing in a short line as most people were still busy dancing. Adam took some time to browse the list of available flavors while they waited.

"Do you know what you're getting?" Adam asked.

"Not yet—there's so many to choose from!" Kate said, almost as in awe.

Adam hummed in agreement and focused back on the list. He was a little disappointed to not find matcha flavor on the menu, as it was his favorite from his time in Japan. Most of the options looked sickly sweet, and Adam skimmed over the cookie and candy flavors until eventually settling onto pistachio.

He glanced over at Kate who was still staring at the menu. If Adam had to guess, she was choosing between some of the more strange flavors—maybe even thinking about mixing them into a daring combination.

"Okay, I'm done!" Kate said once it was their turn to order. "You go first."

"One pistachio, please," Adam said.

"And for the lady?" the vendor asked.

"Chocolate," Kate said.

Adam turned to look at Kate in surprise.

"I ain't that adventurous with food," Kate explained with a sheepish grin.

After Kate's usual spontaneity and boldness, it was incredibly endearing to find out that she was a picky eater. Adam was suddenly eager for an opportunity to introduce her to Japanese and Jamaican flavors in the future.

"You can't go wrong with the classics," Adam assured.

"Here you go," the vendor said, handing over their orders. "That’s $3 a piece."

Kate started fishing out her wallet, but Adam beat her to it.

"It's on me," Adam said, already paying for their orders. “I owe you for the snacks.”

"Well, ain't you a gentleman," Kate said with a mischievous smirk.

Rather than stay closer to the stage, they returned to their spot to enjoy their ice creams.

"How is it?" Adam asked.

"Love it!" Kate beamed. "Do you wanna try?"

Butterflies danced in Adam's gut when Kate extended the treat to him. He nodded and carefully took a bite out of the ice cream. The chocolate flavor was not as rich as he'd normally like, but the texture was creamy and it didn’t taste too sweet.

"It's really good," Adam said. "Do you want to try mine?"

Kate regarded his green ice cream skeptically.

"Sure!" she eventually decided.

Kate hesitantly tasted the ice cream with the very tip of her tongue, before her face twisted into a grimace and Adam found himself laughing.

"Not for you, huh?" he teased.

"No, sorry, it's…" Kate said. "It tastes weird. Why is it salty?"

"Different strokes, I suppose," Adam smiled, digging back into his strange-tasting dessert.

They ate in companionable silence, watching the music performance and the people dancing to it.

"Thanks for coming with me today," Kate broke the silence.

"Thank you for inviting me," Adam said. "It's not my usual type of event, so I hope I didn't make too much of a fool of myself."

"What are you talking about? If anything, you're too cool for a place like this," Kate said.

"That's definitely not true," Adam protested. "I am not ‘cool’ in the slightest."

"Yeah you are," Kate insisted with a smile. "You're always so calm and polite and know exactly what to do. It feels like I'm just a dumb country girl in the presence of a prince or something."

Adam couldn't believe his ears. All this time, he’d thought Kate was too good for him, and she’d felt the exact same way about him?

"You are anything but dumb, Kate," Adam said. "To be honest, your charisma and talent sometimes overwhelms me. I often wonder what you see in me."

Kate laughed; not a mocking one, but a laugh that told Adam he was being absurd.

"Guess we're both kinda dumb, then," Kate smiled.

Adam returned the smile, feeling immense relief. He now knew that—for some crazy reason—Kate was just as fond of him as he was of her. Neither of them broke eye contact, and for a while they merely looked into each other’s eyes while their ice creams slowly melted.

"Can I kiss you?" Adam found himself asking.

It was barely above a whisper, finally having the courage to ask the words he hadn’t been able to during all these years.

"Thought you'd never ask," Kate said just as softly.

They both leaned into the kiss, and feelings of affection for this woman bloomed in Adam's chest when their lips met. Kate's lips were chilly from the ice cream but there was an underlying warmth in them that spread through Adam's body, like he was basking in the glow of the sun.

Their lips moved slowly against each other’s, hesitant at first and then finding a shared rhythm; just like when they danced together earlier.

When they pulled away, Adam was breathless, but it wasn’t not from a lack of air; it was from everything that was Kate.

"Hmm," Kate said conversationally.

"Hmm?” Adam repeated.

"Guess I don't mind pistachio flavor when it's mixed with Adam flavor," Kate smirked.

Adam threw his head back and laughed, and Kate did too.

They finished their half-melted ice creams while listening to the last songs of the concert. They talked about anything and everything, Adam no longer feeling like he had to hold back or keep up appearances. He placed his hand on Kate's and Kate insisted on trying some more ice cream from his lips.

It was the best date of Adam's life and he couldn't wait to see what their future might bring, knowing that Kate would be right by his side.

[rainydaydream-gal18]

(Clone Wars/Rebels) Rebels!Rex x Reader: Hope

(Author’s Note: Sooo this is a neat request I got! I REALLY hope you don’t mind that I tweaked it a tad!!!!  And I hope you like it!!!!  Highkey this almost had me crying at the end, oh my.  It’s tough for me to write Rebels era Rex because in my mind he’s forever young ;^;  But I really did enjoy this request, and thank you!

OG Request: What about a Rebels Rex x reader reunion where the reader died during order 66, but became a ghost. So she sticks with Kanan and the ghost crew, when they get Rex back she stays invisible so that he can't see her because she thinks that he moved on. Something happens and he sees her, she hides and he has to hunt her down and convince her that they could make it work.)

   “_________,” Kanan said gently.  He stood at the doorway to your quarters, eyes full of concern.  “I know this is hard for you.  Believe me, I don’t like it any more than you do, but...you can’t hide forever.  The others are worried about you.”  You materialized in the middle of the room, eyes downcast and arms wrapped around your form in an attempt for comfort.  Kanan stepped inside the room, allowing the door to slide shut behind him.  “The clones took everything from us.  They betrayed the jedi and killed so many…” The bridge of his nose crinkled as the rest of his face twisted with pain at the memories.  Bitterness came off him in waves.

   “Kanan, you misunderstand,” you whispered, walking over to take a seat at the edge of your bunk.  “That’s not why I’m hesitant to reveal myself to the men who we’ve teamed up with.  The truth is...I don’t entirely blame them.”

   “What?” he asked in disbelief.  “How could you not?”  

   “Remember, Kanan, I was a jedi knight when Order 66 went through.  You only remember part of the story because you were so young.  The men were under Sidious’ control.  We can’t hold that against them.”

   He folded his arms, as if his point still stood.  “Then why are you hiding?”

   At that, your eyes returned to the floor.  “Because I know those men.  I knew Captain Rex quite well back in the day.”

   Kanan’s eyes widened.  “You mean…”

   “I know.  It was against my code and his regulations, but we were together.  I...I loved him.  I was off on another mission when Order 66 was given.  The troops I was working with fired at me, and that’s when the accident happened.”

   “The accident that left you a ghost.  But it wasn’t an accident, _________.  Your soldiers betrayed you and shot at the energy field behind you.  They-”

   You sighed.  “Kanan, I’m not a force ghost.”  When he gave you a skeptical look, you continued, “I can walk through walls and vanis, but think about it.  Have you ever seen a ghost stick around this long?  Or actually have the ability to materialize a physical form like I do?”

   “Can’t say I’ve had too many encounters with them in the first place,” he mumbled.

   “The accident turned my body into energy.  They didn’t take my life.”

   “__________.”  He closed his eyes and shook his head.  “That doesn’t excuse what they did, and I don’t blame you for not wanting to face them.”

   “Rex didn’t do this to me anyway.  He’s a good man, and I never stopped loving him.  I just don’t want him to see me this way.  He has probably been moved on for some time now, and he’s going to be upset.”

   “He should.”

   “Kanan!” you scolded.  “That’s enough.  I get that you’re still hurting.  I understand.  Really, I do.  I just don’t need to hear this right now.”

