#I REACHED THE WORD LIMIT
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Hi i just wanted to say I love your works and profile sm, I love how you represent fireafy and coinpin and each of their respective characters, and I especially love how you represent Coiny. I feel like from what I've seen people don't see how Coiny really is, they usually just reduce him to a jerk or a firey slapper. But he's so much more and so different from that lke in canon he's so driven and serious but then fun and chill when needed, and how he can be fun and silly but then empathetic and sweet when given. and I feel like the way you represent him is so accurate and takes evey aspect of him in canon as well as headcanons that just FIT HIM SO WELL and idk it just makes me so happy. I also LOVE your headcanon of him being able to pull both masculinity and femininity, I love it so much it emulates the essence of him so well so be so comfortable in himself and not have a shred of toxic masculinity or anything like that. And I love how you make him adore pin like YES HE ADORE AND LOVES and does whatever pin wants it just makes me so happy esp with how gorgeous she is and as someone who is also plus sized and having issues with self image seeing coiny adore pin like that makes me believe in myself more idk how to explain it but YEA hahah just really like how you depict his charcater as a whole
I also love all your designs for every character
But ye I just want to say that hahah
i saw this when it was sent yesterday and i was in school and i was SOOO HAPPY i was telling all my friends with tears in my eyes and squealing over how sweet of a message i received LIKE I HAD TO FORCE MYSELF NOT TO CRY AND I KEPT GETTING UP AND PACING AAHH😭😭😭 i have waited for when i have free time where i’m not super tired to respond better than i would tired But! THANK YOU SOSOSOSO MUCH!!! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME!!! YOU REALLY DONT!!! thank you thank you so much!!! i’ve been struggling with forming my thoughts and feelings into words recently so forgive me if this is a messy reply but AHH!!!
coiny is one of my favorite characters he’s sooOOO FUNNY AND CHARMING! i love expressing his silly side and how dumb he is sometimes so i do it in most of my work (because it’s lighthearted almost every time) and it makes me so happy to see him being so.. coiny! he is genuinely such an amazing character and the perfect balance of cool, kind, and idiotic(affectionately) he’s so nice and so compassionate and i appreciate that about him so much and I AM SO HAPPY THAT YOU CAN ENJOY MY PORTRAYAL OF HIM BECAUSE HE IS SO AWESOME! I LOVE EVERY PART OF HIM!!! and you like my headcanons!!! i forget what kind of coiny headcanons i have represented on this account but YESSS!!! COINY PULLING OFF FEMININE CLOTHES IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS TO THINK ABOUT! he is SO proud of it. he will put on a pink frilly dress and walk with confidence and feel as pretty as can be! i’ve been meaning to draw him in a dress for months actually (i have so much i want to draw all the time but i’m either really busy or i have zero motivation But this message gave me the motivation to actually try soon KEEP AN EYE OUT! maybe ill draw pin and coiny with their outfits swapped 🤫) he is one of the most positive and caring contestants on bfdi and he makes me so happy!!! he can wear both girly clothes and masculine clothes HE CAN WEAR WHATEVER HE WANTS and he will look TOTALLY AWESOME IN IT! and OMFGGG DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HOW MUCH HE LOVES PINNN SHE IS HIS WHOLE WORLD AND COINY IS HERS AS WELL! coiny will do anything for her he loves her so bad… AND!!! AHHHH!!!! I AM SO SO SO INCREDIBLY HAPPY MY PIN HUMANIZATION MAKES YOU FEEL THAT WAY!!! BRINGING PEOPLE SELF-CONFIDENCE AND EMPOWERMENT THROUGH MY DESIGNS AND REPRESENTATION IS MY ABSOLUTE GOAL WITH WHAT I DO!!! it seriously means everything to me that i’ve Actually been able to achieve that and help people with how they feel about themselves indirectly. my eyes are watering while typing this ARGHH i really just want everyone to know how beautiful they are no matter what their size or weight or height or color or LITERALLY ANYTHING is. and as someone who also struggles with their self-image/esteem it means even More to me because i know how it feels!!! seeing yourself in a design of your favorite character or a character you enjoy in general feels SO GOOD so i strive to do that as much as i can. body diversity and diversity in all aspects is incredibly important to me and i want to sprinkle it everywhere in whatever i do!!! everyone is so beautiful and different and i think that is a blessing!!! whoever is reading this is beautiful and whoever in the WORLD is too just how they are now!!! EVERYONE IS GORGEOUS!!! it may take a while to feel it and that’s okay but just know that you are!!!
