#God I really hope I'm making sense
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You are really doing your username justice, well for the saint’s part I mean. Was going to ask you for your overall opinion on Mr Collins and you already posted something yesterday? What a coincidence, peace and love on planet earth! 🥹
Peace and love indeed! You're entirely too kind, friend!
I have a lot of feelings about Collins, needless to say. Especially about how his story fits in with that wider theme of the Individual vs the Collective.
He's such a kind and caring person who clearly sees others as individuals - he knows exactly who that is in the water, even after the poor bugger's plummeted past him at terminal velocity. And I think about that a lot in sharp contrast to someone like Franklin who in the very same episode (at least in the scripts) has to be reminded who David Young even is and even then still acts directly against Young's best interests in shipping him over to Erebus.
Both men are part of the Collective as senior officers, as members of command.
One sees his men as individuals and is willing to put his own life on the line to do right by them
One barely seems to see his men at all, let alone as individuals, and isn't willing even to put his own evening plans on the line in order to do right by one of them.
So yeah, I suppose it just makes it all the more heart-breaking that Collins tries so hard to look out for the Individual when he's part of the Collective, only to not receive the same care and respect when he himself is the Individual.
#Asks#Henry Foster Collins#The Terror#The Terror AMC#Honestly just repeating myself at this point but I don't care#I love him too much#I love all of them too much#To the point of incoherence no doubt#God I really hope I'm making sense
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Nice catch! :]
Here's a very self indulgent and low effort drawing I made in an attempt to keep my sanity lol
#lu legend#linked universe#lu fanart#why is his hair dry? why is he not transforming back? Idk I just got the image in my mind and my hand started moving on its own#do I know the tail is blue? yeah. will I still imagine it's pink? absolutely. it looks too god on him#hope the proportions aren't too weird I didn't really go back to fix things bc I just wanted this out of my system lol#I looked at like three pictures of harpoons I'm sorry if it makes no sense#The whole time I was wondering what my ancestors would think of me if they were watching me from the afterlife 😩#anyways. him. that's the post#I feel like I always end up drawing him with too much hair lol#cw blood#cw injury#told myself I was just going to add a few final details like three hours ago 😭#ayuda quiten esto de los cuadritos que salen en mi perfil 😭😭 q pena
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thinking about how eiji's a pole vaulter and how ash talks about eiji "flying" and how eiji's associated with bird imagery and how eiji's free (unlike ash) and how eiji comes in on a plane and leaves on a plane and how ash cannot fly, ash cannot be free, how nyc is ash's prison, and how ash is the leopard who dies climbing the mountain, unable to live at such elevation, how he was trying to reach the sky and be free but was always stuck to the earth, how he chose to die instead of climbing back down, how he chose to die where he could see the sky and hope and freedom almost like a bird with eiji's letter right in front of him rather than letting everything go wrong and ruin it once again, how eiji's a failed pole vaulter anyway, how a bad fall ruined his career and grounded him (physically and emotionally), how it took flying to america and meeting ash and needing to save him and skip for him to try flying again, how he landed hard and harsh and still the thought of that escape compelled ash to protect eiji at all costs because if he could fly that means something to him, even if he doesn't think he can fly, how eiji is the manifestation of his hope and how when he breaks and asks eiji to stay with him a while he folds himself over his legs and weighs him down and traps him and grounds him, how ash fights like hell to keep eiji alive not because he thinks he can be like him (hopeful, flying, innocent), but because he makes him forget the gravity of his situation, and so he can see eiji fly again. how he wants to see him escape. how eiji is a bird and ash is a wildcat and how ash never once saw eiji as prey. how eiji never saw ash as a predator. how it is eiji's naivete that first endears ash to him, how it is his freedom and flight and removal from darkness and his ability to leave that darkness that really roots eiji in ash's blood as something essential to him keeping on living in this hell of nyc. how it is that distance from the violence and that hope for the future that ash chooses to surround himself in as he dies. how ash dies in a dream because he feels more than anything that he can't fly like eiji, that he can never leave. how his violence is a part of him and will be forever, how it weighs him down. how he wants to enjoy the view from the mountainside rather than looking up from the ground below. as if they can both fly. as if he is with him up there and not grounded. eye-to-eye with what he can't have, seeing eiji's homeland: the sky. how he dies trying to reach the top because he couldn't take retreating and trying again. how ash, tired and tired and tired and convinced it will go on forever if he crawls back down the mountain, chooses to close his life deluged in eiji, in eiji's insistence that they can fly together, in eiji's hope for him and for them, in eiji's beautiful dream. how ash dies without trying to realize that dream. how ash, in dying, destroys it.
