#Gotta be up in six hours

[sideblogforcrimpy-plus]

Rinse; Repeat

Words: 4,478, chapter one of probably two.

Rated: Handle with care, cw suicidal thoughts/discussion, canon typical violence, hints at abuse/bullying

Summary: Spencer and Derek meet before either of them are in the BAU. Spencer is hesitant as a deer to be close and all Derek wants is to be close (so does Spencer). Spencer is clearly Troubled and Derek just wants to love him softly, honestly. Like filtered afternoon sunlight and sepia filters.

but for real I just, I saw a post that made me laugh and go 'ahaha, unless?' and then sat down uncomfortably on the floor for three hours and wrote this.

For my own comfort/entertainment, Derek and Spencer are closer in age than my recent google search would lead me to believe. Thank (●'◡'●)

---- 2003

Derek was having a truly sucky day. The academy was rough, and as good as he was at all the physical stuff, there were some real smart people and he was so scared that he was all brawn and no brain. Not that he’d readily use the word ‘scared’ to describe himself if he could help it, but he was.

But realistically, he did get this far. So he did have some of the brain, but was it enough? Had he set his sights too high on the BAU?

Still, the doubt and insecurity wasn’t going to have him quit early. Partly because he really, really wanted this, but also partly because what would he tell his family if he’d put so much time into this and failed?

They’d comfort him and say they’re proud; he knows it. But would he be proud?

He doesn’t want to find out.

Dead tired despite the lack of physical training that day, he walked through the house and out to the balcony, only part stopping to shed his jacket and backpack.

The sun was long gone by now, and the stars were too hidden in such a built up area, but he braced himself with his arms on the railing and stretched his neck, trying to relax.

God, how many people even got through the academy each year?

“Chances are, if you’re already in the academy, you’ll come out the other side.”

God?

Had he asked that aloud?

Derek just about jumped out of his skin, training be damned. He was on the top floor and roof access was blocked. He must have made some sort of noise, because the sad, quiet voice came again.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“I’m not- I wasn’t… Startled.” Derek rubbed his forehead, hoping his voice didn’t sound it; startled. He wasn’t sure he’d heard that organically in conversation, more something you come across in text, in books and things.

“Oh. Sorry for assuming?” The speaker was hesitant, like they’d started apologising before they really knew why. Curious, and not thrilled someone had roof access and it wasn’t the guy (and his sister) who had the top floor apartment, Derek leaned out over the railing and twisted his neck, trying to see who answered him.

Before he could get a glimpse, he heard them step back.

How close to the edge was he? He watched as a bit of rubble fell past him and to the concrete below.

“I don’t think that’s something you need to apologise for, man. How’d you get up there, anyway? I was told we weren’t allowed because they don’t have railings. Or insurance, I think.”

“Well, that makes sense. Although a fall from a five story building isn’t guaranteed to be fatal; you’re better off on the eighth floor for that. But then again, there have been people that survived from even that height so, you can’t really win, can you? If you’re scared of heights or something.”

Derek’s curiosity took a quick dive into concern that sped right down to worry.

“Now I think you got that the wrong way around, better off on the lower floors if there’s no railing, right?”

There was a long pause, and Derek wondered if he’d be able to get up onto the roof in a reasonable amount of time if he had a sense of urgency pushing him.

“Perhaps. Can you imagine the injuries you’d be left with after surviving the fall?” He heard a foot scuff the ground above him and thought he’d started sweating despite the cool breeze. “It’d really suck to not have insurance then, huh? As the building owner, I mean.”

“Okay man, well, that’s a dark topic. And since there’s no railing, or maybe no seats up there either, why don’t you join me on my balcony instead? I might even be able to find a beer or something for you.”

“It’s not safe to go into a stranger’s house.”

“It’s not safe to think about people surviving and not surviving falls while you’re alone on a rooftop, close to the edge, and there’s no railing.”

“Well… Perhaps that’s a reasonable counterpoint.”

And that’s how Derek started becoming friends with a bundle of limbs and greasy hair that hid an incredible but haunted mind.

–

Spencer didn’t have a phone, so he’d just show up at Derek’s apartment intermittently. Well, his and Sarah’s. His mother had put money towards them renting it for the duration of Derek’s time at the academy and Sarah’s short term study since they lined up almost the same, with him likely finding some place more permanent for himself after.

He didn’t do well in the claustrophobic, shared dorms of the academy so would escape to the apartment when he could, and Sarah was completing her course close enough to make the apartment almost worth it. 

It had two shoebox rooms, and they had to share a bathroom, but it still had two rooms so it was a step up from the low bar the academy set. But she was out often with friends, study, and a part time job while he was still largely sleeping at the dorm, so they hardly saw each other.

He’d come back to Spencer hanging out near the block only a couple times; he didn’t seem to like loitering, like he was concerned Derek’s neighbours would get suspicious.

More often, though, Derek would go out onto the balcony and make some sort of noise, and Spencer would respond from above. Over time, Derek was relieved to note that Spencer was usually not so close to the edge as he was the first night.

But most of the time, unfortunately, was not all of the time.

Spencer wasn’t all that interested in drinking, but he was interested in sharing whatever he’d learned about recently. He absolutely did not share much about himself at all.

Despite how private Derek felt as a person though, he found he was sharing quite a lot about himself with Spencer. It was hard not to, inviting Spencer into a place he and his sister were living in though. She’d met him in passing once or twice, and had commented after he left, thankfully, about how shy he seemed to be.

Spencer was a bit like butter from the fridge; he needed time to soften up every single time he came over to Derek’s.

His most recent obsession, to Derek's suffering, had been body farms. After finding out that Derek was studying at the academy (which he was loath to share on account of those ever-present insecurities), Spencer had told him that he was interested in criminal behaviour, among other related things.

Not in a ‘watch true crime documentaries just for the nightmares, apparently’ kind of way, but more to work out the why, and sometimes guess at the how, of everything. He’d dropped stupid time into geographical profiling, in Derek’s opinion, for someone who wasn’t pursuing a career in a related field.

“And they have one, a body farm that is, in East Tennessee. Did you know that they run ten week courses there? Something they’ve done recently is watching for changes in hair for a body left in a car for two months. That’s so specific, isn’t it? Hair changes in a car? Although it’s safe to assume they’re obviously looking for more at the same time.”

“Obviously,” Derek agreed.

Spencer was way too excited for the topic at hand.

Derek continued before Spencer went back to talking about something like maggot life cycles. “Okay, so if I get through to being an FBI agent and I see a body in a car, you’ll be the first person I call.”

“You mean when. I don’t have a phone.” Spencer’s lips had a little curve, like he was self-conscious of smiling still but couldn’t help it fully.

“Right, right. Can you tell me how to summon you then, or will I just have to come here and call out at the roof until you appear?”

Now that was definitely a smile. Why did that feel just as good as high test scores?

The next time Derek was at the apartment, Spencer didn’t show. But there was a phone number written on a paper plane that had been thrown onto his balcony. Three, actually, and one he picked up on the way to the apartment that was stuck in a sad, over-pruned and under-watered hedge out front. How many had Spencer made that Derek didn’t find?

Eleven, it turns out. Spencer was a horrible shot, but Derek liked watching his long fingers folding the paper in what was ‘the most aerodynamic plane folding method’ the next time he was over. It felt a little silly to challenge him on it, especially since Derek knew fuck all about the aerodynamics of paper planes. And Spencer called him out on it.

“Superior hand-eye coordination doesn’t mean your plane folding method is superior, it just means you’re good with your hands.”

Derek wiggled his eyebrows, but continued speaking after he let the flush of Spencer’s cheeks sit for a moment.

