#I already lowkey had a crush on him but loving him as a character aside from his looks just feels different | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

idontblushsrry · 4 years ago

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Love Language|| Jujutsu Kaisen

“I wanna be fluent in your love language. Learning your love language.”

A/N: If you didn’t guess from the tagline this is inspired by the song love language by Kehlani. I’ll probably do more of these with different shows and what not because why not. If I missed anyone lmk and I can make a part 2. Also please tag spoilers appropriately esp for manga readers, that being said spoilers for the prequel? manga on Yuuta’s part.

Characters: Itadori, Fushiguro, Kugisaki, Maki, Inumaki, Okkotsu, Gojo, Nanami, Sukuna

Warnings: said it b4 but spoiler warnings in general but esp on Yuuji, Yuuta, and Maki’s parts

Plot synopsis: The 5 love languages; physical affection, quality time, words of affirmation, gift giving and acts of service, and how each jujutsu kaisen character shows their love and affection for you. Ft. a gender neutral reader!

Word count: 2352

Itadori Yuuji

Love Language: Quality time and physical affection

Ok listen-

So for physical affection, Yuuji’s just that kind of person

He is all about giving to you

He’s holding hands with you if you’re ever walking anywhere, and if you’re not a hand holder pls pls pls let him hold your pinky he likes the reassurance

No but seriously he loves to hold you like yall could be walking in completely opposite directions and he’ll try to find some way to hold onto you until the very last second

And even then he’s all ‘:( babe imy’

‘Yuuji we just talked 2 minutes ago’

Another way he shows his love is through quality time

I think for him this is the biggest thing overall, esp as a jujutsu sorcerer bcus you never know yk but also because you’re important to him

Like remember how he literally went to occult club so that he could get out of school in time to go visit his grandpa...ye :(

He also loves finding dumb touristy things to do with you while in Tokyo or anywhere yall go together on a mission

If you get together before he died and came back then that time he had to spend away from you literally killed him

Like my mans was goin THROUGH it

He almost considered spoiling Gojo’s secret

When he sees you again, he’s not gonna let go for like a solid day

Fushiguro Megumi

Love Language: acts of service and words of affirmation

This boy loves you so much

He loves to tell you all the things he loves about you when you’re alone

But he’s a little awkward with his words sometimes, hence where acts of service come in

He’ll immediately offer to hold your things, run to help you train or study, and if you’re cold? He’s fully prepared to never see his jacket again

Also he can’t cook but he’s fully prepared to suffer hearing Sukuna and suffering through Yuuji’s antics if it means he can learn how to make your favorite food

He also will surprise you by making you a playlist of all the songs that you’ve had stuck in your head and sends it to you randomly out of the blue one day like ‘thought you might like this’

However the best of both worlds is when he leaves you little notes throughout the day or sends you texts asking if you need anything or just encouraging you to keep going

Negl he’s lowkey the president of the Y/N support club bcus-

You need anything? It’s yours

Cravings? Sad? Angry? What do you need bby, I’ve got it for you

Also he’s totally the type to be like you need help fuckin this person up?

Also before yall started dating, Fushiguro was a mess

He was constantly asking to spar with you and go on missions, basically anything he could do to be near you

End of the day, Fushiguro loves you and makes sure you know it whether it’s through his actions or his words

Kugisaki Nobara

Love Language: physical affection

So, she’s not the best with words, she tries but like someone help her bcus she is LOST

Like when she had a crush on you she was like “c’mere dumbass i wanna give you a hug”

In fact, she still is like “c’mere” but now you are dating :)

She loves you though and at first she doesn’t really know how to show it

But one day you both come home from training and you just look at each other like ‘yeah today sucks’ and yall both just held each other for the rest of the day

After that, she decided that she wants to do that with you but like always

She’s holding your hand, kissing your cheek when you go shopping, etc. etc.

She really loves to cling to you because she always has this fear that maybe one day you’ll get killed or just disappear so she figures might as well hold onto you for as long as we’ve got

After missions, she’s running up to you and if you aren’t prepared for the tackle, you’re probably gonna fall

On dates too, like if you guys have to meet up for a date, she’s tackling you

On the subject of dates...

She doesn’t mind PDA, and while she might hold your hand or arm so that you don’t get separated

She also doesn’t mind wiping food off your face and eating it, only to then kiss the spot on your face the food was previously at

She will split her shopping load between the two of you, however she will be slightly pouty if she’s carrying more than you (she then cheers up when she realizes she can do more shopping to “balance” the two of you)

In private she’s very cuddly and kissy which honestly isn’t that bad until it gets hot

At which point she’ll just say turn on the ac or convince you to walk around in a tank top (or something like it) so that she can continue holding you

Tbh she prefers the big spoon, but if she’s ever upset you let her be the little spoon >:(

All in all a very loving girlfriend who tries her best to show how much she loves you by glomping you at any given moment.

Zenin Maki

Love language: acts of service and quality time

So you’re telling me that Maki wouldn’t immediately go out of her way to make sure her and her s/o can spend as much time together as possible?????

Like she’s super observant (which can cause her to be a bit harsh, see Yuuta) but she can always tell what’s bothering you

So if you’re upset that you haven’t been spending enough time together due to her being out on missions or otherwise busy she’s immediately running to finish her stuff and spend time with you.

((She’s very sorry, but on the bright side she brought your favorites!))

Maki is also an acts of service type

This mostly ties in with her kind of direct action way of thinking

She thinks she’s slick but you can always see her sneaking around to do small things like grabbing your laundry for you and folding it

She’s very much like if you love someone, you gotta prove it

Overall, dates with her are very intimate and personal to the two of you

Like she’ll take you to a frog pond you landed in during a fight once

Or you’ll take her to a street fair that serves this exclusive food that Maki mentioned wanting to try

However, Maki shows her love through quality time and acts of service and while she does receive love from these to a degree, she is very much a words of affirmation gal

She’s not insecure in her day to day life but she has her moments, everyone does

Sometimes, she’ll feel like shit and a failure and all she wants is for you to say that she’s doing amazing and that she’s a great girlfriend.

Inumaki Toge

Love language: Physical affection

Because of his curse, he can’t exactly express how he feels about you through words

He does text you frequently throughout the day (I’ll have to do a hc abt that someday)

But he’d prefer not to be on his phone to communicate if you’re right in front of him

So he does the next best thing and just smothers you in physical affection

He loves kissing you the most

Like he could spend hours just kissing you if you let him (please let him)

But in public, he gets if you’re not a big fan of pda he’s willing to tone it down as long as he gets kisses later in private

He’d still prefer it if you held his hand or linked pinkies maintaining touch in some way

Also, unrelated, but it means so much to him if you try to understand his sushi language

He knows realistically the foundation of any relationship is communication so already he’s at a disadvantage because of his curse

But if he sees you like take notes after he says something or start to need him to text you to translate, his heart is swelling

Like ‘omg this person loves me enough to learn a whole new language <333′

Another tangent but before you were together he was struggling so muchhhh

Like how does one express their feelings for someone without words?

If you’re Inumaki, you buy some flowers and text said person to meet you at a cafe

It took an embarrassingly long time for you to realize it was a date, but once you did, you ever so gently linked pinkies with Toge

Okkotsu Yuuta

Love language: words. of. affirmation.

He’s literally so sensitive please tell him you love him regularly

In return he’ll be sure to tell you how much he loves you too

He knows that he can’t really be there for you as much as he’d like but he likes to let you know that he’s thinking of you

Doesn’t matter the time, if you call, he’s answering

If he doesn’t he’ll cry he’ll immediately call you back and is apologizing for missing your call

You assure him it’s no big deal but the man has his volume turned all the way up and changed your ringtone to one specific for you by the time you’ve even said hey

Aside from that, he really is sensitive

He’s been through a lot especially with Rika as well as growing up alone and bullied

So for him, it’s everything to hear that you like having him around and don’t think he’s too much or anything like that

Of course, he gets better with time, trusting you and having the confidence in himself to not need constant assurance

That being said, if you ever just whisper in his ear, “I love you, Yuuta.”

That’s not your boyfriend, that’s a puddle of love on the floor

(Maki, Panda, and Inumaki had a field day when they saw him, Fushiguro now questions if Yuuta really is a respectable 2nd year.)

Gojo Satoru

Love language: gift giving and quality time

So Gojo doesn’t exactly get to spend a ton of time

Between missions, him beefing with higher ups, and you and him playing parent the baby sorcerers yall don’t exactly get time to go out much

In which case Gojo tends to default to two options:

He’ll either go the extra mile to try and spend time with you

Whether that be an at home date where he tries and fails to surprise you with a home cooked meal

Or a date out at a restaurant or cafe (which you tend to visit after his home cooking efforts)

OR he’ll bring you various souvenirs from his missions

He loves to spoil you, and if he could he’d probably bring you back a whole store’s worth of stuff

But alas, airport security regulations

Anyways, he loves to spoil you especially if he can spoil you with sweets because it benefits him in two ways

He treasures all the time you spend together, and he does try to overcompensate for his absence with gifts

Despite your assurances, it’s kind of a guilty pleasure at this point (just let him, trying to argue just goads him on further)

He doesn’t only buy you small things, he enjoys buying you outfits

And he especially likes seeing you in them

Kento Nanami

Love Language: acts of service

Y’all remember the episode where he killed that curse that was bothering that baker lady?? Yea that

He’s literally such an acts of service boyfriend it’s not even funny

Before you got together, he would memorize your coffee order and bring you a cup pretty much everyday like clockwork

Now that you’re togehter, he wakes up before you so h=that when you wake up there’s the smell of coffee throughout the house

When you come out of you’re shared bedroom and he’s just scrooling through his phone like “mornin’”

Of course you already made the bed and ironed his clothes because relationships are give and take

And then when you leave for your jobs in the morning, he kisses you and holds the door open for you

He’ll draw a bath for you if he gets home before you, if you let him join or not is up to you

Also, if you ever get sick, he’s actually the best

Like he isn’t the best cook but he can heat up soup and tea

He’ll run to the store while you’re asleep and when you wake up, there’s like a whole tray of food in front of you and he’s like ‘it’s important to eat and drink so your body can heal’

And when you inevitably fall asleep after eating and taking medicine at his insistence, he tucks you in and clears away the dishes, exiting with little more than a kiss to your head

Ryoumen Sukuna

Love Language: gift giving and acts of service

So like Sukuna never says he loves you...ever

But he does notice if someone or something’s making you uncomfortable, and if so, said entity’s head will be presented to you later that day

You also just so happen to be the only person he can tolerate being around him for longer than 20 seconds

He also loves to give you jewelry, he likes seeing you adorned in something from him

He also isn’t gonna just handle all your problems for you, he will push you to become stronger by training with you

He’ll also expect this energy to be reciprocated, as long as you’re pushing yourself to be better, he’s content with that

(He wants to see you grow because he’s scared that if he ever gets caught lackin one day you’ll end up dead)

He’ll never tell you or admit it, but Sukuna truly does care for you and hold you in a regard that he doesn’t have for others

So be grateful jkjk

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teklarn · 3 years ago

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𝔂𝓸𝓾'𝓻𝓮 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓶𝔂 𝓫𝓸𝔂𝓯𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭 - 𝓴. 𝓫𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

character(s): katuski bakugou x gn!reader

a/n : y’all this was gonna be for kirishima bc i love possessive kiri but like it works so well with bakugou. first part will be from third pov, following parts will be from second pov (reblogs are greatly appreciated !! <3)

summary: bakugou x gn!reader. they have feelings for one another but have no idea how to express them, however y/n has someone pining for their attention.

genre: uhh idk a lil bit teeny-weeny dash of angst i guess

warnings: mild cursing, possessive bakugou, mutual pining, jealousy, aged-up to third year, possessive y/n, love triangle (square?), implied manga spoilers but not directly stated, tiny bitta tokage slander (sorry lol), slow burn romance (like SLOWWW SLOW BURN), lowkey enemies to lovers, like a lotta tension between bakugou and y/n

word count: 3k

UNEDITED w/ minimal or no typos. i shoved it into grammarly’s ass and prayed for the best okay

here’s pt 2 loves <3

- - -

y/n was used to picking and their skin, irritated at the girls fawning over bakugou. they were always on the sidelines, watching from afar, jealousy warping their heart. could these stupid girls not see that bakugou didn’t even care for their attention?

this time it was setsuna tokage who was begging for his eyes on her. y/n assumed it started in their first year when they’d been put against one another when the classes still had a clashing rivalry. (they still did, much more tame now, however.)

she leaned forwards, tugging on his short sleeve. bakugou’s uniform jacket was slung over one shoulder. he’d lost a lot of his angry demeanor from when he was younger, however it was easy to tell when he was pissed. it was inevitable he wasn’t going to lose his temper entirely.

it was easy to ignore the girls—most of the time, at least. what was ticking y/n off the most was the fact that bakugou didn’t seem pissed at all. his face was neutral, almost like the perfect mirror of todoroki on a daily basis. his eyes were not fired up in his usual ‘get the hell off of me’ manner. he was relaxed.

it didn’t seem like he reciprocated tokage’s feelings, however he wasn’t doing anything to get her off him and it was pissing y/n off to no end.

her sensuous lips were pushed into a slight pucker as she spoke, arching her back in a manner that made it appear much more provocative than she probably intended.

bakugou stood there, eyes flicking from her grasp on his sleeve and back up to her eyes. he didn’t say anything, didn’t move, only kept looking her up and down. not in a romantic way, of course. right?

y/n scoffed at themselves. they swallowed the lump in their throat, shoving down the pinging envy in their chest with it. why wasn’t he reacting?

heat rushed to y/n’s cheeks. why do i care?

tokage was nearing his face. she didn’t have any intent to press her lips to his, which y/n was more than glad for.

y/n had come to the conclusion they had feelings for the explosive boy weeks ago. perhaps they always had, but now that they were fully conscious of them... gosh, it was frustrating.

“you’re staring again.”

y/n turned to see kirishima, the only other person who knew about their feelings for bakugou. he’d lost the twinkle in his eyes after first year. he’d picked up a dominating sneer and a withering glare reserved for anyone who desired to cross his friends. everyone at UA had after what went down. it was a shock most of them survived anything.

“so?” y/n snapped, shoving their hands away and kicking a pebble before them. kirishima and y/n continued their walk through the courtyard.

“so it makes you look creepy.”

“no, it doesn’t. he didn’t even notice me.”

kirishima snapped his fingers. “partially my point here. that’s bakugou katsuki, you really think he’s going to notice you?”

“excuse me?”

kirishima pursed his lips, twiddling his thumbs. “i didn’t mean it like that, y/n. it’s just...well, he has so much to work for.”

y/n raised a brow, questioning his nervous antics.

he continued. “bakugou works hard. probably the hardest worker in UA aside from midoriya. and it’s bakugou. he doesn’t really see a point in relationships. you know that.”

“it’s not like i’m looking for anything with him, though. gosh, kirishima, you’re acting like this is some school girl crush.”

he tilted his head, giving y/n a look that screamed, are you really sure it’s not though?

y/n huffed out a breath, crossing their arms. they’d already vomited up their feelings, why all of a sudden call it a crush? sure, it was a tiny crush that was no larger than the brain of a dinosaur.

“i can swear that it isn’t, kirishima. you’re looking too deep into things,” y/n defended once again.

the red-head held his hands up in surrender, sucking his lips in to avoid another snarky comment slipping out.

the two looked up at the towering building that had been home to them for the past three years: Heights Alliance.

during their second year, the teachers had settled with having the dorms set up in a way that allowed the students’ rooms to be set up in a gender-neutral fashion. they’d been able to select new dorms beside whomever they wished. rooming next to kirishima was a blast, but the only person bakugou wanted to room next to was him.

mina had moved in next to you, and kaminari to her right, and sero right across from y/n.

y/n had no issue being squished between a group notorious for their goofiness and ability to never take anything seriously, however (especially on weekends) they were exceptionally loud to the point they were sure China could hear the blaring music.

friday was finally going to be over in a few hours. y/n felt a giddiness well up inside them, anticipating the weekend. it’d been a rough few days, for everyone, not just them.

class 1A had been bombarded with assignments and pop quizzes. y/n was lucky they finished it all in class. some of the homework was finished when they’d sacrificed their precious free time to get it done, but in the end, it was worth it all.

y/n let their bag sag down their arms as they entered Heights Alliance.

bakugou had just been asked out on a date. for the third time. first time, he’d denied. second time, he had to shove tokage off him. third time, he’d calmly accepted her offer, and she’d skipped away with more than a smile.

she’d squeezed his bicep, gave him a wink and an unnecessary peck on the cheek that bakugou had wiped off the moment she turned her back. he was now in his bathroom and, despite her not wearing any lipstick, he was scrubbing his cheek raw so that the skin was a blotchy red.

the date was tonight, and he found himself wanting to go, and questioning why he accepted in the first place.

bakugou forgot about tokage the second he won that match his first year and tossed her in the cage. he only noticed her when she and her group of friends giggled and passed by. (it was mostly her chortling, but whatever.)

he continued rubbing his cheek aggressively with a scratchy towel. he was repulsed by how he had stood there without bothering to snap at her to leave him alone for the third time.

instead, bakugou’s mind had buffered, and if he was in a video game, he had surely glitched. he should probably just tell tokage he didn’t want to go anymore. in fact, he never wanted to go in the first place and wants to jump out his window and escape.

it was almost comedic. the thought of him going out on a date? goodness, he wanted to throw up.

as he continued scrubbing the cloth along his cheek, bakugou found himself more than grateful for how much his quirk made him sweat. if it wasn’t for the nitroglycerin-like substance he produced, his skin would be scratched and dried up.

a knock sounded at his door. silence came, until the knock found its way to his ears. a set of three knocks, then five, then it was a needy banging.

whoever was on the other side heard his audible groan and shuffling feet dragging across the floor, because they knocked a lot harder.

he swung the door open, hinges crying out.

bakugou’s upper lip curled in disgust. tokage twirled her hair around a finger, eyelashes sticking together with mascara. “katsuki,’ she greeted.

his eyes narrowed on her. “don’t call me that.”

“what should I be calling you, then? baby? or honey?”

oh yes, bakugou wanted to vomit. what even was her name again? whatever, it didn’t matter. “lizard teeth, listen. i-”

“lizard teeth? why would you address me like that?”

“because i don’t know your damn name, alright? i don’t-”

“tokage. need me to spell it out for you?”

“no. shut up. i need to-”

“you should remember it, because i was one of the few who got in through recommendations, remember?”

“and yet here you are in class 1B. can you shut the hell up now?”

“well, you’re just being shitty.”

“why are you here, tokage.” more of a demand than a question, as bakugou’s questions always came across if he ever bothered to ask them.

“because, for our date tonight, I need to pick up some things and I really hope you’re up for coming with me.”

“no.”

“please?”

“no. stop pushing. and I don’t want to-”

“come on, grouchy.” tokage activated her quirk, one scale slipping into his dorm and pushing him towards her. she gripped the collar of his shirt and grinned. “come with me for a short bit, and I’ll count that as our date, m’kay?”

bakugou opened his mouth once more to protest, but tokage silenced him by pressing one slender finger to his lips.

