#He doesn't want to let her go he can’t and he’s so worried. And she gives him a “sedative”.

[illshakeyouallnightlong-dean]

Take Me To The Sun (Rewritten)

I know everything. The things beyond weapons drops across the border. And yet I stay quiet. Until I can't. Being a marked one, being a friend of Xaden Riorson doesn't mean I am granted unfiltered access to information of what goes on beyond Navarre's walls. But it should when lives are lost and rules change. My compassion doesn't make me weak. My dragon chose me. I am meant for more.

A/N: This fic is updated on my AO3 as well. Here. Happy Reading! Gonna try to update once or twice a week but as you know, life happens so we'll see! xoxo K

The quadrant is in chaos. 

Finding out who is alive, who we all lost - it’s a mess. The only thing I can focus on, however, is the fact that they aren’t back. 

He isn’t back. 

I wish I could comfort you, flare. Rathnait whispers to me in the library of my mind. For a brief moment, guilt consumes me. Gripping my throat with the threat of tears and a scream. A failure of a rider -  not able to even give her a reprieve from the onslaught of my emotions. That she must feel it all with me down our bad. 

A low growl as she narrows those golden eyes of her’s at me. Talons tick nervously on the flight field, vigilant over my every move and breath. All I can do is stare at my dragon vacantly. Streaks of dark copper highlighted her grace, her beauty - running down the length of her neck and down each of her legs. Rathnait was a sight to behold, and I was only grateful to be considered worthy to be hers. Her scarlet colored scales glistened in the setting sun, as if mirroring the sun itself in all its bright glory. Her swordtail flicked in the air back and forth, as if it were involuntary. We must not get ahead of ourselves, you would feel it if something happened to him. Don’t you dare assume what I can and can’t handle. Shutting me out only hurts you in the end.

My shaky hands outstretch, desperation to run them against the warmth of her scales. Her nose to my chest, needing to feel the steadiness of her breath on my clammy self. She nudges me gently, trying all she can to ground my spiraling thoughts. 

How could this be happening? How did it come to this? All that will be left is bitter words and unspoken longing for a man who didn’t choose me.

~

“Xaden is already bending the rules with bringing Violet along, I can’t ask him to risk your well being as well,” Garrick murmurs in my ear as we watch the tense showdown between Dain and Xaden. Ignoring the sting in my chest is a feat itself, having to wrinkle my nose to rid myself of  the tears that threaten to fall.

“You're not even gonna try, after everything? You just expect me to watch you go? You’ve been keeping secrets, Garrick. This seems like part of one of them.” Stepping away from his hold, the warmth long gone from the two of us. My desire to punch him, to yell at him at the very least - gods why doesn’t he ever choose me? 

Rathnait glowers at both Garrick and Chradh, his brown scorpion tail - the irritation evident in her golden gaze. Unrelenting. Every tone, every unsaid word she analyzes and catalogues. Watching me get hurt right before her very eyes, and not in a physical way is something she doesn’t stand for. Teeth as sharp as steel snap towards Chradh, the brown dragon pulls away in shock towards the obvious display of aggression. Garrick’s jaw shuts and clenches at the show the dragons are putting on, his ever composed features faltering at the anguish I knew he could see in my eyes, could hear in my voice. 

Just say the word, flare. I’ll teach him to treat you with more care. Rathnait snarls at Chradh as he tries to nudge her affectionately. I don’t want to put her in an uncomfortable position, to push away her growing care for Chradh. You let me worry about that. Chradh knows you are the one I chose, the one I will always look out for.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I wish we had time to talk more, but right now I would rather know you’re safe with the rest of your squad. Your anger towards me is worth it if I am guaranteed your survival,” I watch as he makes sure his flight gloves are secure, flexing them before flickering those earth toned eyes towards me. My heart cracks a little bit more - all I want to do is scream. To shove him and get him to see that this is hurting me, is crushing me. How much more can I let slide? How much more can I take?

“And what about you? What if you don’t come back?” The very thought is enough to have my knees lock and heart stutter. 

Xaden and Violet make their way towards their dragons. Squads have begun to launch to their respective posts. Dain and I are being waited upon by Second Squad. 

“I’ve survived too much to lose now. I’ll be back and we can talk - I’ll tell you everything,” Garrick promises, stepping forward to plant a soft kiss on my temple. Clutching his flight jacket, I can’t help it as tears fall down my cheeks. 

“It seems like you might lose me though.”

 Turning around to follow my squad leader, ignoring the curses from Garrick, ignoring the way in which my squad watches me with grimaces and pity. All for fucking War Games, all for nothing. Being co-section leader means nothing to me, Dain can be in charge for all I care. Steps that feel like bricks on my feet, it’s all the energy I can muster towards the group, needing the familiar, needing their constant. Ridoc opens his arms, bringing me in for a brief tight embrace. Sawyer offers a wavering smile.

“Are you gonna be ok?” Rhiannon softly asks, wiping my wet cheeks with her hands. A shaky smile graces my lips, hands busy with making sure my own flight jacket and gloves are secure. It takes everything in me to not watch Garrick and Chradh take to the sky, having to believe that he’ll be ok, it’s all that I can allow myself to think of. 

Xaden didn’t even glance my way, Imogen or Bodhi - no one. As if the rest of the marked one’s had decided together who should and shouldn’t go. Guess I made the cut. My own relic curved over my fingers and wrist - briefly burning as if answering to my very thoughts. 

“Let’s go get this over with.” Quickly scaling up Rathnait, she chuffs at me, making sure I’m secure in my seat. Let’s go flying, Ray. Take me towards the sun. Sending my devotion to her down our bond. She launches quickly, wings flaring gloriously. The rest of the squad is quick to follow. 

I’ll always make sure you’re near it, flare. The light will never die in you, not even from this pain. 

At least she always chooses me. 

~

It’s been 10 days. 10 days of agony. 

I’m the only third year left. 

Expected to carry on my co-section leader responsibilities as if the absence of Garrick is a minor inconvenience. The early sun rises with a flourish of pinks, reds and oranges and all I can do is relish in this fleeting moment of peace. 

No one seems to care or notice that they aren’t back yet. My only anchor, my only comfort is from that of my dragon. Spending many hours against the curve of her back, staring up at the sky in hopes of seeing or hearing familiar dragons, of hearings wings. When I’m not near her, our bond is wide open. The familiar fire red tether in my mind ablaze with every thought and emotion that runs through us. A warmth of what I could only describe as security floods down the bond. 

We can’t worry about things that haven’t been confirmed yet, flare. She knows my true questions, the things that I can’t bring myself to ask or think about. You must think about today, where we will go. 

Graduation day. 

Today would be the day we’ve been waiting for since entering this school, assignments to outposts were being given, and by this evening I would be gone, my journey at Basgaith over. Turning away from the river, I make my trek towards the flight field. The few third years left of this school congregate, awaiting as Colonel Aetos and Commandant Pancheck begin the assignments. 

“Congrats on graduating, Section Leader. It is a shame that Wingleader Riorson and Section Leader Tavis aren’t here to accompany you.” Colonel Aetos nearly sneers at the mention of Xaden. The obvious disdain is unsettling as he rifles through different papers. “Ah yes, your assignment. Due to your signet and the savagery of your red swordtail - you’re being assigned to the eastern wing…specifically, Samara.” The grin directed at me is maniacal, a joke I’m not privy too, a dare. Rathnait snarls in my mind, unbridled rage igniting the very blood in my veins - but all I can do is take the papers from his hand, saluting in acknowledgement and walking away.

Where are you, Ray?  Hands tremble, the crinkling of paper beneath slender hands is all I can focus on as I sprint towards my room. Can’t be out in the open, can’t let them see, can’t let anyone see what will surely be my own falling apart. My own demise. 

You will not fall apart. An outpost is just a different place, as if you haven’t endured years of people hating the very ground you stand on. As if you haven’t been bonded to me. 

I make it to the middle of an empty hall that leads towards our sleeping quarters, knowing in a matter of moments the rest of the cadets will be awake to get into formation. Pressing the heels of my hand into my eyes, I can’t help but rest my back against the cool stone behind me. My own body feeling as if it had everything sucked out of me, the very air I breath feels strained.  

Samara is the front line. Trying to get the ever rising beat of my heart under control, I must not panic. I am a rider. I am Rathnait’s rider.

Are you afraid, flare? I shudder at her question, not wanting to admit the fear, the panic. But I know that she can feel everything, hear all that I think. 

They aren’t here. He isn’t here. A whimper escapes my lips, the reality of it all just crashing down like rubble. I will be going to Samara, there is no avoiding it, there is no changing it. While I had spent years trying to survive Basgaith, I would be sent to one of the most active posts in the region. 

“Section Leader? Ar-are you ok?” Dain Aetos stands before me, hands out as if approaching a scared animal. “We need to get to formation.”

I don't hate the kid, knowing that following the straight and narrow path is the life that is meant for some people over others. However, that doesn’t mean I want him to see me having a mental breakdown. Giving him a small nod, I manage to get myself to stand before fully looking at the Squad Leader. 

Something’s wrong. My own senses are beginning to go haywire. My signet. Only Xaden and Garrick knew. Command and Basgaith are under a different impression as to what it is. None of the other marked ones knew either. The manipulation and detection of emotions however was a daily venture, there was no turning it off, there was only controlling it and living with it and right now Dain Aetos was a mess. 

“I would ask you the same thing, what’s wrong?” Dusting off my flight leathers. I don’t miss the way he flinches at my question, his hesitancy. “Do I have to give an order to know?” Glowering at him - I am still a section leader. 

Taking a deep breath, he stands tall despite the sorrow in his eyes, “Xaden and the rest of the squad he took with him are being declared dead at formation.” I startle myself at the immediate sob that escapes my lips. My body has accepted what my mind cannot. “Leadership has been looking and there is no sign of them.” Feeling the agony of his own loss, it feels as if a tidal wave has pulled me under. The roaring from Rathnait in my brain feels as if it will explode any second. Dain’s grief, his regret all barrel into me with no filter, no shield. Rathnait’s confusion and rage down the bond. My own sorrow, my own heartbreak. There is no stopping it. There just is feeling it. Unaware of the stream of tears that roll down my face, the taste of salt jolts me out of the shock, the horror. 

“Round up everyone, squad leader. I’ll be at formation in a moment.” My voice doesn’t feel like my own, the assignment papers feeling like large weights in my hand. He turns away to head towards the Quadrant, “Dain,” I call out, sounding like a garbled mess. “Thank you for telling me.” His own eyes glisten with unshed tears as he nods. 

My flare. I hear her call out, though to reach out seems like so much energy, all I can do is let her in with no barriers, allowing her to be there in the comfort of my mind. I’m coming, flare. 

Standing at the bottom of the stone dias. Everyone in formation, I don’t bother to look around. There is no one here to look for anymore. There is no Wingleader, there is no co-section leader - there is just me alone at the front. 

We don’t even have our leader. What hope is there for the revolution? Rathnait has no answer for me. 

To look at my squad is the last thing I am able to do, not being able to endure their unsaid questions. Answers? I had none. Being known for being put together, not a hair out of place, no rumpled leathers, no dirt unless necessary was once a pride and pleasure I reveled in. I’m sure the current state of me was a shock. Strands of hair fell in front of my face, eyes dry and cheeks raw from the tears. 

Captain Fitzgibbons overlooks formation, reading off the death roll. “Violet Sorrengail.” A moment of silence as all eyes look to the stoic face of General Sorrengail. “Garrick Tavis.” My heart feels as if it bleeds on the very floor I'm standing on, flinching harshly at the reading of his name. “And Xaden Riorson.” Captain Fitzgibbon’s voice rings out echoing around the quadrant. 

“Well this is awkward,” a voice calls out. Gasps are heard around the quadrant, even command seems unsettled by what’s happening. My knees seem to be locked in place, unable to turn around and see what is going on. My breaths turn into small gasps of air - no no no it can’t be, I’m dreaming. Dain said. I need to wake up. Heavy footsteps approach behind me, and two individuals take up position on either side of me. A calloused hand brushes against my own. 

~

Angry steps make their way towards the leaders seated at the dias. Xaden Riorson commands the very space, as if he were part of leadership. Violet Sorrengail makes her stand next to me, and the presence of the person on the right of me is one I can’t pay attention to - no matter how badly I want to turn and look, no matter how badly I want to cry. Colonel Aetos is furious, cheeks flushed and furrowed brows do no favors as General Sorrengail questions everything that has been happening since the start of War Games. All directed towards the fumbling Colonel and Xaden.

“I was directed to take a squad beyond the wards to Athebyne and form the headquarters for Fourth Wing’s War Games, and I did so. We stopped to rest our riot at the nearest lake past the wards, and we were attacked by gryphons.” Xaden states, fists at his side as he looks at both General Sorrengail and Colonel Aetos. “It was a surprise attack, and they caught Deigh and Fuil unaware.” He pivots slightly, telling the wing the rest of what we don’t know. “They were dead before they ever had a chance.” My Wingleader looks at my briefly for the first time in what seems like years, for a moment there is a crack in his ever perfect expression. 

I must have blinked, I must’ve staggered. My knees crash against the hard floor for a moment before arms reach themselves around my waist to hoist me up. We lost Liam? We lost Soleil? Unable to hear anything other than the rushing of my own blood through my very veins, the beat of my heart as if it were to come out of my chest. Violet flits her hands around my face, her mouth moving but for the life of me I don’t know what she’s saying. 

Liam was so good. Too good. And just like that he is gone? 

“And we almost lost Sorrengail.” 

Violet’s eyes widen as she takes in the horror in my eyes. My friends were in trouble and I wasn’t there. I wasn’t there. Tears blur my vision, and all I can do is breathe through the rattling in my chest. 

I will never forgive you. Pushing the thought towards Xaden. Watching as his spine stiffens, for a brief moment the hurt is detectable in those onyx depths, but in a blink it vanishes. 

“Breathe,” a warm voice whispers against my ear, “ Or you’ll pass out.” The emotions of everyone in the quadrant are too much. However, Garrick Tavis’ were always those of beacons to me - I was nothing more than a boat lost at sea in this very moment. And yet how do I differentiate between him and me and our emotions when all this time I thought he was dead? I thought he was never to come back? How do I ever look at him the same way after leaving me behind? “Let go of me,” shrugging myself out of his hold, I get back into proper formation. Violet watches warily, unsure of what to do. “Go help our Wingleader, Cadet Sorrengail.” Anguish flickers from her emotional tether, being dismissed was something she didn’t think I would ever do to her. To treat her as a lesser. However, in this very moment, the very reality I have endured through seems pointless. There is no belonging to the marked one’s or to a cause or to the protection of Violet and Xaden. There is nothing but the chasm in my chest at every word being revealed, at every tether holding loss and grief. And the worst part of it all is that in a matter of less than 12 hours none of this will matter, Basgiath won’t matter - I will be long gone, a new post, a new death sentence. Like always, being forced to move on. 

Making myself numb is a simple yet effective aspect of my second signet. The dying of emotions is a strange and vacant liminal space in my mind. Gone are the bright hues within the library. The dimming of my own tether to Rathnait. The rest of questioning -  I don’t bother with the insistent touching from Garrick as he tries to get my attention. I don’t bother with the few glances from Xaden, and unfortunately I can’t be open to the bond between Rathnait and I - my cruel humanity unable to withstand her words at this moment despite her numerous attempts of ramming against my shields. I know it isn’t her fault, this hurt and sense of loss that I feel - but I’d rather be alone. 

With dismissal from command, Xaden and Violet get back into formation. There are words exchanged between them and Dain, but again why does any of it matter anymore? As Captain Fitzgibbons calls out the additional names to the amended death roll, there are no tears shed, there is only silence, deathly still silence. Commandant Panchek takes the stand and addresses what is left of the riders remaining. “Beyond military commendations, there are no words of praise for rider. Our reward for a job well done is living to see the next duty station, the next rank. In keep with our traditions and standards, those of you who have completed your third year will now be commissioned as lieutenants in the army of Navarre. Step forward when your name is called to receive your orders. You have until morning to depart for your new duty stations.” 

The orders I received earlier feel like lead against my breast pocket. I had received mine earlier as a taunt, a warning since command had already believed that my Wingleader and his squad were dead. My duty station was punishment for whatever it was that Xaden and Garrick had been involved in, what they are still involved in. 

“Garrick Tavis!” My heart feels like it lodges itself in my throat, as if it were to splatter all over the floor as I look at him, fully look at him for the first time in days as he strides towards the commandant. A new scar lines from his jaw to his temple, deep and red - fresh. His wide strong frame grabs the paper and lets out a breath as he reads the duty station he is assigned to before looking at me as he makes his way back to formation. For the first time, I note an emotion that is rare from him, from someone I have come to know as unwavering. 

He’s scared. Garrick Tavis is afraid. 

~

A resounding cheer goes up in the courtyard as we are dismissed from formation. Everyone has their new orders and I watch as Ridoc, Sawyer, Nadine and Violet gather each other into a hug. Liam should be here with them too, I can’t help but think. Soleil should be graduating with us. Violet tries to catch my gaze but I am not one for appeasing our lightening wielder tonight. A tall figure blocks my vision of the squad, and I know who it is without having to truly look up and see.

“Wingleader,” I nod, staring blankly across his shoulder. “What can I help you with?” 

Xaden raises his hands as if to grip my shoulder, or Malek forbid, pull me into a hug. He must second guess himself though as he falters and his hand hangs limply at his side. “We need to talk, the three of us. And I’m no longer your Wingleader, we’re equals. We made it, flare.” 

Whipping my gaze at him, lips pulled in a snarl. “Don’t. I was never your equal, I was someone who helped you all get away with whatever bullshit it is you’re doing. I was the scapegoat. I was the distraction.” With each word, rage bellows in my belly. My shields must be faltering between Rathnait and I, because I feel like decking him, hurting him. I don’t bother lowering my volume, all sense of decorum out the window as cadets make their way across the quadrant. “I’m not even your friend.” 

Xaden flinches at that. 

“That’s not fair, sweetheart,” A raspy deep voice comes from behind me, calloused hands attempt to grab my own. Ripping them out of his grasp, I can’t help but ram my elbow into his side, the sound of wheezing only slightly satisfying. Xaden attempts to help him but the glare I pin at him leaves him immobilized . 

“What is not fair, sweetheart, is being left behind. Is not being there to help. Is not being trusted after everything I’ve told you out of faith!” Whirling around to face him, Garrick struggles to fully stand upright after my jab. “And now it doesn’t even matter. Excuse me, I have to go pack.” 

Hurt. Regret. All that I can feel from the two shocked idiots. 

****

Shutting me out isn’t the answer, flare. Rathnait snarls in my mind. There is nothing my dragon hates more than to be purposely shutout from me. If I can’t reach your during moments of distress, how can I help you?

Sometimes I don’t want help, Ray. Sometimes I just have to feel it. Folding the rest of my clothes and putting away what few belongings I do have, I’m able to rest for a moment on the bed. The wooden figurine of Rathnait sits on the window, all I can do is watch it. 

Liam was so sweet. Eager to please, eager to excel - and training him was something that I actually found fun. He was the little brother I never had. Someone who could bring me back down from the emotional highs, someone who made me laugh when all Xaden and Garrick wanted to do was be serious. When he made the figurine of my dragon, Rathnait herself chuffed in amusement at how endearing she found Liam. He was just so filled with light that this hellhole had to swallow it up and take it away. It wasn’t fair. 

A knock echoes throughout the empty room. Already knowing what is to come, I steel myself for the inevitable emotional onslaught. Adjusting my new officer flight leathers, I wave my finger to open the door, staying close to the window. 

Both Garrick and Xaden are dressed in their new flight leathers as well. A pack and sleeping pad hitched over their shoulders. Remorse written all over their faces I don’t even have to use my signet for that. 

“Is it ok if we talk in here?” Xaden asks. Yelling from the graduated cadets echo throughout the halls, celebration in all forms was everywhere tonight. Glancing away from their hesitant stares, the sound barrier shimmers slightly overhead as Xaden shuts the door. With a heavy, burdened sight, he slides against the door and sits on the floor, legs outstretched. It’s the least put together I’ve seen from him. Garrick sits on the bed, glancing at the wooden figurine with a wavering smile before glancing at me. I don’t make a move to sit by him, my arms cross as I lean against the window bay. No one says a word. The friendship the three of us had, seems like it teeters on the edge of the cliff. Well it seems like I’m the one starting this.

“I thought you were all dead. That all I had left was the memory of disagreeing with Garrick before War Games and watching my Wingleader not spare me a second glance as he makes his squad when I was meant to be a section leader as well.” Bland words escape me, trying to say something other than the yelling that I want to dish out to them. “And knowing I didn’t even get to see Liam before he -“ I swallow the lump in my throat. “I’ve never asked, Xaden. I’ve never demanded Garrick tell me when I could easily hold it against him as someone he supposedly cared a lot about-“

“Care.” Garrick interrupts. Leaving no room for argument. “I care a lot about you, sweetheart. More than that. Don’t blame Xaden when I am just as much a part of this as he is. Be mad at me too.” His hazel eyes blaze with a fight I know he’s aching for. To yank the deadened words from my lips with something fiery, something that feels like more. Garrick doesn’t know what he’s asking for.

“You don’t think I’m mad at you too? Tavis, I am furious. I am heartbroken. I was resigned to a life without you, and now?” Gasping for air, I pound my chest for some sort of relief from the tightness I feel. Garrick is quick to try and help me but I raise my hand, ordering him wordlessly to stay put. 

“There are a lot of things I regret,” Xaden rasps, “You helped me, confided in me - and I didn’t do the same thing to you.” 

“I was ready to fight alongside the two of you if you had told me to. I would meet Malek with honor. I may not be like you or Imogen or Bodhi - that everything I feel is so much and bleeds with every word I say or person I interact with - “

“No, flare that’s no-“

“You act like I’m not even a marked one. That I am not a part of what you all are planning. I’m kept in the shadows so that command never suspects you all. You asked me to help train Violet. You asked me to be a constant, to be unwavering. For what? To be forgotten?” With each question, my shouts echo throughout my bedroom. Neither of them are able to meet my eyes. “I would die for Aretia.” The whisper in to the space between us hits their mark. The full realization of what I know - the understanding, make it’s way across their expressions, their emotions. Xaden rakes his fingers through his hair, clutching it almost painfully. Garrick staggers slightly, holding himself up by clutching the bed post. “And now? It’s too late. I have my duty station. Basgaith is done. My journey here is done.” 

I brush my signet along their emotional tethers, unable to break the habit of comforting them ever so slightly. Understanding that the two of them lost their brother, lost people that were a part of them. Garrick lets out a shaky laugh as he feels the familiar sensation of soothingness. 

“H-How did you know about that?” Garrick questions, eyes finally roaming over me in disbelief. 

“Did you not think I would know every time you would lie to me? That the drops you were making were all that you were doing? I don’t know anything else but the restoration of home, of our home? How could you not think I would defend that with every ounce of my life for you?” 

“It was never because I didn’t trust you.” Xaden looks at me with a resolve I don’t understand. He gets up slowly, standing tall. “If anything it was because I didn’t want to chance losing someone else we all cared about to. We lost Liam and Soleil too easily. I lost them. I’m the one who is responsible for you all.” 

Truth. Feeling his honesty. Feeling his belief. 