“So you want me to throw one of yours, to see if I can do it better with your method?”

“It’s a reasonable request. You can’t test two theories for quality results if the testing methods are different.”

“You’re a sore loser, you know that?”

“You’re an unfair winner, did you know that?”

“So you admit I’m a winner?”

Spencer felt terrible that his next plane hit Derek in the eye, so Derek only milked it for half the time he would have liked to.

Spencer shoved his shoulder when Derek finally caved and laughed, indignant.

“You were playing it up!”

“It’s paper! It can’t hurt me that bad.”

“It did hit your eye. They might be the fastest healing body part, but they’re not impervious.”

“Pretty boy, if you want to kiss it better, I won’t stop you. But you don’t need to worry that much about it.”

Derek saw that sweet rush of colour on Spencer’s neck and cheeks, and the smile he was trying to hide before now took a shy edge as he tried to look casual.

“Well, if I injured you, I should do what I can to help.”

His voice was so quiet that Derek almost missed what he said. He tilted his head in question, raising a brow while trying to figure out if this was more word-based flirting or if one of them would actually take it further for once.

Spencer’s eyes were focused on his fingers, picking at lint that certainly wasn’t on the leg of his pants but held his gaze anyway. His eyes flickered up to Derek’s face though, and his tongue darted out to wet his lips just after.

“Well, you’re the doctor out of the two of us, what do you think I need?”

“I’m not a medical doctor.” Spencer’s voice seemed to be getting quieter, but Derek liked that his gaze was flicking more to Derek’s lips now.

“Maybe so, but I bet you know more about first aid than I do, especially with that fear of germs you got.”

“Me not shaking your hand is normal. The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss.”

Derek almost laughed at how embarrassed Spencer looked at that line, but knew if he did Spencer would think he was laughing at him and might take offense.

“So I should kiss you goodbye when you leave? Doctor Reid, who knew you could be so forward?”

“That’s not what I was saying! I just-”

Derek held up his hands, placating, while Spencer seemed to flap his. “Now now handsome, I didn’t say I was opposed.”

Derek thought he was floating when Spencer, so quickly it was barely a kiss, pressed his lips to Derek’s cheek when he left that night.

–

The next time Derek heard Spencer’s voice from above his balcony, he was almost back to his subdued, distanced self from when they first started speaking. It was over an hour before Spencer let Derek coax him inside. He was shocked when Spencer came to his front door, hair lank and pulled forward to try and cover his eye and cheek that were dark with bruising.

“Spencer, what happened?” He ushered the younger man in, directing him to the couch.

“Nothing. An accident. What were you saying about the fitness test?”

“You’re not interested in fitness tests, what happened?” He tried to bring his hand up to Spencer’s cheek, tilt his head up into the light and assess the damage, but Spencer shied away from him, getting up and heading to the kitchen instead.

“I’m interested in the fitness test.”

“I’m not. Since when are you interested in that?”

“Since you’re the one talking about them.” Derek tried not to feel warm and fuzzy with that comment. Spencer was being genuine, the man was a terrible liar, but he gives away shy truths when he wants to distract.

Derek leaned against the tiny kitchen counter while Spencer turned the kettle on.

“I thought you didn’t have tea at night because of the caffeine.”

“Well, I don’t think I’ll sleep tonight anyway, so I may as well enjoy a tea.”

Derek scrutinised him, wordlessly getting a still sealed pack of decaf tea from the cupboard and putting it down beside Spencer’s hand on the counter.

“You know this isn’t truly decaffeinated? It’s just lower in comparison to other teas.”

Derek stayed quiet and watched as Spencer started to squirm under his gaze. He turned then to face Derek, a frown on his face that softened when he saw whatever emotion Derek’s expression wasn’t hiding. Concern, probably.

“I thought you said you wouldn’t use your behavioural training on me.”

“I thought I wouldn’t feel the need to with you.”

Spencer’s lips pressed into a thin line before he turned back to the kettle, mumbling. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

When Derek put his hand on Spencer’s shoulder, Spencer jumped, then looked guilty.

“Sorry. I don’t-” He looked at Derek’s hand, which he’d pulled back like he'd been burnt when Spencer flinched at his touch. “I don’t mind.” He wrung his hands, nervous or something like it and unable to look at Derek with that soft red on his cheeks again, marred by bruises. “I don’t mind. The contact, if it’s you. But I’d rather not be surprised by it just now.”

“I get it, pretty boy, and I’m sorry.” He held out his hands, palms up, for Spencer to take. Spencer’s hands shook a little, and he’d forgotten to pour water into his mug now.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay, I won’t ask how you got- that.” He jutted his chin to try and gesture at Spencer’s purpled skin while his hands were occupied. “But is what I see all you have, or is there more?”

Spencer bit his lip, watching his own thumb as he rubbed it against Derek’s fingers.

“Spencer, please.”

Spencer shrugged, still unwilling to meet Derek’s eyes.

“It’s not just that. My face. It’s-...” He lifted their joined hands, but didn’t let go of Derek’s to gesture any better. Instead, he pressed their hands to Derek’s chest, just beneath the collar of his shirt, then slowly moved them down and around a little to Derek’s sides. The movement was awkward, but Derek appreciated the tight grip on his hands, and the touch Spencer was initiating, and the information being shared all in the way Spencer was capable of.

“It’s all over, isn’t it pretty boy?”

Spencer hesitated, almost nodding before deciding to try and move on. “I don’t know if I qualify for that. Not normally, or especially now.”

The shy smile was back, and too self-deprecating for Derek. But fighting Spencer on that too strong right now would push him away, so he let some of that anger slide away before he spoke.

“You callin’ me a liar, handsome?”

“No, I think I’m calling you a sweet-talker.”

“But a lying sweet talker, hot stuff?” Spencer pursed his lips as he looked up at Derek, finally, to suppress a smile.

“I’m starting to think you have a biased opinion.”

“I’m starting to think you do too, although on the other side of the spectrum. Why are you so hard on yourself?” 

Spencer squeezed Derek’s hands before letting them go, turning back to pour hot water in his mug. Derek bit back a sigh when Spencer changed the subject again.

“So only two weeks before you’re done at the academy, huh?”

Throughout the night, as Spencer started melting into his more comfortable self the longer he was there, he was less aware of the bruising on his face. It wasn’t until he caught his reflection, or Derek staring, or felt it twinge when he smiled too wide, that he remembered it and grew self-conscious again. That he pushed his hair back in the way of it like if Derek couldn’t see it then Spencer could forget he was injured.

He’d foregone contact lenses and worn his glasses that night, like he did most nights, and Derek thought it might be so it felt like there was another barrier between his bruises and the rest of the world.

Derek wanted to kiss them better, and then all the other hurts Spencer seemed to have. And Spencer sure seemed to have a lot of hurts.

Hurts like how his expression tightened when Derek asked about his childhood, his parents, his friends, or his time at school. How Derek, in the earlier days, made a comment about Spencer missing social cues, and heard a bitter ‘well I can’t pick up on cues if I don’t have anyone to teach them to me’ in reply before Spencer tried to cover it up.

How if he had a particularly bad day, he was so jumpy near Derek that Derek almost wanted to sit on his hands to show he wasn’t going to use them for anything.

How on days when Spencer’s eyes were sunken with a lack of sleep, and the clothes he wore showed how thin he was, and he was so so close to the edge of the ledge on the roof above Derek’s apartment that he thought Spencer just might not care if he fell over the edge.

Like he’d had a lifetime of hurts and still had to face more each day, and Derek only saw little slivers of him and couldn’t learn enough to help him as much as Spencer needed; as much as Derek wanted.

God, he was going to make a terrible profiler.

