#I can elaborate later lmfao

[elvenoracled]

Can’t stop thinking about the duality between Adaine’s oracle status & her anxiety. How many of those panic ridden thoughts were actually visions? How do you even differentiate between the two? How do you begin to sort unreality from reality when so much of your life is based in things that aren’t real (yet)?

[brandwhorestarscream]

thinly veiled sex cult au 👀

I need you to know that i get really excited whenever i see you in my ask box because you always enable my wildest nonsense XD ty for that, please never change

SO THE THINLY VEILED SEX CULT AU

I can't take full credit for the initial inception of this AU. Look up Quiet_Shadow on AO3 if you wanna have a look at the source material. Specifically their fic titled Undercover Woes. Great read, 10/10 highly reccomend

BUT ANYWAY!!

The thinly veiled sex cults are on cybertronian agricultural planets (independent governance, not affiliated with autobots or decepticons), and they grow energon crystals that are refined into fuel and exported. When Cybertron goes dark, they're the only sources of food in the universe. Not important rn tho!

Vast majority of the agricultural planets' land is rural, with little pockets of small town suburbia here and there functioning as "big cities". Little energon farming villages are typically made up of 15-25 properties, incredibly tight knit and close little communities. Incredibly quaint and charming, if not for the aforementioned sex cults

Pretty much every small town you come across is one of said sex cults. Public interfacing isn't just accepted, it is expected. Sex is how they pray to Primus, and these villages are hella religious. When they marry, there's a public consummation. They have rather strict roles that each mecha in a couple fulfills: the conjunx is the more dominant partner who does the spiking and primarily works the fields and does all the heavy labor. The endura is the more submissive partner, designated to carry their sparklings. When they enter a union, the future endura will have their modesty panel removed and melted down to make their wedding rings, and they even start wearing dresses to maintain their modesty 🤭 they have sex parties, festivals centered around fertility and conception, and absolutely no contraception is allowed. As you can imagine, that leads to farmers having pretty big families with lots of sparklings running around

Now consider 👀 assigning aome of our favorite mecha to live in one of these farming villages. Some outsider crash landing there! Perhaps going undercover as a newlywed couple in one such community. Wouldn't that be juicy?

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

random percy headcanons:

wants to be the photographer friend SO bad and he technically is but like 70% of the pics come out blurry or weird bc there was a monster attack in the middle of them. his instagram is truly so chaotic looking.

literally always has seashells on him someone will ask him for a pencil or spare change and he has to empty all his pockets of shells to find it. drops his backpack and a bunch of shells fall out. kicks his shoes off and sand and shells fly out and his mortal friends are like percy What the Fuck

his eyes glow underwater!! bioluminescent king. no one told him though and he didn't find out until he joined his school's swim team and terrified everyone (he managed to convince them his contacts were having a weird reaction to chlorine lmao)

he really likes art!! he doesn't just pretend to for rachel's sake he genuinely enjoys painting with her. he likes splatter paint, collages and pop art styles the best. one day after splitting some edibles they realized percy could manipulate water colors and went CRAZY with it

will ask to be excused during class and comes back like an hour later with scorch marks all over his face bleeding from one of his ears covered in dust missing three fingernails rips in his jeans and a fat lip and the teacher is like percy what the actual hell were you doing in the bathroom all this time and he's just like uhhhhhh I have ibs

the brand from camp jupiter did unfortunately (for sally) Unlock something in him lmfao he keeps getting shitty little tattoos. usually stick-n-poke but someone's friends cousin's girlfriend's brother has a gun that gets brought to parties every now and then. most of them are sloppy but you can tell what they are HOWEVER he has one that was supposed to be a seal that came out looking like one of those shitty ms paint crying memes. annabeth laughed at him for ten minutes straight when she saw it.

he wanted to dye his hair blue but he was too chicken to bleach his entire head so he just did the tips. his hair is curly though so it looks absolutely ridiculous but he loves it

percy and annabeth get a crusty little yappy white dog in college and he carries it around like a baby lmao

back to his chaotic instagram, he's got so many pics of him like, relaxing at the bottom of the mariana trench or hugging a giant squid or riding on a whale shark and his mortal friends all think he's just really good at photoshop and this is a very specific bit he decided to commit to. they're always like lol percy where do you even FIND these pictures are you subscribed to like scientific journals for the laughs? but no he just took them all on his shell phone

has an ongoing prank war with annabeth's little brothers bobby and matthew but like it's Unhinged. they're playing 5D chess and she has no idea whats going on

weird tshirts!!! he loves them! like

shit like this or those 'women want me fish fear me' shirts, anything with a funny or incomprehensible slogan is going in his closet right along with his band tees lmfao

bought estelle a panda pillow pet when she was born 🥺

can NOT bring himself to eat seafood no matter how many times poseidon has told him its fine. he's like NO these are my FRIENDS JONATHAN WAS TELLING ME ABOUT HIS GRANDDAUGHTERS WEDDING LITERALLY YESTERDAY WHY IS HE ON A PLATTER DAD. they had to give up and just start eating normal land food at the palace every time he comes to visit lmfao

gets into horsegirl antics with hazel she NEEDS to know everything the horses have to say. they spend hours gossiping in the stables.

movie nights in the poseidon cabin were 10000% a thing and when he was missing annabeth and thalia and grover (and a few others) would still sleep in there every now and then and talk about how much they miss him :(

percy and beckendorf had the worlds most elaborate handshake

he DOES impulse buy stuff just because they're ocean-themed. stuffed animals, home decor, school supplies, clothes, you name it he bought it if theres like a fish on it

has more scars from crashing off his skateboard than he does from monster attacks

grover is somehow the only person who's ever noticed percy is severely claustrophobic

has a deep passion for adele. I can't explain this one I just feel and know it to be true.

he and annabeth both proposed to each other at the same time and they were SO mad about it they kept yelling over each other's speeches lmao

he can SING but he doesn't know it. sally keeps trying to record him singing to himself but something always happens to the camera and she loses the evidence

called chiron a brony one time and mr d thought it was so funny he was nice to percy for an entire week

the camp keeps trying to convince him to teach sword fighting lessons to the younger kids but he can NOT bring himself to swing a sword at a 9 year old so he keeps getting injured

has the most complicated iced coffee order in the world his go-to local coffee shop finally just put the damn drink on the menu and named it after him

he IS the quiet kid in the back of your math class that always has his hood up to try and hide his headphones and eats increasingly elaborate meals out of his backpack when the teacher isn't looking. one time someone caught him with a rotisserie chicken in the middle of a geometry final.

he argued that he DID have enough to share with the class

currently obsessed with the image of him knocking back a container of sea salt as if it was a shot and his mortal friends being like hey! what the actual fuck! and he's just like uhhhhh anemia kills!

its his birthday<3

[akascow]

i keep thinking about the end of this post i made lmfao:

"i like that in the last battle he just accepts it: realizes hes in the same position as future jayce, but just closes his eyes... he knew the only way to get through to viktor wasnt through fighting, but talking. which has been the basis of both of their worldviews for the whole show,, which is WHY IT WORKED"

bc wow i kinda cooked with that one HAHA

(also it like totally relates to the act3 message about how killing is a cycle and the only way to stop the killing is to literally Stop The Killing lmao)

but like, to elaborate on it i just think its so significant given that jayce and viktor were always opposed to killing others or using hextech against ppl less equipped:

-jayce's anti shimmer plan crumbles the second he accidentally kills a zaunite child.

-viktor adamantly opposes the idea of building weapons the entire first season because theyre scientists, not soldiers.

-jayce throws up and almost has a panic attack seeing a bunch of enforcers stain the bridge with blood after the firelight bombs.

-viktor abandons his whole hexcore idea the moment sky dies from it, begging jayce to destroy it

-jayce completely disagrees in the use of hextech weapons even after viktor dies from the attack on the council

their goal was always to use hextech to help, not hurt.

and yes they do stray from that ideology a couple times bc of like,, moments of weakness or wtvr lol:

viktor in his Machine Herald basically killing the body and leaving the soul of everyone who joins his cult i mean harem i mean community,, ((although im pretty certain the hexcore was kinda like a virus- influencing his actions with the main goal of spreading,, and i truly believe he genuinely thought he was helping people and not like, literally killing them lol))

and jayce making some weapons for the strike team later, but you can see hes clearly distraught from breaking another promise to viktor (his wound literally reopens as a metaphor lmao)

and they try to fight each other in order to share their disagreement of the other's actions, viktor tries to make jayce see his vision, doesnt work, he tries to choke him to death. jayce tries to make viktor see that what hes doing is wrong, doesnt work, he blasts vik's puppets with his hammer lmao.

but what does work ? putting down the weapons. in the end they accomplish the mutual goal without violence. mainly because they literally cannot bring themselves to kill the other but

they never really wanted to fight, no less kill, each other in the first place. because they shared that mutual worldview, they were never in favor of violence against their enemies. both of them even show regret while trying to kill each other too. jayce's anomaly screaming trying to pull away from blasting viktor in the chest, and viktor failing to persuade jayce to his side, voicing his apology before attempting to kill him.

jayce gets to the tower and sees hes in the same position as his future self. realizing he cant beat viktor like this, and everything he saw in the future timeline is inevitable, he closes his eyes, tired from fighting. but what does viktor do? does he kill him? turn him into a puppet like the others? no, viktor lets him into his world, letting him see what he sees.

viktor shares his motivation, humanity's weaknesses causes senseless war. but instead of arguing at that, jayce just talks to him, sharing his words of affection. yes humaity has weakness, but what viktor always viewed as weakness is actually what makes people admirable. and jayce hugs him, he shows viktor the truth of what is to come continuing this path, letting viktor know what he knows.

and thats how viktor breaks free. with a hug. practically the exact opposite of violence.

and again, they fix their mistake together, holding hands and embracing each other, sharing that pain and guilt of the fact that they did hurt people, and choosing to take themselves out in pursuit of correcting that mistake.

...and isnt that just beautiful HAHA

[7brownsuga7]

Hi! Can you please write BTS reaction to getting rejected before they can actually confess to their crush? Not directly, just subtly. For example–their crush keeps saying that she would never date a celebrity because a lot of fans will hate and bully her. Also dating a celebrity comes with tons of hassle, secrecy and arguments etc. to let him know she has no romantic feelings).”

Hey!… A year later and here we are.. I’m SO sorry omg😭 (ps: idk I kind of felt like I repeated myself a lot on some of these points so let’s ignore that xoxo)

Namjoon:

When you randomly revealed to him that you would never date a celebrity, you didn’t see the sudden shift on his face. Eyebrows raised. He masked it quickly by giving a smile and asking you to elaborate just because he was ‘curious’

Understands your reasoning but also subtly gives you all the pros of dating a celebrity.

Is very respectful and understanding, this will definitely leave him pondering.

