#I am also not dead

[goldenslumbersfanfiction]

something spicy

🌶️ Chapter 2: Simmer

Dani walks into the kitchen, stopping short when she sees Jamie. “Oh! Jamie—hi!” Dani exclaims breathlessly as she enters, her white Keds practically skidding on the floor as she stops. Jamie wipes her hands on a bar towel and slowly faces her. “Hey.” Jamie hopes it comes out calmer and more collected than she feels, seeing Dani again before her now in the bright kitchen lights after an entire day of trying not to think about her at all. She offers Dani a quick smile because the last time they saw each other, they were arse naked in Jamie’s bed, and she’s not a complete monster. Dani smiles back; thank Christ.

[catmask]

does anyone have like an anti aesthetic. like something you look at and can recognize as a complete fashion/interior design/artistic movement and understand it but it makes you shudder seeing it. i am not talking like “its morally bad” “its poorly structured” like just sheerly devoid of joy for you actually invites a repulse response.

[hinamie]

unconditionally

[technically-human]

It's not complicated, it's just weird

[spinaholi]

sandra lynn’s dating history now includes:

the most red-flag, gaslighting, married guy who became a world renowned insidious televangelist and ruined her perception of love and self-worth

the saddest, wettest, cardboard-box-living, yogurt covered man with an ancient hereditary curse of bad luck

the arch devil of gluttony and living embodiment of insatiable desire and hunger

a former drug addict, high school student councillor, werewolf, who’s probably the most mentally healthy person to ever exist

sexy pirate

[ciil]

what makes us any different?

[ikiprian]

Ghost Kitchen (brought to you by criminal entrepreneur, Red Hood)

Danny’s got the easiest job in Gotham.

He works as a fry cook at a shoddily-run, independent burger joint. Hardly anyone comes in, despite prices being criminally low, and portions insanely large, and while the manager looks like the average tough-as-nails ex-con, he lets Danny mess around in the kitchen whenever the place is empty. (Which is often. This place has to be the city’s hidden gem or something!)

Mr. Manager’s the only one ever there with Danny, except for sometimes when his buddies come over to smoke and play cards. Danny would find it shady, except part of his job is not to ask questions. Literally, he was told during the interview.

(It was a weird interview. Why would they need to hire someone who’s been in a gunfight before? Like, he has, but Gotham’s idea of “hirable qualities” is so bizarre.)

So instead he whips up some killer burgers with the frozen ingredients, and basks in the praise as the guys tell him he shouldn’t have, he does too much for this joint, ain’t that friendly!

Now, Danny’s a chef on the newer side. As a teen he’d preferred the look of Nasty Burger over anything with Michelin stars, and he only really took up cooking after Jazz moved out for college. But just like ecto-exposure used to turn the groceries sentient, Danny’s low-level ecto signature imbues all his food with something historically haunted Gothamites just love! And Danny’s never been one to half-ass a job when it makes people happy.

With fresher produce, real meat, Danny’s sure he can take his dishes to the next level. It takes a couple months of badgering, but his manager finally agrees to contact the mysterious store owner, who keeps the place going, despite profits Danny knows have to be in the red.

Danny spends the morning prepping. He pours his heart into his food, eager to impress. The big boss will be here soon, and he wants to prove that despite the dangerous location, this place has real potential!

It isn’t until the Red Hood shows up that Danny realizes he’s been working for a money laundering scheme.

[colourmornings]

Quick note on Charles's speech for fic writers or anyone interested, really.

Charles uses tag questions, where he ends a sentence with a question, doesn't he? I see a lot of "innit" thrown at the end of sentences, which is right, sometimes.

There is unfortunately grammar. First off, if the main verb is negative, the tag will be positive, and vice versa.

When the main verbs in the sentence is a form of "be" or a modal verb (must, could, would, have, will, can, do etc), he's going to repeat that same form at the end of the sentence. An exception to this is a positive main verb of "I am" in which case the tag will be "aren't I?"

"[You're] Not going back to hell, are you?"

"I wouldn't wanna be dead with anyone else, would I?"

"No, we're not going anywhere, are we?"

"Well, I can't see where you're pointing to, can I?"

"We don't want a repeat of the infamous puppy debacle of '94, do we?"

He uses "innit" a lot less than people think, I think. It took me a while to find examples of him saying this, I ended up having to search a transcript. It follows the same rules as above, except the subject is always a thing, or the pronoun "it," and the main sentence is positive, so that the tag can be the negative "innit" (isn't it). *Edit* "innit" is not used as a question! It's mainly used to reinforce a talking point! (Thank you @elizabear). While the other tags are like rhetorical questions, this one is flat tonally and can end with a period, too.

"Boxing's a gentleman's sport, innit?"

"Magical void, innit?"

"That's the injustice we fight, innit?"

When the verb is not one of those above" he uses a form of "do."

"Well, that sounds a lot like you, doesn't it?"

"Wanna keep things professional, don't I?"

Charles also ends a lot of sentences with just the word "yeah."

"Psychic thing makes case work go a lot faster, yeah?"

I am usamerican, but I have a masters in Linguistics. People who actually use tag questions, though, please add on or correct me!

[hughmanbean]

Blue Screen

Danny is the type of guy gal ghost to Commit To a Bit. This is very common knowledge

But he may have overdone it this time.

---

Dan and Ellie had met the Red Hood, who seemed yucky. Ellie said this herself. Jason was not amused, and did not appreciate them following him around for the rest of the week.

After a bout of panic, Danny had finally tracked the tykes down. After seeing who they were with, he sighed. Of course those two would. Well he could play at that game.

Danny had popped in and pecked him on both sides of the helmet, leaving a casual lie before legging it.

"Hey hun, thanks for watching the kids. I'll take it from here."

---

It's been a month now, and somehow he has two kids with a notorious crime boss and goes on nightly dates with him.

[dextheartist]

They were so in love in this scene

[cosmosnout]

The real reason Oda had to get rid of her was not for plot convenience, but bc she would have kicked everyone’s ass. (Source: trust me bro)

[libraryleopard]

the cat king being desire's son is a great headcanon but also given that the other child of desire in sandman is part of a multi-decade scheme to topple dream of the endless i think it would be funny if desire considers him kind of a family disappointment because he just seems to hang out in this one town in the pacific northwest being dramatic. yeah this is my son he hasn't gotten close to destroying reality even once. he lives in an abandoned warehouse. he's hung up on an uptight edwardian ghost who won't even give him the time of day. cringe.

[kiisaes]

apple of my eye 🔪

[chiscribbs]

My brain literally would not let me rest until I got this out of my system, so here we are.

Okay, so - Future Donnie's canon design sure is a thing. I actually love the concept, mechanic aesthetic is great for Don, but I'm not crazy about the all-black waders/overalls they're just...they're a choice. Definitely a choice. So I figured it was time to update those old Future Donnie designs I made awhile back (which, surprisingly, weren't too far-off? I got the pants pockets right at least, lol)

Here are some of my own takes on the new look. I challenged myself to try and stay as close to the canon design's over-all (haha) vibe as I could, so they don't differ too drastically. Just a few alternative ways to do basically the same concept. For funsies.

***Zero disrespect intended towards Andy, for the record. He's giving us the content we've all been craving and he's the realest one for that! (Also, the overalls aren't that bad, tbh? I think it's just the all-black inking that makes them look kinda off in the preview image.) Still super excited for the full comic to finally be released AAAAAAAA!!

[lucabyte]

i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.

i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.

anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.

[birrdies]

carry yourself through the frozen desert, empty your thoughts into the well of pressure (x)

finally tried my hand at some 3L desert duo designs (ft. matching back scars) !!