#banana fish spoilers#I'M HAVING A FUCKING MOMENT#mutual reblogged exactly one (1) piece of ash fanart and sent me on A Multiple Hour Long Thing and now im rewatching it lol#yes i am only on episode 2 yes i am still going to write big long analysis posts ANYWAY#whatever hope this makes sense. anyway#banana fish#okumura eiji#ash lynx#asheiji#hhhhh i can't believe i've only watched this twice in like what 5.5 years?? sheesh#anywayyyyyyy i care about them a lot ok. god#and yes i DO kinda have beef with the decision to kill ash off at the end but it really does say so much About his character#that he chose to die in the way that he did even though he's been throwing his life away since episode 1#dying in peace in comfort in solitude rather than in some chaotic battlefield.... ough...... in the peace eiji alone could give him.....#anywayss i relate to ash a little more than i should so. this one's for us cool guy bottoms up#edit i uh.... i forgot it was a leopard.... in the story..... but whatever it doesn't really affect the symbolic meaning it's just embarras#ing that i forgot >;/
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slowly realizing more and more that the sm boycott effort is gonna amount to nothing in the end, and this is not the way we should be going about the riize situation.
i loved seunghan when he was in the group, and i am still an ot7 fan. but at a point, i think we need to think of how much of our time and energy we're willing to spend fighting for something that has such a small chance of actually happening. sm is gonna bounce back from any stock lost from the boycott because they are one of the big 3. they have like 4 of the biggest groups in kpop rn: nct, aespa, red velvet, riize. there's just no way either boycotting riize or boycotting all of sm would actually be detrimental enough to get a member who's been terminated from the group back in.
and while i don't agree with the ot6 fans who are being unreasonable, i think some ot7 fans have been just as bad. this fandom is so toxic and rotten, every day it just seems to get worse. and i don't like the narrative that most ot7 fans were spreading about ot6 kfans-- how they were just mad that seunghan was dating pre debut. that isn't why they were mad, they really didn't care about that. it's the fact that he took pictures of him with his possibly/alleged underage girlfriend (it's honestly bad enough with/without her being possible underage, which i don't have confirmation on) at what looks like a hotel and presumably sent it to his friends in a group chat (which was how it got leaked). that's why they wanted him out of the group.
personally, i don't believe that a member should get kicked out of a group or put on hiatus without a proper reason why. and seunghan's hiatus and termination is really messy. but there are valid reasons why kfans weren't too big on him. the problem is there have been many idols kicked out for things they didn't do, and others who have been caught doing really fucked up and nasty things and rightfully kicked out of the group, but it's hard to know which idols are innocent or not when there's no organization. and when we jump on a narrative train and blow something super big out of proportion, the facts and proper investigation of the situation gets lost in the mess of things.
what should have happened was things being properly investigated back in october 2023 before seunghan was ever put on hiatus, and a decision made from there whether to keep him in the group or kick him out based on that.
instead, we have the other 6 members who clearly want seunghan back tired of the state of everything (rightfully so), ot7 and ot6 fans fighting a full blown war every day without logical thinking, and misinformation being spread left and right. there's no organization, there's no firm confirmation on anything, all of this is just such a big mess.
now let me be clear IF it's true that there was anything suspicious going on between seunghan and his girlfriend, then i would obviously no longer support him. as it is, i'm not going to stop supporting him until there's firm evidence. i'm tired of kpop stans making rash decisions based on half truths instead of just being patient and waiting for the facts to come out. staying neutral during unclear situations is a valid stance to take. please let's all stop jumping to conclusions from both sides.
#zanna thinks ❀˖°#honestly everything in this situation is so messy it's hard to get any timeline or facts straight#but god idek what the boycott is gonna do at this point#like originally i was all for the boycott too#boycotts have been proven to work in the past#but only because they were organized#like the loona boycott#this boycott isn't organized and there isn't a super good reason for it either...#it's not effective enough to make a difference#sm is just too big#boycotting other sm groups really isn't gonna help either#i think we can all agree that kpop companies are horrible and we hate all of them#we don't want to support the awful companies#but there's also really no way to still support a group without also supporting the company#so in the end it's just messy#anyway i HOPE this all makes sense and i don't sound like a crazy ot6 or something 💀💀#i'm still ot7#but i also don't think idols are incapable of doing anything wrong#and there is a chance that seunghan did do something deserving of being kicked out#there's a chance any idol has done something deserving of that#but until there's evidence i'm not inclined to stop supporting prematurely#us as fans never know what's happening behind the scenes until actual reputable statements come out
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yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.
to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!
i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.
also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.
they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.
they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.
i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.