Will give his opinion about it not seeming that bad dating a celebrity, but will brush it off

This hurts him more than he lets on but he’ll never show it

I feel like he won’t push it. Like he’ll respect your reasonings and let it be that. He’d rather be hurt than push you past what you’re comfortable with

He’d rather remain close to you, he doesn’t want to lose you as a whole so he’ll be content on staying friends, as long as you’re around. He values your friendship and connection more than anything

He’ll definitely admire you from a distance and will probably lose himself thinking about what could have been

I can definitely see him putting his emotions into his music. Leaving hints in his lyrics about how he feels as he knows he shouldn’t voice them out loud

Jin:

When you told Jin, he initially laughed it off, masking his disappointment with humour. He’d agree with you and make jokes about it but deep down he’ll obviously be hurt.

Still confesses to you anyways lmfao

Like he’s gonna be upfront and listen to what you’re saying, but still confess because he doesn’t see the point in not

Still despite this he’ll still respect your thoughts and won’t openly ask for anything more.

He would still drop playful comments and hints and flirt but he knows there won’t be anything further and he’ll be okay with that. If you put that boundary in place he’ll definitely respect that, but you know how playful Jin is.

He’s just happy that he can still be friends with you, regardless of his feelings and your thoughts on dating a celebrity

Yoongi:

Yoongi didn’t show any emotion when you told him. He kept his emotions hidden and feelings close to his chest. Allowing you to speak freely about how you felt.

He understands your reasonings and will openly tell you it is hard being a celebrity, let alone date one.

He’s still hurt that the possibility of you two being together is less likely to happen now.

He definitely respects your perspective as he understands the pressures that come with his lifestyle

To be honest, he’s just happy that you’re being real with him, he appreciates that more than anything

But I feel like he would distance himself (knowingly or unknowingly idk) and focus more on his music for sure, expressing himself through that

He’s not gonna ghost you though Lfmao, just give him some time to process it.

Hobi:

When you told Hobi about your views, he couldn’t help but to force the smile on his face. It faltering now and then, but he made sure that his face didn’t express how he truly felt in that moment.

You know how Hobi is. He’s gonna be hurt but he’ll definitely try to stay positive about it all.

He’ll definitely make light of the situation and make jokes, you know how he is

Despite how he feels about you, he’ll still want to continue the friendship how it was going before, cherishing your friendship more than anything. He’ll quietly deal with his feelings separately.

He’ll definitely get over it though, like once he knows you’re not going to be interested, he’ll eventually get over it and the whole romantic feelings he had towards you, even if they may linger a bit deep down inside.

Note: I can also see him in the dance studio dancing to release the stress and his emotions idk

Jimin:

A mix of emotions ran through Jimin, even though he tried his best not to show it.

He’s gonna feel disappointed, sad, and will definitely doubt himself.

He understands how you feel and therefore respects your feelings.

I can see him withdrawing from being around you as he processes everything.

He’ll try not to avoid you, but knowing the things he now knows will be hard for him to see you.

Don’t worry though, he’ll be back because he truly can’t stay away from you and will prioritise your friendship above anything else

Taehyung:

He can’t help the pain in his chest, the sudden drop of reality settling in as he hears the words he fears escape your lips.

He’s able to mask his emotions quite well, not giving you the chance to sense his disappointment

To be truthful, he can empathise with your view. He respects your honesty so much that he can’t really be upset about it.

He will probably make light of the situation

Still, he will reflect on this conversation in his own way, privately so he can bask in his emotions

Probably resulting in him working through his emotions through art or music. I can see him even writing/journaling.

I can see him talking about this with his friends, seeking advice

Your bond will still be cherished despite his feelings, and he will work hard to be a better friend.

Jungkook:

He can’t ignore the sharp ache of disappointment as he listens to your words.

He will definitely beat himself up over this as he has spent his time fantasising about you and what you could have been, now he feels guilty, ashamed and embarrassed.

He will become quiet as he tries to process your words, trying his best to hide his emotions

Despite his feelings, he understands and respects your honesty about the challenges you worry about.

I can see him still try to subtly prove himself and that he could protect you from the pressure of his lifestyle. ( he won’t push your boundaries though) if you’re feelings are still clear and firm then he would accept it.

It will take him time to get over his emotions as he usually wears his heart on his sleeve.

He’s definitely gonna handle the stress by working out lfmao

[preeningpisces]

Gojo NSFW Headcanons

Lemme know if you want me to elaborate/write something about any of these 🩵

I make fun of him a lot in these, I couldn't stop myself I'm afraid

18+ content below the cut, mdni, implied chubby f!reader

◉ We all know he’s a tease, he runs on bastard energy. There may or may not have been a few incidents where he denied too much, took too long, and legit made your pussy dry up—you never let him forget when it happens too. Good, knock this bitch down a peg

◉ Speaking of peg, I think we as a community have agreed this guy is a switch. Being the strongest & always having to be in control makes giving up control appealing & relieving for a lot of ppl, Gojo included

◉ In fact, I think you get the most emotional reactions from Gojo when he’s being submissive because he trusts you & is free to loosen up the tight hold he has over himself. So mushy gushy

◉ Literally does not stfu in bed—he just streams his consciousness when he’s having sex. Everything in his mind just comes out. Which sometimes leads to ridiculous scenarios, like the time he accidentally moaned pizza because he was hungry

◉ Goofy-ass man in bed, but he can be very serious & intense too when he wants to be—yum

◉ Loves loves loves quickies, especially if you’re wearing a skirt and the risk of his cum rolling down your thigh is present. Especially loves it when you're all 'Satoru, we can't do it here >:[' and he relents, and then a few moments later you go '....well, i mean maybe we can just makeout a bit,' and then suddenly he's fingering you, and you're giving him a handjob. Whoops

◉ A live male-whimpering asmr audio, he is noisy af in bed like he doesn’t try to keep quiet at ALL. This makes sneaky sex in public places super stressful, you gotta gag him with his blindfold more often than not

◉ Also likes role play, especially corny porn tropes, like “oh no, I can’t pay for my pizza“ 10/10 super fun time. Y'all are giggling the whole time

◉ Pretty much willing to try anything once, within reason. Has a high sex drive, but isn't too picky about what you do. Very spontaneous, and instinctive--all do, no think. This means there isn’t really a strict ‘I’m dom your sub now’ approach to sex, you two just go with the flow. Sometimes it changes often in one encounter, other times it doesn’t change at all

◉ Bad habit of tearing your clothes off. He’s too excited, and of course he can buy you a new one, so why does it matter?

◉ If he’s blindfolding you, he has to wear his blindfold too; he just thinks it’s too funny. Pretends he can’t see & intentionally misses and feels around like a loser. “I can’t find your pussy!” in an awful Velma impression. God I hate him

◉ I’m sorry I can’t stop thinking of stupid scenarios in bed with him LMFAO

◉ Is a slut and sends you pics all the time, tho sometimes it’ll just be his balls at odd angles for funsies (I literally can’t stop I’m sorry)

◉ Very grope-y. You’ll just be minding your business when this lanky menace comes up behind you, and feels up all your soft parts. He just enjoys squeezing, and kneading anywhere you’re squishy

◉ Unfortunately, he is one of those types that will pinch your belly or love handles, intending it to be flirty. It makes you think he’s poking fun at you, at least in the early stages of your relationship. Eventually you accept he’s doing it because he likes touching you everywhere. I’d say he’ll be respectful and stop touching you, but I’m sorry I don’t think he would tbh 😭 this is why gege murked him

[liketolaugh-writes]

So, lore in the Good GIW AU:

A good amount of my Danny Phantom ghost hunter lore - in all my fics, not just this one - is rooted in the assumption that pre-portal, all the Fentons and the GIW (and all other researchers) had to work from was a slightly more concrete version of the stories we have in the real world. They don't know about Nocturne and Vortex and Pariah Dark; they know about the Bell Witch and Alcatraz and Mary King's Close, and some historical journals/records that they believe are ghost sightings.

(Ignore all debunking that's happened in the real world, let's not be pedantic here.)

'Guardian spirit' is an obsession category; we'll elaborate on this later. There are multiple subcategories, but the GIW hasn't finalized those yet because of their vaguely inadequate sample size. (Ghosts don't use subcategories but the original obsession categories come from them.) (We'll actually see this either next week or the week after in The Life and Death of Danny Phantom.)

'Death-bound' is the term for a couple that died together and whose main obsession is to be together forever.

Newly dead ghosts (usually five years or less) retain their human appearance. They start to shift to a more ghostly one after that, and that can take another five to ten years.

Angel's Ambrosia is, unbeknownst to Danny, a god-tier offering. You could give three of these to Pariah Dark and he would consider it an acceptable gift. At some point, the GIW managed to get one of these by sheer happenstance and cultivated it into a fruiting tree with an elaborate setup of ecto-projectors and filters.

The main reason they're so valuable is because they grow only in areas with a very low ghost population, making their ecto very 'pure.' If a ghost goes to pick one, their aura sullies the taste, and if lots do it, the tree dies. Their best bet is to hover way, way below and hope a fruit falls off, or maybe throw something.

'Liminal' here is a term used by spiritualists, while the ectology term is the standard 'ectocontaminated.' Ghosts don't have an equivalent term because they don't care about ecto-infected humans lmfao.

Summoners get one warning and after that they need a license to summon anything.

I spent way too much time on this.

[thou-babbling-brook]

Maria Thorpe Character Analysis

Well, I simply can’t disappoint the people – aka, the five of you that will read this, lmfao. I’m so serious about this that I’m actually drafting this on a Google doc before I post this rather than just typing random thoughts on my phone. This is going to be a HUGE ramble that probably won’t make a ton of sense, but I hope it’s entertaining regardless. 

Maria Thorpe – a character that Ubisoft probably spent MAYBE thirty minutes thinking about, but that I have not stopped thinking about for like, five years. What a gal. So glad I was not in this fandom in 2012 to witness how HEINOUS people were about her for simply being a woman “in the way” of a M|M relationship. I hope by the end of this ramble, you, too, will see her for the baddie she truly is. 

In this essay, I will delve into Maria’s character to explore why she is so fascinating to me, the implications of her story, and why Ubisoft can actually catch these hands for dumbing her down in AC Revelations. (I'm putting a cut here because it's so fucking long I'm sorry gang)

First off, to understand Maria Thorpe as a character, you have to understand her background. I’m not going to copy and paste her Wiki or anything, but I am going to outline her life (stated and implied) before we meet her.

For those that don’t know, Maria was born an English noblewoman in 1161 – four years before Altaïr was born (okay cougar). Because she was a tomboy and defied many of the social norms for women in the 12th century, she was ostracized by both her parents and her peers. She mentions in The Secret Crusade that her parents tried to force her to conform, which culminated in her first marriage at the age of 18 to Lord Peter Hallaton. She mentions that he was a decent husband, but he didn’t exactly appreciate her more boisterous nature. After all, in 12th century England (especially among nobility), women were to be seen, not heard. She also failed his expectations as a chatelaine and a wife, as she bore him no children. The Bishop of Leicester granted them an annulment to avoid embarrassment to both Peter and Maria’s family. When she returned, she was “persona non grata” to her family and the whole of Leicestershire, especially when her father had already spent her dowry. With no other options, Maria ran away to join the Third Crusade, where she eventually met Robert de Salbé.