“Derek?” Spencer looked hesitant, and Derek realised he’d spaced out; probably while staring at Spencer’s bruise again going by how he’d tried to angle his face away awkwardly, unable to fully turn and hide it while looking at Derek at the same time.

Derek couldn’t help it, he just kept on staring. Spencer’s tongue darted out to wet his lips again, and Derek’s eyes tracked the movement. He knew Spencer noticed that, too, by the way his breath seemed to stutter.

Slowly, he shuffled forward on the couch, eyes holding Spencer’s gaze as he did so.

This time, Derek’s name from Spencer’s lips was much quieter, like he was asking for something instead of questioning him.

“Spencer,” The younger man’s eyes dropped down, watching as Derek’s hand came up to his arm; his shoulder. Watched it still as it moved higher, cupping his unbruised cheek. Spencer turned his head, almost pressing a kiss to Derek’s palm as his eyes closed and his bruised cheek was fully on display.

“Spencer, I’ll be gentle. May I?”

Spencer didn’t open his eyes, just hummed in agreement, nosing at Derek’s palm. 

Goosebumps broke over Spencer’s neck when Derek’s breath hit his cheek, and Derek felt him shiver. Careful to avoid the worst of it, Derek skated his lips over Spencer’s cheekbone, pressed them just in front of where his earlobe met the back of his jaw, then trailed them down his jawline.

Spencer tipped his head, allowing easier access as Derek watched Spencer’s fingers grip the couch cushion beneath him. Unsure if it was entirely due to sensation or something going on in his mind, Derek didn’t push further. Using his hand on Spencer’s cheek, he turned the man’s head to nudge his nose to Spencer’s.

“This is alright?”

In lieu of an answer, slowly, Spencer lifted his chin and kissed Derek on the lips. Derek’s chest swelled and he smiled into it, his other hand coming up to Spencer’s side.

They shuffled closer to each other, to be able to press themselves into each other more comfortably. Spencer’s mouth opened beneath Derek’s lips, and he could taste that terrible decaf tea and honey, and the cashews Spencer liked to snack on while reading.

He wondered what Spencer would think he tasted like, the cheap vending machine snacks and the god awful protein water he’d bought without realising it was terrible.

Suddenly, he had the urge to brush his teeth. He made to pull away, but Spencer’s fingers curled in his shirt and his resolve weakened.

Their hands were slowly moving over each other, everything was moving so slowly. Sweetly, like they were learning each other and had all the time in the world. Derek’s fingers found the hem of Spencer’s shirt, and he tugged the man’s lower lip between his teeth as his fingers slipped under the fabric and brushed against Spencer’s skin.

God it was soft, but it felt thin, too. He became scared of hurting Spencer, especially when remembering he had some other injuries too. So he kept his touch light, fingers probably tickling as they travelled further up Spencer’s side as Spencer laughed into the kiss.

Spencer tugged at Derek’s collar, then his fingers slipped around to cup the back of Derek’s neck. Caught up in being able to touch, they quickly moved back down, trailing over his shoulder and down his chest, then Spencer’s hands lingered there. They would have moved further down, Derek thinks, with his hands now pushing Spencer’s shirt up, if it weren’t for his sister coming home.

They didn’t realise until they heard her laugh, surprised.

“Oh, Sorry! I didn’t text ahead, my phone died. Go about your business!” She laughed again, more of a giggle, then her bedroom door clicked shut. Spencer was rigid beneath him - when had he pressed Spencer into the couch beneath him?

‘Sorry, Spence, I didn’t-”

Spencer pushed him up and off, the heat flushing his face more than the usual shyness or what Derek might expect from making out on a couch could bring about. More than embarrassment of being caught, even. He scrambled to get up and right his clothes, walking to the door and scooping up his bag on the way.

“Spencer, wait! Where are you going?” He didn’t want to pull Spencer back by catching his arm, knowing the man wouldn’t react well. His eyes seemed watery and Derek was lost.

And he stayed lost, when, after three weeks, Spencer hadn’t come back. His texts went unanswered and when he called the number was disconnected.

And he kept right on being lost when Spencer didn’t come back to visit him before he had to move out.

–--- 2005

Derek scowled at the scene before them. 

“You’re saying someone was turning people into books?”

The local officer walking them through the scene nodded, nose wrinkled but face otherwise resigned.

“Yup. See, we had a couple people go missing here and there. Transients, runaways, you know the type. And we’d thought they went missing by choice. Sure, we looked,” not enough, Derek thought. “But we never thought they’d end up. Well. As books.”

“As books.” Derek’s skin crawled.

Aside from a specific wrinkle in his brow, Hotch didn’t even look perturbed. “These materials, would they be specialised? Potentially unique or traceable?”

“The tanning stuff? Not as far as we can tell. Out here, we got people doing this the normal way, tanning hides and such.  A lot of leather workers out here. As far as we can tell, it’s basically all the same stuff.”

Hotch looked back at Gideon who shrugged and looked at Derek. “He’ll take a breather now that we found his workshop; he’ll need time to set himself up again. Derek, you’re going to a library to speak to someone about human skin book binding.”

Derek and Elle looked at each other before Derek held his hands out, gesturing broadly.

“We just have someone who knows about human skin being made into books?”

Elle smirked at him. “And you get to visit them. How nice.”

Derek wasn’t thrilled about it, and the feeling that his skin was crawling and unclean hadn’t left since they found the workshop their unsub was using. It reeked in both usual and unexpected ways, and the forensic investigator on scene and all too happily told him that urine could be used in the tanning process.

Perhaps a clean, quiet, library would help in easing his mind, but the subject matter wouldn’t. Derek flashed his badge at the desk, and the librarian assistant he’d found nodded without him needing to explain.

“Agent Gideon called ahead, I’ll lead you through to the doctor now. The books were already here, we’ve held them for ages, but the doctor only arrived recently. Good timing, too, what with this horribleness happening.” She chattered as she led him through shelves, picking up carelessly placed books as she went and piling them up on her other arm.

“Wait, the doctor showed up for the books after the murders?” Derek frowned; Gideon hadn’t called that far ahead, had he?

“Yes, though it’s not his first time here. He’s such a joy to have.” She looked at Derek, then laughed. “You don’t think he did it, do you?”

Derek shrugged, and she shook her head. Then, they stopped outside a room labelled ‘staff only’, and she knocked before pushing the door open.

Derek patted down his pockets for his notepad and pen, then stopped short when he looked up.

The assistant kept talking.

“So this is the doctor Spencer Reid, the veritable specialist on these books. Our Margaret, who usually cares for these books and who we’d recommend you to normally for this, she’s been unwell. But we’re lucky to have Dr. Reid here,” After that, she looked between the two, and her smile slipped into confusion.

“Do you two know each other?”

Derek swallowed, and Spencer barely moved.

“Well, I’ll just leave you two to it, then.” She cast a hesitant glance at Spencer, who nodded to her, and she seemed to take that as a sign it was safe for her to leave them alone.

“Spencer?”

[junowritings]

Hii!! Would it be alright if i requested the companions of your choice (bg3) and Rolan reacting to meeting tav's older brother(or just sibling if youd like to keep it gender neutral!)? I had the image of him potentially running into them all in combat and just dashing in to help tav, everyone being so confused as to who the hell this guy is, only to find out their related. I think itd be even funnier if tav and their sibling were very different, or seeing tav with their sibling brought out a very different side than their used to. Maybe tavs very polite and awkward usually, but gets super playful and competitive (and maybe loses a few braincells) around their sibling. Tysm!! - 🍒

Thank you so much for the request cherry~! I honestly have a lot of fun imagining what it would be like if Tav had any family throughout the story so this was a neat write! I had to cut a couple characters bc this got to long but I do hope it was worth the wait~!

