#HE DID THE 4S FUCK YEAH

[witchwhaat]

okay i'm back, men's fs part three 😳

[korncest]

FILL HER UP AND LEAVE HER DUMB!

SIREN IS TYPING! | FINALLY! PISS FIC IS OUT! i wanted to apologize for taking sosososo long for putting it out, ive been juggling college and writer’s block HORRIBLY >< i’ve written this like 101380203 times and i guess this one is the least mediocre one.. thank you to my babe pillsy & pups for proof reading this and dealing with the fact ive written this like a million times now.. 6.5k words!

WARNINGS! | NSFW! PISS! URINE! PEE! leon will be pissing while he’s balls deep so if you don’t fw piss do not read! don’t! torture! yourself! age gaps, leon isn’t like? the best person? gross, sleazy, i guess! damnation leon is in his mid thirties, reader is in her early twenties, dumbification, semi-public sex? bar bathroom drunk sex, sloppy fucking, creampie, mediocre orgasm cuz leon is gross and only really cared about himself, clit playing, etc etc idk

SYNOPSIS! | damnation! leon kennedy x bimbo! reader — bar hook ups are rare when you’re in your thirties and go to sport bars filled with men, but when a pretty face comes in wearing the sluttiest outfit and doesn’t have a thought in her brain, leon knew he needed to get in a quick fuck. but after a full night of nursing whiskey, he can’t help his bladder filling up mid fuck!

dim lights, chatter, and old men — that’s what this bar was. 

so why were you here? 

leon was surprised, pretty girls like you don’t come around to places like these often.

look at you! dressed in the sluttiest crop top and skirt you could find. were you stupid? coming to a bar filled with gross middle aged men dressed like that? it was like you were asking for trouble. 

leon had been seated at the bar, staring down at his glass blankly, mind fuzzy and blurry while his face stayed void of emotion. he had been on autopilot, maybe if he was at another bar he would be doing something else— but that was empty wishful thinking, once a sip of alcohol enters his system his mind blanks. a way to cope, simply. that was the intention tonight. but that’s when you came in — practically skipping to the bar and taking the empty seat next to him. 

he had glanced over at you, a thoughtless action, but when he saw you, he was pleasantly surprised by what he saw. 

you were cute, sitting up with perfect posture, your tits practically spilling out of your shirt while you stared at the bartender with sparkling eyes, and you were sitting next to him? god must’ve heard his prayers and thrown him a bone. 

he kept a sly gaze on you while you ordered, watching you bat your eyelashes at the bartender while you ordered, biting your glossy lips in thought while you leaned against the counter. leon felt envious of the bartender, as he stood on the other side of the bar, he must be getting a nice look down your low-cut shirt. asshole. 

as you ordered, leon expected to hear you order something fruity, a frozen piña colada or whatever younger girls like you liked, but leon’s eyebrows raised in amusement once he heard your order. “uhh, can i have a cola? thank you!” you said, sounding so eager, leon’s brain reeled, did you really just ask for a soda? at a bar? are you stupid? the bartender simply nodded and turned away from you. you smiled dumbly and shifted in your seat, pulling your denim skirt down to cover your thighs. barely. you pulled out your phone, a cute iphone 4s with a hot pink cover, it suited you. 

moving to grip his glass, leon pulled it to his lips before he took a long swig of the drink, a small breath leaving his lips as he put the glass back.

“if you wanted a soda you could’ve gone to circle-k, you know?” leon said, turning his head to face you, a lazy smirk curling at his lips. 

your head perked up, and looking over at him, you smiled dumbly. “yeah! but, like, i wanted an excuse to go out! but alcohol is so gross.” you replied, a small laugh leaving your lips as you turned your body to face him fully, leon let out a low hum. “so, you decided to get all dressed up and go to a bar.. just to get a soda? c’mon, at least get a drink.” leon pressed, glancing over at the bartender before looking back at you. “it’s part of the bar experience, sweetheart.” he said, waving his hand in a swift moment as he spoke, you squirmed in your seat, biting your bottom lip, “mmm, i don’t know.. what do you think i’d like?” 

leaning back against his stool, leon let out a small laugh, “i don’t know, sweetheart. a strawberry margarita? you like strawberries, yeah? it’s a nice fruity drink, something you can handle.” he nodded, watching as the bartender slid over a glass of soda. 

taking the glass, you moved it over to your lips, popping the red straw into your mouth before taking a sip. “are you gonna buy it for me?” you teased, batting your eyelashes up at him before you crossed your legs. huffing, leon let out a small laugh, “what’s in it for me?” did you really think you could drain his wallet and not give him anything in return? c’mon.

“uhm.. you’d make me, like, super happy,” you said, a smile curling on your lips as he stared at him. 

“as pretty as your smile is i’m gonna need something more.” he said, you’re already smiling, why would he pay ten bucks to see you smile more? sure, he had the money, but did he want to give it? nah. 

“aww,” you whined, “okay, you can get anything you want, mister!” you caved, voice high pitched and cheery. “but, like, as long as it’s not like, i don’t know..wanting my organs or something, i can totally give it to you!” you said, giving him a playful wink. were you being serious? anything? c’mon, that was just too easy, a small smirk curled on his lips at your words, anything?

letting out a breath through his nose, leon crossed his arms over his chest, his leather jacket squeaking at the movement. 

“you’re way too eager, sweetheart. you’ll end up in the wrong hands if you continue like that.” he said, moving his head to the side and shifting in his seat, pushing his hips forward, his thighs spreading slightly. manspreading like any other guy at the bar, but your eager eyes flickered down to his pants, watching as the denim fabric curled on his lap.

a spark of thought hit you, your thighs clenched together as a small laugh left your lips, your head moved to the side and you waved his words off. 

“c’mon, mister, i’m a big girl— i can toootally handle myself!” you giggled, moving your finger to curl around your hair. 

leon let out a hum, not believing a word you said. 

“yeah? you can?” he mused, he knew you didn’t.

you nodded though, perking up on your chair, arching your back slightly to keep your posture upright and your tits pushed out. leon took a glance, leopard print shirt that barely fit and a push up bra, your tits were squeezed together in a full display. were you good at tit jobs? with a rack like that, he sure hoped you were.

“well, duh! i’m like, super good at handling myself, mister!” you rebutted, putting your hands on your hips as you hit the power pose, trying to prove your point. 

“leon,” he said, your head tilted to the side, “leon?” you asked stupidly. 

“that’s my name.”

“ohh.”

you were real cute, but damn, you were real stupid too. 

it didn’t take a scientist to figure it out, fuck, look at you. 

you stared at leon like a puppy— a stupid puppy look. not a single worry behind your dumb little eyes, you believed the world was at the palm of your hand, and it probably was. from the stories you told him you were nothing more than daddy’s princess, one pout, and dear old dad was pulling out his checkbook and writing off a fat check with how much money you asked for. he was even paying for your apartment, you had it nice, no need to study or learn, daddy’s inheritance would cover any of your worries. 

you reminded him of ashley, like a far memory, but ashley was a sweetheart. a smart girl, but you? you were just spoiled and stupid, he didn’t mind though, he could easily deal with you if he wanted to. 

leon noticed how you stared at him when he spoke, wide doe eyes focused on him intently like he was the messiah while you were nothing more than an apostle, like the words that slipped from his tongue were the route to salvation. it was silly, he was just some guy in his thirties, buzzed, and in a bar— were you one of those girls that were into that? the cute bimbos that wanted nothing more than a taste of cock from guys over half their age? probably, he’s already caught you sneaking glances at his pants, each shift and adjustment had your eyes glued to his crotch, thinking you were being slick. 

god, what a cock hungry whore. 

he had noted that as he spoke, you would nod along to his words with such eagerness, it made him wonder if you were even listening to him. 

c’mon, his mundane stories weren’t that interesting, maybe if he was honest about his job then he could understand why you seemed so interested, but he was sure if he uttered a single word about the undead the government would have his head. a red little glow dot resting against his forehead and that would be the end of leon scott kennedy. 

the government blew up an entire city with the infected and innocents without care to preserve their image. after all, one more life wouldn’t worry them. well, maybe his, leon’s the president’s lap dog after all—

nonetheless, those were secrets he wasn’t going to share with a nice pair of tits. you probably wouldn’t even understand.

you spoke a lot, with a cute little valley girl accent, the words like and totally were practically engraved into your vocabulary. If leon took a shot everytime you said any of the words he would’ve died of alcohol poisoning. 

the more you spoke, the more leon realized you didn’t have a sense of safety, it was almost funny. why did he know what high school you went to? what state were you born in? what your favorite doll growing up was? you had just met him and you were letting him in on all your secrets, like that one time you ran over the neighbor's mailbox and fled the scene immediately after, then playing the innocent angel card. or when you cheated on all your trigonometry tests in high school by writing the answers on your upper thigh and then wearing a skirt to have easy access to the answers. in your words, you never got caught because if the teacher asked you to lift your skirt he would be a sick perv! 

he wasn’t complaining, your stories were entertaining at the very least, a nice distraction from his own world. 

by now, leon had given in and gotten you that margarita, only one, sure he wasn’t a saint— he was a guy in his mid-thirties wanting to fuck a girl almost a decade younger than him— but he wasn’t horrible. 

you, on the other hand, had no sense of how to drink alcohol, sipping down the juice like it was juice and the effects were beginning to become apparent by your tittering and giggling. 

you were having a great time, getting looser and sloppier as you continued.

“y’know, leon? you’re like, totally hot! likeee, i haven’t met a guy your age that looks this good!” you babbled, giggling at your own words.

nodding, leon raised an eyebrow, “yeah?” he replied, he was getting force fed compliments by you, it was starting to get annoying, but he wouldn’t say that. 

you were like a puppy, he already made that connection,

but you were definitely one of those overly clingy puppies, the ones that whimpered and whined when their owner wasn’t in the same room they were in. you’d probably do anything to please your hypothetical owner, you already offered to do anything for a margarita, god knows the skies the limit with bimbos like you. 

he wondered if you would follow him out of the bar, like a puppy. where are we going? can i come with you? can you take me in?— okay, maybe not that last part, but he couldn’t be too sure. 

you’d have some cute floppy ears as a pup, leon thinks, but that was enough of the puppy metaphors, you were still giggling and babbling stupidities. 

after a bit of buttering up, leon decided that if he wanted to make a move on you, it was now more than ever.

you would be more than willing, that’s for sure.

taking out his wallet and calling over the bartender, leon fished out his black american express�� sure, it was a silent brag, but he didn’t care. 

“i’ll pay for the lady’s drinks too,” leon explained as he signaled over to his side, the man nodded and took his card before stepping away to finish the transaction. you stared at the older man with stars behind your eyes, sparkling under the dim yellow light, “you’re so sweet,” you began, leaning in against his arm, batting your eyelashes up at him. 

your arms wrapped around him, hugging it, squeezing and feeling the muscle under the jacket that just so did a good job at hiding his build. 

your brain was starting to melt as you squeezed his biceps, “can i make it up for you? i can pay you back,” you cooed, words slurred slightly as you nuzzled your head against his jacket. it smelled nice, he smelled nice. his cologne was almost sweet, and masculine, but not musky and gross, it was so nice, he was just so nice. 

leon glanced down at you, taking back his credit card as he did so. 

you were so fucking desperate to get fucked it was almost laughable.

“you can make it up to me,” he hummed, his arm slipping around your smaller waist, his hand coming to rest against your hip, squeezing the flesh. 

“c’mon,” he nudged, patting your hip before he stood up from the stool and took hold of your hand, leading you away from the bar. it almost seemed like he was taking you to the back exit, was his car back there? you followed behind him, clinging onto his arm, you were nothing more than arm candy for him. 

as the music got softer and the chatter died down, leon lead you down the small hallway in the back of the bar, by where the bathrooms were. 

you assumed you would just walk past them and slip out through the back door, but instead, leon’s arm moved to rest behind your back, letting you walk in front of him before he pushed you into the men’s bathroom. 

stumbling, your gaze moved around the new setting. “leon! you didn’t need to push!” you whined, fixing your skirt as you looked back at the older man. leon was by the door, his hand holding the door knob as he shut the door behind him and locked it. “sorry, sweetheart, couldn’t have anyone see you. you’re not supposed to be in here.” he said, a small huff of amusement leaving his lips as he moved to face you. “men’s,” he reminded, pointing over at the singular urinal by the toilet. 

“oh, yeah,” you said, suddenly not seeing an issue with his actions. 

“why are we here?” you asked curiously, leaning against the sink, the bathroom was small, just a single-person layout. “you said you wanted to make it up for me, right?” leon reminded, you nodded, your head tilting to the side. “well, you’re gonna make it up to me here, that’s not a problem, right? there’s no harm in a bit of thrill.” he waved off.

“wait, we’re gonna fuck here? but that’s like, totally gross!” you whined, your lips curling into a small pout, leon stepped closer, “it’s not that bad, it’s just a bathroom.” he shrugged, he’s been in worse situations. he’s ran through sewers, lived off scraps in spain, and didn’t have access to showers, he’s been covered in blood and zombie guts before— safe to say, a meek little bathroom at a bar was the least of his worries. 

“but like, the floor is gross and sticky!” you whined, why couldn’t he take you back to his place? that’s so not cool! 

leon hummed, moving to press your body against the porcelain sink of the bathroom, he stood behind you, his hands resting on your hips nicely. “i’m not gonna throw you against the floor, sweetheart, relax,” he said, a small breath leaving his lips as he moved one of his hands against your upper back, applying pressure and bending you over the sink. your manicured hands moved and gripped the sides of the sink as your head leaned up. 

you locked eyes with leon through the mirror, he had the same brooding expression he’s been holding for most of the evening. 

leon’s gaze moved from your back to your pretty face as he gazed at you through the mirror, icy blue eyes meeting your warmer ones. “i’m gonna keep you here, yeah? bent over and pretty, so relax.” he explained, his hands moving back down to your hips, sliding down to grip your ass. he squeezed the flesh of your ass before his hands slipped your denim skirt up. 

“cute,” he complimented, tone coming out more monotone than he intended. you were wearing these cute literally lace panties, they were a cutesy little pastel pink. 

did you always wear these out or were you wearing these just so any guy that wanted to fuck you saw?

your face heated up, your eyebrows furrowing up slightly at his words as you glanced at him. a small whine left your lips, “do you like them?” you asked softly, arching your back nicely, popping your ass out, the curve of it showing off the cute little panties like it was a lingerie ad. or screenshot of a porn video. “yeah,” leon replied, “who are you trying to impress, sweetheart?” he asked, rubbing the curve of your ass idly. 

you bit your bottom lip and swayed your hips twice to side in a slow motion, “you?” cheeky. leon let out a scoffing laugh as his hand moved away from your ass before it came back down, smacking your flesh, your body jolted in surprise. “leon!” ouch! what the fuck! “sorry, i couldn’t help it.” leon said from behind you, looking at the mirror, you noticed the lazy smirk on his lips. 

“you’re mean, at least give me a warning.” you whined, “that would take away the fun, don’t be a baby.” leon grumbled.

pursing your lips, you let out a small huff, asshole!

leon’s hands moved to your panties, hooking his fingers around the waistband before he tugged them down unceremoniously. he was sloppy and drunk, besides, this was a quick bathroom fuck, he wasn’t going to play like the man of your dreams.

chewing on the inside of your cheek, you felt the bathroom breeze caress your exposed skin. 

leon didn’t care enough to push your panties down to your ankles, deciding to just leave them by your mid-thigh.

his hands reached back up to your ass before he angled your hips up slightly and slipped down to his knees. “leon—?” you were just about to ask what he was doing before you were cut off by a gasp being ripped out of your lungs, feeling his warm tongue press against your puffy pussy. 

leon’s lips were pressed against your cunt, one hand holding your thigh up as your weight rested on the porcelain sink, the edge of the sink still digging against your pelvis uncomfortably— but the attention to your pussy was making the discomfort a forgotten thought.

