#I REALLY ENJOYED RAMBLING ON ABOUT THIS
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so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.
and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.
...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.
see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.
while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.
especially if the president of the united states is on board.
yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.
and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."
but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.
...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.
not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.
yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.
but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire
#kai rambles#so like#i enjoy ships and learning about them and looking at them but like#i dont really care for warships#i dont hate them viscerally like i do cruise ships but i never really care for them#apart from the ones that were just like either ridiculously designed like the hms captain or the vasa or the novgorod#or the ones where just insane shit happened like with the william d porter#like this isnt even the extent of the porters unfortunate incidents like shr was sank by a kamikaze attack that MISSED#but somehow ended up below the ship and exploded and just like yeeted the porter out of the water#william d porter#uss william d porter#ww2#world war 2#world war ii#warships#again warships are really not my thing but god some of them are so fucking funny#uss iowa#fdr#franklin d. roosevelt#this suddenly got so many notes in like less than 24 hours what the fuck#shipposting
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ok someone please correct me if i'm wrong but am i weird for thinking those 'audiobooks don't count as reading' posts are ableist as fuck????
#ramble#my first thought was like: how is this even a debate what about blind people. not every book comes in braille but MOST have an audiobook#or dyslexic people#you still enjoyed the book!! you still absorbed it!!! you got EXACTLY the same thing as people who read the words!!!#how does it not count????#i guess you miss out on the 'learning new vocab' you get through seeing the words but also#i don't really do audiobooks but i do a lot of podcasts esp fiction podcasts#and i have ABSOLUTELY picked up new stuff from there that helps with my writing#someone please explain how this is even an argument of COURSE it counts????#idk in my opinion finishing a book means 'i put the words in my brain and i thought about them and i enjoyed a story'#not 'i held a stack of paper in my hands for a bit'#i'm v lucky that i do have time to sit and read. and whenever i commute anywhere it's public transport so i CAN bring a book with me#but if i didn't have the free time or had to drive for hours everywhere i would be STOKED to still get to enjoy books#it's been REALLY bothering me lmao idk why i feel so strongly#for some reason it's giving the same energy as like. being told you can't take a comic or manga from the library bc it's not a 'real' book#of course it's a real book it's a story somebody wrote down#i can see this spiralling into 'if you have a kindle you aren't reading'. you have to sniff the paper. feel the papercuts
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forever obsessed with dynamics between vampires, specifically that of a maker and fledgling, as a way to explore abuse. the creation of a vampire itself can so easily be a literalization of the lasting impacts of trauma and also much more simply the ways a perpetrator might shape their victim’s very identity. the extremes of isolation in the way that the new vampire, in most narratives, must cut all ties to their mortal life, or else go through an elaborate charade to maintain the facade of humanity, while forever still being removed from it. and the sheer dependence and vulnerability of being in an entirely new state of being, wholly uncertain of what it entails, and relying on another person to define… everything.
#or just the moral dilemmas#rewatching amc interview is kind of making me insane#that moment in episode two when louis is looking for a sort of assurance in the fact that lestat may actually have some good in him#look at how he cares about music look at the simple wondrous things that can bring him joy#and then the immediate dread when the opera performance turns out to be imperfect because he knows how lestat will react to *that*#I think there’s also something really interesting in the highlighting of lestat upbraids the less skilled singer before killing him#(slowly)#but also I will wait to watch more before I articulate my thoughts#vampires#interview with the vampire#amc interview with the vampire#i ramble sometimes#I do still find the lestat and claudia film and novel dynamic by far the most compelling for how she tries to usurp him but almost to be him#but I’m enjoying this#I’m very curious if I will like show claudia more on rewatch#the movie always resonated most with me (sue me lol) because there seemed to be more simultaneous fondness and attachment even at the end
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to my IRL(s) who keeps sending me disco elysium memes despite the fact i haven't played it in months THIS IS BECAUSE OF YOU. HELP ME. If people have ideas on this AU feel free to have fun with it considering I. have only a few!
#zombiecleo#ethoslab#hermitcraft#scopophobia cw#hermitcraft AU#tag ramble time!#don't. worry about the text. yes it's trying to imply that etho can see us and break the fourth wall Don't Worry About It#this AU really was 'i wanna draw hermits in DE outfits who's pathetic and sad enough to b– yeah it's etho.'#'that makes cleo Kim then. I think they'd make it work' and that was it#in my heart it's also an AT so they're working a different case somewhere else in universe. mostly because i don't think them and-#-cuno/cunoesse should exist at the same time.. etho can have a drug addiction but cleo is NOT getting called a faggot /lh#Cleo getting written as 'just cleo' in text is kinda silly i enjoy it. hopefully that wasn't used in the actual game and i forgot about it#art out the oven#art wise this was really fun i locked myself in values jail but the colours turned out reasonable anyway which is always nice#yes cleo has gauges and an undercut <3#[scheduled]#EDIT: oh god. i have to add a tag for this AU#Disco Hermits AU
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Who's the "real" me?