in short i am happy i was able to touch your heart and make you smile and give you at least a little bit more confidence in yourself. you are amazing and so kind for sharing this all with me!!! i think you can tell now how much this did for me by how much i wrote (SORRY ITS HUGE BLOCKS OF TEXT) and i can’t thank you enough for liking my work from characterization to design. every time i get a message like this i will not stop thinking about it and i hold it close to me every time i draw Like those other messages about my pin gijinka from months back I STILL GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER. i’m really glad i can make you feel that way and i hope i have made many others feel the same way too. THANK YOU!!!💖💖💖🫶🫶🫶
#ps i’m trying to make a Not lighthearted comic about coiny and pin having a talk about bfdia and stuff#LIKE when pin said Let’s talk later… in tpot 2 ITS IF THEY ACTUALLY DID TALK LATER ABOUT ALL THAT STUFF#idk when it’s gonna be done but it’s going to have much more emotion and intensity than my usual fun and silly art#it’ll express their POVs and whatnot#I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN ILL FINISH IT BUT I HOPE YOU CAN LOOK FORWARD TO IT!#SORRY I WROTE SO MUCH IM JUST SOOSOSOSO HAPPY AND TOUCHED#I REACHED THE WORD LIMIT#joyjibberjabber
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pairing: messmer x wife!tarnished! reader
notes: i've never had anything i've written exceed a character limit before. can't believe the first time was because of a request, things i usually try to write short and sweet little hcs or stories for. anyways i hope this was enjoyable!
( part 1 )
He knew once you approached him that you would make your choice known, whether your answer would break his heart or not he was unsure. Either way he was sure he’d have no other option than to accept it. He knew his sweet, perfect, stubborn little Tarnished better than most.
Had you chosen to stay his cheeks would flush with delight. He’d sweep you into a tender embrace and secretly plan a feast befitting a king later that very night. The both of you would never again separate for longer than a day or two — never.
Especially not after the devastating news he’d just learned. Speaking of which, I doubt he’d acknowledge it so early on. If it hadn’t been for the topic of your decision, he’d have sent you away to spend some time brooding on his own for a good week.
“O darling returned, never again from thee I shall part.”
And thus begins your life anew as the Lightless Lady of the Shadow Keep.
If you were to leave then he’d beg you to stay just one last night, and hold you with all the care in the world. It would be quite difficult for you to leave him then, but he knew you’d find a way out of his arms eventually. He’d press a solemn kiss to your lips after ensuring you were well-prepared for wherever you would go next, tucking one of Marika’s blessings into your belt as he did so.
“Precious wife, apple of mine own eye,” he began. “Rest upon thine throne as Lord, but forget not thine home. Forget me, my dearest, not.”
#elden ring x reader#imbibe nectar :: anons#messmer x reader#messmer the impaler x reader#if the shakespearean grammar is a little off blame the fever#im sorry the second half is so short it's literally all i had left after reaching the word limit
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GREYGOLD'S BALDUR'S GATE 3 ADVENTURES Pt.1
ACT 1&2
As chronologically ordered as non-spoilery as possible
Intro Grim Grinning Greygold Gale Cooks Ranger Animal Companion: Bird Shadowheart Speaking with Animals Bird Ethics Pt1 Romancing Lae'zel Dream Guardian More Powerful Than Tadpole Dream Guardian Assumptions Bird Ethics Pt2 Ranger Animal Companions: Everyone Else Guidance Befuddle with Cuddles Shadowheart vs. Lae'zel Creche Adventures No Pressure Voss Greygold and Gods Tiefling Party Tiefling After Party Dream Guardian: Casual Wear Karlach Hugs Vampires and Puns Dancing with Wyll Barcus and Smokepowder Arrows Lae'zel: Romance to the Death Haircut and Astarion has Concerns Jaheira Glitch Nightsong Decision Nightsong and Bird Ethics Wrap-up Into the Mindflayer Hive Zevlor Needs Hugs Goddsdammit Boss Introductions Us Act2 Wrap-Up
Bonus Asks Comics
Greygold's Opinions On Companions
light pun
sleep mode
Blood Drow
Wyll Flirt W/Lae'zel
Vlaakith Loud
Battle Strategy
MASTERPOST ACT 3 (not including the final showdown)
MASTERPOST ACT 3 Final Showdown
MASTERPOST EPILOGUE
#Bg3#baldur's gate 3#greygold#bg3 fanart#bg3 comic#masterpost#I did it guys#I organized the thing :u#but apparently I've reach my word limit; had to split#shall pin this one up
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The scene where Xander stabs Teruko is like, hands down one of my favorite scenes in the entire series so far. Can I like, talk about that for a bit? It is genuinely such a god-tier setup for not only the themes of trust and deception in DRDT, but how it sets up one of my favorite things about the writing of DRDT as a whole. That is: how painfully aware DT-Dev is of how the standard Danganronpa tropes affect how us as audience members and fans (former or otherwise) of the canon series read and interact with fangans.
