#HE FEELS HE HAS TO BE DEVOTED TO THIS CAUSE AND HE WONT LET HIMSELF DO ANYTHIGN ELSE

[howlsofbloodhounds]

"dead dove with color and killer"

killer's happy ending... derailed? 🥺😢😭

[cw: mention of abuse, abuse apologia]

honestly that feels plausible. killer's perception of what a functional friendship must be so messed up from his experience with chara and nightmare. he thinks a relationship is between a controller and a controlled. i imagine killer imagines his relationship with color as the first time he willingly submits to the role of being controlled. because he trusts color to handle him with care, to have his best interests at heart, to reform him into a good person.

but sometimes, there's this insidious little urge in killer to usurp color, just like he has with chara and nightmare before. but no, it's not for bad reasons this time - this time, it's for the other person's wellbeing. he has good intentions. he needs - he wants - to protect color from all the bad things that color finds himself in. what good is being someone's tool if your owner can't use you properly?

Cw: abuse, dead dove do not eat, and also yandere type of shit and blood and violence in the edit/audio

Just in time for me to have came across this audio and edit lmao.

But yeah you get it!! This fucker lives and breathes in his trauma that totally isnt trauma if you asked him.

and like. i can picture him trying to teach color how he feels is the proper way to use him. provoking color is snapping and yelling at him, praising him and thanking him whenever color does something to punish him for “acting out” and “disobeying.”

its like a reverse of color reforming killer. where killer is trying to teach and reform color into being someone he’s not because he thinks itll keep color safe. come on, say something harsh and demeaning. break my arm, shove me into the walls, show me my place.

and like..he gets unbelievably confused and irritated when color doesn’t or attempts to be kind to him. he hasnt does anything to earn that, unless it is part of colors game. (In which case he’d kiss colors feet cause yes he’s learning!)

and like whenever killer lashes out or hurts color he always does it from what he believes is a place of devotion and care. color wont take the rest, he keeps trying to help people who use him, he keeps being hurt by the world because he doesnt understand how it works. its ok, killer will teach him. he will break colors legs if that means the man will finally allow himself to rest, and he cant go out where someone can once again try to hurt him.

and he’s never “needlessly”—in his definition—cruel. he always apologizes so sincerely for causing color any pain and always does his best to take care of him and never ever ever denies color what he needs or whatever he wants (except if that’s to leave killer, or to help fools who are using him damnit.) he never plays any games with colors food and drink and baths and clothes and bed.

and it only lets up when color is forced to adapt. stop trying to give killer any say over anything or control, command him to do what you want. make him do what you want. if you want to give him kindness and he attempts to argue back, sharply remind him that you make the rules here, not him.

and like..killer is sickeningly pleased when color adapts. proud of color even.

and color..he feels sick. color cant help but wonder if he should’ve helped killer at all. or if this is the only way he can help him; by making “proper” use of him, even if color must use his authority to..adjust the rules a bit.

and like..imagine after color is forced to punish killer..he like. breaks down. starts sobbing and crying and shaking and like killer, bloody broken mangled killer, is smiling and crawls in his lap and hugs him. wipes away all his tears and heaps endless praise on him.

..aw man this timeline makes me unbelievably sad.

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Curious what you'd say about Soap for the character ask game. You haven't really spoken about him as much as the others so I'm curious :O (id love to hear about every single character tho i wont lie to you but i have a feeling you'll get asked about those lol)

@nekrosmos asked for Soap too.

Honestly? There is unfortunately a reason. I lingered around fandom for a good few months before I got involved at all. I saw some behaviour from his fanbase that I didn't like and so I made the conscious choice that he's not a character I'd probably be creating much for. I love the art, happy to support creators, etc. Besides, there are so many delicious, delicious rarepairs to love and create for and plenty of gallant, productive, devoted Ghoapers.

He's quite compelling though, and I've got quite a few thoughts and headcanons, and I'm happy to write prompts with him. A few friends on Discord really love him and I like to create for them too, cause happy friends give me the fuzzies. So, you know, a story idea might grip me by the balls and I'll wack out a long form thing.

favorite thing about them

His journals.

Reading those finally gave me a connection with his character that I hadn't developed previously. But they really show how driven he is, how much he wants to be the best he can be, so he's not a burden, so he doesn't let anyone down. He's constantly striving to earn his place to the point that it kills him in the end.

I think he genuinely struggles with wanting to be liked (as part of 'earning his place'), and I think he is often too much for people. Ghost giving back as good as he gets is a comfortable relationship because the line for Ghost is way, way in the distance; Johnny doesn't have to worry like he does with 'normal' people. Neither of them is fuckin' normal.

Price giving him a chance would have been the first step towards the hero-style worship he has for him. "What? Me? Ye want... me? Aye, aye I will be the best fuckin' dog ye ever had, I will bite my own leg off for ye." Everything Soap does is to prove that Price didn't make a mistake. That he was a good investment. And Price, the sly fucker, knows it. He sees himself there.

least favorite thing about them

I wish they had given him a stronger accent and leaned more into that in the games. In fact, I wish that for all of them.

I also think that Soap has capacity to cause great harm without even realising it. Like, we get glimpses of it; he's nearly court-martialled for punching out a copper. In his single-minded pursuit of something, I reckon there could be a lot of collateral damage.

He lacks confidence but will cover it up by being an arsehole and doing arsehole things (such as smuggling a girl on base to impress The Guys). I say I like "least favourite"; I think this makes him compelling as a character. He's not all sunshine and rainbows. He's just as gritty, professional and flawed as the rest of 'em.

favorite line

"You sick bastard..."

"My kingdom for a suppressor..."

"Price?... This belongs to you, sir."

brOTP

Gaz & Soap

OTP

Uh... none really. Ghost/Soap?

nOTP

Don't have any strong feelings on any.

random headcanon

He's really bad at team sport. He showed no interest in any when he was growing up. Gym? Running? Swimming? Anything where the only competition is himself and his own limits? That's where Soap's head is.

unpopular opinion

Honestly? I don't know which of my opinions would be unpopular. Probably the 'not sunshine and rainbows' one, maybe?

song i associate with them

favorite picture of them

[bartxnhood]

5sos masterlist

calum hood

older | fluff; in which the two of you share a personal moment together.

broken pieces | angst & fluff; calum let's distance grow between the two of you, afraid of what you would think if you knew how he was feeling.

boat boy | fluff; in which you meet calum on an accidental run in, thanks to your crazy pup. things take a turn for the best.

beside you | fluff ; while calum is on tour, you often send him videos of your daily life while he's gone. until you stop randomly and work on a surprise for him

you don't go to parties | calum hood x reader ; angst ; you're sick of being a celebrity's girlfriend. sick of the parties, all of it. it was bullshit

need you now | angst ; fluff ending; calum wonders if you think about him as much as he thinks about you.

sorrys never enough | angst : you're betrayed again by your boyfriend, who just can't seem to keep his promise

luke hemmings:

end up here I angst; luke has let his work consume him, leaving you alone for weeks on end. you finally snap.

place in me | angst and fluff; in which luke realizes the pain and suffering he's caused, he makes a promise to himself to fix everything. he wants to be the better man for you.

magic | fluff; before a show, luke is struggling with his makeup. he asks you for help.

please try again | angst ; comfort; luke has always been there for you, even when you were at your worst.

teardrops on my guitar | ; angst ; your feelings for your friend go unnoticed, but one night you finally told the world how you felt through your music.

wanna be yours | slow burn ; luke had his eyes on you from the moment you met him so, it killed him when you couldn't take the hint that he was in love with you.

it’s not over | requested.

michael clifford:

complete |; fluff; you surprise michael after his long tour, all he's been wanting is you.

fall shenanigans | ; fluff; carving pumpkins with michael

ashton irwin:

locked inside | ; fluff ; the two of you get snowed it. which means: snowballs, snow angels, and snowmen.

dear devoted delicate I fluff; ashton knew from the first time he met you, you were the one for him.

why wont you love me? | angst : after finding out calum had left you, ashton came to your rescue but he had his own secret

complete mess | requested

[prettyrealm]

monsta x i.m mini personality reading

this reading is a paid commision, thank you so much for trusting in me! <3 celebrity commissions • personal commissions

+ positives

a pretty easy going guy, accepting of how life works in general (“it is what it is”, “if it comes let it, if it goes, let it” mentality). he doesn’t try to control things that he can’t and doesn’t fret over it. i.m really seems to appreciate women, he thinks women deserve rights and truly believes they are equal to (and in some cases, better and stronger than) men. for ex, if he was with a woman richer or more famous than him, he would simply be very proud to be with her. he tries to understand the struggles women go through, he’s very understanding of even negative traits displayed by women (he doesn’t expect women to be perfect and understands we go through a lot). i.m is humble in a sense that he doesn’t think he’s better or worse than anyone else - “I’m just a regular human being, the same as anyone”. he is very individualistic and unique. he knows how to appreciate luxury without being materialistic. i.m wants to have a truly strong love and marriage where both parties are really good people to each other - he wants to grow with someone. he isn’t a jealous person - if people around him are smarter, funnier, more charismatic etc. than him, rather than being envious or jealous, he’s just happy to have that sort of energy around him (this is also because his self-confidence is strong enough to know that someone being funnier or smarter than him doesn’t make him unfunny or not smart). i.m tends to have a lot of faith in life and the universe to the point where when bad things happen he just thinks “it wont be like this forever” (so in this sense he has a very positive and optimistic outlook). he’s open-minded and may even try to educate himself on issues that happen in other countries, again a very accepting person (like it’s unlikely for him to be homophobic for example). I think he has a healthy relationship with sex. he is not a lazy person - just because he believe things work out like they’re supposed to doesn’t mean he’s lazy and only going to wait for good things to come to him, he knows he needs to put in effort so he still goes after what he wants. he has a positive view of and healthy relationship to family (it’s likely something he wants, and his appreciation for women likely comes from a good example set by his parents/his own mother or women he grew up around)

- negatives

i.m can be a bit paranoid, untrusting and very distant. he is super closed off - he does not open up easily at all, when he does open up it’s pretty superficial. he can be bad at letting people know what’s going on with him - like he’ll tell you he ended up breaking up his gf, but you didn’t even know he had a gf in the first place (just the vibe of never fully knowing what’s going on with him). due to being so untrusting, he always wants to know way more about other people he meets before he’s willing to open up to them. he may even lie a bit to protect himself due to this (like if he gets the feeling that you’re prying way too much and not understanding that he doesn’t want to open up to you, he will lie to you to get you off his back.) i.m really wants a close relationship, but he fails to realize he can’t expect next level loyalty and devotion from a woman he refuses to even open up to (he struggles to understand equality/give and take in this sense). since he finds it so hard to trust people, he may even reach for red flags and cause arguments over things he’s made up in his head (“do you even really wanna be with me? I can’t tell.”), he will later realize he’s acted out and apologize, but it still kills the vibe and puts the other person unnecessarily on edge (even if he isn’t accusing them of super bad things). he just needs a lot of proof you’ll really be there for him before letting people in. and while he has self confidence, he can be overly confident (not necessarily arrogant), but he can have big and unrealistic goals due to his unwavering faith in the universe, i think it’s likely he even has a problem with actual gambling due to this. he can be a bit irresponsible overall due to his “sky’s the limit” mentality. I think he may also be stuck on a “first love” or “the one that got away” so it’s hard for him to let other women in.

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 15

welcome the the fifteenth fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.  

1. there, nestled against his pulse by @hiuythn

stop why are you doing this to me stop it stop it stop--

klance soulmate au where your right wrist has the first words your soulmate says to you, and the left holds the last words they'll say to you. super sad, so much angst, and i've been informed it'll make you sob until you choke.

