#Foster System
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Having biological kids can be impossible/impractical for many reasons including you/your partner not having the relevant combination of parts, infertility, age, disability or illness, etc.
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We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
#polls#incognito polls#anonymous#tumblr polls#tumblr users#questions#polls about relationships#submitted june 6#kids#family#family planning#adoption#foster system
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The Flash: Why should I listen to you? You're like 10!
Robin: Why should I listen to the guy that's married to his sister!
The Justice League: WTF
The Flash: She's not my sister!
The Justice League: phew
The Flash: She's my foster sister!
The Justice League: That's barely any better!
Robin: I definitely would not date my foster sibling(s).
#can you tell#i'm rewatching#the flash#the flash 2014#damian wayne#damian al ghul#robin damian#dc robin#dc comics#batman#dcu#dc universe#batfam#foster family#foster system#foster siblings#no batcest#canon incest#barry x iris#it's so weird#like maybe don't marry your sister??#and they never address it in canon
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Let’s talk foster system reform. What needs to change and how would you change it?
#open discussion#foster care#foster system#prolife#pro life#i am the prolife generation#prolife feminist#womens rights#prolife feminism#politics#roe v wade#feminism
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The British Columbia government is opening to all ages its tuition waiver for those who were in foster care in the province.
The program was launched in 2017, waiving fees for people who had been in care from the ages of 19 to 26, but starting next August, that restriction will be eliminated.
To be eligible for the program, students must be studying full or part time at an undergraduate level at a B.C. public post-secondary institution, the Native Education College or one of 10 approved trades-training providers.
It also allows for as much as $3,500 a year to cover educational expenses such as textbooks, internet costs and computers. [...]
Continue Reading.
Tagging: @politicsofcanada
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Foster system whump!
Whumpee getting tossed from home to home with no say in the matter, never knowing what kind of home they'll be placed in. The weeks of walking on eggshells, trying to determine where the boundaries are.
Whumpees who can't believe that Caretaker just wants them to be happy.
On the other hand, Whumpees who very quickly believe that Caretaker is only in it to help them feel better.
Caretaker who is an older Whumpee in the same home.
Whumpers who keep applying for fosters, keep getting called out on being bad, yet never seem to be put on a do-not-let-foster list...
Whumpers who spoil their Whumpee, but every gift comes with expectations.
Whumper parents who never interact with their foster child, simply leave Whumpee to fend for themself. Any time they ask for something, it always comes with some sort of punishment.
Rich Caretaker who has fostered multiple Whumpees, maybe at the same time.
Caretakers who are decidedly not rich, barely doing what they can to get by, but are determined to give Whumpee everything they want.
Caretaker who is fostering for the first time, and is way out of their depth with Whumpee. But they still do their best.
#whumpblr#whump scenario#writing prompt#whump#your whump words of the day#whump community#whump tropes#whump prompt#foster system
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My former home state wants to send LGBTQ foster kids to violent homphobic/transphobic families.
As someone who grew up in a racist family and had an aunt (who wasn't exactly against child abuse) adopt TWO black kids, I know how bad these things can go. Now, that aunt complains about her kid's behavior, but doesn't help them. She says, "We're leaving it in God's hands."
Please keep kids away from this. No one should be punished for existing. Even if you, "don't agree with the lifestyle" or think it's gross, you surely aren't a fan of child abuse.
Please sign the petition. Politicians do NOT represent my home state.
#lgbt#lgbtqia#lgbtq#lgbtq+#queer#trans rights#feminism#men's issues#men's rights#men's liberation#politics#us politics#world politics#foster system#adoption#tn#tennessee#the south#american south#petition#signal boost
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the damage of being in the troubled teen industry is slowly starting to seep out of my skin n i think i am loosing my mind a little bit
#JUST SMILE AND WAVE BOYS#me when i start to realize what it’s done to me#i feel so disgusting i want to r!p my skin off#i truly feel like i’m becoming a monster#or i’ve been a monster idk#i don’t consider myself a TTI survivor#no one physically harmed me but like#something about being put in a system where you’re constantly told that you are a fuck up and a bad person#actually traumatized#troubled teen industry#troubled youth system#actually ptsd#foster system
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I find it so sad that OUAT ended up making the foster system as such a nightmare full of bad experiences and opportunistic people - my opinion over this is also affected by the fact that most fanfiction has Emma's experience in the foster system as terrible (not to say that they are wrong since it does seem like Emma's experience was in fact terrible).