+ some references for the Rise-related things I included <3
#im reaaaally happy with this one hehe i had fun putting the stuff from different things shes had/worn#i feel like ppl overlook the massive identity crisis & the accompanying depression & internal conflict rise is going through during the gam#like shes trying to figure out who she is seperate from her idol image (which she constantly still clings to despite her insistance that sh#s done with it bc she does still crave that recognition and attention she got from that position. she literally breaks down crying when her#manager tells her kanami has taken her acting role and is more-or-less set to take her spot now)#and then she also struggles with finding what she wants to do with herself now that she doesnt have showbiz to worry about#i think she kinda unintentionally uses the investigation as an anchor for her to hold onto#something to keep her busy in the absence of the hustling idol life#and then she also like. again she keeps clinging to the idol image and the associated bubbly-ness and bold flirtation#because thats the ''her'' ppl liked#i dont think the way she acts during the game is ENTIRELY an act theres definitely a lot of her true self in it too#but she does have a lot of moments where she leans more heavily into the bubbly & flirty cutie act#her sl shows that for all that she wanted to retire from showbiz she isnt really ready just yet#bc she did actually enjoy being an idol. she did enjoy being able to reach out to people in this way & to finally have ppl like & accept he#the problem is she doesnt know who ''she'' is at this point#im rambling but u get my point. yeah. yeah#rise..............#rise kujikawa#persona#persona 4#p4#art#my art#xanders art#digital art#fan art
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i feel like poolverine easily could’ve been one of those “they’re flirty but it’s mostly unserious” situations, and for most of the movie yeah they were extremely gay, but wade’s been like that with other guys and it was never treated as a serious type of relationship before. they’re willing to die for each other, but even then the romantic aspect of their relationship could be glossed over because it’s a superhero movie, that’s just what they do, and they’re working together to save a whole timeline—it’s not just about them. but then the movie doesn’t end with them saving the day and moving on. i think this’s really the part that sells poolverine as a genuine relationship to me… logan’s leaving, and wade calls for him. he can’t stand to let him go. then he introduces him to his family, and logan stays. he doesn’t really need to stay, but they’ve both decided they’re better off with one another than without
#don’t get me wrong#wade and vanessa are going to end up back together again if there’s ever another deadpool movie#and then he’ll lose her again for whatever reason#because that’s just how it goes#ignore the fact that logan tells wade to talk to vanessa and i’d be convinced that the ending was supposed to imply them being canon tbh#not gonna delude myself into believing poolverine will ever be genuinely and seriously canon#but shippingwise#i think this’s why i’ve latched onto poolverine despite some of the similarities between cable & logan#with cable it was never gonna be serious#despite it being fun to ship them and enjoy their dynamic#but#with logan… storywise… it makes so much sense for them to be endgame#they both were at terrible points in their lives and really needed each other#not just to fix each other’s problems. but they needed someone who was so on their own level that they could fix each other#not in a healthy way. but#yknow#anyway#idk i’m kinda rambling about nothing here#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wolverine#wade wilson#logan#um#logan howlett#<- ….i guess#poolverine#deadclaws
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#spiderman#deadpool#spideypool#comic#I did this for a class#an ENGLISH class#but we're learning about comics as literature and for the most recent paper we had an option to make a comic#and the main theme we're studying this semester is power so i made this#anyway I forgot how goddamn hard these two are to draw#I hate how complicated their costumes are like its so unnecessary#but I also think this is the most accurately I've drawn them#and they looked consistent through this whole thing#so I'm really proud of myself#and yes this is gay but i'm imagining that in this scene they don't realize they have feelings for each other yet hee hee#some of these were fuckin hard angles too what was i doing to myself!!! this was hard af!!! wtf!!!#and to be honest i drew all of this yesterday and today!!! that was so much drawing!!! og my god!!!#but it was fun he he#except i will always hate the webs on spideys costume. hell world#they have to look such a specific way and it is not easy#enough rambling. enjoy#also sorry im reuploading this because i had accidentally colored in one of spideys speech bubbles as yellow
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pairing: hoshina soushirou x gn!reader (no prns)
summary: he still dreams of you and wishes for another chance to make you his, some lines are inspired by hakujitsu by king gnu
warnings: reader is rather lively/bubbly,
notes: TYSM FOR 100 !!!, a/n (yapping) in tags
wc: 1800
Hoshina Soushirou still dreamt of you. Every once in a while, you’d come to visit him in his sleep and it would make him believe that a miracle had occurred, that he had another chance. Every time, he would tell himself that he would never let this go, that he would give it his absolute all this time.