   He released a sigh, resting a hand on your shoulder.  “You’re right.  I’m sorry.”

    Just then, the door to your quarters slid open.  You vanished on instinct, but it appeared that you hadn’t gone quickly enough.  A familiar pair of eyes stared wide at the spot you had previously sat beside Kanan.  Though you recognized them instantly, they belonged to an aged face.

   “___________?  I knew it.  It is you.”

   Kanan glanced around awkwardly while you remained invisible.  “Um…”

   “I thought I saw ___________ earlier.  I thought that maybe it was just all in my head, but she’s here, isn’t she?”

   “Look, Rex…”

   “Please,” Rex pleaded.  “Please tell me where I can find her.  I never knew what happened to her after the Republic fell.  I know you don’t like me but-”

   “I’m right here,” you said, materializing.  Rex’s eyes widened and  mouth fell open.  “I didn’t want you to see me this way.”

   “___________, what happened to you?”

   The sympathy and in his voice caused you to feel a familiar ache in your chest.  It was overwhelming.  For years you had wondered, just as he did, what happened.  For years you tried to come to terms with never seeing him again.  But there he was standing in front of you.  In fact, he was walking over.

   “Wait,” you said quickly.  “I...I can’t.”  You vanished again, this time hearing him call out,

   “No!”  You hurried past him and ran straight through the closed door.  You heard him on the other side.  “I’m going to find her.”

   - - - - - - - - - - - - -  

   “___________,” you heard Rex’s voice pant.  “There you are.”

   “Rex, I’m sorry about earlier.”

   “Don’t worry about it.”  A strained groan escaped his lips as he lowered himself to sit beside you.  “I just don’t want to lose you again.”

   You hugged your knees to your chest as you gazed out at the setting sun from the roof of the ship.  The sky glowed a variety of lovely colors; orange, pink, and even a little purple.  For the first time since seeing Rex again, you felt at peace.  Sitting beside him felt normal even after all that time.  “What do you mean?”

   “After Order 66 was given, I had quite the adventure.  Ahsoka helped me get the chip out of my head so that I would no longer carry out the order.”  He sighed.  “I looked everywhere for you after that.  Even some of my brothers told me that the worst may have happened, but I always had hope.  I never stopped looking.  I never stopped- I never stopped loving you.”

   “Rex,” you whispered.  “What we had was great, but it was a long time ago.  So much has changed since then.  We were young, and we had no idea what the galaxy would become.”

   “What are you talking about?” He gave a hearty laugh.  “We’re still young, and there’s a new hope.”

   You looked over at him, meeting those eyes that held so much warmth in them.  Even with the crinkles around his eyes and the white beard, in your eyes he was the same Rex you knew back then.  Memories began to flash across your mind like a holovid playing in front of you.  Memories of stolen glances across the strategy meetings and debriefings, secret kisses when no one was looking, and many battles fought side-by-side.

   “What happened to the serious captain I knew?” you smiled.

   “He lightened up a bit.”  Rex chuckled.  You ventured to reach out a hand to rest its palm on his cheek, and he instinctively relaxed into the touch, closing his eyes and exhaling.  “__________, do you still love me?”

   “Of course I do.”

   “Then we can make this work.  Like I said, I don’t want to lose you again.  Ever.”  He reached up to gently place his hand over yours, opening his eyes to gaze at you with determination.  Your breath caught in your throat.

   “A-alright.”

   His eyes glinted then, the same way they used to when you’d look at him from across a briefing, and he leaned in to wrap his arm around your form and pull you against him.  He tipped your chin up and captured your lips in a kiss.  You giggled, and he pulled away.  “What?”

   “Nothing, it’s just,” you giggled again, tears spilling from your eyes.  “The beard.  It tickles.”

   “Oh yeah?” he laughed, leaning in to playfully swipe his beard across your cheek, sending you into a fit of giggles as you tried to break free from his embrace.  Then, he let you catch your breath.  “I missed you.”

   “I missed you too.”  You pressed a kiss to his hand.  “And you’re right.  There is hope.”

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About "Yesterday's Lie" from The Owl House

Salutations, random people on the internet who absolutely won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!

Here it is! The midseason finale of The Owl House Season Two! An episode featuring Luz going back to the human realm, is hyped up to heaven about how painful it'll be for the audience, and features more anxiety by how Creepy Luz is a thing. And BOOOOOOOOY howdy were fans not ready for this. I'm sure as hell not ready for when I wrote this intro at *checks time* thirty minutes before watching the official premier. Yup, the words you're reading right now are from me in the past, when everything was still pure and simple. Whereas future me is still probably destroyed by the events that transpired. Isn't that right, future me?

Future Me: Actually, it wasn’t that bad. The ending hurt, sure, but other than that, it wasn’t too painful.

Wow, that is some neat input! At least, I think it was. I wouldn't know because I literally wrote that after watching the episode. With the words you're currently reading being written at *checks time* twenty-six minutes before the premier...this whole intro is confusing, isn't it, future me?

Future Me: Sure is.

Yeah, it's definitely confusing. In any case, let's dive into this spoiler-filled review as we find out together just how painful this episode was! Take it away, future me!

Future Me: Will do! Major spoilers ahead, folks!

Now, let’s review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Luz’s Room: We only see it for a short time, but everything about it just screams Luz. The pile of weird-looking stuffed animals, the witch hat in the center of the floor, and the fact that she has bunk beds, a single child's dream (Or so I've heard). It's a small thing, but I love it.

Vee: Here she is! The character previously dubbed Creepy Luz who now turns out to be yet another new addition to the ever-growing list of characters that we, as a fandom, would give our lives for. Because holy s**t was Vee the best type of expectation subversion. Showing us all the ominous ways of how she basically took Luz's place made fans assume that Vee was an evil doppelganger. Turns out, she was just a tortured soul that was desperate to live a new and better life and lucked out in finding Luz's. What Vee does is...questionable at best, but seeing what she went through with the experiments Belos pulled on her, you understand why she would do it. And I personally love it's that same background information that makes Vee resentful of Luz of all people. Luz's life is a relative dream come true, and running away from that would be insane to someone who spent most of their existence through imprisonment and experimentation. It's an intriguing point of view, even though it's admittingly flawed given how it's mostly Camila that seemingly made Luz's life bearable. But the flaws don't matter. What matters is that you can see where Vee is coming from, and to me, personally, I think she's understandable enough to make me root for her to have some kind of happy ending. Whether as Luz or as herself, I'm hopeful to see Vee get some semblance of peace.

Camila: *Round of applause* Don't mind me! Just taking the time to love how all them sons of b**hes who thought Camila was a bad mom are now heavily invalidated. 'Cause, guess what? Camila is a fantastic mother, both to her daughter and her daughter's doppelganger! Allow me to walk you through the highlights:

How Camila looks like she’s not okay with the fact that "Luz" is clearing out her weird stuff, seemingly acting too different to the Luz she knows. Added to the fact that Camila doesn't like it.

How Camila drove Luz to camp whether than letting her take the bus

The fact that Camila takes that box of junk back in, not willing to part with the tin foil sculpture Luz made.

The way she was willing to play along with the game she thought Luz was doing, supporting her daughter's creative mind that Camila admits to being glad to see.

And, best of all, the willingness Camila had to help this poor creature, despite the lies it lived.

It's that last part I really want to touch upon, though. Because an action like that shows just how much Luz's heart comes from Camila. The kindness and generosity of helping this poor creature, who she has every right to run out on, proves how Luz learned to be everything she is today through Camila's own loving heart. Vee was scared and hurt, and the second Camila saw that she was then more than willing to help because of it. It's something that Luz would do, and it proves that even though Camila didn't exactly get everything right, she's still a great mom where it counts.

“A new life”: A perfect line.