“I’m fully aware you don’t want to go on this date with me.”

he relaxed, shoulders slumping. if bakugou was younger, if he was even just a little bit more stubborn as he had been before, perhaps he’d be out of this mess already, or never in it in the first place.

tokage let her hand fall back to her side—both of them. the scale returned to her lower calf; the jet-black leggings she wore now had a perfect hole in them.

“do you think i’m dense, bakugou?”

“then why ask me out?” bakugou felt himself leaning back.

“because if i can get under the skin of that stupid little...what do you like to call them? stupid little extras? yeah, that stupid extra who can’t stop fluttering googly-eyes at you every minute, then i’ll be perfectly content.”

“who the hell are you talking about?”

“alright, so you are oblivious.” tokage took a step back and crossed her arms. “are you both unaware of how you’ve both been pining for each other’s attention? y/n, that classmate of yours.”

“...y/n?”

“do you know their name or do i have to describe in excruciating detail what they look like?”

“no, no i know who you’re talking about. but you’ve got to be shitting me, alright? there’s nothing there.”

“i’m from 1B, and if there’s something going on in 1A, monoma is going to tell us.”

“shithead, get out of my face.”

“you still have to go out with me.”

“why the f-”

“because, bakugou. if you don’t, i’ll be sure to make sure y/n knows about your feelings, whether they’re real or not.”

“why would they care? more importantly, why would you care?”

y/n kicked their feet up and down, a lollipop in their left hand, phone in their other. kirishima was in his bathroom while y/n was playing a game on their phone. they’d stashed away a bunch of candy back in their dorm and had snatched a handful for the two of them to share while hanging out in kirishima’s.

he was currently combing a hand through his hair, and then proceeded to rummage through his cabinets.

kirishima emerged with his lips puckered. “want to come to the drug mart with me?” he stuck a thumb to his door.

“what for?” y/n didn’t take a glance away from their phone.

“this.” he chuckled softly. when y/n looked up, kirishima had two fingers parting his hair. the roots were a jet black, just growing long enough to become the slightest bit visible.

“you’re going to fry your hair.” they were already shoving their phone away and tossing their sucker into the trash bin.

“it’s a monthly tradition to do this, y/n. it would be fried by now if i was bad at it,” he joked, tapping his roots once more.

y/n laughed alongside him as they exited the room.

it was late, and the lights made everything feel like it was set in a world of backrooms. when the rest of the world is sleeping, it is more than quiet, and nothing feels real―possibly in the best ways.

kirishima scratched at his chin, staring intensely at the hair-dye boxes lined neatly on the shelf before them.

y/n tapped their foot, not out of impatience, but because of the creep staring at them through the aisle. yes, through.

between the boxes of hair dye and scattered makeup products, the beady eyes of setsuna tokage could be seen. she smirked when she tugged her hostage closer.

bakugou’s height had shot up to around six feet in the past two years, so all that was visible was his chest and the black sweatshirt loosely hanging off it, however his grumbling and stream of colorful language was unmistakable. it was him.

“you okay?”

y/n’s head snapped to their friend. “what?”

“you seem on edge. is something wrong?”

“nothing. nothing is wrong.”

“you sure? if you need to talk, i’m here.”

“yeah, yeah, i’m okay. don’t worry.”

“alright.” kirishima held up a box, wiggling it in one hand. “got it.” he gave y/n a toothy grin.

“good.” y/n snatched his arm up and dragged him along.

“woah,” kirishima released a breathy chuckle, tugging his arm back. “what’s got you in a hurry?”

“nothing,” y/n said, shrugging. “just wanna get home.”

gosh, kirishima knew them too well. his eyes squinted just a bit, and there was that playful grin lingering on his lips, just ghosting over his face, barely visible to anyone who didn’t know him. instead of pointing out the obvious, which was standing just a few aisles behind, kirishima decided to play around. “goodness, honey, the kids are going to be fine back home.”

heat raced to y/n’s face. “what?”

kirishima winked. “it’s nice that you care about them, but care about me a little, would’ya? i miss you, too,” he said a tad louder.

this caught bakugou’s attention. his eyes clashed with y/n’s, and he didn’t look away until y/n did. even a few seconds after, y/n still felt the blaring heat of his gaze upon them.

kirishima slung an arm around his friend, enjoying their flustered image. of course, he would never even think about pushing boundaries. the thought never crossed his mind, but he knew they’d let him know if they were uncomfortable.

when y/n looked back as kirishima led them away, bakugou’s jaw was clenched, and his eyes were alight with jealousy.

of course, y/n didn’t notice the emotion flaring.

tokage smirked, clutching his loose sleeve.

y/n looked back to their friend, and kirishima flashed them another knowing smile. bakugou was getting antsy with his best friends’ hands all over y/n. well, not all over, but a tap on the shoulder was enough.

despite the way kirishima’s face dropped, y/n swiped his arm away and wandered over to tokage a bit more angrily than intended. they glanced up to bakugou, who was reaching up to retrieve something for tokage.

“what brings you guys here? didn’t expect to see you.” inside, y/n was screaming. gosh, their heart was angry.

“just running errands together.”

bakugou? going for errands? with tokage?

“cool, cool,” y/n said, nodding. “i was doing the same with kirishima.” they paused, awkward silence filling the space.

impatient as ever, bakugou tossed the item into tokage’s basket and clicked his tongue.

y/n didn’t know why. why were they being so stubborn? despite their protesting thoughts and their entire body screaming to hold back, y/n wrapped their fingers around bakugou’s wrist.

“actually, bakugou, i have something to ask you. i need your opinion on it. you’re smart, right?” y/n’s voice lifted at the end. although they couldn’t see the, what the hell are you doing face kirishima was making behind them as subtly as possible, they could definitely feel the glare burning into their back.

“tch, of course i’m smart, shithead.”

“good.”

“we’re actually kind of in a rush,” tokage spat out, snappier than usual.

“do you think i fight okay? i need someone with a perspective like yours to know if i do.”

“what kind of question is that, dumbass? i don’t care if you can fight well or not, just so long as i can beat the shit outta ya.”

tokage let out a low growl.

y/n smirked, hand still around bakugou’s wrist. “i’d like to know if i can beat you, then, so you can tell me if i’m good or not.”

ohgoshohgoshohgosh where was this coming from?

bakugou squinted. he leaned in closer, like he didn’t hear them. “speak up.”

y/n knew he heard them correctly, but he got awfully close.

feeling a little sneaky themselves, y/n ghosted their fingers over his strong jaw, tilting his head closer so they could speak clearly into his ear. “let’s train together,” y/n said, staring tokage dead in the eyes.

it was a stupid rivalry, really. they’d both been accepted through recommendations. they’d been friends all throughout middle school, and yet when y/n made it into 1A, tokage felt it a necessity to excel at everything and rub it in their face. no way was y/n letting them get away with this.

“i want to see how strong i am.” y/n let their voice drop just a bit. “you’re strong, right?”

“are you taunting me?” bakugou said, voice nearly a whisper. he still hadn’t moved from leaning down and hadn’t bothered to move y/n’s fingertips from his jaw.

“absolutely not.” y/n sent a small grin in the direction of their rival. “let’s just see who can beat who. we’ve never been against one another like this.”

tokage huffed, tugging bakugou back. his eyes were softened when they met y/n’s, and there was simmering, small grin on his face.

tokage, however, looked less intrigued. “he’s not your boyfriend.”

y/n shrugged, already backing away. they spread their arms in a mockery of surrender. “he’s not yours, either.”

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soldmysoultootomeboys · 4 years ago

Text

Demon MC with Human Obey Me Brothers Reverse AU

Okay but what if the brothers were all ‘normal’ humans who ended up summoning a demon, who is MC.

I’m in love with this idea. Lowkey might write a fic about this jk...unless? Levi’s was surprisingly the most fun to write. Also I guess tw for normal demon things??? Nothing too graphic tho

Part 2

Lucifer

As a human he was a high ranking businessman. While still a formal person on the outside he had a perverse interest in the occult that he hid from the rest of his coworkers.

Due to his important position and large pay he manages to get his hands on some rare books on demon summoning. After a lot of research he tries them out.

When he summons you he doesn't look surprised or afraid and is quite clinical about it at first. The first thing he does is bind your powers so they can never be used against him. After he informs the rules you must follow if you're to be living with him.

Even as a human he is quite prideful and controlling and he wants to remind you who's really in charge.

At first he only sees you as a demon. He lets you do your own thing when he isn't ordering you around and when the two of you do go out in public he only introduces you as an acquaintance of his. People are rather surprised at this as he's not the type to walk around with others and rumors quickly fly off about you two.

It's not until you two are walking home from a shopping trip that you really start to bond. It was a late night and no one was around so the two of you take your time, enjoying the cool air and stars.

All too late that you hear the click of a gun. From the shadows steps a man, weapon pointed straight at you. Seeing your nonthreatening human form as well as Lucifer who practically reeks of wealth he thought the two of you easy targets. Wrong.

With inhuman speed you lunge forward shifting into your demon form. The gun clatters to the floor as you rip him to shreds with no remorse. It's only when Lucifer finally calls you away that you realize he's dead.

Once you manage to get home he is immediately lecturing you about how risky the actions you just did were. Someone could have seen you or more importantly seen him. What would you have done if the cops got involved? Eat them?

Once he's done though he thanks you and a few days later a gift ends up in your room. He never claims it, even though you can smell his cologne all over it.

After that night Lucifer treats you different. Not better, but not worse either. If anything he's a bit kinder but in a cold sort of way and he keeps his distance when anything gets too serious. At first you think its because he's scared of you. It isn't till he finally approaches you, a stern look on his face and orders you to transform that you realize he was working up the courage to see what you really looked like.

The pact urges you to turn, so you do and you let him examine you, circling several times. He's most interested in your wings, asking if he could touch them and when you consent he gently runs his hands over them. Despite you being a demon he treats you delicately shifting aside feathers with a careful hand and running a light fingertip over leathery skin.

It's a strange feeling at first, but not bad and you're practically purring by the end

After that he asks to see your true form more and more

Mammon

He didn't mean to summon you.

He just wanted to make a quick buck. It was getting close to Halloween people were starting to be interested in demons and spooks once again. That's why he thought it would be a great idea to start a seance business.

Twenty dollars for him to pretend to summon a demon, maybe shake a table once or twice, have some scary sounds playing in the background, nothing too big. Who would have known that the book he stole as his main prop would really work.

When he first sees you he screams.

He immediately tries to shove you back into the book to no avail. As he has no clue how to get rid of you he ends up stuck with you, a terrifying demon.

At first its very easy (and amusing) to scare him. Bear your teeth, mumble in a made up language, threaten to rip him to shreds.

You can actually see his soul leave his body when he faints.

However in typical Mammon fashion he gets used to you surprisingly quick, especially when you don't come through on your promise to eat him.

After that he figures that together the two of you could start scamming people for even more money. After all, he does own a real live demon now.

You two make bank stealing and tricking people. With his knack for creating schemes and your powers the two of you are rolling in money in no time, although it always seems to be lost pretty quickly thanks to his terrible gambling habits.

It's in the middle of a heist that something goes wrong. Someone, you don't know who you can only hear the click of a revolver, pulls out a gun. With lightning fast reflexes you’re tackling Mammon shielding him with the tip of your wing and just in time as something is shot into it tearing through muscle and sinew.

The urge to rip them to shreds overtakes you, growing with every second that your human is in danger. But there was so many of them and you couldn't protect Mammon and yourself at the same time. The need to get somewhere safe is much more important so you leave.

It's only your quick reflexes that get the two of you out alive.

When you finally get home Mammon laments over all of the money he lost on the deal. acts like it doesn't affect him. His complaints last exactly till he sees the blood staining your form.

He almost faints right there.

Once he recovers he's immediately running to get ice packs and gauze, fussing over your injured wing. It's obvious he’s worried even though he tries to hide it under his tsundere act. When you’re finally bandaged up he thanks you glancing at your wound the entire time.

It's hard not to appreciate the gesture.

You just don't know how to tell him that your going to be perfectly fine in like two days (thank Diavolo for demon healing)

After this you two are a lot closer. Even before you were friends, but now the relationship has morphed into something different.

The two of you do less dangerous scams and while Mammon doesn't act too different he gets super weird when you're too close. Blushing a terrible crimson and freaking out when you touch.

Even for a demon its not hard to see that he has a crush.

Levi

Also summoned you on accident.

He was actually trying to summon Ruri-chan. You have to admit when it comes to her he does his research. Drew a full pentagram and everything and as a final touch placed a little plushy in the middle.

He absolutely panics when you arrive here instead.

Used to humans being afraid you, you ignore him at first. You fall to one knee eager to pledge your loyalty in exchange for his soul when you land on something squishy.

Pulling it out from under you see a plushy??? Of some anime character??? TF???

This pulls him from his stupor and he snatches it from you and begins to lecture you on the importance of Ruri-chan and anime on human culture.

You have no clue whats going on at this point.

When he finally stops talking he actually gets kind of excited. He summoned a hot demon??? Woah! This is just like his anime 'I accidentally summoned a demon from Hell who became my roommate and now I might be falling for them.'

At your confused look he immediately turns it on and has you watch it. You two end up having an entire movie night together.

After that the two of you mostly act like roommates.

He often compares you to his favorite series TSL where 7 humans summon a demon named Henry and go on crazy adventures with him. The first time he accidentally calls you Henry he blushes like crazy.

At first he acted like you were annoying him most of the time but it was pretty easy to catch on to his tsundere act. He actually loves having you around and will whine when you have to leave. He says its because he can't play two player games without you but you know the truth.

On the rare occasions the two of you go out he gets jealous of anyone with even the slightest interest in you. Your HIS demon why are you giving someone else your attention?

Its pretty easy to distract him though. Just the slightest touch and hes flushing and stuttering. You can do whatever he won't get the hint that you like him the most.

'There's no way you meant to do this. This must be some weird demon norm I don't know about. Yup that's it.'

Satan

Summoned a demon on purpose. And not just that summoned you on purpose.

With his extensive library he had more than enough information to figure out how to summon a demon. After that it was just a matter of choosing which one. He finally settled on you.

You don't need to worry about explaining how a pact works to him. He already knows everything on it. Maybe even more than you. Nerd.

Don't express this opinion out loud. He will be furious.

Even so he'll still make you tell him about summoning a million times just to see if you know anything different.

Mostly you’re an over glorified assistant/labrat to him. MC grab that book. MC draw this summoning circle. MC stick your hand in this flame.

Of any of the brothers he is the one who sees your demon form the most and the one who asks the most questions about it. You have very sharp claws what are those used for? Four sets of wings? I wonder why you have so many. Slitted eyes? Do you have any idea why they are like this?

He is very interested in the differences between humans and demons so you end up performing a lot of tests.

He would also be curious about the celestial war and your part in it. Its up to you to choose to answer him or not.

If you ignore any of his questions he will get annoyed and be snippy. But just tell him an interesting tidbit about hell and he'll be back to normal in no time.

As for his actual job he works as a researcher at a big lab. You go there often to help him with his work. He used to have a lot of assistants but none could handle his terrible rage.

Its one of the reasons you work so well with him. An angry human? That's no big deal. Now if he was a demon that would be something to talk about

His tantrums are actually kind of cute. Like a fussy kitten.

Telling him this has a 50/50 chance of either making him blush or rampage.

If its possible he uses you to annoy his colleagues

Janice talked shit about his theories on planetary alignment? Poison her

Jk not really but maybe just, like, make her day a hundred times worse?

Thanks MC you're great

A power team at its best. His need to get back at people he hates works well with your general need to cause mischief

Asmodeus

An orgy summons you obvious reasons. Although technically not the one who summoned you, you end up making a pact with Asmodeus before the nights over.

It was inevitable really, of all the humans there how could you not choose him? His overblown confidence and cocky insistence that he was perfect was practically adorable. I mean here you are, a demon of all things, and yet this little human is here insisting that he was perfection himself. You just wanted to eat his soul right up he was so cute.

To him its obvious why. After all, he was so beautiful that even demons fell in love with him, he couldn't blame you.

Even if you tell him the real reason he won't believe it.

Immediately starts bragging about how he could seduce demons

If you leave a pact mark on him though he will complain

As for actual duties you don't have a lot

At parties you work as his wingman but at home the two of you have more of a domestic role. He treats you more like a best friend than a demon.

He has a lot of spa days, something he immediately insisted that you take part in too.

One day you bring him a bottle of demon moisturizer. Big mistake

When he finds out about all the different demon beauty products he immediately orders you to get him some.

Your poor wallet.

He's always ordering new things. He really wants to go down to Devildom so he could look himself instead of having to order off Akuzon. One day you'll figure out a way to show him the eternal night.

He's also very flirty towards you, something your not surprised about. Hes always on your lap or petting your head or asking for affection, and he constantly alludes to the things the two of you could do. As time goes on he begins to get even more needy, sometimes ignoring others at parties just to flirt with you. He wants all of your attention all of the time.

Beelzebub

Did not mean to summon you but now that your here hes pretty okay with it

Of all the brothers he the one to treat you the most like another human.

However you have one duty that you take very seriously

You must protect his brother, no matter what.

Other than that you two are like roommates. He doesn't really ask you of much except to keep the fridge stocked (which is a bigger job than expected this guy eats a lot) and he'll take care of the rent and everything else.

Sometimes he'll ask if you want to head to the gym with him. You thank your demon metabolism since every time you end up going he always stops for burgers and shakes at his favorite place on the way home.

He lifts a lot for a human, no surprise since you've seen how sculpted his body is. Seriously he's like a Greek statue. You spot him while doing reps and help correct his form while necessary. It's a bit of a switch from dealing with demon biology to human biology though so you have to make sure that you don't accidentally hurt your new friend.

Sometimes the two of you have movie nights, although its more of an excuse for him to buy a bunch of human food and you to buy a bunch of demon food and pig out. He still manages to out eat you somehow.

Occasionally the two of you will go out with his brother Belphie although it usually ends up with either you or Beel carrying him when he falls asleep. But it gives you time to chat with Beel on your own which you don't mind

The two of you end up with a good bromance, sometimes minus the b.

He treats you like an old friend and even ends up telling you about Lilith, his dear sister who died when a car hit her. He had only managed to pull his brother out of the way at the time and he still remembers it well. You can practically smell the guilt that hangs off him when he tells you that. It's hard not to feel touched after that story even for a demon.

He confesses a lot of things to you, things he has a hard time saying to other people. He never calls upon his pact to swear you to secrecy. He trusts you.

Belphie

Also summons you on purpose

When you first meet Belphie he's angry, uncontrollably angry. It's at the point where it almost surprises you. After all a human filled with so much wrath is no small feat.

His first order is a tough one but one you have no choice but to accept.

Kill the man that murdered his sister

The two of you work hard to hunt him down, spending many days brainstorming late into the night. Although it always ends up with just you working, as Belphie has the strangest tendency to fall asleep while talking. (Narcoleptic maybe? Or just lazy?) Whatever the case you don't terribly mind.

Even just his presence helps, in some strange way.

When you finally track him down Belphie insists on going too. He wants to see the man die with his own two eyes.

It's not a hard fight but it is an emotional one. Through the bond you two share you can feel Belphies anger, his pain, his desire for revenge, and then finally an emptiness.

When its over the two of you go home, still covered in whatever bits of him were left. Belphegor shows no emotions and you wonder if hes in shock from seeing someone die so suddenly, but all you feel is a tired yet content thrum through your bond.