lets play spot the komaeda
()()()()() is like the byakuya/nagito/kokichi of the cast
I just hope ()()()()()() doesn't go crazy and kill in chapter 3. that would be way too predictable
()()()()() will obviously die in chapter 5
I think this scene in the LGI MV is the most upfront example of this (and though I won't get too into it because this post isn't about the David MV, I do think it's particularly interesting to note that this scene is in David's MV. Y'know, the liar character. The character that is known to put on a metaphorical mask to hide parts of himself.) And what I love so much about this is that DT-Dev uses these preconceived notions we've gained from our experience with the canon games, and uses that experience to enhance the themes of distrust and deception that are so prevalent in DRDT's story. Enter: Our lovely british boy.
this picture choice has nothing to do with the analysis by the way, I just think it's cute :) Xander is set up throughout the prologue and the first half of CH1 as Teruko's support character, presenting a very similar role to Sayaka Maizono from the first DR game, or Kaito Momota from NDRV3. Kind, upbeat, and supportive, so much so that David basically praises him for it
David: You're always full of energy and bravery to achieve your goals, no matter what they are. Yet at the same time, you're a compassionate person who takes the time to help others.
At the same time, he is by far the most mysterious character at this point of the story, due in part to his missing eye and the knowledge that it was uninjured before the events of the death game. This factor of early-game mystery also brings up some parallels between Xander and characters like Ultimate Impostor and Rantaro Amami. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't think anyone was expecting Xander to survive. Given the similarities he shares with first victims of the first game I'm sure a lot of people suspected he would be the first victim of DRDT, and if not that, most likely die in Chapter 5 due to canon danganronpa's self-fulfilling prophecy of killing off the support characters in the fifth case (Chiaki, Kaito, and Kyoko if we're counting DR1's bad ending.) And this is the thing that really makes me go insane. The way DT-Dev subverts these tropes that we've grown accustomed to is by taking them and spinning them on their head. Usually giving us the same, or a similar ending to these tropes, but twisting the execution in ways that leave us surprised and second-guessing what we know. But DRDT doesn't do this immediately. In fact, the first ten episodes of the series follow a very similar formula to the danganronpa games, even having a very similar motive to the first chapter of DR1 in the form of loved ones being threatened. That is, until the end of CH1-5, in which you are hit with this.
Xander: Sorry for this.
This scene makes me go insane. Apart from being wonderfully animated, executed, and amazing for both Teruko and Xander's arcs, it is also the first clue to us as an audience that this is not an ordinary fangan, and that fully putting our trust in the knowledge we have from the canon danganronpa games is a mistake. Because that knowledge will be used to deceive us when we least expect it to. In simpler terms: All that glitters is not gold - not everything is as it seems.
