#HOOOOOOO BOY
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[ 3tan11 ] 😗
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a/n: i was niiiiice bc the snippet i initially screenshot was definitely not the same mood LOL but i figured y’all wanted something good🥺💕 anyways I love y’all and I miss y’all so much. Just know that I’m thinking about you all the time.
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IN WHAT WORLD WOULD YOU NOT USE LUCK AGAINST A WISH SPELL MY GUY
THAT WAS ALMOST SO BAD BUD
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Gang. Gang i. I don't think I can do this anymore. Gang. Ga
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Dave having the band pray together before every show is the cutest thing ever, I wish religion was real.
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"Oh boy, my slight increase in med dosage is making me feel my emotions more, I can't wait to get home and see what I c-"
-Sees my MIL's vehicle in the driveway
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I NEED TO SEE THE LIGHT IN HIS EYES WHEN HE LOOKS AT HER
I NEED TO SEE THE WAY HE SMILES WHEN SHE DOES ANYTHING. BUT WHEN SHE LAUGHS. OH WHEN SHE LAUGHS. THE WAY HIS FACE LIGHTS UP AT THE ONE THING THAT CAN BRING HIM OUT OF A PANIC ATTACK. LOOKING AT HER WHEN SHES NOT LOOKING AT HIM BECAUSE SHES HIS.
I NEED TO SEE THEM HUG. I NEED LITTLE SNIPPETS INTO THEIR JACKSON LIFE. DAY TO DAY. THE MUNDANE THINGS. I NEED MOVIE NIGHTS. GOODNIGHTS. MEALS TOGETHER. ADJUSTING TO THEIR NEW LIFE TOGETHER. EXPLORING THE TOWN. TIME WITH TOMMY AND MARIA.
I NEED THEM HOME I NEED THEM HAPPY I NEED THEM I NEED
#I’m fine ok it’s fine#im writing#and watching an edit over and over#and it just#hooooooo boy#anyway the edit is by elvctlc on Instagram it’s the most recent one please watch it#it’s two minutes long#it’s to a house in nebraska#which is the song that Inspired itrywch#and it’s just#I’ve been thinking about it all day#I’ll be thinking about the next six months#anyway feeling normal so normal I’m normal#the last of us hbo#joel miller#ellie williams#tlou rot
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YOU BELIEVE ME LIKE A GOD ILL DESTROY YOU LIKE I AM / YOU BELIEVE ME LIKE A GOD ILL BETRAY YOU LIKE A MAN
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Ah fuck dude not like this. My day did not need to get worse in any way and certainly not this way man
#hooooooo boy#my parents have been running away from the thought of The Gender for years despite theoretically being out to them#we just do this sort of dance around it where my mom pretends it doesnt exist if she doesnt think about it#and gets extremely upset whenever it even indirectly comes up#so now im fuckin. stuck here lying in bed cause i threw my back out#she comes in to give me the medicine i asked her to get from my desk#starts fussing around with some shit on one of the boxes in my room#but because im fucking STUPID#i forgot to throw out my nametag/ID thing from my work trip a few weeks ago#and it has my fucking pronouns on it#so now we are in a very uncomfortable cold war scenario AND I AM STUCK IN MY FUCKING BED UNABLE TO GET AWAY FROM ANY OF THIS#kill meeeeeeeeee i truly did not need this today or in general#just needed to get through another 3-4 months without incident before i move again for work and can do my own thing#should have set that fucking nametag on fire as soon as i got home
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been reading Annihilation as a normal bedtime story and people won’t tell you this but this book rules
#ick text#just got to the part on the beach w the psychologist#hooooooo boy#(also people absolutely will tell you this; it’s a modern classic jerry)
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4, 5, 7, 9, 12 - Autistic questions!
4. What is guaranteed to make you happy stim?
Music. Specifically the kind of music that just HITS that part of the brain and I'm suddenly rocking in my seat and hear nothing else.
Like the Katey Perry x MCR 'Teenage Dream' mash up. Seriously look it the fuck up.
5. What are some of your happy stims?
Rocking, squeezing, rubbing my face on something soft.
7. What are your favourite textures?
SILKY. Like the american footbal jerseys silky. Fucking LOVE IT. Also super soft things. Like squishmallows with the slightly velvet texture.
9. What are your favourite sounds?
Cat purrs, bag pipes, tiny bells
12. What are your favourite things about being autistic?
Probably that I can create fucking fast. Like hella fast story ideas. It takes me .5 seconds to pick something. (That doesn't mean I know how to make it happen.)
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cool so if i ever feel like i need a good cry, i'll watch episode 5 of link click again 🥲👍
#i dont think a show has made me bawl like this since your lie in april#if ever#hooooooo boy#yeah no this definitely tops ylia#i never couldve watched that unmedicated let me tell you#bruh i just wanted to watch cool looking show with alejandro saab 😭😭😭
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the thing about hazbin hotel is that the premise is creative, the characters are lively and have great unique designs, the soundtrack is incredible, and the cast list is a theater kid’s wet dream…
and yet. it’s a vivziepop production. and it shows.
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hahahahahahahha uhhhhhhhhh
#man i am not feeling great#like ohysically fine but mentally#hooooooo boy#i need a creative outlrt i think#i miss playing music eith my friends#or collaborating creatively with other people#i feel a lack of motion in the creative aspects of my life#music isnt necessarily hard to listen to but i feel very over saturated in terms if music#too much too fast#i want to finish my mobile synth rig but that costs money#i have a funny feeling ill get all the stuff and then eint be motivated to actually make music with it#i have also been feeling exceptionally lonely recently#im concerned i wont find someone#im just tired and want more meaningful connections in my life#but also im savoring my independence currently.#its nice to be so free and independant#no one to answer to and no one waiting for me#but also i crave that#once again i miss you#i hope youre doing well#i hope youre happy#this too shall pass
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oh she’s fucking going for them holy shit
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Hoooooooooooooly shit I think I just came up with the darkest idea for my next part of the Yandere Octatrio stuff--
I kinda love it tho.
#murder is back bois#octatrio#azul#floyd#jade#hooooooo boy#i don't think it's dead dove but boi we getting close
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found out someone who fundamentally fucked me up as a teen not only went on to continue being a horrible person but also got Worse and is getting slapped with karma while here i am, finished 2 college degrees with minimal debt, raised a dog that loves me and is a total sweetheart, and am happy with my life and doing what i have always loved
#when i say i was shocked to hear what i heard... boo lmao yikes#hooooooo boy#cant believe that person is one of the reasons i have trust issues and yet#sometimes a little vindictive pleasure is allowed. as a treat
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