#I JUST IMAGINE HIM SAYING IT SO POLITE LIKE NO !!!! YOU HAVE TO SAY IT WITH FEELING. WITH YOUR BALLS
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
lizziesangel · 4 hours ago
Note
can you do another one shot of introverted reader and extroverted qb Rafe and he just follows her around and still crushes on her and then he like asks her out or something you can make this in your own way
finally part two!! ⟢ part one
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
as the self-defense unit wraps up, you and lana grab your things and head toward the locker rooms. the air between you is lighter now, the drills and awkward encounters behind you—for the moment, at least. lana nudges you with her shoulder, her mischievous grin already in place.
“did you see what happened to jason in the middle of class?” she asks, barely containing her laughter. “i mean, secondhand embarrassment doesn’t even begin to cover it.”
you stifle a laugh, glancing over at her. “what did he think was going to happen? asking mia out in the middle of the drills? who even does that?”
lana throws her hands up dramatically. “exactly! like, dude, we’re learning how to escape a chokehold, and he’s over here trying to escape the friend zone. bad timing, jason. bad. timing.”
you snort, unable to hold back your amusement. “and then mia’s face? she looked like she wanted the ground to swallow her whole.”
“she didn’t even say anything! she just shook her head and walked away!” lana cackles, practically doubling over as she recalls the moment. “poor guy stood there for a solid ten seconds, looking like he’d just been hit by a bus.”
“it was funny,” you admit, “but also kind of sad. like, imagine building up all that courage just to get publicly rejected.”
lana shakes her head, still giggling. “i mean, yeah, i felt bad for him. for, like, half a second. but you have to admit, it was iconic. mia didn’t even blink.”
you laugh, the image replaying in your mind, but then lana’s smirk takes on a different edge. she gives you a sly look, and you immediately know you’re in trouble.
“speaking of moments,” she begins, dragging out the words, “what’s going on with you and rafe cameron?”
your laughter dies in your throat, replaced by a groan. “oh my gosh, lana. nothing is going on.”
“nothing?” she echoes, raising an eyebrow. “girl, he was staring at you like you were the answer to all of life’s questions. and don’t even try to deny it—i saw it.”
you roll your eyes, trying to play it cool. “he wasn’t staring. he was just… focused on the drill.”
“focused on you,” she corrects, wagging a finger at you. “i mean, i can’t blame him. you two looked like the cover of some YA romance novel over there, all wrist grabs and lingering eye contact.”
“lana, oh my gosh, stop.” you shove her lightly, your face burning. “it’s not like that.”
“oh, but you wish it was?” she teases, wiggling her eyebrows.
“no!” you insist, laughing despite yourself. “you’re so annoying.”
lana grins triumphantly, but before she can press further, you narrow your eyes and shift the spotlight. “okay, let’s talk about you and topper, then.”
her smug expression falters. “what about me and topper?” she asks, feigning innocence.
you mimic her earlier teasing tone. “oh, nothing. just that you were blushing a lot while you two were partnered up. and don’t even try to deny it—i saw it.”
“i was not blushing,” she huffs, but her face betrays her, turning pink at the accusation.
“you so were!” you shoot back, laughing. “and don’t think i didn’t notice how he kept leaning in to talk to you, all ‘are you okay? is my grip too tight?’”
“okay, first of all, he was just being polite,” lana retorts, crossing her arms. “second of all, you’re deflecting.”
“am i, though?” you challenge, raising an eyebrow. “because it sounds to me like someone has a little crush.”
lana groans, throwing her head back dramatically. “fine! whatever! he’s cute, okay? but he’s also topper thornton, which means he’s probably, like, ninety percent annoying and ten percent tolerable.”
you smirk. “sounds like someone’s trying to justify their feelings.”
“and it sounds like someone’s avoiding the fact that rafe cameron was basically undressing them with his eyes,” she fires back.
the two of you dissolve into laughter, your playful banter echoing down the hallway. for all the awkwardness of the class, you can’t help but feel grateful for moments like this—light, ridiculous, and completely you.
Tumblr media
it’s been a week since the self-defense class, but you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about rafe cameron since then. not that you’d admit it to lana.
she’d never let you hear the end of it. right now, though, you’re trying to focus on your spanish class, scribbling notes as señor martinez drones on about verb conjugations. lana is sitting to your left, doodling absentmindedly in her notebook, while rafe is on your right, leaning back in his chair with a bored expression that says he’d rather be anywhere else.
you try not to notice how close he’s sitting. or how his cologne lingers faintly in the air. definitely not noticing.
“señor cameron,” señor martinez suddenly says, breaking through the hum of your thoughts. you glance up to see the older man staring pointedly at rafe, his thick-rimmed glasses slipping down his nose. “por favor, conteste esta pregunta. ¿cómo se dice, ‘i like to play football’ en español?”
rafe blinks, his posture straightening slightly. you can tell from the way his brow furrows that he has no idea what the answer is. he shifts in his seat, his gaze darting toward you briefly before landing back on the teacher.
“uh…” he starts, clearly stalling. “yo… gusta… uh…”
you glance at him out of the corner of your eye, trying not to laugh at his obvious struggle. he looks genuinely panicked now, scratching the back of his neck like it’ll somehow help him come up with the right words.
without thinking, you lean slightly toward him and scribble on the edge of your notebook: me gusta jugar al fútbol.
sliding the notebook closer to him with your left hand, you tap the words lightly with your pen before sitting back, acting like nothing happened. rafe’s eyes dart to the paper, and then to you. he catches on quickly, his lips twitching into a small, grateful smile.
“me gusta jugar al fútbol,” he repeats, his pronunciation a little off but passable. he looks up at señor martinez, who nods approvingly.
“muy bien, señor cameron,” the teacher says before moving on to the next victim in his line of questioning.
rafe exhales quietly, and you feel his shoulder brush yours as he leans closer, whispering just loud enough for you to hear. “thanks. i owe you one.”
you shrug, keeping your eyes on your notebook. “you’ll survive.”
“yeah, because of you,” he says, his tone teasing but sincere. you can feel his gaze lingering on you, and your cheeks warm involuntarily.
lana, who has been unusually quiet, suddenly clears her throat dramatically. “i see you two are getting along nicely,” she whispers, her voice dripping with mock innocence.
you nudge her under the desk with your foot, shooting her a warning look. “focus, lana.”
“oh, i am,” she replies with a grin, glancing pointedly between you and rafe.
Tumblr media
you and lana walk out of spanish class, your bags slung over your shoulders as you weave through the bustling hallway. the faint smell of old textbooks and cleaning supplies lingers in the air, blending with the hum of chatter from other students.
“so,” lana says, adjusting the strap of her bag and glancing at you, “are we pretending that señor martinez’s lecture didn’t put the entire class to sleep?”
you snort. “you mean only you? i saw you zoning out halfway through.”
“hey, i was conserving my energy,” she defends, holding up her hands. “that conjugation nonsense was not giving what it needed to give.”
you laugh softly, shaking your head as the two of you make your way toward your lockers. the conversation shifts to weekend plans, lana animatedly describing some pop-up event she wants to drag you to, when someone passes by on your right.
it’s him.
“hey,” he says, his voice breaking through your conversation like a gentle ripple. he’s walking just slow enough to catch your attention without completely stopping. “thanks for earlier. you saved me with that spanish sentence.”
he flashes you a smile—not the usual cocky smirk you’ve seen him give other people, but something softer, genuine. the kind that makes your chest tighten unexpectedly.
“oh, uh, no problem,” you manage to say, your voice steady despite the warmth creeping up your neck.
he gives a small nod, the corners of his mouth tugging upward just a little more, and then continues walking past you, blending into the crowd.
lana waits until he’s out of earshot before turning to you, her eyebrows raised and her grin positively devious. “okay. what was that?”
you roll your eyes, trying to play it cool. “he was just saying thank you.”
“mmm, sure,” she says, drawing out the words. “because guys like rafe cameron totally go out of their way to say thank you for help in class.”
“it’s called being polite,” you counter, though your voice wavers slightly, betraying your attempt at indifference.
“polite?” lana mimics, her voice dripping with mockery. “girl, he smiled at you like you just solved all his problems. that was not polite; that was something else.”
you shake your head, biting back a smile. “you’re ridiculous.”
“am i?” she teases, bumping her shoulder into yours. “or am i just really good at spotting crush vibes when i see them?”
you groan, quickening your pace to escape her relentless teasing, but the fluttery feeling in your chest doesn’t go away.
Tumblr media
a few days rolls by, and it’s time for PE again. the memory of last week’s self-defense unit still lingers in your mind, though you’ve done your best to push it aside. unfortunately, lana hasn’t let you live it down.
“back to the battlefield,” she says dramatically as you walk into the gym together, her water bottle swinging in her hand. “do you think coach davis will make us pair up the same way as last time?”
you glance at her, trying to gauge whether she’s genuinely curious or just looking for an opportunity to tease you again. “i don’t know,” you reply, keeping your tone casual. “probably. he seems like a ‘stick to the plan’ kind of guy.”
lana smirks, nudging you lightly. “good news for you, then.”
“what’s that supposed to mean?” you ask, feigning innocence as you open your water bottle and take a sip.
“oh, nothing,” she replies with a sly grin. “just that a certain quarterback might be looking forward to this more than you think.”
“ooh, look,” lana adds in a whisper, nudging you with her elbow as you make your way toward your spot. “there’s your favorite partner.”
you glance over instinctively and spot rafe standing with the rest of the football team. he’s tossing a basketball between his hands, chatting with topper and a couple of others, looking relaxed and completely at ease.
you try not to linger too long, but as if sensing your gaze, he looks up and meets your eyes. his lips curve into a small, knowing smile, and you quickly look away, your heart doing an unintentional somersault.
“stop it,” you mutter to lana, who’s practically vibrating with excitement at your reaction.
“i’m not even doing anything,” she says innocently, though the smug look on her face says otherwise.
you roll your eyes, but before you can fire back, coach davis claps his hands together, gathering the class’s attention.
“alright, folks!” he booms. “we’re picking up where we left off last week. same pairs, same drills, new moves.”
lana shoots you a triumphant look, barely able to contain her laugh. “told you.”
“shut up,” you mutter under your breath, your cheeks already warming as you glance toward the corner of the gym. sure enough, there’s rafe, standing with the other football players, tossing a basketball between his hands and looking entirely unbothered by the world around him.
when your name is called, followed by rafe’s, you take a deep breath and start walking toward him, feeling Lana’s smug gaze on your back the entire way.
“guess it’s us again,” he says, stopping in front of you. his tone is casual, but there’s a glimmer of amusement in his eyes.
“lucky me,” you reply, trying to sound neutral as you set your water bottle on the floor, though your voice comes out a little more sarcastic than you intended.
he chuckles, his hands resting lightly on his hips. “you say that like it’s a bad thing.”
you roll your eyes but can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.
“ready for round two?” he asks, his tone teasing but warm. there’s a flicker of something in his eyes—maybe amusement, maybe anticipation—but you don’t dwell on it for long.
“i’m ready if you are,” you reply, trying to match his confidence.
this week’s drills involve more complex moves—blocking, evading, and redirecting. rafe listens to coach davis’s explanation but keeps sneaking glances at you, like he’s more interested in your reaction than the actual instructions. you catch him once, and he quickly looks away, scratching the back of his neck with a sheepish grin.
when it’s time to practice, rafe takes his position in front of you, his hands raised slightly. “alright, let’s see what you’ve got.”
you narrow your eyes playfully. “don’t go easy on me.”
his grin widens. “wouldn’t dream of it.”
the first few attempts are clumsy, just like last week, but this time, there’s an unspoken ease between you. the tension feels lighter, replaced by a strange sort of rhythm. when you stumble on one of the blocks, rafe catches your arm instinctively, steadying you without a second thought.
“you okay?” he asks, his voice soft.
“yeah,” you reply quickly, brushing it off. “just lost my balance.”
“good thing i’m here, then,” he says, his grin returning. he’s teasing, but there’s a sincerity in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
as the drill continues, you notice how his confidence contrasts with the careful way he moves around you, never pushing too hard, always adjusting to your pace. it’s almost… considerate. by the end of the session, you’re both slightly out of breath, your cheeks flushed—not just from the exercise.
Tumblr media
rafe is surprisingly focused, following coach’s instructions and helping you figure out the movements without making it awkward—well, mostly. he adjusts his stance a couple of times, his hands hovering near your arms to guide you, but he never oversteps, which you appreciate.
“alright, now try shifting your weight forward,” he says, watching as you attempt to push him off balance.
you give it your best shot, planting your feet and leaning into the motion, but he barely moves, his footing solid.
“okay, not bad,” he says, grinning. “but maybe try using a little more…” he pauses, clearly searching for the right word.
“force?” you supply, raising an eyebrow.
“yeah, that.” he nods, his grin widening. “don’t be afraid to go for it.”
you try again, this time putting more effort into the movement. to your surprise, he actually stumbles back a step, his expression shifting to mock surprise.
“whoa—okay,” he says, holding up his hands in surrender. “you’ve got some hidden strength there.”
you laugh despite yourself, shaking your head. “yeah, sure. i’m terrifying.”
“hey, i’m just saying,” he replies, his tone teasing. “remind me not to mess with you.”
lana, paired with topper a few feet away, catches the exchange and immediately starts making faces at you behind rafe’s back. you shoot her a glare, mouthing stop while trying not to laugh.
“what’s so funny?” rafe asks, glancing between you and lana.
“nothing,” you say quickly, straightening up and avoiding his gaze.
laa smirks, her voice carrying just enough for you to hear. “oh, it’s definitely something.”
you groan inwardly, already dreading whatever teasing lana has planned for later. for now, though, you focus on the drill, pretending not to notice the way rafe’s smile lingers just a little
Tumblr media
the end of class rolls around, and as everyone starts clearing up and heading toward the locker rooms, rafe lingers near you, casually adjusting the strap of his gym bag. lana notices, of course, and shoots you a knowing look before wandering off toward the door with topper trailing behind her.
you sling your water bottle over your shoulder, about to follow, when rafe steps a little closer. “hey,” he says, his tone casual but with just a hint of hesitation.
“hi,” you reply, glancing up at him curiously.
“so, uh…” he rubs the back of his neck, his usual confidence slipping for just a moment. “are you going to the game tonight?”
you blink, caught a little off guard. “the football game?”
“yeah,” he gives a short laugh, as if there’s any other game he could be talking about. “i mean, it’s kind of a big one. with a rival school and all that.”
you chew on your lip, considering. “ah, i don’t know. i haven’t really thought about it.”
“oh, come on,” he says, a teasing edge creeping into his tone. “i’m playing tonight.”
“i know,” you say with a faint laugh. “you’re the captain.”
there’s a flicker of something in his eyes—maybe amusement, maybe something else entirely. “right. so… you’ll come?”
before you can answer, lana reappears, practically materializing out of thin air. “we’ll be there!” she announces brightly, cutting off whatever excuse you were about to come up with.
your head snaps toward her, eyes wide. “we will?”
“yeah,” lana says, completely unbothered by your subtle glare. “wouldn’t miss it.”
rafe’s grin widens, his gaze flickering between you and lana. “great. see you tonight, then.”
just as you’re about to protest—or at least question why lana is suddenly speaking for you—topper walks by, overhearing the last bit of the conversation. he stops, turning to lana with a raised eyebrow.
“you’re going to the game?” he asks, his tone curious but laced with something else, something like amusement.
lana tilts her head at him, a playful smirk dancing on her lips. “why? you don’t want me there?”
topper stares at her for a second, then shakes his head, the corner of his mouth twitching into a half-smile. “no, i didn’t say that.”
“good,” lana replies breezily, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “because we’ll be there.”
topper blinks, momentarily at a loss for words, before recovering with a lopsided grin. “cool. yeah. that’s… cool.”
you glance between them, unsure whether to roll your eyes or laugh. meanwhile, rafe is still standing next to you, watching the whole exchange unfold with an amused look on his face.
