#FRIED** god you can see it
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IT'S DONE IT'S DONE IT'S DONE
in google docs since this ended up being almost 4.5k words and i knew that would be HORRIBLE to read on tumblr. if you see the typo in my gmail address don't worry about it i made this account when i was 10
i hope you guys like what I've been cooking... may be a bit ooc but i tried to stay as canon compliant as possible or at least explain myself and my rationale where i could so i hope it's not too jarring
#larry time#ocs#kiru#ask to tag#<- i cover some sensitive topics in this one but they're mentioned quite briefly so im not sure what i Should tag it as...#it's also almost midnight and ive been at this for days now so my brains a little tired#FRIED** god you can see it#anyways i kept my promise 🫡 it's still technically 'tomorrow' from yesterday
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also just for the record. no matter how much utterly stupid shit i say or draw about him, frank actually makes me so deeply sad. this old man should be picking up his grandkids but he cant. i think about him too much and im so sad
#marvel#frank castle#the punisher#this is true for like most of these guys [gestures vaguely to comicbook men] but frank is the one that makes me want to chew on rocks rn. s#like yeah i selfship with him for fun and i like to think about cutesy or funny stuff involving him but the reality is he makes me so sad#ig thats part of why i do it. you make me so sad old man. but youre not real so in some version of not real you can be a little better#not happy but yk better#but like. just. fuck man hes so deeply damaged and hurt it drives me up the wall. my hurt person hurting people#as always i struggle to string words together this isnt news if you know anything about him you know exactly what im getting at#he would have been a wonderful father and husband. the way hes so devoted to them still. always. its killing me#sometimes i see canon moments of him where how just fundamentally deeply broken as a person he is and augh#nothing can help you nothing can make things any better but my god you cannot be left alone in this state#eh maybe thats it. i cant help him i cant make him feel better. but i cant let him be alone like this#i dont think he should have to be alone like this#bleh sorry word vomit. im tired and sleepy. i wrote 4 essays this week. need to write 2 more. going a little bonkers#brain is fried.
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I'M SO DONE WITH EXAMS HELL YEAHHHHHHHHH
Hi I miss y'all how have you been :3
#GOD#SHAKING THE SKY RIGHT NOW#I AM SO FREE I CAN FINALLY OFFICIALLY GRADUATE AND BE ON HOLIDAY#OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#high fiving every single one of you who sees this#chris p fried what?!
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"i feel like luffy knows right from the start who to fight." chopper gets it! the rest of the crew is waiting for him out on the bridge because they know this isn't their fight and all they can do is wait for their captain. the marines can't believe that this tiny group of pirates wiped out cp9 because this straw hat was a rookie, and the rest of the crew shouts out to him that they made it to the bridge, they got robin, and all he has left to do is kick lucci's ass and they can leave. and luffy smiles.
#the marines: WE HAVE IDENTIFIED PIRATE HUNTER ZORO AND NICO ROBIN#... and NO ONE ELSE#god zoro the reputation you have that your name is known throughout the east blue and across the grand line#(yes i know he got his first bounty poster after they crossed BUT THE POINT BEING his name is KNOWN by many and was early on/first)#luffy picking a fight with the 'big bad' can easily be written off as 'oh he's just picking fights with the biggest guy' which yes but no#picking fights is more than just throwing a punch at the first person he sees#and it's been well established from jaya that you need to be able to gauge which fights are worth it#(luffy's fight with bellamy is actually one of my current favorites because it's him yammering and then just one punch)#and i think luffy's logic is a mix of things! one being that this guy has it coming because he had a major hand in robin's plight here#and other that he's the captain so is it not his job to look after his crew? take on the fights they shouldn't have to?#it's very important that each straw hat (and pirates as a whole but esp this crew because they're small) can pull their own weight#but you know luffy won't be pulling any of his punches#does any of this make sense my brain is fried#kate watches op#enies lobby#this was a post about chopper lmao
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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...
#AND then they'll be the winning team or whatever and its like... wow... imagine that... I wonder how its possible that they can get#more dishes out faster than the other teams... hrrmm.... lol#Not that they aren't still doing work like. obviously it's still hard and there's still a sales component and other stuff to be done#but It's just kind of unbalanced seeming when one group is serving like grilled shrimp sandwich with 3 homemade sauces and a#slaw and two sides and the other people are like... slicing fruit and drizzling a bottle of hersheys chocolate syrup on top of some thing#they just threw in a waffle maker for a few minutes#You see the footage of the teams cooking and everyone is like prepping a ton of different things and meat and vegetables and they have#boiling pots and pans and fryers going and tossing stuff in bowls and compiling these multi component dishes#and then That One Team is always just casually slicing bananas or doing some whipped cream in a bowl gbjhbhj#They usually dont even make their own caramel or chocolate sauces or anything. Nutella out of a jar babey!#So all you're really Making is like... whipped cream. and some sort of batter (waffle. crepe. etc)#If I got placed in a competition like that and I found out one of my opponents just sold waffles or pancake sticks or etc#like that I would just be like... okay.. I'm out then. bye. OR I would pivot and be like.. right I shall remove all complexity from my menu#whatsoever and just start selling plain balls of fried dough with powdered sugar or plain fries with nothing on them or something lol#update: OH my god.. one of these teams on a newer season is selling a 'bonus add on' where you can add#cinnamon sugar and caramel syrup (possibly not even home made by them???? just from a bottle) for $5 extra on your order#If I bought a $12 waffle from a food truck and they were like 'hey do you want to upgrade? for only $5 we'll drizzle a teaspoon#of caramel and sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on there!' I feel like I would cancel my order and walk away.#that is a $1 add on at MOST.. for a freaking DRIZZLE of caramel sauce LOL#and of course this team is in the top 3... squirrel.... come ON...#Which I know all these shows are fake and bad and whatever. I dont watch them seriously. I think I liked the first few seasons#but then anything past like season 4 (or whenever they started having established people who already ran food trucks on there#instead of taking a bunch of peope who had never run a food truck before and giving them one - which is a much more equal footing#premise to me) I have just been increasingly annoyed at and I really just have the show on for background noise#whilst doing chores or something and am not genuinely paying that much attention but... my god.. At least try to pretend its fair lol#WHICH I KNOWW... you can say 'well the other teams could do similar if they wanted.' or blah blah. tehcnically it's THEIR choice to#make stuff from scratch and not sell a bunch of packaged frozen chicken wings dropped into a fryer over a shitty 6min waffle or etc.#but... I will never respect a $5 for 1tbsp of caramel sauce type of situation.. even if they win.. you will always be losers in my heart#So many teams with real cooking skill & good concepts go home to the 'slap nutella on fried dough' people... how...