1. there, nestled against his pulse (the main story, from Keith's POV) 2. this is what love looks like: (tnahp from Lance's POV + 38k of sequel content) 3. roll credits (deleted/extra scenes and additional headcanons)

okay. i am so desperately obsessed with this fic, i was obsessed with it the first time i read it and im obsessed with it now. and yes i know i did all hiuythn fics last week and i promise i wont this week. BUT i have a set of comments associated with this fic bc it is Just That Good and so i shall present them to u now:

- literally the funniest characterization of shiro i’ve ever read. this shiro is gay and tired. this shiro unironically and frequently says “move. i’m gay” and gets away with it at the garrison. this shiro has been through A Lot and just wants to fucking retire - allura here is so so funny she’s such a badass. she’s giving “i love shiny things! like the shine of your spilled blood on the floor if you say that dumb shit one more fucking time!!” we stan a queen. - coran is a Mood. this man is desperately trying to reign in four teenagers and two young adults and just wants to go to bed and also he cares for them all so so much. ultimate dad - pidge is Mischief Personified. she is a brat and i adore her. she’s here to cause problems and by god she will succeed - hunk is so done it’s so fucking funny. “that’s literally impossible.” he’s a genius and he knows it, he’s glad to call you out on your bullshit. he doesn’t even TRY to pretend he can keep a secret and/or handle drama god what a mood - don’t even get me started on klance!! they’re so funny omg. the banter is EXQUISITE. lance and keith adore each other so much and they’re so badass. literally the coolest power couple fight scenes ever to be made, i do adore. gosh. and the ROMANCE they are so devoted to each other i’m emotional - honourable mention of lance’s legs and keith’a Soft Squishy Feelings that are mentioned so often that they’re characters. iconic. all in all, the best way to describe this series is Gay and Tired. i love it and i’m sad to see it end. i will be rereading it an embarrassing number of times. infinity/10

2. all the little things by @jilliancares

Or: 5 times Keith let Lance get away with things that he'd never let anyone else do, and 1 time Lance realized that he was, apparently, special

oblivious lance will always be funny to me. and the idea of keith just letting lance get away with Everything and Everyone knowing how whipped he is except for lance himself?? peak humour. never not funny

3. Full Disclosure by @dragonomatopoeia

Keith is impulsive and straightforward when it comes to most things, and emotions are no exception. It's no surprise, then, that when he realises that he might have developed a crush on Lance, he tries to tell him immediately. Unfortunately, it's very hard to account for both circumstance and who Lance is as a person.

Alternatively: Four Times Keith Tried to Confess and One Time Lance Actually Understood

more 2016 eliteness!! this fic is hilarious. and also its number one selling quality is that all of the characters are trans and nd i literally love that for them. nonbinary hunk loml

4. catch me, before i fall by @pastelrainbow

‘We are a good team.’

Even now, just recalling the way Lance had smiled as the words left his lips, made Keith’s heart race and his cheeks redden. Lance had never looked at him so fondly before. No boy ever had. The thought of it made a sigh escape his lips and Keith hunched his shoulders, a pout tugging his lips downwards.

Curse my weak gay heart.

-

a what if keith caught lance outside his cryo-pod.

the idea of keith being a suave casanova with more game than aphrodite herself but immediately going bright red and hissing when shiro teases him. peak dynamic. absolutely nailed siblings 

5. of demons and dates by spartona (faveour)

Three times Keith scares Lance shitless with his ghost shenanigans, and one time Lance tries to retaliate.

first of all. BFU KLANCE BFU KLANCE BFU KLANCE. second of all. the  “we’ve BEEN dating u dumbass ily” trope is so funny to me. i will never get over it

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[wri0thesley]

ok but thoma being soft and caring after the bday gift. reassuring words and soft touches skkdkd him cleaning you up (partially also because he knows ayato would definitely not appreciate finding thomas claim on you after the clock strikes midnight and he is not protected by his bday). seeing that youre definitely too spent to walk back yourself so he carries you back bridal style while kissing ur forhead every 5 seconds cause its the last time hell get to be this close to you and also have the tenderness reciprocated

on another note. ayato being jealous of the way u looked at thoma w such adoration (ofc he wont show it, hes to proud for that) so when youre back he drops the commissioner act for a second. yes, tomorrow youre back to ur regular scheduled teasing and powerplay but for tonight he allows u to see a softer side of him. he wants the spotlight on himself again, to win back that devotion

hhhhhh aaaaaaaa im gonna eat them both nat i am not ok aaaaaaaaaaaaa

UGH the idea that seeing you and thoma together has rankled ayato enough that he lets his act drop a little; that he's soft with you, that he's warmer with you, that he makes it sound as though he genuinely appreciates you. a brush of his hand across your cheek as he murmurs; "ah, songbird, you know i'd be utterly undone without you, don't you?" coaxing you into feeling for him, so that the warmth you saw in thoma's eyes and the comfort you felt in his arms dissipates next to ayato telling you that he needs you!!! ugh nkjfbgkjnbgfnkj. poor poor reader. poor poor thoma.

[flying-bear-tv]

WWDITS RANT <3

Ok i just finished watching the WWDITS season finale and It made me laugh so much but also some of it was shitty and i feel like sharing to the class.

So most insane things first I have no idea why Guillermo decided not to be a vampire. It is even explicitly shown how great he feels after drinking human blood like he is ready??? and then suddenly its like a switch flipped and he has a problem killing a human. He has never really gave a shit about that for FIVE FUCKING SEASONS. He is even like yeah i know i dismembered a shitton of body and lured people to their deaths and killed a shitton of vampires (who tbh he can definitely empathize with like humans as he has been involved with them for years) (OVER 10 YEARS) but i cant suck this guys throat owo. Like he has devoted his entire life to this for a decade and all of a sudden he backs out? I'm not saying this isn't just weird bad writing but the lamp nandor pulled out was the big one which he knows has no wishes left. I think its possible either nandor wished that Guillermo wanted to be human OR Guillermo purposely got himself turned back into a human so Nandor could be the one to turn him. Like he had everything set up with the necromancer to undead Derick pretty quickly...... idk im just saying. Also It feels like nothing has changed. I wish Nandor would have helped him with dericks body or something. Just to show that Guillermo is accepted a little more. I know you guys will debate me on this but its the little things like that that make you really feel part of the group. Lazlo came in clutch as always though I love him so much he really is one of my comfort characters of all time. (I even think that if my theory ends up being the case that Lazlo knew about Guillermo's plan cause that would definitely go along with the theme of Lazlo and Guillermo hiding stuff from the others throughout the season) But yea. Weird ending with Guillermo and im gonna be PISSED if there isnt a seriously good explanation for that.

Next: the Guide... Yea WHAT THE FUCK they did her so dirty like no hahah we liked you the whole time haha. Are you for serious. are you joking with me. This could have been a HUGE chance for character growth on the vamps part. They could have realized that yea. healthy relationships need to have mutual respect and both people need to contribute. They could have brought Lazlo's journey with him becoming a bit more human this season full circle. Nandor could have realized that how he has treated Guillermo is not great. He could have been like yea no wonder he got turned by someone other than me. I have been using him to do dirty work for years and stringing him along with the promise that I would eventually turn him which even I convinced myself was true in order to keep things just as how theve always been. I wont kill him because he means more to me than a stupid vampire rule that im only doing because its what is always done. (Like Nandor realized he didn't want to kill Guillermo after a second of seriously thinking about it.) Guillermo could have let him out of that cage and they could have hugged and figured out what to do like the fucking found family they are damn it.

NADJA ......... nadja's whole thing this season was the fact that she treats people like shit and is pretty selfish and she didnt even have a moment where she actually showed change. IM SICK IM DYING IM THROWING UP IN THE STREET.

I realize that them liking the guide the whole time is a funny joke but guys. was it worth it. was it fucking worth it...

For the things I liked lol I really liked Lazlo he is allways slaying his fits were spectacular his matching hair with Nadja is incredible He is a real friend to Guillermo and everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious.

Im glad the guide got some kind of revenge she deserves it I love her.

Guillermo hiding out in the motel was funny and i love how everyone visited him individually.

Guillermo being really happy after turing into a bat and getting his fangs was also really cute

Also "this meat has kissed the grill" i started crying i have no idea why this was so funny to me

Nandor stalking the fucking panera bread and setting up a whole fake ritual for Guillermo 10/10

also final round of applause for Nadja and Lazlos hair and outfits this season. I wish i were them.

anyways funny vampire show heheeh i wont get too upset about it and i wont make a conspiracy about how they wrote it bad on purpose because I cant cope with reality *cough* good omens fans *cough* SORRY but guys... guys... its not 2017 wake up please we dont need another TJLC please I have to say somthing.

love you all touch grass <3

comment 💥if you read all of this shit i want to know

[amoirsetpacis]

★ --;; "Only 'cause you always fall asleep whenever I try and put one on," Vash nearly pouts. He doesn't, though; likes being able to card his fingers lazily through dark strands as Wolfwood dozes, being able to trace patterns on his skin. To that end he presses up against Wolfwood in turn, glad to trap the warmth between them until the warmth of the cabin supplies it in their stead.

The jolt of the cogs turning only serves to jostle their shoulders together, Vash's oversized prize sitting on the bench across from them. After take off it smooths out again; the enormous wheel is slow, its mechanisms devoted to keeping them even and steady.

"Awe, I can't go tellin' ya' all that," he smiles quietly, as if any louder would disrupt the bubble they've found themselves in-- never mind its physical shape of the carriage. "Then you'd know about my whole master plan." His cheek leans into the warm palm against it, not bothering to hide his own softened gaze; he's with the singular person he trusts the most to lessen old masks to begin with, and even if he gets teased for it he can't particularly find it in himself to care.

The thumb held up to Wolfwood's face traces the line of his nose, the curve of his cheek. He'd memorized them a long time ago, knows their angles by heart, but hell would freeze over before he ignored a chance to remap them. The flashing lights from the rides close to them bounce off the glass of the carriage and across the planes of Wolfwood's face, shine red and blue and green against the hair at the crown of his head. "All night, huh?" Vash hums as he does so, matching lazy grin on his face. "You tryin' ta' be sweet on me or somethin', mister?"

Despite his teasing, Vash is the one to close the already small gap between them, thighs and hips pressed together, lips soft. It's as easy as anything, now, and the thought still makes him feel warm on the inside. It's just shy of being a chaste thing, and he pulls a hair's breath away to go back in-- before pausing, as if remembering something, then turning to their stuffed companion.

It has two cute little eyes stitched on one side-- and just happens to be looking at the both of them. Vash's free hand reaches over to grab it and twist it around to face the other direction. It's when he glances up again that he catches sight of bright orange pinpricks in the dark now quickly seeping into the sky, almost complete in its assent; they're little fires, interspersed on the beach below, just far enough away from the lapping of the waves that they wont be touched. The ones closes to the pier are lit up just like the inside of their carriage, but the further away from the rides they are the more the orange dots seem like beacons in the dark, inky black silhouettes flitting between them.

"Nick, look," he points, leaning forward just barely as though it would give him a better look. "Let's go! Before we head home. It looks like fun!"

It still doesn't feel real sometimes, this life they've found themselves in. There are still so many times where Wolfwood needs to sit down with Vash, hold his face, and just look at him. Map out the curve of his nose and the strong edge of his jaw, his rosy cheeks, strong eyebrows, that little mark under his eye with his fingers. Because he's real, they're both real. His heart beats strong and true in his chest.

When Vash pulls Wolfwood along with him Wolfwood's staring at the back of his head with wide eyes, like he hung the moon and stars. He doesn't even really afford the Ferris wheel much of a second glance, too focused on the man who holds him like he's something precious.

He drops the moony eyes the second Vash looks at him again because he is not going to be teased for that, no way. Vash would probably tell him he had a funny look on his face, and then remember the first time he said that to him, and then there would be realizations, and then the realizations would not stop coming.

"I don't watch rom-coms, y'know that." Wolfwood lightly bonks their heads together, like a cat asking for attention. If he could, he'd probably be purring like a cat, too, and then he'd get embarrassed about purring. "We're gettin' a cabin all by ourselves, I hope."

