#I bet tons of people have posted this but still

[der-schweizer]

There's my portal

As i said on @bet-on-me-13 'Where is my portal' post, here is my short about their idea. please enjoy.

Danny sipped his coffee, slowly shuffling towards his lab. It had been a long time since he had a ‘run on two coffees and some ecto’ weekend but here he was, Monday morning, on his way to work.

He really wanted to be in bed but he had bills to pay.

Quietly he shuffled into his lab, which he found oddly drafty and oddly bright, considering he hadn’t turned on the lights yet. After flicking them on he moved on towards his desk, passing a big gaping hole in the wall and—

Danny paused, shuffled backwards a bit and then looked at the place where his portal used to be. For a long moment he just looked, then did a slow blink and took another sip of coffee.

After making sure that his portal, including parts of the wall, were really gone, he let out a sigh and held his face. “Who the fuck stole my door?”

With a sigh he pushed his bangs out of his face and walked to his PC, to check the security footage of his Cameras. For once it wasn’t Vlad who stole his shit, Vlad at least had the courtesy to leave a note that he ‘borrowed’ something. It was safe to say that he was surprised to find the footage gone. There weren't many people that could hack through Tucker's programing.

Danny sat there, looking at the black screen of his PC for a long moment before thinking aloud. “Okay, we have one or more people who can; One, break through Tuckers firewalls. Two, physically move a portal weighing around ten tons and, Three, knows their way around Arcane Runes so as to not cause a mass ghost invasion.”

He thought about it for a minute before throwing his hands up. “Fuck this, I’m just going to use the other side to find it.” He got out of his chair before transforming. 

Danny focused his power into one of his fingers before poking the air in front of him, the tip of it pierced the fabric of space which he then used to rip it open. He quickly flew through the tear before it sealed again. Despite Wulf teaching him how to do it he still sucked at it, which was the main reason he built his portal.

Once in the Zone he looked around for it. He found it after over two hours of searching, which only served to piss him off to the point where he began muttering curses under his breath.

Standing in front of it, he gave it a quick inspection. After inspecting the Runes, Danny had to admit that, whoever had stolen it, knew his way around them. They pretty much locked out anyone not authorized and or approved by the Caster. Too bad for them, Danny had the ‘Masterkey’ and went through anyway.

John Constantine was holding his face, quietly counting to ten. Neither smoking nor drinking would help in this situation. After reaching fifty he ran his hands over his head, looking at the assembled brigade of idiots in front of him.

“Okay, let me get this straight.” He started, “You,” he pointed at Batman, “found an ‘unknown energy signature’ and went to investigate. Then you found a high security lab with had an active portal to ‘who knows where’ and your first decision was to fucking steal it?!?!”

Superman moved forward, opening his mouth to counter but Constantine didn't let him. “AND you moron helped him steal it, not to mention you!” he pointed at flash, “Help install it here, in the watchtower, without telling anyone from JLD about it?”

Flash looked a bit sheepish at him. “Well, in my defense I didn’t know it was stolen.”

Constantine wanted to bash his head against the next closest bulkhead, maybe that would help.

“Okay, okay.” Constantine facepalmed, trying to stop the aneurysm from building up more.

A deep chill suddenly filled the air and sent goosebumps all over his back, “Oh this is just getting better and better.” Constantine reached into his pocket for a warding charm, before turning around and swearing. He stopped swearing when he saw who had come through. “Oh, hey Phantom.”

“Constantine, why the fuck did you steal my portal?” Danny wasn’t even pissed anymore. He knew the English drunktard too well to blame him. Granted he was obnoxious, didn’t pay back his debt and came whenever it suited him, but Danny liked the man. He didn’t exasperate problems and always did what was necessary.

“Look, I didn’t.” He then threw a thumb over his shoulder, “Those morons did.”

“Constantine, do you know this entity?” Batman already looked on high alert.

“Excuse you! I have a name. And that is my Portal. Explain why it isn't where it is supposed to be.”

“The sensors of the Watchtower found an unknown energy signature, upon investigation we found an unsecured pathway to a different dimension, so we secured it.”

Danny stared at Batman for a solid minute, then simply said, “Oh I'm going to sue your ass so hard your grandkids will feel it.”

[beingsuneone]

I BET You Think About Me

SYNOPSIS: being Theo’s girlfriend is a dream… until you find out why he asked you out in the first place.

FANDOM: Harry Potter

PAIRING(S): Theodore Nott x fem!reader

RATING: PG

CHARACTERS MENTIONED: Enzo, Blaise, Draco, Mattheo, Pansy, Snape

GENRE/AU: Snape’s Daughter!Reader, Asks you out cause of a bet, kind of angsty, kind of fluffy, slytherin!reader

WORD COUNT: 2.6K

WARNINGS: swearing and kissing.

A/N: agh. It’s 3 in the morning. Enjoy. May have a tiny bit of pacing issues but it’s fine

DEDICATIONS: the polls who decided they wanted Theo while I decided I was gonna post Mattheo and Rhysand instead.

CREDITS: n/a

…Six Months Ago….

——————————————————————————

“You can’t do it, Theo.” Draco says plainly. “If she’s anything like her father she won’t be able to feel that kind of emotion.”

Theo shakes his head. “She’s still a girl.”

Mattheo snorts, Enzo sputters. “That’s a bit sexist, Theo.” Enzo says, looking over at Y/n L/n.

She’s Severus Snape’s daughter and completely untouchable. Theo hasn’t seen a single guy going out with her in the whole six years they’d been at hogwarts.

That might be because of her father.

“Draco’s right.” Mattheo says. “She’ll never fall for you.”

“I’m gonna prove you guys wrong and you’re gonna owe me a shit ton of money for it.”

…. One Month Ago ….

——————————————————————————

Mattheo stares at you as you walks away. “Damn, I guess you were right.” Both him and Draco reach for their wallets but Theo waves them off.

“I don’t want it— any of it.” It felt for him wrong to take the money from the bet. Theo had fallen for you just as hard— if not harder— as you’d fallen for him.

Hell, Theo would kiss the ground you walked on if you asked him.

“What do you mean?” Blaise asks incredulously. “You won the bet.”

Theo furrows his eyebrows. “Whatever, I don’t want the money.”

They all stare at him.

One, two, three minutes of silence before Mattheo blurts out: “Oh my god. Theo fell for her.” He starts to laugh, and the other boy's eyes widen.

“Wow. That’s a little bit pathetic, Theo.” Draco teases.

Pansy slides in beside Blaise. “Wow. Famous playboy Theodore Nott fell for someone?” She snickers. “Who?”

Theo deadpans. “What do you mean who?” You are Pansy’s roommate after all, Pansy should better than anybody.

Her face falls. “You don’t mean y/n. do you?” Theo nods and she gives him an exasperated look. “Theo! You literally only dated her to win a bet!”

“Yeah, I know!” He retorts. A beat of silence, then, “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“You have to tell her.” Enzo cuts in. “If you truly like her, it isn’t something you can keep secret.”

Theo nods his head absentmindedly. “I know, I know. I’ll tell her soon.”

He didn’t want his new relationship to end before it ever began.

….Present….

——————————————————————————

Today, you woke up late, stubbed your toe on your bed and then spent the ten minutes you had to get ready looking for your damned potions book.

When you’d finally found it, threw on your uniform and got your hair into some sort of presentable, you rushed out your dorm and down the hallways as fast as your feet would take you.

Your class was on the opposite side of Hogwarts and you were already ten minutes late.

In your haste, you aren’t watching for other people in front of you and run straight into someone.

“I’m so sorry!” You exclaim frantically, picking up your books as she picks up hers.

She looks familiar but you don’t know her name.

“No, it’s okay— Oh.” Her faces twists into a scowl when she meets your gaze. “You’re Theo’s ‘Girlfriend’” she airquotes as she says ‘girlfriend’, causing you to narrow your eyes at here.

You furrow your eyebrows. “Uhm, yeah, I am. Why did you say it like that?”

She crosses her arms. “Because you and I both know that he doesn’t actually like you. You’re not his girlfriend.”

“And who, exactly, are you?” You ask, annoyance settling in your chest.

She looks down at you, a cocky expression written on her face. “You should probably just stay away from him, you know that, right?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Really, he’s going to be mine so I don’t even know what you’re doing.” She waves you off, as if she truly believes this.

You shuffle your books around in your arms and shift your weight into your other leg. “You do know that you’re not his girlfriend, right?”

“Whatever.” She shrugs, and you still don’t know her name. “Doesn’t matter if he calls you his girlfriend, it’s not like you’re a threat anyway.”

What does she mean ‘not a threat’? You feel like that’s a sentence better used to describe her considering, you’re Theo’s actual girlfriend. “What is that supposed to mean?” You ask incredulously but still relatively calm.

She gives you a mock sympathetic expression. “Oh, Sweetheart,” She starts, taunting you with each syllable. “You didn’t really think someone like Theo would settle down for someone like you… do you? I mean, he’s all parties and good times and you’re… well, you can’t even dress yourself properly.”

She looks you up and down, from your half-untucked uniform shirt to your loose tie and your unwrinkled skirt. You’re not usually this messed up. “Clearly, I do, because he did.” You pause, sigh deeply and roll your eyes. “Why am I even entertaining this conversation?” You turn away from her, preparing to tune her out and walk away.

She tuts, shaking her head. “Because you obviously know you mean nothing to him— after all when your relationship starts with a bet, I don’t think it’s ever been super stable.”

This makes you stop and turn back to her. “A bet?” You say it slowly and the words taste awful on your tongue. “What bet?”

She scoffs-laughs and smiles evilly. “Oops, did I say too much?”

Theo chooses this moment to walk up behind the two of your . He slides his hand around my waist, letting it rest there as he stands beside me. “Are you okay? You’re super late.” He asks, looking you over. His eyes flit over to the girl who was talking to you and his nose scrunched. “Why are you talking to Tracey?”

Tracey, that’s her name.

I don’t think he likes her too much.

Tracey opens her mouth to respond but I cut her off and begin dragging Theo away. “I don’t even know, Theo, let’s go.”

I can feel Tracey’s glare until we’re well out of her line of sight.

Jealous.

……

You can’t get Tracey’s words out of your head. You know it was a tactic to rile you up and, you suppose, it worked but you had this horrible feeling that maybe she wasn’t lying.

Asking Theo about it though? That was hard; you didn’t want him to think you didn’t trust him but you also didn’t want to get upset before you knew whether it was true or not.

You decided to ask one or two other people before Theo. Pansy Parkinson, was first. She’s been your friend since first year but she hung out with Theo’s group long before you ever did.

“Hey, Pansy.” You say airily. She looks up at you and smiles.

The bed creaks as you fall down onto it and sigh. “Can I ask you a random question?” You ask, fidgeting with the corner of your blankets.

She looks up at you expectantly but also with a good deal of worry. “Yeah, of course; What’s up?”

She shifts in her spot at the end of her bed, turning her full attention to me.

“Did you ever… I don’t know,” you stop, trying to find the correct words. “Did you ever hear anything about Me, Theo and a bet? While you were, like, hanging out with them.”

Pansy looks down at your fidgeting fingers and then furrows her eyebrows. She thinks about it for a minute, and her face drops so slightly I almost don’t catch it. “Oh, y/n…” she trails off. “He didn’t tell you?”

Every muscle in your body locks up. “He didn’t tell me what?” You don’t think you really want the confirmation now that you know it’s coming.

Pansy stands and then sits down next to you and pulls you into her in a side hug. “When Theo started trying to get with you it was because of a bet.” She stops but you just gesture for her to continue. “… I wasn’t actively apart of this conversation so I only got the gist of it but I was there.”

“What was the bet.” You say, with your eyes hot and your throat restricted. Your tone makes it seem like it wasn’t a question.

“The boys bet him that he couldn’t make the next woman he saw fall in love with him by the end of the year.” She gives your a sad smile. “I guess the next woman was you.”

What. The. Fuck. You’re gonna kill him, because he obviously won that goddamn bet already. You give Pansy a quick squeeze and then stand up. “I need to go talk to him.”

Pansy nods and walks back to her own bed, waving bye as you walk through the door.

Your vision is a bit blurry and your hands are shaking with betrayal and anger as you storm away from the girl’s dorms and right through the common room to the boy’s dorms.

When you reach his door, you knock loudly, despite it being late.

Draco answers. He looks you up and down and then turns his back halfway to you. “Theo, your girlfriend is here.”

Theo appears a moment later, an easy smile and his piercing eyes that you want to love so badly right now. He gently moves you back a bit and steps out of the dorm. “Hey, Baby, what’s up?”

You shudder at the pet name and his face drops. “Oh, I don’t know, Theo.”

He pulls you to the other side of the hall and keeps his hands on your arms, comforting both yourself and him. “What’s wrong? Did somebody do something to you?”

The worry on his face seems so genuine, you almost want to believe the bet was a lie— but you’re not that stupid.

“Yeah, Theo, someone hurt me.” You pause. “It was you and your fucking bet.”

He freezes. “Shit. Who told you about that?”

You don’t want to— no, you can’t look in his eyes. “That girl, Tracey, and then Pansy filled in the finer details.” You’re arms are crossed now and he can’t hold you like he was before. “Is that seriously the only thing you care about right now— actually, obviously it would be because I’m just a bet, right?”