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auuggghg wauughh im dying from a deadly diseas. its called ate pizza and macdonalds and soy all in one day disease an d symptoms include exploding. u mgiht want to step back brother
#figjting for my life on the toilet rn you have no idea#it seemed like such a good idea. it seemed like such a good idea.#the pizza. that was like 12 hours ago at this point. and you know i could feel it but i was ok. you know.#same goes for macdonalds. ok sure mcflurry and nuggets and a few fries floatin around in there for like 8 hrs. but it was fine. i was fine.#i get home just before 11pm right. sleepy guy. nap on the couch for an hour. i should have gone to bed. but no.#my hubris. my desire for prawn fried rice. i simply had to have it.#looking back i can see how the universe tried to stop me. no onions. no sesame oil. but i pushed on. i was determined.#i have onion powder. i have peanut oil. you cannot stop me. the battle cry has sounded. the war has begun.#whisk and cook the egg. chop chop chop the bacon and fry with the prawn and garlic. add spices. veggies. and of course rice#add the substitute peanut oil. a... generous amount of oyster sauce. its good. and of course how could we forget the soy sauce#ha. ha ha ha. hahahaahaha. ha. god.#glug glug glug. tipping the nearly-empty bottle of costco soy sauce upside-down into the wok. hissssss#mix mix mix. taste test. adjust a little. shame about the onion but otherwise good. cant wait to eat a bowl.#scoop scoop scoop. fried rice in a bowl. sit and play some turf war while it cools. eat eat eat. listen to sci guys podcast. life is good.#perhaps it would have been fine if it had ended here. my decisions would not have been without consequence but they would be bearable.#it did not end there.#another bowl. another mistake. ingesting more and more soy. gorging myself upon the garden of eden. wrath was fast approaching#i dont know if i really need to explain this next part. to be honest. i think you can probably guess. the pain. the shartblasting. you know#anyway it took me so long to write these tags that im actually mostly fine now and in bed with a kitty so life is good#tomorrow i will eat even more fried rice and maybe even buy that one chocolate soy milk even though it kills me but it tastes sooo good#i will never learn my lesson ever amen#mine#wow long tags. hiiiii if u read all this
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Context: Gus Fring is basically what people think Mine is like. In the Breaking Bad Prequel, he's revealed to be gay, so thank god for that, but aside from that, Fring is focused 100% on efficiency, product, logic, etc. and his Gincarlo Esposito conveys this perfectly
Translation: If movie majima was more bonkers than in Canon, Movie Mine should have a colder machine-like demeanor than he ususally does in canon
(Also how could you not watch Breaking Bad uncultured pleb)
no i got what you were saying dont worry i understood thats just a whole lotta names i gotta read
AND LEAVE ME ALONE I HAVE THE ATTENTION SPAN OF A FRUIT FLY I CAN'T WATCH 62 EPISODESSS
#snap chats#'i cant watch 62 episodes' fucking LIAR i watched all of jojo parts 1-4 yes i fuckin could#also 'he's revealed to be gay so thank god for that' bro thats makin me laugh PLEASELKAJE#but also i mean saying mine's cold and machine like isn't TOTALLY off the mark. he is Very Efficient and logical#for the most part.#so fair nuff#i hope if mine comes back in the franchise the next time we see him he's sellin chicken#mine onea them bitches to eat fried chicken during christmas cause he heard the west did it i promise#i cant talk shit though when i was growing up my dad would buy fried chicken SO muchJFLAKJAJK#whenever id visit him and there'd be a family meetin with his extended family Guranteed kfc was there#oh i miss it... not so much the chicken thats OILY but i miss the family...#'snap can you go five minutes without talking about your lonely ass' NO!!! I CANT !!!! i wish i had an actual family :(#yk what else i wish i wish i had more fuckin chocolate-covered strawberries I Accidentally Ate All Of Them#complainin bout the oil content in fried chicken yet ill sit here and eat a whole bag of Chocolate Covered Fruit motherfucker the SUGAR#ok im shutting up now bye i have work
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So this is my thing now, I’m afraid to go to sleep. This is kinda bullshit, brain.
#I feel like I’m going to die when I fall asleep#see… I’m afraid you think I just mean I’m scared of death#no no no. no. I feel like I’m suffocating. I have to force myself to breathe. my body tingles (in a bad way). I get really overheated.#I get dizzy and feel like I’m going to pass out from lack of air. I feel sick.#I haven’t slept much lately.#I’m miserable alllll the time. I can maybe force sleep with super exhaustion but I’m drained no matter what#this isn’t the first time it’s happened but this is the longest it’s gone on#from that my anxiety is now blanketing everything bc I’m so tired and scared about not getting to sleep#sickening anxiety. I feel like puking or passing out. and I got hit with some heavy (but thankfully short) virtigo yesterday#terrible terrible terrible#and seriously. anxiety. so bad. I’m constantly trying to get high right now to fight it but it’s rough#getting high is starting to make me feel sick too. and my tolerance is building. it’s like… it’s all bad. all options.#I hate this.#AND it’s the weekend and my new primary can’t see me until Wednesday and then I’ve got to beg for… I dunno… the good stuff#god. I told myself I’d go see my doctor about this a couple of weeks ago when this last hit and I didn’t 😓#ideal scenario: all doctors fall in love with me and medically induce a short coma for me to catch up on sleep and then they give me drugs#this new doctor doesn’t know me! I haven’t laid enough groundwork! how am I supposed to beg for klonopin if we have no banter!?#that wasn’t a joke. I mean it was but it’s also serious. I need some GOOD anti-anxieties and he doesn’t know me enough to know I NEEDS IT😬#also my tinnitus is just… no sleep + stress means it gets stronger and it’s… a fucking wet willy shoved through my ear into my skull#and if I hit a bad patch of virtigo… I will… redacted.#I won’t! I will go running crying and screaming in the street before I off myself.#HEY! my insurance says I can get 30 days in-patient and I always keep that thought in my bad pocket.#*back pocket. I’m not about to go back and start redoing tags because of a few misspellings#this is so rambly#my brain is fried! I’m tired! my appetite is fucked! I don’t want to do ANYTHING!#I mean… I never want to do anything. I love being lazy. I should say that right now I CAN’T do anything. but I can. but it’s… a lot. fuck 😔#this must sound so whiny. I’m sorry. I’m sure I’ll be making more posts like this until this goes away#you can ignore this#text
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It's gotta be normal, surely, to want to draw a character, but look at their face & think "I want to inspect this fella, I want to put my hands all over & get a good look at this chap from more angles than there are individual fucking specks of sand on every beach out there, I want to measure out all their details & how all the bits of their bod's particular build will squash in this pose & stretch in this other, I want to study this fucker" right chat?
#My foolish ass listened to a fujo vtuber yap about some dumb shit like hours before the game they meant to play & my takeaway-#from her talking of some weird tv show she watched where one picks a date from one of a few guys based only on the lower half of their body#was smutty thoughts about some nerd maybe doctor who flusters easy inspecting someone who's nude & flirting them HARD like IMMACULATE rizz-#like god dam! Fella's full red stuttering & stammering all 'd-did you know um- your uh- th-this is the big-ggest I've ever- um seen!?' &-#the one on the table's like 'oh my~ set a new record have I? oh goody!~ do I win you as my prize?~<3' & this poindexter with fogged glasses#just fucking fries like you can see the steam coming off they sweating big time their face looks like a tomato they're struggling!#okay I've. it appears I've gotten off track. anyways I want my hands on some characters#for reasons weird enough to make lust look like the normal people option methinks
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Finally got the ending to the letter I was going for and uh
#the klock keeps ticking#the letter#my godddddd#my brain is fried i am shaking#I have all this analysis i wanna do but i wont do it all rn cuz damn im tired#and drained cuz like as you can expect in the route where nothing is happy and everyone dies. it was very heavy and not uplifting akdnsk#plus this is also the route where luke is his most evil and i had to stop every sentence just to take a deep breath lol#GOD he sucks i hate him so much like every time you think he cant get worse he does#but i will point out one analysis im losing my shit over and its the parallels between past and present#cuz when you get to see all the memory fragments play at once you see just how similar it all is#and basically its clear that charlotte is definitely a parallel to luke thats why she sucks so much too lol#and eduard is hannah and id figured as much like hannah and charlotte look identical and share a VA#but hannah is actually like. nice. and not a major dickhead lol#but the parallel i never noticed was the fact that takako is definitely zach#id figured she was marianne maybe just cuz they look kinda similar and both have black cats and while there is a definite parallel there#like shes definitely zach they have very similar personalities and takako has a bit of a crush on eduard#like zach with hannah but you know they both keep a safe distance cuz their crush is married and its just not their place to do this#charlotte notices this and is more possessive of eduard like luke does with hannah#and where it really comes into play in this route is luke killing hannah for disloyalty#even though HES the disloyal one and zach catches him in the act and luke takes advantage of this#and pins the crime on zach with glee because hes a racist fuck and resents Zach for ‘tempting’ hannah into cheating#something that doesnt even happen at all#its just like when charlotte kills eduard right in front of takako cuz she KNOWS she likes him and wants to punish him even though she#loves him at the same time and then she pins it on takako and has her burnt alive and shes super happy about it#cuz shes also a racist fuck and gets pleasure for making someone ‘lesser’ than her suffer and know their place#both charlotte and luke easily get away with their bullshit too cuz theyre rich white and powerful and people are way too eager to punish a#minority so they just go along with it#im so fucking aaaaaa. god im so not normal about the zach/takako parallel god i love it so much#and in particular i desperately need a scenario where zach haunts luke until he kills himself its all i ask#i suppose with the ending i got you could easily interpret that happening but still i need to see it
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I really wanna discuss Ryan/Professor with someone, but the problem is that people barely know of this ship 'cause the show isn't meant for shipping, and if they do, they either hate it, ship it only as a joke or are wildly horny over it like.
