#I am really trying to put an effort in to be more positive overall

[doberbutts]

I want to talk a bit about the whole "fat trans men are denied top surgery" thing because it's true. Many surgeons have BMI requirements and will not operate on anyone classified as more than "overweight".

But I also want to discuss how testosterone often makes you gain weight, putting trans mascs in a fairly difficult position.

When I started testosterone, I weighed 178lbs. I rapidly shot up to 198lbs. At 5'10" I'm classified as just over a BMI of 30 according to my discharge papers, making me classified as obese. I also started having a bit of a cholesterol problem and being that A: I've also hit my 30s in that time and B: I have an extensive family history of high cholesterol in the men in my family, we tried changing my diet and exercise to see if it was lifestyle or if it was genetic.

In that timespan I dropped 3lbs (bringing me to 195lbs, just under that obese line) and my cholesterol continued to climb. It's been about 7 or 8 months with no other change.

When I tell people that I weigh roughly 200lbs, they don't normally believe me. To be clear I don't really care about any of these numbers, I care about my overall health irt stamina, strength, fatigue, etc and I care about my actual muscle mass and body condition. There are, admittedly, times where I look at my stomach and go :( aww I used to be skinnier. But then there's also times like two nights ago when I looked in the mirror after my shower and just saw A Guy standing there looking at me.

Anyway. My point is, testosterone (and age) made me gain a significant amount of weight, and nothing really I've done has gotten it off. Which is fine with me, because I feel better at this current condition and am stronger and have more stamina than I ever did at lower weights even when I was a competing athlete. Everyone I tell my weight and BMI to is shocked to learn that I am 200lbs and classified as obese. From complete disbelief until I stand on a scale, to the immediate "you wear it well" or "it's all muscle though", to the inevitable "okay but BMI is a load of shit anyway", clearly even though that's what the numbers say I am not exactly the poster child for what lawmakers and fat phobic doctors fear monger about when they discuss the "obesity epidemic".

I am lucky enough that while my surgeon is being very annoying in other ways, she at least has no BMI requirement. For 7 or so months I have been putting in a lot of effort to try and lose some weight to fix my cholesterol and I have pretty much nothing to show for it. If it's that hard for me, someone who visually doesn't really look fat, how difficult must it be for someone who is definitely not toeing the line like I am. How impossible for someone who is in the 400lb, 500lb, 600lb range.

Testosterone makes you gain weigh, and then surgeons won't operate if you gain too much. What a fucking joke.

[cheri-2047]

Wriothesley? Wriothesley x reader? Please, I love Wriothesley- I am so unhinged for him. Anything, I will take anything. Just Wriothesley-

HI ANON!!! This is gonna be included in my weekly poll since the one who won last week was wriothesley !!!

I’ll be having multiple situations and these are just headcanons :3

Wriothesley x Reader bf headcanons

WARNINGS: NONE!! Some mentions of alcohol though

IN THE MORNINGS:

The moment you wake up, no matter what position you sleep in, you find your back on Wriothelsey’s chest as he becomes a big spoon for you

He usually wakes up first, mostly out of habit from work and from when he was arrested, but he will NEVER leave you until you get up.

When you wake up, wriothesley turns you so he hugs you and presses a kiss on your forehead “good morning dear…”

On days you shower first, he cooks bfast and vise versa

You Two head off to work together, but wriothesley always drops you off first before leaving to get back to the fortress of meropide.

DURING WORK HOURS:

Wriothesley messages you every once in awhile to ask if you’re okay, or just to simply say hi.

Sometimes, wriothesley has to work overnight or not even come back home for long periods of time. Because of this, you visit and keep him company sometimes in his spare room in the fortress of meropede.

Whenever you visit, he makes sure sigewinne (I think it’s sigewinne who makes the food in the story quest, please correct me if I’m wrong) prepares really good food, that’s why the prisoners love it when you’re there, since they get a guaranteed good meal.

He feels bad about just having a bed and bathroom in his room, since he didn’t really care much for furniture there, but he started making an effort to buy trinkets or small decorations so you would feel more at home (even if you assure him that he doesn’t have to)

Sometimes when he’s not busy, he would visit you at YOUR work. If you’re ever in a meeting, wriothesley would peek from outside the meeting room and wait for you to finish.

AT NIGHT:

He would cuddle you in any position you’d like, whatever makes you happy.

He would give you a goodnight kiss before you fall asleep but even after you sleep he kisses you a few more times on your cheeks and forehead before going to sleep afterwards.

During bad days, hee really appreciate it if you whisper good things to his ear to lull him to sleep.

Whenever you get a nightmare, wriothesley makes you a cup of your favorite tea before leading you to the bed once more

If you’re cold, he would make it an effort to hug you tighter and bring you closer to him.

OTHER SCENARIOS:

WHEN YOURE SICK:

He takes a day off. Wriothesley informs the staff to take over for him and immediately calls sigewinne to your shared home.

The moment he sees sigewinne writing on her clipboard to prescribe you, he immediately runs to the store and buys you a bunch of medicines

He would pamper you all day, it gets a bit lonely on your bed since he is doing all the chores but wriothesley insists. (That is until you ask him to stay in bed with you)

No matter how bad the sickness, he does not care. He would stay with you and is overall quite protective of you.

WHEN YOURE DRUNK (at a bar):

He would have a spare change of clothes, not to do dirty things but to cover you a bit more up to protect you from creeps.

If you refuse, he would still try to do it, but then in the end he ends up just making sure nobody touches you or hurts you from afar.

He tells the bartender to just not give you anymore alcohol when he notices you’re drinking more than you could take. “Just…put everything but the alcohol”

He feels a bit bad cause in his perspective he’s controlling, and he apologizes for it when you’re sober.

Wriothesley brings you home and gives you a bath before tucking you in to bed.

KISSES:

Wriothesley would kiss you as a “hi” like if you drop by in his office or in the mornings

On your first kiss, he smiled and gave you a hug before saying “I love you”

Wriothesley loves to see your surprised face after you kiss him. He finds it amusing and laughs.

For PDA, if you’re uncomfy then he would respect that, but if you’re not, he would kiss you mostly on the cheek but sometimes on the lips too.

Whenever he sees you talking to someone a bit too closely or they’re being a bit of a creep, he rounds up to you and puts a hand on your shoulder before kissing your head. “Let’s go home shall we darling? I’m quite tired…”

Ran outta ideas but whatever, anyways go eat your food wriothesley simps and no this is not proofread. If I accidentally mischaracterized him mb folks, please tell me if I did.