“see you tonight,” rafe says again, this time directing it more toward you. his voice is quieter, as if it’s just for you, and there’s something in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
“yeah,” you manage, your voice a little softer than you intended. “see you.”
rafe’s grin widens, his eyes lighting up in a way that makes your chest tighten. “great. see you then.”
as he walks away with topper, lana nudges you with her elbow, a mischievous glint in her eye.
“you’re welcome,” she says, grinning.
“oh my gosh, did you see the way he was looking at you? you’re so going to that game.”
“lana,” you groan, but she’s already steering you toward the door, topper trailing behind like a lost puppy.
“oh, and topper?” lana calls over her shoulder. “you’d better actually play well tonight if i’m showing up.”
topper laughs, running a hand through his hair. “don’t worry, i’ll make it worth your while.”
“you’re welcome, by the way,” she says, grinning.
“for what?” you ask, even though you already know where this is going.
“getting us prime seats to watch your boy play tonight,” she teases.
you groan, shaking your head. “he’s not my—”
“oh, save it,” she interrupts, laughing. “i’m just saying, this is gonna be very entertaining.”
you shoot lana a look, but she just grins, completely unfazed. “you realize your boy is going to be there as well.”
“ahhh, this is going to be so much fun,” she says, and for some reason, you can’t help but smile too.
Tumblr media
you and lana are in her room, sorting through her closet to find something suitable for the football game. clothes are strewn across her bed, some tossed on the floor, and lana is holding up a navy sweater against herself in the mirror.
“what about this? casual but cute, right?” she asks, turning to you.
“it’s cute,” you say, trying not to laugh at the chaos around you. “but are we really dressing up for a football game?”
lana shoots you a look. “first of all, yes. second of all, you need to look extra cute. for a special reason.”
lana holds up a cropped sweater, frowning. “do i go with this? or the green one with the little buttons?”
“the green one,” you say without hesitation. “it makes your eyes pop.”
she nods thoughtfully, tossing the sweater onto a growing pile of rejected options. “okay, green it is. what about you? you can’t just show up in your usual jeans and hoodie. this is a game. there’s a whole vibe.”
before you can respond, lana’s younger sister amalia bursts into the room, a bundle of energy as always. she’s clutching a bowl of popcorn, her hair in a loose braid. at fifteen, she has that untamed curiosity that makes her impossible to ignore.
“what’s going on in here?” amalia asks, plopping down on the floor and grabbing one of lana’s discarded sneakers.
“getting ready for the game,” lana says, tossing the sweater onto the bed and grabbing a scarf.
amalia plops onto the corner of the bed, narrowly avoiding a pile of jeans. “so, like… are you going because you actually care about football, like, someone specific?”
“amalia!” you gasp, laughing, while lana groans.
“obviously, we’re going for the game,” lana says, dragging out the last word like it’s painfully obvious.
“sure you are,” amalia says, smirking. she looks at you. “so, which is it? topper or rafe?”
both lana and you freeze mid-motion, slowly turning to look at her. “what?” you say in unison, your voices dripping with confusion and maybe a hint of panic.
“oh my god, it is true.” amalia’s eyes widen, her tone full of mock scandal. “i mean, i heard you talking on the phone,” she says nonchalantly, taking a bite of her granola bar.
lana’s face contorts into a mix of horror and disbelief. “you were eavesdropping?”
“no!” amalia says defensively, though her grin betrays her. “i just walked past your room, and i heard you say something about rafe. or was it topper? honestly, you were talking so fast, i couldn’t tell.”
“besides, we have thin walls. i can hear every conversation you have.”
you bury your face in your hands while lana groans loudly, tossing a sweatshirt at the younger sister. “you’re the absolute worst, you know that?”
she giggles, dodging the sweatshirt. “what? i’m just curious! so, which one is it? rafe or topper?”
“neither,” you say quickly, trying to sound as calm as possible. “we’re just going because… we have nothing better to do.”
amalia doesn’t look convinced, her eyes darting between the two of you like she’s trying to crack a code. “uh-huh. sure.”
you bury your face in your hands. “can we not do this right now?”
“oh, come on,” she says, grinning. “i have to live vicariously through you guys. my life is so boring.”
her older sister snickers. “you’re fifteen, amalia. you’re supposed to have a boring life.”
amalia rolls her eyes. “whatever. you’re lucky mom and dad aren’t here, or they’d totally make me go with you guys.”
lana points to the door, her tone firm. “okay, get out. now. before i tell mom you stole her granola bars again.”
amalia gasps dramatically, clutching the half-eaten bar to her chest. “you wouldn’t.”
with a huff, amalia stands and heads for the door, but not before throwing one last grin over her shoulder. “fine, but if you don’t tell me what happens tonight, i’m stealing your makeup.”
“go away, amalia!” lana yells, and the door slams shut behind her.
“you’re such a snitch,” could be heard from the other side of the door.
as the silence settles, you and lana exchange a look, and then burst into laughter.
“she’s impossible,” you say, shaking your head.
lana smirks, reaching for her eyeliner. “she’s also not wrong about you and rafe, though.”
you grab a pillow and throw it at her. “shut up!”
Tumblr media
the stadium lights flood the field as you and lana make your way to the bleachers. the energy in the air is palpable, the crowd buzzing with excitement as the game is set to begin. the school colors are everywhere—navy and red banners, painted faces, and a sea of matching shirts.
lana’s decked out in navy, her outfit effortlessly stylish, while you’re in red, wearing your school hoodie with pride. she loops her arm through yours as you weave through the crowd.
“this is so chaotic,” lana says, laughing as you dodge a group of cheerleaders running toward the sidelines.
“you’re the one who wanted to come early,” you tease.
“early means we get good seats,” she replies, tugging you along.
as you near the edge of the bleachers, a familiar figure catches your eye. rafe is standing by the fence near the field, already in his uniform, looking every bit the golden boy quarterback he is. his helmet is tucked under one arm, and he’s talking to a teammate, but the moment he spots you, his face lights up.
he steps away, jogging over. “hey!”
“hi,” you reply, a little breathless from the crowd.
“i, uh, saved you and lana some seats,” he says, gesturing toward a spot near the middle of the bleachers, right in prime view of the field.
“oh, thanks!” you say, genuinely surprised and a little touched.
“of course,” he says casually, but there’s a flicker of something in his tone that makes your stomach flip.
meanwhile, lana has already found her focus—topper is lingering a few steps away, looking effortlessly cool in his jersey. she doesn’t waste any time sidling up to him, her voice light and playful as she says, “topper, is this your game face, or do you always look this serious?”
topper smirks, tilting his head at her. “you tell me. think it’s intimidating enough?”
“intimidating? not quite,” she teases, twirling a strand of hair around her finger.
you glance at her, rolling your eyes slightly but smiling. she’s clearly in her element, and for a moment, you’re distracted by their banter.
“hey,” rafe says, drawing your attention back to him.
you look up at him, his expression softer now. “yeah?”
“so, i was thinking…” he starts, trailing off for just a second before giving you a teasing look.
you arch an eyebrow, leaning slightly closer. “really? you were thinking?”
his grin deepens, and he nudges your arm lightly with his elbow. “yeah, shut up. i was thinking…” he pauses again, this time looking a little nervous, though he hides it well. “if i win this game tonight, would you… wanna go out with me?”
you blink, caught completely off guard. his words hang in the air for a moment, and you can’t help the way your lips curve into a smile.
“seriously?” you ask, your voice soft but full of amusement.
“dead serious,” he replies, his eyes locked on yours, a mix of confidence and vulnerability in his expression.
your smile widens, warmth blooming in your chest. “well… i guess i’ll have to cheer extra loud, then.”
his grin stretches across his face, brighter than you’ve ever seen it. “i’ll hold you to that.”
before you can say anything else, lana suddenly appears at your side, her cheeks slightly pink from talking to topper. “come on, we need to grab those seats before someone else does.”
rafe nods, stepping back but keeping his eyes on you. “i’ll see you after the game?”
you nod, your heart still racing. “good luck, captain.”
“thanks,” he says, his voice warm, before jogging back toward his team.
as you and lana make your way to the bleachers, she nudges you with her elbow, her grin mischievous. “sooo… what was that about?”
you shrug, trying to play it cool, but the smile tugging at your lips gives you away.
“uh-huh,” she says, her tone dripping with satisfaction. “you’re so coming to every game from now on.”
you laugh, feeling a little giddy. maybe you just might.
Tumblr media
the game has been intense, and the crowd is on edge. the scoreboard has been a back-and-forth battle, but now, as the clock winds down, rafe's team is trailing by just a few points. the stands are buzzing with nervous energy as the players huddle on the field.
you’re perched on the edge of your seat, your eyes glued to rafe, who is looking more focused than ever. he’s been carrying the weight of the game ever since their second best star player was taken out with an injury. it’s clear that he’s frustrated, his jaw clenched as he scans the field, but there’s something else in his eyes: determination.
topper stands beside him, clearly trying to keep up with the intensity, but it’s hard not to notice that rafe’s doing most of the work. he’s calling the plays, directing the team, and every move he makes looks calculated—almost like he’s pushing his limits, but you can see in the way he carries himself that he’s not going to give up.
the clock is ticking down, seconds slipping away like sand in an hourglass.
“come on, come on!” lana mutters beside you, her voice almost lost in the roar of the crowd. you glance at her, her eyes fixed on rafe and topper, and then at the field. the tension is so thick you could almost cut it with a knife.
rafe takes the ball, his eyes scanning for an opening. he’s got no choice now; it’s all on him. he fakes a pass to topper, sending the defenders rushing toward him, then in one swift motion, he dodges a tackle and charges down the field. the crowd rises to its feet, the energy growing with every step rafe takes.
you can’t help but hold your breath as you watch him break through the last line of defense, topper sprinting beside him, staying just close enough to act as backup. rafe’s legs move like they’re made of steel, his eyes locked on the end zone.
with seconds left on the clock, he passes the ball to topper, who’s just a few yards from the end zone. topper catches it and pivots, leaping into the air just as a defender tries to block him. time seems to slow as the ball arcs through the air and lands perfectly in topper’s hands. the crowd erupts as he crosses the goal line, securing the game-winning touchdown.
you can barely hear yourself think over the deafening roar of the crowd. you jump up with lana, both of you screaming and clapping in excitement. rafe’s face lights up as the team floods onto the field to congratulate topper, but he’s still scanning the crowd for someone.
you catch his eye, and for a split second, everything else fades away. his grin is wide, the exhaustion and tension melting off his face, replaced by sheer triumph.
“looks like you’ll be getting that date after all,” lana says, her voice full of teasing as she nudges you, but you barely hear her. all you can focus on is rafe’s smile, the way he’s looking at you from across the field.
you can feel your heart skip a beat as the final whistle blows. the game is over, and against all odds, rafe’s team pulled through.
lana cheers next to you, but you’re still staring at rafe, a grin tugging at the corner of your lips. he winks at you, the energy of the win still buzzing in his movements.
it’s official: rafe cameron just won the game—and, if you’re being honest, you think he just might’ve won a little bit of your heart too, especially when he was looking right at you after winning the game.
Tumblr media
MASTERLIST
Tumblr media
CURRENT TAGLIST⋆⭒˚。⋆
@maybankslover ⟢ @honeyluvsatj ⟢ @zazidot ⟢ @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 ⟢ @lunaleah ⟢ @maybanksangel ⟢ @wtfdudesblog. ⟢ @niktwazny303. ⟢ @outerbanksloverp4l ⟢ @slut4you ⟢ @maybanksgirl69 ⟢ @hstbsl06 ⟢ @percysley
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
206 notes · View notes
daydreamabout · 2 days ago
Text
A Deal with the Grumpy Officer [Tim Bradford Imagine]
Tumblr media
Summary: You find the perfect opportunity to leave a date.
Y/N sat in a booth at the small, local diner, stirring her drink absentmindedly. Derek, her date, was talking about his job, but her mind was elsewhere. She smiled politely and nodded in all the right places, but something felt off. The conversation was nice enough, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she wasn’t fully invested in it.
She glanced around the diner, hoping to distract herself, when her eyes landed on a familiar figure.
Tim Bradford.
Standing at the counter, holding a takeout bag and looking as unimpressed as ever. His blonde hair was a little messy and his tan looked like it had been freshly topped off. The t-shirt he wore—bright yellow with the word "Lakers" sprawled across it—stood out against his usual grumpy expression, giving him an almost comically serious air.
Y/N’s heart gave a little leap. She knew exactly what to do.
“Sorry, Derek,” Y/N interrupted him, her voice suddenly a bit too cheerful. “I think I need to leave. I, uh, just remembered I’ve got something I need to take care of.”
Derek blinked, looking caught off guard. “What? Already? But we were having a great time.”
Y/N’s lips twisted into an apologetic smile. “Yeah, but my ex is here, and I really don’t want to deal with it. He’s a bit... intense.”
“Your ex?” Derek looked confused, but Y/N didn’t wait for him to process. She gestured subtly toward Tim, who had just finished paying for his food and was heading toward the door.
Y/N leaned in close to Derek, trying her best to look embarrassed. “Yeah, he’s just over there. I don’t want to make it weird.”
Derek glanced over and noticed Tim—arms crossed, face stoic, staring at him like he could turn him to stone with just one look.
“Oh... uh, okay. Yeah, I get it,” Derek stammered, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “You should, uh... go take care of that then.”
Y/N nodded, already standing up. “I’ll text you later, okay? Thanks for understanding.”
Before Derek could say anything else, she quickly made her way toward Tim, feeling a little rush of adrenaline.
“Hey, Tim!” she called out, her voice unexpectedly chipper.
Tim glanced up, his grumpy demeanor softening slightly when he saw her. “Y/N? What’s up?”
She quickly lowered her voice, stepping closer to him. “I need your help,” she whispered. “I need you to play along. It’s for my... ex-boyfriend. He’s here, and I need you to pretend to be, well, him.”
Tim gave her a blank stare, but there was a flicker of amusement in his eyes. “You want me to pretend to be your angry ex?”
Y/N nodded frantically. “Please. I just need to get out of here, and he’s already looking at us.”
Tim sighed deeply, looking over at Derek, who was still sitting at the table, confused and nervous. “You owe me big time for this.”
“Deal,” she said quickly, glancing back at Derek. “Just make it look convincing.”
With a grunt of agreement, Tim walked past her, glaring in Derek’s direction as he passed. Y/N quickly followed him, turning back toward Derek with a resigned expression. “Sorry, but I’ve really got to go. He is being difficult and... you know how that goes.”
Derek’s eyes widened when he saw Tim, his arms crossed and his expression downright terrifying. “Wait, your... ex is that guy?”
Y/N nodded as casually as possible, taking a few steps back. “Yep, him. I should really go. I’ll text you later.”
Derek looked from her to Tim, then back to her. “Uh, okay... no problem. Take care.”
Without another word, she turned and quickly walked after Tim, not daring to look back at Derek. She couldn’t help the small grin that tugged at her lips as they stepped out of the diner and into the cool night air.
Tim didn’t say anything as they walked toward his car, his usual gruffness returning. He unlocked the door with a click and tossed the takeout bag into the passenger seat before getting in himself.
“So... what now?” he asked, clearly unimpressed by the situation.
Y/N slipped into the passenger seat, glancing over at the bag of food. “Well, I’d say we go somewhere comfortable.Maybe watch the Lakers game?” She shrugged casually, trying to sound lighthearted despite her nerves. “I mean, you’re already here and, well... I could use the distraction.”
Tim gave her a sidelong look but didn’t argue. “You really think I’m going to share my food with you?”
She grinned, reaching over and tugging the bag closer. “I’m sure you’ll be generous. After all, you’re the one doing me the favor.”
Tim rolled his eyes, but there was a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “This is the last time I help you out, you know.”
Y/N laughed, feeling a little more at ease now that they were both in the car. “Oh, that's what you said last time as well.”