I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who interprets this ship the way I do, and it sucks 'cause gAH I WANNA TALK ABOUT IT but the chance of someone hearing me out is so low, if anyone wants to hear me out, please let me know 💀🙏🏽
#swinging a bat at a hornet's nest#begging on my hands and knees can someone please hear me out#I understand if you despise the ship 'cause ngl I don't exactly like it like shippers usually like it#but if you engage with it in a certain way it can make for a very compelling character analysis#I did not write 10k words about this ship and rant to my friend (who dOESN'T EVEN WATCH THIS SHOW) just for me to hide all of thay#y'all will see my vision and y'all will get me. just. let me speak 👁👁🙏🏽#god i'm opening myself up for bat swinging hornets by tagging this but i just need-#puppet history#the professor#ryan bergara#chris p fried what?!
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Am I making you feel sick?
Charlie Mayhew x fem reader one shot.
When Father Charlie Mayhew sees you, a magnetic young woman who isn’t the typical Catholic, his sinful nature only grows.
Thank you so much to @cxrrodedcoffin for helping me brain storm and to @xxbimbobunnyxx for helping me with the picture!
Warnings! Perv! Charlie. Panty stealing, male masturbation, self whipping, obsessive behavior, mild talks of violence, blasphemy, male receiving oral, choking, pussy slapping, degrading, spitting, female recieving oral, unprotected sex, face slapping, overstimulation, multiple orgasms!
The markings on Charlie’s back were a humbling reminder of his sin. He focused his efforts onto appearing normal. A regular service. A way to give the people encouragement, guidance and a spiritual feast. But keeping his composure while you played with the fringes of your skirt, the curves of your thighs exposed as you crossed your ankles. That proved to be a significant challenge.
You were a regular member of the church. Your attendance isolated. Your presence came after the death of your grandparents a few months prior.
He remembered first seeing you. As if a halo shined above your head as you confidently strode into the building. The click of your platform shoes echoed across the floor as you plopped onto a seat. Charlie nearly stumbled over his sermon when you met eyes that day. Your gaze was focused. Made up eyes with a mixture of curiosity and rebellion.
Above your heart, you wore a silver cross. The muscles in your neck flexing as you chew a piece of bubble gum. Beautiful wasn’t fitting enough to describe you. Charlie was enchanted by the way you tried to follow along in your Bible but you seemed to be a step behind.
His cock started to throb when you would separate your legs, exposing the black lace material that covered your pussy. After the third time he saw you, Charlie approached you with a confident stride. He hoped it was enough to cover the urge to wince at his wounds. It’s what he deserved after his fist jerked himself off the previous nights.
He readied himself to speak but you looked him up and down with a slight smirk.
“Yeah?” You ran the tip of your tongue along the edges of your teeth and Charlie cleared his throat.
“God looks favorably on those who are devout to him. And I know he looks down on you with deep appreciation.” He was used to his charm working immediately. Charlie prepared for flirtation in return, a giggle or even batting eyelashes but instead you snorted with a flick of your hair.
“Duh. That’s why I come here. I know God loves me otherwise I wouldn’t be alive.” He opened his mouth to question what you meant but you spun on your heels and walked away.
Charlie was self admittedly obsessed with you. He found every excuse imaginable to walk by your area. He found you online. His fingers shook and his forearm was sore from busting a load when he looked at your photos.
But his deep desire for you only grew when he ran into you at the diner. You drank a milkshake and nibbled on the remainder of your fries. When you saw him, you waved him over. Charlie plastered on a smile and spoke your name with a feign politeness.
“Can you be a good little priest and watch my purse?” You asked him and he swallowed. He nodded as you walked to the near restroom.
Charlie understood fully it was juvenile to search your purse but when his fingers fell on the material of lace, an overwhelming feeling of excitement came. He pocketed the pair of panties and gained his strength when you returned.
His life before turning to the cloth consisted of perverse acts and they lingered within him like a poison. You were possessing his every thought just like corrupted angels that turned away from God. Charlie was tired of his own rough hand. One that inflicted regular discipline. One that desperately wanted to touch you.
He walked around the church during nightfall. Kneeling before the candles and begging for any assistance. For strength to resist. But it was too much. So much so, that Father Charlie began stealing more and more things. A lipgloss tube. Chains. A secondary fragrance. Anything that could bring him closer to you.
Charlie concluded and pried himself out of the intoxication of the image of being between your legs.
“Take solace in the congregation!” He cried out, holding his hands up. “Lean onto God for your salvation against this treachery!” Charlie quieted.
The service concluded and the rainfall began. Numbers dwindled except you. His breathing trembled as he strode to you. “Ah, is your mind filled with worry?” He tucked his hands behind his back. You popped your hip and stared at the wood intricacies.
“I can’t go home. There was a leak in my apartment ceiling. I’m about to phone a friend so I can stay with him while it’s being fixed.” You adjusted your ring and Charlie clenched his fists.
The mention of another male made him feel nearly nauseous. Charlie clicked his jaw and raised his eyebrows. “You can have sanctuary here. We have rooms-“
“God, why do you talk like that?” You turned to face him and he was taken aback by your aggressive tone. “You’re my age. And you act like you’re Jesus!”
You gripped his collar suddenly and Charlie let out a gasp. Your breath smelled like strawberries. The shine to your lips with a hint of glitter. “Get over yourself, Father. Just because you wear this ridiculous outfit, doesn’t mean you’re anything less than a little boy.”
Every word you spoke was laced with a condescending bite. You let him go but Charlie didn’t step back. His eyes kept falling to the wicked mouth giving him a slew of insults that were a muffle in his ears.
“Anyway. I keep trying to call him but there’s barely any service in here.” You roll your eyes and Charlie musters his confidence back.
“You can stay here tonight. Give him a call in the morning. I can promise you safety here.” His voice was barely above a whisper. You seemed to contemplate it for a moment. Your stare narrowed before a minimal softness came.
“Well. I guess I can spare one night.”
Charlie led you in silence to his room. Every footstep was heavy. The weight of his internal battle tormenting him. He stood in silence as your fingers traced the walls, lingering on the hung cross and twirled the quilt on his bed.
You sat down, resting your palms on your knees and met his look.
“How long have you been catholic?” The question was genuine and his intrigue increased as you chuckled. You examined your nails with a lilting response.
“Not long. Grew up around the church but left when I was eighteen. Swore it off until these super hot guys in a band attacked me,” His jaw dropped and rage ignited his chest. “But I happened to have my Cross. Guess you could call it Divine intervention. I stabbed the man with it in the eye. Maced the other one. Third dude ran away.”
You completed the sentence with a giggle. “I promised God that if he got me out, I’d join the church. And I keep my word.” You pressed your hands together in prayer.