[obzessed]

HP characters : powerpoint presentation headcanon

This is so random but here is how I imagine marauders' era characters doing a powerpoint presentation

The Marauders

Do over the top presentations, (down to using costumes, yes) would make the wildest powerpoint (too many colors because they can’t agree on anything)

They make it really fun and entertaining tho

use the airplane (flying broom ??) transition, except the airplane is on fire for some reason

indian drama level of presentation

Will Not stop giggling and interrupting each other

Jocks in middle school vibe, but they’re actually really smart

here to clown and have a laugh

generally get a high grade but get points deducted for clarity and taking too damn long

Severus Snape (+bonus Lily Evans)

In a solo presentation, Severus would make perfect, pristine presentation

King of bullet points

University standards powerpoints

only uses peer reviewed articles

always criticizes said peer reviewed articles

Never uses notes, but doesn't look the audience in the eyes ever

Doesn't look at the audience period

He's not shy, he doesn't even do it consciously

Extremely complicated subjects, Will Not Dumb It Down For You

If anyone has a question, will look at them as if they’re the biggest idiot in the room

The type to explain by simply reformulating what he just said

If they still don’t understand either sighs dramatically and moves on, or sighs dramatically and start drawing on the board, speaking veeeryyyyy slowly, you let me know where I lost you idiot fellow classmate

Actually explains really well when he puts in some effort, has this clean cut way of decomposing each problem and detailing each point, then tying it all back together that makes it really easy to follow

writing on the board and drawing legitimately helps him lay out his thought process

the condescension is just a plus

Type of presentation that is objectively very good and interesting and well thought out but like. no one cares. bring back the airplane transitions.

For a few people sufficiently advanced and interested and who actually understand what he’s talking about, (and who are not rebuked by his style and general attitude), it’s a v good presentation

Positive : Always adds something new and generally brings really pertinent arguments, genuinely passionate about what he’s talking about

Teachers pick up on his fast out of the box thinking and surprising creativity

his powerpoint design is a little depresso, no colors except to highlight important words

very minimalist and to the point

Regulus argues every point of his presentation

Academic rivals to lovers frfr

Gets point deducted for his attitude and his “lack of enthusiasm”

NOW Severus + Lily = best of both worlds, get an O everytime

Lily always insists on using canva (their pwp designs are so cute)

overall they balance each other really well

I feel like Lily would get a little giggly if she fumbles

The marauders would def shout “boring” and giggle like middleschoolers at the back of the class during Snape's presentation

Snape's ability to remain unfazed in the face of bs stems from there

God help them all if they get paired up for a presentation

Marauders + Severus

Snape would have to settle for at least one airplane transition

It would become a war of adding and deleting each other's progress on the pwp design

they split it in two but they try to gain terrain on the other's part like in Clash of Clan

They are at WAR

“I am a commander in battle and your slides are but a village on a map” James Potter

“Fuck you” Severus Snape

“Go jump off an airplane if you like them so much”

Somehow the presentation is even more chaotic than the previous one

passive aggressively asks the other to click on the next slide

always takes the other's question just as they're about to speak

If Snape sees a single one of them look at their notes for too long it's on sight (RIP Pettigrew)

Bc Fuck if he's gonna lose points over this

best or worst grade

lots of brain cells

Teacher tried to make the braincells hold hands but the brain cells are Enemies

[sheenashifts1217]

Pick a Pile No.1

Welcome to my first Pick a Pile :)

This is a collective reading so it may resonate more for some than others. Take what helps you and leave what doesn’t. 💗

If you’d like a personal reading, I currently have a deal in my shop for a free five song channeled playlist with any purchase of an s/o reading. Check my pinned post for more details.😊

What Advice Will Aid Your Shifting Journey

Choose pile 1, 2, or 3

Take a breath and simply pick the one you feel most drawn to.

(Top left pile 1, top right pile 2, bottom pile 3)

Pile 1

Lyrics standing out:

“You b**** ain’t like me

Dance in the breeze

A man with the sleaze

Stop it, get another topic

I got the nerve

And I block it

You’re a brat

Cause I never repeat

Do what I say like Simon

I’m a VIP

Sorry I’m pretty and easy to hate”

Okay pile 1, I SEE YOU GUYS!!! 💅🏼 This pile is short and sweet because you all know what you need, self aware queens. You all know your power, and as you should. For those of you in this pile who really know your power, own it more, step into it, actually practice it.

It feels like you all know what you need to do and you know you can shift, you’re just being lazy. PUT THE WORK IN. But frl, it seems like you guys really just need to set some time aside to focus on shifting and your DR because you know what to do, you just feel too busy. It’s okay to take a breath. Some of you all in this pile may also be rushing yourself. Allow yourself to accept what your experiencing and just let it flow. It’s already yours, you already have all of your desires.

Overall, pile 1, you guys are baddies whether you know it or not. Step into that power, own it, and use it. Make time for yourself and slow down a little. You don’t have to experience everything at the same time, that’s why you have a life, spend it.

Confirmation: 222, 444, Aquarius, ford mustang, hot pink, purple number 4, Elmo?, Sesame Street, Disney, neon green nails

Pile 2

Lyrics standing out:

“Trying to cover up my face

Try and stay calm

Something missing

I think looks wrong

When pretty isn’t pretty enough

What do you do?

I could change up my body and change up my face

You can win the battle

Insecure

Try to ignore it

I don’t know why I even try (I see the starfish position)

Just feel like sh*** over and over again”

Hi pile 2! You guys are giving me 2020 shiftok vibes. A lot of you probably started to practice shifting around 2019/2020 and were fed a lot of misinformation and now you feel like that is stopping you, but it doesn’t have to, let that go. You are in charge of your own reality so take that misinformation and use it as a learning experience. Don’t be discouraged because it was false or didn’t work for you, that’s good because now you’re one step closer to knowing yourself and what does work for you!

You may be a person that is on social media a lot in general or just hyperaware of others lives and you’re comparing yourself to them. STOP IT. Everyone’s experience is their own. When you see someone else’s success or experience, you don’t know what went down before that. Focus on yourself and what is meant for you, will happen. Accept it and take charge of it. You may be one who relies on others success for your own motivation as well, this is your sign to rely on yourself. Connect with your higher self and trust your intuition.

Keep going pile 2! You guys have put in time and energy this far, what’s a little longer? Your efforts are not in vain. You’ve got this. Trust yourself!

Confirmation: tiktok, iPhone, 13, dodge, dodgers, football, Dallas cowboy cheerleaders, red white & blue, Olympics, gymnastics, toe nails, 12

Pile 3

Lyrics standing out:

“Light headed

For some reason I find myself lost in what you think of me

And too confused who I should be

In a big old world

We’re so alike

When I cross that line

It’s been a point of contention between myself and this body they stuck me in

Am I pretty enough to lie to you

Let me be the void you fill

I am quantum physics

My witness brings me to existence

So I can be your girlfriend boyfriend”

Hello my lovely pile 3! You all feel trapped either in your bodies or just to this reality in general. You have put shifting to your DR on a pedestal or even a part of you doesn’t want to accept that it’s real because you may not feel worthy. Remind yourself that you are constant, flowing energy.

Some of you have been so focused on “finding yourself”, that instead you have used the 3D to define who you are in the 4D. Make the two align.

Try to focus more on the “what” of shifting, instead of the “how”. Feel those connections and emotions you have in your DR. Maybe focus on one in particular that is important to you. Focus on one DR at a time. You have overwhelmed yourself with the thoughts of wanting to shift and being everywhere at once. Take your time and enjoy your CR as well. Shifting is an act and a journey, it’s real life, so make sure you’re still taking care of yourself.

In summary, you are more than your body. You are your thoughts and emotions and your actions, your love and energy you spread. Own that energy and use it for your benefit. Focus on who you are and what it is you want. Try to have a clear idea of that, then connect to it. Once you feel that connection, that’s it. Congratulations it’s now yours. Forget the 3D and just know it’s already yours.

