#I AM NOT SCHIZOPHRENIC

[ieat-clovers]

normalize talking to your plushies again because wdym i’m schizophrenic 😞😞

[worm-brainzz]

what the fuck my dad told me to take the pooh pathology test and uh.. SINCE WHEN WAS I SEEING SHIT

[ewwap]

Irl ghost/entity NSFW experience???

Ok I've had some crazy experiences recently and idk where to talk about it so I'm just gonna ramble about it here

About a year ago I woke up with something/someone rubbing my back. It was really comforting. I was asleep and then woke up but didn't open my eyes, and it took me a while before getting the nerve to turn around and see nothing. It stopped after that and I was kinda sad it did.

That happened again once or twice in isolated events a few months apart until I noted my furniture moves slightly?? It's very slight, like my swivel chair turning slightly where I question if it's really moving.

Sometimes lights will flicker or dim for a second when I enter rooms, sometimes randomly when I'm in a room.

Then this morning, I woke up and was doing that thing where I was awake and still had my eyes closed--and for some reason, I had the feeling someone was in front of me? He talked to me (I don't remember what I said) and I reached forward, like kinda in front of my head, and there was a dick. Like, I felt a dick. I opened my eyes and there was nothing, but I felt it. And it didn't alarm me, the presence actually made me feel safe ngl. I don't know what came over me but I started stroking it, feeling it, and teasing him--sometimes I would open my eyes just to see I was jerking off the air. He was about to come when I stopped, and dude, I asked him to fuck me. Did I say it out loud? Maybe, I don't know.

And I felt it. I felt him enter me, I felt him moving in and out of me. It felt really good. I was just ass up feeling a phantom dick. I kept asking him to rub my clit, and sometimes I would feel, like, this ripple of please on my lil dick, and I felt like I was gonna come and then it would stop. This happened for a while until I fell asleep again, and I woke up very horny.

Idk why I'm adding this last part, but all of this started before I began to develop sort of a monster kink. And now that I have it this happens.

Tumblr, am I going insane? I hope not cause, to be honest, I welcome this. I probably am though, or more likely I was dreaming. But the thing is I don't feel things in my dreams, I felt this. If he's real I challenge him to appear while I'm fully awake but goddamn I think I'm going insane.

[sweetpupii]

I hate my mind

[whisperingzeltus]

Can people stop fucking using the term “delulu” or using “delusional” improperly can people stop making light of symptoms of mental illness if you are not affected by it.

It is like saying “Oh I’m so OCD” for just wanting everything to be clean or something

Shut the fuck up

You are not delusional just for having a crush on somebody who does not like you back or for wanting something that is generally unlikely to happen

Stop using mental illness as your quirky little fun language I bet the second you see someone who experiences delusions you will get extremely uncomfortable and want them out of your sight

[vampire-biter]

Does anyone else have all of the listeners for redacted “react” to the audios in real time as if it’s some sort of gacha reaction video with

1. ships for listeners with other listeners (or even characters with other characters *cough cough* Poly!Damn And Poly!ShawPack *cough cough*)

2. playful bickering between characters / play fighting

3. laughing at jokes they make

4. making fun of a certain voiced character

5. makes new headcannons during said hand out seshes I guess you could call them

6. even have oc characters hang out with the listeners

7. LITERALLY ACT OUT ALL OF IT WHILE ITS HAPPENING-

or am I do mentally insane for this to be relatable.

Kinda weird rant below???

It’s not even just redacted videos it’s every video I watch.

I’ve started going places doing this btw just to survive things like going to the store or eating food out at a restaurant.

Just not moving my mouth anymore when I’m just talking to them yk?

If I’m talking to another person I’ll pretend they’re another character or fucking listener, IVE STARTED DOING THIS OVER MESSAGES AS WELL??

LIKE IM TALKING TO MY FRIEND ON DISC OR WTVR AND IM JUST LIKE

“Honey just texted me srry hold on.. I’ll be back angel.”

LIKE WHAT??

AND THEN I REALIZE IM DOING IT AND IM JUST LIKE

“Hey. So that’s not normal.”

AM I MENTALLY SANE?????