Charlie lost control of his body and he moved towards you. He set his large hands on your shoulders, squeezing your muscles and he bent down. “How could anyone want to hurt you?”
“I’m still here, aren’t I?” He pressed a finger against your lips and you pulled it into your mouth. Charlie grunted and removed it.
You sank down on the floor, unbuckling his pants with a practiced ease. Peering at him, you smiled and hooked your finger in his trousers.
His size and girth made your mouth water. You allowed your lips to part, drool pooling down your tongue that stuck out. You removed his boxers, Charlie’s dick twitching as you slapped the tip against your tongue. You licked his length, dragging motions that made his vision go white.
When you took him in your mouth, moving your neck to deepthroat, he moaned and his hand set on your head. Charlie pumped your skull, thrusting but you pulled off. Messily sucking his balls and he started convulsing.
No. No, no, no. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. He pulled the strings. He held the reins and control was his.
A part of him unlocked, one that he tried to put away. Charlie growled and yanked you off his shaft. Laughter escaped you, as you still believed you called the shots.
“Oh my god! You were about to cream down my throat and I only did it for a minute or two.” He stood there as you dug the pair of stolen panties from his pocket.
“Did you really think I was that stupid? You think I don’t know a fucking pervert when I see them?” You flicked them at his face and Charlie’s cheeks heated. “You’re disgusting.”
He reached and gripped your jaw. Charlie backed you up until you were slammed on the bed, his knee between your thighs as his cock pulsed. He wrapped that same hand around your throat, squeezing until you were staring at him with wide eyes.
“I am going to ruin you and that sweet little pussy you flash at me. You think this is a goddamn joke?” His voice was rasped with lust and a sickness he caught the moment he saw you.
Charlie let go of your throat and watched you cough. He tore away your panties, shredding off the skirt and stared at your dripping cunt. He let his head fall to the side, dark brown eyes focused on your flustered expression.
You went to gain some sort of momentum to support yourself but Charlie gave your pussy a sharp slap.
You made a shrieking noise at the impact and he scoffed. “Oh don’t act so fuckin stupid. Is that little corrupted brain of yours not getting it?” Weeks of build up poured out of him and he smacked your center three more times. Each strike harder than the last.
Your mouth pressed in a line, a poor attempt to conceal the pleasure. Charlie allowed a sinister smile to curl. “You’re almost as fucked up as I am, doll.” Your eyes widened as he slowly let his mouth graze your lower half.
He let his full lips brush against your bare skin as he breathed in. Charlie smelled the scent of your pulsing cunt and the wild need ignited in him. The priest gripped your hips as his knees pressed into the floor. He smashed his mouth against your pussy.
It was better than candy. The most saccharine sensation as he parted his lips and found your clit. Charlie’s dick was so hard that his hand picked up the discarded panties. He wrapped them around his cock, moaning at the relief as his tongue tasted you.
Charlie worked you over, his other hand keeping your hips in place.
His nose hit the right spots and he wasn’t shy about being messy. You were panting, holding his head and grinding as much as you could. Your moans were better than his favorite song. Charlie had plenty of experience burying his face between a woman’s legs. It was something that he did not only for their pleasure but his own.
Feeling your body contract, moving into his corrupted touch made Charlie’s eyes roll back as more slick soaked his mouth. You cried out, a series of, “Oh god, fuck! F-fuck.” You sounded on the brink of tears.
Charlie pushed two fingers inside you, making your whimpers become pathetic. He pumped them as he lifted himself, hovering over you with a wet chin. “Open that whore mouth,” he commanded and you did.
Charlie let the spit fall, coating your tongue and lips. “Swallow it. You know all about that, huh?” He enjoyed the sight of you beneath him. Charlie kissed you. Deeply and hungrily. He sucked your lower lip lewdly, letting a thick groan escape him. You returned it in kind, pressing your chest against his, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it off his arms.
Your fingers felt the scars on his back but Charlie didn’t care. Every single self inflicted mark was worth it if it meant he could be with you.
“Fuck me, please. Please fuck me,” You begged and Charlie’s dick fucking hurt but he loved the pain. He ran the tip of his cock against your clit, smearing the cum and continuous wetness.
He sank into your entrance, stretching you and you both let out a harmonious sigh. Charlie’s half opened eyes observed you arch your back but that familiar fire burned in your eyes. You tightened your legs that were around his waist. He knew you were trying to flip over. Not now. Charlie aggressively thrusted into you, bringing his hand down to spank the side of your ass.
“Oh no, you don’t get to ride me yet. You’re gonna lay there like the helpless sinner you are.” He growled and heaved your thighs over his shoulders. Getting an even deeper angle as your ass was off the mattress.
Drool escaped your hung open mouth and he let his palm feel your lower stomach. “Yeah? You feel that? Feel me in your pathetic pussy? You,” Thrust,” “Are,” thrust, “Mine.”
“Yours,” You sobbed and he smacked your face.
“You can do better. You can do fucking better than that.” Charlie smeared the spit on your mouth, cheek and slapped it again. “Tell me you’re a good girl.”
“I’m a good girl. I’m your good girl.” You pleaded with growing pleasure.
“See? You obey me. Deep down,” He felt the bulge again. “You’re a desperate little girl needing to be fucked. By someone as sick as me.”
You let out a wail, moans of pleasure coming out in staccato breaths. Charlie busted his load into your pussy, his lips hovering over yours as you both humped each other.
He rolled over, sinking you on his cock. Your tits were in his face, he sucked your nipple as you bounced. Charlie felt your fingers scratch his chest, marking his skin in the shape of a Cross with your nail.
He pried off your tit, his hands holding your waist. “Pussy squeezin me so tight. Like you can’t get enough. Greed is a sin,” Charlie sucked your pulse point and brought you to a second climax.
You fucked yourself on his dick. Mewling as he coated your insides with cum. “You’re my dirty little sinner. Give me every last drop. Let me have it,” He whispered the last part of the sentence.
He didn’t forget your tale of woe. Charlie put away your confession in his mind. You were put in a position of self defense. But if you hadn’t been so brave, you wouldn’t have walked into the congregation.
You slowed down, lazily riding his dick with a dazed expression.
“Get on your knees. You’re gonna lick my cock clean and finish the game you started.”
Dividers by @cafekitsune
Tagging @xxbimbobunnyxx @cxrrodedcoffin @fear-is-truth @starkeysprincess @cameronsprincess @chavezprincess @titsout4nicholas @userchai @taintandviolent @webbluvrsugar @oceanblvd111
#Charlie#charlie mayhew#father charlie mayhew#father charlie x reader#father charlie smut#father charlie grotesquerie#charlie mayhew x reader#charlie mayhew x y/n#charlie mayhew smut#nicholas alexander chavez#Nicholas Alexander Chavez smut#nicholas chavez#Nicholas Chavez smut#grotesquerie
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"5 Tips for Dating a Werewolf" by TJ Klune
1. If a werewolf has locked onto your scent, it is best to let them get as much of it as they can. If they are in shifted form, it might mean a wet nose to your face or a tongue in your hair. Fear not! They are, in a way, like a large dog, if a large dog were capable of human wants and whims. If you find yourself in such a position, do not move! Let the werewolf finish its scent-marking. It could take anywhere from five minutes to six days, so get comfortable!
2. Should you find yourself in possession of a dead animal left upon your doorstep, don’t scream and/or vomit! Chances are, it is from the same werewolf who sniffed you, wanting to make sure you are provided for. This is how a lycanthrope expresses interest. Be careful not to offend the wolf, as they might be watching from behind a tree or a bush. If you are averse to blood and gore, pretend someone dropped a cherry pie filled with bones on your porch.
(On the off chance that the dead animal was left by a cult and not a werewolf, please be prepared in case you are marked for a ritual sacrifice.)