You may notice that we don’t actually know a lot about Maria and her life before AC1, which is probably intentional. To me, though, that’s what makes her backstory fascinating – the implications of her environment and what we can reasonably deduce she went through based on historical context. I think anyone who’s taken a seventh-grade social studies class could tell you women had, like, zero rights in 12th-century England – even more so, noblewomen. Maria was raised to be a glorified broodmare – say nothing, have children (two boys and a girl, as she jokes), and run her husband’s household. Clearly, she was the exact opposite of all of these things. Something interesting about Maria’s first marriage is the fact that while it was an annulment, she specifically mentions in The Secret Crusade it was an annulment to save her family further embarrassment – which implies that the marriage was consummated, but all parties wanted it done with. I don’t think I need to elaborate on how common and horrific an experience like that could be, but I think it fuels Maria’s relationship later on with motherhood, especially since she mentions that she was completely uninterested in childrearing and birth (this is a key point I’ll touch on later).

So what? Why does her background matter? It matters because of how historical and cultural context tie in to help form who she is by the time she leaves for the Third Crusade – a desperate, twenty-two-year-old woman, divorced, ostracized from the only family and society she has ever known, having no other choice than to ditch England and head for the Holy Land unless she wants to become a nun. For many men and women alike in the 12th century, this was their only opportunity to become something more than what they were born as, whether it be a serf, a blacksmith, or a noblewoman. Many who left for the Third Crusade left to “take back the Holy Land,” but also to escape or improve their current standings. To me, Maria falls in the second category, and it is this desperation to escape her life that forms her most notable (and later, tragic) characteristic: her undying loyalty.

As a side note, it is also interesting to me that Maria chose to be a soldier rather than a nurse. This is more so my characterization of her, but I think that’s because a) she’s too damn proud and loud to be a nurse, and b) because if she was a nurse, she would more than likely live and be treated the same way she was at home. Truly, if she wants to escape the patriarchy, the only way a woman like Maria could at the time was to join it by blending in. Girly get some therapy.

We’re now at AC1 in the timeline. Hooray! We don’t know when exactly Maria joined the Templars or when she first met Robert, but we can probably assume it was not long after she joined the crusade. As we know from AC1, AC Bloodlines, and The Secret Crusade, Maria disguised herself as a man (more than likely a young boy since she’s got a voice that would fit right into Alvin and the Chipmunks) and was able to keep up the rouse long enough to rise in the ranks and show promise to people like Robert. For Maria, when Robert finds out she is a woman and yet elevates her further, it is the first time in her life that someone has appreciated her for her masculine qualities. It is why she develops an intense loyalty for Robert to the point of being willing to be his decoy, despite the fact she fully anticipated dying. For Maria, it would be her ideal end – fighting to the death for a cause she truly believed in. Not even really a cause, as we figure out later, but more so for a man she truly believed in – Robert. It would not be through the pain and subjugation of childbirth like most women of her standing, but a brutal fight like any other man.

And yet – she doesn’t. When Altaïr meets her, he’s undergone a whole development arc, whereas Maria (at this point 30, which is SO funny to imagine her fistfighting this 26-year-old frat boy) is at the start of hers. And it starts with Altaïr sparing her – the worst possible fate that could become her at this point in her life. Think about it: the only person who has given her an OUNCE of respect has asked her to essentially die for him by acting as his decoy. As Maria mentions in AC Bloodlines, by this point, she is also a step away from becoming a knight – and at this point, she’s also known as a woman among the Templars. And yet, she believes they have become her family, and she is willing to die for their cause and for Robert. When Altaïr spares her and kills Robert, he’s sentencing her to the life she ran away from and feared – being nothing more than a woman who is looked down upon with condescending snarls and disgust for who she is.

This is why when we meet Maria in AC Bloodlines, she is rightfully PISSED. We literally see her realize that any ounce of respect and power she had is completely gone because Altaïr spared her. She is so pissed, in fact, that she tries to kill Altaïr again. This is even funnier when you remember how much of a BITCH it was to fight her in AC1, but I digress. Altaïr has destroyed everything she has built in her life for the last eight years. He has taken her home, her mentors, her family, and her honor. And bro doesn’t have a clue in the fucking world.

It’s at this point that I’ll also analyze more about Maria’s relationship with the Templars. At first glance, yes, she was a Templar and believed in their cause. Really, though, it goes far deeper than that. It’s not necessarily that Maria believes in their cause – otherwise, it would’ve taken a lot more for Altaïr to sway her to the Assassins – but that she believes in the people. Again, from Maria’s perspective, the Templars (especially Robert) were the ONLY people in her entire life to treat her with dignity, and she is willing to die for them. She is willing to throw her honor to the ground and beg for forgiveness in front of Bouchard because, without the Templars, she is nothing. She is back to square one as a silly little girl trying to run from a life that would only subjugate her. It’s that recurring characteristic of undying loyalty to those who have given her the life she has always wanted.

And for Maria, it is immediately spat back in her face.

When Bouchard takes over in AC Bloodlines, he is a strict Templar Grandmaster. No consorting with women, periodt. And he flaunts this over Maria, taunting her. He is tearing the last ounce of respect she’d ever received and throwing it away. Every sacrifice she made for the Templars for the last eight years meant nothing, and it is crushing to her. She continues to be pissed off at Altaïr, who mentions that she’s more pissed at the Templars than at him. Once again, she is nothing more than a woman – an imprisoned one at that.

This is where one of my favorite Maria scenes (not that there’s many) comes into play. When she and Altaïr are sitting on the ship to Cyprus or wherever it doesn’t matter, Altaïr does something that no person has done for her before: he treats her with unconditional respect. As funny as his autistic ramble about Empedocles and philosophy is, there are so many assumptions that go into Altaïr’s conversation that I think help sway Maria to his side. When he talks to Maria, he speaks to her as an equal. He talks to her about philosophy because of course she would know about philosophy in his mind – to him, she is a soldier and a person first, and a woman second (shut the fuck about The Secret Crusade and him thinking about her as a lioness shut up shut up I low key hate it even though it’s funny). He is the first person in her life to speak to her as an equal and with respect with no strings attached. In fact, when Maria taunts him for leaving her cuffed even as he talks about free will, he lets her go. She may not like him at this point, but after this scene, you can certainly see that she respects him in how she speaks to him. BONUS: she’s not trying to outright kill him anymore! Hooray!

You can see the impact Altaïr and his conversation had on Maria when she confronts Shahar in her courtesan fit. There’s so many layers to Maria willingly dressing in such an exposing, vulnerable, and feminine way (keep in mind this bitch is Catholic, I know her guilt was going crazy), but what I’m going to focus on is her conversation with Shahar. When he speaks to her, he is gross and all but catcalling her, calling her a “little fox” and using a sultry tone. Maria is having NONE of it, and one can only assume this is a tone she has dealt with a thousand times over. This is also where we see the gears turning in Maria’s head. I’ve seen people criticize Maria for how quickly she flip-flopped, but I think that’s overlooking the reason that she WAS a Templar – they were the only people who provided her a home when she had none. If you’re desperate for anyone to treat you with an iota of respect, you’d do whatever they ask. After she talks to Altaïr though, and especially after realizing Robert was simply manipulating her, she is questioning the Templars’ ideologies and realizing this is not what she wants. It low key is like Alicent in House of the Dragons right now – she’s shocked that fighting against women fucked herself over. Maria is similar in that sense – she thought that by being what the Templars wanted and fighting for what they believed, it wouldn’t come back to bite her in the ass. But it did. She’s a woman before she’s a Templar, and the ideology of the Templars would see her subjugated just as she was before. It isn’t until after Altaïr’s spiel about free will and the challenges it brings that she realizes she has other options.

And that’s ultimately what brings Maria to the side of the Assassins – realizing her errors in thinking and wanting a way to redeem herself. The Assassins are her second chance, which is ironic given how many stories after hers would follow this same format of second chances. But it isn’t just the ideology change, either. It’s Altaïr. No, she does not have undying loyalty by the end of AC Bloodlines, but he’s certainly earned her trust and respect. He’s treated her like any other person without ever holding power or loyalty over her head. He does not manipulate her or exploit her – he respects her, and he earnestly tells her of the creed’s ideologies not to lure her in, but because he genuinely believes in the idea of dispelling the illusions of the world and wants to share it with her, whether she becomes an Assassin or not. That is what turns Maria into an Assassin at the end of the day: his respect for her and his understanding of the creed. And despite their issues, Maria chooses to follow him to the ends of the earth.

Now we’re at a really funny part of Maria’s story: we know basically NOTHING about what happens in between AC Bloodlines and AC Reflections. We know that sometime after traveling to Masyaf, Maria and Altaïr became a couple. We know they married in 1195 and gave birth to Darim the same year. Two years later, they would traumatize Desmond Miles by fucking on top of a castle, which is so fucking funny and only supports my characterization of Maria as a gremlin, because who the fuck else would make their husband climb up a giant ass tower for sex? We know she officially became an Assassin and would beg Altaïr to stop looking into the Apple. We know she would join Altaïr and Darim to Mongolia to kill Genghis Khan. And that is all we know for an approximately 30-YEAR PERIOD.

While there’s a lot I could talk about in that gap, like Maria’s relationship with other Assassins, I’m going to focus on her relationship with motherhood. As we established earlier, Maria had ZERO interest in being a mother or giving birth. This is a personal headcanon but I do not care because it’s MY analysis and I can do as I please, but I feel like she would’ve dreaded childbirth, especially given how English nobility acted about it (e.g., how people treated it like a scandal or disease) and how it was the leading cause of death for women until the 20th century. Yet, despite this, she had not one, but TWO children. She was like one away from the goal, and even then Sef had two daughters so really she fulfilled it. But why? What changed that she would be willing to do the very thing she left England to avoid?

I think it goes back to the reason she was disinterested in it in the first place. Like Maria says in The Secret Crusade, she didn’t want to just be a mother or a wife. Her ideal husband would treat her like any other man, taking her hunting or whatever else bullshit medieval stuff they’d do instead of scrolling through TikTok. She never said she didn’t want to be a mother. I think her hesitance stems from the fact that she didn’t want to SOLELY be defined as a mother or a wife. With Altaïr, however, that fear is pretty much gone. Since the moment she met him, Altaïr has always treated her with respect and admired the things she was once shamed for. Her strength is valuable as an Assassin. Her bluntness keeps him in check. Her ideas are admired rather than ridiculed. To Altaïr, Maria is not just a woman or even just an Assassin. She’s a person with her own experiences and ideas and fears and strengths and dreams. He loves her for every aspect of herself that was once frowned upon.

I remember a while ago seeing a Tumblr post from ye olden days (like 2012) talking about how because menstrual cycles were extremely irregular back in the day due to medieval diets and exercise, Maria would have to purposefully chill out to regulate her cycle to become pregnant. What that implies is that she trusted Altaïr so much that she was willing to settle down and have children because she knew it would not influence how he treated or loved her. Personally, I think this is true of Darim, but that Sef was an accident because it’s funnier that way, but regardless, the point still stands. Maria getting pregnant and becoming a mother is the opposite of what she thought she would ever want, but because she loved and trusted Altaïr so much, she was willing to have a family with him because she knew it would not come to define her. I think that is unbelievably sweet.

