#I WANT JT TO BE OVER!!!
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Me, eating glass: only one more week
#cookie speaks#GODDDD#I WANT JT TO BE OVER!!!#tests tomorrow#two clinicals#one paper#it’s doable#then I get my break#sigh#I’m getting TWO massages
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Maple Leafs discourse on their team social medias makes me lose brain cells because wdym they're first in their division and coming off a 5 game win streak & people are commenting that the top players are only in it for the money and have no drive, that particular players are useless and need to be traded asap, that they're a garbage team, that they'll never make it past the first round just because they lost one game.
Apparently because they are being payed handsomely the players must be mindless automatons who perform perfectly every night. It drives me absolutely nuts how quickly alleged fans will completely turn on their own team.
#i cannot understand how some people can't seem to comprehend that the players are still human who will have off days and make mistakes#regardless of their work ethic or drive or passion#it's not actual critiquing either it's basically just grown men cyberbullying other grown men#over a GAME#& they have a ton of people in the organization to critique and help them improve! have you ever heard of a coach!#it's like people want to assume the worst so when the leafs perform badly in the playoffs they aren't upset about it bc they see it coming#but they clearly are upset about it because they're commenting on the leafs own social media pages#& these losers never seem to realize how their own behaviour does actively make it harder for the players to perform#maybe some players will not want to play in Toronto because the pressure is so insane & the fanbase can be so toxic!#it really just is bullying#& those people think it's completely fine & warranted because they don't know the players personally & they're famous & rich#maybe try basic human decency for a change? & not letting yourself get super angry about a game?#& just the bad faith element of it all...#it makes it not fun! this is supposed to be entertainment!#stop assuming the worst#some of these people even assume the worst when things are going well! wdym jt is only playing well bc he knows his contract is almost up#isn't it more interesting & inspiring that someone legitimately improved through hard work & the power of the amulet#to the benefit of your team#let's bring back being a fan of your own team ok?#we are basically already doing that with the lb#(affectionate)#thank god for us!#toronto maple leafs#tml#leafs lb#my thoughts
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THE ACCURSED BREAKING-WHEEL TURNS YET ANOTHER SPOKE
#my art#my ocs#zwei#dms (dark macadamia switch)#dalton.txt#seabrrd.png#TEEHEE ignore that i had to mark over my signature bc thjs js for something irl#probably a bit overrendered but i dont care anymore#have had this pose/general concept in my head for months and am finally able to execute jt AND it gets printed? fuck yeah#bajillion easter eggs that most people who see the print wont pick up on which is really fun#also wanted to make it ambiguous whether shes being crushed by the wheel or is about to bring it down on someone. anyway#🛞🛞🛞🛞🛞🛞🛞
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I think regardless of the situation red would be really stressed out by being given gifts if he's expected to open and react to them in front of others. He has the flat affect of all time and the added stress of knowing people want him to react a certain way just makes it worse.
Many ppl without flat affect already struggle to seem excited enough about things they're given but for someone like red who doesn't really outwardly react to most things it's truly dreadful. He can't stand the entire interaction of being expected to react a certain way knowing people will and often do see him as rude when he doesn't.
The only people he doesn't feel horrifically stressed about this around are like. His mom and green and leaf. Because they are familiar enough with him and know what kind of things he likes and don't make him feel so pressured to behave a certain way.
I think there would be some other ppl who sort of understand and try not to make him feel pressed about these things but red is a bit reclusive by nature so even then he can only feel totally comfortable around a few people. He sees and appreciates the effort unfortunately this is just his cross to bear.
#the johtrio assumedly come to understand red and try to be supportive but i think the first time one of them gave him something#and he had 0 reaction they started panicking a bit like “sorry do you not like it? i can get you smth else ? sorry :(”#and now red is permanervous about it especially since theyre a few years younger than kantrio ik id feel bad#if ppl younger than me who idolized me and wanted to show their appreciation to me ended up dissapointed and sad over my reaction#hell still accept things it just makes him uncomfortable and he awkwardly says/signs Thank You while looking/feeling like this 😐😥#whenever red is super uncomfortable in situations like this he either inwardly wishes green was here to make jt less awkward#or green Is there to help make it less awkward#red is capable of socializing without green or leaf around. it makes him uncomfortable but as an adult he has the Ability#he just lowkey doesnt want to. hes happy with his 2 friends and the handful of younger trainers hes mostly grown used to having around#its 4am if i made any typos or worded smyh wrong...thats for morning ethan yo fjx#pokemon headcanons#trainer red#green oak#blue oak#leaf mentioned
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乐游原 | Wonderland to Love ° Liu Yuning as Mu Xianhe, E36-37
#乐游原#Wonderland of Love#cdrama#Liu Yuning#character: mu xianhe#just a reclusive magician who happens to be a big foodie#i didnt gif the magic part bc it was too cheesy for me#meowmao gifs#jing tian and a producer jiejie skipped over to visit lyn on the zichuan set#and while jt got to meet her idol and snap a pic#tht jiejie asked him if he wanted to cameo xD
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hows my favorite lesbian celebrity?