#I'm somewhat afraid that this post comes across as a high schooler saying the same things over and over again to reach a word limit#but I hope I managed to convey why this scene is one of my favorites in the series and what I think it's meant to indicate to the audience#{🍀It is an equal failing to trust everybody and to trust no one at all. and to trust no one at all.🌟}#~💫 a constellation!💫~#danganronpa despair time#drdt#xander matthews#drdt xander#teruko tawaki#drdt teruko
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So fucked up that obimaul is a rarepair. What do you mean not everyone is obsessed with enemies to lovers with a Force connection, where one side is completely obsessed with the other who barely acknowledges him (but is just as affected)
#hm i should make an original post tag#obimaul#like. say what you want but obi-wan saw a random dathomirian zabrak and immediately went 'maul?? alive??'#he DOES care about maul he just doesn't actively seek him out like maul does#post prompted by this song that makes me think about Maul in his crime lord era‚ all the luxury of the world within his reach‚#but none of it satisfies him because what he really wants is to find (and kill) kenobi#'another night up in the best suite; everything's gone wrong already‚ my body admits; dreaming so high the floor is the limit;#once again i got lost.. [...] another night i give myself‚ top of a skyscraper; i'm the king of the world‚ dreams for rent;#and when i look at myself i sigh with a low voice‚ 'i don't feel bad i just feel nothing''#(<- song is são paulo‚ 2015 by j��o)#it's a song about feeling dissatisfied with the life of fame because there's an emptiness he can't fill with sex drugs or luxuries#and from the context of the album it's likely he's thinking about a past lover he's still not over#so. imagine with me.#i might make something out of this. maybe.#but like. posting about songs that make me think obimaul thoughts. not very productive. almost no audience.#... and while making this post i've been attacked by yet another song with a very obimaul words#'lie to me‚ run from me‚ we swear it doesn't count‚ in this way of ours‚ but it's not because i hate you that i can't kiss you anymore'#<- pilantra by jão and anitta
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i swear this is my last post on this but even if i agreed with the idea that kevin is a coward - obviously i don't - but even if i did, i'd still be annoyed at how it reduces and ignores everything else we know about him.
he is a nervous wreck and an insufferable bitch and a scathing diva and has a drinking problem
he is also beautiful and brilliant and talented and unparalleled and determined and loyal and he has unwavering faith in the people who are worth his attention
those are just a few notable traits. kevin day is a nuanced character so it's time we start treating him accordingly
#my posts#my aftg posts#aftg#my rambles#my rants#kevin day#all for the game#the foxhole court#i have tolerated kevin slander for 10 years and i have reached my limit#i just. i just love him so much. and i want everyone to see how great he is#anyway no more posts about this i am banning the word from my and everyone else's vocabulary
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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I do think that the visions that Jack showed Kelly and Cas—of paradise—before he was born were less prophetic/promising and more of a defense mechanism as a nephil, an "Abomination." And the more I think about Jack's morality and "destiny," the more I feel distraught that the series ended with him as God.
#i have. many many thoughts and no words left to type them#limit has been reached. please come back after resting for 10 nonverbal hours#supernatural#spn#jack kline#jack studies#spn thoughts#spn finale#15x20#chuck won theory#castiel#kelly kline
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Random Togami Headcanon 13
TL;DR - Byakuya's bettered himself but he still has a long road of healing. Also, heads up. This one's not happy like most of the others. Gets a bit hopeful at the end but there's still a lot of sad topics here. Viewer discretion is advised. Now that he feels more empathy for others and possesses some capability for putting himself in another's shoes, thoughts he used to have about the lower class make him feel... off. Perhaps guilt or discomfort with himself. It doesn't help though looking at his classmates every school day and being reminded of the mindset he was raised with. It especially doesn't help when he looks at Makoto who helped him. Makoto being the commoner of all commoner's also hurts. He appreciates what Makoto's done to help him but it unintentionally stabs him hard within his chest that he needed someone's help to get to this point and the someone being a commoner he once wrote off. Next, with this empathy, the heir feels better with his life and happiness but fundamentally worse. It's as if he deteriorated though, logically, he knows it's not the case. He knows that the illogical side of his brain covers itself in