3. Going on a date with a werewolf can be a fun event! Given that you might be in public, it would be best not to ask your werewolf suitor to “shift in the middle of an Applebee’s just to see if it scares the server into giving free appetizers.” While many people enjoy mozzarella sticks (especially when given under threat of fangs), using your werewolf in such a way to get fried cheese is considered bad form. Your werewolf has feelings, and no one likes to be used.
(If your werewolf does shift to get you cheese, reward them by telling them you think they are the greatest creature in existence. Positive reinforcement goes a long way!)
4. Uh oh. Your werewolf has driven you home, arches a single, devastating eyebrow, and says, “Are you going to invite me inside?”
Remember, werewolves aren’t vampires, meaning they do not need permission to enter your residence. However, good wolves always wait for permission before entering a dwelling that is not their own.
In this case, given the arched eyebrow, the werewolf is hoping to be invited inside for “adult activities.” This might include rolling on the carpet or having sex in the kitchen and/or up against a wall. If you choose to do this, you might see the werewolf’s eyes flashing. Good news! This means the wolf is having a wonderful time.
5. Your wolf stayed the night! How lucky are you? If you wake up the next morning with the shifter lying on top of you, it is very important that you do not move until they have decided to move on their own. Waking up a sleeping wolf can sometimes be difficult work, but if you keep a squeaky ball next to your bed, now is the time to put it to good use. Squeeze it near the wolf’s ear and ask, “Who’s a good boy? Who wants to play with the ball? Is it you? Is it you?” Your wolf will most likely glower at you and threaten your life, but if you squeeze the ball three times, the wolf will be distracted. Throw it to the floor, and as the wolf chases after it, consider making waffles! Werewolves love waffles.
(God help you if you make pancakes. You have been warned.)
If you have survived these first five steps, you are to be commended! That means you most likely will have a werewolf for the rest of your life. A werewolf is a commitment. Adopt, don’t shop!
#tj klune#wolfsong#ravensong#green creek#werewolf#werewolves#fantasy romance#death of an animal#booklr
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Beekeeping age [Dilf!Konig x fem!Reader]
You're ex-boyfriend is an asshole, so you decided to fuck his hot military dad instead. You're going to find out why his first wife ran as fast as she did, very soon - but Konig is still the best dick that ever happened to you.
CW: Daddy kink(obvi), power imbalance, possessive Konig, perverted Konig, age gap(Reader in her early twenties, Konig in his early forties), mentions of cheating(your ex is a douchebag anyway), slightly obsessive Konig, size kink, unprotected sex.
FIRST PART (can be read separately) AO3
— Why your wife left you, again?
You stuff your face full of…something. He cooked it – gods did he cook it well. It’s meat and vegetables and spices, and it feels like your dad cooking but twice as good. It feels like pure sin because he says you shouldn’t worry about calorie counts or how fat the meat is, or how good everything tastes fried because he needs his special girl to feel good and healthy and fatten up a little bit, and you…gods, you’re down. Bad.
You wonder if König’s wife left because she couldn’t compete with his cooking. You wonder if his wife left because he was feeding her too good.
— Why don’t we leave uneasy questions for later, Schatzi?
He brushes his hand over your hair, taking in the way you look – dressed up in his shirt, skin covered in bites and bruises from his hold. He can’t see it right now but can almost testify to the way your lipstick was all over his collar – good thing he wasn't wearing his uniform shirt, wouldn’t want to make dorks from Kobra jealous.
He brings you another plate, he fills your glass – you never knew beer could taste this good, but he whispered something about having his own little homemade brewery for wine and beer somewhere in the mountains, in his Summer house. This man has a hug apartment in Vienna and a Summer house – you think you heard him having enough land to go hunting and to keep bees, and you might have cum a little bit just here and there.
— I would like to know the story, actually. To not repeat her mistakes, you know.
— You won’t, Liebling. I can already picture you with a ring on your pretty finger.
— Not so fast. Maybe I don’t believe in marriage.
— You’re too young to stop believing in it.
— Way to talk when you’re the divorced one, sir.
— Shut it, Schatzen. I can still take care of a good girl like you, ja? König leans in to kiss you, his lips brushing over your mouth – it’s wet and swollen, he bite you quite a few times already, and you feel dizzy just from the way his tongue lingers just a second before going in, taking your arousal even more. His hand gently brushes some hair from your face and you giggle from the sensation of his rough fingers on the softness of your skin. It never failed to mesmerize you, just how seasoned and old the colonel might be – and his hands would still tremble as if he is handling the finest porcelain doll in his hands. He has the expression of an anxious, devoted follower – you are not sure how his wife could left him. If he was looking at you like this every day, even as you go through with pregnancy and a piece of shit kid like Paul, you would die before leaving him.
— Could you two please stop fucking each other?
— I thought you wanted to move to dorms.
— This is my house too!
— Not on the documents, it’s not. — You can’t just throw me away, dad! — Your new stepmom needs her space.
König grasps your shoulder as you try to stop them from arguing again – it’s embarrassing enough that you’re fucking your ex’s dad. Colonel makes it a whole fucking show, parading you around as his controversially young girlfriend, making sure that his son will hear your moans and whimpers as you get fucked at every surface of this apartment. You were wondering if you could ask him to move to the Summer house – even with your college and all. You can take a gap year and write a journalist investigation about lonely veterans and their mastery at brewing alcohol. You can take a gap year and try your best in the new trophy wife gig. König’s hand is firm on your shoulder – you know better than to try and argue with him, the silent recognition of authority loud in your head. You sigh, trying your best to just stop yourself from acting too damn weird. It’s their male thing, and you’re just an intruder in a big T-shirt and old leggings. König said it wasn’t his wifey’s – that he burned all of her stuff when she left. Somehow, you find peace in that statement.
— How could you even…Jesus fucking Christ, this is disgusting. She is my age! — And the most beautiful girl in the world. I can see why you liked her. — She is my girlfriend! — Schatzi came to me in distress and begged me to take her. I think we both knew you weren’t…the best option. You feel more embarrassed with each second of their conversation. You don’t want to listen, you don’t want to take in their words, you feel like a trophy being discarded between two different winners. You feel like a prized mare on a farm – and they won’t even look at you. Too distracted by the sound of their voices, you eat your dinner in somewhat somber peace because you need to eat, after all, and you really like what König cooks. You like what König does most of the time. All of the time.
Paul storms off the room after a few minutes of bickering. You feel guilty for not stopping him because he was still kinda your boyfriend. You ex-boyfriend. Your asshole incel-ish ex-boyfriend whose assholless literally made you go and sleep with his dilfy dad, and…god, you feel like a whore. Good. Paul was calling you a whore a lot of the time, you may as well take the new name and plaster it in your new badge.
König’s hand lingers on your back, caressing it gently. You whimper because you feel bad and you’re still in college, and Paul’s disgusted reaction reminds you that fucking a guy in his forties isn’t the best business decision. Even if the said guy is a retired colonel with shitload of money, even if he still goes to work sometimes, just because he wants to feel cool and shoot guns at bad guys, even if this guy buys you cool gifts and he promised to renovate your car or buy you a new one, and he makes plans and takes you to places that don’t make you feel like begging for attention.
If anything, you feel like he is drowning you with attention.
His hand lets go of your shoulder – he was holding you so tight the whole conversation, you can sense the bruises forming on your skin. You lick your lips, and he moves to kiss you again. You feel like drowning, you feel like this is all just a dream – and you’re also drunk because gods, König knows how to make a good glass of…something.
— You shouldn’t act like this. He is your son.
He laughs dismissingly. He dismisses a lot of things you said – you think it’s the age difference. You think he is just being traditional, and you don’t want to be too nagging. You don’t want to end up like his wife and wake up from the dear you’ve been seeing.
