#I REALLY WANTED TO MAKE THIS A SMUT but i can't
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DILF | older!harry
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Summary: Y/n meets an older man at a bar and she's not taking no for an answer. Harry likes her persistence.
A/N: This was requested + this! Also, please think before you judge Y/n. She is very bold and confident in this. Maybe even a little pushy but Harry likes it (even if at first he doesn't give that impression). Also he's single so this isn't cheatrry!
Word Count: 6,580
Warning: age gap, smut, alcohol consumption (light)
. .
"That one. Total dilf. He looks grumpy. Bet you can't crack him."
Y/n laughed at her friend and looked down at her red-painted nails before narrowing her gaze on the attractive older man who was seated at the corner of the bar alone. He was nursing a whisky and he did look rather sullen. Unapproachable even.
"Why him?"
"Because he's hot. And I'm curious to see if you can get him to smile at least," Warren raised her brows, "I dare you."
Y/n tilted her head and assessed him. He was nice and big, taking up a decent amount of space at the bar, broad shoulders and back hunched as he leaned his muscular forearms on the wood of the bar top. Meaty hands placed on either side of his lowball glass. Thick brown waves on top of his head with a bit of silver coming in at the temples. But the handsome features on his face really set him apart. His granite jawline gave way to stubble that stretched over his skin and shaded in the spaces around his pink lips.
If she could "crack" him she wasn't sure she'd want just a smile. He looked yummy enough to eat.
Drinking down the last of her martini she pointed at Warren and then Tara, "Fine. Give me twenty minutes and I'll have him eating from the palm of my hand."
Tara laughed, "If you say soâŠ"
She placed her heeled feet down on the floor and brushed her hands over her dress, "Oh, I do say so. Just watch and learn, ladies."
Y/n wasn't quite that confident, but she wasn't about to say no to dare. And she could hold her own when it came to flirting. She liked getting a little attention and if she could garner this one's interest it might be fun.
She sauntered up to the bar behind the man and noticed the way his t-shirt stretched over his lats and tapered loosely down at his waist. The guy was fit. And lucky her, there was an open stool next to him.
Sliding onto the seat she waved at the bartender to order another drink. She'd need all the courage she could get, in whatever form she could get it.
Tapping her long nails on the lacquered wood she felt nerves thrumming through veins before turning toward the man finally. He hadn't seemed to take note of her yet, which honestly was unusual in most cases. Maybe she thought too highly of herself but men tended to notice her right away. She appreciated the challenge, though.
Reaching her hand into his space to greet him, she pushed down her nerves to sound steady as she spoke, "I'm Y/n."
She watched his brow furrow as he turned to look at her hand and then up at her eyes, his expression, which she expected would soften once he looked at her, was unamused. A single light overhead lit the tops of their heads as a shadow cast over the side of his face and he didn't make a move to shake her hand, "And I'm old enough to be your dad."
A surprised scoff fell from her lips as she moved her hand away from him. She wiggled in her seat and crossed her leg over her thigh toward him, gulping down the initial rejection with as much grace as she could muster, "I think you're jumping to conclusions about my intentions. But so what if you're older than me? I don't mind. We're both adults, right?"
An unimpressed grunt rumbled from his throat before he took another sip of his whisky and he looked away from her toward the TV that hung not far away from where they sat.
The bartender placed her olive martini down on the bar in front of her, "It'll be on Y/n Y/l/n. I already have an open tab."
A sip of the salty drink felt warm down her throat. So he was going to be a bit tough to crack. She turned to look at her friends who were grinning in her direction.
Straightening her back to feel more confident she tried again, "So you're not gonna tell me your name even?"
Without looking at her, he licked his lips and ticked his jaw, "Y/n, I think it's past your bedtime."
She smiled at that. He'd said her name, which meant he'd been listening, "My bedtime is whenever I say it is, not when some grouchy stranger says."
He puffed out an amused laugh through his nose, "I am a stranger. Which means you should be cautious, little girl. Your dad didn't teach you about things like that?" He turned to look down at her again, and that time she saw the soft green color of his eyes as the light hit his face just right.
But now she was really determined. She smiled brightly at him and let her eyes coast over his tattooed arm and then back up to his face, "Are you telling me you're dangerous?"
He still didn't smile as he shook his head like he was surprised by her gall, "Do your parents know what you're up to tonight?"
"I'm 24. Graduated from college, live on my own, pay my bills, have a full-time job. You seem to be awfully worried about my parents. I can take care of myself just fine."
Just then another person sat down next to the man Y/n was trying to whittle away at. He poked his elbow at him, "Who's this?"
"Don't know. Someone who's about to go back to her table with her little girlfriends."
Biting her lip she traced the rim of her martini glass with her fingertip, keeping her eyes set on the handsome tattooed one, "Not even a smile. Just one? Please?"
"Like I already said, I'm way too old for you."
The other man leaned over and reached to tap Y/n's shoulder, "Hey. Forget about Harry, here. You can bring me home with you if you're looking for a daddy tonight."
She frowned and looked him up and down to asses. He was late 40s perhaps, wearing a local band t-shirt, ripped jeans, and a backward cap to make himself appear a little more youthful. "No thanks. You'd know if I was interested in you."
Harry bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself from smiling at her retort. She was definitely too young but he liked her spunk.
"Now, HarryâŠ" she said his name slowly as she leaned a little closer, "I've got your name thanks to your friend. Can I have a smile?"
"Why?" He stared down at her, the caress of his gaze felt infinite and she found her skin convecting in its wake. He might be hard to crack but this one would be worth it, she determined.
She sighed and slid her finger dangerously close to his wrist as he looked down at her nail and watched her trail it near his arm, "I just hoped to see you smile is all. Too handsome to have such a sour scowl on your face."
"And you're hardly old enough to be so confident to walk up to a strange man at a bar."
She laughed and tilted her head, "You planning on doing something bad to me, Harry?"
And that. That pulled a reaction out of him that spread over his features slowly as he shook his head in disbelief, "Darlin', you wouldn't be able to handle me."
Her eyes widened slightly. Now she was definitely not giving up. Y/n wasn't one to fail and Harry might be making her work hard for it but she couldn't imagine it wouldn't be worth it in the end.
"Is that a challenge or something?" She softly scraped her nail over his tattooed wrist and Harry watched her red nail work over his skin.
His resolve was fading fast. She could tell he wasn't going to keep denying her. And why should he? If he was single, which he appeared to be, what was the harm in having a little fun with someone younger? Y/n didn't mind. And he certainly shouldn't either.
"If it were a challenge you'd know it. Lots of other guys here, Y/n. Go enjoy your night with someone closer to your own age."
She sighed in annoyance. But he hadn't moved his arm away from her and she was going to take that as a sign.
Dragging the toe of her shoe into his shin she grinned, "I don't want to enjoy my night with someone my own age. Not tonight anyway. I think you've convinced me that I need to test out this theory of yours. That you think I can't handle you. Cause I bet I can."
With his eyes piercing into hers, he took another sip of his drink. She thought she might have just convinced him to give her a smile at the very least because it looked like he was weighing his options. And if she could get him to smile she might have luck with the rest.
He tilted his chin upward for a moment, eyes aimed at the ceiling like he was calling on a higher power for strength, "Go back to your friends, Y/n. Any other man here would love to have your company."
"But you wouldn't love to have my company?"
"I mean⊠I'm still here," the other man raised his hand and leaned into Harry, "Honey we could have so much fun. Any man who'd turn you down is either battin' for the other team or more likely," he chuckled and pushed his shoulder into Harry's teasingly, "He can't get it up anymore."
Y/n's mouth dropped open at that and Harry turned to look at the man. She wished she could see the look on his face, "Sit the fuck back down, John. She already told you she's not interested in you."
"Yeah, and you're not interested in her so what's it matter to you? Look at her, Harry. Practically begging you. Young and bubbly⊠Tightâ"
Harry's hand covered John's throat as he pushed him away, nearly making his stool topple over, "Get the fuck outta here. You had too much whisky tonight."
"Aww⊠come on Harry⊠I was just jokin'!"
She watched as he stood from his stool and looked down at John, "And you thought that was funny? You like making jokes about women like that?"
The man put his hands up in surrender, "I'm out. HereâŠ" he threw a wad of cash on the bar top before he moved past Harry and then looked at Y/n, "My apologies if I offended you."
They watched as John left the bar quickly and then Harry sat back down before he waved at the bartender and signaled for the check, "Just the one whisky neat."
"You're leaving already? Night's still young, Harry."
He sucked at his teeth as he scraped his gaze over her face and down to her cleavage. She smiled when she watched the path his eyes had taken.
The bartender handed him the bill and Harry leaned over to pull his wallet from his back pocket.
She scooted closer to him, "You headed home?"
He nodded, but not necessarily in answer to her question, it was more of an appraisal kind of nod. He was still silent as he pulled cash out of his wallet.
"Thanks for that, by the way. I'm sure John's a nice guy and all but he's not really my type. And I'm sure he was wrong about you."
That got his attention. Harry flicked his gaze back to hers, "Wrong about me?"
She smiled, "The part where he said you couldn't get it up. You're not that old. I'm sure you still can. Right?"
He clenched his jaw and breathed out of his nostrils like he couldn't believe she'd asked him such a thing. He handed the bartender his cash with a nod before he stood up from his stool.
"Huh. Since you're so quiet about it maybe he was right," she goaded, pressing her lips together to flatten her smile as she looked up at him through her lashes.
Harry placed a palm down on the bar top next to her hand and leaned over her, "You're out of your depth here, Y/n."
"Now, you don't really know that do you? Just because I'm younger than you doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing."
"You're awfully pushy. Not used to hearing no, are you?"
Y/n watched as the edge of his mouth lifted in amusement and she widened her eyes and pointed, "You're almost smiling."
He shook his head and looked around the bar before pinning his gaze back to hers, "I hope you enjoy the rest of your night. But your luck has run out with me, princess."
Harry stood to his full height and Y/n decided to try one last time, "So it's true then. What he said."
He stopped and turned to look back at her, a slow burning heat behind his gaze, "Couldn't be further from the truth."
She smiled and slid off her stool to stand in front of him. His height was impressive, "Prove it."
The line of his jaw hardened, turning his cheekbones into slashes of tension. His eyes simmered as he weighed his options. Finally, a hint of a smile stretched over his mouth. A small one, but still.
"I don't need to prove anything to silly little girls."
"Good thing I'm not a silly little girl. I'm a grown woman, Harry."
Y/n knew she was pushing it. She'd never needed to throw herself at any man before. But because of that, she wasn't used to rejection either. Maybe it was a good lesson for her ego. She knew her big fault was how entitled she could act sometimes. But that was partly thanks to how she was raised. It's better to act like a man to get what you want in life, her dad told her. And so far, that had been true. Some women balked at her confidence and her bold attitude. She wasn't demure or sweet enough. And men would often refer to her as a bitch or say that she was trying too hard.
She'd work on her ego another time. But right now? She was focused on winning this battle.
"What do you want with someone like me anyway? Hm? I'm old, Y/n. What's in it for you?"
Blinking her eyes she shook her head, "You're not old, first of all. Secondly, you're really attractive. It doesn't need to go much deeper than that, does it? I just think you're handsome. And I do kind of like a challenge."
"I can see that you like a challenge. It's the only reason I haven't walked out that door yet. Kind of relentless."
She smiled, "So it's working?"
Another half-smile worked its way up his mouth as he laughed in disbelief, "Are you surprised that it is?"
His pupils coasted over her figure and then back up to her face. The warmth of his gaze singed her skin like an open flame.
"I guess I just didn't know how difficult it'd be with you."
He licked his lips, "Difficult. You have no idea. But looks like you're about to find out. Go tell your friends what's going on. Meet me out front."
Y/n watched him turn and walk away. She was shocked. For a minute she thought he wasn't going to go for it at all.
Shaking off the sudden surprise of having gotten to him she settled up with the bartender and then stopped at the table with her friends. They were just about to give her condolences for having oversold her ability but she interrupted. "He's waiting for me outside. Location is on. Don't wait up!"
Harry was leaning against a black car in the parking lot when she stepped out of the doors. The moment he saw her he pushed himself off the car and opened the passenger door for her.
It was going to be tricky to maintain the kind of confidence she'd been feigning with him up until then but there was no part of her that didn't want to find out what he could show her.
She watched as Harry sat down in the driver's seat and started up his car. He took up too much space in the seat. His big hand wrapped around the leather steering wheel while his other encased the shift stick. Even the way he drove was turning her on.
She was pleased that she'd wormed her way under his skin and that he'd given in. She'd try her best to make it worth his while. Reaching across the console she put her hand on his thigh and he glanced down quickly before setting his gaze back on the road.
Now, Harry had slept with younger women a couple of times. He generally preferred someone closer to his age because he liked the confidence and experience that came with age. Women in their 20s were often in a different stage of life and that was fine ânormal even, but it just usually wasn't a match for him. Not sexually and not mentally.
But Y/n was unusually confident for being so young. Persistent. He liked it, he couldn't lie. Whether or not she really had much else going for her beyond confidence, he guessed he'd find out. Well, she was very cute too. She did have that in her favor.
And Y/n at least seemed like she knew what she wanted. It was flattering as well. Being approached by such a pretty young thing. He figured the moment he told her to go back to her friends she'd give up but she was just fiery enough that she wasn't deterred.
When she ran her nail over his wrist he knew he was screwed. She was just close enough that he could smell her perfume and then she nudged her shoe into his shin and all he could think about was that she really wanted to be shown a good time and if anyone could it was him.
Harry knew his way around a woman's body. They were all different and he liked finding all the buttons and things that made them purr. In his experience, though, the younger the woman, the less she knew her own body. He didn't know if Y/n was just talking a big game but he was about to find out.
He stayed quiet as she ran her hand down his thigh and he shifted as the car accelerated past the green light. He'd see if she'd do anything with her hand but maybe she'd just pet at him like a novelty toy. He didn't expectâ
"This is okay?" She asked him, her tone sultry as she palmed at his crotch.
He licked his lips, "Have at it."
His cock fattened up nicely with not much effort on her part. Proof that he definitely could get it up. Plucking at his button she looked from his face to her fingers as she leaned further over the console to reach her hand into his open pants to help him with the awkward angle of his dick. He seemed to appreciate that as he shifted under her palm.
Rubbing over his heather grey briefs she peeled down the elastic band the slightest to get a peek. The dark shade of pink on his tip matched the muted raspberry of his lips. She slid the pad of her middle finger over the slit and he softly inhaled through his teeth.
She wouldn't be able to give him roadhead like she wanted. It was impossible with the stick shift in the way. But she could wrap her fingers around his shaft and feel him under her palm until they got wherever they were going.
"Mmm⊠It's so big, Harry. Knew you would be. Might be the biggest I've seen in person. Can't tell yet, though. Have to wait to see when we've got these off."
Harry pushed a laughed breath through his nose. She was a bold thing. Her assertiveness was a turn-on. He didn't like meek and shy. Not when it came to sex.
When she spit into her palm and smeared it down his length, the best she could, he parted his lips and stepped on the gas. She was already exceeding any expectations he had for her. Maybe she'd prove him wrong.
Her nail scraped the underside of him and she moaned, "Really want it in my mouth."
He gulped harshly and ticked his jaw, "Just be patient. I'll let you put it in your mouth soon enough."
"And where are we going? Your place?"
He nodded, "Just a few minutes away."
She squeezed around him and pulled upward slowly. She knew already, he was well above average and she was going to have to work to give him a proper blowy.
His house was a one story, the driveway at the front with a garage attached. He lifted his hand and pushed on a device that was clinging to his sun visor and the garage door began to open. There was a covered motorcycle along the back wall and then the garage door closed after he shut off the engine.
She moved her hand away and unbuckled herself as he got out. When she reached down to pick up her little purse she realized her panties were already wet. She grinned as she stepped out, adjusting her dress before closing the door, and then followed behind him as he led her into a dark hallway.
When he turned on the lights she took it all in. Hardwood floors led into a dining area and then a kitchen. Hung on the walls were photos of himself with two children and then more framed photos with just the kids.
"Do you have kids?"
"I do. Boy and a girl. 7 and 10."
"You're not married are you?"
He laughed, "If I were you'd have known. Wouldn't have been out in the first place if I had a wife waiting for me at home."
She nodded as he turned on the kitchen light and pulled out two glasses before filling them with water.
"Divorced?"
Handing her a glass he squinted, "Yes."
She took a sip. He was a man of few words she'd gathered. She looked around the kitchen. Wood cabinets, an outdated laminate countertop, stainless steel appliances. The space could use some updating but it was large and he had a big pantry.
Sitting the glass down on the counter she watched him closely. His pants were still unbuttoned. She eyed the space at his crotch as he placed his own glass down next to hers.
"It's not gonna suck itself."
She laughed and looked up at him. He had a genuine smile on his face that time. The first real smile she'd seen from him all night. A healthy row of clean teeth, a dimpleâŠ
"Hmm⊠I think you're right. Let's see what we've gotâŠ"
She moved in front of him and placed her hands on his pants to push them away but before she could inch them down he wrapped his meaty hand around the back of her neck and drew her into his chest. His mouth was warm and soft. His tongue tasted like the whisky he'd been drinking.
Letting go of his pants she held onto his biceps as he used his free hand to push her hips against his. Still nice and hard. He ran his tongue over her lips and she moaned into his mouth. He worked his warm lips down to her jaw and then he licked upward on her neck, the wet patch was cool on her skin from the air in the kitchen. He did it again and her knees almost gave out. She hadn't been licked like that before.
He kissed over her clavicle and then drew his tongue over her flesh. Her heart was thrumming quickly and she squeezed his strong arms when he rutted against her.
"You good at sucking cock, Y/n?" He pushed his nose against her jawline and the hot breath from his words scattered over the skin on her neck.
"I want to be," she spoke breathlessly, eyes fluttering closed as he mawed at her throat.
He parted from her neck and looked down at her, half-lidded gaze and spit-slicked lips, "Go on."
Instantly she dropped to her knees as her fingers worked deftly at pulling his pants down and then his underwear. She'd sucked a handful of dicks so she knew a couple of moves.
Getting her hand around his thick shaft proved to be a small challenge. To say he was thick⊠understatement. Long too. His tip was smooth, mushroomed with ridges along the length that she hoped she'd get to feel later on. His was the kind of cock that women dreamed of.
Looking up at him she licked her palm and used her spit to pump him slowly. Another glob over his tip for good measure. Then she pressed a kiss to the base of him, just over his sac, and screwed her eyes upward to watch his expression as she licked his balls, one side at a time. She wound her tongue all around to wet him before sucking at one side, pulling it into her mouth and he let out a ragged breath, his dark pupils spreading inky until the soft green had almost vanished.
He liked it.
She worked around the other side, sucking him in again and swirling her tongue softly underneath the tender bits. He gripped the counter behind himself.
Pulling off she straightened her back and licked upward, feeling every delicious thick ridge along his shaft until her tongue met his smooth crown. Laving every crevice of his tip, she dipped her tongue into his slit and then ran it under the frenulum before she wetted every inch of his glans.
Her mouth was watering when she parted her lips around him and flitted her gaze upward. He was watching her with a slack jaw as she took him a little deeper. He cradled the back of her head and moaned.
"Just suck the tipâŠ."
She blinked up at him and pulled her lips just over the lip, swirling and suckling around him like he wanted.
"Fuck. Just like that." His hand at the back of her head was easy. He didn't push or pull. It was more like a pleased gesture as his fingertips flexed around her skull gently.
Y/n would have liked to have gone deeper. Wanted to show him her best work. But he seemed rather happy with what she was doing.
She bobbed a couple of times, only to slide her lips back to his tip. Her pace was slow when she began to stroke his length with a little twisting motion.
He was big. She knew she could take more but in a way, she was grateful that that was all he was asking for.
A groan fell from his chest and he bucked forward, his cock slipping down her tongue and she sucked, drawing more of him in as she moved her hands away.
"Goddamnit, you're good."
She took that as permission to go deeper. Relaxing her jaw she closed her eyes and held her breath, pushing down to her limit. She filled her throat with his cock the best she could and gurgled around his tip.
He coughed out a moan and then thumbed at her cheek, "Alright, that's good."
She pulled off of him. His heavy cock aimed right at her face when she sat back on her knees and looked up at him, "I can do better than that."
He laughed and put his hand out for her to take, helping her stand up, "I bet you can. Come on."
Harry kept her hand in his as he led her to his bedroom. It was just past the dark living space and he turned on a floor lamp on the opposite side of the room from the bed. When he turned back toward her he cupped her face and kissed her again.
She pressed her hand into his warm, hard chest and he reached around the back of her dress to pull the zipper downward, his fingers dragging down her skin as he went. His touch sent a tremor down her spine as continued kissing her wetly.
He stepped back, helping her out of her dress until it fell to the floor. His eyes raked over her body and he smoothed his hands over her hips and up to her bra-covered breasts. He stepped in closer, walking her backward toward his bed. He put his hands back on her hips and nudged her to sit before he reached down to lift her leg up by her calf, removing her heels, one at a time.
Y/n's thong was drenched. She stared at him while he placed her shoes side by side at the foot of the bed and then he placed his big palms on her thighs, pushing her legs open, "Lie back."
She let her back hit the mattress as Harry got to his knees on the floor. An arm reached under her thigh as he spread her apart and then she felt her panties being pulled at until her her wet pusslips were right in his face. He groaned and felt a hand slide up the inside of her thigh. He pressed his mouth over her mons and looked up at her before he opened his mouth wide and drew his tongue through her crease making her gasp.
"Get your bra off."
She pushed herself up slightly and worked at the clasp of her bra between moans as Harry continued licking at her pussy. When she pulled her arm through the flimsy material he lifted his head and reached around her back, pulling her closer to the edge of the bed and he sucked a nipple into his mouth.
"Oh, fuck!"
Y/n's finger and her long nails pushed into Harry's hair and scraped at his scalp as he licked and pulled at each nipple. He buried his face between her tits and let out a low sound, like he was murmuring something to her but only her breasts were allowed to hear it.
When he sunk back down he pushed at her so she'd lie back and he started in on her clit, one hand holding her panties to the side as he devoured her glistening cunt.
She kept feeling like she was going to slide off the edge of the bed but Harry's grip on her kept her still. His tongue and his lips were magic as he drew her to her end. She yanked at his hair and babbled his name on repeat as her spine bowed off the bed when she came.
Her chest was still rising and falling heavy when she felt her body being pushed upward. She popped her eyes open and watched him roll a condom over his shaft before he kneed back up onto the bed next to her. He was stark naked. His body was insane. Thick muscle and masculine everything. Tattoos scatter over his arms and chest.
Fuck, she muttered under her breath.
"Flip over, for me," his deep voice was husky as he motioned toward her to move.
She rolled to her stomach and she felt his fingers slide between the band of her panties and her hips as he pulled them down her legs.
"Ass up a little. I want to see all of you, Y/n."
She grinned and turned to look at him over her shoulder as she lifted her hips and spread her thighs. His lips were parted as he grabbed her ass and squeezed, making her cheeks spread apart. He inhaled sharply through his teeth and then dipped in, kissing her pussy from behind before licking upward over her ass.
She squealed quietly and bit her lip, still watching him behind her as he lifted, a lopsided grin on his face. He gazed at her as he fisted the base of his cock and slid the head up and down her soaked folds before he tipped his hips to push in just the tip.
"Gorgeous. Gonna look even better wrapped around cock. You like anal?"
"Never tried it."
He licked his lips and pressed his lips together as he looked at the spot where his dick was pressed against her cunt, "Figured. S'alright. Pussy's my favorite anyway."
"We could try⊠if you want."
He looked back into her eyes, a cocky smile on his face, "Your little hole would need to be trained. And that takes time. So, there will be no anal tonight. Not gonna try and hurt you. But that's a cute thought."
He canted his hips inward, eyes on hers and her mouth dropped open when she felt her entrance splitting open for him. She was tight, but so slick, it only took a few slow thrusts until he was buried in with a low grunt. He pulled back and then pushed his entire length into the hilt.
"Fuckâfuck!" She cried and stuffed her face into the blankets.
"Too much?"
"No! It's so good. You're just so bigâŠ" She began to send her hips back against him and Harry slowly fucked in to match her pace. His eyes were everywhere. On her puss getting split open on his cock, the curve of her lower back, the swell of her ass.
He just knew she'd look so sweet with her ass stuffed too, but good things like that couldn't be rushed which was a shame.
Every thrust was gushy wet. Y/n bubbled out small moans every time his dick brushed deep into her guts. It was better than she imagined. The way he filled her to the brim was going to turn into an addiction. She'd never slept with any man that had her wanting seconds before they'd even finished.
"Oh my godâŠ" she mewled into the comforter.
"Fuck, I know, babyâŠ"
She fit him like a glove, it was perfect. He went in a little faster, balls thudding against her skin rhythmically making her bounce forward as she spread around his girth. When he ground in she arched her back deeply and let out a soft groan, her hands fisted at the blanket and Harry reached around and smeared his fingertips over her clit.
It had her panting and pushing into him feverishly. She'd needed the friction on her throbbing button and he'd found it easily, thick, rough fingerprints slicking back and forth as he rutted in and in. It sent electrical sparks over her limbs.
"Like that? Needs her clit touched? Shit baby, act like you've never been touched by a man right here beforeâŠ" he plucked at her like he was playing the guitar and she began to fade, her moans getting caught in her chest.
He could feel her walls tightening around him as he drove in deep.
"Fuck, Harryâ fuck!"
He grinned as he watched her shudder, "Give it up, Y/n. There you goâŠ"
She began to pulse around him, a constant stream of nonsense falling from her lips as he stroked against her channel and pushed deep into her tummy, his fingers still working her clit with ease.
Just as her body had tipped and oxygen returned to her lungs he pulled out and she felt him taking her hips and turning her around to her back. Harry grabbed her ankles and lifted until each was settled over his shoulders and pushed back inside of her, cock drilling down to her core making her teeth chatter at the way he split her down the middle.
Harry leaned over her, cock buried deep as she watched her pretty face twist up with pleasure. Plapping into her, her tits wobbled as his balls tightened against his body. The harder he plunged in, the more her legs shook. Soon, her ankles had slipped down and her feet hit the mattress as he continued drilling into her. His face was flushed hot, lips parted, muscles tensed.
Reaching up to his neck she smoothed her fingers over his warm skin and he lowered his chest down to hers and kissed her. That filthy tongue ran over her lips and he sloppily sipped at her between sucking at her lips. Her brain had turned to jelly.
She felt his hand on her outer thigh squeezing and brushing as he fucked down into her. "Mmm⊠fuck, Y/n, m'gonna comeâŠ"
He trembled over her, thick thighs pressed down and flexed as he rutted in and in and in, and then⊠he stilled. A deep, guttural moan vibrated through his chest down into hers.
She sighed when she felt him throbbing, pumping into his condom. Her fingers caressed the muscles over his back and she gasped when he bucked in harshly, once more as he emptied the last of his come into the rubber wrapped around his cock.
He slowed his kisses until they were lazy little pecks and then he looked down at her, his chest heaving. She was already grinning up at him.
"What?"
She blinked her eyes, "That was fun."
He puffed out a breath, "I guess that's a good way to describe it."
Harry was a gentleman as he pulled out slowly and helped her off the bed and led her to his bathroom. He helped her clean up and listened to her tell him about her job âjust reminding him that she was an adult after he commented on her being so young again.
When she picked her dress up off the floor and started to step into it, Harry frowned, "What are you doing?"
She stopped and raised her brows. "Getting dressed. Was gonna call an Uber. I'm sure you don't want a stranger in your house all night," she laughed.
Harry pulled at her hand, making her drop her dress, "What kind of men have you been hanging out with that let you leave in an Uber at 2 am? You'll stay here."
She opened her mouth and then closed it in surprise before tilting her head in confusion, "Really? I just assumedâ"
"You'll stay the night here. There's no way in hell you're getting an Uber at this time of night. It's dangerous."
She grinned and shrugged, "Well then⊠can I have a shirt or something to sleep in?"
He placed his warm hands on her hips, "You can have a t-shirt if you like. I prefer to sleep naked myself."
"Oh yeah? I usually do too as a matter of fact."
He held her out in his arms and eyed her naked frame, "Looks like we're both good to go then. We'll get you sorted in the morning. I'll give you a ride home then."
"I think you just want to keep me here with you," she chuckled.
Harry shook his head and released her hips before he popped her on the bottom with his palm. She bleated out a laugh.
"Get your ass in bed before I change my mind."
"Yes, sir."
. .
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falling alone â© l.hs [m]
âą part of the modus operandi series! synopsis: cold cases were heeseungâs specialty, and he cracked every single one. cold hearts were your specialty, and you have yet to make a single chip in your husbandâs. genre: established relationship au ; strained lovers. angst, fluff, smut pairing: lieutenant!lee heeseung x therapist!housewife!reader (i love plot twists) word count: 39.5k rating: 18+. minors please do not interact. warnings: for realism purposes, everyone is aged up (22-29 ; not my favorite but it is what it is.) strained marriage/relationship dynamics, workaholic dynamics, toxic relationship dynamics that are not meant to be romanticized. talks of therapy, food mentions, birth control mention, talks of having a family. detailed descriptions of disappearances, missing persons, etc. y/n feels neglected (girl STAND UP). sex as a temporary fix, swearing, alcohol, smoking. unrequited love, lots of pining on both ends. smut warnings: multiple scenes (two and a half...just read it), heeseung has a thing for y/n in business attire, petnames (baby, babe, princess, etc.,) unexplored daddy kink, heavy petting, frottage, slight body worship (m&f.rec.) nipple play, light spanking, oral (m&f. rec), squirting, lots of pillowtalk, marking, dom/sub dynamics, hair pulling, slight degrading/praise, handholding during sex (because i'm soft so what), switch!hee x switch!yn, unprotected sex (don't do this), doggy, missionary (not a babeyun fic if it's not missionary and body worship, i fear) creampie (i hate this word so bad.) i think that's it! what to listen to: falling - harry styles ; tu falta de querer - mon laferte ; seasons - dawn, gemini ; stardust - ben webster ; my foolish heart - bill evans trio ; no song without you - honne ; take me - miso ; say - keshi ; may i have this dance - francis & the lights ; unchained melody - the righteous brothers ; can't take my eyes off you - frankie valli ; can this morning never end - davin kingston ; too good - christian kuria ; u send me swingin' - mint condition ; you and me - lifehouse. author's note: it's finally fucking here, SEVEN MONTHS later. i cannot believe my life took such a turn that my original timeline of getting these all out back out to back turned into me ghosting the internet. this being said, i really hope you guys enjoy the push and pull that are heeseung and y/n in this. they're insane but they're in love and that's all that matters. special thanks to my dearest @enhaven for all her encouragement and kind words. star dividers by @/saradika here on tumblr!
Friday, 9:23PM.
 "Late night?" Your voice has always been a comfort to him. The way you cooked dinner every night, the way you washed his hair for him, the way you laid in bed with him â it was all comforting. Your soft eyes, eyes that hadn't seen an inch of a crime scene. Your gentle hands, hands that would never cock a gun and aim to kill.
You were home to him, and he hated that he couldn't leave his work at the precinct. He always brought it with him, anywhere he wentâŠanywhere you were.
"Not really. Caught a session with Dr. Bahng, I'm sorry about dinner." He loosens his tie, trying to ignore the way your eyes follow his fingers. He takes his wedding ring off for work â insisting it snags on the gloves when gathering evidence, that he never wants to sully it with such grime. "How was your night?" Your sigh may be inward, but his eyes catch everything. Every frustrated twitch of your brows, the way your nose crinkles at the half-assed apology. Your eyes linger on the linoleum floor, and he fights the urge to pull you into his arms. He fights the urge to show any weakness to your feelings, he can't let go of work. He has to be strong, he has to be coarse, he has to be cold.
"It wasâŠfine." You wave him off, moving to take the full plates off the table. Only then does Heeseung notice that you're still in your jeans, your white top neatly tucked into them. Your feet are clad in fresh socks, almost as if you were about to go out when he arrived. His eyes scan you as you move around, pulling his tie completely off and bunching it into his pocket. "Are you going out with your friends?" You don't reply as you scrape the cold food into the trash can, and he focuses on the sound of your bracelet lightly clinking with the handle of the fork. Your shoulders sag, soft curls of your hair sweeping over your face as you move to place the dishes in the sink. He sighs, before his legs move him behind you. "Why are you upset, honey?" "I'm not, I'm not upset." You scoff, turning the tap to hot when you feel Heeseung's hands ghost over your waist. You knew better than to attempt to hide anything from him, especially with the way his brain was literally trained to analyze your every movement. His lips press softly to your cheek as his fingers untuck your top, "I know you better than that." You're silent as his fingertips trace the soft skin of your stomach, his chin resting on your shoulder. He's going to wait until you decide you want to talk, despite knowing it will be the same argument you have every single week.
The same argument that always ends up unresolved as you kiss in your bed, sheets tangled between your bodies. It's enough to hold off on actually talking about it, it's enough to semi-satisfy the lack of attention you got from him during the week. It wasn't enough to feed his unvoiced, almost insatiable hunger for you, and how he wished he could just douse you in his love and affection until the sun rose. It wasn't nearly enough, because he'd still have to pry himself from the comfort of your warm embrace to step foot in the precinct and inhale the stench of evil in the world.
He felt awful, really. That he could never truly show you how much he loved you, how emotionally constipated his job made himâŠhow his sessions with Dr. Bahng were no longer of much help. "Leave work at work, Lieutenant. You have the love of your life waiting for you at home." He had it memorized at this point.
"It's always the same thing, don't worry about it." You turn the tap off, feeling the guilt about wasting water seeping into your stomach. You weren't going to wash the dishes, you knew you weren't. You just wanted to lay down in bed with your husband, basking in the few minutes of attention he'd be able to give you before falling asleep.Â
"Baby." You wince at the pet name, one so foreign on his lips. One you so rarely heard, long lost in your college memories. You grimace as you turn in his hold, his hands now resting on your hips. "Don't baby me, Heeseung." "Don't Heeseung me, Y/N. I know something is bothering you, and whether it's tonight, tomorrow, or next week â I'm not letting you go to bed like this." He looks at you through tousled locks, his eyes speaking for him. Just talk to me.
You shake your head in subtle disbelief, attempting to push past him when he pins you against the counter gently. "Let me go, Heeseung." "Not until you tell me what's going on." His voice is harsh, one he also rarely uses with you. Heeseung was always gentle, soft-spoken. "I've been at work all day, dealing with shit I can barely stomach. I just want to come home and spend time with you, what's wrong?" He's starting to whine, and it does nothing but make your eyes sting with tears.
"I just want to spend time with you, without having to beg you for it." You breathe out, squeezing your eyes shut to avoid his gaze. "You remember everything, Hee. I know you had to remember that tonight is date night." Sighing, you peel your eyes open to a guilty husband watching you with his own tired ones.
"I'm sorry, honey. It really did slip my mind. Let meâŠlet me just take a shower and we can go have a night on the town, okay?" He starts to walk away, fingers pulling at the buttons of his shirt when you clear your throat. "It's fine, Heeseung. Let's just go to bed."
"No, let me fix this. We haven't had dinner, and we haven't spent time together in weeks." He slips his dress shirt off as he leaves your line of vision, and you just slump against the counter. He was right, and you hated that you knew he was. Heeseung was always this way, though, shouldn't you be used to it by now?
Yes, he was gentle and soft-spoken, with a touch of dirty humor and thoughtfulness that always made your heart race a little faster. Your relationship was built on a lot of comfort and deep talks, ones that usually involved you unraveling yourself entirely just to get a taste of his own secrets. The two of you had met in college, about three days after the disappearance of his childhood best friend, Cha Soyoung.
Heeseung was even more cold and stoic, and wasn't interested in so much as even befriending you. He didn't really speak, which according to his friends, was unnatural. They wound up being close friends of yours as well, thanks to Park Sunghoon, and the seven of them all also ended up working at the same precinct. "Heeseung talksâŠa lot. Not as much as Jay, but he's just going through a hard time right now." Sunghoon said as he sipped his drink, carefully chewing the tapioca pearls as the two of you walked. "It's not everyday your best friend of twenty years goes missing, you know?"You had shrugged, not really understanding what it was like. Your parents had moved you around a lot as a kid, and it was hard to make friends until they finally settled when you got into your last year of high school. You had met Sunghoon there, but only met the rest of your friends through him that following summer â except Heeseung. He'd gone home with Soyoung for the summer, returning to Seoul for the fall semester at Decelis University with her and your other friends. You still never spoke, until now.
You and Sunghoon were swinging by his dorm to help pass out flyers.
"Hey, Hoon. Y/N." Heeseung spoke quietly as he opened the door, his eyes nearly swollen shut from crying for the past three days. Your jaw dropped as you looked at his face, not at all recognizing the boy in front of you. Sure, you'd only ever seen pictures of Heeseung but you knew enough to know that thisâŠwasn't him. Neither you nor Sunghoon spoke as Heeseung moved for the two of you to follow him, shutting the door behind you.
"How are you feeling?" Sunghoon asked as he trashed his drink, your own now sweating on a coaster on Heeseung's coffee table as the man gathered things around his dorm. You stood awkwardly as you swung your backpack onto the couch, opening it for Heeseung to slide the flyers in when you saw him shake his head.Â
"I don't feel much, actually."Â
Sunghoon glanced at you, but your legs moved before you could think. You rounded the table to Heeseung, who looked at your extended arms and empathetic eyes with cold ones. He'd set down the papers in his hands, fingers splayed across them momentarily before turning back to you and awkwardly entering your embrace. Your fingers easily found the nape of his neck, and his rigid form quickly softened as he breathed shakily into your shoulder. "M'Sorry." He mumbled as you felt a few tears soak through your shirt, and you just shook your head.Â
Sunghoon also wound up wrapping his arms around the two of you. Something about the way that Heeseung's fingers clawed at your sides, and the way he sobbed into your shirt made you wonder how long he'd needed someone. Someone to ease the knot in his stomach, someone to help him see that this was something that would be solved and everything would be okay again. Someone to help him hop along until Soyoung was found, and someone to leave when she inevitably took her place again.
That was nine years ago. You and Heeseung began dating a year after that happened, a couple of months after the anniversary of Soyoung's disappearance. The police stopped looking, ruling her case as a runaway. You and Heeseung never stopped searching â you frequently asked cafe owners if you could pin missing posters on their corkboards, and even went door to door every few evenings asking if anyone had seen Soyoung.Â
Heeseung had made it to the side of the law, and frequently reviewed the case to see if he had missed anything. He never had â you had all hit a dead end. Everyone's hope began to dwindle, but Heeseung never let that sway him. He even asked the forensics department to make age-progression posters, and they did. You'd pinned those up, too.
He was strong willed, he was diligent, he was determined. You love Heeseung, you love the person he isâŠ
âŠBut you hate that he can't leave his work at work. You hate that you get a crumb of his affection every few nights, whether it's his lips pressed against your cheek after dinner or his teeth nipping at your clavicle while hovering above you in bed. You hate that you find yourself longing for him even more than you did in college, despite now having him in the deepest way â as your husband, the person who loves you.Â
The man who shed a singular tear as he watched you walk down the aisle, the man who supported you when your career wasn't what you expected. The man who endlessly told you he loved you in ways that weren't so evident to the naked eye â like leaving the warm water for you and showering in the ice cold, leaving the last slice of cake for you, rubbing your feet while watching Law and Order with you on days he didn't work (read: on days you pried him out of the home office.)
Heeseung loves you, you know that. You just can't shake the feeling that it won't be for much longer.
"Tuck in your shirt."
His voice snaps you out of your trance, and you look up to see your husband now unrolling a pair of clean socks, speaking around a wide toothed comb between his teeth. He drapes the socks over the back of a chair, eyes glued to his reflection in the hallway mirror as he combs through his hair quickly.Â
Rolling your eyes, you tuck in your shirt haphazardly as he parts his hair down the middle. "You can't go out with your hair wet, you'll get sick." You call as you make your way down to the bathroom, pulling open one of the cabinets to fish out your hair dryer. "I don't have time to dry my hair. In sickness and health, anyway." Heeseung yells down the hall, and you bite back your chuckle.
"But why make yourself sick? Sit, I'll dry it while you put on your socks." You untangle the cord, plugging it into the wall as Heeseung pouts. "The sound makes me sleepy! If I'm sleepy, we can't go out." He shakes his head, and you put a hand on your hip as you give him a pointed look. He sighs, tugging a chair towards you and plopping down.
"You're throwing a tantrum like a child. Mom, I don't want to wear my coat! Mom, I don't want my peas touching my mashed potato!" You mock his behavior, making him sulk further into the chair and creasing his shirt. "Sit up!"
He does, and watches you through the mirror as you carefully comb your fingers through his hair. He wonders why you forgive him so easily, why you do these things for him when he doesn't feel like he deserves it. The wasted dinner, the way you roll his socks after doing his laundry (that he insists he can do himself.) He wonders what he's done to make you love him so dearly.
"Where d'you wanna go? Olive You More? Thyme for Love?" His voice leaves the sulky attitude behind, as your fingers card through his damp hair, and you grimace. "Why are all our favorite restaurants so cheesy? It's disgusting." "Well, we could try that new one down by the river. Pasta La Vista, I think it's called." He taps his lips with his fingers, and you catch the glint of his gold wedding band snuggled around his left ring finger. You ignore the way your heart flutters, as you lightly smack his shoulder. "No more pun restaurants! We're not in college anymore." "Ah, but I love going to those places with you. I.." The words get caught in Heeseung's throat, as they always do. He always feels like he's saying it for the very first time, just like he did all those years ago in the middle of the woods. You got stuck in a blackberry bush, and it just slipped out.
"You..?" You ask, looking at him through the mirror. Your eyes are full of concern, a look he never stops seeing. It bothers him. "I love you." He mumbles shyly, looking away to pick at his cuticles. He doesn't see the gentle smile on your glossed lips, and feels your soft hair brush his neck as you lean to kiss his cheek.Â
"Mmh, I would hope so." "Yah, say it back." He pouts as he turns to face you, and you can only smile wider before you place a chaste kiss on his lips. "I don't need to, you know who my heart calls home. Now, get up. We've got a delicious pasta dinner to inhale, and breadsticks to steal." He doesn't ask you to say it back again, only watching as you walk away with a skip in your step. He knows, he does. He knows you love him, he knows your heart calls him home. He knows you love him.
He's just worried it won't be for much longer.
Saturday, 10:32am.
"Good morning." Your voice is raspy with sleep, eyes still slightly shut as you whisper into his skin. It's a God-given miracle that he's still in bed next to you, instead of slipping out early like a college hookup.Â
Unfortunately, that happened more often than not. "Have we always had such shitty curtains? I can't sleep with so much light." He groans, tugging your arm over his head as he moves to snuggle into your chest. His breathing softens as you pull him slightly closer, wrapping your arms fully around his head and shoulders. "Mmh, if you were still in bed by the time I woke up for the day, you'd know." "You know I can't be." He sighs, and you feel the ticklish sensation of his lips feathering over your clavicle. His teeth tug lightly at your necklace, one he gave you for your second anniversary, months after the wedding. He loves that you never take it off.Â
"It's not a matter of if you can, it's a matter of if you want to." "Don't pull that, you know I do." He kisses your skin before burying his face into your neck. "I'd never leave this bed if it were up to me." His teeth are once more doing their oh-so routine nipping at the exposed skin of your shoulder, before you shift out of his reach. "We should get breakfast."
You turn onto your back, stretching your arms above your head with a soft yawn. Though blurred with fatigue, your eyes see Heeseung perfectly, his head resting lightly on your stomach. His fingers toy with the waistband of your underwear, thumb slightly slipping beneath to rub at the skin of your hip. Your tattoo peeks through, one Heeseung never lets you forget you have. His faded initials mock the both of you. "Or, counter offer: you can be my breakfast."Â
You snort, propping yourself up your elbows to get a good look at the man now in your lap. He's pressing soft kisses around your navel, eyelashes fluttering slowly as his lips pepper around your warm skin. "Hee, you barely ate dinner."
"I've barely eaten you. I'm a man deprived, please?" His eyes finally peer up at you, and you scoff out a laugh, running a hand through your mussed curls. You shake your head as you tongue your cheek, allowing him to pull at the hem of your panties once more. "I'm not above begging, if that's what it takes. You know I'll do it." "Just take them off, you big baby. You're cheesy as shit, too." You roll your eyes as he grins, a playful bite to your outer thigh as he begins to move you around as he pleases.Â
"Open." He kneels on the bed, knuckles rapping on your knees to part them. You can't help but roll your eyes again, but comply as he tugs down your underwear. It flies somewhere across the room, forgotten in a corner to gather dust, Heeseung completely unaware as he lies on his stomach.
"I've missed this." He sighs, before placing a chaste kiss on your inner thigh. "I miss you, most of all. I promise I'll be home earlier this week, baby." He doesn't give you a chance to respond as his tongue quickly finds home between your legs, softly licking at every inch he can reach. Your lip is tucked beneath your teeth, fingers grabbing at anything you canâŠ
When his phone starts ringing. He groans into your skin, the vibrations making you shiver as disappointment takes over. He ignores the sound, choosing to pull you closer onto his face when you push his shoulder with your foot. "Just answer it, Hee." "I don't want to." His voice is muffled as his tongue collects your forming arousal, a soft moan from his throat as you squirm in his hold. "H-Hee, what if it's important?" "What if it's not? What could possibly be more important than you and I at this very moment?" His eyes are filled with a mix of annoyance and desire as he rests his cheek against your thigh. You hate the pitiful groan that escapes your lips as you reach for his phone, answering it for him. "Work."Â
Sighing, he moves off the bed as he takes the call, motioning for you to stay as he speaks. "Go for Lee."
Complying, you simply become a jellyfish of a human, sprawled across your bed. You wonder why you answered the phone for him, why you pushed him to take the call. It bothers you that even now, you have begun prioritizing his work over your relationship, when you both promised each other that your love, affections and time for each other would never dwindle.
You can't say it has, though, at least for you. You love Heeseung, one could even say that distance has made your heart grow fonder. Not seeing him often has made you a bit more independent, and every time you find yourself eating dinner at the table alone, you're reminded of your mother.Â
How she berated you for marrying for love and not stability, how she shamed you for abandoning the career that drained you of everything you had. You dislike how easy it was for her to get into your head, so much so that you'd spent all of yesterday applying for new jobs in your field, while waiting for Heeseung to get home â and hopefully have your regular date night.
Not that he was even around to have said date. Sure, he made it up to youâŠbut at what cost?
As you begin to sink into your spiraling thoughts, Heeseung reappears in the doorway of your bedroom. He doesn't speak loud enough for you to hear as he beelines for the closet â a mumble of frustrations spilling from his lips as he rips a shirt off its hanger. Turning on your side, you cover your lower half with the blanket that's no longer warm before speaking to him. "Duty calls, huh?" "Yes."Â
In silence, you watch as he buttons his shirt, the muted teal making his skin glow softly. He doesn't look you in the eyes as he revisits the closet, tugging on his favorite pair of brown slacks. A pair you made for him a few years ago, right after leaving your job â and you remember the way his eyes lit up as you presented them. You remember the way he kissed each of your fingertips that night, covered with bandaids from pin pricks. You remember returning home the next day from a girls' day with Chaewon, to find a packet of colorful silicone thimbles, and a few more pieces of glittery, cream-colored fabric laid out on your bed.
Fabric he'd used to make you a dress, with flutter sleeves and a deep v-neckline. Fabric he'd used to sit and carefully hand-stitch the flowy sarong skirt. When did he find the time? He hadn't given you much of a chance to ask questions, before he insisted you put it on and let him take you out for a nice dinner.
It was the last time the two of you truly connected on something deeper than his work or your convenient unemployment. It was the last time that the two of you genuinely laughed together and did things from your younger years, like dancing in the twilight to no music and kissing in every corner possible on the walk home. The last time you wore his favorite perfume, because after that, months passed without a second thought about you.
The silence between you has grown neutral â not entirely comfortable, because who wants to spend their days without hearing the love of their life speak to them? Laugh with them, maybe even get into a bit of a spat with them that shows your relationship is becoming more than just the bare minimum? Certainly not you, and by the way Heeseung robotically loops his tie while staring you down in the mirror, a look of longing in his eyes before turning to you.
"I won't be long, I promise."Â
He notes the way your head tilts, the way an understanding smile that doesn't quite reach your eyes takes over your face. "Don't worry, take your time." The way your hair is effortlessly splayed around your head, life's odd attempt at recreating the halo to represent the absolute angel you are. One Heeseung doesn't deserve.
You get up, swinging your bare legs over the side of the bed before grabbing for your bath towel. "I'll get ready for my day, and maybeâŠ" You trail off as your toes touch his shoes â he wore them in the house sometimes, a habit of his you despised.Â
"And maybe we can catch lunch together?" He finishes, a shy smile crossing his lips as you place a gentle kiss on his cheek. His arm snakes across your naked waist, fingers lightly pinching your hip as you smile into his skin.
"Maybe. Drive safe."
Heeseung knows that Dr. Bahng told him to leave work at work. However, Dr. Bahng said nothing about bringing home to work. He said nothing about thinking about you at work, or missing you, or daydreaming about you instead of analyzing the reports that a pair of rookies messed up. He also said nothing about reading articles by some sketchy romance columnist on how to keep your relationship alive, which is exactly what Heeseung was scrolling through right now.Â
There are things in a relationship that must always be shared in order to avoid, or resolve conflict. How the other person is making you feel, how you are making them feel, and how to tackle both negative checklists properly. It is key to always remember that it must be you and your partner against the problem, not you and your partner against each other.
You make Heeseung feelâŠalive. You make him feel loved, cherished, and even at some bizarre times, worshiped. You make him appreciate waking up at the ass crack of dawn, your sleeping face relaxed as he peppers kisses across your warm skin â something he's thankful never manages to wake you up, but it adds to all the adoration he holds in his heart for you.
How does he make you feel? Dejected, neglected, rejected. Pushed aside for the true love of his life â work. You never bring it up unless he asks. You never brought it up until last July, when he was slumped in his office chair after drinking half a bottle of sherry whiskey, listening to music and thinking about yet another dead end that deterred him from finding Soyoung. You had approached him with a gentle gaze, a soft touch to his shoulder and asking about taking a shower together. You never questioned him, you never pressured him, you never tried to make him something you assumed he just wasn't â an attentive, doting husband.
And he remembers how he asked you, too. He remembers spinning around in his chair, stoically asking you if he was everything you'd ever wanted. Asking you if he was living up to your expectations, as a husband, as a life partner, as a friend, even.
And he remembers the way you sighed carefully before perching on his desk. "You're everything I've ever wanted, and I'm sure you'll continue to grow and be even more deserving of the love I hold for you." You had smiled, your hand coming to rest on his cheek. "Nothing we can't work through, you know? If I was given a choice in another life, another world â I'd still choose you."
He will never forget it, and he can still feel the warmth of your lips against his as you led him to the bathroom. He can still feel the ache of your love on his skin from the way you held him under the running water, quietly basking in his presence as the mint of your shampoo filled his nose. Nothing is as special to him as you are.Â
There are things that should routinely be shared in order to maintain a homeostasis of the calendar. Asking how their day was, if you have any ideas for dinner tonight, or if you'd like to do something this weekend to celebrate the mundane. It shouldn't be difficult to establish a routine with your partner, if you are in tune with them. A kiss goodbye in the morning, a warm embrace in the evenings. A shared meal, a shared bath, a shared bed.Â
Heeseung can't remember the last time he fully checked in with you â you always have something to do. You always attempt new creative projects, and his fingers toy with the fabric of his slacks as he remembers that you hand stitched them. He thinks about how you waited for him all night yesterday, and the disappointment you must have felt when he arrived late. He thinks about how he just doesn't make time to tackle the problem that you two are constantly glossing over by being intimate â he knows you don't feel loved.Â
He didn't ask you about your day yesterday, or the day before, or last week. He didn't ask you if you were sewing anything new, learning any new pieces on the piano collecting dust in the living room. He hasn't asked about your mother, but at least he knows you don't like to talk about her.Â
Heeseung hasn't asked you a single thing about yourself, or your life in a while â and he doesn't know how long it's been. Even last night, your eyes were focused entirely on him â the way his lips twitched when you said you liked the wine he chose, the way he pulled your leg over his in the booth you were sharing. You asked him about work, and he just shook his head as he pointed out the new menu items.Â
You love him so selflessly.
Something that works for my partner and I is parallel play. We aren't necessarily doing something together, but we are present in the same room and doing our own thing. Knowing that he is there, and that if I need him, I can reach for him, adds a comfort to our relationship. Aside from this, we also come together every two weeks and address any issues we may be experiencing â both in our relationship and our individual lives. We resolve the issues about us together, and advise the other on our personal issues. Balance!
You do this a lot. If Heeseung is home, you'll wander to wherever he is and sit down where you can, and quietly go about your business. Sometimes it's a new cross-stitch, sometimes it's just putting a headphone in and listening to music. Sometimes you're giving yourself a pedicure, sometimes you're just sitting there staring at his corkboard of paraphernalia while matching your breathing to his. It was subtle, something you thought he'd never notice.
He sighs, exiting out of the tab before grabbing his coat off the back of his chair. Tugging it on, he uses one hand to log out of his computer when he hears three knocks on the door. A lightness of the rapping knuckles similar to yoursâŠand your smiling face appears as you crack open the door. "Surprise?" He hates that he can't bite back his smile, a few of his fellow officers wide-eyed at his expression. He nods silently, and you extend your hand for him when you hear his coworkers whispering about you. With a dejected look, you tuck your hand back into the pocket of your jeans, "Guess we don't want them gossiping, right?" "Right." He mumbles, his own hand twitching around the doorknob as he pulls it shut behind him. He wants to reach for you, embrace the warmth you bring, show you off to the people he often calls his friends. Sunghoon catches his eye, a quizzical look on his face before shaking his head.Â
Heeseung reaches for you, but you've already made your way towards the door. Your smile has lessened as you open the door, holding it for him. "How was work?" You ask as he joins you in the cool air, and he wastes no time wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you in close, his nose buried in your hair. You hesitate to wrap your arms around him, instead leaning back to try and meet his eyes. "Hee?" "Don't ask me about work." He mutters, before pressing his lips to yours softly. You let out a noise of surprise, but you can't melt into his touch before he pulls away. "I hate talking about work, let's talk about you. Over lunch." He takes your hand in his, gently pulling you to his side as he makes his way to the car. He doesn't see yours in the parking lot, so he only assumes you got a rideshare before you clear your throat.
"Are you okay?" The words are slightly jumbled as he leads you to the passenger side, opening the door for you, helping you step in. "Hm? Why do you ask?" "WellâŠyou're actually out of the office. And you want to go to lunchâŠand you don't want to talk about work?" Your voice is meek, and it makes his chest ache as he reaches to buckle your seatbelt in for you. "I just want to spend time with you. Shall we?" His smile is a little forced, until he sees the soft gloss of embarrassment over your eyes. "Okay."