Confirmation: red, Taylor Swift, (Taylor’s version), reputation, Niall Horan, train, Liam Payn, 2222, lock and key, hearts, stars, moon, “go piss girl”, dress to impress

[cranquis]

Your recent reblog made me sad, but also makes a lot of sense. I've been following you since I was in medical school, and I'm now in my fifth year of specialty training (I am not American). I did occasionally wonder why I've been seeing less of the kind of content you used to put out.

All I can say is - thank you for the work you do. I've seen enough online to get an idea of what you must face on a daily basis. I think I'm lucky that somehow, the doctor-patient relationship overall hasn't deteriorated to such an extent where I live (yet at least), but I definitely understand the frustration and despair of trying to communicate with people who aren't coming into the conversation in good faith.

You've always been a kind of role model for me in terms of your passion for your work and your open sharing about your faith. I guess I just wanted to say that I hope you find hope and joy in your work, even if those you serve aren't wise enough to appreciate what you do for them.

Hi, my colleague! Hey first of all, thank you for your kind words of encouragement and affirmation. Negative med-related interactions (online or in person) anymore just roll off me, but the positive ones still give my heart a thrill! :) And congrats on your continued journey down the medical pathway.

Second, I'm glad your message gives me the chance to clarify for all my long-time Cranquis Pants* that I still do enjoy my work. I have been doing the exact same Urgent Care job in the exact same location (with quite a few staff turnovers) ever since I finished residency 17 years ago! I still enjoy the bulk of my patient interactions, I continue to hone my diagnostic skills, I feel very confident in my procedural skills, I have a reputation in our local medical community as a reliable and thorough physician, and I have a loyal group of patients who routinely nag me to "quit urgent care and become a regular doctor so we can be your primary care patients". My staff likes and respects me (despite my best efforts to ruin that on the daily, with my puns etc); I like my staff and appreciate the hard work they do in the face of the same administrative and societal opposition that I encounter; I am not distressed when little kids freak out during physical exams (and my success rate of turning those frowns upside down with playful interactions and silly sound effects is pretty darn good).

I am blessed with amazing work-life balance, more than the majority of Family Medicine-trained physicians I suspect. I carry no pager, I take no call, I leave my work at home when I go home. I know my schedule months in advance, I have a shift template that gives me plenty of week-long stretches off, and I have my Sabbaths 100% free to attend church and spend time with my family. My pay is decent and my benefits are solid, my debts get paid and I have a roof over my head. My kids and wife are happy to see me come home. Personally, I really have nothing to complain about.

But the bloom is off the rose for my profession as a whole. The politics and trends of the US health care system continues to disenfranchise physicians, devaluing the years and $$ invested in becoming physicians, over-valuing patient satisfaction scores and inexpensive labor and glitzy administrative initiatives and staff rumor mills more than evidence-based, experience-driven clinical medicine. The power structure is upside down, as if doctors ought to be automatically doubted and disdained by pharmacists, insurance companies, administrators, patients, and APCs because of their systematic educational journeys and reliance upon scientific evidence.

And one of the saddest results is watching medical professionals turn on each other. The fragmentation and super-specialization of every aspect of medical care creates artificial "us v. them" scenarios; specialists and primary-care battling over who does the paperwork for pre-op visits and FMLA, ER and Urgent Care arguing about how much workup should be undertaken by the UC when the patient is obviously going to need ER management, primary-care so overwhelmed with insurance-required goals that their patients can never get same-day/soon-day appointments, pharmacies so understaffed that it's easier for them to tell the patients that "the doctor never sent the prescription" when in reality ...

I could go on.

I miss the old days (said the geezer on the internet), when I could enthusiastically support a pre-med student's dreams of getting into medical school and "helping people as a doctor someday." Now I wince at the idealism in a high-schooler's eyes, and try to find a nice way to say "there's more options for helping people than just becoming a doctor... be sure you have your motivations straight, because medicine is not what it was even 10 years ago..."

So hope and joy in my career? Hope for the profession of physicians, I have little. But I make the joy in my practice when I can make it, and I only expect to find joy in my non-medical time with family and hobbies and travel and friends and the lifestyle which my medical career still does make more feasible than otherwise.

*Probably not the term historically assigned to "fans of this blog", back when I posted frequently -- it's been a minute -- but if not, SHOOT that was a missed opportunity.

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

Enhypen Group Dynamics

I will now look into the overall group dynamics of this group. I mostly get messy energy from them as a group, but let's see what I get here. This doesn't look too bad from what I see here.

Overall Energy (6 of Pentacles) It is a nice balance of give and take when it comes to the members. There are a lot of exchanges that come with this group. They enjoy being of service and help for each other, more on the practical end of things, not so emotional here, but that is okay. They all seem to be really generous with each other overall. There is this energy of wanting to have the upper hand though. I sense undertones of that. The powerplay keyword is sticking out to me as well. But there is this overall energy of being supportive to each other. It seems they have each other's back.

Heeseung (5 of Cups rv) In the group dynamic he tries not to be too negative or dwell on things too much. He tries to find the positive and look at the bright side, so he may try to help lift up the other members when they are feeling down. I feel he has a way of words to help the members feel better. I hear cheer up, also he may invite members for some drinks, or give them a drink to help release stress. I just see a hand offering a drink in the card and made me think of that. He might also remind them of the good things they may have, so they don't focus on the negative. This is cute.

Jay (8 of Pentacles) I say, he is the one who keeps them on task. He helps keep them focused and reels them in. It seems he is very hard-working and diligent, so he may inspire the other members to do the same. The ace of wands also popped out, so he does inspire them with his skills and work ethic. I feel they really like his work ethic and try to emulate that. Sometimes he can be way too focused on work and may not focus on the members and what is going on with them with this energy.

Jake (7 of Cups) This does not surprise me, he is the dreamer of the group. The one who struggles to actualize and make his plans or dreams come to life. I see this being a struggle with him a lot. There is a lot of confusion with him, procrastination is a thing with him. It is like he is the one that may tell them he wants to do something, but never actually gets to it. He struggles to take action. It is also hard for him to stay focused. He is like the opposite of Jay lol I am not sure what this has to do with the dynamics though. It is like within the dynamic he is the dreamy one. I also just got filled with illusions. I don't know he may confuse the members, like he may say one thing and do another. He is confusing to be honest.

Sunghoon (6 of Pentacles) Okay, this one is not giving me the best vibe, so the 6 of Pentacles, which did represent their overall energy, can be a good exchange between parties, but the card image makes me feel a bit bad for him. It is giving me he puts his all, gives his effort to the others, but may not get much in return. In the card, there is this one person giving to all these people, but they don't seem to be giving much to her. I see that as him. I feel they may not appreciate his efforts as much as maybe they should. Anyway, he does give to them members as much as he can when they need it, more of being of service, not so emotional on his end.

Sunoo (2 of Cups) It seems he is the one that likes to connect on an emotional level with the members. He may enjoy one on one time with them, since he represents the 2 of cups, which is an emotional connection. I feel emotional connections is important to him, but I feel this group could struggle to be more emotional, so that could be a struggle for him. There could be a specific member at the moment that he feels very connected to as well. It seems he enjoys the intimate connections he could have with the members. I do feel this is specific to one member, not sure who though.