=======

Trouble seems to have a habit of finding this wayward band of travelers, or, more specifically Tav. Who knows what had caused it this time - tensions too high, the wrong thing pilfered from the wrong pocket, or maybe just the desire for some good old bloodshed. Swords are clashed and spells are thrown with abandon across the field of battle in a bid for coming out of this scuffle alive, commands and taunts lashed back and forth as easily as blades.

Somewhere in the midst of this chaos is their impromptu leader, doing who knows what to gods knows what. You’re grappling with your opponent, using the terrain to your advantage even as it muddies your shoes and rends holes in your armor that will need patching up later. This battle won’t last for much longer - with the entirety of your traveling party in roster you’re surprised that your opponents have even lasted this long considering the varied skill sets and questionable morals at their disposal. Still, that doesn’t mean you’re making it out unscathed. In fact, you’re mid-turn towards Shadowheart after a nasty jab to the back nearly has you tripping, the request for healing barely having left your mouth before it’s cut off with a shout…that’s not yours.

A new voice breaks through the cacophony of conflict, and there’s only a second to wonder the what’s and the why’s before someone else leaps headfirst into the fray with a shout loud enough to leave ears ringing. No one recognizes him, at least not from a glance, but he barrels into battle with all the grace of a bear as he all but slams body-first into the nearest enemy, sending them skidding through the dirt with a triumphant cry. The questions have to wait till later, burning as they are.

It’s only after the party sets about making themselves scarce from the last dregs of battle that all eyes are finally drawn back to this newcomer. Some with curiosity, intrigue; others with distrust and distaste for his sudden involvement - the question is the same on all fronts however - who is this?. Whoever he is, he seems unbothered, far more focused on pulling you to your feet. To everyone’s surprise he greets you like an old friend - a hand finding a way to your head mussing up your hair as you’re pulled into a crushing hug that has the pair of them almost tipping over back into the dirt. Laughter rings through the air as you swat at the offending hand, almost wrestling with the guy before the grip is finally relinquished and you pull yourself away.

You look…happy. Clearly you know this person, but who are they to you?

The question comes out curious, and the newcomer blinks as he turns to face your companions for the first time since his appearance.

“Who, me?” for a moment his head cocks to the side, as though the question has an obvious answer. Then he grins, an all too familiar smile stretching across his lips as he slings an arm over your shoulders, jabs a thumb in your direction and proudly declares-

“I’m their brother!”

Wyll

♡A sibling you say? The information shouldn’t be too surprising, Wyll reasons; you’re bound to have had a life somewhere in this world before the nautiloid crash, just as any of your wayward companions had. A life with family, friends and familiar faces that had been present in your day to day life before the mindflayers and tadpoles. To see a fragment of that life in person however? Wyll has to admit that he’s taken a little by surprise as he didn’t expect anyone related to you to make such a…memorable entrance. Not that you hadn’t, of course.

♡ You’ve been traveling together for long enough at this point that the two of you had begun to share tales. And yet the topic of family had never come up before, if only because Wyll wasn’t sure if you would appreciate someone prying into that subject. Gods knows his own relationship with his family was…tumultuous at best, and you haven’t actively tried to force information out of him he didn’t want to share, so he’d offered you the same courtesy.

♡ Now that he’s been introduced to your brother, Wyll's curiosity inevitably gets the better of him. He’s polite as he introduces himself to your sibling, making an approving comment about his battle prowess and good timing. In return he’s met with a bright smile that reminds him so much of you and a clap on his back as your sibling introduces himself properly in kind.

♡ Your sibling is quick to invite himself back to your camp, and while there’s grumbles from the others who seem arguably mixed about the whole arrangement, Wyll is all for the idea. It’s on the trek back to this evening’s campsite that Wyll notices how you practically brighten up around your sibling, a far cry from the reserved, quiet side of you he’s grown used to. How smiles that he’s so often seen strained or overly polite melt into something softer, livelier. Even bordering on snarky as he sees the pair of you throw about witty comments like its second nature, with playful jabs of elbows and the constant knock of shoes subtly trying to trip one another as you trail ahead.

♡ It’s a reminder of simpler times, and Wyll finds himself content at the sight of you finally letting your guard down. You’ve been on edge since the very first time he saw you at the grove, to see such a stark contrast to that moment with the way you smile and laugh now brings a hope that one day he’ll see more days of your happiness than of your grief.

♡After that meeting Wyll has no more reservations asking you more about your life and family back home - what you miss and what you’re looking forward to returning to once this is all over. Of course your brother gets involved, filling you in on everything that’s happened since you were taken by the Nautiloid and how things are back home. Home. With any luck, Wyll can help you and your brother get back there one day, minus two squirming cranial stowaways.

Shadowheart

♡ Shadowheart has a ‘oh gods there’s two of them’ moment from the second she watches you and your sibling grapple like a pair of children at the sight of one another. It doesn’t take much to fill in the gaps watching you actively cuss each other out in playful banter that would have had anyone other than close family or friends gearing up for a fight. She reasons that this person must be in the latter category, noting the similarities in your features and the similar lilt in your voices as you speak; and it’s all but confirmed once this brother of yours introduces himself.

♡ Whether you never brought them up because you felt no need or weren’t willing to share, she’s not going to exactly fault you for the decision. It’s not as though she can blame you when the majority of your relationship up until this point had been secrets, half-truths and blatant requests not to push her for more information than she’s been willing to give. 

♡ Still, it would be a lie to say that she wasn’t at least somewhat curious about your family. There comes the usual questions - who’s the oldest, what you did before this, where the two of you come from and the usual rigmarole. But Shadowheart occasionally comes in to probe at your brother's true intentions, the real questions she wants to ask. Had he come all the way out here to look for you? What had taken him so long? Surely if any other sibling had heard that their family was whisked away on a mindflayer vessel they would prepare for the worst? What are the chances that you just happened to run into your family here of all places? Thankfully by the time you all actually reach camp for the night she’s satisfied with the answers she gets enough to let your brother scarper away to catch up with you.

♡ She can’t say she didn’t expect that you were bolder than most initially thought. Sure you gave off an overly structured air tinged with an awkward demeanor, but she’s also seen that facade slip into something more coy and laid back. Shadowheart had seen it happen even more as you’d continued to bond, growing to trust the sharran and becoming more comfortable with each passing rest.

♡ But the way you interact with your brother? It’s a whole different side of you than what Shadowheart is used to seeing. She watches you brighten, grinning so hard it dimples your cheeks as you joke around with your reunited family member; and the sound of your laughter whizzes right past her tent as she watches you take off with your brother’s bed roll, tossing it to scratch and the owlbear cub with a triumphant ‘good luck getting it back!’ She notices that the mood at camp that night is significantly lighter than it’s been before that point as she comes to rest by her tent to give the camp a final once over.

♡ A memory tugs as she watches you, a distant thrum in the back of her mind as though ardent to remind her of something long since buried. It’s a nostalgic feeling - a feeling that Shadowheart can’t put a name to yet tries to chase anyway. But then comes the burn, the sharp pain of that incessant hole in her hand which flares up as though in retaliation to her pursuit. It stops her in her tracks, the familiar pain still twinging like a dwindling ember as she pushes the memory back down and rips her attention elsewhere.

Lae’zel

♡ Lae’zel can see the braincells being lost from here with every second that you spend around your sibling. Just about the only thing that stops her from turning her blade before the introductions is the fact that for whatever reason this person seemed inclined to actually aid your group, rather than joining in for the sake of adding to the carnage. Upon the revelation that this is your sibling of all things, Lae’zel’s gaze is sharp as she glances between the pair of you; an unspoken question as she focuses in on you - is he telling the truth? She’s trusting your judgment on this.