“Flare, if were to lose someone like you, too? You’re glue, you’re binding. You’re a bridge. The same way that Violet is.  You bring Navarre and Tyrrendor together with your compassion. With your grace and spirit. When others look at you, they don’t see a marked one. They see more.” A knuckle taps against his flight leather pants in agitation. "I took a chance and made a mistake and I’ll never be able to earn that trust back. But look into my tether and now that I’m so fucking sorry. That I fucked up.” Xaden pleads, “And selfishly I was looking out for my brother, knowing that if he lost you? There was nothing in this world that would bring him back.” His voice cracks as he looks over at Garrick, a hand on his broad shoulders. “I’d rather you be alive and hate me, whereas dead and I lose the two of you in the process.” 

A shudder makes it’s way past my lips, tears trailing down my cheeks. I felt exhausted, I felt confused and scared and so many other things and all because we we’re so fucking human it seemed like despite my signet, despite my bond with a dragon - I was still so susceptible to human experiences and emotions. 

“I’m being assigned to Samara,” I tell them, not being able to dance around that any longer. Both of them look at me with wide bloodshot eyes. 

“Say that again?” Garrick demands, making his way towards me. 

“Samara is my new duty station?” Confused as to their reactions. “I was assigned my station before the official formation. It’s a death sentence, one they thought they could give me since they thought you were dead and I was a loose end towards command.” 

Garrick and Xaden smile, both blinding and perfect. Garrick for the first time in what seems like ages, swoops me into his arms, clutching me tightly as he cradles the nape of my neck. He shakes in my hold, as if whatever energy he feels is suddenly constrained in his body. 

“We’ve been assigned there as well, we didn’t get to chose our station. I guess they forgot that they had put you there too,” Xaden laughs, watching the disbelief as I realize what this means. 

“You’re gonna be with me?” I whimper towards Garrick, burrowing my face into the crook of his neck feeling the tidal wave of emotions of all three of us. 

“Never leaving you, sweetheart.” He laughs again, rubbing his hands along my back, clutching my hair, doing anything he can to just touch me. It’s been ages since we’ve been near each other like this. I can feel Rathnait chuff in the back of my mind, her also understanding that she gets Chradh with her as well. 

“We get a second chance,” Xaden grins, although I know he means it more towards himself. 

“If by second chance you mean I get to be in, full in. Than yes,” I demand, untangling myself from Garrick, to look at both of them. Garrick clutches his hand in mine tightly. 

“You’re in, flare. However much you want to be involved in. Garrick and I will tell you everything, and from there -“ He nervously wavers, “From there you can fully decide what it is you want to do. There is no one else I’d rather station and fight alongside with than with you two. The three of us entered Basgiath together, we leave together.” 

Opening my arms, he rolls his eyes playfully - ever the grump. Garrick and I pull Xaden into our embrace, clutching each other tightly with relief. We weren't gonna go through death alone, we weren’t gonna suffer alone. Samara was meant to be our death sentence but maybe, just maybe - it wouldn’t be so bad. 

[beomiracles]

𝓚𝐈𝐒𝐒 𝓞𝐅 𝓓𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ “Can you grant me one more wish?” You don’t expect him to oblige, you don’t expect anything at all, in fact you would have been content with even a small twitch of his brow. But the man doesn’t say anything, instead he merely watches you, an almost expectant look striking his features.  You inhale, holding that last dying breath for a second before letting go. “Can you… Can you kiss me?”

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ wc, 3k ་༘࿐

𝓹airings reaper/entity!taehyun x gn!reader (written with fem in mind) 𝔀arnings angst, major character death, lots of crying, kissing.

#serene adds ✎.. HAPPY TAEHYUN DAY !! except this is not a happy fic because I seem to struggle with anything positive.. anyhow :3

“Please help me.” 

Silence. Nothing but an eerie stillness of silence followed your pleading words. You want to scoff, your eyes twitching as they fight to remain closed. There was no way this was actually going to work. You had been a fool to even consider the idea, much more actually try it. But in spite of your foolishness you were also utterly desperate. 

Just as you were about to give up, to slump back against the hard floor boards and accept defeat; just then, there was a shift in the air. A cold, ghost-like exhale. It hits your face hard, like that of a slap. Your brows furrow, your still shut eyes scrunching together. A shiver runs down your spine, and you do not dare move. — He had come. He’d heard your call and he’d actually answered. You could hardly believe it. 

The creak of a floorboard makes your eyes jerk open, your head snapping in its direction. From the salt spread in a messy circle, to the lit candle in the center, your gaze travels along the open book, over to the far corner of your room. — There, in the shadows, submerged in darkness but still definitely there. 

You swallow, the gulp echoing through the desolate air. “Please…” Your voice is hoarse, on the verge of cracking as you shift on the floor, your body twisting as you turn his way. Once again, your hands rub together as you beg him. — “Help me…” 

He takes a step forward, revealing his tall frame as it emerges from the shadows. God, he was beautiful. So it was true then. All of it had been true. — His face, sickeningly pale yet so alive, ethereal almost. His eyes are dark, shimmering with something you couldn’t quite place, something out of this world. The brows on his forehead twist, if only for a moment. 

Dressed in all black, a long cloak draped over his body as it sways by his feet. He looms over you, his presence demanding and stoic. You do not dare get up from your position on the floor, even as your knees burn and ache for relief. You would be sure to stay put. 

It seems as though he expects you to speak, his expression unreadable as he remains quiet. With a deep inhale you gather courage. “It’s…It’s my mother, she..” Your voice trembles, on the verge of tears you shake your head, blinking the pain away. “She is very ill — I can’t… Please, I need more time with her.” 

At first he doesn't say anything as he merely watches you with the same brooding expression. Your face falls, worry consuming you as you fear that he might disappear once more. He was your last chance, your last sliver of hope. — “Please, I’ll do anything!” Your hands reach for the cloak he wore, fingers curling around the fabric as you cling to him. 

A low, breathy sound, almost a laughter, is pulled from his chest. You freeze when his warm hand places on the back of your head, his touch firm but not forceful. “Time”, he drawls, and he sounds as though he hadn’t spoken in years, yet you find yourself entranced by the mere word. 

“Time can never be brought back. You cannot ask such a thing of the universe.” 

His words make your eyes widen tenfold. What was that supposed to mean, would he not grant you your wish? Would he refuse you, would he leave again, leave you with nothing but the despair of the day to come, and the agony of those that were. 

“Please! You have to help me, I already told you I’m willing to do whatever it takes!” Tears were streaming freely down your face now, ugly sobs rolling off your tongue, meddling with your speech. — He’s silent, quietly observing your weeping form from above. His hand leaves the back of your head, the almost soothing touch gone with it. 

He hums, a low and still sound. “You cannot harvest time for yourself. But you can give.” 

His words make your eyes light up, and you crane your neck in order to peer toward him. “Yes! Please yes, I’ll do it.” You were beyond hesitation now, far too desperate to even think about the consequences of your own actions. To give, that’s what you wanted. You wanted to give your mother time, time to spend with you, to do what she loved. That was what’s important, right? 

The man nods, and you find yourself immediately missing the warmth he provided when he takes a step back. “Very well. You shall have time.” As the words leave his lips an icy feeling shot through your chest, it makes you fall forward, barely catching yourself on two hands as you pant. 

It did not hurt, but it was cold, so very cold. 

And just like that, he was gone again, leaving you alone in your dark house, with nothing but a ring of salt, a candle and a book to show. 

But after that things changed. Your mother, once bedridden and ill, was now up and about. It was a miracle, that’s what everyone had said. The way she tended to her garden, made home cooked meals and even picked up crocheting again. — But most importantly, she smiled more. There was a different light to her face, a different joy to her laugh and a whole other woman within her body. 

Doctors said she wouldn’t make it another three months. But those months turned into a year, and then another one, and another one. Five years pass within the blink of an eye. Just as quickly as they had begun they had ended again. You would like to think that those were the best years of your life, you had everything you could have ever wished for right by your side. 

So why was it that you felt so cold? No matter how many hot showers you took, how many hours you spent under the sun or how long you wrapped yourself in your mother’s warm embrace you couldn’t seem to shake the icy feeling looming over you. — It has been that way since… You shudder at the thought of him, of his sickeningly beautiful face. You try to ignore it, you try to shake the uncanny feeling that something is wrong, very wrong. 

The dread that fills you, the sense of impending doom. Everyday you worry for your mother’s health, for her life, in spite of the way she radiated. You feared that it would all one day diminish into nothing. That just as quickly as it had come, it would be gone again. And as your worries grew larger, the cold seemed to strike harsher. 

Ice had frozen your chest by this point. It made no room for love in your now lonesome heart. You could not enjoy your time with your mother, for you feared that your own was running out. 

It was then, on the day that would mark the sixth year, that he returned. And just like he had back then, did he emerge from the shadows. 

The night was warm, but you could not feel it, for you had not felt warmth in a very long time. With trembling hands you tug at the blanket, wrapping yourself up in it as you try to create some sense of comfort. You would delude yourself into thinking that everything was fine, you would try to ignore the pestering cold. But it never seemed to quite work. 

And there it is, that subtle creak of a floorboard, ripping through the still air. You don’t have to sit up, nor do you have to turn your head to know who has come. His presence is just as demanding as it had been all those years ago. Back then, when you hadn’t understood the full extent of his words, their true meaning. 

“You cannot harvest time for yourself. But you can give.” 

And you had. You had given your mother time, you had shared whatever you had left for yourself, in turn trading places with her. Realization struck as his beautiful face came into view once more. He had not changed, for he was timeless, he seemed to be the only thing unreachable by the ever ticking clock that decides your fate. 

He takes a step forward, then another one and another one. Soon he stops by the edge of your bed, dark eyes peering down at your shivering form. — You swallow, “I don’t want to die.” It was the truth, you did not fear death, but you did fear the end of your existence. Your throat feels thick, tears building in your eyes as you shake your head. Perhaps you thought that begging him once more would prove successful. 

But he only hums, a soft almost melancholy sound. It makes your chest churn, the ice around you feels heavy. You could not die, not right now and not like this. How would your mother suffice without you by her side? She would be heartbroken. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. It wasn’t right… 

“Please I can’t-” He interrupts you by raising a pale hand, and you immediately fall silent. His face, once unreadable and stoic, now looks solemn. His gaze roams your trembling figure, the tips of his fingers brushing along your cold arm. 

“Can’t you see?” He says, his hand traveling to your chest, his palm flat against your heart. “You are already dead.” 

The words hit you like that of a wave crashing against shore. Dead? No. You weren’t dead, you were… You were… 

Your eyes drop to your hands, grey and lifeless as they clutch the blanket tightly. The biting cold made the tips of your fingers an almost pale blue hue. Suddenly it all made sense. Your vision blurs as you bring your hands to your face, studying them closer. The cold, it wouldn’t leave because it was all there was. Your lifeless self, a shell of who you were, walking amongst the living, an imposter. 

Your heart was not frozen, it was unbeating. Dead. You were dead. You had been since that night, all those years ago. With a shaky exhale you glance up to meet his dark unyielding gaze. It was impossible to read his expression. — “Why?” You croak, the question barely making it past your choked up throat. “Why now?” 

Why had he waited, why had he let you roam this earth for so long. — The man doesn’t answer, instead he extends his hand for you to take. You regard his pale and long fingers, waiting for you to lace yours within his. It was an invitation, one that would carry you to a world outside this one. You wouldn’t even get to say goodbye. 

“I can’t…” The whisper slips past your lips without second thought, the realization weighing heavy on your shoulders. You shake your head, the first droplet of tears rolling down your cold cheek. 

His eyes narrow, brows pulling together on his perfect face. “Your time is up.” It’s all he says, his voice suddenly sounding monotone yet commanding. You continue to shake your head, scooting away from him as your back hits the headboard, the blanket sliding off your body. “No.” 

“Y-You tricked…” You hiccup, feeling the sudden onslaught of tears throughout your entire body. “You never told me I would… That I…” — The man doesn’t say anything, his hand has dropped back to rest by his side, and for a moment you think he might turn back around to leave. But he doesn’t. 

“You willingly gave her your time.” He states as a matter-of-factly, his features remaining stoic as he regards your sobbing frame. You knew that he was right, that you had willingly brought this fate upon yourself, as naive and unknowing as you may have been. This was all your doing. And though you had gotten another couple of years with your mother, you could not bear the thought of parting from her again. 

The cold was worse now, worse than it had ever been before. It consumed you wholeheartedly. Even if he was to let you continue on like this, what life would you get? You were dead already. There was nothing left for you. Nothing but the inevitable grief you were to bring forth on your mother. 

With trembling hands you wipe your tear stained face. Your breath is jagged, like a broken record, playing the same part on repeat over and over. Through bleary eyes, you manage to find him in the darkness. The pale moonlight casts his face in an eerie glow, one that made him appear ethereal. It was then and there you realized that your time was indeed running out. This would be your last conscious moment. 

“Please..” Your voice is low, nothing but a mere whisper. Yet it garners his attention as his dark eyes flicker over to yours. “Can you grant me one more wish?” You don’t expect him to oblige, you don’t expect anything at all, in fact you would have been content with even a small twitch of his brow. But the man doesn’t say anything, instead he merely watches you, an almost expectant look striking his features. 

You inhale, holding that last dying breath for a second before letting go. “Can you… Can you kiss me?” Your words hang in the still air, flashing before your eyes in menacing quality. You had not thought the request through, not once. All you knew was that you wanted to feel something, anything, one last time. 

His expression remains unmoving, he looked almost statue-like as he stood by the edge of your bed. — Your hands had returned to the blanket, now by your knees, and your fingers twist uncomfortably in the fabric. The silence is so loud it rings in your ears, causing an almost screeching noise. 

But then, without as much as a word, he takes a step forward. The mattress dips under the weight of him as one of his knees sink into the soft cushion. His spotless face, now mere inches from yours make your eyes widen in surprise. — He doesn’t say anything, nor does he hesitate when he presses his lips against yours. 

He’s warm. 

For six years, two thousand one hundred and ninety days, you had been cold, terribly so. Nothing could bring you comfort, nothing could make the icy feeling go away. Nothing but him. The small touch of his skin against yours set your body aflame, and for the first time in so long, you felt alive again, even if only for a moment. 

His lips are unmoving against your own, warm and soft. You don’t dare open your eyes, instead you remain equally still, almost frozen in place. And when five seconds have passed you think he might pull away, demanding you come with him to wherever awaited, but he doesn’t. 

You kiss him, you kiss him in the way you would those you longed for, those you lusted after. But not those you loved, for you don’t think you had ever loved anyone like that. Without stopping to think, your cold hand reaches for his face, trembling as your palm comes to rest against his cheek. 

You want to hold on forever, never letting this moment go. He must feel your nails digging into his shoulder now, your hand on his face pulling him closer. But even then, he remains unfazed. For a second you think he might actually kiss you back, that he might reciprocate that feeling of life that you so longed for. He doesn’t. 

He pulls back only when your tongue swipes across his bottom lip, a guarded expression on his otherwise melancholy face. His cheeks are flushed and there’s a soft redness to his warm skin, one that you were certain hadn’t been there before. Though his soft breaths are hardly matching your near panting ones. 

Your hand falls from his face and you swallow. “I don’t want to die.” It didn’t matter if you were already dead, that was not the same as what you were about to face. An end to your time on earth, a cease in your existence. You want to think about your mother, you want to remember her face even in death, and you want to hear her voice even as the ground swallows you whole. 

But you can’t look away from him, from his beautiful and nearly expressionless face. You had never imagined the face of death to be beautiful, for it had always been described as a painful and sorrowful experience. It is permanent, with no way to ever go back. 

Tears spill down your wet cheeks, an ugly sob ripping from your thick throat. Your body trembles, but not from the cold. — “I’m scared…” The admission is a mere breath, one so silent only he could hear. 

He shakes his head, the movement slow and soft. “Don’t be.” Is all he says, and for some reason you find solace in his words. 

Then he presses his lips against yours, briefly startling you as your eyes widen. That same feeling of warmth embraces you once again, and you feel the ice around you slowly melting. He kisses you just like you had him a mere moment ago. Except his kiss holds love. A love that felt almost sacred, like you were undeserving of it. 

Your body feels numb, and you could feel yourself becoming almost drowsy. It doesn’t hurt, none of it does. In fact you can barely feel anything but his lips on yours. 

Death wasn’t painful, nor was it agonizing. It was beautiful. The man before you was the epitome of it, and you did not fear him. You did not fear what would come after, and you did not fear that nothing would come at all. 

Your soul died that night, but it died warm.

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[theloveoffootball10]

ғᴏᴏʟɪsʜ - ʟᴀɴᴅᴏ ɴᴏʀʀɪs

complete masterlist

ʟᴀɴᴅᴏ ɴᴏʀʀɪs x ᴏᴄ Something a little bit different from me tonight. A very old one shot reimagined as a Lando fic because I can’t help myself.

ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛʀᴇɴɢᴛʜ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ᴛᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ'ᴍ ᴡᴇᴀᴋ 'ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ

Five years ago when Lando Norris asked me to be his girlfriend, I was the happiest I've ever been we may have been young but we were in love. I never thought one person could make me feel like I was on cloud nine everyday the way he did. I had the life so many dream about; the most loving boyfriend, amazing friends, the nice house, the nice car, the luxury holidays. I had it all. It sounds perfect doesn't it? Don't get me wrong it's an amazing lifestyle until the person you love more than anything in the world cheats on you. Not just once but regularly. That's when none of that stuff matters anymore it becomes a world of anxiety, doubt and worry. Where is he? Who is he with? Will he come home tonight? This is the life I'm living now as Lando Norris's fiancée. 

"Where've you been?" I ask Lando casually as he strolls into the bedroom of our Monaco apartment. Deep down I know where he's been and truthfully it makes me feel sick but I don't actually want to hear the words come from his mouth. In my head it will be more devastating to actually hear him say what I know has been going on behind my back for months now rather than acting oblivious.

"Just out with some friends, you should come next time" Lando says as he starts getting ready for bed. I don't understand how he's so blasé and how he can act like he's doing nothing wrong.

"That would be interesting wouldn't it" I mumble to myself as I turn the TV off and pull the duvet over myself, cocooning myself in.

"What was that?" Lando asks as he stands in the doorway of our en-suite.

"I said maybe one day. Night Lando" I say turning my bedside lamp off to put an end to our conversation. Hearing the bathroom door close I finally let the tears roll down my cheeks. This seems to have became a more regular thing lately. Lando comes home late with no explanation and I cry myself to sleep. Thinking about our relationship I question how things have got this bad between us. How have we allowed things to get this bad?

"You cried yourself to sleep again last night didn't you?" My best friend Sarah says the next day as I sit in her kitchen.

"What makes you say that?" I don't even know why I'm trying to deny it. It's obvious when you look at me and sadly she's been through this with me so many times she knows the signs.

"Your eyes are red and puffy. The bags under your eyes are something else and your mood tells me that you're beating yourself up. Why do you let him do this to you Taylor?" Sarah says not even needing to ask what's going on.

"I love him Sarah. I haven't actually asked him about anything yet but it's the same signs as the last four times" saying things out loud makes me realise what I'm actually letting Lando do to me.

"Taylor get some self respect! This might sound harsh but I can't watch Lando hurt you any more. He's cheated on you multiple times! You know about four girls he's admitted to but let’s be honest there's probably a hell of a lot more and every time you keep running back to him. You throw him out for a few weeks maybe two months at the most and he begs enough and promises to never do it again and you take him back because you miss having him around! No one deserves to be treated the way he's treating you" listening to Sarah I know she's right but I can't physically admit that my relationship with Lando has ran its course. It's destroying me mentally. 

"It's not all bad though and I know he does love me" I'm aware I sound pathetic but I truthfully believe that Lando does still love me. We’ve been together for so long now, he’s the only one I think about when I think about forever.

"This isn't how you treat someone you love. Look I'm not going to say anymore because you know I have a strong opinion on this and we don't agree so rather than this ending in an argument I'm going to stop talking. I've told you what I think but sadly I can't make any decisions for you. If I could he'd have been binned off a long time ago" I know everyone who knows me would be happy if I left Lando for good but I can't, I don't want to be alone. I can't picture a life without him in it. I feel like I've put so much time and effort into our relationship to throw it away.

sᴏ ɪ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ʟᴇᴀʀɴ ᴛᴏ ᴀᴘᴘʀᴇᴄɪᴀᴛᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴇɴ ɪᴛ ᴀʟʟ ʀᴇᴍᴀɪɴs ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɪɴ'ᴛ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇ

"Will you come in with me? I know exactly what I'll be going in there to and I'm not prepared for that" I say as we pull into the garage at mine and Lando’s apartment and I see the strange car in one of our parking bays.

"Taylor this is so wrong. We've been away for a hen weekend and now you're worried to even go in your own house because you know your dick of a boyfriend has most likely cheated on you, again. However I can see how anxious you are so I will come with you but I'm telling you now I'm not being held responsible for my actions if he has got a girl in there" getting out of the car with Sarah I'm terrified. I know Lando has cheated on me probably too many times to count but I've never actually caught him with another girl let alone with another girl in our home.

"Lando?" I say walking into the kitchen not seeing Lando anywhere. This just confirms to me that he's still in our bed with a slut. Yes I'm going to call her a slut even though I don't know her. Mine and Lando’s relationship has been in the public eye for as long as I remember and there's photos around the house of us together. There's no way she can't know about me. Walking into our bedroom I feel sick. Lando is still sleeping with the fake red headed slut next to him and I feel like I can't breathe.

"You don't deserve this Taylor. What are you going to do?"

"I don't know anymore Sarah. I could always block it out when I didn't see anything but how will I get this image out of my head? She's in my bed" I say. I'm angry and I'm shaking but I don't know how to act.

"Not for much longer she won't be" Sarah says walking over to the bedside table where she grabs the bottle of water that is sat there. Before I know it she's pouring water over Lando and whoever that is in my bed "get up now, both of you" I don't think I've ever heard Sarah so angry in the whole time I've known her.

"What the fuck are you doing? You absolute psycho!" Lando shouts as he jumps out of bed.

"How could you?" I say when Lando looks at me actually realising I'm there and not just Sarah. I'm scarily calm and I'm even scaring myself. I don't even shout, I haven't got it in me to raise my voice.

"Taylor babe this meant nothing" always the same speech. It never meant anything when Lando tries to justify his actions.

"Don't you think you better leave?" I say looking at the girl in my bed "I don't care who the fuck you are but get the fuck out of my bed and get the fuck out of my house. Now!" Seeing the look on Sarah’s face I know she never expected that tone to come from me, hell I didn't even expect it.

I don't take my eyes of the red head as she climbs out of bed gathering her clothes, within minutes I hear her leave the house. That's when I let the tears flow free and Lando gets the brunt of my anger. Next thing I know I'm throwing things at him, I'm hitting his chest and I can't stop the tears.

"Why would you do this to me!"

"I'm sorry! It was a mistake. She didn't mean anything to me. Taylor she's nothing compared to you" Lando says trying to pull me into his arms but I resit and pull back.

"Don't touch me!" I scream at Lando not wanting to be anywhere near him.

"You disgust me Norris! You've got the most amazing girl and you treat her like this! You don't deserve her! She should've left you the first time she found out you cheated" Sarah shouts at Lando and I know she’s right. I should have left years ago.

"Keep out of this Sarah! This is between me and Taylor! Why are you even here?"

"Because your fiancée was too scared to come into her own home by herself because she knew you'd have a slut here! Look what you're doing to her! You're destroying her piece by piece!" Sarah has so much built up anger towards Lando I can see this exploding as both of them raise their voices at each other.