“leon!” you squeaked, your hand squeezing the sink as he sloppily licked and sucked on your cunt. 

was it the best head you’ve ever gotten? no, but you didn’t care— given that it was an older man and hotter than any grimy guy your age, you didn’t really care! 

huffing against your cunt, leon slipped his tongue between your folds, he wasn’t doing this to get you off either, but he didn’t have lube, so spit was the second-best option. with his eyes shut, his nails dug into your thighs, savoring the taste of your cunt. 

you kept your back arched and your ass stuck out as small mewls and whines left your glossy lips, your eyebrows furrowing slightly as your breathing got shaky. 

his licks were quick and sloppy, his own spit rolling down his chin, making his skin glossy before she pulled away from your cunt— a line of drool connecting his tongue and your cunt. 

you let out a noise of displeasure, that was so quick and anti-climactic!

standing back up, leon huffed as he stared down at you, catching the pout on your lips. “what? did you want me to go in without prep?” he asked, letting out a small breathy laugh, “should’ve just told me.” he shrugged, his hands slipping down to his pants as he sloppily undid his belt, fumbling with the leather.

“what? no!” without prep? that would hurt! 

“then stop pouting.” leon bit back. 

slipping his cock out of his pants, he let out a shaky breath as his hand wrapped around it. beating his fist around his dick, leon huffed, feeling his cock come to life slowly— the whiskey was making it hard to keep his cock up, but eventually, he managed a semi. 

good enough. 

moving his cock against your slick cunt, leon nudged the tip against your warm pussy, teasing your folds. letting out a small breath through parted lips, your eyes shut, focusing on the feeling. 

tilting his head to the side as his gaze stayed focused on your cunt, watching your spit covered folds spread as he rubbed his tip up and down your slit, slipping it under before he slapped his shaft against your puffy clit, watching your shoulders tense at the feeling:

“g’nna put it in,” leon mumbled, slurring his words slightly.

“o-okay.”

slipping his tip back against your slit, leon nudged his cock forward, his tip pushing apart your walls, they eagerly spread— warm and wet, welcoming his cock nicely. 

sucking in a sharp breath, leon clenched his jaw as his lips pursed, fuck, was the only thought in his mind.

feeling his cock push past your pussy walls in a slow, savoring pace, your eyes fluttered as they rolled back, your lips parting as a shallow gasp left your lips. gripping the porcelain sink, you whined. “leon..” you mumbled, biting your bottom lip as you raised your gaze to look at him through the mirror. 

“yeah?” he mused, his hips and thighs resting flat against your ass as he held your hips. meeting his gaze, his own eyes were lidded, face flushed pink, “i haven’t even started n’you’re already whimpered like a puppy.” he huffed, moving one hand to your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair as he yanked it back— making your back arch almost painfully. 

a sharp yelp left your lips at the movement, “..leave me alone,” you replied to his tease, your eyes shutting. 

leon said nothing in reply, instead, he pulled his hips back, feeling your walls hug him snugly, a shuddering breath leaving his lips as he did so. you might be a fucking idiot, but your pussy was making his brain numb. 

gasping out a moan, you felt his cock pull back before it slipped back inside your cunt, his cock nuzzling against your cervix. your pussy was practically a fleshlight if leon thought about it. 

drunk bathroom sex wasn’t something out of a dream or a porno, it wasn’t meant to be meticulous and romantic, it was gross and sloppy— that’s what this was. leon’s cock stuffing in and out of your pretty pussy at an uneven pace, hard, fast, and sloppy. 

“f—fuck—“ you choked out, your hand moving to rest against the mirror as you clung desperately onto something. your eyes were shut, lips parted into an ‘o’ shape as his cock bullied your pussy, “s-slow down!” you squeaked. leon groaned, “you can take it, relax.“ he muttered, hips snapping against yours, heavy balls slapping against your puffy clit. 

letting out a drawn-out moan, you shook your head dumbly, your brain mushy, “no..” you mumbled. yes, you could take it, if anything, you wanted it, but what happened to having fun? leon let out a small grunt, gripping your hair and making you arch more— he leaned over slightly and pressed a small kiss on your forehead, “your pussy is telling me otherwise, sweetheart.” he cooed, letting go of your hair before he gripped your forearms and brought them to your back, keeping them flush against your back before using them as leverage to continue fucking your cunt.

your eyes rolled back as your body rested against the porcelain, fuck! you were so turned on it was hard to place it into words—! you couldn’t even speak. 

guttural moans were leaving your lips, your walls fluttering around his cock, squeezing and gripping, sucking his cock back inside you greedily. 

while leon fucked you, he realized how increasingly louder you were getting. your pretty moans were nothing but an ego boost, but he shouldn’t be fucking a twenty-something-year-old girl in a public bathroom, he doubts the shitty country music that played through the bar speakers was going to be able to drown out your noise if you continue, so he moved to grip your wrists in one hand before he reached out from behind you and clasped over your mouth.

your cunt squeezed, “shhh,” leon cooed, “can’t let people hear you, remember?” he reminded, making sure you kept quiet. nodding, you moaned into his hand and squirmed, cheek pressed against the porcelain. 

mid-fuck, leon’s drunken mind realized something— 

he needed to fucking piss. 

he hasn’t realized it before, but now, his lower belly was aching, his full bladder making sure it’s known. 

he tried to ignore it, he just wanted to cum, honestly— but as he continued to slip his cock in and out of your cunt, the more his bladder ached. the organ crying out at him, all that whiskey from earlier was now aching to come out.. how many drinks did he have before? he doesn’t even remember. 

the pressure in his belly was increasing, he could feel his bladder tossle as he moved, if he pressed on his lower belly right now— right above his pubic bone— it would probably be hard. it was like a balloon, jesus. 

letting out a small hiss, leon muttered an “oh, fuck,” moving his hand from your mouth back to your hip, gripping the fat of your hip tightly. his brow furrowing and jaw clenching as he shut his eyes. 

he could pull out, sure, but he was already do fucking close— “..what happened?” you babbled after hearing the mutter coming from the older man after his hips stilled.

leon glanced over at your face through the mirror, you looked fucked out and faced, face of a fucking pornstar. 

“i gotta take a piss.” he mumbled, his hips stilling, but his cock still nuzzled inside you. “huh?” you mumbled, peeking your head up to meet his gaze through the mirror. “i have to piss.” he repeated, his face was flushed, was it because was embarrassed? because he was in the middle of fucking? or because he was drunk? he didn’t know. 

your mind wasn’t going— too stupid and fucked out to even think straight. 

“then go pee—“ you mumbled, assuming he needed to pull out and take a piss before coming back. 

leon stared down at your cunt, feeling your gummy walls squeeze him real nice, “how about i piss inside you?” he breathed, finding his words humorous, this seemed to bring you back to reality as your head perked up. “w-what?!” you squealed, “ew! don’t do that!” you argued, pee was gross already! and inside you? that’s worse!

leon let out an amused breath, “it’s just pee, sweetheart, why the fuzz?” he mumbled, sucking in a breath and feeling his bladder squeeze, making him shudder.

he already made up his mind.

leaning over you, leon pressed his body weight on your back, keeping you sandwiched over the sink. “everyone pees, don’t get all shy on me now.” he mumbled, pressing a kiss on your shoulder as you whimpered, your cunt squeezing him nicely. “no.. it’s so icky..” you mumbled, letting out a small breath.

“then why are you squeezing me so tight?” his lips pressed against your skin, one of his hands slipping under your body and moving to press against your own lower belly, right above your pubic bone, he kept a firm pressure against your tummy.

“why lie to me?” he mused, “you’re practically choking my dick, if anything it’s like you want me to piss inside you.” he laughed, the alcohol in his system was staining his conscience in his moment. if he was sober, he wouldn’t have even thought about taking a piss inside of someone, but he wasn’t sober, and alcohol makes you do things you normally wouldn’t. so here he was. 

you shook your head slightly, but your cunt stayed tight, fluttering around him, were you really getting turned on by the idea of this man pissing inside you? what happened to you? what would your best friends say if they found out you were letting an older guy fuck you in a gross bathroom and finding it hot he wants to piss inside you? 

leon shuddered, okay— wait, it was getting harder to hold it in. becoming borderline painful. sucking in a breath, he shut his eyes, pressing his nose against your skin, he took in a deep breath— taking in the smell of your sickly sweet strawberry perfume, “i’m gonna piss.” he grunted out, a final warning for simple generosity. 

he might be a creep for fucking a dumb girl in a bar bathroom, but he wasn’t fucking evil. 

at least that’s what he tells himself.

keeping his body pressed against your own, his belly pressing against your curved back, keeping you trapped against the porcelain. 

letting out a shaky breath, leon let himself go, a type of bliss he hadn’t felt in a while enveloped him as the pressure in his bladder released. 

your eyes widened at the feeling, it was so weird! it was an icky full feeling, you could feel it slip out of you, staining your pretty pussy, thighs, panties, and floor. you winced, your eyes shutting, a small frown on your lips as you imagined who was going to clean this mess up. leon’s stream was long and hot, your shoulders were tense, feeling your pussy get filled with his warm piss— ew! 

“s’gross..” you gasped, squirming. 

“shh,” leon mumbled, keeping his hand firm against your lower tummy. 

once he finished, leon let out a deep moan, pissing with a hard-on was fucking hard! but finally, his bladder didn’t feel like it was going to explode, he pressed his face against your shoulder, his body shivering as he wrapped his arms around you and squeezed you. he let out a panting breath, his hips resting flush against your ass, you let out a small breath, with his body pressing against you and forcing you against the sink it was making it hard to breathe. 

“i can’t breathe—“ you gasped, clawing at the sink.

a small grunt left leon’s lips as he heard you, “shit, sorry.” he mumbled, pulling his body away from yours. moving your head up, you arched your back and took in a deep breath, feeling your pussy squelch, you swear there’s still some piss clogged up inside your cunt. 

your face felt hot, you were about to ask what he was planning to do now, but he beat you to it, moving his hips tentatively, feeling your cunt squeeze and squelch. his hands moved to your hips, squeezing your ass, his dull nails digging into your skin as his thrusts picked up the speed— finding the same sloppy pace from before. 

your brain was fuzzy, your head tilting to the side as a high pitched moan left her lips. 

leon’s cock rubbed against your gummy walls, rubbing against the spongy little spot right by your tummy that had you gasping. you bit your bottom lip and then whined, you had to keep quiet, remember? 

his balls kept slapping against your clit, kissing that bundle of nerves whenever his hips pressed against your ass. leon groaned— another sensation filling his lower belly, blossoming like a pretty flower as his balls swelled up. shutting his eyes, his pace started to get erratic, fucking into you like you were some sex doll, mumbling curses, he leaned his head back, his lips parting as he panted. 

squealing as he bullied your cunt, you whimpered, your words getting caught in your throat. you couldn’t think, you could barely even breathe, your pussy hugging his cock. 

“are you on the pill?” leon asked through gritted teeth as he fucked you— you couldn’t even process what he said, so you only moaned pathetically, “sweetheart,” he said, a little louder to bring you out of your brain fog, his hand moving to rest against the back of your head, “w—wha?” you babbled, “are you on the pill?” he repeated against, tugging at your hair, you whimpered and shook your head, birth control gave you ache! you quit it immediately! 

letting out a small groan, leon nodded, mumbling a small, “okay.” before he let go of your hair. 

your head fell downwards as his thrusts stayed rhythmless and sloppy, his balls felt like they were going to explode, but he didn’t want to pull out, fuck.

“cumming—“ he gasped, his cock twitching eagerly before his cum spurted out of his tip. moaning, he gave you a final thrust, nuzzling his cock inside your pretty pussy before his cum came out in small drools, filling you up nicely. 

your lips quivered as your walls pulsed around his cock, leon stayed still for a few moments, enjoying the last bits of his orgasm before he pulled out of your pussy— watching as his cum leaked out of your cunt before he shuddered. he stepped back, giving the puddle of piss on the floor a glace as he scowled— post nut clarity hitting him. 

oops.

he pulled his jeans back up and shoved his cock back inside his pants before letting out a small breath. 

whining, you moved your hand to your pussy, nimble fingers finding your clit as you rubbed it, “m’leon..” you mumbled, sticking your ass up as your back arched. leon looked back at you, “mhm?” he hummed, “help me.” you whined, still toying with your clit.

oh yeah, you haven’t cum yet. 

he typically wasn’t the type to stick around after a hookup, the magic dies after cumming, but he did piss inside you, the least he could do was get you off. 

“yeah, yeah, gimme a sec.” he mumbled as he zipped his pants up and fumbled with his belt before he stepped closer. 

he reached out, pulling you away from the sink, “c’mere,” he said as you finally got to stand up straight before he stumbled back and plopped down onto the toilet, sitting you on his lap before he spread your legs. he pulled you flush again his body, resting his head on your shoulder as his hands slipped down your tummy before finding your puffy clit. 

once his fingertips pressed against the nub, you shuddered, biting your bottom lip while you grasped his other hand as it was wrapped around your waist. 

leon was quiet as he rubbed your clit, feeling your squirm and twitch in his arms. 

whimpering, your eyebrows furrowed upward as your head leaned back, your orgasm wasn’t too far at least, after a few minutes of moans and gasps, your body tensed. your pussy felt hot, full, and soppy, “leon,” you gasped, wishing his fingers worked faster! 

he let out a small hum in reply, not really bothering to put effort — he was too drunk for that. 

as the tight coil in your lower belly tightened and tightened, a sharp gasp left your lips as it snapped, your hips shuddered as you came. 

your thighs clamped together, trapping leon’s hand between your plush thighs as you rode out your orgasm. your grip on his arm was still tight, your manicured nails digging into his leather jacket while you rolled your hips against his arm, practically humping his hand as you savored the friction against your cunt. 

“there you go,” leon cooed, pressing a small kiss on the side of your neck before he fished out his hand from between your thighs, watching his fingers glisten from your slick.

your legs trembled as you took in a deep breath, leon pushed you up, making you stand. he fixed your skirt and glanced down at your piss-stained panties, “uh,” he began, “you can throw those away.” he said, feeling guilty for ruining such a cute pair. you frowned, “but they’re my favorite..” you whined, they were so cute! and sure, you could take them home and wash them, but you didn’t want to parade around town with pissy panties, getting pissed in was enough for tonight.

sighing heavily, leon scratched his chin, feeling his stubble scratch his skin before he dug into his jacket pocket and dug out his wallet, “here,” he said as he finished out some cash, “get yourself a new pair, sweetheart.” he said, see he wasn’t so bad. “get yourself a plan b while you’re at it.” he said, handing you the cash.

blinking dumbly at him, you took the money, “huh?” 

leon stared back at you, god. fucking idiot. 

“get yourself a new pair of those cute panties, yeah?” he began, you nodded, “and get a plan b too.” he repeated. the clueless look on your face was both making him want to bash his head against a wall while also wanting to shove his cock in your mouth. “do you wanna get pregnant?” he asked, his tone having a hint of frustration in it. 

you shook your head, “exactly.” he sighed. 

