#I ABSOLUTELY LOATHE YOU'

[hekateisconfused]

I find it so fucking funny how when I was in my undertale phases, like everyone, Sans was my favorite character, now I CAN'T FUCKING STAND HIM. LIKE. HOOOOOHHHOHOHOHOHH I HATE HIM. I HATE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH. I GET SO VISUALLY ANGRY WHEN HE'S ON THE SCREEN THAT IT MAKES ME LOWKEY HATE THE GAME BUT I GOTTA GO BACK BECAUSE I'M A COMPLETIONIST.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!

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[hanfocus]

😏🤟😁🤳

[paulic]

September got me acting like this already

[sleepanonymous]

I got tagged by the beautiful @autumns-veil to post 5 songs I've had on repeat recently 🖤🖤

These were the first 5 songs on my repeat playlist on Spotify 😅 It's been a while since I did an ask game, uh... no pressure tagging: @lifemod17 @stellasplendens @loveinthemindpalace @moonchild-in-blue and anyone else 🖤 show me some cool music

[shesmore-shoebill]

The fact that Angela provided an answer so good that everyone immediately knew it was right + Amanda didn't even know it was the right answer but chose it anyway is already great. But this whole round is made even better by the fact that Angela, WITH IT AS HER ANSWER, keeps emphasizing how baffling Amanda's inexplicable deep seated hatred for Vanessa Lachey is and how this is something that's just. Known. between them.

Like we already knew they failed to watch the Love Is Blind Reunion together bc of how much Amanda hates Vanessa Lachey so Angela's descriptions and her baffled "i just. have never seen amanda hate anyone." "she's not that bad" "SHE IS" speaks so much to the conversations they've clearly already had about this exact subject. And its funny as hell.

[sarcasticsra]

HE COULDN’T THINK OF ANY FACTS.

Hyperfixation and passion got married and are taking care of all of the interests! Elias’ brain is just absolutely flooded with dopamine right now, it’s the BEST.

“A strong sense of pleasure slightly tempered by conscience sounds pretty fun.” Trapp is always 100% correct. My god this man is so quick and talented. More Trapp on D20 2kforever.

Conscience understanding the place self-loathing can come from and shrinking it back into more helpful “you fucked up but you’re going to fix it” guilt, accountability. Goddamn seriously self-loathing evolving from guilt Brennan you’re a goddamn genius.

Impulse and hyper vigilance have gotten divorced and remarried 17 times at least already, you can’t convince me otherwise.

Way to go, Elias. I knew you could do it, buddy.

[zhongrin]

dick owners who are bodily able and living in an enviromentally capable conditions to flush toilets in a shared bathroom but don't,

fuck you 🖕🏻

[jacksprostate]

the prototypical child and or grown man who greatly misinterprets fight club has a preternatural hold on most tumblr fight clubber's minds and i think it's time we all let it go... firstly if you're imagining a 13 year old please realize that dunking on 13 year olds because they have bad critical reading skills is more and more pathetic the older you get. secondly even if these people exist they're not on tumblr and will not be disturbed by your actions because they'll never see them. thirdly, defining yourself and your interpretation in Opposition to another without taking care to understand why that interpretation developed beyond 'well they're just evil' will only leave you cut off from people. it is better even, to understand exactly why they think terrible things, what leads them to it, than to just dismiss it and position yourself as the good to their bad guy, defined by doing whatever you consider opposite. fourthly? fourth? using 'this movie is GAY and or liked by women actually, ooga booga, you're gonna HATE that hahaha' as an argument reinforces the idea that these things are stigmatized and things they should hate, and even contributes to the (very flawed) perception that these things are 'stealing' from them, and once again reinforces negativity. it's pointless. certainly, write your analyses and reference the interpretation, even analyze it, but take care to consider whether you're acting on solid ground or performing against an unpresent bogeyman for the cheers of your peers, and consider whether you want to gain cred by shitting on others, even if it's the conceptual ghost of a shit person.

[maevelin]

I am screaming here!!! The UNRELIABLE NARRATOR!

THE DENT! THAT FREAKING DENT! THAT COFFIN DENT!