König’s lips are soft, and you can look past his hands, taking you too possessively – you can close your eyes, and you can just listen to his accent, smiling as his tongue worms its way into your mouth. He is good, you think – at this whole kissing thing. At this whole “Hi there, I’m a retired old dog and I am fucking the girlfriend of my only son. I’m divorced btw” .
He has experience – you know it when he tucks your lip between his teeth, when he massages your shoulders as you spread your legs already, so wet for him, it’s almost embarrassing. You never slept much with Paul – his poor excuse of a son – it was always never enough lube, it was always never enough attention, he always needed you to shave or to leave your hair to grow a little bit, it was either your perfume being too sweet or you no wearing anything at all. You thought he would have much more fun masturbating to his anime chicks and poor gaming sessions with his friends.
But König isn’t like this – every time he drops on his knees to eat you out like a man starving, you feel utter and complete devotion. In his tongue, in his mouth, in his teeth as he sucks little marks into your thighs, making sure you will remember it tomorrow when he will ask you to stay for breakfast and then ride you to whatever you need to come next. Last time he promised to drive you to the library, he took a few turns and took you to some restaurant instead. You gushed about not having proper attire, he was still in his half-uniform and rocking dark cargo pants, and he was apologizing every time his fingers hit that special spot in your cunt as he fingered you during the second course of meals. He said that he was so, sorry about not fucking you properly, about having to resort to public displays like this – and you were too high on loving him to care. You still are. — I don’t think we should be…
— He left. Won’t bother us anymore.
— I’m not in the mood right now.
— You’re always in the mood, Schatzen. Enough to drive me crazy. — You’re a pervert. Like Paul.
— He takes on after his father, ja?
It would alarm you how much contempt he had for his own child right now. Then, again, you were the one who dumped his son for the powerhouse of a dad. Maybe it was your daddy issues, maybe it was your dumb reasoning and the summer break that you didn’t want to spend with your family. Good thing you’re spending it with the other.
König’s face is buried between your legs, his teeth tugging on the soft fabric, forcing your leggings down. God, it feels good – he is so high on wanting you, can’t even wait to take off your clothes properly. You never had a man wanting you so badly before – it’s addicting, it’s crushing, it makes you feel like a goddess among men. Makes you feel wanted, a thing that your ex never did.
You forget about guilt when he kisses your lower tummy, when his lips trace down to your cunt, taking sharp licks through your panties. You wore them this morning, something from a new lacy set he bought – one of the only ones that weren’t torn off from your body the moment you took them on. He always wanted you to make these little fashion shows for him, making good use of his money – you weren’t a sugar baby, not on paper, you still clutched to the last traces of your dignity, but he did buy you a lot of gifts.
— S’ pretty for me, Liebling. The prettiest girl in the world.
— I assume after…af..ter your wife.
You giggle when he frowns, his rugged face filled with concern. He doesn’t like jokes about his marriage – you don’t want to ask him about it because it would mean waking up from a dream you want to experience over and over again, but you heard what Paul was talking about. What his mom told him about. you heard enough to know that kissing a man like König is a safety hazard and a liability that you can’t afford, but it’s warm, and he is rich, and you don’t want to go back to your part-time job this season. You want to be dumb and you want to be young – right now, you’re doing both. — Don’t be so dumb, Schatzi. Although it suits you.
— I’m not dumb!
— Nein, you’re not. Just silly.
— You just call me a different type of dumb.
— I like it when you’re dumb. Makes you cuter.
König is awkward and funny, and he buys you things that you could never afford. He is mysterious and kind – to you, not his enemies – and he uses German words randomly in his phrases because he knows the accent, and the pronunciation drives you crazy. You never thought of thinking of yourself as a dilf hunter but, hell, here you are. With his dark ginger stubble – and grey streaks that make you go wild every time you look at him – between your thighs. It’s tickling, and it’s a bit irritating, and he will rub some calming lotion in your skin after this, making sure to cover every inch of your skin with some expensive cream that he knows jackshit about, but you wanted it, and so he went out and bought it. Gosh, you felt dumb even asking him for this.
He traces his kisses along your thighs, tongue lingers to press against your wet, swollen folds. Flirting in front of Paul made you embarrassingly hot, solidifying you as a shitty, bad, horny person who needs fat cock stuffed in your leaking pussy. You lick your lips, and you tremble when he pushes his tongue inside. He is starving, pushy with all of his needs – makes you almost beg for it, like a pet he took from the street.
— I want to take you to the Summer house next week.
You open your eyes, shocked. It’s nothing, really, you shouldn’t be this surprised about him wanting to show off his other properties. You want to check out his wine cellar and how sturdy the furniture is. You want to see if he had deers running around the house. If he had any pictures of his family – and if you could ever hope to compete with his ex-wife. It’s a petty competition, but you don’t have much to do and to think about. It’s obvious the love here won’t last until the end of the break, and you want to get as much from it as possible. Maybe even some hot bikini picks at his pool. He has to have one. — What if I have plans, sir?
It’s innocent and you play the role well. You think some of your friends wanted to hang out or make a study group for the upcoming semester. You are a good girl at heart, with nice grades and a perfectly played-out future, and not as many working opportunities as you may like, but you could manage with something. Writing a killer essay about your life with a smoke show during Summer would be easy with someone like him.
He laughs, his hand lightly smacks your butt. You bite your lip and whimper, not accustomed to pain feeling this good.
— You will change them, little one. For the whole Summer.
— I wanted to study.
You moan when he lightly presses his tongue on your swollen clit, kissing and licking it. Slick runs down your legs, and he collects it with his mouth. You whimper again, tears prickling at the edge of your eyes – the sensation is sudden and overwhelming, makes you get your hands in his hair and slightly tug. He groans, pleasure from having you so active, so participating is overwhelming. He loves you, loves you, loves you, adores you. God, you’re beautiful. And so, so restrained – just his special good girl. Only for him. — You can study at our house.
— You mean you and your ex’s house.
He smacks you again for the foul language – although you know you didn’t even curse, he is still punishing you. In the lightest way possible, of course, you know you won’t handle anything too harsh – still, you feel nice and warm when he isn’t just eating you out, but also smacks you for speaking in such unpretty words again.
You don’t even register the way he called the house yours too. All too dumb for this, again.
— I mean our house, Schatzen. Just you and your daddy, ja? You worry too much about studying.
— I want a nice job. Without…distractions.
He slips one finger in your warm, tight hole – even just one digit is enough to make you shiver, clenching it like a sloppy whore. He is big in every way – just two of his fingers are bigger than a normal cock, and no, you didn’t want to compare a son with his father, but even Paul’s cock, as big as it was, was still way thinner than his father’s.
— Why you need a job?
— Not everyone are retired military. I need money.
— You have me.
— I d…don’t want to be a sugar baby. Sir.
— I have no problems with being your daddy, Schatzen.
König is build like a powerhouse – when he slips just the tip into you, ignoring all previous preparation because, by god, you both need to feel connected, he is dragging you on top of the table, tossing aside the dirty dishes with remains of his perfectly cooked dinner…and you feel like home. Almost.
You imagine waking up with his cock every morning, and with the nice cup of coffee only he can make. You imagine him gushing about rebuilding the house and working on his tight and neat desk job at the mercenary company – something about instructing, dumb recruits, only the most elite missions as an operator in retirement, creating strategies and tactics for the warfare – and thinking that, wow, your husband is really cool. You shouldn’t be thinking this because this is just a summer fling. Your relationships with Paul weren’t too serious either, you just didn’t want to be alone.
König gently caresses your fingers, whispering something about numbers – you think you could recognize the word for a ring a bit later when he was making a call to some friend. In German, of course, you don’t quite understand it, but you worm your warm on his lap like a spoiled cat, purring on his crotch like a good fucking girl. But it was a while later.