Would suck to be stuck in one with some random people they don't know. The line steadily shuffles forward as people leave their cabins and make room for the next small family or couple or group of friends. With the night, the temperature drops harshly. He's finding himself pressing closer to Vash, who runs so much warmer than he does.

They're finally ushered into one of the cabins. The door shuts and locks, and they can look out through the windows. He finds that the cabins seem to be climate-controlled—so it's warm in here, while it's chilly outside. He grunts as it jolts a little bit as the wheel begins to turn again.

"How long've you wanted to get me on this thing?" He says, turning at the waist so he can look at Vash fully. His hand reaches over to Vash's face, turning him to look at him gently. "I've been waitin' to get ya alone all night."

His hand drops to Vash's, curling around it, bringing it up to his lips so he can press his lips to his knuckles, maintaining eye contact the entire time. Wolfwood smiles, with a hint of teeth, and turns Vash's hand so he can nuzzle into his palm.

[prenvii-moved]

CPHER. CYPHER.

[couldyouspeakmyname]

Yandere is a portmanteau of two Japanese words. The first is yanderu, which means “to be sick,” and the second is deredere, used here for “lovestruck.” A yandere is often sweet, caring, and innocent before switching into someone who displays an extreme, often violent or psychotic, level of devotion to a love interest.

(Remember, Yandere’s are toxic, and while it’s fun to write and read about in fiction, it’s not okay in real life. This is your warning)

I’m so sorry anon! Tumblr deleted my draft about the Yandere!Shishigumi ask. I re-did it and I hope it’s okay!

(Sorry for any errors I wanted to post it before tumblr ate it again ;-;)

-Maeve

Ibuki

How they act around you

Ibuki adores you. How could he not? You’re everything he’s ever wanted in a partner. He can’t let you know that though, he doesn’t want to overwhelm you or scare you off. Instead, he becomes your friend. He’s there for you whenever you need him, no matter what time of night or day. If he’s not available, he sends someone else to help you. He’s always there, spending time with you, that others hardly ever see you without him. 

He’s supportive of all your goals, and wants to do whatever he can to make them happen. 

Over time you’ll find that no one else is as loving and supportive as he is (he makes sure no one else can be). He wants nothing more than to see you happy, with him.

He’ll quickly becomes your shoulder to cry on, the person you rely on. 

He’s your foundation. 

How they act when angry

Ibuki is extremely protective of you. He doesn’t often loose his temper, but when he does it’s when someone's crossed you. You’ll find that rude, or mean, animals you’ve run into have gone away. Usually you find they’ve moved, or transferred jobs/school/ect. Ibuki makes sure you don’t know what really happened to them. He knows you’d be upset if you knew, but it’s really in your best interest. 

He will go into a silent rage when someone tries to take what’s his. Usually they’re harmless strangers he can ignore, but if they try and give you their number, or pursue you further than one interaction, he looses it. Luckily for Ibuki, you don't know them well, so when they go missing you wont be grieving. 

Free

How they act around you

Free adores you, and it’s one of the most obvious things in the world. He’s always hugging you, throwing an arm around your shoulders, and calls you nicknames. He never even asked you out, but everyone assumes you’re an item by how he acts. He never corrects them, and goes as far as to call you his baby when you’re out of earshot. 

Free loves to tease you. Some jokes are at your expense, but nothing is too intense. He thinks you’re adorable when you get flustered, and have extreme reactions. 

He never leaves you without leaving his scent on you. He hangs on you, or has his arms around you in hugs, and a big part of it his him leaving his scent as a silent warning to anyone who comes in close proximity. Animals don’t hit on those that smell like lions. He does it so often you may even become nose blind to it. 

He will go to your home when you’re not there, invite himself in. 

He goes through your stuff, but is sneaky about it. You wont know he’s logged onto your computer, or that he’s gone through your phone. He’s a feline, so he’s very quiet. Breaking and entering is the least of his crimes.

How they act when angry

Free is volatile on a good day, and that’s not even when it’s concerning you. He loves fighting, violence, and it’s a recipe for disaster when something happens.

Don’t fight with Free. He’s hard to fight with, but if you do Free punches holes in walls, breaks things. He would never turns his violence your direction, but anything else? Free game.

That’s not even taking into consideration what happens when other animals hit on you. The few animals that ignore the fact he’s scented you, don’t live long. As soon as they’re alone, Free destroys them. Free doesn’t kill them outright, he wants them to suffer, and by the time he’s done they’re unrecognizable. 

Dolph (credit to @beqstars for the help!)

How they act around you

He spends time with you. At first it’s with a small group of the Shishigumi, then the group dwindles down until it’s just you and him. It starts happening so much, it becomes natural for it to just be Dolph and you

He starts really weaseling his way in by offering to help you around you home, with any extra work you have.

Before you realize it, Dolph is always with you. The few times he’s not, he actually is. 

Dolph is a feline, and despite his size, he moves silently and in the shadows. He keeps track of you, no matter where you are, and no matter where you go. If he’s not there, one of his cohorts usually is. 

Dolph is intimidating, and while you may assure people that he’s not a threat, their instincts are right. He is. All it takes is a look over your shoulder at someone, and that scares most people off.

Dolph does whatever you need him to, and is very supportive of your endeavors. It wouldn’t be above him to make competition for a job disappear, or for the animal to give it up in favor of your promotion. 

Dolph would risk his life for you, without question. He’d also kill for you, without question. He’d never tell you that though. 

How they act when angry

Dolph has a firm grip on his temper, so it takes a lot for him to get mad. You probably could even go out on a date, and he’d control himself (though he’d persuade that you two were no good for one another calmly). 

What would make him loose his temper is if you kissed someone else, or began limiting your time with him because of affection for someone else.

Dolph’s temper is calm, cool, and lethal.

The person who you began dating may ghost you, or move suddenly. The person who kissed you? Dolph sets him up for something horrible, so you don’t grieve the loss of whoever it was. Luckily for you, in your grief, Dolph is there to comfort you. They were scum anyway. He can hold you, don’t worry. 

Agata

How they act around you

Agata is friendly and sweet, if not a bit shy. He likes to be close to you, but never pushes the limit too far. He just likes being in your presence. 

Due to his sweet disposition, no one ever sees him coming. Plus, Agata has a very dark mane, so when he does speak with authority, no one questions him.

Agata will use his gang connections to keep you safe and keep an eye on you

Agata is easy to talk to, and because he’s so easy to talk to, it’s easy for him to find out your secrets. It’s easy for you to let him in, and let him know your thoughts, dreams, and hopes. He supports all of them. 

You two end up talking so much that he just falls into being someone you can’t picture going without. He’s always there when you need him, even when you don’t call him. He just seems to know. 

Is it okay if he holds your hand now?

He’s going to do whatever he has to in order to make sure you’re happy. No matter the cost. 

How they act when angry

Agata doesn’t get easily angry, but when he does, he becomes a totally different lion

Agata is so much stronger than he lets on, or that anyone knows. He can and will smash skulls when someone looks at you wrong. 

He wont let anyone hurt you. It doesn’t matter if they’re putting you at risk physically, emotionally, or financially. Hell, it doesn’t matter if they just cut you off in traffic, Agata can’t let anyone put his special someone at risk. 

Agata wont do it when you’re around, instead he stalks the animal he’s after, and waits until they’re alone. 

It’s very messy, but he has the Shishigumi to help clean up after him. 

Agata hopes you understands how much you mean to him 

Miguel

How they act around you

Miguel is very quiet, and doesn’t talk without purpose. He just kind of creeps into your life. You think maybe you met him when you went on a walk?

On a bad day, he shows up and cooks you dinner. You don’t question the fact you don’t remember telling him where you lived, you’re feeling bad and he’s there to make you feel better. 

He always responds to texts messages, calls, and emails. He never makes you wait very long for a response.

Miguel will support you, no matter your cause

He looks at you like you’re the only person in the world when you talk. You’re the center of his universe, even if he has a hard time expressing it. 

No one tries anything with your big, burley, shadow. 

Miguel is big, but he’s light on his feet. Miguel has a tendency of following you, even when you don’t realize it. 

He will often sneak into your home, especially when you’ve been busy. He picks up. Nothing obvious, but he dusts, just generally wipes things down. 

He does it more at night than in the day. The day most animals don’t try anything, but the worst kinds of animals come out at night. 

How they act when angry

Miguel is a silent killer. He takes out anyone he deems a threat quickly and effectively. 

That being said, he doesn’t kill for you as often as some others may. 

He doesn’t need anyone to get suspicious. He tends to just...discourage anyone from messing with you. 

They’ll find that their cars are wrecked, their homes have been vandalized. He sends a lot of signs that they need to back. off. 

If they visit the black market? Nothing stands against the Shishigumi, and Miguel isn’t above using his position to intimidate anyone who stands in your way. 

When someone hits on you? Miguel is usually in the background, and one look from an angry Miguel sends whoever it is running. If they ignore him? They’re gone. It’s a good thing he knows where sharks are. 

Sabu

How they act around you

Sabu is very quiet, but he may talk more around you (which still isn’t much)

Sabu is the kind of guy that you’re probably not sure how you two ended up friends, but you are.

Sabu is relaxed around you, and he allows himself to let his guard down.

Sabu knows his desires and need to be around you isn’t healthy, but he can’t help it. He only feels normal when he’s around you. You’re his soul mate, he knows it. 

Sabu just kind of...knows how you feel, even when you can’t put it into words. He’s always around and willing to be your shoulder to cry on if you get upset. 

He also will do any repairs to your car or vehicle. He’s also there to fix anything that breaks in your home.

He’s better at expressing himself in text messages than actually talking.

The fact you’re okay with who he is, and how quiet he is makes you so special to him. 

He’d do anything to make sure you’re happy and secure. Anything.

How they act when angry

Sabu rarely looses his temper. He’s one of the few yandere who are self aware. So he has a mental checklist that allows him to pull himself back from the edge.

The rare times Sabu can’t control himself is when someone starts coming after you romantically. How can they make you happy? How could they? 

Sabu has done everything he can to make you happy, would they do that for you?

They just go missing without a trace. No one knows where they went, or what happened to them. It’s a big city, after all.

If it’s someone you know well, Sabu will stage a flawless accident. No one will question it, and he’s there to hold you when you get upset. 

Jinma

How they act around you

Jinma is a little bit odd on the best of days. He initially is a little stiff and awkward, but he relaxes quickly around you as soon as you start talking to him

He likes to talk with you, pick your brain, and hear you talk back. He could spend just...hours talking to you.

Jinma is supportive of you, especially if you have nay urge to pursue academics. He’ll study with you and help you figure things out. 

Jinma spends a lot of free time with you, any time he can have. 

He likes to learn about your hobbies, and wants to try them out with you, even if they’re bad. If you have a hyper fixation? He’s going to learn everything about it, and listen to what you have to say. 

Jinma tends to plan his life around your schedule, which he knows by heart. You’ll find you happen to “bump” into him while you shop or do errands. 

How they act when angry

Jinma doesn’t get angry very often. When he does? He doesn’t just kill the person, he destroys their life from the inside out

Jinma can easily navigate the black Market, the ‘normal’ part of society is no different. Black mail, threats of violence...nothing it too low in order to make you happy.

Jinma only really kills when someone moves in on you. It doesn’t matter if it’s a toxic friend, a rude boss/coworker, Rex forbid someone trying to take you away! Jinma makes quick work of them. He doesn’t even have to do it himself, he uses his connections. 

Dope

How they act around you

Dope talks his way into your life. he just reads your body language. he waits until you’re vulnerable, then swoops in with something to make you smile.

Dope is very easy to get along with. His ability to do negotiations in the Black Market means regular people and society are a cakewalk to navigate

It’s so easy for you to talk to Dope, you probably don’t realize you’ve given as much personal information as you have. 

Dope Is very supportive of you, and does whatever he can to help you reach goals and milestones. 

If you’re a student or need help with a work project, Dope will spend hours with you helping you out. He is very patient, understanding, and will keep you from getting upset or frustrated.