“a plan b will help you not do that.” he explained, finally, a look of realization hit your fucked out face, “ohhh.” you said softly as you fisted the cash. 

“well—“ what the fuck does he say now? ‘thanks for letting me fuck you!’ no! that’s sounded stupid, fuck. 

letting out an exhale, he took your arm and nudged you forward. “come on,” he said before he guided you out of the bathroom, his steps were sped up since he didn’t want to be seen leaving the bathroom with a fucked out girl. 

once outside, leon noticed you were still following him like a lost puppy. 

“what are you doing?” he asked, did you not have better things to do? you were practically attached to his hip, “what?” you asked as you blinked slowly, “why are you following me?” he asked, a bit perturbed by your clinginess. 

you paused, “i don’t know.. i wanna go with you.” 

leon chewed on the inside of his cheek. he should’ve known you would’ve wanted to stick around— he had that thought before, but he didn’t think you would actually want to stay at his side.

moving to rub his forehead, leon let out a breath. 

c’mon, don’t pull on his heart strings like that. he couldn’t just leave you on the side of the road after a fuck like that. besides, you stared at him with those doe eyes of yours, you really looked like a lost puppy. 

“fine, okay, c’mon.” he sighed as he lead you to his motorcycle.

what the fuck did he get himself into?

TAGS! @nilpill @rigorwhoring @dollivication @gor3-hound @v0lturiaq @withonly-sweetheart @pupsmoke @flutterylust @angelstargel @ghosty-the-doll @mydarlingclaudia @lolachannel @t1nyb0nes @mj_el2709 @kerredgraveblog @tr3nzit444s @lilbunnyelle @cigarett3wif3

[fictionalmenxyn]

𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐋𝐚𝐝𝐲

Pairing: dealer!rafe x reader

Warnings: mentions of drugs (weed, molly and vaping), language, pda

꧁꧂

It was thriving, Topper once again throwing another banger of a party. It was living it up in his family’s home. The lights, the music the overall vibe. The boys and you all agreed that this summer would be like no other. Living this summer like it’s your last.

You wore your favourite black tube top with your white halter top underneath along with your short white tube skirt and a pair of military black Jordan 4s. Along with some jewellery. Looking like the perfect girl in the world tonight. Well, to Rafe anyways.

You thrived, this was your element. While you danced with your friends. Rafe sat with Topper and Kelce. Towards the backyard on those outdoor couches.

Rafe could see you through the crowd. To him you were like a beacon of light. Your presence brining out a side of him he’d never get with anyone else.

He and the guys have done a few deals through the night. Making bank as they usually did.

You walked over to the guys after having just refilled your drink. You called out “hey guys!” The boys let out a low whistle. Rafe grinned, moving his hand to your hips as you stood between his legs. He looked up at you “how’re you doing, pretty?” You smiled and nodded “good, good… how’s the dealing?” Topper added “alright, bit as much as we th-”

You stuck your hand out to Rafe “hand some over, I’ll help ya out.” You sipped out of your red solo cup. Rafe grinned and the other two widen their eyes. Kelce said “nah we can’t get you to deal…” you shrugged “it’s fine, I can do it.” Rafe looked up at you. “Make sure you come straight back here, yeah? And if anyone gives you shit call me, got it?”

You nod, as he reached into his backpack he had on the ground next to the couch. He pulled out a couple bags of weed and molly. Rafe added “oh and if anyone wants vapes, tell them to come to the backyard and look for us.” You nodded.

Leaning down you pecked Rafe’s lips. Putting the weed and molly packets into your handbag. As you turn around to walk off, Rafe smacks your ass. You roll your eyes at his usual action.

Later on in the night you return. Walking over. Topper noticed you first “how’d it go?”

You grinned both evilly and proudly. You opened your handbag, taking your vape and phone out first. You put that on the couch next to Rafe. Then you tipped your handbag upside down and dump a load of cash onto Rafe’s lap.

Rafe’s eyes widen “fuck, doll, that’s a fuck ton of cash…” Rafe started to count the cash as you spoke “they gave me extra, I didn’t even ask, guess I’m just lucky.” You shrug casually.

Rafe looked up to you “you made three ‘kay?? I didn’t even give you that much stuff to sell…” Kelce lets out a low whistle “damn, maybe she is a good luck charm.”

You told Rafe “oh also I’m pretty sure I got you three some regular customers. I didn’t give them your actual contacts, so I gave them your number accounts on Snapchat, that okay?”

Rafe smirked, the other two nodded eagerly. Rafe put the money into elastic bands and put the cash into the backpack. He patted his lap “c’mere, babe.” You sat in his lap.

He gently grabbed your jaw, making you look at him. His other hand placed on your hip, lowly.

He smirked and moved so his lips were close to you. He praised “good job, baby, might have you do it more often. So proud, my little dealer.” He pecked your lips. He added “also got cherry papers and vape juice for my cherry lady.” He playfully winks at you as you thank him.

He kisses you, not giving a fuck who sees. At the end of the day he’d actually prefer that, showing that you’re his. His cherry lady.

As you two both kiss, Kelce joked “get a room you two.” Rafe didn’t even look in Kelce’s direction when he playfully flipped him off. Keeping his half-lidded eyes on you and your lips as he spoke to him “shut up, bro, go find a girl and get laid.” Rafe went straight back to kissing you.

Topper chuckles “dude you can’t keep your hands off of her.” Rafe pulled away but stayed close to your face. He side eyed Topper “dude, will you two quit complaining. Go catch a ride or some shit, let us be.” Rafe looked you up and down and whispered to you “look so good, ma, should take you home tonight… let you do what you want, hm? You’d like that, huh? You’ve been such a good girl f’me… helping me sell and shit…”

His hand on your hip moved to your ass, gently massaging it. You chuckle softly “oh yeah? You’d seriously let me do that?” He hummed “yeah, proud of ya, let you do whatever you want, you make it, you get it..”

Rafe pulled out his vape from his shorts pocket. Taking a hit and moving his lips near yours. Blowing the smoke into your mouth as you take it back. You then blow the smoke back out. Rafe loved doing that with you. Smoke kisses were one of his things that got him going. And knowing his girl who was the hottest person in his eyes could do such things with him? Made him weak to the core.

You move and whisper in his ear, knowing it would get him riled up. You whisper “wanna go now and I’ll show you?” He smirked and whispered back “yeah, fuck… god, wanna do so much to you. Let’s get outta here, hm?”

You nodded, standing up, Rafe stood after you. Tugging your skirt down a little as he noticed two guys looking at your ass. Topper playfully rolled his eyes and said sarcastically “bye then you two, leaving Kelce and I to go fuck… damn, what friend you two are.” You smirked. Looking over to Topper you said “Brooke is waiting for you upstairs, she told me to tell you.”

Topper’s eyes almost popped out of his hair “wait, for real???” You nodded “don’t keep her waiting. Topper practically leaped out of his seat and heading into the house. Just as he did that a girl approached Kelce.

So technically you two were ditching them. Rafe took your hand in his as he guided you through the crowded house and out to the front.

You were both in for a long night, a very very enjoyable one.

꧁꧂

(If u want for dealer!rafe, reqs are open)

[procyonloser]

"You fucking kidding me right now?!" Adam yelled, dropping his bags, though his guitar case stayed firmly in hand.

Across the front of his van, someone had painted the word, CHEATER, and that was just the first offense he'd noticed. They'd keyed up the paint job, which was a super fucking awesome duochrome that shifted from gold to orange to purple - fucking ruined now. On the side were a litany of worse insults, saying he had a small dick, that he was a man whore, that he was a shitty musician.

He knew who'd done it, and he wasn't even fucking dating the bitch. She was just a groupie he'd fucked a few times on the road; yeah, he'd fucked a few other girls, so what?

"I'm so going to take you to court, you stupid cunt." Adam hissed to himself, getting in the driver's side. But, the van wouldn't start at all. It wouldn't even try to turn over. It just did nothing. She must have fucked with the engine too.

Which left Adam standing on the sidewalk, fuming, as he waited for an Uber to show up. He didn't even fucking live here! He was just on tour! People all over wanted to hear him play, or they would after they heard him at least!

An unremarkable car pulled up along side him, and the passenger window rolled down, and a blond man in the driver's seat leaned over to smile up at him. "Need some h-"

"Fucking finally!" Adam complained, getting a startled look in return. "I've been waiting for you for like twenty goddamn minutes." Adam waved his Uber app at the man, and told him the code.

"Please, get in. I'm Lucky, by the way." The man said with a wide smile. "I have water in the back, if you'd like."

Adam was still fuming, but he tossed his stuff in the back seat, grabbing out a water bottle and jumping into the passenger seat. Yeah, he knew ubers didn't like that, but he didn't do back seats. He was always in front.

He chugged the water, and crushed the bottle, before tossing it out the window.

"Charming," Lucky said, in not so subtle distaste.

"Fuck you, you don't know the night I've had. Some cunt ruined my van, my gig went shitty, cus the bar was like, no you're supposed to pay me. Like shit I'm doing that. Fucking pussies. Chick run, obviously. Can't do anything right." Adam huffed, reaching down to adjust the seat, pushing himself back and getting a bit more leg room. "So suck a dick and just take me to my hotel, shorty."

"Sure," Lucky said, barely even blinking at the insults.

Adam closed his eyes, and began to feel increasingly drowsy. Well, he'd had a long night. "Wake me up when we get there," he mumbled, before sleep took him.

Adam woke up to a not so gentle slap across the face. He startled upwards, eyes wide, finding himself unable to move. He was restrained, cuffs around his hands and legs, and he was entirely nude.

"W...what the fuck? Where am I?" Adam whispered, horror setting in. He'd woken up with some hard 4s before, after getting drunk, but nothing like this.

"Morning," a voice called, and Adam looked up to find the cabby sitting beside him, smiling brightly.

"...Lucky?" Adam asked in confusion.

"Oh, my name is actually Sam, but the news calls me Lucifer." He reached down, caressing Adam's cheek with heavy lidded eyes, not caring that Adam tried to jerk back and away from him.

"I'm a serial killer, sweetheart. And from what I can see, no one particularly likes you, your girlfriend dumped you, your car was ruined, your band is a joke... It would make sense that you'd just...go missing? Wouldn't it?"

Adam's blood went cold, horror began to set in, even though he wanted to scream and shout and curse the man. He tried pulling on his cuffs, but nothing budged. His attention was drawn back to Lucifer as he pulled out a very sharp looking ritualistic knife.

"W- wait, wait! I can...I can help you!" Adam got out, and Lucifer raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I can help you! I don't like people either! So, I'm not going to say anything about this, you know, I could even tell you about...I don't know, people alone in bars and shit!" Adam tried to persuade him, but he knew it sounded more like begging. "I can...I can be useful, I promise."

Lucifer hummed to himself, appraising him. "You'll be a good boy for me?"

Adam swallowed hard, nodding his head. For some stupid fucking reason, he started to get slightly hard from that.

"Maybe I'll think about it," Lucifer said, but Adam's relief didn't last. "But I can't have you getting away in the meantime. I need to clip your wings."

[j3nniediaz]

🦩 being in the main 4s friend group !! (fluff obvi) ☀️

if u get a crush, be prepared to here 2 diff things.

“y/n how many times have i told u, stop being delulu” from cartman and kenny

and then

“y/n don’t listen to them, yeah u should shoot ur shot!” from stan and kyle

imagine ft calls at like 11:36 pm.. ON SUMMER BREAK TOO

“hey y/n i’m jealous of ur heart.” -kenny

“and why is that 🤨” -y/n

“because it’s pounding inside of u and i’m not.” *white tee by summer walker starts playing* -kenny

“W RIZZ🔥🔥🔥🔥” -cartman

*kyle and stan just privately texting each other*

imagine y’all did talent shows and like one of y’all is a judge.. LMAOO

“alr next is kenny mcormick.” -kyle

*body by megan thee stallion starts playing*

“BODY YADYYADYADY” -kenny

“ur fucking weird… next.” -kyle

* u and cartman r rofl while stan records *

don’t ask why but kenny would smack ur ass like randomly. like when he’s behind u and he realizes he has the chance to smack that dumptruck of urs hes gonna do it.

*smack*

“OW WTF KENNY?..” -y/n

“it wasn’t me it was kyle!” -kenny

“r u serious rn.” -kyle

y’all go over to kyles to study! (y’all never study)

“look at how ___ looks rn😭” -y/n

“they look like a dehydrated horse.” -cartman

“can y’all actually do work instead of copying me.” -kyle

“sowwy kylie wylie… i didn’t mean to….” -y/n

“get out of my house rn.” -kyle

_____

im sorry that’s all u guys get😭..

requests r open *giggles cutely*

[sneakyparsnipslicer]

Real Recognises Real

[I've been admiring the work of @idesofrevolution for a good while now, and I really wanted to give a go at writing a transformation story. Granted I don't have any pictures of hot guys, I'll leave it up to your imaginations. Hope you will all enjoy]

Tom and Eric worked at an envelope factory, despite them only knowing each other for 4 months, the two quickly became friends. Granted shift patterns would often keep them off the same shift, they always enjoyed working on the machines together when they did, laughing and clowning around but getting the job done.

Eric had infact worked at the company a couple of years before whilst Tom joined a few months before Eric came back. Perhaps it was Tom's kind nature, but Eric soon came to trust Tom and open up about things going on in his own life, especially about the passing of a close friend of his, Anthony.

During one morning shift, Eric came down from further up the machine to let Tom know about a changeover the managers had just told him about. 'Hey buddy, just heard from Jake, we've gotta switch over to Size 4s, an urgent order just came in' said Eric. 'For fuck's sake, can't they just stick to the plan for a week for once?' moaned Tom. Eric nodded. 'I know mate, I'll go get the paper ready, you finish up this pallet and stop the machine' said Eric. Tom gave him the thumbs up and a tired smile. 'Hang in there Tom, if you'd like you can come over mine for a few beers in my garage tonight' winked Eric walking off.

Tom was quite surprised, he and Eric used to go out to town after work for a couple of pints but had never actually been to Eric's place. Tom thought about what he should wear. For such a good pair of friends, they both led very different lives outside of work. Eric would often skateboard with friends, play electric guitar, smoke blunts and the like whilst Tom enjoyed his own company, drawing, playing video games and attending conventions around the country. Tom remembered the first time Eric came over to his place he found Tom's Keyblade and had a fun time swinging it around and talking Kingdom Hearts for a while, playing Tekken 3. They both found a lot of respect for eachother's lifestyles.

After work Eric had to hurry off, but he texted Tom his address and told him to come around about 8pm. This gave Tom plenty of time to decide what to wear, settling on his favourite black shirt with rolled up sleeves, blue jeans and white trainers. It felt casual but a bit stylish. Tom set off to find Eric's house, eventually finding it. He knocked on the garage door and shortly after it swung up revealing Eric still in his work shirt but sporting shorts rather than the work cargo trousers everyone was provided.