But this is to say that I put Emma's experience with foster family/adoptive family against the Shazam! movie foster family depiction. And while I understand that OUAT wanted to have Emma's experience as bad as it was to influence her own thoughts and feelings, it does sadden me that they seem to have this "biological family good, adoptive family bad". Because even Ingrid/Sarah was made into a bad person, a villain whose only redemption was death. And Ingrid was someone who cared for Emma as a daughter. Yes, it was shown as simply being influenced by the fact that Emma was one of her replacement sisters but if it was only that, Ingrid wouldn't have sacrificed herself.
Again, I understand the need for that emotional trauma (more or less) for character development, I do, it just feels like it was beating a dead horse basically - the foster system is already viewed in such a bad light that it would have been refreshing for them to do something different.
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Talking to Strangers
MULTI-CHAPTER 4/? LINK TO A03
The man on the desk look at her with a scold. Penny definitely didn’t look like she belonged there, with her hand-me-down clothes and although being fifteen, she looked thirteen, fourteen at best.
No matter what the man thought, she had a badge and when scanned, all her information appeared.
______________
Two days after one of the most successful therapy session she ever had, mostly because Tyler leave her alone, she came home from school to find two more boys than usual. Her oldest foster sister, Jolene, was the one that told her the situation, but Penny already had an idea of what was going on.
Her first thought was where they were going to sleep.
Foster parents that took more than three children that aren’t siblings are prone to take more.
That is exactly what happened in the new place she was living. Now, two weeks after her arrival, the already overpopulated house was made home to another two kids, siblings. When Penny came, the house already had 5 kids, with her they were made 6, now there were 8.
Another fun fact about the foster parents that take too many kids, is they do it for the money.
Penny admitted that saying that was unfair, not all situations were the same, but most of them had that in common. Mrs. and Mr. Miller, her actual foster parents, were one of those.
Jolene was the one to explain all of the brothers’ backstory. Tom and Robert, six and four, respectively. An abusive drug addict father that ended up killing their mother.
“Lucky that they were at school when it happened” Jolene had said, and Penny couldn’t help but to agree. The last thing those kids needed was to witness their mother’s murder.
Jolene had already given up her bed, and Penny as the second oldest, was quick to follow.
When Penny arrived, there was only one room designated for kids. It was big enough to put six beds, three on each size, and at the time, it was perfect. Now they had a 4 and a 6 year old boys, that needed a bed. Jolene was 17 while Penny was fifteen, they could live without one. The room also had one dresser chest that luckily, had eight drawers, so that was one thing they shouldn’t worry about.
The boys were scared, and Penny could understand it. She and her brother weren’t that young when they ended up on foster care, but she remember when her parents died. Even if she could live wither aunt and uncle, it was a new house and a new country.
Penny wondered what would have happened if her aunt and uncle weren’t there at the time. Aunt May was a consolation as she sometimes spoke in Italian, like her mother used to do. Uncle Ben was so much like her father and always told them stories about him when they were sad. She couldn’t imagine the grieving process without them in the picture.
It was 5 in the afternoon, and she was watching the two brothers play. Suddenly she felt as she couldn’t breathe. Although of the gender and the age difference, she couldn’t help but to compare Tom and Robert to her and her own brother. Alone except for each other.
Unable to stop picturing her twin and her and the other setoff siblings, she leave the room, ignoring Jolene’s worried look.
The other day, her journey to the cemetery was a long one, after all, her foster home was in Manhattan, while All Faiths Cemetery was at Queens. A trip there was out of the question, as she would be back after curfew and dinner.