Tuesday, 6:23pm.
You don't really know what snapped inside of Heeseung over the weekend. He even took Monday off, turning off his phone after calling in sick and snuggling back into your embrace. He spent all of Sunday asking you random questions throughout the day, wandering around the house as you tried to pick up to start the week off fresh. He would hold the laundry basket so you could separate the clothing, he would hold the step stool so you could dust the corners of the living room â he even re-caulked the window in your bedroom because you were sitting at your vanity doing your makeup. He seemed restless to get all of these answers out of you, and while you didn't mind, you knew this attention was only temporary.
Duty called, after all.
HoweverâŠhe was home earlier than usual. He typically had his session with Dr. Bahng right after dinner time, but it seems your habit of making two portions is deemed fruitful tonight. He's sitting in front of you, having arrived home thirty minutes prior â showered and ready to share a meal with you. Just like he did this weekend, just like he did when your relationship first started out.
You remember sharing meals with him in your dorm room. Your roommate was almost never there, always spending time with her girlfriend â so you had free range of the entire place. Heeseung slept over almost every night, and the two of you would stay up at all hours of the night â whether it was discussing 80s cold cases or your major.
Your majorâŠit wasn't necessarily hard. It was one of those things that was only difficult if you didn't really like it, if you didn't have a passion for it. It was one of those things that took someone strong, both mind and body. You wanted to help better the world, see how things could change at your fingertips. You wanted to eat the world in one bite, and it simply wasn't possible â no matter your hard-earned master's degree or your passion for helping people. It was a time of realization â and it was funny, that you had the same qualifications as Dr. Bahng, but your career would never bear fruit like his.
You never really made a difference, like Dr. Bahng did. You didn't even get through to your husband like he did.
So when you came home one night a few years ago and saw Heeseung sitting at the table, waiting for you, you wondered if any of the people you helped that day would ever get to live content. You quit the very next day, your mind tortured over people you didn't know and things you couldn't control. It took a while before you got out of your head again â and even longer before you finally left your bed. It was this time when your relationship with Heeseung really tried to prove itself worthy of your time and effort â because though he wasn't home with you, to soothe your swirling anxieties and racing mind throughout the day, he was there.
He was there, with plates of fruit and warm tea. He was there, with a hairbrush gently forking through your matted hair. He was there, letting you cry yourself to sleep in his embrace and leaving early the next morning, with bags under his eyes. He understood, somehow, that you needed him more than ever before in those moments, and it seemed like that version of Heeseung was starting to reemerge â this time, without need.
"Are you hiding something from me?" You blurt, and Heeseung nearly chokes on his bite of food. Coughing, he reaches for his glass of water as you pat his back, offering him a napkin to wipe his lip. Taking a sip of water, he looks at you. "We haven't spoken all day and that's how you start a conversation?" He seems amused, a look you don't see on him often anymore. You can feel the heat of embarrassment crawling up your throat, and he pushes his plate forward, choosing to fold his hands on the table before he clears his throat. "I realizeâŠI haven't been the best husband." You can feel your eyes begin to roll, when he taps the table. "I have never been very good to you, and yet, you've stood by me. Through ups, downsâŠyou helped me out of a very dark place when Soyoung went missing." He clears his throat again, and your eyes catch the way he blinks back a few tears. "And I've given you near nothing in return." "Marriage is not transactional." You say gently, and he shakes his head. "Isn't it, though? In the eight years we've been together, you've given me so much. You take care of me, of our home. YouâŠYou can just do it all, and I admire it. I really, really do." He runs a hand through his hair, before reaching for your hand. You allow him to take it, and you hate to admit that a bit of skepticism is beginning to settle in your stomach.Â
"Why are you saying all of this? It's never mattered before, you know." Heeseung can sense something in your tone that you don't seem to catch. A hint ofâŠfrustration, anger, maybe even resentment. He knows you probably have more to say, and that whatever it was would most likely hurt his feelings.
He kind of wants you to, though, and you do â letting go of his hand. He folds them, his plate abandoned in order to take you in fully.
"Do you not want to talk about this? I can drop it, but it'll just come back up, honey." He asks gently, his head tilted to the side as he scans your face. You suck on your teeth, your fork pushing your food around before you sigh. "Maybe you're right." "About?" He straightens, his hands still folded on the table. You give him a guilty look, though he doesn't know what you could possibly have to feel guilty about.Â
"You're right, you haven't been the best husband. Hell, I don't think you've ever even really been a good husband, if we're being honest about it."Â
Heeseung doesn't react, and doesn't allow his face to move as you speak. He's finally broken the dam, because now you're rambling and you can't seem to stop.
"Was it ever going to be me, I mean, really? They say that being good to the people you love really takes no effort, that it's not hard to be doting and attentive to the person you love. You have such a hard time being here for me, you have the worst time detaching yourself from work and the cases you see everyday. You come home at whatever time is convenient for you, while I wait for you like an idiot." You blurt, and Heeseung breathes in carefully, so as to not startle you. He nods, closing his eyes.
He can sense the impending lump in your throat. He's never really seen you get angry â frustrated, irritated, even annoyed have all been emotions he's both seen and enticed. You've never been angry, you've never exploded on anybody.
"Do you ever think what your life would be like if Soyoung were still around?"Â
His eyes snap open at this, brow furrowing slightly but either you don't notice or don't seem to care, because you keep going.
"Do you think you'd even care about me if she was here? I get it, she's your best friend, maybe even the love of your life. I wouldn't blame you at all if I was just a placeholder until she was found."Â
He's watching your face as you speak, the way your lower lip trembles slightly and your chest rises and falls in shallow breathing. Your hands shake as you reach for the plate in front of him, shoving it under your own before standing up.
His chest aches at the idea of you thinking that anyone but you could ever be the love of his life, but can't bring himself to open his mouth and tell you.
"As shitty as it sounds, the more the years pass, the more I hope she's found. Maybe then you will truly have someone to love, someone who will fulfill your needs just as you like. Maybe then I won't have to pretend that I don't know I'm second to someone who isn't around." You murmur, and Heeseung feels his stomach churn a bit as you stand, taking the plates to the kitchen. You place them in the sink, holding the cool metal of the basin before turning back to him.
"I love you, Heeseung. I loved you then, I love you now, and I may love you for the rest of my life." You speak softly, stepping back to the table. You lean on the back of a chair, the necklace hanging around your neck mocking him in the dim light. "But me loving you, will never make you truly happy. I don't need you to tell me, you know? Knowing I can keep you company, knowing that you won't be alone, is fine with me. You don't need to love me."
You smile gently, the gloss on your lips sparkling. It's one of his favorites, it tastes like vanilla.
"You don't need to love me the way I love you, for me to know you care. So, don't worry about it. You don't need to check in with me, you don't need toâŠreciprocate." You shrug, taking the cups off the table, and turning back to the kitchen. You stop, looking over your shoulder. "And, Heeseung?" He can't bring himself to speak. He tries to clear his throat, but you proceed anyway. "Don't forget date night this Friday."
Thursday, 12:46pm.
You'd dropped by the precinct randomly, seeing Heeseung hunched over his computer from the entrance. The new receptionist asked you who you were here to see, and you gave his name, holding up the bag of food you brought with you.Â
"Lieutenant Lee doesn't take visitors." The receptionist rolls her eyes, and you hear Sunghoon before you see him. "Minseo, this is the Lieutenant's wife."
You whirl around to see your long-time friend, who smiles down at you. "Good to see you again. Dr. Lee." He speaks politely, making Minseo blush furiously as she prints a pass for you. She apologizes profusely, but you just shake your head and give her a warm smile, adjusting your purse on your shoulder.
"How're you, Hoon?" You ask as you paste the sticker onto your jacket, and he shrugs as he drapes his arm over your shoulders. "Could be better, could be worse. However, I did hear from a little bird that you and Heeseung got into a fight." Rolling your eyes, you know that Sunghoon is just stirring the pot. He seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to your relationship with Heeseung â seeing as he was the one who got the two of you together in the first place.Â
"We didn'tâŠugh, we didn't fight. We justâŠhad a conversation. I'll tell you about it, when are you off? We can get dinner." You say as the two of you reach Heeseung's office. He shakes his head.
"Don't put me in the middle. I'll text you though, we do need to catch up." He says, knocking on Heeseung's door for you. You hear your husband's tired voice, and Sunghoon opens the door. "You've got a special visitor."Â
You don't miss the way Heeseung's exhausted eyes look up at you, lighting up the moment they land on your face. You almost crack a smile at this, before Sunghoon shoves you in lightly. "Enjoy your lunch, Lieutenant." Heeseung doesn't say anything. The two of you hadn't really spoken since Tuesday night, and he certainly didn't expect you to come by today. Or any day, reallyâŠhe remembered the first time you ever dropped by the precinct. He'd welcomed you with a tight smile, before asking you to let him know beforehand next time. You didn't do it again, for years.
"Mind if I close these?" You ask, gesturing to the blinds, and he shrugs. He doesn't close out any of his tabs as you set the food down, kneeling on the couch lining the wall to close his blinds. He takes this moment to take you in. You were wearing his favorite dress on you, the pink one with the white-lined circle seams. You're shrugging off your jacket now that the blinds are closed, draping it over the chair in front of his desk. "I brought you lunch, I hope that's okay. I probably should have called ahead." You gesture to the bag on the table, but his eyes just peer over the monitor, his brow twitching up as you sit gingerly on the edge of the couch. He hadn't cleared up or refuted any of your points on Tuesday, but the guilt he felt that night was enough to make him sleep in the guest room. He didn't know that didn't make you feel any better, in your mind it just cemented your opinions as you let your pillow soak up a few stray tears.Â
"You look gorgeous." He murmurs as you unpack quietly, uncapping containers and sniffing them to figure out what is what. You stop, holding a bowl of broth to your face when you register what he said. "What?" "I said, you look gorgeous." He repeats himself, quickly typing up a rather unprofessional email to the rest of the precinct and letting them know he'd be leaving after lunch. He shoots it off, exiting the tab before standing up and stretching. His shirt is messily untucked, and he can feel your eyes on him as he twists to relax his back muscles. "Thank youâŠI think." He shrugs, ignoring the pang in his chest at your uncertainty before glancing over the array of food you'd brought with you. You seem a bit unsure about it all, but they're all his favorite dishes. He doesn't see any of yours â no soft tofu stew, no cold noodles, not even the tea you like. He keeps scanning your face as you prepare everything silently.
"Have you eaten already? I know you don't like any of these dishes." He asks, squatting next to you. You smile down at him, shrugging. "I'll eat at home. You left breakfast on the table this morning, so I figured you'd be hungry."
He had left breakfast on the table, but not for the reason you think. His morning routine consisted of showering, brushing his teeth and washing his face, putting his clothes on and, as creepy as it sounds, staring at you as you slept. He didn't kiss you this morning, like he usually did, but he desperately wanted to. So much so that he lost track of time just watching you sleep so peacefully, and had to run out of the house without it.
"I'm sorry, baby. I was in a rush." He pouts, and you just shake your head. "Don't worry about it. What's one day?"
It's everything. He thinks he feels your cold demeanor seep into his bones a bit, but your eyes are still warm as ever. Your smile doesn't reach your eyes, but your hand ruffles his hair lightly. He lifts slightly to sit next to you, and you press your lips to his cheek, your lipstick stamping on his skin. "You smell nice." He doesn't respond, his cheeks and ears tinging pink as you hand him utensils. Leaning back, you rest your head against the window sill, not noticing he's made no effort to even touch the food you've brought. Still, better now than never.
"I have something to tell you." You murmur, and he hums in response.Â
"I figured about as much." He leans back with you, holding a rice cake between his teeth before shoving into his mouth. "Do tell, Dr. Lee." You stare at your manicured nails, the french tip suddenly bothersome to your eyes. "I had an interview this morning, at the fifth precinct. In the next town over. "Â
He sits up, turning to face you completely. "Okay. How'd it go? I did hear that Dr. Park was retiring." Not a hint of malice in his voice, just pure curiosity. Encouragement, support.
"They said I can start next week. Three patients a day for two weeks, and then I will take over Dr. Park's patients as well. Well, those who want to transfer over." You don't know why you're nervous telling him this. His eyes scan your face, and you groan. "Why are you staring at me?" "You don't seem very happy about it." He says, tilting his head to the side as he bites into another rice cake. "I am happy about it. I justâŠit's a little far and I won't be home before you are on nights you're not set to see Dr. Bahng. I won't get to make dinner and I'll be out of the house before you are most days."Â
You stop yourself from rambling, watching as Heeseung looks at you intently. He glances at the food spread out on the table, before shoving the other half of the rice cake he bit into his cheek. "C'mon."
He gets up, yanking his coat off the hanger by the door, before opening it. "Where are we going? Heeseung, the food-" "Sunghoon, lunch on me." He calls out the door, before grabbing your jacket off the chair and your purse. Looking at you, he watches as you sit still, confusion on your face before he walks over, draping your jacket over your shoulders. "C'mon, we've got to celebrate. We can go to that French place you love."Â
Amused, you shove your arms through the sleeves of your jacket before standing. "Heeseung, you hate that place." Rolling your eyes, you reach for your purse, only for him to grab your hand and pull you in. His lips are on yours, a chaste kiss shared before he leans his forehead against yours.
"But I love you, and I'm proud of you. So let me show you, yeah?"Â
You blink up at him, before hearing Sunghoon's grunt of feigned disgust. "C'mon, guys, not in the office!"
"Shut up, man." Heeseung rolls his eyes, lacing his fingers in yours, and you hear the soft clink of metal. Ignoring the bickering between the two men, you look down, you see his engraved wedding band gleaming up at you, having knocked with an old silver ring of his that you'd taken after it stopped fitting him. "You're wearing your ring." "Hm?" He glances down at you, before smiling. "Oh, yeah. I figuredâŠI don't know. I like seeing it, it was silly of me to think the way I did about it."
Sunghoon scoffs at the sudden mushiness, and you look up to see half the precinct staring you down. Heeseung has your lipstick stamped on his cheek, and you feel embarrassed as the two of you get walked out by Sunghoon. Jungwon passes by, doing a double take when he sees the lipstick on your husband's face.
He smiles at you, a knowing look in his eyes as the two of you skirt past. Heeseung stops at the receptionist's desk, her smile disappearing the moment she sees your lipstick on his cheek. He asks her to cancel all his appointments for the day, and to let Captain Choi know that he would be taking the weekend off. She just nods, and Heeseung bids everyone goodbye with a whistle.
"She hates me, you know." You mumble, and he gives your hand a squeeze. âShe can hate you all she wants, doesnât change anything. Waste of her own energy.â
You donât know what to make of this. In a way, you think youâve forgotten your husbandâs demeanor. Heeseung squeezes your hand again, "Where's your car? Did you take a rideshare?"
His brow is furrowed as he scours the parking lot for your sedan, and you shake your head. "Saving gas, I have quite the commute." He scrunches his nose, before shrugging as the two of you make your way to his car.
He opens the door for you quietly, helping you up and going as far as taking your purse to hang behind his headrest. You always complained about the feeling of the straps against your neck when you leaned your head back.
"So." He starts, his fingers carefully turning the volume dial down as the soft jazz station he plays on his commute bleeds through the speakers. "SoâŠwhat?" "Why didn't you tell me you were thinking of going back to work? I thought we told each other everything." He says pointedly, as he makes a turn into the street. The light at the end is still green, if he speeds up a bit, he should make it. He sees you shrug out of the corner of his eye.
"Didn't think it'd be important. If I'm honest, I didn't think you'd notice." He doesn't like the twinge of sadness in your voice, but you clear your throat before he can mention it. "Should we take a walk later, as well? The weather feels great." "Yeah, honey. Whatever you want." He nods, his turn signal flicked by his ring finger, and he doesn't miss your eyes on his hands as he makes the turn. "Hee?" "Yes?" "I'm sorry." You murmur, making him glance at you quickly before you turn your head back to look out the window. Before you know it, he's pulling into an empty parking lot behind an apartment complex, ignoring the onlooking eyes of a woman taking her trash out. He parks carefully, turning the car off before turning in his seat to look at you.
"Sorry?" He echoes, and you peer over your shoulder at him. Your eyes are glossed over, and he huffs out a humorless laugh. "Oh, my baby. Come here." His arms wrap around you carefully, your hands coming to cover your face as he tucks you into his shoulder. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Y/N." "I do. I do, Heeseung. I was such a jerk on Tuesdayâ" Your muffled words stop as he pulls away, his warm fingers circling your shoulders and giving a soft squeeze. "No. You weren't a jerk, you were trying to communicate with me." "Still, Iâ" "No, Y/N. If anything, I've been a jerk." He huffs, letting go of your shoulders as his back hits the window lightly. "I've never been a good partner to you, and it's so incredibly unfair of me to think that you will just wait and wait until I just feel like being better to you." You blink at him owlishly, adjusting to tuck your legs under you. Your heels now sit on the car floor.
"I have never been good to you. No matter what it is, no matter where I am, I push you aside time and time again. It's likeâŠ" He stops, picking at his cuticles before sighing. "I love you so much. It's so hard for me to say and I still feel like some stupid teenager trying to figure out his feelings, but I know. I know I love you and I know you deserve to be loved far more than I can express." You rest your temple against the headrest, "Not everyone goes through what you did, though. I'd be foolish to think loving you would be an ordinary path." "And then you go and do that. God, you're so understanding and it kills me inside." He smiles pitifully, running a hand through his hair. "I want to deserve it. I want to come home and deserve the warm meals you make, I want to lay in bed with you and deserve your touch and your warmth and I want to deserve you."
His eyes sting with tears, and he hears a soft sigh from your lips. Lips he yearns for every second of the day, lips he loves to feel trail along his neck after a long day at work. Lips he pulls whines and moans out of, lips he kisses shimmery vanilla lip gloss off of.
You don't say anything, your fingers reaching for him in his lap. You interlock your hands, bringing his up to your lips and placing a soft kiss on his knuckles.
"I've thought about divorce, you know." You say quietly, his head snapping up to look at you. "What?" "Yeah." You breathe out, your fingers tightening around him. "I thought about leaving, I thought about taking one of the offers I've received in the last seven years for a job in the middle of a new city. I thought about packing up all my clothes, and phoning my mother for help. I figured, if she's my attorney, I can leave everything to you in lieu of me." Heeseung can feel his chest ache as you turn to look at him, your pearl drop earrings swinging with your hair as you do so. He feels like he's in a movie.
"But, I thought about being nineteen with you." "Nineteen?" "Nineteen." You laugh softly, your thumb now rubbing small circles into his skin. You place your other hand atop the pair, enveloping him in your warmth. "I thought about nineteen-year-old me, who saw nineteen-year-old you and felt the world come to a slow, slow stop."
You're staring up into the sky now, the odd sighting of the moon high in the sky at this hour was a good distraction. "I thought, what can I do to deserve him? What can I do to ease his pain, and help him hop through life until his answers are found, until he no longer needs me?"Â
"I'll always need you." He blurts, and you nod. "You're selfish like that." He silently nods in agreement, and you speak again. "You're a selfish lover." "I know." He mumbles, not able to look you in the eyes as you sigh. "But, I like it."
"I like that you're selfish." You repeat, and he gives you a quick look. "I like that even when I don't feel loved by you, you wouldn't survive without me. In lieu of me, who?" Your voice is sweet, but he knows your words hold a bit of bitterness. You like the idea of him being nothing without you, and he can't blame you for that. If you'd treated him the way he did you, he'd wish ill upon you until he no longer could. He'd hate you.
"Shall we go?" You ask gingerly, and he nods as he turns in his seat, letting go of your hand. You allow it, buckling in your seatbelt as he readies himself, turning the key in the slot before you clear your throat. "Heeseung?" "Yes?" He hates the eagerness in his voice. He hates how he's like a dog the moment you offer a crumb of your attention, but it's what he deserves. He wants to be a lovesick fool for you, he wants your every word to burn and weigh on him like the heat of a thousand fires.
Your gentle smile kills him as you look into his eyes, a shrug to your shoulders as you let the words slip.
"I love you."
Saturday, 6:43pm.
Thursday afternoon and all of Friday had been rather odd in your house.
Heeseung spent the days trailing behind you, even offering to take you out to shop for outfits for your new job in lieu of date night. You weren't surprised, though â he was always a fan of the way you styled yourself for work. Classy dresses, skirts that fell just below the knee. Long sleeved blouses with jeweled buttons, he felt like a Victorian man going nuts over the sight of your pantyhose-covered ankles.
Tonight, he'd made it a point to get slightly tipsy. You'd gone to a luncheon with your new boss earlier, so you'd arrived just as he was finishing up vacuuming the living room with a half-empty glass of bourbon and Stardust by Ben Webster played throughout the house. He wanted a bit of liquid courage for the conversation he knew the two of you had to have â that is, if he wanted things to start changing for the better.
"Hee?" You called from the foyer, watching as he spun to look at you, face slightly flushed from the alcohol. You let out a laugh, shrugging your coat off as he trekked the living room to greet you. "Babe! How was lunch? I figured I'd clean up here a bit, I know you hate when it gets messyâŠ" Heeseung rambled on about the housework as you gingerly stepped out of your heels, nodding along to his tipsy conversation. You left your shoes in the tiled foyer, walking towards the kitchen for a drink of your own. Heeseung had bought you your favorite sherry whiskey as a congratulatory gift on your new job.
"Wait, let me pour. You must be tired." He stops you from grabbing the bottle off the bar in the kitchen, choosing to skirt around you and open the fridge for a nice cube of ice. You liked two, he remembers. "How was the lunch? Did you eat?" You shrug, "I nibbled. It wasn't very good, it was at that Italian place we don't like." You scrunch your nose as Heeseung hands you your drink, making his lips curve slightly. "Funny, I was going to say we should give it another try." "No way, they fucked up my tiramisu. Remind me to never recommend that place to Sunghoon." You scoff, missing the way your husband's eyes trail your relaxed form as you lean against the counter. "And one of the other doctors was asking me so many questions about myself, it was so annoying. Like, we're not going to be best friends, man." "Like what?" He asks, listening to My Foolish Heart by Bill Evans Trio echo through the house. It was one of the songs played at your wedding, one of the first songs you and Heeseung ever danced to in college. "Oh, Dr. Lee, are you married? Oh, Dr. Lee, do you have kids? Oh, Dr. Lee, what does your husband do? Like shut up! Why does it matter, you're my husband, not his." You roll your eyes, not noticing the way Heeseung's cheeks flush at your words. Downing your drink in one go, you wince slightly, likely from the ice clinking against your teeth but you shake it off. "So, what do we want for dinner?" You poke at his side, and his arm reaches for you. You willingly bring yourself into his embrace, his arms looping around you gently as your fingers hold his t-shirt. "You look so pretty in your little outfit." "Dinner, Heeseung. Use your noggin." You roll your eyes, and he just peers down at you with an odd look in his eyes. Full ofâŠadmiration? "You're so beautiful." You feel your cheeks warm as you try to play off his effect on you, clicking your tongue. "I need you to focus here, Lieutenant. Me, your wife, would like dinner." "I heard you, baby." He nods, pulling you closer. You huff, but allow yourself to rest your head against his chest. The two of you had not beenâŠclose in this manner in a very long time â you couldn't possibly date the last time he held you like this, it was that long ago. You hate how easily you're melting into him, the warmth of his body, the gentle caressing of his hands to the rhythm of the jazz song playing in the living room.
"Should we get take out? We can watch that movie you like, the one with Al Pacino." He murmurs, carefully tugging the elastic out of your hair, releasing the curls from the ponytail you'd tied back earlier. You nod against him quickly, "And Keanu Reeves?" The two of you look at each other, and he can feel a laugh bubble in his throat at how excited you look as he nods. "Yeah." "Okay! Okay, I'mâŠgonna go change, and then we can get settled and stuff. Okay?" You blink up at him, your fingers already making quick work of the buttons on your shirt. His lip is tucked between his teeth as his eyes rake your skin, and you scoff, tugging your shirt to cover your chest. "Heeseung! Pay attention!" "I am, baby! I am paying attention!" He laughs, throwing his hands up in defense. "God forbid I want to look at you!" "You're such a man, ugh!" You stick your tongue out at him, turning on your heel when you hear him call after you. "Yeah, well, I'm your man. Deal with it!" You hate how his words make you feel like a teenager as you scamper to your bedroom, quickly discarding your work clothes into the hamper by the door. You can hear Heeseung speaking on the phone in the kitchen, soft thank yous from his lips as you unclasp your bra, sighing in relief as you dig through your husband's drawer when you hear him start walking down the hall.Â
"Jesus, warn a guy." He gasps dramatically from the doorway, and you roll your eyes as you tug one of his old band tees over your head. "Heeseung, you've literally eaten my ass." "You said you liked it!" He protests, and you snort. "It was okay. You act like you're so amazed by my boobs, you've seen them hundreds of times." You flip your hair out of the shirt, opening your own drawer to fish out a pair of bottoms.Â
"Doesn't make me love them any less." He shrugs, checking his watch. "We have twenty minutes until the food gets here." You look up at him, your fingers rooting through the drawer as you take in his avoidant look. He's nibbling on his lower lip as he stares up at the ceiling fan, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. You scoff, "Honey, we've been together for eight years. If you want to have sex, you can say that." "You make me nervous!" He groans, and you laugh out loud. "What has gotten into you, Lee Heeseung? One week you're begging to eat me out and the next you can't even look at me in my underwear! Are you alright?" You snort as you pull out a pair of his old basketball shorts, and he sighs. "UhmâŠOkay, fine. I want to talk about ourâŠsex life? TheâŠuhm, the way we kind of just skirt around all our issues with it." You blink, and you want to tell your heart not to get its hopes up at his words. This will all change in a week, your relationship is beyond fixing.
Right? "Okay. What about it? You don't like that we have sex when we can't communicate?" You nod, pulling the shorts over your legs and letting the waistband snap around your hips. He nods, fiddling with his watch when you put your hand on his wrist. "I need you to talk to me, Heeseung. You wanted to talk about this." "It'sâŠ" He breathes, running a hand through his hair as you pull him to the bed, sitting down as he slots himself between your knees. His fingers toy with the hem of the shorts you're wearing, clearing his throat. "I don't want you to think I don'tâŠenjoy it. I loveâŠbeing with you, in any way you'll have me." "Uh huh?" You interlace your fingers with his, his eyes avoiding yours. "IâŠwant to stop doing that. I know that it's a big part of how we stay connected, uhm, intimately. I know I haven't been making much time for you outside of the bedroom and that's something I want to work on." You can feel your heart pick up a bit.
"SoâŠyou want to stop having sex altogether? Or you'd like toâŠfight and make up?" You tilt your head, feeling a wave of nervousness begin to seep into your stomach. He shakes his head quickly, "I don't think I could everâŠI'd like to fight. A lot. As much as we need to." He blinks rapidly, eyes still avoiding yours when you nod slowly. "AndâŠyou want to have sex spontaneously? Do you want to schedule it? Do you want toâ" "I'm good with whenever. You can have me anytime you want, even if you don't want to have sex for the next year. I'm all yours, whenever." He interrupts, his cheeks burning pink as he clears his throat. You narrow your eyes, "Oookay. You know that goes both ways, right?" "I don't think you understand the willpower it takes not to be all over you every single second of my waking hours." His eyes are now squeezed shut, and you can feel your own cheeks warm as you feel his fingers flex around yours. You let out a soft ha, before nodding. "O-Okay, sure." "SoâŠwe're okay? Can we start taking things a little slower?" He asks with a wince, and you nod. "Absolutely." He nods, "Cool, cool. UhmâŠI'll wait in the living room for you, okay? I'll set up the movie." He pulls away with a gentle squeeze to your hands, a soft smile playing on his lips as he ducks out of the bedroom. You feel your stomach sink a bit, but out of relief. You feelâŠlighter.
You didn't mind the once-a-week sessions with Heeseung. He'd come home, the two of you would be particularly agitated â you because you felt pushed aside, Heeseung because of work, because he didn't have enough time for you, because he just wanted to feel some sort of peace. You'd try and start a conversation, only for him to push you back on the couch or the bed, or even the carpet in your living room and kiss you breathless. His tongue would slip into your mouth with practiced precision, his hand pinning your wrists above your head as he begged you to just let him take care of you.
You didn't mind because every touch from him was just right. His lips dragging against your jaw, his fingers shoved down your pants while he whispered sweet nothings. You don't know if Heeseung remembers any of the things he says during sex â how much he loves you, something he can't openly say when he's fully in his five senses. Despite feeling the way you did about your relationship with Heeseung, sex was never something you had to feel worried about â he would get just as drunk off you as he did his favorite bourbon. Sex with Heeseung was like a rollercoaster, even the very first time. He knew every button to push, every spot to caress, to kiss, to bite. He made you feel like you were swimming in a pool of lust and love and you couldn't help but cry during the middle of it all sometimes, only to feel his tongue carefully collecting your tears. "You're so pretty."
Shivering, you fan at yourself before sliding off your bed, making a beeline to your bathroom. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him softly swaying to yet another jazz song as he drapes one of your favorite blankets across the couch. You can't help but smile inwardly, shutting the door behind you as you look at yourself in the mirror. Sighing, you grab for your face wash, not able to stop thinking.
Heeseung does love you. He does, even if he's not good at saying it. He does, even if it means he bruises the stupid tattoo you got of his initials with how tight he holds your hips. He does, because he lets you claw at his tattoo of your initials on his shoulder. You still remember being drunk out of your mind when you stumbled into the studio to get them done.
And you remember that being the first sign that being with Heeseung was not temporary. You hadn't even had sex at that point in your relationship â choosing to cement your relationship with a permanent reminder. One that you knew was under his shirt even when his ring wasn't on his finger, one he knew was just under your panties even when you were mad at him for not spending time with you.
"Baby! Food's here!"Â You hear Heeseung call as you reach for your moisturizer.
Baby. A silly pet name you'd missed dearly, a silly pet name he'd used three times just today. "Coming!" You call, quickly wiping the sink of water and opening the bathroom door, scurrying out. He's sprawled across the couch, the containers of takeout spread out on the coffee table in front of him. His hand is messing with the remote, typing The Devil's Advocate into your Amazon Prime account.Â
"Hey." He murmurs, feeling you press a kiss to the crown of his head. He doesn't know why he's so nervous â he's literally seen you naked. You ruffle his hair, before rounding the couch and sitting gingerly on the floor. You didn't like to eat on the couch, Heeseung knew that. You slid in front of him, your shoulders pushing his knees apart as you rested your head on the left one. He says nothing, only leaning back as he presses play on the film.
The silence between you is comfortable. You're chewing carefully, soft gasps from your lips as if you hadn't watched this movie hundreds of times. He can't help but think if this was what he was missing out on while he was at work. You, dressed down in his clothing, holding your mouth open around a particularly overstuffed pork bun as Al Pacino dips his fingers into Holy Water.
"You're cute." He murmurs to himself, and you lean your head back slightly, a bit of hoisin sauce on the corner of your lip as you chew. "Hm?" "You're cute, babe." He shakes his head, wiping the corner of your mouth with his thumb. You blink at him, before twisting to look at him properly. Your brows furrow as you swallow, and you click your tongue. You give him a suspicious glance before turning back to the television, shrugging your shoulders as you lean back again.
He likes this. He could get used to it.
Heeseung cleaned up after you finished eating. He even ran the water for your shower, opting to go in after you. You'd pouted, asking him to go in with you â but he insisted he still had things to finish up before he could even think about winding down.
However, when you arrive in the bedroom with your hair wrapped in a towel and a baggy shirt over your shoulders, he can't help but take a peek. He sees the lavender trim of your underwear from his stance in the closet as you bend slightly to fish out a pair of sweatpants, his fingers tightening around the hanger in his hand. It breaks, the crack making you suddenly look up.
"What was that?" Your eyes are wide, scanning him as you pull out a random pair of shorts. He sheepishly hides his hand behind his back, shaking his head quickly. "Nothing, honey. Oh, I saw that you were running out of your serumâŠthing. The one for your hair, it's in the drawer." He pressed his lips together as he nodded, and you squint at him before opening the top drawer. Sure enough, the Biosilk bottle sits pretty, wrapped in the bag you knew was from the beauty supply store. You take it out, but see Heeseung grimace in the mirror. You peer at him, before seeing the broken hanger in his hand. Rolling your eyes,Â
"Maybe if you weren't so busy trying to get a peek at my underwear, you wouldn't have broken that." "Shut up." He scoffs, cheeks heating as he skirts out of the closet, throwing the hanger away in the trashcan by the door. You just shake your head, unwrapping the bottle as he appears next to you. "It's that one, right?" "Yeah, Hee. Thank you." You nod, placing it closer to the mirror. You look up at him through the mirror, noting the way he's gazing at you lovingly. "You're staring." "So?" He shrugs, and you scoff. "Get in the shower, Heeseung. I'm sleepy." "Don't fall asleep without me!" He presses his lips to your temple suddenly, and you don't get a chance to react before he's gone. You hear the door shut behind him, and you quickly grab your phone from its spot on the nightstand, abandoning the shorts you had in your hand on the dresser.
Msg To: Park Sunghoon [9:32pm] please please tell me you won't call hee in to work tmrw
You nibble on your lips, watching as Sunghoon reads the message. His chat bubble pops up, then goes back down.Â
Msg From: Park Sunghoon [9:33pm] i'll run it by the guys here in a bit, and i'll let you know. cool?
You don't reply, only giving him a thumbs up reaction. Setting your phone down, you move around for your night routine. Moisturizer, curl creamâŠbefore the large bed behind you calls your name as a siren does to shipwrecked pirates.
Flopping face down, you sigh into the pillow. You weren't ready to start working on Monday â you weren't ready to leave the comfort of your home, to talk to people all day about their problems again. You weren't ready for your mother to find out through her connections that you're practicing again.
You weren't ready to stop making two portions of dinner for your husband who wouldn't get home on time, you weren't ready to not be kissed all over in the morning even though he thought you were asleep. You'd never sleep through something so tender.
"Babe, I said don't fall asleep!" You hear Heeseung whine, and you groan into your pillow before flipping onto your back with your eyes closed. "I'm not sleeping! I'm justâŠresting my eyes." "That's sleeping." He's closer now, and you feel his lips press on your forehead. "It's fine, we have all day tomorrow." "If they don't call you into work." You grumble, and he pinches your cheek, before you feel your husband's lips brush the shell of your ear. "You should never trust Sunghoon to relay a message." "Fuck off!" You whine, shoving him away as you open your eyes. His hair has been dried, his bottom half tucked into a pair of flannel pajama pants. He's holding an old tshirt in his hand as he rounds the bed, "You're not planning on sleeping on top of the duvet, are you?" "Some of us get hot at night." You scowl, but a yelp gets caught in your throat as you feel him yank you to the edge of the bed by your ankle. You narrow your eyes as you look up at him, seeing your husband smiling down at you with a tilt to his head.
"Why the attitude, princess? Something wrong?"Â
He's talking down to you, something that makes your cheeks heat. You furrow your brows, scoffing as you prop yourself up on your elbows. His hand leaves your ankle, splaying on the skin of your thigh. "Why would anything be wrong?" He shrugs, his smile still digging into your very bones. "I figured I'd ask, since you begged Sunghoon not to call me this weekend." "Sunghoon is a rat, you know this. Remember when you pushed Jay's head into his birthday cake and Sunghoon immediately dogged you? Why would you believe him?" You try to rationalize your way out of answering his questions, but Heeseung nods as if he's understanding. "You're right, baby. I shouldn't believe him, someone who snitches everyone out because he believes there aren't enough honest people in this world." You scoff at his pointed look, knowing that Heeseung likes the little game you play. He likes cornering you, he likes giving you no way out. He likes the way your skin gets a little warmer under his touch.
"Okay, fine. I admit it!" You groan, falling back onto the bed. "God forbid I want to spend some time with my husband before I'm sent away." You drape your arm dramatically over your eyes, hearing Heeseung laugh above you. You hadn't had a night like this in so long, you can nearly feel the stupid butterflies from your college days floating back around you.
"You're going to work, you're not being shipped off to another country." He removes your arm from over your face, revealing your scrunched nose. He kisses the tip of it, seeing your cheeks bloom pink. "YeahâŠ" You sigh, before gently placing your hands on Heeseung's cheeks. He smiles down at you, "Yeah?" "I'll miss you." You admit, and his eyes soften as he captures your lips softly. His hands move to your hips, squeezing softly as he pulls back. "I'll miss you too, baby. It'll just take some getting used to." "Will you drive me on Monday?" You blurt, seeing his eyes widen as he nods quickly. "Absolutely. How early? Six? Seven?" You did not expect him to agree so fast. "Uhm, I have to be out of here by six-thirty to get there before the clinic opens." Your husband nods, and you watch the way his eyes move around as he does calculations in his head. "SoâŠwe'd be up by five?" He nods to himself, and you shrug. "You don't have to, I'm sorry I brought it up." "Kindly shut the hell up." He rolls his eyes, and you mimic his actions, pulling him back down to your lips. You don't say anything, only kissing him gently as his fingers toy with the hem of your underwear. You can tell he's holding back, not wanting to have this moment go like your usual nights together. He can't stop kissing you back though, and you can feel him slightly rutting against your leg.
"You're humping my leg." You whisper into his lips, and he shrugs, his fingers tugging down your underwear in one swift motion. "Don't care. Lie down." He pushes you back, quickly pushing your shirt up your chest until you get the hint and slip it off.
"What happened to taking it slow?" You tease as he kisses down your stomach, hissing as he nips just above your belly button. "This is slow, but if you want me to stop, I will." He looks up at you, eyes dark. You shake your head, earning another nip from his teeth.
"Words, princess." You flush deeper, nibbling on your lip as you speak. "Keep going." He raises an eyebrow, and you roll your eyes. "Please." "You're such a brat." He rolls his eyes, before sinking to his knees on the carpet. He pulls you closer to the edge of the bed by your knees, one of your legs over his shoulder as he kisses down your thighs. You're squirming, earning a quick slap to your leg. "Stop." "S-Sorry." You mumble, feeling him nose at your pussy. He inhales deeply, a groan from his lips as he places a soft kiss on your clit, a sharp breath caving your stomach in. "Pretty, always so pretty for me."Â
You don't get a chance to respond to his muttering, feeling his tongue drag purposefully through your folds. You sigh shakily, your fingers finding his hand that rested on your stomach. He laces your fingers together as he licks at you with an agonizingly slow place.
"F-faster." You whine, feeling him smile into your wet heat. "I said I'd take it slow, princess. You can wait, right? Be a good girl f'me." You suck in yet another sharp breath as his pouty lips wrap around your clit, his hand squeezing yours gently as you whimper. Your hips grind carefully against his tongue, taking all your willpower to not beg him to touch you more. "Missed you. Missed this." He murmurs, letting go of your hand to pull you impossibly closer, his arms wrapping around your thighs as he fucks his tongue into your aching center.
"M-Missed you." You whine, your hand finding home in his hair. "Pull it." He mutters into your pussy, and you tug harshly as he groans into you. The vibrations are torture, your whimpers filling the room. He takes his time, and you can feel your thighs threatening to close around his head.
"Want m-more. P-Please?" You gasp out, and you almost feel angry at the way your husband chuckles. "What happened to taking it slow? You're that needy? Can't cum like this?" You huff, yanking on his hair â earning a low moan. He obliges anyway, slipping his pants down as he stands. He towers over you, your eyes wide at his glistening lips as his hand snakes down between your legs. You shake your head, pulling it away as he laughs breathily. "Baby, I can'tâ" "I can take it. Please? I can, I promise." You beg, bringing his fingers to your mouth. He watches as you lick them clean, your tongue snaking around his wedding band. You're really and truly his for the taking, loving, fucking.
He shudders, leaning to kiss you softly. Your lips only taste of sin, your tongue sliding into his mouth with practiced ease. He groans quietly, his hard cock sliding against your soaked cunt as you whimper into his mouth. âPlease, pleaseââ
âI know baby, I know.â He murmurs, sinking into you slowly with a choked moan. Your fingernails dig into his shoulders, feeling your shaky breathing against his neck. He gives an experimental roll of his hips, relishing in the burn of your nails dragging down his back with a groan. Pushing your hands off him, he pins them above your head, interlocking your fingers.
"I love you." His lips are pressed to yours before you can respond, hips snapping at a menacing pace. Your breath gets caught in your throat, pressing your bare chest to his as he trails his mouth down your jaw. "Can never get enough of you." His soft whispers receive nothing but your whines, your hand squeezing his as he mouthed at whatever skin he could reach. "Could never ask for a better woman." He whispers into your ear, his teeth nipping tirelessly in efforts to burn himself into you forever.
"Can never get you off my mind. Think about you all day, baby." He lets go of your hands, circling his fingers around your thighs and spreading them further. You clench around him, your hands covering your face as a whine slips from his throat, fucking into you harder.
"W-Wanna live in this pussy, fuck." He groans, feeling your gummy walls tighten around him, his hand snaking down to play with your clit. Your moan is sharp, thighs threatening to close around his hips but he forces them apart as your eyes gloss over. "Need you to cum f'me, pretty. N-Need you to cream all over this dick." You open your mouth to speak, only to have it covered by his lips as he leans down to kiss you. He sucks on your tongue messily, feeling your fingers rake through his hair as you pull him back, mouthing at his neck. "W-Want you to cum inside m-me." You mumble, feeling his hips stutter against the swell of your ass, but he quickly falls back into rhythm.
"Y-Yeah? Fuck, want me to fill you up? I'll give you everything, baby. Anything you want, shitâ" He whines into your neck, spurred on by your soft whimpers of yeah, yeah â your nails dragging across his back once more, your fingers digging into his tattoo of your initials almost angrily. Your release rips through you with a loud whine, coating his thighs and soaking into the sheets, clenching like a vice around him as he straightens himself.
"Shit, honeyâ" His eyes are low as he tucks his lip between his teeth, pushing your knees to your chest as he pounds into you, pulling sobs from your throat as he fucks you through your orgasm. His head falls forward as he cums inside you, his fingers finding yours and squeezing like his life depends on it.Â
"Fuck." He mutters, pressing his forehead to your chest, the room filling with sounds of your panting and his lips trailing wetly along your shoulders and neck. "When did youâŠhave you ever done that before?" "I don't think so." You breathe out, and his skin feels sticky but he doesn't care. "WhatâŠ" He straightens, bearing his weight on his elbows as he peers down at you. You're glowing softly, your eyes slightly lower than when you'd started, lips swollen from his teeth pulling at them. "What changed? How can I be better?" Your cheeks flush deeper, shaking your head gently. "I don'tâ" "C'mon. What was it? You've never had complaints before." He says pointedly, and you smile. "Nothing to complain about, you always do well." "But?" He probes, his eyes locked on yours, and you sigh, pushing his hair off his sweaty forehead. "I don't know, Hee. I guessâŠI just like when you talk to me." Communication.
His eyes narrow as he thinks, thinking back to all the times you've had sex. He's sure he's spoken to you then, likely incoherent, pussydrunk babblesâ
"When you saidâŠ" Your voice fades, closing your eyes as you shake your head. "Nevermind." "I could never ask for a better woman."Â
It dawns on him, looking back down at you. Your eyes avoid his as you gently thumb at a red line down his shoulder, cause of your fingernails, but he tilts your face with his hand. His fingers squish the fat of your cheeks, a tear slipping from your eyes as he presses a soft kiss to your lips. "I could never ask for a better woman, my love." Your eyes flutter closed as he peppers kisses across your face, tears continuing to fall as he kisses your cheeks. "I love you, okay? I'm so fucking sorry for making you feel like you're not the most important thing to me in this world. I'd die for you, I'd kill for you, okay?" You nod silently, but your lip curls into a smile as he buries his face into your neck. "I'm not a thing, Hee." "Shut up." He whines, and you laugh. "I love you, too. I could never ask for a better man, ever." "God, don't. We won't leave this bed." He groans, and you nip at his earlobe, sucking it gently. "You promise?"
Monday, 5:32am.
He did promise.
You and Heeseung did not leave your bedroom once on Sunday. Well, he did â when he grabbed the food delivery you ordered, and to get you water on multiple occasions. You changed your sheets twice only to ruin them again, the sex messier and wetter the longer you and Heeseung went at it. He took everything you gave him in any position he could fold you into â but nothing beat seeing you laid out on your back, his fingers bruised into your hips and love bites blooming all over your body. He liked admiring you from above, sure â but he loved nothing more than his face shoved between your legs, suffocated by your warm, wet heat.
Your whimpers were burned into his mind, so much so he could hardly leave you alone when night approached. You practically had to beg him to get in the shower, his only request being that you join him.Â
By join him, he meant pressing you against the tiles and sinking his teeth into your neck and shoulders as he slid himself through your thighs over and over again. He bit down your back mercilessly, sinking to his knees behind you and lapping his tongue against your cum-coated cunt like a man starved.
Needless to say, the water ran cold and you had shampoo in your hair for an hour.
He didn't care, though. He kissed you deeply, wanting to feel every inch of you all over him before bidding you goodnight. He wanted to wake up early and make you breakfast, he wanted to pick out your pretty blouse and your heels. He wanted to be involved in your life.
"Rise and shine, baby." He whispered into your hair, holding a plate in his left hand as he pinched the fat of your cheek in the other. You groan, pushing his hand away as you roll onto your back. The duvet slips down, revealing your bitten skin. He caresses it gently, his eyes glued to your face as he goes lower. Your hand catches his wrist before he can cup your breast, peeling your eyes open reluctantly.
"I can't let you near me, you'll fuck me into the mattress." You mutter, making him smile. "Maybe don't beg me to cum inside you, and I'll leave you alone." He holds up the plate in his hand, his chest swelling at your blushing cheeks. "I made breakfast, can you get up now? I want to pick your clothes!" Your eyes widen slightly as you sit up, letting the duvet pool around your belly button as you wipe at your inner corners. "Really? You want to?" "I love seeing you dressed up for work, babe. Can I? I'll make it pretty, I promise." He draws an x over his chest, and he notices how you can't bite back a smile as you take the plate from him. He turns away as you reach for the bedside lamp, clicking it on as he practically skips into your shared closet.
"You're really chipperâŠ" You trail off, shoveling a peach slice into your mouth. He shrugs, holding up two shirts before putting them back. "It's your first day, and I read something a few years ago about marital ambiance. If I'm in a crappy mood, it'll rub off on you. We can't have that, can we?" He smiles widely as he pulls out a black dress you hadn't worn in ages â the sleeves were long and slightly flared, and the flowy skirt ended just above your knee. The neck was high, so you wouldn't be exposing any of your weekend shenanigans. "This one? Haven't seen this in, what, two years?" "We can try that one, yeah." You speak around a mouthful of oatmeal, and he nods as he turns to your shoes. "Are you walking a lot? Or can we go for the Hot Chicks?" He holds up the black leather heels, and you just smile and shake your head. "I'll take my slippers anyway, so we can go with the Hot Chicks."Â
"I checked the temperature outside, it'll be a little chilly until lunch time. Do you want pantyhose? Stockings?" He drapes the dress over his arm as he worms out of the closet, placing your shoes on the dresser as he opens a drawer. You like the sight of your husband like this. Excited for you, eager to see you take a step forward after being (willingly) stagnant for so long. You were afraid that maybe he'd discourage it â you'd overheard him talking to Sunghoon once about how your last job nearly made you lose your mind, and how worried he'd been about you.
He wasn't wrong, either â the fact that your impact felt so minuscule just made you feel like you were at home away from home. It felt like your marriage at the time, it felt like you were sixteen again talking to your mother about your dreams and being shut down. It felt bad, ugly.
You finish your breakfast and get dressed as your husband gets ready, his suit jacket the exact same shade of black as your dress, his button-up that cherry red that makes you ache with want. His slacks are pressed, his hair carefully styled as he appears behind you moments later, holding a flat iron to your head.
"No curls today, babe?" He leans against the doorway, and you smile shyly. "No, I think I want something sleek. The curls are not looking too good this morning." "Yeah?" He's not listening, running his eyes down your backside. "Hee. Stop." "I'm just looking, baby." He smiles, and you ignore the way his eyes raking across you make you feel warm. "Well, stop looking. I can't be late, not today." "So, tomorrow?" He asks, and you scoff as you pull the iron down the last strand of hair, running over the ends twice before tossing it over your shoulder. You roll your eyes, unplugging the tool as your husband's hands run over your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze. Swatting his hands away, you leave the iron to cool as you turn around.Â
"Heeseung, I'm serious." You're nose to nose with your husband, who only smiles down at you. "One kiss." "In the car, after my lipstick, when you drop me off." You propose, and he shakes his head. "Right here, right now, before your lipstick and you let me go down on you." "You're insane!" You laugh, pushing him out of the way â but not before he lands a soft smack to the swell of your ass. "Stop! Let me get ready!" "Fine, fine! I'll make coffee." He scoffs, turning on his heel and going down the hallway.Â
You shake your head to yourself, wandering back into your bedroom and slipping your jewelry on. Small gold hoops, the same necklace you wore every single day. Your wedding rings, one silver ring with the letter H on your middle left, and one on your right pinky with Heeseung's and your birthstones. A watch that was a gift from your father on your graduation day, the leather band slightly worn and molded to your wrist.
You hear a soft whistle from the doorway, and look up to see your husband biting his lip. "Are you sure you can't be a little late?" "Dude." You roll your eyes, watching Heeseung set down your silver tumbler on the dresser. He slides behind you as you check your earrings carefully, pressing his hips into your ass. âDid you call me dude yesterday? Couldâve sworn it was another word that started withââ
âHeeseung, youâre on thin ice.â You glare at him through the mirror, feeling him grind against you. âItâs almost like I can still hear you.â He hums against your shoulder, pressing a quick kiss before moving your hair out of the way, trailing gently up your neck and nipping at your ear.
âPlease, daddy. Want you so bad.â He mocks you, watching your expression change in the mirror. You huff, your cheeks burning as you look away. âDonât be shy, it was cute. Youâre cute, baby.â
âStop.â You murmur, before feeling his hand gently tilt your face towards his. He kisses you deeply, moving his hand lower slowly. Squeezing your neck softly, you whimper into his mouth before he pulls away, biting your lower lip and watching it spring back. âWeâll run this back later, yeah?â
You nod, earning a smile and a chaste kiss. âCâmon. Itâs almost six-fifteen.â
He pushes off of you, his hand lingering on your hip before he leaves the bedroom. You sigh shakily, your fingers fumbling for your lipstick as you hear him jingle his car keys. You shove it into your dress pocket, grabbing your shoes and coffee cup off the dresser and exiting the bedroom.
You shove your shoes on as you reach the foyer, watching Heeseung pull your coat out of the hall closet. âI prepped your bag before I made breakfast, can you check it?â
Everything is there. You let him slip your coat on, pressing a kiss to your cheek and carefully fixing your hair. âWhat time are you off?â
âIâll call you?â You say, and he nods. âTen minutes before?â
âYou got it.â
Neither of you say much else as you take a deep breath, opening your front door and stepping out together. You hold Heeseungâs sleeve as he locks the door, your other hand gripping the tumbler he prepared for you.
He turns, interlocking your fingers with his and bringing your knuckles to his lips. âYou ready?â
You smile nervously, âReady as Iâll ever be.â
Heeseung dropped you off a minute to seven, and even walked you to the doors of your clinic. He waited patiently as you applied your lipstick, puckering his lips cutely for his kiss goodbye. You pressed another to his cheek for good luck.
The day went smoothly. Your first two patients were two young men, both in their early twenties. One with dyed blond hair, the other with a dark brown perm. Both had tired eyes and chapped lips, bitten fingernails. The blond had a tattoo of a girlâs name on his forearm, the brunet two rings through his eyebrow.
Heeseungâs habit of jotting down small details has rubbed off on you.
Your last patient was set to arrive any minute, and you found yourself feeling uneasy. You kept changing the music you played, settling on Paradise by Sade. You smoothed the felt on the patient couch several times, even drawing a pattern in the fabric before hearing the soft knock on the door.
âCome in!â
A woman opens the door a crack, dark brown eyes peering in. Thickly lashed and lined with kohl, she presses her lips into a thin line before opening the door wider. You stand, smoothing your dress before offering your hand.
âIâm Dr. Lee. You must beââ
âIâm Jeon Chaeyoung. Itâs on my file.â She mutters, bypassing your extended hand. She sits on the edge of the couch, and you brush it off. A lot of patients were standoffish at first â getting comfortable with someone you were going to share your problems with was always something difficult, you understood that.
âYes, I know. Iâm glad to meet you, Iââ
âCan we just get into it? I donât want all the formalities.â She cuts you off, and you try not to look discouraged as you settle into your chair. âOf course. Why donât you tell me about yourself?â
She sighs, picking at her maroon polish. Something about her is off, something is oddly familiar, but you donât know what. You notice her widowâs peak has been shaved off, and her teeth are a little too well shaped not to be veneers.Â
âWell, Iâm twenty-eight. I dropped out of university when I was nineteen, and I left my hometown at the same time. Havenât spoken to anyone since, and I moved to this town last year with my husband.â
You nod slowly, tapping your pen against your notepad. You glance at her file, seeing that she had a few name changes in the last three years. Twice â Jeon Chaeyoung, before that she was Cha Chaeyoung.
Before that, Cha Soyoung.
You choke on your saliva, coughing harshly into your fist. She looks startled, her hands out as you reach for the pitcher of water on the coffee table. You pour shakily, coughing off the side before picking the glass up and taking a sip.
âS-Sorry, sorry. Had a little something. You moved here last year?â
Her eyes are suspicious as you pour another glass for her, sliding it across the table. She takes it tentatively, taking a small sip before holding it in her hands.
âYeah. IâŠran away, I guess. I felt so much pressure from everyone around me. My mother wanted me to be a bigshot lawyer, my father wanted me to take over his company on top of that. My best friendâŠâ She trails off, and you hope she canât sense how nervous you are.Â
âHeâŠugh. He was so patient and understanding, and he tried so hard to understand me. He was there for me through every bad moment of my life â my mother pressing me to be successful, my father wanting me to take over his company. I couldnât handle it.â
âSo you left. You left everything behind and you started anew.â You say slowly, and she nods, her eyes teary. âI even changed my name. I knew he would look for me, I just disappeared without telling anyone. I think he gave up, but I stillâŠâ
She wipes at her nose, and you quickly offer tissues from the table. She takes a few, dabbing at her eyes before the kohl can run. She has the same look in her eyes as your first two patients â tired, scared. Even a bitâŠremorseful.
âI got surgeries to change the way I look, you know. I have a nose job, can you tell?â She turns to the side, and you can. You can tell, the way her nose no longer has the soft button look, but the straight bridge with pointed tip. But she doesnât know you know that.