He opens his mouth to speak but you don’t let him. “Actually,” you continue. “I don’t want to hear it— just, have a good life, Theo. I’d say we’re over but I don’t think we really ever started to begin with.”

You walk away before you second-guess yourself and ignore as he calls your name. He doesn’t run after you, which you’re equally glad for and disappointed by.

God, you don’t think your heart has ever hurt this bad.

…..

You haven’t seen Theo in class for the whole week after you ‘broke up’; you’ve seen glimpses of him outside, always smoking, or eating in the Great Hall but it’s like he’s intentionally missing every class you have together.

He probably is.

He shouldn't have that right. You’re the one who gets to avoid him, he doesn’t get to avoid you.

You’re the one who got played like a violin and ended up battered and bruised.

You don’t see him for most of your days, but, when you do— when you look at him, his eyes are always already on you.

As a result the other Slytherin boys glance at you while he stares, because of how intensely he does so. You can feel his eyes burning holes into you at all times.

You try your best to ignore him as you stand to leave the Great Hall.

A boy stops you near the entrance, you think you recognize him. He’s the same year as you, and pretty nice as far as you know. His name is Lucas, you’re pretty sure.

“Hey.” Lucas says warmly. “How are you?”

He’s a bit close, and you’re sort of backed into the wall. You laugh awkwardly. “I’m alright, um, how are you?”

He smiles. “About the same,” he looks behind him and then back at you, same easy-going smile that isn’t easy the way Theo’s is. “Anyways, I was wondering… since you broke up with Nott, maybe you’d wanna go out sometime? With me?”

“She doesn’t.”

Lucas’s shoulders jump at the sound of Theo’s voice and he backs away from you and spins to look at Theo, whose standing there with a dangerous look on his face.

You glare at him. “Maybe I do want to.” It’s a challenge and Theo knows it.

Lucas sputters. “You know, I actually realized I’m busy, so…” he scrambles off after that you’re left with Theo.

You scowl at him. “Theo, what the fuck?”

“He’s not good enough for you.” He shrugs like he knows what’s good enough for you. Mr. Bet-Winner.

Your heart aches in your chest just looking at him. “And how would you know what’s good enough for me, Theo? because you sure as hell weren’t.”

He scowls now. “I treated you like you were a fucking princess, Y/n, all he would’ve done was treat you like a piece of ass.”

You huff. “A princess, Theo? None of it was even real!” You spin to walk away but Theo catches your wrist and pulls you back; he slips his other arm around your waist and pulls you right to his chest. Your faces almost touch.

Your breath hitches like the traitor that it is.

He pulls your hand up to rest on his chest, where his heart beats hard and erratically. “Does this feel fake to you?” Theo’s fingers dig lightly into your waist. “Do you honestly think that all of that— everything we said and did— meant nothing?”

His breath fans across your face.

Your whole body feels like it’s on fire, and he’s the ice bucket that can save you— but your pride and anger are like the fires of hell; irreparable.

“You took a bet to make me fall for you, Theo, and lucky for you, you won it. How much was I worth, huh?”

He replies almost instantly. “I didn’t take any money, Y/n.” Theo breathes deeply and you feel his chest rise and fall, forcing yours to do the same.

“You— what?” You can feel your resolve cracking, the hope leaking through that somehow you were wrong.

“Let me explain the full story.” He waits for you to give him confirmation; you nod and he continues. “Yes, it started with the bet, and yes, I had never planned for it to last. It was cruel and mean, and I’m sorry. But the thing is, I didn’t anticipate that I would end up falling in love with you right back.” The words feel like a kick to the heart.

“But, on the other hand, how could I not? You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen and you’re intelligent and funny, you laugh at all my stupid jokes. You love potions more than any other class and you’re really good at it too.” He stops. “Y/n, you’re perfect and I’m so, so sorry I never told you— or, even worse, that I did it in the first place.”

Your heart skips several beats. “Oh.”

“Oh?”

“Oh.” You’re at a loss for words.

He just looks you over, trying to assess what’s running through your mind like he always does. “Please forgive me, Y/n. I love you so much it hurts.”

You pull away from him and he reluctantly lets go, his shoulders sagging in defeat.

“You’re serious?” You ask quietly. “No bets this time? Nothing you haven’t told me?”

He shakes his head, giving you the saddest, puppy-dog look, unintentionally.

You’re silent for another long moment before, finally, you say: “you love me?”

Theo looks into your eyes. “God, yes.”

“Okay.” You say softly.

He straightens. “Okay, you’ll get back together with me or Okay, I don’t forgive you?”

You hold up one finger and he seems to understand because he pulls you back into him so quickly and presses his lips to mine; you kiss him back, and kind of stand there, kissing, for a long moment. Probably longer than you should’ve.

But you wish he never had to stop.

All content belongs to @beingsuneone , do not repost, copy or post on other platforms without my permission.

[qraceiuv]

"slut!" jude bellingham.

summary — you finally release an unexpected song about your relationship after receiving countless hate for it.

notes — send reqs and shit 😙

warnings — hate comments thats it rlly

_________________________________________

y/nsusername

y/nsusername: 🍒👡

—

username: she never posts jude anymore

username: i rlly dont like her

— username: okay...

username: shes using jude idc

username: bet jude got those heels for her

— username: u act like she isnt a model/singer whos just as successful as him

username: she doesnt deserve him

— username: and you do?

username: ur all insane and sad. leave her alone

username: shes too pretty to be acting the way she does

— username: she doesnt do anything...

username: slut

y/nsusername

y/nsusername: coming soon...

—

username: OH??

username: yayy

username: nobody cares

username: i cant take her seriously

username: still no jude posts

username: she didnt even go to his match yesterday

username: she always uses guys wtf

username: why does evergone hate her?

— username: because shes dating jude and people are stupid

y/nsusername

y/nsusername: my new single "slut!" drops tonight, and i can't wait for you all to hear it. i love this song and myself, and to be able to share it is a pleasure. 🤍🩵

—

username: omg.

username: her naming it slut... not even gonna listen

username: WHAT.

username: im freaking out

username: this is abt to be a power move.

username: oh!

judebellingham

judebellingham: My lovely y/n - I'm endlessly proud of her and everything she has accomplished as of recently. Her strength is beyond me and I will forever admire it.

Lots of things have been said about her these past few months, and I realize I should've made a statement. Her kindness told me not to, but now is the right time to share my love for such an amazing woman. Y/n has dealt with so much hate in the world, and I hate to see it. You never know the person behind the screen, and I have always encouraged kindness. Please apply it to those I love.

I have never felt so happy with anyone than I do with you, Y/n. I love you, and I love all of you who have stuck by us and supported my favorite girl.

—

username: i will cry.

username: i hope u all shut up now

username: BRO HE LOVES HER SM😭

username: the hating bitches are silent now

username: js a ton of 12 year olds jealous

username: i love them sm

username: "slut!" was so cunty idc

username: stream slut!!!!!

y/nsusername: ❤️❤️❤️💋💋💋

y/nsusername: i love you so much.

— judebellingham: I love you so much more

judebellingham added to their instagram story!

_________________________________________

[mortimermcmirestinks]

for fuck's sake, can we start being nicer about spiders?

every time I want to talk about cute or cool or badass spiders I get at least one fucking japester who's like "oh I bet it won't be tiresome and irritating if I write trite and unprompted flash fiction about murdering innocent and harmless animals with fire (a particularly torturous form of death) THIS time", and they're wrong every single fucking time.

I would rather have ten people telling me they are horny for spiders every time I mention an arachnid from now until the day I die than have to continue living in a world where one of my favourite animals is most well-known on the internet for being the centre of a quote-unquote "joke" about extreme and pointlessly cruel animal abuse.

jesus christ, guys. spiders are just animals. they're not even, like, pests, or invasive, or anything. the vast overwhelming majority of them can't even hurt humans, and the ones that can don't want to.

like, shit, sorry for the graphic image, but how would you feel if every time you posted a picture of a cute cat you got replies saying "if I saw that in my house I'd put it in a fucking beartrap"? because that's how I'm starting to feel about the "burn the house down when you see a spider" joke.

and before you get on my ass about arachnophobia, I am arachnophobic, being in the immediate IRL presence of spiders gives me an uncontrollable physical fear response, but the existence of arachnophobes does not give you free reign to jack off to the idea of being able to freely torture and murder animals that "give you the ick". you cannot trot out arachnophobia here as an excuse. there are tons of people who are scared of dogs. doesn't mean you gotta be a dick about dogs. same with spiders.

one of the most popular superheroes in the world is spider-themed and you still got fuckers out here thinking they're the funniest man alive for making jokes about killing spiders holy shit

anyway, rant over. picture of a cute spider under the cut ->

just a little guy! hello! if he was a character in a video game he'd have a squeaky little voice and ask you to help him find his buttons!

[flowerxbunnie]

will you please write chris being a softie but also fucking you in the shower people don’t write about chris being soft enough!!!!

Steam

Chris x Fem reader

Warnings: fluff to smut, shower sex

DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE NOT OKAY WITH SMUT OR ARE A MINOR!

The flannel sheets are tangled around us and I can feel the body heat emanating off of Chris. His hand strokes my hair as we lay facing each other, lazy smiles shared as we blink slowly and breathe in this moment.

Slow mornings with him are my favorite, he makes it feel like the weight of the world is gone. Like every breath is deep and satisfying. Everything is right.

“Your eyes are so beautiful,” he speaks in a low raspy voice still ridden with sleep.

I smile and press my lips against his as an unspoken thank you. He has morning breath, but I don’t even care.

His brown waves are messy and sticking out in every direction. His eyes are still puffy from waking and his cheeks are rosy. The sunlight coming in through the window illuminates every dip and crevice of his neck and collarbones. I can see his steady heartbeat pulsing in his neck.

His arm falls across my shoulder and he brushes my hair out of the way, his fingers tickling my back through the fabric of my sleep shirt. His eyes scan every inch of me, his pupils expanding as they roam from my face to my chest, and all the way to my arms to see the goosebumps that erupt under his touch.

“I wish we lived in the renaissance or whatever. I would learn to sculpt so I could carve you into marble.” He says while bringing his hand to brush up and down my arm.

“You.. learning to sculpt? I don’t think your attention span would allow that,” I giggle, turning over and pressing my back into his warm chest.

His arms wrap around me and his lips press a kiss into my hair before hovering over my ear. “I think I’d manage. Have you seen yourself?”

I blush and close my eyes, feeling comfort under his embrace with his breath fanning over my neck.

We spend what feels like an eternity tossing and turning in his bed. Hands roaming our bodies with a touch so light like we were made of glass, scared to shatter each other. Lips kissing whatever exposed skin we could find. Our love is tangible when we’re alone together.

Chris is always so gentle with me when nobody else is around. He has a way of making my heart swell with his words, something he keeps a secret from the world. With other people he makes himself out to be this silly boyfriend, poking fun at me, goofing off and posting ridiculous pictures of me on my birthday, telling everyone he still thinks “girls have cooties.”

But when we’re alone, he melts into the softest man I’ve ever known. He loves to be babied and cuddled, his head usually in my lap and my fingers in his hair. He whispers sweet nothings to me every morning, never letting me go a second without feeling the weight of his love. He would never tell anyone, but he bought his own camera to record snippets of our days on the beach, our hikes, our picnics at his favorite places.

We wake up a second time together after hearing footsteps shuffling on the top floor. Chris turns over to look at the clock on his nightstand, huffing as he stretches and plops his head back down onto his pillow.

“Guess it’s time to get ready for the day. Got tons of meetings later.” He says as he throws the blanket off of himself, sitting up and throwing his legs over the edge of the bed.

“Nooo, I need more of you before I have to go home,” I whine, reaching my arms out and opening and closing my hands.

“Nick and Matt are probably mad at me already, I bet they’re plotting to leave me here. As much as I’d love to rot in bed with you I really need to take a shower,” he says while digging through his drawers for boxers and socks.

I huff and pull the blanket up to my chin, watching as he moves to his closet and picks an outfit for the day. He opens the door to the bathroom and puts his stuff on the counter before walking back to my side of the bed. He leans down and grabs both of my cheeks in his hands before placing a kiss on my forehead.

“If you want to, you can shower with me?” he smiles with bright eyes and extends his hand to me.

“Hmm, fine. Fair enough.” I concede and grab his hand.

He pulls me to my feet and leads me to the bathroom, both of us squinting as I flip the bright light on. He takes his pajama pants and boxers off, tossing them in the hamper behind the door. I start to undo the buttons on my sleep shirt but his hands grasp mine and pull them away.

“Let me do it,” he whispers.

His slender fingers go slowly, carefully undoing each button as he goes lower. His eyes flick up to meet mine and I can’t help but blush. He returns his focus to his task and eventually finishes, standing back up and pushing the fabric off my shoulders. He slides my shorts down to the floor and picks both of them up to toss them in the hamper.

“I’ll wash them and get them back to you in tip top shape,” he smiles, “you can wear some of clothes home.”

I give him a nod and a smile and he opens the glass shower door, turning the knobs and checking the temperature of the water with his hand. He motions for me to step in first, so I scoot by him and gasp as the freezing water pelts against my skin.

“Oh shit baby, I’m so sorry!” He pushes me out of the way and lets the water hit him instead, turning the hot water knob to the right some more. “It felt warmer on my hands.”