When you finally get home Belphegor immediately tries to go to sleep and its only through a little nagging and a lot of manhandling that your able to convince him to shower first. By now the bloods beginning to dry into a nasty goop and once he's done you jump in too, soothed by the steam and clouds of soap drifting around you.

To no ones surprise Belphie is asleep when you get out. It's then when you realize that you have nothing left to do.

With that one action your purpose here is done, and yet your pact remains. Your thoughts begin to rise Belphie who clings stubbornly to sleep. It's no use though. The two of you are too connected for it to stop.

You hear the sheets rustle and he raises one hand patting at the covers. A universal sign to come here.

"You're so loud" He mutters even though you haven't said a word. "Just sleep already."

A useless answer but a comforting one. You curl up at his side, feeling the tiniest bit like an obedient dog, but his arm settles over your shoulder and he drapes himself over your chest erasing the thoughts from your mind.

You eyes flutter close, at least for the moment. You can decide what you should do when you wake up.

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fanficsandfluff · 4 years ago

Text

The Snyder Cut: Headcanons (mostly of the tickly nature)

Bruce Wayne (Batman) ~ Batfleck, my love

He’s such a lover boy, and I can say that though I don’t exactly know how to explain what I mean. You just gotta understand.

He cares so strongly about EVERYONE. e v e r y o n e. Alfred, fucking loves the guy, jokes with him. The fucking “This is Alfred, I work for him.” MY MAN, STOP!

I think he just really wants to get along with everyone and wants everyone to get along in general.

But he lowkey crushes on Diana (at least in his mind, he’s keeping it lowkey, but we all see what’s happening)

I love the idea of this big hunk of a man getting soft with someone like Diana.

She makes him genuinely laugh this one time by saying something funny, and then they’re both laughing together.

Bruce definitely has one of those laughs where he throws his head back and shit and you can see his like Adam’s apple bobbing and everything.

But that’s if he’s really laughing.

And he has loud “HA”’s that are like really short but loud and then he kinda just snickers to himself for a while, holding his stomach.

And dude, the scene in freaking uhh… i think it’s BvS I’m not 100% (maybe i fucking imagined it who knows) where she like comes over to him and is fixing his wound….. tickle scenario hand picked from the gods right there

I can see a whole, “Woah!” from Bruce when Diana traces her fingers on some sensitive skin. And that Gal Godot smile is on her in an INSTANT.

Bruce will laugh if he’s with the right person. Like I headcanon that if he’s being tickled, he will laugh if it’s done by Diana or Barry, then like he’ll be forced to laugh if it’s Clark bc he overpowers the poor bat, but then he just has these hilarious bouts of angry growls and chuckles if Arthur is going after him.

I can’t even write about Batfleck being a ler because I will literally explode, so I’m done here

(((((butseriouslyifanyonewantstotalklerbatfleckwithmehmuplz)))))

Diana Prince (Wonder Woman)

I know the GIF isn’t from ZSJL but just let me live, ok? (Also I couldn’t find the one of Gal wiggling her fingers YOU KNOW THE ONE I’M TALKING ABOUT)

First off, Gal is the most horrible queen of giggles. I’ve seen those blooper reels. My god, girl, how do you keep getting hired?

SHE HAS SUCH A BIG SMILE IT’S LIKE THE ROCK IDK HOW THEIR TEETH AND MOUTH GET SO WIDE LOOKING

Diana will start tickle fights without a doubt.

She’s already very trustful and I also feel pretty handsy with people, especially those she may feel close to. So if she’s playful, you best watch out.

Her favorite targets are Bruce and Barry. I will not take criticism. Diana attacking Barry and reducing him to panicky shrieky laughs is my #1 thought. It’s not even living rent free, I’m commissioning it to be there.

Diana is one to laugh with her victims. She will wreck them and have a great time doing so.

She’ll be ticklish if she wants to be, but it isn’t often she gets pinned and tickled or anything like that.

The guys try to stay away from her or not go after her with tickles for fear of retaliation.

AQUAMAN, CYBORG, SUPERMAN, AND THE FLASH UNDER THE CUT

Arthur Curry (Aquaman)

So…. my man isn’t really ticklish. I really don’t think he is, I feel like his Atlantean genes make his skin a special kind of hard, if that makes sense?

THAT BEING SAID ARTHUR IS THE BIGGEST LER OMGGG

He’ll try and act all cool and ‘whatever’ around the League cuz that’s kind of his persona.

But he slowly gets to like them more and more and his playful side starts to come out.

He’ll tickle Barry out of pure annoyance. Like if Barry makes any kind of comment, he’ll just point his finger out and get that glint in his eye and Barry is sprinting for the hills.

Here’s my favorite headcanon: Arthur will tickle Bruce because he knows it pisses him off when he does it. Bruce will fight back and keep Arthur in his sights at all time and curse and growl at him. And Arthur thinks it’s hilarious.

Arthur as a ler will taunt and tease until the cows come home

“Huh, big guy? What’s that? Ahawww that’s what I thought!... Not so fast/tough/etc. now!... I will wreck you.”

Victor Stone (Cyborg)

Unfortunately… not ticklish. :(

But this boy has the sweetest laugh you will ever hear, and I will die on that hill.

Now that he has friends (superpowered friends, no less), he can slowly come alive and be himself.

I can see Victor not getting involved in tickle fights at first, but at a certain point he’ll be all like, “Okay, step aside so we can do this right” and just PIN THE SHIT OUT OF WHOEVER IS BEING TICKLED. His extra robot arms are killer!

Okay, when he laughs for the first time in front of the group, there’s that cliche moment of pause where everything stops and everyone just stares and listens to him. It’s so rare to hear him laugh because the poor kid barely even smiled around them in the beginning.

He SMIRKS

Now hear me out on this…

Okay, so half a face. Great. Weird. We love it. But you can see all of mischievous Victor when the guy SMIRKS. You see his eye squint and you can swear his robot eye gets a gleam of a different color.

Wait honestly as I was writing that, the thought of Victor’s eye and like his apparatus changing color based on his mood is golden.

Me sitting here, lowkey wishing Victor’s robot body had some kind of cuddly mode like Baymax lmfaoooo

Like the defense mode his body went into when he was around resurrected Supes, but for cuddles and being cute.

Clark Kent (Superman)

I was debating even including any headcanons for Superman bc I don’t care about him much, honestly.

I am v happy they kept in the whole ‘him staring at Flash through the speed storm’ scene bc I laughed so hard at that the first time i saw Josstice League in the theater.

Also I didn’t really like the black superman costume??? I’m not a comic buff, so I’m assuming that’s why. I am like the one person who missed the color from the Josstice League cut. Don’t miss the stupid red sky in the finale, but I miss every other ounce of color that was just SUCKED right out of the Snyder Cut.

Clark and Bruce are besties now, I don’t make the rules. Bruce bought the man his house back. By buying the bank. He’ll take care of him.

And I’ve always simped for those two ever since BvS, bc I’ve already written like two fics where they tickle each other.

Clark overpowering Bruce to tickle the shit out of him makes me so happy lol. Big strong boy Batfleck looking thiccc over here… but put him against Superman and he’s donezo. Because as mentioned earlier, I do think Bruce is pretty ticklish.

But Clark can have his lee side when he’s feeling nice

He’s got that mighty chuckle, almost like how Thor might laugh.

And he really likes getting involved in tickle fights with the League. He knows all of them are sorta afraid of him on the daily anyway, but have that power added to a tickle fight and it’s fun as hell.

He’s gotten taken down by them ONCE. And I mean exactly (1) O N C E.

They all teamed up. Bing, bang, boom. Pinned him to the floor and they each took an area of skin and fucking SQUEEZED AND WIGGLED. They were trying to incapacitate him as quickly as possible. And dangummit, he laughed a lot! Like Clark realized just how ticklish he could feel if he wanted to feel it.

And don’t even get me started on Lois, he’s big on getting her to giggle and she likes toying with him and running her hands all over his body (bc who wouldn’t?)

Barry Allen (The Flash)

I waited to write about Barry last because I have so much to say about this character....

and then I fell asleep and waited until the next day to write anything down about him so now I’m totally not in the mood and I forgot all the salient points I was planning on making.

fuck you, michelle.

I got a weird relationship with this character. He was mad annoying in the Josstice League. Thank goodness they trimmed his bad jokes down.

But now....

when he got hurt at the end and he was like crying and shit oh my god I wanted to hug him

His character got so... good

And I’m now at the right age where I can think about myself in a relationship with this character with no changes or shame

We both out here trying to find that one good job after college and everything

BARRY JUST WANTS FRIENDS, GUYS

HE’S THAT CUTE

And then he got this whole found family schtick with the Justice League!!! Lookit him!!! Thriving!

He has total little brother energy

like, pesky little brother. Bothers everyone, looks over people’s shoulders while they’re deep in thought or concentrating on something.

Asks a lot of questions.

All the more reason for the gang to want to tickle the shit out of him.

Barry just reads like a super ticklish lee. Like his whole character.

Maybe touch starved because he said he needed friends, and I don’t think he has siblings??? (sorry if i’m wrong about that, comic fans)

I already named some of my fav headcanons about him getting tickled by like Diana and such, and I’m sticking with it.

Barry does flee. He runs away with super speed.... but sometimes he just kinda wants the tickles so he lets them have at him.

The chase is all part of the fun with tickling Barry, though. That’s what makes it so entertaining. And Barry isn’t afraid to be a little shit about it either. He will super-speed around his pursuers and poke their sides and tickle them back really quickly before they even know what’s happening.

Barry doesn’t exactly hold back his laughter lol. He’ll protest and scream and squirm like crazy, but once he’s actually tickled, he loses it.

Pure boy. With funny ass facial expressions.

And it really doesn’t help that I never realized just how hot Ezra Miller is, even though I heard he’s not a great person irl. Oh well.

THAT’S ALL FOLKS!

Please please let me know if y’all have things to add, to squee over, to question me about... please. anything. i’m here for you. thanks for reading, guys!

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pridewhatpride · 3 years ago

Note

omg pls talk more about GX rival shipping once the transfer students come

Dear anon, I love you for asking this of me, but I have to wonder if you want everyone who follows me to start hating me.

Long post coming up? You know it. I apologise to all Johan fans, he's great and I loved him and his deck as a child. Now I'm just salty because he's too perfect. Warning because this is a mess of unrequited feelings and it's an all around bad time if you ship anything in gx. I did mention I do not practice self care in a previous post of mine. Enjoy your pain c:

So here are my bad takes of the day, under the very handy cut!

You see, gx rivalshipping becomes a lot more complicated and angsty when the transfer students arrive. The dynamic changes. If there is a dynamic at all. I mean, imagine yourself in Manjoume's shoes. You've lowkey had a crush on this dumb guy who kind of ruined your life (but actually improved it and freed you from the restraints your family imposed on you), just to watch a handsome scandinavian dude who is a lot more muscular than you are and maybe a little bit nicer, maybe just waltz in and completely captivate said dumb guy's attention. Just when you had managed to admit your own feelings to yourself.

Johan comes in and steals the room, everybody loves him, he's good looking, charismatic, kind and has a magical exclusive shiny sparkling deck at his disposal that he uses as if it was the most natural thing in the world, like he hadn't received approval Pegasus himself on top of the duel spirits. And Judai clearly can't get enough of it, because he's always seeking him out, ever since the duel they had in front of everyone, and Manjoume finds that he's really annoyed by it. He wishes he'd been chosen for the demonstration, deluding himself into believing that if he'd won, Judai would have never started caring so damn much about Johan. But a part of him knows he would have probably lost and that even if he hadn't, Judai would have not cared about the outcome at all. It's nice to think that winning a card game can solve all your problems, but, while Manjoume has only ever experienced how much losing one can mess with your life goals, he isn't stupid enough to think that winning would grant him happiness. Not anymore. No well-thought-out strategy can rid him of his bad temper and his worthless pride.

The thing is, he can't really hate Johan, because nobody can hate Johan. He's just the perfect picture of everything Manjoume isn't and, going by everyone's reaction, the fact that 'everyone is unique in their own way and worthy of love' is absolute bullshit. There clearly is an objective better one of the two and Manjoume is very aware that he isn't it. And he'd probably begrundgingly be cool with it, after all he'd accepted that Jaden was braver than him, that Asuka was emotionally stronger and more resolute, that Daichi was smarter, not to mention how much plain better than him his fomer upperclassmen were. Forget about pros like Edo, whom Judai had stood on equal grounds with. But Judai is clearly playing favourites, too, hell, he hardly even acknowledges Manjoume.

He finds himself forcibly removed from his already shaky position as rival, because now Johan is there to take it up, on top of the titles of 'best friend' and 'emotional support and crutch' and 'maybe something else I'd really rather not know'.

Manjoume just generally hates it all. He might have changed and improved himself, but there is no saving him from the fact that some people were just better. That doesn't stop him from trying. But again he finds himself pitted against Judai, the irony of his fate never giving him a moment to rest. Manipulated and turned into the enemy of those he cares about, again.

A part of him despises how good it feels to learn that Johan has gone missing, but Judai is screaming like his arms have been torn off and while he hates that it's all for Johan, he hates that Judai is in pain even more. Judai had saved him before and it's only right for him to return the favour. So he insists on helping him on his stupidly risky plan to save Johan. And it's all to get the old Judai back.

...The rest, from Manjoume's perspective is a mess. His feelings of anger stem from the hatred he harbours towards himself and the bond between Judai and Johan. He'd been trying to help, he had, he sincerely had, but everything just swirled together and the next thing he knows is that he is shouting at Judai because it suddenly made sense to guilt trip him over the fact that he'd abandoned his friends, he'd abandoned him as soon as someone better had come into the picture. And it was Judai's fault for letting them- him believe that he cared when he didn't, when he couldn't have cared less, because clearly he had one priority only and that was Johan. They had come to help and it still wasn't being appreciated.

Disappearing is a relief, for a moment, but then he finds himself in another hellish place and he can't help but think that it's retribution for being so upset over something that has nothing to do with him. That's right. It's his own fault for making Judai, his only real friend (aside from Fubuki, sorry for breaking the immersion, but I love Fubuki), carry the burden of the stupid hopes that came with his feelings. Judai has no fault. Johan has no fault. It's his own for desiring something that would always be out of reach.

As he is tortured by his own thoughts and regrets in the other dimension, Manjoume silently wishes his words meant nothing to Judai, that he'd be spared the pain of betrayal. He wishes Judai can achieve his goal.

When Shou appears to him, he knows there is no time to waste. If he is alive, the others are, too. Judai would want to know that they are safe. So he asks Shou to carry his message, along with his good luck wish. He hopes it's enough to make up for his mistakes.

Next thing he knows, they are back at DA, Judai is nowhere to be seen. Manjoume mourns the loss of his first and only friend and curses himself for tarnishing that memory. (Judai's return and season 4 would be too much to cover, this was only Manjoume's pov and I might as well just rewrite the entire show at this point.)

So what about Judai?

I personally want to believe that he genuinely does like Manjoume at some point. But as much as it pains me to admit it, season 3 just wrote Manjoume off from the list of main characters and relegated him to 'he's your funny comic relief, nobody really gives a shit about what he thinks or feels, so why should you, the spectator who has grown to love him, care at all? Also here's his sticker that confirms that Judai going after Johan makes him really angry for some reason, make of that what you will c:' (fuck the writing staff, I'm not even sorry).

Judai is so clearly smitten with Johan. It seems to me that his refusal to accept Manjoume's help that one time on the cliff shows that Judai doesn't really understand the way Jun operates. He probably labeled him as just someone else who counted on him to be saved. And sure, Manjoume is saved by Judai in multiple occasions, but he doesn't ever really... ask for it? Or more importantly expect it. He doesn't get himself into situations he can't handle because Judai can save him anyways, the trouble just kind of happens at him and more often than not he's only involved by accident, because he happens to be close to Judai.

The problem still stands, as season 3 starts, Judai is very much burdened by everyone's expectations and Johan is a breath of fresh air and the only one Judai actually considers a friend and an equal. It's heartbreaking that he felt that alone.

They get their gay 'have we met somewhere before moment', they duel gaily, they homoerotically tell eachother how admirable the other is, they shamelessly flirt and whoohoo Judai has an unofficial boyfriend and who can blame him for concentrating on him along with wanting to escape the pressure his former gang unknowingly laid on him.

But yeah, Judai in season 3 has a one track mind and it's hard not to see it as romantic. Does he know it is? Maybe? I honestly don't know. I feel like Johan is the one of the two who is aware of the implications of their interactions. Which also kind of brings me to say... does Johan think that all of Judai's friends are horrible people? Because he never once comments on how Judai distances himself from them once he arrives. He probably thinks they were never good friends in the first place.

Judai probably excuses his attentions towards Johan with the fact that they are alike because they can see spirits, but then he rememebers that so can Manjoume and maybe he feels guilty for a second, but Johan cracks a joke and Judai laughs and thinks to himself that Manjoume is probably happy to have the peace and quiet he so often claimed to want.

Like... I think a part of him would get that tightness in his chest because it's like he's betrayed someone, but he knows he hasn't, because there isn't any actual mutual agreement he's going against. So he lets himself fall deeper into the comfort of Johan's presence. Johan is, to Judai, the ideal person. He is exactly who Judai wants to become. Judai admires him very deeply and strives to be more like him, but he falls gradually into despair as he learns, once Johan is gone, that no, he can't be like him, because Johan is so much better than him, and if he doesn't get him back soon he might even forget what he was like in the first place. Johan can't be erased, can't be forgotten. And Judai feels like he's vanishing already, so he throws himself into a wild interdimensional manhunt to save his hopes for the future.

Turns out that wanting to do good doens't always result in a good outcome. That's what Judai learns when Manjoume lashes out at him just seconds before disappearing. Along with the others, too. Judai doesn't even have the brain power to compute that some people are still there, that he can still save someone, because he realised then that he had focused so much on Johan that he'd completely overlooked the fact that while his friends relied on him a little too much, they hadn't meant any harm. And if he'd just told them, maybe they would have been fine, they could've cooperated- but Manjoume had told him that he was a traitor, that he'd doomed them with his irrational behaviour.

Manjoume's last words to him had been spoken with hatred and Judai realised only then that he had misread him entirely. He lets despair and self hatred take over as he realises that if he had managed to hurt the ones he cared about so easily, discarding them for the new good thing, he could just keep doing that. And it would stop hurting, eventually.

I like to think that Manjoume really does have an impact on the awakening of the Supreme King. Yeah, I know he only turns once Johan's death is mentioned, I know. I just suffer from abandonment issues and can't stand that Manjoume dying in front of him is more impactful to Judai than a guy who literally can't be trusted saying "Joke's on you, the one you're looking for is in another castle already dead."

So yeah. That's the angsty overview.

TL;DR Johan is an Adonis, Judai is smitten and Manjoume is very very heartbroken. But actually so is Judai. Because while being with Johan feels right, there's someone whose absence feels wrong, but he doesn't allow himself to dwell on it and everything goes to shit. All around a bad time for everyone and they'll have a lot of talking to do once they properly reconcile after graduation.

