#I WAS ALMOST FORGETTING ABOUT THIS HELP

[ccaptain]

For H:SR Kaeya to forever solidify a bond and come to terms with the turmoil in his life that circles around his identity, two things can happen:

- Once it's revealed that his previous name no longer has meanings nor importance, he allows the person to give him a name. Not just a name- an identity to have that's shared only between them. He's not Kaeya Alberich, nor his own person: he's walking a weird line between the two, and must be pulled to a side for him to finally be comfortable and for his inner turmoil to settle. Kaeya allowing his partner to name them is a tender moment- expecially if they use names from their native language, that they have thought about, a name that gives a meaning to reflect his entire personality and mannerism. They will be the founders of his new identity, a name to call tenderly with pride of having given it to him, or when they're in trouble; and, no matter what, he will appear to their side, to their aid- eternally grateful, and with a name to use that bonds them irreversibly. The only problem is that, once the one that named him dies, so does the sweet, shared secret of the identity. Nobody will ever call him that special name again. - Dramatic, irreversible changes are applied to his appearence either directly or indirectly by someone. If you're thinking about that Tangled scene where Eugene slices off Rapunzel's hair, or Akane Tendo's long hair being accidentally cut off by Ryoga... yeah, this is pretty much what I had in mind too. Not only that- but anything that alters his body for a long period of time can be applied here too: a wound, or a scar somebody manages to land on him and make it stick to a body that attempts to self-repair. Even if not with romantic intent, once a person manages to alter his appearence, they become both the bearer and the witnesses of a change- they modify his looks, accidentally or forcefully impose themselves on him and destroy the barrier that enthrances him to resemble Kaeya Alberich. They have permanently altered him, no matter if romantic or antagonistic. Leaving a sign on a borrowed body shocks him out of the identity he's carrying- Kaeya Alberich never had that scar or that wound before. Kaeya Alberich never bore the possible mark a stubborn lover keeps doing and doing time and time again in that place- therefore, he's no longer Kaeya Alberich. It works- it's a less sweet method and a more twisted one that's way less tender, under some cases, but it works just as well.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Happy Valentine's Day! (and this blog's first post anniversary!)

[s0fter-sin]

rewatching s1 and in ep2 w*ndigo, dean makes a joke about not bringing provisions into the woods just to pull out a bag of peanut butter m&m’s and stick with me here, it’s why the later seasons’ ��goofy dean” loses me

this moment is clearly a joke but if you think about it too much, it also makes some sense; a family size bag of peanut m&m’s is calorie dense and even the high sugar is good to keep you moving which they need on an overnight hunt. it also shows how due to their upbringing, they’ve had to eat lower quality food, things they always had access to that was cheap and also in bulk

what does dean eating ghost pepper jerky then tipping water on himself exist for other than to be a cringy joke? what does smelling old chinese food, testing to see if it's still good then shaking his head with cabbage hanging out his mouth when it isn't serve? it's just to make him look stupid and contrast sam's healthy/clean diet (and superiority but that’s another conversation) which has always existed but it used to be nuanced and natural

we see dean as a child give up the food he wanted to eat so sam could eat it. (“i’m sick of spaghetti-os,” “you’re the one who wanted them,” … “i want lucky charms!” “… there’s only enough for one bowl and i haven’t had any yet!” proceeds to give them to sam, 1x18) we know he hustled and stole food to ensure sam ate. (“so, what’d he take?” “get this- peanut butter and bread.” 9x07)

we also see throughout the early seasons dean teasing sam about his salad or healthy choice while he eats some form of burger or other fast food (or notably, cheerfully eating prison food that sam won’t touch, 2x19). it's typical sibling teasing but it also shows that it isn't new for sam to eat like that and for dean to know he eats like that

sam being picky isn't just a character trait they chose for him, it's a result of how dean raised him; he raised him to like and want healthy food and be food secure enough to reject food he didn't want

but dean eats anything he is given and seeks out unhealthy - cheap, plentiful, filling - food

he is the opposite of picky to the point of it being a consistent bit; they show him multiple times eating when it's socially frowned upon to do so eg. questioning a grieving victim when they're trying to be discreet (1x14, 2x15, 2x18)

a similar moment to the chinese food is in 4x19; dean wakes up in the car while sam brushes his teeth outside and is hungry. sam says there's a sandwich in the backseat, dean smells it and recoils bc it's an old tuna sandwich. the moment is funny on its own but it also exists as a comparison of their lives to adam's; he has a loving mother, goes to school and importantly, a steady stable childhood

it’s a joke with a purpose

it also supports dean's food insecurity; he wakes up and is immediately hungry, enough to complain about it and seek out food before anything else

dean is always hungry bc he never has access to nutritionally rich foods bc he got used to using the money he earned to buy sam's more expensive food. he got used to his cheaper, denser foods and grew up with (and continues to live with) intermittent access to said foods. think of how long it takes to drive from one state to another; how many hours it can take to see another town that offers food, if you arrive at a reasonable enough time for anything to be open. also think how they can’t keep any food beyond what fits in an esky; nothing that needs defrosting, nothing can be heated up. it’s bags and jars and take out for as long as they can trust it

then they get the bunker which has its own kitchen

dean even describes himself as "nesting" when he decorates his room, something he hasn't had since he was four years old, and he uses said kitchen to cook a burger from scratch that he is proud of. he is food secure for the first time in his life and it shows in how often he cooks for both himself and sam

so these moments where they have him acting goofy regarding food are no longer character driven and only exist as a joke which is why they come across as cringy and out of character compared to similar earlier moments

a lot of my issues with dean's characterisation started when they introduced the bunker. the argument can and is made that the reason these jokes happen is bc he feels safe in the bunker, that bc he now has a home he can relax and unmask but that still doesn't feel sufficient. they crank up these sillier moments for both of them, giving them a sort of playing house comedy vibe of two roommates with completely different personalities but it doesn't feel like an authentic progression. it feels forced; an attempt at humour for humour's sake

food stopped being an informed part of their characters and their trauma and instead became flanderised; sam is the judgy vegetarian health nut and dean is his borderline slovenly carnivore counterpart