We also don’t really see Maria interact with her children very often, which I think is a fucking shame. When she does interact with Darim (we never see her with Sef, though we do see her reaction to his death), Maria is always supportive and encouraging. Again, this is more my headcanon territory but I really don’t care because I can do what I fucking please, but Maria low key feels like a boy mom to me, but not in the weird Freud way, lmfao. Like we established earlier, Maria’s key trait is her loyalty. I think this loyalty would be extended to her children. We know she’s loyal to Altaïr (it ends up killing her), but I feel like it would go insane with her children. When she learns of Sef’s death in The Secret Crusade, this woman breaks down in tears instantly. WHERE THE FUCK WAS THE MOTHERLY RAGE WITH ABBAS, UBISOFT. WHERE WAS IT. Anyways.

Masyaf is a pretty cutthroat environment to raise a child, especially when you consider that Abbas is apparently lurking in the background scheming during Altaïr’s reign. Something I wish we learned more about (and something I just find fascinating in general) is the political environment of Masyaf. Altaïr implemented a lot of changes to the Brotherhood that faced backlash, one of the key ones being allowing women in the order again (ahem, Maria). I know Maria said she was uninterested in the politics of running a house, but I do think she’d kind of have to play her hand in politics in Masyaf, kind of how Altaïr realizes he’s not exempt from politics since he’s literally shaping them. If Maria wants her kids to be safe, especially as sons of the Master of the Assassins, she’s gotta play her cards well. This is why I think it does make sense for Maria to calm down after having children to be more similar to the Maria we see in AC Reflections and AC Revelations. She can’t just fight everyone like she did when she was relying solely on herself. Now, she has people relying on her, and I think it makes sense for her character to chill out more (though without losing her spunk) to ensure her family is safe.

For those that have ever watched Magnificent Century, basically think about how Hurrem went from fighting everyone to playing her cards wisely so her kids wouldn’t die or do stupid shit. That’s how I feel like Maria would be.

Something else that’s interesting about Maria to me is her relationship with Altaïr. Duh, you’re probably saying, but hear me out. We know that while she and Altaïr were inseparable during their marriage, there was one thing that strained it: the Apple. It makes sense why Maria would be so pissed off at it. She’s seen Altaïr control men’s minds with it. She’s seen how it takes him away for days at a time with its secrets, to the point she is begging him to throw it away. Back to the point about loyalty to her family, whereas Altaïr seeks knowledge, Maria just wants her family protected and safe because she loves them – including her dumbass husband. It’s ironic that the very thing she fought about with Altaïr is the thing that killed her.

So we’re finally at AC Revelations, and I am truly shocked that you’re still here. Kudos to you. At that final confrontation scene with Abbas, that loyalty for those she loves comes to a head. When Altaïr whips out the Apple, Maria begs and pleads him to stop, because she knows if he uses the Apple to control someone, he will only be proving Abbas’s point, which will only fuck them over. In The Secret Crusade, we also have Malik’s head on top of this scene to make it worse. Maria’s position is again one of desperation. Her son is dead, one of her best friends is now just a head, and her husband is about to go sicko mode. She is screwed and she knows it. What she doesn’t know is that she’s about to be stabbed by Swami (I’m going with the revelations version shut up) in a last ditch effort to stop Altaïr from using the Apple. Altaïr doesn’t listen to Maria, and it kills her. He kills her.

… SO I HAVE THOUGHTS.

I think Maria dying from the Apple makes sense, I do. That’s not my problem. My problem is how AC Revelations basically dumbed her down to this motherly, homely figure which is the like, ANTITHESIS of what Maria is. Where was the feminine rage??? You’re telling me this woman would not be about to SLAUGHTER someone after learning that Sef died?? You’re telling me she would just pull an AltaïR thiS iSn’T yOu???????? Are you so fucking for real right now??? It pisses me off because it nukes her character. While yes, it makes sense for her to be a much calmer woman and 67 compared to 30, this is still Maria. Don’t act like she and Altaïr don’t have fucking anger issues and be so fucking for real.

Here’s my ideal scenario for what should’ve gone down. I think once they pulled Malik’s head out, there should’ve been all-out chaos rather than this bullshit “We killed everyone loyal to Altaïr before he arrived.” Maria should’ve been right there with them with a sword out. Altaïr, in a desperate attempt to calm everyone down, would take out the Apple and try to control everyone. If you’ve seen the long ass discussion about how Revelations fucked up Altaïr’s character arc, this also helps remedy that because Altaïr is pulling out because of his arrogance in believing he can control the Apple. News flash: he can’t. Maria, while fighting for Altaïr, would somehow be killed either by the Apple or like similar to how Swami accidentally killed her. Something along those lines where it is Altaïr’s fault. That’s how she should’ve gone out, not some weird pick me bullshit.

Anyways. RIP Maria Thorpe you would’ve loved Crusader Kings 3.

I definitely missed some points about her character but this is already 7 pages long on Google docs so I am NOT writing anymore. God bless.

TLDR she's a baddie and I need her so so so bad

[shinesurge]

oh shit hey i just twigged that a new book coming out soon might necessitate a reminder that kc's Various Funding Efforts have a book club tier (essentially: you get anything i send to print while you're supporting). If you want to start supporting OR upgrade to get on the list for that in time for Volume 4 coming out you should do that in like. The next week or so lmfao

Volume 4 is also gonna be the first print book with a supporter credits page, so if you wanna get in on THAT now is also the time to get your $2 donation set up. Additionally: I have lowered that perk to 2 dollars because, as I am fond of saying, literally everything helps so I would like to credit everybody. If you don't remember me talking about this at all it's because I announced it in the newsletter back in February when I didn't think I was printing anything this year. I'll elaborate on the logistics a bit later, but I figure if that's something you really want you know it already, so get while the gettin's good.

You can read up on how to help Kidd Commander keep getting made on the site's support page, which is also a good place to subscribe to the newsletter so you can keep up with where we're at financially. The newsletters ARE publicly archived and you can see all of them here.

I get asked about it a lot so while we're at this: as far as it goes I've sort of been trying to encourage the Ko-fi or Paypal instead of Patreon since they don't skim so much off the top, it's probably not such a big deal for other creators but if we're gonna make that December deadline every dollar counts haha. Whatever works for you works for me tho, and all the rewards are exactly the same on all the platforms so follow ur heart. Thanks!!

[izvmimi]

ok it's hard for me to come up with lore things specifically since i'm just before the time skip and tend to like to wait until i'm basically done with the source material but the basic beats i have for my self-insert currently are the following:

i join the straw hats a little before the events of water 7 and am immediately overwhelmed by what the fuck i get involved in because i went from 'hey can you be our doctor spare and share tips with chopper who also is from drum island where you grew up'

i mostly have the biggest issue with the fact that these people i just joined are fighting the world government knowing what just wapol was able to do to drum island but clearly i have no power in this situation

anyway luffy and i get separated from the group but together during the sabaody arc and end up on the island of women

before we get separated together i did not have any feelings however i saw hancock and suddenly i had feelings LMFAO

but ofc those feelings were not like well elaborated by the time luffy decides he's going to break into impel down, but i'm very resistant to him going for obvious reasons, but he ends up leaving and we sort of argue but secretly i've understood his feelings

he promises to bring ace back the way, super cheerful and confident as he is

he does not bring ace back with him, he barely brings his own self back or at least the old him back

lots of emotional labor happens but then about a year or so after that there's sort of a quiet confession, but it's sort of the kind of thing that doesn't need to be said because there's clearly something more happening by the second year of the timeskip

by the time the remainder of the crew shows up we're very visibly a couple, albeit an odd one (nami is VERY emotionally distressed by this)

and that's the basic stuff so far -

...

additional self-insert related backstory:

parents were doctors who were exiled around wapol's era - also did medical research on the side related to devil fruits but not anywhere on the scale of vegapunk's work

dad got involved in some loan shark stuff in exchange for getting his research out of drum island through an official which then ended up with him getting killed and later mom and me ending up in trafficking

part of the gang trafficking involves being force-fed a devil fruit that allows me to smuggle items. eventually stuff happens and i meet nami and we do have a thieving moment for like a couple months and then we part ways, but then at some point i free myself by doing something kind of terrible and ruining away

at some point get taken in by a doctor who teaches me because i'm from drum, and i work as her apprentice and she teaches me a technique for scanning that is a form of soft haki

chopper and i work super closely while on the ship and are each other's backup system!

[envyenvys]

svsss | one-shot | T | 2.5k | ao3

sequel to this

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#general

passionate ranting

transmigration is real and yet somehow the biggest impact it’s had on my life is that I’m now lowkey terrified of crossing the street

homoerotic undertones

are you good?

passionate ranting

no!!! what if I get fucking isekaid on my way to work!!!

homoerotic undertones

then you won’t have to work anymore..?

lmfao what kinda question

dick jokes

what’s going on?

homoerotic undertones

pash’s afraid of getting isekaid

passionate ranting

it’s a perfectly legitimate fear!!!

what if I end up in pidw and have to watch pc & lbh sucking face all the time??

homoerotic undertones

wait you’ve got a point hold on

should I be worried abt getting transmigrated? bc now I’m worried

dick jokes

there’s no way it’s common enough to be an actual issue

you’re more likely to just straight up die

homoerotic undertones

comforting

passionate ranting

forgot that was an option for a sec

why did that actually help. genuinely not even stressed anymore, thanks dj

dick jokes

that’s what I’m here for

homoerotic undertones

speechless.

passionate ranting

gonna go get groceries now that I’m not stressed out of my mind ✌️ ttyl

homoerotic undertones

ttyl…………

dick jokes

you were putting off groceries bc of this??