"Stop it! Stop it now! Both of you!" I scream nearly hysterical looking between my fiancée and best friend "I know you don't like each other but stop! Sarah will you give us a minute please?" I say knowing I need to speak to Lando alone.

"I'll be in the kitchen" Sarah says giving Lando daggers as she leaves the bedroom.

"Tay..." Lando starts but I cut him off.

"Don't bother Lando. I don't want to hear it. From my perspective you have no excuse for any of this. We were supposed to get married! Christ it's not like you don't get sex from me because you do! I could understand a little bit more if that was the case! I want you to leave" I say determined this will be the last time.

"Taylor please don't. I love you"

"This isn't how you treat someone you love Lando. Just go please. Stay with a friend, stay with your family, stay with one of the sluts you've been shagging behind my back I don't care anymore. All I know is that I want you to pack a bag and leave. There never will be a wedding" I say throwing my engagement ring on the bed before walking out of the bedroom not giving Lando the chance to respond. This is the final straw I can't go through this anymore. After five years I need to plan a life without Lando Norris by my side.

[clj-art-blog]

DFQC and XLH | "Sweet Candy" for Dongfang Qingcang

[shrimpybbq]

rafe, his fiancée and their family in the 18 month gap between s3 and s4

“What do you think about another baby?”

rafe is ecstatic about the prospect of another kid, and he shows it. he’s constantly spoiling his girl, always doting on her and helping her around the house. he makes sure to hire staff around tannyhill and ensure she doesn’t have to stress, making sure to spend time each night with his family despite the chaos of his day. rafe knows her first pregnancy wasn’t the best (bc of him) and he wants to give her a whole new experience

high school gf was worried about telling him she was pregnant again, knowing how badly it all went the first time. she knew rafe had grown to love his son and his family, but she was still apprehensive about his reaction, knowing he was in a stressful period of life rn. she didn’t have anything to worry about however, seeing straight away how different rafe was with her now. he loved being a father and was so keen to have another baby, especially now everything is his, and he can provide for his family the way he wants

baby no. 2 was a girl, just as rafe wanted. he already has little charlie, who is a carbon copy of himself, but he wants a little girl who looks just like her mother. rafe already loved to stare at his fiancée’s face, but imagining her looking after a mini version of herself - rafe thinks he might die.

as his fiancée and mother of his child, high school gf is living good. rafe is struggling with his father’s death, but mostly, they’re happy - really, really happy. charlie is starting to speak, and he is so excited to have a baby sister

oh you know the jokes are going around the OBX about how rafe just can’t keep it in his pants (but who could blame him when his girl is just so hot)

rafe doing the absolute most to have his fiancée relaxed and resting at all times - he loves to take her out on the boat and let her lay in the warm sun, especially because she gets so clingy when she’s sleepy and calm

rafe who begins to secretly hunt for a new house for the family to move into, wanting a new space just for themselves. tannyhill had too many bad vibes and rafe wants to start fresh

the family are often seen out and about the island with little charlie either toddling in front of his parents, or being swung in between their outstretched arms

charlie becoming known by those on the island as a cheeky little boy, always pulling faces and trying to play with everyone

rafe watching his girl get closer and closer to her due date and growing more and more anxious - he was so coked up the first time that he never really worried, but now he is always hovering and checking in on their baby

rafe is there for this delivery!! he's 100% holding his fiancée’s hand and brushing her sweaty hair out of her face, whispering "you can do this, baby, you've got this"

the nurses let him cut the cord once his daughter is born and he is definitely crying and trying to subtly wipe away his tears

the whole family spending the next few weeks hiding in their new house enjoying their first moments with their new little girl

rafe picks her name and decides to call her emmeline, emmy for short

if any family ever gave off rich vibes, it's the cameron's. rafe has his kids dressed to the nines, nice cars in the driveway of his new house and his fiancée wearing the nicest jewellery

all the women on kildare being so jealous once they see sexy muscular rafe cameron fussing over a tiny little baby, emmy clutched tightly in his arms as his fiancée holds charlie's hand

rafe would never admit it, but he loves the looks he gets when he walks around his little girl - he might be loyal but he still likes to be reminded he's hot sorry not sorry

wedding time!!!!

i think their wedding is actually very casual, maybe even a holiday elopement

rafe doesn't really like the people in the obx that much and so when his girl suggested getting married somewhere quiet, just the two of them, he was like "mmm, why not?"

the pair get married on a private beach in hawaii, rafe in a loose white shirt and a pair of linen trousers, his girl in a silky dress (this is so serious to me)

they hire a photographer and definitely put a big wedding pic on their hallway wall

everyone in the obx knew it was coming (bc they were engaged) but people are still a little shocked that the high school couple actually got married?

i see them settling into a nice routine once back, really just wifey looking after their little family, rafe running cameron development and the family spending all their time together happily

idk i'm just very passionate about the concept of rafe being loved and giving love in return bc it's clear he's capable of it, he just needs to feel safe and nurtured

click here for pre-season 1 rafe, gf & their unborn son

click here for season 1 rafe, gf & their son

click here for season 2 rafe, gf & their son

click here for season 3 rafe, gf & their son

click here for season 4 part 1 rafe, gf & their son

[luveline]

oooh what about hotch's sister calling spencer to pick her up at the hospital after an accident or something because she doesn't want hotch to know since worry and go into protective big brother mode, but spencer tells him anyway and they both show up and lots of fluff ensues :)

adopted fem!reader, 1.5k

cw for panic attacks

You should call your brother. 

You think about it, even pull up his contact, he’s the first person you go to when you need help and he always has been, but lately Aaron has been so stressed you hesitate, clicking the text button by mistake. 

You read back his last message. 

I can feel myself being spread too thin but there’s nothing I can do to fix it, he’d text. I guess I’m frustrated. But how are you, working girl? New jobs are scary. I bet you’re doing better than you think already. Jack and I are super proud of you

You’d sent him a meagre response. You aren’t always sure what to say to him. Sincerity is easier in person, but even then, he can be terse and deflective; he looks after you and no one looks after him. 

You didn’t tell him about work, and you won’t tell him about now. You call Spencer instead. This is a good way to test the almost dating thing, right? 

He doesn’t answer. When you call again, he answers on the first ring. “Hey, are you okay?” 

“No. Are you busy?” 

“I’m not busy if you’re not okay. Two seconds.” There’s a pause where you assume he’s moving from one place to another, perhaps closing a book around his hand, or closing the lid on an early lunch. “What’s wrong?” 

“I’m, uh, in hospital. I had a huge panic attack at work and I… thought I was having a heart attack, so I–” You’re so embarrassed your voice turns to a thread. “Sorry, I know it’s so stupid.” 

“It’s not stupid, that’s not stupid. How do you feel now?” 

“Like someone hit me really hard in the chest.” 

“Are you calmed down?” 

“Mostly.” You wince. “They want to talk to me about medications. Uh.” You clear your throat. “I want to go home.” 

“Angel… I’m on my way, okay? I’ll get Hotch and–”

“You can’t tell him.” 

“What?” 

“Please, Spencer, he gets so worried, he’s worried enough. And if he finds out I had a panic attack he’ll try and make me take time off of work and that’s just another thing on his plate he didn’t ask for–”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he says softly, “please don’t panic. You’ve had a hard morning, panicking again is really gonna hurt. Try and think about things that don’t wind you up, alright? Is there anything you need me to get?” 

“You don’t have to come.” 

“That’s why you called me, right? I’ll be there.” 

You can’t know that he says goodbye and ducks straight back into Hotch’s office, where he’d been, to tell on you. It’s not to hurt you and it isn’t because you told him not to —it’s two parts concern, and one part self preservation. Aaron needs to know and you need him with you, and he also can’t imagine things going well for himself if he kept the news of your stay a secret. The shovel talk plays in his mind. 

Aaron’s shovel talk being, You won’t do anything to hurt her, said simply, and with an impassive expression that bordered terrifying. Not overly unaffected, just casual. 

You’re laying in your hospital bed with your hands clasped across your stomach when Spencer arrives. He frowns at you in your bed, worse when he sees your smudged makeup and the chafed inside of your wrist where you’ve picked and squeezed at your own skin. Your panic has left a physical mark, your chest aching as you force yourself to sit, and it hurts doubly so when your brother lets himself in behind your nearly-boyfriend.

You don’t have it in you to complain. 

“I’m sorry,” Spencer says, reaching down to give you a quick hug as you sit. “I had to tell him.” 

 Aaron’s hug is similarly apologetic, though much longer. “You weren’t gonna tell me?” he asks quietly, his hand settling at the place between your shoulders. “How do you feel now?” 

“I’m fine, I– I really thought I was having a heart attack.” 

“That’s common,” Spencer says, “it’s the feeling of impending doom, thousands of people mistake anxiety for medical issues every week.” 

Aaron holds you by the shoulders. “It’s okay,” he says. “Was it a doctor that checked you out, or a nurse?” 

Aaron probes the name of your nurse from you and promises to be back soon. He seems to have gleaned that the quickest way to get information today won’t be from you. 

Spencer goes in for another hug when he leaves, and then, to your delight, a very quick kiss pressed to your cheek. He ducks away after that and sits on the side of your hospital bed, his knuckles gracing the outside of your thigh. “Thank you for calling me,” he says, smiling at you, and better when you smile back.

“Thanks for coming.” 

“Of course. I know how it feels, okay? If they want to talk about medication it’s a good thing, but everyone has moments like this.” 

“I can’t believe you told Aaron,” you say, giving a weak but playful glare.

“I can’t believe you weren’t going to. He loves you, he wants to know what’s hurting you, no matter how much stuff is on his plate.” 

You bite the inside of your lip, contemplative for a few slow seconds. “You think so?” you ask finally. 

The hair flicked under his ears wobbles as he nods. “Absolutely.” 

You lean forward to readjust his collar and tie. He’s wearing one of his cutesy waistcoats, dark grey over a light blue shirt. His tie has patterns you trace with your thumb, like fish scales. “Sorry, I know you were working,” you murmur. 

“I think my boss will forgive me.” 

You let your hands fall. Spencer, perhaps picking up on a hint you hadn’t meant to give, takes them both into one of his and squeezes reassuringly. 

“It’s harder than I thought,” you confide softly. 

“It’s an adjustment period. But maybe it’s not right for you, there. That’s what started it, right? Your job.” 

“I’m not sure. I don’t know. I get panicky about all sorts of stuff, but I’ve never had one this bad before. I was a miserable kid, you can ask Aaron, but I really thought I was better.” 

He rubs over your fingers with his thumb. “I think we all have stuff that messes us up. Doesn’t mean you’re not better. You don’t even really have to be better. And I… I am here for you, I promise. I know you have no reason to trust me with it yet, but I’ll listen whenever you need me to.” 

You think about kissing him. Spencer kisses like he’s suffocating and your air, it’s cliche and undeniably true. Whenever you kiss him it’s like a shock —he steals your breath, he can’t stop himself from grabbing your face, and any other time you’d love it, but right now you just need a peck. You’re hoping he can do those kinds of kisses too. 

“Will you kiss me?” you ask tentatively.

He gets the memo on gentleness. You shouldn’t be surprised, your very first kiss was tame, his hand running up your arm as he encourages you forward. Your eyes shutter closed at the feeling of his lips on yours, and the exhausting thrumming that’s lived beneath your skin since you woke up numbs to a more manageable ache. 

Spencer breaks away. He cups your cheek quickly, dropping it immediately when the door opens. 

You shuffle backward nonchalantly. 

Aaron gives you a sarcastic look. Really? it says. I wasn't born yesterday. 

“They want to give you a prescription for Paxil, honey, what do you think?” He turns his attention to Spencer reluctantly. “What’s her best option here?” 

“Paxil could be fine. They didn’t suggest a benzodiazepine? Paxil is an SSRIs, it slows down the rate of serotonin reuptake, basically increasing the effectiveness of your bodies natural serotonin, which could decrease the risk of another attack, but taking it won’t stop her from feeling like this,” —he frowns at your location— “very quickly. Ideally she should have a medication for general anxiety and the option for quicker relief if this happens again.” He smiles at you suddenly, nearly shyly. “If that’s what you want, that is.” 

“What are you thinking, honey?” Aaron asks you. 

You have the two of them here to look after you while you decide. You take Spencer’s hand gently, desperate for reassurance. “I’m not sure.” 

“It’s okay, we’ll work it out,” your brother promises. 

Spencer squeezes your hand. 

[rose-pearls]

The perils of love

Summary: being in love with Luke seemed to be a bad idea as you realise that he doesn't seem to be interested. But as you get ready to move on from love entirely your father decides to appear and two people fall for you.

Main Taglist : @avada-kedavra-bitch-187, @nyx2021, @thestarspangledcaptain, @kmc1989 (open)

Part 2

Luke Castellan, everyone knew him at camp either for his sword skills or just his kind smiles for every camper that walked into the Hermes cabin. You had fallen for him the moment you met him, sweet brown eyes and a kind smile had you into a puddle. 

You had been twelve, wandering around the Hermes cabin, waiting desperately for your parent to claim you but the days went by, and you still were there. The little girls crush however didn’t went by but grew stronger every day you saw the boy who slowly turned into a man that had all the girls going crazy over him.  

He had been kind to you but there was always a look that you couldn’t decipher, until today that was.

“So, where is your number one fan Luke?”, you hear Chris say in a teasing tone and after a moment you hear Chris say your name, as if to make it clear it was you. 

“I don’t know and frankly I don’t have the time to care right now,” Luke says after letting out a sigh, but you felt your chest tighten at the words. Chris snorts at the words and you don’t expect what he says next.

“You know that there is a betting pool as to when the both of you are going to date,” you don’t know how Luke reacts, as you are practically one with the wall, but you hear him snort.

“Please, she is a sweet girl, but I would never date her. I don’t know how to explain it but sometimes she can just be a little-”, he seems to be trying to find his words and as you wait for it you feel tears brimming in your eyes at his previous statement.

“Clingy? I mean she is practically everywhere you are.”, the words are like a bullet to your heart, particularly when you hear Luke agree.

“I know right, I mean I know that she is still part of the Hermes cabin as she hasn’t been claimed yet but still,” you try to blink the tears away, not willing to cry as you hear the words being said by the man you had always looked up to. 

“Maybe she will never be claimed, I mean after three years,” Chris says, and you can hear the grimace in his voice, he says it with such carelessness as if you haven’t been thinking about the same thing every night for the past three years, wondering what was wrong with you.

“We’ll see what happens I guess, but maybe it would be good for her to be in another cabin,” Luke says, he looks like he doesn’t want to talk about it anymore, but Chris adds one last phrase to their conversation.

“Or better for you,” there is a quiet hum of agreement and that is the only thing you need before leaving the cabin quietly, the book that you had come for quickly forgotten.

You knew it was pitiful, the fact that they all seemed to know that you liked the Hermes boy and that they all pitied you for it. Because in the end the boy would never go for you, he had a hundred girls waiting for him and yet here you were hoping for the impossible.

Tears are brimming in your eyes, but you quickly brush them away, not wanting to cry after what had happened, you needed to be strong now. It was time for you to get over that stupid crush and get on with your life, maybe if you trained more your godly parent would finally recognize you and claim you.

“What are you doing here all alone?”, you suddenly hear someone say behind you and you turn around to find Annabeth looking at you with worried eyes.

“Thinking, the lake always seems to sooth me,” you say, the words coming a bit weaker than you intended them too. The girl simply nods at your words before sitting down next to you.

“What about you?”, you quietly ask her, and she lets out a sigh.

“Needed to get out a little bit, I can only strategise so much before going crazy,” she says with a small smile, and you can’t help but smile at her words.

“I’m sure your strategy will be incredible, as always,” you tell her and she simply nods, looking too far into her thoughts.

“Chiron is thinking of splitting up the Hermes cabin,” she suddenly says, and you turn to look at her in surprise.

“Really? How so?”, you can’t help but ask, wondering if this is maybe your chance to get a bit away from a certain Hermes boy.

“He thinks that the unclaimed children and children of minor gods should get the chance to chose in which team they want to be,” she looks conflicted, and you can understand why, this could mean less people for the blue team, her team.

“It seems like a kind gesture,” you can’t help but say and Annabeth nods in agreement.

“It is, although he could’ve said it sooner, now we all need to find a different strategy and we are going crazy with figuring out who will be on our team,” she seems overwhelmed, and you can’t help but put your hand on her shoulder trying to calm her down.

“Hey, calm down it will all be alright,” you tell her, and she takes a deep breath before slowly nodding in agreement.

“I know, I just don’t want to lose,” she says with a pout, and you can finally see the twelve-year-old she really is, that childlike excitement at the thought of capture the flag.

The both of you are deep in thought before her voice breaks the silence, her voice small as she talks.

“Which team are you choosing?”, it was probably a valid question to ask, you were unclaimed so you could technically choose which team to be on, but you just couldn’t get the previous conversation you had heard out of your head.

“The fact that you aren’t saying anything makes me think that you are going to go on the red team,” it seems like she is trying to tease you but there is some sort of hurt woven into her words.

“Don’t take it personally,” you can’t help but say, as much as you would’ve liked staying on the blue team you just couldn’t bear to be that close to Luke after what you had heard. You didn’t know what you would be doing tonight as you were sleeping in the same cabin as always, but he wouldn’t pay attention to you not unless you went to him.

“Did something happened with Luke?”, the carefully asked question makes you look at Annabeth with wide eyes, she had an understanding look in her eyes and you couldn’t help but curse the fact that she was Athena’s daughter.

“Nothing happened, I just realised that maybe I should get to know other people and that maybe it would get me out of my comfort zone,” there are a lot of things unsaid, Annabeth knows it too. Luckily, she doesn’t know of the conversation you had heard, or the fact that the words had cut you deeper than you could’ve ever thought they would. 

“You should probably tell Chiron and the red team, I heard that they were planning a strategy evening to talk about what they were going to do tomorrow,” you try to find anger in Annabeth’s eyes but there is only understanding and a lingering sadness that seems to disappear as you get up.

“Good idea, I will be doing that right now. Good luck on the strategy and don’t drive yourself crazy Annabeth you will do great,” you tell her, and a sweet smile appears on her lips as she nods slowly making you smile at her.

“Don’t be a stranger!”, she yells as you are about to leave, and you turn around to smile at her.

“I won’t!”, she looks reassured at the words before turning back to the water, leaving you to go towards Chiron office. 

--

“A little birdie told me you were on the red team,” you hear someone say and turn around to find Clarisse smirking at you.

“Would that little birdie be Chiron?”, you ask, feeling breathless after trying to stab the dummy about a hundredth time with your sword.

“I don’t reveal my sources princess,” she says with a smirk while you feel your cheeks heat up, you tell yourself it’s because of the work out you just did.

“We have a meeting tonight, after dinner at the Ares cabin,” she says while looking around the rink before picking up a sword.

“I’ll be there,” you tell her, expecting the girl to leave you alone but she just comes closer to you.

“After that there is a movie night and a sleepover, one of the Aphrodite kids managed to convince Chiron to allow it,” the words leave you confused for a moment, how would you even have a movie night with all these people.

“Only a few people are invited for that part,” she clarifies, and you feel breathless at the sight of her warm brown eyes, seemingly forgetting about other brown eyes.

“How come I am invited?”, you can’t help but ask, wondering why the Ares girl suddenly seemed sweet to you when she was practically attacking anyone else. 

“Don’t ask too many questions or you’ll be uninvited princess,” the nickname rolls of her tongue in a way that makes your cheeks go red, once again.

“Fine I’ll stop asking questions and just come with my pajama’s,” you tell her, and a satisfied grin makes his way on her lips.

“Good, now back to serious stuff you were holding your sword the wrong way,” she says like it’s a fact, as if she was pointing out that the sky was blue.

“No, I wasn’t!”, you can’t help but say looking at her with wide eyes.

“Yes, it is, let me help you fix it. I need the best people on my team after all,” you get ready to object but as you feel her get behind you putting her hand over yours on the sword to put your hand correctly you find yourself speechless.

The next hour is spent fighting against each other, but you can’t stop laughing as Clarisse tells you stories of her siblings to try and distract you, which ultimately works as you often end up on your ass. You don’t even seem to notice another pair of brown eyes looking at you, farther away, brows furrowed as he looks at the scene in front of him.

--

“Welcome to the exclusive sleepover,” you hear a soft voice say and you turn around to find Silena smiling kindly at you, two glasses in her hands before giving one to you.

“Thank you, guess they really were exclusive as I had never heard of them before,” you say, feeling a bit nervous as you look around the room only to find Clarisse in a heated discussion with another Aphrodite girl.

“Clarisse only invites people that she trusts or likes, which isn’t many, but she does cares for them,” Silena smiles at the Ares girl in front of you and you can’t help but do the same, Clarisse always seemed to be angry but in that moment, she seemed far more softer.

“I’m glad she trusts me,” you say, somehow missing the look Silena gives you, a look of confusion as you seem to have missed her clue on Clarisse liking you.

Clarisse had always been discrete about it, but Silena had caught her looking at you far too often to not know about it. Her fingers always seemed to itch when you were sword fighting, as if she was itching to get your posture right and to be able to touch you even for just a few seconds. You only had eyes for the Castellan boy, or it seemed that way until yesterday when Chiron told them that you would be on their team. Silena didn’t ask much of her mother but in that moment, she couldn’t help but ask her mother for help to get the both of you together. Clarisse deserved her happy ending and you deserved someone who would love you for who you were.

She gets woken from her thoughts as she hears Clarisse talking to you, there is a nervousness in her gestures as she pushes her hair behind her ear, but you don’t seem to realize it as you recount a story. Silena quietly gets up from her spot, and sends and encouraging look towards Clarisse, who seems a bit more at ease now. 

--

Capture the flag is a mess, more than the last time but you try not to let your mind wander too long. A boy that you think is from the Hephaestus cabin runs towards you and you sigh in annoyance before starting to fight against him, quickly ‘killing’ him and making him surrender. 

You had been tasked with trying to find the blue flag, but it seemed as if Annabeth had found a really good spot this time, and she had put more people in defense. After a while you wondered if you had the wrong hunch until you saw something blue flickering in the reflection of your sword. As you turned to look behind you, you saw the blue flag but weirdly there was no one around it.

“This feels like a trap,” you can’t help but whisper under your breath as you try to hide behind the bushes but a blade against your neck makes you stop in your steps.

“Sorry, but I need to do this,” you hear someone say and you turn around to find a sheepish Percy looking at you.

“Hi Percy,” you say with a kind smile and the boy smiles back, looking reassured that you aren’t mad or swinging your sword at him.

“How are you doing?”, you can’t help but ask, you hadn’t seen him since he had been claimed by Poseidon, but the boy seemed healthy.

“Good, well as good as you can when you learn that your father is one of the big three’s and that your life will be a hellhole,” he says with a roll of his eyes, and you can’t help but snort.

“Still as sarcastic I see,” you can’t help but say while laughing and a sheepish grin forms itself on his lips.

“Can’t help it,” he says while shrugging his shoulders.

“It’s a shame you aren’t on our team,” he says quietly, and you smile softly, the two of you had talked a lot when he had arrived, and you felt close to him.

“Maybe next time,” you tell him and the boy smiles at the answer before asking you a question and the two of you talk for a moment before you hear a battle cry and see the red team suddenly making their way in the clearing, the blue team also appearing.

Percy and you look at each other with wide eyes before you take out your sword.