“It’s okay Chrissy, just a little cold.” I say as my teeth begin to chatter softly.

He pulls me into his arms and rubs his hands up and down on my skin to warm me back up, letting the hot water fall onto the both of us. He places three soft kisses to the top of my head before pulling back and looking into my eyes.

“Can I wash your hair?” he asks sweetly.

“Mmm please,” I hum, "I love when you play with my hair.”

He reaches to the ledge on the wall and grabs my shampoo. He always makes sure to keep doubles of my favorite self care items at his house. I move my head under the water, letting it get soaked through as he pumps some of the apple scented shampoo into his hand.

He rubs his hands together to create a lather before motioning his head to tell me to turn around. I follow his instruction and face away from him, sighing as his fingertips begin to knead into my scalp. He massages the shampoo into my roots and scratches my head gently, leaving no spot untouched. I feel his hands gather the lengths of my hair and drag the shampoo down. He’s so attentive and knows I never put straight shampoo on my ends, only the leftover bubbles.

He tilts my head back so I’m looking up, making sure the water isn’t going into my face or eyes. He rinses my hair carefully, massaging my scalp again and wringing out the ends.

“Isn’t it hair mask day?” He asks while already grabbing the container.

I give a light chuckle and nod, appreciating how closely he pays attention to the little details that could so easily be forgotten. He unscrews the lid and dips his fingers into the product before replacing it and putting it back on the shelf. He rubs his hands together again and coats the ends of my hair in the deep conditioner, finger combing it to make sure it’s all coated before twisting my hair and putting it in the claw clip I leave in his shower.

“That good?” He asks as I turn around to face him again.

“Perfect, baby. My turn now.”

I reach around him and grab his sandalwood shampoo as he wets his own locks, hair sticking to his forehead before he shakes it out of his face. I stand on my tiptoes and reach up to rub the shampoo in. His hands ghost at my waist and move to grip my sides, holding me up and leaning his head down so it’s easier to reach.

“Let me rinse it so you can rest your legs,” he smiles as he releases his grip on me and brings his own hands up to his hair and washes it clean.

I grab the loofah that’s hanging on one of the knobs and coat it in body wash, lathering it and bringing it to Chris’s chest. I rub in circular motions and watch the soap glide down his stomach, parting ways as it travels down his v line. He throws his head back as I slide the loofah across his shoulders, allowing me access to his neck. He turns around and I scrub his back, appreciating the muscles in his shoulder blades that flex and stretch as he moves his arms around for me. He spins back around to grab the loofah from me and wash his own legs and feet before rinsing and hanging it back up.

“What, I don’t get lathered down?” I pout, wanting to feel the soft exfoliation of the loofah.

“Yeah, just wanna use my hands.” He shoots a small smirk my way and pumps some of the body wash into his right hand.

“Filthy boy!” I fake a gasp and can’t help but let a small giggle escape my mouth.

He doesn’t say a word, he just rubs his hands together and brings them to my shoulders, rubbing slow circles and lathering the soap onto my skin. His hands glide down my arms, following the trails of the hot water as it flows down to my fingers. He interlocks his fingers into mine, bringing them up and placing an individual kiss to the back of each hand as his blue eyes lock onto mine. His skin is pink from the water beating down on us, and I watch as droplets fall down from his hair onto his cheeks. The look in his eyes is dark but observant, as if he’s studying every pore on my skin.

His hands glide up and rub across my sternum, his gaze following every move he makes. He slips them down over my breasts and I suck in a breath, his rough palms making my nipples harden. He bites his lip as he kneads them, the soap lubricating his hands and making everything slippery.

He removes one hand and grabs the bottle of body wash, hovering it over my chest and pumping some out to land on my breasts.

“Mmm, I feel like I’ve seen this before,” he smirks at his own dirty words and rubs it in paying extra close attention to my nipples, pinching them between his fingers repeatedly.

“Chris..” I sigh out, grabbing onto his arms and squeezing, my body reacting to him just the way he likes.

“I know, I know. Shh..” he whispers, sliding his hands up to my neck and gliding them over both sides.

He brings his hands to the nape of my neck and uses his thumbs against my jaw to tilt my head back. His face inches closer and closer before he presses his forehead into mine, his small breaths heating my face up as his mouth hangs open slightly.

“I can’t help myself, Nick and Matt are gonna have to wait a little bit longer.” He says lowly before hovering his lips over mine, not touching them together yet.

Our lips are begging to collide, both of us sitting there panting into eachother’s mouths beneath the steam of the water. I wish that I could imprint this into my brain, two lovers aching for touch but having the willpower to savor the moment.

“Let them wait, then.” I say.

As soon as the last word leaves my mouth, I feel his hands pull me closer to him and his warm lips against my own. It’s a slow but hungry kiss, the sound of smacking lips and deep breaths echoing off the shower walls. His tongue swipes against my bottom lip and I open my mouth in return. He wastes no time plunging his tongue into my mouth to explore.

His big hands glide down my back and settle on my ass, squeezing it roughly before pulling me against his body. I feel his erection pressing against my stomach, a steady pulse flowing through it and beating into my skin. My core throbs and heats up in desperate need of this beautiful man in front of me.

His kisses trail from my mouth to my jaw, and each one feels like it’s branding me and burning to the bone. He goes lower, first softly kissing down my neck before sucking the tender skin on my collarbones. I let out a sigh, my body falling further into his as my muscle start to go weak.

“Such beautiful sounds, my favorite kind of music,” he whispers against my skin.

The soap now long gone, he licks at the water droplets on my chest, collecting them and slurping them into his mouth. He brings his face back up to mine, staring into my eyes and biting his lip.

“Suck me off, baby. Need to see my pretty girl on her knees.”

I drop down while gliding my hands down his wet body. His dick is at my eye level, and I lick a stripe from bottom to top with my hands on his thighs. He shudders his breath and throws his head back before looking back down at me again, reaching behind my head to take out my clip. My hair is cold as it falls down my back after being kept out of the water for so long. He notices and scoots us into a position where the water falls onto me.

I look up through my eyelashes as I place a slow kiss onto his tip, tasting the precum that had beaded up and licking it off my lips. I can’t help but let out a hum at the taste of him, perfectly salty and sweet. I take his head into my mouth and suck lightly, a groan escaping his lips as he finally gets to feel the warmth he’s been longing for.

“You look so beautiful with a cock in your mouth.” He says as he runs his thumb along my cheek. “Take it all baby.”

I grab onto his base and slowly take his length all the way in, my mouth filling with saliva as his head touches the back of my throat. His eyes flutter as he looks down at me, the most lustful but loving look on his face. I bob my head back and forth, taking him all the out and all the way back in, focusing on sucking extra hard on his sensitive tip.

He runs his fingers through my hair before wrapping the ends around his hands, holding my head still and slowly starts rocking his hips back and forth. A low moan sounds through the shower and he bites his lip harshly. I wrap a hand around his base, twisting my hand around him as he fucks into my mouth.

Seeing his face contort in pleasure and hearing the sounds as they fall past his lips has made me soaked, my pussy throbbing with need. I bring my hand down to my core and start rubbing small circles onto my clit, humming around his cock as pleasure starts coursing through my bloodstream. Chris looks down, his eyes widening and his thrusts getting sloppy at the sight.

“Look at that. My gorgeous girl touching herself with my dick in her throat. Fuck..”

I smile around him and continue pleasing myself as he pumps in and out of my mouth, his eyes flickering from my mouth to my hand. His dick starts throbbing and his hips start to betray him, his thrusts becoming uneven and sloppy before he pulls himself out of my mouth. He sighs loudly and rubs his tip against my lips a few times before grabbing my hands and helping me off my knees. He squats down and places a kiss onto each one, rubbing them to ease the ache of being on the hard shower floor.

He stands back up and immediately flips me to face the shower door, placing one hand on my upper back and one at the bottom, pushing my chest against the cold glass. He places a few kisses down my spine and I feel his hard length run back and forth across my ass. I let out a breath and put my hands against the glass, arching up as best as I can so he has better access to me.

“Can’t believe this pussy is all mine,” he whispers as he spreads me open and reveals my dripping core.

His head rubs against my clit before teasing at my entrance, and I instinctively push myself back, desperate to feel him inside of me. Without warning he shoves his hips forward and they slap against me as he bottoms out. We both moan out in pleasure as he fills me up perfectly, not a spot inside of me going untouched. He grips my hips so tightly I can feel his fingers wrapping around my hipbones.

“You like that, pretty girl? The way my cock fits in your pussy like we’re made for each other?” he questions between groans.

“F-fuck, I love it Chris.” I moan out, pressing the side of my face against the shower door.

I’m so turned on that I feel like I could cum just from him talking. He’s doing such filthy things to my body and speaking so dirty but somehow makes it feel so sweet.

His thrusts are deep and fast, hitting every sensitive spot like he’s committed them to memory. My mouth hangs open and I take deep breaths, my lungs filling up with the steam swirling in the air around us. I feel his left hand travel from my hip to my core, gliding across my skin effortlessly over the water. He uses his index and ring finger to search for my clit, pushing the pads of them down with delicious pressure as he continues fucking into me at an ungodly pace. I can’t help but cry out his name, my body becoming weak and my head swimming.

“Keep saying my name, mama. Fuck.. sounds so sweet coming from your mouth.”

“Chris… p-please Chris.. rub me. I need to cum.” I draw out in a whine.

He does just that, his fingers rubbing across my swollen clit as my stomach tightens and my body is begging to give in to my release. He brings his right hand to my breast to grope and massage it while his lips press sweet kisses onto the back of my neck. I feel his dick throbbing and his breath turns into pants and hushed curses.

“Come on baby, let go for me. Let me feel it.” He says in a strained voice as his thrusts become sloppy.

All the pressure that has built up in my core snaps as his words send me into my orgasm. I clench around his cock and ride through the waves of pleasure, repeating his name over and over like a record stuck on repeat. He continues his movements until he knows I’m done, and then he auickly pulls out and flips me around.

“Let me paint that pretty face.”

I drop to my knees and watch as he jerks himself with a tight grip, his mouth hanging open as he stares down at me. The muscles in his stomach contract as he starts pumping faster. He looks like a work of art, water gliding down his skin and hair as he inches himself closer to his climax.

I bat my eyes at him and open my mouth to let my tongue hang out, and he sucks in a breath before groaning and releasing his warm cum onto me. I feel the white strings falling onto my tongue, dripping down my neck and over my breasts, and splashing onto my forehead. He jerks until he’s too sensitive to keep going, and his body relaxes as he leans against the tile wall. His eyes run up and down my body and a smile breaks out across his face.

“Goddamn, I wish I had my camera. You look so fucking gorgeous covered in my cum.”

His words make my cheeks burn and I look away from him, but he hooks a finger under my chin and guides my face back up to meet his gaze.

“Let’s finish this shower before I get left at home and get in trouble,” he laughs and helps me stand.

I nod in agreement and we soap our own bodies down so we can finish quicker. Once we’re all rinsed and clean we hop out and dry off with our towels, stealing kisses every now and again as we get dressed. We quickly grab what we need before we have to go. We race up the stairs to the kitchen where we find Matt and Nick sitting at the table.

“God, about damn time. We’re gonna be so fucking late.” Nick sighs as he stands up from his seat.

“Sorry, slept in. The bed was too comfortable this morning.” Chris partially lies, we actually did sleep in a bit.

He shoots me a smug grin and places a kiss on my forehead as he pulls me into his warm embrace.

“Drive safe, princess. I’ll let you know when we’re done for the day and we can plan a movie night, sound good?” He asks, his voice rumbling in my ear that’s placed against his chest.

“Sounds perfect.”

[xoxoemynn]

For OFMD Tumblr friends who want a S3 and are scared of Twitter

First, no judgment from me. I very much get it. I resisted Twitter for a long time, and even though I'm now a bit more comfortable on it, it's still not my Fandom Home. There are a TON of valid reasons not to be on Twitter, but if you REALLY want to keep OFMD visible right now and help its chances of returning for a third season, Twitter is the best place to do it. Like it or not, Twitter is still the best social media platform for raising awareness and for instant news updates.

Tumblr posts don't make headlines. Topics that have been trending on Twitter do. And if we want this show to come back, we need to make OFMD impossible to ignore.

By now you've probably seen just how close we came to a S3, and if you're like me, you are RAGING and donning your battle jacket. But I get it can be intimidating to get on Twitter for the first time, so I thought I'd address some common anxieties I see. I'll put below a cut because this got a bit long, but I promise it's a quick read.

I don't know what to say! Where do I even start? That's okay! You don't have to create your own tweets (although it's great if you do). Amplifying other people's posts is also important. Go ahead and like/retweet/reply to other people's posts. This may also help you get an idea of what you may like to say in your own tweets.

Hashtags...yes? Yes! Although don't use too many or you may get flagged as a bot. The biggest one that seems to be emerging is #SaveOFMD. Other popular ones are #RenewAsACrew, #RenewOurFlagMeansDeath, and of course, #OFMD and #OurFlagMeansDeath.

Should I just be tagging all the streaming services? Per @renewasacrew, no. It's counterproductive. You'll want to tag one streamer at a time and be specific. Below is an example of a tweet I made the other day -- use specific reasons why that that particular streamer may benefit from picking up OFMD.