âNot that youâd know, sorry.â She laughs nervously, balling the tissues in her hands. You smile warmly at her. âI got my teeth done. And I even got half a syringe of filler in my lips.â
She puckers them, the clear gloss still shiny against the pink skin. You nod, âThey look good, though. How do you feel about the changes? Do you feel more confident?â
She shakes her head, âNo. I did itâŠto hide, I guess. I didnât want my best friend to find me, I didnât want anyone to find me. I went into hiding as long as I could, hoping my parents would just forget about me.â
âMmh. I saw your file, and you said youâveâŠchanged your name. Why, exactly? Did you want to leave behind the person that wasâŠSoyoung?â You tap the file, trying not to show the way her name makes your tongue taste sour, and she sighs. âThey opened a Missing Persons case for me. It made everything a lot harder, you know? I just wanted to disappear and start a new life doing something menial. I know it sounds stupidââ
âStupid?â You scoff, crossing your legs. âNothing you feel is stupid, Chaeyoung. Everything and anything youâve ever felt is valid. The need to run when things get too stressful, wanting to hide away from societal pressures. Everything, itâs valid.â
She lets out a shaky sob, covering her mouth as she breathes in. âIâm sorry.â
âDonât be sorry! Youâre just a human being. No one can get upset at you for not knowing how to navigate everything, this is your first time on Earth.â You shrug, and she peers up at you through teary eyes. âCan you tell me about yourself? M-Maybe itâll be easier to get comfortable.â
âSure!â You smile, eager to give her an update on Heeseung, despite her not knowing. âIâve been married for seven years. I met my husband when we were nineteen, and we started dating a little after that. I was a stay-at-home wife for the last few years, because my jobâŠâ
She stares at you intently, and you rub your neck. âI didnât feel fulfilled. My mother, quite like yours, had a lot of pressure on me. I was her only daughter, and she wanted so much. She wanted me to marry for money, and she wanted me to pursue a law degree.â
You smile sadly, and she nods. âDid you marry for money?â
âNot at all. I made more than my husband did in my first year as a therapist.â You laugh, remembering how you and Heeseung cheered as the two of you finally had enough saved for a new mattress. It was a silly stepping stone but the two of you were ecstatic.
âWhat does your mom think of you now? Do you keep in contact with her?â She tilts her head at you, and you shrug. âI donât care what she thinks, and she doesnât speak to me. She works distantly with my husband, so he sees her more often than I do. Sheâs an attorney for the city we live in.â
Chaeyoung nods, slowly. She pulls her phone out, typing quickly and scrolling before turning her screen towards you. Itâs a picture of her and Heeseung smiling as kids. Theyâre dressed as Team Rocket from PokĂ©mon, posing with V-signs next to their winked eyes.
âThis is him. Heâs my best friend. I havenât spoken to him since I left.â She sniffles, and you canât hide the way your smile falters. You feel your stomach sink a bit, realizing that she would always know Heeseung far more than you ever would. She grew up with him, she matched Halloween costumes with him. She held his hand trick-or-treating, she dyed his hair for the first time in grade nine.Â
She kissed him when they were seventeen, for the first time ever.
âAre you okay?â She asks, pulling her phone away. You nod quickly, âYeah, yeah. Sorry, I just had some memories. I was super into PokĂ©mon as a kid, but I moved around a lot and could never make friends over it.â
Itâs not a lie. You collected the cards, played the video games, and watched the Indigo League.
âDo you and your husband have kids? My husband wants to have kids soon.â She mentions, and you shake your head. âNo, not yet. We talked about it yesterday, actually.â
You had, in depth. While you were eating the shitty takeout from the diner down the road, heâd asked you. You admitted that you were open to having kids, but wanted to fix your marriage first. He agreed, but mentioned that getting off your birth control would take time to get used to. You nodded in response, saying youâd make an appointment with your doctor and the two of you could go from there.
âBut us, first. Okay?â Heâd said, holding his pinky out to you. Youâd smiled and linked your fingers, âUs first.â
âThis is my husband. His name is Jungkook.â She pulls up a photo of a particularly tattooed man, pressing his lips to her temple. He has a lip ring, and several rings through his ears. âHeâs cute! Do you feel loved? Fulfilled?â
âFunnily enough, I do. I donât feel any of the stress or pressure to beâŠperfect. HeâŠgets me. He engages me, he makes me laugh. We dance together a lot, he sings me to sleep.â She nods, smiling at the photo. âCan I see your husband? Or is that too far?â
You try not to show your hesitation, but the words tumble out before you can stop them.
"Maybe next time, yeah?" She nods quickly, a blush spreading across her cheeks. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortableâ" "Not at all! My husband is just particular, you know. His job stops him from really being a prolific person." You smile, shaking your head as you tap your notepad. It's true, you and Heeseung hardly posted things about yourselves or your relationship on social media. Your friends were all very private due to the nature of their jobs, and it'd do you well to follow that.
The rest of the session goes on without many more slip-ups. She focuses on telling you about her relationship with her husband, how he proposed. Their intimate elopement in his hometown, with just his friends and their girlfriends. You can't count how many times you heard her mention a couple named Jimin and Jeongyeon.
You can't focus on anything but the color of her eyes. How deep they are, how much of her story they hold. You're certain Heeseung would be able to figure her out in a split second, just by looking into them.
"You're very good at this, you know." She says as she tugs her jacket on, and you don't remember her ever taking it off. The hour she booked is almost up, and she looks a lot lighter than when she came in. You can feel the weight of her confessions, the weight of knowing she was alive and well after years of searching for her on your own shoulders.
You don't know if, or when, you should, or could â tell your husband.
"Good at what?" You tilt your head, and she gives you a quizzical look. "At creating a nice environment to share my struggles. I know I mostly talked about my husband, butâŠit felt nice. To tell someone about him and not have them tell me they already know that about him." You smile inwardly, knowing exactly what she means. "Yeah. My husbandâŠhis best friends are also mine. Can't really talk about all his weird little habits without them knowing exactly what I'm talking about." "Oh? You don't have friends of your own?" She tilts her head, and you laugh. "I mean, yeah. But I tend to spend most of my time with my husband. It's likeâŠa really good amusement park. I wanna go on all the rides with him, you know?" She smiles, but you see a slight flash of judgment in her eyes. Feeling your cheeks burn, you clear your throat, closing her file and putting it on the table. "Should I expect to see you here next week, Chaeyoung?" "I'd like that, Dr. Lee. My husband said he'd wait for me, so I'm going to go ahead and relieve him." She nods, before standing. You do as well, walking her to the entrance. She turns on the steps, "Thank you for listening to me." "Any time, Chaeyoung." You bid her a goodbye, watching as she walks out of the clinic with her hands in her pockets to a black station wagon. Leaning on your doorframe with your arms crossed over your chest, you see her husband get out, seeing the way he towers over her. He smiles down at her, tucking her hair behind her ear before pressing a kiss to her forehead. You can make out his lips asking How was it?Â
And her own saying I'm coming back next week. I really like this one, honey.
You feel your chest ache as he opens her door, pressing another kiss to her cheek as she pulls her seatbelt on. He shuts the door, and circles back to the driver's side. He looks up, catching your eye. He tilts his head, before smiling and opening his door. He gives you a quick wave, and you put your fingers up as he reverses out of his parking spot.
It looked so easy for them.
She looked so easy to love, he looked so eager to love her. Did people look at you and Heeseung that way, too? Did they think that about you? Sighing, you turn into your office, stretching your arms over your head. You moved around, tidying up as the music you played switched to something that reminded you more of your husband â specifically, No Song Without You by HONNE.
He'd played this song almost every day when the two of you began dating. You remember this song playing in the restaurant you had your third date at. You remember this song playing in the car when he picked you up for your twentieth birthday. You remember this song playing when he asked you to be his girlfriend, and ending just moments before he kissed you for the first time. You remember this song playing when he took you out to the flower field he proposed in. You remember his teary eyes as he knelt down before you, one of the biggest displays of emotion you'd ever seen in him. Most of all, you remember him saying there is no him without you.
You don't realize you've been standing in the same spot for the last two minutes until you hear your phone ring on the desk. You rush to it, picking up the call before even looking at the caller ID.
"This is Dr. Lee." You say, fumbling with Chaeyoung's file and the cabinet. You open it before hearing your husband snort on the other end. "Hello, Dr. Lee. This is Lieutenant Lee, I'm calling on behalf of your taxi service." "Yah! You're not my taxi." You scoff, shoving the file into the J section. He laughs, "I'm outside, baby. You didn't call, so I got worried. I picked up something light, are you almost done?" "Shit, I'm sorry. D'you want to come inside? I still have things to wrap up." You screw your eyes shut, your fingers rubbing at your temples. "Yeah, sure. I'll be right there."
It doesn't take long for your husband to appear at your door, holding his badge in his hand as you type on your computer. You give him a quizzical look, before turning back to the screen. "Did the janitor give you a hard time?"
"You could say that." He shakes head, setting his keys and phone down on your coffee table. He's holding the bag of food in his hand, and you gesture to the room. "It's nice, isn't it?" He looks around, putting the bag on your desk before opening it. "It's a lot bigger than your old office. I like the greenâŠis that Take Me by Miso?" His ears perk at the new song playing through the speakers, and you sigh, nodding your head as you slump in your chair. He nods along to the song before rounding the desk, and pressing a kiss to your hairline. "You don't look very happy, honey. Did something happen?" His hands find your shoulders as he stands behind you, and you move your mouse all over the screen. "Nothing, I'm just rebooking a patient. SheâŠsomething about her. I don't know." You know your conscience won't let you hide this from Heeseung very long. Granted, you're protected by the law if you do tell him, and it's the right thing to do.
Something in your heart doesn't feel right.
"Jeon Chaeyoung." He reads, and you nod. "Jeon Chaeyoung." "What's her deal?" He asks, making you pout up at him. "If I tell you, I'm violating our patient-provider contract." He gives you a confused look, before leaning down, brushing a kiss to your cheek. "I'm sensing a but, here." You sigh, exiting the schedule and turning the monitor off. "Let me make a scenario for you, yeah?" You stand, kicking your heels off as you walk onto the carpet under the coffee table. He nods slowly, before moving to the patient couch, taking a seat as you pace.
"Let's say, you're looking at someone in a line-up, yes?" You turn to him, and he nods. "Okay. What am I looking for?" "Something familiar. You know the perpetrator and you've known them for ages. I mean, damn near your entire life."Â
Heeseung's eyes scan your face, before humming. He leans back, resting his elbows against the back of the couch. "We have a saying about eyes, I guess. That they never lie, you know. Eyes are the windows to the soul and what not."Â
"So if I show you a picture of me and a bunch of other people, and cover everything but our eyes, you'd know which one I am?" You feel like you're starting to sound a bit like a maniac, but your husband nods. "Of course I would. I love your eyes. I look at them all the time."
You nod quickly, before breathing out shakily. "When you were nine, what did you dress up as for Halloween?" "What?" He scoffs out a laugh, "What does that have anything to do with what we were just talking about?"
You kneel in front of him, and he sits up quickly, taking in your serious expression. "Babe, what is going on?" "Did you match with Soyoung?" You murmur, picking at his slacks. "Were you Jesse from Team Rocket?"
Heeseung's brow furrows as he takes your hands, the clink of your rings grabbing your attention. "Y/N?" "It's her. She changed her name and she changed her face but it's her, Hee. I know it is, I can tell by her eyes and she showed me the two of you dressed up for Halloween as kids. That picture your mom has framed in her office." You squeeze your eyes shut, sinking back from him. His fingers squeeze yours gently before he scoffs. "Y/NâŠHoney, I really, really need you to think about what you're telling me right now." "I am, Heeseung! This is just as important to me, you know that! Countless sleepless nights, thousands of posters put up every single weekend just for her to waltz into my office today and tell me about her life!" You rip your hands from his, standing and walking to the file cabinet. You fish her file out, opening it and thrusting it into his hands.
He takes it reluctantly, his eyes scanning the file with a frown on his lips.Â
Emergency Contact: Jeon Jungkook â Cell: 010-1997-090 Work: 010-2013-0613 Relationship to Patient: Spouse
"She's married." He mumbles, flipping to the next page to her insurance information. He sees her name changes, before and after her marriage. His tongue pokes his cheek gently as you sit next to him, your ankles crossed as you sigh.
"This is rather anticlimactic." You mumble, leaning your head against his shoulder. He hums in response, thumbing the print of her electronic signature. "She never used to write her C's like this." He flicks the file, before closing it. "What happens now?" Your voice is no higher than a whisper, and you feel him sigh before leaning his head on yours. "Nothing. Legally, she doesn't have to report her reappearance. She's an adult." You look up at your husband, who has a surprisingly underwhelmed look on his face. He's nibbling on his lip as he gently tosses the file onto the coffee table. You rest your chin on his shoulder, scanning his face before he looks down at you.
"You seem tired." You say softly, and he closes his eyes. "I am. I'm so tired, honey." "You don't feel any sort of way about this? I can refer her to another clinic. I canâ" "I just want to go home, Y/N." He shakes his head, his arm coming to wrap around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. You allow it, moving to sit in his lap and feeling his hands drop to your waist. "I don't haveâŠI can'tâŠ" You look down at him, seeing the way he angrily blinks back tears as he tries to find the words he needs. Your hands gently cup his cheeks as he sighs frustratedly, burying his face in your chest. You can feel your stomach flip as he tries to breathe deeply, his shoulders tight as you wrap your arms around them. He sniffles, resting his forehead on your clavicle, your fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.
"Is it wrong to be angry at her?" He mumbles shakily, and you quickly shake your head. "No. She left, and she told me it was willingly. She came back, just a thirty-minute drive from home and she didn't tell you. You're allowed to be upset." "Then why do I feel shitty about it?" His voice trembles as he looks up at you, teary eyes full of resentment and bitterness, but behind it all is a 19-year-old boy who lost his best friend from night to the morning. You coo softly, your thumb moving to swipe under his eye as he pouts.
"Because you wanted things to be different. Finding out she's okay through meâŠprobably wasn't the way you imagined it'd happen. Maybe you had an idea of her showing up to the precinct, or to your parents' house looking for you. Maybe you saw that she's married to someone else and it hurts you, maybe you have some underlying feelings." You shrug, not noticing the way your husband's eyes narrow at your words.
"Y/N, are you hearing yourself right now?" He scoffs, gently pushing you away from him. His hands rest on your thighs, nibbling on the corner of his lip as you give him a confused look. "What?" "Did you just seriously try and equate my feelings about this entire situation to me having some sort of weird fantasy about being with her?"
You blink twice, only for Heeseung to huff out a humorless laugh before gently removing you off his lap. He stands, grabbing his keys and wallet off the table before tapping the file. "Let's go home." "Heeâ" "Let's go." He sighs, fingers grabbing the bag of dinner that you're sure had gone cold by now. He waits by the door as you gather your things, holding your coat in his hand as you slide your heels back on. "Heeseungâ" "Turn around. It's cold outside." His voice isn't harsh or mean, but you can tell he doesn't want to speak unless it's absolutely necessary. You reluctantly let him slide your coat on for you, feeling his lips pressed to your temple quickly. He opens the office door, carefully pushing you out first and turning the lights off behind him.
"Can I drive?" You hold your hand out for the keys, and he sighs before dropping them in your hand. You walk quickly towards the exit, not bothering to bid the janitor a good night as you nearly threw the door open. You could feel your stomach turn as you reached the car, Heeseung still trailing behind you when his voice cut through the air.
"Walking that quickly won't get you away from this conversation, babe." You tongue your cheek, waiting for your husband to appear next to you in front of the SUV you shared. His hand squeezed your hip gently, before pulling you close. "What are you running from, hm?" The conversation where you tell me that our marriage is over and you want out because your best friend is back in the picture, you think. You shrug, shaking your head as he pulls open the driver's side door. He sighs as you skirt around him, pulling yourself into the seat without his help. He doesn't let you close the door, wedging himself in to buckle in your seatbelt for you.
"You say some really fucked up shit sometimes, you know." He murmurs, and you feel your cheeks hot as you reach around him to stick the keys in the ignition. His hand on your cheek stops you, forcing you to look at him. "I thought we said we'd work on this. On us." "I don't want to do this here." You reply shortly, not recognizing your own tone of voice as your husband's eyes widen before he tongues his cheek. "Fine." The drive is silent, the radio turned off by your fingers the moment you managed to get the car started. Heeseung sits in the passenger side, staring out the window with a tick in his jaw you'd only ever really seen a few times, but you remember most during your first fight. It'd been two days before your first anniversary, and it'd been over the dumbest thing ever â his phone dying and you freaking out when he showed up late to your early celebration. He'd apologized profusely but you didn't want to talk about it then, just like you don't want to talk now.
Heeseung is out of the car before you even manage to park fully, careful not to slam the door as he rounds the car, opening your door and taking your bag. You reluctantly let him help you down, and he takes the keys to open the door without a word. Your home is still warm and inviting, but something about the cold demeanors floating around the two of you makes it feel like you're not even there.
"Are you hungry?" He asks quietly, and you shake your head. "No." "You had lunch at noon, why are you lying?" He scoffed, pulling his jacket off as you tongued your cheek, "I'm not. You're just assuming things." "What is the problem, Y/N? Suddenly SoyoungâŠChaeyoung reappears and you want to act like this? Did we not just have several lengthy conversations about fixing our relationship?" He grabs your elbow gently as you move to walk away, and you can't help but look at him with a frown on your face. "That was then, and this is now." "Why are you being like this? Babe." Heeseung pulls you toward him, and you huff in frustration as you try to weasel from his gasp. "You're acting like I'm some insecure housewife who needs you to coddle her. I'm not insecure, and even if I was, there's nothing you can do about it. Who cares? Why do you even care?" Heeseung gapes at you, before his hands circle your wrists so you can't move away from him. "Hello? Because I love you? Do I need another reason to want to understand why the woman I've been with for almost a decade is suddenly acting like she hates me?"Â
"Me? Hate you? Be fucking serious." You scoff, and Heeseung's eyes narrow. "Then tell me what the hell is going on in your mind, because I'm not a mind reader. I cannot fix a problem if you don't tell me what it is." "Oh, but if I were Soyoungâ" You start, but stop the moment his eyes meet yours. They're full of hurt and a hint of anger, a singular tear spilling from them before he drops your wrists with a click of his tongue. "Don't."
His voice is soft, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as he turns away from you, before shrugging his suit jacket off. He sighs shakily, and you feel your throat burn as you step out of your heels, placing them quietly on the shoe rack by the door. You purse your lips, taking a deep breath before turning on your heel, moving towards your bedroom before the tears spill from your eyes.
You didn't know what to do to stop the feeling of despair from clawing at you. And you felt stupid, thinking that you needed to even allow that feeling into your chest. You and Heeseung had spoken in depth on Sunday about your relationship â when you weren't pinned under him or vice versa. You talked about having kids, you talked about your parents, you talked about each other. He admitted to you that Dr. Bahng had told him to take some time off for the two of you before the year ended, and that he'd talk to his Captain about submitting the paperwork for a vacation sometime this week.
He admitted that he wholly believes marrying you was one of the best decisions he's ever made, and profusely apologized for his inability to cherish you the way you deserved. He held you closely as his promises to do better rained over you, and you promised the same.
He admitted to feeling his heart racing in his chest the day he met you, but was too consumed with guilt about Chaeyoung to ever bring it up, and his crush on you started developing soon after. He admitted that you made him overthink every step he took, every word he said â so much so that he figured it was just better to push you away than tell you about his feelings. The two of you recounted how Sunghoon made the two of you meet him at the campus cafe with the premise that he needed help on an assignment â only to ditch you with a frown, and figure your shit out falling from his lips as he left with Jake.
You brought up how he'd gaped at Sunghoon, and the way you awkwardly picked at your nails before confessing that you had a little crush on him. The way you rambled about knowing that his circumstances were really shitty, that you completely understood if he didn't feel the same, and that you were sorry Sunghoon put the two of you in this situation. Heeseung had only smiled as he nodded along to your words, before abruptly interrupting you to ask if you were free that following Friday. You had been, and he picked you up at seven for a date â an arcade, where the two of you jokingly did a Love Test-O-Meter and got the highest level. The two of you had scrunched your noses, but you both had deep blushes across your cheeks as the other patrons woo'd you. After, you went back to his dorm and ordered takeout, before promptly getting intoxicated on a bottle of gin stolen from Jay and watched horror films for hours before you passed out on his bed holding hands.
The rest? History.
You're struggling to pull your dress zipper down when Heeseung enters the room, his fingers gently tugging the zipper down your back without a word. You hear the gentle jazz music playing in your living room as he shuffles towards the closet, unbuttoning his shirt before hanging it back up. His hand reaches for one of the towels on the shelves, before taking another out and placing it on the bed.
A silent invitation to join him in the shower, if you so felt like it.
You hesitated, watching the way he gathered his pajamas and tucks them under his arm, the urge to follow after him far too strong as you stepped out of your dress, letting it pool on the floor. You kicked it away with a huff, before stripping entirely and grabbing the towel and your robe off the back of your bedroom door. You linger at the bathroom door, hearing the water start to pour and the sound of the shower curtain being pulled open. You walk in silently, setting your things down on the counter as Heeseung undid his belt, hanging it up on the hook by the door. You make a mental note to take it out when you leave, he'll forget it and not wear it for weeks until he sees it again. He tilts his head towards the shower as he peels off his undershirt, signaling for you to get in while he gets undressed.
The water is hot against your skin, and you close your eyes with an inward sigh. He steps in moments after, before tilting your head back just slightly so the water can cascade through your hair. Your hands instinctively move to touch him, but you retract back to your sides. He gently takes them, wrapping them around his waist like you usually do.
He doesn't say anything as he washes your hair gently, your eyes closed so as to not take in the image of your husband's slightly swollen eyes. His fingers card through your hair smoothly, before you feel his lips on your forehead.Â
"I love you. Don't say it back. Don't say anything." You don't, but you're sure he sees the tear that slips from your eye as you nod silently. It comes so easily to him now. So, so easily to let you know how he feels about you. It makes you weak in the knees.
The rest of your shower is like that, his lips brushing chaste kisses all over your face as he repeats himself over and over, I love you, I love you, I love you. Your tears are hot as they continue to spill, and you finally slip out of the shower when he asks you to take the extra pillows off the bed â his final kiss to your lips after carefully washing your face for you.
You do as he asks, taking your decorative pillows and piling them in the closet like you usually do. You silently get dressed for bed, not bothering with your skincare â you'll just cry it off. Your hair is still damp when you lie down in one of your husband's old shirts and a pair of Spiderman briefs you stole from him years ago. He quietly turns all the lights off but leaves the music playing in the living room, before walking into the bedroom as he pulls his shirt over his head.
Your vision is blurry as you look up at him, his face illuminated by the evening moonlight. He sighs as he sits on your side of the bed, his hand sliding under the duvet to rest on your thigh. "Come dance with me." You blink a few times, staring at him before closing your eyes, shoving the duvet to the side and swinging your legs over the side of the bed. He stands, taking your hand in his and making you follow him to the living room.
You hear the opening notes of Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers â yet another song from your wedding â as Heeseung pulls you into him, planting a soft kiss to your hairline as his hands find home on your lower back. You exhale into his chest, feeling his heartbeat quicken as you slide your hands under his shirt, resting them high on his back.Â
"I love you, I'm sorry." You mumble as he sways the two of you gently, and he hums in response.
"I need you to know that I've never had feelings for Chaeyoung." He says clearly, and you close your eyes. "I've never had feelings for her, in any way that wasn't platonic. There are plenty of reasons she and I never got together after she kissed me when we were teenagers. Not that they matter, because all that matters is that I didn't feel the same, I never have and I never will." You don't respond, feeling your eyes sting with tears.
"It's only ever been you for me. I've never once thought back to when we started dating and thought that I'd wouldâve been better off with anyone else. I've never wanted anyone that isn't you, and I think that is equally as beautiful as it is terrifying. In lieu of you, who? I'd have no first love without you, youâre the only love I want." "I'm sorry." You whisper as your tears soak into his shirt, and he pinches your hip lightly.Â
"I'd genuinely be nothing without you. You are the most patient, loving person I've ever met. No one makes me want to be a better man like you do. I feel sick every time I have to get out of bed and go to work, but I remind myself that you only deserve the best. This house, our things, what I hope I can provide for our future kidsâŠit can only be the best. So, I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry for giving so much importance to the future, which isn't a bad thing in itself. But, I've ignored my present. You're a gift from life, I've ignored you and it pains me to know I've caused you so much distress. So much so that you resort to feeling like this, like I'd ever leave the love of my life, the love for my life, for someone else."
His hands find your face, cooing at the pout on your lips as he gently wipes your tears. "I meant everything I said this weekend, too. I could never ask for a better woman, not when I have you." You only let out a sob in response, your husband cuddling you into his chest as he turns the music off when the song changes. He rubs your back as he moves the two of you back to the bedroom. He only separates from you to slide under the covers, but pulls you flush to his chest and envelopes you tightly in his arms.
"I love you so, so endlessly. Please don't ever doubt that again." He sighs shakily, pressing his lips to your temple as you bury your face in his neck. "I love you, Hee."
Friday, 3:40pm.
It'd been three weeks since you told Heeseung about Chaeyoung's return, and she'd become a regular patient at your clinic. She told you more about her husband, her friends, and how she missed Heeseung. She asked you about your life, and you did everything to avoid mentioning names, even going as far as avoiding certain questions. You kept Heeseung updated with everything, and the more you told himâŠ
âŠThe more disinterested he became. It was odd to you, but you said nothing as he changed the subject, as he rolled his eyes, as he kissed you in the middle of your sentences.Â
Heeseung also made it a point to drop you off and pick you up from work every day, insisting he enjoyed it. He made your breakfast and picked your clothes, and it was like every morning was a challenge to see if he could convince you to take a trip to the bedroom in your work clothes. He'd succeeded twice, and you were late to work both times. He hadn't been successful since, earning soft swats of your hand and gentle shoves.
However, this morning â you did it all on your own. Heeseung had recently taken on a new case and it was cutting into his sleep. He came home not even an hour before you woke up, several apologetic calls and texts throughout the night before you fell asleep at midnight without him.
You tucked him in, planting kisses across his face as you shrugged your coat on. He didn't stir, and you packed his breakfast and lunch and left it on the table. You took the long way, playing the same soft jazz station he did every morning.
One of your patients had called to reschedule, so you'd have an early afternoon home. You got a text from Heeseung moments after arriving at the clinic, complaining about why you didn't wake him up to take you â only for him to call you at noon and say he'd barely gotten up for work. You'd laughed and teased him about thinking he'd be able to take you to work when he clearly needed the rest, only to hear Sunghoon tell your lovebird of a husband to get off the phone and focus.
It'd been nearly four hours since then, and you were about to wrap up with Chaeyoung.
"I found him on social media, you know. His mom posted a congratulatory post, he works in the same town. He's a lieutenant at the Seventh Precinct." She picked at her nails, a frown on her lips as you try not to show your shock at her words. "Who, your best friend?" "Yes. He's married now, too. I couldn't find anything about her, though. His parents didn't post anything about the wedding but a backshot of him and the bride." She sighs, and you think back. You'd both asked his parents to keep it private, and they both chose that photo to post across their social media to boast to their friends. You'd appreciated it so deeply that you bought them a rice cooker for Christmas that year.
"Do you plan on going to see him at some point?" You ask smoothly, refilling her glass of water as she shrugs. "I planned on going today, actually. I'm justâŠnervous. I had a friend drop me off today, and I'd be going alone. I feel like I'd need a support system." "I can go with you, if you'd like. I'm headed that way anyway." The words tumbled out before you could stop them, and her eyes widened with surprise before she smiled. "You'd do that?" "Of course. This is a big step for you, you know? I'd just have to make some calls, I know that precinct happens to be rather finicky with visitors." You shrug, feeling the pit in your stomach grow deeper as you wonder how you're going to tell Heeseung. She nods excitedly, and you excuse yourself, walking down the hall so nothing can be heard through the door.
The line rings three times before Heeseung picks up.
"Hey, baby. What's up?" "You can't be mad at me. Promise you won't get mad." You rush out, and he laughs. "I won't be mad. At least, I don't think I'll be. Are you okay?" "She wants to meet you. She said she's going over there today, and my stupid ass offered to drive her over because I'm going home early, anyway." You're wincing as the line goes silent, before your husband sighs. "Oh, babygirl." You can picture him pinching the bridge of his nose, the particular pet name only really slipping when he's stressed. "I'm sorry, honey." "No, no. It's fine, just..let me get some stuff settled, I'll let Minseo know to let you through without issues." He trails off, before another sigh is heard. "Does she know we're married?" "She found that back shot from our wedding. She doesn't know it's me." You sigh shakily, and your husband only echoes it back. "Alright, I'll let the guys know. Will you be in the room? I don't think I can do this alone." "Yes, of course. I won't be there as your wife, though, if that'sâŠfine. Just think of it as that one time we roleplayed."
Your husband snorts, "Babe, that was the most awkward thing ever." "Because you can't hold character! But don't worry, we'll spin that one back someday." You hum affirmatively, earning a soft laugh. "I love you, baby. I'll see you in what, thirty?" "I'd run red lights for you if it wasn't illegal and dangerous." You shrug, despite him not being able to see you. He's probably rolling his eyes, a click of his tongue coming through the phone. "Be good, honey. I'll see you. Love you." "I will. Love you." You shoot a few texts off to the other detectives as the line hangs up, before sliding back into your office and seeing Chaeyoung sprawled across the couch with her arm over her eyes. "You alright in here?" Your soft chuckle startles her, and she straightens quickly, brushing her hair out of her face. "Sorry, I'm nervous." "Not to worry. They know me well, so don't be startled if anyone says anything." You smile as you grab your coat, before floating over to your computer and clicking around. "Ready to go? We can even stop and get a little drink for the drive." "You're such a girl, I love it." She giggles, and you feel your stomach sink as you shake your head with fake amusement. You feel awful lying to her â she'd been so open and honest, warming up to you incredibly fast. She eagerly bounces alongside you as you walk to your car after gathering your belongings and locking your office, slipping into your passenger seat as you quickly buckle yourself in.
The ride is full of nervous chatter from her and you drop your guard a bit, opting to talk to her about Heeseung through memories. You tell her about your first date, and she's amused, telling you about her first date with her husband â talking about how the two of them wound up getting lost in Busan because he'd forgotten his way around a smaller part of town. You only smiled throughout.
You arrived at the precinct with an iced coffee from a shop a block away, Chaeyoung holding an Americano as she nervously chewed her lip. You spoke to Minseo softly, your eyes pointed as she nodded â it seemed Heeseung had vetted everyone before your arrival. "Go ahead, Dr. Lee. Lieutenant Lee should be in his office, his schedule is clear for the afternoon." "Thank you, Minseo. Take a break soon, okay?" You give her a warm smile and this time, she returns it, before printing your visitor stickers and giving one to Chaeyoung. Her fingers tremble as she sticks it on her denim jacket, and you see Sunghoon staring intently in your direction before you give him a dirty look.
"Dr. Lee! Good to see you, it's been a while." He wanders over, draping his arm over your shoulders as you try not to groan in annoyance. "Detective Park, always a pleasure." "Sunghoon?" You hear Chaeyoung whisper, and he glances over at her with a mock look of surprise. "Yes? Do I know you?" She opens her mouth, but you quickly shake your head, reaching for her hand. "Later. I promise you'll have time."
"Sorry." She mumbles, but she looks over her shoulder at Sunghoon for a bit as you walk through the precinct. You note the way her eyes widen at the sight of Jake and Jay, their serious faces contorting to ones of confusion at her longing glances. They all pretend like their hearts aren't racing out of their chests as you knock on Heeseung's door, hearing an affirmative sound to come in.
"Lieutenant Lee." You poke your head in, squeezing Chaeyoung's hand in yours as your husband looks up. You fight the urge to say he looks handsome in his white button down and blue suit jacket, but he stands before you can say anything else.
"Dr. Lee, always a pleasure to see you. How can I help you?" He opens the door further, and you can almost hear the way he thanks his years of training for the stoicism on his face as he sees Chaeyoung. You pull her into the office as he steps out of the way, her eyes wide as you sit her down and quickly close the blinds, sticking your tongue out at Sunghoon for good measure.
You almost forget Heeseung has a few photos of you on his desk, and you look over your shoulder to see them all facing the wall behind his chair. You nearly sigh in relief, but clear your throat instead as you sit next to Chaeyoung. Heeseung smiles softly, checking his watch.
"How can I help you, ladies? Oh, I'm Lieutenant Lee Heeseung. At your service." He extends his hand, noting the way hers trembles as she takes it. He gives it a firm shake, before glancing at her again. "You lookâŠkind of familiar. Have we met before?" "I can't." She whispers, her hand gripping onto the sleeve of your coat as you nod, before clearing your throat. "It's okay. You want me to talk?" She nods without a word, and you give Heeseung a pleading look. "So, we have a bit of aâŠpredicament." "Right, as one would assume." He nods slowly, and you note the way he nervously chews his lip before taking a seat on the opposite side of the couch. "Are you in danger, or some sort of trouble?" He clicks a pen from his pocket, opening a drawer from the side table to take out a notepad.
"More like we have some answers to a case that went cold a few years back." You hear him hum, the pen not touching the paper as he looks up. "Alright, should I pull up some records?" "If you'd like, but it was a Missing Persons case you were involved with. Do you remember when we talked about it when we first met? The Cha Soyoung case?" "AhâŠright. Right." He clears his throat, and you can see the tears beginning to well in his eyes as he blinks them back. "That case has long been dry, with lots of dead ends. Everyone in the precinct is familiar with it. Last update was, what, three years ago? Some sightings a few miles away." "Lieutenant, this is Jeon Chaeyoung." You introduce her properly, her eyes peering at him over your shoulder. He blinks, nodding slowly. "Formerly known as Cha Soyoung." He tilts his head at your words, as if he didn't already know. He stares blatantly, and you make her scoot up a bit so he can get a better look at her face. His eyes scan her repeatedly, before he stands up and moves to his desk, opening a drawer and taking out one of the many missing posters you used to put up every week. He looks at it for a moment, and sighs shakily. "You know, I appreciate you coming byâ" "Hee, it's me." She blurts, a few tears rolling down her face as you see a pained look on your husband's face. He nibbles on his lip, his eyes full of stress as he looks at you. She stands up, and Heeseung tongues his cheek as he shakes his head. "Soyoung had a widow's peak, and a birthmark on her neck." "Heeseung, please. I know you're upset, and IâŠI'm sorry. I've missed you..." She trails off, and you note the way he's near tears, looking away from her, the paper crumpling in his hand as he clears his throat. "Dr. Lee, can I see you outside?"
Chaeyoung gives you a look of despair, and you just pat her shoulder with an apologetic look as you watch Heeseung storm out. "I'll talk to him, don't worry." She opens her mouth to speak, but she just sighs. Nodding, she takes a seat, and you tighten your coat around you as you follow your husband out. He's in the break room a few feet away, and he nearly shuts the door with a slam as you slip inside. His arm reaches for you, pulling him into you roughly and squeezing you so hard you can't breathe for a moment. "I can't do this. I'm not strong enough, Y/N." His voice is unsteady, but you snake your arms around his waist with a hum. "You know, I was worried. I was beginning to think you were going to let this all justâŠgo. You are strong enough, and you can do this.. I know this is scary, it's so overwhelming. I know you, though. You're Lee Heeseung, you don't give up on anything. It's been almost a decade and you've worked so hard to get here. Don't you want to see the fruit of your hard work?" Your voice is soft but stern, and your husband only whimpers pitifully into your shoulder. You coo, running your hand down the nape of his neck as you sway the two of you gently. "I love you, baby. I believe you can get through this. You deserve a happy ending to it all. So many years of stress won't be good for your hairline." He actually snorts at your joke, but the tears continue nonetheless as he moves away, pouting as he sits in one of the chairs. You wipe your hands on his cheeks gently, offering him a tissue from your pocket as you squat in front of him. "It's gonna be okay. I promise." "I don't want to make amends. I don't think I can forgive her for this." He sniffles, and you nod in understanding. "That's okay, too. You don't need to be her friend again, even if that's what she wants. You owe her nothing, and vice versa." "I love you." He whines, covering his face with his hands as you laugh softly. "I know, I love you too, Hee."
"No, seriously, I'd ask you to marry me again if we weren't already married." He grabs your hands quickly, and you nearly lose your balance as he jerks you forward, enveloping you in a crushing embrace. "Submit your vacation paperwork and we can renew our vows instead." "I love you so much!" He cries into your coat. You can't help but laugh out loud, a bit of shock running through you as you take in his very big emotional outburst. "I know, I know! Now please, get it together. We've got to get back, and you need to talk to her. The poor girl is vibrating out of her skin."
"Kiss me." He pouts, looking up at you as you stand. You roll your eyes. "After. Promise." "I need it for encouragement. Be the wind beneath my wings, babe." He begs, making you sigh. "One kiss, and keep your tongue in your mouth." "Two kisses to make up for the lack of tongue." He counters, and you smack his arm before pressing your lips to his. His hands instinctively hold your waist, your own moving to hold his cheeks gently. It's slow and sweet, and you pull away as his teeth nip at your lower lip.
âStop that." You brush two more chaste kisses on his lips, a pout appearing as you squeeze his hand. "Come on, we have to." "I love you." He repeats for the umpteenth time, and you know he's finding comfort in knowing that you both feel the same and are there for moral support. "I love you, Hee. Now, let's go." The other detectives pretend they don't notice the way you hold his hand tightly as you both exit the break room, Heeseung ducking his head to hide his teary eyes as you open the door to his office. You pop your head in, seeing a rather disheveled Chaeyoung on the couch.
"How're we feeling?" You call gently, squeezing Heeseung's hand behind you before you let go. She gives you a thumbs down as she wipes her eyes, and Heeseung clears his throat behind you as he carefully slips past. She shifts as he does so, and you shut the door behind you. He sits across from her carefully, her eyes shimmering with tears as she peers up at you.
Heeseung does the same, before glancing at your wedding rings. They're snug on your finger, and you carefully thumb at them as you gingerly take a seat on the couch next to Chaeyoung. You give him a pointed look, and he sighs, running his hand through his hair.
"I'm sorry, Hee." She whispers, and he nods. "I'm sure." "I really am. You would've talked me out of it, I know you."
Heeseung's hands flex on his knees, "You could've talked to me, at least. You could've said literally anything. You just up and left and expected no one would care." "You don't get it, Hee. I felt so much pressure from everyone around me, I was so tired of pretending like I wanted any of that for myself. I didn't want to take over the company, you knew that." She tries to reason, but you can tell he's fighting himself from saying anything out of line as he takes a deep breath.
"It's always what I knew and what you knew, but you clearly forgot the fact that you were my best friend. Since we were kids, and the most painful part of this all is confirming that you didn't trust me that entire time. There's no coming back from this."Â
She's silent as he picks at his nails, before she speaks softly. "Don't you at least want to know how I'm doing?" He scoffs quietly, folding his hands in his lap. "Sure. Tell me everything you've built for yourself while I've spent a decade agonizing about whether or not you're alive." His tone is harsh and you find yourself giving him a hard look, your jaw tight as she looks down. He doesn't apologize, and you find yourself speaking softly.
"A lot of big feelings here, hm? There's a lot of pain to get through, soâŠlet's not take anything to heart right now." You nod, and Chaeyoung nods next to you as she clears her throat. Heeseung doesn't acknowledge it, opting to bounce his leg.
"I got married. I know you did too, right? During college?" She nods, and he clicks his tongue.Â
"Heeseung, be nice." You say his name out of habit, his eyes snapping to you as you wince at your mistake. "Didn't know we were on a first-name basis, Dr. Lee." "You know what I mean." You roll your eyes, and Heeseung sighs. "Yeah, I got married in college right after I turned twenty-one. Seven years ago."
"You're awfully young to be a Lieutenant." She says softly, and he struggles not to roll his eyes. "Doesn't take much to get promoted when you're constantly mulling over cases and neglecting other things for someone who didn't want to be found. You could've called, you know."
"Could I have? Because it seems like you hate me for doing what's best for me." Her eyes are narrowed now, and he scoffs. "I think I'm allowed to hate you for all its fucking worth at this point. You abandoned me nine years ago, you just up and left without a word! Do you know how many birthdays I had to spend answering questions about you instead of celebrating with my loved ones? You know how many date nights I shoved aside with my wife because I was here, hoping I'd get a crumb of knowing that you're at least alive? Do you understand how much of my life has gone into this?!" Heeseung is starting to lose his patience, but it seems Chaeyoung had been ready to blow her top for years.
"What about me, Heeseung?! You think I liked always being on the fucking sidelines, waiting for you to notice me? I had to fucking disappear for you to care about me? For you to look my way even once, I had to uproot my entire life? Is that what it had to fucking come to?!"Â
Your lips part at her words, Heeseung's eyes widening before they narrow. "Are you serious? That's what you want to attribute this to? I didn't reciprocate your feelings so now I'm the bad guy? You fucking left, instead of communicating with anyone. You made that decision, no one forced you to take that road." "I did what I had to, and the fact that you never wanted to be with me despite us literally being the perfect love story was just the cherry on top. It was my catalyst and I hope you know that I resent you for making me feel so undesirable." She huffs, and you clear your throat as Heeseung glowers.Â
"I thinkâŠwe've lost our way a bit. This was more about reconnecting, I assumed it'd be a bit more peaceful. The blame game gets us nowhere." You sigh, running a hand through your hair. Chaeyoung takes a deep breath, struggling not to roll her eyes before pulling her phone out. "This is my husband. You'd like him, he plays bass and he produces music for an entertainment company. His name is Jungkook, we got married two years ago." Heeseung gives you a glance, your eyes nervous as you breathe out.
"Everything alright?" He asks gently, and you know it's his way of asking if he can talk about you. Your eyes are nervous, but you nod anyway, playing with the hem of your dress. Chaeyoung gives you a once over, patting your knee with a smile.Â
"I'm sorry, I know this must be stressful. I should've never taken your offer, Dr. Lee." "No, I think this was necessary, really. For the three of us." You shrug, attempting to appear nonchalant. Her smile doesn't reach her eyes as Heeseung clears his throat, standing up to grab the photo of you off his desk. It's you on your honeymoon â the two of you took it the summer after you graduated from college. You were wearing a white dress and it was one of the most picturesque candids in your collection. He gives you a waywards glance, but you only nod as he sits down.
"This is my wife. You'd like her, she plays piano and crochets and does cross-stitch. She's a therapist. Her name is Y/N, we got married seven years ago." He flips the picture, and you watch her eyes widen out of your peripheral vision. She takes it gently, her manicured thumb stroking your smiling face. She looks pale as she turns to you, her jaw tight.
"Chaeyoung, I'm sorry." You whisper, and she gives you a glare. "Are you? You knew this entire time and you let me open up to you about everything? Did you tell him, too? Did you tell everyone here?" Her voice only raises as she scoots away from you, and you feel your cheeks heat as you run a hand through your hair. "We spent years looking for you, Chaeyoung. There were so many sleepless nights, so many tears, so much stress over you. This is hard for me too, you know." "What, loving a man who is nothing but a shell of a person? Yeah, I'm sure you loved filling his fucking cup until it overflowed while he casted you aside." She sneers, and you feel your chest tighten. "I'm sure it felt great being stuck in your house, wondering when the fuck he'd be home because he was here. Looking at case files, talking to forensics, doing anything instead of being home with you." Your throat burns as you clear it, but Heeseung interrupts as he takes the photo of you back. "Chaeyoung, you're obviously angry. I can't blame you for that, but I also won't allow you to speak to Y/N like this. She's here to help both of us." "Yeah, well you can take your help and fucking shove it, Y/N." She huffs, gathering her coat from the couch cushion. You stand quickly, holding your hands out to deter her from leaving. "Chaeyoung, please let me explainâ" "Explain what? How you're a lying bitch?" She spits, and Heeseung's eyes narrow as he opens his mouth to say something, only for you to wave him off. Your gaze is unreadable as she continues to berate you. "You want to explain why you let me agonize over Heeseung for three weeks, and how you listened to me tell you how I felt about him and said nothing? What kind of fucking therapist are you?" "A dumb one." You say softly, "I didn't tell you I was married to Heeseung because that's none of your business. Getting you involved in my personal life could be incredibly damaging to my career, but I did it because I've known about you since before I met Heeseung." Her eyes are aflame as she stares you down, but you don't budge.
"I don't fight over men. I never have, I never will. What I will do, though, is tell you that though I knew mixing my personal life and my career could be a disaster, I did it because I love Heeseung. You suffered, you left because of all the pressure you felt. I understand that pressure, too. I know what it's like for your family to expect something from you that you simply don't want to provide, or feel like you can't."
Her eyes well with tears as she looks away.
"Just as you suffered, though, we did, too." You gesture at the space between you and Heeseung, and he steps slightly closer. "I cannot tell you the nights we spent walking all over town and putting posters anywhere they'd allow us to. I cannot even begin to explain the stress everyone felt, all of your friends, all of your family members because you just disappeared. I wasn't your friend, and I didn't know you personallyâŠbut it affected me, too." A tear falls down her face, and you reach to wipe it with the sleeve of your coat.
"There were so many nights that I'd be in Heeseung's dorm just talking about you. He'd tell me so many stories, he's shown me so many photos of you together. He's told me every piece of your life that he knows, and you've sat in my office for three weeks and done the same for him. Things I already knew, and things I didn't." She silently sits back down, letting the tears drip down her face.
"I know it's painful, to want something or someone so bad and have it be just out of your reach. I know it sounds like I'm bragging, or maybe like I'm trying to rub it in your face but I promise I'm not. Loving Heeseung has not been easy, there were many times I wanted to give up. There were nights he'd be locked in the home office, overthinking himself into a bottle of bourbon." You laugh softly, taking Heeseung's seat across from her. He stands behind you, his hand running up and down your back.
"There were times I wanted to scream at him, I wanted to hurt his feelings because he made me feel neglected. He'd come home late, he'd miss dinner, he wouldn't be around to just hang out. You told me during our first session that you and Jungkook dance together all the time, that he sings you to sleep. I cannot tell you how envious I would have been, had I met you just a week earlier."Â
Her gaze meets yours, surprised. "What?"
"I mean what I say and I say what I mean." Heeseung speaks up, his voice a lot softer. "I was not a good husband. I'm still not, but it's not your fault. It's my fault, I wanted so badly to know that you were at least okay that I completely neglected Y/N. I wasn't present, emotionally or physically." "I knew it wouldn't be easy, loving someone like Heeseung." You interrupt him, "I knew loving someone who had gone through something so gut wrenching would be one of the most difficult things I'd ever have to do. I wanted it so bad, Chaeyoung. I wanted to love him, and be the glue that held him together. I wanted to be the person he woke up with in the mornings and the person he kissed goodnight. I wanted to be there, no matter what it took." "So you allowed all of it." She murmurs, and you sigh.Â
"I fought it. I didn't want to brave the storm that was Lee Heeseung in college. But like a moth to a flame, I stayed. I got hurt time and time again, but the good outweighed the bad so much. I saw so much potential, I saw so much kindness and I knew in my heart I could help it flourish. And now, we're here." "Don't you feel jealous?" She asks, making you smile sadly before nodding. "Of course I felt jealous. I knew there was a girl that knew my husband more than I ever would, and I envied that. I wanted to know everything there was to know, but I had to come to terms with the fact that it simply couldn't be. We're ever-evolving, and while you may have known each other for so many yearsâŠyou've both changed so much." She closes her eyes, her chipped nails digging into the fabric of her peacoat. Heeseung's hand rubs circles into your back, before you feel him squeeze your shoulder. "I don't hate you." She says suddenly, her eyes on Heeseung. He clicks his tongue, "I don't expect you to. I haven't done anything to you to make myself worthy of hating."
"Why not me?" She mumbles, and Heeseung's eyes close as he pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Just tell me that." "I can't do that to you, Chaeyoung." He shakes his head, and you hear her scoff. "Just do it, it'll make getting over you a lot easier. I already know you're married, I'm not going to make a fucking move." "I wouldn't allow it, either." He says through gritted teeth, making you shift in your chair, clearing your throat. "Would you like for me to step out?" "No." They say in unison, and Heeseung holds onto your shoulders as he looks at Chaeyoung. "Don't you think your family wants to know you're okay? It's been nine years." "What, do you keep up with them? Do they care about anything else besides that stupid company now?" She rolls her eyes, her jaw tight as she stares at her boots. "Your father sold it." Heeseung speaks softly, "He sold it not even a week after you left. Your sister bought it from him and funded half of the search party that looked for you for a year." Her eyes stay narrowed as her lips purse. "Doesn't mean they care. It was always the company this, the company that. Just like you, Hee." She glares up at him, "Focus on school, Soya. Let's study, Soya. We got into college and you just stopped wanting to hang out like we used to." "I'm 'just like them' because I prioritized my studies? Because I was on scholarship while mommy and daddy paid your way? My fucking bad, Soya." He scoffs, making her scowl. "See? You're just like them." "You're ungrateful! You've always been so blind at how things were just handed to you, you were always so fucking out of touch with everything! Your father had an entire company, a collection of businesses that he sold because you just wanted to up and leave! I don't think you will ever understand how privileged your life has been, even in the years you've been gone." His laugh is humorless as he shakes his head, and you clear your throat.Â
"I think maybe this has been enough for one day." "You don't get to decide that, Y/N. I still want an answer. Why. Not. Me." She's standing now, her face tear-stained but her eyesâŠthey're full of fury. Towards who, you're not entirely sure anymore.
You look up at Heeseung, his jaw clenched as he runs a hand through his hair. "You just don't have what I need. I won't be with someone who can't make me feel fulfilled in all aspects of life, or someone who doesn't share the same goals as me. You don't see the world the way I do, and you never have." "And she does?" She gestures at you, her voice thick as her eyes gloss over once more. "Yes. She does. She is everything I could ever ask for and so much more than I will ever deserve." He folds his hands in front of him, "There is always going to be something in this life you cannot have, whether it be an object, a person, even a stick of gum. You can't hold onto that resentment forever, it will make you miserable. You shouldn't live your life that way, not when you have a husband who loves you and a life people would kill for. Not when someone you said was your best friend over and over has someone who loves him." She glares at him, her chest rising with shallow breaths. She shakes her coat off, pulling it over her arms and walking towards the door. Her hand wraps around the doorknob as she looks at the two of you, the tick in her jaw growing tighter as she sees you stand.
"You don't have to act like this, Chaeyoung. You don't have to keep running away, you'll never solve anything this way." "You're married to the man I've been in love with since I was six years old. You lied to me, knowing I was in pain about this entire situation, and you stand here and try to act innocent. You're just as guilty as I am, so you don't get to tell me how I get to act, Y/N." She whispers, a singular tear rolling down her face as she turns to Heeseung.Â
"You can tell my parents, and whoever else you please. Y/N can give them my information. I won't be coming back to Seoul, and I won't be visiting your practice again. Do not contact me further, and I won't make a scene."
She throws the door open, revealing the gaggle of detectives bunched around the door. Sunghoon nearly falls into the office as they disperse like bugs, catching himself on the doorframe. Chaeyoung stares up at him, his own eyes flickering to you. "You okay in here?"
"Fine." Heeseung replies curtly, and Chaeyoung scoffs, pushing past Sunghoon with a scowl on her face. She stalks through the precinct, and Minseo stares wide eyed as she shoves Jay and Jake out of the way to the double doors. Your eyes never leave her, continuing to stare after her as the doors shut.
You hear a disappointed sigh from your husband, and you peer up at him as Sunghoon shuts the door with his lips pressed into a thin line. He looks a mess, and you move to comfort him as Jay opens the door. He strides in confidently, a quirk in his brow as he pulls his hand out of his pocket, a new pack of cigarettes in his hand.
"Shall we?" It doesn't take much convincing to get you and Heeseung out the backway of the precinct, and you find yourself resting your forehead against the rough brick of the building. Jay lights your cigarette, sliding it between your fingers as Heeseung lights his own. You mumble a thanks, before holding it between your lips.
"Long day, huh?" He starts, his words muffled as he holds his own between his lips, the flicker of the lighter catching your attention. You nod, pushing off the brick wall to face the two men. Jay gives you a once over, "New dress?" "Storage." You shake your head, blowing smoke from your lips as Heeseung paces back and forth. "How's your girlfriend?" "Not my girlfriend, just a fling. Cut her off a bit ago. Feeling good, though." He nods, and Heeseung walks by you, your hand reaching for him. He takes it, leaning against the wall as he pulls you to him. He spins you around, making you face Jay as he wraps his arm in front of you. "PDA? From Lee Heeseung?" Jay acts shocked as you snort, closing your eyes as you lean your head back onto his shoulder. "You'd be surprised what Lee Heeseung has been up to these days." "Mmh, do tell." He shrugs, flicking the ash off his cigarette. "Did you know sharing details of your sex life to your friends is considered inappropriate social behavior?" You smirk, and he raises his brow.
"Oh, don't tell me the people who have been married for seven years are fucking. Oh man, holy shit." Jay sarcastically rolls his eyes, holding his hand to his chest as if he were clutching pearls. "Like animals." Heeseung speaks for the first time since you stepped outside, making your eyes widen as Jay's do the same. You glance up at him, watching the way he throws the cigarette butt onto the floor and stomps it out with his foot. He plucks yours from your fingers, slotting it between his lips for a slow drag before giving it back. His lips have a layer of glitter on them from your lipgloss.
"Hee, you cannot say that." "Who cares? It's Jay. It's not like he's going to ask to watch us fuck." He shrugs, making your cheeks grow hot as you turn to Jay to apologize, who is looking away with red ears. Heeseung looks over, blowing smoke out of his lips as he speaks. "Dude." "You fucking brought it up, dickwad." Jay scoffs, before stomping out his own cigarette butt. You don't speak, opting to run a hand through your hair as Heeseung sighs.
"Did you guys hear anything through the door?" "Every word. Walls are thin, you know." Jay nods, offering another cigarette. Heeseung takes it, sighing as Jay hands him the lighter. "I cannot believe she's been in love with you since you were kids." "She's not in love with me, she's infatuated with the idea of me." He rolls his eyes, fiddling with the lighter. "Her parents used to fight in front of us all the time, and when we were seventeen she told me that she wanted something better than that. Admirable, truly, but she was never going to find that with me." He holds the blue flame to the cigarette, before handing it back to Jay. "Wasn't she your first kiss?" "Ugh, yeah. I only said yes because she kept talking about how Mina, you remember her sister Mina? Mina had her first kiss at sixteen." He rolls his eyes again, his arm around you tightening slightly as he leans his head back onto the building. "I think a part of me hates her." "That's valid." You and Jay say in unison, before Jay tilts his head for you to continue. You shake yours, shrugging as Heeseung continues to talk. "She always pushed for us to become more and I just didn't want that. She lacks so much compassion, and that's why her father wanted her to take over the company. She's cold and calculated and that's why I befriended her in the first place, because no one wanted to be her friend. She was mean to everyone, but I guess she learned how to fake it well." You'd never heard Heeseung speak of her this way, but he clicks his tongue before you can ask anything. "I don't want to keep talking about her. I still have to call her parents, fuck." He runs his hand over his face. The three of you sigh in unison, a snort from Jay as he notices it, "WellâŠI can say that I'm glad to know she's alive, even if we don't let her back into our lives."