Jungwon (Page of Pentacles) This card loves to pop up in these readings. The third time this came out in all three readings I have done so far. He is the studious. The one who gathers information. If you read his perspective reading this will make sense. He does the work and puts in the time. I swear he gathers information on the members and observes what they do, it is like keeping tabs or taking notes on them. I got this in other readings I have done for him in the past. He studies a lot and maybe tries to help the others with the information he has learned. I just see him as an observer, like that is what I see from this card. Like these boys better not slip up in front of him, because he seems to know everything about them, or tries to, now what he uses that on, I don't know. I just see all those books and it is like him gathering all that information. It is like yup, I got information on all of you lol

Ni-Ki (2 of Swords) I feel this boy tries to keep his distance from the others. Can be pretty standoffish and stubborn. He seems to oppose them a lot or stay neutral. He may struggle to make decisions within the group, or just does not give af There is a phrase on the card that states, pretending there is no problem, I see that with him. Like if members inquire, he doesn't let them in or let them help him. He has a defensive energy and doesn't like the others to get too close. He just kind of does his own thing most of the time. Also, if there are disagreements between members, I see him not picking sides and staying neutral, not getting involved, which is fair to be honest.

Okay, going through this, yeah, a bit of messiness with this group. I wouldn't say messy, but they don't give me close besties vibe with this energy. But I do find their dynamics interesting though, so I will take it.

[idesofrevolution]

Let’s talk honestly

So I just wanna share where I’m at these days with Tumblr, the community, and some concerning developments as of late. Firstly, I want to thank all 5k of you for supporting me for almost a decade on this platform. It has been a wild ride with ups and downs but this community has really given me an overall positive impact on my self image, bettered my writing skills, and helped to come to terms with who I am as a person and as a kinkster. So above all, I have so much gratitude for y’all, thank you.

Over the last couple of months, I have taken notice to some difficulties on behalf of Tumblr and their censorship efforts against queer erotic writing. I have had to fight more flags and community labels than ever before, and it has really affected my desire and motivation to publish more stories. If only certain folks with their mature censor turned off can read my posts, that fuckin sucks. But I admittedly got rather stoned last night and thought about why Tumblr is cracking down so viciously on our content. I think I’ve come to my own conclusion there.

I am and have been extremely alarmed by a number of tropes that have become relatively commonplace in recently posted tf prose. As I have mentioned countless times before, underage people have no business being in your sexual fantasy fiction whatsoever. The amount of writers I’ve seen recently posting stories focusing on 12-16 year of children being erotically transformed is disturbing to put it delicately. Especially those which maintain the children’s psychological age intact, but even without that trope it is inappropriate, unacceptable, and should not be platformed on Tumblr.

In addition, I’d like to touch on another trope: homophobic tf. Now I have no issue whatsoever with Gay to straight, as being straight is a valid expression of sexual orientation. There is nothing wrong with featuring characters from a wide array of identities. That being said, this new content of lib to con, MAGA tf, gay bashing tf… it’s disgusting. In the current world we live in, these types of archetypical characters do exist in the real world and are causing real significant harm to queer folks. These groups of people are actively, in their own words, trying to eradicate the LGBT community in America. These types of people exist all over the world as well, and queer identifying people live in legitimate, actual fear for their lives. I question why we fetishize individuals who seek a literal genocide of an entire peoples, and whether it is acceptable to do so. I point to the fetishization of Nazism as an apt comparison: a hypermasculinized group of people who sought eradication of a group of people based solely on concrete identities which could not be changed. I believe we as a community have rightly deplatformed such content, and I cannot fathom why this current iteration is in such a Renaissance.

These are just two examples of obvious reasoning as to why Tumblr might righteously suppress tf erotica on their platform. Can I blame them? No. Frankly, I understand completely. If the community refuses to monitor and moderate its on content, then Tumblr as the platform most certainly will.

I’m unsure as to what the future looks like for Ides, as this current trajectory is not something I’d like to participate in. I’m hoping like minded writers will be a bit more critical in choosing the tropes and prompts for their stories, but in all honesty, I have significant doubts. Rest assured, I will touch base with y’all before I do anything drastic. But in my opinion, the writing is on the wall.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #440

Ohh. Sephiroth. I am spiraling today. Despite the best efforts of a friend in this space trying to encourage me, I'm still spiraling.

...I assume there's too much adrenaline in my system to think clearly. And perhaps a few too many shots of R's chocolate-cherry moonshine, too. And given that the shot glasses in my house (inherited, and almost never used) contain twice as much volume as the shot glasses at R's house, and given that it only took two shots at his house to get my brain all wiggly, I'm sure you can imagine the state I'm in right now.

...It was not my best decision. To be sure, the goal was not to get into an altered state, but rather, to distract myself from the fact that my brain is on fire by flooding my senses with a strongly-flavored thing, and that was the most strongly-flavored thing in the refrigerator. Which, I suppose, isn't much better as an explanation; I'm still running away via sensory stimulation instead of facing the emotions swirling around in my skull, which... isn't ideal.

I have pinky-promised never again to consume anything containing alcohol while under the influence of adrenaline. I believe firmly that a person is only as good as the integrity of their word, and so, if I make a promise, I treat it like a contract or... maybe more like a geas (geis...?) – a terrible, unacceptable thing to break, punishable by immediate termination of the relationship by the person I made the promise to.

I didn't do anything stupid, so don't worry; I mostly just played Hades. Though admittedly, at the moment, I am still wanting to shove my face full of the Belgian chocolate cake from the nearby dessert place, and also far too much cheese, and also all the garlic, and also, oddly specifically, crunchy baked chicken skin, strongly spiced. Though I'm not gonna do that right now, because my stomach is already full.

Overall, I think it's a combination of factors that has led to my current state. My sleep schedule has been all over the place. I've not been keeping up with my hydration. My mother texted me last week (in which she, once again, insisted that nothing that happened was her fault because she was poor and stressed and etc.; this is my surprised face: 😐). I had two interviews (Friday and today). My shoulder was stabbed full of holes. The thing with J's sister happened. And, given that some muscles that were trying to protect my ribs have relaxed (due to the “stabbing full of holes”), I left work on Saturday in more pain than usual after lifting trays and boxes. And for the last several days, I've had mild intestinal distress (which means what little water I have been getting hasn't been absorbed well...). It is only Monday.

The last 6 days have been messy, and despite my best efforts to remain chipper and upbeat... I think I must be pretty tired.

Nonetheless, I functioned today. I went to a job interview for a position that I don't think I would fit very well in. It would, essentially, involve being part of a call center team who works with people claiming unemployment benefits. Or... essentially... working with people who are scared because they don't have a steady source of income and then call with problems that they likely wanna yell at the nearest human about in order to feel powerful and in control of their lives.

I think that even if I do get this one, I won't take it; I don't do very well with phone conversation thanks to audio processing delay. And I don't do very well with being someone else's personal verbal punching bag, either. The whole arrangement really doesn't sound like a fun time. And... judging from the interview questions, I don't think I have the qualities they're looking for, anyhow.

J and I stopped for Eggcellent on the way home.

Then when I got home, I made baked chicken leg quarters with the usual asparagus and mac-n-chz. This time, though, I put that black garlic seasoning on the chicken.

...I'm a little sad to report that, after baking, the black garlic seasoning tastes more like vegetable bouillon than like black garlic. Don't get me wrong, it's not bad at all, but... I'll have to put on some actual garlic powder with it next time.