Now, you’re gasping and panting, his cock spreading you open and stuffing you like the poor bird he was cooking for dinner. You know you won’t be able to walk after a short while – would probably have to spend the day at his house, with him cooing and gushing about your sore body while he is quietly proud of himself. If you’re lucky, you could convince him to let you go in the evening. If you’re not, he will ask you to stay the night, and maybe even a bit more, and then he will just get the bag with your stuff from your room in the dorm by himself, and then… — What do you think about getting married in August?
Maybe, you do know why his wife left him.
#cod#konig x reader#konig#yandere konig#cod x reader#call of duty#yandere cod#cod x you#fem reader#konig cod#konig x you
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Part One
There’s a Beta standing in Eddie’s doorway. She’s slim, choppy ginger hair and red boots poking out from under the cuffs of her denim dungarees – Eddie likes her pretty much immediately.
She’s holding a plate.
She hasn’t managed to speak yet, but from down the hall, Eddie hears a voice hiss, “Robin!”
They both turn to look. The Omega of Eddie’s dreams face and...tummy...are both poking out of the doorway. He looks mortified.
“So sorry,” the Beta starts, “Steve was too embarrassed to come and ask a second time, but he’s basically had his nose pressed to the door for the past half an hour so…” she holds out the plate.
From down the hall, very faintly, the Omega, who Eddie now knows must be called ‘Steve,’ whines, “why are you like this,” and then clicks the door shut.
“I’m Robin, by the way,” and she holds out her non plate hand to shake.
Eddie ends up shaking one hand and taking the plate from the other. Eddie knew, objectively, that Steve must have a partner, but he still has to squish the disappointment of meeting them. “Eddie...just, give me a second. It’s chicken parm.”
Eddie goes and dishes up a portion, it was going to be tomorrows lunch but...he can’t deny the pretty little Omega anything. Maybe he should start cooking extra extras, even if Steve doesn’t come knocking, at least it’s a meal he can have another time.
“This is one of his favorites, no wonder he was so restless about it.”
“Yeah, well, anytime,” and Eddie could add that Robin should be making Steve’s favorites, but he doesn’t because he’s pretty sure Robin is cool and he already knows Steve is sweet and he’s just not that kind of person.
Much.
“I’m sorry, you’ve done what to the pulled pork?”
“Orange and Oregano, trust me Henderson, I’m about to blow your mind.”
“Uh hu, and someone else's by the look of it, you’ve cooked enough for us and that Omega guy twice over.” Eddie just rolls his eyes. “You got all your shit put away then?”
“Pretty much, and leave that alone.”
Dustin huffs but puts the spoon down and replaces the lid on the crock pot, “what are we having with it?”
“Was going to do dirty fries.”
“Oh my god. You’re a saint. A hero. You should be knighted like ye olde dragon-slayers of yore-”
“Yeah yeah, this will not score you any extra loot later.”
“Mayhap a smidgen of exper-” Dustin stops at the sound of knocking, looking to the door. “Is it your Omega?” He whisper hisses at Eddie.
“He’s not mine, he’s got a girlfriend,” Eddie whisper hisses back.
Doesn’t stop him pulling his shirt straight and tugging at his jeans and fluffing his hair real quick on the way to the door. All of that is kind of...reflexive, though.
Dustin’s smirk is actually slap worthy, and Eddie will get to that right after he answers the door.
“I am so sorry about this,” Steve is saying before Eddie even has the door fully open, “and I know you said you didn’t want anything, but I thought I could at least contribute.” He’s holding two plates, one empty, one stacked up with cookies, “they’re Reese’s.”
And Eddie’s mouth is watering, not just from the scent of Steve, but because he can see the chunks of partially melted Reese's pieces sticking out of the cookies, “they look incredible, thank you,” Eddie takes both plates, “it’s not actually ready yet, can I drop it by in like, thirty minutes?”
“Oh you are my hero,” Steve beams at him. It’s a happy smile, a smile that comes with the scent of pleased Omega. Happy Omega. Happy Omega with pup. The kind of smile and scent that digs it’s hooks deep into Eddie’s brain and fucking yanks.
“It’s pulled pork, would you rather fries or rice?” Eddie finds himself asking, completely on auto pilot.
“Whatever is easiest. Whatever you were already planning. Thank you so so much Eddie.”
Eddie watches Steve waddle back to his apartment down the hall before he turns, a plate in each hand, and nudges the door closed with his foot.
“Thank you so much Eddie. I made you cookies Eddie,” Dustin simpers from the couch, before making kissey noises.
“Oh shut the fuck up.”
Eddie stands in the hallway in his crocs. His apartment is new, so he has a strict no shoes policy; but he has a pair of crocs for in the hall and heading outside real quick. Also, they're comfortable as fuck, so Eddie refuses to be judged.
Especially since they’re black, and Dustin got him all these little button things that pop in the holes. Little swords and shields and D20’s and stuff. So they’re super cool.
Steve opens the door, wincing, one hand resting on the small of his back, but his face blooms back into the beautiful smile at the sight of Eddie. It does something, very briefly, to Eddie. That reaction. And then he viciously reminds himself that the reaction was for Eddie’s food and not at all for Eddie himself.
Steve goes to take the plate but, “it’s hot, I warmed the plate up in the stove, let me put it down somewhere for you?” A trick Eddie learned in his month of working in a kitchen one Christmas when he was a teenager, but it never left him, and he didn't want Steve’s dinner to go cold.
“Oh, gosh, you’re so thoughtful Eddie, come right in.”
Eddie’s heart gives a little flutter at Steve’s praise, and Steve shifts out of the way, letting Eddie into an apartment that’s a mirror of his own. It’s very neat and tidy inside; everything very clearly has a place. Nothing looks brand new, but everything does look well cared for.
Steve directs Eddie to the little two seater dining table, where there’s a place set. It’s so freaking adorable, a place mat with flowers and kittens printed on it, a white folded napkin, cutlery and a glass of juice set out. A single daffodil in a tiny vase.
Eddie puts the plate down carefully, turning to see Steve blushing furiously. “Sorry, I don’t get out much and I wanted to make it nice.”
“Don’t be sorry, it’s cute,” Eddie says, even as he feels himself grow irritated yet again with Robin, Steve’s nose twitches, eyeing Eddie with concern, so he does his best to push it down, “well,” Eddie tries his best to be cheerful, “I really hope you enjoy it. Maybe your girlfriend will take you out tomorrow?” He tries to say that with no hint of spite whatsoever.
Steve blinks at him, “girlfriend?”
“Robin? I thought...aren’t you two..?”
Steve snorts a laugh, actually ugly laughs and snorts like a cute little piggy and has to bring his hand up to his face to try and hide his reaction, “no. No, she’s my best friend. She’s home with her girlfriend.”
“Oh.” Eddie says, processing, “oh. Right sorry, I just, assumed…” he can’t stop his eyes from, briefly, flicking to Steve’s tummy.
“It’s okay,” Steve’s smiling at him, “you can ask.”
“Well...I mean when I thought you were with Robin I just assumed you’d used a donor or…”
“Yep!” Steve pops the ‘P’. “I did do that, and I did go to the appointments with Robin, but I’m single. Going it alone.”
And then Steve does quite possibly the sexiest thing Eddie’s ever seen in his entire life; he bares his throat, “see, no bite.”
Eddie has to clear his throat and shift a little where he's standing, lest his inconvenient biological reaction become overly obvious, “why did you decide to, uhm…”
Steve shrugs, smiling happily, “guess I just never was lucky enough to meet the right Alpha.”
And then Steve’s tummy rumbles very aggressively.
“I’ll let you eat your-”
“Gosh excuse me I’m-”
They speak at the same time, and then both end up laughing.
“I’ll leave you to your dinner,”
“Thanks again Eddie, I really do appreciate it.”