"Yeah." Heeseung nods, taking a final drag from the cigarette in his mouth before dropping it and putting it out. "I guess that's the silver lining in this all. Nine yearsâŠman." You nod silently, before patting his arm. "We can call on Monday when I get home from work. I have to get all her information, anyway, and remove her from my patient registry so her insurance stops getting processed." "Shit, I forgot about that." Heeseung groans, slumping slightly as Jay laughs. "You guys head on home, we can get paperwork processed to actually close the case. We'll see you on Tuesday, Lieu." "Tuesday?" He echoes absently, and Jay scoffs. "Fine, Wednesday. Is that too much time away for you, workaholic?"
Your laugh makes Heeseung look up, watching you as you put out your cigarette. The two of you only indulged every once in a while, and Heeseung never fully took the habit up after you refused to kiss him one night after a smoke. Jay bids the two of you goodnight as you all walk back into the building, his box of cigarettes now broken in and Heeseung beelining for his office to grab his coat. "Hungry?" You ask as he shrugs it on, and he shakes his head. "Wanna go home and shower, go to bed. Wanna cuddle?"
He never asks. You canât bring yourself to say no, not that youâd want to anyway.
It's easy with you. You end up leaving your car in the precinct parking lot, dropping the keys on Jake's desk with the promise of dinner if he dropped it off at your house before morning. He rolled his eyes but agreed. The entire precinct watched as you left, Heeseung's arm holding you close â a sight they'd never seen.
"Can I be the little spoon tonight?" He asks as he buckles you in, and you press a kiss to his temple. "Yeah, Hee."
Monday, 6:32pm
The two of you spent the weekend processing everything that happened. You reluctantly left your husband's side for work this morning, driving yourself as he slept soundly. Your day felt incredibly slow, your hands aching to feel his warm skin under yours.
You'd felt the need to coddle him all weekend â you made his favorite meals, you massaged his back, you even made him a new pair of slacks. A navy blue this time, his smile shy as he modeled them for you on Sunday night. The two of you cuddled for hours, Heeseung burrowing his face in any crevice you'd allow. He kissed your skin all over, mumbles of I love you and hold me tighter falling from his lips as you spent the passing hours in your bed.
Your last patient of the day was a young girl in her twenties, her eyes constantly glossed over with tears as she tried to get comfortable with you. She wound up sobbing, your chest aching as you tried to comfort her. By the time she left, she looked much better â and she told you, thank you for your help. You have no idea how long I've been holding that in. It was enough to make your chest swell with pride as you drove home, a smile on your lips as you picked up dinner and played soft jazz on the radio. You felt the weight of the world slip onto your shoulders as you pulled into your driveway, killing the engine as you fished your house key out of your bag.
You'd contacted Chaeyoung's insurance the moment you got to the clinic, and pulled her from your patient registry without a second thought. You shoved her file into your bag and pushed the thought of it all out of your mind, choosing to focus all your energy on your patients and the way your shoes hurt your feet.
"Baby?" You called into the house as you opened the door, kicking your heels off with a sigh of relief. The cold tile of the foyer against your hot skin felt like Heaven, a shiver running down your spine as you set the bag of takeout down on the dinner table. You stop to listen, but hear nothing. "Baby, are you home?" You walk down the hall, reaching to take your earrings out as you cross the threshold to the bedroom. You see your husband laying on his back with his headphones on, the light off and curtains drawn. He wouldn't be able to see you if his eyes were open, but you can see him thanks to the light in the hallway behind you. His arms are crossed over his face, but you hear the familiar quiet sob fall from his lips. You feel your chest ache at the sight, but you don't interrupt him. You merely move your hands from your ears, leaving the earrings he gifted you a few years ago on as you fold your hands behind your back.
You watch him cry for a few minutes, before he groans in disgust. He wipes at his face angrily, sitting up abruptly with his eyes wide. He jumps as he sees you, his hand flying to his chest as you smile. "Hi." "Holy shit, babe. Don't do that." He takes his headphones off, carding his fingers through his hair as you shrug. "Maybe don't lay on our bed in the dark when I call for you twice." He rolls his eyes as you near the bed, your palms cool against his skin. "Anything you want to talk about?" Your thumbs wipe his cheeks as he shakes his head.
"Same old, just angry at the entire ordeal." He mumbles, his hands finding your hips. You hum, pressing a kiss to his hairline. "Well, I brought dinner. Come eat with me." "What did you get?" His voice is muffled as he buries his face in your stomach, the buttons of your vest annoying him as he huffs. You card your fingers through his hair, dragging your nails along his scalp, "I stopped at Pasta La Vista." "What happened to no more cheesy pun restaurants?" He snorts, and you pinch his cheek. "Ah, but I love going to those places with you. I love you, you know."Â
He sighs, reaching up to turn the light on. His fingers tug gently on the pull cord, the soft yellow light illuminating the room suddenly. You both wince as your eyes adjust, blinking rapidly before looking at each other. His mouth drops, making your head tilt. "Something wrong?" "Babe. Are you serious?"
His voice is whiny, paired with the splotchy cheeks and swollen lips from his crying. You furrow your brow in confusion, feeling his hands tighten on your hips. "What? Did I do something wrong?" "Be so fucking serious with me right now. Look at what you're wearing." He huffs, pulling at one of your belt loops. You glance down at your outfit, a form-fitting black pinstripe suit you hadn't worn in a few years. It had a matching vest, one you paired with a white button down underneath. You'd worn your white Hot Chicks, much to the dismay of your poor feet. "Do I look bad?" You ask softly, glancing at yourself in the mirror when he gets your attention by pulling at your belt buckle. "Are you kidding me? You look fucking amazing! You haven't worn this in ages, where the hell did you find it?" "You could've started with that! You had me thinking I did something wrong!" You huff, swatting at his shoulder as his fingers fiddle with the buttons of your vest. "I'm sorry, but you really caught me off guard. Fuck, have these always fit like this?" He runs his hands down the back of your thighs, and you feel your cheeks heat slightly as you shove his hands off you.
"Stop feeling me up and come eat dinner. We have things to do before we can turn in for the night." You remind him as you turn around to walk out of the bedroom when you feel his fingers pinch the swell of your ass. You reach behind you and smack his hand away, "Stop it!" "Fine, fine. Let meâŠget cleaned up I guess. I feel gross." He groans, rolling his eyes as he slides off the bed. You make your way to the kitchen without any more of Heeseung's touching, and you carefully plate everything up. You know he'd be content just eating on the couch with a show on, but you need something to busy yourself as your mind whirls with the idea of calling Chaeyoung's parents.
What would you even say? "Nice to meet you, now let me tell you all about how I betrayed your daughter when she came to me for therapy!" You groan, running your hands through your hair as you overwhelm yourself with thoughts. You thought you'd be fine, but you sort of thank your stars that you managed to make it through work without thinking about it. You'd rather be home and agonizing over it than anywhere else.
In all your thinking, you don't hear Heeseung walk into the kitchen. Your head is low between your shoulders as you hold onto the sink, taking deep breaths. You jolt when you feel his hand on your back, a concerned look in his eyes. "Are you okay?" "Yeah, fine. Sorry, justâŠthinking." You sigh, before pushing off the sink. He gives you a stern look, his hands moving to your waist to pull you into him. âTalk to me.â
You gently bang your forehead against his chest, âWhat are we even going to tell them?â
A low whistle comes from your husbandâs lips, âI have no idea. Promise to still think Iâm sexy if I break down?â
You snort, slapping his chest lightly as he smiles down at you. âEmotional vulnerability is sexy, Hee.â
âYou want me so bad.â He chides, making you roll your eyes. You try not to let your eyes linger on the muscle of his arms, now showcased by a sleeveless white shirt he must've changed into. âLetâs eat dinner and Iâll take care of whatever hornball issue you have later.â
âWill you keep the suit on?â He asks, brow raised as he scans your face. You rub your temples, before feigning an annoyed sigh. âYes, Heeseung, Iâll keep the suit on.â
âHave I ever told you how much I love you?â He smiles as you try to weasel your way out of his arms, but he holds you tightly. He pins you against the sink, his hand moving to hold your face gently. The tip of his nose touches yours slightly, the same electricity that skin-to-skin contact with your husband causes runs down your spine. âHave I?â
âYouâre going to wax poetic after I said Iâd keep the suit on to get you off?â You snort, and he rolls his eyes. âIâm going to wax poetic after my wife agrees to some weird shit I ask of her simply because she loves me as I love her.â
You struggle not to roll your eyes, but your warming cheeks give you away. "Please focus on the order of events, will you? Dinner, dreaded call, then whatever freak shit you have in your head. Move it." He grins as he presses a kiss to your forehead, before letting you worm out of his grasp. Dinner is quiet, with neither of you wanting to talk too much in detail about your days. Heeseung would know you were so stressed that you skipped lunch, and you'd know that he'd had to change his pillowcase twice because of how long he'd been crying. It wasn't something either of you wanted to share, but simultaneously, you both knew. "Do you think they'll be happy?" You murmur around a breadstick, a pout on your husband's lips as he chews. "I meanâŠI would hope so. Mrs. Cha lost her mind when she disappeared." "Define lost her mind."Â
He sighs, taking a sip of his water. "I guess the same way I did, but worse. The first year had to have been the worst. No sleep, she barely ate and was having constant breakdownsâŠbut it's different. A mother's love is nothing compared to what I may have felt then." He shrugs, and you find yourself humming in response.
Your eyes are downcast, pushing the remaining pasta around on your plate as he gazes at you. "I'm sorry to have put you through that." "Do you remember our vows? I'd promised I'd be there, always." You say pointedly, and he shakes his head. "I mean, through what happened on Friday. I will never stop apologizing for any of it, I know that in my heart. That day was just too much for you, I saw it in the way you looked at her. She hurt your feelings." "Calling me a bitch is hardly hurting my feelings, I've heard far worse." You snort, but Heeseung leans slightly across the table. "You know that's not what I'm talking about, honey. You're great at your job, you have to know that."
You sigh, "I know, I even had a patient today tell me I helped her a lot and it made me feel really nice. But, I will admit it was a dumb move to keep Chaeyoung as a patient. I should have told her from the get-go who I was and what I knew, and then maybe Friday would've gone differently. If at all, you know." "It's too late to think about what we should have done. We can only look forward, and unfortunately that means we have to make that call to her parents." He slumps in his chair, closing his eyes. "What if I cry?" "Then you cry, honey." You shrug, "I'll be here anyway. We're doing this together." Nothing more is said as the two of you clean up, opting to brush your teeth to remove the taste of the garlic from your tongues. You find yourself reapplying your lipstick, wiping the corners of your lips as you cap the wine red wax. Heeseung sits on the couch with his phone in his hand as you retrieve the file from your purse. He sighs as you walk over, your thigh brushing his as you sit next to him. "Ready?" You ask softly, your fingers flicking the file open. Heeseung sighs inwardly as he dials the number he's known by heart since he was a kid. You drape your leg over his to feel him closer, his hand sliding around your upper thigh as the line rings.
"Cha Residence, Seonmi speaking."Â
The woman's voice is tired, and Heeseung squeezes his eyes shut as he speaks. "Hi, Mrs. Cha. It's uhmâŠit's Heeseung." The line is quiet for a moment, before a gentle sigh is heard. "Hi, sweetheart. Long time." "I know, I'm sorry." He mumbles, earning a soft laugh from her. "Nothing to be sorry for. Are you alright? How's your wife?"
"She's good. She's here, actually. Would you like to say hello?" He holds the phone towards you, and you clear your throat as you say a soft hello. "Oh, hello! Wow, I've never heard you speak, I've only seen photos of you. How are you? Heeseung treating you well, I hope?" You feel your cheeks heat as you respond, "Yeah, yes ma'am. I'm okay, how are you?" "Oh, you know. Same old, struggling. Did you guys need something from me? Maybe something of Soyoung's?" She sounds so tired, it makes your heart ache.
"Actually, we called with an update. If you're in the headspace to hear it." Heeseung says shakily, and you find yourself pressing a kiss to his cheek, stamping your lipstick on his skin. He leans into your lips, and you brush another in the same place before leaning your head on his shoulder.
"Oh, boy. Another sighting, I assume?" Mrs. Cha sounds defeated, and you can hear the clicking of a keyboard in the distance. You clear your throat, and Heeseung holds the phone to you. "I think it's better if my wife tells you." "Sweetheart, please get on with it."
You take the phone gingerly, clearing your throat. "For starters, I'm a therapist in the next town over. I started that job a few weeks back, and I've been taking new patients. Your daughter was one of them." Nothing is heard on the other end, and Heeseung gives you a nod to keep talking. His hand squeezes around your thigh, and you speak again. "She's changed her name, and she's married. IâŠshe talked about everything that led to her disappearance as well as everything going on in her life currently. She's well, and she's established."
"SoâŠyou found her?" You hear a soft sob from the other end, your own eyes stinging. "We did. She talked a lot about Heeseung, so I didn't tell her we were married. I drove her to the precinct on Friday to see him again for the first time since she disappeared, and it did not go well, to say the least. However, she did give us permission to share her information with you, and I've got everything in front of me if you've got a pen or something to jot it down." You hear the rustling of paper and pens knocking against each other as someone talks in the background. Mrs. Cha sniffles into the phone, "Go ahead. I'm ready." You read everything out to her, spelling street names and offering to send photos over as well. "And you're sure it's her? You know it?" Mrs. Cha's voice is shaky as you hear a chair get pushed back, and Heeseung replies, "Positive. We wouldn't have called if we weren't sure, I was in denial when Y/N told me." "Do youâŠshould I call her? I know she's angry with me, she must be." Mrs. Cha sounds distant, like she's walking somewhere. "She may be angry, but I'm sure she wouldn't have allowed us to give you her information if she didn't want you to contact her or know of her reappearance." You say gently, and hear Mrs. Cha laugh through her presumed tears.
"You chose the right profession, Y/N. I can see how easily this comes to you."Â
Heeseung's eyes widen as he looks down at you, your own lips spread in a shy smile. His eyes speak for themselves â See? Told you.
"Thank you." You murmur, and Heeseung squeezes your leg as he clears his throat. "Well, that's all we really called for. Feel free to keep us updated, we'll get all the paperwork for the case figured out. We can handle our end privately, but you can choose how to go about things on your end." "Thank you, sincerely. I know the last nine years have been grueling for you as well, Heeseung. I hope you know you'll always have a place in our family and our hearts, and you're welcome in our home any time. You as well, Y/N. We'd love to have you over for dinner."
You gape as Heeseung answers gently, saying he'll figure out some dates and get back to her. She agrees, and a soft take care is whispered from your husband before he hangs up.
He leans forward to put his phone and Chaeyoung's file on the coffee table, before sighing. You rest your arm against the back of the couch, smushing your cheek with the heel of your palm. He slumps against the cushions silently, his hand slinking up and down your thigh.
"Feel better? This was somehow under and overwhelming." "Weight off my fucking shoulders, I'll tell you that much." He huffs, rubbing his face in frustration. You hum, reaching to run your fingers through his hair as he turns his head to face you, a pout on his lips. "Why does everything have to suck?" "Does everything suck?" You repeat thoughtfully, looking around your living room. "I mean, consider the good things. We've got this wonderful home, we have our health and your family. We have our jobs. Job market is garbage, you know." He sighs, looking around the room. "Now I just sound ungrateful." You snort, before pushing yourself up and straddling his lap, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. You settle high on his thighs, his hands instinctively coming to rest on your hips. "You're not ungrateful, you're just going through the motions. I honestly thought you'd be worse. That's why this all seems so underwhelming to me, I thought it would be a much bigger ordeal, that you'd be excited to see her." "I would have been, if it weren't for the fact that she left at her own will. A part of me just wishes she would have fucking said something, I could've talked to her. Or her parents, or something, you know?" He's frustrated as you nod, thumbing the lobe of his ear. "Oh, but you can't save everyone. You're only human. I know that's one of the first fates you face when you do the kind of work you do." He huffs, "I just have questions that I won't ever get answers to. It bothers me because no matter what she does or says, it just feels like betrayal over and over again. If we pile the fact that she said all those shitty things to you, it just makes me hate her more."
"Hating people is so taxing, baby." You shrug, "It's not good for the spirit, or your hairline." "Keep making jokes about my hairline, see how that works out for you." He scoffs, making you scrunch your nose at him. "I've been making jokes about your hairline since we met, I think it's worked out just fine. I have this house, I have this couchâŠ" You trail off as you lean closer, brushing your nose with his, his eyes wide as he looks up at you. "I have you, on this couch, in this house and your signature on a paper that says you're my husband. What does that say about you?" "That I like gorgeous women in suits who make fun of me, I guess." He shrugs, his hands squeezing your hips as you brush your lips against his. You move away as he tries to connect your lips, making him roll his eyes. "Just kiss me, will you?" "Is that how we get the things we want?" You pull back, your brow raised as he sighs. This was a game you liked to play every once in a while, knowing that Heeseung easily flustered when you took charge. He reveled in it, sure, but it definitely took him a bit to accept that you called the shots.
"Babe, come on." "Hm, I don't like that answer." Shrugging, you start moving off his lap, earning a groan as he uses his strength to hold your hips flush to his. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please kiss me, I need it." "You need it?" You scoff, your hands on his shoulders as he blushes, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips. "I need you."
"Yeah? Need me where?" Your eyes look at him expectantly, feeling him shift under you with nerves, looking down. Your gaze doesn't waver as you tilt his chin back up, his eyes full of lust and adoration. "Where?" "Here." His cheeks flushed impossibly deeper as he pouted up at you, moving your fingertips to his lips. He kisses the pads of your fingers, making you coo as you press your lips to the tip of his nose. He chases your lips as you plant kisses around his entire face, stamping your lipstick on his skin carefully. "Baby, please."Â
"I love you." You murmur against his lips, making his eyes flutter shut as you finally kiss him. His hands move to your waist, pulling your chest flush to his as you shrug off your suit jacket, tossing it to the side as you gently lick into his mouth. He groans into your mouth, his fingers flexing against your body as you suck on the tip of his tongue. His hips rut up against you slowly, a whine from your throat making you pull away, dragging your lips down his jaw.Â
"Can I take care of you, baby?" You murmur against the shell of his ear, making him shiver as you nip at the lobe, a quiet please from his throat. His hands twitch at your sides, soft whines from his lips as you trail your tongue down the slope of his neck. You feel his fingers move to fumble with the buttons of your vest, before he untucks your shirt, sliding his hands slightly under it to feel the heat of your skin against his.Â
"I love you so much." He mumbles as you kiss his swollen lips again chastely, your fingers undoing your shirt buttons as he watches your face with low eyes. His hands snake higher on your stomach, before the tips of fingers brush your bare breasts. His eyes widen as he pulls away, jaw falling slack as he sees your lack of undergarments. "Baby." "Just enjoy it." You roll your eyes, shivering as he runs his thumbs over your pebbled nipples. He leans forward slightly, before your hand cards through his hair. "This is not about me." "You said enjoy it. How can I, if you don't let me?" He scoffs, moving your hand from its spot on the nape of his neck, pulling you forward into his mouth. His tongue swirls expertly around the hardened nub, your hand finding and digging into the back of the couch. Heeseung feels his head spinning as he breathes you in, the soft scent of his favorite perfume on your skin. You groan quietly as your hips roll against his, a soft fuck from your lips as he carefully drags his teeth on the sensitive bud. He moves to the other side, your hand tangling in his hair again as he plants wet kisses across your chest. "So perfect for me." He murmurs, flattening his tongue against your nipple as his hands move to undo your belt. He pulls it through the loops within seconds, tossing it aside and palming your ass over your pants, moving you over his bulge slowly. He relishes in the sounds you make, whimpers from your throat making his cock twitch in his pants as he continues to lap at your chest. "Always so fucking beautiful. You make me insane."
You whine in response, pulling his head away from your chest and reconnecting your lips. He feels your hand snake down between your bodies, palming at his hardened cock through his sweatpants. He groans into your mouth, his hips rutting into your hand involuntarily. You slip your tongue in his mouth, letting him messily kiss you back as he tangles a hand in your hair â your own beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging at them gently. He obliges, lifting his hips for you to pull them down to his knees. You pull away from his lips as much as the hand in your hair will allow, your hand wrapping around his leaking cock gently. He shudders as you stroke him, whining against your lips when you pull his hand out of your hair, sliding off his lap and settling between his knees. He lets out a breath as you glance up at him through thick lashes, before pressing a kiss to his inner thigh. His hands move back to your hair, gathering it into a messy ponytail as you continue to drag your lips around his skin, faint lipstick stains marking your path. He feels his stomach cave the moment you swirl your tongue around his tip, a broken moan cutting through the air.
"S'fucking pretty like thisâŠ" He groans, watching as you take him deeper, hollowing your cheeks slightly. Your tongue laps at the underside of his cock, following the thick vein as his tip hits the back of your throat. Gagging around him, you feel his hips jerk up involuntarily, a murmured apology as you pull off, shaking your head. "Want it, want you to do that."Â
Your ears are watery as you look up at him, your hand wrapped around his shaft as his lips parted in a soft grunt. He wipes his thumb across your lower lip before he takes his cock in his hand, "Beautiful."
You feel your cheeks flush, not responding to the compliment as he opens your mouth for you. You stick out your tongue, making him smirk as he slides the heavy head of his cock on it. You blink up at him before you sink down on him, hearing a soft sigh fall from his lips. He rocks his hips up slowly, throwing his head back with a whimper as you gag around him.
"Feel s'fucking good, baby. Love you so much, fuckâŠ" You feel your skin prickle at the praise, your eyes brimming with tears as the tip of his cock brushes the back of your throat, a groan making him shiver. "Always so good to meâŠ"
You hum as best as you can, feeling his hand tighten in your hair as the tell-tale whimper falls from your husband's lips. He pulls you off almost reluctantly, staring up at the ceiling and biting down on his lip as you look up at him, seeing his chest move in shallow breaths. "Heeâ" "Need to feel you." He pulls you off your knees by your wrists, making you slide your knee between his for balance. His lips feel frantic as he kisses you messily, groaning at the slight taste of himself inside your mouth as you try to keep up. "Need to cum inside you, baby." His lips ghost over yours as he unbuttons your slacks, your teeth nipping at his bottom lip as he hooks his thumbs into the belt loops. You let him tug them down, stepping out of them when he snaps the waistband of your underwear against your skin. "Take it off." "What, do you want me to strip for you?" You roll your eyes, and he smirks lightly. "We can spin that back another time. Take it off." You oblige, feeling your husband's hands wrap around your thighs as you kick your underwear off to the side. He pulls you forward, instinctively making you straddle him slightly before he looks up, his hand snaking between your thighs. "Do you needâ"
You shake your head quickly as he glides his fingers through your wet folds, his eyes widening as you shiver. He holds his hand up to the light, your arousal stringy between his fingers, gathering around his wedding band. He peers up at you, "Really?" "Shut up." Your cheeks burn as he scoffs out a laugh, before running his tongue over his fingers. "All fours, please." He tilts his head towards the free space on the couch, your eyes narrowing as you do as he says, hearing the thwip of his shirt being pulled over his head.Â
"You know," You mumble as you settle on your elbows, "This is not-ah!" The warm feeling of Heeseung's tongue on your clit makes you jolt, and you feel him smile into your skin as his hands rest on your hips. He groans as you push your hips against his face, your fingers digging into the couch cushion as you whine into the brown suede. "So fucking wet, for what? A little kissing?" He's talking down to you, amused at the way your pussy clenches around his tongue, your whimper muffled by your shirt sleeve, "I love you." "Yeah? My messy girl loves me?" His voice is clearer now, and you feel his hand grip your hip as he drags the tip of his cock through your folds with a hiss. You push back against him with a whine, earning a firm smack to the back of your thigh. "Behave. You can wait."
You can hear him mutter under his breath as he ruts against you, his breathing shaky as he holds you steady. You feel him sink inside you slowly, the wet squelch making your cheeks burn in embarrassment as you whimper at the stretch. "I know honey, I know." Heeseung's voice is almost goading as he rocks into you slowly, biting down on his lip as you clench around him. "You take me so well, baby. Just love this dick, huh?" He holds your hips tight as you nod, your voice lost on you as he brushes that spongy spot inside you. You're pliant in his hands, your eyes rolling back when you feel his hand come down on your ass sharply, a moan falling from your lips into the cushion.
"Filthy little thing." He mutters, running his hand over the reddened skin. "Love being treated like a slut, don't you?" His fingers move to hold onto your waist, hearing you mumble something before leaning down slightly. "Don't you?" "Yours. Your slut." You mumble as you nod shyly, the duality making his chest ache as he coos. "All mine, yeah? Get this wet for me only, right?" The sound of your soft moans is almost drowned out by the smack of his hips against your ass.Â
"Always feel so good around me, baby, shit.." His hand tangles in your hair, pulling you up carefully. You whimper as your back hits his chest, your hand holding onto the back of the couch as he bullies his cock into you. He feels you clamp down around him, your skin hot to the touch as he slides his hand down, circling your clit with his fingers.
"Always take such good care of me, my gorgeous girl. My wife, fuck, I love you." He mutters into your neck, his eyes catching your earrings swinging as he nips at your skin. You whine inwardly, looking away from him as you clench around him, your orgasm on the tip of your tongue as he thrusts into you.Â
His hand moves from your hair to cradle your face, turning you just slightly to see the fucked out glaze in your eyes, your lips swollen and slick with spit. He smiles softly, brushing his lips over yours, "I love you."
You close your eyes as he kisses you messily, nothing but teeth and tongue as your orgasm washes over you, a whiny moan into your husband's mouth. He carefully tugs off your vest and shirt, "Just a little more baby, almost there. Gonna fill you up, yeah?" "Y-Yeah." You whimper as he lets you fall forward slowly, your trembling thighs only egging him on as he runs his hands over your bare back. "So fucking perfect. S-Such a perfect woman, could never ask for anyone better. M-My angel, my everything." He's rambling, forcing himself to focus as he overstimulates you chasing his orgasm. You mewl into the cushion relentlessly, pushing against him when he notices you holding your hand out behind your back. He interlocks your fingers, before spilling inside you with a whimper. He shudders above you, your hand squeezing his gently before you let go. He digs his fingers into your hips deeply, earning a groan as you shakily try to sit up on your elbows. You only manage to push back on him, a choked moan ringing through the air as he grabs at your hips. He winces as he pulls out carefully, his eyes glued to the way you clench around nothing with soft breaths. His fingers ghost over your hole as you push his release out, not realizing how sensitive you are as he smears it all over your glistening folds. "H-Heeseung!" You reach back to swat at him, making his eyes snap up to look at you. He smiles sheepishly, apologizing under his breath as he wipes his fingers on his shirt.Â
"You okay?" He murmurs, his cheeks aflame as he realizes how spent you are, your hips almost giving out as he holds you up. You give him a tired nod, "We cannot fuck on my precious couch again. People sit here." He scoffs, and you feel the soft cotton of his shirt wiping down your legs. You feel him shift behind you, flinching when you feel his shirt wiping between your thighs. "Can't we just shower?" "We can, but I can't lieâŠI kind of like watching it drip out." He admits quietly, and you roll your eyes. "I feed so many of your guilty pleasures, but this is one I'm going to cut short. I'm all sticky." "I can make you stickier, if you want." He runs his hands up your thighs, and you scoff as you use your remaining strength to flip yourself onto your back. He's red in the face, and not just from your lipstick, his eyes glued to your center. "Hee, stop. You fucking freak." "This fucking freak is your husband, I'd be nicer to me if I were you. I suggest you tell me you love me, that's a pretty good start." He shrugs, acting nonchalant as he leans down. You give him an amused look as you run your fingers through his hair, "And I married you, why?" "Because I'm tall, tan, young, lovely." He shrugs, making you snort. "Girl from Ipanema, is that you?" "I love you." He wrinkles his nose as you press a soft kiss to it, his hands carefully moving your hair out of your eyes. "Thank you. I didn't realize how much I needed this. How much IâŠneed you. I'm sorry it's taken me this long, baby." Your cheeks warm at his confession, your thumbs gently stroking his cheeks. "I love you. I'm always here when you need a little TLC." "And when I don't?" "And when I do, and when I don't. Whenever, you know I'm here." You assure softly, his eyes slightly glazed over as you press a chaste kiss to his lips. "However, I will admitâŠmy TLC of preference right now is a hot shower. Care to join me?" "You and your hot showers. Can you even stand up?"
"If I can't, it just means you can eat me out in the shower." You shrug, seeing the wheels turn in your husband's head as he locks your legs around his waist. A shriek falls from your lips as he picks you up, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as he moves towards the bathroom with a kiss to your lips. "And suddenly, I too, love hot showers. Shall we?"
Tuesday, 12:33pm.
It'd been a few weeks since you and Heeseung reached out to the Cha family, and the case had been officially declared closed by the Seventh Precinct. However, such a reappearance after so many years for such a prolific family meant many, many interviews and involvement with the press. It meant seeing Chaeyoung and her husband, as well as her family over and over again, even when it came to things that weren't about her.
Your relationship was still not perfect â with you and Heeseung slowly working through your issues, things got easier. He managed to submit the paperwork for his vacation to start on Friday, and had some final things to settle at the Seoul Central District Court with a few attorneys involved in a case he and Jay were attempting to break into. He'd called you to meet him and Sunoo for lunch and a meeting to bring you on as an expert witness, as you had a short day in the office.
Short day in the office does not warrant a short day outside of it, though â and you found your husband crowded by reporters and flashing cameras as you tried to quietly make your way into the courthouse. You hoped they wouldn't see you â Heeseung had been pissed enough already when a few reporters dragged your name through the mud when Chaeyoung gave her side of the story, pictures of you that he loved now torn to shreds by internet trolls and what little social media you did have had been flooded with hateful comments. You wound up deleting everything, and staying away from your phone as much as possible. Heeseung arranged private security, and even had Sunghoon assigned to keep an eye out for any suspicious activity around you.Â
Nothing had happened, and you were sure nothing would â but you couldn't lie, you felt safer when you and Heeseung were behind the locked doors of your home, hidden away in your bedroom.
You could hear the reporters shouting questions at Heeseung, the tick in his jaw evident as he answered one question at a time. You watch from afar a bit, your facemask protecting you from being discovered as you inch closer. You can see his patience begin to thin and you're about to barrel down the steps to him when you hear a reporter shout over all the others.
"Lieutenant, your wife has been dragged by the media in all forms. What are your thoughts on that, considering that Jeon Chaeyoung was once your life-long friend?" Heeseung's face hardens, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as he speaks.
"I have nothing to say on Mrs. Jeon, I cannot understand why she'd speak about Dr. Lee that way. Please write that down, put that into the world. She's not just my wife, she's her own person and she had a huge role in this case. I would have lost my mind if it weren't for her, and her impact should not be reduced simply because we're married." You feel your chest fill with warmth as you take a few more steps down, a reporter spotting you and you press a finger to your facemask, your wedding ring making her eyes widen. She says nothing as you listen to Heeseung speak.
"Dr. Lee was a pertinent witness to the entire case, and had she not been involved, had she not said something, Mrs. Jeon's case would've remained open and no one would know of her whereabouts. Her family had been in absolute shambles for the last nine years, and frankly, as harsh as it sounds, I'm glad that it's finally over. Dr. Lee is not to blame for whatever upset feelings Mrs. Jeon may have, or whatever resentment she may have towards myself. If she wants to drag anyone through the dirt, she might as well drag me. Dr. Lee is entirely innocent in this, she was a huge stepping stone in bridging crucial pieces of information together and restoring the Cha family. In other words, keep my wife's name out of your mouth unless you're praising her. I'm tired of hearing this, so I have nothing more to say on the matter."
Your eyes are wide as he shrugs, before the reporter who spotted you makes a few moves up the steps, trying not to alert anyone else. You tilt your head at her, and she quietly steps up to you. She holds her recorder up slightly, and you nod, beckoning her closer with your hand.
"Dr. Lee, how do you feel about Lieutenant Lee coming to your defense amongst the influx of hate from netizens?" You lean down to her to speak into the small microphone, clearing your throat. "I think Lieutenant Lee is one of the most kind-hearted, driven, loving people in my life. There's a reason he's my husband, you know. I couldn't ask for a better man." The reporter's eyes soften as Heeseung turns around, bidding the reporters a goodbye as he buttons his coat up, trekking back up the stairs. He looks up, his eyes meeting yours as you give him a little wave. He walks up to you, giving the reporter a curt nod before slipping his fingers in yours.Â
The reporter gives you a soft thank you, before walking down the steps. You let Heeseung guide you up the steps, and glance over your shoulder to see reporters taking photos of the two of you from behind. You nudge him with your elbow, and he looks down at you. "Yes?" "Kiss me." You tilt your head towards the reporters, and he snorts as the two of you reach the doors. "You sure?" "Positive." You nod as you pull your mask off, the camera flashes almost blinding as they watch you press your lips to Heeseung's, his arm wrapping around your waist as his hand cradles your cheek. Your lipstick stains his mouth as you pull away, and you give the reporters a cheeky thumbs up as he pulls you into the courthouse.
Sunoo's eyes are wide as you walk into his quarters with Heeseung, your lipstick now also stamped on his cheek from a kiss you gave him in the hallway. He smiles warmly as you offer a hug, embracing you tightly. "God, it's so nice to see you in love." He murmurs into your hair, patting your back before you all take a seat at his desk. The three of you are going over the options for lunch when you hear a knock at the door, your head whipping around to see your mother entering the office. Your eyes widen, and Heeseung is up before you know it. He's greeting her warmly, her face remaining stoic as he takes her coat. She looks tired, and you stand on shaky legs.
"Hello, Mother." You say softly, your eyes flickering to Heeseung and Sunoo as they stand to the side. She steps in front of you, her eyes scanning you carefully. You wince as she steps slightly closer, only for her to breathe out softly.
"I wanted to speak to you earlier this week, amidst everything in the media. However, I'm too prolific and I worried I'd be followed to your home, so I left a few messages on your answering machine. I assume you didn't receive them, so is now a good time?" She's still professional, your mother had no idea how to be comforting or warm. You nod slowly, shoving your trembling hands into your coat. "S-Sure. Yeah, we can talk." Your mother had never cared who was around when she spoke to you about anything. It was one of the more mortifying things about her, but she made up for it by keeping her voice quiet enough that only you could hear her.
"May I touch you?" She asks with a twinge in her voice you'd never heard, and you nod slowly. "Okay." She doesn't wait for another second, throwing her arms around you as she pulls you into a tight embrace. Your eyes are wide as you look at Heeseung and Sunoo, their own the size of saucers as you awkwardly wrap your arms around her. "Are youïżœïżœïżœalright?" "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I read everything that you said in your interviews, about Chaeyoung and her reasons behind leaving, and how deeply you understood her dilemma. I never realized I was pushing you away, and I'm incredibly sorry if I ever made you feel like I wasn't supportive of your dreams or career choices. I know that this may be a too little, too late sort of situation, but I couldn't let more time go by without letting you know how proud I am of you and everything you've accomplished, not just as a professional but as a woman, as my daughter, as a wife."
Your eyes are stinging with tears as Heeseung's jaw drops, your mother pulling back to cup your face in her hands. "And I'll sue that little bitch for all she has for dragging you through the mud. I'll do it, I'll wring her dry of every asset she's ever acquired."
Her eyes are full of tears as you gape at her, before she presses a kiss to your forehead. "I love you so much, darling. I'm so, so sorry."
"Mom-" "I'm so glad to have you, darling. Please don't disappear on me, I promise you I cannot handle it." You let her pull you back into her embrace, the tears streaming down your cheeks before she pulls away quickly. "Alright, I've got a meeting I'm running late to. I just saw you in the window and I needed to pop in and talk to you. As you were, I'll give you a call later." She gives the three of you a curt nod, before taking her coat and skirting back out of Sunoo's office.
The three of you are silent, your arms wrapped around yourself as you cover your mouth with your hand. You don't wipe your tears as they stream down, and you look up at the men staring at you in shock. "She said she's proud of me." You whine suddenly, and Heeseung lets out a soft laugh as you walk into his embrace, Sunoo smiling to himself as Heeseung strokes your hair, sharing a glance with his long-time friend as you sob into his shirt. "Oh, my baby. You deserve all that and more."
"Should we push the meeting? I think we've got a lot of big feelings to work out, Dr. Lee." Sunoo speaks up gently, and you pout as Heeseung agrees before you can say anything. You mumble out an apology, but Sunoo shakes his head, waving you off. "Let me lead you out the backway, those reporters would have a ball with your crying face."
"Shut up, Sunoo." You scoff, making him snicker as he leads you both out of his office, your head bowed as you let Heeseung hide you from onlookers. You both quietly thanked Sunoo as he opened the door for you and bid you farewell, saying he'd try and get everything done before Heeseung's allotted vacation time. They agreed to meet again on Thursday, with Sunoo giving your shoulder a soft squeeze.
"Give yourself some more credit, Y/N. You deserve it."
Saturday, 4:44pm.
"You found it? You look so beautiful, holy shit." Heeseung was laid on the bed, held up by his elbows as you stood in front of the mirror, a quizzical look on your face as you clipped in your earrings. You purse your lips, turning to face him, the sarong skirt of the dress he'd made you swinging slightly.
"You sure? It's not tooâŠshowy?" You pout, running your hands over the soft white fabric. You'd dug this dress back out specifically for this occasion, renewing your vows with your husband on a simple vacation in the middle of nowhere. By middle of nowhere, you mean the same field he proposed to you in, two hours out of Seoul and likely full of flowers this time of year.
"Baby, it's just you and me. You can be as showy as you want in your dress, as bummy as you want in your sweatpants. You're fucking angelic." He pulls you to him by your hips, "I did great on this hem, you can't lie." "Wonderful, yes." You roll your eyes, feeling his hands snake under the skirt. You allow it, feeling your cheeks warm as he snaps the waistband of your underwear against your hip. "Let me go down on you." You sigh, rubbing your temples as your husband presses a kiss to your cleavage. "Heeseung, the sun is going to set and we're going to be doing this in the dark." "Can I go down on you after?" He questions, not really paying attention as he stands, his hands low on your back as he pulls you to him. "Heeseung." "Two orgasms, right after we're done, on the hood of my car." He offers, making you snort. "One orgasm, after we're done, in the backseat." "I'll take it!" He presses a chaste kiss to your lips, making you giggle as he lands a soft smack to your ass. "Stop it!" "You love me! Now get your cute ass in the car, we've got shit to do."
And it feels easy. It feels light, sitting next to Heeseung as he pulls out of the driveway with one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding your fingers tightly. It feels good, listening to your husband sing along softly to soft jazz songs on the radio before you plug in your phone, and then hearing him sing along to your playlists. It feels like getting a breath of fresh air when you see the afternoon sunlight beaming on his skin, his white shirt reflecting the light painfully into your eyes. It feels like the way your heart starts beating a little faster when you catch a whiff of his spicy cologne, your eyes falling on him with a soft smile. It feels like an emotional orgasm when he times playing No Song Without You by HONNE perfectly to when you arrive, your pout being kissed off frantically by your attentive, doting husband. It feels like falling in love when he holds you close, pressing his lips anywhere you'd allow him to as you both reach into your pockets for the thick packets of words you've written. It feels like falling in love when he goes off script, holding the papers in his hand as he looks into your eyes. It feels like falling in love when he kisses your tears off your face as you tell him how much you appreciate his changes, it feels like falling in love when he says you should never thank him for doing what's right. It feels like falling in love, when he pulls a box out of his pocket and presents yet another gold ring to add to your set, with your initials engraved on the outside.
It feels like falling in love with he suggests you both pick flowers from the field to press when you get home. It feels like falling in love when he holds your hand and pulls you close when you've wandered too far, it feels like falling in love when he's kissing you against the hood of his car. It feels like falling in love when he carries you into the backseat and you wind up naked in his lap, a whining and writhing mess as he tells you how pretty you are, how much he loves you, how bad he wants to get you pregnant so everyone knows you're his. It feels like falling in love, when on the ride home, he can't keep his hands off you.
It feels like falling in love, when he wastes no time getting you in the bedroom, your dress on the floor with his shirt and pants. It feels like falling in love when he draws a bath for the two of you, it feels like falling in love when he tells you I love you as he washes your hair, your body, your face.
It feels like falling in love again, but this time? You don't feel like you're falling alone.
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NSFW Sevika HCs
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A/n: i haven't written any smut in god knows how long so pls go easy yall đ
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This is a dom
I love indulging in the bottom!sevika content when i come across it, it's beautiful, showstopping
But bby, you only get to do what she lets you do. Even when she's on bottom, you're never really the one in charge, no matter how you might try to convince yourself
She's a terrible tease, and has an absolutely filthy mouth. Loves watching your jaw drop slightly when she whispers things in public, and how you scramble to gather yourself
Her self-control and patience is absolutely insane. She's not one to jump your pants at the first tease you give her.
She'll let you have her fun, all while running the tip of her tongue across a canine and plotting her revenge
Gets a big head/ego if you call her mommy. Nearly loses her mind and reputation for restraint if you call her daddy
A lot of her turn-ons are things that aren't inherently sexual. I like to think she's attracted to both masc and fem-presenting people, and anything leaning deeper into these characteristics will get a rise out of her.
Ex.'s -> watching you put on makeup in the mornings, specifically lipstick/gloss. Conversely, how your thighs look and your face hardens when you manspread while striking a deal. When you look up at her and rest your hands on her chest. When you lean back and rest your arm over the back of her chair
Particularly masculine and particularly feminine things. She eats up both
Absolutely a bit of a sadist/madochist. We know this from the whole cait thing
She's obsessed with your mouth in particular. The marks you leave, the shapes it makes with certain sounds she pulls from you, how your lips wrap around her fingers when she teases your mouth open with them
She rarely ever has you on your back because she wants to watch your tongue loll and your eyes roll
Goes crazy for certain things you say when you start to reach melted brain levels of fucked out; "baby, it's too muchâŠ" "Sevi, i can't keep going" "no, baby, no moreâŠ" it's like a second wave. And, (always) only with your emphatic consent, she'll proceed to push your body even more
Her favorite position is missionary i'm sorry lmfao. Vanilla in theory, but definitely doesn't feel like it when she's slinging that shimmerstrap LOL
I HC she's generally pretty gentle with you, at least lovesick!sevika is. In the sense that she's not tossing you around or slapping your ass purple.
Rather, she'll wrap her hand around your throat but not really squeeze. And she'll push her fingers down your throat until you're teary-eyed, but she won't fuck your throat until it's raw and sore.
She prefers using her hands and her mouth, but her strap game is insane. That stroke would be hypnotic to watch.
Her eyes read clearly when it comes to intimacy. The way they darken and narrow when she's about to pounce on you, and how they always get so glossy and self-satisfied (if not a bit smug) as she watches you cum.
Her crows feet crease as she smiles down at you, whispering "good job, baby" and "there's my girl, you're okay. I've got you."
Always insists on taking care of you afterwards, but won't fight you on it if you flip it on her and make her lay back so you can clean her up
In fact, please do this. She'll think about it for weeks
Cuddles you afterward like she's trying to burrow in your skin. Can't get enough of the smell of you post-sex, burying her nose in your neck and your hair
Yeah, she's never sharing you. Everything about you is too precious, too hers.
She demands hickeys/lipstick marks on her chest- over her heart- because your claim over her deepens her own.
#arcane#sevika#arcane sevika#sevika x reader#sevika headcanon#BOOMSHAKALAKA YES GODD YES GODDD#ubebones writing
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Deal of Lust (Im Nayeon x M!Reader)
Remastered version of my first smut because it SUCKS. (I'll give Nayeon a new smut ... eventually ... maybe)
Word Count: 1,309
Walking into school you walked around with caution making sure you didn't bump into a certain someone.
You were almost to your first period class but before you reached it you were grabbed and brought into an empty classroom.
"If I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to avoid me."
"What no, I'm just really tired."
"Mhm, Anyways Y/N I trust you did my pre-calculus work."
"Actually I was studying for my exam last night so I wasn't able to finish it."
"You piece of shit!"
Nayeon smacked you and you fell to the floor. She grabbed you by your hair and lifted your head up.
"It's due today. Since you didn't finish it your going to pay."
Nayeon was about to hit you and you raised your hand in order to block her punch but before she hit you the sound of the doorknob twisting made Nayeon let go of you.
"Is there someone in here?"
The person who stepped through the door was the president of student council Park Jihyo.
"Oh Y/N you're so clumsy you have to stop falling down." Nayeon started caressing your face and helped you stand up.
"What are you guys doing in here?"
"Me and Y/N wanted to study on our own so we came in here. We were just about to leave but Y/N tripped and fell to the floor."
"Is this true Y/N."
You looked at Jihyo wanting to tell the truth but when you turned to look at Nayeon she gave you a "I'll kill you if you tell her." look.
"Yeah, I fell down I'm kinda clumsy like that."
"Okay well you guys can't be in a classroom without a teacher present so I'm advising you guys to go to the library if you want to study."
"Understood president Park, it won't happen again. Right Y/N?"
"R-right."
Once you all left the room Nayeon waited for Jihyo to be out of sight before she spoke to you.
"You're lucky she came in when she did. Have my homework done by 5th period or you'll regret it, got that?"
"Yes Nayeon."
She turned around and walked to her first period class leaving you in the hallway.
"Damn it why do I let myself get pushed around by her?"
Im Nayeon was the popular girl in school. Even saying that is an understatement she is what many saw as the person every student should aspire to be like. However you're the only one who knows the "real" Nayeon.
Once she realized you were the highest performing in school she started bullying you into doing her work and giving her test answers. She used the threat of beating your ass to keep you in check.
Reporting her would do nothing as everyone including staff had a false view of her and wouldn't take you seriously so you never bothered to do so.
You really wanted to finish her homework to avoid being punished but you were busy in every class. 1st period you had the exam you were studying for last night, 2nd period you had to work on a lab, 3rd period you were working on a project, and 4th period you had to help your art teacher set up for an after school event in the gym.
As the bell for fifth period came you tried to get to your class as fast as possible before Nayeon could find you. You settled for the longer path to your class assuming that Nayeon would assume you would take the shorter path to get to your class quicker.
However you didn't anticipate that she would correctly guess your actions and you saw her standing in the hallway as you turned the corner. "Oh shit!"
You tried turning around to run but before you could Nayeon grabbed you and brought you into the janitors closet.
"Where's my homework loser?"
"I don't have it!"
"Is that so? You know what happens now."
"No wait Nayeon please I'll do anything! Just please don't hit me."
"Anything I want?"
"Yes! Anything, just please don't hit me."
Nayeon grabbed your chin and made you face her. Laying your eyes on her you felt as if her demeanor changed from the one that was present just a moment earlier.
"You know Y/N there is one way you could make it up to me."
She put her fingers on the waistband of her pants and pulled her pants down.
"Wh-what are you doing?"
Once her pants were all the way down you noticed her pink pantie she was wearing but quickly averted your eyes.
"What's wrong Y/N? Do you not like what you see?"
You were unable to say to get words out of your mouth but eventually you were able to muster out a sentence "Please put your clothes back on."
"Don't be such a baby Y/N. Now look at me or I'll punish you."
Turning around to look at Nayeon you tried your best to focus on her face but you couldn't help yourself from trying to get a quick glance at her pantie.
"Go on Y/N stare at my clothed pussy." She put her finger inside her pantie and started to finger herself.
You watched her finger herself and felt your cock grow.
"Y/N if you fuck my pussy everyday then I'll stop bullying you."
"R-really?" You were surprised that her compromise was really lewd.
"Is that a yes or should I beat your face in now?"
Well who were you to deny her?
Walking up to Nayeon you pushed her to the wall and lowered yourself so you were facing her pantie.
"Go on give yourself a better view Y/N."
Putting your fingers on her pantie and dragging it down you got a clear view of Nayeon's wet pussy. Without hesitation you inserted your tongue into her pussy. She let out loud moans but covered her mouth quickly as to not draw attention to the closet both of you were in.
"Gah ~ ah ~ ah"
Hearing the noises coming from her made you want to go faster. You lapped every single inch of her pussy you could get your tongue on.
Nayeon took her shirt off and made quick work of her bra. Her breasts were now out in full display. She started to pinch and twist her nipples for further stimulation.
Pulling out of her sweet pussy you went up and kissed her letting her get a taste of herself. "Mhm ~ you're such a good kisser Y/N."
You reached for her pussy with your fingers and fingered Nayeon. She moaned into your mouth and you decided to explore her mouth with your tongue.
Nayeon felt overstimulated from everything she was experiencing and ended up cumming all over your fingers. So much cum came out that some dripped onto the floor.
"Agh ~ Y/N ... so ... good."
You licked the fluid she sprayed on your fingers: licking every last drop. "Do I taste good Y/N?"
"Yes Nayeon you taste amazing."
"Lucky for you you'll be able to taste this every day."
....
"Should we leave?"
"Probably not school staff is likely roaming the hallways looking for us since we haven't reported to our fifth period."
"So what now Nayeon?"
"We could just fuck until sixth period."
No words needed to be exchanged for her to know that you wanted to take her up on that offer.
The janitors closet was once again filled with moans for the rest of the period.
...
Jihyo was making her way to the bathroom and was passing by the janitors closet when she heard a moan. It was low but loud enough for her to hear.
She slowly crept towards it and laid on the floor to look inside from the crack under the door.
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I prefer this over what I wrote originally. I'd like to think I've improved since I started writing and hopefully that continues.
#nayeon smut#girl group smut#kpop smut#smut#twice#twice smut#twice x reader#nayeon#im nayeon#female idol smut#nayeon x reader
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đđđđđ'đ đđđđđđ - ( h. jisung. )
pairing: dilf!Han Jisung x fem!reader genre: smut, fluff, angst, strangers to lovers
words: 26.8k. summary: jisung is a father, y/n is desperate for a job and Seyeon likes her too much.
áŻáĄŁđ©ă ( masterlist ) . Spotify playlist .
warnings: dirty talks, soft!dom jisung, unprotected sex (be mindful), breeding, oral (fem receiving.)
Seyeon it's a papa's girl. She took the Jisung's cheeks, and her mother's eyes, the kindness of her father but the attitude of her mom. She always tell when she doesn't want something.
"I don't like the zoo!" Jisung sigh, at the yet another attempt to take her daughter to the big gate of the zoo, the colours of the funny animals all over the signs, making every kids gasp in happiness. On the other hand, Seyeon hates the zoo.
"why sweet cheeks? you were so happy to come here with daddy," Jisung knee down in front of her little girl, both of them pouting softly, both of them don't want to hurt the other. "it reminds me of mommy, I wanna go with mommy!â
After the separation of the two parents the situation always been really hard, Seyeon never wanted to stay with Jisung for more than two days, she doesnât like the small bit luxurious apartment that jisung as in Seoul, she loves Momâs house right in front of the ocean Incheon. She doesnât like the fact that her father as a cat, the mother as a dog. She doesnât like going around with her daddy in his studio because she canât play, she loves passing time with her mom in her painting room. They are just in two different worlds.
Thatâs why it never worked out. Jisung been always busy with his career as the most successful kpop artist in his group, when he met the mother in Japan, he thought right the way that she was the one. For years they kept the relationship private, for the amount of fanbase that Jisung was having, was making the girl uncomfortable. But they end up married. A beautiful marriage that everyone was loving, the parents accepted and the fans not totally supportive. As soon as Seyeon born, he knows something between him and her wife was breaking apart.
They started with a separation, living in two different places, and then the divorce was imminent. Seyeon at the age of five years old saw her father just twice a month, but after jisung retired from the band to start his career as a producer, he wanted to pass more time with her daughter.
Thatâs why they are at the zoo, because jisung remember that when she was three the zoo was her favourite place ever. âsweet cheeks, itâs.. just me and you today. a seyeonnie and daddy day!â He try to cheers up the little girl, making her pout just growing, but she start to walk. At the end, sheâs still a papaâs girl. And she doesn't want him to report her bad attitude to her mother.
"what do you wanna see first, princess?" Seyeon mumble an answer, that jisung doesn't understand but her little hand guide his to the big spot for the lions. The man get lost in the moment, the beautiful creatures are playing around and he grabs his phone to take some pictures of it, just as a memory.
He let his daughter's hand for a second, "do you want to take a picture for mommy babygirl?"
Jisung turns to look at his side and he can't see his little girl, he's panicking at this point. He's shouting her name, trying to find her in every spot that the little girl could hide, he's so close to grab the phone and call the police when she hear her little laugh.
Her adorable laugh. He turns so quickly to get the dizziness from it, but he doesn't care, he totally lost his daughter in the zoo. When he lands his eyes on the girl she see her playing some hand-game with another woman, Seyeon it's laughing and giggling for the mistakes that they are making and you are holding her on your lap.
"Seyeon!" He calls her out as he start to get closer to them, with a speedy walk, he almost trip as you look up at him with a surprised look. "baby, I am so sorry." Copious tears dropping from his eyes, making his puffy cheeks turning red, he lift his daughter from your lap, hugging her tight. "daddy is so sorry sweet cheeks."
"don't worry daddy! I was with y/n! she's sooo nice!" The little girl squeak in a giggle, making jisung turn his head to you, an awkward smile on your face. "hi?"
You smile softly at Jisung's awkward greeting, your eyes meeting his as the moment hangs in the air. Seyeon clings to Jisung tightly, her arms wrapping around his neck while she keeps giggling, completely unfazed by the earlier scare.
âItâs okay, Daddy,â Seyeon murmurs, her small voice soothing him. ây/nie is nice. I had fun with her.â
Jisungâs breath hitches as he holds her close. âI shouldnât have let go of your hand. I was so scared, baby.â His voice cracks slightly, the weight of the moment settling heavily on his chest.
You shift uncomfortably, unsure of how to navigate the situation. "Sheâs a really special little girl," you say softly, trying to keep the mood light. "And itâs not every day you get to see lions this close." Your words are genuine, but thereâs an unspoken tension between you and Jisung.
Seyeon glances between you both, her small fingers twirling a lock of Jisungâs hair absentmindedly. âDaddy, I like y/n,â she says matter-of-factly, her bright eyes shining with innocence. âShe paints really pretty pictures like mommy.â
Oh great, another artist, jisung thinks.
Jisung chuckles lightly, a soft smile pulling at his lips despite his earlier panic. âYouâre quite the little artist yourself, princess.â He presses a gentle kiss to the top of her head before turning to you again. âThank you for keeping her safe... and for being kind to her.â
You nod, feeling a bit more at ease despite the weight of the situation. âItâs nothing, really. Sheâs a sweet kid.â
Seyeon leans back, resting her head on Jisungâs shoulder, her little hand still firmly entwined with his. The moment feels fleeting, like something precious they donât want to let go of too soon.