♡ It’s a foreign sight, watching you go from a bumbling, awkward reflection of yourself to someone so bold and loud. Whatever side of you this sibling of yours seems to bring out, it distracts you from everything else of importance in favor of catching up with someone who was so very sure they’d never see you again. It should frustrate her, considering just how vital this journey is even without the imminent threat of becoming illithid. But if it does you surprisingly don’t gain her ire from it; instead she allows you this moment of reprieve, moving into step within arms reach behind the pair of you the whole way back to camp.

♡ Despite the over theatrical entrance, she’s mildly impressed at your brother’s test of skill in the battle. Brutish, and with many exploitable holes should the enemy prove smart, but it was efficient enough to cut the tide of battle. She’ll tell him as such with no reservations, and you can see the cogs turning in his head as your brother tries to figure out if that was a genuine compliment or a backhanded dressdown of his tactics. His eyes dart to you for guidance but you offer no quarter, instead giving a grin watching him struggle to discern the answer for himself.

♡ You won’t have to worry about being prodded by questions from the Githyanki as you would some of the other companions at the camp. As things stand there are far more important things to focus on regarding the task ahead than exchanging pleasantries or reminiscing. With that being said, instead of retreating to her tent as everyone settles in back at camp, Lae’zel can be found sharpening her blade a little bit closer to the campfire not far from your side as your sibling regales your companions with stories and tales, both of shared memories and of things missed since you’ve been gone. 

♡ Saying this,once your sibling starts sharing embarrassing tales of your many fumbles you hear her pause to listen. It doesn’t take much to figure out that she’s paying attention specifically because of how you react, watching you practically squirm from embarrassment at the retelling as you whine that it’s nowhere near as bad as he makes them sound. Any attempts to silence your sibling get you a firm tug at your shoulder as she keeps you rooted to her side the rest of that night, giving your sibling the go ahead to continue - the tale was just beginning to become interesting.

Karlach

♡ Karlach sorely wishes that she could frame the face that you make as soon as you recognize that it’s your brother who’s come to your party’s ‘rescue’. Your whole expression lights up with an emotion she doesn’t think she’s seen in the past decade. Hope, relief - joy. You and your sibling just about crash into each other trying to hug, laughing replacing the sounds of fighting just moments ago.

♡ No sooner have you broken the hug Karlach comes forward to check out the newcomer for herself. Anyone you trust has got her full support too, so her welcome is all smiles as the tiefling joins the two of you as she introduces herself. If anyone’s going to make your brother feel welcomed into the party, Karlach is safe to say one of the very top of that list; she’s the life of the party and is willing to lend you her trust and companionship if you don’t do her wrong as you’ve learned firsthand.

♡ The moment you begin showing that side of yourself only your family is privy to, Karlach is here for it, and will actively encourage it. You’re louder, less awkward and more comfortable, and you can bet Karlach has never been more excited for that change. What she notices the most is how much lighter you seem to feel, no longer burdened by the gargantuan weight of ‘what ifs’ of what’s to come that have been plaguing you from the beginning - don’t think for a second she hasn’t noticed. 

♡ She doesn’t think she’s seen a shred of that stress or uncertainty since you’d reunited with your brother. Sure, it’s no doubt still stewing in the back of your mind along with the tadpole but seeing you let loose like she hasn’t seen before is a refreshing change of pace - like things could be really looking up from here.

♡ She wants to know how she can make you smile and act like that, and when there’s a lull in the conversation Karlach ducks in to ask your sibling exactly that. He gives her such a warm look as soon as she asks the question, as though her asking at all actually relieved him. The only answer she gets is a noncommittal shrug and reassurance that with time you’ll open up, joking that she may regret it once she sees the full brunt of how chaotic you can get. She doubts she’ll ever regret it, even as you goad him for hogging your companion’s attention and call for them to catch up.

♡Similar to Wyll, once Karlach’s seen your family for herself she’s absolutely brimming with questions about the both of you. This sparks the conversation of wanting to know more about your family, where you came from, what it’s like; it’s enough to make your head spin if you weren’t already fondly accustomed to the lively tiefling’s usual party banter. The three of you end up crowded around the fire back at camp that very evening, sharing stories over snacks you may or may not have ‘borrowed’ from the supply packs when Gale wasn’t looking.

♡ It’s a little bittersweet recalling old memories of better times when things weren’t such a tragic mess, but gods if it isn’t the best feeling on a night like this. The entire time she’s trying to commit every single moment of this night to memory, from the way the corners of your eyes crinkle when you crack up, or the way you scowl and none-too-subtly try and boot your brother when he tries to tell embarrassing stories he promised he wouldn’t. You’ve got a good family, one that’s worth fighting for. She just hopes that she’ll be here long enough to see you reunite with them proper when all of this is over.

Gale

♡ Gale sees the exact moment that you recognize who this impromptu guest is. Your face melts from confusion to surprise, before an overflow of emotions passes through your eyes and you meet your brother halfway just about knocking the two of you into the dirt in your joy. The wizard is more than happy to give you time to enjoy this reunion, and may or may not subtly step aside to avoid the splashback of mud kicked up watching the pair of you practically running circles around one another in the name of giving you space.

♡ Once things calm down enough for you to actually fill the party in on the identity of the newcomer, Gale’s surprised he didn’t notice before. There’s clear differences obviously, but seeing the two of you standing side by side as thick as thieves with those devilish grins to boot the resemblance is rather striking. He chalks it up to a detail easily missed in the throes of battle - picking out similarities between faces is an excellent way to get a blade between the ribs, and Gale’s got no such intentions of being on the receiving end of that literal jab.

♡ It’s rather entertaining watching you and your sibling interact, though you’re certainly a lot more playful and reckless than the wizard has ever seen you act before. Gale’s had no such siblings to relate the experience to, but even from just this small experience of watching how you act around him is enough of an indicator that you’re more than happy at the uncanny turn of events. 

♡ Just don’t expect the trek back to camp to be a quiet one, not that it ever is whenever you go out anywhere with Gale in the party. Gale is ever the man of questions. Too many of them actually as the three of you are still prattling by the time that your makeshift camp comes into view. Who could possibly blame him, when their usually awkward and reserved team leader has a never before disclosed sibling suddenly run right into them in what is essentially the middle of nowhere.

♡ Curiosity, as it often does, gets the better of the wizard who will quite happily waste the rest of the evening away grilling the pair of you for answers to the burning questions that he has regarding your background. If you’re willing to share, of course. Gale’s no stranger to verbally putting his foot in it if given half of the chance, but he’ll respect any refusals to queries you deem too personal for right now. If you are willing to share however get ready for what is essentially a combined sleepover outside Gale’s tent because he will keep all three of you up recounting tales until you quite literally fall asleep in your seats. When he complains in the morning for the back pains at having slept in such an awkward position, be sure to remind him that it’s what he signed up for.

♡ Gale for one is happy that you’ve been able to reunite with a family member in light of such dire circumstances. It’s not ideal when you have such heavy responsibilities on your shoulders, but hopefully having your sibling around will provide you some much needed comfort and support in a time where you arguably need it the most. And that support is more important now than ever, especially with the looming threat of everything that’s to come the second you step out of this temporary respite.

Astarion

♡ This is your sibling? Really? Is Astarion’s immediate thought, and the first words out of his mouth as he gives the sibling in question a cautionary once over with a raised brow. He’s not surprised, not really. Instead, he’s more puzzled. Of course far stranger things had happened over the course of this little escapade - infant eating hags, cult worshiping goblins and of course damned mindflayers, just to name a (admittedly impressive) few instances. 