Yet, every time, he would wake up from this dream.
And every time, he would feel his heart drop at the realization of that. He was disappointed, and he knew, but there was no reason to be. It wasn't like anything had happened between the two of you. He liked to believe there was something going on— something more than mere acquaintances or friends, but he knew there wasn't. It must've been all in his head because the last time he had heard of you was before you were moved to the first division. He hadn't heard a single word from you since then, nor has he said anything— but that was just the way it was. There was nothing to do at this point anyway.
He wasn’t with you for all that long, and it was probably just the fact that both of you joined at the same time that naturally started the first conversation. He was far more weary of everything and far less cheerful at the time, and you didn't even work with him most of the time being a researcher, but you didn’t mind that one bit. If you had something you wanted to say, you would tell him and he’d just have to listen. At first, he had no idea why you kept talking to him when he paid hardly any mind, but after a while, he found comfort in your conversations. He had started to look forward to talking to you.
It had only been a few months before the defense force noticed how spectacular your work was and quickly called you over to the first division. There wasn’t a tearful farewell, or even a casual goodbye for that matter. You disappeared along with a cheerful ‘I’ll see you around!’ while you were moving your boxes out and he would hear those words ring in his head for the years to come— in your voice. Yet, at the time, all he could do was force a smile and nod.
It had been so many years since you had moved, he didn’t even know what you looked like now. Probably still stunning. Definitely still stunning. Although he had the chance to see the 1st division officers a lot, you were a researcher who worked behind the scenes. Naturally, there was no reason he'd bump into you, and he didn’t. He never did.
He loved to remember you, but he hated to think about you. He loved to remember the way you would laugh at his silly jokes, the way you would ramble on about the work you had to do daily but would still put in your all, and the way you would always visit him with some cold tea when he trained late into the night if you were still up as well. Actually, he hated thinking about the tea— it would make him start thinking about you. He would think about how you were now, if you were still pilled with work, and if you remembered him.
If he bumped into you, would you remember his name? Maybe if he cracked a lame joke. Maybe if he gave you a few days to think about it. Maybe if he started listing the things you talked about— his most treasured memories. Maybe then you’d say his name again.
See? This is why he hated thinking about you— he had things to be doing.
It wasn't like this happened everyday and it wasn't that big of a deal. It just ruined his day a little when it did happen. So if he had to say, he hated dreaming of you.
As you took over his thoughts again, the emergency alarm started to buzz, as if to tell him to snap out of it. He was thankful, he couldn't still be daydreaming like this.
A smaller-sized identified grade kaiju had appeared near the first division quarters, so the third division was doing more backup work this time. Hoshina was taking care of the smaller kaiju in the vicinity that had spawned from the presence of the honju. It felt nice for him to be doing work, it took his mind off his ramblings and cleared his head. He wasn't too worried about the honju, however. Although it was an identified grade, it wasn't anything they hadn't dealt with before and as much as he liked to tease Narumi about how he was always better at smaller kaiju neutralization, he knew Narumi was extraordinary at what he did.
At least that would have been true for any other kaiju of that size and strength, but Narumi seemed to be struggling far more than expected with this one. From his earpiece, he heard Okonogi notify him that the 1st division was asking to send Narumi some help if possible, and he immediately rushed over.
Yet, by the time he got there, Narumi had already neutralized the kaiju in question, although horribly beat up.
“I don't need your help, Hoshina!” Narumi still managed to yell while on the floor, absolutely bleeding out.
“Oh, shut up, do you want to die?” Hoshina asked. It didn't take an expert to see that Narumi’s condition was concerning.
Narumi soon fell quiet, probably unconscious, while Hoshina found his earpiece lying on the floor near him. He picked it up, hoping it'd connect to the first division just in case they had lost connection to his vitals.
“He's unconscious right now, but he seems to still be breathing. However, he's bleeding dangerously from multiple spots. I think a few ribs might also be broken,” Hoshina said. “There aren't any kaiju nearby at the moment and I'll take care of them if any do come— bring the stretcher right away.”
He waited a moment, but there was no response from the earpiece.
“Hello?” he asked, hoping for a response. After another moment, he heard it.