âWell, I should let you two get back to your day,â you say, stepping back slightly. âShe clearly enjoys her time with you..?â
"Jisung, I'm Han Jisung," he watches you carefully, his gaze softening. âWould you... like to join us for lunch? a little reward to kept safe my little girl.â
You hesitate for a second, the offer catching you off guard, but Seyeonâs excited nod makes the decision easier. âOkay. Just for lunch.â
Seyeon claps her hands together, excited once more. âYay! I love lunch with Daddy and y/nie!â
The three of you settle at a cozy corner table in a quiet café inside the zoo. The warm glow of the late afternoon sun filters through the large windows, casting a peaceful ambiance over the scene. Seyeon sits between you and Jisung, her small hands clutching a juice box as she eagerly looks between you both.
Jisung takes a deep breath, his fingers lightly tracing the edge of the table. âI never wanted to scare you, y/n,â he says softly. His voice is quieter now, more introspective. âYou didnât have to come with us, but⊠Iâm glad you did.â
You smile softly, watching Seyeon as she drinks her juice, her little hands messy with excitement. âSheâs a bright little girl. It was hard to say no.â
Jisung chuckles quietly, his eyes lingering on his daughter. âShe gets that from her mother,â he says with a bittersweet smile. âAnd from me⊠the stubborn part.â
Seyeon giggles, her head tilting as she looks up at him. âDaddy, can we go to the park later?â
âWeâll see how youâre feeling,â Jisung replies with a wink. âYouâve had quite the adventure today already.â
Seyeon pout a little looking at you like you're in charge for this kind of things, "can you come too? please?" Jisung's eyes wide open, looking at you two before gasping a laugh, "baby I think y/n has her own things to do, don't you think?"
"What things daddy?" Her big doe eyes staring at his soul, he's always been bad at saying no to his daughter.
You watch them interact, their bond so natural, yet itâs clear thereâs a depth to Jisungâs love for Seyeon that runs deeper than mere words. Itâs the kind of love that only a parent can understandâprotective, tender, and sometimes fragile.
âYou donât have to explain,â you say softly. âI understand what youâre trying to do. Being there for her. Youâre doing your best, even if itâs hard.â
Jisungâs gaze flickers to yours, holding for a moment longer than necessary. âItâs not just about being her dad. Itâs about being someone she can rely on, someone who wonât let go, even when things get messy. Iâve failed her beforeâtoo often, honestly. But I want to get it right now.â
Seyeon reaches out, her tiny hand resting on his arm. âYouâre the best daddy, though.â
He laughs softly, brushing his fingers through her hair. âYouâre the best daughter.â
You take a sip of your drink, the atmosphere soft and unburdened. Seyeon seems to sense the moment, her energy mellowing as she quietly munches on a pastry.
Jisung finally shifts his gaze back to you, his smile fading slightly as he leans in a little closer. âI wanted to apologize for everythingâhow things ended between me and her mother, the times I wasnât there for Seyeon the way I should have been. Itâs been a journey.â
You nod gently, your expression compassionate. âNo need to apologize. Life happens, and we all do the best we can with what we have. Youâve clearly tried.â
Thereâs a long pause, the quiet hum of the cafĂ© filling the space between your words. Seyeonâs light laughter bubbles up again as she tries to balance her juice box on her nose, her playful antics bringing a refreshing lift to the moment.
Seyeon suddenly pipes up, cutting through the quiet moment. âCan we get ice cream now?â
Jisungâs eyes sparkle as he glances at you. âIce cream sounds good, doesnât it?â
You laugh softly, nodding. âIce cream is always a good idea.â
The ice cream stand is a lively hub of chatter and sweet aromas. Seyeon giggles as she holds her cone tightly, a swirl of pastel colors already melting down the sides and onto her small hands. Jisung grabs a handful of napkins, gently wiping her sticky fingers with a chuckle. You watch the scene with a warm smile, enjoying how natural and effortless their bond is despite the challenges Jisung hinted at earlier.
As the sun begins to set, casting a golden glow over the streets, Jisung glances over at you. âY/n, can I talk to you for a minute?â he asks softly, nodding toward a quieter corner near a park bench.
Seyeon is too engrossed in her ice cream to notice as you nod, following Jisung to the side. His expression is serious yet gentle, the kind of look that tells you heâs been mulling over something important.
âIâve been thinking about what you said earlier,â he starts, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. âAbout struggling to find work and trying to figure things out.â
You nod, slightly apprehensive about where this is going. âItâs been tough, yeah. But Iâll figure something out eventually.â
He looks down briefly, then back up at you, his dark eyes steady. âWhat if you didnât have to figure it out alone? What if you gave being Seyeonâs nanny a try? Just for a day to start. See how it feels.â
The suggestion catches you off guard. âMe? Her nanny?â
Jisung nods, his expression hopeful but measured. âShe adores you already, also she basically asked you. I mean, itâs not like Iâve got a huge list of options, but even if I didâŠÂ I trust you. And clearly, Seyeon does too.â
You hesitate, unsure of how to respond. âJisung, I donât knowâŠÂ Iâve never worked as a nanny before.â
He smiles softly, leaning back against the bench. âYou donât have to be perfect. You just have to care, and you already do. Plus, Iâd be close by if you needed anything. My studioâs right in the area â also I would never leave you alone the first time with her only, she can be pretty pissed off the first time.â
You glance back at Seyeon, whoâs sitting on a nearby bench, happily licking her ice cream and humming a tune to herself. The sight of her carefree joy tugs at your heartstrings.
âShe does seem pretty attached already,â you admit with a small laugh. âBut are you sure? I mean, I donât want to step into something thatâs too personalââ
âItâs not like that,â Jisung interrupts gently. âThis isnât just about convenience. I see how you are with her. She lights up around you in a way that makes me think... maybe this could work.â
You chew on the inside of your cheek, weighing the idea. Itâs unconventional, sure, but the sincerity in Jisungâs voice is undeniable. And the truth is, you could use the job, even if itâs temporary.
âI guess I could try it for a day,â you finally say, your voice cautious but open. âSee how it goes.â
A relieved smile spreads across Jisungâs face. âThatâs all Iâm asking. If it doesnât work out, no hard feelings. ButâŠthank you, y/n. Really.â
Before you can reply, Seyeon bounces over, her ice cream cone now just a sticky napkin and a smile. âWhat are you guys talking about?â she asks, her big eyes darting between the two of you.
Jisung crouches down to her level, a playful grin on his face. ây/n might spend more time with us soon. Would you like that, princess?â
Seyeon gasps, her face lighting up like fireworks. âYes! Yes, yes, yes! Please, y/nie!â
You laugh, her enthusiasm infectious. âOkay, okay, calm down. Letâs try it out first and see if you donât get tired of me.â
âNever!â Seyeon exclaims, throwing her arms around your legs in a tight hug.
Jisung straightens up, his smile softening. âGuess weâll figure out the details tomorrow? Her mother is out for a couple days and I have her in my apartment.â
âYeah,â you reply, ruffling Seyeonâs hair as she clings to you. âTomorrow.â
The three of you start walking again, the sun dipping below the horizon as the city lights flicker on. Itâs not the future you imagined for yourself, but maybeâjust maybeâitâs a step toward something brighter.
The next morning arrives faster than expected, and you find yourself standing outside Jisungâs apartment, clutching your bag nervously. The sleek, modern building looms above you, its pristine facade reflecting the pale morning light. You take a deep breath, adjusting your jacket as you summon the courage to ring the doorbell.
Within seconds, the door swings open, revealing Jisung, whoâs already dressed in casual yet stylish clothesâa hoodie layered under a lightweight jacket, paired with black joggers â you would never tell that heâs in his 30s. His signature round glasses sit on his nose, giving him a surprisingly approachable look despite his celebrity status.
âMorning,â he greets with a warm smile. âRight on time.â
âYeah,â you reply, forcing a small laugh. âDidnât want to be late for my⊠trial run.â
Jisung chuckles, stepping aside to let you in. âCome on in. Seyeonâs been asking about you since she woke up.â
The apartment is as modern and stylish as youâd expectâminimalist furniture, neutral tones, and an impressive wall of windows that offer a panoramic view of Seoul. But despite the sleek design, there are signs of Seyeonâs presence everywhere, even if she doesnât go there that often. A small table in the corner is covered in crayons and paper, her drawings pinned to the wall above it. A stuffed bunny sits on the couch, one of its ears slightly chewed on, and a trail of tiny sneakers leads toward her bedroom.
âSheâs in her room getting dressed,â Jisung explains, closing the door behind you. âItâs her version of a fashion show, so⊠good luck getting her out anytime soon.â
You laugh, already feeling some of your nerves dissipate. âSounds like a diva in the making.â
âShe gets it from her mom,â Jisung says with a fond smile, though thereâs a hint of sadness in his tone. Even if they are not together anymore he really loved her, things moved really slow in their relationship and after her he just had some casual hook ups around â nothing too deep. Heâs scared of getting too into a relationship with someone. He clears his throat quickly, motioning toward the kitchen. âWant some coffee? I was just making a pot.â
âSure, thanks,â you reply, following him into the open kitchen. The smell of freshly brewed coffee fills the air as Jisung pours two cups, sliding one across the counter to you.
As you sip your coffee, you decide to broach the subject thatâs been on your mind. âSo⊠how do you want this to go today? Any specific rules or routines I should know about?â
Jisung leans against the counter, his hands wrapped around his mug. âHonestly, just be yourself. Seyeonâs pretty easygoing once she warms up to someone, and she already seems to adore you. She loves arts and crafts, playing dress-up, and reading, so youâll probably spend a lot of time doing those things.â
You nod, making mental notes. âGot it. Anything I should avoid?â
He hesitates for a moment, his expression softening. âShe might bring up her mom. Itâs still a sensitive topic for her, so just⊠be patient if she does. I try not to push her too much, but sometimes she needs to talk about it.â
âOf course,â you say, your tone reassuring. âIâll be careful.â
Before Jisung can respond, a loud âTada!â echoes from the hallway, and Seyeon bursts into the room, twirling in a bright pink tutu over her striped pajamas. Her hair is an adorable mess, with a sparkly headband perched crookedly on top, a grey cat following behind her. The catâs meowing toward them and it jump on top of the iland of the kitchen, you pass the fingers through the furr.
âWhat do you think, y/n?â she asks, striking a dramatic pose. âAm I a princess?â
âYouâre the most fabulous princess Iâve ever seen,â you reply with a grin, the little girlâs laugh fill the room, at the excited sound the cat runs away making jisung lightly giggle â his pet friend still getting used by the presence of the loud daughter.
Seyeon beams, running over to grab your hand. âCome on! Letâs play dress-up!â
Jisung laughs as she drags you toward her room, her enthusiasm infectious. âIâll leave you two to it,â he says, shaking his head with amusement. âIâll be in the studio if you need me, just down the hallway.â
Youâre barely able to wave goodbye before Seyeon pulls you into her roomâa whirlwind of color and chaos. The walls are painted a soft lavender, and every surface is covered in toys, books, and more clothes than any five-year-old could possibly wear. She immediately begins pulling out tiaras, feather boas, and glittery shoes, chattering excitedly as she explains the ârulesâ of dress-up.
The morning passes in a blur of laughter and imagination. You and Seyeon transform into royalty, superheroes, and even pirates, complete with cardboard swords and eye patches. Her giggles are contagious, and for a while, you forget all about your nerves or the fact that this is technically a trial job.
When lunchtime rolls around, you head back to the kitchen, where Jisung is already preparing a simple meal of sandwiches and fruit. He glances up as you enter, his face lighting up at the sight of Seyeon riding on your back like a knight on a trusty steed.
âLooks like you two are having fun,â he says, setting the plates on the table.
âThe best fun ever!â Seyeon declares, sliding off your back and plopping into a chair.
You smile, taking a seat across from her. âSheâs got quite the imagination.â
Jisung watches the two of you with a thoughtful expression, his gaze lingering on how naturally you interact with his daughter. As you help Seyeon with her sandwich, he leans back in his chair, a small smile tugging at his lips.
âThanks for today,â he says quietly, meeting your eyes. âI know itâs just one day, but⊠I think this could really work.â
You glance at Seyeon, whoâs happily munching away, then back at Jisung. A sense of warmth fills your chest as you realize youâre starting to feel at home in this little corner of their world.
âYeah,â you reply softly. âI think it could too.â
After lunch, Seyeon insists on showing you her favorite books. She pulls you into the living room, climbing onto the plush couch with a stack of brightly colored storybooks in her arms. You settle in beside her as she excitedly flips through the pages, pointing out her favorite characters and scenes.
âThis oneâs about a bunny who gets lost but finds his way home,â she says, holding up a book with a soft pastel cover. âMommy reads it to me all the time.â
Her mention of her mother comes so naturally that it catches you off guard, but you remember Jisungâs advice to let Seyeon talk about it if she wants to. âIt sounds like a beautiful story,â you say gently. âWould you like me to read it to you?â
Seyeon nods enthusiastically, scooting closer to you. As you read, she leans against your side, her small hand clutching your arm. By the time you finish the book, sheâs curled up next to you, her eyes drooping with sleep.
Jisung steps out of his studio, his footsteps soft on the hardwood floor. He pauses when he sees the two of you on the couch, a smile spreading across his face. âSheâs out, huh?â
âAlmost,â you whisper, glancing down at her. âShe had a big morning.â
He nods, walking over to lift her gently into his arms. She stirs slightly, mumbling something incoherent before settling against his shoulder. Jisung looks at you with a mix of gratitude and something elseâsomething warmer, deeper.
âYouâre a natural,â he says quietly as he carries Seyeon to her room.
You follow him to the hallway, leaning against the doorframe as he tucks her into bed. He moves with such care, brushing a strand of hair from her face and placing her stuffed bunny next to her. Watching him, you realize just how deeply he loves his daughter, how much heâs trying to give her the stability she needs.
When he steps back into the hallway, he closes Seyeonâs door with a soft click and turns to you. âThanks for being so patient with her,â he says. âSheâs⊠well, sheâs been through a lot. More than a five-year-old should.â
âSheâs a wonderful kid,â you reply honestly. âAnd she clearly adores you.â
Jisung leans against the wall, running a hand through his hair. âI just want to do right by her, you know? After the divorce⊠I donât want her to feel like sheâs missing out on anything.â
You nod, understanding the weight of his words. âYouâre doing your best, Jisung. And it shows. Sheâs happy, and thatâs what matters.â
He looks at you, his gaze steady. âI meant what I said earlier. I think this could work. You and Seyeonâitâs like youâve known each other forever.â
A small smile tugs at your lips. âSheâs easy to love.â
Jisungâs eyes soften. âShe thinks the same about you.â
Thereâs a pause, a quiet moment where the weight of the conversation hangs in the air. Jisung seems to be considering something, his expression thoughtful.
âIf youâre willing,â he says after a moment, âIâd like to make this more than just a trial run. I know itâs only been a day, but⊠I feel like this is the right fit. For her, and for you.â
Your heart skips a beat at his sincerity. âAre you sure? I mean, itâs a big responsibility.â
âI know,â he replies, his voice firm yet kind. âAnd I wouldnât ask if I didnât think you could handle it. But more than that⊠I trust you. And so does Seyeon.â
You take a deep breath, the weight of his words settling in your chest. Itâs not just a jobâitâs a chance to be part of something meaningful, to help this little family heal and grow.
âOkay,â you say finally, a small smile forming. âIâll do it.â
Jisungâs face lights up with relief and gratitude. âThank you, y/n. Really.â
Just then, Seyeonâs soft voice calls out from her room, breaking the moment. âDaddy? Y/n?â
Jisung chuckles, pushing off the wall. âLooks like someoneâs not quite asleep yet.â
You laugh, following him back to Seyeonâs room. As you step inside, you see her sitting up in bed, her bunny clutched tightly to her chest.
âDid you say yes, y/n?â she asks, her voice laced with sleepiness and hope.
You walk over to her, crouching down so youâre at eye level. âI did. Looks like youâre stuck with me.â
Seyeonâs face lights up, and she throws her arms around your neck. âYay! I love you, y/n.â
Your heart swells at her words, and you glance up at Jisung, whoâs watching with a soft smile. In that moment, you realize youâve found something you didnât even know you were looking forâa place where you truly belong.
The days quickly settle into a new rhythm. The mornings when Seyeon is at his apartment, you arrive at Jisungâs apartment to find Seyeon waiting for you with excitement bubbling in her tiny frame. Her favorite game is to guess what youâre wearing before you come inâa little ritual she made upâand she squeals with delight when sheâs right.
âPink sweater today! I knew it!â she announces one morning, hopping from foot to foot as you step inside.
âYouâre getting too good at this,â you reply, laughing as you hang your bag by the door.
Jisung, already sipping his coffee at the kitchen counter, greets you with a relaxed smile. âSheâs been talking about you since she woke up.â
âItâs mutual,â you tease, giving him a mock-serious look. âSheâs got me wrapped around her little finger.â
Seyeon beams, running off to grab her crayons and sketchbook. While she sets up at the living room table, Jisung leans against the counter, his gaze warm but thoughtful.
âShe really does adore you,â he says softly. âIâve never seen her take to someone like this before.â
You shrug, a little flustered by his sincerity. âSheâs easy to love.â
âSo are you,â he replies without thinking, and the words hang in the air for a moment. His eyes widen slightly, as if he hadnât meant to say it aloud, and he quickly turns back to his coffee. âI meanâuhâyouâre great with her. Thatâs all I meant.â
You chuckle, letting him off the hook. âRelax, Jisung. Iâll take the compliment.â
As the weeks pass, your bond with Seyeon grows stronger. You spend hours doing crafts, reading stories, and exploring the nearby parks. She introduces you to her favorite playground and insists on teaching you how to climb the jungle gym, which ends with her laughing hysterically as you awkwardly navigate the narrow bars.
One evening, as youâre helping Seyeon clean up her paints after an afternoon of finger painting, she pauses and looks up at you with her big, expressive eyes.
âY/n,â she says, her voice small and serious. âDo you think Mommy would like you?â
The question catches you off guard, and you glance over at Jisung, whoâs working at the kitchen table. Heâs heard her too, his posture stiffening slightly as he waits for your response.
You crouch down to Seyeonâs level, meeting her gaze. âI donât know, sweetie,â you say honestly. âBut I hope so.â
Seyeon seems to think about this for a moment, then nods as if sheâs made up her mind. âI think she would. Youâre nice. And you make Daddy smile.â
Your breath catches at her words, and you glance at Jisung again. Heâs looking at you now, his expression unreadable but soft. Thereâs something unspoken in the way his gaze lingers, something that makes your heart race.
âThank you, Seyeon,â you whisper, giving her a gentle hug. âThat means a lot.â
Itâs a stormy afternoon, the kind where the rain drums against the windows in a steady rhythm, casting a gray haze over the city. Youâre busy tidying up Seyeonâs play area when you notice sheâs unusually quiet. Normally, sheâd be coloring or arranging her toys into elaborate scenes, but today, sheâs sitting on the couch, hugging her stuffed bunny with a somber expression.
âHey, sweetie,â you say gently, walking over to her. âWhatâs wrong? Youâve been so quiet today.â
Seyeon doesnât answer right away. She shifts slightly, burying her face in her bunny. After a moment, she mumbles, âI want Mommy.â
The words hit you like a cold splash of water. Seyeon has mentioned missing her mom before is not a new, in these cases you would play a song for making her feel better or just asking her to do something to keep her mind away from the hard times when she is away from her mother - even for just a couple days like their divorce's papers mention. But this time, thereâs a weight to her voice that makes your chest ache.
âOf course you do,â you say, crouching down to her level. âItâs okay to miss her, Seyeon.â
She finally looks up at you, her big eyes glistening with unshed tears. âMommy and Daddy were yelling,â she says, her voice trembling. âI heard them on the phone. Mommy was crying. I donât want to be here. I want to go home.â
You pause, your heart breaking for the little girl. It doesnât take much to piece together what must have happenedâJisung and his ex-wife must have had an argument, and Seyeon overheard it. You donât know the details, but itâs clear itâs left her feeling hurt and confused.
âIâm so sorry you heard that, sweetie,â you say softly. âThat must have been really hard.â
Seyeon nods, her lip trembling. âIt was scary. I donât want Daddy to be mad at Mommy.â
You sit down beside her, giving her space but staying close enough that she knows youâre there. âSometimes grown-ups get upset with each other, and they say things they donât mean,â you explain. âBut that doesnât mean they donât love you. Your mommy and daddy both love you so much, Seyeon. Thatâs the most important thing.â
âI still want Mommy,â she whispers, clutching her bunny tighter.
Youâre about to respond when Jisung walks in from the hallway. He must have heard part of the conversation because his expression is filled with a mix of guilt and concern. He kneels beside you and reaches out for Seyeon, but she shrinks away, clutching her bunny even tighter.
âSeyeonnie, baby,â Jisung says softly, his voice breaking slightly. âIâm so sorry you heard that. Daddy didnât mean to make you upset.â
Seyeon shakes her head, fresh tears streaming down her cheeks. âYou were mean to Mommy! I donât want to stay here! I want her!â
The words hit Jisung hard, and you can see the pain in his eyes. He glances at you, silently asking for help.
âSeyeon,â you say gently, shifting closer to her. âItâs okay to feel upset. But maybe we can talk about it together. Would you like to tell Daddy how youâre feeling?â
She sniffles, her tiny body trembling with emotion. âI donât want to talk to Daddy,â she says quietly. Then, looking at you, she adds, âAnd I donât want to talk to you either. I just want Mommy.â
The rejection stings, but you remind yourself that this isnât about you. Itâs about Seyeon needing to process her feelings in her own way. It's a part of your current job: being able to tell when their feelings are real or just overwhelming by things around her.
Jisung sits back on his heels, running a hand through his hair. âSweetheart, Iâll call Mommy, and we can figure out a time for you to see her soon, okay? But right now, weâre here for you. Me and y/n both.â
Seyeon doesnât respond, turning away and curling up on the couch. Jisung looks at you again, his expression helpless.
You stand up and gently place a hand on his arm. âLetâs give her a little space,â you whisper.
He nods reluctantly, and the two of you step into the kitchen. Once youâre out of earshot, Jisung leans against the counter, his shoulders slumping. âI messed up,â he mutters. âI never should have let her hear that.â
âItâs not your fault, Jisung,â you say quietly. âThese things happen. Sheâs just overwhelmed right now.â
He looks at you, his eyes filled with worry. âWhat do I do? She doesnât even want to look at me.â
âGive her time,â you suggest. âLet her know youâre here when sheâs ready to talk. And maybe call her momâjust hearing her voice might help Seyeon feel better. She will swing around jisung don't worry.â
He nods, pulling out his phone. As he dials, you glance back at the living room. Seyeon is still curled up on the couch, her bunny held close, but something tells you sheâs listening.
A little later, after Jisung has arranged a call between Seyeon and her mom, you bring over a small plate of cookies and a glass of milk. You donât say anything, just set it on the table near her and sit down in a chair a few feet away. Slowly, Seyeon uncurls, reaching for a cookie.
âIâm sorry,â she whispers after a few moments, her voice barely audible.
You smile softly, your heart aching with tenderness. âYou donât have to be sorry, sweetie. Itâs okay to feel sad or mad. We all feel that way sometimes.â
Seyeon nods, nibbling on the cookie. Then, tentatively, she scoots closer to you. âWill you stay with me?â
âOf course,â you say, your voice steady and reassuring. âIâm not going anywhere.â
For now, thatâs enough. And as Seyeon leans her head against your arm, you glance over at Jisung, who gives you a small, grateful smile. Together, youâll help Seyeon through thisâone step at a time.
Itâs late evening when your phone buzzes with a message from Jisung. Youâre already home, curled up on your couch, replaying the events of the day in your mind. You studied all day for the upcoming exams, all day in that for walls of your apartment.
Jisung: Hey, are you free tonight? Could you come over? Seyeonâs not here, but⊠Iâd really like to talk.
You stare at the message for a moment, your heart skipping a beat. Itâs unusual for him to ask for your company when Seyeon isnât around. That makes you slightly nervous but after a moment of hesitation, you reply.
You:Â Sure. Iâll be there in 20. You: should I be worried?
You chew your nail lightly, three dots moving on the screen as you start to get really agitated about what could actually mean. Does he want to end up things? does he think it's not necessary for him to have a nanny?
Jisung: silly, no, just wanna talk :)
When you arrive at Jisungâs apartment, he greets you at the door, his expression a mix of relief and exhaustion. Heâs dressed casually in a hoodie and sweatpants, his hair slightly disheveled, and you can tell immediately that heâs been overthinking.
âThanks for coming,â he says softly, stepping aside to let you in.
âOf course,â you reply, setting your bag down by the door. âHowâs Seyeon?â
âSheâs with her mom this week, as usual,â he explains, leading you to the couch. âI thought it might be better for her to spend some time there, especially after what happened last Sunday. But she's coming tomorrow morning so, you come to work like always.â
You nod, sitting down beside him. âThat makes sense. How are you holding up?â
He exhales heavily, running a hand through his hair. âHonestly? Not great. I feel like I let her down. She heard things she shouldnât have, and now she doesnât even want to be around me.â
âSheâs a little girl, Jisung,â you say gently. âSheâs still figuring out how to handle her emotions. It's not easy to be a parent and it doesnât mean she doesnât love you.â
He looks at you, his eyes filled with vulnerability. âI know youâre right, but itâs hard not to feel like Iâm failing her. I just⊠I donât know what Iâm doing half the time.â
You place a reassuring hand on his arm. âNo parent has it all figured out. The fact that you care so much about her shows what a great dad you are. And she knows that, even if sheâs upset right now.â
Jisung leans back against the couch, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. âIâve been thinking about that dayâabout how you handled everything. You were so patient with her, even when she pushed you away. Youâre amazing with her, y/n.â
You feel a blush creeping up your cheeks at his words. âI just want whatâs best for her. Sheâs a wonderful kid.â
He turns his head to look at you, his expression soft. âYouâre wonderful too. I donât know what I wouldâve done today without you. Since the day we met at the zoo, everything with you seems to.. find the right place.â
Thereâs a long pause, the weight of his words settling between you. Finally, he sits up straighter, his brow furrowed in thought.
âY/n, I didnât ask you over just to vent,â he admits, his voice quieter now. âIâve been thinking⊠Seyeonâs been through so much with the divorce, and I know I canât fix everything for her. But having you aroundâitâs made such a difference. For her and for me.â
You blink, caught off guard by the intensity in his gaze. âJisungâŠâ
âI donât just mean as her nanny,â he continues quickly, his words tumbling out. âI mean⊠as someone I can rely on. Someone whoâs already become such an important part of our lives. I donât want to cross any boundaries or make things weird, butââ
âYouâre not,â you interrupt gently, placing a hand on his knee to calm his rambling. âI understand what youâre trying to say.â
His shoulders relax slightly, but his eyes remain fixed on yours. âI guess what Iâm trying to say is that youâre more than just Seyeonâs nanny to me. And I donât know where this could go, but Iâd like to find out. If youâre willing.â
The room feels suddenly smaller, the air charged with unspoken possibilities. You take a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest, his eyes so big and soft makes you shivers.
âI care about you too, Jisung,â you admit softly. âAnd I care about Seyeon. I want to be here for both of you, but⊠we need to be careful. For her sake.â
He nods, his expression thoughtful. âI agree. She comes first, always. But I donât want to let thisâwhatever this isâslip away.â
âLetâs take it one step at a time,â you say gently.
Jisung nods, relief and hope flickering in his eyes. âOne step at a time,â he agrees.
The next morning, you arrive at Jisungâs apartment right on time, ready to start your day with Seyeon. As you step inside, youâre greeted by the familiar hum of activityâthe soft sound of music playing from the speakers, the faint smell of coffee wafting from the kitchen, and Seyeonâs little voice drifting from her play area.
Sheâs sitting on the floor in her pajamas, surrounded by an army of stuffed animals. When she spots you, her face lights up in a way that makes your heart swell.
ây/n!â she exclaims, running over to you with her bunny clutched in one hand. âLook! I made a picnic for my friends!â
You crouch down to her level, admiring the intricate arrangement of plates, cups, and plastic food. âThis looks amazing, Seyeon! Did you set this all up by yourself?â
She nods proudly, her curls bouncing. âUh-huh! But youâre late, so we already ate the sandwiches.â
You gasp playfully. âOh no! I missed the sandwiches? What am I going to eat now?â
Seyeon giggles, pulling you by the hand to sit down with her. âYou can have dessert! We have cake and cookies.â
Jisung walks in at that moment, a mug of coffee in his hand. He leans against the doorway, watching the two of you with a soft smile. âLooks like youâve been invited to the fanciest picnic in town,â he teases.
A blush spread on your face, remembering about the conversation that you had with Jisung the night before, âOnly the best for me,â you reply with a grin, pretending to nibble on an invisible cookie. Seyeon bursts into another fit of giggles, clearly delighted by the attention.
The morning passes in a blur of laughter and playtime. You and Seyeon build a towering castle out of blocks, only for her to gleefully knock it down moments later. She insists on showing you her latest drawings, and you listen intently as she explains the story behind each one.
But itâs during her naptime that the moment when jisung is casually off work on his productions session.. After reading her favourite bedtime story, you tuck her in, smoothing the blanket over her small frame. Her eyes are heavy with sleep, but just as youâre about to leave, she reaches out and grabs your hand.
ây/n?â she whispers, her voice small and drowsy.
âYes, sweetie?â
She hesitates for a moment before speaking. âDo you think Daddy loves Mommy still?â
The question catches you off guard, and for a moment, youâre at a loss for words. You kneel down beside her bed, meeting her wide, searching eyes.
âI think your daddy loves you more than anything in the whole world,â you say gently. âAnd sometimes, grown-ups love each other in different ways. But no matter what, he and your mommy will always work together to make sure youâre happy and loved.â
She seems to mull over your words, her eyelids fluttering as sleep begins to take over. âDo you love Daddy?â she mumbles, her words slurring slightly.
Your breath catches in your throat. âI think your daddy is a very special person,â you say carefully. âAnd Iâm really happy I get to spend time with you and him.â
Seyeon hums in acknowledgment, her grip on your hand loosening as she finally drifts off. You sit there for a moment longer, brushing a stray curl from her forehead before quietly slipping out of the room. The realisation hits hard, she asked you a question that really makes you in difficulty, your hands are lightly sweaty after the careful words that you let hanging in her room.
You walk out closing the door behind you, as youâre cleaning up in the living room, Jisung comes in from his studio. Heâs wearing his headphones around his neck and looks a little more relaxed than he did yesterday.
âSheâs asleep?â he asks, leaning against the couch.
âOut like a light,â you reply with a smile. âShe was so busy today, she didnât stand a chance.â
Jisung chuckles, his eyes softening. âThank you for being so patient with her. I know she can be a handful sometimes.â
âSheâs a sweetheart,â you say, brushing off his praise. âAnd she adores you, Jisung. Youâre doing a great job, even if it doesnât always feel like it.â
Thereâs a pause, the air between you warm and comfortable. Jisung sits down beside you, his gaze flickering to the kitchen before settling back on you.
âIâve been thinking about what you said yesterday,â he starts, his voice quieter now. âAbout taking things one step at a time. I just want you to know how much it means to me that youâre here. Not just for Seyeon, but for me too.â
Your heart skips a beat at his words, and you feel a blush creeping up your neck. âIâm happy to be here,â you admit softly.
The days pass, and your bond with Seyeonâand with Jisungâdeepens. Seyeon grows more comfortable around you, often seeking you out for everything from help with her drawings to impromptu dance performances in the living room. Jisung, in turn, seems to relax more in your presence, his usual walls lowering bit by bit.
One afternoon, after a particularly lively dance session with Seyeon that left you both giggling on the carpet, Jisung calls you into the kitchen. Heâs preparing a snack for Seyeon, but the way he keeps glancing at you suggests he has something on his mind.
ây/n, can we talk for a second?â he asks, his voice cautious but kind.
âOf course,â you reply, leaning against the counter. âWhatâs up?â
He sets down the knife heâs been using to slice fruit and turns to face you fully. âIâve been thinking about how much things have changed since you started working with us. Youâve brought so much stability into Seyeonâs life. And mine.â
You feel a mix of pride and nervousness at his words. âIâm glad Iâve been able to help,â you say sincerely. âSheâs such a special little girl. And youâre doing an amazing job as her dad.â
âI know we agreed to take things slow,â he continues, his gaze steady but vulnerable. âBut I canât ignore how much you mean to both of us. I care about you, y/n. A lot. And I want to know if you feel the same.â
For a moment, the room feels impossibly still. Then, you nod, a small, shy smile spreading across your face.
âI do, Jisung,â you admit. âBut Iâve been trying to be carefulâfor Seyeonâs sake.â
He nods, his expression softening. âI know. And I appreciate that more than you know. I just⊠I donât want to let this slip away. I want us to figure this outâtogether.â
Before you can respond, a small voice interrupts from the doorway.
âDaddy?â
Both of you turn to see Seyeon standing there, her bunny clutched to her chest. Her hair is a little messy from her earlier playtime, and her wide eyes dart between the two of you.
âHey, sweet cheeks,â Jisung says gently, crouching down to her level. âWhatâs wrong?â
Seyeon hesitates, then shuffles over to him. âCan y/n stay for dinner? And maybe⊠can we all watch a movie after?" The innocence of her request tugs at your heart, and Jisung glances up at you with a smile.
âWhat do you say?â he asks.
You kneel down beside them, matching Seyeonâs level. âIâd love to stay. But only if I get to pick the movie,â you tease, earning a giggle from the little girl.
As Seyeon throws her arms around both of you, pulling you into a spontaneous group hug, you realize how much this little family means to youâand how much youâre starting to mean to them.
Dinner that evening feels warm and lively, the kind of atmosphere that wraps around you like a cozy blanket. Jisung insists on cooking, and though the meal is simpleâgrilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soupâit feels perfect. Seyeon sits at the table, swinging her legs beneath her chair as she chatters about her favorite animals and what movie she thinks you should all watch.
âI think we should watch Moana!â Seyeon declares, her cheeks puffing as she takes a bite of her sandwich.
Jisung raises an eyebrow. âDidnât we just watch that last weekend?â
âBut y/n hasnât watched it with us!â Seyeon protests, her pout making you chuckle.
âIâd love to watch Moana,â you say, playfully nudging her. âBut only if you promise to sing the songs with me.â
Her face lights up, and she practically bounces in her seat. âOkay! Iâll sing the Maui parts, and you can be Moana!â
Jisung laughs, shaking his head. âGuess Iâm stuck being the chicken, huh?â
Seyeon giggles, and the sound fills the room, light and contagious. You catch Jisungâs eye across the table, and for a moment, the two of you share a lookâone that feels like a silent agreement, a shared understanding that this little moment is something special.
After dinner, you all settle into the living room. Seyeon grabs her favorite blanket and curls up between you and Jisung on the couch. The lights are dimmed, the opening scene of Moana playing on the TV.
Seyeon sings along enthusiastically, her little voice bright and unrestrained. You join in at her insistence, your laughter mingling with hers as you both belt out the lyrics. Jisung, true to his word, adds exaggerated squawks whenever Hei Hei, the chicken, is on screen, earning peals of laughter from his daughter.
At one point, Seyeon leans her head against your arm, her tiny hand resting on your lap. The gesture is small but significant, and you feel a lump forming in your throat. When you glance over at Jisung, you notice heâs watching the two of you with a soft expression, his smile tinged with something deeper. His hand moves over your shoulder behind the couch, tracing pattern on your skin; shivers running down your spine.
As the movie progresses, Seyeonâs energy begins to wane. By the time Moana reaches Te Fiti, sheâs fast asleep, her head now resting on your shoulder. You glance down at her peaceful face, her bunny tucked securely in her arms.
âSheâs out,â you whisper, careful not to wake her.
Jisung nods, a fond smile on his lips. âShe had a big day. And I think all that singing wore her out.â
You laugh softly, shifting slightly to make sure Seyeon is comfortable. âDo you want me to move her to her bed?â
Jisung shakes his head. âNo, let her stay for a bit. She looks comfortable.â
For a while, the two of you sit in companionable silence, the credits of the movie rolling on the screen. Seyeonâs gentle breathing fills the room, a steady rhythm that feels grounding.
âThank you for staying tonight,â Jisung says quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
You look over at him, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the TV. âIâm happy to be here,â you reply honestly.
Jisung hesitates for a moment before reaching out, his hand brushing against yours on the couch. The touch is light, tentative, but it sends a wave of warmth through you. When you donât pull away, he intertwines his fingers with yours, giving your hand a gentle squeeze.
You smile at him, your heart full as you glance down at Seyeon. In this moment, surrounded by quiet warmth and the soft hum of contentment, you feel like youâve found a place where you truly belong.
Jisung carefully scoops Seyeon into his arms, her bunny still clutched tightly to her chest. She stirs slightly but doesnât wake, her little face peaceful as she nestles closer to her father. He glances at you with a small smile before carrying her to her room.
You stay on the couch, tidying up the throw blankets and pillows, unsure if you should take your leave or wait for him to return. The quiet hum of the apartment makes you feel strangely calm, and yet, thereâs a nervous energy lingering in the air.
A few minutes later, Jisung emerges from Seyeonâs room, shutting the door softly behind him. He looks tired but content, his hands resting on his hips as he walks back toward you.
âIs she okay?â you ask softly.
âOut like a light,â he replies with a chuckle, running a hand through his hair. âShe didnât even let go of that bunny.â
You smile, standing up and grabbing your bag. âWell, I should probably get going. Itâs getting late.â
Jisungâs expression shifts slightly, a mix of hesitation and something deeper flashing across his face. âWait,â he says, his voice quiet but urgent. âCan you⊠stay a little longer? Just me and you?â
His request catches you off guard, and for a moment, youâre unsure how to respond. But the trill of being alone with him keeps you rooted in place.
âOkay,â you say softly, setting your bag back down. âI can stay.â
The room feels quieter, the hum of conversation and laughter from earlier fading into a gentle stillness. Jisung steps closer, his gaze searching yours, as if trying to find the words that have been building between you both. His hand brushes against yours lightly, a soft touch that lingers a moment too long to be innocent.
âThank you,â he murmurs, his voice a whisper against the space between you. Thereâs a hesitation in his eyes, a vulnerability that pulls at your heart. You feel an electric spark, a tender moment that feels like it belongs only to you both.
âYou didnât have to ask,â you respond quietly, the warmth of his touch igniting a fire within you. âI wanted to stay.â
He smiles faintly, his lips parting just slightly as if savoring the words youâve given him. The air shifts, thick with unspoken desires and a quiet understanding that needs no elaboration. Your heart beats faster, anticipation making every breath feel heavier.
âGood,â he says simply, his voice smooth and low, a melody in itself. His hand slides fully into yours, fingers intertwining in a way that feels natural, almost inevitable. âJust you and me.â
Jisung move even closer, the space between you vanishing as his confidence grows. His gaze doesnât waver, his eyes holding yours with a quiet intensity that sends shivers down your spine. Without a word, he lifts a hand, brushing a stray lock of hair from your face, his touch lingering just a little longer than necessary.
âAre you sure?â he asks softly, his voice a low, husky whisper that sends a thrill through you. His breath brushes against your skin, warm and inviting. âBecause I donât want to rush this.â
You nod gently, heart fluttering as your fingers tighten around his. The world around you feels distant, every sense focused solely on himâon the way he looks at you, the way his presence consumes the room. His smile deepens, a playful glint lighting up his expression as he leans in just a bit more, the space between you almost nonexistent.
âIâve been waiting for this,â he murmurs, his lips a breath away from yours. âI donât want to waste another second.â
Your breath catches, the heat in the room intensifying. His gaze is captivating, his touch electric, and the way he holds you makes every moment feel like something sacred. You tilt your head slightly, allowing him to close the distance. His lips press softly against yours, a tender kiss that speaks of patience and desireâa perfect balance of softness and passion. His lips barely brushing against yours. He can feel you gasp slightly at the sudden action, but he holds your chin with one hand and keeps you close, prolonging the kiss for a few more seconds before pulling away, a smirk on his face. "Not so talkative now, are we?"
You giggles, blushing in face as you cover your mouth a little, "you just kissed me! what you wanted me to say? kiss me more?"
His smirk grows bigger, "that doesn't sounds so bad-" you grabs lightly the sides of his hoodie, clenching your fingers as you is breathless. Pulling him for another kiss, he lets out a small gasp of surprise, but then melts into the kiss, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer. His arms wrapping around your waist, bringing you flush against his body. This time the kiss is more intense, deeper, hungrier.
You ends up on his lap, straddling it and his hands vanishing on your curves, the arch of your back to groping your ass gently, his hands makes you shivers.
A little gasp leaving your lips when his fingers digs on your rear, "u-uhm jisung.." you mumble, your lips for how badly you want to move away to stop the passionate moments, they keeps asking for more from jisung.
âHm?â He hums as his tongue brushes against your bottom lip, his so needy, so messy, and youâre loving every second of it, even if you cannot stop thinking about his daughter being just in the room down the hallway.Â
You move your lips apart letting his tongue meeting his in need, his hands pressing down your hips against his lap, you can feel his hardness through his clothes and itâs so damn sexy that your pussy start to pulse. âSeyeon.. she might.. wake up..â
Gasps between kisses, your lips are locked with him as he suck gently your tongue making you moan under your breath, heâs such a good kisser.
Before either of you can say more, the sound of a tiny voice cuts through the moment.
âDaddy! I need you!â
Seyeonâs voice, muffled but unmistakable, drifts out from her bedroom down the hall.
Both of you freeze in place, eyes wide and suddenly aware of the situation, youâre still on his lap, heâs still hard as hell and his hands are holding your ass.
âOh no,â Jisung mutters, glancing toward her room. âNot now.â
You giggle softly, a nervous laugh thatâs quickly overtaken by a chuckle. âYou have to go,â you whisper, trying to hold back the laughter bubbling up. âSheâs calling for you.â
Jisung groans dramatically, squeezing his eyes shut for a second before shaking his head. âShe couldnât have waited just five more minutes?â
âI think those five minutes wouldâve take us in another situation,â you respond with a smirk, you move from his lap, standing up and fixing your clothes at the best. âDuty calls.â
He sighs, turning toward her room. âIâll be right there, sweet cheeks!â
You make a beeline for the front door, grabbing your bag in a hurry, trying to stifle your laughter as you hear Seyeon giggling softly through the wall.
You poke your head back into the living room just as Jisung kneels beside her bed, trying his best to soothe her back to sleep. His expression is slightly flustered, and you canât help but laugh one last time at the sheer comical timing.
âGoodnight, Jisung!â you call out with a wink. âGood luck!â
âThanks,â he replies with a sheepish grin, though his voice carries a touch of relief when you finally step out the door.
As the door clicks shut behind you, the sound of Seyeonâs laughter and Jisungâs soothing voice floats into the night, and you canât stop the grin that spreads across your face.
Maybe next time, there will be fewer interruptions. But for tonight, the memory of that unexpected moment will stay with you.
Itâs been almost seven months that you work for Jisung, since that day at the zoo youâre life almost switched. You passed almost every day waiting for the Saturday morning to see that little girl and her, very hot, daddy. Dawns with a quiet stillness in Jisungâs apartment. You arrive early to find Seyeon still curled up in bed, her little face flushed with fever and her bunny clutched tightly in her arms. Her soft coughs echo through the room, and itâs clear sheâs not feeling her usual energetic self.
He told you by text that she was not feeling very well but the mother had to go on a business trip and she had to crash at his place for the rest of the weekend. Jisung is already in the kitchen, his own expression worn with worry, a damp towel pressed to his forehead. His hair is slightly messy, and his usually sharp eyes are dulled with fatigue. He turns when he hears your footsteps, his smile tired but appreciative.
âGood morning,â he greets you softly. âSorry you had to see me like this.â
You step into the kitchen and take the towel from his hand, gently replacing it with a fresh one. âYou look worse than Seyeon,â you tease lightly, though your concern is genuine. âAre you okay?â
He chuckles weakly, leaning against the counter. âNot exactly the most glamorous morning, huh?â
âNo, but someone has to be the adult,â you say with a grin, though you glance over at Seyeon with a frown. âLet me handle her. You rest.â
âI would kiss you if I could,â He pout lightly toward you, almost playfully trying to steal a breif kiss from your lips.
Your giggles making him feel lightly better, âDonât even try.â
Jisung sighs, grateful for your presence, and moves toward the couch. He collapses onto it with a sigh, his breathing steady but slow, clearly feeling the effects of whatever sickness has taken hold of both him and his daughter.
You walk softly into Seyeonâs room, pulling back the curtains to let the morning light in gently. She blinks up at you, her little face pale but her bright eyes still wide with curiosity.
âHi, sweet cheeks,â you murmur, sitting down beside her bed. âHow are you feeling?â
She sniffles, hugging her bunny tighter. âDaddyâs not feeling good either.â
You glance toward the living room, where Jisung lies sprawled out, looking almost worse than she does. âYeah, well, Daddy might need some extra care too.â You ruffle her hair gently, trying to lift her spirits. âLetâs get you some breakfast, okay?â
Seyeon nods softly, her tiny hand wrapping around yours as you help her sit up. Her fever is still high, but her energy, though subdued, is still there. You prepare a light breakfastâwarm soup, soft toast, and waterâand sit with her at the dining table.
Meanwhile, Jisung has managed to find the strength to make his way to the kitchen, his movements slow but determined. He leans against the doorway, watching you with a quiet admiration, a small smile touching his lips as you care for his daughter.
âYou donât have to do all this,â he says softly, his voice hoarse from his own illness.
You glance up, offering him a reassuring smile. âYouâre not alone in this, Jisung. She needs both of you right now.â
He breathes out a sigh, his shoulders relaxing at your words. âThank you, y/n. For everything.â
âItâs what friends do,â you reply, though your heart aches a little at how fragile the moment feels. Taking care of them bothâso sick and vulnerableâis more than just a task. It feels personal. It feels like family.
Also the fact that you called him âfriendâ makes a fool out of you.
As the day stretches on, you find yourself handling both Jisung and Seyeon with gentle care, managing meals, administering medicine, and even tucking them into bed for naps. They may be ill, but thereâs a quiet warmth that fills the apartment, a sense of support and togetherness that feels like a foundation for something more.
When the evening arrives, Seyeon is finally asleep in her room, and Jisung, though still weak, sits upright on the couch. Youâre back in the kitchen, making tea for the both of you, the space calming and steady amidst the chaos of the day.
Jisung watches you from the doorway again, his eyes filled with gratitude and something softerâsomething you recognize as something deeper.
ây/n,â he starts softly, âYou didnât have to stay this long.â
You glance over your shoulder with a small smile. âI wanted to. And Iâll stay as long as you both need me.â
He nods, his expression thoughtful, and then softly says, âYouâre incredible.â
You shake your head, pouring the tea. âNot really. Just doing what anyone would.â
But deep down, you know thatâs not true. What youâre doing is more than just helping. Itâs being there, fully present in a way that neither Jisung nor Seyeon seem to take for granted. And as you set the tea in front of him, watching him take a slow sip, you realize that even amidst sickness, something beautiful is quietly blooming between the three of you.
The evening has settled in a quiet calm after the whirlwind of the day. Seyeon is tucked into her bed, her fever finally lowering thanks to the care and attention she received. You sit beside Jisung on the couch, his body still warm, though not as feverish as earlier.
âI should probably get going soon,â you say softly, your voice gentle as you glance toward him. âYou need rest too.â
Jisung leans back against the couch cushions, his eyes closing for a moment. âJust... a little longer,â he murmurs, his voice hoarse. âPlease?â
You hesitate, he looks so exhausted, so desperately in need of comfort, that you canât bring yourself to leave just yet. âOkay,â you whisper, settling beside him on his bed again. âJust for a bit.â
His room is quite big for the apartment that he has, he has a beautiful window that gives the view to the city, a walk-in wardrobe that you can bet filled with crazy outfits that he used for his idolâs life, so many guitars on the wall. And a picture of him, his little girl and probably the ex-wife under a cottage, heâs playing the guitar looking lovely at the mother of Seyeon with her on her lap â they look so.. happy to you.
He lets out a breath, visibly relaxing as you stay close. The warmth of your presence is grounding for him, a welcome relief from the chaos of the past few days.
âThank you,â he says quietly, his voice softer than before. âFor everything.â
You reach out instinctively, brushing a hand against his forehead to check his temperature again. âStill a bit warm,â you note, though itâs not dangerously high anymore. âBut at least your feverâs coming down.â
Jisung hums in agreement, his hand instinctively finding yours. His fingers lace with yours, squeezing gently as if grounding himself in your touch. He doesnât let go this time, his grip tightening ever so slightly as he leans into you, his head resting on your shoulder.
âItâs nice,â he murmurs softly. âHaving you here.â
The simple admission surprises you, but it doesnât feel awkward or forced. Instead, it feels natural, like two people seeking comfort in each otherâs presence without the need for words.
You smile softly, pressing a gentle kiss to his temple. âIâm not going anywhere.â
The silence stretches for a few moments, the world outside fading into the background. You run your fingers through his hair absentmindedly, soothing him in a way that feels effortless. His breathing slows, the warmth of his body against yours steadying with each passing second.
âStay with me tonight?â His voice is barely above a whisper, but the request is clear.
Your heart skips a beat, and though youâd considered leaving earlier, now the thought feels impossible. The tender moment shared between you, his vulnerability, the way he clings to you⊠it creates a sense of intimacy that feels more profound than anything youâve experienced before.
âWhat if Seyeon finds out that I am here? I donât want to hurt her,â you answer softly.
His arms moves around your waist, pulling you to sit on his lap, your hands still between his curls as his sick eyes find yours, âshe doesnât have to know, we will tell her that you came earlier than usual.â
His grip tightens just a little more. You lay back with him, your arm draped around his waist, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your fingertips.
Itâs quiet again, except for the occasional sound of his breathing slowing into a peaceful rhythm. You stay like that, cradling him in your care, the weight of the moment grounding and beautiful.
Jisung shifts slightly, his body instinctively seeking more comfort in the warmth of your presence. His head dips, and before you realize it, heâs nestled against your chest, his cheek pressed to the soft fabric of your shirt. His breathing is steady but heavy with exhaustion, the fever leaving him unusually vulnerable.
You stiffen for a moment, caught off guard by the intimacy of the gesture. But when you glance down and see his peaceful expressionâeyes closed, lips slightly parted, his lashes casting delicate shadows against his flushed cheeksâyou feel your heart soften.
âJisung,â you whisper gently, brushing your fingers through his hair to see if his fever has spiked again. His temperature is still warm but manageable, the worst of it seemingly passed for now.
Instead of waking, he hums softly, his hand gripping the fabric of your shirt as if heâs afraid youâll disappear if he lets go. The gesture tugs at your heartstrings, his vulnerability clear in the way he clings to you, seeking solace even in his sleep.
You sigh softly, wrapping your arms around him with a tenderness you didnât know you could offer so easily. âYouâre really something else,â you murmur, your lips curving into a gentle smile as you stroke his hair rhythmically.
His breathing evens out further, and the weight of his body against yours becomes a grounding comfort. As the moments pass, you lean your head back against the pillow, letting the quiet intimacy of the situation settle over you.
Itâs not what you expected when you agreed to stay, but now, with Jisung pressed close, his warmth radiating against you, it feels like exactly where youâre meant to be. You close your eyes, resting your chin lightly on the top of his head, and let the stillness carry you both into a rare and cherished peace.
The first rays of sunlight seep through the curtains, casting a soft golden glow over the room. You stir slightly, the ache in your back and the unfamiliar weight on your chest bringing you back to consciousness. Blinking a few times, you glance down and freeze.
Jisung is still draped over you, his head nestled against your chest, his arms loosely wrapped around your waist. His soft, even breaths tickle your skin, and his tousled hair brushes against your chin. Itâs a startlingly intimate position, and your cheeks flush as the reality of the situation sets in.
You try to move subtly, hoping not to wake him, but the slight shift causes him to stir. He groans softly, his face nuzzling against you like a contented cat seeking more warmth.
âJisung,â you whisper, your voice a mix of exasperation and embarrassment. âYouâre⊠still on top of me.â
He hums in response, clearly not fully awake. âHmm⊠comfy,â he mutters, his voice muffled against you.
You suppress a laugh, shaking your head as you gently pat his shoulder. âCome on, sleepyhead. Youâre crushing me.â
His eyes flutter open slowly, his gaze hazy and unfocused as he registers where he isâand more importantly, where you are. His face turns crimson in an instant, and he bolts upright, his disheveled hair only adding to the hilarity of the moment.
âOh my God,â he blurts out, his voice hoarse with lingering sleep. âIâIâm so sorry! I didnât mean toââ
You sit up too, waving a hand to stop him before he spirals into full-blown panic. âItâs fine, Jisung. You were sick, and we mustâve fallen asleep like that.â
He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, his ears still red. âStill⊠I shouldâve been more aware. Thatâs soââ
âUnexpected? Sure. But itâs not the end of the world,â you interrupt, giving him a teasing grin. âBesides, you were pretty cute all snuggled up like that.â
His jaw drops slightly, and he stares at you, completely flustered. âCute?! IânoâI meanââ
You laugh, the sound breaking through the awkward tension. âRelax, Jisung. Itâs not a big deal.â
Just then, a small voice calls out from down the hall.
âDaddy? Where are you?â
The two of you exchange wide-eyed looks before scrambling off the bed. Jisung fumbles to fix his hair and grab his hoodie while you quickly smooth down your clothes, both of you rushing to look presentable.
âIâll get her,â Jisung says, his voice still tinged with embarrassment, as he heads out of the room.
As you follow him, you canât help but smile at the ridiculousness of the situation. Despite the awkwardness, thereâs an undeniable warmth that lingers between youâa connection that feels stronger than before. And as Seyeonâs giggles echo through the apartment, you realize that, awkward or not, this is exactly where you want to be.
As Jisung steps into the hallway, he quickly motions for you to follow him into the living room. His expression is one of barely concealed panic.
"Okay but," he whispers, running a hand through his messy hair. "We need a story. Seyeon canât know we both slept in my room. Sheâll definitely tell her mom, and... yeah, letâs avoid that."
You stifle a laugh, appreciating the sheer absurdity of the situation. âAlright, whatâs the plan?â
Jisung glances toward Seyeonâs room, where her little voice is calling out again, a clear mix of curiosity and impatience. He thinks for a moment before his eyes light up. âWeâll say you arrived really early to check on her, and I was still half-asleep when you got here.â
You arch an eyebrow. âHalf-asleep and on top of me?â
He groans, his ears turning red. âDetails she doesnât need to know!â He waves his hands, flustered. âJust... sit on the couch and act like you just got here. Iâll handle the rest.â
Rolling your eyes but unable to resist the humor of the moment, you grab your bag from where it had been discarded the night before and plop yourself on the couch. You pull out your phone to make it look like youâve been sitting there for a while.