#eve text#elmike#stranger things#byler#only tagging byler because i feel like yall will like this take lol#tagging tagging tagging WHAT ARE EVERYONE ELSE'S THOUGHTS#god i can't believe i'm making a post about stranger things. this feels like poking a bear#i'm not particularly anti m*leven but like... they'd have to do something pretty special at this point for me to feel like it's viable#i'm seeing the bts of s5 and it's got me Having Thoughts#elmike friendship is something i am so passionate about#even before i ever liked byler (didn't ship at all until s4 even though i knew it was a thing before) i've felt this way about elmike#i always believed they were close friends at heart and needed to break up#the romance part of them felt very distinctly young and very much “he was a boy she was a girl” to me#and it hasn't deepened into anything more mature and i don't see how it could based on the current state of the writing...#the fact that lumax exists — a young relationship that is actively maturing and is healthy — makes that clear to me#and the “love confession” in s4 and how disingenuous and miserable it felt was just the nail in the coffin#also the fact that will (who is IN LOVE with mike) was instrumental in making it happen? ... uh... okay... interesting choice…#fucked up and reductive if they make it another queer unrequited love sacrifice for the sake of pushing the heterosexual agenda YUCK#so i really hope the speculation about a m*leven breakup is real!! i think it just makes sense for their characters but who knows#i don't believe in the notion of love at first sight or one true love and i think the writers don't too???#love to me is an accumulation of experiences and we inevitably choose it at some point rather than fall into it... but idk#tv is so fixated on keeping couples together... sometimes it's just not reality guys especially with young people... LET IT GO...#like i said though i'm not 100% sold that they're going to give up their “golden couple” LMAO#stranger things hasn't historically subverted too many tropes if i'm being honest#anyway i seriously need this season to come out quickly... i'm so bored and getting my master's is crushing my soul#i need frivolity#ALSO btw i won't respond to hateful messages about this so please don't bother. it's not that serious. this is a netflix show
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So another thing I want to talk about post-veilguard re: the lore. There's been plenty of long explorations of the de-fanging or just skipping entirely when it comes to the political stuff and I think the topic's been covered pretty well by others at this point, so I won't dwell on that. But I do want to talk a bit about the higher, more mystical lore with respect to gods/religions and the direction it's taken since inquisition's dlcs. Because... ngl, I didn't love it then, and I don't love it now
(Veilguard spoilers, but this also is about inquisition's dlcs too)
So. First off: I have not actually played the descent or trespasser. Because, at the time they were released, I was playing on previous gen consoles and thus I literally could not buy them even if I’d wanted to (and at the time, I did want to). I maintain that was incredibly dumb 10 years later, given trespasser was the actual ending of the game locked behind a price tag, but let's not beat skeletal horses huh lmao
Anyway. So I have only read about the events of those on the wiki/in people's posts (I don't enjoy watching let's plays unless it's someone doing something weird so). I own all the dlcs now, as I now have a computer that can run the game and I bought all of them, but every attempt to replay inquisition since my insane fervour when it first released has failed. I just can't finish the game, so I can't play the dlcs. Anyway. All of this to say: my knowledge of what happens in them may be skewed and even wrong. But I'm gonna talk about the topics anyway, so please feel free to chime in if I’ve got something wrong
So firstly: the titans. I remember really not liking this development when the dlc came out cause like. What? I read the wiki page then (and again recently, cause I remembered very little lmao) and honestly I still don't like it cause it just feels so... at odds with everything else in the lore? Idk. I still don't get how it fits in with absolutely anything. Feels out of nowhere and doesn’t really fit. But okay, they’re here now, and I’ll talk about their tie in to the rest of the lore later. But suffice to say: it just felt like a weird thing then and I maintain it does now too. Like it just doesn’t fit and feels like a weirdly forced addition. I guess that’s personal opinion but I gotta say it
But the bigger part of this is. The sort of... removal of all religions in Thedas for the sake of just. Elves were everything? At first, I really disliked the rewriting of elven gods as tyrants cause it's like... the simple, silly elves mourning everything they lost but actually what they lost was oppression and slavery even worse than today!!! That has implications I really dislike. But now it's... okay Tevinter gods? Well, people worshipping dragons makes sense, even if they weren't really gods - sike! They weren't just dragons either, they were fucked up dragons controlled by the elven gods. The elven gods which aren't even gods, but really just random people. Except those people were also fade spirits made physical. But still not gods! It's important that they are not in fact gods and just powerful mages! Oh also the maker is bullshit too and Solas was the maker, at least in the context of the golden city story (I'm actually fine with the maker and that story specifically not being real it's just. The combo of everything, you know). Also the elven not-gods destroyed the titans too! So also dwarven problems were their fault too! And destroying the titans created the fucking BLIGHT!!! You know, the worst thing to ever exist! Everything comes back to just these guys!!!
