#Hartleys Jelly

[dinnerposting42]

I madr linch today!!! :)

[inafieldofdaisies]

My ship in 5 minutes | Calahan x Mary May | Base template source || Jacob x Mercedes

"Maybe home is nothing but two arms holding you tight when you’re at your worst."

[f1nneas]

Do you guys think eating jelly is what eating a period blood clot feels like

[formulapisces]

f5 crew wassup 😭😭 I am cold and tired and ready for some answers

🦇(freeze gone. defrosted?)

i’m not so patiently waiting for this ferrari/merc dsq thingy

my freeze is also gone! thawed?

[holycolor]

Hartleys Jolly Jelly Christmas Stollen Trifle

[gorogues]

Fictober 2023

Prompt number #30 Fanfiction Fandom: Flash Rogues Rating: G – General audiences Warnings: None. Notes: This diverges from canon somewhat, and is very stupid.

Day Thirty: “Are you with me?”

“This time we’re gonna get him first! Are you with me?” “Like bacon with eggs! Like toast with jelly! Like bagels with lox! Like cheese with burger! Like—” “Uh, Piper?” “Yeah, Tricks?” “Do we need to stop and get you something to eat first?”

The blatt tooted sadly, bereft without its special human.  How could the musician have left it behind?  Surely that was an error in need of rectifying, so it redoubled its efforts to break out of the room it’d been locked in.

It rammed its flag against the door a few more times, and tooted in triumph when the door came loose on its hinges.  The blatt needed to crouch down to get through the doorway, but happily began bouncing through the hall in search of its human.

“Who the hell is making that racket?!” demanded an irascible neighbour, peeking out to check if the Pied Piper was up to no good again.  Only to see…a gigantic eighth note bounding towards the staircase.

“You young hooligan, I’m callin’ the cops!” he shouted, ducking back into his apartment.  “Dressing up in polka dots and tights, and dressing like music notes…kids these days, no damn respect.”

The blatt hopped down the stairs and squeezed out the front door, discovering there was a whole outdoor world it’d never been aware of.  There were lots of people!  And cars!  And other sources of sound!  But its human was nowhere to be seen, so it began following his trail via the slight harmonic frequencies he’d left behind in his footsteps.  It could ‘hear’ where he’d been and where he was now, and its flag perked up with joy.

**

“These eggs are so good, you should try some,” Hartley said cheerfully as James tapped his fingers and nibbled on a bagel with obvious impatience.

“We’ve really gotta get moving, Hart.  The others are waiting for us.”

“In a minute.  A maestro can’t perform on an empty stomach,” Hartley sniffed, but then frowned as he listened to faint sounds only he could hear.  “There’s some kind of commotion outside; what’s going on?”

James stood up and looked out the window for a few moments as his friend continued eating.  “Oh, so it turns out that your blatt got loose.”

“And people are screaming and running away?”

“Pretty much, yeah.”

“It’s not, like, hurting anyone, is it?”

“No, it’s just hopping down the street.”

Hartley took a few more bites to finish the eggs, then jumped to his feet and tossed all the loose change in his pockets onto the table as a tip.

“Let’s go stop a giant blatt!” the young musician declared as he charged out of the diner with James in hot pursuit. 

“Hart, we’ve talked about this: you leave the rallying cries to me.”

“Sorry, sorry, I just got caught up in the moment,” Hartley said sheepishly as they stopped in front of the huge eighth note and it reacted joyfully to see the musician.

James looked thoughtfully at the blatt, which was bouncing up and down in front of its human and tooting excitedly.  “Could we maybe turn this thing against Grodd?  That might solve both our problems!”

“It’s an innocent music note,” Hartley replied, hurt.  It leaned over and he patted its flag fondly as the creature bounced higher and trumpeted at him.

“And we’re innocent Rogues up against an evil monkey with telepathy!  We need to use every tool in our arsenal, Piper.”

Hartley thought about things for a few moments, then pulled out his pipe.  He flexed his fingers in preparation to play, and cracked his neck a bit.  “All right, I guess it does seem immune to whatever we throw at it.  Let’s go in search of Grodd!”