'Ah, welcome in Squire!' said Eric, stepping aside and beckoning for him to come in. Tom chuckled and went in, finding a seat. Eric would often speak in silly voices at work, often calling Tom 'Squire' and making sentences that rhymed with the word, like desire, fire, drier, etc. For Tom it was a big reason why he loved Eric so much. 'Ooooh, you're dressed up all nice tonight Tommy!' said Eric looking him up and down, then proceeding to his chair where he'd put his guitar, sitting down, placing the guitar on his lap and sparking up a cigarette. 'Oh yeah drinks are in the fridge, help yourself' said Eric, pointing to the fridge on Tom's left. Tom looked inside, found a couple of Tyskies and shut the door, putting one on the table next to Eric. Eric looked up from his guitar strumming, smiled and said 'Cheers buddy!'. Tom found a seat, opened his can and sighed, taking a sip. Still strumming away, connecting some choice notes, Eric looked to Tom. 'What's up mate?' asked Eric. Tom shrugged his shoulders. 'Same shit, different day at work really isn't it?' asked Tom. Eric nodded in sad agreement. 'Oh, did you talk to Jake about training to become an operator on the machines?' asked Eric. 'Yeah, but he said they're busy training Jovanie at the moment, when he's all trained up they might see about finally getting me trained up!' said Tom sarcastically. 'You've been at the company 9 months now, right?' asked Eric, to which Tom nodded. 'It's a fucking joke man, you came along, they went and made Vince an operator, he left, Terry came and got trained, now he's a fucking knob and now they're passing you over again for Jovanie. It's bullshit!' said Eric. Tom took another sip of his drink. 'Yeah, I mean being an assistant is fine but it just sucks getting passed over for a job so many times. I had enough of that back at the food factory I was in a few years back' said Tom. Eric nodded and strummed away thoughtfully.

'Tom, I really want to teach you how to be an operator, trouble is we just never get the time. We both work hard, we both know this' said Eric, looking to Tom. 'Yeah, don't we fucking know it. Sorry I didn't bring my notebook if you're gonna give me some pointers now' said Tom, looking out the garage window, taking a drink. 'Well I've got an idea, but you'd need to call in sick tomorrow' said Eric absent-mindedly, looking out the same window. 'Oh yeah, why?' asked Tom expecting a good reason. 'Because I'll need you inside me' said Eric, strumming dramatically. Tom spat his drink out in shock and coughed, Eric looked to his friend and cackled. 'What the fuck Eric?!' shouted Tom, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand and looking to Eric in disbelief. 'Well think about it buddy, I know you like me and honestly I like you too' said Eric, looking Tom dead in the eyes. It was true, Tom did like Eric a lot, he was decently built, dark haired and bearded with the perkiest ass he'd seen on a man, plus he kept him laughing through the tough shifts, but never did he expect an actual invitation like that.

'I mean, what good will that do? What, I sleep with you one night and you put in a good word to Jake for me?' asked Tom. Eric took a drag of his cigarette and shook his head. 'Nah man, it's like this. You helped me out a lot the past couple of months. When we met, you asked if I was ok, I said no and you heard me out, about Tony, about what I was going through and believe me I'm doing a lot better for it' began Eric. 'And I'm glad you're alright mate, but what's this got to do with anything?' asked Tom. Eric sat his guitar down and turned to face Tom. 'Something Tony used to say to me was 'Real Recognises Real'. And I see that in you. You're a genuine, good guy Tom, just not a lot of people see that in you. You work hard but those fake twats at work overlook you' said Eric. 'So what, we're meant to bond that way over that?' asked Tom. Eric shook his head. 'Tony was really special to me. He taught me a lot and helped me in some dark times, and you're doing the same for me, I'm a lot better than I was 4 months ago, and I want to help you' said Eric, stubbing out his cigarette and taking off his shirt. Tom looked away blushing, just what the hell was going on right now. 'Come on Tommy boy, clothes off' called Eric. Tom dared to look and there stood Eric in his nude splendor. 'Oh… shit…' said Tom nervously, looking away. Eric walked over to Tom and put his hands on his shoulders. 'Trust me mate, you'll enjoy this, hell I think you secretly are already' said Eric, looking at Tom's crotch. Tom looked down and sure enough he could see he was tenting. 'Fuck me, what the hell is happening?' asked Tom, wondering if he was actually having a fever dream right now.

'Choice is yours mate, I don't do this for just anyone. Don't keep me waiting too long, floor's cold' said Eric, walking over to the wall on the other side of the garage and placing his hands on it. Tom looked over at his friend, after a moment's hesitation he decided. 'Oh fuck it' said Tom, proceeding to strip. Both naked, Eric looked back at Tom, taking him in standing at full mast. 'Damn my guy, you've been hiding, huh?' asked Eric, chuckling. Tom walked over, shaking his head. He placed his right hand on Eric's right shoulder, and Tom heard a squeaking rubbery sound and saw his hand was beginning to sink into Eric's shoulder blade. Tom whipped his hand back. 'What the fuck?!' asked Tom, checking his hand. 'It's alright Squire, you'll know what to do' said Eric reassuringly. Curious, Tom placed his right hand back on Eric's right shoulder and the rubbery sound returned and Tom's hand began to sink into his shoulder. Eric began to moan a little as Tom pushed his hand further into Eric's shoulder and down his right arm. Tom began to feel a sense of euphoria as he saw his own arm sliding further in, their muscle masses combining. Tom couldn't quite believe this was possible, but he took a little joy in moving their right arm, flexing it a little. 'Keep going buddy, don't stop!' called Eric. Tom nodded and proceeded to place his left hand on Eric's left shoulder, slipping it on like a long glove. Now their arms were on the wall with Tom standing just behind Eric. 'Damn this is nuts' laughed Tom, resting his chin on their right shoulder, seeing Eric had also gone full hard-on. 'Yeah, but it feels good doesn't it?' asked Eric breathing heavily. Next Tom lifted his right leg and placed it on the back of Eric's upper right leg, it began to sink in almost like stepping into treacle. Once that leg had swelled up, he placed in the left one and all that was left was Tom's head, neck and body. 'Ok, are you ready buddy?' asked Tom. Eric nodded. 'Fuck yeah, buddy!' replied Eric. Tom looked down and positioned his dick between Eric's butt cheeks and began to fuck his way in. Eric started laughing. 'Oh fuck yeah, you know what I like!' called Eric as Tom felt his lower body and torso slipping in. 'Just a sec Tommy' said Eric, and he guided their right hand to make sure that Tom's dick slid nicely into his, stretching it out and making it longer and girthier. Tom could feel it too and felt an orgasmic feeling rush over him, this was ecstasy. 'Yeah we're gonna have some fun with this, ready for the head?' asked Eric. Tom took a breath and proceeded to move his forehead into the back of Eric's head. It slid easily in and with a loud noise like the snapping of spandex, the squeaking stopped and there they stood, a slightly more muscular Eric panting as he shot their load through their shared dick. Eric shuddered and looked up, smirking. 'You alright in there Squire?' asked Eric, feeling his friend inside his mind. He walked over to a mirror and they could see that while they still had Eric's face, their body had toned up rather nicely, Tom was a bit of a skinny guy so the extra muscle wasn't too out of place for Eric. Also Eric had some blonde highlights on his fringe, likely from Tom's hair. 'Damn, we're looking great!' cried Tom inside his mind. Eric nodded. 'Yeah, I know, and the night's just starting. You've got a lot to learn, but you get why I told you to write in sick tomorrow. I'll be showing you how to do the operator's job first hand' said Eric, finishing checking himself out and heading over to try on Tom's clothes. They slipped on quite nicely, if a bit tight.

'Yeah buddy, you know I've always liked your dress sense. It's a good look for us' said Eric, heading back to the mirror to check out how Tom's clothes look on him. 'Yeah, this is gonna be so good. How did you learn to do this man?' asked Tom. Eric looked into his own eyes in the mirror, intently looking to Tom's eyes behind them and smiled. 'That'll be my little secret, Squire' he said, winking and giving their even perkier ass a squeeze. Tom and Eric enjoyed their night together enthralled by their new honesty and willingness to explore themselves within the comfort of themselves, and the next day Tom got to knowing exactly how to operate the machine at work with Eric's knowledge through his eyes and hands. After work they returned to Eric's garage and through those same immense sensations they felt when Tom climbed in, Tom was able to climb out of Eric. They both put their clothes back on and turned to face each other. 'Fucking hell man, that was amazing!' said Tom, looking at his friend with the biggest smile and admiration. Eric returned the smile and nodded his head. 'When you're working with Jovanie next week, don't show him up too much, ok?' Eric winked, playfully knocking Tom on his jaw. 'Thanks for all this, it's been amazing. I'd be so down for doing this again some time' said Tom giving him a thumbs up. Eric walked over and hugged him. 'You're so worth it buddy, and I love you so fucking much' Eric said, he pulled back and kissed Tom on the lips. Eric opened the garage door for Tom and waved him off. Tom began his journey home excited to start the next week of work, whilst Eric sat back down, picked up his guitar and finally opened that can of Tyskie.

[umi-adxhira]

𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐕𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 | 𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐘

𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐋

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒: ᴡɪʟʟɪᴀᴍ ʀᴇx, ʜᴀʀʀɪꜱᴏɴ ɢʀᴀʏ, ʟɪᴀᴍ ᴇᴠᴀɴꜱ, ᴇʟʙᴇʀᴛ ɢʀᴇᴇᴛɪᴀ, ᴀʟꜰᴏɴꜱᴇ ꜱʏʟᴠᴀᴛɪᴄᴀ, ʀᴏɢᴇʀ ʙᴀʀᴇʟ, ᴊᴜᴅᴇ ᴊᴀᴢᴢᴀ, ᴇʟʟɪꜱ ᴛᴡɪʟɪɢʜᴛ, ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀ

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: I've always wanted to do this and they're English so yippee 😍. Some of these (most of these) are based on experience I had in my secondary school so yeah

𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐀 𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐊

#𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌 𝐑𝐄𝐗

Year 11

That kid that did the absolute bare minimum but somehow got decent grades

The Year 7s and 8s all had a crush on him, and it genuinely made him feel uncomfortable 💀

The teachers fucking love him idk what to say he's a good boy ig

The typa guy to adopt future roadmen Year 7s and hang with them during lunch to make them seem cool

#𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐘

Year 11

The annoying-ass kid that would cheat off you in every test yet somehow got better grades than you

Flopped Year 9 and decided he needed to get his shit together (he did the same thing in Year 10 and 11 but git better grades)

Snaps random girls in different schools, especially ones that went to his friend's primary schools to piss them off

Would ask you if he can borrow a pen but never give it back

#𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌 𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐒

Year 10

Got adopted by William in Year 7 but never became a roadman

He did all the non-exam based options for GCSE's (Music, Drama, PE, Art, Photography)

He was obnoxiously loud during class until one time he was alone, so he had no one to talk to, and a group of girls were being loud as fuck and he realised how annoying he was so he stopped

Joined Year 7 thinking Food Tech was gonna be sick, then ended up finding out that it's shit and anyone who did that for an option deserved to jump off a cliff

#𝐄𝐋𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐓 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐀

Year 10

Literally only hangs out with Alfonse in the library because he hates the outdoors (same)

Got all 9s in Year 9 and somehow is hoping for a 10 in Year 10 (no one told him a Grade 9 was the maximum)

Genuinely pissed during Covid so many people got high because the grade boundaries were low even though they bat shit dumb (his words not mine)

Stares daggers into the loud girls because they cannot shut up

#𝐀𝐋𝐅𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐄 𝐒𝐘𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐀

Year 11

Got 4s and 5s in Year 9 but somehow got 9s in Year 10

Hangs out with Elbert because he thinks he makes him cool, hanging out with an older person

School senior, doesn't contribute at all unless it's an opportunity to skip lesson (me)

Always got picked on to read in class because he reads well and fast so that the slow-ass people don't read

#𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐋

Year 10

Got good grades in the mock exams and flopped the real exams (blamed it on the grade boundaries) (same)

Always raises his hand to answer and gets pissed if he isn't picked on

Only good at Chemistry and Biology so he wants to do Triple Science in Year 11

Helps out in school holing for extra credit (he didn't realise this ain't the US so there's no such thing here)

#𝐉𝐔𝐃𝐄 𝐉𝐀𝐙𝐙𝐀

(GOD I HAVE A LOT SO SAY ABOUT THIS MAN I CAN LITERALLY MAKE A WHOLE POST ABOUT HIM IF ALL WANT IT LEMMIE KNOW) (OMG I WANT TO MAKE A JUDE X READER SECONDARY SCHOOL POST AAAAAHHHH I LOVE THIS)

Year 11

Roadman

Sells vapes to Year 7s at a stupidly expensive price but since they're Year 7 they think this is the normal price

Only one in the group that got good grades and not ending up working in their dad's haircut shop

Talkes in class then when the teacher moves him he's like "Miss I wasn't even talking" 💀

#𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

Year 11

Everyone had a crush on him. Jude often tutors him in private and threatens to spread rumours about him if he ever told anyone

Did Art in Year 10 for funsies and Economics because he wanted that one teacher who is physically impossible to help you get a 9 (no one got a Grade 9 in his class) just to prove everyone wrong (he did)

Buys food for his friends if he finds out they don't eat during lunch because the lines are so fucking long

Probably in a long—term relationship with a girl (me) and everyone is jealous of them

#𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑

Year 11

Like William adopted the Year 7s but a significantly more amount (like half the damn school)

Everyone knows who he is. Every lunch time he goes to this one Year 9 girl who sits on the bench lonely and lets her do his hair

She's like his favourite child he buys her food so she doesn't feel lonely and stands up for her when the annoying popular kids talk to her (she gets uncomfortable)

He tutors her as well, even if she's good in class he does this because he wants her to be successful and have a good future (I love this sm)

©️umi-adxhira [17/09/2023]

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 | @nightghoul381 , @serynhe , @kookie-my-little-sunshine , @cy-inky, @aquagirl1978 , @abundance-pathchooser, @lapis-da-lazuli , @ellisgivesmelife013 @surviving-off-ellis-crumbs, @yuan134

[raininyourblackeyes]

What happened at world's??? I'm not up to date 😭

LMAOOO WHAT DIDN'T????

Ok brief summary of every disciplinne which will end up long so

MEN:

Boyang messed up so much in the SP he didn't even get to the free. To quote his coach Brian "I don't even know what that was." My boy obviously thinks that the men need to flop in every city starting with M... Milano 2018, Montreal 2024.... let's hope he keeps that mindset for worlds and olympics because they are also in Milano

Junhwan also flopped in the SP, but not as much thank skating gods! He did better in the fs but I really didn't get anything from his programs this season anyways so I wasn't as devastated as I would be let's say with any prev season's fuck up

Kao also flopped SP missing the combo because of the 4T attempt. Absolutely magnificent opening 4S, best of the SP event! He attacked some titans in the FS but got eaten immediately by 4Lo and 4S

Shoma finally listened to me telepathically and flopped the free

Jason was overscored as fuck, he should not have been above Deniss in any segment but he has the american money. However, he did serve.

Have to mention Nikolaj Memola having a very solid senior worlds debut!!!

Ilia uuuh got the world record in the FS, 227 something and now he's going viral and how I feel about it is 😐 The 4A was magnificent, and yeah yeah he can jump and yeah it's a Succession program but PLEASE WATCH SOMEONE WHO'S ACTUALLY DOING FIGURE SKATING! One can only wonder what's next? A quint? A quad-quad combo? Because he did everything else and I doubt he'll decide to get some skating skills

Donovan was absolutely stellar! And the audience loved him!