Initially, it makes audiences think that it has everything to do with replacing Luz. It's only through future context that we know it's about escaping the s**t show Vee once lived through that it's clear she's talking about starting over. It hits us with intrigue on the first viewing, only to hit harder with the feels during a second. Really well-done.

Luz in the Mirror: A well-done surprise that makes fans curious about how this even happen in the first place. Kudos to you, writers.

The New Portal: I don't mind that they found a way to build this off-screen. Showing Luz and the gang slowly building a new portal would have been a little too tedious to watch, and it's so much better to just start this episode out with it. Besides, maybe we'll get the slow and steadier version now that we've seen how quickly building one might not have been the best way to go, given how fast that thing fell apart.

Luz Between Dimensions: I have no clue what the hell that place she was in is called, but it's awesome! The overall design of the realm is the correct type of unsettling, like it's oozing with mystery, but it's somewhere that you probably don't want to be in for too long. Whoever designed it deserves all of the credit because I don't want to even think about all the hard work that went into making this look as well-made as it was.

Luz Resisting to See Amity: What? Luz and Amity are adorable, and seeing Luz's immediate thought about seeing Amity makes my shipping heart scream with glee. Don't judge me!

Hiding Luz’s Dad’s Face: Well, that was a fun story while it lasted.

So, it turns out that Luz's dad really was a part of Luz's and Camila's life at some point, but not anymore. As for why remains to be seen, as we don't really know yet if we'll see him make an appearance. I'd say that the odds are high that he will, given how much of a point this episode made about keeping his face hidden. Shows don't usually do that unless the goal is to hype up some official reveal, and I can't wait to see what comes of it.

Luz Telling Herself to Count to Five: Hey, more evidence for how I relate to Luz! I know how it feels to be all panicky about a specific situation, and I only got better when I took the time to calm down for a bit. Sometimes, I even tried the "count to x" method that Luz used...it never worked, primarily because it made me feel worse when people told me to do it, but I still tried it! Plus, there's also some narrative foreshadowing when after Luz says five, the realm shows her Vee, or Number V, which is a pretty cool detail you'll notice on a rewatch.

Luz Helping Vee: I gave Camila praise for helping Vee in the end, but that doesn't abstain Luz from her own set of recognition. The second that Luz realized that Vee wasn't really a threat and is far from evil, our favorite human does what she can to help and even makes a deal where they're both happy. Because, of course, Luz is that perfect of a protagonist who is more than willing to help others in need. And it's why we love her so.

Looking for Magic that Eda Left Behind: A pretty cool idea that gives Luz and Vee a chance to bond and giving us an insight into Eda's past antics and misadventures in the human realm. Not much I can add to it, though.

Gravesfield: It's surprisingly not as jarring as I thought it would be to spend an episode in the human realm. I thought for sure, after all that time in the Boiling Isles, there would be something off about walking around a normal environment for a change. Turns out, it's almost easy to get used to. Or, for me, it is.

But I will say that there's this neat use of colors when comparing Gravesfield with the Boiling Isles. In Gravesfield, the coloring looks dulled down and standard, which is a stark contrast to the bright vibrancy of everything we've seen in the Boiling Isles. It's a subtle way of showing how things are different, aside from the major discrepancies we could come to expect. And I think that's why I appreciate it much more.

Eda’s Called Herself Marylynn in the Human Realm: Hang on...hang on...do you mean to tell me that the crack theory about Eda being Stan's ex-wife is actually true?

...

...What even is this show?!

Vee Making Friends with Camp Members: This shows the most apparent difference between Luz and Vee. Where we see Luz is already fearing the many ways that could go wrong with interacting with teens, Vee revealed that she adapted to her situation and had a chance to make friends. The implications of this are worth discussing another time, but for now, I'll say that it's pretty intriguing that we gain this much insight into both Luz and Vee through such a small thing.

Belos Wanting to Learn How Basilisks can Drain Magic: ...Didn't Raine say that Belos was taking away magic? If so, I think we can figure out how he's doing it. The question now is: Why?

Jacob (The Curator Guy): This guy was a riot. At first, Jacob seemed like a threat with the way he trapped Vee and was apparently stocking her, but the second he goes off about his conspiracy theories, it becomes clear what type of character he is. And was it a blast seeing how much of a crackpot this man is. It wasn't cool seeing him wanting to dissect the precious angel that is Vee, but I still chuckle about things like his "Flat Eather's Certificate." So while he's not that much of a threat, he's still fun to watch.

The Owl Beast was in the Human Realm: ...How did that happen? When did it happen? And how the hell did Eda get out of a situation like that?! Who knows, but it's still a shocking piece of news to learn.

Luz Telling Camila the Truth: Hey, she faced her fear after all! Although, the results aren't as pleasant as when Amity faced her fear two weeks ago.

Camila is a Veterinarian: ...One insignificant reveal...managed to destroy so many fanfics. I mean, we probably shouldn't have just assumed Camila was a nurse...but what the f**k else were we supposed to think?! Sorry for seeing the scrubs, and the first thing that came to my mind was "nurse" and not "vet."

By the way, that had to have been intentional, right? There's no way that Dana Terrace didn't think we'd assume Camila was a nurse. She'd had to have put off a reveal like that just to trip up her fans. And if that's the case, then that is a major d**k move...but that's why I mildly respect it.

Two Human Brothers went to the Demon Realm: Turns out we don't have to be in the Boiling Isles to learn more about it. Because now we have more information about how two humans were taken to the Isles with the help of a witch, thus setting up a grander reveal if it turns out that one of the humans was Philip and the witch was Belos. Because if that's true...then there's more of a history between those two than we thought.

Jacob has a Training Wand: This helps me believe that it's highly likely for Jacob to make a return and to have a power boost for when he does. After all, focussing all that attention on the training wand is way too convenient for it not to come up again in the future. Meaning we're most likely going to get more pain from Jacob if he shows up again.

Camila Beats the Crap out of Jacob for Vee: ...Writers, don't make me choose between Camila and Eda on who's the better cartoon mom. I know Eda's technically not a mom...BUT I STILL DON'T WANT TO CHOOSE DAMNIT!

Also, the sandal...just...

Why the f**k does Camila have a sandal in her purse? I don't know. Is it still funny that she does? Most certainly.

Camila and Luz’s Talk in the Rain: Ooooooooh, I was not ready for this...

I wasn't ready for the crying.

I wasn't ready for the hurt in Camila's eyes when she found out Luz chose to stay in the Boiling Isles.

I wasn't ready for Camila asking if Luz hates being with her that much.

I wasn't ready for Luz profusely stating how it was never Camila's fault.

I was not ready for Camila to tell Luz that she'll try to do better.

And I definitely was not ready for Luz to barely have enough time to promise that she'll come back.

This episode wasn't the twenty-two minutes of nonstop angst that I thought it was going to be...but this short scene more than make up for it.

Luz Tries to Stay Strong: Yet another thing she unwittingly learned from Camila. Camila tried to keep a brave face when Vee was with her and Luz, most likely not wanting to tear either of them down in the process. Luz does the same thing here as she avoids talking about the details of what went down in her sort-of journey back home. And seeing her clearly fake smile slowly droop into an uncertain frown, it uh...it definitely tore me up inside.

WHAT I DISLIKED

I want to say it's perfect, but there's one major issue that really bogs this episode down.

Continuity Error in How Vee Replaced Luz: Having Vee take Luz's place the same day Luz appeared in the Isles is a smart idea on paper...if it wasn't for the fact that it's impossible.

Because Eda closed the portal door the second that she saw Luz, meaning that there's no way for Vee to go to the human realm. It's a major plothole that makes no sense, and it might just be the first time ever that this series wasn't so closely knit with its story. Which ends up taking a dive in quality in the process.

IN CONCLUSION

I'd say that "Yesterday's Lie" is an A-. Everything about Luz, Vee, and Camila is incredible, combined into a story that ends in tragedy and uncertainty for the future. That plothole may drag things down a bit, but everything else is handled so well that I'm not lying when I say it's easy to forgive and forget.

