#I am procrastinating thats why
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"tot leo this, baby turtle that" what if I turned him into a single celled organism huh what would you do then
#2 arms left#nonsense#why did I made this lmaoooo#I am procrastinating thats why#me: I want to have a clean blog and only post important stuff#because I dont want to clutter it for anxiety purposes#also me:
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Ok 141 beach day and everyone gets burnt to a crisp
#i made the rest of them hahaha#task force 141#call of duty modern warfare#simon riley#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#john soap mactavish#john price#idk ive never made a group post#price def made a sloppy attempt at sunscreen but thats it#i am procrastinating#why do you ask#my art#procreate
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no ponytail for mind 😔
#chonny jash#angelo tag#i am procrastinating so bad#i forgot to duplicate the second mind thats why its low opacity oops
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university library wip
#sims 3#sims#ts3#s3#hello i am tired#uni is hard man#so if u dont hear from me for a few more weeks thats why 😭#but who knows maybe procrastination will kick in and ill be back
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many days and several breakdowns into sorting through recipes and trying to contact people i have just realised this is the kind of job i can do while watching youtube videos
#i can't do it if i have to like write something because i need to focus#thats why i suck at writing because i generally can't focus unless i'm multitasking but i can't think clearly enough to write#if i'm watching/listening to something#and i also can't do it if i'm video editing like i know a lot of people do but personally the overlapping audio would make me kill myself#but right now it's just organising and mostly copy pasting messages so wow.... i get entertainment yay :)#why am i typing all this literally who gaf#god i love procrastination
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tf2 shitposting again
#tf2 scout#tf2 spy#team fortress 2#tf2#tf2 fanart#tryna figure out how to draw him properly#i still havent drawn engie yet? idk why#procrastination is the name of the game#i came up with this before i found out that apparently the majority of the tf2 fandom are NOT spy fans#or#at least thats what ive seen#i mean like as in being attracted to him#i mean. idk#judging from the polls#i am definitely a spy fan#hes an arrogant selfish old man#but hes kind at heart#and thats all that matters to me#im still no. 1 sniperspy fan btw#working on. a fic as we speak#i WILL push forward#feeling extremely self conscious abt my art i did this in 10 minutes sorry its bad
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#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#good heavens.... .#lobotomy corporation spoilers#SOMEHOW#lobotomy corp spoilers#carmen lobcorp#listen. i have an explanation okay. it doesnt make sense but it was funny in my head#adam has an earing. thought it would be funny if it was just from ayin . is it? not quite sure#text explanation carmen wanted to do diy piercings in the outskirts and ayin went 'nuh uh safety issues' before caving and#making her practice and do it first on him to make sure it goes well and taken care of correctly before she does it on herself#thus the one ear piecing is born. the alternative joke was that it was just clip on. am i going to question the clothing? nah#mind fuckery the facility is made outa thay too. could that also be for the earing and tatoo? yeah. is it more funny to me thos way? yeah#no idea how the hell adam speaks by the way we ball w that . tatoo is just a sharpie as well dont know why there would be any way to put ink#to skin in an efficient manner. besides mind fuckery which is also totally acceptable but null for the sake of shitty comedy#adam lobcorp#ayin lobcorp#thats it. yup. the only spoilers i have is ayins appearance and name actually. only thing i knew going in. so i suppose this will do#(im procrastinating day 49 i know i can do it but im in agony thinking abt it)#also thought it funny at the idea of an piercing made by carmen's hands ending up being used by the facet of A that is carrying out her will#even still even if it is in the most absurd and irrational way possible. wanting to give freedom and realization and the ability to not#have to just survive but be free to live inside the world with their desires and wants in the most 'purest' and 'strongest' form for all#even if it is a SHIT PLAN!!! established broken man whayever ill bully adam regardless
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"Poor og elias he just wanted to smoke pot"
I'm not saying you cannot like him I know people like that were here before unfortunately, but like don't overlook some parts of the little we have yknow?