âDaddy?â Seyeonâs voice is louder now as she pads into the living room in her pajamas, her bunny clutched in her arms. Her sleepy eyes widen slightly when she spots you. ây/nie! Youâre here!â
You give her a warm smile, waving as if this is the most normal morning ever. âMorning, sweet cheeks. I came early to check on you and Daddy. How are you feeling?â
Seyeon blinks at you, her expression curious. âBut I didnât hear the doorbellâŠâ
Jisung swoops in at that exact moment, his hoodie slightly askew and his hair still a mess. âThatâs because Daddy let y/n in while you were still asleep, princess,â he says smoothly, crouching down to give her a hug. âShe wanted to make sure you were feeling better.â
Seyeon narrows her eyes at him suspiciously, her tiny hands on her hips. âWhy is your hair so messy, Daddy?â
Jisung freezes for a split second before letting out an overly dramatic yawn. âOh, thatâs because I just woke up too! I was soooo tired after yesterday, remember?â He ruffles her hair playfully, distracting her as he stands. âBut look at youâstill the cutest little bean even when youâre sick.â
Seyeon giggles, her suspicions forgotten for the moment as she climbs onto the couch beside you. âAre you gonna stay with us today, y/n?â
You glance at Jisung, who gives you a grateful look over Seyeonâs head. âOf course,â you reply with a smile, brushing a strand of hair from her face. âYou and Daddy need someone to take care of you, donât you?â
Seyeon nods eagerly, her little hands clutching yours. âYes! Daddy is really bad at making soup.â
âHey!â Jisung protests, but his playful tone makes you laugh.
As the three of you settle into the morning routine, the chaos of the earlier situation melts away. Jisung catches your eye every now and then, a mix of gratitude and amusement in his expression. And though the morning started with a flurry of awkwardness and quick thinking, itâs clear that neither of you would trade this for anything.
ây/n,â she says after a moment, her little voice breaking the quiet. âDo you know how to make pancakes?â
You glance over your shoulder with a smile. âI do, but I think soup is better for you today, sweet cheeks. Pancakes can wait until youâre all better.â
Seyeon pouts, but itâs short-lived as Jisung shuffles in, still looking half-asleep despite his attempt to pull himself together. He leans against the counter, his hoodie slightly crooked, and watches you with a soft, almost shy smile.
âYou didnât have to do all this,â he murmurs as you stir the soup.
You wave him off. âI told you, youâre both sick. Somebody has to take care of you.â
Seyeon pipes up from the table. ây/n is the best at taking care of people, Daddy. You should hire her forever!â
Jisung chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. âWeâll see, princess. For now, I think weâre lucky sheâs here at all.â
You finish the soup and serve it up, sitting beside Seyeon to make sure she eats slowly. She chatters between spoonfuls, her energy already bouncing back, though she still has a telltale flush on her cheeks from the fever.
After breakfast, Jisung retreats to the couch, looking utterly exhausted but refusing to admit it. You catch him trying to sit up and work on his laptop, which you promptly take away from him.
âAbsolutely not,â you scold, folding your arms. âBack to bed, Mr. Producer. Youâre supposed to be resting, not working.â
âButââ
âNo buts.â You place your hands on your hips, glaring down at him. âYouâre lucky I donât confiscate your phone too.â
Seyeon comes from behind her legs with a smirk and a playful voice, âohoh, Daddyâs in trouble.â
Jisung gives you a sheepish smile, holding his hands up in surrender. âAlright, alright. You win.â
He stands, but his movements are sluggish, his fever still lingering. You guide him back to his bedroom, where he collapses onto the bed with a dramatic groan.
âThis feels like a punishment,â he grumbles, though thereâs no real bite in his tone.
âItâs for your own good,â you reply, pulling the blanket over him. âNow stay put.â
As you turn to leave, he reaches out, his fingers lightly catching your wrist. ây/n,â he says softly, his voice tinged with vulnerability. âThank you. Really.â
You smile down at him, your heart softening at the sight of his tired but grateful expression. âGet some rest, Jisung. Thatâs all the thanks I need.â
When you leave the room, you find Seyeon curled up on the couch, already half-asleep with her bunny tucked under her chin. You drape a blanket over her and settle into the armchair nearby, the apartment finally quiet and peaceful.
The rest of the day passes quietly, with Seyeon resting on the couch and Jisung finally succumbing to sleep in his room. You tidy up the kitchen, check on both of them periodically, and eventually find a moment to sit and relax yourself. As you scroll absentmindedly on your phone, a text notification pops up.
Jisung:Â Hey. Are you still here, or did you head out while I was knocked out?
You smile, shaking your head as you type back.
You:Â Still here. Seyeonâs asleep on the couch. Iâll head out soon.
A minute later, another text buzzes in.
Jisung:Â Youâve been amazing today. Seriously, I donât even know how to thank you.
You:Â I told you, no thanks needed. Just get better, both of you.
Thereâs a longer pause this time, and you wonder if heâs fallen asleep again. But then your phone buzzes once more.
Jisung:Â What if I wanted to thank you by taking you out? Like... on a date.
Your heart skips a beat, your thumb hovering over the keyboard as you reread the message. Is he serious? Judging by the second text that quickly follows, heâs just as nervous as you are.
Jisung:Â Unless thatâs weird. Is that weird? I feel like Iâm making this weird. Forget I said anything.
You canât help but laugh, imagining his flustered expression.
You:Â Itâs not weird. Iâd like that.
The three dots indicating his reply appear almost immediately.
Jisung:Â Really? Okay. Great. When?
You glance toward the couch where Seyeon is still snoozing and back at your phone.
You:Â Letâs wait until youâre fully recovered, okay? I donât want to be on a date with a guy who canât keep his head up.
Jisung:Â Fair point. But itâs a deal. As soon as Iâm better.
A week later, Jisung texts you with a time and location. He insists on keeping it a surprise, though he assures you it wonât be anything too fancy. When the evening arrives, you find yourself standing outside a cozy, tucked-away bistro in Seoul. The warm glow of fairy lights strung above the outdoor seating area adds a touch of magic to the atmosphere.
Jisung is already waiting for you, looking much healthierâand much more nervous. Heâs dressed casually but thoughtfully, his hoodie swapped for a well-fitted sweater and jeans. His smile when he spots you is enough to make your heart skip.
âYou look amazing,â he says, his eyes softening as he takes you in.
âThanks,â you reply, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. âYou look pretty great yourself.â
He opens the door for you, leading you inside where the smell of freshly baked bread and herbs fills the air. The restaurant is intimate, with only a handful of tables and soft jazz playing in the background.
As you and Jisung settle at your table, the restaurant's warm ambiance makes you feel at ease. A candle flickers between you, its soft glow casting gentle shadows across his face. He looks relaxed, his posture leaning slightly forward as he glances at the menu.
âThis place is beautiful,â you remark, taking in the quaint decorâexposed brick walls, wooden beams, and vintage artwork.
Jisung smiles, his eyes flickering up to meet yours. âI thought youâd like it. Itâs one of my favorite spots, but I havenât had a reason to come here in a while.â
A waiter arrives, pouring water into delicate glasses and handing you menus. Jisung grins as he watches you scan the options. âWhat are you thinking of getting?â
âHm, probably the pasta,â you say, biting your lip as you deliberate. âWhat about you?â
âThe steak,â he says without hesitation, then chuckles. âSeyeon would roll her eyes if she saw me order it. She keeps trying to convince me to go vegetarian.â
You laugh at the thought. âSheâs quite the little advocate. Howâs that going for you?â
âLetâs just say Iâve perfected the art of sneaking bacon into my meals when sheâs not looking,â he admits with a mischievous grin.
Youâre both laughing when the waiter returns to take your orders, and as the night unfolds, the conversation deepens.
Jisung leans on his hand, watching you with a softness that makes your cheeks warm. âSo, what made you want to work with kids?â
You shrug, swirling your water glass idly. âIâve always liked working with kids. Theyâre honest in a way adults sometimes arenât, you know? And they remind me to find joy in little things.â
His gaze doesnât waver, and for a moment, you feel a little self-conscious under his attention. âThatâs exactly what Seyeon needed,â he says. âSheâs been through so much for someone her age, and Iâve worried about her losing that joy. Youâve brought it back.â
You smile softly. âSheâs a great kid, Jisung. Youâve done an amazing job with her.â
He shakes his head, his expression a mix of humility and gratitude. âIâve tried, but thereâs always this part of me that worries Iâm not enough for her. Especially with everything between her mom and me.â
The vulnerability in his voice tugs at your heart. âYouâre more than enough. Seyeon adores you. And the fact that you care so much says everything.â
He looks at you for a long moment, then smiles, a quiet kind of relief in his eyes.
The dishes arrive, breaking the tender atmosphere, and you both dive into your meals. The food is incredible, and the easy banter resumes. Jisung insists you try a bite of his steak, holding a piece out on his fork with an exaggerated flourish.
âFine,â you say, laughing as you lean forward to take it. The steak practically melts in your mouth. âOkay, thatâs ridiculously good.â
âTold you,â he says with a wink, taking a triumphant bite.
You share stories from your past, from embarrassing childhood moments to your favorite memories, and Jisung counters with tales from his idol days.
âWait, you seriously tripped on stage during a live broadcast?â you ask, trying and failing to hold back your laughter.
âOh, not just tripped,â he says, groaning dramatically. âI wiped out. Full face-plant. The members wouldnât let me live it down for months.â
By the time dessert rolls aroundâan indulgent chocolate lava cake you decide to splitâyou feel like youâve known him forever.
âOkay, honest question,â Jisung says, wiping a bit of chocolate from the corner of his mouth. âIf you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?â
You think for a moment before answering. âSomewhere quiet, with a lot of nature. Maybe near the ocean. What about you?â
He pauses, his gaze thoughtful. âHonestly? Wherever Seyeon is. Sheâs my world.â Then, after a beat, he adds, âBut having someone like you there wouldnât hurt either.â
The sincerity in his voice catches you off guard, and you feel your cheeks heat again.
The conversation lingers even after the plates are cleared, neither of you in a hurry to end the night. When the check arrives, Jisung snatches it before you can protest, giving you a playful glare.
âDonât even try,â he says. âThis is my treat.â
By the time dinner is over, the warmth between you feels almost tangible. Jisung insists on walking you home, the cool night air brushing against your skin as you stroll side by side.
When you reach your door, he hesitates, his hands tucked into his pockets. âI had a really great time tonight,â he says, his voice soft.
âMe too,â you reply, smiling up at him.
Thereâs a brief pause, and then he steps closer, his gaze flicking to your lips. âIs it okay if Iââ
Before he can finish the question, you lean in, closing the distance. His lips are warm and soft against yours, the kiss sweet and unhurried, a perfect culmination of the night.
When you pull back, his cheeks are pink, but the smile on his face is radiant.
âGoodnight, y/n,â he murmurs, his voice full of promise.
âGoodnight, Jisung,â you reply, already looking forward to whatâs to come.
A few days after your magical date with Jisung, your phone buzzes while youâre at home. Itâs a text from him.
Jisung:Â Hey, no pressure, but the guys are getting together for dinner this weekend. Iâd love for you to come along.
You read the message a couple of times, your heart fluttering.
You: Are you sure? I mean, isnât that likeâŠa big deal?
Jisung:Â Itâs not a big deal! Well, okay, maybe it is a little, but only because I want them to meet you. Theyâre like family to me.
You:Â And youâre sure they wonât think itâs weird?
Jisung:Â baby, theyâre going to love you. Trust me. Besides, itâll be fun. Casual. No pressure.
You:Â Okay. Letâs do it.
The evening of the dinner, Jisung picks you up, visibly excited. âYou look amazing,â he says, grinning as you slide into his car. âYouâre going to fit right in.â
The dinner is at a trendy Korean BBQ restaurant, and the private room is already lively when you arrive. The other members of Jisungâs former group greet you warmly, their energy filling the space.
âGuys, this is y/n,â Jisung says, his arm resting lightly on your back. Then, with a small but unmistakable smile, he adds, âMy girlfriend.â
You feel a collective shift in the room as all eyes turn to you, surprise quickly morphing into grins and playful teasing.
âGirlfriend?â Chan, the leader, says, raising an eyebrow at Jisung. âSince when?â
âSince recently,â Jisung replies, his tone casual but his expression soft as he looks at you.
âWow, finally! I thought this day would never come,â Changbin teases, earning a laugh from everyone, including you.
âOkay, okay, donât scare her off,â Jisung says, laughing as he guides you to a seat beside him.
As the night goes on, the atmosphere grows more relaxed. The members share hilarious stories from their time as a group, complete with impressions and exaggerated reenactments.
âDid he tell you about the time he lost his pants on stage?â Hyunjin asks, a mischievous glint in his eye.
âHyunjin!â Jisung protests, his face turning bright red.
âOh, please, you have to tell me now,â you say, laughing.
Jisung groans dramatically, covering his face as Hyunjin dives into the story, complete with theatrical flair.
When itâs your turn to share something about yourself, they listen intently, occasionally throwing in jokes that make everyone laugh. You can tell how much they care for Jisung, and their approval feels like a warm embrace.
âYouâre really good for him,â Chan says quietly as the others are distracted grilling meat. His kind smile reassures you. âHeâs been happier lately. Thank you for that.â
You glance at Jisung, whoâs laughing at something Seungmin just said, and feel a wave of affection. âHe makes me happy too,â you reply honestly.
The teasing began almost as soon as Changbin noticed how attentive Jisung was being to you throughout the dinner. Whether it was making sure you had enough food or leaning in to whisper something funny in your ear, it was clear Jisung was smittenâand Changbin wasnât going to let that slide unnoticed.
As the group grilled meat and exchanged banter, Changbin raised an eyebrow at Jisung, smirking. âYou know, Jisung, itâs funnyâŠâ he began, drawing the attention of everyone at the table.
Jisung immediately tensed, a cautious look flashing across his face. âWhatâs funny?â he asked warily.
Changbin gestured toward you with his chopsticks. âJust how different y/n is from your ex. I mean, not to stir the pot or anythingââ
âThen donât,â Jisung interjected, though his tone lacked bite.
But Changbin wasnât stopping. ââbut seriously! Like night and day. y/nâs relaxed, fun, down-to-earthâŠâ He trailed off with a playful shrug, his grin growing.
The table erupted in laughter, though you felt a little heat creep into your cheeks. You glanced at Jisung, who was glaring at Changbin with mock annoyance, his ears turning red.
âYah, Changbin-hyung,â Jisung said, pointing his chopsticks at him. âYou donât have to point it out like that.â
âOh, come on, itâs a compliment,â Changbin said with a laugh, raising his hands in mock defense. âIâm just saying you clearly upgraded. Donât act like you donât know it.â
âHyungâs glowing,â Felix chimed in with a cheeky grin, piling on the teasing.
âDonât make me regret inviting you all,â Jisung muttered, though the corners of his lips twitched in amusement.
You decided to jump in, hoping to lighten the moment. âI donât know if I should be flattered or slightly concerned about how much youâre comparing me to her,â you joked, earning more laughter from the group.
Changbin laughed the hardest. âNo, no, you should definitely be flattered. Heâs happier than Iâve seen him in years.â
Jisung sighed dramatically, pinching the bridge of his nose. âIâm never hearing the end of this, am I?â
âNot a chance,â Seungmin replied with his trademark deadpan humor, making everyone laugh again.
Despite the teasing, you could feel the warmth in the room, the genuine affection Jisungâs friends had for himâand, by extension, for you. As Jisung reached under the table to squeeze your hand, his shy smile told you he didnât mind the jokes as much as he let on.
Later, as you were leaving, Jisung shook his head, muttering, âChangbinâs never going to let me live that down.â
The car ride back to Jisungâs apartment was quiet, the hum of the engine filling the space between you. The earlier teasing and laughter had dimmed, replaced by a thoughtful silence that neither of you rushed to break.
Finally, you glanced over at him. âYou donât have to answer if you donât want to,â you started softly, your voice gentle. âBut⊠how did things end with your ex?â
Jisungâs grip on the steering wheel tightened slightly. He looked straight ahead, his expression unreadable for a moment before speaking. âIt wasnât easy,â he said quietly. âNothing about it was.â
You gave him a moment, waiting patiently. âWe were young when we met. Fell in love quickly. For a while, it was perfect. We supported each other through everythingâthe good and the bad. But⊠the more I focused on my career, the more she felt like she was losing herself.â
You could see the pain flicker in his eyes as he said it, the weight of those words hanging between you.
âItâs hard, when two people are going in different directions,â he continued, his voice a little hoarse. âThe distance, the misunderstandingsâit felt like the walls were closing in. Eventually, we stopped talking as much. Stopped seeing each other the way we once did.â
You reached out, lightly placing a hand on his knee. âThat mustâve been really painful,â you said softly. âTo watch something you both built fall apart.â
Jisung let out a breath, his shoulders relaxing under your touch. âIt was. Still is, sometimes. But⊠we werenât right for each other. And Seyeon deserved more stability, more love than we could give her when we were barely holding on ourselves.â
The honesty in his voice cut through the tension in the car, and you felt a deep sympathy for the man who had carried so much weight for so long. âYouâre doing your best,â you said gently. âFor both of them.â
He glanced at you, offering a small smile, though it didnât quite reach his eyes. âI try.â
You gave his knee a squeeze, the touch offering comfort, though the quiet that followed was heavier now. It wasnât an easy conversation, but you felt like you understood a little more of Jisungâthe man behind the laughter, behind the fame.
After a while, he spoke again, softer this time. âI donât talk about her often. Seyeon means everything to me. Sheâs my world now. And I donât regret how things turned out, even if it hurt.â
âI know,â you said, your voice barely a whisper. âBut itâs okay to talk about it. You donât have to carry it all alone.â
He nodded slightly, his fingers drumming softly against the steering wheel. âItâs just⊠hard sometimes. Seeing how happy Seyeon is now, and knowing that the woman who helped create her is still part of the equation. Itâs not simple.â
âNo, itâs not,â you agreed. âBut youâre doing better than you think.â
The rest of the drive was quieter, the words exchanged grounding but still heavy with emotion. You didnât need to fill the silence. Just being there was enough.
When you arrived at his apartment, Jisung reached for your hand, holding it tightly as you both stepped out of the car. The weight of the conversation lingered, but there was something tender in the way he looked at you.
The door to Jisungïżœïżœïżœs apartment creaked open slowly, and your heart immediately sank when you stepped inside. The tension in the air was thick, palpable even before you saw them. Voicesâraised, angryâechoed from down the hall.
âNo, Jisung! You canât just bring her into our lives like this!â
It was her, you couldâve tell by the long thick brown hair and her slim body. Seyeonâs mother. Her voice sharp, filled with frustration, and a trace of betrayal.
Jisungâs voice followed, equally firm and unyielding. âSheâs part of Seyeonâs life. Sheâs part of mine now too. You donât get to control that anymore.â
You froze by the entrance, uncertainty washing over you. You could hear Seyeonâs soft cries from her room, the sound barely audible through the tense exchange. She mustâve heard everything.
This isnât how I wanted it to start, you thought, your grip tightening on your bag.
The apartment felt suffocating. Every word was a blow, a crack in something fragile. They had been separated for years, and yet the wounds still ran deep.
âYouâre being selfish!â her voice snapped. âYou didnât even consult me! Sheâs a nanny, Jisung! A stranger! Youâre bringing her into her life without thinkingâwithout even telling me!â
âI did think about it!â Jisung shouted back, his voice raising with every word. âI thought about whatâs best for Seyeon. And if that means bringing y/n into our world, then so be it. Iâm not going to hide who she is anymore.â
The tension in the room crackled, a storm brewing that neither of them seemed ready to weather.
You felt like an intruder, standing there in the doorway, unable to move, unable to escape the weight of it all. This wasnât supposed to be your roleâcaught between two parents who were struggling to put their differences aside.
Finally, Jisungâs voice lowered, softer but no less fierce. âThis isnât about me or you anymore. Itâs about her. About Seyeon. And she deserves to be happy, to feel safeâwhether thatâs with me or with you.â
A heavy silence fell over the apartment, the kind that left no room for words. You could hear the trembling breaths of both Jisung and Seyeonâs mother, neither one backing down, neither one willing to compromise.
âIâm not here to take her place,â you said softly, stepping forward into the hallway. âIâm here for Seyeon. She needs stability, and I want to be a part of that. But Iâm not here to replace anyone.â
Both their eyes snapped to you, the weight of your words landing between them.
Jisungâs mother softened slightly at your presence, though her gaze was still sharp. âAnd what happens when this⊠arrangement falls apart? Youâll leave too? Like everyone else?â
âIâm not going anywhere,â you replied, holding her gaze steadily. âIâm here as long as Seyeon needs me. And if thatâs what Jisung and I decide, then Iâll be here. Itâs not about me; itâs about her.â
Another beat of silence followed. Jisung stepped closer to you, his hand briefly finding yours in a gesture of quiet support.
Seyeonâs mother exhaled slowly, her anger subdued but not gone. âYou have no idea how complicated this is,â she finally said, her voice low and weary. âAnd maybe⊠maybe youâre right. Maybe Seyeon does need more than just a father or a mother. But this isnât what I imagined for her. Not this.â
Jisung nodded solemnly, his jaw tight. âI know. But we donât always get to choose how life turns out. The only thing I want is for her to be happy. Thatâs all.â
Seyeonâs soft sniffles turned into quiet whimpers from her room, and Jisungâs motherâs face softened slightly at the sound. âSheâs scared,â she said quietly, her voice trembling. âSheâs hearing all of this. She doesnât understand.â
Jisungâs eyes closed for a moment, his breath hitching slightly. âI know. I know. And I hate this more than anything. But sheâll get through it. Weâll get through it.â
A final, heavy pause hung in the air before Seyeonâs mother spoke again. âYouâd better hope this works, Jisung. Because if it doesnâtâŠâ
âI know,â he interrupted, voice steady despite the tremor in his hands. âI know.â
She turned, walking toward Seyeonâs room, knocking softly on the door. âSeyeon, itâs mommy,â she said gently, her voice wavering. âCan I come in?â
The little girlâs hesitant voice responded from behind the door, but it was barely audible. âNo, mommy. I wanna stay with daddyâŠâ
Jisungâs face tightened, the raw pain evident as he looked toward the door. Without another word, Seyeonâs mother left the apartment, closing the door softly behind her. The silence that followed was deafening.
Jisung leaned against the wall, his breath shaky, and you approached him carefully. âShe didnât mean what she said,â you said softly, your hand resting on his arm. âSheâs just scared.â
âI know,â Jisung murmured, pressing his forehead against the cool wall, his voice hoarse. âBut it hurts. More than I ever thought it would.â
You wrapped your arms around him tightly, holding him close, letting him feel the comfort you could give, even if it wasnât enough. âYouâre doing everything you can. For both of them.â
Together, you stood there, the weight of the moment pressing down on you both. Seyeonâs cries continued softly from her room, and you knew that healing would be a long, painful journeyâone neither of you could rush.
The night was long and heavy. Jisung sat by Seyeonâs room, occasionally knocking softly to check on her, but she never answered. The pain of her confusion and fear was palpable, even from the other side of the door.
You stood quietly in the living room, watching him from a distance. The man who had always seemed so composed, so in control, was unraveling. His shoulders sagged, his head hanging low as he struggled with the weight of the situation. You knew how much Seyeon meant to him, and seeing him like this, broken yet determined, tugged at your heart.
Finally, after what felt like hours, he broke the silence. âShe doesnât want me to go in,â Jisung said, his voice low and strained. âShe doesnât want to see me.â
You walked over to him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. âYou canât force her, Jisung. She needs time.â
He nodded, swallowing hard. âI know. I justââ His voice cracked, and for a moment, he couldnât finish his thought. âI feel helpless.â
âYouâre not,â you assured him quietly. âYouâre doing everything right. She knows you love her.â
Jisung let out a breath, leaning back against the wall. âI keep thinking about what I couldâve done differentlyâwhat I shouldâve done. Maybe if we hadnât fought like that, she wouldnât be so scared.â
You knelt down in front of him, forcing him to look at you. âNo oneâs perfect, Jisung. Youâre doing everything you can. And thatâs enough.â
A small smile broke through his pain, though it was bittersweet. âYouâre too good to me.â
You squeezed his hand softly, a comforting gesture that spoke volumes without words. âBecause you deserve it.â
His hands moves on your cheeks gently, cupping your face and bring it close to his, his lips ghosting yours for a moment before his mouth collide against you gently - but fill with passion. He's in a pure need of attention and gentle touches. You kiss him back with the same feeling because you are slowly realising how much you are in love with this man.
As the kiss continue, as your lips keeps going for his, his hands slips on the back pocket of your jeans making you squirm a little against his lips, "J-jisung.."
"Please."
"Not now okay?" you coo as your thumb brush against his bottom lip gently, for how badly you want his hands on you, the moment is not the best. He press his lips together before pressing them gently against your thumb. "Okay, you're right."
The night dragged on, the quiet moments shared between you filled with unspoken understanding. You sat together in the dim glow of the living room lamp, sharing stories and reminiscing about simpler times, anything to ease the tension between you.
As the sky began to lighten with the first rays of dawn, Jisung finally spoke again. âShe still doesnât want to see me. But maybe⊠if she sees you here with me, sheâll feel safe enough to come out.â
You squeezed his hand gently. âIâll be here. For both of you.â
He nodded slowly, a sense of peace washing over him at your words. Even in the quiet of the morning, the weight of the previous night hadnât completely lifted, but it was a step forwardâhowever small.
Just as the sun started to rise, a soft shuffle came from Seyeonâs room. Her small voice called out quietly, unsure yet hopeful. âDaddy?â
Jisungâs breath hitched, and without thinking, he moved toward the door. âSweetcheeks?â
Slowly, the door creaked open, revealing a timid, tear-streaked face. Her motherâs protective instincts were evident, but her little eyes searched for something familiarâsomething safe.
âCome here, sweet girl,â Jisung whispered, his voice gentle and full of love. He knelt down, opening his arms wide, and Seyeon stepped into them hesitantly. He wrapped her up in a tight embrace, her tiny arms clinging to him like a lifeline.
âI was scared,â she murmured against his shoulder, her voice barely audible.
âI know, baby,â Jisung said softly, rocking her gently. âBut youâre safe now. Youâre with me.â
You watched from a distance, your heart swelling with emotion. Watching Jisung finally connect with his daughter after the turmoil gave you a sense of purpose that was hard to explain. He deserved to be her rock, just as she deserved to lean on him.
After a few moments, Seyeon lifted her head, her tear-streaked face searching for yours. ây/n,â she said softly, her small voice tinged with curiosity. âYou stayed?â
You smiled warmly, crouching down to her level. âOf course I did, sweetie. I told you, Iâm here for both of you.â
Itâs almost midnight of a random Wednesday when your phone buzz with a jisungâs text asking you to come to his apartment for a small stay in date, youâre over the edge. You missed him, you missed your boyfriend because the last week you couldnât see him â he was too busy working, Seyeon stayed with her mother an addictional weekend and your essays were one on top of the other in your desk. So when he asked you to be there in 10 minutes, you were already taking the bus to his house. You didnât dressed up, you just casually put a comfortable sweater on and a skirt just how he seems to like you.
When you knock at the door his happy smile makes you feel immidiately at home. âHey, beautiful,â Jisung greets, leaning against the doorframe with a playful smirk. His messy hair and soft hoodie make him look effortlessly perfect, and the way his eyes rake over you sends a shiver down your spine. âYou didnât make me wait long, did you?â
You roll your eyes but canât stop the grin spreading across your face. âNot everyone has the luxury of teleporting, Sungie. The bus takes time.â
He chuckles, stepping aside to let you in. âYou couldâve run here. I wouldâve been worth it.â
His teasing tone is matched with a flirtatious glance, and before you can come up with a witty reply, his hands find your waist as soon as the door closes. He pulls you in, the familiar warmth of his touch melting away the stress of your week. His lips brush your temple, then your cheek, lingering just enough to make your heartbeat quicken.
âYou smell like heaven,â he murmurs, his voice low and velvety. His lips find your ear, and you swear you can feel his smile. âAnd you look even better than I imagined.â
Your face heats up as you lightly shove his chest. âyouâre saying this knowing damn well how I loove.â
He catches your hands and holds them against his chest, his grin widening. âmaybe yes, maybe no. Thatâs up to you.â
The warmth in his eyes makes your knees weak, but before you can drown in his gaze, he tugs you further inside. The living room is dimly lit, fairy lights draped across the walls casting a soft glow over the space. A cozy blanket is spread across the couch, and the coffee table holds a bottle of soda â because he knows you donât like to drink and he secretly appreciate that, two glasses, and a bowl of popcorn.
Jisung notices your eyes scanning the setup and tugs at your hand to pull you closer. âNothing fancy,â he says, feigning nonchalance, âbut I figured you deserve a little break. Just us, we didnât had that many dates due my schedules and your exams.â
Your heart swells as he leads you to the couch. The air between you is thick with anticipation, his hand lingering on yours as you sit. He leans in close, his knee brushing against yours. âSo,â he starts, his voice dropping an octave, âhow much did you miss me?â
You try to stay composed, but his proximity and the mischievous glint in his eye make it impossible. âEnough to take the bus at almost midnight,â you reply, meeting his gaze.
His smile turns sly as he shifts even closer, his lips mere inches from yours. âOnly enough for that?â he teases, his voice a breathy whisper. âGuess Iâll have to work harder to make you miss me more.â
Before you can answer, his hand cups your cheek, and he closes the distance between you. His lips are soft and warm, moving against yours with a tenderness that quickly turns intoxicating. The world outside fades away as you lose yourself in himâhis touch, his scent, the way he tastes like home.
When he finally pulls back, just enough to rest his forehead against yours, his voice is husky. âYouâre mine tonight. No essays, no kids, no stressâjust us. Deal?â
You nod, breathless, already sinking into the haven heâs created. âDeal.â
Jisung smiles against your lips as you kiss him again, his hands still cradling your face like youâre the most delicate thing in the world. He pulls back just far enough to see your flushed cheeks and dazed expression, his own grin soft and full of affection.
âCome on,â he murmurs, his thumb brushing over your cheek.
He leads you to the couch, settling you into the corner where the blankets are piled. He sits down beside you and pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as if heâs trying to shield you from the rest of the world. The faint hum of the fairy lights fills the air, along with the soft rustle of the blanket as he tucks it over both of you.
You relax against him, your head naturally finding its place on his chest. His heartbeat is steady beneath your ear, and the familiar scent of his cologne mixed with his own warmth makes you sigh in contentment. He leans down, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead.
The two of you stay like that for a while, wrapped up in each other, the outside world a distant memory. Jisung shifts slightly, adjusting the blanket and pulling you closer, his fingers now absentmindedly running through your hair.
âWhat are we watching?â you ask eventually, your voice muffled against his chest.
He chuckles softly, his chest vibrating against you. âNothing yet. I got too distracted by you.â
You playfully swat his side, but he only laughs, pulling you even closer. âAlright, alright,â he relents, reaching for the remote. âLetâs pick something cozy. Youâre the boss tonight.â
You glance at the screen as he scrolls through the options, his free hand never leaving your waist. After some debate, you settle on a rom-com, one of your favorites that he insists heâs never seen but secretly knows by heart.
As the movie plays, Jisungâs commentary is both endearing and hilarious, his whispered quips earning giggles from you that he seems determined to keep coming. When you laugh too hard, he presses a kiss to your temple, his lips lingering as he whispers, âI love that sound.â
His lips find your neck, leaving soft pecks long the way, your hands instinctively clutch at his hoodie as his lips find your neck, pressing soft, deliberate kisses that make your heart race. He takes his time, his touch unhurried, as if savoring every second. When he reaches the curve where your neck meets your shoulder, he lingers, his lips brushing over your skin with maddening gentleness.
âYou smell so good,â he murmurs against your neck, his voice a low rasp that sends a thrill down your spine. His teeth graze your skin lightly, and your grip on his hoodie tightens.
âJisung,â you say again, your voice a mix of a plea and a warning. He chuckles softly, the sound vibrating against your neck.
âWhat?â he asks, feigning innocence as his lips press another kiss just below your collarbone. âIâm just making up for lost time.â
You tilt your head slightly, giving him more access despite yourself. His hands slide to your waist, steadying you as he continues to kiss and nuzzle your neck. Each press of his lips feels like fire and electricity, sending sparks through your entire body.
âMissed you,â he whispers, his voice barely audible. The tenderness in his words is enough to make your heart clench, and you canât help but pull him closer.
âI missed you too,â you admit, your fingers tangling in his hair. He lifts his head just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes dark and filled with affectionâand something more.
âYouâre so beautiful,â he says softly, his thumb brushing against your cheek as he leans in to kiss you again, this time on your lips. Itâs slow and deliberate, a kiss that feels like a promise.Â
Your hands slips on the elm of his hoodie, removing it from his body and you cannoât stop looking. The tattoos on his torso are incredibly attractive, broad shoulders, thin waist adorned with prominent abdominal muscles, before reaching a v-line that leads into his boxers. Youâre wide eyed, youâre fingers are itching to touch his toned skin, âdamn.â
He shrugs nonchalantly, crossing his arms over his chest. âare you that surprised?â
âwell yeah for your age-â You smirk causing him to pout. âhey!â
His arms moves around your waist, lifting you from the ground and placing your stomach against his shoulder, you kicks lightly your legs in the air, âJisung you better put me down!â
Giggles fills the apartment as he hold you with an arm around your waist and the other patting playfully your ass, ânah, I can carry you easily like this.â
âButââ
âNo buts, youâre not a kid and tonight youâre my girl to pleasure.â His words are warm and they make you blush when you step into his room, a smile growing in your lips and another laugh left your lungs when he kindly let you lay on the bed, your back against the sheets that smells like him.
âYou areââ he swallow lightly, his fingers tracing the elm of your shorts, âbeautiful. Breathtaking.âÂ
Your clothes end up quickly on the floor, his hands roaming all over your body, tracing your skin and trying to get every single part touched by him, he wants you to forget about the past partners and remember only him. Him and his smile, him and his giggles, his soft and kind voice.Â
The arch of your back makes him shiver, itâs a scene of a movie, his index trace from between your breasts to the sweet roll of your tummy, making you chuckle, âare you having fun?â
âVery. And you?â His eyes looks for confirm, your nods is enough for his finger to run over your belly button. Heâs teasing you, you can tell. It tickles you. âJisung donât tease me.â
âWhat they say? waiting increases desire,â You roll his eyes at your boyfriendâs smirk.
âYou say that to your kid,â he squeeze his eyes a little, shaking his head quickly almost to remove a thought from his mind, âdonât.. donât say that!â
A small noise of surprise falls from your lips, just as he lean to kiss you softly to shut you up â he need more. The hand on your waist pulls you closer and at the same time, he presses his lips harder against yours. His lips mold into yours, spit gathering in his mouth from hunger.Â
His hands spread apart your legs wide, making you squeak at the sudden action, his hands grips your hips raising them enough for his dick to rub against your folds, âyouâre teasing me again.â
Your purrs makes his skin shivers, âdo you want me that bad?â he bend over you, his nose nudge against yours gently as you smile, the intimacy of the moment makes your pussy get wetter. Â
His hands grip your waist tightly as he feels your wet heat taking him inch by inch, âFuuuuck, how many times have I dreamt about this?â He hiss, youâre absolutely enjoying this.Â
Jisung is stretching you out so good, as his cock is rubbing over that sweet spot inside you. Heâs enjoying the view, youâre hidden eyes, the way your tits are bouncing when he push deeper in you. Itâs been a while since he fucked someone and it felt this good, itâs really hard for him to not come yet.
âIâm so close.. jisung.â Youâre moans filled his room, your head moved backward making him grunt under his breath, he pulls out stroking his shaft in a rough manner, âno.. no cum inside.â
âA-are you sure?â Your hand reach for his tip gently, brushing the tip with his thumb making his hips moving forward for his touch, you guide his cock back inside you, your walls squeezing him again as he start to thrust into you faster than before, rougher, raw. Itâs a feeling that makes your feel full, the light bulge in your low stomach makes him with a cocky smirk, âoh look how deep I am.â
He brushes his fingers over your skin, making you whimper, your legs tight around his waist, âo-oh Godâ Jisung..â Your legs shakes in pleasure as he cums deep in you, his forehead resting against your shoulder.
He slowly moves to lay beside you, trying to catch some breath after the intensity of your love making. The room is bathed in a warm, golden glow from the bedside lamp as you and Jisung lay tangled together beneath the covers. His arm is draped lazily around your waist, his fingers drawing absentminded circles on your skin. You feel utterly at peace, your head resting on his chest, his heartbeat a steady rhythm against your ear.
But then, he breaks the silence with a dramatic sigh.
âY/n,â he says, his voice filled with mock seriousness. âI need to tell you something. Something big.â
You tilt your head to look up at him, his expression so over-the-top that you canât help but giggle. âWhat is it, Sungie? Did you run out of snacks again?â
âNo,â he groans, throwing his free hand over his forehead like a tragic hero in a melodrama. âItâs worse. Much worse.â
You raise an eyebrow, biting back another laugh. âWorse than running out of snacks? Now Iâm worried.â
He shifts, propping himself up on one elbow and staring down at you with wide, comically serious eyes. âIâm not ready to be a dad again,â he declares, his voice filled with mock despair. âI barely survived the first time.â
It takes you a second to process his words, and then you burst into laughter. âWhat are you even talking about? Youâre an amazing dad to Seyeon!â
âThatâs not the point!â he retorts, wagging a finger at you like a professor giving a lecture. âSeyeonâs a literal angel. She eats her vegetables, brushes her teeth without a fight, and even says please and thank you. Do you know how rare that is?â
You nod, still laughing. âSo whatâs the problem?â
He flops back down onto the pillows, groaning dramatically. âThe problem is, Iâve been spoiled! What if the next kid is a little gremlin? What if they refuse to eat anything except chicken nuggets and demand a bedtime story and a TED Talk every night before bed?â
You cover your mouth to stifle your laughter as he continues, his arms flailing for emphasis. âAnd donât even get me started on the diapers. Do you have any idea how many diapers I changed with Seyeon? Enough to build a small fortress! I couldâve gone pro in diaper-changing.â
You snuggle closer, resting your chin on his chest as you grin up at him. âSo what Iâm hearing is... youâre scared of tiny humans.â
âTerrified,â he says, nodding solemnly. âTiny humans are unpredictable. One minute theyâre giggling at your funny faces, and the next, theyâre crying because you didnât let them eat crayons.â
âYouâre being dramatic,â you tease, poking his side. âBut for the record, I think youâd do just fine if we ever had another one. Youâre kind, patient, and you have a way of making even the most boring things fun.â
He blinks at you, his dramatic persona melting away for a moment as he smiles softly. âYou really think so?â
âI know so,â you say, pressing a kiss to his chest.
He sighs, his smile turning playful again. âOkay.â
âbut why did we started to talk about kids all of the sudden?â
âi.. cummed inside,â you laugh, pulling him into a hug.
As he wraps his arms around you, his voice softens. âDonât tease me! Itâs serious, I donât.. I donât think we can be pregnant yet. Seyeon barely know that we are together.â
âAgreed,â you murmur, resting your head against his chest again. His hand resumes its lazy circles on your back, and soon, the room is filled with nothing but the sound of your shared laughter and steady breathing. âAnd for the record, I take the pill.â
He sigh in relief, making you laugh louder.
Itâs a quiet Saturday morning, and the three of youâJisung, Seyeon, and youâare sitting in the living room. Seyeon is sprawled on the floor, surrounded by a sea of coloring books and crayons, her little tongue sticking out in concentration as she carefully colors a unicorn. Jisung is on the couch, his legs stretched out lazily, while you sit beside him, close enough that your knees occasionally bump.
âDaddy,â Seyeon says, not looking up from her masterpiece, âwhatâs your favorite color?â
Jisung leans forward, pretending to ponder the question deeply. âHmm, thatâs a tough one. I like... whatever color y/n likes.â
You look at him in surprise, your cheeks heating up. âWhat?â you ask, laughing nervously. âWhy?â
âBecause,â he says with a playful shrug, âitâs always a safe bet to like what y/n likes. She has excellent taste.â
Seyeon looks up at him, her crayon paused mid-stroke. âWhat if she likes rainbow? Thatâs all the colors, Daddy.â
âThen I like rainbow,â Jisung declares confidently, shooting you a wink.
A few minutes later, Seyeon holds up her finished unicorn drawing, beaming with pride. âLook, Daddy! Look, y/nie!â
âWow!â Jisung exclaims, clapping his hands dramatically. âThatâs amazing, sweetheart. y/n, donât you think Seyeonâs got the best artistic talent ever?â
You nod enthusiastically. âAbsolutely. Sheâs a little Picasso.â
Seyeon grins, clearly pleased with the praise. Then Jisung leans down toward her, his tone suddenly conspiratorial. âYou know,â he says, âY/n has been helping you so much lately. I think she deserves a big thank-you, donât you?â
Seyeon nods eagerly. âThank you, y/n!â
âAw, youâre welcome, sweetie,â you say, reaching over to ruffle her hair.
Jisung isnât done, though. âBut,â he adds, his voice taking on a teasing tone, âdonât you think y/n is super nice and pretty, too? Like, the best nanny ever?â
Seyeon blinks up at him, then looks at you, her face scrunching in thought. âYeah, y/n is really pretty. And she makes the best sandwiches. Daddy, do you like her?â
The room goes still for a moment, and you feel your face heat up. Jisung, however, takes it in stride, a sly smile spreading across his lips. âOf course I like her,â he says, leaning back casually. âSheâs amazing. Donât you think itâd be nice if she stayed with us forever?â
Seyeon tilts her head, her tiny brows furrowing. âLike... forever forever?â
Jisung nods, looking entirely too pleased with himself. âForever forever.â
You clear your throat, trying to suppress a laugh. âOkay, letâs not confuse her,â you say, shooting him a look.
Seyeon, ever the perceptive child, turns her gaze to you. âDo you want to stay forever, y/n?â
Caught off guard, you stammer, âWell, IâI mean, I really like being here with you and your daddy. Butââ
âShe does,â Jisung interrupts smoothly, cutting you off with a grin. âShe just doesnât know it yet.â
âDaddy,â Seyeon says matter-of-factly, âyouâre being weird.â
Jisung laughs, leaning down to kiss the top of her head. âMaybe. But Iâm also right.â
You shake your head, trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach as Seyeon goes back to her coloring. Jisung catches your eye, his grin softening into something more sincere. Itâs a moment that lingers just a little too long, and when you look away, you can still feel his gaze on you.
The morning slips into the soft, lazy hum of afternoon, with Seyeon bouncing between coloring, her favorite cartoons, and occasionally running to grab snacks from the kitchen. You and Jisung remain in the living room, comfortably settled on the couch, though his occasional remarks keep you on edgeâplayfully, of course.
As Seyeon gets engrossed in her show, Jisung leans toward you, his voice dropping low enough so only you can hear. âYou know,â he starts, his tone light and teasing, âI wasnât kidding earlier.â
You glance at him, narrowing your eyes. âAbout what?â
âAbout you staying forever.â His grin is playful, but thereâs an unmistakable warmth in his eyes that makes your breath hitch.
âJisung,â you whisper, glancing nervously at Seyeon, whoâs still focused on the TV. âYou canât just say stuff like that.â
âWhy not?â he asks, leaning his chin on his hand as if youâre having the most casual conversation in the world. âItâs true. I mean, Seyeon already loves you, you make the best sandwiches, andâletâs be honestâI think Iâd be a little lost without you around.â
You try to play it off, rolling your eyes even as your cheeks heat up. âYouâre being dramatic again.â
âIâm not!â he protests, his voice a little louder now. Seyeon turns briefly to look at him, and he quickly softens his tone. âIâm just saying... this house feels a lot warmer when youâre in it.â
You bite your lip, unsure how to respond. Before you can think of something, Seyeon pipes up from her spot on the floor, completely oblivious to the tension in the room.
âDaddy, can we have pancakes tomorrow?â she asks, twisting around to look at him.
âOf course, sweetie,â Jisung says with a bright smile. Then, without missing a beat, he adds, âMaybe y/n will help me make them. Or, you know, we could have y/n  make all the pancakes forever.â
âForever pancakes!â Seyeon cheers, throwing her hands in the air. She doesnât fully understand what heâs implying, but she giggles anyway, clearly enjoying the idea.
Before you can respond, she climbs onto the couch, wedging herself between the two of you with all the confidence of a child who knows sheâs the center of your world. She looks up at Jisung with big, curious eyes.
âDaddy, do you love y/n?â
The question hangs in the air, and you feel like your heart has stopped. Jisung, however, doesnât miss a beat. He glances at you, a playful twinkle in his eye, before turning to his daughter.
âOf course I love y/n,â he says, his tone warm and sincere. âSheâs very special to us, donât you think?â
Seyeon nods seriously. âYeah, sheâs the best.â
Your heart melts at the sight of her little face lit up with pure affection. Jisung, ever the opportunist, takes the moment to slide an arm around both you and Seyeon, pulling you closer.
âSee?â he murmurs, his voice dropping just for you. âI think itâs unanimous. Youâre stuck with us.â
Seyeon claps her hands. âY/n forever!â she declares, leaning against you with a contented sigh. Jisung winks at you over her head, and you canât help but laugh. Maybe staying forever isnât such a bad idea after all.
Youâre folding laundry on a quiet Sunday afternoon when Jisung walks into the room, Seyeon bouncing happily on his hip. His face lights up when he sees you, and you smile back instinctively. Moments like theseâthe easy rhythm of life in their homeâalways warm your heart, even as they sometimes leave you wondering if you truly belong here in the way Jisungâs lingering glances suggest.
âHey, y/n,â Jisung says casually, though thereâs a certain energy to his tone that immediately puts you on alert. âI was thinking...â
âThatâs always dangerous,â you tease, setting down the shirt you were folding.
He grins, undeterred. âHa ha, very funny. No, seriously. Weâre heading out of town for the holidays, just a little cabin getaway. Me, Seyeon... her mom.â He pauses, gauging your reaction. âAnd I thought itâd be really nice if you came with us.â
You freeze mid-fold, your mind racing. Did he justâ?
Seyeon perks up at the mention of you. âY/nâs coming? Yay! Youâll build snowmen with me, right?â
Your heart clenches at her excitement, but your nerves are quick to set in. âOh, um... I donât know,â you say hesitantly, glancing at Jisung. âI wouldnât want to intrude or anything.â
âIntrude?â Jisung repeats, laughing softly. âY/n, youâre family. Youâre basically Seyeonâs favorite person in the worldâafter me, of course,â he adds with a wink.
âAnd Mommy,â Seyeon chimes in cheerfully, her little voice oblivious to the awkward undercurrent her words create.
You force a smile, your anxiety bubbling beneath the surface. The idea of spending the holidays with Jisung, Seyeon, and her mother feels... complicated. What if itâs awkward? What if her mom doesnât like the idea of you being there? What if you misread all of Jisungâs hints and youâre overstepping your place in their lives?
âI donât know, Jisung,â you say softly, busying yourself with folding another shirt. âIt sounds like a family thing. I donât want to get in the way.â
He sets Seyeon down, and she scampers off to find her crayons. As soon as sheâs out of earshot, Jisung steps closer, his expression softening. âY/n, listen. I know it might feel... weird. But itâs not like that, I promise. Seyeon adores you, and I want you there becauseâwell, because I want you there. You make everything better, even the holidays.â
His sincerity catches you off guard, and you look up at him, your cheeks warming. âAre you sure her mom will be okay with it? I donât want to cause any tension.â
Jisung waves off your concern with a casual shrug. âSheâs fine with it. Weâve talked about it already. Things between us are purely about co-parenting now, nothing else. She knows how important you are to Seyeonâand to me.â
Your heart skips a beat at the way he says those last words, but you still hesitate. âItâs just... a lot. I donât want to make anyone uncomfortable.â
Jisung steps closer, his hand brushing yours. âY/N,â he says softly, his gaze locking with yours. âYouâre not just Seyeonâs nanny. Youâre part of this family, whether you realize it or not. The holidays wouldnât feel right without you there.â
His words settle over you like a warm blanket, melting away some of your anxiety. You glance toward the living room, where Seyeon is happily humming to herself as she colors. Sheâs so excited about the idea of you coming, and Jisungâs earnestness is hard to resist.
âOkay,â you say finally, your voice barely above a whisper. âIâll come.â
Jisungâs face lights up with a smile that makes your heart flutter. âThatâs my girl,â he says, squeezing your hand briefly before pulling away.
As you watch him walk back to Seyeon, your nerves remain, but theyâre tempered by something elseâsomething warmer. Maybe this holiday wonât be as daunting as you think. Maybe, just maybe, itâll be exactly what you need to feel like you truly belong.
Oh, if only you knew how bad the things were turning to.
The cabin was quiet except for the faint crackle of the fireplace. Seyeon had just fallen asleep after an evening of snow angels and hot chocolate, and you were in your room, giving Jisung and his ex some space to talk. They hadnât had a real conversation in a long time, and tonight seemed like the right timeâat least thatâs what Jisung had said.
But now, standing in the dimly lit living room, he wasnât so sure.
âSo,â she started, her arms crossed defensively as she leaned against the mantle. âWhatâs this really about, Jisung? Youâre acting like everythingâs fine, like we can play happy families for Seyeonâs sake, but we both know itâs not that simple.â
Jisung sighed, running a hand through his hair. âItâs not about playing happy families. Itâs about doing whatâs best for her. She deserves stability, and I thought we were finally in a place where we could at least pretend to get along.â
âPretend,â she repeated bitterly, a harsh laugh escaping her lips. âRight. Because pretending fixes everything. Like it fixed us?â
âThis isnât about us,â Jisung snapped, his voice sharper than he intended. He softened his tone, taking a step closer. âItâs about Seyeon. Sheâs happy. She feels safe. Isnât that what matters?â
Her eyes narrowed, and she straightened up, her posture rigid. âDonât act like youâre the only one thinking about her, Jisung. Iâve been doing this alone for years while you were too busy chasing your career. Youâre lucky she even knows you.â
The words hit him like a punch to the gut, and his jaw clenched. âThatâs not fair,â he said quietly, his voice laced with hurt. âIâve done everything I can to be here for her. I love her.â
âAnd yet you werenât there when she needed you the most,â she shot back, her voice cracking. âWhen she had her first fever, when she started school, when she cried herself to sleep asking why Daddy wasnât home.â
Jisung flinched, his shoulders sagging under the weight of her words. âI know I made mistakes. I wasnât there as much as I should have been, and Iâll regret that forever. But Iâm here now. Doesnât that count for something?â
She shook her head, tears glistening in her eyes. âYou think you can just walk back in and fix everything with your charm and your promises, but life doesnât work that way. You canât undo the past, Jisung. And you canât expect me to forget it, either.â
âIâm not asking you to forget,â he said, his voice trembling with frustration. âIâm asking you to see that Iâm trying. For her. For all of us.â
âAll of us?â she scoffed, bitterness dripping from her words. âLetâs not pretend this is about âus.â Youâve already moved on, havenât you? Bringing her here, parading her around like sheâs some kind of replacement.â
âY/n isnât a replacement,â Jisung said firmly, his eyes blazing. âSheâs a part of Seyeonâs life, and sheâs been nothing but good for her.â
âMaybe,â she admitted, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. âBut you donât get to rewrite history, Jisung. You donât get to act like the perfect father now and expect me to just go along with it.â
The silence that followed was heavy, suffocating. Jisung looked at her, his expression a mix of anger and heartbreak.
âIâm not trying to rewrite history,â he said finally, his voice quiet but steady. âIâm just trying to be better. For Seyeon. If you canât see that... then I donât know what else to say.â
She turned away, her back to him as she stared into the flickering flames. âMaybe thereâs nothing left to say,â she murmured, her voice barely audible.
Jisung stood there for a moment, his fists clenched at his sides, before he turned and walked away, the weight of her words pressing down on him like a storm cloud.
The air between them was thick with unresolved tension, and as he disappeared down the hallway, she didnât call after him.
In the quiet of the cabin, the distance between them felt more insurmountable than ever.
The first couple of days passed in relative peace, but by the third morning, it was clear something was off.
It started small: Seyeonâs mother, would âaccidentallyâ leave you out of conversations, her voice dropping to a whisper with Jisung whenever you walked into the room. She rearranged the kitchen supplies youâd neatly organized to prepare breakfast, then acted oblivious when you couldnât find anything. Once, she even laughed and said, âOh, you must not spend much time in kitchens,â with a pointed glance at Jisung.
You brushed it off at first. This was her time with Seyeon, too, and you didnât want to stir up unnecessary drama. But her passive-aggressive behavior only escalated.
When you offered to take Seyeon sledding, she suddenly announced that theyâd already planned to go without you. You stayed behind, feeling awkward and unsure of your place. When they returned, her mother made a point of loudly recounting how much fun theyâd had, conveniently forgetting to include Jisungâs praise about how Seyeon wouldnât stop asking for you while they were out.
At dinner one evening, she served everyone but you. When you politely got up to grab your own plate, she laughed. âOh, sorry! I didnât realize you were joining us for every meal.â
You bit your tongue, plastering on a smile. âI didnât mean to impose.â
Jisung, oblivious, simply passed you the serving spoon with a wink. âY/nâs practically family,â he said, not noticing the way her jaw tightened.
That night, as you tucked Seyeon into bed, she wrapped her little arms around your neck and whispered, âMommy says youâre just visiting. But I want you to stay forever.â
Her words made your heart ache, but you only smiled, brushing her hair back gently. âIâll always be here for you, sweetie.â
The next morning, the mother pulled out all the stops. She insisted on decorating Christmas cookies with Seyeon, making a big show of asking Jisung for help. âItâs our little family tradition,â she said sweetly, her eyes flicking to you as she emphasized the word family.
You excused yourself, claiming you needed to catch up on reading. But as you sat on the couch with an open book in your lap, you couldnât concentrate. You could hear their laughter from the kitchen, and every time her voice rang out, you felt smaller and smaller.
Jisung seemed none the wiser, though you couldnât blame him. she moves were subtle, designed to push you out of the picture without outright confrontation. And you didnât want to ruin the holidays for him or Seyeon by bringing it up.
But by the time Christmas Eve rolled around, your patience was wearing thin. You were helping Jisung set the table for dinner when she walked in, holding a tray of desserts sheâd made with Seyeon.
âOh, Jisung,â she said in a syrupy tone, âremember the first Christmas we spent together? You couldnât stop eating my cookies.â
Jisung chuckled, not catching the tension in the room. âYeah, you always did make great cookies.â
She smirked, turning to you. âDid you try baking with Seyeon yet? Itâs a bit of a skill, you know.â
You opened your mouth to reply, but Jisung beat you to it. âY/nâs amazing with Seyeon,â he said, smiling warmly. âShe doesnât need to bake to prove that.â
For the first time, his ex faltered, her expression slipping before she covered it with a tight smile. âOf course,â she said, turning back to the tray.
But as the evening wore on, her petty jabs continued, each one chipping away at your resolve. You kept your head high, smiling and nodding through it all, but when the night ended and you finally retreated to your room, you felt exhausted.
You sat on the edge of the bed, your hands trembling with the weight of it all. You wanted to tell Jisungâdesperatelyâbut the thought of burdening him during the holidays, or worse, causing tension between him and her, kept you silent.