the hides of reason and rationale. Essentially, Byakuya ends up having a grueling struggle with dealing with these emotions that, for the majority of his life, he buried and repressed. Emotions that both make him feel more fulfilled in life but that tear him apart inside. Bouts where he feels either extremely content with how he's turned out or that dread and despair that he's slipping back into his old ways. In fact, at times, it becomes overwhelming for him to handle which he especially hates. Being overwhelmed is yet another thing he once viewed as a weakness and, to some extent, he still does. Sometimes, to cope, jokes to himself on whether existing itself is something he feels is a weakness. However, though he has a lot of emotions and thoughts that upset him now as a bettered person, one big thing that pains him is that he has the capability and the intelligence to notice all of this. It's the acknowledgment that stings. The heir notices that he has a problem, that he probably needs help, maybe even therapy, but then he spirals more because of that realization. Why should HE need HELP for these problems of his?! He's an independent person! He should logically be able to handle this himself. He's always handled his problems on his own! Why should he now need someone or just a support system of people to aid in his path of healing? He feels gross for that support system being the classmates who he once adamantly despised with such vitriol. With the added empathy, he also feels shame as he doesn't want to hurt any more people in his life now. He has the hindsight to know this now. He questions himself. Is the situation he's in even that big of a deal and should he keep searching for answers on the "why" and "how"? Is it worth it? Comparisons to the peasants he used to once adamantly demonize also do not escape him. He feels worse because, while he's breaking at the seams, countless of other commoners have similar thoughts too. He's not unique and a bit of that stings his lingering superiority. Then, there is the fact that Byakuya feels even worse about this BECAUSE commoners can handle stuff like this and yet, he keeps saying that he can't due to his mental spirals. Either that or the older thoughts of hating commoners bites back by making him feel like he's "acting like one". He knows by this point that he's actively tearing himself down and that he needs to escape this cycle of mental abuse. He feels shame in himself though. He feels humiliated. Pathetic. Overly emotional in ways he's never felt before. He still has that hope though. The hope that he can get through his. The heir's already delt with so much whether canon, non-despair, or an au of some kind. He's continued on despite it all. And, though long ago, he would have pushed some of this hope off for it being too optimistic, he's grown to care less about that sort of thought anymore. Byakuya can do this.
#danganronpa#danganronpa headcanons#danganronpa byakuya#byakuya togami#togami headcanon series#text sector#basically he's in a state where he knows he can get better but it takes a toll on him at times cus he's hard on himself#knowing that it's okay to rely on others and reaching out is hard just in general and it's def the case for him cus he usually relies on hi#he has to basically get out of a mindset he's had all his life which is a difficult thing to do because it can take so many years#which is why it pains him cus he kinda wishes the could just get it fixed right away but he knows it's impossible#hope this wasn't too vent-y and it's okay if one cannot get through all of this as it's quite a lot to handle#i find this aspect of his character interesting though#one can question how he'd handle this change of his over time and if it takes a toll in some regards due to this being different for him#he's been wired with a certain way of thinking both in terms of viewing the lower class badly and trying to be as smart as he can#also does not help that he's still young but has acted like he's an adult his whole life or at least the expectation of what adults are#loosening up from that stress and pressure he has on himself both due to the environment he was born in and his own standards is hard#he hates it being “hard” though#he's the togami heir so having things be “difficult” for him “isn't supposed to happen”#also stings cus he thinks so highly of himself and what he's meant to achieve or what he's expected to achieve#just another one of my interpretations of his character though#i could/would have added more but there's a word limit i think??? might have missed stuff i wanted to talk about too#there's a lot to say and dive into and it's especially the case for me cus i care a lot about his character and analyzing him the best i ca#if i found a way to write more without it saying that it can't save my draft i would not have so many of these tags T-T#dunno if it's cus i use my computer to type these or if it's just the site or if i'd have to pay for something???#not sure ;-;
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Try saying that 3 times fast, the fuck?!