Due to the fact he’s so good at reading others, you wont realize that he’s manipulating you and the animals around you to get you alone more. 

He loves to touch your shoulder, hold your hands, keep you close. He’s distracting you enough that you probably wont notice until ten minutes later that your hand is in his. 

Dope will go through your personal things when you’re not around. He memorizes your passwords, looks in your emails, texts, and messenger accounts. He’s just making sure no one is moving in on you, and that you’re safe. 

How they act when angry

. Dope rarely gets angry, and actually avoids violence if he can. He’d much rather use his words to manipulate others in order to get what he wants

It’s also not above him to use his silver tongue to make someone else life miserable

Dope will use his connections to the Shishigumi to intimidate those that he deems a threat. 

While Dope would rather avoid violence, he’s not above it. If someone gets too close to you, he’ll get rid of them. 

Dope is fond of knives. 

Hino

How they act around you

Hino comes into your life like Prince Charming. 

He probably just comes up and introduces himself to you. 

Hino is in a very delicate situation, where he has to use his looks for his job, and he tells you about it in a way that will gain your sympathy (he wont tell you his exact job, and just allows you to assume)

While he knows his looks are appealing and the way to get your attention, it’s actually very important that you know him. So he shares his secrets with you when you’re alone, and you do the same. How could you say no to that face?

Hino is instantly hooked. 

After a few months he tells you about his insomnia, and that his roommates are noisy. He asks if he can stay with you every now and again so he can nap on your couch. Saying yes, Hino quickly becomes a semi-permanent resident of your home. He’s there when you get off, and greets you with his soft purring voice and a gentle smile. 

Due to the fact he stays with you so often, he’s always there when someone else is. He makes himself a fixture in your life you can’t remove. 

How they act when angry

Hino is actually easily jealous. He’s not as volatile as many of the other yandere’s, but he has his moments.

He trusts you, and has confidence in his own looks and abilities, so he doesn’t mind if the odd animal idiot hits on you. He knows you wont go after them, not when you have him.

If someone hurts you though, or if someone hits on you and makes you smile the smile that should be reserved only for him it’s game over

Hino will loose his temper.

While Hino looks lovely, his body isn’t just for show. He’s actually sizeable and fast. The animals who crossed you and put his relationship with you at risk are going to pay with their lives. 

It’s actually one of the few times Hino allows himself to get really messy

[mozak-hh]

Genshin impact headcanon:

How they find out they’re in love with you

I was just listening to, “love songs,” by Kaash Paige and I got really imspired to do a cute little headcanon. I would recommend listening to the song while reading this cus it is a major vibe ;)

Pairings: Zhongli, Diluc, Kaeya, albedo

Songs to vibe to for the headcanon lol

Zhongli:

Zhongli’s not used to feeling puppy love, those feeling are beneath gods. Especially after all of his years alive, he thought love was something that had run its course. In his earlier centuries, perhaps, but never now.

After meeting you for the first time, he grow fond very quickly of your childish remarks and youthful attitude. It refreshes him to know that not everyone is made of stone. And after your first encounter he goes out of his way to bump into you more and more often.

This usually disrupts your tasks with Childe, so he is the first one who catches on to Zhongli’s little interest in you. Childe will often bicker with Zhongli about it, but instead of snapping back Zhongli will just act oblivious about it.

Zhongli isn’t the type to think extremely deeply about things, so I don’t think he’ll have trouble accepting his feeling about you. But that doesn’t mean he won’t be surprised, and it might take him a while to really figure it out.

He goes back to the place you first had lunch with him and steals collects the cup from where you sat, holding the fragile price of antique in his hand and turning it slightly, inspecting it. He then circles the brim with his thumb, sighing and putting in his pocket. He then puts it on the shelve in his office. Looking at it time to time.

Further on into your friendship with him. Zhongli finds himself idolising your form and appearance. Caressing you hair when you hug him, lifting the stands to his face for a closer look, you’ll never know that though.

He’ll offer his arm to you when you walk around the harbour with him. Letting you wrap you hand around it while talking about your latest discoveries in Liyue. Rest your head on his shoulder and you may hear him suck in a breath. Trying to compose himself. It’s not everyday gods get attached to humans. So when it does happen, you can expect them to be way more possessive than the average significant other.

Albedo:

this man is quite awkward with his feelings ok? he could write a 30 page essay on the essence of human life but not one sentence could describe the way he thrives when your around him. 

he would see you walk past the alchemy shop everyday, smiling and talking to the shopkeeper. Before he met you he wouldn’t think to much about it, but after the events in Dragonspine, he grows fond of staring at you outside the shop window, leaving his notebooks and research to sit idly and gaze. On some occasions he may even draw you, search through his notepad the next time the two of you meet and you might find out how many pages exactly he has of you. 

the first ones to catch on to his little antics is his apprentices, Sucrose mainly. Though she wont pry too much, as Albedo would often call her ridiculous for thinking such things, she’ll giggle every time she sees Albedo at the window. Knowing exactly what he’s doing. 

One day, while you are staying in Diluc’s tavern, Albedo goes wondering around the stalls in Mondstadt, buying flowers from the little girl near the gates. using his magic he evolves them into luscious blooms of colour, and begins his trek to the tavern. It is only once he reaches your room door does he realise what he’s actually doing. This is when it hits him. That perhaps you are worth more to him than his hunger for knowledge. He lets the flowers drop to floor. So many months of drawing your figure and longing for the taste of your touch and now he’s too scared to even knock on your door? he slouches and walks back to where he came from. Not bothering to pick up those beautiful flowers left behind. It is when you finally open your door to get fresh air do you almost step on them. Noticing their other-worldly hue, you knew only one man would have the kind of abilities to make these.    

A week goes by, and you and Albedo are up in Dragonspine once again to do research on more artefacts he collected. He treads lightly in the snow, gazing at the way your eyes light up as you talk. he then flinches slightly when he feels your warm hand reach for his own, and you look up at him with a smirk. “The flowers where so beautiful, it’s a shame you didn't bring them to me yourself,” you then lightly kiss his cheek and walk off, leaving him a blushing mess in the cold.  

Diluc:

Diluc is known to have little to no interest in women. Much to people’s dismay, this man has no intention of marrying a women so they can steal his money. That is until he met you, of course. 

With him money has no limits, so expect to receive many gifts during your nights out with him, or seeing him after he’s been away on business. Whether that be an embroidered lace from fancy stores, or a jade necklace all the way from Liyue, Diluc will show you a world of luxury. 

Diluc will always place you beside him at dinner parties or fancy ball. Since he’s been surrounded by vicious women his entire life, it calms him to know you’re right beside him. 

there is always a room in the tavern for you, whether you need it or not. The bartenders on duty always know you are allowed to stay after hours, and the drinks always come free of charge. 

After a month or two of receiving these perks, you grow tired of seeing so much of Diluc’s purchases, but never enough of the real him. So you seek him out at his winery. 

you have no luck finding him however, so you opt for waiting in his office until he eventually shows up. While you wait, you notice a large stack of letters, all of which have your name on it. 

Elegant, handwritten love letters. Each and every one of them. Telling you how beautiful you are, and how your smile is always on his mind. In fact, everything about you is edged into his memory, all these gifts you receive having some sort of connection to reminding him of you. The fact that when you wore the dress he bought you last week, it took him days to shake the heat from his body, the longing to touch you. 

After an hour or so of reading these letters, your face is completely red. And as soon as you begin to calm down, the red haired gentleman strides thought the door with a fat stack of papers he needs to sign. You jump from your seat, letters falling out of your lap and down to the floor as you do so. He takes one look at the papers surrounding you, and immediately know what they are. Perhaps if he had been brave enough to send these to you, he may of not been this embarrassed. 

“As much as I am glad that you finally understand my emotions surrounding you, I would have been more keen to have spoke them to you in person. But that can wait for now. How about you join me for dinner?”

Kaeya: 

This lover boy is actually very helpless when it comes to real love. After exposing himself to the elements of your personality, he falls head over heals for you. Possible one of the toughest men to come to term with their feeling to be honest. His flirty and obnoxious behaviour deceiving him in the end. 

Kaeya would prefer to see you in the morning. Having coffee before work with you is his personal favourite. It is these genuine outings that he loves most. Unlike the occasional nights of pleasure he has had beforehand. With you, he feels his heart is more precious to you, not his body. As many women would eventually go with a one night stand with the lesser brother of a rich man, than to have conversations with him over a cup of coffee. 

On a more positive note, Kaeya will start to recruit you for more and more missions just to enjoy your company. It wont be long till people start to assume you are his personal assistant for the knights. Seeing you accompany him on everyone of his outings. This is where you start to use his office.

The both of you slowly start to share the same working space after a few weeks of being on his team. Memories in his office are some of his fondest when it come to you. staying in and having dinner with him after a long day at work. Sharing stories with him during those mountains of paperwork. Joking with him during work breaks. More importantly, comforting him after heavy battles. 

When Kaeya starts to act more like a puppy around you, it is Diluc that teases him bout being a fool in love, and this is what causes Kaeya to finally understand it. Like a break in the ice. All of these months devoting his time to you, never to act on his feelings because on uncertainty. But know he knows he has you, and unlike many of these other women, you wouldn’t be going anywhere. 

Kaeya sits impatiently at the local café, tapping his finger on the table as he glows a light shade of pink. Once he’s sees you coming towards his table, his blush sharpens as he stumbles to grab the flowers he bought you beforehand.  

aaaand there! Another genshin headcanon, sorry such the long wait. I’ve been pretty busy at work :p comment if you have any suggestions x

[blxetsi]

so,, your requests are open, huh?😫😫 like, imagine this ; y/n discovers her family has died, causing them to be all sad and trying to find a way numb all the pain. finding an alcohol, y/n gets *totally* drunk in their own room and it's hange, who finds them on the bathroom floor in pain sobbing and crying, as they help y/n to hold their hair back, while they throw up and then get them to bed, where they end up cuddling hange for comfort or something like that- of course if you're not comfortbale writing this, it's totally alright and i understand! stay safe and have a nice day <33

no bc ive been thinking abt this ask since i got it 🤩 so sorry im getting back to u so late babby 😔💔

promise

hange zoe x gn!reader (or maybe female idk u decide)

warnings: death, grieving, drunk thoughts, WARNING UHHH when i wrote this i literally forgot abt the armoured/colossal titan reveal so lets just assume that never happened in this. teehee !

not proofread but when have i ever done that 🤨⁉️

when you first became a scout, you never expected your job to affect your family.

your family was normal, there wasn't ever any abnormality with it. you all lived normal lives with normal relationships and normal jobs. it was boring at times, but that feeling of boredom quickly became one of safety once you joined the survey corps.

the small memories you had with your family during holidays, and the mementos you've kept safe from letters, hidden away under your pillow will be the only things bringing you that feeling of safety again. but it still wont be the same.

you grew up in ragako village, with marie, your step mother and joseph your father, and your little brother marcus. your biological mother, winnie, died when you were three, and marie was the closest thing to a maternal figure that you had. she may not have been your "real" mom, but she was your mother nonetheless, and you loved her so dearly. you'd give anything to feel her warm hands rub your back when you're sad, or her soft lips to kiss your nose.

your brother was such a playful little thing. he always had a trick up his sleeve, a joke to play on anyone. all he ever wanted was to make people laugh, even if it meant having people laugh at him. he once told you late at night, after your father had told him he needed to take his learning seriously, that he wanted to be a clown when he grew up. you dont know why he wanted to go into such degrading work, especially when he was a very curious and hardworking kid, but you realized that putting on makeup and singing songs for kids was the only thing he could think of that would bring joy to others. you would miss the way he would make fun of the people who made you sad, just to see you giggle with tears running down your face, you would miss the funny faces he would throw at you when you two chopped wood, or the hugs of appreciation he would give you after helping him perfect his spelling on homework.

your dad, joseph, was a very serious man. he was so sad when your mother died, and even though you were so young you wondered if he would ever be happy again. you're glad he was, he loved marie, he would laugh and dance and hold her and kiss her the exact same way he did to winnie. joseph was a man who devoted himself to his family, who prided himself in his hardwork and someone who wanted the best for his kids. he was stern when it came to your education, because he had never taken it seriously when he was young. although things worked out for him in the long run, he had heard too many stories of other folks who didnt, who became dirt poor and homeless. he never wanted that to happen to his kids, he wanted them to be independent, to have drive, and he wanted them to safe with a roof over their heads. you'd miss it when he would take you to see your mothers' grave. rain or shine, whenever you wanted he would always walk with you to the graveyard. even if you said "im old enough to walk alone, im not a kid anymore !" he would insist that he had to take you. "even if you just miss her," he would say "if you need a shoulder to cry on, or a hug, i have to be there just incase." sometimes you regret leaving in the night to become a cadet. you would miss his vegetable stew, you would miss his deep raspy voice singing old folk songs hes heard. you would miss the way he would kiss the top of your head, and rub the stubble on his face on your cheeks to tease you.

you would miss everything about them, the good and the bad.

when titans mysteriously appeared, the survey corps was tasked with not only killing them, but warning nearby villages of the danger. you were tasked with defending wall rose alongside the garrison unit. you knew connie springer, as well as other soldiers from the 104th had been sent to warn the villages.

you remember meeting the cadets, and overhearing a conversation springer had with his friends, braus and kirschtein, about a letter his mom had sent him from his hometown.