TERRIBLE !!!!! my bdiy has been aching eberdya for some reason i am so in pain !!! to fistrcat myself from the pain i have started playing the piano again after teaching myself for about a week a few years ago .. i wsnt 5o rlesrn all of beitney spears somgs on piano thts my only goal
#yoire all LUCKY i am drawing art ... (i am doing this because i enjoy it and it makes me happy)#you should all be THANKING me for doing this everday .. (i choose to draw rveryday because i enjoy it and it makes me happy)#i want to buy a drum set and learn the drums but rhey are so exoensive#ehat do you MEAN jts over £200 ??? for a goos drum kit ??#im POOR !!!
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completing the 2.2 trailblaze mission gives you new daily text messages from aventurine if you have him.. 🥹 so you're Not just left with his scheduled post-suicide-attempt farewells. and it's a really nice conversation too. he plays it off like a game buuuut he loses on purpose every time so really he's just opening up of his own volition
(i'm still alive, and i'm happy about that 🥹 his conversation with acheron really left a profound impact on him oh my godddd)





aventurine... of all people... reaching out and talking so honestly about what happened and how it affected him... and seeing a therapist of sorts (bit of an oversimplification but that's basically what the doctors of chaos do so like). sometimes all you need to start learning how to value your life again is to uhh ..literally get cut in half
#ALSO! MY AVENTURINE STELLE FRIENDSHIPISMS#they're real.#he trusts her quite a lot it would seem huh. despite everything#they have a chance to be friends for realsies now and he seems to actively want that and that makes me so happy#go dumpster diving with her kakavasha. you'll have fun#honkai star rail spoilers#I'M SO GLSD HE'S BACK FOR REAL BTW#i got so excited when i saw him in the fake-out and then he started talking about the ipc's deal and i was like ?#and realized jt wasn't real. and i was miserable#BUT THEN HE'S ACTUALLY FOR REAL BACK 🥹#thank you argenti (??????? god i wish that hadn't been off screen. i bet they had the funniest dynamic in the world)#i think once he and boothill get talking they'll get along. boothill's a pretty amenable guy even though he likes to say hello with his Gun#so that'll be fine#they have a lot in common after all. in terms of the ipc fucking them over forever#i wonder if there will be any other texts from aventurine... guess i'll find out in like 40 minutes when the day refreshes
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why can i literally not function at school like i swear i'm trying i just can't focus????
#luc posts#like i take notes but then i get bored and the doodle on the side of my page thst was meant to take 5 seconds took 10 minutes :(#and then im lost and bc im lost i get all fidgety and i keep doodling and then jts just a cycle#if i work for 20 minutes i feel like ive ran a marathon and i have to take a 40 minutes drawing/staring into the distance break#and im gonna fail maths but theres literally nothing i can do no matter what i do I can't focus for over 20 minutes at a time#and then its the end of class and i feel guilty bc oh i didnt do any work :( like i feel bad and i want to fix it but idk whats wrong so ho#can i fix it if i dont know whats wrong with meeeee#ugh#it literally makes me want to cry am i just lazy is that what it is am i literally useless why cant i work#like i was so ahead kf the average grades and i never learnt to study and now ugh i dont know how to function so i just dont#and it doesn't help that my friends are all geniuses#like they complain about their one mark away from full marks and im just like OH MY GOD if i could just focus then i coukd do so well#likr ok i guess i wont mention tjst i failed that test bc yall sre complaining about getting one mark off fukl makrs#likr fuckkkk okay i have so mucb potential why di i waste jt :(((((#i hate school so mucb#i genuinely consider dropping out sometimes like I CANT DO THIS hiw do these peiole di ut how hiw how someone tell me how to function#like these peiole getting top marks withiut eben truijgn and i tyr and i cant fishcis so i fail snd then ufh i want to die#bc its so embarassing i eas like top 10% of the class a few years ago and now i just cant function like how do these peiple do itso#someone explain ot me how oieolem focus and dony get distracted and ginish things kike ugh
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Shrimprat zine teaser <3
#blaseball#Rat Love#Shrimp Chocolate#Hades Tigers#Blaseball zine jam#ohohohohohoo you thought I was only going to make a JT zine???#this chocoholic zine is very vague and incoherent. I don't care look at them they're so cute#I'll link both zines on tumblr when the jam is over but I wanted to put this piece here on its own too <3 <3#you don't need to know anything about blaseball to enjoy looking at these cute girlies <3 <3 <3#art
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hesd in paws
#♡.gabi barks#forgort i poured myselg a drink earlier#didnt drink it bcs. Forgot#my brother reminded me of it. canr let it go tonwaste…#i was gna sleep but. i chuggwd jt#just wanted to get it over with 😭😭😭😭😭😭 LOL#i am. Fucked up#inebriatwd gabi is just. needyclingy gabi and brsinrot is like a milkion times worse#i want. my wife (jake#iral fixation bad too. i deserve fingers in mouf n i think jaknwould indulge me#now thinking jakehands#thinkr he would pressdown on yr tongue and jus. toy with ur mouth#rubshis soit cocered fingers over ur lips.. opensyour mouth wider so he can spit in it#ok thjs turned into spit thinkinf i awnt spit in mouf#want#heas in PAWS#**** ******#sorry#m normal#Thinking. Resding. i heart p[GUNSHORS]