---
The drive to Tim’s place was short.They were sitting on his couch, the game on in the background. The Lakers were playing their rivals and the tension in the room was palpable, but for once, Y/N wasn’t focused on the game. She was too busy stealing bites of Tim’s fries when he wasn’t looking, trying to ignore the way his presence was oddly comforting.
Tim’s focus was entirely on the TV, but every now and then, he’d glance at her and she could see the faint hint of a smile on his face.
“So, the Lakers, huh?” she said, taking a bite of his burger when he wasn’t paying attention.
Tim didn’t look at her but there was a dry edge to his voice. “Yeah, they’re not bad.”
“Not bad?” Y/N asked with mock disbelief. “They’re amazing, Tim! You’ve gotta be more invested than that.”
“Sure, sure. Amazing,” he muttered, shaking his head with a slight chuckle.
Y/N smiled to herself, watching the game for a bit, but then her gaze drifted to the take-out bag again. She couldn’t help but laugh quietly to herself. “You know, I’m pretty sure this isn’t how I expected my night to go.”
Tim glanced at her, his expression unchanging. “What, you didn’t think you’d be eating my fries and watching a game with me?”
“Definitely not.” She chuckled. “But I’m glad it turned out this way.”
Tim didn’t respond right away, but when he finally looked at her, there was something a little warmer in his gaze. “Yeah, me too.”
And just like that, the night stretched on in comfortable silence, the Lakers playing in the background as they shared food and time in each other's company. Despite everything, it was exactly what she needed.
104 notes · View notes
romerona · 2 days ago
Text
The swan Princess; Westeros Version.
Okay so, I can’t this out of my brain so just imagine this with me:
The reader-insert Targaryen Princess, the younger sister of Rhaenyra by about 16-17 years, and the second daughter of King Viserys and the late Queen Aemma x Lord Cregan Stark in a dynamic inspired by The Swan Princess.
Viserys and Rickon Stark arrange for the princess and Cregan to be wed once she comes of age. To build familiarity, they reunite them every few years (a rare moment of decency among men in House of the Dragon, but let's roll with it).
However, from a young age, they absolutely despise each other, setting the stage for a classic love-hate relationship.
Young fem Targ reader x young Cregan Stark.
Warnings: kids being kids.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The towering walls of Harrenhal surround you like sentinels, their dark history hidden beneath the banners of red and black for your name day celebration. It's your sixth name day, and the great hall is alive with music, laughter, and the scent of roasted meats. Nobles mill about in their finest, offering you warm smiles, expensive gifts and endless congratulations. You curtsy, thank them, and do all the things a proper princess should.
You’ve been told countless times how loved you are—how your bright smile and kind words can soften even the grumpiest lord. But the truth is, your feet ache from standing, your cheeks hurt from smiling, and you missed you sister Nyra, she couldn’t attend because she was about to give birth to her babe. You’re already planning your escape.
Your father’s voice pulls you from your thoughts.
“Come, sweetling,” King Viserys beckoned warmly, his hand resting gently on your shoulder. “There is someone I would have you meet.”
With his guiding presence, he led you across the hall to a man of imposing stature, his broad shoulders and solemn expression marking him unmistakably as a lord of the North—Lord Rickon Stark. Beside him stood a boy, perhaps a few years your elder, with a mane of dark curls and piercing grey eyes that seemed to observe the world with unnerving precision.
“Lord Stark, I trust your journey was swift and uneventful?” your father inquired with the easy grace of a king accustomed to courtesies.
Lord Rickon inclined his head in a deep bow, he straightened from his bow, his voice deep and steady, carrying the weight of northern formality.
“Your Grace, the journey was as kind as one could hope this time of year. The North sends its regards, and I am honored to stand in your presence once more. Thank you for the honor of hosting us.” He glanced at you and also bow, “May the princess’s name day bring joy to all who celebrate it.”
You smile politely, dipping into a curtsy. “Thank you, my lord. It’s a pleasure to meet you and your family.”
Rickon gestures to the boy at his side. “This is my son and heir, Cregan.”
Cregan steps forward, bowing stiffly. It’s obvious he’s not used to it. He’s taller than you expected, and there’s something about the way he holds himself that reminds you of the knights in your father’s court—serious, reserved, and trying far too hard to look older than he is.
“Princess,” he says in a deep, measured voice, “happy name day. I hope it has been a joyful celebration.”
You smile at him, tilting your head.
“Thank you, my lord. It has been lively.” Your tone is polite, but you can’t help teasing him a little. He seems so serious, like he’s never laughed a day in his life.
Your father turned to speak with Lord Rickin about something you honestly had no interest in. Instead you turn to the boy, the young Lord, Cregan Stark.
“Do you always speak like that?” you ask before you can stop yourself.
Cregan blinks, clearly taken aback. “Like what?”
“So formal,” you say with a grin. “Do you practice in front of a mirror?”
His ears turn red, but he doesn’t lose his composure. “It’s important to speak with respect,”
You’re about to tease him further when your father nudges you gently. You remember your manners and curtsy again, leaving Cregan to stare after you as you’re whisked away to greet the next guest.
Later that evening, after what feels like hours of endless conversation and feasting, you finally find your chance to slip away. The gardens outside Harrenhal are quiet and cool, a welcome escape from the noise of the hall. The moonlight dances on the fountains, and the scent of night-blooming flowers fills the air.
You’re wandering down a stone path when you spot him—Cregan Stark. He’s crouched under a tree, poking at the dirt with a stick.
“You’re not supposed to leave the hall,” you say, your sudden voice startling him.
He shoots to his feet, hastily brushing dirt off his tunic as though it might erase his guilt.
“Neither are you,” he counters, his tone careful yet edged with a hint of accusation.
You arch a brow, crossing your arms. “I’m the princess. I can do as I please.”
“That’s not true,” he retorts, his grey eyes narrowing as he mirrors your posture. “The king said the garden is off-limits.”
A sly smirk curls your lips, your lilac eyes gleaming with mischief. “Well, my father isn’t here, is he?”
Cregan’s frown deepens, his expression growing more serious. “If something happens to you, it’ll be my fault.”
Ignoring him, you take a step closer, letting your gaze drop to the stick he clutches. “What are you doing out here, anyway? Were you digging for treasure?”
His shoulders stiffen as he quickly moves the stick behind his back. “That’s none of your concern.”
Your grin widens, delighted at his discomfort. “So you were digging for something!”
“I wasn’t!” he insists, his ears tinged with a flush of embarrassment.
“Let me see,” you say, darting forward with a burst of energy and snatching the stick from his hand before he can react. You hold it aloft like a trophy, inspecting it with exaggerated curiosity. “What is this supposed to be?”
“It’s just a stick,” Cregan replies, his tone laced with exasperation, as if he couldn’t believe you were making such a fuss.
You tilt your head, pretending to examine it like it’s some ancient artifact. “Were you digging for dragon eggs? Gold, perhaps?”
His cheeks flush, and he glares at you. “Stop teasing me!”
But teasing him is far too entertaining to stop now. You smirk, twirling the stick.
“Or maybe you’re looking for a duel,” you say, taking a step back and mimicking a defensive stance you’d seen knights adopt in the courtyard during their sparring sessions.
Cregan raises an eyebrow at you, incredulous. “I’m not fighting a girl. And a princess, no less.”
You narrow your eyes at him, your grin growing wider. “Why not? Afraid, Stark?”
He bristles immediately, straightening his posture. “I am not afraid,”
“Really? Then prove it,” you challenge, tapping the stick against the ground like a knight preparing to strike.
Before he can respond, you jab the stick lightly at his side, making him jump. “Ow!”
You laugh as he lunges for the stick, easily sidestepping him.
“You're slow," you taunt, spinning the stick like you've seen the knights do.
It's far too big for your small hands, but you make it work, grinning all the while.
Cregan narrows his grey eyes, his jaw tightening.
"I'm not slow," he says, his voice low and deliberate.
"Prove it, then," you say with a smirk, backing away a step. "Show me what the great Stark of the north can do."
He hesitates, glancing down at the mud smudging his boots, as if weighing the consequences.
“It wouldn't be honorable," he says stiffly, his tone full of the self-importance you've come to expect from boys who think they're men.
You roll your eyes. "You're no fun, Stark. What's the point of being a lord if you can't even defend your honor from a girl with a stick?"
His cheeks flush redder. "It's not proper to fight a princess!"
"Then you'd better run," you say, raising the stick and charging at him.
Caught off guard, Cregan stumbles back, his hands flying up in defense.
“Stop that!" he growls, but you've already jabbed him lightly in the side.
"First blood!" you declare triumphantly, poking him again before he can react.
"That's enough!" he snaps, grabbing for the stick, but you dance out of reach, laughing all the while.
"Not until you admit l've bested you," you tease, circling him with the mock seriousness of a seasoned warrior.
"Never," he mutters, his brows drawing into a stormy line.
But you don’t stop. You jab him again, then again, each time with just enough force to make him flinch. His face turns red—not from pain, but from anger—and you can’t help but laugh at how easy it is to rile him up.
“That’s enough!” he snaps, lunging forward and grabbing for the stick. His sudden movement catches you off guard, and you stumble, the stick slipping from your grasp.
The two of you freeze for a moment, glaring at each other, breathing hard. Then, as if on cue, the tension explodes again, and the scuffle resumes, this time with both of you trying to wrestle control of the stick.
The tugging begins. You yank the stick one way, he pulls it back with equal force. The push and pull grows more intense with every second, the dirt beneath your feet slipping as you both struggle for control.
“Let go!” he growls through gritted teeth, his stance wide and firm.
“You let go!” you fire back, gripping the stick with all the determination of a dragon refusing to yield its hoard.
You yank the stick back with all the determination your small hands can muster, and Cregan pulls harder in retaliation. The scuffle becomes a tug-of-war, and with one final, unsteady pull, you both lose your footing.
You fall first, landing ungracefully on the grass. Thankfully, you’re spared the mud, but the same cannot be said for Cregan. He topples beside you, landing with a loud squelch in the wet muck.
For a moment, the garden is silent save for your uneven breaths. You push yourself up, brushing grass off your skirt, and glance at him. His tunic is streaked with mud, his hair tousled from the fall, and a dark streak smudges his cheek like a careless smear of war paint.
You press your lips together, trying to stifle it—but it’s no use. Laughter bursts out of you, uncontrollable and bright.
Cregan turns his head sharply, his grey eyes narrowing as he sits up stiffly.
“Why are you laughing?” His tone is formal, but there’s a sharp edge to it, his annoyance barely restrained.
You hold your sides, laughing harder at his expression.
“Because—” you manage between giggles, pointing at his face, “—because you look ridiculous! Like a pig in a mud pit!”
Cregan stiffens, his jaw tightening. “You are hardly in a position to jest, Princess. You’re the one sitting in the dirt!”
His words make you laugh even harder, and for a moment, it seems like he might let it go. But then his temper flares, and with deliberate precision, he scoops up a handful of mud.
Before you can react, the cold, wet clump splatters across the front of your gown. You gasp, your laughter replaced with sheer outrage gasp.
“You big brute!” you exclaim, rising to your knees. You scoop up your own handful of mud and hurl it back at him with all the righteous indignation of a wronged queen.
The mud hits his shoulder, leaving a dark smear on the fine fabric of his tunic. His eyes widen, and for a moment, he looks genuinely shocked. Then his lips press into a thin line, and he glares at you with all the gravity an eight-year-old can muster.
He grabs another handful of mud, flinging it with far more force this time. You shriek as it lands on your sleeve, and without hesitation, you retaliate.
The garden becomes your battleground. Mud flies through the air as you dodge and lunge, your giggles ringing out as Cregan growls in frustration. He tries to maintain his formality even as he hurls clumps of dirt at you.
“Your behavior is unbefitting of a princess!” he calls, though the mud streaking his face makes him look anything but dignified.
“And yours is no better for a lord!” you reply gleefully, tossing another clump that narrowly misses him.
By the time your attendants arrive, the scene they stumble upon is one of complete chaos. You’re both caked in mud from head to toe, your gown a ruined mess, and his tunic utterly unrecognizable.
“Your highness!” one of your handmaidens exclaims, rushing forward. “What in the name of the Seven happened here?”
“She attacked me!” Cregan says immediately, straightening his posture despite the mud dripping from his hair.
“You threw the first mud!” you counter, pointing at him with a haughty tilt of your chin.
The attendants exchange exasperated looks as they pull you both to your feet, fussing over the state of your clothes and muttering about what your fathers will say when they see this.
142 notes · View notes
gotham-daydreams · 13 hours ago
Text
Writhing
Tumblr media
Day 4 {Challenge Masterlist}
A day away. The end is near, but they get closer. Too close.
[Yandere Batfam x Gender Neutral! Cop Reader]
[Warnings: Mentions of suicide (only mentioned in dialog), cult, occult like activities, rituals, implied human sacrifice (in dialog), sort of implied gore?, body horror, violence, blood (minor), bodily fluids (minor), flesh, general mild gore, gross description (?).] (Note: Unless otherwise specified, it's to be believed that actions involved with harming, hurting, or heavily injuring the self are not talking about the Batfamily or the reader. Still, you have been warned.)
Oops! A little late on this one, my bad! Body horror elements come in at the end of the chapter, when Selina says something to Bruce. It's over when Jason says "Thank god, he finally shut up-"
If there is such things as 'partial'/'soft' dead dove, that's how I would describe the end of this day.
-------------------------------
The day is hotter than it’s ever been for fall in Gotham, and nearly everyone could feel it. Yet, strangely enough, a noticeable amount of people seem perfectly fine with it – even if some are practically sweating in their clothes, they still go about their lives almost scarily unbothered.
Most would think that Duke would be complaining, or at the very least breaking a sweat with how long he’s been in his suit, but strangely enough, he feels comfortable like this. Almost content, but he couldn’t be – not while being so far away from you. A window was the only thing truly separating you from him, but he couldn’t bring himself to open it and slip in. Almost like something deep inside of him was telling him you wouldn’t like it if he did, and Duke couldn’t understand why. You’ve been so nice to him up until this point, so welcoming – so you wouldn’t mind if he popped in extra early, would you? Sure you wouldn’t, Duke couldn’t imagine if you did, but he’s sure you’d understand anyway. If only he could explain it to you. Explain how he’s been feeling and that he had to be inside. Then you’d understand, forgive him, and everything would be okay.
Yet, something was still keeping him out, and it was honestly getting on his last nerve.
How Duke managed to slip out of the Batcave didn’t matter – not like he remembered, anyway. What mattered was figuring what was keeping him out so he could get in-
The young vigilante watches as you slowly, almost painstakingly begin to rise from your bed to sit up. For a moment, he holds his breath, hoping and nearly pleading with all his heart that you’re awake – only to see that your eyes are still closed, and it’s still hours away from when you’d usually be up. The only difference being is that your body moved in accordance to the sun, and you rose as it did. Almost as if you two were in sync somehow, and Duke couldn’t help but find that endlessly interesting instead of strange.
Even so, he had hoped you would have actually been awake – but he could be polite, so he waited. It wasn’t very comfortable being perched on the fire escape like this, but for something like this? Duke didn’t mind, especially not when he got to spend so much time with you. When it was just the two of you, alone, together.
Duke couldn’t even feel himself sweating in his suit, but even if he could – he didn’t care. He couldn’t. Not with you in his sights.
Time passed by like sand slipping through his hands, with only the smallest bits remaining under Duke’s nails and in the lines of his palm. Since he could feel it pass, albeit faintly, and could acknowledge its passing as well, but the actual length was lost on him – as if only minutes or seconds had flown by in the place of the few hours that escaped his memory.
Not that it mattered, as once Duke saw you begin to stir and wake up, he couldn’t help but feel all giddy as he practically jumped to your window sill, and tapped on the window despite the nagging feeling that tried to stop him. He watches as you rub your eyes before glancing over to him.