#yes there are other aspects of this i am not mentioning here that make him kinda relatable to people but thats not what this post is about#tma#og elias bouchard#listen i know i know why am i starting THIS again and tbh i am procrastinating
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pro tip: if you think you have adhd then don't start a master's program before you even get a diagnosis (also you need a stronger prescription, you have astigmatism, and reading glasses aren't gonna cut it)
#i can handle one class just fine but 2 classes??? im killing myself#im working too so its like i never have time for myself and its just a neverending well of assignments and work plus i hate the schedule#why is everything due at 10:59 and why is it due in the middle of the week but i have to come back the next 2 days and write responses#one of my classes will trade out a disucssion for the week with an assignment thats due at the end of the week and i like that sm better#the other class makes use do a discussion and an assignment in the same week#and usually they're all due at the same time so i go to work and then go home do my homework and then do more homework on the weekend#then go back to work do you understand my problem#anyway my mom casually confirmed that i have astigmatism recently which ???#but my eyesight is fine but driving in the dark is hell and its not b/c of the dark!#any kind of bright light blinds me like it could be a sunny day and i won't be seeing shit for that entire drive omg#just realized that this might be the cause of an increase in headaches wait...#ok back on track: adhd consultation (maybe) in a month and a half!#i don't have a therapist so im hoping my doctor can help? or at least refer me to somebody that can help b/c looking is hard omg#where the therapists at omg#moon posts#long one today because i am procrastinating so i can give up <3
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gonna try and see if i can sell some stuff at this store nearby, theyve got a few things by local artists and literally had branch weaving, which ive done ! ive taught other people how to do it even ! and was just thinking, hey, i could make some small handspun things and they could maybe sell them ? i got the owners card from the cashier and a little advice and everything
#and a plant. thats why i went#its primarily an indoor plant store and i want. all of the plants#i now have 2 plants in my room !#was not a smart choice to walk there at all ! only 4 blocks away but good god. aughhh.#anyway. i might make a little prototype of something ? and take a picture and send an email#i would rather do that about a million times more than emailing my pcp about getting a wheelchair prescription#which every time i think about it makes me feel like i am about to die. whereas crocheting a little bag sounds fun#so. :)#i love to procrastinate important things. i also have not unpacked at all or canceled the internet at the old apartment
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For my hmmk peeps who lost that poll, how about a wip?
#honestly#If I really sit down and focus I could probably get this done in a day#there's nothing too complicated#well thats a lie#herlocks hair iS DRIVING ME INSANE AHHHHHHHH#and probably why I've been procrastinating back to this#the only down side to hmmk u_u stupid fluffy anime hair gughuhuh#anyways#i AM drawing maid Ryu rn :3 hehe
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back on that owl house daemon au editing grind (ive been busy + writing other stuff so after editing one i sorta. stopped for a month or two lol) and. oh god i knew 2 was gonna be bad but its BAD yall. like not content-wise a lot of the actual writing + plot is totally fine and will stay but. i wrote this before i got into my grove of episode, inbetween, episode (ie 1 -> 1.5 -> 2) SO. THAT MEANS. THIS ENTIRE 30K THING IS GETTING SPLIT INTO 1.5 AND 2.....
and obvi i'll have to write a LOT bc the parts going into 1.5 and 2 are spread across the entire fic :) so uh. um. this is gonna be fun.