The epic highs (Romsky SP) and epic lows (Romsky FS) - as usual

Deniss went clean (if we don't count popping the opening quad in the FS) in both SP and FS. His SP is a religious experience, and he's skating to Hallelujah exactly how Leonard Cohen would have wanted. 100% worth watching (costume deduction for showing tits is soooo funny). He also did a mad thing and debuted a new free st worlds. I was sad to see Blues Deluxe go and very sceptic about Lion King, that's junior music to me but IT WAS STUNNING and I hope he keeps it for the next season so I can see it live in Zagreb

Yuma... GOD!!!!!! He is right now THE best skater we have in this disciplinne. Carolina Costner is doing wonders for his skating skills. And somehow this was meant to be a recovery season. Meanwhile he blew everyone else out of the water. Yuma is definitely worth getting into figure skating. Two stunning programs, some textbook jumps, mind-blowing performance ability and just lovely skating skills

Adam was probably the definition of men singles skating event. 19th in the sp, everyone despaired about him... because you know, there's no hope for Boyang but there is some for Adam? And boy was there hope!!! He goes clean in the FS, does a fucking banned backflip which I am not a fan of, probably thinking "fuck it I did an amazing program but from 19th I have no chance to medal anyways so I'll just do this instead" so he takes 2 deductions. And medals. Biggest jump placement wise in history of the sport. Sooo then fucking Benoit who is already delusional about his choreo skills goes and says how he wants to create choreo so revolutionary that could potentially get him banned. My dude, you should have been banned a long time ago for Kaori's I love being a woman free at least...

WOMEN:

Tbh they were in the middle of the night for me and since men singles is my fave disciplinne it's also the only one I'd stay awake for so... not much to say here. Sorry. But there wasn't any insane drama I think, the results did take me out in the SP, but it ended up pretty nice in the end

I did see Kaori and while her programs are far from my favourites this season I am 100% convinced that girl could sell me anything. The highlight of both her performances, apart from how insanely well she did to come back from 4th to win overall in the FS, was her reaction to a botched Lutz landing in the SP. Her SP is also dedicated to her niece and nephew and it's so soft. Also imagine in a few years a teacher asks kids to say a fun fact about themselves in the first class and this kid gets up and says uuuh my aunt won her 3rd consecutive world title with one of the programs being about me being born. THE FLEX!

I only got to see Hana's FS in real time and I have made an entire post about Shakuhachi so please go watch that if you haven't, it's a masterpiece. Koo Koo Fun is also a masterpiece in some other aspects! Also go watch that! I think she did an amazing job for a kid at her first worlds in her first senior season.

Mone WHAT A COME BACK IN THE FREE!!! Which rip... I like her SP more, but definitely also chek out the Sendai baby Mone if you haven't

I've seen Amber's FS, the only clean 3A of the evening. I really hope she can one day pull off a completely clean free one day

Young had an epic performance in the SP, that StSq is just cheff's kiss. I didn't catch her FS but uhhh I also don't really want to hurt myself so I won't even try to look for it

Chaeyeon sadly has a Benoit abomination for her FS, her SP is also by Benoit but she sells it so well. I say this about her FS because quite frankly it's the FS that got her the medal.

PAIRS:

Deanna and Maxime. That's it that's what you need to know about pairs. She is a superstar, they did an Interview With the Vampire free with stunning costumes. Their SP was a firecracker! Deanna is the oldest woman ever to win the gold in figure skating, and she should be THE inspiration to all little girls trying out the sport thinking that it's just a few years of fame. You can be 40 and winning gold in your home city!

Riku and Ryuichi did so well considering they are coming back from an injury and they brought back Woman (2020-21 and 2021-22 FS). Silver was very much very well deserved

I think the only other team I remember leaving an insane impression on me were Hocke/Kunkel in the SP, absolutely fucking robbed.

Pairs was overall the best disciplinne and you should watch it, I didn't have time to see any free skates except for SD/D and M/K so that's about what I can say about the event

ICE DANCE:

Head in hands, this used to be a disciplinne where you go to therapy (skating skills) after the horrors (jump fests)

Chock/Bates won which is a fucking joke because the only thing they have going for them is the fact that Madison is hot and that can be a distraction once or twice, but not at every fucking competition and not at worlds. When will they retire?

Piper and Paul were stunning, their programs are always either a hit or a miss no inbetween and this season they are a HIT! Especially the Wuthering Heights FD you should see it! They won the free, but Skate Canada forgot to homecook in the RD so they got silver overall

Charlene and Marco have the campiest RD this season but it works!!! The only superheros I am willing to watch on my screen, marvel wishes it's characters had what these two do. Their FD is also really nice. LOVED Barb's interview where she said Madison and Evan are slow af lol, but rip she was so confident about G/F placing above G/P and then bam bronze

LALA THE TRUE WORLD CHAMPIONS! Absolutely stunning and fun RD to Thriller with Zachary actually being the main character. It's also my mom's favourite ice dance program of the season overall! And then you have a complete change of emotion and tone in their Roses FD which is just soft and elegant and she is literally dressed in flower petals. They showed so much variety and growth this season. It's a program made to be adored, and their skating offers so much quality. RD is passionate and mindblowing, FD is enchanting seamless. If ice dance was a real sport they would be the world champions!

Christina Carreira and Anthony Ponomarenko in strong contention for my fave RD this season. I am probably a bit biased becasue it's Stevie Nicks. They had an amazing glo up this season imo. Their FD offers a lot of intense character projections: obsession, possessiveness. Choreo is intricate, it's a very tasteful program. Someone on here said we should have more programs about murder after their performance and I couldn't agree more. ALSO Scott and Madison in the K&C!!!!!!

You can barely guess that Lim/Quan are a first season senior couple. They managed to make me watch Let's Go Crazy without sighing about how much I miss Yuzuru. Insanely hot in that program. Their Umbrellas are also in my top 3 free dances this season. Amazing performances at their first senior worlds

Ok I'm only gonna mention absolute delight and theatrics that Pirihara bring on the ice. Such a unique Chicago presentation! I can't wait to see what they plan to do next season.

[the-chessboard-is-personal]

ii s1 liveblog but it's just one line per episode and all in one post because people seem to hate liveblogs

also under a cut so the post can be short

1 - gh. this is. 13 years ago?? yeah it sure looks like it. call me problematic or whatever but PLEASE tell me the animation quality gets better. PLEASE. I don't hate the show for this but it is hard to watch /gen

2 - bomb stuttering so much he needs subtitles feels like a harmful representation of people who chronically(?) stutter but I don't stutter so I don't have a proper opinion on that (could someone in the notes confirm or deny?)

3 - KILLED HIM?? (<- said when Balloon was popped) okay it's really funny how in this episode alone I could say that and be talking about threE DIFFERENT CHARACTERS-

4 - okay so I paused in the LOL scene and. "TO DO LIST: REPLACE COINY!" ? ..anyway. what the fuck was that

5 - no budget ass montage skip /silly- ah. nevermind 5.5 ?? - no actually I didn't know that about the 10 contestants thing because no one ever said it in an episode prior to that. also dictionary definition of Taco I see you

6 - who the fuck was that in the intro. is there an orange character?? also what the hell. I didn't install an adblocker for that. UNAUTHORIZED FUCKING THING 🔴. BLOW IT UP NOW!!

7 - who the Phuck is that. wait. that's another MePhone. OH SHIT THEY HAVE BEEF ?!

8 - MePhone 4S?? KILLED HIM??? hm yeah no wonder this show has "insanity" in the title what the fuck is going on

9 - ehh not much to say about this one tbh

10 - don't tell me the fucking COMMERCIAL OBJECT is gonna win

11 - hey neat slideshow. I See You. also yeah yeah this was 12 years ago, but. ......one of these characters seems like a harmful stereotype and this time I'm not talking about Bomb. uh. no further comment. AAAAAAAAAAAA AUDIO DESYNC AAARGHSDFKJG HDLS;JGHGHOS;GHSOLKG RAGRHJ HGARRGAHG RAGHRHAGHGH /negative (sorry again call me problematic but audio desyncs ruin things for me)

12 - oh. more episode 1 flavored pain and suffering. great. oh they don't like it either lol. also what is narnya

13 - OJ you dumbass you SAID THE THING. also hey neat clouds. I See You. ... [paper lore happens] me: yep uh huh *eyes glaze over*

14 - minecraft glass sound hahah[gets hit with the realization that Minecraft is 12 years old] ..haha idiotic island TWOOOO-...oh.

15 - it's him!! and he has claws now! oh he's pathetic. ohh hehe I see. "I'm pretty sure I don't." foreshadowing much? wait WHAT DID 4S JUST SAY

16 - "I guess it's nothing" mhm. sure... jhfkasf "Oh pleas[like button lights up]e, like you've never eaten a sock before" ..4 arms MePhone?

finale part 1 - NOO THE BOX IS OPEN!! wow why so many MePhones- oh wait that's. that's probably a parody of iphone. huh

finale part 2 - "you're DVD and I'm blu-ray" hahahahhaha yeah? you sure that's the gotcha you want it to be? ..oh. OH. w,hat ??hmm ratings huh? reminds me of someo[I am Thwomp'd]

one thing. why does the orange never show up again after that one thing in episode 6 ?

[sillypuppetsposts]

Can we have some headcanons of how Frank Frankly would act if them were a suitor of yours (that is, of the reader)? please and thank you

a/n ;; OHH,,, FIRST REQUEST *breakdances* also please, i’m assuming reader is meant to be masc or enby presenting since frank is gay ^^ Because i am feeling enby atm since I am gender-fluid! Also, Y/n is described as being a lively and happy person,, :)

tw / cw (?) ;; swearing (they curse at wally a couple of times), marriage (OMG COMMITMENT😰😰), wally being a little shit! :) plus, (maybe) some horror and arg elements so be cautious! also mentions and hcs of poly frank x eddie x reader :3

BEFORE DATING OR BECOMING YOUR SUITOR!

Tsundere alert!!!!

Anyways, they aren’t as affectionate as the other puppets. But, that’s okay! You know they’re your friend, and they love you and your other friends as well.

Little did you know…

Frank was more confused when they were feeling these strange feelings, they would get red in the face whenever you complimented them or gave them gifts of any sort. And they would sweat and get flustered when you would hug them or slightly touch hands.

As You know, they are the grumpiest neighbor. So, someone acting super affectionate towards them (besides Eddie and Julie) made them feel so, special.. <3

They go to Eddie first, asking him why they feel this way. But, Eddie is kinda… oblivious to attempts at this stuff, so he just thinks your being extremely kind to Frank. So, our Eddie pookie was not too much help 😭

So, they go to Julie. And, Oh, she tells them what they’re feeling alright.

“Wait. You feel strange around y/n? How?” | “You get butterflies in your-oh. OH! OH MY GOSH FRANK! YOU LIKE Y/N!!!” “Of course I do, Y/n’s my friend?” “… Frank, I mean you like them, romantically.” “oh. oh.. OH!”

So yeah, that’s how they figured out they liked you.

And, now they are definitely planning to court you… because of course they are.

“Hello, Y/n. Would you like to go butterfly watching with me?” “Oh! I would love to, Frank!!”

They plan this out, he asks you to go butterfly watching with you, and ask you about courting you.

(Which, may I add, Is so stinking cute like wtf where can I find a love life like this..I have no maidens erm… ☹️)

So, when you guys were walking towards a small hill a little bit away from the neighborhood. They decide they’ll ask you on the hill.

So, when. you reached the top they waited for you to be distracted, and got on a knee and… well, courted you.

It was adorable and you were blushing when you realized what was going on.

AFTER YOU START DATING OR BECOMING YOUR SUITOR <3

Oh goodness.

Cutest couple ever! Like everyone thinks you two are adorable!

Everyone thinks it’s cute because your guy’s trope is basically opposites attract!

Wally being a little shit, and third wheeling, but distracting you and Frank gets annoyed 😭

“what do you even see in him?” —frank, questioning your friendship with Wally. “He makes me laugh :)” — You, who thinks he’s a silly guy

CATCHING AND STUDYING BUTTERFLIES TOGETHER!!!! THOSE ARE YOUR GUYS’ DATES!!!!

You like to play office with them and Julie

They don’t like it because Julie always kicks down their desk after they go bankrupt 😭😭

you sleep in the middle of frank and eddie because if you don’t you end up falling off the bed because eddie is a rowdy sleeper

“how did you end up on the ground, dear?” -frank, worried “i rolled off” - you, who got fucking pushed off the bed when eddie was having a dream

when you, julie and frank were catching butterflies on a hill, they tripped, and rolled down like a tube, so when julie started to sprint on all 4s, you hopped on her back and acted like a cowboy trying fetch a stray sheep…

Frank is still traumatized about that til this day…

[miraruinada]

Local shots, did it better than the local slop When I let that bang, it ain’t a party pop Yеah, they know my face, they know my name Yeah, they know my spot, they know where I hang But they don’t circle that block, cause they know what’s good for their health Shave, shave, swinging, approach with caution cause you might just end up swimming

Look, the old girls winning He’s giving lip, then I might just chin him Grab the wheel then the axel's spinning I've been in this game from their hairline thinning Blood's still thicker but the drink keeps spilling Pouring a pint on a Friday night, we're them old school villains Got an arsenal down south, got a small farm out west So just drop one text, track down the 87 Revive, no stress Yeah you know me son, you know my face, you know my status So just shut your mouth before I put your face on the front of the papers You got my number, I've got the deals and I've got them favors Got a garden next door, you know I got no neighbors I’m a local hero, and I’m talk of the town Never pulled over, foot flat down And I can’t drive straight cause I ain’t that sober

I’m a lovely geezer, but I’m a violent man I cook opps in pots, and smash eggs with pans Knock knock, who’s there? I came to kick your front door down I got excessive, bang bang pow, I laid another man down I’m moving reckless and grab that man by the necklace Phone got robbed for the line, texting his number Like, look, call this one next time, I came from dirt and it all got dirty 30s, 2-2s and 4-4s, make moves in a burnt out box And I made it big but I still want more, put in the work and the books got sold Get rolled in a cig, get poured in a pint Get sent back home in a XL bag Coulda just left it, coulda went walking But ELMN brought two toe tags I don’t make love, I make magic Got me speaking Spanish Got me singing love songs in traffic

"...Holy shit. What the fuck?"

[initiumseries]

Across the Spiderverse Review

Okay! I will preface this saying, I want to see it a second time because there was SO MUCH STUFF, and it was beautiful and amazing and I just think there was so much detail in all of it that I need another watch so I can absorb what I missed in this pass. That being said, this will mostly be a stream of consciousness kind of thing but I will try to keep it into pros and cons. Naturally, there are **SPOILERS** here.

I’m going to start with cons because there were so few and I want to end on a good note. 

Con #1: We start with Gwen’s story. I came to see Miles Morales. The last movie we spent a lot of time with Peter too, and I just don’t like that Mile’s really interesting story is split between these secondary, less interesting, white characters. Miles is going through this huge crisis of identity, and I’m wasting time sitting here watching Gwen lamenting her own issues, only for her to turn around and betray Miles the way she did? Pass. I’m not interested in Gwen’s interiority, I don’t care how much she’s struggling with trying to do the right thing or whatever. This is Miles’ story. Let me get into Miles’ interiority. I felt like most of the time we were watching Miles instead of getting into Miles’ head, and going through those rollercoaster of emotions with him, and watching him struggle. Gwen gets a voice over about herself, her life, her best friend Peter, a LOT about Peter and a little of her friendship with Miles, Miles’ voice over is weighed down by his feelings about Gwen and rehashing what we already know. Like, a whole sketchbook full of Gwen? Really? Ugh. 

Now onto the pros: 

Art Pros: This movie is fucking beautiful.  

I LOVE that every universe has its own design style, and I LOVED how they made sure every web slinger had his own way of slanging them webs. Such amazing detail. I saw a storyboarder on twitter talking about how his approach with Gwen, since the note was that she be more like a ballerina, was having Gwen swing like a gymnast and use banned gymnastic moves in her webslinging. LOVE. 