Another feeling washes over Duke, one of denial – and he finds himself panicking. You had to let him in. You would, right? You wouldn’t turn him away, would you? You couldn’t leave him out in the heat like this, you had come here for you. You can’t turn him away. No. No Duke can’t accept this – who are you? Where did you go? Did someone replace you? Was this a fake? Just what was going on-
The young vigilante’s thoughts are cut off as you open the window. “What’re you doing here, kid? I don’t remember making a call… unless there’s some trouble nearby?” Duke almost forgot he was in the suit, and he almost wanted to rip it off now, but he managed to keep it on… even if he suddenly felt like he couldn’t breathe despite how his own cowl was designed. Thank god, you were fine. Normal.
“I was just on patrol and, uh, decided to swing by? See how things are going, especially with all the activity around in the city as of late–” Duke is quick to reply, clearing his throat before admitting. “And I just wanted to see how you’re doing, y’know? Can’t imagine that things have been exactly easy these past few nights.”
You raise a brow, but just sigh and shake your head at his words. “Well, I appreciate the thought, but I got to get on with my morning, Signal.”
“I- I know! I just wanted to… do a search.”
“A… search?”
“Yeah, like- do you have any plants or anything around here?”
“Well, yes-”
“Perfect! Gotta check them and make sure they’re all good and healthy. It shouldn’t take long, and I won’t get in the way of anything, I promise!”
You can only raise a brow, but eventually relent and give a tired but amused, “Fine, do what you have to, then.”
So, you go on with your morning. Just getting ready, and keeping an eye on Duke – especially as he tries to make conversation. Nothing too out of the ordinary, but considering where you’re supposed to be standing, it is odd. Though, it only made you feel better as you decided to entertain him a little. Answering his questions, holding the position you’ve managed to maintain for the past few days, and keeping up appearances. It was easier during the day for countless reasons, a good night’s rest being one of them. Staying up was really taking a toll, and you needed your energy for what’s to come.
Nevertheless, it quickly comes to a point where Duke is obviously trying to stay, and you can’t figure out why. You feel like you’ve dropped enough hints at this rate, and so you try to confront him about it gently… only for him to stumble over his words and struggle to speak for whatever reason. It’s honestly a little frustrating, but you can work with this. You’ve dealt with worse than a clingy kid in a costume.
So, putting on a more natural smile as you remember to compose yourself, you make the same offer that’s always worked for you time and time again.
“Say, why don’t we have a bit of breakfast?”
— — — – — – — — — — — —
Barbara was beginning to regret taking Dick’s advice on getting some air, especially now that she was a few ways away from the only useful computer they could use at the moment. She appreciated the effort, but given the countdown and the list of questions they still have to answer – well, they didn’t exactly have a lot of time for a break.
Still, it was nice getting out of the clock tower for a bit. That much Barbara could agree with, even if it was strangely hot for fall… it couldn’t be the work of another villain, could it? They had their hands full enough as it is, and this cult wasn’t helping with that – not to mention the fact they didn’t know if it was just that.
“Ugh, why’s it so warm? I don’t remember fall being this hot.. did the news even mention something like this?”
Dick hums for a moment, and gives a shrug as they continue down the street, “Hm, I don’t think so! Just said something about today being nice?” He snickers slightly, “A little ironic, huh? It’s almost like they’re trying to downplay it! But who knows? Maybe they don’t even notice!”
Barbara can only huff in response, “How can they not? It’s almost like spring out here, or even summer, honestly-”
[“Oracle, focus.” Bruce’s voice so rudely pierces through the moment.]
“I would be if someone hadn’t taken me out.”
“Hey! It’s not a crime to get some fresh air every once in a while! Especially when on a tough, grueling case like this… you know that if we keep going at it with no breaks, we’ll all drop before that countdown even finishes.” Dick tries to defend himself, and Bruce at least acknowledges his point by staying silent – the only sign of him still being on the line being a gruff exhale he lets out.
Barbara just shakes her head and rolls her eyes, not bothering with a response as she waves off Dick’s words and usual antics. Though, it was a nice change of pace compared to how the last few nights have been – even if they somehow managed to avoid any more deaths last night. Tragedy was to be expected in their line of work, and Gotham’s reputation only made that more apparent, but this was… something else. It didn’t feel like they were any closer to figuring out the answers to questions they had even at the start of all this, or only had half of a possible answer. Like how they knew the other groups Clark was able to track are heading towards major cities, but they still didn’t know why aside from the Red Dawn you had mentioned.
At this point, it almost felt like a goose chase! And if they didn’t get anything concrete fast, who knows what could happen-?
“... Hey, what’s with all the people in front of that book store?” Barbara points out as she taps Dick’s shoulder, grabbing the officer’s attention.
Humming, he looks over to where Barbara was gesturing towards, and shrugs. “Who knows? Maybe there’s a sale or something? Some famous person released a new volume?” The very idea nearly makes her laugh, and as much as Barbara wants to – she’s getting a weird feeling about it. Like something important was going on over there, and that she had to check it out now.
“Well, it couldn’t hurt to check it out, right?” She suggests, only for Dick to remain where he was, which only now she realizes that they’ve stopped moving all together. Huh, when did that happen?
Nevertheless, Dick gives the shop a once over, his eyes narrowing slightly at the crowd that’s formed in front of it, and is continuing to grow as the seconds pass. Some still walk past, and seem to mind their own business – but for some reason, others seem drawn to it like a moth to a flame, and there could be only one explanation for it.
“Nah, I think we’ll be fine right here.” He says, sounding almost a little too sure of himself.
Barbara raises a brow and looks over to Dick, curious but also a bit annoyed for reasons even she can’t place. “Why do you think that-?”
Before she can even finish, you come strolling out from the alley just a few inches ahead of them, and Barbara blinks in slight surprise. What were you doing awake-?
“Hey, [Last Name]!” Dick greets without missing a beat, an odd sort of smile making its way across his face. “Where were you last night?”
You look over to him, blinking as well before straightening yourself out. “Oh! Officer Grayson, what a surprise… and Ms. Gordon? What are you both doing out?”
Barbara’s brows furrow, but before she could speak up, Dick spoke up again. “I asked you first, [Last Name]. Where have you been? I can’t imagine you’d take the night off in the middle of a serious situation.”
“I’m… sorry, but something had come up- and I apologize, but I don’t remember anyone mentioning you looking for me?”
“So you were on duty last night-?”
Barbara nudges Dick’s arm, “I’m sorry for my friend here, you’re one of the officers that came in from Metropolis, right?" She interrupts, surprising you a little more. Though, you take the opportunity and give a nod, offering a hand - one that Dick eyes before looking back at you.
Not once does he even attempt to glance at his supposed ally.
"Yes! Officer [Last Name] at your service, ma'am. It's been an honor working with your father."
Barbara nods, taking your hand... which gives her an oddly tingly feeling. One that makes the hairs on her arm stand, but she hardly notices. "Really? Well, I wouldn't get too used to that - wouldn't want to stay in Gotham for longer then you'd have to, right?" She laughs lightly, "I hope the city hasn't been too much of a handful, Officer."
"Oh, there's no need for that, Gordon! Everything's gone... well, as good as it can. We're doing all we can to resolve things as quickly as possible- I assure you." You try to reassure, and while Barbara appreciates the effort - she was still getting the funniest feeling that you were down playing the situation too much. To say you were calm felt like an understatement, you're more laid-back then anything, and for a case like this? That didn't feel like a good thing.
Still, she plays along as well. "Is that so? Then is there anything you know about the case?"
"Well, I don't think we know more then the commissioner's friend per say, but the detective's coming in later and-"
"Wait, the detective-?"
It's only then that you notice something, and already try to take your leave.
"I really wish we had more time to discuss! But I must be going now, please forgive me, Gordon- ah, and of course you, Grayson."
"[Last Name]-!"
Dick's plea is swallowed by the sizable crowd that passes them, and almost seems to go in the direction you were headed in. Yet, when trying to catch a glimpse of you - you're nowhere to be found.
Folding his hands into fists, Dick's nails dig into his palms - something he doesn't even seem to notice or feel. "Damn it." He curses under his breath. So much for that, now he'll have to-
"What was that about?" Barbara can't help but ask out loud, looking at the crowd that was already disappearing before glancing up at Dick. The expression he wore making her worried, and she reached out a hand. "Hey, you okay?"
He shakes it off, and just gives a nod, smile strained. "Just peachy, Babs."
Again, before Barbara could another word out - her phone buzzes, and it's only then that she realizes her commlink was disconnected for... whatever reason? Nevertheless, she picks it up, and tries to gesture to Dick that they should go, which... takes a while. Almost too long, considering how they've got less then twenty-four hours left on that countdown.
Selina's on the line, and she and Barbara try to figure out what they can - and Barbara can't exactly place it, but it feels like only her and Selina are even somewhat level headed. It makes no sense, and she doesn't have time to dwell on it, so Barbara just pushes it to the side for now.
Somehow, they're still having trouble getting the Batcomputer up and running, so Tim and the samples are going to be at the clock tower for the time being so they can continue to work despite the 'hiccup'. Until nightfall comes, Bruce is looking into what he can while trying to get the Batcomputer even semi-functional, and is talking with everyone he can, sharing all the information they have at the moment - trying to see if anyone else knows something they don't.
Meanwhile the other's seem to be doing... something. What exactly? No one's totally sure, but considering the time they've got left? Well, they can only assume it's something useful.
Which... made Barbara remember something just as the call ended. Sighing, she just sits back as her wheelchair continues down the sidewalk. "Where even is Duke, anyway? I can't believe he managed to slip past everyone before his patrol... and before we could come up with a plan too." She can't help but grumble, but really only hoped the kid was okay.
Dick, who had been quiet even since they turned back around - let his silence linger for a moment longer, as if thinking before responding. "Something tells me he's on patrol."
Barbara glances at Dick once more, "Oh yeah? And how can you figure that out when he left without his phone and commlink somehow?" 
Dick only gives a smile, one that Barbara had never seen before that gives her... mixed emotions at best. His eyes closed, and though the rays of sun only made him look better, Barbara couldn't deny the way his heart paused at the sight. What kind of smile even is that-?
"I've just got a really good feeling. So let's go back to the tower, m'kay?"
For once, the chirp in Dick's tone did little to ease Barbara's sudden feeling of dread. One that all too quickly turned into something similar to comfort, and she couldn't even fathom why.
— — — — — — — — — —
Before the moon even has the chance to fully rise, a certain mishmash family of vigilantes is still hard at work. Whatever a few of the others were working on in the batcave, Duke joined them the moment he got home - but after his suit was put aside, and practically put on quarantine with how much of the red stuff it had on it. It was like sand and had gotten into every small crevasse it could - and not just in the suit.
When asked about it, Duke just didn't know. Claiming he didn't remember even losing the suit, but knew he had it on this morning because - well, why wouldn't he? The questioning seemed to confuse him as much as everyone else, and Dick eventually put a stop to it... strangely enough.
Nevertheless, Tim was able to find a bit more information, and when asked he simply said, "Well, I don't think it'll help us right now but... these guys- the group, at least- has been around for a while now. Not like Ancient Egyptians or anything, but they've definitely been around longer than just a few months. It's hard to pinpoint when they were exactly formed or founded, but I'll give it a few years. Maybe even decades."
Chipping in, Barbara adds, "They've got their hands in just about anything you can imagine. It's hard to tie them to politics, but they've got banks, industries, and so on that have supported various churches that are around some of the areas Clark marked before... well, the black out last night. Thank god a backup was sent to the Clock Tower's database."
Tim hums in agreement, "Exactly. And, to add on to that- but even some businesses have given to a few of these churches or groups, but most seem to have their own way of spreading... whatever this is. Though, if only certain banks from these companies support the 'cause', or the company itself supports it is harder to figure out."
"Again, not super helpful, but definitely gives a better idea of who these guys are. Wouldn't be surprised if for most, this is a legitimate religion disguised as another."
Well, Tim was right - it didn't help them immediately, but it gave a bit of insight. These guys have been around for a while, but now the question is why they're popping up now, and if it's because of this 'Red Dawn', then they absolutely have to find out what that means before time is up. However, amongst the investigation, another question eventually pops up, and one that almost feels foolish to skip over.
Where are the bodies from the people who were involved with this cult, but ended up killing themselves when caught-?
Then, Bruce's phone rings just as he's about to contact Gordon. It's not a number he recognizes, but something, for some reason not even he can explain, compels him to pick it up.
Before Bruce himself can even try to resist, the button is already pressed.
[The person on the other end clears their throat before speaking. “Hello? This is Detective Greenwood, and to my understanding, this is Batman’s number?”]
Of course, naturally, Bruce doesn’t say anything. More or less just… confused. Was this even real? How could anyone expect him to believe that the detective that’s been absent for nearly four days, maybe even longer, is only now trying to show up? Talk about convenience. Not to mention priorities and dedication.
[The man on the other end sighs. “Well, if this is the right number or not, I’ll find out soon enough. I’ve heard you're not exactly a patient man, so I’ll keep this short- just for you. Meet me at the diner on fifth. It’s getting late, I know. Place is about to close, but I’ll be here until it does. If it’s closed when you decide to come by? I’ll be at the station, cleaning up the mess.” A beat of silence passes, and a small clinking sound could be heard before he adds, “I’m sure you’re aware we don’t have much time, but hey. The choice is yours.”]
With that, the call ends, and Bruce is momentarily left in silence. Everyone else is doing their own thing and trying to figure out a plan of action they all agree upon but this… this could change things – but that all depends on what this detective knows. The timing itself is a little more than suspicious, and while you had apparently mentioned the detective’s arrival earlier, being gone for so long, and during a time like this no less… almost nothing could make Bruce any less trusting of this. While he trusted your credibility somewhat – and that’s mostly due to Clark being able to back up the information you’ve been able to provide thus far – there’s no telling if this detective had any new information they haven’t figured out already.
… Yet with the time they have, and their lack of knowledge of what it even means, they didn’t exactly have the time to be nitpicky – and though it was highly unlikely, having someone explain or give a clue as to what this ‘Red Dawn’ even is would also be useful.
A rough sigh escapes Bruce, and from that alone, the room goes quiet. Glancing at the timer on the holographic screen of the Batcomputer, he takes a second or so before getting to work. “Dick, you’re coming with me to see this… detective. Selina, go with Damian to see where the bodies are. Jason and Cassandra? …Don’t follow too close behind.” They didn’t exactly have time to argue, and with Duke, Stephanie, and Tim doing something else? This’ll have to do.
Regardless, even if some disagreements and such are made, they all set out, and into the unforgiving city once again.
Knowing the area like the back of your hand certainly had its perks, and finding the diner itself isn’t very hard. Though before they can even think about stepping inside, the sheer emptiness inside the establishment is… not one any of them are familiar with. Not during a time like this, and especially not when there’s a bar inside the establishment. To say they’d stand out would be putting it nicely, but the invitation is already given once the single patron in the diner notices the only two visible figures outside and for them to come in.
Playing along never feels good, but what choice do they have? Besides, as if knowing something, Dick is the one that takes the first step forward. Bruce slides into the booth last.
Conversation sparks up, and it goes about as well as one would expect. The obvious questions are asked, but nothing notable or of any real importance is given. Greenwood only apologizes for his absence, gives little reasoning for it aside from ‘being caught up with something’ – as that’s something noteworthy, and yet not even Bruce has been informed of it. So, things are off to a great start.
Almost seemingly out of habit, Greenwood offers anything he can, only to be declined – something he just shrugs off before taking a stip of his coffee, or what looks to be something like it, as despite the hint of color Bruce swears he can see in the mug, it’s too dark to be much else. Still, all too aware of the time limit they’re working on, Bruce gets straight to the point, and Greenwood follows right along. As if to ease things, he even offers for the pair to call him John. Hm. That’s the first name he’s gotten out of the new batch without looking through records.
Strangely enough, Greenwood takes the time to even reassure them, saying of the waiter – the only employee visible at the moment, is blind. So they won’t have to worry about anyone spreading any rumors about seeing the Big Bat and Nightwing themselves in a diner late at night. When Dick remarks about passerbys, Greenwood only says, “A friend of mine’s got that handled.”