Christmas morning dawned bright and snowy, the cabin blanketed in a pristine layer of white. You could hear Seyeonâs excited voice echoing through the halls as she begged Jisung to wake up and open presents. Her enthusiasm was infectious, and despite the tension brewing under the surface, you pulled yourself out of bed and resolved to make the day as joyful as possible for her.
By the time you made it to the living room, the mother was already there, sitting cross-legged by the tree and sipping her coffee. Her gaze flicked to you briefly before she turned her attention back to Seyeon, who was bouncing on Jisungâs lap.
âGood morning,â you said softly, offering a polite smile.
The older girl raised her mug in response but didnât say anything. Jisung, oblivious to the exchange, grinned at you. âMorning, sleepyhead. Coffeeâs in the kitchen.â
You nodded and slipped into the kitchen to pour yourself a cup. When you returned, Seyeon was already tearing into the first of her presents, her delighted squeals filling the room. You took a seat on the couch, watching her with a warm smile as Jisung handed her another brightly wrapped package.
âThis oneâs from y/n,â he said, holding the gift out to her.
Seyeonâs eyes lit up, and she practically lunged for it. âFrom y/n?â she asked, tearing into the wrapping paper. âYay!â
As she pulled out the set of art supplies youâd chosen for her, her face lit up with pure joy. âThank you, y/n!â she cried, running over to throw her arms around you.
You hugged her tightly, your heart swelling. âYouâre welcome, sweetheart. I hope you make lots of beautiful pictures with them.â
âOf course I will!â she said, running back to show Jisung and her mother her new treasures.
Jisungâs ex smile was tight, but she said nothing, instead turning her attention to the next present.
As the morning went on, the tension simmered just beneath the surface. Her comments were subtle but pointed, from joking about Jisungâs taste in gifts to making unnecessary remarks about your relationship with Seyeon.
When you offered to help clean up the wrapping paper, she waved you off with an overly sweet smile. âOh, donât worry about it, y/n. Iâm sure youâre used to tidying up after Seyeon, but this is a family tradition.â
You swallowed the retort rising in your throat and busied yourself picking up stray ribbons instead. Jisung was too preoccupied with helping Seyeon assemble a toy to notice the slight, and you decided not to draw attention to it.
Later, during lunch, his ex decided to needle further.
âSo, y/n,â she began, her tone light but her eyes sharp. âWhat are your plans for the new year? I imagine youâll be looking for other opportunities soon, right?â
Jisung frowned, looking up from his plate. âWhat do you mean?â
âOh, nothing,â she said with a shrug, taking a sip of her wine. âItâs just that being a nanny isnât exactly a long-term career, is it? How long is that girl working for you now? 9, 10 months?â
You felt your cheeks flush, and you opened your mouth to respond, but Jisung beat you to it.
âY/nâs not just Seyeonâs nanny,â he said firmly, his tone laced with irritation. âSheâs part of this family. And sheâs not going anywhere.â
She raised an eyebrow, her lips curving into a faint smile. âOf course not,â she said smoothly, though her eyes betrayed her displeasure.
You busied yourself with your food, your appetite gone. Jisungâs words were kind, but they only seemed to add fuel to Miraeâs passive-aggressive fire.
By the time the day wound down, you were emotionally drained. Seyeon had fallen asleep on the couch, clutching one of her new toys, and Jisung had carried her off to bed. Mirae was sitting by the fire, scrolling through her phone, when you finally decided to head to your room.
As you passed her, she spoke without looking up. âYou know,â she said, her tone casual, âJisungâs always been good at seeing the best in people. But that doesnât mean everyone belongs in his life forever.â
You stopped, your breath catching in your throat. For a moment, you considered responding, but you quickly decided against it. Instead, you turned and walked away, her words echoing in your mind.
Lying in bed that night, you stared at the ceiling, your heart heavy. No matter how much Jisung reassured you, her actions had a way of making you feel like an outsider. And while you didnât want to let her win, you couldnât shake the feeling that maybe she was rightâmaybe you didnât belong here after all.
The days after Christmas continued to weigh heavily on you. You kept your distance from her, as much for your own sanity as to avoid any further confrontations. But the further away you emotionally distanced yourself from her, the more distant you became from Jisung too.
You saw the way he looked at you, the concerned glances he gave when you withdrew into yourself during meals or stayed behind while he and Seyeon went outside to play in the snow. He was starting to notice the quietness, the way you didnât laugh as easily anymore, how you seemed to put distance between yourself and everything they shared.
âHey,â Jisung said softly one evening, after Seyeon had gone to bed. You were sitting by the window, watching the snow fall in silence. He sat down beside you, his hand gently brushing yours. âWhatâs going on with you?â
You looked away, your fingers tightening around the edge of your sweater. âNothing. Iâm fine.â
He frowned, his brows knitting together in concern. âbaby, come on. Youâve been like this all week. I know somethingâs bothering you.â
You let out a breath, your gaze fixed on the snow falling in the distance. âItâs just... Seyeonâs mother.â
Jisung sighed, leaning back in his chair. âI shouldâve known. I told you, Iâll handle her. You donât have to deal with her alone.â
You shook your head, your voice barely above a whisper. âItâs not just her. Sheâs been trying to make me feel like an outsider. And itâs working.â
Jisungâs expression softened, his frustration bubbling beneath the surface. âShe doesnât get to dictate how we feel, love. Youâre important to us. To Seyeon and me.â
âI know that,â you said quietly, your voice trembling. âBut it doesnât feel that way when she keeps pushing me away.â
âI see it too,â he admitted, his hand squeezing yours gently. âSheâs been petty, and itâs not right. But you canât let her win by pulling away from me too.â
You glanced at him, your heart aching at the vulnerability in his voice. âI donât want to hurt you,â you said softly, your voice breaking. âBut I canât keep pretending it doesnât bother me.â
He let out a breath, leaning his forehead against yours. âYouâre not pretending. I can see it. And it hurts me too.â
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, and you blinked rapidly, trying to hold them back. âI donât know what to do,â you whispered, your voice barely a breath.
âWeâll figure it out together,â Jisung said firmly. âBut you canât shut me out. Not when Iâm trying to make things better for you.â
âIâm scared,â you admitted, the weight of everything pressing down on your chest. âThat no matter how much you try, it wonât ever be enough.â
Jisung cupped your face in his hands, tilting your chin up so your eyes met his. âThen let me try harder. Please angel.â
The sincerity in his voice broke something inside you, and you finally let the tears fall, your body trembling against his embrace. âI want to trust you,â you said, your voice a whisper. âBut she makes it so hard.â
He held you tighter, his warmth enveloping you in a cocoon of love and comfort. âWeâll get through this,â he whispered against your hair. âI promise.â
The next morning, the cabin was quiet. Seyeon and her mother had gone for an early walk through the snowy woods, leaving the house blissfully empty. Jisung had spent the night thinking about how to make things right, how to remind you that he caredâtruly caredâand that nothing his ex said could take that away.
When he found you sitting by the window, staring out into the snowy landscape with a distant look in your eyes, he knew it was time.
âHey,â he said softly, gently nudging your shoulder. âWhat do you say we spend the day together? Just us.â
You glanced at him, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at your lips. âJust us?â
âJust us,â he confirmed, his eyes sincere. âSeyeon and her mom are out all day. Itâll just be you and me.â
You hesitated for a moment, the quiet tension in the air between you making it hard to let go of your worries. But then his hand reached for yours, steady and warm, and you felt your resolve soften.
âIâd like that,â you said softly.
The day was crisp and clear, the snow untouched, and the silence between you and Jisung was comfortable. You walked hand in hand through the frosted woods, your breath forming tiny clouds in the cold air.
âYou donât have to worry about her you know,â Jisung said quietly, breaking the silence. âNot today. Today is just about us.â
You nodded, letting his words settle into your heart. âItâs hard, though. Hard not to think about everything.â
âI know,â he murmured, pulling you a little closer. âBut we donât have to carry that weight right now. Letâs just be us.â
You both kept walking, the crunch of snow beneath your boots the only sound between you. The crisp air stung your cheeks, but Jisungâs warmth radiating from his coat and his hand in yours made you feel grounded.
After a while, he stopped walking, tugging you gently to a nearby bench tucked between the trees. You sat down together, the snow falling softly around you.
âThis is nice,â you said, leaning into him slightly.
âYeah,â he agreed, brushing a snowflake from your hair. âItâs perfect.â
For a while, you just sat in comfortable silence, the world around you feeling far away. Eventually, Jisung broke the quiet with a soft, playful nudge.
âSo, what do you want to do next?â he asked with a smile, his voice teasing. âSnowball fight? Sledding?â
You laughed, shaking your head. âYouâre not going to win a snowball fight, Jisung.â
âOh, you donât know that,â he said with mock confidence. âI was a champion in school.â
You rolled your eyes, playfully shoving his shoulder. âYouâre delusional.â
He laughed, his entire face lighting up. âOkay, fine. Weâll skip the snowball fight. But you owe me something fun.â
You looked up at him, your heart swelling at how easy it felt to be with him, to simply enjoy each otherâs company. âYouâre lucky youâre cute.â
âAnd youâre lucky youâre stuck with me,â he teased, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to your temple.
Jisung held you close, his arm draped comfortably around you, and you let yourself sink into the warmth of his embrace, knowing that even if the world around you wasnât perfect, thisâ himâwas.
He drags you in the deep woods, making you giggle with a confused expression, âWhat are we doing now?â
Jisungâs smirk grows bigger when he grabs your waist gently, pushing you gently against a tree, his lips meeting yours. The sudden touch of his cold hands for the snow makes your skin tingle under his touch, âu-um..â
You donât realise how much you missed your boyfriendâs attention until you are under him, in bed in the empty cabin in his room, with his head between your thighs.Â
He sucks hard on your nub, feeling your writhe beneath him.
Jisung moans into your pussy as you pulls him closer, your taste filling his senses. He licks and sucks at your folds, his tongue delving deep inside your tight heat. His hands grip your thighs, keeping you spread open for his mouth.
His tongue flicks against your swollen bud, his fingers slipping inside you to curl up and stroke that spot that drives you wild.  âMmm, you taste amazing baby...â
Jisung's skilled tongue explores every inch of your glistening folds, lapping at your sweet nectar like a man starved. He focuses on your sensitive bud, flicking and circling it rapidly before sucking it between his lips.
âi-iâm so close...â You gasp as you cover your mouth with your hand, your eyes roll back in pleasure.
Feeling your walls starting to flutter around his fingers, Jisung doubles his efforts. He seals his lips around your clit and sucks hard, his tongue vibrating against the sensitive nub as he pumps two fingers deep inside your, curling them to hit that perfect spot.
It doesnât take you long after to cum, his tongue happy to clean you, his eyes meeting yours after thatâit was the best head someone gave to you. He stands up between your thighs, looking down to your happy and now relaxed figure, âthatâs my girl, all happy and smily.â
A few months had passed since that quiet trip, and life had settled back into its routine. Seyeon had grown closer to you, her attachment deepening as you spent more time with her, nurturing her and becoming a significant part of her life. The bond between the three of you felt natural, but you knew it wasnât sustainable to keep your relationship with Jisung a secret from her forever.
One evening, after tucking Seyeon into bed, you found Jisung sitting by the fire with a tired smile on his face. The room was dimly lit, casting a warm glow over him. You approached slowly, sitting down beside him with a soft sigh.
âI think itâs time,â you said softly, breaking the silence.
Jisungâs brow furrowed slightly, his eyes meeting yours with a question. âTime for what?â
âFor Seyeon to know about us,â you continued quietly. âAbout us as more than just... you know, me being her nanny.â
He inhaled deeply, considering your words. âYou think sheâs ready?â
You nodded, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. âI do. She talks about you all the time. She knows youâre important to me, but I think itâs time she understands what that means. Fully.â
Jisung reached for your hand, threading his fingers gently with yours. âYouâve given this a lot of thought.â
âI have.â You squeezed his hand lightly. âItâs not just about us. Itâs about Seyeon feeling secure and knowing that you love her, and that we love her together.â
He smiled softly, leaning in just slightly. âYouâre right. She deserves to know. And I donât want her to feel confused about what we mean to each other.â
âExactly,â you agreed, squeezing his hand again. âWeâve built something special with her, and I donât want to hide it anymore.â
Jisung leaned back into his chair, his gaze thoughtful as he considered your words. âIt might be a bit overwhelming at first,â he admitted. âBut I trust you. Weâll figure it out together.â
You smiled softly, your heart lighter than it had been in weeks. âI just want her to know that itâs okay to love both of us.â
He gave you a tender look, his thumb brushing across the back of your hand. âSheâll understand. Youâve been there for her in a way that goes beyond what anyone else could. And I couldnât have asked for a better person to be by her side.â
The warmth of his words settled into your heart, and for the first time in a long while, you felt peace.
âWeâll tell her soon,â you said quietly, feeling a new sense of certainty. âMaybe even tomorrow.â
Jisung nodded, a soft smile playing at his lips. âTomorrow it is.â
The next day, after breakfast, you and Jisung sat down with Seyeon in the living room. She was playing with her dolls on the carpet, her little giggles filling the space. You and Jisung exchanged a glance, both of you ready for the conversation that was about to change things.
âSeyeon,â Jisung began softly, settling beside her on the floor, âthereâs something important we want to talk to you about.â
Seyeon paused, looking up at both of you with wide, curious eyes. âWhat is it, Daddy?â
You sat down next to Jisung, a gentle smile on your face. âWell, Seyeon, you know y/n, right?â
She nodded eagerly, her small hands clutching a doll close to her chest. âYeah! y/n takes care of me and plays with me. I love her.â
Jisung smiled warmly. âWe love you too, sweetheart. But thereâs something else you should know. Y/n isnât just here to take care of you. Sheâs a very important person in our lives. Sheâs someone we care about a lot, someone who loves us just like we love her.â
Seyeon blinked up at him, her little brows furrowing. âSo⊠y/n is more than just my friend?â
You nodded. âThatâs right. Jisung and I, weâre all like a family. And we want you to know that itâs okay to love all of us, even if itâs a little different from what youâre used to.â
The room grew quiet for a moment as Seyeon absorbed what you were saying. She stared at you both, her expression thoughtful, before breaking into a small smile. âI already love both of you. So, thatâs okay, right?â
Jisung and you exchanged relieved glances, sharing a quiet laugh. âYes, sweetheart,â Jisung said softly. âThatâs more than okay.â
Seyeon clapped her hands together, her eyes sparkling. âThen I donât have to worry! Iâm happy. I like having both of you.â
You and Jisung embraced her in a hug, the three of you tangled together in the warmth of love. âWeâre happy too, Seyeon,â you whispered, your voice full of emotion.
Later that evening, Jisung held you close on the couch, Seyeon nestled between you both as a Disney movie played quietly in the background. She giggled at a funny scene, her little fingers clutching the popcorn bowl, as Jisungâs arm tightened around your shoulders.
âI thought she might not understand,â you admitted softly, feeling Jisungâs warmth seep into your bones.
âSheâs smart,â Jisung replied, brushing a strand of hair from your face. âAnd you made it easy for her. She loves you more than you know.â
You smiled, leaning your head on his shoulder. âShe loves both of us.â
âAnd thatâs perfect,â he said, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple.
For the first time, the weight of uncertainty seemed to lift. Together, you and Jisung had built a familyâone that was unique, imperfect, but full of love and understanding. And that was all that mattered.
The sun set gently over the quiet cabin, painting the sky in soft hues of pink and orange. The sound of a crackling fire filled the room, its warmth spreading through the space as you sat together with Jisung and Seyeon. She sat between you both, her small hands clasped tightly as she listened to a bedtime story Jisung was reading.
âAnd then, the prince and princess lived happily ever after,â Jisung finished, his voice smooth and comforting. He closed the book gently and kissed Seyeonâs forehead.
âGoodnight, Daddy,â Seyeon whispered sleepily, her eyelids fluttering closed.
âGoodnight, sweetheart,â Jisung murmured, tucking a blanket around her.
You watched quietly, a soft smile on your face as you ran your fingers through Seyeonâs hair. She was fast asleep in no time, her little breaths steady and peaceful. Jisung carefully carried her to her bed, placing her down gently and pulling the covers up to her chin.
Once she was tucked in, he returned to you, sitting beside you on the couch with a sigh of contentment. You leaned into him, your head resting against his shoulder as the fire continued to burn warmly in the hearth.
âI think she finally understands,â Jisung said softly, his voice low and affectionate.
You nodded, smiling up at him. âYeah, she does. She loves us both so easily.â
âSheâs lucky,â he said quietly, his arm wrapping around you. âHaving two people who care about her like this. Youâve been amazing with her, baby.â
You gave him a small laugh. âWell, she makes it easy. How could I not love her?â
âSheâs lucky,â he repeated, pulling you closer. âBut so am I.â
The room settled into a peaceful stillness. Outside, the snow continued to fall gently, blanketing the world in white. Inside, it was warm and cozy, the only sounds being the crackling fire and the soft hum of your shared presence.
You and Jisung sat in comfortable silence, lost in the little moments of your own little family. This, right hereâthis calm, this loveâwas enough.
No matter what came next, you knew you had each other. And that was everything.
@chancloud8 @hanji-coffee .
#han jisung#Han Jisung dilf#Han Jisung skz#Han Jisung x reader#han jisung fluff#han jisung smut#Han Jisung x you#Han Jisung x y/n#skz#( skz. â đ! )#stray kids#han#stray kids diff#stray kids smut#skz smut#smut#stray kids x reader#slow burn#Han Jisung slow burn#hanji#stray kids han#han smut
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WIP DUMP
okay so this is lowkey inspired by @jayparked posting about her wips a bit ago (check them out here she's crazy talented and i can't wait to read them all) and since i've been struggling with writing recently i thought maybe sharing some of my wips could help. also biggest thanks to snail for helping me with the synopses for some of these and listening to me stress over the banners and everything
if you want to talk to me about any of them or wanna get tagged pls don't hesitate to send asks or comment on this post, i'd love to talk about them some moređ„șâ€ïž
MIDNIGHT IN MILAN â lhs
⥠â featuring. heeseung x fem!reader
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, established relationship, idol AU (both heeseung and yn)
⥠â warnings. semi-public sex, unprotected sex, mirror sex, mild choking, creampie, fingering, tiniest hint of degradation (he calls her a slut like once), one singular spank, some hair pulling, not really any aftercare
⥠â estimated word count. 6k
they say love makes you do stupid things...surely fucking your boyfriend in the bathroom at the prada after party when your relationship isn't even public and neither of you can afford a dating scandal isn't that stupid, right?
(i'm well aware the hype around tipsy heeseung has already died down but i started writing this immediately after the pics dropped and then got hit by writers block so i'm dedicated to finish this)
!! more under the cut !!
HE HATES ME, HE HATES ME NOT â psh
⥠â featuring. sunghoon x fem!reader
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, enemies to lovers, coworker AU, miscommunication (ikik), lowkey past fuckboi sunghoon
⥠â warnings. hate sex, semi-public sex (in an archive room?), protected and unprotected sex (there's several smut scenes), choking, spanking, degradation, praise kink, oral (m. and f. receiving), handjob, fingering, manhandling, overstimulation, dacryphilia, spit kink
⥠â estimated word count. 20k
park sunghoon hates you, and you hate him. it hadn't always been like that, when you first joined the company he works at he was friendly, a real gentleman, but over time of working together he turns cold, sometimes even downright mean, and you cannot for the life of you figure out what caused the sudden change in his behavior. however, things between you change yet again when you 'accidentally' get locked in your offices archive room.
HOME IS WHEREVER YOU ARE â lhs
⥠â featuring. heeseung x fem!reader
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, college!au, friends to lovers
⥠â warnings. there's some talks of depression as well as unhealthy coping mechanism so be aware of that pls, protected sex (be proud of me okay), oral (f. and m. receiving), vanilla af, neither of them are virgins or inexperienced but they just having sex for the first time together after realizing they've been in love with each other for years :')
⥠â estimated word count. 14k
"distance makes the heart grow fonder." is no longer just a cliche saying. heeseung decided to follow his dreams, but doing so lead him to a different city, leaving you behind. no other friends, no hobbies to keep yourself busy, and no motivation to keep going, the only thing keeping you on some sort of routine is attending your college classes that your parents force you to go to. just when you're about to officially quit and give up, heeseung shows up out of nowhere and manages to pull you out of your slump, upturning your whole friendship in the process.
NATURAL REMEDY â pjs
⥠â featuring. jay x fem!reader
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, physical therapist!reader, patient!jay, probably hipaa violations idk just don't do this irl basically
⥠â warnings. unprotected sex, oral (m. receiving), body worship (jay receiving bc he deserves someone to tell him or handsome he is), handjob, lots of oil, lowkey massage kink idek what to call this??
⥠â estimated word count. 5k
when jay hurts his knee while goofing around with his friends, his doctor recommends rest and physical therapy. lucky for him, your office is just around the corner, just that neither of you can make good on the ordered rest by doctor.
HEALTHY COMPETITION â lhs + sjy
⥠â featuring. heeseung x fem!reader x jake
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, college au, non-idol au, and they were roommates (oh my god they were roommates), no romance just fucking
⥠â warnings. basically no plot, threesome (duh), protected and unprotected sex, anal, double penetration, spanking, oral (m. and f. receiving), multiple rounds, manhandling, they make it a competition to see who can make her moan the loudest...
⥠â estimated word count. 9k
your roommates bickering should be nothing but white noise to you at this point, but when they both rope you into their little argument of who fucks better things take an interesting turn and a welcomed distraction from studying is provided.
SNEAKY LINK â sjy
⥠â featuring. jake x fem!reader
⥠â genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, uni AU, frat boy jake (i'm sorry), friends with benefits but no one knows, alcohol consumption (they're not drunk and both consenting !!)
⥠â warnings. unprotected sex (it's a theme for me atp, don't do this irl pls), dry humping, fingering (it's jake come on now), kinda rushed sex ig, does it count as exhibitionism when they fuck in a spare bedroom idk, oral (f. receiving), breast play
⥠â estimated word count. 4k
frat parties usually weren't your thing, but when your best friend invites you (with the intention to be her wingwoman) you're not one to let her down. that is until you run into jake, whom you've been fooling around with without anyone knowing ...
© sungbeams â all rights reserved. i do not give permission to copy, repost, modify or translate my works.
#lia.txt#wips#wip dump#pls interact guys :(#gonna put some enha tags for exposure sorry in advance !!#heeseung x reader#sunghoon x reader#enhypen smut#enhypen x reader#heeseung smut#sunghoon smut#jake sim x reader#jake sim smut#jay park x reader#jay park smut
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MATT WAS PISSED OFF SO HE RIPPED OFF YOUR CLOTHES.
[smut, dom!matt, sub!reader, mdni]
the sound of the fabric of your revealing lace crop top being torn apart filled the kitchen, along with your deep breathing as you watched your boyfriend get rid of your clothing. he throws it somewhere aside, his eyes flickering hungrily over your bare chest, his cock throbbing painfully against his jeans. you could feel him brushing against your bare thigh as he stood between your legs.
"mattâ" your weak, quiet voice fills the kitchen, but he just shushes you, hands traveling over your body, fingers brushing against your hard nipples, stealing a whimper from you.
he urges you to lean back on the table so you do, propping yourself up on your elbows so you can still see him, as his hands travel down your body to the waistband of your shorts. the fabric quickly joins your torn top somewhere in the kitchen, matt spreads your legs, seeing the visible wet dark stain on your lacy red panties.
"look how desperate you are for me..." a low chuckle echoes in the room, his fingers teasingly moving up your inner thighs, then finding your clit and start rubbing it, the material of your underwear giving you even more friction.
"matt-- please..." you pathetically whine, legs trying to close automatically, but he keeps you spread.
"please, what?" his blue eyes finding yours, tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth, "why should i give you what you want, when you've been teasing me all fuckin' day with that thin sexy top of yours?"
you knew your boyfriend really well and you were taking advantage of it really often. you knew what to say, what to do or what to wear to turn him on. the excitement you felt while waiting for matt to finally snap and put you in your place was strong everytime, but this time it's sure you did too much.
matt has a lot of weaknesses when it comes to you and one of them was seeing you in lace clothes. it didn't matter if they were tights, a dress or panties. he loved it.
so when he saw you wearing nothing more than a lace see-through top that you obviously weren't wearing a bra under, your nipples hard against the material and begging for his touch, your shorts with your lace thong peeking out of them, he lost his mind. it was the sluttiest outfit and you were carrying yourself so innocently around the house, constantly brushing your hand against his thigh or bending over while 'accidentally' dropping something. matt couldn't wait for chris and nick to leave, so he could have his way with you.
and it finally happened.
while looking you in the eyes, he rips off your panties with such a strength that your whole body shakes. matt groans at the sight of your dripping pussy, throwing aside the broken underwear.
"you wanted to make me lose it? walkin' like that in front of my brothers, knowing i can't do shit 'bout that? how rude, baby..."
"n-no, i didn't... mean to--"
"oh, you did," he cuts you off, unbuckling his belt and sliding his pants down, followed by his boxers. "but is fine, we'll take care of that... you'll learn how to behaveâ" spreading your legs wider, he strokes himself a few times before slamming into you without a warning, both of you moaning at the sensation of your tight heat squeezing him in.
matt was usually such a sweetheart, always going all lovely and sweet with you, knowing both of you just love the intimacy, but whenever you made him mad, it was like something switched in him. like, for example, now.
he doesn't even give you any time to adjust as he pulls out almost all the way, before going right back in, making sure you can feel him deep. "so sensitive, hm?" he mutters, his hands roaming over your body possessively before grabbing your hips to keep you still. his cock slamming in and out of you with brutal force, making you see stars and constantly moan his name. the sound of wet flesh meeting flesh filling the kitchen, along with your cries and his pants.
"always takin' me so wellâ fuckkkk, baby... such a good girl--" he grunts with each movement, his voice hoarse from the exertion.
"m-mattâ feels so... good..." you fall back flat onto the table, the feeling of cold wood met with your heated skin makes you shiver. you cry out, "more--"
"more?" shitttt, mmhmm... my greedy girl, huh?" he grinds into you harder, hitting that sweet spot inside you that makes your vision go blurry. "a'ight, let's see how long you can last like this..."
"oh-- oh my... pleaseâ" your legs wrapped around his waist which let's him to go even deeper inside you, a low moan leaving his lips.
"please, what?" he asks again, his hand slipping down to rub your swollen nub in time with his thrusts. "please stop? please keep going? please let me come?"
"n-no, don'tâ don't... stop... please, don'tâ" you stumble over your words pathetically. a wicked grin spreading across matt's face, seeing you in this state. it was his favorite one.
his hips bucking hard and fast, his dick pushing against your tender spots, making your whole body shake and clench.
"matt, i'm... so closeâ"
at your warning, matt slows down considerably, his smirk widening at your whines in protest. "i asked you a question and you didn't reply," he punctuates his words with a deep, deliberate thrust, grinding against your g-spot.
"what?" you ask dumbly, blinking as your eyes try to focus on his face. "please keep going..."
"i asked why should i give you what you want, when you were teasin' me all day?" he repeats, getting a desperate whimper in response. you couldn't even think and matt was just being cruel on purpose right now, just like you were cruel to him all day.
"matt, pleaseâ"
he chuckles at your plea, teasing you mercilessly with slow, deep strokes that keep you trembling on the brink without pushing you over. "answer me," his voice is a low, taunting murmur as he leans closer, kissing and biting your shoulder, leaving marks. "then maybe i'll let you come."
"i don't... know," you whine, desperately attempting to increase his pace somehow, but he only smirks against your skin, his fingers continue to slowly rub your clit, his cold ring pressed against your skin.
your growing frustration only spurs him on, matt continues the torture, relishing in your helplessness. "you do know, don't be lazy and answer the question..." he lifts his head up to look at your face, "-- unless you don't wanna come, hm? fine with me..."
"noâ" you cut him off, your walls clenching around his dick, making him groan softly. "faster, matt, please... i don't know why i did that, i just wantedâ- i don't know..."
his eyes roaming over your body as he leans back again, looking at where he's joined with you, his dick pulsing, needing some relief. "c'mon, you got this, baby..." he flexes his hips forward, a moan leaving your lips. "you just wanted what?"
"iâ i wanted..." you stutter when he pulls out slowly, then pushing back in, watching your face contort with need. "-- i just wanted you..." another whimper leaving your lips, "i needed you to fuck me, matt, please just..."
"hereee you go... such a good girl f'me--" he praises and finally picks up the pace, keeping you in place by gripping your hips tightly. his movements somehow become even harder, faster, his breathing heavy as he watches you with his bottom lip between his teeth. "begging me so prettily... mmhmm, fuckkk-- c'mon, baby, let me...â" he groans at the feeling of you tightening around him, the signs of your impending orgasm clear. "--let me feel you squeeze my dick, hm?"
you're a moaning mess now, trying to hold onto anything as the pleasure keeps building up back inside you. matt is on the edge himself at the feeling of how hard you clench around him, constant groans and pants leaving his lips, his cock painfully throbbing in you.
"i'm... ohâ matt, m'so... close--"
he grunts in response, lips parted, breath hitching in his throat. he continues pounding into you mercilessly, you feel him so deep that his pelvis rubs against your swollen bud with each thrust. your broken cries fills the kitchen as the knot in your belly releases and the pleasure washes over you. "thaaat's right, baby... so pretty when you cum f'me like thisâ shittt..."
matt lets out a feral roar as he feels your pussy squeeze him like a vice, his own release building up and he explodes inside you, warm drops of cum painting your walls. he keeps fucking you through your and his orgasm, his hips still moving even as he empties himself inside you.
"fuck, fuck, fuck... my girl..." he pants, his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. he lets go off your hips, leaning on his hands on the table as he breathes heavy, making eye contact with you now. he brushes a strand of hair from your face, gently pulling out of you with a wet pop. he looks down at the mess you two made, his cum leaking out of you and dripping onto the table.
"jesus, look at that..." his eyes glistening as he looks back at your fucked out expression. "you good?"
"mhm," you nod, trying to sit up and he quickly helps you, his arm wrapped around your waist while he gives you a kiss on the forehead, making you smile.
"did sooo good for me, baby..." he looks down at you, his heart pounding at the sight of you smiling like that.
"was it worth ruining my lace top?"
"oh, you even dare to ask?" he raises his eyebrow with a smirk. "don' worry, gonna buy you a new one... i kinda fuck with 'em, to be honest, so..." a chuckle escapes your lips as you shake your head in disbelief. "c'mon, let's get you cleaned up..."
he picks you up bridal style, carrying you to the bathroom, your giggles filling the house, making matt's heart bust with love.
taglist: @certifiedstarrr @chrislovespepsi @le4hsblog @sturnsxbitvh @sweetlikesug4rvenom @xaristhings @mattsfavbitchhh @lvrsturniolo @r0s3luvr @slut4brunettes @madisonsturnioloss @chrispillowprincess @sturnioloslutttt4 @ashlishes @mattsbitchh @hi-people-who-are-alive @stellward123 @inssanely @matts-girlfriend @imnotalive420 @emely9274 @shadowthesim @yunkilm @sophiaxsblog @namelesssav @demyackerman @fratbrochrisgf @lvrsturniolo @chrisweetheart @chrisfavoritewhore @sturnslutz @ncm9696 @certified-sturniolo @mattsobvimyfav @swagalicious260 @giannalovessturniolo @sophand4n4 @brazyturtleneck
#matt sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo x fem reader#sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x fem reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo blurb
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I Just Wanna See You Shine (r.c.)
contains: smut (18+), swearing.
rafe cameron x overachiever!reader
summary: everyone counted on you to be the valedictorian, the go-to for tough subjects and the one who never got in trouble. one day, rafe cameron had came up to you for some tutoring but it turns out he was just paying for the pleasure of your company.
i just wanna see you shine âcause i know you are a stargirl.
if everybody was betting on valedictorian, everybody would be betting on you. you were the one person who had it all figured out; high grades, perfect attendance, a reputation for never stepping out of line.
no drama. no distractions. no boyfriend. you were the only person who actually cared about deadlines, assignments and getting into a good college even as a rich kid.
at kildare academy, no one really cared about what you did or didnât do. everyone was rich, privileged, and used to getting what they wanted.
graduation wasnât a huge deal; chances for success were handed to you with a silver spoon. the kooks had money, connections, and opportunities waiting for them at every turn. even if they flunked a test, theyâd still get into the best colleges, all thanks to their familiesâ influence and wealth.
people didnât expect much from your personal life, if anything, they just assumed you didnât have one, too busy studying to bother with parties or boys. and even if you did, rafe cameron would be the last name anyone would think of.
he was everything you werenât; wild, reckless, the kind of guy who didnât care about grades or the future. he drove fast cars, lived life with no sense of direction. and you? you were the complete opposite.
right now, youâd find yourself breaking a rule you swore youâd never cross, all because of that stupid boy.
you knew he was up to no good the minute he slipped those silver glasses off of your face.
this was the tenth-ish guttural moan rafe had let out. his eyes fluttering closed for a moment as he feels your walls squeezing around him. rafe was completely lost to the need, the primal desire for you. the one thing missing from his great list of achievements. his body strained with the effort to resist the urge to take you, to make you his.
rafe was completely at your mercy, completely undone, his body twitching with need as you moved your hips against him. his eyes were locked onto yours, his stare desperate and pleading, his voice a ragged whisper as he moaned your name over and over again, each repetition edged with a hint of desperation, as if he couldnât stand to be without you for even a moment.
âwhy are you so fucking good at this?â he breathed out, a little surprised, but also impressed. his mouth hanging open with every movement.
âone terrible experience,â you replied matter-of-factly. âi didnât bother with anyone else. i donât waste time. iâm a fast learner, though. especially when it comes to⊠watching. visual things tend to stick.â
you never wouldâve imagined that rafe cameron, the kook prince, the guy who practically owned kildare island, would be wrapped around your little finger. but somehow, he was.
his mouth watered as you leaned over him, your boobs hovering so close to his mouth. his hands clenching around the bedsheets, his body rigid as he waits for you to say something.
rafe swallowed hard, his breath coming in quick gasps, his entire body tense and straining with the effort to hold back. the effort to stop himself from rolling you both over and to stop himself from fucking you so dirty, but in this moment, rafe was completely under your control, and he knows it. he can't help but want you.
âyou can touch me.â you held onto his shoulder for some sense of control as you continued rolling your hips. rafe let out a low, guttural moan as you gave him permission, his eyes closing briefly as he waited for you to descend closer. then he leaned upwards, taking your breast in his mouth, his tongue swirling around your nipple as he suckles you, his hands moving to your hips, holding you in place.
rafeâs hips bucked up into you as he slid himself deeper, his voice a low, ragged moan. âyou feel so good..â he gasps. âfeel so damn goodâŠi canât get enough of youâŠfuckâŠâ
âyeah?â your thumb moved to rub over his bottom lip. âcanât get enough of me?â
rafeâs hands grabbed at your hips, his touch nearly painful.
âweâre gonna do this again, and again, and again, darlinâ,â he muttered, his voice low and rough as he thrusted up into you. âallâ slap. ânight.â slap. âlong.â slap.
you pulled on your clothes, moving quietly as rafe laid there, worn out and more exhausted than youâd ever seen him. but that smile tugging at the creases of his lipsâhis smirk that you knew so well was still there. his voice broke the silence, his tone lazy, but with that familiar edge of smugness. âlooks like i got something, or someone, to add to my collection,â he said, the words carrying a challenge, as though he was satisfied by the moment but still trying to hold some control.
as you reached for your shoes, he propped himself up on one elbow, his voice thick with that cocky tone as he started running his mouth again. âwell, well, look at you. the overachiever, the one everybody thought was untouchable, sucked right into my world.â rafe let out a low chuckle and his eyes locked onto yours. "guess it fits the narrative. you were the only thing missing from the story.â
you stood up, slipping on your shoes but you couldn't help the grin that tugged at your lips even if his words punched your ego so badly.
moving closer, you leaned down slightly, lowering your voice to a seductive whisper. "if you tell anyone," you said, your words deliberate, "iâll have to tell them about how you were so willing to submit and how you were shaking and almost crying under my control.â
without giving him a chance to say anything back, you pressed a quick kiss to his lips, a short one but it left a spark behind. you walked confidently to the door, not glancing back until you reached the threshold.
âsee you around, kook prince,â you tossed your bag over your shoulder. rafe shifted, a devilish smirk lighting up his face, and replied with that trademark cockiness, âsee you around, princess.â
#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x reader#rafe fluff#smut#rafe smut#outer banks smut#rafe imagine#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron drabble#fluff#rafe x you#rafe x you smut#rafe cameron x you#rafe fic
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Cort, this is a masterpiece. Your prose is really something to behold, and the way you weave a story together with incredible detail and believable dialogue is just incredible. This whole universe feels like it could be a scene from a movie. I especially loved how you describe the greenhouse- I could picture it so clearly in my mind's eye and smell the fertilizer, feel the humidity in my skin.
Solomon/the entity makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. I don't know how you do it, but you bring out the demonic spirit in him through your writing in such a vivid, terrifying way. It's magic.
In answer to some of your questions, I think it would add a complicated twist to the story to have Bartomolé in love with the mc in some way. Whether or not it's requited is up to chance, I think, but I like the added complication if you choose to take it that way.
I'm not interested personally in vivid physical descriptors of the demon- I like the psychological aspect of it a little better.
As far as mc being more experienced sexually, I think it's a fine line. I like that she maybe experimented with opium, but the level of promiscuity is maybe a little ooc for how I perceive her. She's not a prude, I don't think, but I get the sense that she's maybe a little bit inexperienced, especially with how intense the sex seems to be when the demon is fucking her. I can't recall details of imposter- I think I remember her feeling quite bored and disenchanted with their sex life, so I do think she enjoys good sex, but how much she's experimented is, to me, probably minimal.
I have no idea who the demon is..
Get as detailed as you want with the smut. Your demographic here on tumblr would probably thank you.
ROOT ROT
possessed!scholar husband x reader|3.7k| 18+
following your cold and reticent husband's return from settling affairs with his deceased uncle's estate, he has changed and done things unheard of. once a great lover of botany and entomology, he has razed his garden to the ground as proof of his love to you. this manâthis thingâos not your husband.
warnings;; pseudo-victorian setting, dubcon, mentioned dp, mentioned temperature play, cumshot on body, cum eating, other explicit sexual details, mentions of drug use (opium), unrequited love, hypnosis/trance, some horrific imagery, detail & prose heavy, roughly proofread.
this is a companion piece to imposter. you don't have to read it, but if you want a better idea of what is going on, I suggest you do!
a/n; I reappear after a month hiatus with this piece. I have questions and notes at the end of the fic that I'd love to have feedback to!
please reblog this if you've read it, guys! help keep your favorite writing and authors on this website by reblogging their work!!
âHe is simply not himself!â
BartolomĂ© Medina knew his best friend better than you knew your husband, so you believed him when he said that your husbandâs newly acquired, increasing eccentricities were not some fictitious imagining of yours.
Although, Medina himself could not explain the unexplainable and all of the oddness without growing visibly flustered.
A bit flushed in the face, singeing the roundness of his ears. He'd stamp out your justifications for strangeness in the same way he did the fine cigars he'd been accustomed to sharing with his friend, yet had not for quite sometime now.
âAnd you say his garden is dead?â Medina looked stricken with dread, suddenly ill by repeating something so blasphemous. âNow, my dear, please don't mistake my shock as disbelief. I very much believe in what you're saying. I've seen Solomon and his weirdness! Why, just this morning over breakfast, at a time where you were still tucked away in deep sleep, he wouldn't drink his coffee. So bizarre! That man knows the thousands of tastes and varieties of coffee beans, and he spat the very stuff out on the floor like it'd never once touched his tongue!
âBut his garden? A botanist without his garden is like a bird without wings. A dog without a tail to wag. A newborn without his motherâs teat! Vulgar, I understand, but you see my point.â He drank from a heavy glass in his hand. The inside had nearly spilled over at one point with light brown which glittered gold under the overhead light, smelling slightly sour and earthy. âTo think that Solomon would let it all die. Something is wrong. Something has happened to my only true friend and to your husband.â
You did not drink with any enthusiasm or anguish from your own cup, rather you used those seconds of delicate sipping to gap the conversation, separate yourself from it all for just a moment. You'd had your time to grieve and contend with knowing the man you had married and come to love was not the same one who kept you awake at night.
Solomon had once been a reclusive and reticent man, the only son of David Agrippa and sole heir of the Agrippa Diamond Mines and Jewelry Galleria. He'd never been able to replicate his father's ardor for business and entrepreneurship, choosing towards academic ventures of entomology and botany and most of everything belonging to the natural world instead.
Among his most prized things was a sprawling, domed greenhouse made of large sheets of pale blue-green glass soldered with metal which shifted rose-gold in bright daylight.
âI loved his garden, but I didn't much like to be in there with him,â you confessed, forgetting your manners as you kept your cup still against your lips, mumbling your words. âHe liked to tell me about the plants and flowers he grew. Most of it I could never hope to understand, but⊠I loved seeing him come alive. He seemed to glow when he could tell me things, so I got into the habit of listening to him when he wanted to speak.â
Medina, not yet drunk or driven to any untoward behavior, set aside his empty vessel with jittering ice cubes and looked at you admiringly. âYou said that you didn't like being in there with him? Why?â
âThe bees. The bugs. The humidity. The fertilizer he liked to use because of the nitrogen content. He told me that it mattered what he used and couldn't just break up soil from the yard.â You said, tilting your cup.
After taking another sip, you determined you hated the taste of the liquor and how it slid down along your throat like fire trailing an oil spill, yet clung there with residual, syrupy stickiness that nearly made you gag.
âWhy did you keep going inside?â Medina asked tranquilly, much of his previous frustration softened, body and soul warmed by the alcohol and how fondly he regarded your sweetness towards his friend.
You thought very little before answering, âI wanted to be where he was. It didn't matter to me if that meant his greenhouse or the coldest part of the arctic.â
That was the truth of it. Once you'd received the first crumbs of understanding who Solomon truly was beneath his stolid exterior built brick-by-brick from tragedy and grief and a lifetime of emotional ineptitude, you would've gone to any length to see more of him. To see his pale eyes gain a wild, flickering candlelight of passion, and the faintest of trembling smiles disguising how deeply your questions had aroused his soul.
In those moments, he revealed to you the things he loved the most and what you envied the most: the natural world.
The flittering, fat-bodied pollinators whose entire world were yellow and red flowers with succulent centers and lush, girthy leaves where they'd rest their weary, iridescent wings and could never understand your husband's appreciation of them.
The thousands of specimens he'd collected from every corner of the world and articulated thoughtfully against wood and felt. Their dead little limbs were pinned in place; perfect mimicry of how they would've been if still alive and crawling. Heâd had them all meticulously framed and arranged across the walls in his office; trophies of his success, of his studies and hard work.
The innumerable plants and flowers he trimmed and watered in his greenhouse and the ones not contained within it. Some species he had planted in the yard, others in the cool shade of the nearby woods where they smothered native varieties with tendrils-like vines and climbed upside trees. More aquatic species were placed by the edge of the lake, growing into the water; buoyant; a woman's deep dark hair reaching forever for the surface.
He had turned the lonely, sprawling estate into a monument of life, of love that did not belong to you. And for that, sometimes you hated living there. Hated the things that he loved.
Choking the plants, poisoning their roots with any number of things from your fatherâs pharmacy crossed your mind more than once.
Feeding the bees something enticingly sweet and deadly; filling the greenhouse with noxious gas at night while they slept on their big leaves and your husband in his bed. It would've been such an easy thing for you to doâown your husband's grief as you held his face in your hands and comforted him in the morning when all had atrophied and rotted.
But, those feelings had become a reality you truly never wished to have seen after Solomon returned from his deceased uncle's estate months ago.
He was not the same man.
âTell me what happened.â Medinaâs voice buzzed in your ear from nearby, closer than it had been before. Your hand was caressed by tight warmthâhis holding yours, his handsome face looking up at you from where he had crouched in front of your chair. âTell me everything you've seen. It's of grave importance that you remember it all, as curing Solomon from his affliction relies solely upon you.â
You could not deny his earnestness, the squeeze of his fingers. A promise that he would not be easily shattered by what you had to say, and would think no less of his friend for it. Within his sincere stare, you saw the gleam of another, secret promise. The likes of which you pretended not to see, that he'd never speak of out loud.
âIâŠâ you distracted yourself with the embroidery on your clothes, pinching loose threads and beads. âIt was subtle, at first. I noticed some of the bees were dead on the ground. And then some plants had started developing spots. Leaves turned brown and yellow and fell off. A lot of them withered, even though their soil was still damp when I checkedâŠâ
And then, the morning came where you witnessed Solomon among a carnage of broken stalks weeping foul-smelling sap, leaves he'd ripped apart with his own hands, and some of his larger flowering plants with fiery manes completely severed. Their bountiful heads lay at his feet, flattened by the heel of his boot as he walked aimlessly, snipping and tearing indiscriminately.
âMy god, Solomon! Stop!â you stepped around the countless tiny, contracted bodies of bees and other pollinators to reach him. He let go of the gardening shears as you grabbed them. âWhat are you doing?! What have you done?! Decades of work! Gone! Are you mad?!â
âWell, you've gone and ruined my surprise for you. I've been working on it for hours. I didn't expect you would be awake so soon.â Solomon said, sounding much like himself despite the savagery he stood surrounded by. He smiled at you in an unfamiliar way, as if trying to navigate his facial muscles around a mask. âIsn't it simply wonderful?â
The sweltering humidity trapped within this greenhouse of death had turned the air stagnant and foul, heavily pungent of detritus and mildew. Across all zones of the greenhouse, once painstakingly organized and labeled for the purpose of easier cataloging, no slithers of greenery or color remained. Each step you took in any direction seemed to sink you deeper into the decay, wet gurgling underfoot as you crossed stumpy mounds of plants and flowers he'd destroyed and thrown into piles.
âHow could you? My husband spent almost twenty years building this garden and studying it. This was his lifeâs work!â You wished you could force life back into the severed plants; pray that the ground of yellow-brown waste would suddenly freckle with tiny, green sprouts and grow with thick stalks and thorns to keep his hands away.
âI am your husband.â Solomon took the gardening shears from your hand and tossed them aside. He leaned into your body, nose and lips pressed into the fabric covering your neck. âI've only done what you wanted. What you wished you could've done yourself, but never did.â
You flinched against the movement of his hands smoothing down your waist to the notches in your hips. Sliding inward, he unfastened the hook-and-loops and buttons holding your trousers up to push them down your thighs along with your undergarments.
âI know your thoughts and what you really think. I've been listening the entire time. I've always been listening.â Solomon let his hips roll along the back of his hand while he used his fingers to lay long, languid strokes on you. âIt was tiring, wasn't it? Always competing for love and affection in a place like this. You were never going to have what you wanted. Not with this place still standing. Not with his ineptitudes and selfishness.â
His touch weakened you indescribably; like the caress of heat from the fireplace against your bare skin once the opium had taken effect. Swapping tiny pills on wet tongues with your maid until they'd dissolved into saliva and into your cheeks. You explored one another's bodies thoroughly on those cold nights, silky with sweat from the fire and exertion.
Yet, this was not the same as back then when the sexual appetite of two teenagers transcended societal morals.
Solomon encompassed you in a feeling; consumed you without ever digging into you with his teeth or nails. He could whisper hideous secrets and depravities to you to tip you over into searing euphoria. He had once penetrated you with a hot metal phallus resting on top of his own, thrusting with both until the metal cooled, and you still came anyway.
He'd put worse inside your body and done far worse than that in only a few short months since returning home, yet he never tired of the torture and you remained malleable and enthralled by it all.
âGod, you are beautiful. And you are mine.â Solomon had maneuvered both your bodies to the ground, atop of the soggy detritus. Your back was exposed to the mush, leaves, and crushed flower petals, weight pushing an indentation in the loose soil. âThis is the fruition of your desires, darling. Don't you love it? Destroying what he loved so you could have it all?â
The one who came back to you was not Solomon; the one fucking you into waste and dirt was not Solomon, either. You told yourself you needed to love imposter as well, because he looked like your husband; wore his signet ring, too.
At night, you imagined only his softest expressions behind clenched eyelids when he wanted to have his way with you, as something else entirely took his place. A creature so diabolical and unsightly that the servants now awaited your screams to rouse them awake in the murky midnight hours.
Every time they arrived with their candlesticks and oil lanterns, the thrusting spectre receded into the dark as a black mass hardly distinguishable from shadow.
Only Solomon would remain, and he was swift to send the servants away before they could see your improper, disheveled state sprawled across the bed sheets.
In the daytime light, his face stayed familiar and comforting to you and you could bear to see him, form some coherent words.
âSomeone mightâmight see us out here, Solomon. Mr. Medina is supposed toâoh, oh, mmmâheâs due to arrive at any time.â You were given several long kisses, which turned into severe caresses of hot breath when his thrusts turned savage, cock reaching so deep you were starting to feel numb below the waist. A feverous response. âOh, fuck, fuck, fuckâŠâ
He adjusted himself to lay on your chest, the sweat on your bodies offering an effortless glide and new angle for his cock that made your moans deeper and dire. Such sounds, whether in agony or pleasure, were melodious to him. Addicting drags from a pipe in an opium den; an alcoholic's first sip at breakfast; a cheating man's night with a new lover.
âWouldn't you like for them to see that? For someone to witness you being fucked into the ground? Surrounded by everything their master loved?â Solomon tucked his face into the curve of your neck and groaned, hips slow and stuttering. âBartolomĂ© would be the one to find it most tantalizing. His only friend in the world ruining the only person he's ever loved. Wouldn't that be a sight? We could invite him to watch.â
At the time, it had been quite jarring to learn Bartolomé harbored those silent, ardent feelings for you. It had sufficiently pulled you from whatever trance Solomon had lulled you into, reacquainting you with all the sounds of sex and the filth clinging to your skin. It was as though your mind had been locked into a mostly airless, noiseless void that he controlled and released at will.
You held tight to his shoulders as he molded you deeper into the muck and plant litter. The squat, friable walls of soil holding your shape like the cushions in a tomb, whereas Solomon was the man lowering you into the dark earth; the last to see your face before covering it in clay and dirt.
He was in your ear with loud moans that resonated through you, simultaneously as carnal as a beast amidst its seasonal rut, and velvety as the feathery smooth glide of fingers down your spine. His throat rumbled against you, resembling the intensity of a purring housecat nestled near your head in contentment.
At his tipping point, he removed his cock from your body and used the slippery stuff glistening off it to stroke himself; weepy, deep red tip to the base. You received the aftermath of his release in thick ropes across your abdomen and chest, the warmth of it already cooling on your skin while he continuously kneaded the head to force out what remained as if they were dewdrops made from pearls.
âHow do you think BartolomĂ© would fare seeing you like this?â Solomon swept two fingers through the cum in an elegant curl to smear it around his cock. The viscous white thinned into pale gloss on his girth and a sticky residue inside his hand.
Your lips parted to give an answer, but his fingers and taste were faster than your words.
âAnd⊠that is all? Truly?â BartolomĂ© asked, shattering your visions of the recent past as he revealed a compact silver case from inside his vest, pulling a cigarette from within it. âYou simply walked into the garden one morning and saw that he had destroyed everything? He gave you no explanation whatsoever?â
The imposter had stolen much of your dignity over the months, but enough of it remained for you to omit every significant detail from your story. You'd only told him that Solomon had cut the heads off of rare flowers, mumbled in a disorienting way, and gave you no difficulty with the gardening shears.
Bartolomé went away from your side for an open window across the spacious sitting room, matching his cigarette and blowing gray plumes out into the dense summer air.
âThis is concerning.â He spoke loud enough for you to hear, even with his thumbnail tracing the underside of his lower lip, muffling him somewhat. âSolomon is considerably worse off than I first thought. We need to investigate this, retrace his every step since the moment he left you that night for his uncle's estate.â
âOh, BartolomĂ©, that will be very unnecessary.â Solomon announced himself as he walked in through the open doors, offering you a tepid smile, which came nowhere close to reaching his eyes. Your chair jostled slightly as he stood behind it, a weighty hand landing on the tall back above your head. âWhy trouble yourself with employing some ludicrous scheme when you could, ah, inquire as to what haunts you instead?â
BartolomĂ© tamped out his cigarette on the windowsill and pocketed it. âYou are ill, Solomon. You may be suffering from some form of hysteria. It's time you visited a doctor, my old friend.â
âWell, that just isn't true.â Solomon kept the neutrality in his tone, but you tracked a rumble of agitation; a warning not far off. His hand followed the curvature of the chair down to the arm that you leaned against, fingers touching your shoulder, lightly kneading you through your clothes.
He was sure to be in BartolomĂ©âs eyesight as he did this, further aggravating the heavy disquiet. You didn't dare to move out of reach of his touch.
âBut, it is true, Solomon!â BartolomĂ© insisted, gesturing toward the window. âWhat of your garden? All of your life's work now means nothing, you damned fool! You've snapped, old boy. See a doctor before you do something you regret.â
âThat garden was more a source of misery than it was a boon. At any rate, I'm quite finished listening to you harp at me for one night, my dear friend.â Solomon lightly stroked down your cheek with bent fingers, coaxing you to look up at him. âIt's time for bed, darling. Us impropertious brutes have kept you up for too long.â
You hesitated, and then stood when Solomon took your arm. âAlright.â
âAs usual, your accommodations should exceed expectations. I'll have a servant wake you for breakfast again tomorrow.â It was too soon to call those Solomon's departing words to BartolomĂ©, as he stopped with you in the doorway, your hand caressing the meat of his forearm. âYou know, BartolomĂ©, I would recommend marrying soon. There is no greater feeling than having the one you love so close to you, don't you think?â
Bartolomé became unreadable as he fished a hand into his vest pocket for the cigarette case again. You were led away for the bedroom before anything else could be said, but you knew that Solomon had struck a nerve.
âThat was cruel.â you said.
Once in the bedroom, your back was pressed flush to the door while he unfastened the buttons to your outerwear and the blouse underneath it. Solomon kissed your lips slowly, first, before moving underside your jaw after shucking you down to your undergarments.
âAnd you are mine. You made your vows to me. Remember that, my sweet.â
You watched him strip out of his clothes and then stroke the length of his cock until it was hard.
âI married someone else. Not you.â
As he dimmed the lights within the space, sweeping the bedroom under a shroud of near pitch black, your annoyance shifted into a swell of anxiety both freezing cold and burning hot. Your body pulsed in rhythm with your wild heartbeat, throat clenched as tightly as infantile flower buds.
You waited for Solomon to touch you, startling once he finally did. His fingers had elongated and sharpened, his touch now far more delicate and methodical.