I'm scared. People are mean. Yeah, people are mean. But I will say the vibes over at OFMD Twitter are currently the best I've ever seen them. People seem to have united for the greater good and are being overwhelmingly positive and just trying to do whatever we can to save the show. (That said, again, I already had a pretty curated feed, and was very liberal with blocking users/terms I didn't want to see, but I've been able to spend so much more time in the For You tab than I ever have without being jump scared by something.)

But I don't know anyone there! Wouldn't I just be shouting into the void? Not if you use the hashtags! Fans are being really good about following those and engaging with the tweets. Plus, [Stede voice], I'm your friend. I'm xoxoemynn over there as well, I'll follow you back and engage with any of your posts that I see. Plus, what's been REALLY lovely to see is that SO many lurkers have come out of lurkerdom to support the efforts, and they are being welcomed with open arms, so you will not be alone. Again, I am telling you, vibes? Best I've ever seen them.

I can't get sucked into another social media platform, I don't have the time. The beauty here is you don't need to spend a lot of time. I've been on Twitter more in the past week than I have in the entire year I've had an account, and I'm still only on for maybe an hour total the entire day? I open the app, I check a couple accounts, I engage with a handful of posts, and I close the app. It takes all of five minutes. It's an extremely small lift that can have a very big impact.

My bet is on Zaslav expecting us to be upset, and that there may be a day or two of outrage, but then we'd move on. I'm sure right now he's trying to convince everyone that this is a fluke, and that it'll blow over soon. Don't let him win. Keep OFMD in the news. Be loud (but polite) and make Max and other streamers take note of what a passionate, loyal fan base this show has. Make their stocks continue to drop. Make it clear this is NOT just a fluke, it is NOT business as usual. It's a BIG fuck up with lasting consequences.

Twitter, for all its sins, is the best place to do this.

Now let's get our damned show back.

[ironunderstands]

Explaining why I think the notion that “Jade did nothing wrong and if you hate her then you are a misogynist” is incorrect 

Disclaimer: I don’t actually hate Jade, I find her compelling because she seems like the first true villain we might get in the game, and her kit looks really fun, so for that I can respect her. However, to say that she did nothing wrong, or that the people who dislike her are somehow in the wrong or are misogynists is very stupid, which is why I would like to clear up this misconception.

Let’s start with the “she did nothing wrong part” because that’s straight up not true. 

‼️This post will contain leaks of Jade’s eidolons and lc, it will also contain mentions of slavery and sexual violence so be careful‼️ 

I think the scene Jade fans go to point to when trying to argue that she does nothing wrong is the one that depicts her conversation with Aventurine. They state that she “saved him” and that the notions of her being a slave owner/having ties to slavery is incorrect.

However, at the very least the first part of this assumption is wrong, as in no way shape or form did she “save” Aventurine. 

1.Aventurine saved himself. 

He is the one who set up the scheme to get the IPC’s attention, he is the one who killed his master, and he is the one who fought for his freedom. Attributing his hard work to Jade’s “benevolence” erases that, and it pretends as if she’s the one who did all the work, when in reality Aventurine wouldn’t have even had a chance if he didn’t bet on himself.

2.What she offers Aventurine isn’t much better than what his life was before. 

In a sense, Jade just gave Aventurine golden chains, and if she was really interested in saving him, there wouldn’t be a trial, and she would just let him go. “But the scam” the IPC has an uncountable amount of money, they literally control the currency in the galaxy, and are working on taking over the whole universe, a scam ran by one person on one planet will not damage them for long. What Aventurine did really only matters because the IPC made it matter, and even if Jade doesn’t have complete control over all the goings on on the IPC, if she could make it so Aventurine could join them, there’s really no reason she couldn’t just let him free without any strings attached (which is what a normal person would do in this situation, because, well, empathy).

She knows how bad his situation was, as she remarked on how he killed his master, and the average person would struggle to find fault in his behavior at all, let alone have there even be a debate of whether she should let him live or not. 

Like, imagine yourself as Jade for a second, and you are sent to judge this kid (we don’t actually know how old Aven was in that scene, but I’d wager he was a late teenager/young adult) who just escaped slavery but also scammed the organization you are a part of, the organization that is what caused him to be enslaved in the first place (I’ll get into it*). At the very least, if you are like me, you would have a very hard time getting mad at this kid because well who wouldn’t do what he did in his circumstances. That’s why Jade still focusing on her self interests disgusts me and likely disgusts a lot of people who saw this scene, it’s not some equal transaction of sorts, she quite literally has his life on her hands and is toying with it to suit her own ends. 

Now, this situation is complicated, as Aventurine does actually want to join the IPC, but only because he believed that would be the best way he could try and save any remains of his people, the Avgin. We know this for two reasons a) the IPC took everything from him, and he has absolutely no reason why he would want to work for them if they can’t offer him anything b) the first thing Aventurine asks Jade when he becomes a Stoneheart is what happened to the rest of the Avgin, meaning that was likely his goal from the start, as even before becoming enslaved Aventurine had a ton of expectations of being the one to save the Avgin. 

However, from Jade’s perspective, likely

she doesn’t know any of this (unless she can read minds who knows), all she does know is that she holds a position of power over a very brave and intelligent person who owes a debt to the IPC for their crimes against it, and will die if she doesn’t save them. Therefore, she takes advantage of Aventurine’s inferior position, offering him a job not out of the kindness of her heart, but because she see’s his moneymaking potential and knows he can’t decline her offer, since his options are IPC or death. 

This is textbook exploitation, and it honestly disgusts me when people try and paint their relationship to be a mother/son one, when she so clearly views him as nothing more than a tool to achieve her own ends. As someone else puts it, Jade cares for Aventurine like one might care for a gun/weapon, ie she finds it useful and would like it to not get destroyed, but ultimately it’s just a tool that can be replaced. 

Aventurine’s banner name is called “Gilded Imprisonment” for a reason, and Jade offers him nothing more than shiny new chains. 

*sidenote: the IPC aren’t just the ones who broke their promise to help the Avgin, they are also likely the ones who enslaved Aventurine. This is because as Kakavasha, he referred to them as “the men in black/the men in black suits”, aka the IPC. Which is why when first enslaver says he bought him from “the men in black”, he’s also likely referring to the IPC, considering that the exact same phrase in used, in fact, he’s probably mocking the way Aventurine referred to them due to how specific it is. So yeah, I don’t know why people pretend Aventurine is over what the IPC did to him, or even like they saved him, bro probably wants to kill all of them and I fully support him in this endeavor.*

Speaking of treating him like a tool 

3. Dehumanizing Aventurine 

Her first words to him in this scene are pointing out his biggest insecurity.

“What pretty eyes. Tell me, do they shine in the dark?”

Out of context this might not be bad, but oh my god is it horrific in context. The Avgin’s eyes aren’t just a defining feature of theirs, but something they have been sexualized and abused for. Sparkle in her conversation with Aventurine implies that Sigonian’s use their attractive features (including their distinctive eyes) to get people to let down there guard and trick people, and in the same breath she also implies he did that to convince Sunday as well. Aventurine also hides his eyes with his tinted glasses because people automatically judge/discriminate against him for it, so Jade continuing that pattern is gross in my opinion.

Let’s also not forget that Aventurine is Romani coded, and a large proportion of both enslaved Roma in the past and free Roma have experienced sexual violence, as well as being treated as exotic and having other fetishized stereotypes attached to them. Calling his eyes pretty isn’t just some compliment, it’s also an extension of that, especially considering that it’s heavily implied that Aventurine did experience sexual violence when he was enslaved. 

This is what makes Jade IMMEDIATELY going to talking about his eyes creepy as hell to me, and something I dislike her for. 

However, I don’t think she meant it in a sexual manner, rather I think she was trying to get a reaction out of him, as well as demonstrate her position of power over him, which is just, ugh. Like I’m sorry to say this, but if Aventurine was a woman and Jade was a man, Jade would never be beating the p3do allegations for this comment. What do you mean the first words you say to someone involve taunting them for a feature they get sexualized and mistreated over, someone that is likely a minor or a very young adult,  someone that you hold a very clear position of power over. At the very nicest this is insensitive as hell for her to do, but considering she did not at all apologize to his very obviously negative reaction makes me think it was deliberate targeting. 

Also, the next part of that opening.

Yes, Jade is somewhat impressed by Aventurine, but objectively, this phrase doesn’t really come off that way, especially considering her tone in the scene. Seriously, rewatch it, it’s less of her being impressed, and more of her being surprised at him breaking the status quo, one which she doesn’t seem to view negatively. Also, keep in mind that in the CN (aka canon) version, the word is “slave” instead of servant, however I don’t know how the lines are delivered in CN, so she might sound kinder.

Regardless, having this neutral, almost detached perspective on slavery is very uncomfortable, at least to me. Because well, slavery is really bad (shocker), and you can’t really be neutral about these kinds of things. Commenting about how resisting his master would put Aventurine in danger in a clinical and detached manner gives the impression that Jade does not care about the existence of slavery in the slightest, and is perfectly happy with knowing it’s going on and doing nothing about it. Something which gets 10x worse considering the organization she works for is the one doing the slavery, which makes me wonder if she’s seen it before and been like “eh, it’s part of life” 😭

I’m aware dismantling an entire institution is difficult, but her sheer apathy rather than inaction is what I feel is wrong in this scene, as again, a normal person wouldn’t talk about slavery like this. They would probably phrase it like, “resisting your enslaver would put your life in danger, yet you did it anyways”, with none of that neutral tone in there, which kind to implies that Aventurine resisting the person who abuses him is in any way wrong or unusual for a person to do. Honestly I can understand a little bit why people don’t have problems with this line, as understand why people see it as just her doing her job as a judge. However, there’s something so disturbingly off with it that makes me really not like Jade for it, and hopefully I conveyed that well enough, if you have a better way of phrasing it please tell me.

Annnd this is why I say she doesn’t view him as a person. Jade literally tells Aventurine that his name, the remainder of his identity, the one part of his culture and his family and his life, quite literally the only thing he has left is destined to be buried and abandoned. She knows how much it means to him, and she wants him to cast it aside and pick a new identity, as the only thing Jade cares about is what value Aventurine can bring for the IPC. 

Also, she does refer to him as “child” there, so yeah, he likely is a minor or at the very least they have a very significant age gap! Yay! Taking advantage of people significantly younger than you! And if he is somehow close to her age, then well, she views him like a child in comparison to her, which is dehumanizing. There’s really no winning with this one huh 😭

She also refers to him in the same way his old enslaver did! 

Hound and dog are synonyms, so yeah, ew. Narratively, this is meant to be a parallel from Aventurine’s time enslaved to his time now, which demonstrates how nothing really changed, as Jade refers to him in the same way his old master/enslaver did.

4. However, that’s not all to be concerned about for Jade, at least in terms of morality, so let’s look at her eidolons.

Each one of her eidolons questions a good quality, let’s take E3 for an example.

“Honesty?” She questions why people, more specifically she would be sincere, and answers it with “Soon Mortgaged”. 

Now in this context, her honesty is likely seen as being convienent in order to get a deal off, if meant as a noun. As a verb it’s used in a similar manner, with Jade only behaving honestly because it’s part of her duty as a debt collector/contract maker.

Either way, this pattern for her eidolons, of her questioning a good quality then providing a selfish reason for why she exhibits it sets up a vicious implication. It makes it seem like any an all seemingly kind, benevolent behavior from Jade is really just a means to further her goals, making her seem untrustworthy and selfish, like well, a snake, which is a motif prevalent throughout her design. 

Her lightcone description also doesn’t make her seem much better.

Oh how lovely, giving a future to innocent children, I sure do hope this description doesn’t end badly!

“A philanthropist with a hidden agenda, a villain who mortgages souls… She was given various identities by the world, but only she understood the morality behind these actions.”

Jade what are you planning… 

This tells us two things:

1) She engages in philanthropist behavior for reasons we don’t know of yet which is concerning because philanthropy is centered around helping people, why do you have ulterior motives for helping people. What are you planning with those children, Jade?

2)”A villain who mortgages souls” oh! Sure, these two identities were apparently given to her by the world, but like, mortgaging souls??? I’ll get into her biblical (specifically satanic) references next, but like, you need one hell of a good reason to justify buying and selling PEOPLES SOULS. Whatever hidden agenda Jade might have must be like unfathomably good to justify this, because well, this means she owns (or at least helps other people own) people. PEOPLE. 

Jade fucking OWNS HUMAN BEINGS. Unless those people are like a dictator reincarnated or something there’s no good reason to justify owning the essence of someone’s being. It’s straight up evil and I’m glad the game calls her a villain for it. 

5. Satan is that you???

The snake, her contract thing as her skill and in her splash art, her job being “Jade of Credit”, her relationship to withered fruit, and the apple in her splash art, the man at her feet in her splash art, her MORTGAGING SOULS. Look, I’m not a Christian, but like, these are all pretty blatant references to satan who’s, idk, the embodiment of evil. Sure, you could say she’s more like Eve, but she’s not being tricked by the snake, no, in fact, the snake works for her.

Now I don’t literally think Jade is meant to be the devil or something, but she sure as hell seems like she’s meant to be narratively like an agent of Satan/ a demon, which is fascinating. Interestingly, this also paints her interaction with Aventurine as a deal with the devil, which just makes it seem even worse than it already is. 