Like. It’s all Solas and the Evanuris all the way down. Everything is just them. It makes the world feel so… small. I don't like how everything's just narrowing in on one thing here? Fantasy with different races and religions are fun because it's like. I found the original stories interesting. The story of the elven gods and the forgotten ones being locked away by a trickster so that only he remains is such classic myth shit. I enjoy that. Lyrium being a weird, magic rock that just exists and also it’s poison? Yeah, that makes sense - we have radioactivity in real life lmao, why can't rocks be weird in a land of magic. The blight just. Existing as an evil thing, either as a result of the golden city story or something else - that’s also fine. And as much as the andrastian religion has done some terrible stuff (and the like. it just being christianity but jesus was a woman this time is kind of boring), the concept of worshipping an absent god is actually pretty interesting
And now it just feels like
Idk to me it feels so limited to just boil all of these interesting mythologies and beliefs down to just... well it was all the Evanuris. Everything was the Evanuris. Also they weren't even gods, they were just terrible. There are no gods in this world. If you want a religion, better bring paragon worship to the surface or go join the Qun cause apparently they're the only ones who have any kind of factual stuff going on in their religions (for now, at least lmao)
I recall seeing a post somewhere asking why no one in this game is religious at all. Well, I think this is why: most of the religions are about to not exist anymore. The dwarves are mostly okay, cause paragons are just ancestors, they were real people (though I'm sure there are some who's history has been distorted). Like the titan thing is a thing but idk how bothered most dwarves are by that, it’s not really brought up much. The Qun doesn’t have any sort of deity that we know of so like. They're okay. Except they don't have a military so. That's a problem for the nation, which could lead to the religion ceasing to exist if anyone decides to conquer them back after all the shit. Idk. I'm an atheist irl lmao so this feels kinda weird to harp on but it is very weird to me for a fantasy game to just. Destroy all the gods and beliefs like that. I suppose it's a unique choice but still... Why
(I also just remembered we still have the Avvar I guess, but they worship spirits, no? Which are also not really gods, but at least that’s also a believable religious concept. I’ve never seen a fantasy setting with no real gods before honestly. It’s a very bold choice, one I’m not sure I like)
And maybe! I'm missing something, either something that was maybe hidden in a codex or book I haven’t read or something that happened in one of the dlcs I haven't played but. Idk. The world of thedas feels just so small and cramped now that we know that everything most citizens of the world has ever believed was false and just boiled down to a small handful of old timey tyrants. Even the falseness I could deal with, but the limiting of just. Oh it was all just these guys. That’s it. All them. That's just... I don't like it. The larger context of dragon age lore is… idk it’s been getting smaller and smaller since the end of inquisition and I don’t like that
I started drafting this partway through playing and one of the things I also talked about was ‘where the hell are future games going to go now???’ but now I’ve also seen the secret ending and that… once again implies there’s something bigger behind absolutely everything? I sincerely hope that’s in a like. Subtle influence thing and not ‘oh yeah, Loghain and Bartrand were actually ~manipulated~’ way cause taking away their agency makes them infinitely less interesting characters (plus Bartrand already has the lyrium idol as part of the reason he did what he did). Like pls don’t let this turn into an idea that people can’t just do terrible things. Please, we really don’t need that. That may not be where it’s going but idk, that got my hackles up lmao
AND apparently in the reddit AMA they said they were done with the Evanuris’ story but like… the Evanuris were just everything that’s ever been believed in? I guess they don’t have to personally show up but… idk I kinda figured there’s no way to get away from them now. Also Solas, is still kicking around, even though presumably with the veil being tied to him... assuming he did get out or was freed again, he wouldn't kill himself to tear down the veil, right? Right??? This isn't an issue that may come up one day????? I kinda feel like it's a little bit of a plot hole
But that’s kind of a side point. The larger thing here is how we see the major religions and mythologies in Thedas all just converge on the same thing, a thing which is no longer an issue so. They’re mostly just gone? I can’t imagine the chantry is going anywhere soon (though with the south so thoroughly fucked, who knows, maybe too many people died and the religion will die too cause the political power structure is completely gone – if Tevinter didn’t get a new, good leader during veilguard I’d say they’re definitely going to take advantage of the weakness of the south to make their empire big again. Also ngl I actually think that would be an interesting thing to happen but oh well lmao). Not only are there no actual gods in Thedas, almost every religion was actually this one group and that’s it. That’s just so bizarre to me and I don’t like the implications. Fantasy settings and religions and deities go hand in hand and I guess they don’t have to but. It does feel like the world is smaller now, not bigger
Idk I don’t really have a real big conclusion here it’s just. Why do this? Why tie so much of the lore back to just one group? A group you’re also apparently done with now? And with the secret ending hinting at yet another group that even more things are going to be tied back to… This feels like very simplistic storytelling, not complex storytelling to me. And I don’t like that
#I hope this makes sense#this feels less coherent than what I normally write lmao but I don't really know how else to describe it#and maybe I'm missing some stuff but like. why is it *all* just one group#it's weird and I don't like it#god I'm writing essays again I guess DA fandom really is back lmfao#dragon age#veilguard spoilers#text#meta#shut up nerd#fuck I don't remember my meta tags
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I just *clenches fist with tears in my eyes* love the grand necropolis so much