Suddenly, she remember the conversation with the Avengers that she had yesterday. Penny searched through her backpack, hoping she hadn’t put the new badge on her drawer at the house. A really low probability, but one you couldn’t discard. Much to Penny’s relief the badge was there. With the odds of being thrown out lower, she made her way to Avengers Tower.
______________
The man on the desk look at her with a scold. Penny definitely didn’t look like she belonged there, with her hand-me-down clothes and although being fifteen, she looked thirteen, fourteen at best.
No matter what the man thought, she had a badge and when scanned, all her information appeared. He told her which elevator to take and began to type on his computer.
On the elevator, a female voice spoke.
“Hello, Miss Parker, I am FRIDAY, Tony Stark’s Artificial Intelligence, which floor would you like to go?” Penny thought about it for a while before concluding she didn’t know what the hell she was doing.
“I am looking for Mr. Stark. Or any Avenger” Before the AI could answer, she added “They told me I could come.”
“I am aware of your relationship with the Avengers, I can take you to Mr. Stark’s floor right now.
Penny let out a relief sound. After the initial rush had come down, she thought that maybe it wasn’t one of her best ideas to come here and just ask to see the Avengers, one of the most famous people in New York and people that had many enemies. She wondered how many people came asking to see an Avenger.
When the elevator stopped she come face to face with Tony Stark. He look at her, worry clear on his face. She tried to talk, but the right words just wouldn’t come out of her mouth.
“Is anyone else here?” Even if she trusted the Avengers more than she previously did, that didn’t that she wanted to parade her problems to all of them. Especially not Steve Rogers that although he had apologized, she still didn’t feel right to her. Her feelings had to do, perhaps, with the similarities that the Captain had with a man that belonged to Penny’s past.
“Everyone is on the communal floor, but I can call someone if you are more comfortable?” It was obvious that Tony felt that something was wrong, but he couldn’t tell why.
Penny shook* her head. “I was hoping I could talk to you, and you told me I could come whenever I wanted.”
“I did say that kid, don’t worry.” He gestured to the very expensive sofa and waited until she had sat down before doing it himself. “What do you need?”
“Today two more kids arrived at my foster home.” She paused a little before continuing. “Now we are eight, but that doesn’t matter.” This time when she paused she looked at him expecting an answer.
“Do these kids make you uncomfortable?” That was a good question. Was she uncomfortable? Quick answer was yes, but not in the way he was thinking. Also, was ‘uncomfortable’ the right word? She thought that it wasn’t.
“They are six and four and they scared. They had barely talk to me” She could tell he was confused.
“So, what is the problem?” He seemed kind when asking that, but so did many bad people. Tyler was seen kind by most, maybe annoying, but Penny knew. If her shitty life had taught her something was to not judge a book by its cover. It didn’t matter the cover was nice or bad.
Thinking more, she suddenly felt stupid. She probably was worrying Tony for no reason. Of course, a sibling relationship would remind Penny of hers and her brother’s relationship, they were siblings.
“You know what, it is stupid and shouldn’t have come. You are probably very busy and…” She was already standing up when Tony took her wrist.
“I can assure you that nothing you are having troubles with is stupid” At her look of disbelief he added. “I once heard that it doesn’t matter that you are drowning of a glass of water, you are still drowning. I promise that I will listen and help as much as I can. It is your decision if you want to.” With that, he let go her wrist, that wasn’t held with any force. Pre- spider bit Penny could have broken free if she wanted.
She pondered at to what to do. Looking at Tony’s eyes she saw something that she hadn’t seen in a very long time. An actual desire to help.
With that she took the decision that would most like it change her whole life.
She trusted Tony Stark.
“They remind me of me and my brother.” She finally began, after sitting on the sofa again. “So scared, yet they have each other.” Penny look down at her lap. “Everything was easier when I had my brother with me.”
Tony remains in silence, waiting for her to continue. When she made it apparent that she wasn’t going to say anything, he began talking.