When Bruce understandably asks, “And who is this ‘friend’ of yours.”
Greenwood strangely responds with, “Well, I can’t say much for a list of reasons. But they’ve got a way with people, and even got me your number. That’s all you’ve got to know.” Pushing up the shades he wore all the while. There was no need for him, but the detective never made a move to take them off. Like they were a part of him.
To say the conversation got any more useful from there would be a lie. Greenwood treats it too casually, almost infuriatingly so considering the situation they’re in, but Bruce is able to remain patient despite it all, and Dick looks like he’s biting his tongue. Though, as if catching wind of this, the detective decides to finally move things in a meaningful direction, and offers for them to head to the station – which is conveniently when the diner was about a minute or so away from closing. Which, Bruce takes notice of how Greenwood pays as they move to stand. A Rose Bank card, huh? That’s… new.
Even as both vigilantes readily take the opportunity to meet the detective at the station, and in his office, the quietness at the city gnaws at Bruce.
Of course it bothers him more than he’ll ever let on, but it gets to him all the same. It doesn’t help that Bruce can’t explain it, but the silence itself feels like a taunt of sorts. Like a jab at him specifically – a show of how in all his years of being Batman and trying to look after this city for as long as he has, it’s only now, under mysterious circumstances and in the midst of this disaster of a situation, is the city finally quiet. Even if it’s not in the way Bruce wants it to be. Especially since it’s not the way Bruce would have wanted it to be.
Whoever’s behind this has got a real funny sense of humor, Bruce will give them that.
… Eventually, Greenwood reappears and greets the pair – seemingly unfazed by the fact that they’re already in his office, even if he does make a show of acting a little shocked. Hm.
“I assume you’ve gone through the files I’ve had out already?” It’s a promising start, at least. Especially when compared to being offered coffee just moments before.
Still, Bruce just narrows his eyes, and Dick remains… oddly quiet – something that’s starting to make Bruce question if he made the right choice with bringing him along. Though, there’s no time for regrets now, is there? “Among other things. Your investigation has been…”
“Confusing? Nonsensical? Well… I can’t really blame you there. Everything dealing with them seems odd at best. Alien, perhaps, at worst.”
Bruce raises a brow under the cowl, only for them to furrow a second after. “Alien?”
Greenwood nods, “Put simply, yes. Some of the rituals performed by this group in the past have made little to no sense, and can vary in… well, intensity, so to speak. I’m sure you’ve heard about what happened the other day? It’s unfortunate and upsetting, yes- but it does tie into a theme this group seems to exhibit with everything they do.” Opening a file, he lays it out on the table, and the pictures shown are not for the faint of heart. To even say they were grotesque is putting it lightly. “Sacrifice.”
“... The human sacrifice kind?” Dick asks, but for a strange reason, Bruce already gets the feeling his son knows the answer – something that only makes him more unsure of all this, even if, strangely enough, a part of him is starting to almost accept it?
Regardless, Greenwood shakes his head. “Not quite, even if I don’t blame you for jumping to that straight away. Their version of sacrifice seems more… personal, or at least to differ greatly depending on the ritual. It’s hard to say what people are making these sacrifices for- but if you’ve talked with anyone who may be in this group, their reasons tend to differ. Like they were all promised something that caters to them specifically, and thus whatever it is, through these rituals- they are making the necessary sacrifice for it. Such as their eyes, legs, arms, heart, soul-”
“Life.” Bruce finishes, and Greenwood nods. Though, with all of this, only one question seems obvious. “How does the head of the group even know what someone would be willing to make such big sacrifices for? Especially if they’re all personalized.”
“That’s where the weird part comes in, since… well, in all my time as a detective working on this case- I haven’t been able to figure that out. At a certain point, they seem to just know.”
Bruce’s brows further knit together, and his eyes narrow further, “That doesn’t make any sense-”
[“Hey~ Bats? Yeah… you know those bodies you had me and the kid snoop around for-? Which, you owe me big time for this, just fyi.” Selina’s voice rings through the commlink.]
Bruce pauses, left staring at Greenwood while Dick glances at him. The detective raises a brow.
[“Well, we’ve only got a couple of empty caskets from the couple of thugs that were from Gotham, just a bunch of that weird powder you’ve been obsessing over.” There’s a brief pause before she adds, “Kid thinks this is how they make the stuff. If so, with all the followers they have, and assuming they’re just as ‘devoted’ as the one’s we’re looking for? I think we’re way in over our heads here, B.”]
The vigilante didn’t even get a chance to respond, as an odd smirk grew on Greenwood’s face. “That’s the signal, huh? Damn, and here I thought I’d get a few more minutes in. Such a shame, you folk are really on top of things. Reminds me a bit of myself in my earlier days, honestly.” A sickening pop sounds, followed by the sickening echo of cracks and grinding bones as John’s arm extends unnaturally long.
His fingers become as thin as pencil tips, only to get filled as some sort of mass builds from the inside, and grows so large it strains the skin until it pops. Strings of nerves try to reconnect where they shouldn’t, muscle moves to almost reconstruct a stronger, larger arm - with bits of left over skin and flesh moving with it. Nothing ever stops moving, like it can’t ever settle in one spot, and the sheer mass of it all can be seen moving and writhing under John’s skin. Trying to spread itself over parts of his body with its gift.
Finally, he removes his shades, and reveals irises with a pale star pattern that shouldn’t be possible. Something that flickers and moves, with the sclera pulsating with prominent, red veins that only seem to be itching their way closer to the iris with each growth of flesh his body manages to create and sustain. Like a parasite itching to feed, and having been left to starve, it latches onto the side of his face, and practically devours his eye lid - revealing the muscle underneath, and using the mass of the skin to add to the muscular arm – which can hardly hold itself at the end, and comes undone in a pile of fleshy, squelching tendrils that wiggle and inch towards the heroes.
“Well, it’s as they say.” John chuckles, voice already breaking apart, and already beginning to sound wrong in every way. “It’s parents who make the ultimate sacrifice for their children.”
With that, the amalgamation of flesh in human form vaults over the desk, and grins as it launches itself forward, ”IT'S TIME FOR ME TO SEE MY LITTLE GIRL! You surely understand, don’t you, Man of BATS?!” A giggle in too high of a pitch escapes it, and more teeth could be seen peeking out from its gums.
Bruce and Dick are quick to dodge out of the way, and Cassandra is quick to use her cloak to cut all the lights in the station, but the office itself is left in a darkness only the blackness of space could replicate. Jason quickly jumps in, and the four get to work to subdue the creature.
The fight itself is a gross sight for numerous reasons. Acid is spit from the bellows of the organism's stomach, and yet sticks to any surface like a thick layer of pus. The flesh that makes up its arm travels along the body it now puppets, and tries to grab and become a part of all who come into contact with it. Even as shots and countless blows are done to it, all it does is laugh as it continuously launches itself forward haphazardly – as if chasing some sort of high. The fat of the torso is taken for tendrils that shoot out of its back and more flesh to enhance its own combat ability. The muscle and bone of the legs is consumed to enlarge the ribs and spine - making a whole other mouth that’s all bone and made vertically come out of it, and where the organs have moved to? Who’s to say.
Even as it’s thrown through the glass of the office, and the scratches make the thing bleed, it moves to stand and continue the fight – as if it can’t feel anything else, or, rather, it’s so focused on chasing that it’s able to ignore the pain? It’s hard to say, but laughs begin to mix with shrieking screams that ripped its throat and ruptured the stomach.
It was all messy, sloppy, and at some point, most were rushing to find a means to light it on fire – and when the opportunity came in the boiler room, and the most unlikely of them flicked the match as he tried to catch his breath? The nightmare refused to go down without the last say, despite never being given such a luxury.
“IT’S TOO LATE! THE NEW DAWN IS BOUND TO RISE, AND ONCE IT DOES WE WILL ALL BE REWARDED!! THE SUN, DRESSED IN RED SEES ALL, AND NOTHING CAN STOP IT! ALL PREPARATIONS HAVE ALREADY BEEN MADE! THE WATERS ARE BOILING! THOSE NOT AWAKENED WILL SEE! THE CHILDREN WILL SING ONCE AGAIN! AHAHA! THE EARTH COULD STOP ON ITS AXIS AND IT WOULDN’T STOP THE RE-”
Only for its violating, cries of praise to its lord and religion to swiftly be cut off by nothing but a bullet to its melting head that's flesh was tearing away at the skull of the human that once remained underneath.
“Thank god, he finally shut up-” Jason scoffed, only to cough as the smoke began to rise and he rushed out – following the others.
Outside of the station, they all tried to catch their breath. Beaten one way or another, but alive, and untouched. Still human, in spite of everything, and breathing through their own healthy lungs that weren’t nearly pulsating out of their chests.
The quiet streets remain, leaving only them. Yet, it didn’t seem to bother them now. They almost don’t notice it, and despite no words being spoken, they all come to a collective understanding.
When the commlink crackles to life, Bruce hardly reacts, and when he hears his youngest son’s voice – he feels like he knows everything just before he speaks.
[“Father?”]
“Yes… we understand now, too.” So, with this new information, and more being fed to them, they all head back home together. Now knowing what must be done, even without all the pieces put together. Almost as if, in a way, they just know now. Like something is telling them, and the more it gives. The more they need it.
The waters of the Earth begin to boil as it prepares to cry, one last time.
76 notes · View notes
quarterlifekitty · 1 day ago
Note
Sliding into your dms because your pretending to be a man idea got into my brain and won't leave me alone. We'll have to suffer together okay.
Imagine you're a daughter of some lowly destitute baron, he died and now all you have is a house and your brother, Alex. You have to sell the house because your father had debt that hasn't been settled. Luckily, you'll still have money left from the sale. Unluckily, the money is not much. You can either use it to send Alex to the royal academy or you can use it as your marriage dowry, of which your prospect isn't great anyway since you're poor and barely even a noble. Alex wants you to use the money, he's long been disillusioned with the king (Shepherd) and he wants to go help the neighbouring kingdom fight off their invader. He'll sleep easier knowing you have a roof over your head. Still, the thought of being married to some strange old men makes you want to throw up. You think you'd rather die. But you also don't want to stop Alex from pursuing his dream. So you and Alex came up with the idea that will satisfy you both: you will take his place in the royal academy and he can leave in peace, knowing you'll be safer in the academy than alone without a house in the countryside. He'll tell people that he's sent you to live with some distant relatives somewhere.
Years pass and you thrive in the academy. You graduate and despite having no connections or wealth, your capability lands you a job inside the palace. It's nothing fancy, and likely you won't go very far working under a neglected concubine, but she's very nice and funny. The salary is also good enough that you think if you keep working for a few years you can buy a small house and retire back to the countryside. Maybe you'll even stay longer just to accompany your mistress.
All in all, life is nice and uneventful. The great nobles and the king might be fighting, but you and your mistress are so far down the political ladder it barely affects you. Or so you thought and so it should have been, if not for your mistress starting a genuine love affair with Marchioness Laswell.
Your mistress' affection for you causes Laswell to pay attention to you. And unfortunately for you, she's seen the real Alex before. She knows you're a fraud. You think you're done for, but Laswell says she understands why you do it. She says she won't let the public learn your secret.
And she doesn't, because Duke Price isn't the public. He's just a Duke in desperate need of a wife. Someone to help him escape the disadvantageous match that will only put him under Shepherd's control once more. What a good luck he has to meet you, a noble who is unaffiliated with king, at this exact time. Surely you'll be willing to help him out? Being a duchess is certainly better than pretending to be a guy. It's definitely less risky, he says. Do you know that using someone else's identity can get you to jail? What if the king finds out and thinks you're plotting treason? Off with your pretty little head then. Surely being his duchess would be safer. He'll protect you. Take care of you. Spoil you, even. You and your good birthing hips and however many kids you two will have.
TLDR, you pretend to be a guy to escape marrying strange old men only to marry another (worse) strange old man
So first of all. I LOVE THIS. And now for my paltry additions….
I think that once Price found out about you, he became extremely fixated for a number of reasons. One? He’d met you before. He visited the academy as an alumni, occasionally donated to the institute, and would visit to check on the allocation of those funds.
And he remembers seeing you, swimming in your too-large uniform. Absolutely decimating your studies. In his observation of the academy, he’d unwittingly found himself following you around to your different lessons and seeing you sweep the floor with every other student. It was clear you were extremely bright, and he heard the whisperings about you.
A shame about your lowly birth. You might’ve made a fine tactician.
Price, as a rather meritocratic man, wanted to have you in his service as soon as you graduated. But as with many of the finest things in the kingdom, you were plucked up and handed off as something of a present to one of the king’s newer, shinier consorts.
So when Laswell starts her dalliance with that very consort, it sparks a memory in Price. And he asks after you. Which gets Laswell to commit you more to memory when she meets with you. And suddenly it’s quite obvious. She tells Price all about it, with amusement on her face, at one of their weekly meetings.
Suddenly there’s a little click in his brain. Like everything’s slotting into place. He was denied you once, in one way, and it won’t happen again. Now he can have you in all ways. With the forces at his disposal, and your brilliance in tactics and writing, he may well have the makings of some serious political sabotage. With him as your husband, you could soar in a way your class and gender never would’ve allowed. And at the end of it all? You’re quite pretty. A new dress and a circlet for that boyish cut of hair and you’d be bewitching. He was eager to see what those loose tunics had been hiding.
You can’t refuse his offer. Suddenly, Alex is called by letter to care for an ailing relative who has no other means of support. The same relative that had supposedly taken you in. And John quite selflessly takes you in following, and from a public perspective, it all went so naturally after that. What could be more heartwarming and dreamy? A generous noble taking in a common born girl in an act of charity, and the two falling in love, enough to defy the gaps in their stations and marry. It’s the kind of thing that only happens in fairy tales.
But despite all of John’s political aspirations, he knows it must appear as if nothing is amiss. That means doing what any noble would do with a young, pretty bride. It means spoiling you with all the finery he can… and it means making sure that you’re with child within the year.
56 notes · View notes
danielcain · 2 days ago
Text
No Quadrupeds Left
It was not out of the ordinary for children to possess both a pathological fear and an insatiable obsession with the four-legged Beasts of the past. The pre-Vanishing ecosystem was seldom spoken of, and only in hushed tones.
Sometimes, if an older relative grew drunk enough to feel absolved for any improper remarks, a certain sense of dark humor kept the topic tolerable, and children would ask questions about the Beasts. It was rare enough an occurrence, normally suited to post-festival gatherings. One drunkard, oft battle-scarred, slurring a diatribe about trading Beasthide as little cousins sit attentive, hugging grass-stained knees to their enraptured hearts.
‘Uncle, what of the Beasts that didn’t vanish, those who were already meat or leather?’
‘Yes, yes! Did we bury them? Did we give them rites? What sort of rites befit a Beast?’
‘Children, children, your dear old uncle has had too much wine and fermented fish. I shall answer in the morning, I shall regale it to thee you plainly, as my grandfather regaled it to me.’
Of course, when the morningdove crowed, the family’s children would find rolled-up cots and the sound of grownfolk arguing over missing silverware, no sobered-up old soldier in sight.
Reader, Next time you find yourself in the Crescent, go to a tavern. A nice one, don’t get yourself slashed. The kind full of young grownfolk, 20 winters or older. As them about ‘the Vanishing Uncle’. It has become somewhat of an archetype to the natives, much like the linen-silk trickster of the East, or the bruin-hugging Gaul. Do take care who you say this to, some don’t admire the bravado.
We all knew him, or knew someone who knew him. Everyone had a story of irresponsibility and embellishment. When speaking of this sort of man, we would preface: “Now, these are the thoughts of a distant uncle, not I…” In some villages, this is still so. In some villages, gossip on the matter is acceptable, but anything more is offensive.
For brevity: It wasn’t discussed. A rule, an unspoken rule akin to covering your loins and boeing your when a woman or widuu enters the baths — if you were raised correctly, you never had to be told outright. Adults were never to discuss the specifics of the Vanishing around children.