#just saw the relevant art book pages and like. is there a single sentence said about that place that doesn't slap severely#no! it all rocks out of this world it's quite simply Just That Good. if it has a ground floor no one alive has ever seen it....#an inverse tower of babel they go looking for knowledge in the grave instead of the heavens. hello. for god's sake hello#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#the grand necropolis#as a character note I really like that they emphasize that the mortalitasi KNOW how they're perceived outside of nevarra#and know at least partially how to appear less uh. how they actually are to make the situation more comfortable for outsiders#rook 'code switch champion' ingellvar makes even more sense the deeper you get into the lore haha#this is such good timing b/c I'm closing in rapidly on rye going home for the first time in a year in my replay#and what better time to contemplate the home that is a house of many mansions and that cannot be home anymore#the tower of babel the eden of childhood. it will never change but you have. you can't belong there in life as you once did#you can't go back as you were and you don't know yet that that's alright.#you'll have to bury many versions of yourself until the final day. tend to those graves and let new things grow between them#the necropolis will wait for you. it'll be there to welcome you home in the end no matter what.#it's. just the good stuff is the thing#also can I just say that curio and keepsake asking you if you've returned (...perhaps to stay (i.e. in death)...?) is. so so tender#especially as ingellvar#the fact that the spirits clearly love the watchers *back* in their fashion is sssssssssssssoooooooo.... help#also very funny when rook follows proper watcher protocol with them and they're like 🥰ah so good to see a young watcher#who remembers the importance of *manners*🥰🥰🥰 all hope is not lost. the mourn watch truly is rook's family 2 electric boogaloo
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I've been rewatching the first two seasons of The Bear so I can watch the third season that just came out and man the character writing in this show makes me froth at the mouth it's like some of the best arcs I've ever seen in a TV series
#little infodump in the tags bc no one I know is watching this show so I need to spill all my thoughts somewhere LOL#Richie is my favorite he makes me go ballistic especially in the episode Forks#just rewatched that episode and it always makes me cry when he has his moment where he finally Gets it#he's such a shit stain of a guy I would probably hate him if I knew him in real life lmfao but as a character he is so fantastically writte#I also really love Marcus but he hasn't had as big of a development as Richie has#Sydney is awesome but she's. so much like me in the way where I cringe at her sometimes LMAO#when she's acting super sarcastic and holier than thou I can't look directly at it it's too much like me when I'm at my worst DHF;LKDFH#god I hope Marcus and Sydney get together they are so cute#unusually good chemistry for a straight ship LOL /hj#I also love Tina but my only complaint with her is that I kinda wish her arc in the first season took a little more time#bc she started off as a real asshole just like all the characters did but she had a much more sudden switch#but I guess it makes sense for her now that I think about it bc she's shown to be a very sweet and compassionate person#it's just that she doesn't trust Sydney at first so once she gets over that then she's sweet with her too#excited to learn more about Ebra he reminds me a lot of an old coworker#also obvs no spoilers for season 3 please I haven't got there yet#lyla's talking again
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oh yeah i played a little more isat today and i have to say i just ADORE how the dialogue is written. specifically the way the party can say and do things that upset another, but its treated as just a normal thing that happens and it has no bearing on the story or anything. like i just saw siffrin, bonnie and isabeau make fun of a wilting plant which turned out to be mirabelle's and she became dejected about it, or odile worrying she didn't react well enough to bonnie's snacks even though they were fine. literally one of the first things that happens is siffrin upsetting mirabelle bc they didn't show enough enthusiasm about the sleepover. the characters feel so Human bc they make little mistakes that genuinely upset someone even to each other and i can't think of any other thing i'm into that does it like that. if that makes sense
#clai speaks#really really reeeeally good natural sounding dialogue. they're still clearly all very close friends but that doesnt mean they're--#--immune to butting heads with each other#like yeah interactions like these are probably still hints at the characters actual plot relevant insecurities and flaws#but its just smth about how its shown yknow?? just in passing like its normal#any other game would make it a plot point for a main character to accidentally offend another#also on the topic of dialogue i just really liked the scene where loop tells siffrin their pronouns#i've never seen any media with a character going ''hey my pronouns are x'' before idk it just makes me happy#speaking of siffrin. oh my god they just like me fr#the sieve-like brain. the ''who are you. if not the funnyjokespun guy'' line. the uhhhh Disproprotionate Guilt At Mistakes#the more i find out about siffrin the more afraid i am that this game will kill me on a Personal level BJEVRJBFJFJ#big ramble hello if you got through it all i hope i'm making sense. if you cant tell i am very much enjoying myself!#i'm only on like my third loop i'm still pretty much at the beginning but its already so good and intriguing
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It's been rolling around in my brain the last few days for some reason, but I still hate the family backstory reveals for Sophie and Eliot. I've seen some of the meta for it, but quite frankly, it still makes no sense. If it had been something actually thought of and intentional in the original, I think it could have been so fascinating. I mean, Sophie's willing abandonment of Astrid to contrast with Nate's loss of Sam or Eliot's adoption in contrast with Hardison's and Parker's? Could have been excellent! But they came out of nowhere in Redemption and don't work with these characters.
Sophie was still actively using the fucking alias that she met Astrid under! She met with someone from her past on the show! Like. Quite frankly, that one is unequivocally bullshit that they made up and threw in and pretended could fit with the established canon. (And I'm sorry, but the idea of Sophie abandoning Astrid and never telling Nate about her just... So much of Nate's trauma was rooted in the loss of Sam, and I think that introducing this element after he's gone and unable to respond to it taints Sophie and Nate's relationship in a way bc I'm not exactly sure how Nate would've responded to learning about this but I think that it's something he'd have needed to know. I don't know how to fully express my thoughts on that but yeah.)
As for Eliot, I don't like the adoption aspect literally at all. The way that he would interact with his family and the memory of his family would be different, and I think that it's flat out ridiculous to think that he'd have never mentioned it to the team in the original show, especially when dealing with the kid cases. (I also dislike the biracial adoption as its own element because if Eliot was actually raised by Black parents in the... idk what 80s/90s? That just. doesn't feel congruent with how they write Eliot interacting with PoC, not necessarily in a bad way, but babe, he's written like a white southern man raised in a specific kind of culture that does not jell with that. It also makes Eliot look... really bad that he was apparently raised with the knowledge of how fucked up the military was and his parents' history and made the choices that he did.) Like the show may not have explicitly stated it but the implication of that relationship was vastly fucking different throughout the original show.