┌ dick jokes you’re more likely to just strai…

binghe obsession

of course, there’s always the possibility that everyone who dies gets transmigrated somewhere, and we only know about pc and airplane because they came back

homoerotic undertones

what the fuck

dick jokes

I think you just reinvented the concept of heaven

homoerotic undertones

I NEED you to stop talking right now

binghe obsession

no bc that would be a lot of people all going to the same place

also, hm

I was going to try to argue it doesn’t count as isekai/transmigration/etc but the more I think about it the more it does…

homoerotic undertones

please I’m begging you

dick jokes

this is why we need to stop doubting me

it’s all “dj that’s ridiculous” until I’m proven right 10 minutes later

homoerotic undertones

can you maybe stop speaking the most cursed things into existence then??

dick jokes

no

homoerotic undertones

then I will continue to doubt you

┌ homoerotic undertones can you maybe stop sp…

binghe obsession

and which one of us started the whole transmigration theory in the first place?

homoerotic undertones

I SAID I WAS SORRY

dick jokes

it’s fine they’ll just be coming back as a cockroach in the next life

or I guess ming fan, based on how this is going

homoerotic undertones

do you hate me be honest

binghe obsession

@ passionate ranting hurry up we just got the opportunity to make the funniest poll ever

homoerotic undertones

HEY??

dick jokes

LMAO

#photos

passionate ranting

just found my future wife

[candid photo of an elegantly dressed person with long, dark hair studiously examining a crate of watermelons.]

homoerotic undertones

oh hey you’re back

binghe obsession

here we go again

passionate ranting

this is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, if she smiled at me I’d ascend on the spot

homoerotic undertones

so does that mean you’re gonna actually try talking to this one or what

dick jokes

why tf is there a photo of pc in here and why is lbh not with him I’m scared

wait

passionate ranting

a photo of WHO

dick jokes

no fucking way

homoerotic undertones

oh my god

binghe obsession

HA

passionate ranting

no no no THIS CANT BE HAPPENING

dick jokes

LMFAOOOOO

📌 [binghe obsession pinned a message to this channel. See all pinned messages.]

passionate ranting

NOOOOOOOOO

DJ TAKE IT BACK

DJ ❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

dick jokes

[screenshot of a half-completed portrait of two people in elaborate xianxia style hanfu. One of them is clearly Luo Binghe, the other looks identical to the person in the previous photo.]

I mean I could but I would be lying

[binghe obsession sent a voice memo.]

[Transcription: 12 seconds of loud, breathless laughter.]

passionate ranting

do you hate me be honest!!!

homoerotic undertones

I just used that one like 5 min ago

passionate ranting

FUCK

this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me

ykw. fuck it

dick jokes

?

homoerotic undertones

fuck what

dick jokes

pash?

homoerotic undertones

@ passionate ranting fuck what???

binghe obsession

we’ll find out eventually

homoerotic undertones

that’s what I’m afraid of

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#general

passionate ranting

@ dick jokes guess who just learned your government name

dick jokes

what the fuck

how????

passionate ranting

😇.

binghe obsession

you’re a little too chipper for someone who just got terminally humiliated a little over an hour ago

what are you up to

passionate ranting

who says I’m up to anything? rude

dick jokes

oh you’re definitely up to smth

passionate ranting

aren’t you late for work

dick jokes

shit

wait how did you know that

binghe obsession

you told us yesterday

dick jokes

ah

binghe obsession

dumbass

dick jokes

thanks

okay I’m off. don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone

binghe obsession

you know they will

passionate ranting

“they”

glass houses, bestie

you’ve been one of us for way too long to pretend you’re the only normal one here

#shit_happens

homoerotic undertones

guess whose apartment just got flooded ✌️

binghe obsession

the emoji is a choice

homoerotic undertones

I’m channeling pash

thought the laidback optimistic attitude would help combat the stress of the situation but honestly it’s not doing much!

passionate ranting

can confirm, it doesn’t actually help <3

also what the hell!!

aren’t you on the third floor??

homoerotic undertones

you’d think I’d be safe from water damage up here but no. some idiot on the floor above me lit their apartment on fire and decided the best way to make it not on fire anymore was by dumping gallons of water all over everything

and wouldn’t you know it! the floors and ceilings in this building are not!! watertight!!!

so now all my shit is ruined and I don’t have an apartment anymore 👍

passionate ranting

what the fuck

??????

homoerotic undertones

I’m having such a good time right now 👍👍👍

binghe obsession

I’ll see if I can clear out some space for you here

the couch sucks, but it should be fine until you find a new place

passionate ranting

I’d have you stay with me but my apartment is female-only :(

wait B don’t you have that nightmare roommate…

binghe obsession

ugh don’t remind me

homoerotic undertones

honestly I’ll take it

nightmare roommate is better than any of my other options atm

passionate ranting

low bar

is there anything you need to replace? I can bring you a few things on my way back from work tomorrow

homoerotic undertones

you guys are gonna make me cry wtf. thank you

I’m still making a list but I’ll lyk

dick jokes

holy shit under are you okay??

dw abt B’s shitty roommate, you can stay with me

homoerotic undertones

??

passionate ranting

aren’t you sharing a 1b with your own shitty roommate?

dick jokes

no they’re moving out

lbh wants me to do more portraits of him and pc, I think it’s some kind of kink thing idk I didn’t ask

binghe obsession

yeah I wouldn’t

dick jokes

anyway I was thinking of moving somewhere nicer since I have the money for it now & if under needs a new place too we might as well just find one together

you might have to stay with B for a few days but my roommate’s almost done packing, they should be gone by the end of the week

homoerotic undertones

what the fuck

passionate ranting

and when were you planning on telling us this???

dick jokes

idk it just never came up

I was planning on visiting a few places tomorrow if you’re free?

homoerotic undertones

I. yeah. yeah, okay

fuck it, why not. let’s move in together

dick jokes

cool, I’ll dm you the details

okay gotta go my break is over

passionate ranting

this is so

binghe obsession

lmk if you still need my couch. lmfao

DMs between pash (passionate ranting) and shizunshusband

pash

I’d like to apologize again for the incident at the grocery store

your husband is objectively beautiful but I wasn’t trying to flirt with him I promise, I just recognized him and wanted to say hi

also I’m a lesbian

shizunshusband

So you’ve said. Repeatedly.

pash

I’ll say it as many times as I need to, sir!

shizunshusband

Once is enough.

pash

okay

shizunshusband

You said you recognized shizun. From where? This lord was under the impression his husband looked different when he lived in this world.

pash

oh uh

there’s sort of two parts to that

so like, I don’t know what he looked like before, but I’m friends with the artist doing your portrait so I know what he looks like now

but I used to follow him online before he transmigrated, so I kind of know him? we talked a few times but we weren’t exactly friends or anything

shizunshusband

I see.

Shizun was well known in his past life, then.

pash

yeah he was pretty popular, especially in the

um

you know about proud immortal demon way… right?

shizunshusband

Yes, this lord is aware.

pash

thank god lol

anyway yeah everyone in the pidw fandom knows who he is

I used his analysis to get the details right in my fanfics a few times

shizunshusband

What are “fanfics”?

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#good_news

passionate ranting

finally got commissioned again!!! things are looking up

binghe obsession

now all you need is a girlfriend

passionate ranting

fuck off

homoerotic undertones

congrats pash!!

passionate ranting

ty!!

this is gonna be my magnum opus, I can feel it

homoerotic undertones

what was the comm for anyway?

passionate ranting

it’s a secret 😇

homoerotic undertones

yk normally I wouldn’t think anything of it but the timing is suspicious

what are you up to

passionate ranting

you’re the third person to ask me that wtf

god forbid women do anything

binghe obsession

you walked right into that one

homoerotic undertones

forget I asked

Texts between Shen Yuan and Shang Li

Shen Yuan

why does binghe know what fanfic is

answer me

Shang Li

I don’t know!!! it wasn’t me this time I swear!!!

Shen Yuan

who tf else would he be talking to!!!!

Shang Li

idk!!!

the artist maybe??

Shen Yuan

no the artist is terrified of him, they don’t talk

Shang Li

and you’re just fine with that

Shen Yuan

I’m not gonna force binghe to interact with people who don’t like him!

they’re doing just fine. if something goes wrong I’ll intervene

Shang Li

…

wait didn’t you run into one of the artist’s friends earlier

Shen Yuan

we haven’t been talking to her either, though?

she tried to give me her discord username but binghe took it. thankfully she didn’t try to add me on weibo

Shang Li

hmm

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#general

binghe obsession

so how’s the apartment hunt going. lmfao

homoerotic undertones

it’s going great, actually!

we’ve already narrowed it down to a few places, the process has been surprisingly smooth

binghe obsession

oh I’m sure

dick jokes

don’t listen to them, under’s just easy to please

homoerotic undertones

it’s not like we need a lot of space!!

2bs with a nice view are super easy to find when you have an unlimited budget

dick jokes

and a dishwasher

there’s no reason either of us has to live that way anymore

homoerotic undertones

and a dishwasher, right

you’re so good to me <3

binghe obsession

do you two hear yourselves

homoerotic undertones

?

DMs between dj (dick jokes) and eatingtangyuan (binghe obsession)

dj

do NOT fucking blow this for me

eatingtangyuan

LMFAO

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#general

→  a wild airplane shooting towards the sky appeared.

homoerotic undertones

DJ WHAT THE FUCK

dick jokes

IT WASNT ME

binghe obsession

who else could it possibly have been

passionate ranting

no they’re right. it was me

I trust you’ll keep your end of the bargain, mr plane

airplane shooting towards the sky

ya ofc, this is fucking hilarious

you know ning yingying isn’t gonna fuck you though right

passionate ranting

that’s what they said about pc, but look at him now

┌ passionate ranting would you read the peerles…

airplane shooting towards the sky

hey can you make this again real quick

for no particular reason

passionate ranting

yeah for sure hold on a sec ✌️

[passionate ranting created a poll.]

would you read the peerless cucumber transmigration romance?

☐ yes I need to know how his brain works [20%]

☐ fuck no he’d be insufferable [80%]

5 votes • 23h left

passionate ranting

wow

homoerotic undertones

brutal

dick jokes

no I get it

┌ passionate ranting that’s what they said a…

binghe obsession

hey quick question. what did you mean by this

not to ruin the vibe or anything

passionate ranting

dw this is less isekai and more portal fantasy

the only truck running me over is airplane’s giant ass husband

in like a neutral non-sexual way. he’s very tall and intimidating and the whole demon thing is hard to wrap my head around

airplane shooting towards the sky

nice save

passionate ranting

why does this keep happening to me

Texts between Shen Yuan and Shang Li

Shang Li

yk if you think about it you’re technically the protagonist of a villainess transmigration novel

Shen Yuan

there are easier ways to die, but if you insist

Shang Li

haha!! just kidding!!

also do you think nyy likes pathetic women or is she more into the buff & capable type

Shen Yuan

?

yingying’s straight

Shang Li

bro

parallel lines by pashwritesfic

傲仙魔途 | Proud Immortal Demon Way - Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky

Rated E

Luo Binghe/Shen Qingqiu

Tags: slow burn, enemies to lovers, horror elements, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, qi deviation, airplane shooting towards the sky’s plot devices

Summary:

“Now, little beast,” Shizun snapped, flicking his fan out to cover the bottom of his face.

Luo Binghe stopped hesitating and prepared the tea. The last time he did this, his attempt was so poor that Shizun dumped the whole cup over his head rather than be forced to drink it. He’d practiced since then, sneaking into the kitchens at night so he would never be humiliated like that again.

The tea he served his shizun this time was fragrant, perfectly steeped. As Shizun brought the cup to his lips, Luo Binghe braced himself for his reaction. He expected dismissive words, a cruel sneer, even to be right back where he started with scalding tea dripping onto his robes.

He didn’t expect Shizun to smile.

Or: there’s something wrong with Shen Qingqiu, and Luo Binghe is the only one who’s noticed.