"you're from ragako too ? small world !"

yeah it was a small world.

you didnt get back to base until late, but you knew once you got there you needed to find connie. you needed to know your family was okay.

you remember the stupid look he wore on his face, how he ducked his head down to dodge your gaze. the way his hands shook at his side.

"are they okay ? did you help evacuate them all safely ?"

connie shoved his hands in his pockets, shaking his head slightly. "i- i don't-"

that answer only made you more worried. you put your hands on the boy's shoulders as you yelled at him. "springer ! say something !" you pleaded. you wanted the people of ragako to be safe, you wanted your family to be safe, but you think you already knew the answer to your own question.

you were about to say something else, another yell for him to speak up, maybe a quip about you being his superior, but it all died down before it even came out, when you felt a warm hand on your own.

you knew who it belonged to before you even looked. hange.

the section commander looked at you with pity and regret in their eyes. "l/n, drop it for now."

thats what hurt the most. never once had hange ever used your last name when addressing you. it was always your first name, and in the privacy of their office (or bed) it was always a soft whisper of sweetheart.

you felt your eyes burn up as they became glossy, the burn in your throat and the way your cheeks heated up with the way you were trying not to sob.

"they're dead aren't they ?" you asked, and although the question was directed to connie, your eyes couldn't leave hange's.

connie's shoulders shook, and he shook his head no, unable to speak.

you felt like you were being betrayed in some weird way, but you didn't know by who. you ripped your hands off of the kids shoulders, the hand that hange held suddenly feeling cold and proceeded to walk away.

hange watched as you walked down the hallway, continuosly wiping your eyes to keep from crying. the soldier adjusted their glasses, making a mental note to check up on you later, before guiding the boy into erwin smith's office.

hours later, you were drunk in hange's bathroom after stealing a bottle of liquor from under clover's bed. it was cheep, but it got the job done, and if you're being honest clover had a drinking problem anyways, she could deal with no alcohol for a night. if anything you were doing her a favour.

you sighed, your body felt sluggish and your mind felt wrong. you were thinking all of the right and wrong things at the same time. inner turmoil consumed you while flashes of memories from childhood interrupted your thoughts.

how did they die ? thats what you wanna know. the short answer: titans, that much has to be obvious, but maybe they died inside, maybe debris fell on them caused by titans running into buildings, maybe they got trampled on by other people fleeing or horses. you wanted, no, needed to hear the gory details. you needed to know how your family suffered, since its already obvious that they did.

whats the point.

you thought you joined the survey corps to keep your family alive, to keep other families alive.

you wanted to protect others.

hell, you wanted to save the world.

you wished you were there. with them. maybe they didnt die immediately, maybe you couldve tended to their wounds, or at least held them before they left this world.

marcus. he always wanted to make people smile. was he smiling in the end ?

did your dad try and protect his wife and son until his dying breath ?

did your mom try and console herself and her family as destruction raged around them ?

were they in heaven now ?

what were you gonna do now.

maybe you shouldve never left for the survey corps. you shouldnt have left in the middle of the night, only leaving a note telling your family you were pursuing a pipe dream called freedom. you couldve stayed, gotten a job making pottery or become a school teacher. your life could have been mundane and normal and boring instead of filled with death horror and trauma.

why did you choose this path ? why did you choose this life ?

you were always so sure that this is where you belonged, but now, not so much.

i guess thats what happens when your family fucking dies. you start questioning your entire life.

hange wasnt stupid. they knew you were up to no good.

first it was when they stopped by the dorms, trying to find you, only to find a girl by the name of clover, gossiping with other cadets about stolen booze. the woman quickly snapped her mouth shut when she saw the section commander walking up to them. when the group was asked "wheres y/n" everyone's answer was the same. "i dont know."

they then moved to their office, hoping that maybe you were waiting there for them. knowing youd make a fuss out of the use of "l/n" during your last conversation, hange practiced an apology in their head before stopping at their door, that was cracked open.

how the hell did you get in ? oh yeah, the key that hange gave you for "urgent work." meaning late night booty calls.

the stolen alcohol, and the section commander's door being unlocked ? you wanted a private place to drink your sorrows.

it makes sense now.

they opened the door the rest of the way, peaking inside to see it left the way it was. an organized mess left by zoe hange themself. closing the door, they felt your key still stuck inside the handle, before pulling it out and keeping it safe in their pocket.

silence. hange made hurried steps throughout this room and the next, opening the door to their bedroom, only to see it left the way it was this morning, with old clothes strewn around and an unmade bed. finally, their gaze landed upon the bathroom door, and could see a faint light from under it.

the brunette slowly made their way until they stood in front of the closed door before knocking.

"you called me l/n." you said, your voice muffled by the wooden barrier.

hange let out a breath of air through their nose. "im sorry." a beat passed, no one said anything. "are you okay ?"

you sighed. you felt as though your body was moving on your own, like you were watching a movie on a screen. this body felt like jelly, like it wasnt yours. your head felt foggy and your throat was dry, your tummy hurt from all of the alcohol you had consumed. you reached up and tugged on the handle until the door opened, making way for you to see hange's face looking down on you.

they wordlessly came inside, slowly sliding down the wall until their butt made contact with the floor. the section commander said nothing as they watched you play with the almost empty bottle of liquor.

"how did they die ?" your question came soft, like a child was asking it.

after that meeting with erwin and connie, hange wasnt sure they should tell you, either because of protocol or because of your mental state.

a few moments passed, and you took a glance at hange just to find them staring at you.

"i cant tell you that." they whispered.

you nodded, looking back to the bottle that sat in between your legs. "will you tell me anyways ?" you asked, your voice shaking.

hange sighed and looked away, before readjusting their glasses. "you know i," they paused. "you know i cant tell you confidential information just because we're fucking."

you nodded. "are we just fucking ?" you asked.

the brunette sighed again. "you're drunk."

"don't change the subject."

"you know i don't have time for relationships right now-"

"but you feel something." you looked up at them, and even though your eyes were red and you had bags under them, even though your lips had formed into a pout, even with your furrowed eye brows and oily skin you still looked so gorgeous to them. "you do feel something right ?"

hange shook their head. "even if i do, im not going to jeopardize my rank and career to tell you something im not supposed to."

it was silent for a while, yet you thought you could still her their voice echoing against the walls of the tiny space.

"i've never once asked you or tried to manipulate you into doing anything for me because of your rank. all i'm asking is for you to tell me how my fucking family died. i'll never ask for anything from you again ever. i'll even stop talking to you altogether if that's what you want so please, please just tell me the truth."

you sat with your hands in your lap, playing with the zipper of your pants. the bottle sat in front of you on the tiled floor, taunting you in some way you didn't understand. you heard hange shuffle around until their thigh touched yours.

"they got turned into titans. we don't know how, but now we think that all of the titans we've encountered, were originally human."

what.

you felt your blood run cold. it was like the movie stopped, you were back to reality. in this body, in this life, with your sore head, and rough throat and weak body and your stomach aching-

speaking of aching, you really had to throw up.

quickly you passed the bottled to hange so you wouldn't spill, before crawling the short way to the toilet. you heard hange come up behind you before grabbing your hair and rubbing your back. you dry heaved and sobbed all at the same time, while hange shushed you.

"it's okay sweetheart, just let it out. shh, i know baby, take deep breaths for me okay ? that's it, there we go." they whispered. the deepness of their voice calmed you, and weirdly, you hoped this moment wouldn't end.

after a couple more minutes throwing up bile and alcohol into the toilet, you calmed down a bit to be able to be pulled off. you leaned against the bathtub as hange left the room, hearing them fumble around the bedroom and then office looking for something.

just as you were done wiping the tears from your eyes, hange came in holding a water bottle. "it's from a day ago, but its still almost full. you need to keep hydrated sweetheart."

the brunette handed you the bottle before crouching in front of you, hands on your knees as they watched you take gulp after gulp of the warm water as if it was the most wonderful thing in the world.

"there we go, my dear."

everything else felt like a blur as hange pulled you up before leading you to their bedroom. you felt them sit you down on the bed before undoing all of your straps and your belt, pulling you up to take off your boots and pants for you, as well as your jacket and shirt and socks. you were stripped down to your underwear as they led you to lay down, the world spinning when you hit your head on the pillow. they pulled up the covers on your almost naked form, before taking off their own clothes and retiring for the night.

laying in bed with hange, in a way that wasn't sexual, although it had been done before this time was different. maybe it was the effects of the liquor, or maybe it was the somewhat sweet confession hange gave you that night, that made your heart hammer in your chest. your legs shook slightly and you felt so light. "im in love with you zoe." you whispered.

after a couple beats of silence you assumed they were sleeping, which was maybe for the best since you werent thinking clearly.

"i love you too." the confession came out so soft you could've missed it, you would have if you weren't waiting for a response. you turned on your side to look at hange, who's glasses had been taken off and hair was down.

"but i don't know if i can-"

you immediately shushed them, shuffling forward until your body was pressed against theirs, bare chests touching and you could feel just how warm they were all over. "be with me."

their arms came to wrap around you, caging you in their hold. "i don't know if i can, i mean what if something happens out there. to either of us ?" they asked.

you pondered it in your head. how should you respond ? they had a right to be worried about this, people died everyday in this line of work. but you wanted them. you're so selfish you want all of them.

"thats an important question, but one that will remain unanswered until it actually happens. i want you. im in love with you. so be with me hange." you said, grabbing their face in your hands, pulling them closer until your nosed were touching.

the older officer sighed again. "what if i cant make enough time for you-"

"as long as we love each other we'll always have enough time." you whispered, your lips ghosting over theirs.

as if they had a thought of "fuck it" their lips crashed onto yours, it was a rough and messy kiss filled with spit and tongue and teeth. it was an overdue kiss, of desperation, love, fear, and everything in between. this kiss was a promise to you.

and it was a promise you would keep until you died.

uhh i literally wanted to add more but its almost 4:30 and i can hear the birds chirping outside 😔💔 goodnight my friends also REQUESTS OPEN 😋‼️‼️

[touchmycoat]

qijiu bingqiu (bingliushen??) fix-it fic planning blabber

so i think i gotta keep it tight on SJ’s POV. Right before his death, he makes a deal with Xin Mo (who’s kind of a lone operator bc LBH too has to fight its power) to create this alternate timeline in exchange for his cultivation. Xin Mo can open up new dimensions no problem, and with SJ’s cultivation, it even manages to rewind the timeline. That’s not enough though—Xin Mo’s goal is only consumption, so it takes the deal but reveals there’s nothing that will actually change. The price SJ paid only opened the door.