“If you don’t say anything about this, I won’t say anything,” Percy nods quickly and the both of you break away from the tree you were behind before joining your team as Percy joins his.

An Apollo girl comes running towards you, but you quickly manage to disarm her, others following behind her, but you are in such a haze that you don’t realize how close you are getting to the flag. That is until you are met with a familiar blade, Luke’s. 

The boy is looking at you, slightly out of breath from the fighting just like you.

“You can always abandon now sweetheart,” he says and can’t help but blush slightly at the familiar nickname. 

“No chance Castellan, give me your worst,” this seems to make the boy laugh before he quickly wields his swords, yours clashing against his in familiar movements. You had fought many times against Luke as he had taught you how to fight but you had a new trick up your sleeve that Clarisse had taught you. She had told you that his left leg was his weakness, a bruise that had never really fully recovered. 

So, when the opportunity presents itself, you wield your sword against his left leg, making sure not to hurt him too much. But as you hit the spot Luke winces in pain and his sword leaves his hand. You don’t think at that point and simply continue straight to the flag, whispering a soft ‘sorry’ as you go to the Hermes boy.

You manage to take the flag before seeing Percy coming towards you with his sword, you expect the hit, but he seems transfixed, looking at something above you. There is a loud silence, on a battlefield that was filled with battle cries just a second ago.

Chiron’s voice suddenly comes up, suddenly saying your name.

“Daughter of Zeus, king of the gods,” the rest of his words are lost as you look up, only to see the symbol of Zeus above your head, your father’s symbol.

You didn’t know how to feel, you had been waiting for so long but now that it was happening you just felt lost. Why was he claiming you right now?

“Congratulations! Seems like we are cousins now,” you suddenly hear Percy say, he has a bright smile on his lips, but there is also sadness in his eyes. It takes you a few seconds to understand why, you were now a child of the big three, which meant your life was about to be a hellhole as Percy had said.

“Always though there was something familiar between the two of us,” you try to say in a teasing tone, but it falls flat, Percy nodding in understanding.

As you turn around to look at the rest of the camp you see Luke looking at you with wide brown eyes, as if he was seeing you for the first time. You turn your gaze towards Clarisse who is looking at you with a proud smile and something else that you can’t quite understand.

There was surely a lot of trouble coming but not the one you were expecting, it would be far more complicated than monsters or a father that decided to appear after fifteen years. Matters of the heart were after all the most complicated of all, particularly between a daughter of Zeus, a daughter of Ares and a son of Hermes. 

[yueebby]

sooo i read your "indulge me?" piece and that's why i wanted to ask for gojo simping for reader that doesn't really seem him as more as a friend and he's fine with it (lol he's not but he's need to keep the facade you know???) hope you write it at some point! btw loving you writing so far <333

11:34pm — gojo satoru

contents. highschool!gojo, fluff, he’s so in love bye, underage drinking, tokyo and kyoto students have a little get together!

“what’s wrong with him?” utahime watches her white haired underclassman down another can of beer. it was rare to see gojo drinking with the rest of the group, always opting for a soda instead.

shoko takes another swig out of her drink, unsurprised. “[name] is on a date.” 

a pathetic groan leaves gojo’s lips and the upper half of his body is splayed over the kotatsu in shoko’s room, sunglasses long forgotten somewhere. he lets out an unapologetic burp. everyone at the table spares him a glance of pity. 

utahime grimaces and mutters a quiet, “gross”. 

“don’t provoke him,” geto scolds shoko, flicking some ash from his cigarette to the ashtray below. “she’s just dealing with clan matters. arranged marriages and whatnot.” he used his free hand to land a firm pat on gojo’s back. what kind of best friend would he be if he didn’t try to comfort satoru? 

“poor thing. i can keep you company in the meantime,” mei mei’s smile is far from something with good intentions. gojo shakes his head to refuse, but with the way his forehead was pressed to the table, it looked comical. like a child throwing a tantrum. 

the only thing that managed to get gojo satoru out of his drunken slump was a soft knock on the door. he could recognize that pattern anywhere. could it be–? the snow haired boy immediately perks up. his drunk dazed eyes brighten as he quickly makes his way to the door. 

geto snorts at the way his best friend reacts. he thinks he can see an imaginary tail wagging, as if he were a dog. 

“you’re late!” gojo accuses you when he opens the door. you blink.

“are you…okay?” your voice is laced with concern as gojo’s large frame towers over you. gojo preens.

“awww, is my [name] worried about me now? don’t worry, ‘m doing just fine!” there is a goofy grin painted on gojo’s face as he leans against the doorway. all conversation has stopped and every sorcerer was listening attentively to gojo's hopeless conversation with you. utahime can’t help but feel just a little compassion for the boy. he was pining so much it hurt.

“i wasn’t worried. it's just that your words are all slurred– don’t tell me you let shoko talk you into drinking with her again?” you sigh. it was hard to miss the smell of beer on him. gojo and alcohol never mixed well, and the last thing you needed tonight was another lecture from yaga. 

from inside her room, shoko shouts, “it wasn’t me this time! the idiot decided to drown himself in beer after we warned him not to!” it was common knowledge that gojo couldn’t handle his alcohol. 

the male in question pouts.

“can a man not grieve about the love of his life being married to another?” gojo deflates. on the other side of the threshold, you wrinkle your nose.

“who said anything about marriage? like hell i’m going to accept a proposal from naoya zen’in.” you grumble. it had been a long night. dealing with your family and naoya was enough to scare you into staying in jujutsu tech for good. you’d rather lose your sanity to gojo than your dignity to naoya. 

“never mind that though, are mei mei and utahime still here? i was hoping to catch up with them!” you smile, crouching under his arm to make your way into the room. gojo doesn’t hesitate to trail right behind you. 

“[name]!” utahime waves happily at you, her mood no longer sour after she sees you. your wave back is enthusiastic. mei mei acknowledges your presence.

“how was dinner with naoya?” suguru asks. your face pinches up. he laughs before handing you a cold can of soda which you accept graciously.

you hear gojo mutter to himself from behind you.

“what’s up with him?” you whisper to suguru.

“you know how he is when he drinks,” he sighs, ushering you to sit beside him. gojo seemed to have his own agenda though, forcefully squeezing himself between the two of you. you shoot him an annoyed look to which he responds with a grin on his face. 

“‘m tired,” he whines, stretching his arms dramatically while letting out a loud yawn. you grunt when there’s a heavy weight on you; gojo has thrown his entire body on your side.

you don’t bother pushing him off. you’ve learned in the two years you’ve known gojo that he is like a baby when he gets drunk. it’s best if you let him have his way.

“go to sleep then, idiot,” you flick his forehead. he juts his bottom lip childishly, looking up at you with wide eyes. his eyes are captivating and you think you see nervousness through those azure orbs.

“will you come to bed with me too?” he rests his chin on your shoulder. you raise an eyebrow in surprise.

“eh? why would i?”

“because i’m cute.” gojo bats those long eyelashes of his innocently. you roll your eyes playfully before taking another sip out of your soda. 

“you’re weird– that’s what you are.” your lips quirk upward, eyes twinkling with mirth. he sulks, chin still comfortably supported by your shoulder.

“‘m not that bad!” he protests, a frown forming on his lips. you look at him for a long moment. this was the first time you’ve ever gotten to look at gojo this closely. 

his hair was getting longer, you note silently. with your free hand, you slowly move a strand of hair out of his face. gojo watches you earnestly. if his cheeks were not already flushed, they are now. 

“can we stop it with the flirting? let us single folk live in peace.” shoko speaks up. you turn your attention hastily from gojo to the rest of your fellow peers. 

“i feel like i’m intruding on something,” mei mei says scandalously. your eyes widen.

“we are not– no way!” you shake your head repeatedly. no one believes you. especially not while gojo is still resting on your shoulder, eyes watching you, full of love.

“stop giving him all your attention and talk to us! we’re much better company,” utahime scowls, pointing her beer disapprovingly at the white haired boy on you. you think you hear gojo grunt.

“alright, alright,” you concede. 

“i hope you don’t mind me asking again, but do tell us how your night with the zen’in kid went,” suguru snickers. you groan exasperatedly.

“where do i even start?”

the rest of the night goes by pleasantly. you had been so engrossed with retelling your experience with dealing with your family that you had failed to notice what gojo was up to. by the time everyone left their respective dorms (or temporary dorms), you noticed the head of white hair sleeping soundly on your lap.

he mumbles something in his sleep, nuzzling himself closer into your stomach. cute. you giggle at how innocent he looks. 

you don’t know what took over you, but you remember bending down and placing a soft kiss on his forehead. to your surprise, gojo reciprocates your kiss. to the best of his capabilities anyway. you watch as he puckers his lips in his sleep. oh my– how precious.

you suppose he isn't so bad.

notes. THANK U FOR BEING MY FIRST ANON ASK. ily!!! i saw somewhere that gege confirmed gojo would have drunken failures when he was a student haha this is my take on that. hes so bf

also thank you for all the support on my first post?!? you guys are too sweet im crying. i literally giggle and kick my feet reading your feedback ><

[siriuslylantsov]

canine tendencies

pairing: sirius black x reader

description: in which, you put charms in sirius' hair and confront certain traits of his.

tags: fluff! fem!reader, mmm pining, cuddling, totally platonic activities going on here, r is muggle-born hence the vet and dog anatomy knowledge, sirius is a puppy agenda, pretty women from the 70s mentioned (dont pay much attention to it), flirting.

a/n: staying true to my username with more sirius black. wanna play with his hair for days tbh. happy reading!

wc: 1.7k

“you don't know when to give up, do you?”

you raise your chin indignantly, “i'm stubborn.”

sirius fixes you with a withering glare, it doesn't pack much of a punch but you can tell he's stalling. he finally relents with a long sigh, ever the dramatic. you squeal, walking over to his bed with a little pouch that jingled as you moved. you nudge at his shoulders to lean against the headboard and set yourself down beside him. he grumbles, muttering something along the lines of waste of time and how your neck is gonna hurt. you bite back a smile at his cause for concern: you. 

“complain all you want, but you know this is gonna look good,” you muse, with an air of smugness. “you’ll be singing my praises.”

he lets his head hang to the side, looking at you, up those pretty eyelashes of his. his eyes are indifferent, yet they crinkle at the corners, trying to not prove you right. pools of grey and blue, you could drown in them. 

your elbow is wedged between a pillow and the headboard, propping you up, knees curled, poking into his thigh. his legs are sprawled out in an obnoxious man spread, effectively making you move closer so you don't fall off the bed–that's small enough regardless of the space he's taking up. 

he's avoided you all day since you proposed the idea at breakfast: putting charms in his hair. what's strange is that you’ve done his hair plenty of times before sans protest. you ponder it quietly, simultaneously willing him to concede with squinted eyes, as he deadpans you.

if he could, he would've told you that he’s afraid to be alone with you. not that he hasn't been before, he has and he's been this close to you too (he constantly is). but something is different now, something about your hands in his hair that he can’t deal with. especially recently, you've taken to scratching behind his ear and it drives him a little crazy. he won't stop you though, on account of it feeling so good. usually, you're around the others so he can shift his focus elsewhere rather than think about how softly your fingers pad over his scalp, but now you’re alone and he's cursing lily for dragging his friends to some stupid baking endeavour that he stealthily got out of. 

you watch as annoyance passes over his features (directed to lily but you don't know that) and it instantly worries you. maybe he was serious about not wanting this, were you pushing him?

“sirius, if you really don't want me to do this,” you start, a nervous edge to your fast rush of words, “please tell me. i don't want to force you into doing anything-”

“hey,” he stops you with a hand over your arm and a small reassuring smile. “i'm sorry, i do. i just think you’re hot when you're irritated.”

“you must think i'm farah fawcett all the time then,” you mutter, rooting around in your pouch for the gold cuffs you thought would suit him. “and i'm not irritated, i have a surprising amount of patience for you,” you correct, inspecting the cuffs in your palm.

sirius sits up a bit to peer at them, chewing his lip in thought. “mmm not her. barbara carrera maybe,” he adds, looking back at you, his resistance fading away.

your eyebrows shoot up slightly, in mild shock. “she's pretty,” you remark to his comparison and the seemingly honest delivery.

“yeah,” he says, incredibly earnest, “so are you.”

curious and curiouser. “you think flirting with me is gonna get you out of this?”

“i don't know, is it working?”

“nope,” you say curtly, bring your hand back up to his face, this time with a few charms as well. “pick.”

he does, and sets them in your other hand held out. you begin parting his hair for the braids, you settle for placing them under the top of his hair, since his layers are short they'll peek through nicely. you tie a sloppy half bun to the unused portion of his hair so it's out of the way and section out a piece to braid. 

sirius dutifully holds the gold adornments in his hand as you work, suddenly quiet. he always gets like this, you've noticed. all quip remarks are silenced when your hands are in his hair. you make note to tease him about it later but for now you're content to stay quiet. 

he's humming something quietly, a tune you're unfamiliar with, it's ok he’ll tell you later. it fills the silence nicely. you pick the first charm, looping it into a strand of hair and continuing the braid to secure it. his hair is unbelievably soft, it's probably why you like touching it so much. you both know it gets greasier faster because of your constant contact but sirius makes no move to stop you, ever, simply muttering a spell to revive it. 

it goes on like this for about ten minutes, mostly because the charms were a bit more difficult to work with than you thought and also because you were extremely wary of trying not to tangle his hair. he stares at you diligently out of his periphery and you try not to meet his gaze. 

when you're done you lift the handheld mirror to his face. fuck, he looks beautiful. you have to look away, allowing him to assess everything on his own. 

he shoots you a blinding grin, looking exceedingly pleased with how it turned out, “thanks, dove!”

“you’re welcome,” you respond. “it looks good, right?”

he nods, looking into the mirror again. “really good. you did an amazing job.”

your heart flutters at the praise but you don't let it show, accepting his words with a smug smile. it doesn't last long though as he jumps you with a hug, winding you. arms wrapped around your middle, his head rests on your chest, just below your chin, squeezing you in appreciation. you wrap your arms around him in tandem and lean back against the headboard and the pillows, practically pulling half of him on top of you.

it's rough and tumble for a moment before he settles with a low hum, arms still circled around your torso. he knows they’ll go numb the longer he stays like this but he doesn't care. 

you trail one hand into his hair instinctively, like it's second nature. your nails lightly graze over that spot behind his ear and he’s done for. when you begin scratching, he melts, like truly melts against your body, letting out a long, pleased sigh. he makes note to kick himself later for acting like this. beneath his cheek, he feels you shake. are you laughing?

he lifts his head, a little incredulous. “what?”

you chuckle, seeing how he blinks away the blissful air to his expression. “nothing, it’s just-”

he looks at you expectantly as you contemplate your words.

you let out an amused snort before speaking again, “i don't know if it's, like, a subconscious response to your animagus form but dogs really like being scratched behind their ears.”

he gapes at you, affronted. “are you calling me a dog?”

“you are, padfoot.”

he whines petulantly before dropping back to your chest. he noses at your sternum, his own wordless way of getting you to continue. so you do. 

“dogs have a very concentrated area of nerve endings here,” you explain quietly, scratching his scalp again, just behind his ear. “when stimulated, it causes the brain to release endorphins, making them feel relaxed.”

he hums in thought though it sounds more pleased and it scarcely proves your point. 

“how’d you know that?” he asks, voice muffled by your shirt.

“my friend had to take her cat to the vet and i read one of those pet magazines to pass the time,” you murmur, your voice still quiet as you begin to feel sirius growing heavier over you.

“y’so smart,” he slurs, words trailing off in the beginning of sleep.

“don't fall asleep,” you whisper, though you make no effort to wake him up.

he mumbles something incoherent, nuzzling further into your neck but giving you a little grace by shuffling off of your body. one leg is still tangled with yours and his arms are still tightly wrapped around you but at least he's not crushing you. 

“tell me more,” he requests, words trailing up at the end in question.

you think for a moment, reaching to the depths of your brain to retrieve the dog facts you read about that day, perking up when you do.

“hmmm dogs have incredibly sensitive noses. they have up to, like, 300 million scent receptors, where humans have about 5 million and the part of their brain that processes smells is 40 times larger than ours,” you mumble, tapping a light finger to the tip of his nose. 

“cool,” he exclaims, though it's anything but. his eyes slowly flutter shut as you coil a piece of his hair, sealing your fate for the rest of the evening. that is until, much to sirius’ dismay, his roommates come bursting in.

flour scattered over their clothes and hair alike, they’re boisterous as they enter, chatting something along the lines of baking is actually kinda fun. he groans against your body, sleep stretching far and wide from his grasp. you stifle a laugh as he glares at them annoyedly. they pay no attention to the boy, instead making plans on playing quidditch. to this, he brightens. jumping from the bed at a speed you can't quite justify, not being overly fond of the sport yourself. you were more inclined to flying for fun, rather than competition. 

he glances back at you, tentatively, asking for your permission almost. you shrug indifferently, you were going to make your way down to the field anyway. he grins and leans down, pressing a quick firm kiss to your cheek before rushing after the dwindling voices down the stairs, his own broom in tow. 

you bite your lip to push down the giggle that bubbles up in your throat, maybe there are some innate canine tendencies.

reblogs and replies are appreciated :) | m.list

[moonstruckme]

I'm getting an iud and I'm so so nervous!! I have a super low pain tolerance! Would u be willing to write a fic about reader having to get a procedure done (can be general so more people can relate) and just one of the mauraders being there for her? Like May be she tries to not tell him bc she doesn't want to burden him but he finds out and is shocked and then offers to drive her home after?

tots projecting bc I'm gonna have Uber home and I wish I had a sweet bf driving me

Good for you babe! I hope it's not as scary as you think, thanks for requesting <3 I made this fwb Sirius because I thought it'd be fun, hope you don't mind

cw: vague mention of medical procedure, suggestive/mature content but no smut

fwb!Sirius x fem!reader ♡ 837 words

You pull your shirt on, nerves once again tingling in your fingertips. It’s been on and off all day, the anxiety as you remember the appointment you have scheduled later this week. Sex with Sirius was only a temporary, if pleasant, reprieve. 

“Hey,” he says, pulling you from your thoughts. He’s opening a pack of cigarettes. “Want me to open the window?” 

You nod, hugging your knees to your chest. “Please.” 

Sirius reaches back to unlatch the window by your bed. He looks the polar opposite of you, all stretched out and languid, seemingly having no inclination to cover up whereas you can’t wait more than a couple minutes after sex before putting your clothes back on. Sirius tends to like to cuddle, chatting with you while he maps idle paths over your body with his touch, but you need layers between you; it’s too difficult to keep the lines from blurring, otherwise. 

He lights his cig, letting his head loll off the bed as he breathes in before exhaling in the direction of your window. You wish he wouldn’t smoke at all, but you appreciate how considerate he is about it. He’s not offered to share his pack with you since the first time you refused, and he always does it outside or out the window, depending on the weather. Now, the air coming inside is cool and muggy, enough to have Sirius reaching for the corner of your sheets and tossing them over himself lazily.

“Can I ask you something?” you say, fingers twiddling in front of your tented legs. “You can say no.” 

Sirius’ head tilts up. “When have I ever said no to you?” It’s a question not meant to be answered, so you don’t. “Ask away, gorgeous.” 

You wet your lips. “Do you have anything on Friday?” 

“Mm, this Friday?” 

“Yeah.” 

“I work at three, but nothing before then. Why?” 

“Oh, nevermind then.” You shake your head, guilt and dread intermingling in your gut. You’ll figure something else out. Worst case, you’ll take the bus. It’ll be fine. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“Wait, why?” Sirius sits up, twisting sideways so he can prop himself up on an elbow. The sheet falls down his waist. “What’s Friday?” 

“I’m just…” You shrug, trying to seem nonchalant but no doubt failing miserably. “I have an appointment then, that’s all. It’s not a big deal.” 

“An appointment.” His brow furrows. “Like, the one you talked about making? You’re doing that?” 

“Yeah…” Your voice has gone a bit quiet, nerves and awkwardness shrinking you. 

Sirius shakes his head, appalled. “What, and you just weren’t gonna tell me? Who’s driving you?” 

“Um.” You find yourself looking at the wall beside his shoulder. “I’m not sure yet.” 

“Bollocks. You were going to ask me, weren’t you?” 

Your silence speaks for you. Sirius makes a noise that’s half laugh, half sigh. “Sweetheart,” he stubs his cigarette on the windowsill, sitting up, “I can take off work for that. When is it?” 

“It’s during your shift,” you say, guiltily. “You really don’t have to.” 

He waves you off. “It’s fine, I can get someone to cover for me.” 

You sag a bit with relief. “Thanks, Sirius. If you could meet me around half past four, it should be done by then—” 

“What?” Sirius’ face screws up as though you’ve said something offensive. “No, when does it start? When’s the appointment for?” 

You must look startled, because his expression gentles. 

“Look, babe, I don’t have to sit in there and hold your hand if you don’t want me to, but I can at least drive you there and wait for you to be done. Please, I don’t like the idea of you going alone.” 

“Okay,” you say hesitantly. The idea of having him to hold your hand really doesn’t sound so awful. “It's at three.” 

“Brilliant.” Sirius’ smile blooms at having gotten what he wanted, jovial once more. “Are you nervous?” 

“Yeah,” you admit, still quietly. You’re feeling somewhat more comfortable now that the awkwardness of asking favors has passed, but your general nerves are still there. Sirius seems to pick up on this, leaning forward to clasp both hands around your ankles and drawing circles with his thumbs. 

“You’ll be fine,” he says surely. “We’ll have a pep talk on the way if you need one, and I’ll be there afterwards for whatever you need. You won’t have to lift a finger for the rest of the night.” 

You lift your eyebrows at him. “Are you planning on staying over?” 

He scoffs. “Obviously. Not with any ulterior motives, of course—though I’m never opposed, you know—but someone ought to keep an eye on you. Make sure nothing changes overnight.” 

You’re relaxing some, now, your hands untangling to rest on either side of you on the bed. Sirius’ thumbs continue their diligent soothing of your ankles. 

“It’s not as serious as that, really,” you try to mollify him. “I should be fine soon after.” 

“Mm, nevertheless. I think I’ll stay just in case.”

[daisywinchester]

Sights Unseen- Rafe Cameron x Reader

Rafe Cameron x Routledge!Reader, John B x Sister! Reader

Summary: John B catches sister!Reader with her secret boyfriend, Rafe, and doesn't know how to feel about it.

Words: 1600+

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You knew how John B would react if he ever found out about you and Rafe. Your brother had always been protective of you—perhaps too much at times—and the idea of you, his Pogue sister, dating a Kook, especially Rafe Cameron, would send him into a fury. 

But despite all the risks and complications, you and Rafe had kept your relationship a secret. Late-night walks on the beach, quiet talks in secluded places, stolen moments when no one was watching—those were the ways you saw each other, away from the prying eyes of your brother, Sarah, or anyone else who might find out.

Your love for Rafe was deeper than you could have ever imagined. There was something about him, beyond all the chaos and anger, that made you feel seen. And, even though you knew it was dangerous, you couldn’t help but want to be with him. You both enjoyed the peace the secrecy brought, not having to worry about what others had to think. It was just you and him. You knew it was time to tell your brother, but you wanted to revel in the peace for a little bit longer.

Little did you know how soon that secret would be up.

You had gone down to the beach with Rafe, away from the house. The day was warm, and the sun was beginning to set, painting the sky in hues of orange and purple. You were sitting together against a tree at the edge of the yard you thought was out of sight, laughing about something silly that had happened earlier in the day.  