Just. These were not backstories that were congruent with their depiction and characters in the original show, and they're also just moves that I don't particularly like or find interesting directions for those characters. There's also something to be said about how it was apparently unacceptable for a woman to not have kids or someone not reconciling with their biological family when that was something that the original show handled a lot better. Out of all the directions to take Sophie and Eliot's stories, that's just not really one that I think was a good idea.
#i'm not sure if i worded this v well tbh which concerns me#bc like. like i said i dont like the adoption plot anyways but part of my problem with that storyline IS that billy is black#bc i don't think that the way eliot is written makes sense if he was raised by a black couple during that decade#bc the way that he would have engaged with his family and community and the world around him would've been different#especially bc he was raised in the fucking south in the 80s#bc i dont think eliot was ever racist in the original show but i dont think that he really knew#how it was different for poc in certain ways that dont make sense if he was raised by a black couple#like the previous implications of his childhood and specifically his father were v much in the stereotypical v pro military be a man cultur#that culture is also v rooted in toxic masculinity and whiteness#God i hope that makes sense bc i feel like that sounds v bad#but i'd love more black characters on the show and i think that for pretty much any other mc that'd have been fine#it's specifically eliot with the space that he occupies that i feel like it's a problem with his backstory#which also is why i dont like that he's adopted at all bc that's an influential part in how you first view your place and family and all th#that i dont think makes sense with eliot's character. like literally nothing about that reveal really feels like it makes sense with eliot#and to move over to sophie for a second i feel like bringing up the abandoned stepdaughter would have been pretty damn important#when sophie was struggling with the idea of who she really was beneath the aliases and the grift#and especially when she's in a relationship with nate who WAS a father like#and that she used the charlotte alias to meet with someone from her past but there wasnt anything about the fallout#which still makes no fricking sense either way#also insert something about sophie being an older woman without kids#(i know there's the ot3 but they're not actually in a position as her kids bc theyre still equals in a sense)#and needing to actually go no no she was a mom! and then bailed and did all this and blah blah but she's always been a mom in her heart <3#and adding in this relationship as if an older woman cant be satisfied or complete without kids#and i know that ppl might bring up parker but like lbr parker is positioned in a v different space narratively than sophie#ofc parker doesn't have kids she's positioned in a space as the Odd one the kinda broken one#her defying the expectations narratively doesnt necessarily work the same bc of her place#idk i kinda hope these dont end up in the main tags bc idk how ppl will respond nor how well i actually got across my points#but i do wanna tag them for my blog so#leverage#sophie devereaux
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this episode is the third one in a row where I've been like 'oh no I don't think it's going to quite be 30 minutes how frustrating' and then I get to the end and it's just over 30 minutes
this isn't very exciting to anyone unless you're me but the fun thing about having such a standardised length of episodes is when you do Fucky Things to the show in a meta-way it becomes REALLY noticeable
#eira speaks#evil laughter#it's not that evil#it kind of is#something big is about to happen in this show lmao you're not ready#god i hope this lands right#anyway enjoy episode 5 we're really getting into the calm before the storm here#and it's already pretty un-calm tbh#i feel like i'm no longer making sense#i've done a lot of sound design today it's broken my little brain a little bit#i had loads of fun though#so who cares?!
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This is literally one of my favorite moments for both Harry Kim and B’Elanna characterization. I think a lot of people forget how soft hearted and altruistic B’Elanna specifically can be while Harry, of course a friendly and sweet individual, devotes himself most often to the mission, his friends and Starfleet’s ideals. Harry’s been shown to be much more down-to-earth and less fantastical in his thinking than either Tom or B’Elanna. The only time he gets in major trouble with Janeway and breaks protocol is because he wants to be with a woman. This is distinctly different to me than Tom’s (attempting to save an alien world) and B’Elanna’s (giving a robot race the ability to reproduce) transgressions. His other biggest infraction is begin a mutiny which he does in order to save Janeway & Chakotay. He doesn’t get in trouble for this which is why I put it last but again it seems different from Tom or B’Elanna to me because it’s For The Ship it’s For The Captain it’s a crime which displays his loyalty to Janeway instead of one which demonstrates him going against her ideologically (as shown by the lack of punishment). In that way I think B’Elanna and Harry balance each other well. B’Elanna is a person who seems very nervous and defensive when in conversation with others, who thinks of herself as a person who is ‘bad’ and doesn’t believe in herself much. Meanwhile Harry seems to be at ease with most anyone he speaks to, attempting to befriend even Seven of Nine right away. He’s confident in himself and his abilities and out of everyone (yes even Tom who seems most often to just become frustrated) would be the one to push B’Elanna and break through her defenses. That’s to say it makes perfect sense that B’Elanna would be absolutely enamored by this person who views her as inspiring, would be struck by that while Harry views it as just a weird question.