“Hoshina…?”
It was you. He would still recognize your voice from anywhere. Oh, how he missed you. His eyes were wide and he had nothing to say all of a sudden. You remembered him. You recognized his voice.
You remembered his name.
“Thank you for your report, we lost connection to some of his vitals halfway through. The medics should be there in a few minutes,” you said.
“I'll stand by,” Hoshina said and kept Narumi's earpiece in his ear. He had nothing he wanted to tell you, not one thing in mind, but he wanted to be on the line with you— even in silence. The medics came in a few minutes like you had told him and took care of Narumi right away.
“They got here, he should be fine now,” Hoshina said, as if you didn't already know. He just wanted something to say to you.
“I missed working with you,” you said and he couldn't believe his ears. Perhaps he'd wake up from this dream again. Perhaps he'd open his eyes and be utterly disappointed again. But he knew there wasn't even a hint of romantic affection in your words, just the respect you've always had for the work he did, and how you missed doing this job with him. And he did too.
“Yeah, I did too,” he said. “I still do.”
You chuckled a little and he could still picture you smiling. “That made my entire year,” you said. “Probably not the time for this, but we should catch up sometime. If you don't mind, of course.”
Made your year. What did you mean by that? And If he didn't mind? Oh, you didn't know how many times he's dreamed of this day.
“I'd love to,” he said. While he was a little embarrassed to imagine the rest of the first-division team hearing this conversation, that was not going to stop him. He'd be an absolute fool to let this chance go. He has promised himself to give it his all this time.
“Are you seeing anyone?” he asked quietly.
“Sorry?” you asked, hoping he'd repeat that. You heard it, but you were afraid you were so delusional you were starting to hear things. Your heartbeat quickened and you waited patiently, hoping it wasn't all in your head.
“Do you have a lover?” he asked a little more clearly, but obviously still nervous and flustered. You had never seen him like this, ever.
“No,” you replied, a little too quickly. “I do not.”
Relief washed over him and he felt his heartbeat quicken. Oh, thank goodness you didn't have access to his vitals. He was going to make you fall for him somehow.
“…do you?” you asked quietly, after a moment.
“Me?” he asked. “No, I don't.”
“I see,” you said, but he could hear the soft delight in your voice. He would never miss it.
Perhaps he'd just go for it. There was nothing for him to lose at this point, and he had made his feelings plenty obvious already. If you didn't want him, he'd just try again. He's tried countless times in his dreams already, what's a few more?
“But I'd love to be yours,” he said and heard you gasp quietly. That one he couldn't read. Was that a little too bold? Far too sudden?
“Did I hear that right?” he faintly heard you scream, asking your fellow first division coworkers. That made him laugh, you hadn't changed one bit. “I’ve loved you forever, Hoshina.”
There was absolutely no way. He was going to wake up soon, he just knew it. Well, might as well indulge in the dream for now, then.
“I've definitely loved you for longer,” he said.
“Hoshina, I'm going to kill you if this is a dream,” you said, and that caught him off guard. Yet, even that sounded nice to him, and that made him smile. He'd get to see you, at least.
But it wasn't a dream. The way your voice fluttered his heart could never be felt through a dream. The way your laugh filled his soul could not possibly make him feel so warm through a mere dream.
“I cannot wait to see you,” you said softly, your voice so full of love it made him melt.
He couldn't either, but that wasn't exactly what he had on mind this entire time.
“And I cannot wait to kiss you.”
#hoshina x reader#hoshina soshiro x reader#soshiro x reader#hoshina soshiro#hoshina#kaiju no. 8 x reader#kaiju no 8 x reader#kn8 x reader#HERE IT IS#okay i really enjoyed writing this though i must be honest#i hope you enjoyed reading#THANK U SM FOR READING#truly did not mean to ramble on for this long#I ACTUALLY LIKED THIS ONE QUITE A BIT like the setting of it i might write a continuation sometime i will see#i usually always write drabbles but i start writing for hoshina and it will always hit 1k words#i truly cannot tell if the dialogue is actually sweet or i get second hand embarrassment reading it (STRONGLY LEANING TOWARDS THE LATTER)#so i will not think about that.#however i love the though of hoshina hopelessly in love for years#will always always melt my heart#stop he is SUCH A LOSERRRRRR#PEOPLE ARE LISTENING WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN PUBLIC#absolutely absolutely adore this man happy hoshina episode
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a quick cheat sheet because @meso-mijali was preparing to kill me over the fact that one character's acronym is SQQ and the other's is SQH
#for anyone else that might enjoy this and for meso to reference the next time i'm rambling and she wants to strangle me#done in all of 30secs on a layer of a completely different picture#svsss#doodles#i'm part way through book 3 so these just happen to be the characters i'm talking about the most right now#if i included anymore than this she really would hunt me for sport#meso i love and appreciate the fact that you've tolerated me getting into three separate series with increasingly obscure acronym names
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Going to break into your house with pots and pans and yell at you until you reframe your thinking of productivity to include more than just schoolwork or a salary or chores and the like.