♡But what are the actual chances that of all the people to come running to your aid in the wilderness, where the only thing for a mile in each direction is woods, beasts and death, just so happens to be your sibling of all people? For a second he wonders if you’d gotten in touch with your sibling yourself - maybe called them over for help in a spot of trouble. But then he catches the way you face brightens with surprise, damn near sinking the poor sod into the dirt with how hard you grapple back to return your brother’s hug. Either you’re a damned good actor, or you’re just as surprised as the rest of them.

♡ Similar to Shadowheart, Astarion is more than a little weary of the sudden appearance. But he will outright sidle up to you on the trek back when your sibling isn’t paying attention to warn you to keep an eye on that brother of yours. There’s all manner of creatures who can wear the faces of men as easily as the clothes on your back, you’re the best person to decide whether this guy is the real deal. All said with a smile of course, though his friendly advice is only met with an eyeroll of all things as you playfully rib him for being so worried.

♡ It’s bizarre really, watching you laugh and joke with your brother. That carefree attitude and playfulness shared with inside jokes and snarky back and forth is a new look for you, though Astarion’s certainly not going to quash it. It’s an entertaining change - makes things more fun even if he could do without the mildly sickening display of a healthy family dynamic. It’s not as though Astarion can exactly relate to it, even with his own ‘siblings’, they’d all spent the better part of two centuries relentlessly undermining one another in a bid for their master’s nonexistent mercy and a taste of freedom that wouldn’t come.

♡ You hadn’t brought anything up about your background at this point - sure, Astarion knew the basics and had been working to get you to open up enough to spill more of the juicy details. But the elf had been firm in toeing the boundary of coaxing information out of you while keeping his closely guarded; an admittedly difficult feat considering with your damned politeness you’d go out of your way to direct any questions received right back at him as a matter of courtesy. You hadn’t made prying easy for him, which is most likely why it has taken so long to get a glimpse at your background - he just didn’t expect it to be in the flesh. 

♡ So when he sees the chance to pry for more information, you can bet he’ll take full advantage of the opportunity. He’s halfway through a glass listening to your brother recounting stories when he lets slip that it’s such a shame you never mentioned the sibling before - to think he’s been missing out on these stories all this time. You know what he’s up to, but your sibling falls for it hook line and sinker, dramatically falling into your side and letting gravity do the rest of the work to make you suffer.

♡ The obvious theatrics of your brother bemoaning your negligence of his memory makes the elf snort into his glass, and your groan and attempts to shove the deadweight off is only doubled when Astarion further stirs the pot about how you’d not even breathed a word about your beloved family. Why, Astarion was beginning to fear the worst for you, how relieved he is to know you’ve got such a lovely family looking out for you.

Rolan

♡ The revelation comes as a surprise to the majority of the party, watching your brother proudly clapping a hand onto your shoulder as he reveals his identity to your new traveling companions. Admittedly, this is not where Rolan ever expected to be when he’d crossed paths with your merry band of misfits for the umpteenth time, and feels rather out of place. He thinks he might be the only one that this is news too, until a quick glance at the varying degrees of confusion and mild distrust reassure him that he’s definitely not the odd one out in this scenario.

♡ For a second Rolan is truly baffled. In all the times that you’ve interacted with one another, Rolan’s always seen you as painfully awkward, going out of your way to be nothing short of polite and well-mannered with varying degrees of success. He’d long grown used to it, coming to expect it by default with each and every encounter. So how is it that someone who appeared out of nowhere and seems to be such a polar opposite to everything he knows about you, be your sibling of all things?

♡ But then he recalls just how different he, Lia and Cal are and it suddenly makes a lot more sense.

♡The next thing he wonders is how you having any family at all never came up before? You’ve shared conversations before, with him less willing to indulge you on a couple of said occasions than others. Surely the topic has come up at least one time before, right?...right? 

♡ He’s never actually asked you, Rolan realizes with a startling clarity. In fact, in all the time you’ve spent traveling and running into one another, the thought of prying into your own backstory and getting overly involved in your history hadn’t really crossed his mind; at least, not enough that he’d blatantly ask without sufficient cause. He was just being polite, is what he tries to convince himself - it would be rude to go getting involved in others affairs like you’ve been doing since you’ve met him.

♡ And yet the realization nags more than it should, feeling a little guilty that of all the times you’ve gone out of your way to learn more about the wizard, he hasn’t thought to do the same for you. He especially feels it upon seeing just how differently you act around your brother; you’re louder, bolder, and aren’t afraid to look like a complete fool - had he ever seen you look that carefree before today? He hopes it’s not the last he sees of it.

♡ He’s neglected to learn more about you before, so he sets to learning now, with about as much tact as an owlbear in an antique shop. He feels too awkward outright asking you about it, so he settles for the next best thing and promptly falls in step with your brother. There’s nothing like sharing stories on the road after all - and given how earnestly the tiefling’s asking, your sibling caves and offers to give him the brief family rundown - if only for the funny stories that he’s been dying to share with anyone who even remotely knows you.

♡ The two of them bond, much to your surprise. About an hour or two into getting settled down at camp you go looking for them; only to find them sharing an already half empty bottle of spirits and shooting stories back and forth about all the wild and reckless shit their respective siblings have gotten into over the years. Rolan flashes you a grin and offers you to join them on the story telling - your brother has shared some dreadfully embarrassing tales and he’s dying to know if there’s any truth to them.

[lost-estradiographer]

I

know that voting for the status quo sucks.

To say it "sucks" massively understates the exact amount of suffering that exists under the status quo, an amount that I acknowledge I am too privileged to ever fully grasp.

I cannot magically provide some viable third-party candidate just barely a month before the election. I cannot solve Israel/Palestine Conflict that has haunted the world for over 70 years. I am a 29-year old transgender woman working her way through her own mental illnesses, trauma, and an undergraduate degree. I was never going to be the one to solve anything here.

All I can tell you is that regardless of whether you vote or not, there will be a presidential election. It's going to be a shitshow, regardless. Whether you vote or not, there will be a different president in January. Voting for the status quo may not be directly in your interests.

We had four years of Trump and we are still trying to unfuck ourselves from that. The beginning of my antagonistic relationship with the government was protesting in the streets of DC under his administration. I've fled from the Metro PD. I've put on a change of clothes and slipped out the back door of a gay sports bar.

Fucking vote.

Fucking vote.

Fucking vote.

Honestly, I

I don't want to see this voter apathy shit anymore.

People are going to keep dying under any president. Any president can, and probably wil, be morally culpable for the deaths of innocent people, both in the country and abroad. Carter might be the last president we had that wasn't overtly a war criminal and we still had foreign civilians killed by U.S. military involvement under the Carter admin.

I'm torn between asking you to block me, or asking you to message me, if you're taking the route of voter apathy. I'll tell you right away, here and now, that I probably don't have a solution to whatever problem is keeping you from voting for Harris. I can't even solve my own problems right, tbh. The government isn't really here for me, either.

But there isn't going to be some sort of miraculous revolution that results in The Ending Where Everyone Lives. If there's a revolution, then supply chains will falter and children and the infirm will die of preventable diseases and infections and complications in hospitals that would have otherwise been able to easily deal with such things. That's what happens in a revolution. I'm after the long-term idea where Humanity as a species lives. I'm after the route where we don't have an ending, we keep going.

Fucking vote, because exactly one of the two leading presidential candidates believes climate change is real, and it is the single greatest threat to all life on earth. We have spent the past 250 years, not just playing God with the environment, but actively creating an ecological niche in which future generations of humanity must continue to play God with the environment, dragging it back to a healthy place drop by drop, inch by inch, a degree at a time.