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11/3/24 worthms
#jt#im doing better than i was when i made this i suppose#this year was really bad for me mentally#i don't want to define a whole year like this but its undoubtedly true#also like over 60% of my ms paint poetry vent whatever bullshit#is me crying about one person who doesn't care about me#i should have realized earlier u would think#ms paint
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honest to god this is about to be what's going to happennext tuesday for my art instructor. sorry you aren't getting shit from me
#still pissed qbout her giving us the actual rundown of the project tuesday and telling us we had the entire#break for thanksgiving to start working on it despite the fact that you aren't supposed to give work over break apparently#and now making it due on tuesday. honestly. as long as I have a D in the class it's fine#I need to make pieces for my portfolio but it's the fact that she thinks the class is being lazy when she literally is giving us next to#nothing in regards kf time to work on our FINAL PROJECTS. and she wants them to be great#sorry ma'am I have a small word or two to say on your course evaluation#and it's also the fact that she's a student as well. not a professor. SHE SHOULD UNDERSTAND ATLEAST SOME NO????#not to mention all of her assignments are extremely vague. like yes jts an art class but#when you write about the stuff you want to see you shouldn't make it sound like a riddle#im just so mad sorry
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I often think abt this mutual I used 2 have and o the thing in The Office where they stare @ the camera
#Bouta rant abt them so if they don’t care keep scrolling☝️#But they just weren’t fun 2 text after a while and we’re both became so dependent of each other#I realized it wasn’t very normal and spaced myself a bit but they just got kinda desperate and I felt bad#But then it got kinda creepy#Like once they asked if I wanted 2 see them do inappropriate acts 2 themselves over a Discord call#Despite the fact that I am a guy in a happy relationship and they were a lesbian#So I just started to get uncomfortable#Then we just stopped talking one day#And I soft blocked them I cannot go through that again#I still get sick thinking abt jt#Victor Speaks#Vent
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i think everything and everyone is conspiring to keep me from trying to stop being a hermit
#julia.txt#i was ljke omg midterms over i can Go Places noe#turns out. i cant even go to the gym. because of insurance problems like there was a mixup with the papers#and my dad doesnt want me taking the car until its fixed 😭😭#and i cant ask my parents to drive me bc theyre busy and i cant take the bus bc it would take me like an hour to get there hashtag suburbs#okay but this whole insurance thing is so. explodes#like apparently since both my parents work from home (my mom only goes to work jn person once a week)#and i go to work Twice a week#if my dad updates the insurance now and tells them i use jt to go to work twice a week#then id become the primary driver EVEN IF I DONT USE THE CAR THAT MUCH#but its only work that counts. and if i become the primary driver then our insurance fees double bc im younger 🔥🔥🔥#love it here forever
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btw these are all the people I had enough pictures of him with that I felt justified making an album so if u ever have specific requests I WILL post whatever theme u want with whoever you want
#love how this ranges from like. 9 w JT (wanted to store them in an album bc some of them are funny to me)#vs. over 200 with becks (theyre insane)#had a seperate folder for giggsy bc some of the photos i like gary in them but giggsys face is just so punchable i HATE him
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brothers I am stacked with work but I can't for the life of me do any of it. I just had to look for pictures on pinterest but I gave up and fell asleep 🥲
#the solution would be to skip school but I end up just not doing anything even then#I literally feel paralysed lateky#my mind wants to do everything#instead I just lay in bed and scroll social media#but its gotten to a point where i come on tumblr and i just scroll the same posts over and over bc it doesnt even matter what im looking at#i just dont wwnt to think or feel anything and if my hands are occupied my mind is too#and my mind is just so busy lately i find it hard to listen to music too#i keep on restarting the songs bc i constantly zone out#but i keep on zoning out xd#its no good#I love bttt#but i feel like the fantasy wolrd i created around them is crumbling slowly and im being faced w. reality and idk what to do#i want to stay happy with my bros and i will but#ye whatever i will#i just need to fix myself a bit#but idk how to bc skipping school doesnt help going to school makes jt worse#whatever i just go to sleep🥰#or ill stay awake and watch some bt tours#and then ill do this task in the morning#procrastinating pissing rn brb
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