Well, for now that’s all of Jade’s questionable behavior, and I feel confident enough in saying that at the very least she’s meant to be read as morally grey, so acting like she does no wrong is strange. However, it’s not a crime to like villains at all, and I feel like if Jade’s hardcore defenders just accepted that part of her character, everyone would be way happier, because people do have legitimate reasons to dislike her for the shit she has done, especially rroma people for how she treated Aventurine. 

Not everyone has to like your favorite character, and downplaying and lying about her lore and character because you can’t handle that is annoying as hell and does the character you are defending in the first place a disservice. Jade being a bad person is what makes her interesting, and honestly the idea that women can’t be bad people is misogynistic as well, which is a nice way to transition to the other part of this post:

For the love of god people don’t dislike Jade because of misogyny. Please shut up and stop throwing words around that you clearly don’t understand, as you only end up diminishing actual misogyny. 

I’ve already gone over the valid reasons why people dislike her, so let’s go over all the other stupid shit people bring up in trying to pretend like Jade hate is misogyny.

“But Boothill didn’t get complaints when he was randomly drip marketed, people complaining are only misogynistic Sunday fans!”

Jesus Christ.

Boothill has been leaked for several fucking months prior to his drip marketing, and people had been waiting diligently for when he would finally show up for a while, so obviously they were happy when he did.

He’s like, the most fanservice-y character (in a good way) ever. Boothill is a fucking long-haired cyborg space cowboy outlaw who physically cannot curse and has the cuntiest animations known to mankind, that’s like the most appealing combination of traits known to man. So appealing in fact, that people outside the fandom were making posts about him. Big shocker that the character designed to make everyone love him has everyone love him, act surprised 

Jade’s only scene so far had been her one with Aventurine in 2.1, which as I mentioned prior, has problems. This also doesn’t help that she’s just as slimy in his character stories and their interaction in 2.2, which compared to again, the character designed to be as appealing as possible, isn’t a good look. 

For the love of god Sunday fans have the right to complain. They have also been waiting MONTHS for him, so they would have been disappointed at any character that isn’t Sunday getting marketed, as that means they have to wait even more months for him. He’s highly anticipated, in comparison to Jade, whose had crumbs so far, so of course some people got upset (I didn’t see anything more than disappointment tbh)

People did complain about Boothill’s marketing! Like I know everyone clowned on them, but there were Firefly stans genuinely upset that he got marketed over her, and someone even started a “boycott Boothill’s banner” campaign 😭. It’s just the other reasons compounded why more people complained about Jade than they did about him.

I’m sure there’s some people out there who hate her because they hate women, but like, everyone? Really?

Genuinely, it is so tiring to see misogyny get thrown around like it doesn’t mean anything, and people complaining about misogyny where it doesn’t exist, and ignoring it where it does. Like I’m sorry SOME Jade stans, but yall cannot call this misogyny, then proceed to compare Jade to other female characters like Firefly, and call them flops and trash in comparison to her. THATS unnecessary hating on women for no reason, so don’t be a fucking hypocrite.

Also if a goddamn fictional character is the hill you die on for women’s rights issues, when there’s actual women being genocided right now, please reevaluate your priorities and support the women who actually need your help and assistance right now. Dogging on random Sunday fan #365 for being “misogynistic” because they said they wished he was marketed instead of Jade when there are women being murdered as we speak is dumb as hell. Like yes, these two problems can coexist, but for the love of god pixels are not as important as actual people, and if you really cared about women this would not be the one issue of misogyny you seem to talk about. 

Well, this post was kinda a mess, but I hope you enjoyed it anyways! I’d love to hear your thoughts on the matter, and personally I’m very interested to see where they go with Jade in 2.3. Please keep making her evil and don’t try to hit us with the sad backstory Hoyo, I’m fine if it’s meant to complicate her, but please don’t try and redeem her. Hopefully they go with the Dottore route, but considering they are planning on selling her, they might throw everything interesting down the drain for her which is sad. Let women be evil! And I hope you have a good day :) 

[faiell]

yapping about fics and commenting

sorry to yap but work is boring today and tumblr isn't blocked on my work computer LOL

ok it's abt that post where the writer friend stopped writing because they weren't getting the comments/kudos they wanted.

i'm like. an overeager fandom person. like i cannot get into a fandom without wanting to meet new people and make friends. i love yapping about whatever silly gay idiots i'm hyperfixating over. i'm all about community, and sharing the joy of fandom, and all that fun positive stuff.

i don't post my art for stats but like. that means nothing coming from me tbh. i get stats. i can't accurately predict what would happen if i stopped getting notes on my art, but i would probably keep drawing and keep posting, just maybe less confidently, and less often. i recognize that stats make it much easier and while it’s not my primary motivation, it definitely motivates me to keep posting.

and yet. for years, i never commented on fic. i think i left kudos? and i saw posts like this all the time about how writers were so sad they didn't get comments. and i would feel super guilty about it all the time. but i still wouldn't do it! it sounds stupid, but i would feel pressured. if i liked a fic a lot, it felt even more difficult to comment, because i thought i would have to somehow give back to the author everything that fic gave to me. i wanted to craft the perfect comment that could perfectly encapsulate everything a fic made me feel. and that was way too much pressure so i would just not say anything.

when i got into drarry, i started reading a shit ton of fic. and i still wouldn't comment. i left maybe... 2 or 3 comments, maybe, i think. i can't remember. but i had a lot to say and i WANTED the writers to hear that i had read it and liked it. i just... didn't comment! u know what i did instead? i just fucking straight up DM'd writers on discord and started gushing to them that i liked their fic. somehow i was confident enough to do that, but writing a comment still felt like too much pressure. ?? i don't understand it either, but in my head it felt like a writing assignment, but when I was in DMs it felt more like a conversation and so there wasn't any pressure to make it "good"? idk!! it's very weird.

then i wrote and posted my first complete fic. just a oneshot, nothing special, and i was like. UNREASONABLY nervous about posting it. like. i am a confident person, okay? i was going to make a burner AO3 account and post it under a different name so nobody would know it was me, and then never mention it to anyone except MAYBE super close friends. i got talked out of doing that (thanks i feel a bit silly about considering that now). and then i received my first comment on it, which was basically a two-liner where someone said they liked it and thanked me for writing it.

and i was like. ??...?????? ???????? ...??!!! because i felt like... uncontainable glee? i was freakishly happy. the amount of serotonin those two sentences gave me was definitely unnatural.

is that healthy? idk. will it continue? idk. LOL. i hope so? but idk, some people said it wears off if you write/post for a while. but whatever, the fact that one little comment like that could make my entire day blew my mind. tbh i thought writers were just exaggerating when they said stuff like that.

ever since then i started leaving comments! that shit's easy! like what was i overthinking for? i'm such a fucking tryhard! all i gotta say is that i liked it, and even the bare minimum can bring lots of joy to someone.

so basically what im trying to say is that negative reinforcement doesn't do shit!! it just makes people feel bad about themselves. that post is nasty for guilt-tripping readers like that, and i bet you it's going to have the opposite effect (or no effect tbh).

YAPPING FINISHED. for now.

[centrally-unplanned]

Watching Tantacrul's analysis of "Facebook and its discontents", as it were, which is a good video even if I disagree with a bunch of it (I don't assign as much credence to the "social media is causing mental health crises" arguments, even if I am open to them, and am far more skeptical of the case of the "misinformation" proponents). What I do think is valuable is that Tantacrul was himself a large facebook user - not only professionally as a musician and game designer, but personally as one of those people who adopted it in his mid-20's right when it launched. He had the complete prelapsarian experience that Facebook, back when it was a tool and not a platform, was supposed to deliver; getting connected to a bunch of old friends, catching up, and sharing things from your personal life (and even effort posts; people did that on FB back then). While surely people do still have that experience on Facebook, it is a footnote of what it does today - few users are there for that anymore.

What strikes me is that there was something inevitable to the decline of that as a service - it relied sharply on momentum and a specific era. Having everyone join Facebook at the same time created a ton of activity and the easy establishment of community - everyone is here and online all in one place, catching up, so lets share things. But while the idea that one tool would Win The Future and be the ur-platform for everything is ofc the dream of every tech CEO, it isn't the dream of the user. "Everyone" made a Facebook in the late 2000's and at least gave the site a shot, so seeing dozens of friendly faces new and old was possible. But for most users it didn't really stick - I gave up on it in days myself, for others it was months, maybe it was a few years but it "getting old" is baked in. Not because the platform Got Worse, but because look, I can text my friends; I don't care anymore about posting a photo for 100+ people to see. The dirty secret of community everywhere is that if it isn't structural, it is temporary; it doesn't inherently generate endless engagement. Over time, you grow bored.

But you know what does generate endless engagement??

The second pillar of the Early Facebook Experience was the era - the internet was young, and "randos fooling around" was the peak of content. Most people weren't bloggers (the fools), most people weren't autistic enough to troll the dregs of Newgrounds for parody Evangelion dating sims (the absolute fools) - the internet just didn't have that much to do. Which meant the content your friends were posting to their facebook wall was as good as anything, right? Their Hot Take on the end of the Second Intifada ("this is a real opportunity for peace in the region") seemed worthy of several dozen back-and-forth debates in the comments. What this model could not anticipate is that its own success in generating online revenue streams meant that professionals would rise to meet the demand of the attention economy, far better than your friends could. Obviously Facebook-as-platform was a perfectly viable place to Share Content, but you do enough of that and someone's graduation photos seem a bit pedestrian in comparison. And again you can just text your friends - Facebook just isn't a good enough medium for all this.

I do think when people look at "the history of website X", there tends to be a lot of focus on the corporate management as the locus for change - the "pivot to video" for ad revenue or whatever. And certainly that is part of the story - I bet Facebook could have, if it had no ambition, stayed a site for people to see what their friends were up to. But that story is the story of website with declining engagement, with less people signing up new accounts as they are busy already on Tiktok, and active users dialing in less than they did. Maybe still better than the current status quo? Possibly, that isn't a debate I am interested in here. Just saying that change is inevitable in these kinds of places.

[starry-bi-sky]

Stillborn? No, still born au -- Dani Phantom! Clone girl herself. :]

She can't exist in this au. And it's not that I don't want to add her -- although I'll be blunt, I don't, I'll be the first to admit that I think she's more often than not nothing more than a narrative deadweight used to prop up Danny and I don't like adding characters as props -- but her existence quite literally goes against and muddies the Vlad and Danny dynamic I have for this au. Ellie's existence in canon itself states that she was created -- and Danny's other clones too -- because Vlad gave up on trying to convert him to his side and decided to just make a son instead.

Something that just, doesn't happen in the stillborn-still born au. See, for folks who are only just hearing about this au or didn't see my post about Vlad in this au, he and Danny have a complicated love-hate relationship where they mutually want to adopt each other, but their morals and way of doing things -- mainly Vlad's insistence on getting revenge against the Fentons -- gets in the way of them being able to do that in full.

Vlad knows Danny wants him to adopt him, and is only fighting him on it because he refuses to let Vlad kill the Fentons for essentially killing the both of them. He's succeed in 50% of his goal. Canon Vlad never even made it to 1%. With that in mind, stillborn Vlad has no reason and sees no reason to clone Danny, he has his son. He just needs to convince him to let him avenge them both.

Dani simply has no place in the stillborn-still born au. And in fact, if Vlad did decide to clone Danny -- for whatever reason, -- it would damage his relationship with Danny damn near beyond repair. That's because Danny would view it the same way he views Damian's existence; as a replacement for himself. He would become beyond furious and hurt, and not for the typical 'I can't believe you cloned me, you creep!' reason, but for a 'I can't believe you cloned me, you said I was your son!' reason.

I am not pulling any punches here when I say Danny wants Vlad to be his dad just as much as Vlad wants Danny to be his son, there's just a lot of factors getting in the way. They are, as the french say, ✨mentally unwell.✨ Danny has a ton of abandonment and trust issues due to his experiences in foster care. He would immediately become jealous, insecure, and incredibly furious and hurt. He'd despise her on principal and want nothing to do with her, or Vlad for that matter. He'd just fucking haaate her. It's not her fault she was made but Danny doesn't really care, he's lashing out and pushing people away because he's been betrayed yet again.

The only way they could get along or for Danny to actually like her in any capacity would be if it was his idea to clone himself. Which is like, kinda obvious but considering most clone plots tend to be non-consensual it's kinda gotta be said. He has to have a hand in creating her, that's the only way I can see him liking her in any way. Or if someone other than Vlad created her. If Vlad clones him though, all bets are off the table and he'll despise her.

TL;DR: Dani can't exist in this au because she goes against the narrative I've got for the two most fucked up half-dead could-be-father-son duo in existence, but if she did exist Danny would despise her.

[steddiealltheway]

!!!!! Tw: faked suicide not by Steve or Eddie. There are ⚠️⚠️⚠️ before and after the most graphic parts which can be skipped without needing too much context. I tried to be vague but it can still be triggering. !!!!! (Thank you everyone tagging it as such)

A sort of different type of TikTok Modern AU…

Eddie Munson is a famous rockstar and honestly doesn’t post much on TikTok, but he occasionally finds himself scrolling though the app which is how he finds Steve.