Especially not Adel and Utor.
As a boy, Adel was fascinated by the Beasts of the past. From hulking grey brutes with coarse skin and horned faces to the cherubic mutants ancient men kept as soft-furred companions, every child had a favorite. Children often had encyclopedic knowledge that would soon wear off as they lose interest and enter middle childhood. At 6 and a half, Adel was no different. His favorite vanished beast was the Dog.
Adel's best friend, Utor, favored the common Horse. Utor was a sensitive child. He played nicely with boys and girls, yet preferred to play alone. Usually polite, he had an occasional defiance streak, and a strong sense of justice. Regarded, perhaps prematurely, as a precocious sign or intelligence or virtue, this judiciousness was encouraged by the village tutors. Utor was the only child who played with Adel. The two engaged in imagination-play, crawling around on all fours, imitating sounds that could have been. What it must have been like to be them, to see them, the four-legged Beasts of yore.
They spoke of many things, but the Vanished Beasts sparked many conversations. Arguments, too. Utor’s parents and Adel’s mother never had to intervene, not until one day in Springtime.
While weaving crowns of daisies in the field, just ever so slightly out of the watchful eye of his overworked mother, Adel stole Utor's ring of daisies and crowned his own head with a triumphant display of listless bluffing.
Utor was upset, but he centered himself. He refused ‘caste-sink to the aggressor’ as his militant uncle would put it. The thought of this own mercy emboldened him. He reached out to swipe the crown off his thieving friend.
To Utor’s shock Adel slapped his hand away. Far harder than a friend had ever slapped him prior. The kind of slap reserved for the lowest of disciplining. Utor clutched his aching hand, dewdrops of tears welling up in his eyes. Silence became tensions as they watched the wheels in each other’s expressions start to turn. Utor thought carefully, as carefully as he could think with a stinging hand.
"I see why you like the Dog. It was the most meanest four-leg of them all."
It was the first insult he could think of. A cogent retort, or so he thought. Adel was being cruel. Adel loved the Dog. Utor only liked the daisy chain, but Adel hurt him physically. In young Utor’s mind, this exchange of blows was Hammurabian. Surely, they would resume playing.
To his surprise, Adel retorted instantaneously.
“The Horse carried meaner men than any Dog.“ Though it was mumbled with unmet eyes, its tone was as if Adel had been waiting say this all year.
A new, foreign kind of humiliation thrummed in Utor’s chest. His fair-skinned face burned ruddy. It chemical-burned from rejection into rage. It burned so much, made so much pressure in his skull, he was screaming like screaming kettle he said, “when hungry, the Dog would eat…. raw….”
Utor’s shaking voice snagged on taboo, yet still, he elaborated.
“The raw pulp of their own. Of fellow Dogs.”
Adel was never an expressive child. (He had not even cried at birth, even as the midwife chanted a hearty mantra, unsheathed her stiletto to sever the umbilical cord round his neck.)
"Dogs ate their masters."
"That's not true."
"Dogs ate their masters even when they weren't hungry. Dogs bit-“
Utor’s vision eclipsed into sudden darkness as Adel’s left-hook struck him. A slap, why- every child has been slapped. That was life in the Crescent. This was not a slap, this was a balled-fist strike.
Utor stayed in a heap on the ground, even as the teal-green sky phased back into sight above him, quick tears quickening the kohl to run from his eyelids to his snot-dripping chin. Finally, he manages:
“You hit me. You HIT me! I’m telling your mother! I’m telling hyr!”
No response. Just heavy breathing from Adel, looming above him with an uncharacteristic scowl. The whimpers continued.
“You’re no worse, no worse at all, than a vanished Dog,” he cried.
Adel’s mother heard the exaggerated wail of Utor from nearly sixty strides away. Hy wished it to be a playful holler, waited a pinch. Alas, another scream. More anxious than agitated, hy gathered up the hem of hyr silks and headed for the field. What a horrid child, hy thought fondly, just like his father.
Year ago, when the midwife cut the noose around his neck, Adel drew his first breath as a sort of trade.
He began to cry. And cry, and cry. His mother bled, and bled, and bled until she passed, became his foremother. His father cried too. His father, he-now-hy, cried so hard, that the soul of the foremother passed into the gouge in hyr heart. That must have been why, the villagers thought, that Adel’s father became Adel’s widuu mother so willingly. This was what the villagers gossiped, anyway, and continue to do so.
43 notes · View notes
bitchesuntitled · 2 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
Costco
Marcus Acacius x F!Reader wc: 2,421
Summary: Imagine if you will that you work at Costco, there's some weird stuff in the jalapeno poppers and some time travel happens. Warnings/Tags: MDNI 18+ content(GO ON GIT), Sex pollen-ish(?), Unprotected PinV(be smarter than this), jalapeno poppers, costco, inappropriate use of a storage room, explicit language, time travel shenanigans, oral sex, think that's it if I missed anything let me know! A/N: I wrote this for a discord server fic exchange and it is for the wonderful @beefrobeefcal who I also tricked into helping me edit it because she is the sweetest! She's already seen it, I'm just now getting around to posting it. Thank you much to @jay-zzle for the amazing moodboard and helping me brainstorm on this story, without you this would not be a thing <3
Masterlist||AO3
divider by @saradika-graphics
Tumblr media
“New! Bacon-wrapped stuffed jalapeños!” The front of the box states. What should be delicious looks more like if someone picked up a dog turd and wrapped bacon around it, trying to pass it off as something edible. John, your boss, was making you pass out the free samples of these supposed stuffed jalapeños.
Surely they aren’t that bad , you think, stomach rumbling, reminding yourself you had skipped lunch today. Glancing around to make sure no customers were about before grabbing one of the samples and popping it into your mouth.
“Oh god,” you mumble past a mouthful of cream cheese, bacon, and jalapeño in disgust. They look and taste like shit. You suppose you can’t expect much from prepackaged frozen food though. The bitter sour taste still on your tongue as you grab your water bottle off the table, chugging some of it to try and rid your mouth of the gross flavor. 
Reaching for the box to check the expiration date on these things, they’ve got to be expired with that sort of flavor. The ground begins to shake violently, toppling the box onto the floor. Your head snaps up to look around. What the fuck was that?
All Marcus could remember was running on the battlefield before slamming into this mysterious shelf housing weird colorful goods. A woman in strange clothing gasped, grasping the child next to her, also wearing strange clothes, before quickly scurrying away. Where are their tunics? The footwear they wore looked suffocating compared to his thin leather sandals. He looked around, trying to determine where he was.
Everything in this place was so damn bright and colorful. Not that Rome didn’t have its fair share of colorful beauty, but these appeared ten times brighter than Marcus has ever seen, such as the weird candles above his head that appear to possess the sun’s power with their bright intensity. He starts walking along the smooth stone passage, hoping to find someone he can speak with to figure out where he is and hopefully get some answers on how to get back to Rome.
He spots a beautiful woman in a blue apron standing behind a table. A kind smile graces her face as people walk past her. He thinks she must be selling goods at her table and decides to approach her for help. This must be a sign from the gods. This woman with her sweet smile and beauty beyond anything he could ever imagine, surely she’d be able to help him in his time of need.
After eating the supposed stuffed jalapeño, you weren’t feeling the best but you knew the last thing John would do is let you leave. Business as usual, doling out polite smiles as customers pass you by, glancing at the free samples and shaking their heads. No one wanted to try these monstrosities and you didn’t blame them.
“Oh, great,” you huff, rolling your eyes, spotting a man dressed in full Roman garb walking around aimlessly, “Must be some sort of convention in town again.” The man approaches you cautiously.
“Good afternoon,” you say with an upbeat, chipper tone, “Would you like to try some brand new stuffed jalapeño poppers that just came in?” you ask, gesturing to the stuffed peppers before you. “Despite how they look, they are indeed pretty tasty,” you say, giving the man a saccharine smile.
“What?” The man murmurs, glancing at the samples sitting on the table.
“They are a new product we just got in,” you explain, tilting your head to study him. The man continues to stare down at the table; he appears somewhat frazzled, like a small child who has lost his mother in the store. “Have you ever been to a Costco, sir?
“A Cos- what?” The man repeats, brown eyes narrowing as he stares at you. A fire in your veins lit up from his dark eyes peering at you, goosebumps rushing across your skin from his heavy glare.
“Costco,” you gulp, your tongue feeling like sandpaper against the roof of your mouth. You gesture your arms around. “The store we’re in? Listen, you okay, man?” you ask, grabbing your water bottle again.
“Never been here,” he murmurs, gripping the table between you, taking deep steadying breaths.
“It’s all good! I can understand the panic,” you chuckle nervously, taking a swig of your water bottle. The cool water gives your throat a short sense of relief as it travels down your esophagus. “This place is kind of overwhelming your first time. But we like to give customers samples of food so they can try it before they buy it?”
“Is this the local market for your region?” He asks, peering up at you. 
“Market? Region?” You ask, rolling your eyes, “Dude, I get you might be in character or whatever,” your eyes trailing up and down along his form, butterflies flitting about in your stomach as you really take notice of him. His skirt showing off his bare muscular legs, his strong torso filling out the chest plate of the armor he wore, his biceps straining against the fabric of his tunic, “But let’s keep it to today's times, please.” You grab one of the jalapeño poppers and shove it towards him. “Eat it.”
He takes it from you gingerly, fingers brushing against one another and a tingly sensation shoots straight through you to your core, thighs clenching together as you feel a rush of arousal seeping into your underwear. The man looks at you and then at the food.
“Just take a bite of it.” You laugh nervously, “Not like it’s poison or something.”
His eyes narrow at you with the mention of poison and he continues to stare at it.
“Look, I’ll even eat one too, so you know it’s not poisonous,” you murmur, picking up one of the jalapeños and taking a good-sized bite to prove your point. “Mmmm,” you let out an exaggerated hum around a mouthful of the disgusting appetizer. The man slowly brings the pepper to his lips before biting into it, grimacing at the foul taste in his mouth, but continues to swallow before grabbing another to devour. “Hey man, you’re only supposed to take one.” you caution, watching him eat the second sample before he grabs your water bottle, attempting to open it. “Woah now, hold on just a minute there.”
“Water!” he gasps, shaking your water bottle, his big hand gripping the flesh of his throat. “I need water.”
Your eyes widen, nodding dumbly as you open the water bottle for him and hand it over. He snatches it from your hands, suckling down the liquid in heavy gulps, watching as his throat bobs up and down as he swallows. It feels like someone has turned up the heat, your breath coming faster as you watch him. This should not turn you on as much as it is. This man is simply drinking water to quench his thirst.
“W-what’s your name?” you ask, the ache between your thighs growing in intensity the longer you stare, watching as he places the water bottle back on the table with a loud – thunk – he stares at you, his pupils overshadowing the deep brown of his irises.
“Marcus,” he growls. Your cunt flutters around nothing, hearing the baritone of his voice. “And yours?” you let out a small squeak, giving him your name. You can feel the sweat dripping down the column of your spine as you stand there staring at one another. You watch a bead of sweat slide down from his temple, trailing to the side of his neck. It makes your insides scream, wanting to leap across the table and lick it off his skin. You can’t take it anymore.
“Follow me,” you whisper, a small whimper escaping your lips, reaching across the table, gripping his wrist firmly, and pulling him to follow you to the back of the food section. The storage room for the freezers should be a good spot. No one likes going in there because of how cold it is but the frigid temperature doesn’t even register with the way your body feels like it’s on fire.
You grip Marcus’ wrist harder, pulling him in and shutting the door behind you, turning to face him. A puff of air escapes your lips as you breathe out, approaching him slowly, watching his dark eyes drink you in. He grabs your waist, pulling you flush against him, his mouth descending onto your own with a grunt as his tongue flicks against your bottom lip. You gasp, creating enough space between your lips for Marcus to plunge his tongue into your mouth, tongues rolling against one another, fighting for dominance. He grunts, pushing you against the wall, trailing his lips across the column of your throat.
“Marcus,” you pant, breath hitching at the simple touch of his lips against your neck. He groans as your fingers tug his dark curls, “More, Marcus. Please,” you beg, shoving his hand below your apron, letting him feel the heat of your pussy through the jeans that cover your legs. His hand comes to the waistband of your jeans, trying to tug them off before you help him unbutton them and slide them down your legs, kicking off your shoes in the process. Goosebumps ripple down your legs as Marcus’ strong calloused hands caress your skin, inching their way back towards your thighs.
“Beautiful,” Marcus hums, grabbing one leg and placing it on his shoulder, “Such a sight to behold,” he murmurs, kissing the soft skin of your inner thigh.
“Marcus,” you gasp, your hand reaching down to grasp his hair and pushing his face where you want it most. He lets out a deep chuckle, nosing the fabric that covers your mound.
“You smell delicious, sweet girl,” He grins, taking a deep breath in against your pussy. His fingers toy with the elastic of your underwear, hooking them in and pulling your underwear to the side as his tongue makes contact with your center. Already feeling the coil in your belly tightening at the first contact of his tongue. You let out a ragged moan as his tongue swirls against your bundle of nerves.
“Fuck, Marcus,” you whine, and he grunts against your pussy as you tug on his hair. The vibrations against your clit causing the coil to snap inside you. Your back bows as waves of pleasure wash over you. “ Fuckfuckfuckfuck ,” you cry out, smothering Marcus’ face with your juices.
Marcus stands, his lips and chin glistening from your arousal as he looks down at you, “My turn,” he grunts, gripping your waist quickly and pushing you to the nearest flat surface. His hand comes to the back of your neck, gently nudging you down against the pallet of fish sticks. You want to laugh at how ridiculous this all is, but a moan comes out instead, feeling his thick fingers push inside you. The frills of his skirt hit the back of your thighs, and your pussy clenches around his fingers, turning your upper half to try and get a look at him. His fingers leave the warmth of your sex, one hand still gently on the back of your neck while the other reaches under his skirt and tunic, pushing the fabric aside for his length to bob freely, shuffling closer to you.
“Oh gods, I need to feel your warmth around me,” He growls, looking up at the wrecked expression on your face, “This is okay, yes?” he asks, rubbing his tip between your folds. “Please tell me it’s okay,” he grunts, notching the head of his cock at your entrance.
“Fuck yes,” you cry out, the fire in your veins burning brighter from his touch, “Please,” you whisper, your legs trembling with effort to stay upright. Marcus snaps his hips forward, plunging his length into your heat. Your walls create space for him as his thick cock kisses your womb. Your hands scramble, attempting to find something to hold onto. Marcus’ arms reach past your shoulders, caging you beneath him as he grips your hands and shushes you.
“It’s all right, sweet girl,” he coos. “You’ll be fine,” he continues, pulling back a few inches before snapping back into your warmth with hunger. “Remember, it's my turn now.” He taunts, feeling your walls already beginning to flutter around him.
“Oh god,” you whimper, writhing as his length saws in and out of you with fervor.
“Oh gods, look at you,” Marcus grunts, grinding his cock into you harder, “Taking me so well,” he groans, squeezing your hands tighter as his hips continue to move against you. His chest comes flush against your back, “Are you going to come for me, sweet girl?” he breathes against your neck. You let out a pitiful moan and nod. “I can feel how much you’re enjoying this,” he comments with a grin, moving one of his hands down to your center, feeling his length punch into you over and over again.
“Fuck !” You scream out when Marcus pinches your clit, your walls clenching tightly around his cock as your orgasm takes over. It feels like a ball of energy has erupted within your body and zips down all your limbs, ears ringing as you faintly hear Marcus grunting and growling behind you. 
“Oh gods,” he shouts behind you, thrusting into you half a dozen more times before painting your walls with his warm spend, collapsing on top of you. “I have never felt like that,” he murmurs, kissing your shoulder.
“Me neither,” you hum, feeling your body floating back to earth.
You pull your pants on clumsily as you hear your boss calling your name through the faint buzzing in your ears. 
“The hell are you woman?” Pushing through the freezer storage doors, John shouts, “Why are you back here?”