(And that's ten episodes in a row without a single stinker. HOW THE F**K DOES THIS SEASON KEEP WINNING?!)

[fandom-blackhole]

Mando May 2021 Week 1 + Day 5

AN: This is the first of the Mando May prompts I will be writing for! I hope you all like this, and know that it was only minimally edited by my very tired brain and eyes, so if you see a mistake please let me know so I can fix it. Please like and REBLOG so that others can see this, and lastly I love you all :)

Prompts:

Week 1: Ke'jorhaa'i Mando'a - "Speak Mando'a"

Part of the Resol'nare (tenants defining a Mandalorian) instructs that mandalorians are to be taught or raised to speak Mando'a.

Cyare'se- loved ones

Pairing: Din Djarin x GN!Reader

Words: 1.8k

Summary: Reader walks into the cockpit to find Din teaching Grogu a language they don't recognize, but rings a bell somewhere in their mind.

Warnings?: absolutely none, just straight fluff and family cuteness! Established relationship and no use of y/n,

It had been a slow day in hyperspace. You had spent the majority of your waking hours cleaning up miscellaneous and strange stains in the belly of the Razor Crest that if you had to guess were a mixture of mainly blood or blaster residue, and fixing what wiring you could in hyperspace and what you could reach in the small spaces they were contained in, and with every stretch of your arms, you cursed Din for having such an awkward ship. You had not seen nor really heard from Din or Grogu since you had woken up and checked on them both in the cockpit making sure they had already eaten something and that they both had had something to drink and before you had left the cockpit you had made sure to lean down and give Din a quick kiss on the dome of his helmet and told him you would be doing some chores down in the hold of the ship if he needed you and with his answering nod and forehead bump you could tell that he was smiling softly, and his softly voiced affirmation reply only seemed to confirm that thought.

By this point, it had been more than a few hours at least and your arms were more than tired and sore from all the scrubbing and digging around you had been doing, so you decided that a short break to relax and recoup would be good for you. So you went and grabbed a couple of ration bars and a thing of water before heading to the cockpit, wanting to sit with your boys and figuring they might also appreciate a little snack or drink, and you just wanted to see what they had been up to while you had been busy down here.

Climbing the latter you finally heard Din’s soft voice saying something to whom you could only assume to his son, but it was so soft that you could not make out what it was he was saying. You just smiled, thinking about how happy you were that Din finally was opening up to both you and Grogu and allowing himself to speak more compared to how closed off and quiet he had been before. You knew that Din had been through so much and that he had to work through everything at his own pace, and you by no means were rushing him to show more of himself, but you remember there being days when you would just ramble and talk nonsense in hopes that he would even just speak up to tell you to stop talking, though he never did and you eventually started to think that he might actually like hearing your rambling. So now, hearing his voice so freely, yet still reserved, made you so extremely happy, and still managed to surprise you every so often, especially when he initiated conversations on his own.

It wasn’t until you pulled yourself up to sit on the edge of the latter opening in front of the doorway to the cockpit that you realized that even if you could make out what Din had been saying, you wouldn’t have had understood a second of it. The sight you were greeted with was Din, in his chair, turned to look at the secured cradle where Grogu sat eagerly soaking up his father’s attention and looking at Din with such love and adoration on his tiny face that it made your heart hurt from how much love you felt in that exact moment. You sat there and watched the two interact for a few minutes, just observing this pure father-son interaction. You listened as Din sounded out a word, again in a language that you did not quite recognize, but somehow felt familiar. You watched Din’s helmet as he nodded his head at the end of each syllable of the word, or words you weren’t quite sure if you were honest, and the whole time you searched through your memories and knowledge trying to place where the word or language came from and why it was ringing bells inside of your head. Then you were completely shocked out of your observation and attempts at recollecting by a small and higher-pitched voice, much louder than Din’s, responding in a very decent attempt at whatever Din was trying to teach, especially considering that the reply came from that small egg-shaped cradle and this was the first time you had heard Grogu try and mimic or communicate with anything past baby like chitters or babbles. And when Din praised Grogu you had to hold a hand over your chest, because your heart absolutely melted at how proud Din had sounded and how much more little Grogu’s face lit up with his ears perking up stiffly beside his tiny face showing his absolute joy.

It was then that you decided to make yourself known, and you softly spoke up saying, “That was so good Grogu! How come you never told me you two were doing language lessons….. And that language sounds so familiar but I don’t recognize it, what is it,” you ask as you slowly raise from the floor and walk over to the two boys. Din looked over at you as you approached them and as he replied you kissed the top of Grogu’s head and ran your fingers softly over his ears the way he likes.

“He is picking it up much better than I thought he would and at a fast rate. I started teaching him words here and there these last couple of months, it has only taken him a few days to learn and speak the words clearly….”

Picking up the little gremlin when he noticed and tried to steal one of the ration bars, you sat in the only open seat left in the cockpit and open the food for him and handed it to him, before looking at Din with still smiling and asked again, “And the language?”

You could feel his eyes study you for a second before he tilted his head and replied, “Mando’a, it is the language of the Mandalorian people. It is something I was taught as I was being raised by the Mandalorians, and it is very important to Mandalorian culture that all Mandalorian children are taught the language.”

Your smile broadened as he told you this. Din has never quite come out and said it explicitly that he saw Grogu has his own child, as his son. But what he just told you, and by his secret actions these last few months more than proved the bond and connection he had formed with the cute little child sitting on your lap at that moment just absolutely gnawing and destroying the hard ration bar you had handed him. The practical admittance warmed your chest and caused tears to well up in your eyes, though they did not fall. Then you replied with a whisper saying, “Wow, that is very beautiful and a great way for a child to bond with their parent or parents,” it was then that you kind of trailed off feeling nervous at the thought that popped into your head, so you looked away from the visor of the helmet watching you intently, “And, um, this only applies to the children?”

You could feel the confusion flowing off of Din after you asked this question, it was quite obvious that he was trying to figure out how to respond or even what you yourself were thinking. The two of you sat in silence for a long while, and it wasn’t until after Grogu had finished one ration bar and you had him drink some water before handing him a second that you finally heard Din’s deep voice speak up, and you would rather not admit it, but you did jump slightly when he spoke up because after such a long pause you had begun to think that he was not going to answer the question nor continue this conversation.

“Do... Cyare, do you want to learn Mando’a,” and as he asked this question you could hear an almost breathless shock to his voice that made you look up at him and see that he was almost completely leaning out of his chair in an attempt to be closer to you. Shyly you bit your lip and nod before speaking up, “I just thought that it would be nice to have something all three of us could do you know? And I have been wanting to learn more about your culture because I know it means so much to you…..”

Again a silence engulfs the three of you, and the tension was almost palpable, though Grogu acted absolutely indifferent to the thickness in the air. As the tension kept building more and more, you got more and more anxious. Eventually, it got to be too much for you to handle and you decided to speak up and take the words back, scared you had made Din uncomfortable, but Din beat you to it, “If you would like, we can start with the word I was teaching Grogu when you came up here?”

The smile that grew on your face from the excitement hurt your cheeks because they had never stretched as wide as they did at that moment. You nodded eagerly, crossing your arms more tightly around the small child you still held in your lap. Din nodded and spoke up after a moment, “The word we were working on is cyare’se, this is the word we use to say loved ones.”

You nodded and took a second before trying to say it yourself, and when you did you knew right away you absolutely butchered the word, and it just did not come out as smoothly as it did when Din had said it. You could feel the heat rising in your face from embarrassment, but then Din nodded and said, “Not bad for you’re first attempt, try again. Cyare’se, shar - AY - say.”

