#FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP FOLLOWING ME YOU 18+ ACCOUNTS

[sturthepotofmadness]

I can’t believe I have to post this but…

IF AN ACCOUNT FOLLOWS ME THAT IS CLEARLY ELUDING TO THAT THING WHICH IS 18+ YOU WILL BE BLOCKED

I also can see if you liked and/or reblogged anything I post, so that doesn’t help you’re case either.

[juletheghoul]

home

a/n: The premiere look was a literal gift from the Gods, truly fantastic stuff. With that said, of course I had to work on the next chapter of The General and his Girlwife. This isn't the end for them, there is still so much life for them and I have a whole inbox full of amazing asks (I promise I haven't forgotten about them!) to get through, and I always welcome any and all comments and questions or deep dives! Hope you enjoy 💕xo

Warnings; 18+ no minors, vague but big-legal age gap, piv sex, dirty talk, Marcus eats pussy because he's a KING, lactation kink, creampie, Marcus gets emotional, pregnancy and baby stuff, childbirth and some graphic descriptions of pain, talks of infertility, **FEELINGS** let me know if I missed any!

This is the fic I referenced in this preview

Pairing: Marcus Acaciusx F!Reader

word count: 5k (whoops!)

reblogs are appreciated

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The ritual had been completed, and a week later–life had gone back to normal. The two of you had vowed to put it out of your mind until the Gods made their intentions for you clear. 

Marcus, however, was leaving; he'd been called on by the Emperor for a tour, and he had no choice but to accept.

You pouted, and he smiled. 

“It is only for a short time, my love. Barely a moon's turn and I will be back in this house, and your arms.” He smiled despite your obvious displeasure, giddy with the way you clutched so greedily at him. 

“I wish to follow you Marcus, I do not wish to stay here without you.” You buried your face into his neck, taking in his comforting scent greedily. Your nails dug into his shoulders, holding him close while his own wrapped tightly around your waist. 

“And I wish nothing more than for you to be with me, but you cannot. It is not a place for women and I would not have my beautiful,” his hands cupped your cheeks, pressing kisses to your mouth between words, “lovely, tempting wife there pulling at my attention, as well as that of the bolder men in my company.”

You sigh, knowing he would not change his mind. 

“Very well. I will content myself alone.” Your tone made him laugh, and you smiled into his skin, well aware that you sounded more akin to an unruly child than a grown, married woman. 

“You are spoiled, terribly misbehaved and spoiled.” His hands slipped down and grabbed at your backside, “and it is entirely my fault.” 

“Yes it is.” You jut your chin out and he pressed a kiss to it. “When do you leave?” 

“Preparations are being made and I depart in three days time.” He pressed another kiss to the back of your hand, smiling as he led you to sit with him. “Once I am back, I shall plan something for us. How does that sound?” 

“And what shall you plan?” 

“We could travel, we could go to the sea and take in the fresh air, we could do anything my love. Whatever makes you happy.” His eyes shone with the same love you felt in your very bones for him. 

“I only need you for that.” 

-

The intensity of the craving made you frown, pulling your attention from the task of refilling the cellars of your house. One minute you had been taking note of how much grain there was, how much olive oil and wine was in your stores and the next, the desire for figs and honey and fresh, ripe pomegranate was so strong it almost moved your feet towards the kitchens. You stopped yourself though, running through your mental tally of days since your last blood and willing yourself to stay calm. 

“Girl, be a dear and fetch me figs and honey if you would.” You pat her hand softly, unable to stop yourself from softening the imagined blow of asking for something instead of fetching it yourself. Her eyes widened for a moment, before nodding. 

“Yes Domina.” She ran off, and you ignored the looks of the women who were helping you with your accounts. 

“Shall we call for a Medicus, Domina?” The eldest of them whispered in your ear, one who has always treated you with a softness that at times felt motherly, her work roughened hand landing soft on your shoulder. Nerves fluttered in your belly, a deep seeded fear threading through your very being as the memory of your loss filled your mind's eye so vividly it set your hands to shaking. But another emotion emerged, a fragile thing coloured with a hope so big it didn’t fit within your body. Without Marcus, it was difficult to navigate the swirl of different feelings fighting for dominance.

“Domina, let me call for the Medicus.” Gently, she guided you to sit, silently dismissing the staff tending to you. “I think it best you rest while we wait, I shall have him brought here to look you over.” 