It drove me crazy in season one! I was like....No, what is that? Is it abstract art of something? I could not understand it!

And during that scene in S1, the part where Louis was reassuring Claudia that everything was alright and it was over and NOW IT MAKES SENSE!

And the timeline is so screwed up in Louis head because MEMORY IS THE MONSTER and he remembered throwing Lestat's old coffin on the road and it was meant to be such a monumental moment for him and the BLACK COFFIN PREDATED IT! THE DENT WAS THERE!

My mind is just exploding right now! It makes sense, the dent!

I can't believe there is only one episode left and I can't believe that it may even give us MORE INSIGHT or ANOTHER TWIST because this is not over yet.

And do not let me start on the rock garden...DO NOT!

[daemon-in-my-head]

I'll never be over Sally calling her own son a dreadful child or saying she should've ended him before he was even born. I don't give a single flying fuck about the crimes he's committed (at least in this context). Nobody should talk about their child like that. And you know this absolutely vile woman probably told him this and much worse shit straight to his face. She said all that shit to a small kid that was presumably still innocent at that point. Aka, she most likely told her child it would be better if he were dead. Aka, she told her kid to kill himself. A FUCKING CHILD. And thx to the Belladonna lying around in their kitchen, I'm still convinced she tried to kill Gortash once he came back.

'Sold him cuz they needed money' my ass. You made your own kid, the person you were supposed to protect, pay for your own fuck ups and debts and mistakes and send him straight to hell. LITERALLY. FOR SOMETHING HE HAD NO FAULT IN. AND THEN THIS THING HAD THE AUDACITY TO TRY ND KILL HIM.

The absolute hatred and disgust I have for this fictional woman. I despise Bhaals A+ parenting, but this woman is worse than the fucking lord of murder. Imagine being more loathsome than an evil deity whose whole bit is goddamm murder and death. I swear to fucking god-

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

If a ghost says it, you have to do it.

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[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 9 thoughts

whew! i had a busy day so it's nice to unwind with some scully and mulder time. although by the end of the episode i didn't feel very unwound tbh. it was still time spent with the babygirls, so i can't complain.

so we start with some volcano research. my only note here was "i know a geologist" which is true! shoutout to my one professor. you were chill but i hated that class.

there's a dead guy in the volcano which tbh doesn't seem too surprising... i mean volcanoes are very deadly. but it seems to be one of the dudes involved with the project so that's weird because why would he go down there?

there's this stream going on of the inside volcano and something is disrupting it... hate to see a streamer interrupted :(

then we had the title sequence but for some reason i was wondering, do you think if they got married they'd hyphenate their names... scully-mulder... mulder-scully... does it roll off the tongue? hmm...

so firewalker (the title of our episode) is a robot that goes into the volcano. noted.

here i wrote "holy fuck scully is beautiful". all she was doing was standing there but man.

the scientist who has come to them requesting help is like, this lead scientist named trepkos started this project, and scully says "i always heard he was brilliant", which raises the question: why is scully keeping up with volcano science? nerd

at this point the visiting scientist was explaining how he and trepkos had a professional breakup kinda thing and i'm very sorry for them but i genuinely could not take my eyes off of scully. hope they work it out or whatever. i have bigger priorities.

she wants to get out there and investigate but mulder says "i don't think it's a good idea for you to go" AUGHHH. i am wailing and tearing my shirt. she says that she's fine!!! really!!!

and he has this look on his face that says "i cannot tell this woman what to do, even after she just woke up from a coma, and i never will be able to" and he's very right in that regard

HELICOPTER TIME! mulder is such a gentleman helping her climb out

she has very messy hair at this point and the scientist seems a lot more concerned about his equipment than the fate of the people trapped inside the compound and she seems so thrown off by this

next we have some BIG ASS FLASHLIGHTS!!!! WOOHOO

at this point i made a note that i think i might have been going feral because mulder also looked SO good prowling around that creepy base. and i don't take back my observation but i will psychoanalyze it a bit later. reluctantly.

a creepy dude is hanging around the corner. OH SHOOT he tries to bash mulder's head in and he is MAD "do you always greet people this way?" LMAOOO he took it personally

the other scientists in the base seem to regard the missing trepkos as a threat... hmm...