âDon't worry, heâs still in here with me.â
a/n; so, some notes real quick
do not count this scene as canon bc idk how much I'm going to take from it to incorporate into the actual story. like, certain things will be there fs, but a good chunk won't.
tbh, this didn't go as hard as I thought it was going to. by comparison to the actual story, this is pretty tame. but I've already relented that the full story is just hopelessly slutty and pornographic lmaooo
bartolomĂ© medina was actually included late into my current version of the story outline. I wanted a somewhat paralleling foil character for solomon, and he's who I came up with. in a lot of ways, bartolomĂ© and solomon are very similar, which is why they get along so well as friends. but, they're also starkly different in other aspects (e.g. wealth differences, careers, bartolomĂ© forces his sociability and personality, whereas solomon can't be fucking bothered). tbh, I love bartolomĂ© as a character and this oneshot does not do him justiceâat all.
sadiya, mc's maid, is actually the most important supporting character in the entire story and is completely different from her first appearance in imposter. like, completely. I'd like to do one more concept piece where I can actually introduce her.
men moaning is one of the hottest things imo. get out of here with that silent ejaculating bs.
NOW, ONTO QUESTIONS!!!
what are your thoughts on me incorporating the idea that bartolomé is in love with mc into the actual story? there is a possibility of an ending with him if enough folks show interest before the final chapters. or, would you prefer it strictly focused on solomon, the demon, and mc? this subplot would not come to fruition as a side romance or "cheating" plotline. like I said, bartolomé exists mainly as a parallel and foil for solomon.
are you guys interested in smut scenes with actual, explicit details of the demon in his true form (he ain't pretty y'all. this story is majorly psychological for a reason). but, if you kinky fucks want it, I'm happy to oblige.
would having a bolder mc who experimented with things (mainly opium) and has a bit more of a sexually promiscuous background take you out of immersion and be a deterrent, or would you be interested in me continuing that route? be honest.
I dropped several hints in this piece on the inspired identity of the demon in the story. have you guessed who? đ
how depraved y'all want me to get with the smut scenes fr???
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" m'sorry officer. "
dealer!chris sturniolo x cop!reader
(Readers name: Auriella/ Auri Robbins.)
warnings!: smut, (p into v), dom!chris, sex in a car, mentions of drugs. Car speeding (illegal do not imitate!!)
wc: 1.8k
â Your first day at your new job as a cop is quite eventful. You stop a reckless driver until you realise who it is, an old friend from high school, Chris Sturniolo. Reminders of your teengage years, lead to something that could definitely get you fired.
You gather your neatly folded pile of uniform, setting it down on your bed before you carefully button it up onto yourself, clicking your belt together. You walk over to your bathroom mirror and stare at the shiny new badge you have pinned to your royal blue shirt.
You feel proud. You made it. First day on the job, you're ecstatic.
Your boots click against the floor loudly, their shiny and new, not broken in yet. The tough leather is rubbing against the heel of your foot, but you ignore it and continue to walk toward the car your boss is sitting in.
"Good to see you again, Robbins." He tells you the same as every other morning at 7am sharp. Your day flies by fast. You don't do much, mostly just lounge around in the police car and nosy into minor drug cases, and hand out a few tickets, nothing that matters.
Dissatisfied with your uneventful day, you stroll back to the car, waiting patiently for your colleague to return from the store he was in. You bite your nails out of boredom, play with strands of your hair.
Anything that could satisfy your mind for even a minute would be nice.
You wanted to solve real cases. To stop someone dangerous or take down a big crime, something that would promote you and make your bosses proud. You didn't want to be sitting in an old dusty police car with stained leather seats and only arresting fourteen year old boys who thought they were cool for selling class B drugs from their school backpack.
It bored you quite frankly, and you wanted something real.
A car zooms past, and it had to have been over going over 90.
The echoing screech of the tires woke you up from your thoughts. "Fuck!" You shout, starting up the car.
You disregard your colleague in the store, push your foot down, and set off on a chase. It was a stupid idea in reality.
You should've gotten on your radio and called for someone else to intercept them. It's unlikely you'll catch up with the speeding car on your own.
Your lights are now blaring, the loud warning and red and blue lights flash rapidly as you speed down the road towards the car. Switching lanes and forcing him to pull over, you stop the car as he accepts his fate.
Feeling proud of your first real catch, you exit the car with pure euphoria flowing through your veins, your legs feel tingly, and you can't help but smile slightly as you walk up to the window.
The dark, tinted window rolls down slowly, "m'sorry officer." A familiar voice apologises from inside.
"You were speeding a lot." You emphasise the 'a lot' of your phrase hinting at the severity and wondering if you'd be getting a bonus for this or something.
The man's face is revealed as he turns his head to pass you his licence. "Chris?" You question, holding his licence closer to your face to check you weren't mistaken. "Oh shit! Auri, that you?" He realises.
"Damn, so you're a cop now?" He laughs, taking in the look of your full uniform and pinned up hair.
"Yeah, I am." You respond with a hint of an ego, proud of your achievement.
"That's crazy, I remember when you couldn't pass math." He chuckles.
"I might just give you two tickets for bringing that up." You tell him in a sarcastic tone.
"You wouldn't give me a ticket, would you Auri?" He tilts his head like a puppy.
"Well, you were speeding, fast- like really fucking fast." You say.
"Yeah, I know, m'sorry, let me off this time kay?" He asks, his hand placed on the wheel firmly and his eyes locked in on yours.
You wouldn't break. This was a serious offence. He could've crashed into someone. You have to take him in, or atleast give him a ticket.
He notices you thinking, your body turning stiffer and your arms more firmly crossed, he worries he won't get away with this.
"C'mon Auri, remember all the good times we had."
He says good differently, you knew why.
Just because you fucked once or twice when you were teens doesn't mean you owe him anything, you know that. But when he tilts his head at you, when he pleads a little, seeing his hand gripping the wheel...
The pressure broke you. You tell him you'll let him off this once, but if you ever see him do this again, he's not getting away with it.
"What are you doing driving out here alone anyway?" You question him.
"I just wanted to go for a drive alone, clear my thoughts n' stuff you know." He lies through his teeth.
You could tell he was making up an excuse on the spot, but you'd kind of stopped caring, distracted by him, his eyes, hands, you hadn't seen him in so long.
"You know, I've missed you, Auriella." He whispers.
You couldn't tell if this one was a lie or not.
You smile. "Let me take you for a drive, hm?" He asks.
"Is that one of your jokes?" You respond with a straight face.
"No. Seriously, c'mon Auri, like we used to. You used to let me drive you around fast, even before I had my licence." He smirks.
He was a terrible influence on you in your teenage years. He distracted you from your studies. Got you into a little weed every now and again and would drive you around in his dad's car that he'd steal.
In reality, he hadn't done that to you. Maybe you had. But you like to blame him, you'll never admit you were a little rebellious, you'll never admit you did illegal things, or that you'd fuck in the backseat of his car, it would be the opposite of your pristine, princess reputation.
"No, I gotta go. Let's just forget about this." You tell him sharply, turning away.
He grips onto your bare arm. You turn back your head, "Auri, one last time?" He asks of you.
Shit. Okay, now you had to go. He was looking all begging and cute like he used to. One last time right? Couldn't hurt hm?
You get into the passenger seat of his car and clip on your seat belt. He laughs hearing the click of it. You've become 'uptight' to him, not like you used to be. You've grown up, matured, he hasn't, he's still racing around.
The car speeds off, your head jolts backwards at the impact, and the car soon becomes steady but speeds up quickly.
You'd forgotten about the rush.
The euphoria, the butterflies you'd get, the feeling like you were floating as the car went 100 miles an hour. I was watching intently as the numbers went up higher on the screen. 60. 70. 80. 90...100 mph.
You were obsessed with it. It was an awful and dangerous thing, but that added to the excitement of it all, the wondering if that night was the night you were going to die. It was exhilarating. It made you so anxious. You loved it. You felt 17 again.
The car slows down, eventually coming to a stop as your smile fades and Chris' giggles stop. He looks at you, a dirty look. Something you faintly recognised as you'd tried to scrub it from your mind many times.
His hand lifts from the wheel to your face, he grabs it impulsively and rough like he used to, pushing his lips onto yours.
Your hands roam through his hair. He kisses you harder, rougher, and it reminds you of the way he used to. He pulls away, his lips now latched onto your neck, and he leaves kisses, as he whispers in your ear about how much he's missed you.
He's unbuckling his belt. You give in and do the same, "I missed you so much, I missed this so much too." He whispers.
Fuck. That was all you needed. He might as well have hypnotised you into jumping into the backseat with your pants off.
The next thing you know, that's exactly where you are. He's on top of you, lining himself up with your entrance, pushing his tip against you, sliding himself in slowly.
You moan out quietly, your eyes shut. "Open your eyes, Auri. I wanna you to look at me like you used to." He asks.
You lock eyes with him as he pumps himself deep into you, hitting the right spot repeatedly, untying a knot in your stomach you only just realised was there.
His sweating, bare chest is hitting yours. He bottoms out inside of you, the entirety of his dick, pushing as far in as he could go.
He gets rougher, something you won't admit you like too. He's practically ramming in and out of you, which was the dirty secret you loved.
Your eyes well up with tears. It's a weirdly nostalgic feeling as you come to your high, as euphoric as the drive earlier.
You feel your legs shake around him, the grunts he utters become quiet, as you're blinded by white spots clouding your vision, your eyebrows turning up, and your mouth hanging open wide.
His throbbing cock twitches inside of you, he coats you with warm, wet release as your back arches up at the feel of it, you join him.
You suddenly become aware of what you've done and where you are.
"This was bad." You say worriedly.
"The sex?" Chris scoffs, his eyes wide open.
"No-no, not that.. this. I'm gonna get fired, Chris!" You yelp out.
"I'm sure you won't. I'll help you come up with a lie for why you were gone, trust me." He insists.
You can barely hear him talking over your fast beating heart and your raspy breath as you pull up your underwear. All you can think about is what you'll tell your boss. That you ran off to go on a fast drive and fuck an old friend?
Chris grabs onto your shoulders with his hands, "Listen, I'm good at lying. I'll get you out of this kay?" He reassures you.
Your eyes are darting around until they fixate on something, something you hadn't noticed before, being too busy to see, bags in the trunk of the car.
You lift your head up to see what's in the trunk. You let out a gasp.
"Chris are you fucking kidding me!" You scream.
"Shush, shush-fuck Auri, chill." He shushes you and turns you away from the drugs which are resting in his cars trunk.
"Drug dealer? Chris for real?" You mumble, his hand over your mouth.
"Yes, quit freaking out about it, God." He begs.
"You're a drug dealer and you thought it would be appropriate to fuck a police officer!" You yell.
"Oh my god, Auri! Quit screaming it to everyone!" He pleads.
"This is insane." You tell him, your eyes wide open, staring at him.
"Listen, maybe we can hatch a little agreement, okay?" He starts...
That's it for today! Please comment/tell me if you want a part two to this! Please also interact if you liked this. Thank you for reading cutiesss!!
Taglist: @matthewsroses @chrislilcumslvt @pvssychicken @ivysturnss @mattsbitchh @sturniolo-fann @matts-myloverboy @emely9274 @sophand4n4 @uncannyguava @certifiedstarrr @chrissweetheart
#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo fandom#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo smut#sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo fan fiction#chris sturniolo story#sturniolo smut fics#matt sturniolo smut#sturniolo#sturniolo smut fic
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Valeria Garza X reader mutual masturbation đ maybe it turns into the reader and Valeria scissoring really hard with one another until they squirt idkkkk
Hiding behind anon because im a pussy LMAOAOAO (I am over the age of 18 though ^^ /gen)
You're so real for this, anon. (I'd also hide behind Anon, can't be caught lacking.)
I did some research for this one (Thank you twitter.) I've wrote smut before but there's only so much I can do when I've never experienced it myself #maidenlessloser
Hopefully that means the scissoring part was written well.
Tags/Warning: Pure Filthy Smut, Mutual Masturbation, Scissoring, Squirting, No Plot At All, LESBIAN SEX!!!!
Quid Pro Quo
'You owe me.' those were the words muttered after Valeria lent you money to pay off your debt to different loan sharks. You didn't ask her for the money and you're not sure how she knew about your debt. You were hesitant in accepting her money because then you're just in debt to her. The loan sharks were starting to get inpatient and that was a health hazard. You thought she'd ask you to pay her back or do a bunch of neck breaking tasks. That's not what she wanted.
"What?" You ask, wondering if you heard her right. She stares at you from under hooded eyes across from you. Leaning back in her chair with her legs spread.
"I said, I want you to touch yourself for me." She enunciates slowly, like she thinks you're stupid.
Your face heats. "Like masturbation?" You ask carefully.
Valeria rolls her eyes, ringed fingers tapping the wooden table impatiently. "Is there another way to interpret 'I want you to touch yourself for me' that I am not aware of?"
You sit stiffly with your hands politely folded in your lap.
"You want me to masturbate in front of you."
"Yes." She says with exasperation.
You furrow your brows at her, trying to come up with a reason as to why she'd want that. Your mind blanks. "Why?"
Valeria leans forward, eyes locked on yours. "Because I want you humiliated and leaking all over my desk."
Her words are brash and to the point. Sending heat across your face and to your lower regions.
"Right now?" You ask quietly. Looking around. The door behind you is closed but not locked. You picture yourself with your fingers deep inside of you, Valeria sitting there still as a statue, and someone barging in.
"Yes, now." Valeria says. "Take off your pants."
"... Will you kill me if I refuse?" You ask nervosuly.
Valeria's lips curl in disgust. "Killing someone for rejecting my advances is beneath me. I'll just have you fired."
That's not very ideal either but it does give you a choice.Â
Do you really care about your job enough to degrade yourself like this? You let your eyes wander over her toned and tattooed forearms, over the swell of her chest under that gray tank top. She's an evil bitch. An evil bitch coercing you into doing a sexual favour for her. It feels erotic in nature, as much as you hate to feel that way. Were you not attracted to her you'd say no and look for another job.Â
"Well?" Valeria raises a brow.
"Okay." You mutter reluctantly. Valeria's lips curl into a small smirk. She gestures for you to take a seat on her desk.
You hesitate before climbing up onto your knees and sitting. You wait for further instruction, but Valeria just stubbornly stares at you. You sigh and lean back, fumbling with your pants before sliding them off, not bothering to make it look nice. You're already giving her a show after all. You let them fall to the ground and begin to work on your underwear next.
"Slower." Valeria barks.
you swallow back an angry reply, slowing your movements. You peel your panties away from your body, embarrassed by the way they stick to your folds. You're surprised by how wet you already are. And a little ashamed.
You carefully set down your panties next you and spread your legs. Too aware of how visible you are. You feel a twinge of insecurity. You've had partners in the past, but not once have you been this exposed or scrutinized. You slowly trail your hand over your stomach. Slowly you push your fingers through your wet folds, gathering up slick onto your fingers. You prod around your entrance before rubbing circles around your clit.
Valeria makes no noise. Just sits there and watches. Honestly, her insulting you would make this experience less uncomfortable than her stony silence. You rub a little harder, hitting an angle that makes you arch your back with a gasp. Your fingers trail down once more, and you slip one inside of you experimentally. It slides in with ease and you slowly pump it inside of you.
Rusling fabric reaches your ears, and you tilt your head to see what it is. Just in time to watch Valeria discard her pants. You go still when you see her slip her hand beneath the elastic band of her panties. She meets your gaze with a scowl.
"I didn't say you could stop."
Quickly you resume. Valeria's heavy breathing sends heat through you, making your walls flutter with excitement. You moan a little louder, exaggerating it just a little for her. You buck against your own hand after adding a second finger. Sqeezing and pulling them deeper into your wetness.
Valeria matches your pace. Swiftly pounding into her cunt with her own fingers. Soaking her panties and the chair from the sight of you spread open on her desk. She can see the cloudy liquid of your arousal leaking around your fingers. Slowly dripping down onto the desk and collecting into a small puddle.
she curls her fingers, seeking that spot inside of her that makes her vision blur. Your moaning makes her inner walls pulse. Throbbing out with need. She stops, unable to take it anymore. Valeria wasn't planning on touching you, but she can't control herself. She stands and grabs you, forcing you onto your stomach. You blink in surprise, hand retreating from your pussy. She clumsily peels off her underwear and lifts one of your legs onto the desk, taking in the sight of your raw, puffy cunt.
Without hesitating she slots herself against you, sliding her folds into yours roughly. You gasp and whine, not complaining at all about the turn of events. This wasn't a part of the deal, but you don't care. Not while she's grinding into you and moaning in your ear. Her pace is fast and rough. Her hands grip onto your hips, aiding in her task. Your pussy throbs and weeps. Thick arousal leaking from you and dripping down your thigh, wetting her mound. she slams herself into you, grunting and panting. The loud slap of skin on skin almost drowns her out. Valeria reaches up and squeezes her breast painfully, adding to the stimulation. Something inside of you snaps. The pleasure and sensation becoming too much. You feel wetness rushing out of you. Each pulse sending more of it to the ground. You hear it audibly splash.
Valeria groans. Feeling it hit her legs. She trembles and sobs, feeling her own dam break. she doesn't stop or slow as she releases. Liquid squirts from her hole, soaking her legs and the floor, accumulates in her folds. she's left recklessly humping on you while the both of you cum. Making a mixed mess of arousal. Her legs shake and she finally falls still. Leaning on top of you, crushing you to the desk. Both you and Valeria can smell the aftermath. Covering your legs and the floor. Her warm breath hits your shoulder blade as the both of you catch your breath. She slowly pulls off you, the space between her thighs wet and slippery.
Your ass is left hanging off the desk, the consequences of your copulation running down your legs. She spreads you, watching your empty hole glisten and flutter.
"Consider your debt repaid." She says.
Your leg twitches. You're too fucked out to form a response. you think you may need to borrow money from her again sometime soon.
#valeria garza#cod mw2#valeria garza x reader#valeria garza x fem!reader#modern warefare ii#cod mwii#valeria garza cod#cod x reader#valeria garza x you#cod
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âŠâ mdni , smut , afab!reader , bondage , mentions of blowjobs , breeding , mind break , feral nanami wanting a kid + fluff . i forgot priests couldn't get married unless they broke their vow , least to say i never really paid attention on sunday school unless it was to get candy đ§
PINNED PREQUEL PREVIOUSLY
it's the wedding night with priest!nanami, well now theological historian!nanami. his love and devotion for you was so strong that it made him take the decision to elope with you. break his clerical vow of celibacyâ as if he hadn't broken it already...countless times, and leave the town with you.
all for the sake of your future. you peered through the window of possibilities as nanami led you, with intertwined hands to the shared room at the hotel.
it would be in the afternoon when the kettle began to screech. the kids would be playing with a golden retriever puppy right outside in the backyard. spraying water from the hose at each other and the little dog. you couldn't help but break out a smile with the beautiful view as you poured the boiled water onto kento's favorite mug.
the sun rays would get transformed into color by the sun catchers, making your way to your husband's office a blast of colors. nanami took with grace the steaming treat you prepared him. even with some wrinkles and white streaks painting his hair, he is still as handsome as the day you met him.
"are the kids bothering you?" wrapping your arms around your husband, you see beyond the closed, wet window which also leads towards the backyard. the kids are still going berserk.
"i had to close the window because of those little rascals. but don't worry, i'm about to finish reviewing these homeworks."
"mmm, alright." your future seemed to be riddled with perpetual smiles and love. your husband takes your hands into his and leands in to kiss them before you begin to leave, "remember, we need to bathe the dog."
he sighs, quite defeated but chuckles soon after, "i can't hate that little devil."
"of course you can't, he's your twin!"
it was kento picking you up into his arms that fazed you out from your fantasy. it came out of nowhere, but he was gentle when elevating you up from the ground. you were his bride, now and forever. so how could he not hold you close to his body like one?
but this gentleness soon transmuted into a lust-driven frenzy. his cock was shiny and slick from your drool and combined juices, of which began to drip onto the mattress.
your arms wrapped around the back of the blond's neck, your tied hands, that held his dick while you suck on it, grasped onto his short hair. his hips helped thrust his cock deep and hard into you, as his tip began to kiss your g-spot and tingle your cervix entrance. leaving you counting stars with every blow he strikes.
"c'mon little dove, talk to me. how many babies you want?" he unlace the bindings that held you, and let your hands tease all around his flexing abs until they landed to your lower belly, "you're gonna look so pretty with my baby here, don't you think so, love?"
#âȘ đđđđđđđâ
đđđđđ â«#ê°áą. Ë .áąê±#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk smut#jjk x y/n#jjk x fem!reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#anime smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#anime fluff#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#kento nanami x you#nanami smut#jujutsu nanami#jjk nanami#nanami x fem!reader#nanami x y/n#nanami x you#nanami x reader#nanami scenarios#nanami drabbles#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento smut#kento smut#kento x y/n#kento x reader
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i'm not a fan of Taylor Swift not gonna lie but the way your work make me want to listen to the song in question is concerning...like omg i need to go through the lyrics because it was written with beauty and angst. its really doing something to me. i loved it, nini <33 (so much. ) đ„čâŒïž
your chest heaved as you felt rafe sliding in and out your walls, your arms gripping onto his back for support. he was relentless, soft grunts fill your ears. he takes your hands in his, intertwining fingers as the car moved with every thrust. he lets go for a second, brushing a stray piece of hair that moved onto your face, a soft smile placed on his lips. â you can't write smut and make me want to kms just after that....đđđ
he kissed down your neck and torso, kneading your breasts, sucking on your already hardened nipples. he moans, sending vibrations throughout your body. your hands find his hair, pulling on his dark blond locks. he whimpers, pushing his lips onto yours, taking you by surprise. â rafe's moaning âŒïžâŒïžâŒïžâŒïž
a moment of silence emerges from the both of you. ââŠiâm notâŠIâŠI forgave rafe. a long time ago, mom.â a shadow of a smile graces her face, âgood, thatâs good. iâll be seeing you more often thenââ âno, you donât understand, I justâŠme and rafeâŠI donât know if its just me, but, whenever I get out of this town, I feel soâŠfree from him. and then I come back home, something in the air shifts. it feels likeâŠI still belong to him. like heâs behind me, breathing down my neck. I feel trapped here.â she sighs, putting down her coffee mug on the table, wrapping her arms around you. âiâm sorry honey,â she takes another deep breath, âare you sure youâve really forgiven him?â âiâm not, thatâs the thing.â she nods, standing up. âI understand, take all the time you need to sort your feelings. I know youâre not telling me the whole story, so iâll wait until youâre ready.â she grabs her coffee mug, walking to her bedroom. you look down, seeing a tear drop melt into your hot chocolate. â I just took the whole paragraph because i adored the lines especially the one who started with â no you don't understand â | also I TRULY understand what reader's feel so it's even hard for me đđ
ârafe, it was a mistake, we shouldâveâŠI shouldâve never slept with you. I was so close, so close to escaping from youââ âthatâs too bad, y/n. you knew damn well what you were doing,â he bends his knees to your level, whispering in your ear, âand you liked it. I know you did. I know you missed feeling me in you.â your breath hitched, and he pulls away, pushing a stray hair out of your face, âand you liked when I did this to you, no?â he softly chuckles, âyeah, I havenât forgotten what you likedâŠhavenâtâŠstopped thinking about you at all, honestly.â â god, he's so toxic. and i like poison...
âiâll see you next year, yeah?â rafe says, turning around and getting in his car. â i hate it (just like I hate him). đđ But i feel like it's a realistic end so it's perfect
âtis the damn season - rafe cameron x reader
summary - hooking up with your hometown ex boyfriend shouldâve never happened, but it did.
warnings - smut, mdni, piv, car sex, angst, implications of a toxic relationship, not proofread, still not the best at smut i fear.
your chest heaved as you felt rafe sliding in and out your walls, your arms gripping onto his back for support. he was relentless, soft grunts fill your ears. he takes your hands in his, intertwining fingers as the car moved with every thrust. he lets go for a second, brushing a stray piece of hair that moved onto your face, a soft smile placed on his lips.
he kissed down your neck and torso, kneading your breasts, sucking on your already hardened nipples. he moans, sending vibrations throughout your body. your hands find his hair, pulling on his dark blond locks. he whimpers, pushing his lips onto yours, taking you by surprise.
he snakes his hand around your waist, maneuvering you to go on top of him. the moonlight hits his face just right; this mustâve been how he saw you earlier, eyes hooded, mouth slightly agape, and head tilted back.
your body felt colder from the air, but you felt so warm on the inside. you felt a pair of rough hands place themselves on your hips, guiding you to move up and down. âyou can do it, I know you can.â he praises, thrusting up to help you. he hits deep, and hard. you mewl, wanting him to do all the work. ââm not gonna let you go if you donât put in the effort, baby. câmon, âm almost there, I know you are too,â he rasps, gripping your hips roughly. you gulp, moving up and down feverishly. âthatâs it, doinâ so well for me, huh? letting me lay back, while I get to look at your pretty face. I know, I know, I can feel you tensinâ up, let go when you need to. iâm here, iâll always be here.â
that last sentence runs a shiver down your spine. before you know it, rafe is spilling inside you, providing you extra warmth. you collapse on his chest, sighing blissfully.
âyou should visit more often, not just come by during the holidays,â your mother softly speaks up, handing you a cup of hot chocolate. âI know, but you know why I canât.â you sigh, taking a small sip. ây/n, you canât still be hung up on him,â she sits down on the couch with you, âlisten, I know rafe doesnât really give you fond memories, but youâve gotta let go. you grew up here, this is your home. no matter where you go, I hope you always find your way back to us.â
a moment of silence emerges from the both of you. ââŠiâm notâŠIâŠI forgave rafe. a long time ago, mom.â a shadow of a smile graces her face, âgood, thatâs good. iâll be seeing you more often thenââ âno, you donât understand, I justâŠme and rafeâŠI donât know if its just me, but, whenever I get out of this town, I feel soâŠfree from him. and then I come back home, something in the air shifts. it feels likeâŠI still belong to him. like heâs behind me, breathing down my neck. I feel trapped here.â she sighs, putting down her coffee mug on the table, wrapping her arms around you. âiâm sorry honey,â she takes another deep breath, âare you sure youâve really forgiven him?â âiâm not, thatâs the thing.â she nods, standing up. âI understand, take all the time you need to sort your feelings. I know youâre not telling me the whole story, so iâll wait until youâre ready.â she grabs her coffee mug, walking to her bedroom. you look down, seeing a tear drop melt into your hot chocolate.
âare you really gonna do this to me?â rafeâs deep voice emerges from behind you. you turn around, and he has a slight smirk plastered on his smug face, a complete juxtaposition of what he looked like a couple nights back. you see your breath; and his too, not even when breathing you can get away from him. he owns every part of you.
ârafe, it was a mistake, we shouldâveâŠI shouldâve never slept with you. I was so close, so close to escaping from youââ âthatâs too bad, y/n. you knew damn well what you were doing,â he bends his knees to your level, whispering in your ear, âand you liked it. I know you did. I know you missed feeling me in you.â your breath hitched, and he pulls away, pushing a stray hair out of your face, âand you liked when I did this to you, no?â he softly chuckles, âyeah, I havenât forgotten what you likedâŠhavenâtâŠstopped thinking about you at all, honestly.â
âwell you shouldâ you try to sass back, but he just tsks, shaking his head, âwhy should I? you clearly havenât, otherwise you wouldnât have done what you did.â
âiâll see you next year, yeah?â rafe says, turning around and getting in his car.
taglist - @nemesyaaa @julie123456897 @mfdoomdickrider @grxnde-dwt @littlelamy @rafeeekam @xcinnamonmalfoyx
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe imagine#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#rafe drabble#rafe fluff#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe fic#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron fanfic#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron x yn#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x smut#rafe x female!mc#rafe x fem!reader#rafe#rafe x y/n
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Cherry Pie with Whip
á„«áĄdescription: Dean thinks there is not a single coherent thought behind those eyes, you prove him wrong ish Dean Winchester x Bimbo Fem! Reader á„«áĄa/n: I can't write the whole smut thing BUT I LOVE GIRLY POP READER SO MUCH ALSO LOVE THIS SONG SO VERY MUCH (Not Edited) á„«áĄsong inspo: Every Man Gets his wish - Lana Del Rey á„«áĄwarning: mentions of the devils tango
"Dean, I don't get it," you whined, your new glossy pink nails tapped against the table as you tilted your head, lips in a perfect pout. "Why does it have to be salt? Can't we just, like, use sugar or something? It's prettier."
Dean smirked, the corner of his mouth twitching as he stepped closer, his boots heavy against the floor. "Sweetheart, if sugar worked on ghosts, trust me, l'd be throwing cupcakes at 'em." His voice dripped with amusement, ânext time you can add glitter to the salt.â
You smiled up at him, your top hitched up as you reached over to place your hands around Deanâs neck. He squeezed you closer to him, pushing your bosoms up.
âHave I ever told you how much I love cherries,â he gazed into your eyes. The fresh coat of mascara and the shimmery eyeshadow made you look like a lost innocent baby doe.
âWe should go get cherry pie,â you smiled innocently, unaware of the tall older man starring down your shirt. Your cleavage on full display for his lust full eyes.
âI think I got something better here.â He smirked. âSomething bigger and juicier to fill me up.â
âOh yeah,â you smiled, âmaybe we can get some whip cream on top?â
âNow we are talking, got to keep my blood sugar in check.â He lifted you up, your legs wrapping around his waist which caused his shirt to ride up displaying his delicious v-line. Your clotthed cunt rubbing against his abdominal instinctively.
Dean groaned as his hands squeezed your heart shaped ass. You laced your fingers into his hair steadying yourself from floating away from the moment, Dean noticed the fog begin to form in your eyes. âI wonder sometimes if there is ever a coherent thought behind those y/e/c eyes.â
You softly pulled the ends of your boyfriendâs hair in response, âhey donât be mean,â you pouted.
âYou know what I mean princess,â Dean kissed up your neck towards the sensitive spot that he knew would make you weak. You moaned causing your chest to rise further up Deanâs face.
âwhere did you learn how to be such a tease?â Dean mumbled in your ear nibbling at the skin.
âwhat does that mean?â You asked.
Dean stopped his actions to view your face, trying to figure out if you were actually joking.
âHoney, do you not know what tease means?â He asked to which you shook your head.
âDo you know about sex?â You nodded.
âAre you sure?â Dean asked again, âI donât want to pressure you in anything sweetheart, you are in control.â
âI learned how to make love from the movies.â You blushed, hiding away from his gaze. Dean chuckled at your innocent response, before feeling guilty, had he known your level of knowledge on the topic he wouldnât have been so forward.
âAww sweetheart thatâs nothinâ be ashamed about,â you still avoided his gaze, âwhy donât you show me what you learned and I could help you outâŠwouldnât that be nice sweet cheeks.â Dean kissed up to your face, trying to pry your hands away from his face. âOf course with your consent and approval itâs all up to you.â You nodded, still a little embarrassed from your previous statement.
Dean smiled fondly at you, âI promise to make you feel so good youâll be seeing stars sugar.â
âReally?â You moved your hands away excitingly. âJust like in pretty woman?â You asked.
âEven better.â He pecked your lips. âJust say the words princess and Iâm on my knees.â
âYouâre so sweet Dean.â You blushed kissing his cheek. âHow can I ever repay you?â
âI got a few ways but first things first I got to take care of my baby girl.â
#dean winchester#fluff#supernatural#dean winchester x you#dean winchester/reader#spn#dean winchester x reader#smuttish#smut implied#dean winchester is HOT#dean winchester x fem reader#dean winchester x bimbo! reader#short cute imagine#pretty woman
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"Good Job Sweetheart"
pairings: bf!matt sturniolo x nerdy!reader
summary: matt decides to make his girlfriend feel good after she shows him she got an A+ on a test.
warnings: smut, blowjob f!receiving, nicknames (sweetheart, baby), fingering, praise kink, teasing, begging, reader is a bit shy and easy flustered, a little bit of overstimulation towards the end.
As you run through your boyfriend's house, completely oblivious to his two brothers watching tv in the living room, you speed past them and down the hallway towards your shared bedroom door. Your boyfriend's head shoots up at you excitedly pushing open the door and you run over jumping on top of him.
"I did it Matt! I aced the exam!" Matt furrows his eyebrows; his brain still hasn't caught up to speed. Instead, you push the exam paper in his hands, helping him figure it out. As his eyes scan over the page and the big letter A at the top of it a smile spreads on his face.
"Good job sweetheart, I knew you could do it." He sets down the paper on his side table and cups your face with both of his hands. He leans in giving you a passionate kiss in hopes of showing his approval. As he pulls back, he gives your now flushed face a once over, "So all that studying really paid off huh?"
You smile and nod your head as a response. You've been studying for endless nights trying to prepare for this exam, which your mind kept constantly telling you were gonna fail. Your boyfriend who knows how important school is to you, even tried to help you prepare. This consisted of you and Matt in the living room until 3 am reading post it cards until you soon fell asleep on his lap, completely exhausted.
You appreciated this about Matt. He knew how important this is to you, so he took time out of his day to help. He's never once complained about how much time you spend studying, if anything he just asks if you can do it in your shared bedroom so he can be near you.
"I'm so proud of you baby." Matt's words cause you to practically melt in his grasp. Matt knows all about how much you love receiving praise towards your accomplishments, especially from him. He finds it adorable how easily flustered and red you can get from it.
"Thank you." You smile once more at him before trying to get up off his lap, instead Matt's hands move to your hips and force you back down.
"How about I give you a reward for all your hard work?" He says it as a question.
"Like what?" Your obliviousness makes Matt smirk, and he leans towards you once again this time leaving small kisses along your neck. You gasp at the newfound sensation and subconsciously lean your head to the side to give him better access. Matt applies more pressure on his kisses, his hands roaming the sides of your body.
"You did so good on your test baby, you deserve to feel just as good." As his lips continue to attack your neck, your mind starts to become consumed by Matt and what he's doing. His hand wonders from your side down to your thigh, giving it a light squeeze. You feel a sense of need gather lower and lower, causing you to softly grind on Matt's growing bulge in his pants.
"We can't. It'll be too loud." Your words come out breathless as you keep grinding on Matt, nowhere close to stopping. Matt knows that you're talking about his brothers being close to the other side of the wall, and your record of screaming while Matt has his way with you.
"Then you'll have to be quiet, can you do that for me?" Matt pulls away and looks you dead in eye, you're hesitant for a few seconds and then nod your head. A huge part of you knows that you can't keep quiet with Matt, it's impossible. But he already feels so good you don't want to end here. "That's my girl." Matt gives you one more appreciative kiss before setting you flat against the bed. He gets up to walk over to the door, closing and locking it.
As he returns, he climbs over you nudging your legs open with his knee to give him room. His lips connect with yours again, the kiss filled with love and passion. Matt's knee comes up and pushes against your clit, making you moan into his mouth. He swallows up your noises and slips his tongue into you. His tongue dancing with yours, both of your saliva's mixing up and creating a mess. His hand tilts your head to the side allowing him a better angle.
When he finally pulls away, you're both gasping for air. "Arms up." You lift up your arms and feel the warmth of your shirt leave your body as Matt throws the clothing across the room. He kisses a trail from your neck down to your boobs, leaving small bites here and there. His one hand lifts up your lower body as his other hand slides below you and unclasps your bra, this also getting thrown.
Matt takes one of your nipples into his mouth and sucks, swirling his tongue around the nub. He rubs your other boob in an effort to give them the same attention. Once he feels satisfied with one nipple he moves on to the other one, doing the same with his mouth. Your hand finds its way into his hair and gives a small tug which brings Matt to moan against you.
He lets go of your nipple with a pop and starts kissing your body again, this time getting lower and lower. You squirm in anticipation and whine, desperately needing Matt to touch you there. "Easy baby, this is all about you. I promise to make you feel good."
His words lead to another whine escaping your throat, "Matt please."
"Please what baby?" His tone is teasing. He knows what you want, he just loves hearing you say it.
"You know what." You huff out. This makes Matt chuckle and start to slide your pants slowly down your legs, too slowly for your liking.
"No, I don't think I do. Let me hear you say it." After your pants are completely gone from your body, you spread your legs wider for him, hoping he'd get the hint. Your cheeks red from embarrassment. Instead of understanding, Matt just slides his hands up and down your thighs. Inching so close to where you need him then quickly retreating.
You feel tears start to prick your eyes as the need for him becomes too much. Your whole-body craving Matt. Needing him to touch you anywhere and everywhere. Your pussy leaking out more slick just thinking about him. That proven to be true when Matt notices a dark patch on your panties, his mouth watering at the sight. "Please touch me," You reach out for one of Matt's hands and place it on the wet spot, "here. I need you so bad. Please."
Your words go straight to Matt's cock causing it to throb in his pants. There's just something about listening to you beg for him. Your words are like honey to his ears. "There you go baby; you sound so good." He leans down and places kisses on your clit, the action making your hips rise towards his mouth. His lips getting wet from your need.
He grabs your panties and slides them down your body, dropping them onto the floor. He places a hand on your hip holding you firmly in place. "You gotta be quiet, okay?"
"I promise." The words leave your mouth in a hurry, hoping to get him to work faster. He kisses your clit again, this time without a layer of clothing to get in the way. The new feeling making you grip onto his hair again.
He slides his tongue down your folds and then back up. His saliva and tongue feeling blissful against your pussy. He moans at the taste of you and slips his tongue inside your hole, hoping to taste more. This catches you by surprise and a small moan leaves your throat, you see Matt raise his eyebrows at you, warning you to stay true to your promise.
He swirls his tongue around inside of you, once again moaning at the flavor of you, his noises getting muffled against you. You hear the small noise of Matt's tongue gliding in your juices and the sound of him slurping as much as he can up. He takes his tongue out and slides it back up your pussy before swirling around your clit.
His lips then attach to your clit and suck while his tongue swirls in a circle around it. You bite your bottom lip trying to silent your moans. Matt's hand squeezes your flesh on your thigh and then moves his hand to your pussy. His middle finger circles around your clit, teasing you. You try to raise your hips to get it inside of you, but Matt's hand doesn't let you budge.
After Matt feels he's teased you enough he enters his finger into you at a slow pace. You sigh in relief his fingers start moving back and forth at a good pace. The pleasure you've been searching for finally here. You start to feel a sudden need to hold on to something-anything. One of your hands grips onto Matt's hair while the other holds onto the sheets, knuckles turning white from how hard you're gripping. Matt moans again at feeling a tug on his strands of hair, the noise vibrating against your pussy making it flutter.
This spurs Matt on, him feeling your pussy throb and tighten against him. His finger increases its pace, your juices starting to drip down you and onto the sheets. The overwhelming pleasure raking up your body and getting stuck in your throat, your moans and whimpers desperately wanting to get out.
It doesn't help when Matt adds his ring finger, filling you up. Your walls clench around his fingers, your body getting closer and closer. You move your hand that was gripping the sheets towards your mouth and try to muffle your moans with your hand.
The core in your lower belly keeps tightening. "Matt, I'm gonna cum." The words sound muffled, but Matt knew what you said. You look down and see Matt's blue eyes staring right back at yours, this being his favorite view. Your clit throbs in Matt's mouth at the sight.
Matt's tongue starts swirling letters, his name. You feel the motion of his tongue form the letters M-A-T-T and then repeating. Your eyes roll back into your head as your legs tighten around Matt's head. "Come on baby, cum on my tongue." Matt's voice sending you over the edge.
You scream into your hand as the bubble finally explodes, your walls throbbing around Matt's fingers. He removes his fingers from inside you and brings them up towards your mouth. You take away your hand and suck around his digits, tasting the proof of your beautiful orgasm. Matt hums in satisfaction as his tongue reenters inside of you tasting your cum for himself.
Your hips jerk in oversensitivity as his tongue continues to wiggle around inside your walls. "Matt too much." You try to move away but his hand pulls you right back. He ignores your comment and shoves his fingers further down your mouth towards your throat, igniting a gag from you.
When he pulls his fingers out, they're covered in your salvia which is then returned inside of you when Matt lifts his head up. "Give me one more sweetheart, wanna make sure you feel as good as you should."
You go to protest, but Matt just dives back down to your pussy, leaving no room for arguing.
a/n: holy. I had all of this written out a week ago but the last couple sentences. It took me so long to finish this for what.
#fanfic#smut#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#bsf!matt#matt#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matt x reader#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo fanfic#the sturniolo triplets#sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo imagine#nerdy!reader#shy!reader#bf!matt#bf!matt sturniolo
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Second Lesson
Pairing:Â Steve Rogers x Reader
Word Count:Â 3.1k
Warnings:Â edging and overstimulation
Genre:Â smut
Summary:Â Some things are not self explanatory, and Steve has decided he's going to fill in the gaps by coming to you to ask his questions about sex and some of those questions have more involved answers than you'd expect
***
You hear a knock at your door while you're looking for something in your closet.
"Coming!" You call, taking a moment to contain the hurricane that you've created in there. You open the door to find Steve in the hall.
"Are you busy?" He asks.
"Not particularly, what's up?"
"I have another question."
"Shoot." You say, gesturing for him to walk into your room.
"Edging. What it is?"
"It is pleasuring yourself or someone else until the brink of orgasm without letting them actually have an orgasm."
"That sounds like torture." Steve frowns.
"Sometimes it is. It can be used as a punishment, some people enjoy it though, it can also be about increasing endurance- you know- training to last longer in bed, it also usually makes the orgasm more intense when you do eventually get to that point."
"Huh, have you done it before?"
"Been on both sides." You shrug. "Oh also I should mention that like most kink terms there is an equal yet opposite complementary term. For edging its complementary term is overstimulation."
"And that is?"
"If edging is about restraint when it comes to pleasure then overstimulation is a hedonistic indulgence in it. Orgasming again and again and again, sometimes to the point of pain this is where a safe word can be useful because you may say things like stop or I can't take it especially because post orgasm sensitivity can be a bitch but the whole point is to keep going and if you've already talked about exploring either edging or overstim, your partner will probably ignore you saying stop because again the point is to keep going even if you are sensitive, but if they're going to ignore you saying it's too much, you need to be able to stop them if it actually is too much."
"Are all aspects of sex so- severe?" He asks.
"No. Sex can be incredibly soft and gentle and sweet, it can be slow and tender in many ways. I mean, you saw some of that last time. You just- happen to have coincidentally questions about the other end of the spectrum today." You shrug.
"It just seems very, intense. Like maybe too intense? I don't get why you would want to put someone through that. It seems like a slippery slope, sex should be about love not some form of- torture."
"Well calm down, you sound panicked and it's not like I'm going to strap you down and force you to experience it. It's not for everyone Steve, different people have different preferences, this is why it's good to have those conversations before you sleep with someone so nobody gets put in a stressful situation they didn't sign up for. Plus there are a lot of ways to express love you know. If your person wants you to do these things then that absolutely shows that you love them, especially if you do them with the care you're meant to."
"I just don't understand it I guess." He shakes his head.
"That's fine Stevie, no one can force you to do it or enjoy it or even comprehend it really. Like I said, it's a personal preference. Just- be honest with your partner when the time comes." You shrug.
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Do you... like this stuff?" Steve asks.
"I do. With the right person."
"Really?"
"You have your ideas about sex, I have mine." You shrug.
"What's that mean?"
"You said sex is about showing love and I agree with that to a point but to me it's also about pleasure. It's about exploring yourself, sometimes through someone else. It's about learning and adventure. The heat and intensity, passion that is borderline all consuming, sex can be many things. I like to experience all of them."
"Oh." He breathes.
"Of course that's just me. I'm not here to change your mind about anything." You hum.
"I have to try this edging thing."
"You don't. The hands on lessons are an option not an obligation, you don't seem interested in that and that's fine! You can just take the verbal explanation and proceed with your day as long as it makes sense to you, there's no reason to force yourself to try something that don't appeal to you." You shake your head.
"Well, it's hard to understand something if you're not open to experiencing it right?"
"I mean, I guess sometimes."
"So I want to experience it. That way I can understand it." He insists.
"As long as you're sure about this."
"I'm sure. Let's do it." He nods.
"What? Now?"
"Do you have time?"
"Depends on what time it is now."
"Three seventeen."
"I've got til six, I have another engagement later this evening."
"Is that enough time?"
"Plenty. Get comfortable, I would recommend getting naked, you do need to at least take off your pants or you'll likely stain them but it'll probably be more comfortable to take off everything because there's a chance you'll get hot. I know you run pretty warm already but I don't know how much you'd enjoy your shirt sticking to your back after twenty minutes." You say.
"Right, yeah." Steve hesitantly shuffles out of his pants and underwear and then, after seemingly debating in his head, he also pulls his shirt over his head and places all of them on your desk chair before sitting on the bed.
"Alright, I'm going to treat this like I would a real situation. Of course, the expectations are different, I know so don't worry about performing a certain way. Just like last time if at any point you have a question or something makes you feel uncomfortable you can simply say so assuming you can focus. If you can't focus use your stoplight. Yellow, or red, just like we discussed before." You tell him as you pull open the drawer by your bed and grab the bottle of lube.
"What's that for?" Steve asks when you squirt a generous amount into your hand.
"It's a lubricant. It might be a little cold at first, but I'm sure you'll appreciate it, especially the longer this goes." You say sitting beside him. "I'm going to touch you now, is that alright?" You ask.
"Yes." Steve nods with more conviction than you'd expect. You wrap your fingers around the base of his dick and he takes in a large breath. His exhale is shaky as you drag your hand up his length with a pressured grip. You circle his tip, slowly massaging it, watching his reactions, enjoying the way his abdomen seems to flex sporadically. His breathing is coming out harsher now and you begin to pump him. Last time you made a point not to stare at him since he was clearly rather nervous about the whole thing but not looking is rather impossible with this 'lesson' so you take the time to really get a look at his dick as you stroke him. The tip is a reddish pink and there are a couple veins running very noticeably along it. You already knew he was big, he's been inside you for fuck's sake, but looking at it unobstructed, boy was he... endowed.
"So how this works Stevie, usually, is that you'll tell me when you're close, ask me, beg me if I tell you to, ask me to cum and I'll tell you if you've earned it. Of course I won't demand all that from you, I'm rather good at reading people's bodies." You explain to him, stroking faster, holding a little bit tighter.
"W-what do you mean usually?" He asks wearily.
"When I do this with partners. There's a bit of power play that comes with this, if you hadn't noticed, having control of how much pleasure your person receives at any given moment. It's a very powerful feeling. But this is more about teaching you than my own enjoyment, so it's a bit different, I'm just offering you more details about the appeal of it all." You explain.
"A-and you- you like that? The p-power play?" He asks. You can tell he's really starting to struggle with his focus, his body is twitching, and he's gripping the sheets, blinking rapidly as he speaks. You watch his whole body tense up and take that as your cue to ease up. You slow your wrist to almost a stop, relishing in the groan Steve lets out.
"I find it can be intoxicating." You smirk.
"So that's how this works?" He pants.
"Pretty much." You nod, picking up speed again. Steve moans as his body jolts again. You can't help but imagine how nice he'd look with a couple of hickeys. You won't be giving him any of course but the idea does captivate you for a brief moment. It's clear that Steve is trying to control his reactions, but the shaky breaths and strained grunts give him away.
"My god." He whispers, tipping his head back. If it was anybody but Steve saying those words, you'd affirm that you are their god and they should worship you as such but it's not somebody else, it's Steve and you'd best keep it simple. When his body tenses up again, you slow your hand accordingly, and Steve lets out a strained groan.
"You know Stevie, you don't have to try so hard to keep quiet. I like your little noises. They're hot." You say.
"I'm not- r-really used to... making n-noises like that." He pants out.
"Well, a bit of advice, most girls like to hear that you're enjoying yourself."
"Really?"
"Yep." You say, stroking him faster, again. You continue your game with him, slowing down when his body tenses up and speeding up when his shuddering breaths quiet. With each denied orgasm his restraint on his vocalizations seems to slip, by the fith time you're slowing down he's an unending string of moans and grunts and even a few whimpers when you squeeze in just the right place.
"This is torture." Steve grits out. His entire body is flushed and his skin is glistening.
"I know but you're doing so well. Just a little longer and I promise I'll reward you. Don't you want that?" You ask with a mocking sweetness in your tone.
"Please." He says breathlessly.
"Oh that sounded nice." You smile. You're not even trying to break him like you would under usual circumstances but the sound him whimpering please to you almost makes you want to.
"Y/n- I feel, like I'm on fire. Please I need to cum." Steve huffs through clenched teeth and you start to wonder if he's reaching his limit. Gripping his chin you gently tilt his head to look at you.
"Checking in Stevie, gimme a color please." You say softly.
"G-green, this is insane." He says shakily.
"You haven't tapped out yet." You smile slightly.
"Is that the goal?"
"Not today." You wink at him. You decide it's probably best to stop here, so you pick up your speed again watching for the telltale signs of his orgasm but this time you finally let him peak and you can't decide if the sound or sight is more dazzling. Either way, you work him through it as evidence of his release spurts over your hand and his thighs in thick ropes. There's an impressive amount of it and you wonder if this is a super soldier thing or if he's just really pent up. When nothing else comes out and he hisses against your touch you let him go. "I'm gonna get a wash cloth, hang tight." You tell him standing from the bed and walking into your bathroom. You rinse your hand first and then soak a washcloth with room temperature water. When you pop back out his arm is draped over his eyes but he otherwise hasn't moved. You start with his neck, wiping the sweat that's probably made his skin sticky. You do a quick swipe across his chest too before moving on to cleaning the remenants of his orgasm from his thighs and recovering dick. "How are we feeling?" You ask him once he's clean. You toss the washcloth in your hamper and grab a water from your mini fridge before sitting beside him on the bed.
"That was- intense." He says.
"Yes but you knew that going in."
"I mean- when you finally let me, you know. It was intense- probably more so than I've ever felt." He says and you giggle at his avoidance of saying orgasm.
"We should really work on your comfortablilty with some of these terms. But yes that intensity is a high some people crave."
"Wow."
"Was it worth it?" You ask.
"What?"
"You said it was the most intense orgasm you've ever had, would you say the payoff was worth the buildup? After all you called it torture."
"You're not even nice about it."
"I was actually very nice, I didn't wait til you were crying to get you off which- is usually what I'll do."
"You make people cry?" He blinks surprised.
"Sometimes." You shrug.
"That's- further than I-"
"I know, that's why I didn't make you cry. Although crying is way more likely with overstimultion anyhow." You shrug.
"Is it?"
"Wanna see for yourself?" You ask opening your bedside drawer again.
"Well I'm not sure I can hand-"
"Here." You drop one of your toys in his hand.
"What's this?"
"A vibrator. I figure it's not fair if every lesson is just me doing things to you like some sort of lab rat so I thought you might want to try overstimulating me. The only other way for that to happen is for you to learn my body but who has time for that? This is efficient and pretty much idiot proof it'll get the job done regardless of your personal experience." You shrug.
"You- want me to use this on you?" He asks wide eyes watching you quickly take off your clothes.
"Yes I do. It's simple, I promise. It does most of the work for you. If you have the energy for it that is." You say.
"Depends on just how simple it is." He says. You sit on the bed next to him and grab his wrist, placing the vibrator in his hand against your clit. It's not on but your insides still clench in anticipation when it touches you.
"Put it here, small circles or wiggling it up and down is fine but keep it in this general area, start with light pressure and press harder as we go. I'll be using the same stoplight system, so here's a couple of preliminary warnings, if I squirm away follow me or hold me down, if I cry that's fine, if I scream let me, ignore me if I ask you to stop or say it's too much. In fact, no matter what, you keep this against me until I call red and I will call red. Sound simple enough?"
"You might cry and that's a good thing?" He frowns.
"It's not a bad thing. It probably won't happen anyway I'm just covering my bases no need to look so terrified." You chuckle.
"How do I turn this on?" He asks after a moment.
"The last button."
"What are the other two?"
"One controls the rhythym and the other controls the power, don't mess with those buttons. For the sake of this lesson they are off limits."
"Last one turns it on?"
"Yes." You nod. Steve stares at the buttons for a moment before a sharp click fills the silence and you jolt from the sudden stimulation. He moves the toy in tight circles, his face pinched in focus. Your hips grind against the vibrator and it doesn't take long for your first orgasm to hit you with a soft moan.
"Oh." Steve says, as if he's surprised.
"Keep going, add pressure." You huff out. Shuddering pants indicate that Steve's done what you asked, your muscles tensing from the continued pleasure post orgasm. The thing with this particular vibrator is that it works quick and you hardly manage to calm down before your second orgasm sneaks up on you. Steve trades the circles for little up and down motions that draw a couple sharp moans from you.Â
"Are you okay?" He asks.
"Fine Stevie, I'm fine." You say shakily. Your third orgasm comes with a cry through your closed mouth. You know it's impractical to be so mindful of your sounds but you've got to remain at least semi-composed to be of any help to Steve. More and more your body spasms as the stimulation continues, practically twitching from the pleasure. Small whimpers begin to escape with more frequency as you quickly approach orgasm four. On this one your eyes roll back and you allow an obscene sounding high pitched moan to fall from your lips. Steve makes a sound somewhere in his throat which you barely hear. You're starting to feel that bite of overstimulation layering under the pleasure and it makes you squirm. You jerk against the toy, hoping for a reprieve from the buzzing and Steve, the dilligent student that he is, places a hand across your stomach, holding you in place and all you can do is cry out as he presses the vibrator firmly against your clit. You grip the sheets tightly as he starts to make little circles around your too sensitive bundle of nerves, your whole body is shaking as another orgasm quickly creeps up on you with a squealing noise and string of curses. You can feel your brain getting fuzzy, that familiar hedonistic haze threatens to blanket your thoughts, you know if you don't stop Steve soon you'll be far too blissed out to do so and Steve is not equipped to handle that sort of headspace.
"Okay, red. That's enough Stevie." You say breathlessly but firm. Steve quickly moves the toy but struggles to turn it off so you take it from him and turn it off yourself. You take a couple of moments to recompose yourself, ignoring the phantom buzzing and overwhelming wetness between your legs when you sit up and pull your knees to your chest.
"Are you alright? Do you need water? Can I get you something?"
"I'm fine Stevie. How are you feeling?"
"Me? I wasn't the one-"
"The whole point of this was to see if you enjoyed either edging or overstim- having tried both, do you feel like you at least have a better understanding of them like you wanted?"
"I- guess I have a better understanding."
"Well what're you thinking?"
"I thought I would- hate the edging thing but, as... intense as it was there was something, freeing about it? Like getting on a ride at Coney Island and the ending was, worth the build up."
"And overstimulation?"
"It's incredible watching the way your body reacts to such an onslaught. Plus the idea of bringing your lover imense pleasure like that is undeniably delicious, I can see how that kind of thing can be so thrilling."
"Well there you go. Questions answered. You're free to leave." You say.
"Are you sure you don't need anything?"
"I'm fine Steve I'm just going to hop in the shower you've got nothing to worry about really. I've got other things on my schedule of today remember?"
"Alright- if you're sure. I'll see you around. Enjoy your evening."
"Thanks. See ya." You say. Steve seems hesitant to leave but without a reason to stay, he has to shuffle his way out. You let out a sigh after your door closes. You've got a couple hours before your evening plans, good thing, you'll need it. Hopefully one of these days Steve will ask a simple question with a simple answer that doesn't a demonstration.
***
Tagged Users: @chososg1rl
#marvel#marvel fanfiction#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers#steve rogers fanfiction#steve rogers smut
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