Did you do a thing? Was there a positive result for you or someone else?
Congratulations, you did a Productivity!!!
You aren’t ALWAYS going to be able to have the energy to do what we consider traditionally productive. You won’t always have the motivation.
Yeah, maybe you could have spent two hours studying for that test instead of 15 minutes. Maybe you could have cleaned the kitchen instead of the dishes. And? That’s still something!
Productivity is doing things!! Did you eat food and drink water? You did something that helped your body work! Doodled in class? You made art! Even just posting theories and memes on tumblr dot com is a thing! You thought out the post, figured out how to organize it (even if you don’t realize you did that) and you made it! And now other people can see and you DID something and you should be proud!!!
Be proud of yourself or I am going to show up outside your window tonight and scream positive affirmations louder than a cat who has just discovered her food bowl is empty.
#ESPECIALLY if you are disabled or mentally ill or sick or neurodivergent or any of the like#For me with ADHD and oftentimes poor mental health I really struggle to be traditionally “productive”#And earlier today I was frustrated because I was having a difficult time finishing a school assignment.#But also?#I noticed and made a post about a parallel between comic panels.#I’m working on a long post analyzing specific quotes from Webtoon.#I got up and got a water bottle.#Is that not productive?#Does that not produce a result that I and others may enjoy?#y’all have GOT to acknowledge little victories because that took effort and THAT was productive and Im sosososososososososo proud of you!!#adhd#autism#neurodivergent#i dont know what all to tag this as so feel free to reblog with any tags you feel this applies to or apply to you in relation to this!!#productive#disability#actually autistic#actually adhd#rambles
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can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest
like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!
#me.txt#jjba#i'm going to ramble in tags actually. excuse me#ok. rereading sdc and so confused at the general perception of jotaro and his friends/family. he's not NEARLY as flat or as dickish#i understand that the anime (particularly the dub) tends to slander him but even then he still clearly cares for them! i'm confused#i also understand that a lot of people dig against jotaro and kakyoin as a dynamic because 'they're popular' and that generally disliking#popular things across media is a thing that i've seen consistently everywhere but the discredit to them simply as a DUO and not even as a#pairing is so..... odd..... like they're considered to be a duo that clicks for a reason. i enjoyed them even before i got into the fandom#every time i see someone say jotaro is overrated/dull i take a shot and assume they're an anime-only or only read the manga like once btw#joseph and jotaro also have a neat dynamic and they obviously both love and care for each other. like they're not going to go around loudly#or anything but literally the entirety of the lovers and the prelude to the dio fight IS jotaro being worked up over joseph getting hurt#equally i don't know if it translates to the anime as much but joseph is VERY complimentary when it comes to jotaro. like he sings his#praises so often and reminds everyone that he's his grandson so frequently (d'arby the gamer is a good example of this). either way it's so#peculiar....... there's not enough avdol and jotaro content btw (also in canon) because jotaro obviously looks up to him and avdol jokes#around with him on the occasion they interact after their intro which doesn't start very well. it's very cute#i do think an important thing to note about jotaro's character is how he acts AFTER his intro because he's so drastically different. early#jotaro and later jotaro aren't the same character and i do not mean this in a character development way. excluding the jail incident he's#completely different and probably shouldn't really be taken into account (especially considering the amount of slapstick in araki's intros)#and i think that's really???? what people center on for his character? Which sucks balls bad!#anyways. i could ramble more about this if asked i have so much to say but sigh. jotaro cares so much for his friends and family he's not a#flat fully cold asshole character regardless of whether you watch the anime or ova or read the manga. you just have poor media literacy#i wouldn't recommend watching solely the anime for his character though. the dub also changes a lot so it's... questionable#i love the anime and it's still important for him though. also adds neat stuff. i need to stop myself. i have many thoughts on the matter#jotaro kujo#joseph joestar#noriaki kakyoin#adding in case anyone sees: i am not saying that he is perfect about this. in fact he is very ass about it with jolyne and holly and that's#very important. he also is in fact an asshole sometimes. NOT as much as you guys are making him though!#please don't get me started on how much of a dick etc people make kakyoin to veer away from the 'woobified' characterizations of him#in fact i think that's bad if not worse because it CLAIMS to be in character. hes a prim asshole at times but not that angry or dishevelled
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simblr mutuals i think you guys should indulge in more games (lovingly)
#*fizzyspeaks#i mean this in a way like post other games or talk about other games. i'd love to hear your opinion on them or just plain ramble about why#you enjoy it or not#obv you can run your blog however you want. i'd love it regardless#edit: i mentioned this in a most clarifying what i meant -#-but this post was made really with my mutuals in mind. i didn’t expect this to leave my sphere#i enjoy seeing my mutuals talk about other games they enjoy#this wasn’t supposed to come off as a “simmers arent real gamers” take. i don’t mean that
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fast sketch of ominis & fast intro to the ominis longfic I'm working on!! This is going to be the most self-indulgent pride and prejudice ripoff that ever existed, 100% based on the ominis of my oneshot💘
I am just OBSESSED with exploring the idea that he’s a natural legilimens & OBSESSED with the thought that he thinks too much for his own good🫶🫶🫶
Ominis Gaunt has always suspected he is cold-blooded.