He’s gorgeous. Exactly Eddie’s type with luscious, gravity defying hair, a sharp jaw, pretty lips, and he bets if he had a closer look, Steve would have the most charming eyes. It’s a shame the camera is so far away from him, and Eddie almost wonders why until Billy Hargrove is in the shot.

Eddie’s stomach sours at the sight of the man. Yes, he’s attractive, even Eddie could admit that, but there was something about him that made Eddie feel uncomfortable. Plus, there were a few scandals surrounding the tiktoker regarding previous racist Tweets and comments which he has responded to with a thrust trap to “Nobody’s Perfect” by Miley Cyrus / Hannah Montana.

So yeah. Eddie didn’t particularly like him and the stuff he got away with just because he’s hot.

He tunes back into the video which has him holding his finger to his lips, and Eddie is already rolling his eyes. The caption says, “Pranking my boyfriend, Steve 🤣😱” and Eddie can already tell it has to be fake with all the dramatics that Steve just happens to not see.

But then Billy carefully sneaks behind the couch where Steve is sitting and dumps a bucket full of water and ice onto him which has the man yelling and standing up in shock. He stands still for a minute and then yells, “Why the fuck would you do that, Billy??”

The tone and overall reaction has Eddie actually wonder if the video is fake or if Steve is just a really good actor. But he watches it again and notices that the man doesn’t look toward the camera once and something about that makes him feel really uneasy.

Eddie has to reason with himself, if the man is dating Billy Hargrove then he must not be a great person, and maybe he deserved the bucket of ice water. But Eddie still closes out of the app and tries his best not to think about it.

-:-:-:-:-:-

He opens the app a few days later, having forgotten about the whole incident until he comes across another video by Billy and the word “prank” in his caption catches Eddie’s eye. He sighs wondering why it’s on his for you page, but right before he swipes past it, he catches the gist of the prank.

Billy fills a syringe with mayonnaise and injects it into a donut, and then it cuts to him giving it to Steve from a camera that once again seems to be hidden although Billy keeps glancing at it with a smirk on his face and evil in his eyes. Steve, on the other hand, doesn’t glance toward the camera, but his face lights up with glee when he’s handed the donut. “You got this for me?” He asks in an awe filled tone as if the donut means the world to him.

“Yeah, why don’t you take a big ol’ bite of it for me?” Billy asks, voice low. Eddie watches as Steve shifts uncomfortably and puts the donut down.

“This isn’t another prank, is it? You know I don’t like them,” Steve says which honestly surprises Eddie. His tone is entirely genuine, and he feels like he’s peering in on a private moment.

“Of course not baby. Told you I’d stop,” Billy replies with a big smile.

Eddie can’t help but click on the caption: “Simple prank makes boyfriend storm out!” With a shit ton of hashtags that Eddie doesn’t bother reading.

Sure enough, Steve bites into the donut and immediately spits it out. He doesn’t say a word, just shakes his head and storms out of room.

Billy laughs loudly, “Oh, don’t be like that, babe! You know that was funny as shit!”

Eddie opens the comments, and is surprised to find people actually defending the prank. There are some people who comment shit like, “date me instead! I would never get mad at your pranks 🥵”

There’s only one comment that says, “Don’t really find this funny.” But it’s swarmed with hate comments from Billy’s fans that has Eddie scoffing as he scrolls onto the next video. He watches for a few seconds before scrolling back up when he realizes something. He looks at the date of the TikTok and realizes it was posted the previous month which means…

Eddie sighs realizing that him looking through Billy’s videos will only give him more attention and views, but he needs to know how long this has been going on for. And he really needs to find out if Steve is in on any of it or at least had gotten Billy back.

He begrudgingly clicks on Billy’s profile and scrolls through. He finds several videos with the thumbnail being of Steve mid reaction to a prank, and Eddie notices that every time, the camera is far away, and there doesn’t seem to be a single video of him up close.

The whole thing doesn’t feel right to Eddie. But what can he do about it? It’s not like he can report the videos. He could simply just block Billy and try to forget it all.

He scrolls back to the top and accidentally refreshes the page. He’s about to block him when he notices a new video pop up, where Steve looks like he’s in the middle of a panic attack. Eddie immediately presses on it.

⚠️⚠️⚠️

Billy smiles at the camera, no shirt in sight as he laughs, “This is my biggest prank yet. Steve should be home in less than a minute. And look,” he holds up his phone and shows a bathtub filled with red water that almost looks like blood.

Eddie’s shaky hand covers his mouth. He wouldn’t.

Billy laughs and continues, “I sent him a text that says ‘I’m sorry’ and a picture of an empty pill bottle, and he’s been texting me non stop for the past few minutes. Shit, he’s on his way now so it’s time for me to hide my phone and make this look as real as possible.”

Eddie watches as Billy puts his phone on a shelf and seemingly stacks towels up to cover his phone and hold it in place. He looks away when Billy takes out a bottle of fake blood and stages a suicide. He practically shakes with anger. Steve has to be in on this. He has to just be a good actor.

Eddie’s stomach drops when he hears Steve yelling Billy’s name rushing through the house. He bursts through the door and falls against the wall in shock. “Tell me this is a damn prank Billy. Billy…” he gets closer and shakes him. “Billy!” He yells shaking. “Shit. Shit. No no no. Fuck. What the fuck…”

Steve sits next to the tub and puts his head in his hands having a panic attack. Billy’s eyes open and he winks at the camera before grabbing Steve’s shoulders and yelling, “Boo.” He starts cackling loudly as Steve confusedly looks around trying to catch his breath. “I got you so good!” Billy yells through laughter.

Steve shakily gets up, tears streaming down his face and runs. Billy gets out of the tub and makes his way to his phone. “Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to him later,” he says with a wink before the video ends.

⚠️⚠️⚠️

Eddie sits as the video reloops. He’s shaking with anger. He doesn’t think as he duets the video and mutes the other audio. “This is the most fucked up thing I’ve ever seen. These ‘couple pranks’ are stupid enough and not funny, but to fake a suicide and call it a joke… you have to be an extra type of fucked up asshole. There aren’t enough words to describe how evil of a human being you have to be to do something like this to someone you love. I don’t care if this is staged or not. This is not okay. And fuck you.” Eddie quickly censors Billy’s half of the video with a note of “watch at your own risk.” He doesn’t care if his manager is pissed or if his account is filled with Billy’s fans hating on him or whatever. He presses the post button and turns off his phone. He needs fresh air.

He grabs his keys, a hat, and sunglasses, and makes his way out of his apartment. Hopefully the damn paparazzi back the fuck off today. He makes it down his street and walks quickly, fuming with anger. He weaves in and out of people and curses the busy LA streets.

He turns the corner and rams right into someone walking at an equally fast rate. He holds onto the stranger to steady himself and keep them up. “Sorry,” the man chokes out and Eddie is about to brush it off when he realizes he recognizes him.

“Steve?” He asks. He knew Billy lived in Los Angeles but he didn’t know he lived so close. The thought makes him kind of sick to his stomach. He thinks he might punch him if he ever saw him in person.

Steve wipes at his face and narrows his eyes at Eddie. “Sorry, do I know you?”

Eddie glances around before lifting up his sunglasses and hat, waiting for Steve to recognize him enough to gain his trust. Instead, Steve just stares at him blankly.

Eddie’s heart races. This has never really happened to him. He puts on the hat and sunglasses sheepishly. “Uh, I’m Eddie. I know you from Billy’s TikToks.”

Steve just tilts his head in confusion. His eyes are red and puffy. He wonders if Billy posted the video so soon after his prank and if Steve is currently in the aftermath of it. “Um,” Steve says and clears his throat, “Was I in the background or something? He told me I wasn’t in his TikToks.”

Eddie’s heart drops. He opens his phone and goes to Billy’s TikTok, ignoring the way his own TikTok is blowing up. He turns his phone to Steve and picks a less traumatizing prank to show him.

Steve grabs his phone and his eyes widen. A look of confusion crosses over his face that slowly turns into realization and numbness. “He’s been using me for views after promising he wouldn’t, isn’t he? I even asked if the pranks were somehow stupid content but he said they weren’t. He…” he trails off and shakes his head. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be unloading all of this onto you.”

Eddie shakes his head. “No, no. It’s okay. I’m sorry that I told you.”

He watches as Steve numbly nods and scrolls presumedly through Billy’s profile. He looks down at the screen and back at Eddie. “Is this you?” Steve asks hesitantly as he turns the phone back to him.

Eddie confusedly looks at his phone and sees that Billy has apparently replied to his TikTok already. Then, to his left, he hears a bit of commotion and sees some cameras flashing. Fuck. “Do you trust me?” Eddie asks.

Steve looks at his phone and back at Eddie.

Yeah, that’s a lot to ask of him. “Okay, how about this? You keep my phone, and we run back to my apartment around the corner and talk in private before we both end up in shitty magazines?”

Steve tilts his head and glances toward where a few people with cameras make their way to them yelling, “Eddie! Eddie Munson!”

“You’re not a famous serial killer or something, right?”

“Musician,” Eddie says and holds out his hand. “One who hates Billy Hargrove.”

Steve looks down at his hand and takes it running alongside Eddie who tries not to think about the stories that might come out of this. Gosh, he thought his biggest scandal would be when he came out as gay.

He makes his way back to his apartment telling his doorman, “Paparazzi! He’s with me!”

Hopper just nods in response and opens the door quickly. Eddie sighs in relief when he makes it through and to the elevator. Steve looks at him and asks, “How offended are you that I don’t know you?”

Eddie laughs. “Mildly, but it’s a relief really.” He realizes that isn’t the biggest concern in the moment and changes the subject. “Are you okay?”

Steve sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He opens his mouth but the elevator dings, and Steve almost looks relieved. Eddie doesn’t press it as he leads him to his apartment. “Make yourself at home. Do you want water, coffee, tea, soda, or anything?”

Steve numbly shakes his head, so Eddie grabs two bottles of water and two cokes from his fridge. He puts them down on his coffee table and sits on the couch, watching as Steve kind of hovers in his living room with his arms crossed. “I won’t bite, and I certainly won’t pressure you to do anything. But you can sit on the couch if you like.”

Steve eyes him and asks timidly, “You’re not in on anything with Billy, right?”

It breaks his heart seeing and hearing how on edge these pranks have made Steve. “Fuck no. I promise on my guitar I have never had anything to do with Billy and I never will. Well… unless you count me calling him out on his shit on TikTok.”

The words seem to get through to Steve who sits down on the couch next to Eddie while keeping his distance. “So… that’s why you were on his TikTok.”

Eddie’s heart hammers. He nearly forgot that Billy had apparently dueted his own video. “Yeah, but it has to be really new because I only posted mine literally a minute before I ran into you.”

Steve looks down at Eddie’s phone still in his hands. “Why?”

“Why what?” Eddie asks genuinely confused.

“Why did you call him out?” Steve asks, not sounding angry just… curious.

Eddie shifts and play with a string on one of the rips of his jeans. “His most recent video with the faked suicide. That wasn’t fucking cool, man. None of the pranks he’s done have been okay. And I’m sorry that you were put through them - especially this last one.”

Steve’s face turns almost white. “He posted that? Was I… was I in it? Like… my entire breakdown was…” he trials off as Eddie slowly nods. “Fuck,” Steve says burying his face in his hands. Eddie is about to apologize or go on a rant about how much he hates Billy Hargrove when Steve asks, “Can I see the video you made?”

Eddie’s cheek flush red, but he replies, “Yeah, uh, I don’t exactly remember what I said because I kind of went into a fit of rage and posted whatever came to mind. But yeah, my password is 051599.”

Steve types the password into his phone, and stares at the screen blankly. He looks at Eddie and asks, “I’m not on social media… ever so… could you show me?”

Eddie nods and slides over until he’s a few inches away from the beautiful man, and he does his best to try not to think too hard about how attractive he finds him as he goes to his profile and presses on his recent video. His nose scrunches up at the sound of his own voice, but he doesn’t disagree with anything he said. Billy Hargrove is a dick.

“Can I see the comments?” Steve asks. Eddie nods and clicks on them.

“Woah,” Eddie can’t help but say as he sees blue checkmark after blue checkmark. The top comments are from @ ronancetheromance with the couple saying: “Only an absolutely vile person is capable of such a fucked up prank. #SaveSteve”. Another from @ willthewise: “remember to comment on here instead of the original video so it can get less attention!! #savesteve”. Several of the rest of the streamers who call themselves “The Party” reply to Will’s with the hashtag “SaveSteve”.

“Who are these people?” Steve asks as he scrolls through the comments. He comes across one from @ billyfan4everandalways saying: “Watch Billy’s new video and stop being so quick to judge!!”

Eddie clicks on the replies, and the top liked one - having more likes than the original comment - is from @ ericasinclair: “that ugly mullet man’s explanation is bullshit and everyone knows it. let Steve talk for himself or I’m not buying it. #SaveSteve #CancelBilly”

Eddie nearly follows the girl, but realizes that Steve had asked a question. “Most of them I don’t know personally honestly.”

“Then why are they defending me? I’m nobody,” Steve says as if it’s a common fact.

Eddie turns off his phone and puts it down, properly facing Steve. “I know I don’t know you well, but you are not nobody. And these people are defending you not only because Billy is a dick, but this prank stuff is abusive and shouldn’t be normalized especially with the following he has. Nobody should go through that.”