I found out from a friend that Miles is animated on 2s and Miguel is animated on 1s and some other characters animated on 3s and 4s and that means nothing to you if you aren’t in animation, but again, the care and detail? Miguel being animated on 1s means his movements will be sharp, precise, piercing and fast. Which sums up his personality (barring the unhinged element). Miles being animated on 2s, how we normally would animate classically, means exactly that. I just think that’s SO WONDERFUL. *full geek out mode* 

I’m OBSESSED with the fact that you can see Spot’s construction lines?? 

I geeked out SO HARD when I saw these because it’s SO cool and fun, and construction lines are something you usually hide, so to include it I was like...oh this is ART art. 

This kind of animation???? 

The bowed legs, the reach in and wiggle?!?! The wiggle!?!??! THIS children, is what we call character animation. 

His hand just...flopping off the shelf? The impact of his weight as he leans on the shelf? GUYS. GUUUUUYSSSSS. 

These are small details but oh my god do they elevate a scene. These animators deserve ALL the awards. 

Hobie. Now Hobie...he’s gonna be in both story and art. Because omfg. 

When I found out he needed a hidden secret rig underneath his actual rig, before I saw the movie, I was like...why on EARTH would you do that? And then I saw the movie and was like...oh. YEAH. Sometimes you do that. And the results? Fucking phenomenal. Hobie said he was inconsistent and his style kept changing. BRILLIANT STUFF. 

 I love a tasteful meme jokey joke. 

Okay! I have to cut myself off, onto story pros: 

I love that Mile’s crisis of identity isn’t just rooted in his being spiderman and Miles. His mother being APPALLED he has a B in spanish, and then trying to talk to him in spanish and not just spanglish was such a nice additional layer to everything else going on with him. I love that when he finally works up the courage to tell his mother he’s Spiderman, he’s in the wrong universe (which I’ll get to). 

Miles wanting SO badly to be a part of something, and then finding out there’s a whole universe of spider folks, and just the successive disappointments in Gwen as he found out more information was good. I also like that because he wants so badly to be involved, he’s not being critical, and it’s Hobie who keeps trying to help him gain some perspective despite him being jealous over stupid Gwen. 

I love that Hobie says, I hate the AM and the PM (I did NOT catch that the first time! Hahaha brilliant). Him stealing throughout the fight over the collider? Then seeing the pay off later with Gwen? AMAZING. Him quitting when shit hits the fan? Perfect. Hobie is a fave.

THIS moment. 

The fact that when Miles finally figures out that Miguel means for him to let his canon event of his father dying go through without interruption, and decides he doesn’t actually want to be a part of this new crew, it’s Hobie’s advice and Spider Byte’s  choosing to not stop the machine, that helps him. After the serious disappointment of the white people around him, it’s Black people he just meets that step up to the plate to support him, young Black people on top of it. That wasn’t an accident and is a very typical experience. I am already shipping him and Spider Byte and i NEED that to be a thing in the final movie. 

I actually really like the idea that Miguel is a villain. He’s so rigid in his thinking, and so myopic, he refuses to see there’s any other way to do things. So while he thinks he’s the good guy, and is leading the good guys, he’s leading them astray, and I think it really speaks to how sometimes you can live long enough to see yourself become a villain and have to stay constantly vigilant and interrogate yourself a lot and not be closed to a new way of doing things, like Miles. MAN did that fight scene where he rips Miles to shreds about being an anomaly HURT. So good. 

Miles’ father struggling to relate to him, only for us to realize that he has a bigger impact on Miles than we think, especially with the way it seems like Miles is pushing him away. But then, we meet, fucking PROWLER MILES?!?! SO. FUCKING. GOOD. 

I noticed right away, when Prowler!Miles started talking and the way he rolled his Rs, even how he’s wearing his hair. With his father gone, Miles’ mother’s influence on him culturally is very clear. Not a bad thing, just a beautiful detail. His uncle’s influence on him leads him to be the prowler, where his dad kept him on the straight and narrow. I LOVE THAT. I love the possibility that Miles meeting himself in this other universe could solidify for him that saving his father is the right thing to do, the necessary thing to do. Or it could shake his confidence. I guess we’ll find out. 

Miles being sent to another universe was SO FUN. They’re very clear this machine uses your DNA to send you where you belong!! Why did it send him there? The theory that it’s because the spider that bit him was from another universe and that it altered his DNA so he ends up here, and I think that’s a salient theory and I love that idea. I think it’s so perfect and thorough. 

I loved that there were so many little moments in this movie that were subtle, but making a clear, progressive statement. This movie was so CLEARLY made by artists, for artists, but also for fans, for the average movie goer, and people who just like good stories. To be able to fold all that in together is amazing and fantastic, and there’s more I’d like to say but this post is already really long and I’ll be seeing it again and will be gushing about it then too. But if you haven’t seen it, or are on the fence, SEE THIS DAMN MOVIE. 

1500/10

[kruxton]

Into more PHC headcanons,

Mr sin will spend time with the form 4s and form 5s as a way to make up for himself on not caring enough for the students.

I imagine kahar and Fakhri will have an awkward time spending together and due to the fact kahar is trying to be a good senior to Fakhri.

I also wanna hear more about your headcanons about Naim and Amir please?

mr sin feels that he is to blame (at least partially) for the situation and its weighing him down heavily. so he steps up his game and actually Does his Job and starts socialising with his students like Pn. Faniza does, because he'll be damned if he lets anything like /that/ happen again

imagining the fakhri kahar situation afterwards is so funny to me. kahar is desperately trying to make amends but he cant do that if fakhri doesnt want to talk to him like 😭😭 bro approaches fakhri but hes looking everywhere but in kahar's direction trying not to get mad is that not the funniest thing ever

OKAY so naim and amir hc under the cut. ive never put this into actual words before so i apologise in advance if they dont make sense ok (edit: it turned out WAY longer than i imagined thats mb)

yk that scene that happens sometime after amir's past and trauma is revealed where naim is really angry (i forget why) but then lashes out onto amir bc smth smth why the fuck do u care so much are u fucking gay for me? (im like 99% sure this happened but if it didnt.. uhmm we're going to pretend it did)

i think in that moment amir didn't know the answer to that genuinely. he definitely knows that /something/ in him changed after what happened to him in that store room, but being gay was NOT an option, it just couldnt be, he wont LET it be. bc its not like he was attracted to any guys, right??? he doesnt care for any guy like THAT, yk?? or at least thats what he thought

once naim accused amir of being gay for him, something definitely snapped. it hurt, it hurt, but it wasnt his dignity that shattered. it was his heart.

(did that go hard? i think that went hard. im proud of myself)

because what if naim was right? what if naim just saw right through him and actually.. believed it?

cue the panic and worry that went on in his brain because who the fuck was he going to talk to abt this. his bestfriend? not an option

i like to believe thats why he barely showed up again until that scene in the hospital. ik the show played it off as them being so so angry at each other, and yeah, they probably were? but the both of them knew something went wrong between them at that moment in the dorm when naim used amir's trauma against him (bc when u put it like that.. how couldnt smth be wrong), and they were worried for their friendship, the both of them.

now we cue the internalised homophobia. i assume u can imagine how that goes

naim getting hurt really bad and needing to go to the hospital is what triggered amir's brain to make up his mind on his feelings and guess what? yeah he's gay for naim. and he doesnt have time to worry abt this anymore cause naim is Dying. he could die at any second. whatever the feelings he harbours for him doesnt matter because after everything he is still his bestfriend.

so he stomps his newfound feelings down and doesnt let himself think abt it. and when they hug in that waiting room and naim goes 'aku sayang kau wei' at him, its bittersweet but he cant ruin the moment, not again.

ok flashforward now

he's content with being naim's bestfriend. sure, he gets jealous when naim goes out with that girl (i forgot her name) but at least now he knows there's a valid reason for it instead of an irrarional envy as his bestfriend, so he accepts it and moves on (he doesnt really. but what choice does he have?)

[pesterloglog]

Karkat Vantas, Terezi Pyrope, Dave Strider

Act 6, page 6017-6921

KARKAT: WHO???

TEREZI: YOU KNOW...

TEREZI: VR1SK4S 4NC3STOR?

TEREZI: TH3 FR13NDLY ON3 WHO T3LLS LONG STOR13S

KARKAT: OH YEAH.

KARKAT: HER.

KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW, I CAN'T KEEP ALL THESE GHOST NAMES STRAIGHT.

KARKAT: FLIPTUNA? MEOWLIN...

KARKAT: WASN'T THERE A CARLOS?

KARKAT: FUCK IT. THEY WERE ALL NAMED CARLOS AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

KARKAT: WAIT. EXCEPT MEENAH. SHE WAS ALRIGHT. A LITTLE FORWARD, BUT...

KARKAT: WHATEVER, THIS ISN'T THE POINT.

KARKAT: ALL I REMEMBER ABOUT MY INTERACTIONS WITH THE SERKET GIRL WAS GETTING CORNERED INTO THESE LUDICROUS MONOLOGUES, THEN RACKING MY BRAIN FOR EXCUSES TO GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

TEREZI: Y34H W3LL

TEREZI: 1 W4S 4 L1TTL3 MOR3 T4CTFUL TH4N YOU 4ND 4CTU4LLY L1ST3N3D

TEREZI: 4ND L3T H3R T4LK M3 1NTO SOM3TH1NG 1 SHOULDNT H4V3 >:[

KARKAT: SO SHE WAS JUST LIKE

KARKAT: *POOF!*

KARKAT: AND SUDDENLY YOUR EYES WERE BETTER?

TEREZI: Y3S

KARKAT: WHAT IS SHE, SOME SORT OF MAGIC FAIRY??

TEREZI: UM. Y3S?

TEREZI: TH4TS K1ND OF L1T3R4LLY WH4T SH3 1S

KARKAT: OH

KARKAT: ALRIGHT, I GUESS HER STORY CHECKS OUT THEN.

KARKAT: GOOD FOR HER.

KARKAT: BUT THIS DOESN'T SEEM LIKE YOU TEREZI. I MEAN, I DIDN'T THINK YOU EVEN WANTED YOUR EYESIGHT BACK?

KARKAT: I'VE NEVER MET ANYONE AS CHUFFED ABOUT HER OWN DISABILITY AS YOU. I WAS ALWAYS UNDER THE IMPRESSION YOU FELT LIKE IT WAS A BIG PART OF WHO YOU ARE?

TEREZI: 1T W4S!!!

TEREZI: TH3 MOM3NT SH3 H34L3D M3 1 KN3W 1 M4D3 4 T3RR1BL3 M1ST4K3

TEREZI: BUT 1 COULDNT T4K3 1T B4CK

TEREZI: 1 THOUGHT 4BOUT 1T

TEREZI: L1K3 JUST BL1ND1NG MYS3LF 4G41N 4ND PR3T3ND1NG 1T N3V3R H4PP3N3D

TEREZI: BUT

TEREZI: 3V3N TH3 W4Y 1T H4PP3N3D OR1G1N4LLY W4S SOM3TH1NG SP3C14L TO M3

TEREZI: 1 C4NT DUPL1C4T3 TH4T

TEREZI: 4ND 3V3N 1F 1 COULD 1T ST1LL WOULDNT B3 TH3 S4M3

TEREZI: 1 C4NT S33M TO FORG1V3 MYS3LF FOR B31NG SO STUP1D

TEREZI: FOR SOM3 R34SON 1 THOUGHT 1T W4S 4 GOOD 1D34 TO T4K3 TH3 ONLY COOL 4ND UN1QU3 TH1NG 4BOUT MYS3LF 4ND "F1X" 1T

TEREZI: WH4T W4S 1 TH1NK1NG?

KARKAT: WHOA WHOA

KARKAT: THE *ONLY* COOL THING ABOUT YOU?

KARKAT: TEREZI. I WANT TO BE UNDERSTANDING, BUT I CAN'T GET BEHIND SOME OF THE SHIT YOU'RE SAYING ABOUT YOURSELF HERE.

KARKAT: WHAT MADE YOU START UNRAVELING LIKE THIS?

TEREZI: 1 TH1NK 1T W4S WH3N W3 ST4RT3D M33T1NG OUR 4NC3STORS

TEREZI: 4ND 1 THOUGHT TH3Y W3R3 4LL COOL3R 4ND OLD3R 4ND MOR3 1NT3R3ST1NG TH4N US

TEREZI: 3V3N THOUGH TH3Y PROB4BLY W3R3NT?

TEREZI: TH3Y H4D 4 LOT OF PROBL3MS 4ND 1NS3CUR1T13S TOO

TEREZI: BUT 1 GU3SS TH3 K1ND TH4T OLD3R K1DS H4V3, 4ND WH3N YOUR3 YOUNG3R YOU DONT R34LLY R3COGN1Z3 TH3M 4S PROBL3MS

TEREZI: YOU LOOK 4T THOS3 TH1NGS 4S JUST P4RT OF WH4T 1TS L1K3 B31NG SOM3ON3 WHOS MOR3 1NT3R3ST1NG 4ND GROWN UP TH4N YOU

TEREZI: M4YB3 S1NC3 1M NOT 4S YOUNG 4NYMOR3 1 GU3SS 1 C4N S33 TH4T NOW

TEREZI: BUT 1 W4S STUP1DLY 4W3STRUCK BY SOM3 P3OPL3 WHO W3R3 NOT SO 1MPR3SS1V3 1N R3TROSP3CT 4ND 1 M4D3 4 DUMB M1ST4K3

KARKAT: WAIT. WE MET ALL THOSE PEOPLE LIKE...

KARKAT: KIND OF A LONG TIME AGO?

KARKAT: HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING THIS FROM EVERYONE?

TEREZI: 1 DONT KNOW

TEREZI: 4 Y34R OR SOM3TH1NG?

TEREZI: 4ND 1 W4SNT H1D1NG 1T

TEREZI: 1 JUST D1DNT T3LL 4NYBODY

KARKAT: YEAH! THAT'S WHAT HIDING IT MEANS.

TEREZI: BUT

TEREZI: YOU USU4LLY C4NT S33 MY 3Y3S 4NYW4Y!

TEREZI: C4US3 OF MY GL4SS3S?? DUH

KARKAT: I KNOW, BUT NOT TELLING ANYBODY THAT IS STILL BEING POINTLESSLY SECRETIVE!

KARKAT: YOU COULD HAVE SAID, HEY KARKAT, I FUCKED UP AND NOW I CAN SEE AGAIN. MAYBE WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS SO I DON'T GO INTO A TRAGIC DOWNWARD SPIRAL AND MAKE YOU WORRY ABOUT ME FOR NO REASON!

TEREZI: 1M SORRY!

TEREZI: 1 SHOULD H4V3

TEREZI: BUT 1 W4S SO 4SH4M3D

KARKAT: AND WHAT ABOUT THIS CLANDESTINE BLACKROM NONSENSE YOU'VE GOT GOING ON WITH GAMZEE?

TEREZI: WH4T?

KARKAT: HAVE YOU BEEN DATING HIM FOR JUST AS LONG?

KARKAT: WAS HE INVOLVED IN THAT DECISION??

KARKAT: LIKE, DID HE HELP TALK YOU INTO HEALING YOUR EYES OR SOMETHING?!

TEREZI: HOW D1D YOU KNOW W3 W3R3 D4T1NG!

TEREZI: D1D H3 T3LL YOU?

KARKAT: OH MY GOD. TEREZI, YOU ARE A FUCKING CATASTROPHE.