Part three
#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#steddie#pre getting together#pre steddie#dustin henderson#omega steve harrington#alpha eddie munson#ao3 author#ficlet#ao3 writer#mpreg
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how can i take your order? all you have to do is pick a dessert, drink and driver/character of your choosing! are you in the mood for a mille-feuille or a big slice of chocolate cake! please, please, please indicate who you want me to write about!!
the servers are from the following: formula one, call of duty, baldur's gate 3, haikyuu, one piece, jujustu kaisen, detective comics (dc), marvel comics (but i am open to any other fandoms you might have in mind! please do not hesitate to ask!!)
i do also accept polyam relationships! (pairing + reader), up to about four people! just to make it manageable on my end!
all orders can be made to the inbox for @bunnys-kisses and i'll get your order together asap! also let me know if you want it extra sweet or a little more spicy !
mille-feuille: “that’s it, fuck, that’s a good girl.”
butter tart: "let's ruin ourselves for anyone else."
sugar pie: “gonna let daddy hear ya?”
zebra cake: "well, what do we have here?"
carrot cake: "swallow it. all of it."
millionaire shortcake: "if they saw you now, you'd be the biggest shame to your family."
pots de crème: "if a picture is worth a thousand words, then i could probably get a million dollars for this photo."
oat flapjacks: "i'm not scared of you."
persian rolls: "it's mandatory i finish. you getting to finish is a treat."
spice pie: "i didn't know it was possible to be a liar and a slut."
mushroom pie: "if you don't shut up. i'm going to shut you up."
lemon slice: "i'm sorry, what was that? i can’t hear you over all that noise you’re making."
swiss roll: "everything you own, everything you wear i paid for. so i guess that means i own you."
pumpkin pie: "i've met strays who were more obedient."
pastry braid: "your job is to make me cum. now get to work."
sausage roll: "i wonder how much i could get for photos of this cunt."
pithivier: "if you don't behave, i'll let the boys take care of you."
tiramisu: “my little slut to ruin.”
sponge toffee: "aw, is someone mad that they can only cum because of me?"
pull-apart bread: "i love you"
powered sugar donuts: "marry me."
blueberry bars: “gonna make you a mamma and you're gonna make me a daddy.”
pudding chomeur: "i don't share."
ice cream bars: “did you see the way he was eyeing you? he need to know you're mine."
chocolate cake: "do you feel that? that's what happens when i think about you all day."
soufflé: "i'll be gentle."
fried dough: "i know virginity is a stupid concept... but i want to take yours."
apple pie: "now be good and beg. thank you."
vanilla cheesecake: "where are your manners?"
berry trifle: "wrong. try again."
maple cream pie: "either you wear the necklace with my name on it, or wear my bruises around your neck."
s'more: "The accent gets to you, doesn't it?"
belgian waffles: "i cum in that every night."
pancakes: "if you bite me. i'll bite you back."
loaf of whole wheat bread: "you're going to shut that mouth and take me."
jos louis: "does someone need a daddy?"
maple taffy: "oh my god you're stupid."
snowballs: "don't worry, drug tests aren't till next week."
shortbread cookies: "and who does this belong to?"
flan: "i'm not possessive... i'm obsessive."
peach cake: "if you spill a drop, we start all over."
angel food cake: "if he fucks with me again, i'm finishing inside of you."
red velvet cupcake: "if you don't like being called a whore, then stop acting like one."
mince pie: "i'm not jealous."
banana bread: "i'm going to fuck that sweet pussy of yours until the only word your little brain can form is my name."
crumb cake: "if you just listened, all of this could've been avoided."
chocolate chip cookies: "you're beautiful when you smile, but you're the prettiest when my cock is in your throat"
nanaimo bars: "who's my pretty girl? c'mon say it."
coffee cake: "knees. now."
sourdough bread: "i'm going to breed you."
blueberry muffins: "i don't think it'll fit."
pound cake with strawberries: "you know i hate going over rules, but just because i like seeing you embarrassed, i'll tell you them again."
croissant: "i wonder if your father knows what happens during the off hours. if he knows you're here with me."
crepe: "pretty girl."
french toast: "you're trying to make me jealous!"
churros: "if you don't shut that little mouth of yours, i will stuff it full. okay?"
shortbread squares: "you're just mad that that my cock fits perfectly in you now. must be a blow to the ego that we're a perfect match."
savory pastry: "let your brother find out."
sweet pastry: "i'll make it all better."
eclairs: "the family's precious little girl. under me like a slut."
boston cream pie: "yeah, i'll use protection."
bagel: “gonna paint you with my teeth.”
crostata: “stupid slut, this is what you wanted huh? wanted me to fuck you like i hate you.”
tres leches: "i wonder if your brother know i cum in you."
peanut butter bars: “scratch me, bite me, just mark me sweetheart. show them I’m yours.”
eton mess: "be careful. your breath smells like cum."
scones: "but what if they see us!"
english muffin: "aw, is someone crying?"
honey cruller: "i forget how small you are sometimes."
banana split: "don't look at me like that."
beer brownies: "stick your tongue out anymore and you'll look like a dog."
fudge: "your father is pissing me off."
sticky toffee pudding: "the only way this is ending is you getting pregnant."
hot cross buns: "don't hide your face from me. i'd hate to have to tie you up."
brownies: "you're so much more agreeable when you have something to occupy that mouth of yours."
chocolate mousse: "the only necklace you need is my hand around your throat"
tim bits: "stupid little thing."
fruitcake: "i'll make tonight special."
cornmeal muffin: "i need you most."
devil's food cake: "you're my most unhealthy obsession."
crème caramel: "oh. you thought you were getting away from me?"
banana & chocolate muffins: "i'm only doing this because you need to learn how to behave, rules are rules, and you need to follow them."
custard tart: "i've never done this before."
cinnamon rolls: "no one needs to know."
mango sorbet: "you are by far the dumbest thing i've ever fucked. how did they even let you graduate?"
date squares: "you look better with my marks on you."
figgy duff: "if i buy it, will you stop pouting?"
spicy upside down cake: "let's play a game: don't get caught."
cream puffs: "let me finish inside."
profiteroles: "come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go."
with a side of:
coffee: rivals
tea: semi-public/public sex
juice: cockwarming
mocha coffee: breeding kink
bubble tea: daddy kink
a vodka shot: rough sex
sparkling water: gentle sex
coconut water: alternate universe
energy drink: doggy style
champagne: sugar daddy situation
hard lemonade: possessive behaviour
espresso shot: dirty talking
a glass of wine: cowgirl position
ice capp coffee: werewolf au
bloody mary: vampire au
martini: mafia au
frozen latte: dumbification
frozen lemonade: consensual non-consent
cranberry juice: mean!character
glass of water: aftercare
chocolate milk: tenderness
milkshake: size kink
pina colada: pregnancy
cider: body worship
mai tai: loss of virginity
margarita: unprotected sex
mint julep: punishments
chai: biting/hickies
earl grey: big cock
fishbowl cocktail: protected sex
tonic water: age gap
matcha latte: collars/bondage
root beer: filming/recording
soda: jealousy
americano: oral sex
whisky: degrading language
vitamin water: dom/sub dynamic
irish coffee: high sex
sangria: drunk sex
dark roast coffee: sub!character
dark hot chocolate: sub!reader
iced tea: accidentally launching relationship
lemon water: university/college au
naked & famous: bimbo/ditzy!reader
on the house: author's choice!
ORDER UP!
#bunny speaks#smut prompts#formula one#call of duty#bunny writes#call of duty modern warfare#reader insert#call of duty smut#call of duty x reader#simon ghost riley#john soap mctavish smut#captain john price smut#captain john price#john price#phillip graves#kyle gaz garrick#charles leclerc#max verstappen#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic
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