J's sister called J sometime after that, supposedly by accident. They had a conversation about the vile things she wrote to J via text. Apparently, she had a hard time understanding why J would feel upset about the fact that she called him a piece of shit, among other similarly ugly things. They spoke for a long time. J essentially was only asking her to be forthcoming about her discomfort (i.e. “When you said abc, I interpreted xyz; is that accurate? If not, what did you mean? And if so, don't say abc ever again, please.”) so they can have a rational discussion when a conflict arises. But it seems like none of his words were getting through; his tone became increasingly exasperated as she, seemingly, tried to poke holes in the validity of his very simple request.

...It's not unexpected. M, J, and I all come from abusive families. We all have been abused differently and with different details, but... we all have C-PTSD. We make our relationship work by being very forthcoming about our feelings, and by holding ourselves accountable when we inevitably make mistakes; we work to correct our destructive behaviors and communication methods. We put effort every day into managing the scars and the conditioning that our respective upbringings left us with.

...J's sister does not do the same. And that's probably largely due to the fact that she still lives with her abusers. You can't learn new habits or defy your conditioning very well if your body is pumped full of adrenaline all the time. All the same, she seems committed to her narrative that J and I are both malicious, horrible people, so... I don't really know what else to do for it but keep my distance.

Notably... I noticed today that when I got “in trouble” (I didn't really get in trouble; M and J just thought my course of action was unwise and asked me not to repeat it, which is reasonable and fair) for drinking R's moonshine while upset, I noticed a significant reduction in my anxiety related to the presence of adrenaline in my system.

...I can't help but wonder if, at this point, my body is so accustomed to receiving to punishment in response to being misunderstood that it can't quite stop producing adrenaline until the "punishment" occurs. I wonder if, in the space between my perceived mistake and some kind of reprisal, my body remains in tension, on the lookout for said reprisal, so that I'm not taken by surprise by it when it comes, as what used to occur in days past. Hm.

...I wonder if there's a way to fix that. I'll ask my therapist when I see them tomorrow. Or... I'll try to anyway. But I've already got so much to talk to them about, between my mother's text and this thing with J's sister, that I'm not really sure I'll be able to get through it all in the hour that's allotted to me. They're one of the few people who interacts with me in good faith that I am a non-malicious person, and their wisdom gives me lots and lots of perspectives and interpretations to consider besides my own; having only monthly visits with them has been hard.

Nonetheless, I have to figure out a way to not get bent out of shape whenever I am misunderstood by emotionally available people. I have to figure out why I get so bent out of shape in response to that in the first place. I... this... it can't continue.

…

...But even as I am writing this, interacting with other people at all still seems like a treacherous thing that only ever leads to me getting misunderstood and hurt. Maybe I'll feel differently once the adrenaline clears from my system. I'll hope for that outcome.

Suppose I should go to bed. And drink water, too. Though not necessarily in that order.

...I'm gonna be okay, all right? Just. The week has been exceptionally weird, and I've fallen down just a little. But I'm not gonna stay here. Despite the fact that other humans seem terrifying to me right now, I know I've got some good people in my corner, with hands ready and waiting to lift me up. I just gotta get my head back on straight, that's all. And I will. And then I'll be back to normal.

I love you. Stay safe out there. I'll write again soon.

Your friend, Lumine

[perplexingluciddreams]

Today is Mum's birthday!!

Sister is home from uni and she brought me my snack! (And she came into my room yesterday to say hello but I was stuck in my focus so I couldn't make myself look at her or give much attention ☹️). I got a hug!! 😊🥰 She is very cool with an awesome t-shirt and nose ring and beautiful hair. She always looks so put together and lovely. I love her so much.

I have settled into routine of wearing AFO braces on non-bath days. It is too much to do it every day, but I really want to do it... and the only way it is possible to keep up with is if it fits in my routine. So I told Mum all that and she suggested that I only wear them on non-bath days (because bath is very tiring and requires resting afterwards that whole day).

Mum got me new knee-high black socks! (for under braces). They are bamboo and completely seamless (necessary for sensory). They feel super soft and wonderful. I have major sensory issues with socks and shoes, but these socks is the best feelings socks I have maybe ever worn. And that is saying really a lot from me!

The velcro bits (for the elastic strap going over the top of my foot) kept falling off. Dad tried to fix it once but the glue didn't stick because the plastic of the braces is too smooth - it just popped right off again. He has fixed it better now and hopefully 🤞🏻 they will stay now!

I have been trying very hard with something else new - wearing sports bra. I need help with putting it on, but because it is "post surgery bra" with zip at the front, I can wiggle it off without taking t-shirt off (which means I don't need help for that!).

My chest is large and heavy. Causes a lot of pain and discomfort (both sensory and physical muscle pain). I am trying to make this less bad by spreading out the weight of my chest using sports bra. It is sensory very hard, and my ribs really really complain about the pressure of the band. But overall I think it is helping.

I am also looking online for other bras that could help... but finding any that fit my sensory needs as well as the size of my chest and the amount of support I need... it is fucking tricky, I'll say that. Also, any other ones that I see that look semi-promising, I would need much more help getting on and off.

I am used to getting help, and it is fine. I don't care about Mum seeing my boobs - she already helps me bathe and dress and sees me fully naked every other day (and half-naked all the days in-between) and all of that. Privacy is not the main "issue" here. And it is not really a huge "issue" at all.

But sometimes it is nice to have small little things that I have a wee bit independence with. It might not seem like much of anything to most people, but the fact that I can undo the zip on my bra, under my t-shirt, and have the motor planning and dexterity to pull my arms inside the t-shirt to wriggle out of the bra and then put arms back through the right holes - that is pretty huge for me!

It makes me feel more confident and capable. I don't have much confidence or self-belief. In part due to being as disabled as I am, and becoming more and more aware of my impairments and things I can't do, as I have gotten older.

So when there is added in a new thing in my routine, that requires more help... I just have feelings about it, I think. Especially because the gender stuff and dysphoria complicates things. And because it is yet another thing I am asking Mum to do, and I sometimes feel guilty and shameful about that. I don't really know what I am trying to say.

Regardless of the ramble above ^, I am very proud of how hard I am trying with these two new things. They are things that I can already feel the positive effect of, even though it is difficult to tolerate and takes so much brain capacity. I am really putting in so much effort to do good things for my body.

It is hard when something doesn't feel good or nice in the moment, but I know it will have positive later effect. I have trouble brain connecting the future effect with the current present unpleasantness. But I am doing it anyway, and for that I am proud and impressed with myself.

[ask-ikevamp-faust]

Faust!!! You speaking spanish really surprised me! I'm really happy when I discover sides like this from you! You for sure have a great person as a teacher taking good care of you and I really don't expect less from someone as smart as you. That was very very sweet, thank you! 🩷 Still, I'm trying my best to write in english to make things comfortable.

I've been really tired this days but reading your words the other day gimme such a energy boost! I was less tired in a instant! It really put me in such high spirits even if everything feels so awful lately.

I'm working the most dreadful job ever, I wish I could do everything but what I'm doing right now. I wish I was doing something more trivial like cleaning houses, everything to escape, I could be cleaning the castle where you live, I wonder how much the wrinkle old bat would pay for dusting off the whole place (haha).