i really like this jesse character, who is a student and is here to do some research with her advisor

mulder asks for the data on the research trepkos has been doing and she says he destroyed his field journals and computer discs. ahh, computer discs. my old friends. i used to have some games on discs when i was a kid. positive memories.

mulder sees scribbled in some of the notes trepkos didn't destroy that he had written about a "new life form" which honestly kinda happens a lot. like people are always discovering new life forms but the gag is they're beetles. everyday we find new species of beetle. they just won't stop coming. so i'm thinking, well they wanted this to be all dramatic, but statistically it's probably just a volcano beetle this guy found.

mulder and scully have an exchange and again i'm distracted by her freckles but she says he's being paranoid and i'm like. yeah that's kinda his whole deal. mulder being paranoid is like a fork spotted in the kitchen.

so the other scientist who was checking on his equipment was, at this point, killed by trepkos. with a rope. and we get the great closed captions "(neck cracks) (body thuds on ground)" which were very descriptive of the whole process

mulder and scully are having a science based argument on the probability of a silicon-based life form and it was really funny to me because it was a nerd off. and frankly i wouldn't go into a science debate with a doctor but mulder is going full steam ahead. it's getting heated and i'm like damn does this ever lead to them kissing because i can see it happening. anyway she's like no trepkos did not discover a silicon-based life form (spoiler alert: he did)

he's looking around like damn. i'm glad she's back but she's such a pain in my ass <3

scully goes to talk to jesse by knocking on her door and asking to chat and then not waiting for an answer and coming in because that is my girl!!!

jesse says trepkos stopped taking his pills that treat his bipolar disorder and he started being weird, saying they polluted his mind and that she was "polluting his body" which has... implications i prefer not to think about?

(why must we make erotic the bond between a student and their thesis advisor? there is no stronger connection! but. not in this way, tv writers, not in this way. i mean Maybe it wasn't meant that way but it seemed like it was)

mulder is streaming the descent into madness of trepkos because he recorded his ramblings which is probably what my friends on my private story think each time i post. but he's going on about finding a silicon-based life form.

this whole time one of the scientists has been very noticeably coughing and losing his voice and i knew it was gonna go somewhere but all of a sudden he collapses. and mulder yells for scully who is undergoing her shift to Doctor Mode. but we see his neck... pulsate? is that the best word to describe it? augh i don't want to even think about it so we'll leave it there

(jesse was also looking super suspicious but i liked her...)

anyway they put the sick guy on a stretcher and he's down and out until he isn't, and now he's making a RUN for it. he runs and runs and falls in a ditch until a THING takes over his body and explodes. i thought it was a worm at first and it was sososo gross i started sweating. i do not like body horror. the things i endure for these two.

so scully's doing some testing and she's like, yeah this is a silicon-based fungus. and poor jesse is having a nervous breakdown because she has been in this base for 8 months and she just wants to go HOME but now they have to quarantine and i felt so bad for her.

then i remembered the line about her "polluting his body" and things were adding up... and they were NOT looking good for her... no... i cannot do this...

scully's really worried about jesse which is justified because this poor girl is freaking out. but mulder is really worried about scully! he wants to go look for trepkos and he's making excuses why she shouldn't come and finally settles on the need to autopsy the body which he seems to both genuinely believe and also say to keep her back at the base

she knows he's being protective so she says "i'm here and i'm not going anywhere" which is sweet but girl you were in a coma. they had your gravestone made. you are lucky he has not put you in bubblewrap entirely. you can't blame the man for needing you to be safe!!!!

he says he's counting on her and grabs her shoulder with some heavily lingering eye contact that, when i see in gif form, i will surely slam the reblog button upon because. good lord.

jesse is talking to the other guy and he says something like "do what we said" and i'm thinking oh man, they're gonna try to get mulder (spoiler alert: they did not quite do that)

the guy is like "you need a guide to go get trepkos" and i'm even MORE suspicious but his reasoning kind of does make sense- it is a volcano maze, after all- still, when mulder goes with him i was tense