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every so often i think about how if i ever make a post or something that blows up, i'll immediately be harassed en masse by people claiming i'm a zionist
#i've seen the people you call zionists and that's when i know we're not speaking the same english#1) every time it's about someone who *isn't* pro-israel and/or *is* pro-palestine:#but what they *are* is somebody who condemns hamas or mourns 10/7 or calls out antisemitism or thinks israelis are normal people#defensive anti-propoganda on tumblr (where the majority opinion seems to be that israel and *anything and anyone remotely connected to it*-#-is Pure Evil) is not indicative of somebody's full opinions or their other actions#do you know how many progressive jews debate with pro-israeli-government jews offline and in more prominently jewish spaces?#no. because there's no room here to talk about any of that#not when discussion is seen as co-conspiring and the only real action is extreme action#jews *are* a close-knit community and a lot of jews probably don't feel comfortable airing their arguments within the community#because there's also a general feeling that regardless of our actual politics people are going to consider us a monolith and-#-be antisemetic across the board. this is a feeling that does not originate from but was heavily reinforced by the Holocaust.#2) i don't know how good of an idea it is to say this so bluntly but it's sorta horrifying how easily people will just say 'X is a zionist'#and expect that one word to carry so much meaning that no other explanation is required.#Zionist. Evil. Stay away.#i'm so fucking exasperated and disappointed#not only does *actual* zionism come in many different forms functionally#but the word means *nothing* when you use it to mean so many different things *which do not all hold the same weight*#blast babbles#jumblr#i/p#sorta#ask to tag#regarding the actual post here...#i'm not a zionist#i'm not an antizionist#i'm not comfortable trying to stick a label that's bigger than me over my name#i don't have any illusions that people will judge my opinions fairly either way#just don't say that i'm something i'm not#just because i say some of the same things as people you don't like#gonna have reblogs off but replies on. feel free to chip in. (edit: tag limit reached!)
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Due to a failure on my part to write anything for the past two days, I will not be on tumblr nor will I be playing Siffrin and the Craaaazy Time Loop until I’ve hit my word goal.
Optimally, this will encourage me to write sooner so I can do other things. As someone with ADD, we’ll see.
This post doesn’t count.
#personal#me things#writing#writing problems#word goal#limitations#what’s the point of tagging this#it’s not like i want/need this to reach a bunch of people#whatever#isat#in stars and time#siffrin and the craaaazy time loop
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eughhhhh why does my entire life revolve around ollie!!! not that im complaining, of course. if ollie isnt online then im thinking about ollie. if im not online then im thinking about ollie. oh, i did something that reminds me of ollie. would ollie like this? should i show this to ollie? i wonder if ollie does the same things i do. in fact, i wonder what ollie's routine is. that skk pic reminds me of us! ill tag them. i found a silly audio i could send to them. i also saw a picture of a cat. ollie seems to like cats. i should compare him to them. they mentioned they like getting compared to cats. and biting stuff (or themselves, really). ollie really does sound like one. their bedtime is around 11:00 pm. but they live in ireland, which is around 8 hours ahead from where i live, so its usually 3 in the afternoon when they go offline. they get up at midnight in my time, so 8 o'clock there. i try to pass the time but it takes forever. sometimes ill nap or read. maybe masturbate. it gets boring without them. ollie's never skateboarded before; they think its scary. he said they think their height is 5'1, just an inch under me. i like to tease ollie about that. ollie takes really short showers, too (just like him). i also tease them about that. it doesnt seem to like flirting, but when its playful and non-genuine they find it funny, although i try to avoid it altogether. in a discord chat, before they met me, ollie said partner was a term they favored over girlfriend/boyfriend. i think its cute; im starting to prefer 'partner' too. it said they thought about cuddling a lot. ill try to bring it up once in awhile to know theyre not alone in that thought. they bought a plant after we first met. we call each other names a lot, like 'homosexual' or 'gay' or smth about the country we live in. its fun to do that. theyll make posts on the transmasc dazai headcanon. it projects a lot onto dazai, especially 15zai. they like bsd gacha reactions but not the ooc ones yet he stills watches them anyways. the only types he doesnt watch are the videos including youtube shorts. its relatable though. they recently made a strawpage if any of y'all have scrolled so far. ollie is autistic and says they take showers a lot because he doesnt like being sweaty. it said theyre asexual so even if theyre fine with sex jokes, i also try not to bring them up often. he has three dogs in total, four at their dad's home (the ones most popular in being sent to me are ruby and archie; his dad's girlfriend has two other dogs called suzie and max) and one at their mom's (poppy). they call their mom 'mam' which i, again, think is cute. their birthday is december 20th. thats only six days before mine. ollie sends me voice messages a lot and i really like their voice. some words are kinda hard to hear with the dialect differences but its mainly understandable. ollie introduced me to the game pony town a few weeks ago and i really go on there to boop and kiss them. other than that, im not online often. purple, yellow, certain shades of green and brown, and blue are some colors ollie said they liked. i once asked if theyd rate himself out of ten. ollie's answer was '10/10 ofc'. ill think about if i could vent about unimportant things that seem important at the moment. ollie could do the same to me. i wouldnt mind. i find that everything about it is important. it might like this song or this band or this genre. whats his favorite author? should i vc or is it at their moms home? why wont they respond? ollie must be busy. but what if ollie isnt? what if theyre ignoring me? i really do know i need to stop getting caught up in my head. i know they care for me. but even the tiniest bit of thinking they dont like me makes me upset. but then they text me and i get happy again!! i love talking to them <3 it brings me comfort. speaking of comfort, they'll try to make me feel better when i mention im sad, it doesnt help much, but i appreciate the thought. i really do. ollie's kind.