This time after he said the word again, he broke down the pronunciation much like he had been doing for Grogu, and if you were honest with yourself it did make it much easier to understand all the components of the word, so this time when you tried to say it, you started off saying it slowly as Din had done, before putting it all together and saying the word near perfectly. And much like he had also done for Grogu, Din praised you saying, “Absolutely perfect, cyare. I could have not said it better myself.”

Grinning widely again, you giggle and said, “That’s where I recognized the word from! That name you are always calling me, it sounds like the beginning of cyare’se. What does that one mean,” you asked earnestly and Din chuckled slightly in response before looking to the side himself, from what you could only assume to be shiness.

“Well, cyare is much like a pet name in Basic. It, uh, means loved or beloved.”

(If you would like to be tagged in the remaining Mando May prompts let me know! Not all will revolve around Din and Grogu though! Thank you for reading and all likes and REBLOGS are appreciated!)

[ravensbug]

hi so i can came from another tumblr user and i wanted to ask if maybe you could do a lin x pregnant!reader? i completely understand if you’re not comfortable with that, because the other user wasn’t but i just wanted to ask. thank you!

Little One

Fandom: Legend of Korra

Ship: Lin Beifong x Pregnant!reader

Request: Yes

Prompt: No

Word Count: 1277

A/N: Ok, first off I am SO SORRY this took so long. This semester has given me an even bigger workload and then more stuff has started happening that’s just stressing me out. Totally am not trying to recall my mother’s stories about how her pregnancies were with my sister and me. I didn’t really know I needed this version of Lin in my life until now. Don’t know if this exactly what you were looking for, but I hope it is.

Summary: You’re in the last week of your pregnancy and you’re due any day now. Lin has been staying home with you for months, not even going to the station at this point. But of course, the one time she does go, you go to the hospital because of the baby. Thankfully everything goes the way it should and Lin arrives right after.

Lin had gotten Kya to come over to the house so you weren’t left alone. You told Lin that you would have been fine by yourself, but you knew having Kya there wasn’t a bad idea. You were due anytime in these next few days and having someone with you in case something happened is smart. Of course, Lin hadn’t left your side for the past 3 months.

You were surprised that Lin Beifong, the woman who was practically married to her job, hadn’t gone into the precinct in 3 months. It was flattering, but you knew the amount of work she would have to deal with when she got back. Even with Saikhan running things in her absence.

Lin hadn’t told you the reason she had to go out today, or how long she would be gone. You assumed it might be some time since she had Kya come over. However, Lin always wanted someone with you at all times. Like she didn’t say it 20 times a day anyways.

“I really shouldn’t worry about why she’s gone out, but I can’t help it.” You walked around and sat down on the couch carefully. You had grabbed a snack, even though Kya had offered to grab it for you.

“It’s reasonable why you worry, but she’s fine. I’m pretty sure she’s more worried about you than herself at this point.” Kya reassured you.

“Kya, like she’s ever worried about herself? That woman literally gave her bending away to protect the last airbenders and didn’t want an ounce of respect from it.”

“Selflessness. The main definition of your wife,” Kya playfully rolled her eyes.

“Yeah. Sometimes I love her for it, sometimes I hate her for it,” you sighed.

“At least you don’t have to add being her healer to all of that. I wouldn’t know how you two would be together if you were.”

“I’m very persuasive, Kya,” you smirked. She laughed in response, but she knew it was true. Lin’s told her a few stories while being healed.

You two continued talking and you snacked while Kya talked. It was nice to talk to someone different although you would never get tired while talking with Lin. You would let her go on endless rants about work or things she liked. She would apologize, but you loved it when she would talk about something so passionately, even if she was upset.

Kya was in the middle of explaining something to you when you felt an awkward sensation. It felt like a pop and you didn’t know why it happened. That was until a few seconds after.

“Kya….” you interrupted her.

Kya didn’t need to say anything when she looked and saw the expression on your face. You both knew your water had just broke.

“Right, ok. Let’s get you to the hospital.”

“What about Lin? She doesn’t even know. What if she gets home and we’re not here?”

“I’ll make sure that someone finds her. Right now I just need you to worry about yourself and the baby. Not so much the baby, that’s more of my job.”

Lin knows you would scold her for going to the station when you were due any day, but she really couldn’t handle not being there anymore. Even if it was just to check in on things. However, checking in on things soon turned into her actually doing some paperwork.

“Chief, you should really be home with your wife. This paperwork can be done by someone else.” Saikhan was standing in front of her desk as she was working on a simple paper.

“Just this last one and I’ll be out of your way Saikhan,” Lin argued.

“Lin, your wife is due any day. Go home.” He waited for Lin to finish writing whatever sentence she was on and took the paper from her.

“Fine. But you better get that done correctly.” She stood up to leave the precinct. As she grabbed her coat one of the officers open the door with a face full of mixed emotions.

“What is it?” Lin and Saikhan responded at the same time.

“Cheif, your wife,” he had to pause to catch his breath. “She’s gone into labor.”

Most of the senior officers hadn’t seen Lin run out of that building so fast since the last time someone had tried to kidnap you. Even then, some thought Lin was moving even faster now.

Lin had promised herself she wouldn’t go speeding to the hospital if this had happened, but she wanted to so badly. She definitely cursed at the spirits for doing this to her because thoughts of things that could go wrong while she wasn’t with you were running rampant in her mind.

It had taken her almost half an hour to get to the hospital. She also cursed at whoever designed the city that way.

Lin practically barged into the main entrance and everyone looked her way. She wasn’t mad, she would never be mad about this happening, but most assumed that she was since they didn’t know her like you did.

She took a deep breath before asking the desk nurse where you were.

“She’s in room 204.” The nurse pointed down the hall. “Oh, Chief Beifong! They’re fine, just go in quietly.” That information was enough for Lin to put it all together and she smiled.

“Thank you.” She turned and started walking towards the room you were in. She had the widest grin on her face and she felt so giddy and excited.

When she turned the corner and got closer to your room she willed herself to calm her nerves. The nurse had said to be quiet when entering and she had a few guesses as to why.

The door to your room was slightly ajar, enough for Lin to see the edge of the bed as well as your feet under the blankets. She quietly knocked on the door before opening it more.

Kya stood up out of the chair she was sitting in at the sound of Lin knocking. You and she looked over at Lin, who had this wide grin on her face.

“Told you someone would tell her. Didn’t take too long for her to get here.” Kya smiled. She made her way out of the room to give you two privacy.

The baby was currently asleep in your arms so you couldn’t really move. You also didn’t want to move because you were still sore.

“You can come over here and look at her y’know,” you smiled.

“Her?” Lin asked but she didn’t need you to elaborate. Both of you didn’t want to know the gender of the baby because it could get out before it was born and then there would be expectations and press everywhere.

Lin walked over and finally got to see the baby’s face. Her daughter’s face. She was so beautiful and innocent. Lin said she hated little children and even babies, but right now there wasn’t a single bit of hatred. How could she hate anything right now?

“Did you decide on a name? I know you were still looking at a few for a girl,” Lin asked.

“Yeah, I did actually. Kya and I talked a little about it. She’s got plenty of experience helping narrow down names.”

“What did she help you pick?” Lin asked.

“I settled on Keena.” Lin smiled at your answer. That was one of the ones she had liked the most, but she chose to leave the naming to you.

“Perfect,” Lin smiled. “I love you both so much.” Lin gave you a kiss and lightly kissed Keena on the forehead.