“Yes, yes that is what we must do. I—yes I should rest a while.” With a shaky breath you smiled a smile that did not reach your eyes, and headed towards your chamber. 

When the medicus finally did arrive, the older woman held your hand, doing much to calm you in the absence of Marcus. Silently the man went about his business, checking and prodding and looking for the signs that you tentatively prayed were there. 

When he raised his head and smiled with a nod, both you and the woman cried with joy.

-

He was eager to step foot in his house, eager to be reunited with his heart. 

His blessedly peaceful campaign had gone well, the Emperor was in good spirits and for the first time in years, there was peace. He couldn’t wait to tell her how it had gone, couldn’t wait to press his kisses upon her skin. 

The house was surprisingly quiet when he finally arrived, the guards were hushed, his usual attendants were nowhere to be seen and his love was not where he thought he’d find her. 

When he reached their shared room things were stranger still, the gauzy linens were drawn across the windows, blocking out most of the sunlight. Incense was burning, and for a moment he feared she’d fallen ill while he’d been gone.

“My love? What is the matter?” She reclined in their bed, propped up on a nest or pillows, and her face lit up to see him. She was glowing, a soft sheen shining on her brow and for a moment he thought it might be a fever but she looked well, she looked beautiful. 

“I am well Marcus, truly.” She beckoned to him, arms outstretched and he all but ran to her side, sitting close to hold her hands. “We have been blessed, my love, truly blessed.” Tears shone in her eyes, he frowned for a moment until she placed his hand on her belly, and then it felt like his heart would jump out of chest. 

“You are sure?” He brought his face to her womb, pressing his lips to it while trying not to fall apart with joy. “Truly?”

“It has been confirmed, I am with child. You are to be a father, Marcus.” She shone with life, with vitality and was as beautiful as a Goddess, he couldn’t handle the joy in his heart. He wept into her belly, thanking the Gods, and praying for the health of the love of his life, and the child inside her.

-

Every single day of those first few weeks greeted you with fear.

Every free minute, every spare thought was filled with silent prayer, offerings were made to appease the Gods, you ate only the foods suggested by the Medicus. Marcus let you do nothing except rest, and take short, slow walks throughout the house. He was thorough with the instructions given to him, he rubbed the special oil onto the skin of your belly to help with the growth, he never left your side, he was gentle in all things. 

Once you started to show, and the most dangerous period had passed, even you started to shed some of the fear. Hope, and joy filled the house and everyone shared in it. The women were eager to have a little one running around, Marcus grew more and more excited at the prospect and filled your house with things for the child. Toys and a special chair, robes and little tunics to dress them in.

“Have you thought of a name?” You asked him as he rubbed at your tired feet, easing the ache as your stomach seemed to grow before your very eyes. 

“I have, but I haven’t really given any option much thought. It is best to wait until the child is born I think. And you? Is there a name you favour?”

“Well, a boy would definitely be named Marcus after you.” You smiled, imagining a miniature of him. 

“And for a girl?”

“We could honour the Gods, name her Diana, I also think Aurelia is quite pretty, or Acacia and name her after her father.” Your smile grew, imagining a little darling with his soft waves, his square feet.

“Fine choices.” He smiled, moving to the other foot and you sighed, soothed by his touch. 

“I will pray for a boy, to carry your name and carry on your legacy.” He shook his head.

“Give me a clever girl with your eyes, and your smile and I shall be happier than any other man alive.” He pressed a kiss to your shin. Tears sprung to your eyes, it was happening a lot of late, the baby made your emotions run rampant, his sweetness didn’t help.

“There there my love, no tears.” He soothed with gentle tone, well aware of your sensitivity, yet still as patient and loving as always. 

“I cannot help it, the joy is overwhelming, the love for you, for this little being is too much to fit inside me.” You held your belly, tears falling to dampen the skin of your chest. He moved to sit beside you, and gathered you into his arms, once again soothing you beyond words could explain. 

“I understand, I have been so blessed in this life it is difficult not to dwell and fear the worst. Let us just enjoy our good fortune, no more tears, it pains me to see you cry.” He pressed his lips to your forehead and you nodded silently, throat aching with emotion. 

With a tenderness that only made the ache stronger, he kissed the tear stains on your skin, smiling softly. When he got to your mouth, it was a reassuring press, a silent promise to you and to the life growing inside. It helped, but your mood, your appetites changed like the winds these days and the tears turned to desire for him so fast it made your head spin. 