Such delusions I have. I do respect people who do domestic labor, they deserve more recognition and to be payed more!

I think a lot of my bitterness comes from me spending already 10-12 hours in the office, so I really have very limited time between the week for myself. When I take my time to write back to people, I'm giving them part of the little time I have. I think how every person's time is precious.

I think a lot about this woman that I really like who talks a lot about otome games and I really like how she always takes her time to reply to every single person who leaves a comment or ask a question and she says is because if someone is taking their time and effort to leave some words, the least she can do is doing the same.

TBH I did over did the other day at work and stayed very late, but just because I wanted to have some peace of mind today and I leave work early. I had to take a bath because everyone was sweaty and stinky in the bus I took and It was packed so I was feeling pretty gross. Right now I'm just writing before going to bed.

There was a beautiful white full moon while walking at home the other day and today there was a golden moon slowly rinsing to the sky.

Really considering making a "faustian bargain" just so you're here with me (doesn't sound that crazy if I look for a way) I would love to have a date, either to walk at the beach or a tour in your secret lab with the corpses you have there, both sound absolutely delightful to me ✨

I think is very sweet you're taking word from your admi to tone it down, but I do think one of the things I love about you is the extremes of your personality, I think it makes a perfect balance of you, you can be very rough and harsh and yet very soft and kind. I think there were already some times in past replies when I was the gremlin to you and you were trying to be annoying but I expect as much of you.

Sleeping is also very unpleasant to me lately, I wish at least one sweet dream of you and less nightmares at night, I don't know what I have to do to channel those positive ideas. I really wish you a very cosy oversleeping to you ☺️ I just wanted to write back as soon as posible 🩷

– @crowmero

Don’t praise my admin. It's undeserved, I had to find resources on my own. She claims it’s unfair if any of us in the castle speak her second language since the rest of us speak languages she doesn’t understand. You may continue to write in English or switch between both languages, I’m fine either way. If it serves as good English practice for you then who am I to deprive you of it.

I doubt Vlad would pay at all when the overly devoted Charles is here doing everything. Try convincing Charles to work less around here, maybe you’ll open an opportunity for yourself. Of course if the castle is too big, you can always become my employee; my lab always needs to be cleaned. 

If you don't mind sharing, why did you choose your current job and what’s keeping you there? If it’s causing you so much distress you should find something else. It could potentially harm your overall well-being in the long run if you continue putting such stress on yourself. 

It’s good to see that there are still people in this time who reciprocate and show appreciation for people’s time, like this woman you mentioned. I agree with this sentiment, time is precious. That may sound odd coming from a vampire but in my line of work, I’ve seen many people run out of time for several reasons. Life and time are extremely precious.

Mmmm, it’s difficult to punish you for staying extra at work when you leave early the next day. I suppose your decision deserves praise.

Is that truly what you desire? To spend time with me… Hmm I’ll have to add kidnapping you on my list, right next to my grave digging.

Excellent, this means my admin can’t try to scold me for being a “gremlin”. Now then, don’t be shocked if you receive the extremes of my personality from now on. And yes, I recall our other replies, such fun banter. I expect more of it from you, don’t disappoint me.

You’re strange, most people would consider it a nightmare if I appeared in their dreams. However, if you're seriously trying, they say that if you think about something before falling asleep, you’ll dream about whatever you were thinking about. Try thinking about me before sleeping, find pictures of me as well if it helps with immersion. I’d like to know if this method works, so make sure you share the results of this experiment with me.

By the way, @crowmero there's no need to reply to me as soon as possible. I'm not going anywhere, I'm always here; even at the most random hours because my sleep schedule does not exist.

[ciaossu-imagines]

Can you answer the ‘Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉’ prompt?

C

Uhhhhh…oh my gosh, but do you keep throwing me some really hard ones tonight. I think that I’m a lot like most other writers. I think there’s a little bit of self-doubt almost all writers feel about their works, places that they see mistakes or ways it could have been worded better. I think every single writer out there has struggled with at least one idea, one story, one scene…something…where what came out on the paper just couldn’t match what they saw in their head, what they heard, what they felt while thinking about and writing the story. The words just weren’t enough. In some cases, the fics I hide or the original works still tucked away unfinished, the words weren’t just not enough, the words actively felt cheap, synthetic, like discount knockoffs of what it should have been. Those are the stories that still hurt, because they’re simply trapped inside.

Add onto that that I do have an OCD compulsion based around being perfect. Literally, my brain screams at me that if whatever I do isn’t absolutely perfect, isn’t precise and good enough, bad things will happen and I will be hurt in some terrible way. That makes me even more hyper-critical of everything I touch, including my writing. It makes me my own worst critic. It’s that way in every sphere of my life, so saying good or even just polite things about myself can be very hard at times. Like I’m said…self-esteem? Bitch ain’t no friend of mine.

But I’m trying hard here to think of positives to say. I’m trying hard to actually sit and try to figure out some compliments to properly answer your question. After all, I do hate not answering anyone who takes the time to come into my inbox and especially someone I consider a friend! So, as far as complimenting myself goes, in terms of writing, I will say that I am quite hard-working. I put a lot of time and effort into writing and always try my best to make the finished product a decent read. It doesn’t matter the overall finished length. I put my heart and soul into making each post the best it can be. I approach writing, both for original works, for fanfic, and for this blog, with all my heart and all my passion and I purposefully carve out hours out of every day to actively work on something writing related. Sometimes that means waking up at 5 in the morning so that I can grab an extra hour or two of writing time before I need to get ready to go to work. Sometimes that means working a twelve hour day, making it home at 10pm at night and still making myself sit for an hour and work on whatever writing project I can manage that night. Sometimes it’s sitting for 8-10 hours on my days off, only taking smoke, coffee, and pee breaks to power through a really healthy chunk of posts or several pages of a fanfic or an original story.

In terms of a compliment to my writing, the best I could come up with is that I do think I’m decent at getting the feelings of things across. I like to believe I’m able to use language purposefully and carefully, delicately, to convey the vibe of a scene, to immerse the reader in a place and to allow them to properly understand, hopefully even empathize with but at least understand, what a character or several characters are feeling. While I still maintain that I struggle with dialogue, I feel like I set tone well within my writing, I kill my darlings well while editing when I do edit, and I try, and hope I succeed, in allowing the readers to connect with the characters.

[starsinkpop]

ATEEZ Park Seonghwa Tarot Reading - Future Spouse

Disclaimer: I do tarot readings for fun, so please read them with a grain of salt. Don’t take my words too seriously and just keep an open mind. Tarot is a divination tool that can’t predict the future, as every single individual has their own will and makes their own decisions. Tarot should be seen as a guidance and a good friend that just has your best interest and gives you advice when needed. I’m not putting anyone in my readings on a pedestal nor am I trying to harm anyone. One last side note, I’m not a native speaker, so please excuse any wrong spellings or poor grammar.