HE TRANSMIGRATED 🥒

#general

passionate ranting

just posted my new fic ✨

[link]

homoerotic undertones

your comm was for lbh/sqq?

you really found your niche huh

passionate ranting

I mean, I guess you could say that lol

homoerotic undertones

?

airplane shooting towards the sky

oh hey congrats!

wait what is this

passionate ranting

thanks bestie!! don’t worry about it

do you think this technically counts as rpf now

airplane shooting towards the sky

please don’t ask me that

———

Notes: the “li” I’ve chosen for sqh’s birth name is 栗 meaning “chestnut” or “cold”, I figured it could sound like a (hopefully) normal name while also referencing lbh being sort of a self insert

[blackstarchanx3new]

FSR rambles 19 traumatic things Link experianced

Pet him like a cat shadow.

At least Link's normal enough to get up now.

Awkward...

Shadow's like "Damn this is weird"

Link's selectively mute still but I'd struggle to talk with four dipshits screaming like cracked out squirrels in my head too so ya know, I don't even blame him for being shitty at communication with Shadow rn.

He's got his priorities in order: FOOD.

Okay but you know Link is mad his plan failed literally the day after he employed it.

I'd be pissed anyway XDDDD

The four of em fell asleep, wake back up and they're right back to square one, ground zero the shit storm he tried to escape from.

That's horrifying in a way I can't quite articulate. "Hopelessness" is the only word coming to mind. Like, everything he did, it didn't matter. It was all for nothing they're BACK to how they were.

His hopes that pulling the sword would fix it: Crushed.

The literal only difference is that Shadow's here.

Which, is BETTER but damn if the disappointment from Link isn't palpable. You can only imagine what's going through his head rn after all this shit, he's just defaulting to a LITTLE BIT of normalcy in making breakfast.

Shadow's back to defaulting to doing: well nothing.

He isn't helping Link and is just WATCHING. Smth literally just yesterday was ALL HE COULD DO.

They're both just defaulting to what they're used to because this shit is too weird.

Is nice of Link to make enough for Shadow though. XD

Haha okay I can get into this:

Literally Shadow and Link simultaneously know each other and don't.

In cannon: Shadow said ONE SENTANCE TO THIS MAN. A SINGLE THING. AND IT WAS MOCKING HIM LMFAO.

Yes Shadow had interaction with the colors but Link and Shadow: Nothing.

So of course he feels awkward around him.

They spent forever together and yet still feel so far away.

It's a tough situation.

Link pulling out the "you sure are quiet" is imo, him trying to be funny.

he continues with "thought you'd be more comfortable with me...at least considering how many times we've kissed"

Obviously this is in reference to Vio lmfao (...Also green but uh we'll get into that later). With Link's eyes matching Vio's.

Link is completely fucking with him and it's funny to me at least. Like he's so deadpan but he's being such a goof rn.

Though it is interesting to note how Link directly says Vio is him without any separation here. Since Vio also thought he was Link last night.

WHY WOULDN'T HE REMEMBER SMOOCHING YA SHADOW???

Shadow clearly not knowing HOW Link works is kinda hilarious but also, nobody knows how this works.

Link casually referencing what Vio said in the fire temple, it's much more obvious now he's goofing with Shadow rn.

Shadow realizing the obvious, that Link IS the same person he's been hanging around just mashed together is a small but good reminder. Like link isn't a stranger fully. He's still the four of them.

Shadow just asking "Is this for me" would seem weird but uhh remember:

He didn't have a BED. He's been a SHADOW for YEARS. Like. Shadow being neglected isn't new. So it's a sad notion but he is shocked he'd be given food.

Link kinda having a "Wtf u mean? duh it's for you." moment.

Also the bomb drop that Link knows about Dark Link...Oops.

Exactly what relationship/how he KNOWS about Dark is kinda, left open since he doesn't elaborate what so ever...

It can be assumed he just knows what everyone else does. Buuut. There's always that "but"

"Link what are you blabbing for they can hear you" - Shadow continuing to not understand how Link works. XD

I don't think it was mentioned anywhere before this but haha Blue was also in on the splitting Link plan. Vio and Red are the only ones left out of some of the loop it seems...But they were mainly worried about Vio catching on.

Link accuratly noting this nightmare isn't anything like the first time. Sorry buddy it's cause you're in an unrated comic by a weirdo fan vs any official Zelda comic. XDDD Which wouldn't allow 90% of what's in this comic I'm sure haha.

Also reasonable train of thought thought Shadow buddy about reverting back into a shadow. What a terrifying thought.

Aw Link's being sweet and- TRIFORCE

Yeah Shadow's sweating bullets considering uh the little fact Ganon said "Here catch, you're evil triforce of power man now"

Takes Link a second to remember back on that convo Shadow and Vio had about the triforce in the flashbacks. PG 179-182 ish if you're curious on brushing up on that.

Oh hi Vio.

I don't think a lot of people caught that this was Vio's design from FS. Which is why Shadow was SO DISTURBED to see him like that. Link's very all over the place mentally and it's showing with his appearance. He's unstable as all hell right now.

Blue chiming in with "Wait a damn minute" remembering Zelda ALSO has the Triforce on her hand.

Vio and Red are being obtuse/ignorant while Blue and Green know smth's up and are getting pissy about it.

Which just makes Link: All over the damn spectrum of emotion about this right now haha.

I'd get tonal whiplash too Shadow.

Link going down the list of things he thought Shadow would want haha.

and Shadow's gay lil confession that all he really wants is Link is sweet.

I mean what else does he have to strive for? He gave up on a lot of his old dreams as pointless after becoming apart of the endless cycle of hatred.

It's noteworthy that Link's outfit glitches to black again.

The line "Which you" was a very fun one to come up with. Because it just, hits ya.

Link isn't one entity. He's multiple. And he literally can't tell who Shadow's talking to in that moment. Because the underlying assumption (To Link and this will become obvious) is that Shadow really only cares about Vio.

All of last night is probably a complete blur/emotional whiplash around Shadow For Link.

Shadow threw a sword at Blue and was VERY hostile, was ALL OVER THE PLACE emotionally with Green mostly being bitter as hell, didn't really acknowledge red and Vio had a complete meltdown over his guilt surrounding Shadow and their friendship and relationship as a whole was all over the place.

Cram that all back together and what is Link supposed to take away from all that. Overall dude had a net negative experience with Shadow and now he's telling him he wants him?

I'd be confused as hell too.

Hi Zelda.

Safe to say that was inevitable given how badly Link was bugging out this entire time.

He couldn't handle seeing Zelda haha.

I don't think people caught Vio is just in his "headspace" outfit. Except it isn't pastel color palette.

Panic attack, featuring Blue. He was the most vocally insistent they draw the sword, was activly trying to force his way out of Link's mish mash body during that whole ordeal. The main take away is that: He HATES being In Link and that was just about the worst nightmare come to life for him.

He doesn't even want Red to touch him, which considering the way it's all but stated Link's magical body is just their bodies pressed together into one form makes the angle that they're all LITERALLY touching each other that much more...ehhh disturbing.

It's okay guys he just needs a minute alone-

Hah. Everyone's leaving you Vio. Doesn't press on the ol anxieties or anything.

Doesn't make it easy for a certain someone to come visit you.

Vio's insecurities focusing around being ALONE and himself are smth that's been fun.

He mainly wants to be Link out of pure selfishness and self hatred. Link is an escape from his own accountability, a way for him to keep himself in check. While Blue finds it to be an outright prison.

Everything Dark is saying about here Vio could also be applied to himself and even Dark says that. He looks miserable while saying it too since Vio's problems are starting to hit a lot closer to home.

At least we got Shadow to yank Vio out of his funk. But Dark has no one to do that for him.

Shadow petting Vio's face here while in a headlock is just, funny to me. Shadow can't affection properly at all lmfao.

But hey he knows when our lil buddy is active. Oops.

Oh the fun they have together alright. 😏

It'll be a real wet and fun time-

What the hell Dark is talking about is left pretty open for now.

But he is getting sick of just sad reactions to what he says.

He's nervous when faced with women. Same bro.

Green and Shadow begging for help on wtf to do with their new squid monster is pretty hilarious to me.

Vio's being perceptive.

"IT IS!?" yeah red. And if you were an interesting character I'd write you doing things. :D

HAH. TRAUMA. DARK LINK RELATED TRAUMA.

Surely that won't bite us in the ass later or anything...

Vio's outfit is very covered up because he's emotionally closed off yada yads I've mentioned this before.

This hasn't been brought up in the comic but Green is afraid of tentacles lmfao so his fear at Dark rn is warranted.

Shadow blatantly not caring what Dark is doing rn because he's busy

Zelda notices right away that Dark defied vaati which must have been weird for her in real time hah.

Shadow's instant response to what to do with Dark is "Murder"

Nice to see you've grown so much shadow lmfao.

Notice how Link being around isn't even the thinly vailed excuse dude just doesn't like Dark Link lmfao. Most of what he said to Dark last night imo was pure projection and again: Not because he cared about Dark. But now he feels like they have an easy to to get rid of him via Zelda. Doesn't have to confront weird feelings if the guy is gone ooomf.

Zelda isn't outright apposed to getting rid of Dark Link but is like "Uhh...But what about link tho-"

Shadow noticed his hair change.

I'm sure he noticed earlier, it's right in his eye sight but background detail of him actually looking at it like "Wtf?"

Also fun pressure to put on Green when he's strung out to shit rn.

HI DARK LINK! :D

Uhhhhhh. Okay then.

So Green's got murder trauma.

He's also just sick of the responsibilities piling on him like a crushing weight.

There's smth to be said about how Dark isn't a murderer so, doesn't have blood around his feet haha visual metaphores haha.

So clarity: Link as a whole person murdered the people who killed his father. And Vio and Green were the ones who had main control in that moment.

Hope that clears some stuff up.

Dark finds this shit hilarious because he's sadistic but Green snaps out of the panic to realize THIS GUY IS DARK LINK.

The moment Green switches from his helpless attire into his current fit was very fun emotionally cause this was the first time someone had ANY amount of control when facing Dark Link. (Excluding Shadow I suppose, in terms of the colors anyway)

Green being a badass is just smth I enjoy and the "Oh shit moment" was very fun to watch people react to haha.

Dark was so excited when seeing Green acknowledge him.

It really goes to show all of his "Nyeh you're such a shitty person" talk is literally not even his own opinion when it comes to the four colors. He's literally just repeating their insecurities and nothing else. Those words have NO BITE to them because Dark doesn't even believe it.

He's so excited to see Green because Green's the ONLY PERSON Who's truly acknowledged him in the head space.

Dark being so overwhelmed with joy he vomits.

Dark really doesn't have a lot of emotional regulation emotionally or physically. Like. The idea here is he's just, so excited he literally physically cannot handle that shit haha. I made a shitpost about it once but it's kinda just, accurate. XD

Green's like "Wtf is wrong with you"

because this isn't ANYTHING he thought he'd be dealing with considering how Shadow was acting/talking about him lmfao.

He was expecting Shadow 2.0 and got...This guy.

Guy who apologizes when acting goofy as shit

Guy who is excited to see him overjoyed even...After utterly destroying him not 2 seconds ago.

Just. A silly. Goofy guy.