But that’s fine, ‘cause SJ saw it coming. He also strikes another deal, this time with Death itself? Some sort of large cosmic force. The only thing he wants changed is Qi-ge’s death, and in exchange...the universe takes him. SJ will not get to exist in that second universe. SJ takes the deal.

And that’s the start of canon. SJ-as-SQQ can no longer exist. Instead, SY-as-SQQ is brought in. In order to stay cohered though, YQY’s memories and personality get a little glitched—he is physically incapable of recognizing all the ways SQQ is now not SJ. That’s why, despite SY-as-SQQ clearly being OOC, YQY never seems to see it.

Canon happens, now we’re in the post-canon world where bingqiu are married and settling down, but SQQ still kicks it with his buddies LQG and YQY every now and then. YQY still firmly believes SQQ is SJ, to SY’s increasing consternation. Is it just delusions and wishful thinking? The more YQY treats him as SJ though, the worse SY feels—he shouldn’t be stealing all this affection that doesn’t belong to him.

It all comes to head when SQQ overhears public opinion on YQY, how he’s perfect in everything but his crazy devotion to SQQ. SY thinks enough is enough. He can’t bring SJ back but he sure can tell YQY that his Xiao Jiu is dead, right? The System warns him he’ll be punished but that’s fine, it’s just not fair, SQQ can take another little mental horror trip down to BinggeLand if it means YQY can have some closure.

Except that’s not what happens. He gets YQY in private and says, “no, you don’t understand, Shen Jiu is dead.” He sees the recognition in YQY’s eyes, but he also sees the moment that recognition gets wiped. The sad smile that had fallen off of YQY’s face returns, eerily happy, as YQY says, “my apologies, Qingqiu-shidi, I must have spaced out just now, what did you say?”

Right before the System kicks him into another punishment phase, SY tries again: “Shen Jiu is dead!” He sees the recognition disappear once again from YQY’s eyes.

Inside the punishment world, Bingge has him again. “I’ve been searching for an answer to why the sniveling pathetic version of me gets you as his Shizun, and I think I figured it out.” For a moment, SY’s horrified by the possibility that Bingge has figured out his transmigrator status—if his punishment figures it out, would he be trapped inside the punishment forever? But instead, Bingge says, “Liu Qingge is still alive, meaning Shizun didn’t kill him in the spirit caves. Did his survival render such a dramatic change?” SQQ”s like “yup, yup that’s definitely it. We’re such good friends, he really changed my outlook on life, so I treated you better, mhm.”

“Shizun’s very clever then to save his own life this way. Xin Mo’s already told me about your little bargain.”

That’s how SY learns that SJ had made a deal. Holy shit, he’d thought it was just random phenomenon this whole time, but the original goods had made it all possible? He didn’t know whether to thank SJ or curse him.

But that can’t be the whole story—Xin Mo opened up a timeline, that doesn’t explain why SY is here. Bingge doesn’t know this part, but it sure feels like SJ made a second deal, paying with his life.

What would motivate the original goods to do all this? Sacrifice his hard-won cultivation and his entire existence in this last-ditch effort?

The memory of YQY’s glitching came to mind.

Holy shit. SY owns the two of them more than he’d ever thought.

After the punishment, SY goes back home. He’s with Binghe, and LBH can tell there’s something troubling him.

“Binghe, there’s something this husband wants to do, and I need your help to do it.”

“Shizun, anything.”

“...But there’s a risk it might hurt you. There’s a risk it might ruin everything. It might be straight-forward, but it also might not be. It’s safer for all of us—but especially you, Binghe—if I just let things be.”

“But it’s not something that Shizun can just let be, is it? Otherwise Shizun wouldn’t have said anything. Binghe is honored to help. Anything to ease Shizun’s mind.”

“...I promised I wouldn’t let you come to harm again, and I meant that. Whatever happens, remember that I am your husband, this is my call, and you must do whatever you need to do to protect yourself, okay? Swear to me, Binghe.”

SQQ begins figuring out how to use Xin Mo to go fetch SJ from the other timeline. He figures that if Bingge could exist in this dimension without destroying the space-time continuum, the same ought to be true for SJ. Only trouble is, he can only go get SJ after SJ’s made the deals, because otherwise it’s a paradox, and he wouldn’t exist.

So SQQ brings home limbless, post-torture!SJ. That’s where the fic starts.

By all accounts, the deals are squared: SJ no longer has cultivation and SJ died in SY’s dimension, so SY successfully exists. SJ and SY can exist in the same space totally fine, and SJ begins healing.

(Currently, the fic is completely from SJ’s POV, and very much about coming to terms with being saved and what the hell is going on in this better world.)

The trouble is, SY doesn’t know what’s going to happen when SJ meets YQY again. SJ very thoroughly declines the offer to go see YQY because part of SJ still believes this whole thing is a trick, and if he goes to see YQY he’ll ruin his end of the bargain and YQY will die again. For SY’s part, he’s afraid of SJ going to see YQY too for similar but opposite reasons—if SJ going to see YQY ruins SJ’s end of the bargain, then wouldn’t that mean SY can no longer exist? Would SY just disappear from this universe?

So we get ragtag group therapy fun times. SJ thinks this is probably all an illusion Xin Mo is tricking him with, so treats everything with scorn but also existential apathy. This actually works to his benefit because he’s not clinging to things as hard, and it’s easier for him to admit, for example, that he was definitely in the wrong for abusing LBH, and yeah he was being a spiteful bitch when he did not need to be.

SY tries to keep LBH away from SJ mostly, because c’mon, he’s not about to make his darling husband face his childhood abuser. He does explain the situation to LBH though, in the same terms that Bingge had (mis)understood it lmfao—that the act of saving LQG’s life had prompted an entire 180 on his personality so he came out of the spirit caves a better man. LBH’s jealous as fuck of course, but damn if that doesn’t explain some things. Given the opportunity to see his old and new Shizun side-by-side, LBH takes it, and really gets a moment to see how horribly he’s been treated by SQQ.

So it actually prompts some therapy between SY and LBH too. LBH used to figure that getting pushed into the Abyss was squared by SQQ sacrificing himself to save him. But ofc it turned out SQQ came back and kept on, in his perspective, trying to get away from him. Trying to leave him behind. SQQ’s tried to treat his abandonment issues by going “okay sorry about that I’ll never leave you behind again” but he’s never really explained it.

SJ’s presence gives Binghe the ability to ask the question again and gives SY an answer: shame and cowardice. They’re able to put SJ’s mistreatment of Binghe right in front of them and SY-as-SQQ gets to explain how much it hurt to look back on that bit of their past, but also how much he feared LBH's retaliation. LBH is a little hurt, but also he remembers how he’d raped SQQ under Xin Mo’s control and, looking at what’s left of SJ now, he sees his own darkest possibilities. He really did destroy the man he loves now in another timeline. That helps him contextualize SY’s fears and why SY chose to push him off the cliff.

LQG crashlands into the middle of this whole party as is his wont. He gets a little fix-it too maybe. SY very staunchly repeats the reason for his personality swap—saving LQG in that cave made him a Better Person™. Meeting the original goods again, LQG is forced to believe it. Or like, it doesn’t really matter to him either way, but now he really does see pre-cave SQQ and post-cave SQQ as two completely different people.

SJ though, has to swallow this really weird pill. He remembers trying to save LQG inside the cave but failing, and then getting blamed for LQG’s death. If he’d succeeded, he and LQG would’ve become...this close?? A life debt between them would’ve changed his outlook on life so much???

Well whatever. Now that he’s put down all his old posturing, he more readily gives his reasons for why LQG gets on his nerves so much: the insufferable confidence (arrogant prick), the skills to back it up (privileged bastard), and a flawless cultivator family with all the money and the training and the pedigree. (Meanwhile SY’s like “oh shit that’s me too hahahahah awkward, good thing he still thinks i’m him so he doesn’t just murder me immediately.)

LQG’s a little weirded out too. SY-as-SQQ is his favorite person in the world, so it’s hard to get angry at SJ-as-SQQ since they’re “the same person.” He’s more willing to talk all this out with SJ and brings up all their old beef on his side too: high-handed snootiness coupled with underhanded dick moves, also the whole sleeping-with-prostitutes thing hurting Cang Qiong’s reputation. Ofc they’re snapping at each other this whole time. “There’s no reason for you to do all that!”

SY intervenes if needed. “Actually there is.” Considering the fact that SJ gets indicted for so many things that actually turn out to be not his fault, SY figures he’ll just get it out there. “Remember Qiu Haitang’s accusations against me? I grew up a slave in that household. I grew up believing it was kill or be killed—it doesn’t make sabotaging others right, but...that’s why the Spirit Caves made such an impression on me. I learned it wasn’t just kill or be killed, I can also save people. It opened my eyes to everything I already had, and everything I should be grateful for.”

This is for both LQG and SJ. And it works, to some degree. SJ knows he managed to claw to the top of privilege, but he still felt horribly insecure there. That’s because, he realizes, he never got the thing that would actually grant him security. It's not power or money or reputation—it’s Qi-ge. Holy hell he misses Qi-ge. In anger and betrayal, he’d pushed YQY continuously out of his life, but when faced with certain death the only regret he actually had was bringing Qi-ge down with him. YQY was meant to have survived, and in this world, he did.

So now, after all that, SJ really, really wants to go see his Qi-ge. It’s nice to have survived (and gotten part of his power back—at the very beginning, SY gives one of SQQ’s eyes to SJ as a bit of his golden core in order to save SJ’s life), but it’s so damn hard to live on in this world knowing YQY is only so far away, still very deeply attached to Xiao Jiu.

They try to Cyrano it at first. SY-as-SQQ goes to YQY with SJ’s voice in his ear, telling SY how to treat YQY as him. YQY is so fucking touched and hopeful, and SY is damn uncomfortable. He goes running back to SJ and says it’s not going to work—it’s not going to work because he’s no longer Qi-ge’s Xiao Jiu. He’s Luo Binghe’s husband, okay? He can’t go back to YQY as SJ.

SJ’s fucking furious at first (what kind of shitty variation of himself saves LQG’s life and then falls out of love with Qi-ge???? bitch?????) but what can he do? LQG tells them YQY’s on his way here and SJ hides for now. They still don’t know what will happen if SJ meets YQY, so SY continues to front as SJ for now.

But during this conversation, something changes. Maybe YQY says something, but SJ realizes he’s actually a little willing to take this chance. If Qi-ge does disappear—easy, he’d just kill himself right after. He’d already experienced Qi-ge’s death twice before, and at least this time, he can follow, knowing he’s at least reconciled with Qi-ge through SY.

And if he disappears on his own, then at least he knows there’s a world in which Qi-ge does not die horribly. That’s enough for him.

That, however, leaves the very last possibility—that SY will disappear. At this point both LQG and LBH have figured this out, and are very, very reluctant to let this be the scenario. They don’t see it as two people, they see it as their version of SQQ vs. YQY’s version of SQQ.

So there’s a little tension, but in the end, SY gets the final choice. As soon as he learns SJ is willing to go see YQY, he chooses that path. He simply owes qijiu too much to deny them the possibility of reconciliation. So despite knowing he might disappear from Binghe and LQG’s life, he makes it happen.

(They should get a very painful goodbye scene.)

SY goes out to explain things. “Zhangmen-shixiong may have noticed my change since my qi deviation and the spirit caves.” “I’m happy Xiao Jiu has a brighter outlook on life.” “Yes, but I think Qi-ge, of all people, might actually prefer how I was before, right?” “If Xiao Jiu’s happy, I’m happy.” “Yes, but Shen Jiu wants you. Is that alright?” “—of course. I want Xiao Jiu too—”

SJ comes out. Everyone holds their breath.

Scene cut.

It’s said that Cang Qiong’s Sect Leader Yue Qingyuan disappeared suddenly one afternoon...

But jk, YQY just ran away with SJ, they’re recuperating in the mountains and everybody’s fine and it’s a happy ending.