Date of Reading: October 9th 2023

Decks: Ethereal Visions Tarot, Wild Mystic Oracle, Dreamscape Oracle, Romance Angel Oracle, Love Oracle, island time wellness love Oracle, Angel Answers Oracle Cards

Three of Cups, Eight of Swords, XIX The Sun, Seven of Pentacles, Two of Cups, Ace of Pentacles, Knight of Wands, Six of Swords

I see someone who’s friends with Seonghwa first - friends to lovers trope saying hi

someone who’s pretty social and very warm and open to others

a very patient soul, who’s nurturing

they help others heal in some kinda way

and want to protect and defend the ones in need

they have a heart of gold and keep secrets very well

his fs is someone very positive and charismatic

could be “too good” for this cruel world

like they’re sometimes too blind to see when people mean to harm them because they always want to see the good in others and they end up getting hurt

I don’t see them ever doing something about that tho because they’re someone who’s generally pretty often misunderstood and they don’t want to make anyone else feel misunderstood

so, they’d rather get hurt and be wrong afterwards than to potentially hurt someone’s feelings by misunderstanding their actions or behavior

however, they have to go through those karmic relationships and lessons to become the person they’re supposed to be

people easily fall in love with them

because they’re beautiful on the inside and outside as well

I don’t really get anything specific about their look except that they’re stunning and gorgeous

they’re extremely charming and won’t hesitate to take action and go for what they want

and they’re the life of any party and could be a night owl

they focus on communities, a social butterfly

but they tend to get lost in their heads

they have a racing mind and tend to overthink at times

but they never lose their playful and happy side

they’re the ray of sunshine you miss after days of rain, no matter how down they are themself, they make sure to always make their loved ones happy and give them warmth and comfort. Kinda sacrificing themself at times

people really feel uplifted after being around them

they are very devoted in relationships and could be younger than him

overall very loving and caring, just very a sweet person that almost everyone would really like to have around

big daydreamer

could dream more about the love with Seonghwa than actually being physically a part of the relationship in a way?

but Seonghwa doesn’t necessarily seem to mind that, they’re this natural pull towards one another

and they will always make the effort for each other, no matter what

but all this daydreaming could also lead to them often not seeing the bigger picture and missing important points

they’re physically very healthy and love the materialistic things in life just as much as they love people

Seonghwa seems to be looking for someone successful and finds that in his fs

but his fs will always be kinda harsh on themself

they work a lot and hard but it’s never enough for them

but they work hard to get all the nice and fine things they want in life

however, they always stay grounded. You’ll never catch them bragging or flexing

instead, they kinda want to share their bits with the world as well

they’re very generous towards others

they’re hard to break down, and if they’re on the ground, they will move on with grace like nothing happened

could work in the entertainment industry as well, potentially works in front of a camera

they’re very good with their words, they know how to properly articulate themself

they’re very busy, always working on something and sometimes struggle taking time for themself

extremely seductive, and have like a dark mysterious vibe

I’m getting quite a lot of sexual energy as well

like they have two sides - a joyful light and happy one but also a dark one that only Seonghwa will truly see

because they will truly love each other

Love,

~Nicky 🫧

Masterlist

[deep-space-lines]

re. your tags on that amazing gabriel/v1 comic: i'm not a biblical scholar but i AM a religious studies scholar and let me tell you that all your interpretations & the questions you bring up are super bangin. i love this so much. i wish i could send this to my 40 yr old thesis advisor (who IS a biblical scholar and also loves video games) but i would have to explain the gay sex game to him so . maybe not. anyway rest assured that there are biblical scholars in the world who would eat this shit up

oh ok so this is probably one of the coolest things anyone's ever said about my art ever. reading this brought back the joy of getting a graded essay back with a gold star sticker on it thank you

this is super validating honestly, & just the overall positive feedback on that comic-- not to get Personal but it's so much harder for me to post anything i put a lot of genuine thought/effort into as opposed to silly doodles because of the little voice in my head that says "what if everyone thinks this thing you poured a part of your soul into is stupid and bad forever". for me that gets amplified like tenfold with writing or anything where i'm actively trying to communicate something more complex. drawing something pretty is easy, but creating something that'll make an idea resonate with other people the same way it resonated with me when i'm not even sure it makes sense is HARD and i'm really glad i apparently managed to pull it off this time

so yeah thank you very much. i absolutely could not have predicted that buying the silly robot game a month ago would lead to someone saying "there are biblical scholars in the world who would eat that shit up" about something i drew but i'm not complaining. its scary but... maybe i'll start posting some writing on here sometimes <3

[fayes-fics]

hey! it’s Yearning Nonny again - but today I am not yearning for romance, but yearning to understand what on EARTH went through that requestor’s mind when sending you that message?!

I won’t waste any energy on them, instead putting it into telling you this: Faye, you are a FANTASTIC writer. I had a dumb smile on my face through so much of that fic

Also, you are completely correct - you do this for free! You had no obligation to fill out that request at all, and if you took inspiration from it to write then that’s more than is expected of you! (or should be, because followers are NOT owed work by creators). Also also - you’re not a mind reader, how can you ever write exactly what someone had in mind when creating a request?

The whole thing is madness to me - overall, I hope you’re okay after all this. Please ignore that one comment as much as you can (easier said than done, I know!) and do whatever brings YOU joy!

Sending you internet hugs 🫶

Hi Yearning Nonny! 🫶

You are simply the sweetest 🥹🫶

I’m so pleased you enjoyed that fic. It was meant to be a lighthearted comedy. I do not subscribe to the notion that only angst/drama is profound/“good” writing, especially with romance.

Every writer gets some rubbish thrown at them at some point, but that it was from the requester really threw me for a loop. Indeed I am not a mind reader, but I wish I was - I would have jettisoned that request if I knew the sort of person it was from lol.

Thank you for your kind, supportive words. Overall my experience of the fandom has been positive - I’ve met lovely people such as yourself - so I will try not to let one entitled person ruin it for myself and others. 😁

I will only write the requests I want to moving forward, rather than feeling obligated to people who, as it turns out, are sometimes undeserving of our effort/output.

Hugs back to you my dear 😁🧡🧡

[jaywritesrps]

I saw this post on L Chat and I wanted to share here cause it was very accurate. I am going to cut some parts too invasive, but the rest is a good point:

"Okay, can you all chill a little about Sophia and Ashlyn? We know nothing more than what we know already, and there's too much here that is just stuff people create in their heads and others believe for nothing. Many of the info you are spreading we will never know if it's true or not cause it's not our damn business.

About Sophia's lovelife, herself and her friends talked a couple of times about this subject. She said herself that she had two major flaws: she is too gullible (as in she can see the other person flaws, but she ignores it and chooses to focus on the person's positive traits rather in the negatives) and she is/was a people's pleaser, which makes her doing whatever it takes to fit in on the expectations on her (you can get these infos on her both podcasts and in her interviews. But if you don't feel like looking cause they are a lot, watch the interview she gave to Michael Rosembaum in 2021, which is one of the a few times she talks about CMM, and the one she gave to Jameela Jamil two months ago) Hilarie confirmed this in one of the early episodes of Drama queens when she told that one of the problems her and Sophia had in the first seasons of OTH was cause Hilarie said straight on her face what was going to happen in her relationship with Chad Michael Murray and Sophia got pissed at Hilarie for trying to warn her. Many fans pointed that pattern too at each new relationship she made public.

Now focusing only in her marriage with Grant, this happened with him too. Many fans pointed out that she seemed a lot more into him than he was into her. You could see she was putting too much effort and not getting the same in return. In Grant's defense, I think he was relief when she asked for the divorce, cause he was very quick to erase any sign of her existence or their marriage in his IG. Prior the rumors of her being with Ashlyn started, and even prior to Cannes, many of her likes from IG were about stopping letting people making you feel small and unwanted, or to stop letting other's define you or tell you how you should feel or invalidate your feelings. So the marriage was faded to die, Ashlyn was just the last drop.