Your head rested against his shoulder as you shared stories, enjoying each other’s company in the quiet serenity of the late afternoon. You didn’t notice the figure watching you both from a distance, a figure you thought wasn’t going to be around the house until much later.

John B had been looking for you since you weren’t in the house and your phone’s location was around. He figured you had gone to the pier to watch the sunset, but hadn’t expected to find you here, especially who you were here with. When he saw you and Rafe, his stomach twisted with disbelief. The sight of you, so comfortable and happy with Rafe Cameron of all people, sent a rush of anger through him. It was clear you hadn’t seen him, and he was unsure how to approach the situation.  

Part of him wanted to storm over, pull you away from Rafe, and yell at him—at both of you. But another part of him, deep down, knew he should wait back and talk to you about it first. He felt betrayed, but he also couldn’t help feeling a strange knot in his chest when he saw you laugh, your eyes lighting up in a way he hadn’t seen in months.  

“Sarah,” he whispered to get her attention, clenching his jaw as he spotted her walking down the dock looking for him. 

“John B, what are you doing?” Sarah asked in a hushed tone, noticing his tense posture and the fact that he was hiding behind tall grass.

“I can’t believe it. She’s with him, Sarah. She’s with Rafe,” he hissed, anger bubbling in his voice. 

“What?” Sarah’s eyes widened as she got closer to John B and looked at the pair he was pointing at. “He kept denying it but I knew he was seeing someone! I had no idea it was Y/N!”

“I need to go talk to her, to make her see reason.”  John B ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath ready to storm over there.

“No, you don’t,” Sarah said firmly, standing beside him and crossing her arms. “You’re not going to do anything rash. Let’s just take a minute and think this through.”  

“I don’t need time to think. I need to fix this,” John B shot back, but his voice softened when he looked back at you and Rafe.  

Sarah sighed. “John B, listen. I get it. I really do. Shit, he’s my brother. But this isn’t the way to handle it. Maybe you should talk to her first, before you go off on Rafe.”  

“But—”  

“No,” Sarah interrupted, her voice calm but firm. “Just… give it a day. Talk to her when she’s back and you calm down a bit. Just let it be for now.”  

John B hesitated. He wanted to protect you, but he also wanted to understand what was going on. For now, he decided to take Sarah’s advice, but he wasn’t giving up. This wasn’t over.  

---

That night, John B couldn’t sleep. He lay in his bed, tossing and turning, the image of you laughing with Rafe haunting him. The joy in your eyes had shaken him to his core. He hadn’t seen you so happy in a long time—since before Dad went missing. The weight of that memory was always there, a constant reminder of how much your family had lost. He had thought that, maybe, if he kept you close, protected you from people like Rafe, you’d find some sense of stability. But now, with Rafe in the picture, everything felt off balance.

He needed to talk to you. To figure this out.

Slipping out of bed, he made his way down the hallway toward your room, but when he opened the door, his heart sank. Your bed was empty. The room was dark, but the window was cracked open, letting in the cool night air. He knew where you were.

John B headed down to the treeline, where he had seen you earlier, moving quietly through the dark. He could hear the sound of your voice, but the closer he got, the more he realized what was happening.  

He stopped, ducking behind a nearby tree to stay hidden. You and Rafe were talking softly, the dim light from the house casting long shadows on the edge of the nearest end of  the dock where you were sitting now. He could hear snippets of your conversation, but he wasn’t prepared for what happened next.

You laughed. The sound was light, genuine, carefree, something John B hadn’t heard from you in so long. Of course you still laugh, but hearing the old, heartfelt laugh again brought over a wave of emotion. He froze, watching from the shadows, his heart aching.  

He watched as Rafe leaned in, his voice low, and for a moment, he was struck by how tender Rafe was with you. The Kook who’d once seemed so cold and distant was now holding you in a way that made John B question everything he thought he knew. The way his face softened when he looked in your eyes as he so gently tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear.

He couldn’t deny it—Rafe made you happy. And, for the first time in a long while, that happiness was something John B had no control over.

John B stayed hidden, watching you and Rafe interact, the jealousy and anger in his chest slowly turning into confusion. As he eavesdropped, he realized something he hadn’t before: you were different when you were with him. You were laughing, smiling, truly happy in a way that John B had been trying to make happen for months. It was as if the burden of everything that had happened—your dad’s disappearance, the constant unknowing—was finally lifted, even if just for a moment.  

John B exhaled slowly, his anger dissolving into something softer. He wanted to protect you, to make sure you were safe, but he also realized that he couldn’t control everything. He couldn’t force you to be someone you weren’t. He didn’t have the right to take your happiness away just because he didn’t understand it.

“I want you to be happy, Y/N,” John B whispered to himself, his hand gripping the side of the tree he was peering past. “Even if I don’t get it.”

After a long moment of hesitation, he finally stepped out from the shadows, deciding not to interrupt. He watched you and Rafe for a while longer, knowing now that the only thing that mattered was your happiness. 

---

The next day, when John B saw you, he didn’t immediately confront you about Rafe. Instead, he pulled you aside quietly, his expression serious but softer than it had been.  

“I’m not happy about it, but I saw you with Rafe last night” he started, his voice low as your eyes widened and you gasped. He put up his hand before you could try to say anything. “I don’t like that you’re with him. There’s a lot that I don’t understand, but I get it now. Last night when I saw you with him,” he paused, and took a deep breath as if he was about to admit something to you and himself. “You were happy; a happiness that I haven’t seen in a long time. I’ve noticed lately you’ve been different, and now I know it’s because of Rafe. I don’t like the guy- I mean, hell Y/N, you picked the biggest asshole on the island? Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say is you seem really happy and that’s all that matters. Just… be careful, okay?”  

You smiled, relieved, but still hesitant. “You’re not angry?”

John B shrugged, his gaze meeting yours. “I’m angry at myself for not seeing it sooner. But I just want you to be safe, Y/N. If Rafe’s really the one who makes you happy, then I can’t stand in the way of that.”  

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you gave him a tight hug. “Thank you, John B. I love you.” 

“I love you too,” he said softly, patting your back. “Just don’t go full Kook on me, alright?” You laughed, and John B heard that laugh again from last night, that pure, unburdened laugh. And in that moment, he knew he’d made the right decision, no matter how difficult it was.  

Because as long as you were happy, that was enough.

[bloodsuckingfiends]

Take Care of You

Summary: Tav's selflessness does not go unnoticed by Astarion, but so doesn't the way her selflessness is at the expense of her own well-being. He decides to take it into his own hands to take care of her... in more ways than one.

Pairing: Astarion x fem! Tav (reader)

Warnings: Tav overworks herself and neglects her own needs/selfcare, smut, fingering (Tav is AFAB), feminine pet names used, praise kink, I think that's it!

Word Count: 1.3k+

A/N: I have brainworms again and need to get this out sooooo enjoy?

Oftentimes, Astarion found that Tav tended to the needs of others, but very rarely to any needs of her own. He had witnessed Tav spend the last 3 days taking care of everyone, including himself in various ways that had her now looking, and surely feeling, absolutely exhausted. As he stood outside his tent, eyes scanning the camp setup before him, his gaze zeroed in on his Tav who was currently starting the fire, and helping to set up Gale’s various cooking tools and ingredients. A soft smile tugged at his lips just at the mere sight of her, before turning to a frown. As it was, Gale was away from camp, surely bathing off the day’s blood and grime along with their other companions, as Tav readied everything for their return. Her hair was crusted with blood, as was her armor, and her cheeks were streaked with dirt. Her eyes ringed with purple, tell tale signs of her exhaustion.

With a sigh, Astarion makes his way across camp, coming to stand beside Tav,

“Darling, I must say, you do look absolutely ravishing in red, but don’t you think it’s a good idea to get cleaned up?” She looks up at him with doe eyes, hands not stilling in their endeavor to help.

“Oh I don’t mind waiting. The others won’t be long, and besides, I just want to help set up for Gale. He’s always so kind as to make dinner for everyone, so this is me paying him back.”

Astarion manages to internalize his eye roll, and hold his tongue from pointing out that Tav has saved the wizard plenty of times in battle to make up for the meager stew that’s served nearly daily.

He places a hand on her shoulder, before pulling back and dusting the dried blood off his hand, “I just worry that you haven’t been taking care of yourself, is all.” a clear of his throat does well to cover the awkwardness he feels at saying such a vulnerable thing to her. 

“I’m alright Star, no need to worry.” She gives him a glance and a little smile.

“I don’t mean to be blunt darling, but you look positively dreadful and like you could use a nap. Please, let me take care of you.” Astarion huffs, frustrated at her stubbornness. Tav straightens up and turns, her eyes meeting his almost pleading ones, “Okay, I’ll let you take care of me.” Her voice comes out a quiet murmur. There was no denying him when he gave her that look.

The others arrive back to camp not long after Astarion gathers fresh clothes, a comb, and toiletries for Tav. He leads her to a secluded spot along the shore of a small lake they are camped by, before unbuckling and removing her heavy armor and underclothes, leaning forwards to press a kiss to her forehead as he does so. He strips himself of his own clothes, regardless of having bathed earlier that evening, taking Tav’s hand in his own and bringing her to the water. Astarion gets to work, lathering the soap between his hands, and gently scrubbing the filth from Tav’s body and face, a shiver running through her at his touch. He has her fully dip underwater, then begins to work the soap through the blood drenched strands of her hair, massaging at her scalp with his fingertips. Tav lets a moan slip past her lips.

“Does that feel good darling?” Astarion chuckles as he brings the soap down to the ends of her hair.

She mumbles an affirmative, her eyes flutter shut. 

“Alright, there we go. Just rinse this out for me, will you, love?” 

Tav dips back below the surface, thoroughly rinsing out her locks. When she resurfaces, Astarion can’t help but bite his lip at the sight. The water rolling down her neck, over her breasts as she pushes her hair away from her face. She looks like a painting, he thinks. 

The two dry off, and Tav dresses in the clothes that Astarion had brought along for her; a pair of loose trousers, and one of his ruffled night shirts she so loved to steal. Once in Astarion’s tent, the vampire sits, patting the space between his legs and motioning for Tav to take a seat. She obeys, and sits while he starts to comb her hair.

“How are you feeling, my dear?” he hums, fingers beginning to plait her hair.

“I’m okay. I guess I didn’t realize how tired I am.” Tav yawns, her hands mindlessly playing with a loose thread on his trousers.

“Tav, you really must take care of yourself. You put everyone, including myself, before you. It’s really no wonder you’re so exhausted.” he ties off the braid with a piece of leather. His arms come around to wrap over Tav’s chest, holding her against his own and pressing a kiss to the side of her neck.

“I just want to help everyone, and I guess I lose myself in the process.” a chill runs through her at the feel of his lips on her sensitive skin. 

“Darling, do you think you could try to lose yourself in me, just for a moment, hm?” his tongue flicks against the edge of  her jaw. 

She gasps in a breath, and stutters, “ye-yes, I think I could do that.” 

“Let me take care of you.” One hand whispers across her chest, lightly cupping one breast in it’s hold, before trailing down her stomach, and dancing along the waist of her trousers, “Let’’s take these off.”

Tav shimmies her pants over her hips and down her legs, toeing them off to the side. Astarion runs his hands down her naked thighs, hooking beneath them to lift them and rest them over the tops of his, successfully spreading her open for him. Her breath catches in her chest, the cool air hitting her already sensitive cunt.

“My my, look at you. You’re already positively dripping.” He dips his fingers below and runs his middle finger through her wet, swollen slit, opposite hand running up her ribcage, grasping at her breasts and teasing at her nipples. He toys at her entrance, teasing the tips of his fingers in  her before pushing slowly inside. Tav moans, her chest heaving slightly at the intrusion. 

“That’s it, such a good girl taking my fingers like this.” Astarion coos in her ear, nose pressed to her cheek. He begins to pump his digits in and out, crooking them just enough to rub at that spot that makes her mewl. 

“Just feel how good I’m making you feel, my love.” The pace of his fingers picks up, and his other hand pinches at one of her nipples. 

“St-Star, I’m close.” her head falls back against his shoulder, throat exposed for his mouth’s taking. Thighs shake against his as she nears her end. He sucks and licks at the flesh of her throat, fingers continuing their pace. The hand playing with her breasts, makes its way down to circle her swollen clit. Tav whines at the contact, hands grip at his forearms, grounding her to the moment. 

“That’s it, pet. Come for me. Come around my fingers, I want to feel it.” 

Her cunt spasms around him, thighs quaking and hips lifting to meet his movements. Moans fly past her lips, as she rides out her orgasm. Astarion slows his fingers as she comes down from her high, “Shh shh shh, there we go.” Tav looks back at him, a blissed out, glassy look to her eyes. “There you are, darling. How did that feel?” 

She tries to regulate her breathing, “So good.” she manages to reply.

He grabs a cloth, and cleans her up, then slips back on her underclothes and trousers. 

“Come here, my love.” He scoops her up and lays her down, her head upon his chest, as he pulls the bedroll and blankets around the two of them. 

“Thank you Star, for taking care of me.” Tav mumbles as she drifts off and gets the much needed rest that she deserves.

[madamechrissy]

Silent Serenades

♔ An arranged Marriage with Duke Gojo ♔

♔ Pairings: Duke Satoru Gojo x Duchess Reader

♔ Content/Warnings: TW: period sex scene, I'll mark if you wanna skip- angsty asf always but more fluff, A LOT OF SMUT THIS CHAP, cunnilingus, fingering, blow jobs, rough sex, dirty talk, name calling, low key breed kink, mentions of past cheating

♔ Word count: this chap: 12.2k

♔ Summary: you are the diamond of the season, he is the charming Duke, it’s the marriage of the decade. Prominent families joining, and it so happens that Duke Gojo is gorgeous. But, he doesn't want you at all, leaving you a crying mess on your wedding night, alone. Now you're trapped in a loveless arranged marriage that destroys you from within. Royal AU, Cruel Duke Gojo x reader. OOC Set in 1800s England. Gojo is awful in this. You'll hate Satoru, warning you now. HEAVY angst Basically- Gojo is a royal dick and doesn't wanna marry you

Comments and Reblogs appreciated if you enjoyyy <3

Part Eleven ♔ Masterlist ♔ Playlist

Part Twelve

“Please, don’t fight. Especially here.” You say softly, and the two of them look down at you, Satoru’s blue eyes are furious and Nanami’s hazel ones seem devastated, filling you with so much guilt you can’t stand.

“There are many people looking already.” Hiromi says, worried expression on his face.

“Then we’ll go somewhere else.” Satoru says through gritted teeth.

“Absolutely.” Nanami agrees, cracking his knuckles, your stomach feels sick as they start walking out, you follow them, gently pulling on Satoru’s hand, he grips yours in his, eyes now glassy as he scowls at Nanami, jaw clenched so hard you see a blue vein under his pale skin popping up.

“Satoru…” He clutches your hand then, looking at you, and you tense, preparing for a blow. Surely he’ll down you for what you’ve caused, surely he’s furious…

“I’m not mad at you.” He says softly, shocking you then, your jaw is dropped open, he’s letting you go though now that you all are literally in an alleyway, hidden from others. It’s dark and cold as he lets you go, walking up chest to chest with Nanami, leaving Hiromi to look back nervously behind you all.

“Nanami…” He begins again.

“How do you think you have any right to walk up on me and my wife, shouldn’t you be baking fucking cookies?” Satoru shoves him then, and Nanami laughs without humor, rolling up his sleeves to reveal the strong forearms. He’s way bigger than Satoru is, even though Satoru is very muscular, and you instantly fear for him.

“I do a lot more than bake cookies, your Grace.” Nanami says, shoving Satoru back now, but he barely moves, looming taller over him, rolling his own sleeves up now to reveal his veined forearms and clenched fists.

“Like trying to steal wives?”

“Steal, you didn’t even want her!”

You feel tears prick your eyes at the words, at the memories, and Satoru pauses for a moment now, brows together. “I always wanted her.”

“Sure you did, remember I was at that masquerade, and I was right next to your chambers.” His eyes dart to you now. “You had no problem having women scream, how do you have a right to act like some doting husband now? Having her afraid to eat a fucking cookie.”

Satoru pauses again, raking a hand through his hair, your heart is racing as you watch them, unable to speak. “I was terrible, but it gives you no excuse to literally take what’s mine. Do you know I can duel you for what you did to her?”

“It was her choice. She asked me.” Satoru looks at you now, and you want to sink into a fucking hole. “Several times. Over and-”

Satoru punches him then, right in the jaw, Nanami grunts, only to punch Satoru, instantly splitting his lip. Satoru licks the blood, laughing. “And she was an innocent girl, she didn’t even know what it was.”

“She saw you plenty.” Nanami punches again, Satoru ducks, you’re fighting the urge to throw up as Satoru pins him to the wall. “What, now you want her? Because I was going to marry her?”

“You never had a chance, baker boy. She never loved you.”

“And you think she loves you? She’s just young and naive.”

“She’s not naive, she knows what she wants, and it isn’t you. Unh…” Nanami punches Satoru right in the stomach, making him hunch over, only for you to run between them now, holding your arms out, glaring up at Nanami, whose strong chest is huffing up and down.

“Get out of the way, Duchess. I have more to say.” Nanami says, and you shake your head now. “You’ll protect him after what he did? He almost broke you.”

“I know he did, and I know you helped me, and Nanami I thank you for being there, but… I ended things.” You say quietly, he shakes his head, scowling over you, when Satoru’s hands come to your waist possessively, making him furious.

“So what you immediately did what I said you would?” He demands, eyeing you and raising a brow, you tremble now, feeling emotions overwhelm you.

“You don’t get to judge her. Mr. Fucks Married Women.” Satoru has you behind him now, shoving Nanami again.

“You hadn’t even fucked her yet, you mad I was first?”

“Really, stop!” You are pressed aside as Nanami is punched in the stomach by Satoru again, he punches Satoru so hard you hear a sickening crack, panicking. “Will you two-”

“Nanami, you can’t do this.” Hiromi says. “He’s a Duke.”

“And he’s a fucking piece of shit, who slaps women and downs them.” Nanami wipes blood off his lip, and Satoru’s furious, literally shaking.

“Yeah I was a piece of shit, but guess what, you’re no knight in shining armor, you took advantage.”

“Me!? I’m nothing like you.” Satoru pins Nanami to the wall now, as you and Hiromi look at each other.

“Can you get through to him?” You whisper, and he sighs, shaking his head as he looks down.

“He’s in love with you, how do you fix that?” You feel the guilt clawing at your heart as you look on with horror at them, at the man you couldn’t love enough, and the man you can’t stop loving.

“You are more like me than you think, I heard you, I saw you with her, and instead of killing you like you fucking deserve, I let you go. Now you’re coming up to me like this? Who the fuck do you think you are?”

“Someone who actually loves her, who cares, who wants to beat you to a pulp for how much you broke her. Do you know how far down she was? How she hated herself because of you? I knew her before you ruined her.”

“Ruined me…” You whisper, choking back tears, but of course they can’t hear with their own blood pumping in their ears.

“She’s not ruined, despite my efforts, she’s strong, and yes I was shit for it, but it’s not you who gets to come at me. She can.”

“She won’t, she’s too sweet and caring, she cares about you when she sure fucking shouldn’t.”

“Nanami, please just… talk to me.” You ask then, and he glances at you, clear hurt all over his chiseled features.

“You can’t truly want this.” He says, and you sigh.

“I do want to be with him, I’m sorry… but I do.”

Nanami tenses, glaring. “What have you done to her so quickly?” Nanami asks, and Satoru smirks then, leaning close.

“I don’t know, had her cumming all over-” Nanami punches him again, now Satoru’s stumbling into a wall, earning your glare.

“Satoru, really?” You demand with a hiss.

“You’re mad I had her first, aren’t you?”

“Nanami!” You glare now, Satoru’s enraged at him.

“You’re bragging about taking my wife’s virginity? When she was hurt and vulnerable-”

“Hurt by you. By you. Can’t admit it?” Nanami has him snatched up by his suit now, crumbling the bright blue fabric, clenching his fist again as Satoru struggles out of his hold.

“I admit it, time for you to admit your fault.”

“I don’t have any fault in falling in love with her, when you threw her away like she was nothing. Why wouldn’t I fall for her?” You hear the emotions in his voice, usually so composed, Satoru is quiet for a moment, stopping the struggle.

“You don’t even know her, of course you think you’re in love, she’s everything… she’s beautiful, she’s amazing, she’s sweet… she’s also a fucking mess, she’s reckless, feisty and short tempered. She cusses like a man, and she’s most importantly her own person. She didn’t choose you.”

“She’s too blinded by you, by your manipulation. Is this what you do, treat her like shit until you almost lose her?”

“I’ll never forgive myself for what I did to her.” Satoru says then, voice breaking, you can barely look at them, breasts heaving with your breaths, tears falling hot and sticky down your cheeks.

“And she’s forgiven you already.”

“She has, but I won’t forgive myself. And I won’t forgive you, for taking what was never yours, you call me manipulative when you did worse. You would sleep with a virgin-”

“Please stop!” You beg, but it falls on deaf ears.

Satoru grins psychotically now. “She didn’t like it, baker.”

“Oh, she came on my-”

“Now!” You shove at them both again, huffing and turning to Nanami. “Don’t, no more please.”

Nanami’s brows lower. “How can you defend him?”

“He’s… I… I love him. I do.”

Nanami is quiet now, as is Satoru, so quiet you can hear the blood rushing through your veins. You know this will hurt him more, but it’s going too far. “You don’t know what you feel.”

“Stop speaking for her, she can speak for her fucking self just fine.” You glare at Satoru now.

“That’s enough out of you, both of you. Acting like children, fighting over their favorite toy. Nanami, I know you’re hurt, let us talk. Stop this.”

“Stop fighting for your honor?” He demands, leaning down now.

“She doesn’t need you to fight for her goddamn honor, she’s no damsel in distress. She was happy this morning, for once.”

“As if you could truly make her happy. And no, no one should treat women like you do.” Nanami shoves at Satoru again.

“So is it your knight tendencies or did you really love her?” He asks, raising a brow, and Nanami’s seething now.

“Don’t pretend to know anything about me. How much has she cried over you, and your endless cruelty?”

Satoru blinks, white lashes trembling over his gaze. “Well I’m not cruel now, and I’m fucking trying. She is my wife.”

“For now.”

“Jesus christ. Nanami… come talk to me.” Satoru grabs your arm then, glaring at you. “Let me talk to him.”

“Touch her again and I’ll fucking end you.” Satoru says, and Nanami smirks, tilting his head.

“Oh will you now?”

“Enough!” You drag Nanami further down the alleyway, as he’s brushing himself off, and Satoru’s stomping away, Hiromi turns around to give you both privacy. “This is too much, you must stop this, I’m not worth your efforts.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” Nanami cups your face, bending low.

“You mean to get killed!?”

“You deserve someone to fight for you, for what he did, it wasn’t right and you know it.”

You grip his wrists now, and something feels so wrong about this, about his hands on you, when just days ago you welcomed them. “I appreciate you, I truly do, but I don’t need you to fight my fights. I am capable.”

“Capable of being manipulated?”

You glare now, taking his hands off. “You’re hurt.”

“Yes I am hurt, how can you be…” He leans close now. “How can you be cumming all over my cock, how can I have taken your innocence, and then you just… you just…”

You feel sick now, barely able to stand the thoughts of what you’ve done, and how deeply he was affected. The memories feel so long ago when they just were days ago. “I shouldn’t have slept with you. I’m so sorry for it.”