[love-jesus-but-i-drink-a-little]

The Haunting of Bly Manor (Dani x Jamie) fanfiction (ao3):

Tell It To Me Singing - Five pictures of a perfectly strange life

God Knows How She’ll Survive The Gush Of You (Spilling And Spilling From The Basin Of Your Hips Like Warm Bathwater) - Dani and Jamie's second time. Basically, an excuse to write a smutty little fic

Beneath Your Skin (Inside Everything That Glows) - Jamie meets a blonde au pair at the dinner table and is destined to fall in love

Let Me Stay Tender Hearted (Despite Despite Despite) - A 20k one shot of sweet, sad, and comfortable moments in between scenes

Another Day Spent Slipping Away From You - A smutty short one-shot about wondering hands and eager mouths

Oh My Soul Let Me Be In Your Now (Look Out Through My Eyes Look Out At The Things You Made) All Things Shining - Post Dani's death. grief & healing

Singing Praise To One Pair Of Hands - Basically, a super gay short one-shot about Jamie's hands

I dreamed Of Understanding The Sky (Or Touching Your Skin Somewhere Beyond The Bit Of Darkness) - Dani and Jamie just want a moment in which they are not interrupted, when they can sink into each other for the first time in weeks

I Don't Know About The Lake (But Every Time You Say My Name You Make Ripples In Me) -  A three-part piece in which Dani Clayton is something uniquely designed for Jamie to crave and love and cherish, and Jamie is the home Dani's been always searching for.

Fear Feels Like This (A Clenched Fist Where Yyour Throat Used To Be) -  Sometimes, the only way to coax Dani out of deep dark misery of fear and loneliness and dense scary jungle is with soft kisses and determined hands and idle fingers ready to ground her back to earth. Jamie knows how to do it. Every. Single. Time.

She Pins You To Doors, Not A Goddess Anymore (She Still Looks Like Religion. She Kisses You Godless) - A Tumblr prompt from a sweet anon: "I give you a prompt: Damie and snow :) And if you have other fics where snow is involved please can you share them?"

Fire Under Feet Hot Blood In Your Belly (It’s Not Something You Ever Thought Of Doing) - A vague attempt at plot more like an excuse to indulge in Damie's smut with added cheekiness, because they are idiots in love

Who Were You Before They Touched You (Pressed You Into The Quiet Concave Of The Earth) - A vague attempt at plot more like an excuse to indulge in Damie's smut with added angst, because they were scared before they were happy

Come Here (Let Me Love Those Bruises Out Of You) - A vague attempt at plot more like an excuse to indulge in Damie's smut with added feelings

Was This The Face That Launched A Thousand Ships (And Burnt The Topless Towers Of Ilium)? - A vague attempt at plot more like an excuse to indulge in Damie's domestic smut with added fluff

Today I Love You Like Salt - Five times Dani learns something about Jamie and five times they heal through touching

I Don't Know About The Lake (But Every Time You Say My Name You Make Ripples In Me) - A three-part piece in which Dani Clayton is something uniquely designed for Jamie to crave and love and cherish, and Jamie is the home Dani's been always searching for

You Moan Gospels Around Her Fingers (Between Your Teeth) - (6/6) Five times Dani and Jamie could have slept together and one time they actually did

You Demand The Labour Of Love (For The Same Reason The World Made Wheat But Not Bread) - Jamie wants to know about Dani's past, so Dani tells her. A small one shot about best friends, secret desires and accidental kisses that make Jamie slightly jealous

You Dream In Pink (And Wake Up With Fairytales Caught On Your Tongue) - A long one-shot in which Jamie is trying to figure Dani out, Owen and Hannah are soft and Dani is a soft nervous wreck

You Wake (Aching How You've Longed For Touch For So Much Of Your Bodied Time) - A small one-shot of anxious but lovely life and a glimpse of Viola's own awakening

It's Only Water It's Only Fire It's Only (love It's Only Slaughter We're Only Liars, It's Only Blood) - Small moments of hurt and slaughter and pain, but also of love and of kisses and of a life well spent

A Knife Making Love To A Wound (The Sweet Scrape Of A Match Lighting The Lamp Of Her Mouth) - If Dani and Jamie had a chance of a miracle, they'd do it all the same

The Last of Us Part II (Ellie x Dina) fanfiction (ao3):

A World Made Of Numbers (Echoes Of Light Shining Out Of The Midst Of Nothing) - A long one-shot about Ellie's time in Jackson. It's very poetic and comfortable and they play like children, without the pain

Crashing Waves On An Empty Beach (Two Drowning Lovers Lost At Sea) - Ellie is not alone

I Love Your Rough Edges And Soft Parts That Bleed (I Choose Solitude Over Cold Kisses) - Ellie goes back to Jackson and Dina is too happy not to take her back. Also, there is shower sex

Under Her Touch (All Of Me Shudders) - (unfinished) Five times Ellie and Dina had to run for their lives + one time they didn't

Because Nothing Makes Me Happier (And Nothing Makes Me Sadder) Than You - Dina's POV on small events leading to the main story

You Deserve A Dark Haired Lover With Soft Eyes And A Heart Full Of Love - Ellie and Dina meet again

You Are My stubborn compass (Always Pointing Me Back Home) - Sex in abandoned apartments, cute apocalypse girlfriends, and some violence

I Am Always A Stomach Full Of Teeth And Need (It Is Greedy And Hungry And Today I Taste Like Wine) - Ellie can't look herself in the eyes but she can't stop looking at Dina. She can't stop kissing and touching her either

The Leather And The Lace Of You (Your Flushed Cheeks & What Set Them Ablaze) - Ellie is angry and Dina is the only one who knows how to calm her down

What Is Stronger Than The Human Heart Which Shatters Over And Over And Still Lives - Ellie and Dina are stupidly in love, picking a name for a baby is hard and Ellie is a gentle dumbass

A Cathedal Of Light And Your Eyes An Open Pasture Of Colour - Ellie and Dina are in love. There is also bonfires and guitars and quiet songs and passionate sex

I Wrote My Own Story And Still Said All The Wrong Things (All The Shouting I Did About Your Mouth) - A story about big cities and small girls and broken bones and soft kisses

I Hope One Day Somebody Loves You So Much That They Do Not Waste Their Time Trying To Fix You - Five times Ellie asks Dina to tell her a story + one time she doesn't

Sore Muscles Have Always Been A Sign Of Growth (My Heart Looks Like A Bruise And I Almost Don’t Mind) - Ellie and Dina are incredibly horny and it's hard to focus on anything that isn't each other

I'm In Love With My Anger My War-Won Body Tense And Vicious - Some in-between moments, some first meetings, some mutual pining

Maybe Home Is Somewhere I’m Going And Never Have Been Before - Ellie has one destiny and it's Dina, and she's too blinded by revenge to see it

[vices-aand-virtues]

As we make our way into the final episodes of Younger, I have some Thoughts™️

1. I have seen a lot of talk about how Liza would be better off alone than with Charles because then she is right back where she started when the series begins. Though likely is part of her thought process, this is incorrect for a couple of reasons. First, Liza is in a completely different place in her life than she was when we first met her. She has a fabulous career in publishing and, even when they’re not together, the support of Charles. She doesn’t have a baby at home to take care of; Charles’s daughters are old enough to be relatively self-sufficient in terms of not needing someone to watch over them all the time. Then we have to look at all of this together and realize this, the second point: Liza didn’t think she could + wasn’t allowed to have both a career and a family most of her life. Now she has seen that she not only can do it, she’s great at it. She is extremely successful and loves her work, but still has time for her daughter and form/maintain a solid relationship with Nicole and Bianca. She still makes time for the things that are important to her outside of work. She gave up part of herself to stay at home and be just a wife and just a mom for almost two decades. Then she gave up some of herself to maintain her lie. Now she’s thriving at work and fully and openly herself for the first time in YEARS. For to have a brilliant career with more to come AND a wonderful partner/husband/whatever is a WONDERFUL resolution for her based on where she started.

2. To have this much Liza/Charles tension and back and forth and more “will they won’t they” AGAIN, after waiting 5 seasons for them to get together, just over one full season of them actually together, only for them not to end up together is absurd and makes no sense. Liza has had this entire season to accept that she and Charles are donezo and move on, but she hasn’t, and not for lack of trying. It’s more clear every episode how drawn to one another they are despite themselves. To put them through all that for a contrived “girl power” ending would be a huge disservice to the characters and the show.