It is fun to have Dark switch IMEDIATELY to depressed as hell thinking about how he's been so alone.

I would really describe Dark's excitement here as pure mania. because at the root Dark is a depressed individual.

Dark gives no shits when faced with death.

No begging or pleading for his life just "idk do what you want to I don't care"

Which, Dark Link's lack of care for his own personal safety has been shown off before and will only be a continued trend.

At the end of the day it shows a clear lack of self respect or care for himself.

Dark doesn't value himself.

Green's mercy here is rooted in his own selfishness.

He doesn't WANT to kill Dark Link because he doesn't want to hurt people. Which him and Vio did.

Green is ALSO very exhausted. And what you get is two individuals who would typically be at each other's throats, who aren't interested in fighting each other because they're just so worn out. The drive just isn't there.

Which leads them to being able to actually talk to each other in a meaningful way. And I just find that interesting.

Under different circumstances, these two very well could have fought here. XD

[erenfox]

omg you like newteresa too? 😍😍

and newtrenda, that's a one i've only ever very rarely seen! what do you like about them/any headcanons? 👀

i actually hadnt thought about the concept of newteresa until i came across ur blog and ive been in love with that idea ever since lmao :D

about newtenda im so glad u asked :')

if newt had survived, he would have DEFINITELY bonded with brenda over their shared trauma of nearly turning into cranks. lemme elaborate.

so i have this hc to cope with newt and teresa's death wherein a couple of days after reaching the safe haven the teens sneak back to the last city for some reason where they find the bodies of newt and teresa. obviously it's heartbreaking for them, but they quickly realise that by some miracle both of them barely survived. so they took the two of them back to the haven and after long treatments they finally regained their consciousness and stuff.

now newt comes back almost perfectly fine and normal thanks to thomas nd the cure - but due to him getting slowly infected over the long period of time in tst and tdc, he didn't fully become... human, if that makes sense. he still has violent episodes and tendencies to act kinda rogue, almost as it he's still under the control of the flare. and this is something brenda relates to. although not in as severe condition as newt, she still sometimes gets violent tendencies about which only jorge knows.

so she notices newt showing visible signs of stress and uneasiness just like she did after getting cured, and talks to him about it. to divert his attention from the ingrowing panic she uses the method we use to cope with anxiety attacks (three things u can see and touch rn). it starts actually working for him by some goddang miracle (i trust too much in miracles lmfao 😭🙏) but he sometimes cannot control it, causing the majority of people to stay away from him.

but not brenda. she helps him slowly subdue the murderous tendencies and wild behaviours which come free with the crank package. AND THIS IS HOW THEY BOND AAAAA LMAOO.

u have brenda healing newt for something she didn't do, and he repays it by helping her cope with her episodes and nightmares about her brother. that's literally how they end up crushing for each other which is visible to the whole wide world but not them. OH AND ALSO i have this hc where newt regained all his memories back after he got healed, meaning he remembered his baby sister sonya/lizzy. and sonya/lizzy is definitely the greatest newtenda shipper in existence (maybe alongside minho who ships newt with everyone lmfao)

BUT u also have jorge in overprotective dad mode whenever he sees newt being a lil too close to brenda hehe 🤭

might add more hcs abt these two later but for now ig this much fine lol

[blkkizzat]

Do you have any tips for writing fanfics? Like I wanna make my own but I’m scared people aren’t gonna like them 😭 Also how do you usually end a story? I’ve written before for school and stuff but it’s just kinda hard when I come to the end of the story…😓

-🪼

hey 🪼 babes! sorry i wrote alot so it took a min lol. take with a grain of salt though as what works for me may not work for you!

writing tips:

so first off: write for yourself. i know it's been said a million times and a worn out cliche but to break it down a bit— i feel like if you like your fic than other people will too. that is to say, we are all in the same fandom and are dorks/nerds, and like similar things even outside the fandom. i know people have their preferences on content but if you write it for your particular tastes and preferences, i promise there's other people in the fandom that will share in that too.

also even though my adhd works against me, i at least try to be organized and i always make an outline for a fic.

its super helpful to break everything up into small pieces. because then you arent staring at a blank page expecting a story to materialize from thin air LOL.

heres some things to include in your outline.

set the scene/world. where are we? what time is it? what are we initially feeling? which all Setting these things up from jump hooks in a reader as they want to feel like like are immersing yourselves in the world. especially x reader stories. i feel like x reader is so much easier to write then for two seperate characters, because if all else fails you can always call on how you personally felt or would feel in a situation then elaborate on it.

characterization. don't be afraid to make your characters a bit unlikeable, highlight their faults as you do their good parts. ex. my plug!choso fic, reader is a bitch lmfao. she takes choso for granted even though she's the happiest with him. the thing is—she knows that and it starts to eat her up. if a character can have self awareness and grow, then they have more depth than a character written with no faults.

conflict/goal. whats the conflict or what are we working towards? like even for a short pwp for ex: the goal is cum without getting interrupted/walked-in on because we are in a public bathroom. then from there you can work backwards and think. okay so what conflicts/problems would arise? where is this bathroom? what time of day is it and how many people are around? is anyone waiting on us/did we leave others to run off/will they come looking for us? you can make a conflicts out of any of those. conflicts drive the story forward and help you reach your end as its your beacon for how you progress.

ending. your ending only needs to tie the immediate conflict up. there could be an overarching conflict but you dont need to solve everything in your story. ex, continuing from the previous, y'all could be in the bathroom fucking and although the immediate conflict concerns no one interrupting you, the overarching conflict is that you both have significant others already and have yet to break this affair off. of course a pwp so you arent going to dive deep and explain the aftermath or the breakups, etc, but you can leave the story on a cliffhanger and lead the audience to guess whats next.

other tips.

don't write linearly: that is you dont have to write your story in the order of beginning, middle and end. start from wherever you want. skip around. its easier to write out the parts you do know you want then connect it together. even if its just a random piece of dialogue thats a sentence you know you want 2 scenes later, just write it down. writing is a messy process, not neat at all. which leads into... just write: even if you arent sure if you liking the idea 100% just yet write it down! you cant get to the next idea if you are stuck on why the current idea you are thinking of isn't good enough. lol this is why i say i get to a point in the process where i hate everything because ill be stuck with these meh-ideas but i know i have to get them out to get to the good idea.

edit: i edit my fics until l its something im having fun with. if you like it on first go around then thats great but just saying that to say its better to rework it or come back later to it (move on to something else in the meantime) than to put out something you aren't happy with. if you are proud of something you did that will definitely be reflected in your fic!

meditate to tap into characters: idk if you meditate often but i like to try to visualize myself in the character's shoes. what am i feeling? physically or emotionally? are there any distractions? how would i react to this? it helps with conveying character emotion, motives and makes the scene be more immersive. but in at same note, you don't have to give everything. focus on the most important aspect or two and the audience imagination will fill in the rest. some of the best compliments ppl have given me is they felt like they were watching a movie reading my fic (ty y'all the best) and i feel like its because of the immersive aspects in my fics which i take from my own reactions/experience. this also circles back to the point of liking your writing. because if you can convey what you are feeling well enough that you personally feel it re-reading your work, others will too. I hope these tips helped! 💕

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Ben Appel

Published: Dec 26, 2023

In 2021, Harvard evolutionary biologist Carole Hooven stated on a television news program that there are “two sexes” and that “those sexes are designated by the kinds of gametes we produce.” She added that “understanding facts about biology doesn’t prevent us from treating people with respect” when it comes to “their gender identities and use [of] their preferred pronouns.” Afterward, a Harvard graduate student, in her official capacity as director of the Human Evolutionary Biology Department’s Diversity, Inclusion, and Belonging Task Force, tweeted that Hooven’s “dangerous” and “transphobic” remarks made the department unsafe for transgender people. The Graduate Student Union took out a petition against Hooven, and, since no one would agree to serve as her teaching assistant, she had to discontinue her popular lecture course. This past January, under duress, Hooven retired from her position at Harvard.

More recently, I heard Hooven speak at a conference in Denver. She talked about academic freedom and her dedication to creating a just society. She said something I believe: that the truth is the way toward true social justice, and that the truth is what ultimately alleviates human suffering. After Hooven left the stage, I tweeted my thoughts about what she said, concluding, “Yep, I’ll die on that hill.” A Twitter user, in a now-deleted series of replies, responded, “Wish you would then. And quickly.” Later, this person elaborated, “Cis white conservative gays can all d*e. Please do, no one likes you.”

This might be the first time I’ve been called “conservative” for voicing my support of the truth and social justice. Right-wing homophobia is nothing new, though the enmity for “cis white gays” like me from the other side of the aisle has sadly also become widespread online. Here’s a very small sampling:

“[C]is white gay men are the weakest links and idc who knows it.” — @ann_forcino.

“ur rave wasn't ‘100% queer joy’ it was a warehouse party full of white cis gay men who want to dance and fuck each other lmfao [...] “that's not queer joy, that's f^g joy.” — @Maxies_back

“Chelsea and Hells Kitchen, more so than other neighborhoods in New York, produce nothing better than prissy, entitled cis White Power pretentious gay men, who don't respect diversity, or the rule of law.” — “LGBT for Change”

“Maybe they were right all along and white cis gays really do go to hell.” — Jerry Falwell @obssdwmlp

“Behind every bad man there is an even worse cis gay white man.” — @ANIMETWTDNI

“We need to realize that gay cis white men are still cis white men.” — @pettypiedpipertake

“Maybe homophobia against cis white gay men is valid.” — @heartIwin

“Noah Schnapp is also evidence that gays will truly go to h£ll. especially a cis white upper class gay like i genuinely, genuinely mean that and i’m sorry if that comes off as problematic.” [Schnapp is a 19-year-old Jewish gay actor who has spoken out in support of Israel in the wake of the October 7 2023 terrorist attacks.] — @brat6z

 “I love it when white gays erase the trans and black side of this flag [...] You faggots deserve to get hatecrimed to death.” — @daredevilshill_

Writing for The Nation in 1994, the gay playwright Tony Kushner argued that homosexuality and socialism are intrinsically linked. Homosexuals, he wrote, “like most everyone else, are and will continue to be oppressed by the depredations of capital until some better way of living together can be arrived at.” Kushner lamented the growing number of gay activists, like Andrew Sullivan and Bruce Bawer, who advocated a more pragmatic approach to equal rights. The radical contingent of the LGBT community has long pejoratively described these types of gay and bi people — those who prioritize marriage equality, the right to serve openly in the military, and peaceful inclusion in Western society — as “assimilationist.” Real gay liberation, the radicals argue, will result from razing Western civilization and its capitalist, cisheteropatriarchal system and rebuilding it in their utopian vision. Like the gay journalist Donna Minkowitz once said to Charlie Rose, “We don’t want a place at the table — we want to turn the table over.”

The thing is, the pragmatic approach won. Today, gay, lesbian, and bi people get married, serve proudly, have jobs, own homes, and raise families. Like black civil rights leaders who preached nonviolent protest and a politics of respectability, discerning LGBT activists took the long view. We don’t want to exist on the margins of society, they insisted, we want to participate in it. LGBT people, just like black Americans, are a vital part of the fabric of this nation.