It makes sense, really.
He always seems to be cold: frigid, long fingers that are often stiff and difficult to move; goosebumps raising the skin of his arms and the back of his neck any time he walks through the drafty halls of the dungeons; even his eyes, he has been told, are reminiscent of ice. They are apparently quite unsettling. The only time he feels comfortable in his body is when he basks in the heat of the sun.
His earliest memory is of the cold. It went like this: he was four years old: his older brother, Marvolo, had led him outside as a joke, he swore up and down that it was just a small joke, and how was he supposed to know that poor, blind Ominis would not be able to find his way back home? When his parents had finally found him, his frail mother sobbing and holding his tiny, blue, hypothermic body to her chest, Ominis remembers feeling quite perturbed at the disturbance. Couldn’t he just be left alone, in the silent soft snow?
He does not know if he has ever felt warm since.
As he strides through the dungeons, the copious amount of warming charms he casts on himself do not seem to be enough, but he keeps casting them anyways and also: wrapping his wool scarf more tightly around his neck, quickening his pace in the hopes that blood flows more easily through his limbs, wishing that he had remembered his gloves. Winter is always a terrible time of year (this winter more terrible than usual), and every breath of warm air leaves his lips reluctantly. How he wishes that he could just hold on to it a bit longer and yet the warmth leaves him precisely fifteen traitorous times a minute, the frigid air gleefully entering and burning its way down his throat in response. Maybe it’s a punishment of some sort.
His whole life has been defined by punishments and sometimes he preoccupies himself with the thought that it is the only way he can view the world. Most of the punishments are manifested in curses inherited from his family. (His parents and Marvolo insist that they are gifts, but Ominis begs to differ.)
First, his blindness: the only true punishment-curse that even his family rejects: caused by inbreeding, no doubt. He did not cry after his birth and his mother cradled his tiny body in silent arms, lovingly whispering nonsense-evil-Parseltongue to him but when he opened his eyes and she saw a brilliant celestine blue with no iris, she screamed in horror and shattered the frigid peace of the room. His parents tried everything to fix him, make him whole, throwing money at various possible solutions to no avail. Magically induced disabilities are not, apparently, curable by magic.
Ominis is not sure that he hates being blind, although he suspects everyone thinks that he should. It is as much a part of him as his fifteen-breaths-per-minute, and he thinks that vision is not all it’s cracked up to be. He is always terrified at the thought that his tenuous hold on sanity is only due to the fact that he cannot see, until he realizes he shouldn’t be terrified of hypothetical situations that cannot come to pass. He consoles himself with the thought that maybe, if he has had to give up his vision for his sanity, it is a small price to pay. Although, he also thinks sometimes that it would be nice to live a life without any morality holding him back.
He is entirely too introspective, after all.
It is precisely this introspection that is his downfall in this moment (and his cold blood). Ominis is so busy casting warming charms on himself and thinking in circles that he cannot use his wand to help him sense his environment and so he should not be surprised when he crashes into her.
And yet he is. Terribly surprised.
Maybe if he were not so caught up in his own thoughts he could have paid more attention to his surroundings. Instead, he spent too much time ruminating on his reptilian heritage and has now barreled head first into his arch-nemesis.
Rosalie Harris.
The girl who has stolen his oldest friend from him.
The girl who is currently making angry noises as she clambers to her feet and is picking up the things that he has crashed everywhere. Even if he could see, Ominis is not sure he would help her. Helping her would be akin to betraying himself, after all.