#I do n't know if I'm being coherent enough...but I really like this scene!!!#and I really like both B'Elanna and Harry Kim!!#st voyager#You might say 'It's just bc B'Elanna's been with these people'#BUT I REALLY think that Harry wouldn't have gone through with the whole 'participating in a play exit'...I think if it was Harry the episode#would have been one of those that ended with him looking sadly out a window like 'It's damn hard to follow protocol sometimes...' but he'd#see no other option#I REALLY hope I'm being uhh understandable HEHEH#whenever I ramble like this I'm like 'Bea you're not making any sense'#also thispost is dedicated to the folks who yell at me (affectionate) about putting the majority of my post in the tags HEHHEHE#I finally di d it...I put the whole post up there...#I was really going to just put 'This is one of my favorite characterization moments' up there and put the rest of that in the tags#but then I was like no...they need the whole thought process#labeling Harry Kim as just 'sweet boi uwu' and B'Elanna as 'fiesty angry lady' is a real disservice to their characters#and might be rooted in some OTHER things#like CERTAIN preconceptions#I think Harry's biggest established fears are not being particular special and being underestimated or babied#But none of those fears seem to drive his behavior the way B'Elanna's do#....God I hope this information is correct I always put this shit in the tags bc I'm afraid someone's gonna reblog this like#'Bea none of this happened what are you talking about' and I'll look it up and I'll be like what WAS I talking about#B'Elanna Torres#Harry Kim#Harry's fears also demonstrate that he thinks of himself as 'good' and more worries others won't be able to see it or he won't stand out#enough for it to matter - again much more confident than B'Elanna
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"sara snow" as if that could have ever been a real name. get real. That is a drag name
#I'm kidding#if we're getting serious i think the reason Lol cregan is twinky is funny to me is mostly just because#in like. reddit threads and shit he's always fawned over as like this awesome gruff masculine man who Gets Shit Done and is Powerful and#Correct and Just and Fixes everything. Well what will reddit guys do when he is just a 21 year old bisexual beet counter Oh god we've just#done jon again sorry never mind#but yea lets subvert the masculine ideal ladiesssss ^_^#thats what im here for ^______^ i hope preston jacobs gets really mad about it *___*#cause like it's interesting that aegon and rhaenyra both fail their genders in certain ways#(failing your gender is good dont get me mixed up)#but aegon cant get it up and he's emasculated and disabled and Literally gets cucked ?#and we dont even have time to get into rhaenyra right now#so the idea of some kind of Northern Real Man TM storming in and being the 'corrective' to that is a bit weird#UNLESS he is gay and mean abotu it.#also not to imply that the realm is 'fixed' at the end of the dance systemic rot is systemic etc#^ idk what any of that meant it's late and if it doesnt make sense dont yell at me about it
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I put 30 tags on that dear evan hansen post. for the love of god don't click to expand the tags I'm so fucking sorry I just hate that awful fucking show so fucking much. oh fuck I've done it again in the tags here oh god
#theo.txt#I just realized more fucked up bullshit in the show while I was typing is all#and then wasted like an hour checking lyrics to make sure I wasn't misreading#no they do have zoe immediately backtrack her assertion that she won't let her brother's death change her view of their relationship (bad)#even though death and especially suicide often leads to valorization of the deceased#but all it takes is Evan's little connor pov song about all the things he (connor(evan)) noticed about her.#which are all very cute and extremely romantically coded.#and she takes this at face value! despite many of the listed traits being extremely odd things for a sibling to notice!#especially one she had a volatile to abusive relationship with!!! what the fuck!!!!#like ig you could argue. she's hoping he did secretly care and Evan's a new perspective that's not her parents#or on a meta level it's arguing that teens acting violently or abusively often lack other emotional and communicative outlets#however. the song is not good enough to be attempting either </3#textually it seems like it's trying to do the former in that at no point does zoe see through Evan's premise and responds entirely genuinely#however. booo hiss that makes no sense evan is doing a horrible job of hiding his crush#and zoe either thinking connor was noticing her sexually or just not picking up on it?? for the sake of the duet?? either is bad.#in the former that only gives her more reason to shut off from him and from evan#and the latter just makes her and the writing worse lmfao#Alternatively if we're playing that connor was actually really sweet like evan and she (or we) could and should believe he'd say this#and he didn't know how to express his feelings (even these kind soft observant ones) except through violence#targeted at the objects of those feelings nonetheless!!!!! he cared for zoe but didn't know how to show it and so he harmed her!!!!#and therefore not only should we empathize with him but she should forgive him and immediately relinquish her anger after his death#because he was just so misunderstood and he cared :( never mind her experience directly affected by his actions#shit piss fuck take on humanizing people who abuse or do other violent acts. Dylan klebold apologia ass song#I'm not even like. God I'm all for trying to understand why people engage in destructive behaviors for the purpose of preventing them!#I'm for recognizing the personhood of every human including those who do terrible things. I think we have to.#NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!#god. again. everyone who talked abt this show saving teen mental health owes me money for my 2016 experiences.#also they should have to watch next to normal.