#blame anon not me #i advise you don't read this even if i spent actual hours on this #projection time #ygo #yugioh #ýgo gx #yugioh gx #judai yuki #yuki judai #jaden yuki #manjoume jun #jun manjoume #chazz princeton #gx rivalshipping #mentions of spiritshipping #like it's basically canon in the show no way around it #ulri doesn't like johan and it's time to get cancelled for it #enjoy your pain anon #i'm legit so fucking sorry

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takaraphoenix · 3 years ago

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how about buffy?

Thanks for playing! <3 send me a fandom and i’ll tell you…

the first character i ever fell in love with: probably Willow? I started watching this show during season 4's first airing, when Willow and Tara were just falling for each other so Willow was one of the first lesbians I've ever seen on screen? Plus witch??

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: mh, maybe Angel? I used to be on board with his whole shtick a lot, saw him as a tragic figure, but the older I got the more critical I got of his own decision making that brought him to that point and how he dealt with all of it

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: Angel and Buffy, for the above mentioned reasons too. It was easy to romanticize when you're Buffy's age back then but the older I got

my ultimate favorite character™: Buffy Anne Summers. I love Spike, love him a lot, but Buffy really is just... the best? I love her so much, she is so complex, even as the hero she gets to be flawed and struggle and stumble

prettiest character: well that's harder to answer, there are many pretty characters on this show? I guess Spike

my most hated character: Riley. little bitch

my OTP: Spike/Buffy!! *^*

my NOTP: Riley/Buffy if we're going by canon ships, but non-canon I've seen people ship Willow the lesbian with Spike and Angel, even with both, and just... no...

favorite episode: Once More, With Feeling, for sure. It is uplifting, the music is great, I love it

saddest death: Joyce I mean wow that whole episode. I love how her death is really processed. It's not just... dead, move on, the way other characters die, it really becomes the focus

favorite season: season 7, for sure!

least favorite season: season 4, ironically. But it's just... the villain plot falls apart - I know it's for real world reasons concerning the actress of the supposed main villain, but still. Also Riley. Just. Riley and the military, I hate the military so that also added to it. It's not all bad, obviously - domesticated Spike, my beloved, Tara/Willow, Anya - but it also has many bad things standing against those

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: uuuhm not hate, but I dislike Dawn. I was genuinely surprised by how much Dawn defense is happening on tumblr? She is just... so flat. A bunch of teen girl cliches hiding in a trenchcoat, she barely got more characterization beyond the cliches. The sister of a Slayer had potential but it was wasted by mostly just letting her do Cliche Teen AngstTM? The whiny diary entries so far removed from actual reality, stealing for attention oh wow so original, crushing on her big sister's only guy friend, it's like... paint by numbers, nothing about her was written in a unique way that gave her a unique personality. I wish the writers had done more with her, given her more depth; seeing her have established friends, dynamics beyond the Scoobies, her own thing, and having actual serious conversations. Season 7 was when they actually started to try and give her more, have her meet people in high school now, but that's already the end of the show...

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: Spike? :D *thinking about him literally digging through trash <3*

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: Tara Maclay, for sure ;^;

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: I don't have any ship I'd even categorize as "nasty" in this fandom, fact aside that I wouldn't classify any ship I actually ship as "makes me want to cleanse my soul"???

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: honestly I can't think of anything here, perhaps Giles/Joyce?

#Buffy the Vampire Slayer #Fandom Ask Game #send me asks

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thethreemages · 4 years ago

Text

W O O, so I'm back a bit from the art-grave to finally upload this piece I had completed a lil while ago... the pic in question being some slight redesign/touchups for two of my central side characters of TTM, Noira and Raider Crane~ 💙 Just to keep things a lil fresh and reflecting a bit better of their current character portrayals, so I hope you all enjoy! ^^

More info about both characters can be found below (and here on DA too)~

-Noira Crane (age 16) is Raider's younger sister, Princess Zia's best friend and currently enrolled at St. Ravilda's Mage Academy. A generally stoic and poised young lady with a rather sharp tongue than many would expect... often expressed through well-placed snark at those trying to interrupt her and Zia's "fun" (aka: sneaking around and setting up pranks around the school). When she's not busy hanging with Zia and keeping up their rather limited cheer squad these days, Noira could often be seen competing heavily for maintaining her place up above the top ranked students (of which a certain white-haired prince keeps trying to secure that spot for himself). Underneath her "well-to-do" exterior, however... lies a deep-down insecure girl who often feels pressured to bottle up her feelings, especially with the amount of pressure her parents (Lachlan & Vinia) put on both her and her brother Raider growing up. Combined with the strain put on from Raider's falling out with their parents a few years back... it's left Noira rather scared to delve too much into her own natural Water Mage abilities for fear she can't measure up (even with her folks trying their best to "dial back" for her sake, since she's their only remaining child living with them now). The few things in life that can truly bring a sense of peace and smiles to her face are Zia's company, the success of beating her rivals, and the never-ending bond she and Raider share between eachother... no matter the distance, no matter what. (Fun Facts about Noira): -She's usually never seen walking around without her beloved dog companion, "Misty Belle" (courtesy to my pal @littlechaoticwitch for helping to come up with the name :3 ). The fluffy pup given to her as a gift from her folks a few years back, Misty is quite a sweet lil lady for most who are allowed to be near her. Always eager to follow her mistress around faithfully, snuggling and goofing around the room when left idle, and occasionally chewing at the ankles of those who try to mess with Noira (like, again, a certain white-paired prince who never ceases to push his luck lol). -She was named after one of the earlier Crane family ancestors, "Noira the Victress". Said to have been quite a powerful blood pirate, the present-day Noira Crane has... always been a bit unsure of how to feel about her namesake, despite her father and some other distant relatives seeming rather proud of it. She's still a lil curious to try and research more about her ancestor though, given how popular she was as a subject for numerous campfire stories. -Noira has been diagnosed as nearsighted from the time she was in elementary school, and thus is never seen without her favorite pair of horn-rimmed glasses (an aesthetic picked up from her favorite aunt, Freya). -While her parents have officially stated for Noira to be the heir to their Crane Corp Industries business, Noira is still conflicted in herself of what she wants to do in life by the time she graduates. Whether it'd be to try out being a traveling Mage, or join more of Zia's royal court down in Asteria... its hard for her to decide atm. -Being born a rather tiny and frail baby, Noira was always watched like a hawk by the family-hired medical professionals to keep her safe and protected. She's required to carry a couple EpiPens with her on the day-to-day with how many allergies she has, and Zia always tries to remember to keep a nice lil bag of snacks with her too in case her friend's blood sugar dips too low (as does Raider when he and Noira get to hang out on their own). ============= -Raider Crane (age 21) is Noira's older brother, one of Kain's old school friends and currently making it big as an extreme stunt performer/traveling Electric mage. A bright, cheerful and fun-loving young man who lives to make others smile... whether it'd be for his own friend group or the crowds of audiences who clamor to come see his shows. Yet even with so much going well for him now... it wasn't always the easiest for him growing up before. Living under the roof of his folks who

always kept a tight grip

on him being "the best" (especially by his father), and even facing it worse with some bullying by Kaz's crew at school... it left Raider pretty timid and reclusive for the longest time. Only once others like Kain, Lyra, Briar and a few others taking the time to approach him did his true loveable goofball nature started to sprout for good... but at the same time, something just felt "missing" within Raider that didn't really sit right with him. Knowing how much of a rut he'd be bound to stay in if he kept up things how they were now... he decided by his last few years of Ravilda's to "change" himself for the better. From getting a new "bolder" punk look, working out and bulking over the summer, and taking some social sessions with fellow popular girl Dyani to gain some confidence in himself... Raider returned to the halls of the academy with a brighter, more-outgoing outlook on life now. He started gaining popularity left and right, taught Kaz's crew a thing or two when they tried one last chance to mess with him, and by graduation he was already on his way to make it big after getting signed on by an aspiring tv crew. All was going fine for once... yet back at home, things escalated between his parents (who still didn't seem understanding of Raider's personal dreams over their family business) to where Raider just... couldn't take it anymore. Many words were exchanged that night that prompted the young man to up and leave the family home for good... and never turning back except to now and then check up on his baby sister Noira. As the few years passed up until now, things are still going good for Raider in terms of his work and bond with Noira... though things remain relatively strained and awkward in regards to him and his parents. Whether things will ever truly improve or not with them is unclear as of now... but for the time being, Raider is at least content with himself on being able to finally shape his life the way it should be; fun, free, and fulfilling in its own way~. (Fun Facts about Raider): -Back at his own personal trailer, Raider has a trio of cats he adopted awhile back named "Sprocket", "Buzz", and "Zipps". Having always been a strong cat person since he was a boy (but never getting the chance to own one growing up, given his mom's allergy to them), it was a big dream of Raider's to get his own feline companion by the time he moved out of the house. He went to the shelter to find three kitten siblings who were tossed aside and overlooked among some other animals... and being the big sweetie as he was, Raider was all too eager to scoop them up to adopt them all together. They're quite a funny bunch who tend to get into some trouble if left unsupervised, but are very much loyal to Raider either way with how often they'll form some "snuggle piles" with him once he's off-of-work. -Raider gained his name from his paternal great-grandfather, Raider "The Swiftest" Crane. Originally was going to be named "Odin" (after Lachlan's own father, as was the old man's request many years ago)... but due to a falling out between the two not long before his son's birth, Lachlan decided against that and gave his boy "an even prouder name" to look up to instead. As for the present-day Raider himself, he's always been curious to know more about his great-grandfather given some accounts about him being a "commander of the skies" (via-riding dragons). -From birth, Raider has carried an eye condition known as "Anisocoria"... in which one of his pupils is permanently smaller than the other eye and thus leaving him with some partially-blurred vision. For certain shows of his that take place in some heavy-weather conditions, Raider is required to wear some specialized goggles to help him see through his performance. -His current neon/cyan blue hair isn't his natural haircolor, as Raider was actually born with darker/blackish-blue hair instead. Used to grow it out pretty shaggy and long up until his teens (in where he often hid his face behind his locks at times when he was down on himself)... but by the time his last

few highschool years rolled around, he cut most of it off and styled it to the look its at now as a nice change of pace. Got quite a few compliments on it's initial debut, so Raider has long since kept it around as his own lil "brand". -As most of his friends have all long since went their separate ways after Ravilda's, Raider is the main one who likes to keep arranging for them to meet up on the few downtimes they're able to take off from their schedules. Often likes to greet any of his buddies with the biggest, crushing hugs imaginable (being lowkey touch-starved as he is)... and while not always the most logical thinker in terms of planning, he's the main heart to keep the group afloat in times they start bickering or feeling lost with one another.

#the three mages #the crane family #my art #raider crane #noira crane #my ocs #oc art #side mages #side characters

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palizinhas · 4 years ago

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For the asks, I'll ask Phineas and Ferb! And if you've already done that, Phineas for the character asks! :)

You know what, I’ll do both!

This is enourmous though, so under the cut.

PnF:

Favorite character: Ferb!! I just think he’s so chill and fun to watch. So many of my favorite moments in the series come from him, because he may not say much, but he says everything he needs to say and more than makes up by his lack of lines by crushing every single one he does have. Also helps that whenever he sung the song was an absolute highlight for me.

Least Favorite character: God. Linda. It’s just. IDK. She’s so unable to take Candace seriously, and if she really thinks that “there’s something wrong with her”, she should do something about it. I know, I know, it’s just for the jokes, but that has always bothered me.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): My only real pnf ships are Phinabella and kinda Perryshmirtz (it’s just this thing where there’s so much cute art for them that I’ve just come to accept it as not being that weird, though I don’t blame people for being grossed out by it). I’m also lowkey fond of Candace/Vanessa and Buford/Baljeet, but I’m not sure I’d say that I really ship them. To round it up with number 5... I’ll cheat and say PnF SW Phinabella, just because PnF really got me to buy into the Skysolo expy huh.

Character I find most attractive: Growing up it was definitely Vanessa, but they’re all my children now.

Character I would marry: Lawrence seems like a chill husband.

Character I would be best friends with: Baljeet’s subplot in CATU being how much he likes Space Adventure was super hashtag relatable as someone who is super into SW. We could nerd out together, it would be fun.

a random thought: I wish they’d make a sequel to PnF SW. I’ve joked about it being named “Emperry Strikes Back” in the past, but it’s just... I love SW. I love PnF. PnF SW is a masterpiece. Let me have more of it.

An unpopular opinion: I’m not even sure what counts or not as unpopular, I’m not that involved with the PnF fandom like I was three years ago, but I think I enjoy CATU more than ATSD. Not because I think it has a stronger story - ATSD just has a lot of plotlines everyone always wanted to see, so no PnF movie will ever touch it in that sense - but I just think CATU is more fun. It definitely has a better soundtrack, but even outside of that I find myself thinking about CATU more than I ever did ATSD outside of writing fic where they remember everything.

My Canon OTP: Phinabella, of course. It will always be so weird to call them “canon”, but they are. AYA’s quality or lack thereof aside, I’ll always be glad for the episode for being the first PnF episode I watched in years and getting me back into the show, and I don’t think that would have happened were it not for my 13-year-old self struggling to read in English because there were no good PnF fanfics in Portuguese.

My Non-canon OTP: I already talked a bit about Perryshmirtz, so I’ll talk about Candace/Vanessa instead. I just think it’s so cool how their relationship evolved over the course of the show. A great thing about PnF is that despite having a very strict formula, there are some relationships that changed over the course of the summer, and these two legit had never even met before the show began and turned out to have such great chemistry.

Most Badass Character: You can’t not say Isabella. There’s Perry too, of course, but I think Isabella impresses me more because she’s not some badass secret agent, she’s just... a kid.

Most Epic Villain: Darth Ferb!!! I went into PnF SW mostly unspoiled and that was so cool.

Pairing I am not a fan of: Um. I have nothing against Canderemy, per se, but I always preferred Candace when she had plots with her brothers or Vanessa than her plots with Jeremy.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Sometimes I think about the Mission Marvel episode and randomly get mad. It’s not even one specific character, I just don’t think that crossover worked. It’s probably the only episode of the show I only watched once, and I just... really don’t like how some of the characters were written in it.

Favourite Friendship: The kid crew is the best, man. All five of them are such fun characters, and I love all of their interactions. My favorite pair within it is probably Buford and Isabella, who I just think had some really fun scenes together, but you can’t go wrong with these five.

Character I most identify with: Growing up it was definitely Baljeet, as the nerd kid who got picked on and all that. Now, I’m not sure?

Character I wish I could be: Honestly, any of the fireside girls. They seem like they’ve got their life together. Wish I could relate.

Phineas:

How I feel about this character: Phineas is such a good kid. I always preferred Ferb, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think Phineas is awesome. He’s so nice, such a genuinely great person who just wants to help everyone so they can have as great a time as he is having.

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Just Isabella, really. I think there’s probably some good fanfic that makes a case for Phineas and other people (Baljeet could be cute, I guess?) but I just can’t really see Phineas with anyone else.

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Ferb!! They just get each other so freaking well, and for all that the actual story of PnF is less about the two of them and more how the other characters react to them, I don’t think the show would have worked if their relationship wasn’t as good.

My unpopular opinion about this character: Again, not sure what counts or not as unpopular. Maybe that I wasn’t into the “Phineas gets angry at Candace” scenes? Like, I remember before CATU came out people would always talk about wanting another, but I was so glad when the movie came out and we didn’t get one. Get on the trike was funny, but after that it got annoying.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I found the Phineas and Ferb Effect (the actual thing, not the episode) a weird choice, but if they were going to go there, I’d have enjoyed some actual aknowledgment on how weird it was. I know a lot of things got cut from the crossover for time, so I get it, but I do wish there was more of a reaction from Phineas and Ferb to finding out about it.

Favorite friendship for this character: I do really enjoy Phineas and Isabella’s friendship? Like, while I do ship them, I was never really one to wish they’d get together within the show because I didn’t want their dynamic to change, because it was just so good on its own. They’re such good friends regardless of anything else and I really appreciate that.

My crossover ship: I don’t do crossover shipping most of the time, tbh.

#phineas and ferb #authenticcadence18

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stardust-make-a-wish · 4 years ago

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Do you have any fic recs for haikyuu and fruits basket? c:

ANON I GOT SO EXCITED WHEN I SAW THIS ASK I LOVE TALKING AB FICS BUT IM GONNA NEED U TO BE MORE SPECIFIC RE: HAIKYUU PLS there r so many pairings its hard to rec stuff unless i know what ur looking for.........i guess ill just rec a bunch of diff ones then !!! (disclaimer i am Bad at summaries- rambling ahead bc i cant control myself hxjsh)

i actually dont read too much fruba fic but these two r v good i love

must be love on the brain (that's got me feelin' this way)

💌　kyoru - 4.3k words | “Tohru has a secret admirer. Everyone reacts to it accordingly. Except Kyo.”

it has.......a rooftop scene......its got that good kyoru pining.....its so good ... (honestly this authors kyoru is just *chefs kiss* just go through their frba tag)

my heart on your sleeve

🧣　kyoru - 3.7k words | “In which stealing your boyfriend’s clothing is an art, and Tohru Honda has perfected it.”

,,,, post curse fluff.....established relationship kyoru ufhdhfgcg i die this is so cute and just....rlly good vibes

alrigjt OK so i have.........a lot of hq fic recs........ if u want like all of them here r my hq bookmarks u can sort through them theyre all gems but ill list like a few of my favs !! this is just going to b ship stuff bc i dont read too much gen <//3

• (mostly)canon compliant:

your wide eyes are the only light i know

🌱 bokuaka - 9.2k

kind of like...how their relationship develops over time., its a bunch of really soft moments i love it.. i cant do it justice in this description but its so so lovely...(this author writes the SOFTEST bokuakas i am in sha mble s... pls check out their fics)

From Tokyo and Osaka, With Love

🌻 bokuaka - 8.2k | akaashi and his birthdays from 17-21, or five years' worth of birthdays spent with bokuto

i,, adore ts bkak and this fic is SO HFJFJD i love it a lot ughhgdb its one of my fave timeskip fics !!def a comfort fic of mine <3 (this author also has a bunch of good stuff on their page !!)

you never have to wander, wonder

🍨 sunaosa - 23k | Between food sharing, intimate conversations, special smiles, and thousand-word pictures, this is how Suna tries to not deal with a crush.

honestly i am not even the biggest sunaosa stan but this fic is just so much fun !! i actually.. reread this one a lot FHDJ i have a few fics that i just tend to read when im sad & this is one of them ! its got summer vibes, v v good friendship dynamics + miya twin shenanigans,, even if ur neutral ab the pairing, this is just such an enjoyable read! (its also got fun socmed aspects.... internet famous miyas is always fun) (this authors fics also slap ahshdb honestly just check out the fics of anyone linked here)

all that you were

🍃 sakuatsu - 4.6k | Sakusa confesses to Atsumu with all the enthusiasm of someone reporting a traffic jam.

this!!! is the fic that got me into skts so itd b a disservice if i didnt rec it !! (yes...check out this author too.......their fics r always so good)

liminal spaces

🚪 sakuatsu - 26k | Fuck you, Atsumu thinks, pointing at the pixelated Sakusa in the team photo on his bedside table. It’s easier than you’d think to ignore loving your teammate.

this fic made me feel things and also its just v vibey. i dont rmbr too much but its like....rlly good hdhd

• aus/canon divergent:

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gb-fics · 5 years ago

Text

Protective Shield

Fanfiction:

Kiryuuin Shou x Kyan Yutaka (Golden Bomber)

Note: This story is loosely based on the song “Boku no sekai wo mamotte” (ぼくの世界を守って) from Golden Bomber’s new album! There will be fics for all the songs I didn’t write about yet eventually, at least that’s the plan (^-^) I’m sorry for the large blocks of text in this one, I hope it’s readable. Oh right, and Happy New Year, everyone!