James took to the air, and Hartley started to play his flute as he began walking.  The blatt followed, and thus began a leisurely stroll through the city streets with a giant music note travelling behind.  People stopped and stared, confused by the spectacle.

“What’s going on..?” one stranger asked another.

“They must be advertising something fun -- look at that weird thing and their funky clothes!”

“I bet it’s a parade,” a third person suggested, and that was all it took.  Soon a few people were walking behind the Rogues, and that attracted even more followers.  Some were staring at the giant blatt as it bounced, while others jammed along appreciatively to Hartley’s music.

“You’re a real Pied Piper!” James exclaimed, taking a few photos from the air with his phone.  Hartley just smiled and kept playing, choosing a few jaunty tunes to keep the crowd entertained.

The blatt would occasionally get distracted by other music sources as the group travelled, but always continued following its human as he moved forward.  No coaxing was needed.

And it wasn’t long before James and Hartley could hear the scuffle between Grodd and the other Rogues despite the ambient noise around them.  James came down to the ground to manage the assembled crowd and keep them out of harm’s way, while Hartley ushered the blatt to the scene of the battle. 

Neither the Rogues nor Grodd seemed to notice the newcomer or the strangely huge music note, absorbed as they were in their fight.

“Okay, buddy,” Hartley said carefully as he scratched its flag and pointed at the angry gorilla.  “Help your pal and go get `im!”

The giant creature tensed and leapt, striking Grodd’s back and instantly knocking the wind out of him.  The gorilla fell to the ground, dazed, and the Rogues whooped with joy even though most of them had no idea why the large blatt was there.

“You did it!  Great job, buddy!” Hartley cheered, patting the note’s flag appreciatively when it came over for praise, and it cooed happily at him.  But Paul Gambi approached the group as they celebrated, looking quite serious despite their happy mood.  He wanted the Rogues away from the scene for reasons of his own.

“Now you gotta go!  Some of you are still wanted men!” he urged, and they couldn’t argue with that logic.  They all began running before the cops inevitably arrived to investigate the brawl.

“So what are you going to do about that big note?” James asked as they headed for their current safehouse, the blatt at their heels.

Hartley thought about the matter as they ran, turning back to look at the strange creature bouncing enthusiastically behind him.  “You know what, I think it could be a pretty good pet.”

[dalesramblingsblog]

Lemon Jelly. Creationism. Fight Club. The cinema of Hal Hartley. All this and more will be touched upon in the Dale's Ramblings Sixth AnniVARsary Spectacular, as we look at the last of Virgin's Decalogs.

[lacuna-lunax]

02/12/24

uhhh merry whatever I guess, 'tis the freakin' season.

Monday 2nd 799

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Relentless Raspberry Zero Sugar

Sainsbury's Be Good to Yourself Tomato & Basil Pasta Ready Meal For 1 354

Fulfil Peanut Butter Chocolate Flavour Vitamin & Protein Bar

Terry's Chocolate Orange Minis

Tuesday 3rd 666

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Stamford Street Co. Macaroni Cheese Ready Meal For 1 487

Barebells Raspberry Cream Protein Bar

Milkybar Giant Buttons Raspberry Ripple

Wednesday 4th 736

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Stamford Street Co. Cheese & Tomato Pasta 417

FULFIL Chocolate Salted Caramel Vitamin & Protein Bar

Cadbury Dairy Milk Orange Chocolate Giant Buttons

Thursday 5th 714

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Relentless Raspberry Zero Sugar

VFC Chickn Fried Rice One Bag 439

Cadbury Dairy Milk Orange Chocolate Giant Buttons

Munchies Milk Chocolate & Caramel

Friday 6th 703

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

VFC Chicken Curry One Bag 450

Misfits Cookie Butter Flavour Plant Based Protein Bar

Cadbury Crunchie Rocks

Saturday 7th  734 – 2 Fizz

Coffee

Grenade Carb Killa Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Sainsbury's Vegetable Tikka Curry with Rice Ready Meal For 1 443