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(mgv) WOAH OK I JUST GOT BREAKING NEWS ON MGV BIOLOGY!!! KIND OF GROSS!!! INTERESTING TOO (update: i've been typing for at least one straight hour)
re: the term "litters" (disclaimer i am not in the medical field but i do like to look at diagrams) (second disclaimer this ended up being an anatomy lesson i am sorry ? )
okay so i have been wondering this entire time about the actual reproductive capabilities of people in the mgv. and where "litters" come from if (depending on the creator's own canon i guess) most folk are just having single babies. that's how it goes for my version of it anyway. so where do "litters" come in??
first we look at how doctors would define sex at birth, just male or female. OBVIOUSLY this the most basic, un-nuanced take of dimorphism anyway BUT i am not in the headspace to go into that tangent. just penis or vagina (if you're intersex gosh are they gonna try to fuck you over :( awful stuff) right, uterus or testes.
their secondary sexes don't show any signs outwardly for the first 15ish? years because their secondary systems are dormant. it depends on the person, 15 is just the minimum age they'll allow (i imagine this is a hot button topic). presentation any time under the age of 15 is incredibly dangerous because the process can put enough stress on the body to send them into cardiac arrest among countless other problems.
the secondary systems veer this way and that. the organs themselves adjust themselves not unlike gonads in embryos that can shift until it decides (through nature, nurture, whatever it may be is unknown) on alpha, beta, or omega.
alphas end up developing sperm (or bolstering pre-existing systems if they already do), are probably hellish to raise in a traditionalist family. dicks get knots, clits become knots during rut. the organs anchor in the front internally close to the primary reproductive system to bind with them.
omega organs will go backwards instead and attach to the lower GI tract and fuse into it and the ends balloon into a secondary uterus. omegas in heat are mechanically constipated -- no really. the canal gets swollen and inflamed and closes the colon, it's a workaround for the fact it's anal impregnation and is where you suspend your disbelief a little more okay.
betas are people whose secondary organs don't pass the arbitrary guideline on the spectrum of "omega" and "alpha". betas vary the most while also carrying over less of the more extreme traits in alphas or omegas in moods, instincts, urges, etc. secondary fertility varies with some factoring into their primary systems (male betas might get pregnant, female betas possibly could impregnate) while some betas' secondary reproductive systems don't develop much at all (this is the closest we get to irl people)
back to my original point. litters
male alphas and female omegas are the most standard coupling. since the ice age, since female omegas had the best odds of keeping the genetic line going. the term litters for humans came not from how many babies (or pups) were born at a time, but because since both primary and secondary reproductive systems can be impregnated, F-O can have more than one baby in succession. the fetuses of F-O individuals can have different fathers, and can be smaller than babies born singularly to prevent interference with F-O's mobility
while the rate of "litters" as a statistic has gone down over the course of evolution, the use of the term has stayed surprisingly steady. in cases of "true twins" (identical or fraternal twins who developed in the same womb) (or triplets or etc) some folks consider that a litter. "false twins" are those that develop one fetus per primary/secondary systems and are the only ones that ever qualify in textbooks as "litters"
#hmmmm how do i. how do i tag this.#mgv#nsft#i guess i gotsta go back and tag all my mgv posts 4realz now#but this is just my like. personal lore diary or whatever#because i like to Think Too Hard about it#talk of like reproductive system not just the fun genital parts#systems for both primary and secondary sets#i am coming at this with all the body and sex positivity as i possibly can#and i'm a little stoned but so passionate so i really really hope this makes sense to me in a couple hours#i talked. too much. oh my god i'm looking back at it. where am i
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Presenting: The Great KinnPorsche Fashion Showdown (nobody asked for)
A few weeks ago, I made a poll about the best dressed KinnPorsche character. Tankhun won that one, followed by Vegas and Tay. Legitimate results - but the tags had some really interesting arguments for a bunch of different contenders. So why don't we take a closer look? Why don't we go through all the characters and their outfits one by one, choose the best one for each of them and repeat the initial poll at the end?
Sooo...that's exactly what we're doing right now.
*For the characters with more than 10 outfits - like Kim here - I'm going to make multiple polls and put the best voted ones into a final one
Tankhun - Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | FINAL CONTENDERS (CLOSED) - WINNER: THE CAPE 🎉🎉🎉
Vegas - Part 1 (CLOSED) | Part 2 (CLOSED) | Part 3 (CLOSED) | FINAL CONTENDERS (RED VELVET SHIRT*TM vs. THE WITCHY SHIRT*TM vs. GREEN SATIN SHIRT) - (closes March 28th!!!!!)
Kim - Part 1 (closes March 26th) | FINAL CONTENDERS coming March 30th
You can find the links to all the polls (as I gradually post them) HERE (pinned on my profile).
LET'S GET VOTING! 🎉
#I was so incredibly tired when I namend the voting options. That's my excuse for some of them.#But I'm not REALLY sorry for them - because I made myself laugh really hard. 🤣#what I'm sorry for though is the blurriness of some of the pictures. I just gave up on the screenshots at some point.#Kim is a man of secrets and bl00dshed and impossible to capture in a good screen grab sometimes. And that's life. 🤷🏻♀️#anyways#you can still vote in the first poll for Kim's best outfit - it's open till Sunday#and we're also live with Vegas' FINAL CONTENDERS poll right now!#God I hope any of this makes sense because my sleepy brain can't think#kinnporsche the series#the great kinnporsche fashion showdown#kinnporsche polls#kim theerapanyakul#jeff satur#kinnporsche fashion#kinnporsche outfits#kinnporsche costumes#in the queue you go
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