“What!? No…”

“No I never should have. You’re right, I asked for it, and I never should have done it. I shouldn’t have kissed you that day, I should have been friendly and moved on. Because I’ve destroyed you, and I care for you so much. Watching you… like this… I can’t…” You’re sobbing now, covering your mouth and shaking, Nanami gulps, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.

“I can’t regret being with you. How could I?”

“You should! You should.”

“All I can think of is you, and to see you kissing him. Happy? How the fuck can I be all right with this!?” He’s gripping your shoulders now. “I’ve never felt what I felt with you.”

“I don’t feel the same.” You’re speaking between sobs now, shaking your head as you hurt him more. “I never did, Nanami. I enjoyed you, I respect you… you’re handsome and perfect, I wanted to. I did. Wanted to love you like you love me, but what I feel isn’t enough for you.”

“How do you even know-”

“I’m in love with him, the undying love you think you feel. The need to constantly be with him, the consuming need in my heart. It’s for him, Nanami. I didn’t want you to be hurt more, but it’s true. I do.” Nanami’s eyes glimmer, and you hate yourself. “You deserve to be chosen. You do.”

“You’re foolish.”

“Maybe I am. But I love him. Despite it all, despite every terrible thing he did, I fall deeper every moment. I didn’t feel it for you, I felt… I felt affection, desire.”

“Just affection and desire?” He repeats, raising a brow.

“You’ll make someone happy. Someone who deserves all the love you have, and Nanami… you have to let me go.”

“Let you go?” His voice is broken, his handsome face just falling and you feel it like a punch in your stomach, the ties of your bodice tighter now, as if they’re strangling you. “Did this mean nothing to you?”

You shake your head, gloved fingers swiping at the hot sticky tears that fall. “No, it meant so very much to me, your kindness, your care… what we did however, I think I acted on impulse, I didn’t think it through. I was hurt. I should have never taken it as far as we did.”

He sighs now, emotions glimmering in his own gaze, cupping your face with one of those rough hands, thumb brushing a tear. “He is correct on one thing, I had a fault in this, I carried on with you. I let my desire cloud my judgement.”

“You have no fault here. He is merely upset, I’ve upset you both, hurt you both. I told you, it’s what I do.” Your shoulders shake with your cries, and he is tense now, shaking his head.

“No, I was at fault, you were so upset that day. I should have told you no, but I wanted you so badly. Then I wanted to make it right somehow, what I did. Do you know I would have given you everything? Anything you wanted?” You just nod, eyes closing, more tears falling. “It’s not what he can give but-”

“It is not about that, it never has been. I know you would.” You take his hand now, kissing it and resting your forehead on it. “It’s that I am not your person. Deep down, I think you already know.”

Nanami pauses, hand clutching your tightly, you feel his hurt through his every breath, and it stabs you and twists you in your heart. “I can’t just fall out of love with you. You can’t expect that.”

“I know. I know. But please, let it go. Please open your heart to someone who will not crush it. I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you.” Nanami gulps now, blinking rapidly, easing his hand down finally, still entwined with yours.

“You deserve better than him, I don’t care what you’ve done. I will let you live your life, you won’t see me again.” Your heart shatters into pieces as he backs away, knowing that someone you cared so much for is gone forever, but you know it’s what is best for him, you know you finally have done the right thing, ending it so he can move on.

But it hurts, fuck it hurts.

“Did you ever even care, I’m curious? Or was I just for amusement?” You sense his voice, he is more terse with how he speaks, and who can blame him?

“How can you say that! Yes I cared. But it wasn’t enough.”

“Just enough until he wanted you? Was it to get him to want you?” You’re shattering more at his words.

“You’re unexpectedly cruel right now.” You whisper, and he looks away now, hands clenching at his sides.

“I am curious about your motives, I mean no cruelty. Before I never see you again I’d like to know. If you used me to get him.”

“If anything I assumed it would make him hate me more, but no, I did it because you made me feel beautiful, desired, when I felt so unwanted. You made me feel special, seen and heard. You are a sweet, loving person, and of course I wanted to feel loved. But it shouldn’t have been at your expense. Why did you do it? Since we’re asking.” You say softly, his eyes lock back on you.

“Because I felt something for you, even that night we met.” His voice drops an octave. “Also, because I wanted to save you, to fix you somehow, you seem so very broken.”

“Fix me?” You sigh now, shaking your head. “I fear I’m no easy fix.”

“You certainly are not.” He takes your hand once more, you notice the blood on the backs of his knuckles. “I wanted to do right by you, I never meant to dishonor you, to just sleep with you on a whim.”

“I know you did. I never expect you to forgive me, but I hope you find happiness, I hope you find everything you deserve.” You say, and he has two tears fall, as he brings your hand higher towards his lips.

“I wanted you.” He kisses the backs of your fingers now, you can feel the gaze of Satoru behind you, Nanami’s eyes lock with his over your head now.

“I’m honored you did, I’m honored I knew you Nanami Kento.” You say softly, in between sniffles and cries. He tilts his head, a little softer, a little less angry, sandy blond hair falling just a bit over his furrowed brow.

 “I will let you go, and wish you whatever happiness you wish in life. You deserve happiness, whether you think so or not, Duchess.”

“Th-thank you, I wish the same for you Mr. Nanami. Truly, with everything in me, I hope for your happiness.” Your voice is hoarse as you hold back further tears, and Mr. Nanami bows his head, finally stepping away.

“Farewell, Duchess.” He tips his hat to you, surprisingly still on his head after the fight with Satoru, and he walks away, past Satoru now, who is glaring at him with unbridled fury. “You don’t deserve her.” He says tersely.

“I know I don’t.” Satoru says, his own voice broken completely, and Nanami’s shoulders relax just a bit. “But I’ll do everything to keep her.”

“Then do good by her.” Nanami looks at you one more time, and there’s no soft smile, no sweet eyes, they’ve gone cold, emotionless, ending you further when he leaves with his friend. Satoru’s eyes catch yours, and he’s on you in mere moments, as you nearly collapse.

“I’m horrible, I’m terrible, I’m-”

“You’re just a girl. You’re just a human being. Stop it.” Satoru cups your face, and his hands feel so calming, his presence somehow soothes everything inside you, and it had for longer than you care to admit.

Even when he caused your panic attack, you loved his soothing touch, his words. Being held by him even when you hated him, despised him. Now he comforts you for losing your lover, something he should hate you for, but there is understanding in his gaze, in his eyes, blue and glimmering, a cheek swollen, blood on his perfect lips, which you caress softly.

“Do you hate me?” You whisper, and he shakes his had.

“No, how could I ever? How could I ever hate you for doing what I did, for being pushed to. Even when I said I did… I do not hold anything against you. Him though?” Satoru’s eyes narrow. “He’s so clearly wanting what I have.”

“He will move on. And be better for it.”

“No one is better without you, Princess.” His words melt you, then you’re assessing him, seeing the injuries.

“You’re hurt. We need to go home.” You say, and he grins suddenly, an insanely huge grin, splitting his lip further. “Be careful!”

“You said home.” He whispers, pulling you flush against him now. You laugh softly, shaking your head, arms wrapped around his neck.

“Aren’t you furious at me!? In this situation?”

“Oh I’m furious at him, I want to kill him with my bare fucking hands, but you saying that it’s your home? That overtakes damn near anything.” He picks you up in his arms, as you cling to him, dangling like you’re nothing, his madness fucking infectious, you start to smile yourself.

“I need to take care of these cuts, so yes, let’s go home.”

“You’re so oddly calm, Satoru.” You murmur later, delicately cleaning the wound on his lip, on his eyebrow with a little cloth. Satoru’s sitting on a chair in the living room, there is no longer a table, Satoru’s gotten rid of it and ordered another, a pleasant and amusing surprise earlier.

“I’m getting nursed by this sexy Princess right now. I’m content.” You snort, shaking your head, beginning to tape his slice on his forehead closed, he flinches just a bit, so you blow on it soothingly, earning his hands pressing against the nip of your waist, squeezing, eyes on your decolletage.

“Are you staring at my breasts!?”

“They’re in my face. Yes.” You roll your eyes. “Are you all right?”

“Yes, I am. I feel terrible for what I caused…”

“He’s not innocent, he is a grown man, and knows what he got into. I think you put too much guilt upon yourself.” Satoru’s tongue laps out at your skin, right against your collarbone, you feel your body tense at it, tummy clenching in desire.

“I hurt him.”

“I hurt you.” You look down at his perfect face, his brows together, lips pursed just so, and his endless stormy blue eyes. Every moment makes you ache, every second he stares at you, you feel yourself falling impossibly deeper.

“You did hurt me. I think I hurt you in response, however, at his expense. He brought up that I used him.”

“He clearly was in love with you, I saw it all over his face.” Satoru says, hands sliding down further, until his hands are on your outer thighs, fingers pressing in under the satin skirts. “I don’t blame him for punching me, I’m furious because I hate that he touched you, but I can’t blame him. I’d have done it too.”

“You would not have!”

“I would have for you. Why did you have to lose your virginity to a boxer, do you know how bad my ribs hurt?” He says with a glare, and suddenly you burst into laughter, as does he, hand raking through his silken white locks.

“Oh, Satoru… at least you have not slept with a boxer.”

“Or have I?” He’s grinning deviously.

“You’re ridiculous. If it makes you feel better, I regret it very much.” You get on your knees now, gently unbuttoning his tunic, checking his bruised abdomen, he winces a bit as your fingers brush against his rib cage.

“Do you regret him being your first? I thought you did not.” He’s brushing your hair now, as you press a cool patch against him, he exhales in relief.

“I regret it, even if I still do not think you deserved to be my first. I still hurt another person, and I… looking back I don’t believe I enjoyed it much.”

“Interesting take, considering you let me know how much you loved sex.” You flush now, looking back up at his gaze.

“I embellished, to rub it in. I wanted to hurt you. Like you hurt me. You brought a darkness out in me…”

“I know I did. I know.” Satoru takes the cold cloth from your hand, setting it down now, bending in his seat as you kneel between his spread thighs, brushing your hair back delicately. “I still hate him for touching you, for having you first. I only did not kill him because I love you so fucking much. I know you care for him.”

“I do care. He is not a bad person, Satoru, he’s a good person.”

“Perhaps he is, but do you know what I realized?” Satoru’s thumb traces your lip now, swollen from biting it so much.

“What is that?”

“He’s not in your heart.”

“No, he is not. It’s got a rather slutty and whorish Duke overtaking it.” Satoru raises a brow at that, your fingers are caressing delicately where he is bruised, over his perfect muscles, flexing as he sucks in a breath.

“Perhaps you should make it up, your former lover punching my pretty face.” You snort then. “You think I’m jesting, bratty girl?”

“Indeed, you are. You deserved a hit for being terrible.” Satoru reaches down now, unbuttoning his trousers, his hard, thick length slapping his belly button, and you feel heat pooling between your thighs.

“Open your mean little mouth.” He orders softly, you shift on your knees as he sits up, obediently opening your mouth, for him to grab your hair, shoving his cock inside of it. “Oh fuck… your mouth is so…”

“Mmm…” You’re moaning as he is, sucking on his cock and looking right into his eyes, the most heady thing, his huge hands enwrapping in your locks as you suck him greedily, feeling him hitting the back of your throat.

“Take all of it, Princess.” He whispers now, and you pull back with a pop, saliva dripping in strings from his pretty tip.

“All of it!?”

“Relax that throat, you can do it.” You struggle to breathe through your nose now, taking more and more of him with every sloppy stroke, now he’s fucking your face and throat, and you can’t stand how good it feels. He hisses then as you sink all the way down, throat bulging with him, his hand touches it now. “That’s it, slutty throat, she can take me.”

You press even deeper, feeling him stretch and burn your throat now, nose flush against the thin white patch of his hair, he’s whimpering now, your eyes are watering, but you continue, sucking him, over and over, cunt dripping wet as your hands brace on his thighs for stability. You feel him thickening now, as he bucks up into your throat, rougher and rougher.

“Th-that’s it… Princess you… s’good, f-fuck…” He's falling apart, using your throat to bring himself closer and closer. “Bet he didn’t use you like this, bet he was all sweet, hmm?”

You glare and he’s lost it, cupping your face and moving more and more, mumbling incoherently.

“I’ll use your bratty fucking mouth, so you can’t talk, what do you think?” He slaps your cheek gently, you’re moaning more against him now, urging him on. “Fuck every memory out of your pretty head.”

You want to tell him, they’re already long gone, that all there is now is him, even when he’s speaking like this, it just makes you want him more, the duality of him, so dirty but sweet. Fucking you so brutally one moment to worship your entire body the next, calling you a beautiful Princess then a slutty brat. You want it all, you want every bit of the Duke.

“Going to drink up all my seed, aren’t you? Greedy little whore.” He mutters now, fucking your throat harder, you gasp for breath as he pummels it, reaching down to touch yourself, you’re so wet and needy. “No.”

Satoru yanks your fingers up like he did last time, leaving you to whine out, as he sucks on them greedily, continuing to pump your mouth.

“She is mine, only I touch her, unless I tell you to.” Satoru moans louder now, hips stuttering. “You’re so wet already I bet. Think I should touch you?”

You shake your head, sucking harder, saliva and precum dripping down his veiny cock, and his eyes are dilated, so dark, eyes lidded as he watches you suck him, throat hurting so bad tears are pouring. But you’re wetter now, grinding against nothing, wanting him so badly you can’t think, like he is fucking your brain, like he has been since you first kissed him truly.

“If you take all this cum and swallow I’ll touch you, greedy little Princess. Can you do it?” You simply suck harder, glaring, and he smirks. “Such a good- fuck!”

Satoru’s pumping now, all his hot gooey cum pouring down your throat, you swallow it hungrily. His cock slows now, backing away, throbbing as you swirl your tongue around it, looking into his eyes as you take him all. You’re gulping all of his seed down, lapping more and more up out of the little hole on his tip, now he’s panting, hands shaking.

“Oh my… you…” Satoru pulls out with a suctioned pop, his cock glistening with all of your spit. “Open up.”

You eagerly do, tongue out, and he moans.

“Fuck you took it all. Perfect, pretty, slutty Princess.” He picks you up off your knees now, bringing you against him, between his legs, cock still semi hard as it falls against his pelvis, nestled against his white pubic hair.

“Did I make it up to you, Duke?” You tease softly, coughing just a bit and rubbing your now sore throat.

“Oh you did. Took me so good, you’re so good for me. I want to be all you ever think about, I want to consume your fucking mind.” He whispers now, standing and looming so tall over you now, his shirt half opened, his pants undone, hair falling so messy.

“You stupid man.” He glares, as you do. “You think you don’t already consume me!? You think you’re not my every waking thought? You think you’re not my madness, my obsession?”

He gasps now, eyes darting back and forth across your face, hands squeezing your head so tight you wince. “You feel it too? The… insanity?”

“I feel it, Satoru. I’m insane for you, insane to be with you. You are all that is here.” You put his hand on your head. “And all that is here.” Now you put his hand on your heart. “And… all that is here.” You take it and press it lower, your lower tummy now, earning his molten gaze, slender nostrils flaring. “All I ever want is you.”

“You’re all I will ever want. You’re everything to me. Please, please stay, please…” He’s tearing up now, and you nod, feeling his every emotion.

“I’m not going anywhere, foolish Duke.”

“God I love you.” He slams his lips on yours finally, and you feel it, the blood pouring from his lips, you back away carefully.

“Your wound-”

“Look at you, covered with me.” He moans now, swiping the blood across your lips, you feel it so warm and you taste it, like copper.

“You’re fucking insane.” He smirks now, leaning forward again.

“I am, but so are you, Princess. Aren’t you?” You just nod weakly, and he’s kissing you again, taking over every part of your body and soul, you tremble as his tongue entwines with yours, tasting himself off your lips, now mixed with the bit of blood still falling. “You’re mine, all mine. Say it, Princess.”

“You just fucked my throat is that not enough?” He laughs, picking you up, wincing. “You should not, you’re hurt.”

“Fuck all that, I care not, I just want you to say it.” Satoru is now carrying you over to the chaise lounge in the room, laying you down, sliding up your skirts inch by inch, making you tremble. “Say that you’re mine.”

“I am yours.” You whisper, earning his two fingers sinking easily into your slick cunt, he moans at it, as you cry out weakly, hips arching up for him.

“Feel her, soaked from sucking me. Has anyone got you this wet?” He leans over you, fucking your gummy walls with his fingers, in and out, bringing you to the brink of pleasure so quickly, goosebumps scatter across every inch of your skin. You cling to his open shirt, shaking your head. “Only me, then say it.”

“Only you… and you… have you cum so hard… for anyone?” You demand, yanking him down and glaring, he shakes his head now, blue eyes on fire, touching you as much as those long fingers do.

“Never, no one compares to you. They are nothing. Nothing.” You cry now, as his words overtake you, words you need, words you crave. He’s slamming his lips back down your cheek, your neck, as his elbow bends and he fucks you with his fingers, loud in the manor with the squelching wetness of your cunt.

“I love you, Satoru.” You say between tears, he moans at that, forehead resting on yours, one hand cupping your face as his other presses up, hitting your spot, your back arches and you scream out.

“Beautiful, fucking love you. Love how you feel. Cum on my fingers, slutty Princess, please. Soak them.” He whispers against your lips, and his thumb hits your neglected clit, you shatter. “That’s it, good girl, good girl.”

“Satoru!” You scream now, burying your head against his chest as his fingers ease, you’re spasming around them, gushing arousal everywhere, body on fire with pleasure, so intense you feel like you’re floating. He sucks on his fingers, moaning now, before unlacing your bodice, revealing your breasts, which bounce out for his hungry eyes.

“All mine, every bit of you.” He says, and you descend further into the madness that is Duke Satoru Gojo, when he is suckking on a peak of your breast, looking at you under lowered lashes, mouth latched on tightly as he flicks his tongue, fingers curling up on your spot and hitting again, again, again.

You’re a mess as he’s sliding up your skirts, fingers circling your engorged clitoris now, your hands cling to his broad shoulders as he’s pressing you into the chaise lounge, firm cushions against your back, his hot mouth on your neck, suckling hard, leaving a mark that’ll be there for days. He’s taking you over now, all of you, and you never want him to let go.

Your breathing is erratic, and your eyes are rolling back as his hand works you, you’re so wet his fingers slip, while his teeth are sharp, grazing your skin and bruising, leaving a trail of his marks. “Want to mark you everywhere.”

“Mnh!”

“Everywhere. Your body belongs to me.” He says then, you feel him hard and hot against your thigh, and fuck you’re lost in him, lost in the feeling of his hand, lost in the sound of his moans in your ear, the breath tickling you and just serving to make your desire more and more intense.

Satoru kisses your cheek now, so sweetly, before he heads down to your collarbone, his hand moving faster as it works you so well, his thumb pressing harder, biting the thin skin over your chest, hurting and bruising you instantly. You’re so close, so close to the edge, your toes curling in your delicate slippers, fingers clinging now in his silky hair.

“Cum again for me, Princess, let me feel it, let me hear it, I want it all for myself.” He whispers, and you do, of course you do. Your orgasm hits so hard your hips buck back, getting so overstimulated, mouth wide open in a scream.

As your orgasm subsides, his hand slows, and he kisses you deeply, his tongue dancing with yours, cupping your face. “Satoru, please…”

“Please what, slutty girl?” He hums those words, taking his fingers off you and sucking on them, cheeks hollowing.

“Fuck me. Please.” You’re begging, but you truly do not care, you crave him so badly.

“Fuck you, hmm?” He teases, you pout. “You’re cute.”

“Satoru! I sucked you off so good, you promised.”

“You’re impatient.” Satoru’s stripping you of your dress now, then your undergarments and chemise, even your slippers, leaving you bare for his hungry gaze. “Let me take my time with you.”

You obey, when he’s looking at you like that, when his hands are trailing down your body, every inch, then you gasp as he flips and bends you over, pulling you up on your knees, making you tremble. You’ve not been on your knees like this, though the desk was quite similar, you peer back at him, he’s kneeling on the lounge, head low, huge hands spreading your ass apart.

“Satoru we haven’t… um…”

“I can see all of your pretty cunt like this.” He whispers, now spreading the puffy lips of your pussy, and the softness of his kisses up your thighs turn to something more urgent as he moves up to your inner thigh, and you feel his hot breath against your entrance, making you jerk and him chuckle. “So pretty.”

“Ngh!” You cry out when he kisses the slit of your cunt, his tongue darting out to taste you, making you jolt. His mouth kisses down to your clit, his tongue circling and flicking, making you gasp and whine out. “Toru!”

“That’s it, let me taste you, Princess. Let me taste how much you loved swallowing me.” He whispers, your eyes roll back at how good he feels, at what his fucking words do to you. Now Satoru’s huge hands hold your thighs open as you try to clamp them shut from the intensity.

You're so sensitive from his earlier ministrations you can barely stand his little teasing flicks, each one sends sparks through your body, you’re so weak you damn near fall apart from just a few, then when he’s burying his face into your cunt you’re shattering, back arching, ass pressing against his face.

“Oh, that’s it, arch f’me.”

"S’too much!” You cry out, but he just smiles against you, you feel the upturn of his lips.

“Just getting started, Princess. Let me reward you, you took my cock in that throat so good.” Satoru doesn't relent, no his tongue working you faster, his teeth grazing your sensitive flesh, when he bites down on your clit, the pain and pleasure so fucking blinding you cum right then.

“F-fuck!” You scream out, gushing arousal all down his face, you can hear him drinking you up, hear him slurping you as if he needs every damn drop.

You're on the edge again, and he knows it. He takes your clit into his mouth, sucking hard as his fingers slide into your wetness. You're so close, you can feel it building, and just when you think you can't handle anymore, he slams his fingers into you, curling them just so, and you're falling over the edge again, three of them stretching you beyond your limits.

“Please, please, please!”

“So desperate for my cock, hmm? Needy, slutty girl.” You just whimper, arching your ass out for more.

“Please!”

“Cum once more, I’ll give it to you.” He says softly, teeth nipping an ass cheek as he curls those three fingers, making your pussy gush when the orgasm hits, and you’re shaking violently, pussy pulsing around him. “Oh, you’re so ready.”

“Will you fuck me Satoru!? Or will you keep running your- ah!” Duke Gojo shoves his long cock in you then, curved tip smashing your cervix, making you shatter, cumming all over his cock so quickly, he laughs softly, hands pressing into the dimples of your back.

“Fuck you’re easy.”

“Just… just… fuck me.” Satoru moans then, slamming his cock into you, in this position it’s so deep you can hardly stand it, you’re already drooling when his tall body leans over you, overtaking you, long fingers of one hand wrapping your little throat as he fucks you so deep. “T-Toru…”

“Love that name from your perfect fucking mouth.” Satoru shoves two fingers in your mouth now, two that had been so deep in your cunt, you suck yourself off him, as he fucks into you harder, long, slow, powerful strokes that wreck you.

Satoru raises a knee now, planting a foot on the floor as leverage to fuck your pussy deeper, so deep it hurts, but you crave it, you need it, drooling all over his long fingers as his cock wrecks you. Your walls flutter all around his thick cock, dripping down his length, his balls smacking that overstimulated clit as he wrecks you, stretches you, fills you.