“When my parents died, I didn’t cope well. I began drinking and smoking, all so I could forget the pain for a while. I was destroying myself.” Penny wondered where this was going. “A year later or so I decided I couldn’t continue that way and it work for a while, until I visited Rhodey’s mom. She is a wonderful lady that would always let me stay at her house on holidays when visiting my dad was too much.”
Tony looked at her, like he was debating on continuing.
“When I was watching both of them interact I couldn’t help but missing my mom. You see my dad could have been a bastard, but my mother, she was an angel. She loved me and I wish I could have said that I loved her more than I did.” He made a pause again. Penny could see it was difficult. “That night I drank so much that I ended up on the hospital.” He look at her directly in her eyes. “It is okay if you miss your brother, kid. It is natural that little things will remind you of him, and I will not say you will ever forget him or that you will stop hurting, but from experience.” He took her hand. “It will hurt less, and when you remember him, you will not cry, you will laugh, happy for the memories you have with him.”
“I don’t feel like I will feel better.”
“This won’t happen tomorrow or in a week. It takes time. Right now, you only see dark, but I assure you there is always light.”
And for the second time in this day, Penny took a decision that will change her life.
She believe Tony Stark.
And she also hugged Tony Stark.
______________
Natasha knew something changed.
She wasn’t sure if it began the day Penny punched Tyler or later, when Tony gave her a badge. The thing was that at the moment, although she could see that Penny was grateful, she didn’t look like she was going to take the offer.
That is why, when Tony came to the communal floor the day after giving Penny her badge, saying the girl had come to the Tower, she was surprised. He didn’t say the reason behind the visit, only that she had already left.
After that day, Penny was a constant in the tower. She was a little more open with them, but mostly Tony. It made Natasha wonder what exactly happened that Thursday that made the young girl trust the man so much. The thing that troubled her the most, in a bad way, was how every positive favor that the girl show Tony was like it was taken from Steve. While Penny wasn’t rude like she was with Tyler, she wasn’t friendly and if Natasha was honest, it confused her more than anything ever had in her lifetime.
She had figured out that Penny Parker was a mystery. She obviously didn’t trust easily. She was still wary with all of them, never talking about anything personal, and watching al of their moves, but she seemed to be more wary of Steve. Never talking with him unless he talked to her directly, and she avoided him in favor of others.
At first, Natasha thought that it had something to do with the recent conflict between Tony and Steve, and as Penny seemed to like Tony, she immediately disliked Steve. Her theory was quickly refuted by Penny forming an unlikely friendship with Bucky.
It seemed that for now, Penny Parker would remain to be a mystery.
#spider man#spiderman#peter parker#penny parker#iron man#tony stark#marvel#MCU#foster care#foster system#steve rogers#natasha romanoff#bucky barnes
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TW: child abuse, rape
I saw that @prince-peachie has brought to attention the fact that most of abused children don't "look like they are being abused" (literally the phrase you mostly hear people say about abused kids) and they even shared an article about signs of abuse on children that I will link bellow and highly recomend you to read it, especially if you are often in contact with kids (like teachers, babysitters, bigger cousins, etc.).
In the post they use Andrew Minyard to start the talk, as Andrew was a abused child whose responsible adults never noticed or stopped his abusers. Peach says in that post that there is a big chance that the social workers and foster parents he had really didn't know about what was happening. I particularly believe in that version because from what I know it is a very frequent reality and I would like to use their post to bring a related topic on this discussion.
The fact that these people, the people that are supposed to protect the kids, can't see when they are hurt shows how unprepared these people are to be in these positions in first place. I am not saying that we should blame who didn't see it, but the system has to be blamed. People with good intentions commit mistakes too, however in these situations fails can take the life of someone. Is it normal that I (someone who works with adults, lives with adults, is friend with adults) don't know how to identify child abuse victims? Yes. Is it normal that a child's guardian doesn't know how to identify abuse victims? Hell no! These people should be prepared for worst case scenario, they should have to be trained before ever getting a hold of a child's guard. I know social workers already study and are trained, but clearly there is something wrong with their work execution. And foster families, they go so far to make it difficult to some people (homosexuals, transgenders) to foster, but can't even prepare them to deal with traumatized kids? Can't teach them what is suspicious children behaviour?