Lindahls Kvarg Stracciatella with Chocolate Pieces Protein Yogurt 150g

Lindahls Strawberry Sundae Pro + Kvarg 150g

Ritter Sport Nut Selection Pistachio, Limited Edition

Sunday 8th 790 - 8 Fizz

Coffee

Grenade Carb Killa Chocolate Chip Salted Caramel

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Plant Pioneers Vegan Meat Free Lasagne 363

Hartley's Lemon and Lime Jelly Pot

Lindahls Pro Kvarg Lemon Cheesecake Protein Yogurt 150g

Cadbury Dairy Milk Wholenut

Monday 9th 799

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Relentless Raspberry Zero Sugar

Sainsbury's Be Good to Yourself Tomato & Basil Pasta Ready Meal For 1 354

Barebells Caramel Choco Soft Protein Bar

Cadbury Dairy Milk Caramel Nibbles

Tuesday 10th 688

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Sainsbury's Spinach Ricotta Cannelloni, Taste the Difference Ready Meal For 1 465

Fulfil White Chocolate Cookies & Cream Flavour Vitamin Protein Bar

Aero Melts Milk Chocolate

Wednesday 11th 703

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

VFC Chicken Curry One Bag 450

Barebells Coco Choco Soft Protein Bar

M&M’s Salted Caramel

Thursday 12th 714; 525

Coffe

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Relentless Raspberry Zero Sugar

VFC Chickn Fried Rice One Bag 439

Battle Bites Dynabar High Protein Bar Chocolate Hazelnut Flavour

Aero Bubbles Peppermint Mint Chocolate

Dunkin' Jelly Donut-Flavored Filled Chocolates 210

Friday 13th 607; 555

Coffee

Belvita Breakfast Biscuits Strawberry & Yogurt Crunch

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Chicago Town Sub Cheese & Tomato Pizzas 546

Hartley's No Added Sugar Orange Jelly Pot

Lindahls Pro+ Kvarg Blueberry Muffin Protein Yogurt

Milkybar White Chocolate Giant Buttons

Twix Caramel & Milk Chocolate Fingers Biscuit Snack Bar 246

Saturday 14th 734 - 2 Fizz (+10); 600

Coffee

Grenade Carb Killa Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

Monster Energy Drink Ultra Zero Sugar

Sainsbury's Vegetable Tikka Curry with Rice Ready Meal For 1 443

Jutrzenka Be-be Biscuits

Kellogg's Rice Krispies Squares Marshmallow

Cadbury Dairy Milk Chocolate Fruit & Nut

M&S Food Victoria Sandwich 284

Sunday 15th 724 - 2 Fizz; 585-600

Coffee

Grenade Carb Killa Chocolate Chip Salted Caramel

Relentless Watermelon Zero Sugar

Young's Salmon Pie 430

Hartley's No Added Sugar Raspberry Jelly Pot 115g

Sainsbury's Double Chocolate Brownie

Wedel Milk Chocolate with Raspberry Filling

M&S Moist Carrot Cake Slice 274

[4ngel111]

DAY 3 ~

Net cals - 783

Exercise - none

Food - 50g Spinich (12 cals) + 100g cucumber (16 cals) + cherry tomatoes x4 (12 cals) + 2 tbsp hummus (99 cals) + olive oil tsp (40 cals) + remedy kitchen salmon salad bowl ( 550 cals ) ONLY ATE HALF THO but still logging it all + hartleys strawberry jelly (10 cals) + 10 strawberries (50 cals)

Overall ate way too much today i hate that I’m going to bet bloated :/

[judeharoldvich]

my ego is like a little pot of hartleys raspberry jelly

[anasgoodgirl]

ana diary 15/1/24 🫶

1pm - Hartley’s jelly & rice cakes - 90cals

6:30pm - Fajita, baby corn, 40g waffle fries - 448cals

total - 538cals

burned walking - 330cals

net day - 205cals

——————————————————————————————

trying to stay at around 500cal total a day, hopefully less because i have a party this weekend & i wanna drink but alc has so many cals. pls drop low cal alc recs if you have them!

i’m also finding it hard to get going, id been eating almost normally then dropped straight to 200 net cals, but i cant afford to eat more rn. just gotta stay motivated!!

all sp0 100% welcomed atm ahaha!