Shou did not stagger out of the bathroom. He did not, however, walk exactly elegantly either. Shou wasn’t drunk. He had managed to change into pyjamas and brush his teeth and he had only hit his big toe against the bathtub in the process once. Shou wasn’t drunk. He wasn’t, however, completely sober either.

He switched off the bathroom lights and stepped into the hotel room.

“Going out for drinks was a mistake”, he announced loudly and walked over to his bed.

His bed was occupied.

Shou stared down onto the invader, who had made himself comfortable under his blanket.

“It’s fine”, Yutaka mumbled back sleepily. “We have a day off tomorrow before the next concert.”

“This is my bed”, Shou said.

He wished he’d be sharing a room with Kenji or Jun instead. They were currently drunk, too, but they never ended up in the wrong bed. Yutaka had ended up in the entirely wrong room before. He was that kind of person.

“It was a choice forced upon me by the circumstances”, Yutaka said and rolled onto his back.

He looked surprisingly awake.

“Get out of my bed”, Shou said.

He had the feeling that he wasn’t engaging in the most intelligent conversation right now, but he just really wanted to sleep. Or rather, he wanted to lie down. His head was spinning.

“Take mine”, Yutaka offered. “I’m too lazy to move.”

Shou sighed and turned around.

“There is a suitcase on my bed. Just take it down”, Yutaka called after him.

Shou stared at Yutaka’s bed. He now understood what circumstances he had been referring to. There was a suitcase on Yutaka’s bed. The suitcase wasn’t the problem, though. The problem was, that its insides were spilled out all over the mattress. He spotted shirts, socks, manga, a hair dryer, a pack of condoms (a pack condoms, for fuck’s sake?), one orange, two chocolate bars, a dog toy and the remote of Yutaka’s tv at home. He gave up.

Shou turned around, pulled back the blanket and lay down next to Yutaka.

“I have a lot of questions about your packing habits, but I will ask them tomorrow”, he stated.

“Me too”, Yutaka sighed. “I only packed left socks for some reason. Wonder how sober me will explain that in the morning.”

Shou chuckled.

The light overhead was still switched on. One of them would have to get up to turn it off. Shou had the bad feeling that it would be him.

“How do you even survive?”, Shou asked and shook his head.

Although he was lying down now, he still regretted the motion. The world seemed less firm than usual. It just didn’t stay in one place for too long.

“I’ll forward the question to sober me as well”, Yutaka promised.

Shou laughed again.

He could feel Yutaka’s bare arm against his own. He remembered now why he hadn’t been pleased to find Yutaka in his bed to begin with. He felt weird in his presence whenever he drank. Sometimes also when he didn’t drink. But more so after the intake of alcohol.

Truth was, Shou felt sexually aroused finding Yutaka that close to himself. It wasn’t the strong sexual arousal, where he got a solid hard-on. It wasn’t like watching porn. It was like seeing a pack of tissues. His body was conditioned to get lowkey excited. It didn’t mean he was sexually attracted to tissues, though. It didn’t mean he was attracted to Yutaka.

Shou rolled to his side, so he was looking at Yutaka.

Sometimes, Shou wondered if maybe he was attracted to Yutaka, though.

He watched his profile. He loved the curve of Yutaka’s eyebrows and that deep line beneath his eyes, that showed when he smiled. He loved the soft looking shape of his nose and his almost-even-but-not-quite front teeth. He loved the idea of kissing him, too.

“Hey, Shou”, Yutaka said and rolled to his side as well. They were facing each other now.

“Hm?”

Shou wasn’t sure on the matter of his sexuality. He liked women. He liked women a lot. Unfortunately, women did not like Shou back all that much. And sometimes, when he got tipsy, he liked men, too. But he wasn’t sure if that meant he was bisexual or just really, really desperate.

He thought of kissing Yutaka now. But Yutaka was so close and his body felt so warm and alive and human and Shou hadn’t kissed any women in a long time. It probably meant nothing aside from the fact that he was lonely. Because if he really was bisexual, he would think about it, when he was sober, too. But usually he didn’t. There was the possibility, that alcohol connected him with his true inner self. Shou found it easier to admit to his feelings and to tell people they were important to him, when he was drunk. He never regretted those words the next morning. He just wished speaking up was always that easy. But then his judgement wasn’t always quite clear, when he was drunk. He hit his toes on the bathtub for example. He wasn’t sure if Yutaka was a feeling of love he couldn’t admit to, or a hurting toe, because he had misjudged the distance between them.

There was however, the thing about the crushes. It was something Shou had been aware of from his early teenage years on onwards. He had never been with a man like he had been with a woman. He had always crushed on men as easily as he did on women, though. The fluttering in his chest when they messaged him was the same, the amount of time he spent on choosing the right outfit before meeting them was the same. But he had always assumed it was because he developed crushes fast in general. He had a soft spot for kindness. Someone did something nice for him, someone made him a compliment, someone messaged him first three times in a row – and Shou was infatuated. He hated that character trait in himself, because he had always viewed it as weakness. Usually, he didn’t allow himself to give in to it. He ignored the people on purpose, started to keep his distance, because he knew that those gestures meant more to him than they meant to them. He couldn’t bear getting hurt, but he couldn’t stop the fluttering in his chest, either. He had learned to ignore it, when he couldn’t prevent it.

The crushes he got on men didn’t come with the same sexual desire as the crushes on women did, though. They stayed on a more theoretical level. He thought of kissing them sometimes, he thought of receiving oral sex sometimes, but never of giving. But then again, he hadn’t thought so much about those things with women, either, when he was younger. Not before they had actually happened to him, or at least before he had watched a certain amount of porn on the matter. And the porn Shou watched was usually straight porn. He had tried his hands on gay porn before – quite literally so. It had excited him the same way that straight porn did. But he had figured that it didn’t mean much, because it was bodies and penises and holes and pounding and moaning, and the difference really wasn’t that big, so there was no shame in getting excited.

He wasn’t being quite honest, though, if he claimed not to think about sex with men. Because he did think about it. But it was normal to think about that kind of stuff. Shou thought a lot about sex in general. It was only natural that curiosity slipped in bits and pieces here and there. He had to admit, that if someone had confronted him directly, he would have to confess that he thought about sex with men – the full program, penises, butts, the taste of cum in his mouth – several times a week. And he also had to admit, that had someone else made that confession to him, he would have deemed it pretty fucking gay. But compared to the time he spent fantasizing about sex with women, it really wasn’t that much of an issue. 1 to 4, he’d say.

Shou had figured, that the only way of coming clean with his sexuality, was to try being with a man. Sexually, romantically. But mostly sexually. If it was mere curiosity, he would realize that it wasn’t for him and he would return to thinking about women 100% of the time. Or he would realize that he enjoyed being with a man just as much as being with a woman and the percentage would shift to 50/50.

Those considerations only blew up in his mind, when he was drunk, though. When he was sober, he thought that 1 to 4 wasn’t really that dramatic, and that it was more like 1 to 6 anyway. Also, being heterosexual was just more convenient. Even if the people around you accepted it in the end, you would still have to tell them. Dating a man would be so complicated. His family maybe wouldn’t burn his birth certificate in front of his eyes, but they would give him the look. And wasn’t it a little late to change his mind anyway? He was 35 years old already. People would think he was joking. Or having a midlife-crisis. Shou had grown so used to being straight, he’d like to stay that way.

Aside from maybe being bisexual, there was also the possibility, that he was in love with Kyan Yutaka. Shou preferred to not pay it any further thought.

“Jo, Shou”, Yutaka said.

“Hm?”, Shou repeated.

“You were spacing out completely.”

Shou made a face.

“It’s the alcohol”, he explained. “Too many thoughts.”

Yutaka’s face was close. He was drunk, too, but less drunk than Shou. Shou could not imagine there was anyone in the world more drunk than himself currently.

His feelings towards Yutaka were complicated. Because he loved Yutaka – he was sure about that, even if he wasn’t always sure about the way in which he did. But he also hated him. Because he was handsome in a way that Shou would never be handsome. He was carefree in a way that Shou would never be carefree. He was good with people, where Shou stuttered through social interactions. He seemed to be better at living than Shou was, just in general.

He remembered the first time he had realized it. It was the first time he had visited Yutaka at his own place after they had both moved out from home. Yutaka had prepared dinner for both of them. He had chopped vegetables. And that was all it had taken. Yutaka would continue to cook on his free days. And he would get married and maybe have kids. And he would help in the kitchen at least on the weekends and he would play baseball in the garden and he would treat the band like it was a regular job, where it was Shou’s entire life. Because Shou would never be able to build anything else for himself. He was busy dragging a heavy weight along with himself, that didn’t seem to last on Yutaka’s shoulders. And carrying that weight would use up all his energy and writing songs and staying alive was really all he could aim for. And it was the first time, too, that he decided to put his feelings towards Yutaka into words, the first time he had realized what was keeping him apart from people like Yutaka. All that frustration and anger and jealousy, that longing for a life he would never achieve. And love. Love towards Yutaka as well, because he had chosen to be in that kitchen with Shou. He knew about that weight and had chosen Shou, where Shou wouldn’t even choose himself.

“You always have too many thoughts”, Yutaka said softly. “What are you thinking about now?”

“Men”, Shou said.

Yutaka snorted.

Their bodies were not touching at all. The blanket was a little too small for them, lying that far apart. Shou’s back felt cold.

“Sometimes, when I drink, I think I’m bi”, Yutaka said.

Shou rolled his eyes and laughed quietly.

“I know”, he said.

He did know. Because Yutaka had told him about every man he had ever kissed. The list wasn’t exactly long, but at least it was a list. Yutaka was curious by nature and other than Shou, he was bold enough to follow through with that curiosity. It hadn’t come as a surprise to Shou when Yutaka first told him he had kissed a guy “just to try”. He wasn’t in a position to judge, either. Of course, he had been jealous. Jealous that Yutaka had tried with someone else, someone who wasn’t Shou. But he hadn’t been able to actually blame him for it. Yutaka was good looking and incredible charming. He could kiss men more attractive than Shou. And a part of him knew, that it was his own fault, too. That he was tense and his awkwardness kept people at bay – even Yutaka, whom he felt closer to than pretty much anyone else. Shou was the one who needed space. Even if Yutaka had wanted to kiss him, he’d wait for Shou to do it first. Shou had never gathered the courage for it, though.

He was jealous, too, that it was another thing that came to Yutaka so easily. Whenever he questioned his sexuality, he went out and tried. He wasn’t sent spinning into an identity crisis like Shou. The weight on his shoulders was so heavy, it sometimes seemed too easy to lose the person beneath it.

“I also think I’m bi, whenever I drink.”

Yutaka nodded. His cheeks were red and flushed. It always happened to him when he drank, even if otherwise he didn’t get tipsy at all. The colour of his face betrayed him.

“I know”, Yutaka said.

He did know. Because even if he did not talk about it openly, Shou was bad at hiding the crushes he developed. His face lit up, whenever his mobile buzzed.

“But like – you can imagine having sex with a dude?”, Yutaka assured.

Shou knew very well that this was where Yutaka’s confidence started to crumble. He liked looking at men and he liked kissing them and he had some horrific detailed fantasies about threesomes – which he didn’t mind sharing with his bandmembers. But being one on one with a man was a line he did not intend to cross.

“Absolutely”, Shou said.

He hadn’t meant to sound that confident, but ¼ of his sexual daydreams were backing him up.

For a moment, Yutaka looked astonished. Shou cursed the alcohol making him sound that confident. Flirting with the idea when drunk was one thing. Openly admitting to thinking about gay sex was another. Even Yutaka would judge him now.

But then his expression relaxed and Yutaka was grinning widely.

“Well, everybody seems to be bisexual nowadays, don’t they?”, he said lightly.

Shou thought of the Romans and the Greeks and the Samurai. Hadn’t it been the normal state of things in many cultures before? He wasn’t much of a history geek, but to him, it seemed to make sense that humans wanted to be with humans. Skin and sweat and acceptance and love and sex and anything that wasn’t loneliness. Gender didn’t matter much in the end. He imagined Yutaka in a toga.

It was society, that made them believe in heterosexuality, he assumed. The books and the movies and the commercials and not wanting to explain that certain kind of porn magazines to your parents. Sometimes Shou thought that being gay was easier. Society told you: Here, look, women, you are supposed to like them. But if you didn’t like them, you noticed there was something wrong early on. The problem was, that Shou really, really liked women. He had never questioned the system, because he fit into it well enough. Just lately, there was a change. The internet made it possible to take a look outside of Japan. Acceptance was rising. It wasn’t rising everywhere, but if you looked at the right places, you saw it anyway. Shou had become more aware of the system itself. He had started to question it. It was a really exhausting process and sometimes he wished, he could just go back. He was tired of not knowing who he was anymore.

“I guess”, he said.

Yutaka gave him a small smile. His smile spread more slowly when he was drunk.

Shou smiled back.

He forgot how easy it was to talk to Yutaka. How he was never judging Shou for anything; not for his sexuality, not for always thinking too much and not for often feeling so down and heavy, he could hardly take another step. Yutaka was like a safe space, a small corner of the world, in which Shou didn’t have to be scared for a change. That was, why he wrote songs about him, too. Because Yutaka never judged him for it. Shou had written songs about women before, too. He had watched them at his own apartment, studied them, their motions, thought about his feelings for them. Shou was big on thinking. But whenever they caught him staring for too long, they scolded him and, in the end, they always left. Yutaka, though, never minded. He didn’t scold him when Shou watched him chop vegetables and went quiet, because he was making up songs about feeling insufficient for life and feeling jealous and wanting to be a person he could not be. He didn’t mind when Shou watched him apply makeup, back when they could not always afford stylists. Yutaka had a funny habit of leaving his mouth open while putting on concealer, and it made Shou think of how he wanted to be prettier himself, and how he liked Yutaka better without makeup, because he didn’t have to share that version of him with the fans. Yutaka allowed him to space out in bed next to him right now, because he knew about all the worries chasing each other through Shou’s mind constantly. Sometimes, Shou thought that he was only able to make up songs about Yutaka, because he was the only person, in whose presence Shou knew who he was. Everyone else never gave him the time to think about his feelings, when he watched them. They expected him to interact with them like a normal, social human being. But when he was with Yutaka, Shou felt calm enough to put his emotions into words for himself. Those words ended up in songs, and writing songs was the only thing that kept Shou sane. Yutaka was his protective shield. Without him, he’d given up trying to cope long ago.

“You are beautiful”, he mumbled, a wave of affection washing over him.

He reached out, putting his hand against Yutaka’s cheek kind of clumsily. Even his jealousy towards Yutaka was complicated. Shou envied him for his charming good looks, but he didn’t begrudge him. Usually, he didn’t feel the need to be prettier himself. The other person being uglier than him would do. That was what jealousy normally meant to him. But with Yutaka, he’d be fine, just being the second prettiest person in the room. He didn’t want to be better than Yutaka. He just wanted to be good enough for him.

Yutaka kept smiling, watching Shou with clear, dark eyes. Shou realized that Yutaka was nowhere as drunk as himself. Shou had drunken too much tonight, because he had felt sad. He often felt sad, but tonight he hadn’t been able to bear it.

He kept his hand against Yutaka’s cheek.

“Well, thank you. You are always so much nicer when you drink”, Yutaka teased.

He was speaking more quietly than usual. Due to the alcohol, probably. His energy level seemed low as well. He was using his sleepy voice.

“It’s true”, Shou insisted.

Sometimes, he wondered if maybe Yutaka was the love of his life. Because no matter whom else he wrote songs about, he always came back to Yutaka. He had fallen in love with women. He had been heart-broken by women. But in the end, he had always gotten over it. He had never gotten over Yutaka, though. Whenever he looked at his eyes up close like this; whenever they had an honest (if drunk) conversation like tonight, he felt infatuated again. And he wanted to write songs about him again. About the nervousness of being this close to him. About his annoying habits when they shared a room. About how he wanted to tell him about all of his own insecurities, although he had sworn not to bother anyone with them. And Shou thought of how they said this about first love. That you never really got over it. That it was the one person you could not forget. Maybe the girls before he met Yutaka didn’t really matter, because he had indeed gotten over them. But if this was love, he had never loved anyone else, not really at least. Because what he felt for Yutaka was different from anything, he had ever considered romance.

Yutaka’s cheek was hot against his palm. Shou knew that he should definitely let go by now. Yutaka didn’t seem to mind that Shou had long since missed the point of making the touch feel casual.

Shou wanted to kiss him.

He wanted to do it, because he wanted to know what kissing men in general would feel like. And if he tried, he wanted to try with Yutaka. Because he loved Yutaka and he didn’t have to be afraid of being judged by him. And because he was beautiful.

But he didn’t dare.

Because Shou was naturally awkward, and because he was more drunk than Yutaka and was scared of molesting him and also because Yutaka was his best friend and his bandmember and also because he felt like Yutaka was out of his league. If Yutaka wanted to kiss someone looking like Shou, he would have done so before. But he had kissed handsome strangers instead. That was really all Shou needed to know.

He hoped Yutaka understood, that the hand against his cheek meant all that.

Shou knew that he was allowed to kiss Yutaka. Because Yutaka had kissed men before and had no problem knowing that Shou wanted to kiss men, too. Even if he did not want to kiss Shou specifically, he would be gentle about it. He would let it happen, then he would pull back and whisper “you are drunk” or something similar that would count as an excuse and that would not make it feel weird in the morning. Because Yutaka loved Shou. It was strange to acknowledge that, because Shou was not good at accepting love in general. There were a few people in his life, though, of which he believed that they loved him. They all loved aspects of him, though. They loved him due to the circumstances. His family loved him. But they loved him as a son, as a brother. They loved him as something that had happened to them. Jun and Kenji surely loved him, too. But they loved him as a bandleader, as a friend who had opened up possibilities to them. They maybe loved his humour, too, and his kindness. He had other friends as well, who loved him for a certain quality. They loved him because they could talk about music. Someone else loved him, because they had the same taste in movies. The fans loved him, too. But they loved only the sides of him that he presented to them in public. Some loved him for his silliness, some for what they saw in his lyrics. Shou did not doubt their love like he did not doubt that his parents loved him. It was based on a role that Shou played for them, though. Son, artist, idol. Just with Yutaka he didn’t act. Yutaka did not only know about his humour; he also knew about the sadness he dragged along with himself. He did not only care for his music, but also for what he had to say. Sometimes, it seemed surprising to Shou that Yutaka knew him so well and had still picked him as a friend and vocalist of his band. He was the reason that Shou believed he actually had something to offer to the world. Yutaka was the only person who had ever chosen Shou for who he was. He was the one person who would not push him away.

But he needed Yutaka to know that he could not do it anyway.

All that knowledge wasn’t enough to make Shou feel brave.

All that Shou could do, was to touch Yutaka’s cheek and hope he understood the question Shou was asking silently.