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Can you write on more with the 'Hiding Places' oneshot? Pretty please? 😅
Of course I can! This is a little more angsty than the last one.
Hiding Places Part 1
“Jack… they want to adopt your brothers…”
Jack’s grip tightened in the arms of the chair he was sitting in. He shook his head. “N-no, I… I’m gonna do that—“
“James, I need you to remain calm,” his social worker said, like that would be enough to stop Jack from panicking. His knuckles went white from the grip. “You are too young to be their legal guardian, they need stability and a mother and a father who love them—“
“I love them!” Jack cried. “I love them and I am the only one who knows them! They need me! They…” When the boy realized he was yelling, he shook his head. “They need me,” he tried again. “Racer— Tyler James, he’s special, he needs someone who understands him, and that’s me, I am the only one that understands him, and Charlie needs someone who ain’t gonna treat him like he’s fragile or different—“ he continued on, even as the woman began to speak over him.
“I understand that you’re upset, Jack—“
“Oh, do you know that I’m upset?! You know what I’m going through?! You sympathize with me? You have no idea what this is like—!” Jack screamed, tears in his eyes and something foreign in his chest. It was almost like being abandoned all over again, but this time he was the one abandoning his babies and he didn’t even have a choice.
The social worker sighed. “I know this is hard, but look at the statistics, honey,” she tried. “You’re aging out. Most kids who age out end up incarcerated, addicted or… or dead, Jack. We want you to be able to focus on yourself instead of killing yourself for these kids that other people can support better—“
“Fuck you!” Jack shouted, standing up and storming out of that office.
His fosters had brought him here because they said his social worker wanted to prepare him for his aging out and getting an apartment. He felt like he couldn’t breathe.
So he walked home and slammed the door shut. Charlie was smiling on the floor with Race who was reading Harry Potter out loud to him. Charlie’s smile fell a bit when he saw Jack. “Jackie?”
“Where’s Hannah an’ Bertram?” Jack asked.
Charlie squinted. “They went on a date night, said they’d bring us back dinner.”
Race didn’t protest when Jack walked over to him and easily scooped him up. He just curled up in his arms like a toddler who was being held by the person who they trusted more than anyone in the world. Jack kissed his head. “Pack a bag…” he whispered to Charlie. “We’re leaving,” he insisted, grabbing some of Race’s books and shoving them in his backpack before heading to the bedroom.
A confused Charlie chased after him. “What are you talking about, Jack?”
“They're trying to take you away from me, so I’m taking you first. And if you wanna stay, I’ll take Race. He’s my baby and they don’t get to just shove me out of the picture—“
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Charlie insisted when he saw Race beginning to panic. “Jack, calm down, what are you doing?”
Still shoving Race’s things into his bag, Jack replied, “I already told you, I’m taking my baby and I’m leaving. Are you coming or not?”
“No, Jack, I’m not coming, are you insane?” Charlie snapped. “Where do you think you’re gonna take him? How are you gonna feed him? When will be go ta school? Jack, you haven’t thought this through—“
Jack set Race down on the dresser. “Hey, Ty, look at me, I got a question,” he insisted. The boy sniffled and wiped at his nose. “You want Hannah an’ Bertram to adopt you or you wanna stay with Jackie?” he asked.
The kid grasped at Jack’s shirt. “Jackie,” he answered without any hesitation.
With a shrug, Jack looked over to Charlie. “See?”
Charlie rolled his eyes. “Oh that’s good, let the ten year old decide what’s best for him, that’s a good idea, hey, Racer, you want candy for dinner? You wanna sit in a dark room and read all day?”