“Hey! Watch where you’re - oh, hello, Ominis.”
“Rosalie,” he says shortly, nodding his head where he thinks she might be standing and stepping to the side. He tightens his grip around his wand, feeling the texture of the wood change from rough to smooth as he runs his thumb down it. Smooth where he always seems to worry it, rough where the wood refuses to yield to the brushes of his thumb.
He surreptitiously casts the spell - he has at least done it so many times he no longer needs to say it out loud - and his surroundings light up. Or, he supposes that is the most apt description, considering he cannot actually differentiate between light and dark. He senses Rosalie’s silhouette to his left - she is standing with her arms crossed and her foot taps impatiently as she waits for him.
Waiting for what? he thinks, slightly irritated. She never seems to leave him alone and he wracks his brain trying to think of something, anything he can say to get rid of her.
Maybe if he speaks in Parseltongue, she would finally be scared away for good. He does not really want that second reminder of his family’s curse, though.
His family preferred speaking in Parseltongue with each other, believing the ability made them morally superior to everyone else and Ominis had not even realized until he had arrived at Hogwarts that no, it was not normal. When his name had been called at the Sorting, furious whispers had erupted amongst all the students, and his every step (terrified, confused, unsure - he had still been getting used to using his wand to navigate his surroundings) to the stool at the front of the Great Hall was plagued with a susurration reminiscent of snakes. Except these whispers, sneaking their way into his mind, had been unkind and overwhelming.
(He had not realized in that moment that he was also hearing their thoughts.)
Maybe now, with Rosalie standing in front of him and just annoyingly waiting for Merlin-knows-what, Ominis should use his Legilimency to find out what Rosalie wants. (He hates it, though.) It would not be difficult. (The thought makes him shiver in horror because he doesn’t want to abuse the ability.) He can feel the edges of her mind, her magic, and all he has to do is reach out - she is right there, and -
“Ominis?”
Her arms are crossed, he hears an impatient huff.
Why hasn’t she left him alone yet?
Hadn’t the Hogwarts Express already left the station, bringing all of the students home for the winter holiday? Ominis had thought he would be one of the only students left in the castle, and if he is being honest with himself, he had been looking quite forward to having the place to himself.
Ominis’s winter has just gotten infinitely worse.
Going to Gaunt Manor for the holidays is out of the question (he will not think about the nightmares that have been plaguing him ever since he received the owl demanding he go home), and Ominis does not want to be more of a burden to the Sallows. They already do enough for him over the summer, and Sebastian and Anne have convinced him to go to Hogsmeade with them at least twice over the next two weeks. Besides, with Anne’s curse progressing, Ominis does not want to be in the way.
“Why are you still here?” Ominis asks. He knows his voice comes across as cold as his blood, blunt, but he cannot help himself. Ever since Rosalie arrived - her entrance to Hogwarts also causing quite the stir - Ominis has been intensely annoyed by her presence. She is too happy. Too carefree. Too…well, everything he is not.
And, she does not seem to leave him alone.
Rosalie is always there, always hanging around Sebastian. (Taking Sebastian away.) He even showed her the Undercroft, which had almost caused a rift in their relationship. Ominis could not believe that Sebastian would be so careless, showing someone who for all intents and purposes is crashing her way into their lives, forcing them to pay attention to her. They barely even knew her, and yet Sebastian thought it was a good idea to show her such a sacred place?
(It does not help that she is intelligent, and Ominis has caught himself on more than one occasion about to ask her about her opinion on something before he catches himself.)
“I was looking for you.”
Ominis tilts his head at that and fiddles with his ring. He considers walking away, leaving -
“I mean…Sebastian said that you were also going to be here over the holidays and since everyone else just left I thought -”
“Thought what?” Internally, Ominis winces at the biting tone to his voice. It came out harsher than he intended, his voice loud and echoing through his mind, bouncing off the cold, stone walls surrounding them.