3. Speaking of, I’m exhausted by “girl power” endings of late because they’re inorganic and forced. It’s supposed to come across as empowering for a woman to choose her career over love or a relationship, but it’s actually just a sexist take from the opposite end of the spectrum. Women can have both!! We are 20 years into the 21st century!! A woman can PRIORITIZE her career over romantic entanglements, but women don’t — and shouldn’t!! — have to choose at this point. We already know that Liza isn’t defined by her relationship to a man. We know she is a strong woman who isn’t afraid to ask for + take + go after what she deserves. I don’t need to see her choose her career because she is already thriving! She does not have to be alone for X number of years so she can get her career on track. It’s there. She’s on the journey. What would benefit her most would be something she hasn’t had before — a steady and fully supportive long-term partner. Imagine what it would be like for her to finally be married or lifelong committed to someone she is wildly in love with, who is wildly in love with her, who also fully supports her career, is her biggest cheerleader, who believes in her and sees her talents more clearly than anyone else. Hello!!

4. Liza is clearly still very in love with Charles and vice versa. In the past, when her relationships have ended, the desire to get back together was pretty one-sided. It wasn’t, like, super easy for her to get over, but she made peace with it and moved on. That has yet to happen. She just can’t let Charles go completely. She is trying to be supportive of his relationship and assures him she just wants him to be happy, but we have heard her say more than once that she is still in love with him, and her actions are pretty indicative of that as well.

5. Until S7, Charles has always chosen Liza. Even given the current circumstances, he still keeps choosing her in a different way. He knows she is on his side. He knows she is great at her job. He knows she supports him. No matter their relationship status, he knows those things to be true. That’s why he always takes her up on any offers she makes to him in S7 — because he knows who she is. He chooses her to be his work partner or support system or his sounding board. And she allows herself to be chosen; she ASKS to be chosen. He doesn’t have to accept and she doesn’t have to offer, but they do it anyway. It’s a conscious daily choice they continue to make.

6. Charles would never in a million years marry Quinn because she wouldn’t be a good stepmother to his daughters. We may have seen ~some~ dimension from Quinn, but ultimately she’s a ruthless, manipulative, conniving snake. She’s fake and primarily has a “what’s in it for me” attitude. There’s no way Charles would want that to be the example his daughters live with, and honestly I don’t think Pauline would even allow it. If he thought Liza’s baggage created complications for his custody, I cannot even imagine the turmoil Quinn would cause. Quinn is a loose cannon. Pauline is a little bit of a bitch when it comes to Liza, but she’s smart enough to know/see who Quinn really is, and with Liza, it’s at least “the devil you know.”

7. It would be completely nonsensical for Charles and Quinn to get married/end up together because a) we barely know her and b) he was just proposing to Liza. From both a logical and writing standpoint, it doesn’t make sense. It would be some piss poor storytelling for that to happen. On the flip side, it would make sense for Josh to end up with Clare, a late-entry side character, because we have known her longer and know they have a history. The same can’t be said about Charles and Quinn. If Quinn hadn’t become so involved with Empirical, if she had just been another author, her relationship with Charles would be about as meaningful as his relationship with Rhada. But since we see her through Liza’s eyes and we see her be an annoying presence at Empirical post-Charliza split, it seems like a bigger deal than it actually is.

8. Putting her back with Josh at this point would be a worse ending than Game of Thrones. It would be a twist that came out of nowhere that writers would justify by saying the signs were there all along. Liza more than once has made clear that she has chosen Charles over Josh. She has showed us that’s the case. For her to suddenly have an epiphany with two episodes left, especially considering how little shared screen time they have, would be total fanservice and a complete regression from all the growth they BOTH have had. It’s also, like, not fair to Josh to keep waiting on her and hoping she will come back? He deserves some reciprocity and stability too?

9. We have seen only the benefits when it comes to Charles being impulsive in matters of the heart...until now. I totally understand his heartache at her counter proposal and I, personally, think she’s being stupid. But regardless, I think for him to just walk away from their relationship at that point was a pretty knee-jerk reaction that he didn’t think through. And I think his pride is a little hurt over his perception of her not WANTING to marry him, so instead of trying to work it out or compromise, he’s digging his heels in. He jumped into a relationship with Quinn, which was clearly impulsive. Rational, level-headed Charles would not have done that. In fact, he laughs off the suggestion of it in S5 and says the iconic, “divorced moms from Jersey are more my style.” I believe cooler heads will prevail.

10. I REFUSE TO BE VICTIM TO ANOTHER SHIP WHOSE TENSION AND FEELINGS WERE TEASED AND BUILT UP OVER 5 SEASONS ONLY FOR THEM TO BREAK UP OVER SOMETHING STUPID AFTER ONE AND A HALf SEASON AS A COUPLE AND THEN GET BACK TOGETHER IN THE LAST 5 MINUTES!!!! I WILL NOT!!

Anyway Team Charles 4 Lyfe. Here’s hoping these idiots in love stop being idiots and start being just IN LOVE.

[aster-ion]

Sylvie x Loki Might Not Happen and Here’s Why

***SPOILERS FOR LOKI TV SHOW***

1.  They are basically siblings

Even though they have different personalities, backstories, and physical appearances, that doesn't change the fact that they are the genetic equivalent of siblings. No matter what Timeline you're looking at, both Sylvie and Loki are the offspring of Laufey and whoever he had children with. We know this because they are Variants of the exact same person, meaning that if either of them were born to someone other than Laufey, they would have been pruned as a baby. And since they weren't, that means they must be just as genetically similar as siblings are.

Because of this, the idea of Sylvie and Loki engaging in any kind of romantic or sexual relationship is extremely disturbing to a lot of fans. It's too big an oversight to brush past, especially when the show has continued to remind us over and over that they are, in fact, both Lokis. Maybe if them being the same person wasn't such a major plot point, it would be easier to ignore the facts, but it is, and that means that Marvel is basically pushing either an incest or selfcest (depending on how you look at it) type relationship. And that’s extremely risque for a corporation as large as Marvel, especially with a character as beloved by fans as Loki. 

2.  It is terrible LGBTQ+ representation

And before anyone says anything, no, it is not because Sylvie is portrayed as female and Loki as male. I've seen a lot of Sylvie x Loki shippers say that the reason people don't like the couple is due to it being one between a male and female, but that's not true. Loki and Sylvie were both confirmed to be bisexual, meaning that they can engage in a relationship with anyone of any gender. It would be completely valid for either of them to pursue romance with someone of a different sex and still be bisexual. No one is arguing against that, and if they are, I definitely do not agree with them.

However, the problem comes in when you take into account Marvel and Disney's (who owns Marvel) long history of queerbaiting. There have been countless times that Disney advertises their "first gay character!" only for it to be a single line of dialogue or a brief shot. Marvel in particular has used the popularity of certain LGBTQ+ ships and headcanons in their fanbase to generate media popularity that they don't actually follow through with in their movies/shows. So when Loki was confirmed to be both genderfluid and bisexual in Episode Three, lots of people felt like they were finally getting a win for representation. 

But those people, myself included, appear to have been let down again. The first two official queer characters had so much potential to go off and be with anyone they wanted, but instead, the show has set them up to be in a romance with each other. Now, this wouldn't be problematic on it's own, but when you take into consideration the questionable nature of their romance from Point One as well as the fact that the show has explicitly referred to it as "twisted," it raises the question of whether or not this is actually good representation. Because the fact is, in one episode the writers went “look, it’s two queer people!” and in the next, they said “their relationship is disgusting and demented.” Marvel’s first bisexual characters being borderline incestuous/selfcestuous does not sit well with me at all.