[jameslovships]

if you're still looking for kathony prompts, kathony post engagement but pre-wedding anthony being needy+horny for kate because violet,daphne,mary,and edwina hog up all her time with wedding prep and meanwhile kate doesn't get it because he keeps insisting he wont fall in love with her so why is he being so grumpy about her being busy?

Anon, hey! thank you so much for this prompt, i really enjoyed writing this. hope i’ve somehow done my fave ship justice. 

The candid chatter of the Bridgerton clan was blasted at full pelt with Kate inundated with wedding prep and Violet leading the charge. Kate towered over her 'subjects' like a spectacle as the drawing room was brimming with excited female gossip overlapping with each other.

Violet refused to work within the ambit of subtle, for fear, that her dear eldest, might change his mind.

He was often guilty of not keeping his word.

Violet would be damned if she'd let Anthony cause a ruckus and call the entire thing off. She was dead set on not allowing the spirit of cold feet to linger and rip apart this dream, namely hers, to see her eldest wed. After all, she had seen off the splendid wedding that was the Duke and Duchess.

It was only natural that Anthony would now follow suit, despite his objections. Violet wasn't too sure how long Anthony would be amenable to the prospect of marriage so there was a need to pre-empt things before the whole thing would snowball.

After all, it was surely something Edward would have wanted, had he been alive to bear witness.  

It was common knowledge to the Ton and Violet herself that Anthony was of marriageable age, not the marriageable type.

His trysts, who were relatively low in class and their identities obscured, were subject to the impalement of his appendage but in Anthony's mind, commitment would not marry well with desire. Desire dies and all that one is left with the stale taste of committing to a woman that one doesn't absolutely and desperately yearn for.

Commitment was not this budding desire he felt for his betrothed as described by his sister, the Duchess, but he wrangled with this impassioned but unknown feeling of burning in between his legs. It clawed its way up his wide chest and flushed out his face.

His appendage would balloon in rapid spurts and tighten the gaps in his tailored trousers leaving little time and room to release.

The release of this invisible grip was not the catharsis that his hands or his passion needed. 

He needed something warmer. 

But it grew impossible to curb such unexplained feelings as each time his ears caught wind of her soft laughter or the innocent dagger of her brown eyes, his appendage would grow more inflamed and more needy.

He'd become even more riled up, even more irritant.

Still, Violet buzzed - unrelenting, in her pursuit of drowning Kate's melanated body in an ivory-lace bodice. It was ill practice for a husband to be a witness to the wedding grown his bride was to wear, but Anthony did not submit to authority or rules. He broke most, if not, all of them.

His union with Kate was a mere example of the dissenter that he was, breaking the unspoken rule because that same desire starved them both until they caved.

Anthony sat slouched in his desk chair, bourbon stained on his lips and his glass tattooed to his hand. He swirled its contents, before bringing the rim closer to his lips.

Her voice, though soft, hit him like a pelt as it travelled.

He heard her.

She had been pulled in every direction but his.

She had been inundated with immaterial wedding details but had been sheltered away from the man she was to be promised to.

Anthony despised this madness and sought to put an end the matter.

The door hung ajar but the aghast faces of Violet, Mary, Daphne, Edwina and Eloise swung at the unwelcomed intruder. Kate had been drowned out, she hadn't yet noticed the unannounced arrival of her betrothed but Anthony's appendage did.

It writhed and wrangled as he shook his right leg to fend off any curious eyes that might have noticed its growth.

It was obvious to the naked eye. 

Violet's voice sounded firm coupled with a tapered smile as the Bridgerton clan cornered Kate to prevent Anthony's insatiable eyes from bearing witness to the dress Kate had chosen, "Anthony! How may we help you, dear?"

Anthony took a deep step into the drawing room, his shoulders pinned back as he rolled his lip, "Am I not permitted to pay my bride a visit, Mother?"

Violet shot back the accusation with a pin laugh, "You may do as you wish but we're still inundated with wedding prep"

Anthony's ears grew hot as his chest felt vexed, "Whatever is left to do, Mother? Kate has been in your company since noontide"

"Wedding gowns require a thorough vetting process, my dear" Violet said, trying to placate him.

"Is there such a need Mother when the damn thing shall be ripped come Sunday?" Anthony's lips were tight and his tone was curt.

Soft female chatter then descended into a collective gasp as Anthony had become emboldened and departed from speaking with the grace he was known for.

"Permit me, Lady Bridgerton, if I may speak with my betrothed for a moment?"

Violet assented, and it was then, only then - that the growl of lust punctured Anthony's chest as Kate met his eyes for the first time. His eyes, wolfish in colour and scent, lingered at every facet of her body and skin, unable to focus.

He had a yearning to rip it all and suck wherever he could. 

His appendage writhed loudly, damn the bondage of lust.  

"Anthony?" Kate's voice came out like a hushed whisper, "Your insistence isn't gentlemanly, my lord"

Anthony's eyes grew dark and dirty, "I have never professed to be a gentleman"

"So you say but on the contrary, you've shown yourself to be one, at times" Kate rebutted.

"Kate, I assure you that I am anything but a gentleman especially in the marital bed"

Kate's mouth hung open, his words were so bold and inviting. 

But Anthony wouldn't ever want or love her so this insistence for her didn't seem logical.

He made that very much clear, even if she wanted to forget, she couldn't.

"Am I permitted to steal you?"

Kate opted for formal, "Mr. Bridgerton - "

Anthony winced at the address, "Anthony, I'm sure you mean but do carry on"

Kate continued, "I'm inundated with wedding prep - "

Anthony scoffed, as a stern smile crept in, "I'm sure such affairs can wait, Kate. More to point, a gown and a bodice should suffice? What else does a bride need to prepare that warrants time away from her betrothed?" 

Kate had noticed the growl in Anthony's words, even if the rest of his face didn't paint the picture that he felt indignant.

Kate didn't mince her words, as she said acustatorially, "The basis of our impending marriage is not love or devotion therefore if I may my lord, neither of us are obliged by God or by law to spend more time together before we wed. We shall have plenty opportunities to do such come Sunday"

Anthony grew hot and almost untameable as Kate shuffled back into the female chatter.

He yearned for her in a way that wasn't healthy.

He dreamt of her brown locks and the heights and planes of her skin.

His insatiable need to conquer every part of her lithe form ravaged him.

Kate didn't understand, how could she?

Anthony found himself, shooting back glass of bourbon, still stuck on autopilot.

Sunday seemed way too far to demonstrate patience. 

[hellpark]

GREGORY: I don’t quite like the wording of these questions I’m reading in Craig’s little virtual post box.

GREGORY: But lest he tries to foolishly answer questions not best suited for him, I will step in I suppose.

GREGORY: It’s clear he’s made a fine job of telling you all about my friends and I.

GREGORY: Or, quite possibly the very narrow light of which he’s seen us in at least.

GREGORY: Which is to say, he’s probably described us all rather poorly.

GREGORY: It is true, both Pip and Thomas both are nothing but kindhearted individuals.

GREGORY: Both have had their share of bullying, misfortune, and untimely deaths.

GREGORY: I’d say Pip’s I can relate to more, but Thomas’ just upsets me a great deal.

GREGORY: Not to rank either of their tribulations, I just believe I have a better grasp of exactly why Pip didn’t end up in heaven.

GREGORY: He’s had eight years to explain it to me, after all.

GREGORY: And so I will attempt to explain it to you all though what he has told me over the years.

GREGORY: They both deserve to have their stories told the correct way, and not however it would have been explained by the doltish owner of this weblog.

GREGORY: To start, I believe Pip started up in heaven.

GREGORY: Though, he never made it through the pearly gates, which is what truly grants you a pleasant and bright eternal afterlife.

GREGORY: Once you make it through that barrier, the only way you’re doomed is if you cause religious mishap, or truly gain some sort of evil intent.

GREGORY: Of course, this is only the Christian afterlife we’re speaking of.

GREGORY: And seeing that I’m possibly talking to possibly a baker’s dozen of strangers over the internet right now, I’d like to state that I have no outer knowledge of the afterlives of any religion other than my own.

GREGORY: I can say with certainty that a Christian hell is not the greatest source of outside knowledge, as much as it has progressed down there.

GREGORY: I feel as though these stories would be entirely different if the two had been risen under different minded households, so please spare some judgement on my part if this seems rather one sided of me to speak of.

GREGORY: So again, I am sharing only what I’ve been told of, and under a Christian mindset.

GREGORY: My intent is not to nullify any other afterlife, only to elaborate on my friends and I’s.

GREGORY: ...

GREGORY: I honestly forgot where I was.

GREGORY: ...Ah, yes.

GREGORY: Pip’s hellish status.

GREGORY: As I stated, once you make it through those heavenly gates, you’re officially a resident of the eternal life in the sky.

GREGORY: Normally, unless you are turned away for sneaky wrongdoings not seen through the watchful eyes of heaven, there is no issue getting in.

GREGORY: And for someone like Pip, the prior shouldn’t ever have been an issue.

GREGORY: All the time I’ve ever known of him-- through life and death-- is that he is kind, generous, and rarely wears a frown.

GREGORY: He gives his pleases and thanks, and he rarely acts unjust.

GREGORY: From the times he’s told me that he has, even those instances sound rather just.

GREGORY: My time knowing him alive wasn’t all too long, but a year or so before he had gone missing, never to be seen again.

GREGORY: He doesn’t like to talk about his own death very much, but from what I can tell it was certainly during a time of travesty.

GREGORY: And during such times, the gates can get overwhelmed and swollen with other unfortunate cases.

GREGORY: Certainly, everybody at their untimely death could not wait to see their afterlife.

GREGORY: Some sorrowful, some full of hope that the worst of it all was over.

GREGORY: From how he described it, Pip was more on the latter side of the crowd.

GREGORY: And so imagine...

GREGORY: When you think it’s all over.

GREGORY: When you think life has finally given you a break, and you’re able to move onto a better one...

GREGORY: That even up in heaven, there’s still nobody that cares enough about you.

GREGORY: A simple break in the clouds due to deceased overpopulation.

GREGORY: Nobody turns their heads.

GREGORY: Nobody thinks to look behind them and see what they’ve been ever so gently pushing back over their greed of a happy afterlife.

GREGORY: And greed is a sin, mind you.

GREGORY: So they just continue to shuffle their feet and wait for their now undeserved turn into heaven.

GREGORY: And the wings you sprout after death are there for your tiring travel upwards.

GREGORY: It’s an exhausting journey to heaven, your new wings wont fly you a second time until you’ve reached your destination completely.

GREGORY: So if you’re denied entry before you can make it through, there’s no real way to fly back up until it’s far too late.

GREGORY: In life, Pip was never destined to go to hell.

GREGORY: In death, he still was not destined to go to hell.

GREGORY: But look at where the carelessness of others have brought him.

GREGORY: Where life can be cruel, death can be just as much so.

GREGORY: ...Though...

GREGORY: Sometimes, while life and death may both sow their unjust seeds... a lot of what normally decides where you end up is your own actions in life, of course.

GREGORY: Thomas of course was nothing but a sweetheart.

GREGORY: From what he’s told me, though he couldn’t go to a church publicly due to his developed anxiety over his Tourette’s, he always made up for it by watching church service with his mother at home. 

GREGORY: Every single Sunday, he told me.

GREGORY: Though like some people, especially in more depressing periods of their life, he began to question his faith.

GREGORY: There came a point where he didn’t know what he should truly believe in.

GREGORY: He never did anything wrong, as he always listened and obeyed the strict followings of Catholicism.

GREGORY: And though he was many things most extreme Christians would call sinful, he still would choose to believe, all that time.

GREGORY: In the end, none of what he was would have ever sent him to hell.

GREGORY: He truly is just too innocent and nice of a person.

GREGORY: Though sometimes, after traumatic experiences in life, it can kick your belief system like a switch.

GREGORY: After loss, it can be hard to believe.