But the radicals haven’t taken this defeat lying down. After the 2015 Supreme Court decision in Obergefell v. Hodges, which made marriage equality the law of the land, the radicals pounced. “You got what you want,” they seemed to say. “Now it’s our turn.” LGBT rights organizations, either under the influence of impatient extremists or in an attempt to stay relevant (i.e., donor-worthy), refocused their missions to a form of revolutionary activism that purports to fight on behalf of trans people but in practice agitates for a revolt against Enlightenment ideals, liberalism, capitalism, and even basic biology.

Every LGBT organization seemingly became an extension of a university Gender Studies department, whose purpose was not to produce new knowledge but to interrogate — or, in their academic lingo, queer — existing knowledge which they spuriously associate with “whiteness”, colonialism, and Western patriarchy. Alongside this, a new social hierarchy of disadvantage was erected, where everyone was in competition to be the most “marginalized” — and therefore deserving of resources, a voice, and power in the revolutionaries’ value system. According to that value system, being gay or bi seemed to matter far less if one were also white, cis, and male, and therefore deemed to be in cahoots with the oppressors.

In 2017, while I was a student at Columbia University, I interned for GLAAD, one of the largest LGBT organizations in the US. Not only had their mission absorbed this new orthodoxy, it had filtered down to the interpersonal level. On campus and at GLAAD’s offices, I was regularly called “cis” in a kind of sneering, vitriolic tone that reminded me more than a little of the bullies who called me “fag” in middle school. The oddest thing was that much of the vitriol was coming from people who didn’t seem to be LGB, or even T, but who identified only as nonbinary or “queer.” Many of the people I encountered seemed to be profoundly homophobic. Any gay or bi man that didn’t at least adopt he/they pronouns, especially if they were white, was considered assimilationist, right-wing, traitorous upholders of the evil sex binary.

I never quite got used to being eyed with suspicion by other activists for my normative, gender-conforming appearance, or the constant bad-faith interpretations of anything I said. The only cis white gays spared this unfairly cold treatment were the ones who made a public show of being self-hating — the ones who renounced their “cis white gayness” and frequently apologized for their white privilege.

It was alarming to be on the receiving end of such vitriol simply for being myself — for not shaving one side of my head, painting my nails, piercing my septum, and adopting plural pronouns. It was alarming especially because so much of the hate I received when I was young came precisely because I was way too sex-nonconforming (in fact, in middle school, my classmates would often ask me if I was a boy or a girl). I wondered if my peers cared that I had been mercilessly bullied as a gay kid, or that I had worked on a trans rights anti-discrimination campaign when they were barely teenagers. I knew that my volunteering for marriage equality wouldn’t earn me any points, since marriage was to them an antiquated Western institution and part of an “assimilationist” agenda. This attitude has become so entrenched in LGBT activist spaces, I suspect it partially explains why support for same-sex marriage among Gen Z Americans has dropped from 80% in 2021 to only 69% in 2023.

Last year, I got a little more clarity about this issue when I came across an article, also written in 1994, by Stephen H. Miller. The publishing journal, Heterodoxy, titled it “Gay-Bashing by Homosexuals,” although Miller’s original title was “Gay White Males: PC’s Unseen Target.” In the late 1980s and early 90s, Miller chaired the media committee of GLAAD’s New York chapter. In fact, Miller came up with GLAAD’s mission statement, which was to “fight for fair, accurate and inclusive representations of gay and lesbian lives in the media and elsewhere.” In the article, Miller wrote that he was “purged” from GLAAD in 1992 because he objected to the rising political correctness and censoriousness in the gay, lesbian, and bisexual movement. Similar to the cultural shifts of the past decade, Miller recounts how activist organizations began prioritizing race and gender (and of course, the Correct political views) over individual merit. New staff members had to attend “endless sensitivity sessions” which “identified white men (whatever their sexual orientation) as the oppressor class.” Suddenly, it seemed like there was more antagonism towards the “white males” within the LGBT rights movement than without. Miller, who described himself as a “political moderate who believed in dialogue with the straight world and a good-faith search for common ground,” found himself “shunned.”

The race and gender quotas that LGBT rights organizations began adopting, Miller wrote, included weighted voting that favored women and people of color. For example, after regional delegations of organizers for the 1993 March on Washington for LGB rights failed to achieve their quotas, it was decided that women’s votes would count for three votes apiece and non-white votes would count for two votes apiece. That decision — and the many others that have since followed in LGBT activist spaces — calls to mind some dark and creepy moments from American history best learned from rather than imitated.

Of course, this also raises the question: Who decides who is a person of color and who is white, and how? Will they apply the one-drop rule, the early 20th-century legal principle that deemed any American with even one black ancestor (“one drop of black blood”) as black? I suppose that would be illegal since the Supreme Court outlawed the one-drop rule in its 1967 Loving v. Virginia decision. And yet, I’m not surprised by these backward tactics. It was Ibram X. Kendi who recently wrote, “The only remedy to past discrimination is present discrimination. The only remedy to present discrimination is future discrimination.” Around and around we go.

Then as now, as Miller wrote, anyone who challenged this illiberal orthodoxy was “deemed racist and sexist” and accused of harboring the belief that “white men are the main victims of discrimination.” Naturally, Miller notes, such accusations serve to discourage people who sense this hostility toward gay white men from voicing their dissent.

Then after AIDS decimated gay and bi male activist communities, lesbian radical feminists moved in, and a “critical attitude toward men, male sexuality, and ‘the patriarchy’” became the norm. “Male solidarity, once a hallmark of gay liberation, is now anathema.”

A direct line can be drawn from this upheaval in the early 1990s and the divisiveness in today’s LGBT activist spaces, where “cis gays” — and, in particular, “cis white gays” — are seen as upholders of villainous Western cisheteropatriarchy and its henchman capitalism. These modern activists are sure to include “white” not only out of an animus against white people, but because they assume that all people of color are helpless victims of Western capitalism who, because of their oppression, invariably hold the “correct” far-left politics. In his aforementioned article, Kushner invoked Oscar Wilde, quoting “A map of the world that does not include Utopia is not worth even glancing at.” He added that he is “always suspicious of the glacier-paced patience of the right.” Writing for The Advocate, the gay writer Bruce Bawer responded that he and so many others are “impatient with models of activism that involve playing at revolution instead of focusing on the serious work of reform.”

This anti-“cis white gay” attitude proliferates in LGBT media as well. “White Gay Men Are Hindering Our Progress as a Queer Community” was the title of an article published in the magazine Them. “You had your time — now, we have other things to fight for,” read the subhead. “Let's Talk About People That Aren't Young Cis White Gay Men,” a HuffPost article was titled.

I could go on and on.

A few years ago, I attended a conference for LGBT journalists. There, I met a young, white, gay writer who would go on to work for a progressive news outlet in New York. He said his upbringing in a Southern state had made him racist, but since then, he has “trained” himself to be attracted to black and brown people, and now black and brown people are the only types of people he wants to sleep with.

If this is the “progressive” strategy for combating racism, I want no part of it. And any liberal cis white gay person who opposes racism won’t either. This is racism, operating under the guise of “anti-racism”, plain and simple. It attempts to end inequality by inverting it and, in the process, is attacking the foundations of the principles that have enabled the remarkable progress our society has made in transcending bigotry and prejudice. I only wish more people who saw this dogma for what it is were unafraid to voice the truth about it.

==

Homophobia and anti-gay hate are alive and well as progressive virtues.

[preeningpisces]

Kenjaku NSFW Headcanons

Don’t yell at me please, I have extremely questionable taste

Lemme know if you want me to elaborate or write something about any of these ♥️

18+ content below, mdni, implied chubby f!reader, dark content

TW: implied non-con, mention of odd kinks

ꕥ Definitely the freakiest freak. Bitch has probably tried everything. Wherever your mind went, the answer is yes, he probably tried that too. This dude is old and bored and has too much free time on his hands; a perfect example of why retirement homes are a thing

ꕥ Very detached the whole time which is unnerving, but also sexy in a way. It’s like he’s just conducting an experiment and observing the results

ꕥ Making him lose his composure, no matter how brief, is one of the hottest things you'll see. Trust meee

ꕥ Their libido is greatly affected by the vessel, even their kinks/preferences are affected. Very aware where his tastes end, and the vessels begins, but he’ll entertain them regardless. Hedonistic mfer

ꕥ Loves figuring out how new bodies work. He has very unique insights about sex because of this, and it makes him surprisingly skilled. He knows his way around very well, and how different preferences can be or how differently ppl can experience pleasure

ꕥ Attracted to intellect & humor—goofy bitches rise up. People who interest him in some way are more likely to be kept around than someone with just a pretty face. He isn’t loving tho, he just likes someone he can fuck around with, and pick apart their brain for entertainment (not literally…I think)

ꕥ Likes that your body is so malleable, and submits to his touch. When he squeezes, his fingers dip into your flesh, as if he's an artist and you're clay—oh so poetic

ꕥ On the topic of submitting: I don’t think he’d be want to be submissive. He’s too egotistical and doesn’t trust other ppl enough. Maybe they’d fuck with it occasionally with someone trustworthy enough

ꕥ Yknow when people say things like ‘my ex used to do this thing with their tongue’ and they don’t really know how to describe what they did, or why it felt so good? That’s what having sex with Kenjaku is like. Lots of odd tricks in that squishy lil brain

ꕥ His dirty talk is direct, smooth and cold. Usually condescending. Again, they’ve got that scientist vibe so everything they say is almost like an observation, but somehow he says it in a sexy way. He’s a manipulator, so he’s good with his words. Also bro has 0 shame, they will say the nastiest shit if the mood strikes them

ꕥ Talkative in bed, kind of like when he fights. What a nerd. Someone shove him in a locker for me. It pertains to whatever you’re doing, don’t get me wrong, he isn’t lecturing you about cursed energy while he’s got you bent over. Probably.

ꕥ Not possessive at all, will totally pimp you out. Very cocky when you quickly realize they aren’t as skilled as him

ꕥ Likes to do shocking things in bed just to toy with you and see how you react. Usually pretty cruel and sadistic when they do these things

ꕥ Toy enthusiast, idgaf. Will tape a vibrator to your clit, get a fucking machine, and just leave you there for hours. He’d probably record it to watch later so he can go do his nefarious plotting and deeds while you suffer

ꕥ Medical kink king, he absolutely fucks with a nice speculum. He’ll strap you down to an examination table & crank you open like it’s a car jack. Inject weird shit into you, maybe some erotic e-stim stuff too

ꕥ I consulted Gege, and he said clit enlargement/pump. He’ll get it all puffed up and raw before going to town on it—both hot and horrifying

ꕥ Breeding kink but in the worst way

ꕥ Very very into fluids & mess: I’ll let you decide what that means LMFAO

ꕥ IDK I just get the vibe he's a whacky and unpredictable in the bedroom because he's all about reactions. He's just a curious lil guy, don't be mad at him