Your tongue breached his mouth, corrupting the softness of his kiss and pulling a groan from somewhere in his chest. His hand pressed softly to your womb, while his mouth claimed yours in the softness of your shared bed. 

“Marcus-” It came out half moaned, half pleading. 

“Yes my love?” He breathed the words into the skin of your neck, his tongue mapping out the lines he liked to travel with his kisses, unsurprised at how quickly your passion for him was stirred with the child inside.

“Do you desire me? Do you wish for me to give you my cock?” Slowly, he exposed you, pulling the special tunic made to accommodate your belly off. The large swell, the heavy weight of your breasts, the swelling in your feet–all of the changes in your body had made you fear he would no longer find you desirable. He’d been quick to correct that assumption however. 

With your lip caught between your teeth, you nodded. 

Carefully, he turned you on your side, supporting the weight of your belly with pillows and linens before divesting himself of his own layers. The sight of him, skin golden and cock hardening turned your cunt to liquid. He smiled at the open desire on your face, positioning himself so he straddled the thigh resting on the bed, while lifting and holding the other, lining himself up at the mouth of your cunt. 

“Are you comfortable?” Your heart swelled for a moment, smiling at him before nodding. 

He took himself in hand, stroking a few times to bring himself to full mast before finally sinking in to the hilt. 

“So wet.” He whispered almost to himself, eyes focused on the way your cunt swallowed his length whole, coating it in your arousal. “My pretty little wife, with her pretty little cunt.” His fingers gripped at your thigh while he found his rhythm, angling himself to find the spot–

You keened, gasping as he huffed out a satisfied laugh. 

“There it is, that is the spot, yes?” He focused, hitting it like a bullseye while you clutched at the linens, too blissed out to answer but it mattered not, he knew. Sweat beaded on his brow, the muscles in his arms gleamed in the low candlelight as he panted out his exertion. His beauty so obvious, so highlighted there as he loved you that it filled the little space in your belly not filled with his child with the beating of butterfly wings. 

Your fingers reached out to him, needing to feel him surround you and he smiled, leaning forward to catch the tips of them with his lips while his hips moved faster. Your arousal pooled at the base of him, soaking the fine patch of hair between your legs, as well as the curls at the base of his cock.

With a crooked grin, he reached between your legs to swirl his thumb around your swollen clit and the climax is so close your legs start to tremble. 

“Don’t stop, please don’t stop Marcus–” It was so close, building like a fire in your hips, spreading like lightning throughout your veins, dripping from where you were joined onto the linens of your bed. Your hand crept down, joining his to press his fingers closer, to guide his movements faster until you burst around him, squeezing him so tight he groaned and slowed his steady thrusting to a grind, his groin pressed tight. Your cunt fluttered around him, pleasure blooming and flooding your body like good, strong wine and it only intensified when he started moving again, chasing his own end while you floated on your cloud. It only took him a few thrusts before he filled you, fucking his seed deep. 

His chest rose and fell with each rapid breath, smiling and laughing softly as he pulled himself out.

Your combined passion smeared against your hip when he surged forward to claim your mouth in a kiss. His big hand curled around the curve of your neck softly, such a contrast to how it gripped your thigh. It slid down, smooth as silk before squeezing at your breast. 

“Oh!’ The warm drip shocked you, the milk beaded at your nipple before dripping down the valley between your breasts. The bigger shock though, was how quickly he chased it with his tongue. The arousal only flared again, sharp as a knife at the moan he let out. With an almost drunk expression, he wrapped his lips around the peak, and tasted your milk straight from the source. 

“Good?” Your fingers threaded through his sweat-soaked waves, cradling him close while he drank deep. His expression was almost sheepish, almost ashamed when he pulled away. 

“I do not know what has come over me,” He licked at the tip, staring at the other breast longingly, “I had to taste you, it’s so sweet.” He dipped his head again, drinking from the other breast, deep, strong pulls that only made the red hot coal of desire within you burn even brighter than before. When he pulled away he was breathing hard, shocked at his own reaction. 

“Did I hurt you?” He licked at sensitive peaks again, filling your brain with a fog of lust so strong you could barely think. 

“No, not at all, it feels really good.” You pulled him closer, urging him to drink, while guiding his hand between your legs. With a knowing grin, he obeyed. 

-

You knew from the moment your eyes opened in the morning, that the baby would come. There was an ache, a pulsing, a violence to its movements within your womb. The child was as impatient to emerge, as you were to give birth and finally have it whole and healthy in your arms. 