“I- we- I- well,” you start, smoothing your shirt down before slipping your apron back on.
“Save it,” John huffs, glaring between you and Marcus. “Get him outta this room,” he says, pointing at Marcus, “and start pulling those jalapeño poppers off the shelves. The FDA called every grocery store in the country and issued a mass recall. Apparently, they’re having some weird effect on people,” he says with a shrug of his shoulders.
“Sure thing, John,” you huff, walking with Marcus towards the door, giving John a pat on the shoulder, “But I gotta go to the health section first and see if we have any plan B in stock.”
28 notes · View notes
blood-orange-juice · 3 days ago
Text
The embarrassing part is so embarrassing I have trouble sitting through the cutscene. I can't. It's lovely that he doesn't give a shit but I cant.
Ok, 3rd attempt.
This face. "I'm not going to like what comes next." The only other instance where he makes that face is right before the ruin guard scene.
Tumblr media
Otherwise I like how unfazed he looks
Tumblr media Tumblr media
tbf no, I don't think this is anywhere close to covering the cost of his therapy
Tumblr media
The voice here. He sounds so nice. I like how the voice doesn't match the expression.
Tumblr media
Oh, I want a fic about previous assessments.
Also he uses a wind glider there. I wanted to write a scene where Lumine teaches him to use one but I guess not.
Tumblr media
The voice here as well. Genuine polite surprise. He's very good at pretending.
The understanding "aah" he says when they cave and the little chuckle after are just... ADFGHGFDFGGFDSDFDSDFGDF. CHEWING ON WALLS. This little shit (also none of the translations got this part right, English one is probably the closest).
Also, I think, it's the second time he laughs genuinely?
Also, hmm, other Harbingers shout at recruits and, according to Childe himself, kill them sometimes and he can't even let them wait for a day. Responsible boy.
Tumblr media
I love that we can just say no.
(and *that's* when he offers money. DUDE. you should have started with it. Lumine's 19 Mora feel very lonely in her pocket)
Tumblr media
Actually we still can't say no. Oh Lumine...
She is not immune to puppy eyes and a promise of payment.
Tumblr media
I think that's his work ethics summed up in three words.
Tumblr media
Yup, he's used to people perceiving spars with him as an honour.
Tumblr media
Was she trying to say something nice to him? Lumine...
Tumblr media
I like how Signora killing recruits is implied but not confirmed. Buddy is an unreliable narrator after all.
Tumblr media
This is very interesting. It implies there *is* a reason why he's trying to get stronger (he states the opposite in Labyrinth Warriors)
Tumblr media
A proper traveler! Oh this is sad.
Tumblr media
The tone implies he knows who did it. <3
Tumblr media
Oh, I forgot it wasn't his idea, it was Teucer's. I retract my earlier statement about him being reckless for entertainment points and picking an abandoned factory instead of a nice walk near a river or something.
He can't say no to kids but it's a different problem.
Tumblr media
He's awful (affectionate). I bet talent for emotional blackmail runs in the family. Imagine how much worse Tonya is.
Starting Childe's story quest with 19 mora.
For, you know, realism
Tumblr media
55 notes · View notes
zarnzarn · 4 months ago
Text
(check the tags for more and also the tag for other fics in the story!)
athena, scowling as she gets bullied into marrying the people she pined over for the last 1000 years, suddenly realising something: wait a minute
odysseus: what?
athena, frozen: wait a damn minute you know what this gives me rights to do
penelope, also realising: oh fuck yes
odysseus: I don't like the sound of whatever's happening here what are you two fucking talking about?
athena, grabbing the marriage wine and tossing it back, then kissing her new wife and husband and handing penelope a spear as she picks up a mace: we'll be back shortly, you can start celebrations without us.
penelope: do u have anything that can start a fire
athena, pulling out an old contract and scanning it before throwing it over her shoulder: yes. are you scared of heights or can we fly.
penelope: fucking bring it I've waited years for this moment
zeus: where are they going
hermes, picking up the contract: they're going to... Ogygia? Oh fucking shit they're going to fucking kill Calypso- hey, hello, WAIT-
#odysseus disappears midway because athena plants one on him so hard his soul evaporates#(strategic to make him stop from coming after them and also from passion she forgot to hold back for once)#(and also shes maybe possibly in love and cant wait to get vengeance on Calypsos bitch ass who hurt him so much for so long)#penelope has had to deal with calypos afteraffects for literally the rest of their lives. from flashbacks to odysseus inconsolably crying#at her feet for forgiveness some days even though shes always said frim the first moment that it wasnt his fault#the rest of the gods have to chase them down to prevent them from eternally torturing calypso (goddesses cant die <3)#athenas blazing mad and sick with guilt and horror. she couldn't attack before because it would be seen as an attack from olympus#but as a wife! as two wifes! no political implications there no holds barred calypso gets her ass BEAT#but also pls imagine them chasing her and gods chasing them round and round the island while screaming#odysseus wavered like 17 times on whether to ask hermes for a lift there or not but goes in the end#their honeymoon in truth ends up being on ogygia#athena lovingly and seductively teaching penelope how to fillet a person both of them covered in ichor#odysseus with a hand over his mouth blushing grinning tears in eyes torn between turned on and terrified to be back and crying coz they lov#him that much.#((he goes to her just before they leave in the cave she used to drag him to. she can barely hold herself up and hes shaking to approach))#((but he's stronger now. settled and satisfied and content. he kneels by her and sets down bandages next to her.))#((i told you i was married he says. and because his truest weapon is his tongue- if youd just listened i wouldve found us both a way out))#she sobs and he leaves. the scars will never fade fully but he feels lighter as he steps out into the sun where athene and pen are waiting.#bloodsoaked and being shouted at by hera but smiling at him widely and gleefully as he approaches. takes a hand each and presses him btwn.#he squeezes back with a smile and leans into them. his beautiful horrifying wives#odypenath#odypenetha#odysseus#penelope#athena#odypen#odyath#penath#epic the musical#love in paradise
141 notes · View notes
cementcornfield · 2 months ago
Text
Did you see the clip of Joe yesterday?
Is it a clip now? Oh lord....was it funny at least?
It was the first time he ever used the F word in a conference.
He cursed? Y'all lying...I be trying to get him to curse, he don't curse when I'm talking to him...
126 notes · View notes
fumifooms · 7 days ago
Text
Okay okay new flekille angle... Fleki joking about being a "dark elf" and Marcille being uncomfortable about it... Fleki saying it and teasing with it BECAUSE it makes Marcille unsure and uncomfortable.
No because okay okay rundown : 'dark elf' is a catch-all term for elves who show unsavory behavior or commit wrong actions, wether violence, theft, scamming or lying... It being a shorthand for criminals in general is a safe assumption to make, especially since they're classically demonized already.
"Okay but Fleki? Run me through the situation what does it have to do with flekille." Short sociology lesson, because of urgent needs being unable to be met through honest means & with the system favoring others instead, people from poorer more neglected social classes tend to fall into crime & bad crowds more easily. Having less ressources means the 'solutions' you do have are more extreme, wether it be for regulating your mental health or stabilizing your income or living situation. Here's a study link if interested.
Why I think Fleki may have been lower class, before becoming a prisoner? Okay stay with me here, elves are very hierarchal and xenophobic, even while being colonizers. Referring to the area guide blurbs, the northern central continent (NCC) is managed with more restrictions but also more valued in general than the southern central continent (SCC), which also has a widespread elven population. It's said life is "safe and easy" in the NCC, so alongside all the noble elves we have info for come from the NCC, we can see a dynamic form where NCC continent elves are from a higher safer social class than SCC elves.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Another hint of this is the characters' names. If you compare their name origins, a pattern starts appearing where... Well @room-surprise did the work and has more knowledge than me so, the way they put it: "It seems like every elf that has a clearly Germanic or Slavic name is either a criminal or a lower-class person and everyone who is higher class seems to have names that are Latin, Greek, or West/South Asian."
And this seems like a lot of large vague groups options that don't mean much, but this tidbit of info becomes more telling when knowing which races are more associated with what languages and cultures. For a full look into it I recommend this essay, but to get to the point here concisely: 'Fleki' is old norse. 'Otta' and 'Helki' are other elves with old norse names, but for what it's worth Otta is from the NCC, and who knows about Helki's origins. They're the only elves with old norse names at all, but three's a crowd. Who else do we know are scandinavian coded? That's right, Laios and his home region. Tallmen.
Prisoner/non-noble elves tend to have old norse names while none of the noble ones do. And wouldn't that be interesting if tied with tallmen being nordic, wouldn't it be a result of the cultural mixing happening in the less rich regions and the lower social classes, since noble elves are especially xenophobic and uppity about social classes?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Ironically, our protagonist Laios has a greek name, something associated with elves in Dungeon Meshi, but just like Anoutolid and Nussa (two of Laios' father's dogs) could have been picked as names because Laios' father likes names from myths, with the dogs this is canon but in case of Laios it's probably more of a meta joke. ANYWAYS! Go in the essay for more info, all I'm saying is, tallmen = nordic, elves having nordic names = possible cultural mixing, on the continent that canonically has more immigration and less restrictions but is also less safe and 'easy' to live in.
Elves concentrating all their efforts and wealth into the 1% is too real and it checks out. It's also hinted at and mentioned many times through canon and extra info (Misyl's Complete Adventurer's Bible blurb for one) that the canaries overpolice and charge criminals too heavily because they lack manpower, so they want people arrested and want them arrested for longer to have more canaries. Fleki was arrested because of possession and sale of ancient magic artifacts, and only got into ancient magic for the money. Look I'm just saying, it lines up that Fleki would turn to crime because her material conditions weren't great! And as a criminal, she's automatically fit to either having been treated as a dark elf or joke and taunt about it. Especially since the lore info extra on dark elves is set somewhere where tallmen approached unfriendly elves, while this could be a tallman unused to elves outside of rumors thus approaching them with a reckless idealized view, the casualness of it makes me think this is the sort of contact that was likely to happen in an area with a lot of elves and a lot of tallmen living nearby each other, ie the SCC.
Mentioning the Mithrun-Hareus parallels AGAIN but Mithrun and the canaries directly contrast Daltian Clan, it' holds up and makes sense a result especially of Mithrun being hareus' exact lookalike. It's fantasy vs reality of Marcille idealizing Daltian Clan and elven military through General Hareus and novels growing up, then realizing that the real elven military is miserable and very much not glamorous and general Mithrun is dehydrated, rude and after her life. So this plotline about idolizing vs demonizing elves as a race, stances that are very split within the dunmeshi cast, is very Marcille-centric within canon's story. She herself goes from associating with them a lot and being prideful about it & elven customs, to condemning their superiority complex and narrow-mindedness and being on the run from the elven military, before becoming an advisor for a short-lived tallman court, which is seen as dishonorable for elves, as Marcille the half-elf. There's a bit of an arc here, regardless of how much change she actually went through or if it was always just performance on her part that she wasn't really attached to.
So obviously this is all to say that Marcille having a romance with a very underprivileged elf, a "dark elf", would be not only compelling but relevant. FLEKILLE SUPREMACY!!!!!
Half-elf woman who drank the koolaid a bit growing up and idolized elves and tried her best to fit the image of one x woman who knows personally the shortcomings of that same idolized society and embodies that a bit, who breaks that elegant image by being crass and unapologetic and a criminal prisoner, who would have no problem breaking Marcille's fantasies about it, a full elf who still grew up disadvantaged and demonized. Marcille has been emulating elves all her life, perhaps in the hopes of being accepted more or feeling a bigger sense of cultural belonging, but Fleki is there, showing her hey, it isn't that great anyways, hey it doesn't matter squat if you're an elf or not people will always find excuses to mistreat you anyways. It's Fleki taunting and saying come be dark elves with me and Marcille coming to understand and replying no, we're both just elves.
#imagine me doing Ace Attorney gestures bc this is how i feel rn. with the power of sociopolitics on our side let us make flekille romance#meta#fleki#flekille#marcille donato#Shipping is so serious to me ToT no but genuinely where else would you explore human relationships n feelings n psychology as much#Giggling kicking my feet this is again a marchil parallel. Bc marchil in canon is about this too he's at the core of her arc#It's him who talks shit about elves the most it's him that shows her the reality of people who have tighter finances#It's him that grounds her and teaches her to balance her idealism and it's to him she says elves are too prideful#But this is why i like rin x pattadol too. Woman with elf trauma wary of elves x young naive elf woman that's part of the oppressive elven#system but genuinely thinks this all good being done for the greater good#Slapping Dreaming Utopia by Ryoko Kui as sociopolitics 101 once again#for what it's worth Fleki's the one who dishonestly taunted about using politically correct terms too so she might be cheeky with dark elf#colonizers do get influenced by the culture of the people they colonize also often which is another interesting to think about with dm elve#For example both Utaya and the elves having indian coding#but again could just be historical cultural mixing since they're more or less close regionally#sweating about this post a lil ngl hopefully the bad crowd doesn't find it. Rehabilitative > punitive justice. interculturalism good.#ty that is all#elven prisoners becoming soldiers is kinda like LA prisoners becoming firefighters huh.#thinking once again about Cithis having a deep hatred for rich people
10 notes · View notes
xxplastic-cubexx · 24 days ago
Text
still thinking of my fave marvel rivals interaction where my jeff and i were hanging on the point after knocking out the other team and lil bro sprays the space in front of me and emotes and we both said thank you at the same time like i fear im never forgetting that ever
#marvel rivals#snap chats#i made the strangest delighted sound afterwards dare i say it was wholesome 😭almost cried sorry im a big baby#of course afterwards we had to go back to Murder but still ... ill never forget you my finny friend....#havent had an exp like that since .... i hope to tho ...#closest i got is sometimes my wanda will look me up and down- maybe strafe a lil but thats about it#wait no you know what my fave thing is .. i do love Lowkey babying wandas on my team vaeJLKVJAELKJ i am not sorry#LIKE AS A TANK OF COURSE i try to prioritize the main team but if everyones fine ill usually hover around her#i keep an especial eye on her ok listen she gives me big energy sword i give her magnet shields its MUTUALISM#anyway i wanted to draw the jeff story out but i keep getting swamped with stuff so. alas. youll just have to imagine#if it helps jeff was wearin the dolphin costume and yeah i threw up from cuteness. esp with the lil beach ball ....#Big Ass Scary Magneto and lil baby jeff simultaneous Thank You ... its the little things i fear ...#a part of it helps that magneto can just sound so Polite with these voice lines LMAO#like his 'Hello' tickles me it's so Hello There :) .. like a distinguished gentleman ... like a grandpa who SOMETIMES gives you a casserole#thats his whole vibe tbh i wanted to make a post bout it- how mags def has Father/Grandfather To All energy and i love it#hes not even the oldest in the roster far from it.. lol.. visually he looks the oldest#if i may quote him tho .. Save Perhaps Thor ... He May Be His Equal in that regard AJELKVJAEKLJ BUT ANYWAY#im off to work on a thing#i should have it done tomorrow and i can finally share it (among other joys) with everyone :]
18 notes · View notes
sanicsmut · 8 months ago
Text
people : its important to be inclusive, yes even of identities you don't understand ! support he/him lesbians !
these same people when its about using multiples contradictory labels because identity is complicated and fluid : if you support this you're actually evil
#i support he/him lesbians btw#but just#just learn the history of your own fucking label before saying such bullshit online#and in your dni lmao#stop being chronically online#yes its about mspec lesbians#JUST LEARN ABOUT LESBIAN HISTORY IM BEGGING YOU#you cant be political about lesbianism and act like you know whats good or not for the community#while simultaneously ignoring lesbian history#thats not how it works you dont get to pick and choose whats real or not#mspec lesbians have existed since the beginning and its only on the internet that people started acting like theyre not valid or whatever#btw being bi doesn't inherently mean liking men and women<3#lesbianism in the most common definition I see (liking women and non-binary people) IS an identity under the bi umbrella.#like im sorry but if you think it isnt like#do you think enby people are just randomly included in all orientations just because you dont know where to put them?#are we like a bonus so your label can be considered inclusive?#you can not be attracted to nb people like imagine being a lesbian against mspec lesbians and say “uh they want to impose men in lesbianism#then say you like women and enby people when non binary is such a big umbrella that can include people who identify partially as men#like what do you do then?#nb doesnt inherently means agender or partially woman you know?#i just think its important to think about these things before saying nonsense ^v^#youre free to use the label you want of course and youre free to be lesbian and say youre attracted to women and non binary people but just#dont say such stupid thing if its your case#because its not coherent
26 notes · View notes
ratatatastic · 3 months ago
Note
scare the hoes more and keep yapping about ekky (& others) getting used to maffhew, it delights me. and say even more about how sasha handles this feral and sweet omega that gets dropped into his orbit. smth smth “feels like i’ve known him 10 years” or whatever vows sasha recited to the press, cameras, and god
Tumblr media
apparently we are taking more tumblr user ratatatastic abo yap thoughts for 500 may god hear our screams up wherever he is. big man in the sky you fuckin owe me one.
i think theres so much in particular to say in concerns of 1619 and how quickly they gelled irl but even more so in an abo au
ive always enjoyed when people assign matthew stronger scents that take getting used to if you don't like it already and i know ive read a fic where his scent notes did skew towards stronger cinnamon foods/drinks
anyways on that note it wouldnt surprise me that sasha takes so easy to this spicy little omega.