KARKAT: YOU USED TO BE LIKE, CUNNING? AND CONSIDERABLY MORE INTELLIGENT THAN ME, WHICH I HAVE NO PROBLEM ADMITTING.

KARKAT: BUT THIS IS RIDICULOUS. EVEN IF I DIDN'T FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF, WHICH I *DID* BECAUSE IT WAS *OBVIOUS*, YOU ARE UP HERE ON THE ROOF LYING UNCONSCIOUS IN A PILE OF HONK HORNS AND FAYGO BOTTLES.

KARKAT: I AM NOT A MASTER OF DEDUCTION, BUT UNLESS YOU WERE RECENTLY STOMPED ON BY SOME SORT OF GOLEM COMPOSED OF GARBAGE FROM A CIRCUS, IT SEEMS FAIR TO SAY YOU ARE OFFICIALLY DOWN WITH THE CLOWN.

TEREZI: UUUGH

TEREZI: OK

TEREZI: Y3S

TEREZI: 1TS TRU3 >:o[

KARKAT: WELL? WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT IT.

TEREZI: 1 COULDNT G3T UP TH3 N3RV3 TO T3LL YOU 4BOUT TH4T 31TH3R

TEREZI: 1N 4 W4Y, 1M 3V3N MOR3 D1SGUST3D W1TH MYS3LF FOR D4T1NG TH4T 4SSHOL3 TH4N 1 4M FOR H34L1NG MY 3Y3S

KARKAT: THEN WHY ARE YOU DOING IT!

TEREZI: 1 DONT KNOW!

TEREZI: 1 C4NT BR1NG MYS3LF TO STOP S331NG H1M

TEREZI: 3V3RY T1M3 1 TH1NK 1 C4NT STOM4CH TH3 S1GHT OF H1S UGLY F4C3 FOR 4NOTH3R S3COND

TEREZI: H3 PULLS M3 B4CK 1N

TEREZI: H3 1S JUST

TEREZI: SO

TEREZI: 4444WFUL

TEREZI: H3 4LW4YS KNOWS 3X4CTLY WH4T TO S4Y TO P1SS M3 OFF

TEREZI: 3V3RYTH1NG H3 DO3S

TEREZI: H1S F4K3 GOD T13R SU1T, H1S SMUG 3XPR3SS1ON, TH3 DUMB4SS W4YS H3 BUTCH3RS H1S S3NT3NC3S

TEREZI: S4Y1NG SH1T L1K3 '4LL G3TT1NG UP 4T H1S MOTH3R FUCK1N HONK ON', 444444RGH!

TEREZI: 1 H4T3 1T SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!

TEREZI: BUT 1 K33P COM1NG B4CK FOR MOR3

TEREZI: H3S L1K3 4 DRUG!

TEREZI: 3V3N MOR3 4DD1CT1V3 TH4N TH1S...

TEREZI: R3VOLT1NG SOD4 1 C4NT STOP DR1NK1NG

TEREZI: 1V3 H4D SO MUCH F4YGO 1 C4NT 3V3N T4ST3 TH3 COLOR 4NYMOR3 >:[

TEREZI: 1 JUST T4ST3 TH3 SUG4R 4ND TH3 BUBBL3S 4ND TH3 4WFUL FL4VOR 1T L34V3S B3H1ND, WH1CH JUST M4K3S M3 DR1NK MOR3 TO W4SH 1T 4W4Y

TEREZI: UNT1L 1 F33L SO N4STY 1 H4V3 TO T4K3 4 LONG SOD4 N4P, BUT 1 W4K3 UP LO4TH1NG MYS3LF 3V3N MOR3

TEREZI: SO 1 JUST R34CH FOR 4NOTH3R BOTTL3

TEREZI: 1T 1S TRULY...

TEREZI: TH3 W1CK3D 3L1X1R

TEREZI: *SOB*

KARKAT: TEREZI...

TEREZI: 1 W4NT H1M TO B3 OUT OF MY L1F3

TEREZI: H3 1S TH3 WORST TH1NG TH4TS 3V3R H4PP3N3D TO M3

TEREZI: BUT

TEREZI: 1 GU3SS YOU C4NT H3LP WHO YOU H4T3

KARKAT: THIS IS KILLING ME, HEARING THIS.

KARKAT: I SERIOUSLY WANT TO WEEP ACTUAL PUKE OUT OF MY EYEBALLS FROM THIS STORY.

KARKAT: HOW DID THIS HAPPEN???

KARKAT: I'VE GOT TO SAY, I DIDN'T SEE IT COMING. IF YOU TOLD ME SWEEPS AGO YOU AND HE...

KARKAT: I WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT. LIKE IF THE WRITING WAS ON THE WALL THERE, I SURE AS FUCK DIDN'T READ IT.

TEREZI: Y34H, 1T SNUCK UP ON M3

TEREZI: 1T D1DNT H3LP TH4T H3 T3RROR1Z3D US WH3N W3 W3R3 H1D1NG FROM J4CK

TEREZI: R1GHT UND3R MY NOS3 TOO

TEREZI: SOM3HOW 1 D1DNT PUT TH3 P13C3S TOG3TH3R 4T TH3 T1M3 4ND L3T H1M G3T 4W4Y W1TH MURD3R

TEREZI: 4ND GR4DU4LLY 1 ST4RT3D H4V1NG TH3S3 UNCONTROLL4BL3 THOUGHTS 4BOUT H1M

TEREZI: D4RK THOUGHTS

TEREZI: 4ND WH3N 1 WOULD C4TCH 4 WH1FF OF H1M 1N TH3 CORR1DORS, L1K3 H3 W4S T4UNT1NG M3, TH4T JUST F4NN3D TH3 FL4M3S

TEREZI: TH3N W3 ST4RT3D T4LK1NG SH1T W1TH 34CH OTH3R MOR3 4ND MOR3

TEREZI: 4ND H3 W4S SO MUCH N4ST13R TH4N H3 3V3R US3D TO B3! W4Y MOR3 TH4N 4NY OF OUR FR13NDS 3V3R W3R3

TEREZI: ON3 T1M3 H3 ST4RT3D MOCK1NG MY BL1NDN3SS

TEREZI: WH1CH N3V3R BOTH3R3D M3 WH3N 4NYON3 3LS3 D1D 1T

TEREZI: BUT SOM3HOW, TH3 STUFF H3 S41D...

TEREZI: 1 L3T 1T G3T UND3R MY SK1N

TEREZI: 4ND COMB1N3D W1TH M33T1NG 4 LOT OF N3W P3OPL3 1 F3LT L1K3 1 COULDNT L1V3 UP TO

TEREZI: TH4TS WH3N 1 ST4RT3D R3CONS1D3R1NG 4R4N34S OFF3R

KARKAT: I KNEW IT!

KARKAT: I KNEW HE MUST HAVE HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT DECISION. THAT SLIMY BASTARD.

KARKAT: THIS IS MOSTLY MY FAULT. I WASN'T VIGILANT ENOUGH WITH HIM, AND I LET OUR MOIRALLEGIANCE BREAK DOWN.

KARKAT: IF I KEPT A CLOSER EYE ON HIM, MAYBE HE WOULDN'T HAVE LURED YOU INTO HIS SPINNING TENT OF SHIT.

TEREZI: NO, YOU SHOULDNT F33L L1K3...

KARKAT: OR MAYBE IT'S KANAYA'S FAULT? SHE'S ALWAYS BEEN A REALLY GOOD AUSPISTICE. MAYBE SHE COULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS, IF SHE WASN'T SO PREOCCUPIED HERSELF.

KARKAT: NO WAIT! IT'S ACTUALLY MY FAULT AGAIN! IF I HAD BEEN ON THE BALL AND AUSPISTICIZED BETWEEN HER AND ROSE, SHE WOULD HAVE HAD THE TIME TO AUSPISTICIZE BETWEEN YOU AND GAMZEE!

KARKAT: DAMMIT, I ALWAYS SAY I KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT ROMANCE, YET I ROUTINELY UNDERESTIMATE ITS COMPLEXITY, SO I ONLY FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO AFTER IT'S WAY TOO LATE!

KARKAT: GOD I'M SO STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID

TEREZI: BL4RG SHUT UP!

TEREZI: 1TS NO ON3S F4ULT BUT M1N3!

TEREZI: 1M TH3 ON3 WHO H4S TO D34L W1TH 1T

KARKAT: YEAH OK.

KARKAT: FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, HE'LL PROBABLY JUST BREAK IT OFF AND LEAVE YOU ONCE WE GET TO THE NEW SESSION.

KARKAT: ALL HIS LOYALTIES AND PRIORITIES ARE TOTALLY WARPED NOW. I'M NOT SURE WHAT HE REALLY CARES ABOUT ANYMORE, BUT IT SURE ISN'T ANY OF US.

TEREZI: YOU TH1NK

TEREZI: H3 W1LL L34V3 M3?

KARKAT: YEAH. I DO.

TEREZI: *SOB!!!*

KARKAT: WHOA, WHAT??

KARKAT: ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

TEREZI: NO!

TEREZI: 1D B3 D3V4ST4T3D 1F H3 JUST

TEREZI: SUDD3NLY D1TCH3D M3 L1K3 TH4T

KARKAT: OK, HELP ME OUT!

KARKAT: YOU'RE CONFUSING ME HERE.

TEREZI: 1D F33L P4TH3T1C!!!

TEREZI: 4ND 1 GU3SS

TEREZI: 4 S1CK 4ND T3RR1BL3 P4RT OF M3 DO3SNT W4NT H1M TO GO

TEREZI: BUT 1F H3 DO3S 1 W4NT 1T TO B3 B3C4US3 1 T3LL H1M 1TS OV3R!

KARKAT: WOW.

KARKAT: ALRIGHT, I GUESS THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY.

KARKAT: I'M JUST TRYING TO BE SUPPORTIVE HERE.

KARKAT: BUT I'M NOT ALWAYS SURE WHAT THE RIGHT THING TO SAY IS!

KARKAT: I'M DOING MY FUCKING BEST. THIS IS COMPLICATED FOR ME TOO, YOU'RE BOTH MY FRIENDS.

TEREZI: 1 KNOW

TEREZI: 1 4PPR3C14T3 YOUR 1NT3NT1ONS K4RK4T

TEREZI: M4YB3

TEREZI: M4YB3 1T WOULD B3 B3TT3R 1F YOU W3R3NT S1TT1NG UP TH3R3 1N TH4T B4CKW4RDS CH41R WH1L3 YOU T4LK3D TO M3?

KARKAT: WHAT?

KARKAT: WHY??

DAVE: yeah dude you should probably ditch the chair

KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH MY CHAIR.

DAVE: or at least sit on it frontways

DAVE: or offer her another chair?

DAVE: i dunno its kind of a dumb affectation in this context

KARKAT: NO, LOOK. IT'S CASUAL AND RELAXED.

KARKAT: LIKE, IT VISUALLY CONVEYS THAT MY PRESENCE IN THE CONVERSATION IS HUMBLE AND NONTHREATENING, YET FRANK AND ATTENTIVE.

KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

DAVE: to sit on the goddamn floor

KARKAT: WHY SHOULD I SQUAT ON THE DIRTY FLOOR, WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE!

DAVE: so you can be on the same vertical plane with your friend while you exhibit compassion for her grody clown problem

TEREZI: D4V3 1TS F1N3

TEREZI: N3V3R M1ND 4BOUT TH3 CH41R, 1 DONT C4R3

TEREZI: 1T JUST STRUCK M3 4S 4 B1T D1STR4CT1NGLY S1LLY, TH4TS 4LL

KARKAT: OK, WOW, FINE!

KARKAT: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED!

KARKAT: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF CREATURE COMFORT YOU SUPPLY!!!

DAVE: karkat just threw a tantrum about a chair

DAVE: i just won karkat tantrum bingo

KARKAT: AT LAST!

KARKAT: WE ARE FREE FROM THE ACCURSED INSTRUMENT OF ASS ELEVATION!

DAVE: where did you even get that chair

DAVE: did you steal it from the common area

KARKAT: UNLIKE EVERYONE ELSE EVER, I HAPPEN TO MAKE A PRACTICE OF CAPTCHALOGUING ITEMS WHICH MIGHT BE CONVENIENT ON A DAY TO DAY BASIS.

KARKAT: SAY I'M STROLLING AROUND AND FIND MYSELF IN NEED OF A PLACE TO SIT? BAM. SUDDENLY, A CHAIR.

KARKAT: AND NO I DIDN'T STEAL IT.

KARKAT: HOW COULD I STEAL SOMETHING FROM THE COMMON AREA? NOBODY ACTUALLY OWNS ANY OF THAT FUCKING FURNITURE.

KARKAT: THAT'S WHY IT'S CALLED THE *COMMON* AREA, YOU ACCUSATORY PIECE OF FILTH.

DAVE: sounds like communism

DAVE: are you a communist or something

DAVE: actually that makes perfect sense what with your sickle and all

KARKAT: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??

DAVE: wait john has a hammer oh shit its all adding up

DAVE: when we arrive are you going to team up with john and seize the means of production

KARKAT: YOU APPEAR TO BE JUMPSTARTING A FACETIOUS DISCUSSION ABOUT SOME SORT OF HUMAN ECONOMIC IDEOLOGICAL FRAMEWORK, WITHOUT HAVING THE SLIGHTEST CLUE THAT YOUR VEHICLE IS PARKED SQUARELY IN THE NOBODY GIVES A FUCK ZONE.

DAVE: im just saying

DAVE: first chairs what next

DAVE: see i am all about private property and pocketing dough

DAVE: do you have any idea how rich i am

DAVE: i am a man of MEANS motherfucker

KARKAT: WHAT IS YOUR POINT?

DAVE: just dont come after my boonies dude

DAVE: or should i say karkat marx

KARKAT: YOU AREN'T BEING SERIOUS NOW!

KARKAT: THESE ARE NOT THE WORDS OF A SERIOUS PERSON.

KARKAT: I WAS HAVING A *SERIOUS DISCUSSION* LIKE A *BIG TIME ADULT* WITH MY GOOD FRIEND TEREZI.

KARKAT: YOUR CALLOUS AND NONSENSICAL REMARKS ARE DERAILING US FROM THE DELICATE SUBJECT AT HAND.

KARKAT: WHY DON'T YOU BE USEFUL AND SAY SOMETHING REASSURING TO OUR SAD MUTUAL BUDDY, YOU WAILING JET ENGINE OF INFANTILE STULTILOQUENCE??????

DAVE: i dont have much to say about this

DAVE: ive kinda got to recuse myself on the matter

DAVE: im all kinds of on record as being squicked out by the idea of hatelationships

DAVE: so i got no point of reference for gauging when one is fucked up the way thats normal for trolls or if its fucked up cause its actually fucked up and terrible

DAVE: this is like some ex alien boyfriend prime directive shit

DAVE: i cant intervene cause i dont know what im talking about

DAVE: but you do so i guess keep going

DAVE: you were saying some pretty good stuff before i started riding your jock about chairs

KARKAT: AUGH.

KARKAT: TEREZI, DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH??

KARKAT: ACTUALLY, I GUESS YOU CAN! YOU CAN NOW LITERALLY SEE WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH, AND EXPERIENCE ALL DUE EMPATHY FOR THE FACT THAT I HAVE A DOUCHE AS A BEST FRIEND!