With a sigh, you tried to adjust yourself, smiling as Marcus pressed himself closer in his sleep, his big hand holding the swell. 

“I think today is the day, hmm?” You whispered to your belly, it kicked hard enough to make you wince. 

“Gods above, I felt that one, this child will be strong.” He pressed a kiss to your shoulder, pulling another sigh from you. “How are you feeling?”

“I think it will be today, it feels like the baby has moved lower.” You did your best to rise, groaning before he all but lifted you to sit upright. 

“I will make the preparations, the midwife is ready and waiting for our summons.” He rose quickly, making you laugh with his urgency.

“Peace Marcus, it will not be right this second, but I do feel it mightl be today.” You stood, gingerly padding towards him, waving away his frown of concern. “Walking is good for me, it will help me with my labours.” He still frowned, meeting you halfway and squeezing you as tightly as he could without causing you pain. 

“I will be with you, at your side the whole time.” There was a small tremble in his voice you did not recognize, a nervous aura about him that seemed to bolster you. How curious, you thought, that his moment of fear, is my moment of courage. 

“The midwife and her attendants will be there, most men wait until the child is born–”

“I am not most men. I will be with you, holding your hand and wiping at your brow. This is a battle I cannot fight for you, but no one will keep me out of that room.” He pressed his face into your neck and you softened, his fear was justified. Many children did not survive their coming into the world, many mothers died alongside them. You said nothing, nodding softly as his fingers dug into your robes. 

The sun made its way across the sky and as it did your pains grew stronger. Cramps painful enough to steal your breath would squeeze at you like a fist for a few minutes before releasing you. The midwife walked with you, she took note of how much time passed between each attack, readying the birthing stool as well as her oils, her sponges and enough water and linens to be able to tend to both you and the baby. 

The sun was kissing the horizon when the water came, spilling all over your feet like a tidal wave and sending Marcus into a cold panic. 

The midwife did her examinations while your body ripped itself in two. With barely contained screams, and sweat dripping down your brow you got into position, doing your best to focus on your breathing while Marcus kept his word, silently wiping at your brow, and letting you squeeze his hand as hard as you could. 

“It must be now, push.” The midwife and one of her girls were in place, moving your robes aside to have access and you did what you had to do. You pushed. 

It was agony. 

It was liquid fire burning its way through your body, this baby wasn’t being born, it was clawing and tearing its way out of you. 

Marcus whispered into your ear, encouragingly, lovingly, patiently guiding you to breathe, to not give up. He reminded you how strong you were, how loved and how soon it would be over. How could it be over soon? It felt as though this pain had been with you at your own birth, all of your life this pain has been here, it had to be. Hours, days? You could not tell how long it had been.

You cried, you begged for it to end, you willed it to be so; shouted and screamed that it hurt too much, that it was too hard and that you could not do it. You told them that the baby would not come, that you could not do this, you were not strong enough. You screamed that this would surely kill you, you would tear in two and die.

“You will not die, you can do this, my love. Bear down, and push.” His gaze was steely, focused and firm and it filled you with courage.

With a sob and a scream you pushed, and pushed. You pushed so much you thought you’d burst and then pushed more still. Until finally, blessedly, the baby came out.

“You have done it! You have done it my love, my beautiful, strong, courageous girl, you have done it!” Tears were in his eyes as he held onto your limp form, but he was not looking at you. 

“Why does the child not cry?” It felt like you’d drunk too much wine, the relief from the pain so great you would faint soon, yet still, silence. There was a lot of movement, a terrifying moment that seemed to stretch on for an eternity and despite Marcus all but carrying you and laying you back to rest, no one met your eye. 

“Answer me, Marcus, why does the baby not cry? Give it to me! Is it a boy? Is it a girl?” Tears flowed and fear swelled like bile crawling up your throat until a cry loud enough to hurt your ears sounded and the entire room breathed a collective sigh of relief. 

“She is a beautiful, healthy and whole baby girl.” Swaddled and screaming, the bundle was placed at your breast. Marcus sobbed, openly and loudly into your shoulder, his big hand covering her tiny head while you looked at her in awe. She had so much hair, such strong lungs, such a force that you laughed, still crying. 

“Yes my little love, I know, you fought so hard.” You pressed a kiss to her little brow, doing your best to soothe her. 