Yutaka leaned in and kissed him.

Shou flinched and pulled back his hand immediately.

It hadn’t been a long kiss, just soft, dry lips brushing against his own.

“What do you think you are doing?”, he asked.

“Sorry”, Yutaka said. “It was the mood.”

He did not sound sorry. He also didn’t look like he was.

“That didn’t feel nearly as weird as I expected”, he added.

Shou wanted to cross the arms in front of himself, closing down on Yutaka physically. He couldn’t do so very well in his current position, though. He shifted slightly, but it did not help. The blanket shifted, too. His back was still cold.

“Why would you do that, if you thought it would feel weird?”, he huffed.

That was so typical for Yutaka. Shou had so many thoughts, they seemed to freeze him, until it was impossible to take any action anymore. Yutaka had only few thoughts. And he managed to ignore even those.

“And why would you think it’s weird?”, he added, feeling slightly offended by the assumption.

If Yutaka had kissed guys before, why would it be weird with Shou? They were friends after all. Good friends. If anything, it should be less weird.

“Ah, you know”, Yutaka said and his grin looked funny, tilted to the side with his cheek against the pillow. “I thought you’d punch me or something. You are so tense about those things. Like, I’m not even allowed to do it on stage, although you know the fans would love it.”

“It’s different on stage”, Shou said defensively. “I don’t want people to get the wrong idea.”

Yutaka raised his eyebrows at him. He raised them really high.

Shou had to admit that they had given people the wrong idea for quite some time already.

He huffed once more and turned his head away slightly.

He didn’t know how it was possible he had given Yutaka that impression. It was true that he wasn’t the most relaxed person, but it shouldn’t make the thought of kissing him impossible. Yutaka knew Shou loved him as a friend. Yutaka knew that Shou felt curious about guys. So, how had he reached the conclusion that Shou would be angry, if Yutaka kissed him? That Shou would make it weird?

He had to admit he wasn’t doing such a great job at not making it weird currently. Yutaka had done exactly what Shou had wanted him to do. He had kissed him. Now, Shou was acting offended.

“Well, you are right. It wasn’t weird”, Yutaka confirmed once more and then he just leaned in and kissed him again.

Shou pressed his lips shut. It was another short and dry kiss. It didn’t last long enough for him to focus on what Yutaka’s lips really felt like.

“Just because it didn’t feel weird isn’t a reason to do it again!”, he scolded as soon as Yutaka pulled back.

Yutaka laughed really quietly.

“I just needed to make sure it really is not weird”, he said. “Anyway, what would be a reason to do it again?”

“Well.” Shou made a gesture with his arms that he regretted immediately, because it pushed the blanket off his shoulder. His whole upper body was now feeling cold. “You only do something again, if it feels good, right?”, he said angrily.

He hated how Yutaka’s thoughts didn’t make sense sometimes. Admittedly, Shou had enough thoughts for two people already, but he wished not to be left alone with them.

In his mind, he was already writing songs about it. Because Shou didn’t really know how he felt about the situation. He wasn’t happy. He wasn’t excited either. He mostly felt angry and overwhelmed and annoyed that Yutaka seemed to be better at handling this as well. Shou was not build for living, he concluded. There was a serious construction error somewhere in his programming. If he just wrote about it, maybe things would become clearer to him.

“Alright”, Yutaka said. “It felt good then.”

Shou was expecting the kiss this time and out of curiosity leaned into it. It lasted longer and Yutaka shuffled closer. Shou could sense his body against his own. It felt different from a female body, less soft and less curvy, but aside from that it felt pretty much the same. He kept his eyes closed.

At the back of his head, a voice kept commenting. Shou wondered if everyone had this voice, that told them how they felt. That observed how Yutaka’s lips felt a little chopped and how he should maybe add more pressure to the kiss, or possibly lessen the pressure and how he should maybe open his lips or rather keep them closed. And the voice told him that he felt insecure and he wondered if everyone felt that insecure when kissing another person for the first time. And it reminded him of his first meeting with Yutaka and how he had never expected this to happen. Shou seemed to watch himself, and people used to say this happened during a traumatic experience, but to Shou it happened all the time. It happened when he kissed Yutaka back and it happened when he ate ice cream (stinging at his teeth, too cold to actually be sweet, the flavour only coming out once it melted on his tongue. How did people never talk about the fact that ice cream didn’t taste sweet from the very beginning?) and it happened when he was alone in the dark of night and tried to find words for that feeling that wasn’t quite sadness and wasn’t quite numbness, but something in between that just kept him from feeling happy.

Shou opened his eyes and Yutaka pulled back.

It had been a nice kiss, but Shou hadn’t been able to enjoy it. His mind kept racing. He wasn’t sure if he would be happier if he was able to put less distance between him and the things happening. Or if maybe he would break, if the distance disappeared, because the happiness would become happier, but the sadness would become sadder, too, and Shou was hardly able to handle the sadness now as it was.

“You know, I thought about something”, Shou said.

Yutaka grinned.

“What a surprise”, he said.

“Why left socks?”, Shou asked. “I mean, you can wear socks on both feet, right? It’s not like shoes. Even if it’s the wrong sock, it will still fit. Why would that be an issue?”

For a moment, Yutaka just stared at him. He didn’t even blink.

Then he burst out laughing.

Shou’s chest felt lighter immediately. The atmosphere felt less tense suddenly, as if a window had been opened, allowing in fresh air all of a sudden. Laughter was the only thing that made Shou stop observing himself for at least a short while. Maybe that was why he tried to be funny all the time. He wanted to lift the weight of other people’s shoulders.

Yutaka rolled onto his back, his chest heaving with laughter.

“I can’t believe you were thinking about my socks right now”, Yutaka stated. “But if you have to know – the problem is mainly, that now I don’t have enough socks with me at all. I’ll need to find a washing machine soon.”

“You forgot to bring enough socks”, Shou said and shook his head in disbelieve. “But you brought condoms.”

That observation had been bothering him for a while already. Was Yutaka planning to have sex with anyone during the tour? He was sharing a room with Shou! Did that mean he considered having sex with Shou during the tour? That thought was frightening. Or was he thinking of leaving him behind and finding a girl by chance? That thought was maddening. Or had he packed them by sheer accident, like the remote of his tv? That thought was disappointing.

“Duh”, Yutaka said. “I can’t wear condoms on my feet, though, can I?”

“Is that a challenge?”, Shou asked and rolled over, swinging his feet over the edge of the bed as if he intended to get up.

The motions didn’t cause a major discomfort anymore, but he still felt slightly dizzy when sitting up too fast.

“Oi, stay!”, Yutaka shouted and grabbed hold of Shou’s arm laughingly. He pulled him back and Shou let himself sink into the pillows again.

Yutaka snuggled close and pressed a gentle kiss against Shou’s temple.

“You have too many thoughts going on in that big head of yours”, he said. “So much space, and still you manage to make it crowded up there.”

Shou shrugged. He felt awful, just because Yutaka was so good at comforting him. He wished he could do the same for him, but in terms of friendship, Yutaka had definitely come off second best. Shou tried to be there for him, because Yutaka got sad, too. But there was always a reason for Yutaka’s sadness, that was what made them different. Yutaka had been sad when his parents urged him to get a job. He had been sad after break-ups. He had been sad over fights with friends. But he usually wasn’t sad like Shou, who just couldn’t bring himself to feel happy with his life and with himself, although he could see that technically there was nothing wrong with them. Now and then, Shou wondered if there was medication that might help him. But then he wasn’t even sure what the medication was supposed to do. Make the numbness disappear and make him feel things more clearly? Or dim his feelings to a level that was finally bearable? He didn’t even know if he wanted to feel more or if he wanted to feel less. Both was tiring and sometimes, he just wished for it to be over. Yutaka would be hurt, but he would get over it. Shou had always needed Yutaka more than Yutaka needed him. He didn’t know how he would explain it to his family, but then again, it wouldn’t be his problem anymore. And the fans. They would feel hurt, but they would move on to someone else. Yutaka and Kenji and Jun, they would take care of them. And after him, there would be other artists to follow. It wouldn’t be the end of the world for anyone but Shou.

But then he thought of all the songs he hadn’t written yet. There was so much music in his head, still, and so many words. He needed to write about tonight, too. Because he was confused about his feelings, but if he put them into words properly, maybe he would understand them. And maybe he would feel better then. Maybe, he would feel less sad already, as soon as he was sober again. And if he managed to find the right words, maybe he could explain himself to Yutaka as well. Because Shou couldn’t tell him how he felt right now. But if he turned it into a song, Yutaka might understand what he couldn’t explain to him now. In the end, Shou had only ever wanted to explain his thoughts to Yutaka, the rest of the world was just an extra. He knew that some people understood what he wanted to express with his songs and that it actually helped them. Shou wanted to help them. But the secret was that he didn’t try to explain himself to strangers. He tried to explain himself to only one person, someone whom he loved and whom he trusted, and the fans could sense that. They could feel the honesty and the vulnerability, because Shou shared with them what was only meant for Yutaka.

He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

“Just tell me what you need right now”, Yutaka said softly.

Shou opened his eyes again, without looking at him. He was staring at the ceiling instead.

“I need time to think. I need to sleep. I need to think some more tomorrow, when my thoughts are clear and I know it’s not just the alcohol thinking for me”, he said.

He expected Yutaka to say something funny or to scold him or to grow impatient with him like everyone seemed to grow impatient with Shou sooner or later. Shou wasn’t a slow thinker. That was the problem. He thought fast and the thoughts kept coming, one after another and another and another. And in between, Shou got lost, because some of those thoughts were contradicting each other and some were questions he couldn’t find an answer to. Shou wanted to know if he actually felt attracted to men, or if he was just so lonely, he adjusted his standards. He wanted to know, if he was in love with Kyan Yutaka, or if he just lacked acceptance in himself so much, that he mistook honest friendship for something else too easily. He wanted to know if he was numb or sad and if the thoughts were his problem or the emotions. He wanted to know who he was. He wanted to write songs about everything on his mind, because maybe then the voices would finally go quiet and if he just put everything into words properly, maybe Shou would finally be at peace.

“Okay”, Yutaka agreed without hesitation. He got up on his side of the bed.

The sheets suddenly felt colder and Shou was scared of being left alone. He was aware that it was illogical, because he usually needed a lot of space and because he hated not being able to turn around freely while falling asleep and because he was not used to sharing the bed with anyone, since he had slept alone most of his adult life, but fact was, that he slept so much better with someone by his side. A lot of people had told him before that it was the part, they hated most about relationships – having to share their bed. And Shou wasn’t exactly cuddly either. For him, it didn’t have to be an embrace. He didn’t need to fall asleep in someone’s arms. But just a light touch, an arm against his, an elbow against his back, and he drifted off to slumber when usually it took him hours to stop the thoughts and finally get some rest. Maybe it was a primal instinct that most humans had lost already but that Shou was still holding on to. The feeling of having someone next to him made him feel calm and protected and the touch of another made him feel safe. He didn’t want Yutaka to leave.

“Don’t go”, he said quietly.

“Don’t worry”, Yutaka said with a cheeky grin. “I’m far too lazy to clear my bed anyway. I will just switch off the lights.”

Shou followed him through the room with his eyes. When Yutaka turned the switch, it was completely black around him for a moment. His eyes hadn’t adjusted to the darkness yet. Obviously, Yutaka’s eyes hadn’t adjusted to it yet, either, because Shou heard a loud clattering and Yutaka swearing under his breath.

He chuckled at the sound of it. Then Yutaka reached the bed and Shou felt him slip under the blanket. There was a lot of pulling and tearing until both of them were covered, but finally, Shou felt cosy enough.

Yutaka had rolled over, turning his back on Shou.

Shou reached out, putting his hand against Yutaka’s back lightly. They were not touching in any other way, but for Shou it was enough to know that he was there. It felt good to sense him close and still keep his personal space.

He closed his eyes and slowly, his breath became even.

He felt safe. He felt as if Yutaka was shielding him for the outside world. This close to him, Shou existed in his own realm. It was his own private part of the world, where he was able to collect his thoughts. Here, he was able to turn those overwhelming, downweighing thoughts into songs. Because, in the end, he wrote all his songs about Yutaka. About him chopping vegetables and about him applying makeup and about him drunk kissing Shou in a hotel room. And he wrote all of his songs for Yutaka, because he wanted to be understood by him of all people. He wanted to apologize to him and he wanted to explain how life made him feel and he wanted to tell him how much Yutaka meant to him. And as long as he hadn’t found the words yet, Shou still had something that kept him going. A desire to be understood and the hope that he made others feel understood, too, somewhere along the way. And as long as he hadn’t found the words yet, Shou’s world didn’t end. Yutaka protected it.

#Golden Bomber #Kiryuuin Shou #Kyan Yutaka #kirikyan #fanfiction #fanfic #I considered adding more paragraphs but I wanted to illustrate how overwhelming and crowded Kirisho's thoughts feel

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meangirlsx · 6 years ago

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So I saw Mean Girls last night and I have some things I wanted to share with you all:

Everyone is hotter in person

Literally everyone

It shouldn’t be possible and yet it is

We know Barrett is a belting queen but HOLY SHIT

She make it looks like it’s easy and she sounds even more amazing live

She’s adorable and hilarious and intimidating all at the same time

Everything about Erika just screams Disney princess

Her voice, her smile, her mannerisms, her personality, everything

Grey accidentally spit in her face at the beginning of the show and she reacted in character like she didn’t want to make him feel bad but she couldn’t not wipe it off

All of the dancing is INCREDIBLE

Every single member of the ensemble puts their whole heart and soul in it

I want their wig master to do my hair every day

Seriously there were so many gorgeous hairstyles and specifically a lot of impressive braids

I wouldn’t mind the costumer dressing me every day, too

Devon was on for Gretchen and she was actual human sunshine

She was so adorable and SO outstanding

Jonalyn is also actual human sunshine

And lowkey she has amazing abs

Becca was on in the ensemble and she is SUCH an incredible dancer

Ixchel was also on and she is totally hilarious

We know Taylor is also a belting queen but HOLY SHIT 2.0

She just wails on her notes and makes it look effortless

And god she embodies Regina so well with the strut and the stage presence and you don’t want to look away

When the Plastics do their slow-mo walk in the mall, Kate pretends to roll her ankle very dramatically and then signals to the audience that she’s fine, all totally still in slow-mo

The cast has said they can see everyone in the audience because the set has so many LED screens

We were in the front row and I can confirm they really do look at you

Kate and I stared at each other for a few moments when she was laying upside down on the floor of Regina’s bedroom and truly I have been blessed

She is lethally funny but also gives Karen a really grounded, authentic feel

The ensemble talks about how their characters have story arcs throughout the show that can change, like one week two characters will be dating and the next week you could see them break up

You can definitely follow these if you’re looking for them

Like Riza’s character, Sophie, had a huge crush on Aaron at the beginning of the show

And I think it was Jonalyn and Brendon who kissed in the school hallway like halfway through the show

They might have tracks on the floor to help guide the desks and other smaller set pieces that roll on and off but the aim is just so impressive

Like someone will just push a couch off toward someone in the wings ready to grab it and they never miss

They also throw so many different props to each other and I know that takes a lot of practice and they will drop them at some point but it’s so coordinated it’s insane

Nothing can prepare you for seeing Sexy Abraham Lincoln and Sexy Corn in person

Or for seeing Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt smack her own ass tbh

Erika and Barrett had a fight with either imaginary swords or light sabers during Revenge Party (at least I think that’s when it was)

Erika puts so much humor and emotion into her little sung narration moments

After the Mathletes try to rap at the talent show and Principal Duvall shuts them down and they’re goofing around for a few more seconds, Nikhil looked at me and quietly said, “Call me” and then did the same to another girl a few seats over

When they’re displaying photos of the disaster ending of “Rockin’ Around the Pole,” it looked like they just photoshopped Devon’s face onto Ashley’s body, but I could be wrong about that

We never really see Regina being friendly and appreciative with Gretchen, but after Cady’s taken over and Gretchen has her reprise of “What’s Wrong With Me?” outside of the school, Cady comes back on and asks if she’s coming with her, and Erika has this sweet smile and fondness in her voice that’s a nice distinction from Regina’s reign

“Whose House Is This?” really is that lit and wild

Kyle’s part in “More Is Better” sounded exactly like it does on the album except for one note at the very end

Kyle gives off such a strong awkward-but-genuinely-sweet sort of Disney prince vibe as Aaron

I want to know how Taylor manages to throw the papers so perfectly in “World Burn” so that they cascade back down because it’s magical

After Regina’s hit by the bus and Janis and Damian are talking to the audience, when they bring up that Regina was technically dead for 15 seconds, Barrett just keeps making faces and gestures as if to say, “That’s what I’ve been saying!”

Also other than those asides to the audience, there’s almost no time that Barrett and Grey have onstage where they’re not touching each other in some way

And it’s almost always really cuddly, like hanging over each other’s shoulders and hugging

Their comedic timing together is truly unparalleled

Grey really just gives it his all and puts his entire goddamn heart on that stage

And oh my god he really is That Funny

And afterwards, at the stage door, he was just so nice to everyone

You can tell he really loves the fanbase

Kyle was also really nice

Let’s be honest everyone who came out was really nice

After my dad took a picture of me with Kyle and we thanked him, Kyle put on this adorable goofy grin and said, “Thanks, Dad!”

Nikhil asked the name of every single person who wanted to interact with him and he would repeat it back, usually with some nice comment about the name like he just wants everyone to know he appreciates them

Jonalyn was so sweet and she gives off such a Disney princess vibe, too, and you can tell she has so much love to share with everyone

People always scream when a cast member comes out to stage door, but when Devon walked out, it was like twice as loud

Devon’s immediate response was to give this huge smile and wave to everyone and really excitedly shout, “Hi, guys!”