#the girl’s name and gender tbh is subject to change#I’m having a lot of fun writing this up but it was all just written up on a whim#idk when I’ll FULLY be able to commit to this#but I always have so much fun writing his POV#SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY!!! & forgive the messy sketch😆#honestly most of this is subject to be edited and/or changed#bc you are getting my writing before any editing whatsoever here😳#I just love the idea of Ominis being so full of conflicting pride and shame and lots of confusion#and the love interest to be so annoying and bratty and headstrong#basically an Elizabeth Bennet you know…she always thinks she’s right (she isn’t) and her first impressions are the law#I’m actually reading Mansfield Park now…Jane Austen please bless me as I write tonight😌🙏#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#ominis gaunt fanfiction#ominis#ominis x mc#hogwarts legacy ominis#ominis gaunt#ominis gaunt fanart#also I have WAY MORE WRITTEN!!! mostly just unconnected ramblings from his pov about how he thinks about life#& snapshots of his first year at Hogwarts 🥺🥺🥺#I really am an Ominis girl…#hogwarts legacy fanfic
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Why did nobody tell me that the plot for Tsukasa4 was so funny. "Tsukasa your acting is mid unless you're in hysterics. please go try to be normal" (cue 2 weeks of Tsukasa failing until he realizes the answer is to work with another guy to write a fanfic backstory for his side character with 3 lines. and even then he tries too hard and accidentally fails to keep his side character a side character)
#project sekai#tsukasa4#tsukasa tenma#autumnal rambles#i will say with context i have a greater appreciation for the tsukasa4 trained card now for sure#'be the shadow' gacha but he has like 3 spotlights trained on him because he overacted his 3 line part#incredible visual storytelling#people after the show just stuck wondering. hey what on earth was the purpose of that random guy with 3 lines what was his deal#the answer is that local theater kid tried too hard. he's very sorry#this is all in jest i did enjoy the event a lot#and it DOES make sense for tsukasa to stuggle with this sort of thing#hope you can figure it out next time king#but it sounds like tsukasa5 is another struggle moment for him. which. that's fine too actually. it's funny to read#also this is just text but reki works as a really good foil to tsukasa. i think it's really funny how nene is like he's just like me fr....#i don't have enough screenshots for it but while i'm talking about tsukasa4 shoutout to emu card story 1 from the set#full otori sibling interaction..... it's so sweet to see how how much they all love their little sister
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am I the only person waiting until I actually have my hard copies in hand before reading the short stories? I've been avoiding social media all day because I'm scared of getting spoiled...
#i just want the excitement of having the books in hand before I read them!! is that so much to ask!!#I refuse to even log on to twitter rn because I know for a fact there are untagged spoilers flying around like crazy on there#idk maybe im weird for this but i just really want the pleasure of reading the physical copies first. to go in completely fresh#so i can enjoy them more fully#i caught a tiny glimpse of a spoiler yesterday (I scrolled before I could see too much) but I was so upset about it regardless#like!! idk man maybe this makes me old as fuck but i miss the days where you didn't have to worry about spoilers so much!!#i've felt so paranoid about it all weekend lmao can you tell#aftg#crow rambles
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ep 43 had me tearing up in a fucking shopping centre ‼️‼️
b+w alt version that I truly couldn't decide if I liked it more . Also I included a lot of thoughts in the tags but they're somewhat incoherent<3
#i dont know what i expected but i was waiting for a friend and too excited to wait until later#malevolent podcast#john doe#john doe malevolent#john malevolent#malevolent fanart#grimm art#ep 43#ep 43 left me with a lot of thoughts ... i didnt quite like how much of a recap it felt like at times but that might#be because ive been relistening and like yeah everyone knows that john 🙄 but that's not the case for everyone and with monthly uploads#things get forgotten easily#i find the discussion of “humanity” so interesting because John has shown that without someone that he has forcibly grown to value as an#equal... something he cannot do as the king of yellow as he is superior to all of his realm and presumably stays out of other elder god's#anyway. without that equality and enviroment to grow he fails to reach his goal of compassion and falls onto old ways.#John. The King in Yellow. shown by both times each has found themselves in human form do not just crave power and influence!!!#THEY CRAVE COMMUNITY!!! an endrich being not born or raised with nothing but power and ego#CRAVES COMMUNITY.#His goal of “humanity” is not a selfless goal like John projects - it is ultimately somewhat selfish as he does not want to be alone!!#which makes this desire so much more human#i don't know maybe this is just me spelling out whats already there but the way john and the witch argued about humanity frustrated me#it felt like they were missing the point or that perhaps the “good/evil” “black/white” retoric was already realised by me and john needed#realise it himself . which is fair !!!#i dont know!!!!#the witch was talking about how bad everyone was and how humanity is cruel and john was talking about Lily (#who also frustrates me how shes used in the plot somewhat she was literally just a nurse doing her job bro#) but to John - yes internally he is struggling with his moral greyness and im so proud of him for growing being himself SO PROUD#JUST.!!! he wants community. he needs community. he loves his friend. 'humanity' at its core does not matter as long as you try to be bette#and i think thats awesome and i really enjoyed the episode#guhh im rambling enjoy my tag rambling i dont know i want john to have more friends :(#yorrick can be another friend godd i love you yorrick so silly
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