Like of course he does, he smells like the pastries he used to eat back at home, the pastries he eats now because he's found an established Finnish bakery down here that makes them homemade every morning, the bakery he likes to frequent with the other Finns when he can.
Is it ever a wonder that the cute omega that sent him such a terribly sweet text when the trade news broke out (you know, after the initial excitement worn off because Sasha does chuckle at memory of the brash "Fucking, right!" that pinged on his phone the very first time from an unknown number) smells like... home... No matter all the rumours that have swirled around Matthew, the rumours Sasha has personally experienced himself playing against him...he smells nostalgic. Like Sasha could be at home right now—you know, home home—lounging outside his cottage with tea and pastries on the little table that he's set out. The warm cinnamon that wafts from the typically sterile room they've assigned for pressers smells divine, for lack of a better word. It smells indulgent. Because Sasha can't have those homely pastries all the time, what, with his training regiment.
It's why he doesn't quite believe it that Matthew's the one that's the centre of it all. He's absolutely convinced he's hallucinating because the season is about to start and he's had to cut back on all his favourite sweets as much as it pains him to but for the betterment of the team? He'd do anything. And yet despite the way he rubs at his nose to at least try to clear it, he smells that cinnamon. That cinnamon that's definitely coming from new omega they traded over who's laughing so obnoxiously at the lectern they have set up that if his scent didn't catch your attention, his loud mannerisms certainly did. His voice is practically bouncing off the walls in big loud echoes that should hurt Sasha’s ears. Emphasis on should. As it is he finds his heart melting more than it should instead.
It's been quite a long time since someone's scent has moved him this much. All the people that have, have been in his life for so long he's forgotten what it's like to feel instant scent compatibility. His nostrils are flaring and he's trying his best not to open his mouth to huff in big gulps of it because it's rather impolite to be so obviously scenting the new guy. It could be misconstrued as Sasha taking offence to the new presence in the room.
Some part of his brain is still trying to catch up to the idea that Matthew even smells at all because the first time he met him (down here for some joint offseason ice-time) he didn't particularly smell like much, if at all really. Whether it's because he put on blockers to not intrude on pack territory until he smelled more like them, or he was still on suppressants even in the summer, Sasha wasn't sure and he definitely wasn't going to ask about it.
Known him for 10 years? He feels like he's known him his whole life. But 10's a safe number, 10's a number that won't scare off this new omega, right? 10's a number that conveys "As Captain I want this to work out, I'm opening up my pack for you, I won't shun you, you're welcome here," and not "If I stick my nose in your neck right now to scent you, they're gonna have to forcibly evict me from the new home I've found in you, and it's not gonna be a pretty outcome."
It's also why he's a little nervous when Media Day is over because despite how much it dragged along in years past it practically blitzed by and now Sasha has to—
You know, properly scent the new addition. Give them the purring acceptance of their Pack leader's scent to carry with them. And it's nothing big, it's just some chaste wrist rubbing... something subtle and not too overwhelming for everyone: the pack, and the newcomer alike. It's not like Sasha is going to mouth at Matthew's neck glands. He doesn't think he can even handle that right now but that's a problem for future Sasha—for when Matthew is really part of the pack and not like a goldfish in a plastic bag being dunked into an aquarium to get used to the water temperature. He just has to rub his wrist against his, it's like basic Alpha etiquette. It'll be fine, mostly. He hopes.
And it's as anticlimactic as he thought it'd be: gentle reintroductions and reignited chatter of excitement about the new season that's about to start... maybe just with the new lingering scent of sweet and spice in the background as if someone lit up a candle without Sasha even noticing it. It's a struggle to keep his eyes from closing from how heavy they feel, from how relaxed he feels in the presence of this new omega he knows has pissed him off on several occasions as composed as he was about it.
Matthew presents his wrist in a flourish successfully managing to divert his attention back to what they're supposed to be doing all alone like this in the dressing room like this, "I'm sure you've been dying to do this huh, Cap?"
Sweat starts to break out at the back of his neck. He knows? Sasha doesn't think he's been sending off any signals that could've hinted otherwise but Sasha admits that he's well out of practise, he hasn't had to reign in his scent this much in such a long time, and maybe Matthew picked up his weird fixation—
Matthew waggles his eyebrows for extra effect an offbeat later when the joke doesn't seem to land the way he wanted it to.
Oh, thank Christ, he's just teasing him. It's a joke. He doesn't actually mean it in the way Sasha thought he meant.
"Yes. Yes, I have," Sasha chuckles in relief, shaking his head at Matthew's attempt to lighten the mood.
"10 years, or so I've heard, bud."
"You heard? Uh, listened to the..." he trails off.
"Kinda hard not to when the setup made it sound like you were in the middle of the Earth, my guy. I don't think my ears are ever gonna recover from that."
"It's the first day for everyone," Sasha lightly chastises, not particularly aggrieved at all but wanting to keep up the banter to stall for time, so he can prepare himself. Quite honestly he feels like travelled back in time to the young anxious Alpha he was breaking out into the league for the first time.
"Be gentle, I bruise easily."
"Right, gentle. I'll treat you better than my clothes on the delicate cycle."
"Is that supposed to be a line?" Matthew says in glee, his voice pitching into incredulity.
"Line like fishing?"
"Oh, come on! You know what I'm talking about! You've been in this country long enough to pick up on that!"
"Yes, yes, that."
Matthew shoves at his shoulder playfully. "Just go on and do the thing already."
"Doing the thing."
Matthew snorts but his wrist is limp in Sasha’s hold. And as much as it was a dumb joke he does feel delicate between his fingers like that. So delicate that when he rubs his own wrist against his—to transfer over their pack scent—he feels like he's going to break it if he holds onto it for too long. It's why he drops it as quick as he took it, hands scrambling to his sides in an effort to remain polite but also to get a handle on himself so his pheromones don't go haywire with the new stimulus. It's a bit of a losing battle because he knows his scent just. But he can play it off as the excitement of an Alpha being able to claim another member to his pack, it's a possessive kind of thing.
"Well, see you around! Call it a hunch but I have a feeling we'll be seeing more of each other." And the joke wasn't funny the first time, truly the equivalent of leaning on the office fax machine and going "You come here often?" to your coworkers who just want to get their work done—and just as sleazy too with the greasy grin Matthew has permanently stuck to his face but Sasha still laughs like he did the first time he heard it.
And it's only now that Matthew is gone that Sasha realises the room smells strongly of cinnamon, so potent that anyone with a working nose would be able to tell that. Like Matthew was doing his best to ease Sasha’s obvious nerves when Sasha should've been the one to calm the omega who's been uprooted from their own pack and thrown into a completely new environment, himself.
"Jesus, it reeks in here. Smells like cinnamon," Aaron wrinkles his nose, wandering back in after his own media duties were done, finding Sasha all alone in the locker rooms.
"It does?" Like he can't tell the room smells like the equivalent of someone knocking over a Yankee Candle into an open fire.
"Yeah, like an awful lot." Aaron scrunching up his nose, trying to fight off an incoming sneeze. "It's strong," he says without thinking, swallows before his eyes shift over to Sasha and then to the floor, "Not bad just... strong..." The I can get used to it is left unspoken between them.
"I like it," Sasha admits because if Aaron is confessing to things without thinking then he might as well too. They've known each other long enough.
"I can tell." Aaron snorts, "You reek too."
Sasha lets out a questioning little noise, tilts his head to the side as he silently urges Aaron to continue.
"You have no idea what cinnamon and cardamom smell like together, do you? I feel like I walked into a bakery when I should be at the gym right now."
"Is that bad?"
"For you? No, of course not," Aaron's eyes soften, and while his scent wasn't anywhere close to abrasive, it does lighten up just a tad bit in the presence of his pack Alpha. "For me? I'd rather dunk my head in a bucket of coffee beans." A bit of an exaggeration on Aaron's part but the wry grin he has on really adds to the fact he's just joking—just a little, maybe there's some truth hidden in there. He knows how Aaron is, the way he tries to downplay anytime he bristles about something. Peace and vibes, and all that.
So Sasha can joke as well, "Forsy's stall is over there," and motions his head towards it across the room.
"Oh, hilarious."
"If I was funny I would say jock."
"You know, what? I think I will hit the gym today, thanks for reminding me."
"Mmm, anytime." And when Aaron's half out the door he adds, "Ask the staff where they put the jerseys we used today!"
"I'm going! To the gym!" he echoes back, not bothering to turn around as he shuffles down the hall in a hurry, and decidedly not going in the direction of the gym. It's not surprising when he hears chatter pick up and shoes scuffing briskly into the direction of the laundry rooms.
#ask#instead of actually writing the things i wanted to get done i did this instead thanks guys#not to “controversially new hot younger girlfriend” maffhew but im gonna#timeline here doesnt make sense like quote wise so like you know#chat... matthew was not joking when he said well be seeing more of each other#he was fully intending to sit on that knot the first time he saw sasha#sasha is just dumb#god can you just imagine the ways in which maffhew would drive this nice polite alpha absolutely insane#can you imagine the way sasha accidently brushes his hand across the back of his neck because hes trying to wrap an arm around his shoulder#in camaraderie and sasha is so apologetic about it because dynamic classes in finland are intense and hes so remorseful about it#and then in the midst of all that maffhew just turns into this little purr machine and sasha is like oh i think i touched a button i should#not have touched at all oh god oh fuck#and maffhews like mmm? whyd you stop#pan to sasha silently freaking out#not to say sasha doesnt enjoy scruffing his omegas because they love it but he hasnt met one who enjoys it as much as maffhew does#and it kinda fucks him up#also speaking to ekky getting used to maffhews scent like oh boy i can see sooooo many ways that can go down like maffhew is respectful#of ekkys boundaries but also at some point ekky has had enough time to mope and for lack of a better word he does need to grow up#which is why maffhew starts off subtly you know standing on the dman side of the lockers for a few minutes. chatting up the guys over there#before ekky walks in you know leave a ghost of his scent around. its not strong and its not offensive but it certainly is there#eventually he just full on starts chucking his dirty socks at ekky after games#going oops sorry missed the bin didnt mean to snipe you (he absolutely did. he gets extra points if he hits ekkys face!)#sometimes a stray jersey too. if he really wants to make ekky mad he will just slingshot his biohazard-in-training-jock over.#i also think when ekky gets the yips when he starts pacing a little harder than usual when his chuckles turn a little too nervous#maffhew has enough and just like a worried hen of a men just manhandles ekky around in his arms and shoves at him till he puts his nose#in his neck and ekkys arguing the whole time like this isnt necessary im fine-#and matthews like right im sure thats why your teeth are chattering worse than a fucking woodchipper eh?#ekky cant really reply to that and maffhew tells him to just shut up and start sniffing#and it does help and he hates that he admits maffhew was right that he just needed to be clucked over by another omega#opening yapdoras box the lot of you. utterly awful. I HAVE THINGS TO DOOOOOOOOOOOO
7 notes · View notes
todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago
Text
i cant explain it but daigo being subtitled to just be like 'you're making me look like i have no balls' feels so illegal and wrong. hilarious but something's off
#snap chats#WAIT I HAVE TO INTERRUPT THIS POST WITH THE FUNNIEST SHIT#SO I WAS GETTING FOOD FROM MY SCHOOL'S DINING HALL AND YOU CAN WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT ON A SHEET YEAH#AND I SAID I WANTED A SAMMY AND FRIES OK BUT WHEN I GET MY PLATE ITS JUST FRIES#AND YK W/E OK I'LL JUST EAT THAT BUT THEN. WHILE IM LIKE. GETTING PIZZA TO SUB IT YEAH#I HEAR THE COOKS BE LIKE 'yoo why do we just have a sandwich here' AND THE BIN IT#AND I WAS LIKE 'was that a chicken sandwich cause uhhh <:)' AND THE WOMAN WAS JUST ':OOO IM SO SORRY'#LIKE DAWG /IM/ SRRY I FEEL BADLKAJLJ but yeah. they were nice enough to make me another one 😭#ok. back on topic with this fuckin post SORRY. i just have all these potatoes and a pizza to eat with this sadnwich now#i didnt eat breakfast or lunch so its ok. moving on#watch me explain it lol. i think its just cause its hard fr me to imagine daigo even saying balls like that. in jp or english#like he just doesnt have the Oomph to do it like the kansai bitches#see this how i know jo from kansai.... that easy as balls to imagine...#LIKEIM TELLING YOU THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO CAN SAY BALLS AND MEAN IT ARE KANSAI/EAST COAST BITCHES#in regards to eng its the accent... you just put a heavy mphasis on the b yk... any east coast bitches know what im talkin bout#or am i insane.it could be both idk#its cause in context he looks so meek like no !!!!! you dont be shy about balls talk !!!!!!!#I JUST IMAGINE HIM SAYING IT SO POLITE LIKE NO !!!! YOU HAVE TO SAY IT WITH FEELING. WITH YOUR BALLS#anyway daigo bb ily and i care for you but youre not hard enough to say balls#which is the most insaane thing i could say considering Daigo And His History but yk... im right...
32 notes · View notes
fingertipsmp3 · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
This is the spiritual successor to Four Seasons Landscaping. To me.
#the political career of rishi sunak over the past two years is something that is absolutely fascinating to me#mans kicks off the mass resignation of virtually everyone of relevance in the johnson government just for a shot at power#manages to climb over everybody else in the leadership campaign; loses at the last hurdle to liz truss#(the human embodiment of a soggy ball of iceberg lettuce you left in your fridge and forgot about)#when truss’s premiership imploded he was right there to… further cock things up?#his highlights include hiring back a cabinet minister who had literally been fired the previous day#after 18 months; his party finally got sick enough of him violently hydroplaning down the highway to hell that they threatened him#with a vote of no-confidence#so he went out in the rain and went straight to charles iii of all people to ask him to dissolve parliament. as you do#and called a general election WHILE STILL IN THE RAIN and while the most unserious music imaginable played in the background#because i guess he thought ‘if i’m going down i’m bringing all of you with me’ ?????#knowing that unless something absolutely bananas happens; he is essentially handing over the country to keir starmer mind you#and then today someone placed him in front of a morrisons sign in such a way that his big head makes the sign look like it says ‘moron’#and photographed him as such. i’m obsessed. no notes#i will not miss this idiot but i can’t say i haven’t been entertained. because i have#i’m like genuinely impressed with how much the tories have managed to fuck up in so many different ways#to be honest ever since david cameron resigned and walked off humming; nothing has been normal here#i mean things were bad before that but good god#personal
16 notes · View notes