With that being said, this relationship between them is far too new to anyone say anything yet or to determinate how their dynamics are or even if Sophia or Ashlyn are repeating their patterns.

So far, the solid things we have are:

1) they are a couple

2) they went to Rapinoe's retirement party as a couple

3) they went to Big Sur together

4) they did tattoos together

5) they are balancing schedules to spend time

6) Sophia looked happy in the events she went and in recent podcasts while Ashlyn is avoiding the drama from fans, that are fed by cryptic messages from Kyle Krieger, focusing on attacking solely Ashlyn (If you think about it, we didn't heard Ali's side of the story directly from her, cause the only thing she did was posting a vague message and let the internet helldogs create stuff. But she didn’t really said anything, which per se is weird overall)

7) it looks like it's a serious deal for them

Anything outside of these is pure speculation. We didn't even have one picture of them as a couple to try a guess of how they are, the only thing out is just posts on social media that is being taken out of context to stir more drama and people online are falling very quick in this non-sense, already claiming that Ashlyn is broken and Sophia is paying her bills, or that Ash is going to live in California with Sophia or that Ashlyn was fired from Gotham.... None of these are true and it's also none of our business. I know this is a forum and a place for conjectures, but conjecutures are just guesses, nothing more nothing less, they are not true and we can't know if they are because none of us have the big picture, and probably not even Sophia and Ashlyn have that figured out just yet. So chill out, okay"

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1123: Sharin' the View Together (Persona 4 Arena)

7:34 p.m. at Shichiri Beach........

Teddie: (Let's Out a Relaxed Sigh as He Watches the Sunset Alongside his Girlfriend Labyrs) Isn't the sunset beautiful in this time of day, Labby-chan?~

Labrys: Sure is. It's bright, orange, shows off it's reflection on the ocean pretty well. Kinda makes ya forget that summer's about to come to a close.

Teddie: (Places his Hand Onto his Chest in a Very Dramatic Fashion) 'Tis a shame for a joyous season to come to a tragic end!~ And even bigger shame that I, Teddie Haramura III, have fail to achieve my goal to become big and muscular!~ And less scary than Kanji-Kun.

Kanji: (In the Distance) Oi!

Labrys: (Snickers at her Overly Dramatic Boyfriend) Simmer down a bit there, Shakespeare, there's always next year. And I'm sure you'll be able to grow a muscle or two one of these days, not like need 'em to begin with.

Teddie: (Sits Back Down) Yeah, but have you seen Inaba's Finest Weekly? (Picks the Magazine Up Beside Him and Shkws Labyrs a Page or Two) Research states that over hundred ladies would rather go out with guys who are more manly and have beary huges muscles and biceps than those with skinny bones.

Labrys: (Shrugs) Then that's their preference, ain't no changing that. (Forms a Seductive Smirk on her Face) But me personally, I like my man sweet, handsome, a little on the skinny side....(Playfully and Gently Pinches Teddie's Cheek) And an overall cutie~

Teddie: (Giggles Ticklishly While Blushing) Oho Labby-Chan!~ You always know how to make my day even more brighter with your kind words~

Labrys: (Smiles Brightly) Well, everything I say is the truth, ain't it? I love ya to pieces, Ted!~

Teddie: And I love you pieces as well, my dear magnifique princesse~

Labrys: Ah~ I see your French is startin' to get better there~

Teddie: (Smiles Proudly as He Begins to Sparkle) You notice~ I work my absolute hardest to perfect my fluent in the language of romance!~

Labyrs: (Goes Back to Smirk) Just to try and impress me?~

Teddie: (Let's Out a Loud Gasps Before Pouting and Turning Away woth his Arms Crossed) To become a respectful gentleman, thank you! ('Sighs in Defeat') But to....also impress you, yes.

Labrys: (Chuckles Lightly as Put her Her Arm Around Her Teddie and Pull Him into Loving Hug) You are such a casanova dork!~ But I appericate your efforts though~

Labrys starts kissing up on Teddie's cheek, causing him to giggle once more, for a few seconds before taking a look back at the bright, orange sunset in question.

Labrys: ('Sigh') But yeah, the sunset here does look gorgeous. 'Sure 24 would love to see this too.

Teddie: (Turns to Labrys With a Bit of a Confused Look on his Face) 24?

Labrys: She's a friend of mine from way back, the first friend I've ever made to be exact. (Begins to Frown) A friend who's......not here with us right now.

Teddie: (Frowns as Well as He Realizes What Labrys Meant by her Wording) Oh no....I'm so sorry for your loss, Labby-Chan.

Labrys: (Smiles a Bit Sadly at her Boyfriend) Thanks, 'hun, but really, don't worry it. It's been like, what? A few years since she been gone? I've already made my peace with that since then. (Looks Back at the Sunset) And I'm definitely sure she wouldn't want me to sit around and mope about it all day n' night. Best I can do is to honor her wish and keep livin' my life forward from here, till the bitter end or whateva'..

Teddie: (Gives Labrys a Reassuring Hug and Smile) And I'll be more than happy to stand by and live through life with ya, Labby-Chan. There's still a lot we don't know about the world around us, but I'm 1005% positive that we'll get to experience all of it in no time!~

Labrys: (Snickers Some More) Don'tcha think you lotta percentage ya got there, Ted?

Teddie: Why, of course!~ How else am I gonna show you how beary serious I am?

Labrys: Welllllll, you could be a gentleman and give momma some kisses~

Teddie: Hmmmm....... Seems like a pretty tall order. (Smirks Seductively) But if it's a request made by my beloved knight princesse, then who am I to refuse?~ (Starts Kissing Up on his Girlfriend)

Labrys: (Giggles Ticklishly by Teddie's Love and Kisses) Your French is startin' to lose it's edge already, Teddie Bear!~

????: Hey! Lovebirds!

The couple cease their romantic antics for a sec as their turn their attention to Kanji, Naoto and Nanako in the mid distance, picking up their stuff for today.

Kanji: We're about leave soon, so quit foolin' around already!

Nanako: (Smiles Brightly) Dad just called. He already sliced up the watermelon for us! Cone on!~

Teddie: Oooh!~ Watermelon Slices!~ (Gets Up From his Seat)

Labrys: What do they test like again? Been wantin' to test onr for myself, but I never got around into doin' so before.

Teddie: It's only the most yummiest fruit ever made on this planet!~ Unless you put salt on it. Then it'll taste salty and bitter. (Offers Labrys his Hand)

Labrys: (Accepts her Boyfriend's Gesture as He Helps Get Herself Up on her Feet) Really now? And does it has the same taste effect when ya put pepper on it?

Teddie: (Starts Walking Towards His Friends While Holding Onto his Girlfriend's Hand) You know, I'm not sure. Yousuke used to forbid me from laying a single finger on the pepper shake, so I never know what it'll taste. Ooh! Do you think we should combine that with the salt with one of our slices when we get back?

Labrys: Teddie, that's the craziest idea you ever thought of. (Smiles Brightly) I'm in.

Teddie: Ye!~

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