Steve turns slightly red and looks away before asking, “Can we watch his reply?”

Eddie shudders a bit at the thought, but turns on his phone and goes to his page. “Are you sure? I haven’t seen it yet either, and I’m a little prone to getting pissed at him.”

“I’m sure,” Steve says and even reaches over to open the video.

Billy still has fake blood on him and is scrubbing it off with an angry look on his face. He looks at the camera every so often, and it’s clear that he’s staring at himself in a mirror. What a fucking asshole. “These pranks are harmless, and even my boyfriend would agree with that. He enjoys them and he makes sure to show me how much once the cameras stop rolling and his shock has died off,” Billy says so with a smirk on his face that sends chills down Eddie’s body. “So, stop making assumptions about me and my boyfriend and keep making shitty music instead asshole.” The video ends with him flipping off the camera.

“Charming,” Eddie comments, pausing the video so it doesn’t endlessly loop, and turns to see Steve’s reaction. He runs a hand through his hair and shakes his head.

“He’s lying. I’ve been begging him to stop for weeks. Even slept on the couch in protest. But that last one was the last straw. I just… don’t know where to go,” Steve sits back against the couch and mumbles, “Fuck.”

Eddie shifts and looks at him. “Do you have any friends or family that could take you in?”

Steve laughs humorlessly. “My parent disowned me when they found out I was dating Billy. Didn’t want a bi son ruining the family image. I had to move in with Billy, and he used to be sweet really. Well… I thought he was for the first three months. When his TikTok career took off he moved to LA, and I felt like I had no choice but to go with him. I grew apart from the few friends I had before the move, and I was just stuck with Billy here. And I… I don’t know,” Steve sighs and puts his head in his hands. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to dump all of this on you. I just… haven’t really had anyone to talk to.” The man lifts his head, his eyes are tired and filled with unshed tears. He’s gorgeous really, but that’s the last thing Eddie needs to be thinking about.

Eddie takes a moment to consider things. Steve seems like a good guy. He has plenty of extra room in his too big apartment and money to spare that he doesn’t know what to do with. Honestly, he’s not meant for this lifestyle and never has been. He’s happy that his uncle Wayne is retired and living comfortably off his too big income, but it’s lonelier than he imagined it to be.

And with that thought Eddie tells Steve, “Then live here for a while. No pranks. I won’t use you for clout or whatever. I have a guest bedroom with its own private bathroom, and I usually never have visitors. And I hate parties, so you don’t have to worry about that either. I may be writing songs in the middle of the night, but my music room is fairly soundproof. And trust me, I would appreciate the company or feeling like my money is going toward something important.”

Steve stands up and shakes his head. “It’s okay, man. I don’t want your charity. You’ve already done enough.”

Eddie stays on the couch and says, “Please, Steve, stay a week or just a few days. If you hate it here, I’ll help you get on your way. But trust me when I say you’ll help me too. It’s…” he sighs and runs a hand over his face, “It’s lonely in LA.” He cringes as he quotes the title of his favorite song that he’s written. It’s also his least popular one, but it’s the most honest thing on any of his albums.

“Reminds me of that song,” Steve says with a small smile.

Eddie’s head snaps up. “You know it?”

Steve hums the chorus of Eddie’s song and Eddie joins in. Steve stops to ask, “You know it, too?”

Eddie huffs a laugh. “I wrote it.”

Steve looks at him for a few moments longer with a combination of shock and hesitation. Then he surprises Eddie by asking, “You really wouldn’t mind if I stayed?”

“Not at all. Unless you ended up doing something really drastic like trying to murder me.”

Steve snorts, and Eddie finds it endearing. He tries to shake the feeling away. He can not fall for this man when he’s a guest in his house and especially not after everything he’s been through. But then Steve gives him a real smile and holds out his hand saying, “It’s a deal.”

And when Eddie takes his hand and feels how warm and nice it feels in his, half of him wants to argue that it’s just because it’s been a while since he’s actually had a genuine conversation with another person. But the other half is quick to accept that he’s absolutely fucked when it comes to this stranger that he feels like he’s inevitably going to fall in love with.

[oakenshieldbaggins]

xedgin fic rec list

so because i binge read a ton of fics these last two months, i thought why not make a rec list if it can help people find out great fics.

i just wanted to say i came across so many good fics, like comparing to other fandoms i find the overall quality to be quite high. so what i'm trying to say is you guys are really talented and we're lucky to have you in this fandom. and thank you for sharing your work.

now the recs:

Post-Movie:

Three words everybody knows by violet_pencil

Speaking the words of an oath isn't what makes you a good paladin, and knowing how to tell lies is only part of what makes a great con man. Where do they find common ground? Well, turns out they both know how to commit to the bit.

Sunlight is a Kind of Burning by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

Ed's excited to get his life back on track in the wake of saving Neverwinter. He's less excited at how a certain paladin keeps popping up everywhere he goes. Except for how he's starting to miss the guy when he's not around. Yeah, let's not think about that too hard.

a ballad from a reverie by forsworn

On a cold evening, the party stop to drink at a crowded tavern. Xenk tries to ignore the way his chest tightens when Edgin squeezes close to him. But that gets much harder when the tavern's bard starts singing a love song. About a paladin. And Edgin seems to recognise it…

tys hard to be a seinte in the cytie by indigostohelit

“The Material Planes are not realms of punishment,” said Xenk. “The gods no more deny us the warmth of physical pleasure than they would the warmth of the sun. They only warn us, through each, of the dangers that lie in excess.” “…Huh,” said Ed again, and, lacking further retort, grabbed up the new tankard and swigged deeply. Then he spat it across the bar. “This is water, though,” said Xenk peacefully. “You are going to have a hangover in the morning.”

Universal Glue by Korwwa

Edgin and Xenk get stuck in a glue trap. The close-quarters situation forces Edgin to decide if succumbing to the charms of certain overpowered paladin is more likely to ruin, or elevate, the plan of his life.

Polyphonic by Geese_In_Flight

Ed can’t stand Xenk. Xenk keeps showing up anyway. It’s not entirely clear how that became everyone else’s problem.

Muses lost and found anew by Mikhail

Edgin Darvis never considered himself to be a hero. Of course, he was full of dreams and ideals back when he was still young. He wanted to save the world. But the world, as it turned out, didn’t really want to be saved. Instead, it barged into Edgin’s life uninvited and made him a widower, a thief, and an escaped convict. As he was looking back at his life and naivete, he couldn’t feel but contempt and bitterness. That is until he crossed paths with Xenk Yendar, a paladin whose sword was only nearly as strong as his righteousness. Confronted with Xenk’s tragic past, the bard realized they were both touched by the same evil. Before he could dwell on some uncomfortable truths, however, Xenk disappeared from his life just as suddenly as he first appeared. When they meet for the second time, it’s clear the two of them have much more in common than they first thought. Well, it’s clear to everyone except for them. The question is, are they going to realize this before it’s too late?

in the absence of truth by floralprintshark

Five times Ed says that he hates Xenk and one time he doesn't.

Perception Check (Roll for Romance) by kaydeefalls

"I bet Xenk fucks like a metronome, too. You know." Holga makes a highly suggestive, repetitive gesture. "In, out. In, out. No variation. Same exact rhythm every time. Boring." Edgin stares at her, torn between horror and fascination. "You've really thought about this, huh?" (So has he. Unfortunately.)

give me two damn minutes (and I'll be fine) by PH03N1X_360

Xenk Yendar is a hero. It’s his job, his identity, his [life]. It comes as easily as breathing. Saving children, fighting hordes of undead, it’s always come naturally to him. As each new challenge arises, people look to him to protect them. The warmth of their gazes never fail to fill him with pride. No matter how many scars he acquires, how many nights the horrors of his past rouse him from sleep, or how many people he fails to save in the process, it is always worth the price. Yet sometimes, when the darkness around him feels too oppressive and tight bandages make his bones ache, he wonders how much more he can take before he cracks under the pressure. Or: Xenk sees the Beckoning Death spell from afar. Even upon realizing the party took care of it, it still fucks him over severely... not that he would show it. Edgin knows a mask when he sees one.

Falling For The First Time by Powderpuff

In retrospect, falling in love with Edgin was inevitable. There was no recourse for Xenk; no guild nor court to appeal to, and even Ilmater could not return his property to him, nor Ed himself; for you cannot return something you do not know you have.

O happy dagger! This is thy sheath by Kabbal (Aledane)

"Ed wants to bash his face in with his lute, just to shatter that perfect, flawless skin, see if there’s flesh and blood running under that pristine marble. He wants to flee to the end of the world, to never be reminded of the existence of a being who seems to never have failed at anything, ever. He also wants to crush his lips against his, cling to that steady neck and feel the weight of all that perfection over him, spearing him like it could make him holy‒ Hm. Strange thought to have. Let’s forget it ever existed."

Affection and Love by AkataLily

Edgin is affectionate towards Xenk. Not love, affectionate, because those are two very different things! Xenk is oblivious and uninterested, that is, until Edgin fucks up and the cat is suddenly out of the bag. Things get akward, then they get complicated, but eventually, we all have to admit what goes on in our hearts.

Winning Prizes for Rotten Judgment by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

In which Ed admits he's in love with Xenk, woos Xenk, and sleeps with Xenk, all in completely the wrong order. To be fair, it's only half his fault.

keystone by weatheredlaw

key·stone noun | a central stone at the summit of an arch, locking the pieces together. or: edgin dies, but there's magic for that. holga and xenk make good on a thirty-five year old favor to bring him back from the other side.

So Deep As the Love I'm In by Geese_In_Flight

Holga takes a step forward and claps Ed on the shoulder sympathetically, which is a terrible sign. “Swept you right off your feet, did he?” she asks, with a grin. Five times Xenk courted Ed, and one time Ed decided to take matters into his own hands.

the weight of fingers pressing deep by forsworn

When Xenk slips his fingers into Edgin's mouth during sex, they're both surprised by how good it feels.

you'll find us in the meadowland by audenrain

He was standing at Xenk’s desk, tucked into the corner and lined by shelves stacked with holy texts. Not his most valuable, of course - he wouldn’t be so careless as to keep the most precious of his collection here - but any one of them would feed a hungry man for a few days, at least. And yet this man wasn’t hungry, and he was no ordinary thief. Xenk judged this not only by the strong slope of his shoulders and broad back and the fine weave of his coat but also by the fact that he had recently been awarded the highest honours the Lord of Neverwinter could bestow. No, Edgin could want for nothing; even he could not have spent his rewards so quickly. There was only one explanation. This was an affliction of the soul.

To Touch The Divine by New1Romantic

Xenk asks for Edgin's help to retrieve an evil artefact from a cult. The fact that the cult is definitely just a front for the elite of Waterdeep to have kinky sex is, presumably, just happenstance.

Freely given (Wanted) by sb_essebi

Ed can’t. He can’t anymore. Can’t take the fervour in Xenk’s words, the shine in his eyes, the way the light of the sunset plays across his skin. He’s just so beautiful at sunset, Xenk. He is. To the point of unfairness, to the point it makes Ed almost angry, makes him want to cry, to scream. Ed kisses him. Or: Ed steals a kiss. Xenk shows him why he needn't have.

Edgin Needs to Get Laid and Edgin Gets Laid by Isoltan

There was a pause. "And that's when you started the one night stands," Holga said, only a hint of a question in her voice. Xenk raised his tankard in her direction and took a long swig. "You have sexual desire?" Simon asked. Doric turned to him and exploded, "Jesus, do you ever think before you speak?" "Tell the truth, you thought he was celibate too. Edgin sure did!" Simon said, gesturing to Edgin. "Hey, leave me out of this," Edgin said. "Exactly!" Simon continued. "Tell me, out of the two of them, you'd have pegged Edgin as the celibate and XENK as the whore!" -----------‐ Very loose f*ck-or-die fic. Basically, Edgin's magic needs to improve and the group decides he needs to get laid. But he reveals he's demi and can only be intimate with people he trusts. This was meant to be a one-off but I got caught up with the group's banter.

this distance between us by forsworn

Xenk and Edgin have to share a bed. It’s not even a big bed. The perfect time for Xenk to have a nightmare…

Origin Point series by Neyiea

“It wasn’t a risk. I knew that if I jumped you would catch me.” Xenk’s pinched expression becomes thoughtful, then turns serious. “I see,” he intones solemnly. “I am honored to have earned your trust.”

close to the skin by forsworn

Edgin's going undercover; Xenk's determined to make him look respectable. But Edgin finds submitting to a flat-razor shaving at those steady hands to be far more intense than he expected.

Solitary Burdens by cupiscent

Edgin's wife died years ago, but he's only just now letting go. He can't talk about it with any of the others, but Xenk - aggravatingly - understands. Perhaps neither of them need to carry these burdens alone.

in for a silver by weatheredlaw

Edgin was, at the very least, two things: a great kisser, and a phenomenal liar. or: xenk gets hit by something weird in the jungle. edgin lends a hand.