She asked everyone she talked to how they were doing and genuinely wanted to know the answer

Collins and Riza also came out and were really friendly with everyone

That’s everyone who came out to stage door

Seriously the show was phenomenal

Every cast member was stunning and every technical aspect of the show was kind of mind-blowing

I swear I’ve never felt more bi than watching this entire cast

If anyone needs a friend to talk to about this show at any point, I’m officially more obsessed than I already was and am literally always happy to talk about it

#mean girls #mean girls musical #mean girls broadway

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quincywillows · 5 years ago

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MAGGIE YOURE WRITING A BOOK????? WHY DIDNT I, YOU LOCAL YOUTH LIBRARIAN KNOW ABOUT THIS. Maggie give me all the details you feel comfortable sharing

if you’re able to or even want to share how far would you say you are into writing your novel like a few chapters or half the book or even more also are we allowed to hear like a quick blurb on what it’s about ?

well first let me say i’m so tickled that y’all are interested!!! seriously that makes my little writer heart very warm :’)

so actually if y’all have been around for a hot minute, you probably actually know a version of this story – it’s quincy willows, which long ago had its roots as one of my many trillion gmw aus. in fall 2018, i had written a couple of one shots for it and originally outlined it like a show (kind of like ambition or cotu), but the more i thought about it the more it felt like a novel / meant for prose. it also felt like… bigger than an au given that i was doing all this creative work and worldbuilding for it and the characters only had these menial attachments to their original source, so i scrapped it and took it all down and decided i wanted to try and do more with it.

flash forward to my graduation, where i knew i wanted to work on something that wasn’t screenplays considering i had just spent 4 years doing that and wanted to work with something fresh. i had been marinating the plot of qw, so in may i sat down and just�� outlined the entire thing. story phase by story phase, beat by beat, and realized that i had the whole story right there in front of me. i had given it enough thought by that point that it was its own narrative and i knew like. okay. i’m ready to try actually writing this. so here we are, two months later! i’ll go into the actual plot under a cut because i know i’m gonna ramble excitedly LMAO

as for what it’s actually about… the narrative kind of takes on two main plots. the first is that our main protagonist, jonah lee anderson, arrives in the quaint new hampshire town of quincy willows because he was taken in by a foster family there after his abuela passed away. but even from the moment jonah is dropped off, something about the town seems… just a little bit strange. for example, his driver isn’t allowed to take him into town because it’s “private property,” even though they’re just surrounded by woods. only when jonah is left there alone with no service to reach his foster parents, he feels like… the forest is whispering. he’s always had an overactive imagination, but he doesn’t think he’s making this up. luckily his foster father moe arrives and helps get him into town, but he’s not going to forget that weird moment.

and the weird things just continue to stack up. for whatever reason, almost everyone in town seems to hate him or have this derision towards him despite not knowing a thing about him. people keep making weird comments towards him, like about his smell or how his mere presence is irritating or disruptive. the gang of white boys who all lowkey look the same take to bullying him because they can, because they’ve decided he’s different. and oh yeah, there was that time he was walking back from the cafe late at night and is 100% sure his snarky classmate turned into a demon and almost killed him. but everyone just tells him they don’t know what he could be talking about – and it isn’t until jonah stumbles upon what looks like some kind of demonic seance in the middle of the woods and thinks he spots their class president, cassie hatheway, participating, that he decides he’s got to figure all of this out.

of course, he’s not the only one interested in this mystery. another school outcast, xavier petrov, questions him when he starts digging his nose into things. and after a very strange confrontation with their student VP connor rose (and the “leader” of the white boy pack), xavier reveals that he orchestrated their fight to test one of his theories. and he thinks it worked – didn’t jonah see that moment where it looked like connor had fangs? after a chat at the cafe, jonah and xavier agree to an unlikely partnership to try and figure out what the hell is up with quincy willows that xav has been trying to figure out for… like, as long as he can remember.

further shenanigans aside, what we come to learn by the first half of the book is that the reason jonah sticks out like a sore thumb is because he’s not like everyone else in qw. because everyone in the town is a supernatural of some kind, and he is damningly and distractingly Normal, a “normie” whose internal clean pure energy is so imposing that it’s near irritating for the supernatural residents of quincy.

but that’s not the only reason they hold derision towards him. as the first part of the book unfolds, there are a lot of hints to how the forest that surrounds and protects their town (the one that seemed to be whispering, yeah) is starting to weirdly decay. and they all think it’s jonah’s fault, because this has happened in their history before. it’s a dark and twisted part of their town tale, and after xavier and jonah figure out that first mystery they get pulled into trying to track down what’s causing the forest decay to clear jonah’s name, save the nymph population and even greater, the town as a whole.

that’s like the very bare bones of the plot and doesn’t get into the subplots and all that, but there are some very key things i wanted to get into when writing this story. one is just that… fun slightly campy feeling of supernatural series we love (harry potter, twilight) but with a confused male protagonist. i wanted a boy protagonist to be the one who is the odd one out, who is clueless and lost, but also loves so deeply and selflessly and is searching for his own place to belong. additionally, while there is a few different romances in the story, the main relationship in the first book is the friendship ( / one-sided crush) between jonah and xavier. with the exception of like… trc, i can’t really think of a supernatural YA series where a healthy friendship between males is allowed to be the focal point. so that was important to me too.

but i really… i don’t even know how to explain how much i love working on this book. the characters are all so fun to write and exist so easily in this universe. basically all of the 8 core young adult protagonists are queer in some capacity, and ¾ of the main 4 are poc. xavier is canonically autistic. i think that YA has the amazing power to be inclusive in a way that a lot of “prestige” work isn’t, and i wanted to lean into that full throttle with this trilogy. i just… i love it. i love it! i’m really excited to share it with y’all as i go

i didn’t really talk about my process for writing it, but if you want to ask feel free because i feel like this is already so long FDJSKLJDLKGJDFL. but thank you again for asking, it means so so much to me

#project: quincy willows #i cannot express how deeply i love this project #novel talk #THANK YOU MADS <3 #madelinecoffee #ask and you shall receive #but long story short it's supernatural YA LOL

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zepdeans · 5 years ago

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there’s not a lot I can say about s3 that hasn’t already been said (and articulated 200x better) but! here are some of my (albeit dumb) thoughts :~)

ep1 -isak leaning against the bathroom wall gets me EVERY time its such a powerful scene esp introducing you to s3 and tarjei..... spare some talent for the rest of us please -LiTeN gUtTeN fRa StRaNgEr tHiNgS -isak rly ties his pants w a shoelace...... -isak noticing even for the first time bc of his laugh.. whew.... also. i love this intro SOOO much bc its so non-monumental? theres no dramatic music or whatever but its not subtle.... like you know right away o shit love interest!! hello sir!! bc isak’s expression watching him :’) i could go on -isak is a bad liar HOWEVER this only applies to stupid nontrivial things e.g. the black sweatshirt. but when you look at him lying about like, his sexuality, he hides that shit well -”c00l” isak. i hate u so much -honestly all u have to do is look at even for .2 seconds and u can tell this boy has had a crush for a solid month bc he just looks awestruck (HOWEVER henrik’s acting is *chef’s kiss* bc its subtle enough to go undetected b4 you actually know eVEN SAW HIM ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL) -even isak and emma all sitting on the bench together is funny enough on its on but then a song called threeway comes on and like. julie sdshjsfdjfkjskd ep2 -there’s something so endearing about even’s handwriting idek what -i LOVE even’s video w mikael it reveals so much about him to us- how weird (ok we saw how weird he was w the paper towel thing but) and dorky he is? and his love of film! his view on love stories and how he sees the world :( but it also shows a lot abt isak because he saw even making stupid jokes about vladimir putin and was like yeah we about to fall in LOVE love -isak not using headphones to watch even’s video or r+j?? bde or general incompetence what’s the verdict guys -the isak watching r+j scene hits so hard like yall ever think about isak lying in bed at 3am staring at the ceiling probably thinking about how he’s never gonna get a beautiful world-shattering romance like that like ..... also him changing positions skam get out of my life go away ur too realistic -not to make this even more self-projection-y but isak simultaneously being the least emotionally vulnerable person ever but crying during r+j > -i made a post abt this already but even’s INTENSE staring vs isak’s “i have never looked anyone in the eye in my life” gets me it says so much about their characters -even said i see your bde move (asking me to buy you beer) and i raise u with my own (inviting you to my house after faking not having my id) -”if you listen to music” even is such a dick fsdjhsdff -when the message comes on...... i rlly do owe julie my life huh -”have you heard about my rapping?” “I have actually” have we talked about this enough????? 1. isak finally feels comfortable enough w even to flirt and his first move is to RAP for him jesus christ. keep in mind this is the same man who pulled that smooth af ibuprofen line w emma like...... 2. even has heard about isak’s rapping. either this means im-not-on-social-media even went out of his way to go thru homeboy’s instagram OR isak’s rapping is actually talked about. i- -the group chat messages. cant believe i forgot about the 2016 clown epidemic

ep3 -mahdi is a good friend and i love him. thank u -even wearing isak’s cap until he chucks it at him sjksfjsdjsd -how much yall wanna bet isak’s been listening to illmatic on repeat since last friday thinking abt even (even tho meeting sonja shattered his heart a lil) [also kinda an aside but i think a lot about how isak n even bonded over rap and how some homophobic lyrics in 90s etc rap might have impacted them? or how that little detail ties into julie’s story? e.g. halftime by nas, which is on illmatic] -whats worse. even staring into isaks soul wearing a size xs see-through white t shirt or isak staring at even for five (5) seconds before chugging his beer and immediately making out w emma. OR even crashing that party before it can start “i think you guys are bonding too much” cheesy ass shjhfsdhskdf -yall act like evak didnt invent hands. did even shaking isak’s shoulder telling him his apartment is nice mean nothing to u -im convinced robyn wrote call your girlfriend for this scene specifically bc how could anything fit so perfectly by coincidence -is anything better than egging isak on- even bech naesheim (2016) -idk if yall have read the scripts but i love the sock thing so much bc its soo true to how isak thinks and it makes everything so much more interesting and !!!

ep4 -i will never get over even sending isak bad seinfeld memes -even smacking open isak’s locker. first of all whew second of all u think as soon as he got into the stairwell he lowkey cried bc ow -parallel of isak saying “it’s 2016, why are you religious?” to sana vs. emma’s “it’s 2016, get out of the closet” to isak anyone :( -”takk sanasol!!!!” thank u isak for my life -I wanted to be with you aloneeeee -even’s face when he sees the pool like we get it youre a director -how many times do i need to say even is such a dick sjkfsd “does it look like i care about my hair?” “usually but not right now” like this would only work on isak i love soulmates!! -even just.. fully choking isak out ssdhgfd got em -when the first notes of im kissing you start ooh boy -even going in for the kill kiss and isak going from huh to oooo shit and pushing his lips out at the last minute. phenomenal

ep5 -ngl as soon as im not in love comes on my heart goes uwu bc like!!!! that song the meaNING.... them......... i jus love this scene sm like theyre in their own little bubble and they both feel so comfortable and at peace :(( -even leaving isak comics about an inside joke of theirs like yall mind if i scream -isak feeling left out from the conversation and his friends whew i felt that... and having them talk about how gross it is to makeout with a girl w facial hair?? blease :( -taking stock of isak’s nicknames: issy k, isabell, izzy, baby jesus, -im not even gonna bother trying to articulate thoughts on Pause bc it’s a literal masterpiece. thank u tarjei henrik and julie for inventing television with this one -MAGNUS SDFKJSDFJKDSHK "oooh my name is Jonas and I love idealism and reading klassekampen and I don’t like plastic and I skate on a skateboard made of sustainable wood and wear old clothes because new clothes are bad for the environment and I only drink recycled water” screAMMM -what i said abt pause also applies to pride ugh its such a powerful scene and!! the beginning of kicks to isaks stomach. honestly what i fucking love about this episode is how it goes from hell yea best day w even ever to crying in the street within one week (s3 had the best balance of angst and payoff thanks) -even’s Soft Party Flannel... forever tainted by this scene rip -not knowing why even kissed sonja keeps me up at night -speaking of. how used and stupid isak must’ve felt when he saw even completely unbothered, hooking up w his ex at this party?? whew :( -bros is one of my all time favourite clips solely bc of the music?? lift me up gives me chills and when hold my liquor starts i LOSE it -ep5 and 6 remind me of that quote “to see what your characters are really made of you have to break them” because julie rlly goes all in and god it hurts so good

ep6 -never have i ever seen insomnia portrayed as accurately as tarjei did here and i remember when i first watched the cantina scene i was like. winded bc its SO true to sleep deprivation whew -i really like that isak wasnt together with even when he reached out for help and came out to jonas. bc it was him, on his own, being strong enough to talk to his friends and then eventually he was confident and secure enough in himself to be in a good place when even started reaching back out!! -i have no idea what its like to come out to someone, to be afraid of your friends rejecting you, everything isak went through. but tarjei’s acting of when, like, you have something you KNOW you have to tell someone, and youve put yourself in the position where youre going to have to tell them, but youre terrified and eventually just force yourself SAY the words?? -and isak’s smile when he realizes jonas is gonna be his bro no matter what :’)))

ep7 -weirdly one of my favourite isak looks (black t-shirt grey snapback c-c-c-combo) -”what’s your name again?” have i mentioned i love sana and isak bc i love sana and isak -jonas truly is the best friend oh man. perceptive, thoughtful, loving, laidback, a friggen BRO. tbh i was wary of him in s1 and thought he didn’t treat eva well (tho I recognized he loved her a lot, he was just bad at being a boyfriend) but jonas in s3?? just goes to show how powerful your perspective of someone can change viewing them in a different role!! because while jonas was a crappy bf, he literally is SUCH an incredible friend and his actions and words and just! him! in s3 completely redeemed any illwill I had towards him :’) -maybe im a little gay (up there with other s3 comedy classics such as “thats a boys name”) -mahdi season WHEN ugh a legend -’when someone asks isak if hes going to a family party’ literally what other reason for living do i have if not to read the boy squad text convos -isaks locker finally opening and his smile at evens drawing whewwwwwww!! also even rlly is that guy who wont text you back but will leave hand written love letters in ur locker -also. another stellar look from valtersen -slutt a meld meg is a whole masterpiece like what other piece of media has the RANGE -eskild: play hard to get. jonas: no smiley!!! isak: nah fam im good B)

ep8 -this episode is BEAUTIFUL bc you feel practically euphoric?? like hell yeah theyre finally together!! isak is out and accepted and even is done with sonja! but theres also this unsettling undercurrent of worry bc you know deep down something isnt right? why is sonja calling isak? why is even acting kinda strange? whats going on? yknow?? -literally never going to get over 5 fine frokner :~) even is such a goddamn nerd and he’s the man of isak’s dreams can u believe!! -sana’s little speech is SO important in so many ways ooo i love her so much -also have we discussed eskild making evak do a photoshoot for him. highkey those are my favourite pictures of ALL time u can tell even was like hm strange but im down while isak was more omg guys stop🙄 omg haha eskild i cant believe youre making me cuddle with even for a photo🙄 i cant believe ur making me snuggle this dude for a pic!!!! definitely would not have done this otherwise!!! -magnus only realizing it’s THAT even after seeing how isak looks at him. whew -isak is so brave i rlly love that kid! his text to his mamma <3 -no r*make will EVER nail text conversations like mari/julie did w evak’s this week thanks for coming to my ted talk. i'd quote the best ones but it would literally double the length of this post (ok ill cave. “hahaha shut up❤️” GETS me) -you dont know whats in store but you know what youre here for. hallo -isak running around oslo with even’s clothes looking for him :( his heart is so big he cares about even so so much -when Part II (on the run) comes on in the credits its like a kick in the teeth honestly

ep9 -ive already screamed enough about cherry wine but god it fucks me up -cannot put into words how much I love eskild and how good of a person he is, he just has so much love in his heart -”wait they have waffles here? see ya” -this convo is why i love skam so much!!!! magnus giving insight and good thoughtful advice to isak was such a brilliant move by julie (also truLy heartwarming) bc like. magnus is a flawed layered character! he’s dumb and ignorant and not very careful with his words BUT hes also such a sweet guy. i genuinely dont think he would hurt a fly and him talking about vilde (in ep10) is ;-; bc he really likes her and respects her and wants to be a gentleman! hes so loving and just. yeah. also i wonder if isak and magnus (and vilde) ever talked about having mentally ill parents and lent on each other for support bc like....<3 [sidenote- this is why i HATE b***** like they absolutely massacred magnus’s character and magnus did not deserve that!] -det er bare slutt........ very cool of tarjei to invent acting here. also the character development makes me WEEP like at first isak lied and told his pappa it was over bc its easier to brush stuff off and say you were joking than be vulnerable especially about 1. having a boyfriend and 2. saying youve already broken up?? but then isak was like hey im done with lying about who i am bc i want my life to be REAL and he told his dad the truth even if it was hard and even if he was trying rlly hard not to cry -isak reaching out to even<3 standing up for even<3 -o helga natt. another scene i genuinely cannot comment on bc u cant really put into any written language how magical and breathtaking and heartbreaking and powerful and brilliant this scene is. so. -jk. obvs i cant say anything intelligent enough to give this scene justice but probably the most stunning piece of television i have ever had the privilege of watching. even’s text breaks my heart every gd time (esp since we never really see this side of him before finding out he’s bipolar? his guilt, insecurity, feeling like a burden, being scared of losing everyone in his life because he thinks he’ll hurt them). the music is SO beautiful i cry real tears as soon as the strings start. also the brilliance of JUST o helga natt playing and no dialogue except for isaks one line? isak’s realization when he sees the cross. him RUNNING across oslo to go to even. the FLASHBACKS all going backwards in chronological order until them smoking on the bench. isak looking at the bench and not seeing even and u can feel his heart breaking and urs breaks too! but then he remembers the bathroom and he turns and theres even and whewwww. du er ikke alene<3

ep10 -minutt for minutt is THE most healing clip im telling u. and like.. seeing even depressed really is hard and as someone who was very very depressed for 4-ish yrs of their life it rlly hits me? like when youre in an especially bad funk and you cant get out of bed and youre just numb and exhausted and feel so shitty and u want to be alone but you really dont???? could go on but literally i owe henrik holm my life for his portrayal of even -not to be a soft bitch on main but when isak tucks the blanket over even and it keeps getting pulled off his back so isak just. covers that spot with himself? -i do love that call between sonja and isak bc once again! a flawed (realistic) human being -and isak thinking its his fault even is depressed? it means a lot that sonja told him its no ones fault, even is just bipolar. and i wonder if isak felt that way about his mamma as well, guilty for her being ill, and if what sonja said made him feel better about that situation too :( -lowkey random but when isak is rambling really fast and he goes “maybe we’ll get bombed tomorrow and talking about all this is a waste of time” it continually punches me in the throat bc that is /exactly/ how i ramble and think like tarjei........ pls -like eskild said. there really is so much love in isak’s little grumpy teenage body<3 -isak no longer just passively accepting life as its given to him, now he fights for him and even!!!!! -isak is such a forgiving person and seeing him able to just accept things and move on? incredible -i remember when i first watched ep1 i was like oooo even and isak are gonna be kosegruppa partners and thats when theyll first get together, cooking food or smth!! but lmfao after episode 3? kosegruppa whomst???? also hilarious vilde thought isak of all people would willingly sign up for kosegruppa just to go to revue parties -even and linn friendship!!!! -cannot articulate how mf heartwarming it is to see even smiling and being more himself after being depressed (also thank u julie for having ups and downs coming out of his depression- its so true to life having one day when youre feeling awesome and then the next you feel awful again for no reason and its SO frustrating) -I had to stop watching passe pa meg cause it made me toooooo crazy! it would just be like: “I like seeing you laugh” and I was like: *SCREAMS* -im the fucking master of lying 😤 -literally don’t know why isak and even ragging on kosegruppa is so funny but “did you think I joined to have fun” gets me every time -I SAW YOU THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL -also even literally radiating love @ isak watching get snarky w vilde on the phone bc it reminded him of the first time he saw him! even rly is that boyfriend who thinks isak being pissy is the Best Thing he has Ever seen -halla boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz -literally the glo up of isak telling his friends the order in which he’d bang them -No filter! wow I love symbolism -so nice to see the girls together for a lil bit :) -the boys hyping up mags while also telling him to be respectful awwwwww -take desperate to a whole new level- Confucius -who’s going to show isak how to properly hold a beer can -literally evak banter gets me thru the day. thank u tarjei and henrik for having phenomenal chemistry + improvisation skills + making isak and even the dumbest nerdiest boys i have ever seen -biology partner. and friend. ;-; -even literally is the biggest stoner blease -isak’s talk with eva is just sooooo<3 and not to be emo on main but every single word of the last few sentences he says hit me so gd hard because i feel the exact same way in my BONES -livet er nå 💛

final thoughts :( <3 -this season is so special. it feels like one really long oscar-worthy movie or smth?? i cant even exblain, its just magical. ALSO very dear to my heart. -julie really said you guys have seen isak sad and alone and repressed for the past two seasons so heres him falling in love with the best person in the world and coming to terms with who he is and being brave and opening up and finally being happy and living a real life -this season definitely feels different from s1/2/4 to me editing or production or music smth wise? as in, its got a lot fewer aesthetic shots and the cinematography seems a bit different if that makes any sense???? I also think this is the season most focused just on the main (i.e. not many- if any? sideplots going on) -literally will never get over the thought, love, and detail put into this season. when i say there is literally nothing i would change about it, i mean it and coming from my nitpicky ass??? means a lot lmfao. the acting, directing, music choices, symbolism...... sublime -s3′s cold rainy autumn aesthetic makes me ACHE for fall and also nostalgic for a highschool experience I never had lmao?? also. all the nighttime clips >>> -don’t know what else to say except thank u skam for my life

#take a shot every time i say whew #fully put more effort and time into this than most of my uni projects xx #its super rambly but thats bc its mostly just my direct stream of thought #also super long! and probably still missing things i wanted to say #AND like 3 weeks late fshfjjkdjkfsd #skam #clownfest 2019 #blabbey

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chasholidays · 6 years ago

Note

Could you please do a Bellamy POV of Bromans episode 8? Specifically including Clarke’s fight with Ontari because I’ve always wondered what the his and the cast’s reactions were!