[burned0utstar]

The things in the dark are staring again. They have no eyes but they see me, they watch my every move.

I do not know how to make them leave. I do not know if this will pass or not.

[gayorphancannibal]

everyone loves making autism and autism creature and "acoustic" and schizo jokes until an actual autistic or schizophrenic person shows up and all of a sudden they're weird and creepy and gross. Either grow the fuck up or shut your mouth.

[calp0sa]

helloo hihihi!!!! i just wanted to ask if i could use ur art as inspo for my artsyle?? i love your artstyle soo much!!

thank you sm for asking :] i am okay with slight!!!! SLIGHT!!!! inspiration. its kinda just a me problem because my artstyle is such a crucial reflection of my identity so seeing people take heaaavy inspiration from it puts me on some depersonalization shit and makes me feel like the aw hell nah spunch bob took 40 benadryls image. its the same reason i dont allow reuploads lawl

[gardenof-fears]

〟ぽぴぽぴぽ　ぽぴぽ～〝

[wickjump]

okay guys im seriosuly really confused and want an answer. genuinely What is a kin. is it like a character you really really relate to. is it some sort of "i identify as/along the lines of this character" ordeal (like either due to being a system alter/having a dissociative disorder/something else or just because why the hell not). or like. "i just really like this guy a lot so they go on the kin list". or like? "i relate to moments they have but not them entirely"?? guys please. i might have asked this before but my memory is dogshit. pleaseee give me a genuine answer.

like i heavily relate to chara and project onto them but i dont identify as or along the lines of them in any way. is that like a kin. is that what kinnie means. would i say inmy pinned that i kin chara because the amount of projection and "me fr" is a lot i think. but i dont identify as chara. i just have like a lot ofsimilar traits and when i was 11 i went "haha me" and im 19 and i still go "haha me". guys please. wjhat is a kinnie PLEASE TELL ME....

[cadaverskey]

if i'm being entirely honest i find the term "spiritual psychosis" annoying at best. it makes me feel as though i, as someone with schizoaffective disorder, need to work extra hard to "prove" my spiritual beliefs are valid.

here's the thing. my spirituality has always been and will always be flavored and colored by being schizoaffective. even when i was an atheist i could not untangle the two. there's never going to be a way for me to know where the line is drawn between my spiritualism and my psychosis. for example i will probably never shake the idea that i died and was resurrected, and that event holds SIGNIFICANT spiritual meaning for me, even on antipsychotics, even when i can recognize that yes, it's probably the remains of a delusion.

so please tell me, why is it anyone else's business if i incorporate that into my religious practices? it harms no one and gives me one more reason to rejoice. if it started causing actual problems, putting me in danger, causing me distress, bringing along disorganized thinking or anything of the sort, that's when it would be time for me to get help. but really and truly i would not want random people im not close with to tell me to get that help, especially if their only clues into my mental state come from my spiritual practices. i am not a dog to be taken to the vet. sometimes people are psychotic and we exist in your communities and we have religious beliefs and you have GOT to suck it up and allow space for us, however our conditions affect us and our practices.

it's also just. buries my face in my hands. you can just say psychosis, you don't need a special term for it. again it just makes me feel like i'm being singled out and not being taken seriously because there's a long LONG history of psychotic/schizospec people having our mental illnesses used as reason to disregard us. please just mind your business.

[claiestve]

im back on my fic grind, as a matter of fact, request any fic u want IM READY

[ayathefly]

@cable-salamdr's sonic x phase has been so fascinating to watch LMAOO, THIS SHOW IS DRIVING HIM FUCKING INSANE. cable gibberish has become my new favorite language

i wonder how he'll feel when he gets to tails in season 3.

[sangfielle]

being even somewhat politically literate and aware of the world around you will make you feel crazy about 100% of the time

[rainbowtvz]

*grits teeth*

i do not want to discourse here or anywhere anymore but it does kind of affect me as a transmasc bi person when i see shit that indirectly misgenders me and implies that bisexuality is an icky no good word and identity and you have to be bi and gay and bi and lesbian and bi and straight at the same time or support them or you're an evil stinky stinky terf like... hello where am, i