Or, I mean, don't vote. Either way, we'll all die at some point. Perhaps some of us will be lucky enough to die standing by our principles.

Those lucky few will become soil one day, just like I will.

I am begging you on my hands and knees to fucking vote, though, because our options are The Status Quo vs. Worse. That's

That's it.

There is no door number three right now. Our system, our flawed and broken and imbalanced and unjust system, does not accommodate for a third door. Whether you vote or not, you will be dragged through either Door 1 or Door 2 with all of humanity, as we whirl through the cosmos upon our tiny little speck of dust. The only other legitimate option is to allow oneself to become trampled; to become soil early. I don't say legitimate to give this option legitimacy, but to make clear that again, there is no door three. Door three is a casket. A one-way bed.

I didn't vote in 2016, and I'm hoping that you'll vote for the status quo this time, because that's the route that gives me the best odds of having a long and healthy life to regret my failure through inaction.

Just please

Fucking vote.

Or again, if you're taking the apathy route, probably just save me the time of blocking you, because you're not going to magically pull a viable third-party candidate out of your pocket less than six weeks before the election.

[woundedheartwithin]

Back on my meds, making a damn decent paycheck despite how many days I had to take off this month, my mom’s feeling better now that she’s home and we’ve figured everything out, our neighbor’s gonna build us a wheelchair ramp for cheap, and my dad miiiiiiiiight be buying a new car as we speak 🤞 (my mom just can’t get into the truck anymore, and she hasn’t wanted to drive her two seater for a while now, so we’re trading it for something practical). Things are finally going fairly well, all things considered ❤️

[shannonsketches]

Ganondorf and Nabooru in a heated marital dispute Ganon: You wanna duke it out in the desert? Nabooru: Fuck yeah, I do! *starts biting off her acrylics one by one* Ganon: *scared*

Oh she wouldn't even need to take them off, I trust her palm and knife hand strikes 😂

Look at those upper body forms, her fronthand-backhand will put you straight into next week.

[savage-rhi]

Having a B3 overdose be like

[binch-i-might-be]

honestly at this point in my life I might just get a roomba

[ducktr0ducin]

My psionic warriors- please wish this Ned luck. Ned is. Scared about my first day at a job tomorrow.

[wolfchans]

I'm so sleepy

[extreme-technicality]

Reblog to send prev gently drifting off into dreamland

[pipwasreal]

Day 9: past + nipple play

Characters: Edwin Payne, Charles Rowland, the demon Sa'al (mentioned)

Content warnings: trauma, torture, collaring, groping, non-consensual body modification, dehumanisation, nipple torture, masochism

So this is kind of a continuation from yesterday's. Just the way the stars/prompts aligned! It's also very serious and then very silly. I am sleep-deprived.

Edwin is sitting on the settee, back straight against the wall, knees drawn up to his chest and hands resting on his knees, staring blankly into space.

He's regained control of his appearance, spectral body whole and fully clothed again, not a hair out of place. But he hasn't removed Charles' coat from around his shoulders, and he hasn't spoken at all since they mirror-hopped back to the office.

"Mind if I sit down?"

Edwin shakes his head slightly, so Charles settles sideways on the settee, facing Edwin, one foot flat on the ground, the other hooked under that knee.

"Can I hold your hand?"

Edwin's lips twitch in a tiny smile, his gaze lowering to look at his own knees. He moves one hand to lie on the cushion between them, palm up, letting Charles slide his hand on top of it and squeeze.

"D'you wanna talk about it?"

For a moment, Edwin looks very young, eyes wide and terrified. His hand seizes in Charles'. Then he visibly pulls himself together and raises his head.

"The day we met..." he says quietly, not looking at Charles, "the day you died... I'm afraid I did not know half as much as I pretended to about being a ghost."

Charles smiles encouragingly. He suspected as much, but they figured it out together soon enough.

Edwin takes a deep, unnecessary breath.

"But I know more than any person should about Hell. I had hoped to spare you, but I suspect I may need to... explain."

He pauses, glancing sidelong at Charles.

"No doubt, based on what you saw, you have drawn some conclusions about... my experiences."

Charles gives a non-committal shrug. Edwin's mouth twists, but he presses on, tone light and brittle.

"It may interest you to learn that the piercing itself was done with a tool very like a toasting fork. And the marks around my neck? Came from a collar of twisted metal thorns. Sa'al was rather prou-"

He cuts himself off with a frustrated noise.

"I am explaining this... inadequately," he mutters.

He is quiet a moment, face turned away. Charles can only wait, without even breath to distract him.

"I am released from the burden of having a body," Edwin says finally. "The burden of memory remains."

"The pain, obviously," he says, voice flat. "There was the rasping wrongness of metal against raw flesh. The ache and throb when it was... fondled. But also the humiliation of my helplessness. Forced forward by the slightest tug on the chain attached to it."

His grip on Charles' hand is very tight, and his next words come out through gritted teeth.

"I remember how it felt, so there it is, sometimes, against my will, manifested again. And the sight of it sickens me, though that ought to be impossible, because... because I was owned, Charles. I was a thing to be kept and used and traded and..."

He pauses, swallows hard.

"Embellished," he spits. "By several masters."

There is silence for a minute.

"That's fucked up, mate," says Charles.

Edwin's startled laugh sounds a lot like a sob.

"Yes," he says. "Yes, it was."

"Well done, again, on getting out," Charles says. "Bears repeating, doesn't it?"

"Thank you, Charles," Edwin says, something terribly fond in his voice. He closes his eyes and leans his head back against the wall. "Your turn. Please. Tell me something about your past. Anything."

"Okay, well, obviously it doesn't remotely compare, but... speaking of nipples, mine have always been right sensitive. The cricket team used to play this stupid game in the locker room, where they'd spray deodorant on someone's nipple from an inch away, until it felt super cold, like it was actually frozen... and then they'd flick it. And the poor lad had to prove he was hard by not showing how much it hurt, and not making a fuss if it bled. Fun game, right?"

Edwin snorts.

"Well, when it was my turn, I nearly bloody came, didn't I? Had to bend over, pretend I was gonna puke from the fumes, til I could get myself under control."

"You are an absolute deviant," Edwin says, but he's smiling, and that's all that matters.

[thenamessparkplug]

only thing keeping me alive right now<3333

[kaiowut99]

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters GX Episodes 95 and 96 Subbed (Finalized)

(Previously: Episodes 93 and 94 Subbed [Finalized])

(Check out my Subbed!GX Stream Masterpost!)

TURN-95: A Ruthless Brotherly Duel -- Ryou VS Shou

Wishing for his kind and respectable brother to be himself again, Shou challenges the Hell Kaiser to a duel. But a callous Ryou conditions it on having a duel in which an electric current will rush through them with every drop in their Life Points. And so, a brotherly duel begins between Ryou and Shou. Shou does develop his dueling--respecting his opponent as always--but Ryou pounces on him, in full command of the Cyber Style's Reverse deck.

TURN-96: The Relativity Field! Judai VS the Genius Doctor

In order to take back one of his important keys, a Saiou struck by the Waves of Light once again sends in an assassin against Judai. The assassin is Zweinstein, a genius physics expert with a deck made logically--Judai's weakest point of all. Zweinstein activates his Relativity Field to start things off. He then summons* a Monster that negates Judai's Fusion, his forte, gaining an edge as the duel unfolds. *This is referencing Singularity Demon's effect in the episode, but he doesn't actually summon it; it's more of a hand-trap he discards to negate Fusion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Got my subs for episodes 95 and 96 all nice and finalized!