#chatter#and a grove of palistrom to you#lol once im done w arc one its gonna be smooth sailing#BUT THATS ASSUMING I SURVIVE ARC ONE--#anyways if you ever have wanted to ask about this au cause it'll be coming out within a month or two#i am sooooo down to procrastinate <3#at this point it doesnt even have to be about the story idc i'll talk about my writing process. anything#i dont...want...to do this....#two you are going to be the DEATH OF ME#also 2 is the worst of arc one cause the rest needs edits for luz/mari consistency for sure#BUT NOT I HAVE TO WRITE TWO NEW STORIES LOL#like 3.5 doesnt exist but i know what it has to be. oh and i guess 5 needs a bunch of stuff added but.#adding is way easier than having to chop up what exists and figure out what can stay#what is dropped#and all the new stuff i have to write to connect things#I LOVE THIS AU. I TRULY DO. BUT GOD EDITING IS SO ROUGH#this is why the last 500k+ word fic i wrote is never getting posted lol#i could Not edit all of that. only for you owl house daemon au
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im wildly fucking anxious right now and i dont know what to do about it
#speaking#ive pinned down that part of my procrastination problems are bc thinking abt what i need to get done makes me feel like im being hunted#for sport so like. i havent worked on buying a car and forgot to plan how to get to my job#bc i didnt Forget its that every time i thought abt it i started to get level 8 anxious so id just Avoid thinking abt it#but this is my last week at this job and im so fucking scared#like wildly scared. like the only reason im not fully backing out of changing jobs is bc thats emberrassing.#and i cant tell how much is unnecessary anxiety or what#i feel so awful rn#i really should probably get into therapy. but thats ALSO scary why is everything so scary!!!!!#i am abt to cry rn but i will not instead i will clean bathrooms 👍
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the feeling of using an alphabet/cipher you haven't used in a few months and starting to slip back into the rhythm until you can write smoothly without checking the translation > literally almost any other feeling ever.
mayhaps yall will see what this is in a bit
maybe
(no, its not a linguistic translation. I'm not THAT feral (yet). its still just english. mostly.)
#what level of college application stress am I on? the one where I procrastinate with THIS and say “mayhaps yall”#as thought thats an even remotely hinged combination of words#yes i made a shorthand version of enochian a few months ago. the original one was meant for a brush and ink okay#just bc im writing this w a calligraphy pen doesnt mean i have to use said pen correctly#ciphers#calligraphy#why#art shit#supernatural fanfic#....yup. that is fanfic#kinnie
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guys help me im really suffering here
#ive read so many fics w the worst secondhand embarrassment today im about to lose my mind over it#do i do this to people. am i too a perpetrator of this crime#why do ppl write it. how do ppl write it. i think id throw up if i tried writing it on purpose bc id just give MYSELF it#should i write secondhand embarrassment????????#is that a thing i should know how to do#im making this post to procrastinate picking back up thef ic thats giving me secondhand embarrassment can you tell
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...
#theres a quote somewhere abt an adviser of a religious leader in... maybe the middle ages? where the adviser is like: we need to convert X#group of people gently. if we force our beliefs down their throats they may just expell it back up#and im thinking abt it bc thats how my brain engages with things. like: oh i like a thing. i must consume as much info abt it as possible#right this very fucking second. and then suddenly its very stressful and my brain tries to reject it#but i cant bc the fucking metaphorical evangelical in my brain is like: no. u fucking listen to me#and im just like 😵💫#which is to say that i didnt sleep much last night and overdosed on 0ne piece. which was not a good move bc now i just feel terrible#which i knew would happen bc i was like hm reading this fic sounds like a bad choice. lets fucking gooooo#and then i fucking trigger myself lmao. partly bc of the material in the fic and partially bc the last time i was reading 0ne piece fics i#was a lot more fucked in terms of my lack of self awareness. so it kinda inherently makes me think of back then and im like oh yea i used#to do X bad thing. i should go back to doing that lol. and its like No. stop. fucking. no#make better choices for the love of god. ugh fuck ive got too much i didnt sleep enough energy#im sure ill burn out way hard by the end of the day. channel that energy. channel that energy into finding an apartment in a fucking city#with a fucking housing shortage 😭 i dont wanna go back to having roommates. nooooooooo 😭😭😭#bleh. im procrastinating going to work. work that i am voluntarily doing for no fucking reason except thst i have issues with#compulsive behavior lol. not lol. sad face 😭 hhhh im vibrating. i wanna run around in circles. why cant i be like this when i actually go#for runs >:-[ im always to fucking brain saturated by then and its a ll static and bees in my head#whatever. time to get tf up and take measurements#unrelated#lmao y did i start this with allusions to a religious quote i dont fucking remember hahahaha#ah its bc i find the contrast of serious academic and philosophical topics funny when i go from thinking abt them to fucking anime and#my petty bullshit. idk i habe a weird sense of humor maybe
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