There’s nothing but him, you cannot even fathom that there ever was anything but this, as badly as you want to resent him, to feel hurt, it’s all too good, you with him, you around him, him inside you. And he’s not just inside your pussy, no he’s in you completely, feel him in your stomach, in your throat damn near, stroking your entire body with each thrust.

Your breasts are shaking with each one, jiggling just so, as your ass jiggles when his pelvis smashes against it, and now he removes his fingers, bringing you to your knees, choking your throat tighter. He’s looking right at you as you’re close again, squeezing the oxygen out of your throat, but Satoru has always done that, he’s always taken your fucking breath away.

“Feel s’fucking perfect, perfect pussy, perfect body.” He grips your tit with his other hand, squishing it now before smacking it, you cry out in pleasure. “You like it, me ruining you, don’t you?”

You can’t answer, you just arch up for more, raising and lowering your thighs, sinking your pussy down onto his cock, while his hands explore every inch of you. Your head falls back against his chest, hair splaying softly across it, Satoru should be sore, he’s been hit, but he’s fucking into you without a grunt of pain, only groans of pleasure while your slick pools.

You’re a sticky, sloppy little mess for him, and he relishes in it, quiet chuckles and then soft cries in each of your ears when he presses you back to your knees, pulling your hips up so he can fuck you better, harder, deeper. Impossibly deep, you hear the smacks of his skin while he does, while he relentlessly fucks you, tip dragging against that spongy spot in your walls.

“Fuck look at you.” Satoru smacks your ass cheeks, each one, over and over, marking them with his hand prints, thickening in your cunt now. “This won’t do, I need to see your face when you cum.”

Satoru has you flipped on your back so quickly you’re breathless, he’s laying over you, sweat dripping on his face, his blood dried against his pretty pink lips, eyes mad as they stare at you. He grabs your thigh, sliding it over his broad shoulder, the sole of your foot pressing into his collar bone, your legs are too fucking short for his long body.

“You are mine. Say it, Princess.” He says now, tip brushing your swollen clit, you gasp at it, hands sliding up to cup his face.

“I am yours, my Duke. Yours.” He moans, shoving his cock in your aching little hole again, even slicker and easier entry, his head thrown back, you watch the strong muscles of his throat and shoulders as he works over you, moaning. “You are mine, say it.”

His eyes lock, his expression serious, leaning lower, cock rocking against just that spot, making you tremble, jaw locking in pleasure. “Oh, I am yours, Princess, all fucking yours. I’ll do anything to keep you.”

“Oh… I want to stay…” You blink back your emotion when he lays firm over you, your breasts squished under his firm chest.

“If you did not, I’d chain you up in my dungeon. Keep you.” You scowl, and he grins, taking a breath. “What, I’d still fuck you all the time.”

“Y-you’re…stupid… ah!” Satoru fucks you so deep and hard you can’t tell where he ends and you begin, it’s all too heady and overwhelming, when his eyes lock on yours, and you’re moaning so loud with him.

“Keep your attitude and find out.” You clamp your cunt down now, laughing breathless as he lets out a strangled moan, pulling back. “Slutty brat.”

“Arrogant manwhore. C’mere.” You yank his mouth down to yours, and you kiss so sloppy, tongues entwined as you clutch his white hair, as he rolls his hips and groans into your mouth.

“Where do you want me to cum, Princess? Want me to fill your greedy little cunt up again?” You nod shyly, he smirks, even as his cock wrecks you, this motherfucker just smirks. “Fill your stomach up?”

He presses it now. “Yes, yes, yes.”

Satoru exhales now, pressing your leg up high and pounding your cunt so good, over and over, stretching you to fit him. “Made f’me, made… say it.”

“For you.” You finish weakly, finally he’s pulsing inside you, thickening and pouring all that hot gooey cum that had been in your throat in your cunt instead, he’s crying out as he does, mouth wide open in an O, as you cum just from feeling his hot seed coat your walls, shaking as you grind up against him.

“Feel so good around me, god you’re… I’ve never…” Satoru’s murmuring little nonsensical words in your ear, brushing your hair back as he bites your neck and groans, pumping his cum further and further in your sore cunt, that’s milking him for everything.

“I… I… love you.” You whisper now, breathy and weak, and he exhales, tickling your skin with it, leaning up just a bit and cupping your face, feeling your aftershocks gripping him.

“I will never deserve you, Princess. But guess what?”

“Wh-what?”

“I’ll fuck you so good you forget.” He smirks now, pushing his cum deeper, but your cunt is already making most of his cum drip back down his cock, his balls, down on this fancy chaise lounge.

“Conceited…”

“Can’t even finish your sentence. You love my cock too much.” You snort now, rolling your hips, watching him gasp.

“You love my pussy too much.” You counter.

“Oh I do.” He kisses you again, deeply, over and over, brushing his hands down your skin softly, he exhales now, easing as he studies you. “Does it scare you?”

“What, Satoru? The feelings we share?”

“No… if you’re with child… Do you think I’ll be a terrible father?” He’s emotional, you feel it, radiating off him. You shake your head, swallowing carefully.

“No, not at all. Satoru, if you do not wish to have children yet, we can stop that part, there are things I’ve heard I can take… to not become pregnant.”

He shakes his head, stroking your cheek, still nestled inside you, softer now, your body is wrapped around him. “I’m just terrified. I want to give you anything you wish for, anything at all.”

“But do not go against everything to do so.” You say softly, your hands caressing up and down his strong back. “You need not sacrifice everything for me, because of your guilt.”

“It is not my guilt that craves this.” He presses a hand on your tummy, hot and burning against your slick skin. “It’s something far more primal. But when I have a moment to think, I am still in fear.”

“Then we can stop for now-”

“But do you want children?”

“Yes, but… I can wait. This is new, and we are still young.”

“You sacrificed too much already.” Satoru’s voice is hoarse and emotional when he eases out of you, fluids dripping down between you both.

“I know you will be an amazing father, but I can wait. Do you want to give it time and see if we…”

“Could we?” You nod. “How soon would you know?”

“I will get my monthlies in a few days time, so soon we will know. We can be careful until then. I do not want you to be a father before you’re ready.”

“I just don’t deserve any of you.” Satoru whispers, kissing your forehead now, over and over. “I will be the best father I can be if you are. But I want to become better before I father a child.”

“You already are becoming better.” You smile up at him now, and he sighs, kissing your lips over and over gently, as you daydream about it, about a baby with him, it’s too soon surely, but it make you ache.

The next week

Opera house

“Satoru, stop!” You hiss out a whisper as you both are sitting in a box seat, up high watching the opera below. Satoru’s hand is slipping up your thigh under your skirts as you’re staring into the little binoculars, watching the depiction of Hamlet, your thighs clench with desire as he brushes up and down your skin.

He leans in close, mouth brushing your ear. “Then why are you so hot for me, hmm, Princess?”

His hand slips up higher, making you flush in the dark theater, you feel yourself gushing and he’s not even near you, so much it’s inane. You actually pause just a bit, as your tummy clenches, and you feel some twinge of pain, all while your husband, the Duke Gojo, has his fingers slipping higher and higher. You all had this box practically alone, aside from your parents and Satoru’s, and Suguru and Shoko.

Suguru and Shoko were actually courting now, which made you so happy, though Satoru had been so disturbed by the idea. Eventually he came to, since he no longer has to worry about his friend kissing you of course. They are leaning close, whispering and laughing softly, no one is really paying attention to the quiet movements Satoru is making.

But…

“I must… excuse me.” You whisper, earning a concerned glint in his bright blue eyes, you rush out of the box as you start to feel it, something pouring from you now, and it’s a tell tale sign.

You rush into a room, feeling Satoru’s steps behind you, cursing as you lift up your skirts and see it then, the stain of blood dripping, indicating you were indeed not with child. Satoru and you had been careful all week, as you both truly want to make it work, you want to bring a child into your home when Satoru feels ready. So why then, are you devastated!?

Why are you sobbing now, frantically grabbing several handkerchiefs, pressing them against you as you hunch over, tears pouring down your cheeks. You should be relieved, as this was too soon, Satoru and you were just now finally being good together, open and loving, and you know he was apprehensive, so you should be happy right?

You can’t stop the sobs as Satoru enters the quiet room, looking at you with concern, locking the door behind him when he sees you. His thin white brows go together now, striding in long steps to you, holding you by your shoulders and looking down at you now, realization hitting his face.

“Are you alright?” He asks softly, stormy blue eyes searching your face, eyes that you fall deeper into every moment you breathe. You quietly look down now, where your hand still presses.

“I am not with child. That is good… right?” You whisper, tears hot and burning your eyes as they fall more and more. Satoru sighs now, shaking his head, cupping your face with one of his hands.

“I would have been happy either way. Terrified but happy.” He murmurs, instantly relieving you, the tension in your shoulders dropping as you lean against him, crying on his dark blue vest as he strokes your back. “You wanted to be.”

“I guess I did, I did not truly know until now. Satoru I’m sorry-”

“No, no. Of course you want this, everything about you wants to be a mother, it is I who am afraid, it’s I who should give you it.”

“No, it’s fine, I swear. I just need a moment.” Satoru kisses you then, passionately, over and over, even as you’re holding the cloths against you, he’s tracing his hands down your waist, over the burgundy evening gown you’re in.

“I’m really just enjoying you for now, all of you. Maybe I’m a little selfish for wanting just you longer.” He murmurs against your lips.

“You’re selfish alright, whore of a man.” You tease, sniffling, and he laughs then, nodding a bit.

“Indeed I was planning to finger you right in the theater. You’re so dramatic, ruining my fun.”

“Oh!” You shove at him playfully, the cloths dropping, you panic as he picks them up, pressing them back against you, his lips parted now. “I’m so sorry! It’s so very embarrassing.”

“It is not at all. Let’s go home.”

“But-”

“Home.” His husky voice orders. “You are not merely just upset, you’re clearly uncomfortable, I’ll not have you sitting for another two hours. Now agree or I’m carrying you out and causing a spectacle.”

The thought of him carrying you in front of everyone just makes you smile, and he snorts, rolling his eyes.

“You’ve hurt your ankle, go along with it.” He says now, picking you up in his arms, and just as the intermission is started, Shoko comes up with concern, as does Suguru, and Satoru’s mom.

“What is wrong dear?” Satoru’s mom asks softly.

“She hurt her ankle, Mama. I’m taking her back home.” Satoru’s hands tighten just a bit as your mother walks up now, she has said nothing to you since he told her to leave you be, a blissful reprieve.

Your hands clutch his suit nervously, he feels it, the tension in you, as he holds you close against his chest. She says nothing however, turning her attention elsewhere. Of course she doesn’t care, but it’s better than what would previously occur. Your dad frowns. “Does she need a doctor?”

“No need, I inspected it, she’s just clumsy.” Suguru and Shoko share a look, then raise their brows at you as everyone says their farewells to you both.

“Clumsy hmm?” Suguru suggests, and Shoko laughs behind her hand.

“An excuse for you two to go back to your chambers.” Shoko says, and Satoru feigns a gasp.

“How dare you, scandalous woman! Sugu, get your betrothed under control.”

“Not his betrothed yet.” Shoko nudges Suguru with her shoulder playfully, her brown eyes assessing your face carefully. “Are you alright? You look as if you’ve been crying…” She gets serious then.

“I promise I’m fine. Um… feminine things.” You whisper now, and she nods quickly, Suguru smiles at you both.

“And Satoru’s being a gentleman? Never thought I’d see the day.” Suguru pats you on the head affectionately with a little smile. “All right we will see you two for dinner later this week, yes?”

“I can’t wait!” You say with a grin.

“Take good care of her.” Shoko says, and they head back to the show, Satoru’s nuzzling your cheek as he holds you so close to him, against his chest.

You catch a glimpse then, of Satoru’s old mistress Catherine, and she smiles at you nervously, looking at you both, she’s with a Lord that you cannot remember the name of. Satoru tenses, looking away and walking quickly, but you give her a little wave that she returns, as Satoru carries you to the carriage that is sitting out front of the opera house.

You shiver a bit in the cool night as he brings you in the carriage, sitting you sideways on his lap, making you tense. “Satoru…”

“How can you wave to her?” He asks, his voice hoarse, your eyes catch his in the night as the carriage gently rocks you both, his big hands pressing on your back and tummy as he holds you firm.

“She is a sweet girl.”

He laughs darkly then. “After how I carried on with her? How on earth can you just act so calm.”

You glare now, pulling off him, only for him to yank you back. “Because I will not let our past issues define us.”

“You should hate her. You should hate me!” You glare once more now, continuing to try to pull off him. “Do you remember? That dinner…”

“Yes, of course I do. But I don't want to!” You feel the tears start again, and he gulps, shaking his head, wracking a hand through his hair, making it all disheveled as it gleams in the night.

“You want a baby with someone like me? How!”

“You’re more than your past!”

“Stop being so fucking forgiving, so fucking nice. Will you… be angrier!? Punish me!” He’s shaking you gently, you see it then, the two streaks on his cheeks. “I hate me so much right now, seeing her. I could almost forget how horrible I was, the things I did, things you don’t even know.”

Your chest heaves with your emotions, taking you over. “I don’t need to know more than I do. What, Satoru, positions you two were in!? I care not, we were not in love with each other then. We are now.”

“I can’t forgive myself yet. Not for those cruel words, not for flaunting her around and saying you were adequate when you were so beautiful.” You cup his face now, struggling to control the sobs that are escaping, as you remember the pain. “Do not comfort me, damned brat.”

“You comforted me when my former lover punched you. Satoru we are both not perfect, fuck you’re far from it.”

“You have one lover, I can’t escape all of mine.” He leans his head back against the carriage seat, you try once more to pull away, earning his icy glare. “Stop trying to move, brat.”

“Your brooding is annoying.” He laughs then, even through his emotion, you smile tremulously. “You’re feeling so sorry for yourself.”

“No, sorry for you.” His hands yank at your hair, bobby pins falling every which way, making it bounce out of its coif, as his lips are barely against yours, you feel his every breath, shifting against him now. “You saw us, I remember.”

“I did.” You whisper back, and he lets out a breath, clinging to you, hand enwrapped in your hair, your own gloved hands cling to him.

“Even then, you were all I could think of, imagining your perfect body, your perfect pussy, how your face would look as I pleased you. Fuck I wanted you even then, and I never told you. I told you lies.” He presses his lips against yours, you’re thrown even further against him as the carriage jostles on a patch of dirt outside, soon you’re hearing the pattering of light rain.

It’s just you and Satoru, a man who did those things, they still hurt you, but you’re trying to move past it, but you see it now, it tortures him more than it tortures you, the pain of hurting you, of hurting someone he loves. You watch the toll it’s taking when he pulls back, caressing your face gently with long fingers.

“You wanted me then?” You ask, and he laughs without humor, nodding, pressing his lips against each cheek, sticky from your drying tears.

“I wanted you then, but I didn’t deserve you, I still don’t. I don’t deserve you being so kind, so sweet to me. I don’t deserve to look at your pretty face every morning, as if I’m in some goddamn dream.”

“I’ll decide what you deserve. I want you Satoru, I chose you.” He rests his head against your collarbone now.

“There will be more obstacles, more women. More… problems. I am not worth-”

“You’re worth everything to me. Now shut your mouth.” He glares, earning your grin now.

“Excuse me?”

“Shut your bloody mouth. Whiny man.” His hands press deep on your waist, and you’re giggling through your tears.

“You insolent brat. If not on your monthlies I’d beat your backside.” You smile now, snuggling against him, feeling desire hot and heavy.

“If not for them I’d love to be punished. I’m afraid I’m still very…”

“Slutty.” He finishes, with a grin finally, you scoff, shaking your head. “You want to be fucked even now, don’t you?”

“N-no! That would be scandalous. I could always please you though.” You suggest, hand trailing down his abdomen, as the carriage comes to a stop, and now you’re both kissing, tongues entwining, just the thought of pleasing him makes you undeniably sensitive, throbbing even.

Satoru has you inside and undressing you before you can think, inside his bed chambers now, you’re blushing then, shaking your head. “You can’t see me right now…”

“Hush, wife.” Satoru lays you down on the bed, on your back, naked now, caressing your bare breasts as he kisses down your neck. You gasp as his thumbs brush over a nipple, bringing it taut.

“Satoru, what are you thinking?”

“Thinking my wife is a wanton little brat, who wants my cock even now.” His whisper just edges you on, and you’re arching your back.

🩸Period Scene Begins- scroll down if you don't like🩸

“Do not tease me so! Let me just suck you off- Mmm!” Satoru’s kissing down your neck, sliding his jacket off as he does, you hastily unbutton his dress shirt, looking at him nervously, curiously, flush decorating your cheeks and neck, while he peppers you with kisses all over your breasts, your collarbone, your neck, his hands slipping down your thighs.

“Do you want me, Princess?” He asks huskily, lidded gaze when he pulls back, undoing his trousers, and you bite your lip nervously, sitting up, only for him to press you back down. “Not sucking me, do you want me inside you?”

“That’s… not what is done and madness… and…” Satoru has slid a towel from his nightstand now, lifting your ass and propping it right under you, smirking down as he leans up on his arms, you gasp when you feel his mushroomed tip kissing your soaking wet entrance. “Mmm!”

“She’s so hot for me, fuck.” He groans now, leaning on one elbow, putting your leg over his hip, your heel pressing into the strong muscles of his lower back. “Do you want me to fuck you, yes or no Princess?”

“But I’m…” You look down, squeaking, seeing the bright red blood on his cock, on your inner thighs. “I…” You cling to his bare skin, arching up now, eyes locking, watching his cheeks dust pink with desire for you. “I want you.”

He moans now, kissing, pressing into you, without any play it would hurt but you’re so wet with all the blood and desire he sinks in, gasping as he fills you, the warm liquid acting as lubricant, coating Satoru’s cock in red. He pulls back and you look at it, but his eyes just watch your face, caressing it, shoving his cock back inside you, your back arches.

“You’re so tight… holy…” He’s slipping further inside you as it starts to feel so good, you can’t even be embarrassed, by the blood mixing with his precum dripping on this towel, not when it feels so good. Not when the tension in your tummy is easing with every stroke, and he’s kissing you, crying out into your lips.

You cry out back, clinging to him as he’s working his cock inside your tight entrance, she’s greedy and hungry for more of him, and when his tip starts hitting your cervix, you fall apart, gushing cum all over him, mixing with the bright red. His tongue devours your mouth as he fucks into you so slow, so good, deep strokes, fucking you through your orgasm and pushing into another.

“Satoru!” You cry out, desperately, your hands slipping down to his strong muscles of his back to grip his ass, sinking him in more and more. “It feels so good, oh my-ah!”

His eyes are dilated now, as he’s fucking into you, slamming your cervix, you hear the squishing sounds as the blood flows, pooling between you both, but he doesn’t care at all, and neither do you. You can’t remember even hurting now, your tummy has relaxed so much, being filled with him. He eases back on his knees, hands on your hips, watching his bulge move your tummy.

You watch with him, seeing the creamy ring at the base of his cock mix with you, watching Satoru’s perfect abdomen coated with light trickles of your blood, his strong hand presses your tummy now, giving you so much pressure you scream out.

“Look at me inside you. Filling you.” Satoru’s eyes are mad now, sweat dripping down his perfect chin as he presses your thigh up high, feeling his cock deep in your pelvis.

“It’s s’good… th-thank you…” You whisper, eyes rolling back, as he grabs your waist, bringing your cunt down harder on his length.

“I don’t want you to be sad. I want… you… cumming…” He’s huffing now, tip dragging on that spot, and you do just that, screaming out your pleasure, as he fucks you harder, faster, overtaking your every sense.

“L-love you… sorry I… was… wish you…” You’re nonsensical, he’s tensing a bit, but he nods now, as he works over you, pumping even deeper, face resting an inch from yours.

“No saying sorry. Oh my God I wanna fill you up with me.” He whispers, and you crave it, desire it more than anything.

“Fill me then.” You beg now. “Please, Toru, please…”

He slams his lips on yours, pumping your pussy full of him, and you’re so full, with his cum, with your arousal, the blood dripping and mixing, you’re a trembling mess as he does, as you feel him release in you after a week of not. “God it feels so good, fuck you feel so… fuck I love this…”

Satoru’s crying out now, clinging to your body so tightly you can barely breathe, and you’re trembling from aftershocks, dizzy and weak, as you gently brush his shoulders with your hands. He leans up, eyes dark now, tracing the line of your jaw with his fingertips. You both stare at each other carefully.

“I’m terrified, but I want it. Want you round with me.” He murmurs, only making your pussy throb again, earning his hiss, as he pushes in once more. “You’re maddening, intoxicating, like some drug.”

“Me a drug!? You are the drug.” You kiss him deeply, over and over, and he smiles now as he looks at you. “What is it?”

“You’re so pretty like this. All cock drunk.” You glare and he chuckles. “It’s quite fetching on you, slutty bride.”

“Oh you’re so annoying! And perverted!”

“Says the woman with cum and blood dripping down her thighs.” His hushed words make you tremble, as he eases out finally, and you squeak, earning his laugh. “It does not bother me, Princess.”

“Are you sure?” You ask softly, touching your tummy. “My cramps are all but gone somehow.”

“They are?” You nod shyly. “Then we must always do it whenever you cramp, to help, you know.”

“Oh my… as if you couldn’t get freakier. Slutty Duke.” He snorts, cleaning up your mess now, but it’s truly too much of a mess. “I’m afraid I need to bathe…”

“I’ll have them draw a bath for us.”

🩸Period scene OVER 🩸

Soon you’re in Satoru’s arms, in the scalding hot water, his hands are dripping wet as they slip up and down your skin, kissing your neck gently, making you laugh as it tickles. You feel such a bliss, even knowing you’re not with child yet, there is much time and you are enjoying him far, far too much. He’s humming something softly, making you a little curious.

“What’s that song?” You ask.

“Something I’m composing. About a demonic little succubus.”

“Oh, I’m jealous!”

“Mmm, you know it’s you. No one else would make me compose a song.” Satoru’s hands rest on your tummy gently. “You addle my mind.”

“You have fucked my mind away I’m afraid.” He snorts in laughter, burying his head against your neck, his soaking white hair dripping against your cheek. “It’s fine if I’m not with child for a while, I’m sorry I reacted like that. I don’t want to pressure you into this.”

“There’s no pressure, I’ll second guess myself until it happens, and when it happens, I’ll worry I’m not enough.” You exhale, turning and looking up at him, reaching behind you to cup his face.

“You are enough. I promise.” Satoru moans softly, kissing you over and over.

“We could have had this, from the beginning, and not have had… others interfere with it. It’s all my fault.” You cannot find the proper words to soothe him, you just kiss him again.

“Just enjoy the moment.” He nods then, hand taking your face over, shoving his tongue deeper and deeper into your mouth, more passionate with every stroke.

“He could have never handled you. Too freaky.” He says against your lips, wiggling his brows.

“Me!?”

“Yes you. Imagine, he’d probably run in fright.”

“Oh you’re ridiculous, it was your idea!”

“Mmm, and I wanna go again.” He nips your shoulder. “I can never, ever get enough of you, I swear.”

“I cannot either, Toru.”

Three days Later

The Royal Palace

“I can’t believe we’re meeting the King!” You whisper to Satoru now, and he just smiles at you, as you all wait in the decadent hall to be introduced. King Sukuna had just taken over for his twin brother who had passed away, and not much was known about him yet.

“I hear he’s a dick.” Satoru mentions, you laugh but then quickly quiet as others around you both stare at you. “So improper.”