These two episodes are a great time, but 95 in particular is great. It's the culmination of those little bits we've had of Shou observing Ryou's fall from grace since his loss to Ed, knowing he'd face him one day and preparing himself for it, and the whole time they're dueling, he holds onto some hope that he can turn Ryou back into the big brother he knew--only to realize by the end that Ryou, after what he's seen underground, really is just focused on winning, willing to be as "cruel" or "foul" as it takes if it helps. You do feel for the little guy, moreso when this gets flashed back to in 137 during Season 3 (another favorite, as it's a big development episode for Shou). Also, Judai being a friend and watching over him knowing this was his choice to make, building him up about using Power Bond, rushing over once the duel's over--it's sweet.

96 is also one of my favorites because of the good art/dynamic animation, courtesy of Kyoung Soo Lee's animation team (especially those last few scenes after Judai destroys Relativity Field, but just the Solid Vision putting them in space the entire time). The premise isn't too bad, we check in with Misawa who's realizing that just joining the Society of Light isn't enough for him to make a name for himself, and he bumps into God Einstein Zweinstein who tells him that logic beats "coincidence," before he tries to convey this to Judai and prove his Grand Unified Duel Theory. I like the Dueling Physics idea and the Einstein parody (he won a Nobelly Prize!), and the match between his logic and Judai's intuition--and who doesn't enjoy the randomness of Misawa's extra Eureka moment, lmao. Still a bit meh on it being the last we see of him for a while, but it is nice seeing him when he does come back. (Also, I like how it's not at all mentioned how Ojin managed to get a recording of Chronos calling for Judai to trick him with... very GX lol)

Edit-wise, both episodes had a fair amount of animation error fixes I applied; 95 saw more card-related errors than the quick one in 96, while both had a fair share of more quality-of-watching ones with split-screens, incomplete footage frames, or miscolorings (and in Burstlady's case, another missing shoulder strap). Due to Tumblr’s dumb link limit in posts yeeting them out of the tags used for them and limiting their reach, and since I still wanted a visual element to it, I’ve made a separate post here with my usual fix/edit breakdown for the interested--altogether, that's about 26 between both episodes, which I think I hit sometime in S1 when doing double-releases for a bit, but since most were quality-of-watching things, they were pretty quick to work on for the most part.

Anywho, enjoy! Looking forward to revisiting 97 and 98 next as we circle back to the Pro Leagues and get Ed's best episode of the Season in the process; as Judai put it in 96's preview for 97, "Ed's Wheel of Fortune'll suddenly start to turn..."

[alongtidesoflight]

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[silverchronicler]

Prime Report for TennoCon (July) 2024 - SPECIAL EDITION

hey what the fuck

Prime Access

SO some stuff happened at TennoCon. Let's talk about what it might mean for the future.

Currently in Prime Access is Protea Prime, along with Velox Prime and Okina Prime. As was revealed at TennoCon, she's slated to be replaced by Sevagoth Prime, alongside Epitaph Prime and Nautilus Prime in August, when they release with The Lotus Eaters, a planned August 2024 update coming to Warframe.

Protea Prime was released on May 1, 2024, making her guaranteed 90 day reign end just about August 1. They've almost all been slated to go a little longer than that though, so it's likely that the update will come out mid August. I'd bet it comes either August 14th or August 21st, but that's just throwing darts at a dart board. Maybe if they have all their ducks in a row we'll get it on the 7th. Most of these dates are less than a month away, so it's best to keep this in mind if you wanted to get her.

This is great. He looks great. But it does raise one question:

Where's Xaku Prime?

Speculation under the cut.

Sevagoth Prime being announced as the next one was a surprise. Mainly because, any way you slice it, he's way out of the order of expectation. Usually they follow a pattern that organizes the Prime warframes by gender, but then goes loosely in release order. Male-Male-Female-Female-Male-Male-etc, with frames being slotted into those slots according to the pattern they were released in loosely, with maybe two being switched around here or there.

Now, Xaku was always going to be an interesting case and exception (sort of) to this, because Xaku is pluriform as they are made up of the remnants of multiple warframes implied to be of multiple genders. But to me this means that they could fit into whatever slot they happen to match to, since they are, in a way, of both/all genders. Xaku was the first frame to come out after Protea, so it'd make sense that they'd be slotted right after her, which is what I've been expecting this whole time since I wrote about it in January.

Instead, Sevagoth is jumping two slots to take the slot after Protea, also jumping over Lavos, who is the next male warframe in line. I'd expect there'd need to be a pretty decent reason for this big of an upset in their pattern. They didn't give much of one, and in fact Xaku wasn't mentioned at all during TennoCon as far as I could tell. I had sort of hoped they'd at least say they were coming back to Xaku but DE made no mention of any other future primes or the frames around Sevagoth in any notable way.

Now, that's not a bad thing necessarily. These patterns have never been officially announced as far as I can tell, but they've been pretty closely followed for the general fairness of the prime process. Following close to a pattern means they aren't playing favorites choosing warframes to prime, and that no frame gets forgotten for getting a Prime. But there could be plenty of reasons for them deciding to or wanting to change it up. Maybe they wound up having a few in process at once and Sevagoth wound up being the one that was far enough in the process to do next, with Xaku and Lavos still needing their concepts refined, something like that.

I know there's been some anxiety in the past around Xaku getting a prime as their whole concept doesn't lend itself easily to the concept of a prime warframe in the same way that almost every other warframe does, but I definitely think if Xaku weren't going to get a prime at all, they would have already told us. They know people are looking forward to Xaku Prime, and with more and more weird and unique warframe concepts being introduced these days, there's no good reason why having a unique concept should keep Xaku from getting a prime. More likely something came up in the development process that caused some hiccups, and I could think of plenty of reasons for this, especially around TennoCon being the reveal of the next prime. We have no reason to think anything other than that Xaku is being pushed back a slot or two, and Lavos as well.

But either way, we have no current info from DE as far as I know, but if that changes then I'll update this somehow.

As for if they'll do something to rectify the gendered slot pattern, it's impossible to say.

Predictions for Future Prime Order: (Bold is already exists)

Grendel Gauss Protea (We are here) Sevagoth (Announced) Xaku Lavos Yareli Gyre Caliban Styanax

Or, if they have decided to eschew double gender order from now on:

Protea Sevagoth Xaku Lavos Yareli Caliban Gyre Styanax

I could also see them switching Xaku and Lavos on either of these lists if for some reason Xaku continues to be a problem. I personally wouldn't get worried about anything unless we get both Lavos and Yareli prime without hearing any news about Xaku prime. At that point I'd be asking some serious questions, but for now this is unexpected but fine. Sevagoth Prime is gonna be cool as hell, and we already know that.

Prime Resurgence

Currently available from Varzia are Nekros Prime with Tigris Prime and Galantine Prime and Harrow Prime with Scourge Prime and Knell Prime, along with relics for their component parts and such. They are slated to stay there until August 1st, at which point they'll be replaced by Mesa Prime and Limbo Prime.

Also available from Varzia until October 24th are Ember Prime with Sicarus Prime and Glaive Prime, and Rhino Prime with Boltor Prime and Ankyros Prime. They and their relics are available to celebrate the Ember Heirloom Collection that launched the morning of TennoCon with DE's new system for Heirloom Collections. If you don't know about the new system, I suggest you look at the Heirloom Collection page on the warframe website to familiarize yourself with it. At TennoCon, they announced that Rhino Prime would be the next Heirloom Collection after Ember, thus why they get to share the space in Varzia's for now. Get them while the getting's good!

Ok I think that's everything! Gonna try to do shorter versions of these more often but when there's more to talk about I feel more motivated to write them so we'll see! Happy Prime Hunting!

[mooshkat]

last day of pride month, some gay shit better happen to me today