TEREZI: Y3S, 1 C4N S33

TEREZI: TH3 V13W FROM H3R3 1S

TEREZI: DOUCH3T4CUL4R >:]

DAVE: thank you

KARKAT: SO THAT'S IT THEN

KARKAT: NO ADVICE AT ALL, SMARTALEC?

KARKAT: WHY DID I EVEN BRING YOU HERE FOR THIS INTERMISSION THEN.

DAVE: intermission?

KARKAT: INTERVENTION I MEAN. SORRY, I MISSPOKE.

DAVE: its not an intervention either

DAVE: my ghostly heads all beamin out of this crab for moral support yo

DAVE: i am in my homies corner even if he is a massive socialist

DAVE: terezi i think can probably figure this out

DAVE: she grew up alone and blind in a forest i think she will manage to bounce outta her juggalo phase

DAVE: but yeah terezi you should at least quit the fuckin soda

TEREZI: Y34H

TEREZI: OK

KARKAT: OK???

TEREZI: Y3S!

TEREZI: 1LL STOP

KARKAT: WHAT. JUST LIKE THAT?!

TEREZI: SUR3

TEREZI: 1TS R34LLY GROSS >X[

KARKAT: I THINK WE ARE MISSING THE POINT HERE.

KARKAT: THIS ISN'T JUST ABOUT AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH A FOUL SOFT DRINK.

KARKAT: IT'S ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF.

KARKAT: YOU ARE BARELY FUNCTIONAL RIGHT NOW. YOU CAN'T EVEN PICK YOURSELF UP OFF THE FLOOR AND PUT ON A PAIR OF PANTS.

KARKAT: REMEMBER PANTS TEREZI?? YOU USED TO LOVE PANTS!

TEREZI: Y34H, P4NTS 4R3 PR3TTY GR34T

KARKAT: YOU USED TO...

KARKAT: YOU USED TO BE A LOT OF THINGS. AND ALL OF THOSE WERE GOOD THINGS.

KARKAT: BUT NOW THAT WE'RE ABOUT TO ARRIVE, RIGHT WHEN WE NEED YOU THE MOST, YOU DO A SENSATIONAL BELLYFLOP INTO A CIRCUS VAT OF YOUR OWN TANGY SLOBBER.

TEREZI: OH PL34S3

TEREZI: WH4T COULD YOU POSS1BLY N33D M3 FOR?

KARKAT: YOU'RE AN IMPORTANT MEMBER OF THIS PARTY!

KARKAT: WE'LL NEED YOU TO HELP STAND UP TO JACK, AND WHATEVER ELSE IS WAITING FOR US THERE.

TEREZI: 1 DONT TH1NK 1 W1LL B3 V3RY US3FUL

KARKAT: WELL, NOT LIKE THIS YOU WON'T. YOU'VE GOT TO GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER.

TEREZI: NO! 1 M34N

TEREZI: 3V3N TH3N 1 WONT B3

TEREZI: 1 DONT H4V3 MUCH TO OFF3R 3V3N ON MY B3ST D4Y

KARKAT: WHAT ABOUT YOUR MIND POWERS THOUGH!

KARKAT: WHAT IF WE NEED SOMEBODY WITH MIND POWERS? TO DO SOME SORT OF...

KARKAT: MINDY THING.

TEREZI: WH4T M1ND POW3RS??

KARKAT: YOU KNOW. THE ONES WHERE YOU...

KARKAT: FLIP A COIN. AND...

KARKAT: SOMETHING CRAZY HAPPENS.

KARKAT: OK, I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW HOW IT WORKS. BUT WHAT ABOUT THAT?

TEREZI: PFFF

TEREZI: 1 N3V3R D3V3LOP3D THOS3 POW3RS V3RY W3LL

TEREZI: 4ND 1TS B33N 4 LONG T1M3 S1NC3 1 3V3N THOUGHT 4BOUT TH3M

TEREZI: 1 DONT TH1NK TH3YR3 V3RY V4LU4BL3 HON3STLY

TEREZI: 1N F4CT 4LL TH3Y 3V3R S33M3D TO DO W4S TR1CK M3 1NTO F33L1NG L1K3 1 KN3W WH4T 1 W4S DO1NG

TEREZI: TH3Y 4CTU4LLY M4D3 M3 B3L13V3 1 W4S 1N CONTROL OF OTH3R P3OPL3S F4T3S

TEREZI: NOT 3V3N TO SP34K OF MY OWN

TEREZI: 1T W4S 4 R34LLY D4NG3ROUS K1ND OF D3LUS1ON

TEREZI: 4ND NOW 1T F33LS L1K3 TH3 ONLY "H3RO1C" TH1NG 1 3V3R D1D W1TH THOS3 POW3RS

TEREZI: W4S US3 TH3M TO JUST1FY K1LL1NG MY FR13ND

KARKAT: HUH?

TEREZI: ...

KARKAT: OH.

KARKAT: RIGHT.

TEREZI: 4ND WH4TS WORS3 1S

TEREZI: TO TH1S D4Y, 1M ST1LL NOT 3V3N TOT4LLY SUR3 1F 1T W4S N3C3SS4RY

TEREZI: 1 TH1NK 1V3 LOST TH3 4B1L1TY TO T3LL 1F 1M B31NG PUN1SH3D FOR WH4T 1 D1D, OR 1F 1 4M PUN1SH1NG MYS3LF

KARKAT: WELL, YEAH. OF COURSE IT WAS NECESSARY.

KARKAT: EVEN IF IT WASN'T THE MORALLY RIGHT CHOICE OR WHATEVER, IT WAS OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING THAT HAD TO HAPPEN.

KARKAT: THAT'S THE CRUEL THING ABOUT PARADOX SPACE. IT SYSTEMICALLY VALIDATES ALL YOUR MISTAKES AS NECESSARY OUTCOMES.

KARKAT: NOT EVEN NECESSARY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD OR PERSONAL GROWTH. IT'S ALWAYS BIGGER THAN YOU. LIKE YOUR ERRORS IN JUDGMENT ARE INSEPARABLE FROM THE WAY REALITY HAS TO UNFOLD.

KARKAT: SO IT NEVER LETS YOU FORGET ABOUT THEM. BECAUSE THEY WERE ALL CRITICAL TO THE BIG PICTURE, AND ALL YOUR PAST FLAWS ARE LIKE...

KARKAT: SCARS.

KARKAT: SCARS IN SPACETIME THAT NEVER HEAL, AND ALWAYS SERVE TO REMIND YOU THAT THE PERFECT VERSION OF YOURSELF YOU WISH YOU COULD BE CAN NEVER EXIST. BECAUSE THE SURVIVAL OF EVERYONE YOU CARE ABOUT DEPENDS ON HIM NOT EXISTING.

TEREZI: 1 KNOW 4LL TH4T

TEREZI: 1T DO3SNT STOP M3 FROM WOND3R1NG

KARKAT: IT'S SIMPLE. IF YOU HADN'T KILLED HER, YOU WOULD HAVE WITHERED AWAY IN A DOOMED TIMELINE.

TEREZI: Y34H! 4ND SOM3T1M3S 1 W1SH 1 H4D!

TEREZI: 4T TH1S PO1NT 1 TH1NK 1 WOULD R4TH3R B3 TH3 B3TT3R P3RSON WHO M4D3 TH3 R1GHT D3C1S1ON

TEREZI: 3V3N 1F 1T 4LSO M34NT B31NG TH3 ON3 TO F4D3 4W4Y FOR3V3R

KARKAT: WELL, *I* WOULDN'T WANT THAT!

KARKAT: DOES THAT FUCKING MATTER TO YOU?

KARKAT: DOES THAT FACTOR ANYWHERE INTO YOUR DREARY EXISTENTIAL EQUATION???

TEREZI: YOU PROB4BLY TH1NK 1M CR4ZY

TEREZI: JUST 4S CR4ZY 4S YOU TH1NK 1 4M FOR D4T1NG G4MZ33

TEREZI: BUT

TEREZI: 1 R34LLY M1SS H3R

KARKAT: NO

KARKAT: I DON'T THINK YOU'RE CRAZY FOR THAT.

TEREZI: 4ND Y3T

TEREZI: 1F 1 3V3R S4W H3R 4G41N

TEREZI: TH3R3S NO W4Y 1 COULD T4LK TO H3R

TEREZI: SO P4RT OF M3 HOP3S 1 N3V3R-

TEREZI: OW!!!!!!!

TEREZI: D4V3, YOU D1CK!!!

DAVE: what

DAVE: dont blame me

DAVE: i cant control the crab

[insanepoll]

[ID: white slide with a picture of goro akechi with a transparent background taking up almost all of the page. behind him, there is a submission that can’t be completely seen bc of the picture of goro, but reads:

hes literally so insane and so so stupid omg, like this guy has dedicated so much of his life to getting revenge on his dad, and his whole plan was to fucking work for him and help him achieve his goal of being prime minister and then tell him "oh yeah btw im your illegitimate son that you abandoned how does it feel to know that you only got here bc of me loser" like dude????? thats a shit plan what are you on????? and like he was so focused in on this stupid ass plan that when his dad started ordering him to kill people for political reasons he was just like "welp no turning back now" like dude??????? (to be fair his dad wouldve probs killed him he disobeyed but uhhhh yeah my point still stands this teenager is not mentally stable AT ALL)

he hides behind masks like CONSTANTLY too like obvi he pretends to be a good little lackey for his dad, but like he's also a celebrity (he's a highschool detective, girls think he's hot i guess)(and i guess he is actually kinda smart cuz hes a good detective but like my point still stands that hes so fucking stupid at the same time like. my god.) he like puts on this whole goody-two-shoes shtick that the media and all his fangirls are SO in love with but like hes not like that at all hes so fucking unhinged deep down like holy shit

when you get confront him in the second to last palace he tries to fucking kill akira(the main character) and his friends but like its mostly abt akira specifically??? and like dude calm the fuck down WHY are you so bloodthirsty man, i know you wanna kill akira and rip him apart, i know you despise him because you're jealous of him, i knowwwwww dude god and when you get him as a party member in the secret third semester section of the game he is just so fucking unhinged

in the battle segments just goes on and on about how the shadows are weaklings and hes gonna have so much fun ripping them to shreds hes so bloodthirst and unhinged you dont understand

OH OH AND HES GAY AS HELL DID I MENTION THAT his whole relationship with the mc is so homoerotic my god dude and the only thing stopping them from getting together is the sheer force of goro's emotional contipation ohhhhhh my god dude your just jealous of him!!!! thats not what hatred is dude!!! you fully enjoy akira's company and cherish his companionship! you showed him your favorite place to go, somewhere youve never shown to anyone! you went to a cafe together! you shared your tragic backstory with him while you two BATHED TOGETHER ALONE! you couldve killed him or arrested him for being a phantom thief a long time ago but you kept hanging out with him!!!!!! he kept your glove! he almost surrendered to a fabricated reality just so you could live!!!!! the only reason he didnt is because he knew you wouldnt want to live under someone else's control!!!!!

sorry this became a shuake rant at the end in conclusion, he may be every good at hiding it but he is in fact incredibly unhinged anyway if you wanna see him being unhinged in action here's some videos for you viewing pleasure: (the cutscenes are the important parts, timestamps are 0:00, 8:43, 10:50, 21:30(ok this cutscene doesnt show him being unhinged but it is important to me that you see it)) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tVAekUc-lg (most of the quotes after 7:02 are unhinged but feel free to listen to the whole thing if you wanna see the difference between the real him and the good boy facade) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IygJD2Et74E&t=4s

/End ID.]

[tori-reacts]

my review of jojo’s bizarre adventure: diamond is unbreakable

hi everyone! yesterday i finished part 4 of jojos and it was rly fun so i figured I’d do a little mini review of what i thought!

character analysis

ok so I’m just gonna run through the main cast of characters bc it would take way to long to do everyone haha

1. higashikata josuke

josuke being the main protagonist of part 4 fit so perfectly. i felt like he had a great balance between the two previous jojos, he had the silliness of joseph but could get serious like jotaro in a fight. i would say he ranks number 3 on my favorite jojos protagonists (1 being jotaro and 2 being Joseph) but i did enjoy his character a lot! there were just others in the season that stuck out to me more.

2. nijimura okuyasu

what a lovely jobro. i enjoyed this character so fucking much. i always love the kind of dumb characters and he’s a perfect example LOL. i also just loved seeing his character develop into someone independent from his brother. he also delivered some of the funniest moments in the part.

3. hirose koichi

an adorable boy we must protect. i love koichi sm you guys. echoes 3 is hilarious. this is just an all around great character he’s genuinely a wonderful person and tends to see the best in people. he’s also just so reliable

4. kujo jotaro

ok I’m gonna start my saying I’m so bias towards this man being he is my favorite jojo and favorite character in general. but i did rly enjoy seeing him again in this part. he took a bit of a back seat to let josuke shine, but he still DELIVERED that final blow which I’m gonna talk abt a little later.

5. kishibe rohan

i love this man so much. would do anything for him. beautiful boy. he’s pretty and driven and has a bit of sass. perfect 10/10.

6. joseph joestar

Joseph was a major side character in this one but i did enjoy his usual antics. my opinion of him is a bit lower after the whole cheating on his wife thing, but i feel like the main reasoning was just so araki could introduce another jojo so i try not to think of it too much. but i absolutely love the va in this part, i haven’t done my research but he sounds exactly like kizaru from one piece aka my favorite marine. so that was great. also the way he just TOOK the baby at the end. like oh yeah we couldn’t find the mother (did they even look???) so i just took this thing overseas with me. classic Joseph

7. yamagishi yukako

one of the most interesting characters. female characters aren’t very prominent so far in this series so she was definitely a stand out. and the CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. seeing her grow from the obsessive control freak she was in the beginning to a genuinely loving person was beautiful. i throughly enjoyed the redemption episodes with the Cinderella salon. and koichi was just a sweetheart there too.

8. kira yoshikage

phenomenal writing. this man was GENUINELY terrifying. god during that bath scene and the entire sequence of bites the dust genuinely had me just as afraid as little hayato. up until the “when i first saw the Mona Lisa i had an erection” moment, that man did not fail to frighten me. all the past main antagonists being dio and kars had some silliness (in dios case A LOT) so it was easier to not take them seriously but this guy???? wow.

favorite moments

1. the Italian restaurant

fucking hilarious. one of the best episodes of the whole season imo.

2. Joseph buys the entire fucking baby store

god help him

3. the detail of rohan being there the night reimi was murdered

tugged at the heartstrings. also later on when he said he’ll miss her, breaking his arrogant facade. beautiful.

4. Cinderella salon

i mentioned this earlier but i loved this whole episode. the development between koichi and yukako was so much fun to watch.

5. the first encounter with Kira yoshikage

these few episodes were insanely creepy but set the stage for part 4s main antagonist perfectly. Being backed into a corner just to take the identity of another truly just had my adrenaline rushing

6. The bites the dust sequence

as mentioned before, this was just a masterpiece. psychologically terrifying, we are put directly in the POV of hayato and feel every bit of fear and despair he does. May i also say i was absolutely horrified before they revealed this ability bc i truly thought Rohan died.

7. star platinum ZA WARUDO

yeah. this was so needed. the entire final fight i was just dying to see jotaro show up and kick some ass. and when it finally happened it was SO satisfying. ora ora bitch.

8. reimi sends kira straight to hell

UGH I LOVED IT i cant even rly put into words u just need to watch it

andddd that about does it. this is my second favorite part so far, stardust crusaders still has a very special place in my heart. but i enjoyed this season nonetheless. i am about 7 episodes into part 5 now, so when I’m done with that one expect a review!! until then…