BUT THEN he immediately gets shot with a FLARE GUN? which i did NOT see coming. and trepkos emerges from the back of the volcano caves all burned and wild-looking.

he's covering the newly dead body with gasoline and mulder's asking why he's trying to kill him twice when we see the parasite wriggle in his neck (GAG) so then he shoots him with ANOTHER flare to burn up the evil creature. and he's explaining how if you're exposed to the parasite's spores you're gonna be sick...

and scully is back at the base with jesse... who was exposed... so she's not going to be safe...

and we see jesse in her room gagging and convulsing... oh man... it's not looking good....

trepkos is not letting mulder leave, but mulder does not give a fuck LMAO he says "you're gonna have to shoot me then" and goes to walk out... this man was really thinking "they are NOT gonna take scully from me again" and i know that is exactly right!!!!!

NOOOO the lights go off in the compound........... NOOOOO JESSE ATTACK.....

she's handcuffing her and scully together!!!!!! but scully was smart enough to get her behind a door really fast before jesse collapses and the fungus explodes...... but the handcuffs... was the door open a crack?? was it enough to get her infected???!?!?

mulder BURSTS in to see her handcuffed and she keeps repeating "i'm okay, i'm okay" but he must be so shocked because he asks "you alright?" and gently cups her face and at this point i wanted to do some powerful screaming to let out the things i was feeling

we see trepkos come in and look at jesse's body and he says that he told her how this experience would change her life... and i'm getting callbacks to when mulder told scully it would be a nice trip to the forest, but then the whole evil bugs thing happened in s1 ep20... and i am filled with a deep sadness...

so the duo has been sentenced to a month long quarantine, which i'm sure had to absolutely drive them wild. but i think my mutual wrote a fic on this subject so i just simply have no choice but to go read it now! and i assume that, since there are more seasons, the spores did not actually infect them

(and mulder, who was earlier suggesting time off for scully, must be some mix of terrified that any day now the symptoms will start showing and the end will be near, deeply satisfied that she has been forced into getting rest and healing like he wished, and regretting his words that she should take a break, because here she is taking a break. with him. and they're driving each other crazy)

we see trepkos hiking back into the volcano maze with jesse's body and it was actually really sad :(

overall a good episode, another one in the vein of s1 eps 8 and 20 where there is some sort of contagion and we must figure out from where it started and to whom it has gone... but the formula in these episodes keeps me on the edge of my seat and allows for a convergence of doctor scully and protective mulder, two things i am deeply invested in seeing. and seeing mulder try and keep her away from the case after her whole incident made me emo as hell!!!! he is never going to let her out of his sight again unless he has to go keep her safe by finding the wild man in the volcano!!!!!! and even that backfired!!!! ugh my heart!!!!! i love them so deeply!!!

rip my girl jesse i thought u were rad in the brief time we knew each other

[uncanny-tranny]

The biggest saving grace I feel I've done is to get into death positivity, to learn to appreciate death. It's definitely not going to help for many, but I have found that not stigmatizing my own interest and desire for death has greatly helped. Being able to interact with death not as a punishment, but as a way to express humanity has been truly what has made me feel more human. I no longer want to feel ashamed of this aspect of myself, and it's made me want to live. Death has done unto me life.

[some-stars]

sure do love reading posts about how zionism is a special, different kind of colonization that makes it actually fine and okay :)

like there were a LOT of antizionist jews in the early 20th century. there are a lot of us now. and it’s not because we just don’t Understand the Complexities of the israeli political situation. it’s because all forms of zionism, from their inception and to this day, have all always been morally wrong. israel was founded with a massive act of ethnic cleansing and murder because there is no other possible way to move large amounts of people into a place where other people already live that ensures the people arriving have all the political power. there was never a Good israel and there was never a Good zionism. it was rotten from its inception and it cannot be fixed or repaired or cleansed of the blood it demands.

you can dress up your explanations in lots of long paragraphs but the actual definition of all zionism is simply “we get to force everyone who was already living in this place to leave or be subservient to us or simply be killed.” there is nothing more or else to it, and there never has been, in any place or time.

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Fuck I hate being an adult. I need a more adult adult to help with the volatile emotional situation.