Race scowled a little and collapsed against Jack’s chest. Jack just ran a hand over his hair and continued packing. “I can take care of him. I’ll pick up extra shifts at the diner—“
“You mean after you get arrested for kidnapping?” Charlie snapped.
“Then I’ll take him out west! Are you coming or not?”
Charlie scowled. “No, Jack,” he hissed. “I’m not coming. And I can’t stop you. I know that. But you’re taking my baby brother away now, and I won’t lie to no one who wants ta bring him somewhere safe. I’m not gonna protect you if you do this.”
Jack held Race close to him. Then he slung his bag over his shoulder and walked over to Charlie, kissing his head. “I love you,” he whispered before heading for the door.
And Charlie just watched him, his heart shattering in his chest as he was left alone.
#anonymous#anon#anon ask#newsies#newsies live#newsies musical#newsies au#newsies fanfiction#modern newsies#modern au#modern era#modern#much love#jack kelly#racetrack higgins#crutchie morris#foster system#running away#brothers
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Sometimes I think of the other foster kids who flashed through my 10 years in the home...and I miss them. For a while, we shared a house, a creed, a longing to leave...and all of us survived it.
For a while each and everyone were my siblings and my hear aches from missing then so much. I know time has cut our ties, life has moved on...we are different people now.
I just hope they know that they are still in my heart, faded but strong. I'm so proud of us for getting out and growing out of those pains.
I miss you. You made my decade better, even if you only stayed a portion of it.
#foster kid#foster system#siblings#i saw a dream that had be thinking of you all again#i wish we would have been able to keep in touch#take care
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REVIEW
A Safe Place by Becky Flade
Philly Heat #6
Excellent ~ Hooked on the first page and couldn’t put the book down till the last page was read ~ Great addition to the series!
What I liked:
* Kat Anderson: lost her grandmother/guardian, runaway from foster home, murder witness, waiting for her brother, survivor, bright, resilient, typical teenager, loving, kind, caring, has a great future
* Maddie O’Hara: social worker, grew up in the foster system, guarded, puts clients first, trust issues, bright, caring, protective, bonds with Kat, attracted to Nate
* Nate Anderson: Kat’s older brother, Army CID in reserves, protective, caring, kind, loving brother, gentleman, strong, lethal, attracted to Maddie
* Bravo: retired military K-9, German Shepherd, came home with Nate, protective hero there to help throughout the book
* Grandmother: recently deceased, took Kat and Nate in when their parents died, excellent role model, loving, kind, strong…someone to admire
* Mr. and Mrs. Kincaid: grandmother’s neighbors, close as family, good people
* Simon Kinsey: Detective, professional, intelligent, feels something for Maddie, protective, good at what he does, wonder if he will star in book seven
* The look into social work and how emotionally draining it must be
* The plot, pacing, setting, and writing
* The twists, turns, tension, and surprises
* That I was invested in the story and cared about the outcome
* That the bad guys were all caught, and no loose strings were left hanging
What I didn’t like:
* Who and what I was meant not to like
* Thinking about the situations social workers encounter
* Thinking about what Maddie’s life in foster care probably was like
Did I like this book? Yes
Would I read more in this series/by this author? Definitely
Thank you to the author for the ARC – This is my honest review.
5 Stars
BLURB
5-year-old runaway Kat Anderson witnesses a gruesome murder. Social worker Maddi O’Hara is called in to provide emergency housing for the flight risk teen. While Maddi works to reunite Kat and her brother, Nathaniel, it becomes clear the man the police are looking for is hunting Kat. As the danger escalates, Nate finds himself falling in love with the woman protecting his little sister. Tragedy and betrayal are everywhere. Does Maddi have the courage to accept the chance at the family she’s being offered? Or will a murderer make the decision for her?