Canon Divergence (happens during the movie):

We Are So (Not) Breaking Up by murdertrashbabyrat

Edgin isn’t mad because of the idea of a kind Thayan, he’s mad because it’s Xenk Yendar his lightly insufferable not-ex. They didn’t break up because they were never together thank you very much Holga, so Xenk is his…his something that isn’t his anymore. It’s fine he’s not dwelling on it he has to get his wife back and stop thinking about the man he’s been sharing a bed with for years. Denial is a hell of a drug OR they are exes when they meet up again in the movie

AUs:

A Cherry When It's Blooming by Geese_In_Flight

Lord Yendar, once a paladin of Ilmater, has been called back to Waterdeep in the aftermath of his father’s death. Upon his arrival, he discovers he must reckon with an untrustworthy executor, an estate in shambles, and a wholly unexpected stipulation in his father’s will. Edgin Darvis is trying to find the one big score that will let him build back a life that went off the rails years ago. When he hears the rumors that a young and inexperienced Lord Yendar has come back to town, he knows just what he has to do.

Romance in the time of LoveChat by cicia3

What's worse than being a loser writer reduced to releasing third-rate romance novels for Forge Publishing? Being an uninspired writer with three months' back rent to pay. Driven by desperation, Edgin, a single father who's also perhaps juuust a tad too much anchored in the past, signs up on the nation's largest dating site. The goal? To find a character unique enough to inspire him for his new novel. And then Xenk Yendar shows up.

[themoodyestj]

I know you don’t like Danneel but have you ever thought that maybe just maybe Jensen sees something in Danneel that you don’t?

Anon... sigh

I bet he sees a lot of her that I dont... The bane of his existence, his prison keeper... But that's not the point.

The true point is, unlike many people in this fandom... I dont live up Jensen's butt. And I have a working brain.

Even if Danneel was the moon and the stars for Jensen (which she is not, btw) I would still criticize her, because she represents everything I despise in a woman. She never did anything of valuable for herself, never worked to evolve a single day in her life, relied only in sitting and looking pretty, and not even when she was sassy to "defend her man's honor" she did a good job. She does absolutely nothing of value, not even her so called "charity" and then brandishes the flag of "enpowered women" like if having a vagina automatically puts her in that category.

As someone who constantly works towards betterment and understands how hard it is for a woman to rise in a mostly men led world, I can tell you she does not belong there. Acting like a mean girl or doing performative charity work doesnt cut it. So even if Jensen saw a ton of value in her (which would be delusional, because, really, what is there to see?) I would still consider her shallow, vapid, empty. I would still mock her for doing childish tiktoks instead of actually get her hands dirty and get some work done to launch her project. I would still criticize her for so easily stabbing the knife is Jensen's back and supporting a man that caused him so much grief (JUST TO GET ATTENTION ON HER). For reinforcing the bars of the prison he so desperately wants to get out of.

I honestly dont understand how AAs can look at that woman and call her queen. But then again, I look at most of AAs posts and i get it. They are as shallow, as entitled, as dumb, as vapid. And probably they have just as much to show up for in their lives, minus the famous husband.

Did I answer your question?

[windvexer]

find some stuff to do magic about (feat. practicing sorcery is fun and good)

Do you want to do magic? Yes. Do you know what to do magic on? Maybe not. Here is a post for that. Take what you like and leave the rest behind.

Confront your learned helplessness face on because I'll bet money that there's a shit ton of stuff in your life you'd change if you hadn't trained yourself to pave it over just to make your highway of life a little less bumpy.

Let me tell you something I believe. I believe that most all of us have been trained to think that:

wanting things to go well,

wanting to be happy,

wanting little joys and pleasures in life,

and wanting not to be aggravated by the small things

somehow makes us weak, lacking, immature, or insecure,

or even worse,

that putting up with bullshit is somehow automatically makes us a better person, as if we've all got a cosmic thermometer that won't ding "good person!" until we've had it up to here with bullshit and then still force ourselves to grin and bear it.

"If I do magic to shorten the Starbucks drive-through doesn't that make me impatient? I don't want to use magic as spiritual bypassing in order to avoid my flaws."

Well then. Far be it from me to decry the kratophany of Prometheus getting his liver pecked out by eagles every day, manifest in your sacred sacrifice of having your minutes pecked out of your day, one by one, as you wait in line.

Make a list. Keep it with you. On paper, on your phone. Doesn't matter. It's a list of things you'd like to change. Little fleeting things that rear their head only for a second or so before our industrial-powered steamrollers smash it into the ground. Big things that you stew over day to day.

No problem is too petty. No splinter in your side is too insignificant. Betty at the office blows her nose every day at 8:15am and if you have to hear it one more time you are going to burn the building down? Put it on the list.

Do you have to leave 20 minutes early for work on Thursdays because a freight train blocks the freeway for five minutes and your city backs up like Betty's nose? What is magic going to do, rearrange the city's entire traffic patterns? Maybe so. Who cares. That's magic's problem, not yours. Put it on the list.

Have your eye on quite a cute designer bag? Does it cost your monthly rent? Put it on the list.

Learn to stare your life in the eye again with the verv of someone who has just found a reality-warping gun with unlimited ammunition. Game night gets cancelled too often? You never remember to use your pizza coupons? You can never remember to get ginger ale at the store? Put it on the list.

Feed yourself what ails you like a crab going absolutely bonkers in a plankton-filled tank.

just do some of that normal "witchy" stuff, why not

Protections: Not only for spirits and stuff!

Against unwanted solicitors

Against your room mate's creepy partner coming over

Against debt collectors finding your new phone number

Against surprise quizzes in your course

Against nightmares

And from time to time a sorcerer does like a good house ward. Experiment with yours, why not? Waiting until you're under attack to learn how to put up protections is like waiting until you're drowning to learn swimming. Sure, the sheer adrenaline-fueled terror might get you somewhere - or it might get in the way.

You don't normally use altars? Build one, why not. Build secret ones in shoe boxes. Experiment with altars and compound magic.

Perhaps you'd like a mini spellcasting kit to go? I don't know if making one counts as doing magic, but it's fun to make them.

Why not develop and prepare an oil or incense blend that must steep for a few months before it's ready? You don't need it now, right? So that means it's prime time to make things that are supposed to "mature" before use.

And hey, what's the deal with cleansing? A lot of people make fun of it now. Some people say it's important and necessary. Why not get really into cleansing and develop your own take? Practice gentle cleansing, nuclear cleansing, cleansing with pure energy and cleansing with candles, cleansing with cleaning products and cleansing with joy.

casting a spell right now is not the same thing as activating it right now and you can still gain a lot of experience in magic without releasing spells into the wild

I think that a lot of people think of spells as I light the candle and the spell is activated and it goes and does the thing, so if there is no Thing right now, then I can't cast the spell,

whereas if you reframed it as I am creating a spell-creachur that will hibernate in this little vessel until I spill it out into the world,

you may actually find that there are dozens of spells for you to actively develop, experiment with, cast, learn from, and passively benefit from - without necessarily needing any of them right now.

And the benefit is, if you don't actually need it right now, that takes a ton of pressure off of you. If you're not acting out of desperation, experimentation can be very fun indeed.

What about the most intense jaw-breakingly stupid strong protective amulet you've ever conceived of? Make it, why not. Make five prototypes on your journey to the strongest danged protection amulet this side of social media.

Who cares if you don't need them? Maybe some day you'll meet someone who does. Or, you know, magic is fun and doing it is its own reward.

What about a talisman for dreamwork and astral travel? Make something that reeks so intensely of the moon that it launches people out of their bodies just by walking past it.

Decide to perfect the most dazzling money-drawing candle spell. Make that your thing. You don't need cash right now? No worries; donate it to charity.

Have fun. Experiment. Made something that came through a little too hard and now it's causing problems? What a wonderful opportunity to learn how to disassemble a spell vessel.

Make yourself a cabinet full of enchantments. Learn how to contain the energy radiating off of all those enchantments. Realize you need more space and learn to combine multiple similar enchantments into one vessel.

make trusting friends who will let you cast on them.

(self explanatory)

[rogue205]

Season 3 Finale Rant…

(Kinda sounds like my other post… 🤷‍♀️ Oh well)

I feel that Soldier Boy is an anti-hero and not a villain. He’s labeled as such because his morals do not align with those of “the good guys”.

Honestly, the show runners kept insisting that SB was bad and had to be stopped by any means necessary but they never showed us why he was apparently so bad. And no, I don’t believe that he “faked his PTSD induced blackouts so he could kill tons of people on purpose”. He’s damaged but he sure as hell ain’t gonna acknowledge or admit it.

Putting it lightly, he’s an ass in every sense but he was also the only one who didn’t go back on his word and betray those whom he had allied with while they shanked him. How does this make him bad? Even after Hughie tried to go back on the deal by teleporting away with Mindstorm, SB still kept to it. Frankly, Hughie is very lucky all he got was a punch in the face/chest. He deserved it too.

And from what we see, SB is not the one constantly on the edge of a massive breakdown and constantly threatening to destroy humanity because he can. That’s Homelander. SB got what he wanted, justified revenge on his former teammates for selling him to Russia. He only stuck around because he had made a deal with Butcher to destroy HL. And he was gonna do it too only for everyone to flip against him at the worst possible time.

The Boys better watch out. They literally delivered their only chance of defeating HL to him on a silver platter. Unfortunately we’re likely gonna have to wait until season 5 to find out what his plans for SB are. I’m betting “Winter Soldier” because SB is going to have massive trust issues, especially getting betrayed again, and he already showed that ‘family’ is not a motivation for him especially since there was no paternal type emotional connections made whatsoever between him and HL or him and Ryan. Despite the fact that he’s since admitted he wanted kids but Vought f-ed that up good.

It’s just too bad that I have very little faith in Eric Kripke to actually stick the landing on his ideas. At least Supernatural made it past season 5 before this problem occurred, The Boys didn’t even make it to season 3. The finale conflict was forced AF and I still don’t believe The Boys would spontaneously team up with HL over a damn kid. Not sorry Ryan, but you should be dead.

My opinion.

[artsyannierose]

Nene’s Dead Corpse and her ghost bf

randomly made a crap ton more sense to me

why?

fricking school (screw school I hate you (no not rly I’m just stressed))

Anyway I’m a biomed class where unit 1 is studying medical investigations forensic science style

and one of the things is like, what happens to a person after the body has been dead for a while (post mortem or sum, see im learning :D)

Things like algor mortis, livor mortis, I’ve heard of. In fact I’ve even studied the clouding of the corneas before, but it never got to me till today

maybe it’s cause I cannot for the life of me study forensics without my wild imagination giving me nightmares or just panicking when I’m alone but aNyWays

I tend to imagine characters associated with death in these scenarios so I don’t lose it in class💀

*cough* Nene *cough cough*

So as I was taking notes on the slideshow, some of the images of clouded corneas reminded me strangely of something familiar, but at that point I couldn’t tell. There’s something haunting about the eyes (or maybe it’s just my over-analytical brain loving small details like this) they’re GORGEOUS

LIKE

IDK THEYRE PRETTY

Maybe it’s ‘cause the true color of the iris is completely visible in all its glory, without the pupil obscuring it

(something like this?? A little vivid tho lol)

but like

there’s no

life

no reflection, no emotion…nothing (which is so hauntingly beautiful leave me alone I’m a sucker for this now)

it’s literally just an eye with nothing but color

and then it hit me…it’s exactly the look Nene had when Mirai fast-forwarded her time

you can see in the image it’s just her plain magenta eyes with a fuzzy de-saturated blob in the center…aka clouded corneas

And that honestly made me realize that in this scene she’s not—she’s not even unconscious

No she’s literally, physiologically dead

THAT IS A CORPSE HE IS HOLDING

she is literally a dead body this hits me so hard😭😭

and I can imagine algor mortis kicked in by then, her body was probably cold to the touch

so imagine how he felt, and I’m aware people have analyzed his emotions but just think about it

he’s always seen her so full of life and hope, and now all he has left is an empty shell of her, cold and dead with no life left inside

…just like him

the more I think about it Hanako is just an animated corpse

he has no reflection in his eyes most of the time because he is ✨dead✨

I mean Mei, Mitsuba, and Hanako don’t have a little white reflection dot like Nene and Kou

Or maybe I’m overthinking it and Nene’s eyes are just super reflective

even for someone who presumably took his own life, he probably never saw tsukasa’s body start postmortem and actually feel dead bc it looked extremely bloody ngl (I’m guessing he killed himself right after 💔)

and now he’s holding someone he cares about like this for the first time and I’ll bet that scarred him

and he figured out that never, never ever did he ever want to see his sweet assistant like this again, lifeless in his arms

and so after that, cue Hanako in his villain era who basically became a yandere the entire picture perfect lmao

and he was unbelievably adamant about it too

I mean honestly if I held anybody I knew lifeless like that I’d be scarred for life and crying for days

seeing the light drained from someone’s eyes is so interestingly sad to me

Look at the difference:

Happy

vs Sad/Determined

vs Depressed (ig??)

vs Dead

She still has so much emotion in her eyes

and then d e a d

literally looks like a porcelain doll

wait she looks so pale in the last image compared to the others now that I think about it

I love aidairo’s eye for detail it’s so fun to figure out

Well anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk essay atp-

IT’S PAST 1 AM AND I SHOULD BE STUDYING FOR SAID BIOMED CLASS AND HERE I AN GOING ON A TANGENT ABOUT A FICTIONAL CHARACTER’S EYES

send help

anyways excuse me while I grab a box of strawberries to munch on and cry my eyes out all over my homework before I sleep-