All of this is made even more confusing when you take into account the background of the Loki crew, most notably, the director Kate Herron. She also directed the Netflix series Sex Education, which has quite a bit of very well done representation of all kinds. So how is she managing to fail so badly on this project? It makes me wonder whether she truly is just losing her touch or if this is all a misdirection. Personally, I'm hoping for the latter.

3.  It does not send the "self love" message people seem to think it does

The writers, director, and cast of Loki have said multiple times that the relationship between Sylvie and Loki is meant to act as a metaphor for self love. And in a way, that makes a lot of sense. Despite creating different identities for themselves over time, they are still ultimately the same person and therefore share a special bond because of it. And there's a lot of potential that can be done with that concept.

Loki is an extremely complex and intriguing character. He has experienced a lot of trauma in his past that has shaped him into the person he is today. And that person is clearly very broken. He has never given away or received any kind of love, with the exception of his mother and possibly his brother, Thor. Other than that, he's had no healthy friendships, romances, or perception of himself. It makes sense for him to be confused by this pull he feels towards Sylvie, who is both alarmingly alike and vastly different from himself.

Something this series does exceptionally well is breaking Loki out of his comfort zone. He is finally forced to see himself from other people's perspectives. It started with the file Mobius showed him in the first episode. Loki was able to view his actions apart from himself, and was hit with the realisation that he had been hurting people, and he didn't like that. 

Loki is also confronted by the existence of the Time Keepers and the TVA, who describe him as an antagonist and nothing more. To them, his role is to make those around him look better, even if that means he repeatedly gets the short end of the stick. Mobius mentions that he disagrees with this and that Loki "can be whoever and whatever he wants, even someone good," adding another layer of depth as to who Loki could be in the future of the series. 

Another huge moment for Loki's character development is while in the Time Loop Prison with Sif. Though he starts out annoyed with the situation and recalls not feeling apologetic when he cut off Sif's hair, the longer he is in the loop, the more he changes. Loki admits things to himself that we have never seen him say aloud, such as the fact that he is a narcissist that craves attention. Sif telling Loki over and over that he deserves to be alone makes Loki question whether or not he believes that to be true, allowing him an introspective moment where he really has to think about who he is. 

Now with all of that being said, I'd like to tie in why this is important to the writing of Loki and Sylvie. They act as a mirror to one another, representing both the flaws and strengths of "what makes a Loki a Loki." For once, Loki gets an honest, unbiased look at himself without layers of expectations or self doubt. On Lamentis, he calls Sylvie "amazing" and praises her for all her accomplishments. That's a huge moment for him because it shows that despite also finding her irritating, he can look past those traits and see someone worth being a hero underneath. And through that realisation, he begins to understand that he can also grow to love himself. That kind of character development for Loki is incredible to watch, and it's the kind of character development I want to see from this series. Unfortunately, them possibly engaging in a romantic relationship will ruin it.

Whenever I'm feeling insecure about myself and my abilities, the solution has never been to look at who I am through a romantic lens. Self love is an entirely different type of love from romantic love, so if the series tries to push this relationship as a romance, it will fail to truly represent the arc that they are trying to show.

4.  Nobody likes it 

This one's a little on the nose, but it's true. Almost no one likes this ship, and more than that, most people actively hate it. Yes, there is a small minority that like Loki and Sylvie together, but there is an overwhelmingly larger group that is disgusted and angry by the fact that the show paired them up.

After Episode 4 aired, I ranted for about an hour and a half with a friend about how much we didn't want them together. My aunt whom I have never texted reached out to me to say that she hated their relationship. My homophobic neighbour came over and told me that she would prefer any other romance to this. Friends that I haven't talked to much since school let out for summer have all agreed that they collectively dislike Loki x Sylvie. This ship has brought people together purely because everyone hates it more than they hate each other.

There is no denying that the general feedback for Loki and Sylvie being a couple has been negative, even if you support them getting together for some reason. So if there are so many people out there who don't like it, I'm confused as to how it would be approved by a team of professionals.

5.  The contradicting information we have gotten so far

Before the release of Episode Four, Kate Herron said that the relationship between Loki and Sylvie was “not necessarily romantic.” During the interview, she continued to refer to them as friends and people who found solace and trust in each other.

However, after Episode Four, the head writer, Michael Waldron, and other members of the crew spoke up about Sylvie and Loki. They said things like “it just felt right that that would be Loki’s first real love story” and “these are two beings of pure chaos that are the same person falling in love with one another.” These kinds of comments very heavily imply something romantic, directly contradicting what Kate Herron said. Even Tom Hiddleston, the actor for Loki, has assessed the situation, highlighting the differing viewpoints. He’s also said before that the end of Episode Four ultimately has Loki getting in his own way. 

Now, this could all just be a misdirection on either side to build suspense for the show, but as of right now, it is entirely unclear who is telling the truth. Though it is more likely that the statements made by Michael Waldron are more accurate (as he is the writer), there is still a slight possibility that Loki x Sylvie won’t happen. I’ll link the articles I’ve found on this topic below so you can read them and decide for yourself. 

Kate Herron Statement - https://www.cbr.com/loki-sylvie-relationship-not-romantic/ 

Michael Waldron Statement - https://www.marvel.com/articles/tv-shows/loki-sylvie-in-love 

Tom Hiddleston Statement - https://thedirect.com/article/loki-tom-hiddleston-sylvie-romance 

6.  It is still salvageable

The odds are not in our favour, I’m afraid. It is highly probable that the show will put Loki and Sylvie in a romantic relationship with each other. Yet there is still a way to salvage it and turn their bond into something incredibly satisfying. Like I mentioned in Point Three, the relationship between Loki and Sylvie has the potential to be incredibly empowering and provide both characters some much-needed growth. And I believe that while unlikely, it can still do that. 

The only mention of them being romantically interested in each other came from Mobius, who at the time was angry, betrayed, and doing anything he could to get Loki to talk. Then, at the end of the episode, right before Loki is about to confess something important to Sylvie, he is pruned. This results in no explicit confirmation from either Loki or Sylvie that they are in love with each other. The audience is left not knowing whether Mobius was correct in his speculations, and honestly, I don’t think Loki knows either.

Loki is no expert on love, as I explained earlier. It is entirely possible that he doesn’t grasp how he feels about Sylvie and defaults to romance because of what Mobius said. There is undoubtedly some sort of deep bond forming between them, and I would love to see that being explored in the next two episodes. I would love to watch Loki’s journey of realising that he doesn’t want anything romantic with Sylvie, and was simply confused by the new things he was feeling towards her. Loki even says “this is new for me” when talking to Sylvie at the end of Episode Four. Him momentarily believing that he wants to be a couple with her then shifting into them becoming friends who help each other grow is still a reality that could happen. And ultimately, I think that would benefit them both as characters as well as strengthen the overall message of the show.

In a show about self love, acceptance of yourself, and figuring out who you want to be, Loki very much needs people who support him. He has that in Mobius already, and now he’s beginning to have it in Sylvie as well. I just hope that it is done in a way that resonates with the audience and subverts expectations, which just cannot be done through some twisted romantic relationship. I’ve spoken to others watching the show and seen people talking online, and everyone seems to agree that Loki and Sylvie work much better as platonic soulmates or found family than a couple. 

Of course, my hopes aren’t that high up. While I’d love for this to happen, I’ve been let down by Marvel before and wouldn’t be surprised if they went for the easy route of pairing characters up rather than dealing with the emotions correctly. Still, I have hope for this series. Everything else about it is wonderful and perfect in every way. It has the potential to become a masterpiece and easily the best thing that Marvel has ever done. However, this romance would ruin it for me and so many others. We already feel incredibly disappointed by Loki x Sylvie being suggested, so I can’t even begin to fathom how people will react if the show makes it canon. I’m begging Marvel to please do better than this. They have a wonderful story to tell and a wonderful team to do it, and I hope from the bottom of my heart that they don’t throw that away.