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god i think this blog is going to kill me. i genuinely don't know what to do. should i only post art?? should i wipe it off the face of the earth?? should i make a new blog and repost everything there?? should i delete all posts and then repost all the art here??.
i don't want to post everything again because i've posted so much art, but also i don't think i have to delete anything?? i mean the art tag is right there!, but what if someone doesn't want to look for art, even if it's really simple?? what if no one looks at anything i make ever again!!!!!!!!!
#i think i'd rather do a physics exam than keep thinking about my future#random#anyone got any words of encouragement?? i'm reaching my limit here i swear to god#i know my fears are irrational btw don't worry i'm not trying to instill pity on anyone#some times you just need to yell to the void#i can't decide if this blog is a void or not though
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If I had a nickel for every time an artist I admire reblogged a screenshot of my tags on their Rain World art, I'd have 2 nickels...
#Reks Speaks#Take a shot for every time I say something along the lines of 'What I'm surprised people like my tags!' you'd die#I guess even after all these years I'm still really shocked my words do truly reach people#Though that could be due to my mindset of 'I'd like the artist to see this but if they don't that's okay!'#But I'm always expecting the don't part#Then they do see and and then they like if enough to share other while thanking me#It's a very surreal experience but I'm incredibly happy that I managed to make them happy#Even for a little while :}#Also one of these artists in question is Fly. Hello Fly 👋#Also side note I didn't know my tags could get where that huge CHRIST#The 30 tag + 140 word limit is the only thing stopping my tendrils from taking over fully
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there's a lot of things people blame for why fandoms feel like ghost towns these days, but no one's really talked about the way discord's contributing to it
#its like#people are trying to force fit discord's chatrooms into forum boards#except discord is just. really really *really* poorly setup for that#and theres no way to archive or share it so everything said in it is easily lost despite personal export or community pins or search option#and like#vaguely hearing about the way some people are unsatisfied with them/feeling unfufilled in the response to them#a lot of people would be better off posting those things to places like tumblr#where there isnt a time limit on when people see or respond to them#part of what's scary/frustrating on tumblr rn is some fandoms arent good about reblogging to posts or tag rambling#like with bad buddy a large part of the fun was the enthusiastic and in depth tag rambles and the way responses built on each other#vs something like kinnporsche which feels much more like-oriented#like? its not like theres any one way to fandom#and there's nothing actually wrong with likes or quiet reblogs#but vaguely hearing about the way some people were/are really upset with some servers im just kinda like#idk#feels a bit like people trying to force a square thru a circle or that they're looking in the wrong spaces for what they want#.......this is not a complaint for my space ajkds i think i've carved out a pretty happy space for myself!#im just checking the reblog graphs of some old vs new stuff and thinking about a convo other cookie and i were having over the weekend#i have a lot of friends around and i love everyone who's happy to ramble with me#but i do feel a slight case of DM burnout rn where mostly people reach out to me via DMs instead of reblogs#which is a very different dynamic#its like. hmmm words#i love DMs but the pressure of responding to a lot of individual messages#vs something like reblogs which is more open forum for everyone and feels more communal#if that makes sense?#the difference between visiting one person at home vs casually hanging out with a group at a cafe#and the lovely thing about tumblr specifically is that i can set down a reblog chain for several days if i need#before returning to it later when i have more time/energy#its got Longevity that discord lacks u know#........okay enough tag musings from me ajkfhjdgfhj BYE
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