[miidnighters]

He raises his head to look at her and Hartley simply grins - as if she knows exactly what she's doing when she says things like this.

"If I'd realised that was why you were avoiding me, I'd have sucked your dick about it days ago." She teases back, reaching out to brush gentle fingers over his chin.

Hartley makes a soft noise when he pulls out, but watches him watch her - stretching languidly under that hungry gaze to elongate the line of her body before she shifts into something more comfortable on her side. She makes sure to hitch one leg up so that he can still see where his cum drips from her pussy.

"Is that so? I'll have to say my own thankyou's, then." If it was going to be anything like round one (and she's sure it was), then the idea of a round two thrilled her. Never before had someone taken her request of not being able to walk so literally, and she loved it. "Does that mean you'll be at my beck and call tomorrow when my legs are still jelly?"

of course she would say that while he is still half-hard inside of her and trying to catch his breath! it's all he can do to keep from snorting when he laughs and kurt ends up lifting his chin to look at her from where he had been previously mouthing at her nipple.

she is glowing. whether that be the moonlight casting it's silvery touch through the window blinds or that he can see the heat of exertion pink and rosy on her skin even in the dark. either way it's stunning and he feels satiated.

"i can hardly believe only an hour ago i was worried you might be sickened by my handsome face," he huffs, grinning. "so glad i have gotten the chance to show you why you should think differently."

carefully, after a moment spent letting their bodies come down from that thunderous high, he slips himself free from her pussy and settles back on his haunches. his eyes drift over her naked form, pausing when taking in the vision of his cum dripping from her cunt.

"i hope you know that it is not a mutant power of mine that my refractory period is very low. it's just a blessing from god."

[sunnflow3rs]

my faaaave low cal snacks (uk edition 🇬🇧)

• fibre90 bars (cookies and cream) - 82 cal

these are so so soooo delicious. i’ll be honest, i don’t feel like they’re really filling but they do me so good when i have a chocolate craving

• salt & vinegar rice cakes (morrisons) - 31cal each

filling anddd yummy. 3 of them fill me up and that’s only 93 cal. would definitely recommend

• chocolate brunch oats (cadburys) - 137cal

these r kinds higher in calories but when i know i won’t be eating anything else that day it’s an amazing snack 😚

• hartley’s 10 cal strawberry jelly - 7cal

so low in calories nd tastes amazing. again, not too filling but way more filling than a fibre 90 bars

short list but apart from fruits nd veggies these r the ones i adore

[margaretshawartwork]

Fungi, Water and Snowdrops

With a fine day, a meander with the camera revealed: The jellies and fungi clusters have enjoyed Kirkby Stephens wet week.

A gushing salmon leap on Hartley Beck.

The first snowdrops spotted in the grounds of the Parish Church.

[h3artshapedcandy]

Took my bf for cocktails for his 30th and I had a stupid silly cocktail that just tasted like Hartley’s strawberry jelly. Was good.

[jelliclebellsthatjelliclesring]

Yo

I made the Vimto one

It’s delicious

No nuts and made with Hartley’s Jelly and dilute hot tea water (I decided to Anglicise it as revenge for calling this thing a “salad”), so really it’s a cheat berry cheesecake

Random B. Dylan Hollis Thought

A: Read Baking Yesteryear, is as delightful as I expected. includes quite a few recipes he hasn’t done on the show, but also omits a few I was really looking forward to. Ah, well can’t have everything.

B: He’s done a couple of bits to to promote it that I have seen on Youtube and am now going to post:

C: I am weirdly fascinated by the Coca-Cola Salad…

(which won’t embed)

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/gEofBtgja1Q

…which Dylan notes isn’t terrible, and has potential. I wanna know if anyone’s figured out how to make a good version.