#Rebecca Flade#Philly Heat 6#Tirgearr Publishing#Romance#Romantic Suspense#Fiction#Contemporary Romance#Philadelphia#Murder#Foster System#Crime#Family
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logging back in after months of disappearing to beg for resources about the foster system in general but especially how being queer within the system effects it all. google is going to shit and i can't find anything at all
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When I was very young, all I wanted was to perform music on a stage. I shied away from that dream after a few years past foster hell. I felt all over again how they had made a blatant mockery of me, with what I was struggling with. They only saw a wild child, and did their best to crush me. Afterwards, Nanny absolutely made it worse, even though she claimed to love me (I'm honestly still unpacking this mess).
When my parents helped me realize what being a famous musician would mean besides the art form, I was afraid. Terrified of the potential scrutiny that would come from it. So I ended up just putting that dream away. Writing stories would become my primary outlet after that, because something had to take its place. Later, I'd also develop my skills at drawing. I'm an artist, it's in my genes. I wouldn't stop singing and otherwise making music as I could, of course. It just wasn't anything other than keeping myself grounded at some level, reminding me that other people do feel the same kinds of things as me.
The whole thing is, that original dream still hung on like an aloe plant for decades. I might try to ignore it, but it would never really die. It survived on the dregs of my other art. And I've been realizing this week just how easy it could actually be, for me, to make my poetry into song.
There's a video on Instagram of me reciting one of my poems written last month. I have this cadence, apparently, that people really like. But I have it very much because of music. Dad is also an entertainer by nature, with theatre and the carnivals as a young man, and even now is still entertaining almost anyone he has a conversation with. The rest is from various YouTubers I follow, some who read stories for their channels, and quite a number of science/history/plus communicators and educators.
Yes, I've been thinking of reading more of my poetry and posting on Instagram and such. But the thing with the video I did share, is that I was so focused on my poem and setting the desired tone of the event I was at, I didn't think about anyone recording it at all. I guess I should have realized it was bound to be recorded. But it was me not even thinking about being recorded that helped me speak without getting too nervous as well as I did. So the idea that I know I'm being recorded, because I chose it in the first place, is a lot more nerve-wracking.
It's not that I'm afraid I can't do it, since speaking to any kind of audience is getting a little easier each day. It's the trauma and baggage I've been carrying my entire life. It's that whole thinking it's better to stick to the shadows and background. But the truth is, I've always been very visible in life. And frankly, it was often against my will to begin with. So choosing to embrace that visibility is a lot scarier than just having it thrust onto me by someone else.
The most frustrating part about this is the fact that doing it is inevitable. I just struggle with the video format because it seems to mean showing my messy-looking face. I've been subjected to so much judgement over how the nerves literally don't even all work right to begin with. How I had no impulse control, when the truth was I just never had the time to develop it. It's kind of why I abandoned my tiktok account years ago, along with some general platform type concerns (and it's not even the political crap).
Yes, I've thought of going back and doing stuff. But my physical appearance makes me nervous about it, since people are still so judgemental. This may also be inevitable, though. I'm in the middle of reclaiming myself, and the decision to embrace my physical visibility has already been carved in stone.
Being entirely honest, I don't quite know where this will end up leading me. I'm walking into the wide unknown with only my lantern to guide me through the shadows. And even though it seems like I have no path to even follow, or even a clear destination, every step farther lands on solid ground. My path unfolds with each step I take, even if I'm only stepping onto thin air.
A snowball's chance in Hell is all I need.
-Sterling 🎉😺
#dream big#music#music artists#poetry#stories#creative writing#art forms#artist#foster hell#foster system#trauma#child abuse#ptsd#severe anxiety#anxiety and panic#trigeminal neuralgia#trigeminalneuralgia#nerve pain#congenital#social media#personal shit#vent#vent post
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Abby Jimenez | Just for the Summer
The Book: Part of Your World by Abby JimenezPublished: April 2, 2024 by ForeverDate read: February 13, 2024 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Rating: 5 out of 5. The Characters: Emma and Justin Buy it on Bookshop.org | Amazon This page contains affiliate links. I may earn a small commission from qualifying purchases made through links on this site. This was a Book of the Month! If you’ve been thinking of joining…
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