[canyoureallycallthisablog]

I'm love ttyd so of course I was gonna make art when I heard the news

[moe-broey]

Close ups on the pocket details!!! I'm SUPER happy w how the top pockets look 😳😳😳

I think the variety of pride pins with the moral panic button/Mr Faggot beadwork just. Really sells it. Shadow the Hedgehog voice Pee Your Pants. If you're going to be a shithead about me I'm going to be really annoying and do a bit about it. Plus the little golden angel pin... ALSO really pulls the whole thing together. "God help you" Right in front of my guardian angel? Really? 😒And how could I not make mention of. The Skull. I love you The Skull. It's a button (not sewn on yet, pinned) that I filled the details in w nail polish. Oh yeah! Besides the bottle cap pins (acrylics sealed with mod podge and a prayer), the biggest addition there is the chain lining the pocket flap! I think it looks SO SLICK

The pansy was gonna go on the queer side, but then I got the boutonniere idea! And I think it looks nice! Kinda adds to the asymmetry of the floral print/plaid blocking. And... of course.... I have... my friends...... 🥺 Biggest additions here are the glow-star pentagram pin, soda tabs and the heart locket!

I don't really have many new additions to the bottom pockets. Not yet! The only thing I did was stitch one side of the handcuff chain, and rearrange the pins holding up the other side. The cuffs/scorpion was just an impulse addition before going to a concert. But I do like it! And it looks even better now! Meanwhile, that other pocket, I actually have no idea what I'll do. Sakura is just there cause she matches really well, esp w the angel pin actually!

[edwinisms]

see I need ghost clothes to have properties more or less like regular clothes because wearing someone else’s jacket or shirt is one of the most important expressions of affection in existence and yes basically what I’m saying is i wanna see charles give edwin his jacket for one reason or another and see edwin get all flustered and giddy about it

[shannonsketches]

Z-Crew in a competitive escape room scenario in which they have to use teams but Vegeta and Bulma are not allowed to team up for several reasons so they both immediately call dibs on Gohan but he teams up with Piccolo while they’re arguing over who gets him so Geets volunteers Goku to Bulma’s team and picks up Krillin and runs away before she can say no

[xxplastic-cubexx]

still thinking of my fave marvel rivals interaction where my jeff and i were hanging on the point after knocking out the other team and lil bro sprays the space in front of me and emotes and we both said thank you at the same time like i fear im never forgetting that ever

[lesbiangiratina]

I dreamt about space aliens that had no sexual organs so they couldnt get off and were in pain all the time because of it so they tortured humans. To feel better i guess. Idk

[in-tua-deep]

So I followed you years ago for the first season of tua. It has been years and now tua has come to an end. I just watched the final season. Did you or will you watch it? I might not be able to recommend it. Which is such a shame. The first season was amazing and will be forever one of my favorite shows.

I have a terrible confession to make…

I’ve only fully watched season one of the umbrella academy. I started season 2 and haven’t finished it yet 😭

[fenharel-babe]

ANOTHER QUESTION TO THE FANDOM IM SO SORRY:

Solas’s outfit. What are the green things he wears?? Stockings?? Leggings?? Pants??? I’m talking about the beige sweater with the wolf jaw necklace. His like casual outfit, you know???

I’m writing a different fic, literally so sad and in character depth for my lavellan, and I have to describe his outfit and I am STRUGGLING.

[frootbyethefoot]

actually sick to my stomach i love half life so much

[orcelito]

Wild that anytime I post an update a lot of people read it and are even excited about it and have their own thoughts and reactions to it that I'll never know.

Comments are only the very tip of the iceberg with it. And I am Very grateful to commenters for letting me in on it. But in the same way that I'll be excited with my friends when a fic we love updates, it's likely that Other people enthuse with Their friends when my fic updates. And it's just so strange. An experience I'll never have access to.

Everyone's relationship with my fic is unique. So many different people with so many different circumstances and preferences... and the number of people that have told me that my fic is one of their favorites, some even saying it's their Favorite favorite... every single one of them have their own relationship with my writing.

It's just interesting to me. I think and think and think on my writing. I have my plans for basically the entire fic, the way I want it to end already thought out, all the major plot beats and the relationship progressions, All of that thought out. I love my writing so very much, but I'm on the inside looking out. This is my mechanical horse, and I'm in here laying out the groundwork and pulling levers and constructing limbs, puttering away making the horse move. Forever and always, my relationship with it will be more intimate than anyone's, and yet more clinical. Because I know it better than the back of my own hand, but I'll never have the experience of reading it fresh. Of reading it without knowing everything that's going to happen from now to the end and beyond. I won't have the thrill of the plot twists I have planned, the delight at seeing things progress, the horror at seeing things go wrong...

This is my mechanical horse, and I'm making it move.

I just always wonder what it must be like to see it from the outside. I hope to others that it's a pretty horse.

[keeps-ache]

think this is funny. anyway. the Thoughts are back at it again

[umemiyan]

man one summer i had to sleep on my mom’s couch in the little apartment because there was no bed/room for me…. god i’m so appreciative of my new mattress LOL

[outlying-hyppocrate]

sometimes i think about killing myself just so my family will be free of the burden that is me and finally leave the country.