Original fic here!

By the last episode of Bromans, Bellamy is generally prepared for the worst. Or, if not the worst, at least the most absurd and least good for him, personally. That’s the general Broman vibe.

Well, okay, the Clarke thing was good. Bromans is the best thing that’s happened to his relationship with her in years, but it’s unclear how much credit the show itself deserves for that. It’s not like the producers were trying to get him and Clarke together, and while the forced proximity was definitely a factor, that was entirely his and Clarke’s decision. The challenges haven’t made a huge difference, give or take the one where he had to ID Clarke’s breasts. But, again, they weren’t trying to destroy his sanity or upgrade his relationship, and it’s not like it helped with his general mental state.

So he feels pretty comfortable saying that Bromans is trying to kill him and never gives him anything good. Anything good he gets from it is incidental and unintentional. At best, the show is ridiculous.

Which means that when Murphy takes them away after breakfast on the second-to-last day, he’s expecting something especially terrible. Any deviation from the routine is usually a red flag, especially this late in the game.

“Seriously, no hints?” he asks Murphy.

Murphy glances over his shoulder. “What part of our whole vibe makes you think I’m going to give you hints? That’s not the dynamic we’ve got going. I don’t actually like you.”

“Bullshit,” says Dax. “He’s totally your favorite.”

“That doesn’t mean I like him,” Murphy shoots back, without missing a beat. “It just means I hate all you other assholes more. No offense.”

“Ah yes, the elusive inoffensive I hate all you assholes,” says Roan, dry as sand. “Very hard to pull off.”

“Whatever, I’m not telling anyone shit, so who cares what my personal ranking of favorites is? Legatus will tell you when he tells you.”

“He’ll be taking each of you aside individually,” Anya puts in. At least it’s someone’s job to be helpful. “Order will be Dax, Roan, Ilian, Bellamy. Once you’re done with Legatus, you’ll have individual interviews, and then you’ll go back to your girlfriends together. All clear?”

They chorus their agreement, used to this kind of thing by now, and speculate on what might be coming as they walk. The most convincing theory to Bellamy is that they’re doing some sort of individual physical trial, although everyone has their own idea of what he specifics will be. Roan is sure they’ll have to fight Lincoln in single combat, but Bellamy has to believe that’s not true. Lincoln would wipe the floor with him and Octavia would mock him for the rest of their lives. And, honestly, none of them are up to beating Lincoln in a fight, so there’s no way that can be it. They already have enough footage of everyone getting their asses kicked in training, they don’t need more.

But having to complete some weird strength test to prove their worthiness feels completely on brand for the show, and Bellamy can probably do that. He was in good shape before the show started, and the daily workouts and challenges definitely have him even better off. He’s not the best physical specimen on the show, but he still likes his odds to win, depending on the challenges.

Going last in any event is always a little stressful, especially when he doesn’t see the people doing it before him, but the good news is that no one’s paying any attention to what he’s up to, so he and Miller can just play Words With Friends while they wait.

It’s weird, the knowledge that he’s going to miss this. This ridiculous show and these ridiculous people. This whole ridiculous experience.

“Bellamy,” says Anya, pulling his attention from Miller. “Your turn.”

“If I die, tell Clarke to never let my sister live it down,” he says.

“Not that you love her?”

“She knows that. She might not know she killed me.” He wipes his hands on his tunic and stands, goes into the tent where Lincoln is waiting.

He and Lincoln haven’t been one-on-one very often, which is nice, if he’s honest. When they’re out in the open with all the other contestants, it’s a lot easier to remember that this is Legatus, their training master, not Lincoln, his almost brother-in-law.

“Legatus,” he says, with a nod.

The smile is all Lincoln. “Bellamy. Congratulations on making it this far, I knew you could. And I didn’t even have to cheat for you.”

“Would you tell me if you had?”

“Probably. I’d feel bad sooner or later.” He clears his throat. “Okay, real take?”

“Real take.”

It’s like flipping a switch; Lincoln’s face smooths out, going hard and serious, and suddenly he’s Legatus. “Bellamy. You have fought hard and overcome much, and now we have come to the end of the road. Tomorrow, we’ll find out if you have what it takes to earn your place among the Bromans. But no matter the outcome, you have proved yourself as a warrior.”

“Thank you.”

“In recognition of your accomplishments, I have prepared something for you. A gift.”

“A gift?” he blurts out, too surprised to remember to stay in some kind of character. “You’re giving gifts now?”

“You have done well, you deserve to be rewarded.” He claps his hands and a couple extras come in with–

Armor. Actual, real-life armor. It’s so fucking badass.

“Seriously?”

“You’ve earned it,” says Lincoln, letting probably a little too much sincerity bleed through into his voice. But he recovers fast. “Now, don’t let me down. Fight bravely tomorrow and show me what you’re made of!”

“I will.” He can’t help flashing a grin; they can cut it. “Thanks.”

Lincoln smiles back. “You’re welcome.”

After the unexpected gift of his own set of armor, Bellamy really isn’t sure what to expect next from the producers. It really could go anywhere at this point, so going back to the cesspit for the girls’ last challenge is actually a little disappointing. Clarke, at least, is excited, but she has a good history there. If he’d figured out how to (lowkey) cheat in as many challenges in the cesspit as she had, he’d like it too.

And it was kind of where they had their first kiss. That part was cool too. But he was hoping for something a little more dramatic.

“This should be straightforward,” Anya announces, once everyone is gathered and the shit-talking Clarke has died down. “You all know the drill by now. There are three bags, and you have to get two of them back to your pedestal. Only one bag at a time, and no one is allowed to help you. If you want to get the bag away from your competitor, you have to earn it. The winners of the first round will go on to compete against each other for the prize.”

“What is the prize?” Ontari asks.

Anya smiles her usual tight smile, like she realizes that there is no “prize” in Bromans that’s actually good. “You’ll get to pick your boyfriend’s first opponent in the emperor’s games.”

Even by their admittedly low standards, it’s pretty uninspired, but that doesn’t matter to Clarke. Clarke doesn’t need a reason to be competitive, she goes cut-throat competitive at the drop of a hat.

He really does love her.

“The first round will be Clarke versus Ontari and Gaia versus Raven,” Anya adds. “Raven, we need to check your leg in the water first.”

Bellamy leans in close to Clarke as Raven tests her brace in the water. “You know this doesn’t matter, right?”

“I know.”

“I don’t care who I fight.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t really matter.”

“Ontari is kind of scary.”

She makes a face. “A little, I guess? Not that scary.”

“All I’m saying is that the stakes could not be lower here. So you should just have fun.”

“Winning is fun,” she says, and he puts his arm around her, kisses her hair.

“I guess it is.”

On the one hand, he’s not really expecting Clarke to throw the match or anything. He knows better than to think she won’t try. But he’s hoping she won’t do anything extreme, or come up with some weird new trick that finally gets her banished from the show. It would be a real anticlimax to lose like that.

And, in Clarke’s defense, she does absolutely nothing to bend the rules. She picks up only one bag, takes it to her pedestal, glances at Ontari, then back at the bags. In theory, she’s got this–most people who win the sprint win the whole game, but Ontari’s more athletic than than Clarke and definitely fights more.

“I really hope Ontari doesn’t try to drown her,” Raven murmurs.

“I wish she was up against you or Gaia,” Bellamy admits. “I’m pretty sure she and Ontari both take this way too seriously.”

“Are you kidding? I’m going to win this. If I go up against Clarke, I’m going to crush her.”

“Yeah, but not, like, murder her.”

“Not if I don’t have to.”

“You don’t think Clarke can outrun her?” Roan asks.

“I think we’re going to find out.”

Really, the big issue is that Bellamy doesn’t actually have to watch Clarke do this very often. She did challenges when he was in “jail,” but everything else has been assisting him or ridiculous. He never had to worry the way she did about injuries, even ridiculous, historically inaccurate Broman injuries.

All he wants is for it to be over soon, so, of course, it lasts forever.

Bellamy realizes almost immediately how bad it’s going to be. He catches Clarke’s expression when Ontari jumps her, the hard, stubborn set of her jaw, a clear sign that she will stay there forever if that’s what she has to do to win.

“Someone should start a timer,” he mutters.

“A timer?” asks Gaia.

“This is going to take a while.”

“How long can you fight over a sand bag?” Raven asks, and it’s not as if she’s going to jinx it, but she’s definitely underestimating how stubborn Clarke is. But understanding starts to dawn on her (and everybody else) after about five minutes, when they’ve barely moved and Bellamy has already settled in.

“You weren’t kidding,” Ilian says, slumping down next to him.

“Honestly, we should have brought a deck of cards. Unless Dax thinks Ontari’s going to give up on this.”

“They’re going to die in that pool,” Dax says. From anyone else, Bellamy would take it as deadpan humor, but he can’t tell that Dax has a sense of humor, so they really might die in there.

“Legally we have to step in before anyone dies,” says Anya. “So let me know if you think it’s getting close.”

“None of you are making me feel better,” Bellamy grumbles.

“She’s definitely not going to drown,” Raven says, patting him on the shoulder. “And she’s probably going to win. But she’ll wear herself out and then I’ll beat her with, like, zero effort. So this is perfect for me.”

“I might beat you,” Gaia puts in. “I mean, I probably won’t. But there’s always a chance.”

Raven smiles like a shark. “Yeah, anything’s possible.”

Bellamy stops asking for updates on how long it’s been at the twenty-minute mark, mostly because he thinks hearing it is worse than not hearing it. There’s a part of him that just wants to yell to Clarke it doesn’t matter, but Ontari could end this at any time too, and she’s not, so it’s not like it’s Clarke’s responsibility to do it either. He’s not going to tell her to quit when she could win.

Still, this is getting ridiculous.

“Honestly, I’m not going to just throw it in, but she probably deserves the win just for doing this,” Raven says, after what has been at minimum forty minutes and could be as long as five hours, at this point. Time has lost all meaning. If the sun sets, he won’t be surprised.

“Is there any way you can edit it to make this look like the finals?” Bellamy asks Anya.

She seems as hypnotized as all of them, for once, but her reflexes are as sharp as ever. “Raven would kill me, so, no.”

“I’m glad we’re all just assuming I’m going to win,” says Raven. “Not that I’m not, but glad I’ve got your support.” She starts. “Wait, head’s up, Clarke is doing something.”

Bellamy’s attention snaps back to the cesspit, but it’s already almost over. Clarke must have surged forward, taking advantage of how exhausted Ontari was, and she smacks the sandbag onto the pedestal with a resounding thunk.

“Clarke wins,” says Anya, and Bellamy jumps into the water without thinking, dragging himself over to where Clarke has collapsed on top of her hard-won prize.

“Jesus, you could have just lost,” he tells her when he reaches her, laughing a little in disbelief. He saw it coming, but somehow she still surprised him.

She raises her head for a tired smile, and he pulls her arm over his shoulders, half-dragging her out of the water.

“Have you met me?” she asks.

He gives her a quick kiss. “I have, yeah. That was amazing.”

“How long was it?”

“No idea.” He kisses her hair, relieved beyond words that this happened now, when he’s allowed to kiss her as much as he wants. Ridiculous, yes, but this is the girl he fell in love with. “You know you have to do another round, right?”

“Yeah. Raven’s going to kick my ass, I’m so done.”

Raven and Roan are at the edge of the cesspit to help her up, Raven grinning ear to ear. “Fuck, I didn’t know you wanted it that much,” she teases.

“Like you don’t,” Clarke shoots back. She still looks exhausted, but Bellamy feels better with her out of the water, and even better when one of the crew has a towel he can use to try to warm her up. “Are you okay?” he murmurs, hopefully quietly enough that no one can hear it. He doesn’t need this to make it on TV.

“Tired.”

“Yeah.” He wraps her up in his arms, reveling in the fact that he can, that she wants him to. He hopes he never gets used to itl he wants to always feel this lucky to be holding her. “That was really fucking cool.”

“All I did was stay still.”

“Trust me, it was cool.”

Raven and Gaia don’t take nearly as long, of course, which means Clarke has to go again almost immediately. Anya actually steps in and makes them wait, gives Clarke some gatorade and has one of the medics clear her before she goes in again.

“I’m still going to lose,” Clarke tells him.

“You already won.” He kisses her. “Give her hell.”

Roan flashes him a smile as Clarke and Raven get set up. “We’ve done very well for ourselves, haven’t we?”

It’s not the kind of sentiment Bellamy would have expected to be feeling on the set of Bromans, but here he is. His life is, against all odds, awesome.

“Yeah,” he tells Roan. “We really did.”

The feeling dies the next day, at the exact second Murphy says “fascinum.”

The morning had been going pretty well up until then. They’d had an early night because Clarke was still worn out from the match with Ontari, and while her reminder that they’ll be home again soon with a real life to figure out was a little stressful, he’s pretty sure they’ll be fine.

Mostly he’s ready to be done, and he figured the games would take most of the day. He wasn’t anticipating the dick-shaped bump in the road, but he probably should have been. Dick statues are too good for Bromans to pass on. If he hadn’t had so much going on, he probably would have been realized it was happening. He would have been disappointed if they didn’t do this.

As it is, though, he kind of wants to die.

“Huh,” says Murphy, looking Bellamy up and down like this is the Roman trivia he finally cares about. Which, to be fair, it probably is. Assuming he’s like every other guy Bellamy knows who’s ever studied Latin. “I wasn’t sure you were gonna have that one off the top of your head.”

Bellamy shrugs. “I took Latin in high school, that one was a big hit with everyone. Big reactions.”

“Cool. You can share with the rest of the class.”

“Seriously?” It feels like they shouldn’t be able to do this on TV. Bromans cannot possibly be airing on HBO. It would explain where they got their budget, but it’s not an HBO show.

His dick is not going to be on TV. There’s no way.

“It’s an important part of Roman culture,” Murphy says, straight-faced.

Clarke is frowning at him. “Spill.”

His sigh will probably be cut like a dramatic pause, but mostly he’s very tired. He would rather fight Roan in single combat again. “We’re making penis charms.”

Roan’s dick is out almost before he’s even finished, before Bellamy’s even sure everyone else knows what’s happening. “My time has come!”

That sounds about right.

The problem, of course, is that it’s only Roan’s time. Roan is ready for this and excited, while the rest of them are just stripping down in front of a the entire cast and crew so they can stick their dicks into some cold plaster.

“Should we be, like–into this?” Dax asks, sounding dubious.

“If this is a kink for you, don’t tell me,” says Murphy. “I already know way more about all your dicks than I want to. Especially Roan. If you just found out this does it for you, keep it to yourself.”

“No, I mean–”

“He’s a grower,” Ontari supplies. “Not a shower.”

“Is it too late to quit this show?” Bellamy murmurs to Clarke. “We could leave, right? Hitchhike back?”

“Think about the kind of person who would pick up a hitchhiker with a flower pot on his dick,” she says. “That’s the last person you want to get a ride from.”

“I was thinking I’d beat up Miller and take his clothes first.”

“Wow, you’ve really got this figured out,” says Miller, dry. “After everything I’ve done for you?”

“Which one of us has our dick in a flower pot?” Bellamy shoots back. “I don’t have friends anymore. Just a list of people I hate. And Clarke.”

“I should probably be on the people you hate this, I’m really enjoying this.”

He glares at her. “How?”

“It’s hilarious and I get to look at your dick. What’s not to like?”

It’s hard to maintain complete annoyance when Clarke is saying nice things about his dick, which she has touched and wants to continue touching in the future. That’s an upside.

“I’m with Murphy, if this is a kink for you I don’t want to know,” he tells her, and she kisses his shoulder.

“Cool, I won’t tell you.”

Raven wants more information about fascinum because of course she does, and that conversation carries them through the end of actual molding process. Which, of course, leaves the awkward removal part, and then the cleaning up which, in a porno, would definitely involve Clarke blowing him, or possibly him, Roan, Ilian and Dax having an orgy, depending on the porno and its genre.

In real life, though, everyone is paying too much to removing their own dick pots to pay much attention to what he’s doing, and they’ve all showered together enough that the nudity isn’t even really that novel anymore. Sometimes it feels like he’s more familiar with Roan’s dick than he is his own at this point, but it’s probably just because he doesn’t have nightmares about his own dick.

“What were you expecting when you came here?” he asks the man in question.

“Hm?”

“Did you think you were going to be washing plaster off your balls?”

Roan seems to be really thinking it over, which means he might have, at some point in his life, thought about washing plaster off his dick.

Well, it’s Bellamy’s own fault for asking.

“Not this exactly, but the broad experience is what I was looking for. But I don’t see why you decided to do it, honestly,” is what he finally says.

“The Roman stuff isn’t enough of a reason?”

“This is a far more accurate experience than I was expecting, and it’s still not particularly realistic,” Roan says, not unreasonably. “I don’t think you were really expecting an authentic Roman getaway.”

“No.”

“So, what were you expecting?”

The truth, of course, was that he was expecting to spend a few weeks hanging out with his best friend and favorite person, and he’d be going slowly insane from fake PDA. It hadn’t been related to Bromans, specifically, which he had figured would be–

Kind of exactly what he got. Absurd and historically inaccurate and full of challenges he didn’t want to do and weird shit he and Clarke could laugh about later. If anything, it’s been better than he expected, even leaving aside the fact that Clarke’s actually in love with him too. He’s made friends and had fun and he may never live this down, but he could actually win, which is the best possible way to never live something down. He’s within spitting distance of being the best Broman, and if he’s not, there won’t be any shame in losing to Roan.

“Not sure,” he says, and smiles. “Nothing nearly this good.”

Roan grins and claps him on the shoulder. “That’s what I thought. Now, shall we go get our penis statues?”

Bellamy rolls his eyes. “We better, yeah.”

Only in Brome.

#todayisthesortofday

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