“Oh hush, you! I can’t believe he’s granting us an audience.”

“I’m a Duke, you’re a Duchess, of course he is. Now relax, or I’ll get very jealous, you so excited for another.” You glare up at him, and he’s grinning so big, it warms your heart, it warms everything, to see him so happy, so lit up.

You adore him so much.

It’s quiet now as the King walks in, he’s joined by his younger sister, Princess Uraume, who has short white hair and is lovely in an ethereal sort of way that’s entrancing. King Sukuna himself is tall and broad, with a giant smirk and shocking light pink hair. He’s so big it’s intimidating, his sister is so tiny next to him, but then you notice who is with her, as a lady-in-waiting.

Your heart stops right in your chest, Satoru’s hand grips you so tightly you can scarcely breathe, as King Sukuna looks at you, up and down, taking his time with each inch, making you almost forget who is with his sister. She looks at you, her eyes, your eyes almost, in shock as she meets your gaze.

It’s like looking in a goddamn mirror.

“Duchess, it’s an honor to drink in your beauty, as beautiful as everyone has said across the land.” King Sukuna says, and you rip your eyes off her, as she and Satoru glare at each other. King Sukuna kisses the back of your hand, breath hot on your skin, looking up at you with dark brown eyes, almost crimson.

“Your Grace, it is my honor.” You manage to whisper back, curtseying low over his hand, earning his chuckle.

“No need for such formalities.” He does not let go of your hand, lewdly staring at you with a brow raised, then looking at Satoru, who’s frozen like a statue in shock, as he can’t rip his angry gaze off the woman who looks just like you. “Ah, the resemblance is uncanny, is it not? There must be a relation?”

“There must be. Hello there.” You say to her now, and she smirks, cruelly in fact, assessing you.

“Adelia. Hello your Grace.” She says, her voice is nothing like yours, it’s cold, it’s calculated, as is her entire demeanor.

“And Princess Uraume, hello.” You curtsey to her, she nods just a bit, staring at you curiously as well.

“Greetings, Duchess.” She says softly, and you finally look at Satoru, who squeezes the glass in his hand so hard it shatters, making the room go quiet.

Your heart is breaking as you watch him, as you feel his tension, and suddenly it’s as if everything could go wrong, your short found happiness. What if he still loves her!? What if he’ll hate you again!? What if…

What if…

Suddenly it’s as if you cannot breathe, you feel it, overtaking your chest, tightening your throat, and King Sukuna holds you carefully, concern in his formerly amused gaze as he looks at your face.

You can’t breathe.

A/N: This chap was a fkn DOOZY, Say hi to King Sukuna and bitch ass Adelia lol <3 Did you think we were done w/this story yet!? No lol. Please leave a comment if you enjoyed, or a reblog, they help so much. Ty for reading this one!!!!

Taglist: @kalopsia-flaneur @bunheadusa @7thsthings @disilluzions  @antisocialinlw @Sukunassfinger @lelsforlino @heeknow @muvasuperior @prince-wyiilder @lavender-hvze @ssetsuka  @labelt-san  @sadmonke @philiatothephobia @ambiguouslady42 @stromynight @dreamygirli3 @jazlenekasi @victoriaaaa00 @wuvnada @valleydoli @nanasukii28 @sw3etnena @dark-agate @tamaki-simp @yuuuumii @givluv2tyy @airandyeah @chiyokoemilia @webshooterrr9 @miizuzu @thikcems @erensblackwife @murayamayoshiki-lovergurl @blue-musingss @huuuhwhaat @makingtimemine @saccharinesatoru @sunnyviewsblog

Part Thirteen

[allpiesforourown]

I have such intense feelings for your bingyuan roommate au, it’s unreal. Binghe would be the BIGGEST green tea bitch/pick me girl but only towards sy, no one else. encountering lbh in the wild first and then experiencing him next to sy would be a fever dream of epic proportions. actual dozens of women would want to behead him and rip out his guts. bc lbh would ditch them on their birthday, an actual medical emergency, or anything critical at all just bc sy vaguely implied he was hungry (lbh now HAS to cook for him, it is not a want, it is a NEED)

And sy would be worse then evvvver, lol. “That’s my little didi binghe, he’s so sweet and sensitive, girls are always breaking his heart :((( If I were his girlfriend I’d get married to him next week and bounce on him silly style. Too bad no one will ever appreciate binghe like I do :(((((” and it is only after MANY of those thoughts that he realizes that he might not feel all that brotherly towards lbh

on a hornier note, I’m at a toss up between thinking that lbh would bring his hookups/girlfriends back to his and sy’s home and fucking them there (bc in lbh’s mind he can’t cum right without the reminder of his gege… and what if gege walked in 🤤… maybe lbh can get him to join…) or him absolutely refusing to let any of them so much as glance at his gege (no one should look at sy except him)

EXACTLY EXACTLY EXACTLY you get it anon.

It's literally like

Woman: let's have a threesome with your friend

Binghe: the idea sounds so appealing but I don't want some stranger getting his hands on him! I don't want to share him with someone who doesn't show him the love he needs. I'm the only one who knows him well enough to be in a threesome with shen yuan

Woman: thats sex. You're just describing regular two people sex. You want to fuck your best friend.

In my head for this au I imagine them as long time friends.. shen yuan found binghe getting bullied at a park or something when they were kids and told his bullies to fuck off. Then he listened to binghe cry about how he's so worried about his sick mom being overworked and begged his parents to hire binghes mom. With way better pay, hours, and work environment, her health improved a lot and she's good friends with shen yuans parents.

Binghe tells himself he acts like shen yuans guard dog because he'll always be grateful for what he's done for his family, but really, he fell in love with his Yuan ge at first sight the second he saw a boy standing up for him instead of ignoring his bullying.

Someone: say something nice about your best friend

Binghe: oh I have so much to say! He's so sweet and intelligent and adorably nerdy ! He saved me and my mom and-

Someone: say something nice about your girlfriend

Binghe: um..... uh ...... well.... sometimes she... hmm......

The poor women he dates. They'd go through SO much suffering trying to "fix" him and then when they finally give up after going through hell itself, they see bingge and shen yuan get together and suddenly the most negligent terrible boyfriend in the world is buying flowers and posting corny pictures on Instagram and proposing a few months into the relationship.

Shen yuan: I can't believe I managed to bag someone as handsome beautiful and loving as binghe. He wakes up at 6am every morning to get started on breakfast so he can feed me in bed. He's so attentive I worry I'm taking advantage of him. How did he get broken up with so often? No one appreciates people like binghe

Everyone else binghe has ever dated: I told him I got stabbed and he left me on read

[a-hazbin-reader]

OK ANOTHER IDEA

OK SO WE KNOW THAT ALASTOR IS A MAMAS BOY AND HAS AN AMAZING RELATIONSHIP WITH HER

SO WHAT IF ALASTOR HAD A FEM S/O BUT SHE HAS A TERRIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH HER MOM, ITS JUST SO EMOTIONALLY TOXIC (especially with reader being an older sibling)

reader never tells him though because alastors relationship with his mom is good and she doesn’t wanna make him feel bad whenever he talks about her and one day readers mom comes to the hotel and reader DREADS it and becomes snappy but readers mom wins everyone over (of course alastor too). So when reader explains that she doesn’t want her mom around alastor can’t understand why and reader feels betrayed its only later when readers mom shows her true colors towards reader. And reader of course bites back (or at least tries too)

So basically angst to fluff and SORRY IF THATS SO MUCH😭😭

👀 Mommy issues??? 👀

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Emotionally Abusive mother, Reader suffering, Reader gets grabbed a few times, Ambiguous ending for mama

Description: ☝️⬆️

When it comes to mothers, it's safe to say you and Alastor had very different experiences

His mother was full of warmth and kindness towards him, doing her best to build him up into a great man

She loved him greatly and it shows whenever he talks about her

But your mother?? Your mother saw you as fucking competition and always found ways to put you down, to make herself better than you

Well maybe she should be the one who was cooking the meals, getting your younger siblings off to school on time or making sure everyone had clean clothes

Just the thought of her made your stomach flip and your legs shake

She would put you down all your life while claiming it was so that you could be a great woman just like her, but not too great, you have to remember who the better woman is

Well now you're both in hell so-

You put as much distance between her and yourself as you could, living your afterlife without her influence

You even got yourself a handsome powerful overlord boyfriend and new friends to share your life with

Even though you're supposed to be in hell, you couldn't be happier

At least you were until your mother showed up at the hotel, her face full of faux worry and tears

"Oh my precious girl! This is where you've been hiding? I was so worried!!"

Before Charlie can even shut the door, your mother has already shoved her way inside and literally dug her claws into you, hugging you

It's all you can do not to throw up, smothered by her familiar scent and grip, hearing her voice again after all this time

"Now let Mommy take a look at you-oh!!! And here I was worried that you were starving! Good to know you've put some weight on those bones!"

And it's already starting-

And now she's crying and rocking you in her arms, cooing about how much she's missed you and how she's never letting you go again

Charlie and the others are just staring at the two of you, completely enraptured by your mother, like everyone always is

She loved being the center of attention

When you finally come to your senses you push her away and create some distance, disturbed by the worried looks everyone is giving her

"Mom, why are you here?"

Oh don't everyone look at you like you're the bad guy!! She's the one who's only here because she wants something!!

"Maybe I wouldn't have to come track you down if you would just visit your poor mother every once in a while...she never even calls me, you know!"

And now she's crying again, Charlie immediately going to comfort her while Vaggie gives you a dirty look

Fucking mommy issues much? Don't fall for this crap

"I don't want to visit you, so just leave-"

"Well now, who is this~?"

Alastor! Yes! He can make her leave! You turn to give your boyfriend a pleading look but your mother catches his attention first

"Oh don't worry about who I am.. just a poor lonely mother who came to see her daughter...but I guess I'll show myself out.."

Alastor doesn't have to guess who she's talking about, even in death you always looked like your mother

His smile gets surprisingly warm and soft, taking your mother's hand in his own in a disgusting display of affection that used to only be for you

"You're Y/N's mother? My my, I should've guessed! You must have so many stories of her from her life! I simply must insist that you say."

ALASTOR NO

You feel sick but nobody notices, your mother already soaking up their attention and winning their hearts

So you turn and leave the hotel, unable to stand being in her presence any longer, you don't miss the smug look she gives you on your way out

You spend all day trying to avoid going back to the hotel until you're sure your mother is gone

You're more than disappointed to find her drinking tea with Alastor, the two of them laughing, her placing her hand on top of his

She always used to try and go after your boyfriends and that hasn't changed either

She hasn't changed

"Oh darling~! We hadn't realized you left! Alastor and I were simply having a moment~"

Alastor lights up when he sees you, only to be visibly confused by your troubled expression

"Y/N! Your mother was just telling me about her life before you! She was quite a wildcard back then!"

Your mother is practically drooling over him, rubbing his hand and winking

"I'm still wild if you ever care to find out!"

You've had it

You tug your mother's hand off of Alastor, forcing her to stand up and look you in the eyes

"You need to leave! Right now!"

And here come the waterworks again

"Y/N..! Darling, what did I do wrong? I'm your mother please don't throw me out like this!"

You just start pushing her towards the door and you slam it shut behind her, sighing in relief

That is until you look at Alastor's face, his smile seeming strained

"Y/N! You can't just throw her out like that, not only is that bad manners but that's no way to treat the woman who raised you!"

Raised you? You raised yourself!!

"Alastor, you don't know what you're talking about so please just stay out of it. You don't know what she's like-"

You're trying to stay calm-

"She's your mother, it's not like she's some evil creature-"

"SHE'S IN HELL OF COURSE SHE'S EVIL-"

"So are you and I, my dear."

You try to put your foot down, tell him that you don't want her here but he's already opening the door for her and letting her back in

She looks so pleased with herself

He invites her to stay the night because of course he does, he would do it for his own mother so why not yours

You try not to give her the satisfaction of seeing you cry but your eyes are already hot and watery

"I-I'm going to bed..!"

Alastor calls for you, trying to resolve things then and there but the only response he gets is your door slamming shut

He goes to go after you but your mother stops him with a gentle hand to the shoulder

"Now now...let her cool off for a bit then I'll go make sure she's alright, a mother always knows how to cheer up her child~"

It feels like you spend hours crying in your bed, feeling so hurt that Alastor took her side over yours

Your mom isn't like his, she doesn't nurture, she just takes from you and bullies you

Later, just when you've about cried yourself to sleep, you hear the bedroom door open

"Alastor..?"

"Not a chance, pet."

Now what does she want

"Why are you even here?"

Suddenly she pounces on you, grabbing your wrists tightly, eyes wild with fury she must've been containing this whole time

You don't even know why she's so mad at you, you haven't seen her in years-

"You think you're better than me now, is that it? Now that you're on your own, living in some fancy hotel, got some powerful boytoy, hiding behind hell's princess?"

As a kid, she seemed so strong but now you easily rip out of her grasp and manage to create some distance between you two

"I'm not hiding behind anyone! I'm just trying to get away from you!"

"Oh no no no, that's not how this works! I am your mother! If I have to be miserable and live in filth then so do you!"

"Why are you even here!?"

"Because it's not fair! I deserve to be here! Not some ungrateful little bitch who just happened to fall out of me!"

She lunges at you and you try to dodge her but she manages to grab you by your hair, yanking you back

You're about to start swinging when Alastor is suddenly there, watching the two of you in bewilderment

Then that bewilderment melts away into understanding, then anger

The radio sounds in the room are suddenly deafening, your mother letting go of you so she can cover her ears

You take the chance to kick her away, watching as she tumbles and loses consciousness from the impact

Alastor kneels beside you but you flinch away from him, still feeling hurt

"Y/N...I'm so sorry..." He does look properly ashamed, his smile a little watery

"Why didn't you just tell me that she was like this..?"

How could you even begin to start?? That you didn't want to somehow sour his opinion of mothers by telling him about your own?

That you didn't want him to feel guilty for having a mother who loved him while you grew up having to be a mother to your siblings because your own mom had none to give??

It's just word vomit at this point, but Alastor simply gathers you into his arms, tutting as he checks your scalp and fixes your hair

When he gets to your wrists where your mother grabbed than his smile turns positively venomous, giving your mother a deadly look

"What do you want me to do with her? Anything you ask..."

You're a little irritated that he brought her up, having been too relaxed by the feeling of his lips against your palm

"I just want her out of here..."

And that's all it takes, Alastor calls for Niffty and has her take out the trash, her scuttling out gleefully while dragging your mother

Niffty doesn't even care, she's just happy to have a new toy

You didn't realize how stressed out you were until it was just the two of you, Alastor rubbing your back soothingly

You don't know when you fall asleep but when you wake up Alastor is kissing the side of your face, looking as apologetic as he can be

You manage to convince him to apologize in morning snuggles and by the time you two come downstairs everyone else is awake

"Where is Y/N's mom?"

Not Niffty giggling and running out of the room

Alastor simply shakes his head and wraps an arm around your waist to hold you closer

"She is gone and won't ever be visiting again, I would like to ask that nobody brings her up again~"

Something about the way he says it manages to shut everyone up

Alastor takes you out to eat your favorite breakfast and spends the day spoiling you

He doesn't bring up the events of last night until the two of you are in bed, entangled in each other's arms

"You didn't ruin my opinion of mothers, you know."

"I didn't?"

"No, in fact, it sounds like you were quite the mother back in your day~"

Not his hand rubbing your belly

OH MAMA THIS ONE TOOK ALL DAY! I hope you liked it!!

[tobesolonely]

untitled angsty but then sweet piece...

hello guys!! it's been like over a year lol. I was going through my google doc and found this and I feel like I never posted it? so now I am posting it. maybe this can be a part 1 but also we know I'm great at starting multipart stories and not finishing them so lets see

૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა

warnings: none (~1.2k words)

✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿

“You're just gonna ignore me then, babe?”

Y/N continues silently puttering around in the kitchen, going out of her way to make sure her back remained turned on Harry. There weren't many ways to get under his skin, but throughout her years of being with him she learned that being on the receiving end of the silent treatment usually made him fold pretty quickly. She was annoyed with her husband and the fact that he seemed clueless as to why made her even more upset.  

“I take your silence as a yes?” 

More puttering. More re-wiping the already clean counters. Starting the tea kettle. Washing her hands. Anything to not acknowledge Harry, really.

“I can’t make it better if you don't tell me why you're so upset, love,” he takes a tentative step toward her. “I know we've been together for ages but I still can't read your mind. Think ‘m gettin’ real close, though.”

This is said jokingly, and she knows her husband is just trying to dissipate the tension that's thick in their kitchen, making the spacious room seem impossibly small. She doesn't acknowledge his joke, doesn't crack a smile because that would give him too much satisfaction. Nothing made Harry cockier than being the reason for Y/N’s laugh, a sound so sweet she’s pretty sure he’d forbid everyone on the planet except him from listening to it because he wanted it all to himself. He always told her it was music to his ears.

The fact that he doesn't even know what he did is what finally causes her to break, muttering about how fucking ridiculous he is under her breath. It's not lost on Harry. 

“Now you've moved on from ignoring me to cursing at me?” he sounds more curious than upset, taking another step toward her. She backs away, defensively crossing her arms over her chest and she doesn't miss the way Harry’s brow furrows at the action. “Can y’please tell me what I did, Y/N? Please?” When she looks down at the ground, ignoring his please, he begs some more. He’s not above groveling, really. 

“Please, angel? Lemme fix it,” his eyes are wide and wild as he wildly searches hers for some clue as to what he did wrong. “Tell me-”

“Am I always just gonna come second with you?” 

She can almost see the wheels in her husband’s head turning, knows he's choosing his words carefully before he speaks so as not to upset her any further. 

“Okay, love,” he runs a ringer hand through his hair. “Can you be a little bit more specific?”

“We had plans this afternoon, Harry. We were gonna try that new café that just opened. I was looking forward to it,” she doesn't care if this makes her sound selfish and childish. “I know you were working and I know you how much you love to do that, but sometimes I feel like-”

“Don’t even finish that thought,”  Harry cuts her off and his tone is sharp, calloused. “That’s not true.”

“You know, at first I was worried something happened when you didn't show,” Y/N continues like she didn't hear him. “But then I realized nope, you probably just forgot or couldn't get out of another meeting. Just like always.”

A look of sadness flashes across Harry’s face, which quickly transforms to indignant anger. “Don't throw this in my face, Y/N. You know how much I hate that.” 

“So I’m supposed to be mindful of the things you hate, but you can't be mindful of the things I hate?”

“You don't get it,” he mumbles under his breath, growing increasingly done with the conversation the longer it drags on. “You're not in the industry. I can't just always leave-” 

“Then blame it on me! Make me the bad guy, Harry,” she finally turns all the way around to face him completely. “The people you work with get to see you more than I do…the fans…” Y/N trails off, letting her unfinished thoughts hang limply in the air. 

It’s quiet between the couple for no more than thirty seconds, but it feels like a lifetime. Harry breaks it first - he always does. He inhaled a deep shaky breath, trying to call forward the breathing techniques his therapist taught him to use in high-stress situations. Right now counts as a high-stress situation. 

“You’re right, angel,” the pet name slips off his tongue easily which comforts Y/N. Harry’s not as upset as she thought he was. He’s still her Harry. “That’s not fair of me, is it?”

All Y/N can do is shake her head, lower lip jutted out. She knows if she tries speaking she’ll start crying, and she doesn't want to cry. All she wants is for Harry to understand. Harry however, knows her too well. He knows the look she gets on her face when she's trying really hard not to cry and he knows she goes silent because she doesn't trust her voice not to come out shakey. He decides to continue talking.

“I should've called you and let you know I’d be late- or told you we needed to reschedule. I’m sorry I left you hanging, darling.” He pauses, selecting his next words very wisely. Harry knows his wife is sensitive. The last thing he wants is for her to think he's blaming her for anything. “...but it seems like this is about more than me missing our lunch. Which, again, I'm very sorry about. I'm taking you wherever you want for dinner tonight and I'll make you dessert when we get home. Let's talk more about this though, yeah?”

“You also have to be in charge of picking up after Hershey for a month,” Y/N responds with a small smile on her face. Hershey was the couple’s tiny brown poodle who was the cutest puppy in the world. “Thank you.”

“Mmm,” Harry hums, knowing his wife was trying to keep the conversation lighthearted since she hated confrontation. Since being with Harry her communication skills have improved tremendously since he was so good at it and wanted to talk about everything, but healthy communication clearly still didn't come as easily to her. “Talk to me, angel. What’s this about?”

Harry’s in front of her now, arms wrapped limply around her waist. He walks her backward until the small of her back hits the counter then he tells her to, “jump” so he can lift her onto the counter. Once she's situated he settles himself in between her legs and places his arms back on their place on her waist. Harry looks intently into Y/N’s eyes and she knows she won’t be leaving that spot until she tells him what's bothering her, so she just says it.

“I want a baby.” 

Harry raises his eyebrows in quick surprise before breaking out in a wide grin- the kind that causes his nose to scrunch up and wrinkles to form around his eyes. 

“You want a baby? W’ me?”

Y/N doesn’t return his smile, which quickly makes Harry’s turn into a frown.

“Why don’t you look happy?”

Y/N sighs, her eyes avoiding Harry’s. He gently places his index finger under her chin and pushes it up, forcing her to look into his eyes. He’s desperately searching his wife’s eyes, trying to figure out why she isn’t more excited about coming to this big decision. Harry has been ready for years of course, but he never wanted her to feel pressured.

“You’re never here, Harry. I don’t want to feel like a single mom.” Y/N looks down again and Harry doesn’t lift her chin back up this time. In fact, he doesn’t say anything. It’s silent for what feels like a couple minutes but is actually maybe only twenty seconds, the faucet leaking being the only sound heard throughout the whole house.

“Y/N…love,” Harry inhales a shaky breath, removing one of his hands from her hip to run his fingers through his curls. “I never want to make you feel like you’re alone. Not just with this, but…with anything.” Harry gently knuckles away a stray tear falling down Y/N’s cheek. 

“I know you don’t mean to make me feel this way, H. I guess it’s just what I signed up for when I married a popstar, yeah?” Harry can tell Y/N is trying to lighten the mood, but he doesn’t like that he’s the reason for he feeling this way.

“You didn’t “sign up” for anything, love. I’m your husband and you’re my wife and we’re supposed to be there for each other through it all, good and bad.” Y/N opens her mouth to say something but Harry gently pinches her hip, muttering for her to let him finish. “I want a baby with you. I want everything with you, Y/N. I want to be here for everything. I’m going to be better about being here.”

“H…I love you and I know you’ll try, but you’ve said this before-”

“I’ll take a break, babe. Cancel everything,” Harry’s talking faster now, excitement about his plan evident in his voice. “We’ll focus on ourselves and start our family. Go out of the country and leave my bloody phone here, if you’d like.” Y/N giggles at that, which makes Harry give her a big, dimpled grin.

“Will it be okay? With Jeff and everyone?” Although Y/N’s sure people on Harry’s team won’t be happy with his sudden change in plans, she can’t deny how charming the idea sounds. She could already picture them at their favorite villa in Italy, the one Harry purchased as a wedding gift to her and where they spent their unforgettable honeymoon. In all honesty, she’s surprised they didn’t get a baby out of that trip.

“Let me worry about that. You just worry about buying yourself some new bikinis, yeah?” Harry places a lingering kiss to Y/N’s jawbone. “Perhaps a few things for me to rip off you too, hmm?”

✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿

hooray for happy endings :')