GREGORY: And apparently loss for Thomas meant cutting out an entire part of his life that he had believed for fifteen years beforehand.

GREGORY: “How can you believe in a god if it feels like you’re only on Earth to suffer?”

GREGORY: It truly hurt my heart to hear him tell me the way he felt.

GREGORY: But in the end, it made sense why he was in hell.

GREGORY: Attaching yourself to faith for so long, believing in a god, then ditching a life worth’s of devotion in an instant.

GREGORY: That’s what truly damned him to hell.

GREGORY: In the end it was only that loss of faith that flipped his destiny upside down.

GREGORY: For a while, he was in such a state of grieving, you knew you were still in hell.

GREGORY: Hell isn’t what he believed it to be anymore, of course.

GREGORY: Most of us had grown used to it, and even enjoyed the new era we were living in.

GREGORY: But it still stung for him.

GREGORY: Only in hell could you still hear the wallowing of the afterlife.

GREGORY: And of course, he only blamed himself.

GREGORY: He did two things that society said would damn him to hell.

GREGORY: But only one of them was what really did it.

GREGORY: Of course he didn’t realise this.

GREGORY: He sobbed for what felt like weeks, because he thought that the way he died... was what sent him here.

GREGORY: We would constantly reassure him that the means of his death did not attribute to his afterlife.

GREGORY: We even had him talk to the Devil himself-- of which we’re fortunate friends of.

GREGORY: He, too, could only assure Thomas that it was not the way he died, but the way he chose to squander his faith.

GREGORY: It’s a harsh reality, and it’s unclear if he grasps it fully, even after a full year and a half.

GREGORY: I’ve always thought that if he had someone in life to help steer him in a better direction, he wouldn’t have gone out the way he did, nor would he have been sent to hell.

GREGORY: His ex certainly never did any good for him.

GREGORY: Even if Thomas claims his ex was the best thing in his life.

GREGORY: How could someone like that be the best thing in your life if they let you fall this far down a rabbit hole?

GREGORY: Thomas truly is as ignorant as he is pitiful.

GREGORY: We’re full of experiences that Stan and his friends would never, ever grasp.

GREGORY: I can’t believe this is a question that needed to be elaborated upon.

GREGORY: But if I’m not answering them, that fool of a man Craig would be instead.

GREGORY: I’m sure he’d paint Pip and Thomas both as monsters here.

GREGORY: But I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen.

[themechaneer]

Pocket!Muse Headcanons ! ! !

Your muse only they’re a teeny tiny pocket pet! List as many headcanons as you like than tag others to spread the cuteness!

J o e l

Fantastic starter breed for any potential handler! Sweet, affectionate, curious, & caring!

Can be a solitary breed if handler is regularly available to devote time to them but if not is prone to loneliness & must have at least 1 playmate or more (experts reccomend no more than 6 due to temperment)

Pairs extremely well with Pocket!Kai, though it is common for the two to plot and make mischief together when they’re bored so keep an eye on them!

Warning: can have a temper! While generally even-keeled, he does get grumpy at times and sad even more often. He requires alone time in these moods. Bring him a snack and some puzzle pieces and let him work it out by himself.

Is generally a gentle breed but again be mindful of the occasional temper. Especially if your pocket!Joel is injured. Phyiscal pain or duress tends to bring it out. He may even go so far as to bite playmates or his handler if touched while hurt. He doesn’t mean it, he’s just in pain & will likely apologize later by way of trying to tend to the bites he gave himself. Can also come out when he is overtired or distressed.

Is actually quite the little caretaker and will often be the one to patch up and comfort playmates if they’re hurt during play.

LOVES puzzles & tinkering with things. Sometimes carries around a piece of one he’s working on just to think about it while he does other things. Highly reccomend getting him miniture model car kits for him to build!

Extremely protective. If you are worried about security in your home or the safety of playmates, the pocket!Joel is an excellent choice.

He’s also big enough to break up fights if you have breeds that don’t get along or he has playmates that are prone to disagreements.

If threatened, will growl first and bite second. Be aware that unlike other breeds, the pocket!Joel can cause serious damage due to being one of the bigger breeds. If he feels playmates are threatened wont give warnings. He’ll simply attack.

Show him new things and/or take him adventuring often and he will adore you.

Excellent traveling pocket!muse for commuters, especially those who travel through dangerous neighborhoods or late at night. The pocket!Joel has been known to shred and mutilate anything he can get at on those who threaten his Handler. Just make sure he’s tucked away somewhere he can see out and ambush unwanted fingers properly and you need never carry mace again!

Does not keep a regular sleep cycle. This is normal. Do NOT try to enforce a bedtime on pocket!Joel. Simply allow him to rest when and how he likes. Rarely nests but will often snuggle up on his handler’s pillow or with playmates.

Most important of all: the pocket!Joel is very empathetic. Highly emotional households may not be the best environment as it will cause him anxiety & he will make himself sick trying to fix everything. Alternatively, those with behavioral or mental illnesses or with other pocket!Muses that are tempermental will find their pocket!Joel to be extremely sensitive to their needs.

Tagged by: Snagged it from my old blog cause I needed something to make me smile today! Tagging: @himncskur , @exsanguinatedserenity , @khirurg , @kenneld , @celestieu , @otlaw , @godenvy (Kate) , @strnza , @sunbentsky (Jess) , @doctorgunning , @svnsworn (for Ichika or Takeru), @urodyne LITERALLY EVERYONE?? Like please? This is such a cute prompt I promise it will make you smile if you see this on your dash take it as permission to do it and tag me so I can read your headcanons!!!

~ MORE MUSES BELOW THE CUT SINCE THIS IS ALREADY GETTING LONG ~

K a i

Not for beginners! This breed is and will always be half-wild. Requires a firm hand and lots of patience.

Plays rough. Keep an eye on him around gentler/softer playmates as he can sometimes hurt when he doesn’t mean to. Don’t be surprised to see pocket!Joel issue a corrective bite to your pocket!Kai if you happen to have one. This is normal & not meant to hurt so much as scold.

Will bat around his smaller playmates, & rough house with bigger playmates, but will also completely maul any hand that tries to actually harm them.

Do not attempt to brush the hair. It’s supposed to look like a fresh from bed mess and you will lose chunks from your fingers trying to ‘fix’ it.

Very vocal! You need never guess at what he wants. If he needs something, you and everyone in the home will hear about it.

If you have cleavage, that will be his favorite spot to snuggle. Even if you don’t put him there, he will find his way. Also enjoys viewing the world from this vantage point.

In that same vein, be aware that this breed wanders! Do not be alarmed if you find him in random cupboards, atop impossibly tall objects, etc. Those with weak hearts may want to look into a different companion if suddenly spotting a tiny Kai in unexpected places will cause too much stress.

This breed is prone to FOMO (fear of missing out) & will try to fight ‘bedtime’.

If you want to put him to sleep the best way is to snuggle him down in a pile of playmates and let their sleepiness infect him.

Snuggles anything within reach and will latch on like a tiny octopus. Often tries to bring these things with him when he goes exploring, even when it leads to him huffing and upset. If he tugs you to follow, humoring him will win major points.

Swaggers when he walks. This may be adorable, but if you giggle he will pout.

Feeds off attention from both Handler and playmates. The more the merrier!

Can get sulky and throw temper tantrums if he feels he’s being ignored by his handler in favor of other playmates for too long.

On that note pocket!Kai is not a solitary breed and does require at least one playmate to remain happy & healthy, experts reccomend pocket!Joel as this breed tends to stabalize tiny Kai’s more hyperactive and mischevious nature.

Has temper flares far more often than pocket!Joel and while they burn brighter they also burn out far faster. Most often caused by strife in the home and overcharged moods.

Explorer breed! Will investigate every inch of your home probably within the first day and begin begging for excursions outside. Such adventures are relatively safe as long as he’s accompanied. 

He will, at times, wander off for fun, but he’s not a runner. As long as he knows where home is, he’ll always come back.

Loves tattoos. Will stroke them and stare with big eyes until they’ve been explained to him.

Loves to doodle. Give him paper and a little shard of graphite or pebble of charcoal and he will return to you with incredible art. Putting these on the fridge will make him beam for days.

Likes smooches a lot. If he manages to clamber up to reach your face, you will receive a smooch.

C a s e y

Very zen. Unflappable. A great companion for pocket!Remy, or any breed, really.

Hugs are life. He’ll hug playmates, he’ll hug handlers, he’ll hug strangers; he don’t give a fuck.

Invest in Legos. Be prepared to witness marvelous structures appearing around your home.

Thrives in large groups of friends! He tends to mother playmates, especially ones that do not take care of themselves or are prone to trouble.

Loves swimming! A home aquarium is an excellent addition to his habitat. Hiding little treasures in it for him to find is even better.

If feeling confused or threatened, will make himself seem bigger and growl a lot. if prssed further expect blood from bites. If Handler or playmates are at all threatened this breed goes for the eyes first.

Great for a household with lots of interpersonal strife. He is a natural peacemaker and has a knack for bringing people what they want.

Will try to sweet his way out of things if he does something naughty or that he was not supposed to. Not mischevious per say but playful and prone to getting into things.

An excellent pet for children, especially those with anxiety or fears of the dark. He is both cuddle bud and can make nightlights & is an excellent storyteller.

Very, very, very much enjoys being in a group. Playmates are required! He may seem shy or wary of them at first, but he needs the sense of community to flourish.

Another highly empathic breed that pairs well with homes in need of sensitive pets. Tends to dote on playmates and Handlers.

Fascinated by fixing broken things and by things that grow. Will tend houseplants if Handler forgets and often cleans up broken glass or crumbs before anyone else can.

Bath time is best time. Bath toys are love. Especially boats he can ride.

R e m y

Will make her own dresses or tailor doll dresses. She may not always be able to walk in these. That’s not the point.

Will fluff and coo if you compliment her dress-up.

Likes symmetry and will straighten things like crooked picture frames. Very helpful with housework and loves party prep!

If you have several playmates, put her in charge of dispensing food. She flourishes in groups, especially at mealtimes, and is happiest sitting with her playmates while they eat.

Loves things that smell good. Perfume, incense, freshly-done laundry, etc. She will try to snuggle up with whatever it is and get the scent all over her.

Can be very bossy to both Handler and playmates. Sternness will not work in this case as it will just make her more stubborn. If she wants something she should not have, negotiation and compromise are your best bets.

Provide her plenty of soft things to construct her nest! Do not be surprised if it is simpler than her outfits.

Will pick wildflowers if allowed outside. Usually has to carry them one at a time.

Pls do not panic if you wake up showered in flower petals. She just loves you & wants to share what she loves with you.

Is a little gossip and pays v close attention to people's behavior. Do NOT bring her around your crush she will be playing matchmaker in two seconds flat.

If well-treated, she will be a model pocket!muse, but if mistreated she can turn a happy home into a hellscape almost single-handedly.

If there is no alpha personality in the household, she will assume the role. If there is and they’re legit about it, she will be perfectly content to listen to them.

Bites hard when unhappy.

Bites hard when happy.

Extremely territorial, of home, handler, and playmates. New people should be introduced to her slowly and in a neutral setting.

Another extremely vocal breed. If she needs something you and potentially your neighbors will know about it.

Will sleep on your bookshelves.

Will also reorganize said bookshelves. It doesn’t matter that some of the books are bigger than her. She is determined.

Books are love. Give her some once in a while and prepare to be gently nipped and kissed anywhere she can reach!

Likes to keep busy but often forgets to eat. 

Will sometimes lash out if confronted directly, but responds well to gentle nudging (i.e. leaving food within arm’s reach until the smell draws her out).

Nocturnal by choice, not nature.

Often carries pointy things hidden on her. Only uses them on legitimate threats.

Does well as a solitary pet but thrives with playmates. 

Can be somewhat antisocial some days but will often take particularly naive or hapless playmates under her wing. Beware her teaching style can sometimes look like she’s being a bit mean.

Surly & Sweet.