She took to nursing your breast quickly, a good sign the midwife said and while she and her girls set everything to rights, you could focus on nothing but her. Her little hands clutched at you, taking a few greedy pulls before falling asleep, milk smeared all over her perfect face. 

“She is utterly perfect, she has your hands.” Marcus lay beside you, his gaze on her as though entranced. 

“She has your hunger.” You smiled, the euphoria eclipsing everything. It was so hard to stay awake though, the birth had taken so much out of you. 

“Give her to me and rest. I will be here with you.” With gentle hands, he took her, managing to put her onto his chest without waking her and before he’d even fully settled, sleep had claimed you. 

-

She had fought, both of them had. 

His girls had battled, fought tooth and nail and had come through victorious, though his love had paid a price. She’d bled, bled enough that it had frightened him, chilled him to the bone and when the midwife pulled him aside he already knew what she would say. There would be no more children, another birth might kill her. 

He mourned the fact that his daughter would have no siblings, no other children to fill this house alongside her but his wife would live. That was all that mattered. 

He watched her as she slept, glowing still, if a little wan, weakened by her labours but beautiful all the same. He could no longer imagine living this life without her, he could not see the joy in anything without her there beside him and now his daughter held the other half of his heart. She was the fruit of their union, she was the parts of them that would live on, the living embodiment of his good fortune and just the sight of her filled his eyes with tears. 

He pressed his lips to her little brow, smiling at the furrow in them when he jostled her, so like her mother it made him cry all the harder. 

This was all that mattered, his entire world was in this bed and he was loath to ever be separated from them again.

He didn’t know which name to call her, they’d never settled on anything. Acacia didn’t seem right, how could he name her after himself when she so resembled her mother already? Aurelia, that was pretty, Diana too. He would wait though, let her have the last say. He basked in the glow of the candles, in the comfort of his wife’s warm weight beside him, in the small weight at his chest and said another silent prayer in thanks.

-

She was so big already, three whole months and her growth never ceased to amaze you. She still looked tiny in her fathers arms, his broadness compared to her small body always made you smile, especially because for her he was less the brutal Roman General, and more of a soft, lump of honey. She ruled him implicitly, her every cry, her every happy sound was the reason he breathed.

“My love, I need to change her, those little robes are covered in milk.” There was no bite in your words, there could be no anger or annoyance in you at his adoration of her.

“Yes, yes you are right, she must be changed.” He smiled, bringing her to you. She was tired, yawning and fussing, fighting off her midday slumber with a fierceness that made you laugh. 

“Yes yes I know Diana, one moment and then your father will rock you.” You cooed at her, making quick work of the change and taking the opportunity to wipe her down with a damp cloth before returning her where she slept the best, her fathers chest.

Once he took her and sat at his favoured chair, she was out, little fist curled under her chin. This was his favourite, and yours. Watching her sleep peacefully, safe and loved within your arms, or his. 

“I never grow tired of studying her, already her little face is changing.”

He pressed his lips to her head, breathing in the clean, baby milk smell of her. 

“She will have your hair, already it curls when I wash it.” You thread your fingers through the fine wisps of it softly, smiling to imagine her older with curls flowing down her back. 

“She has your look, your look exactly. I am still in awe that we have created something so perfect.” His hand took yours and brought it to his lips, you bent to press yours to his forehead. 

“As am I, how blessed we are to have her, to have each other.” 

-

When he slipped into bed, you pressed your fingers to your lips, eyes wide to warn him.

“She is finally asleep, we must not wake her.” Your whisper was frantic, and he nodded.

“Yes my lady, I will be silent as the grave.” He pulled you close, whispering in your ear before pressing soft kisses to your shoulder. 

“So long as you can keep your voice down when I love you.” His hands pawed at you but you were so tired, it was hard to reconcile the intense want for him, with the ache of the day settling heavy on your bones. 

“My love, my mind desires this, but my body is so tired.” You pouted at him, mildly upset to deny him.

“Shall I use my mouth? You can lay back and relax, I can take care of you—my lovely girl deserves pleasure, and rest.” He smiled, undeterred and you could not help but smile. 

“And it does not bother you that I will just lay here? Most likely asleep before you have come up for air?” His grey waves were so soft when you raked your fingers through them. 

“It pleases me to please you, you are the mother of my child and the love of my life, I would do anything for you.” He kissed your fingers before spreading your legs wide with the breadth of his shoulders. “Do you wish for me to stop?” He pressed a kiss to your inner thigh, and then the soft patch of hair at your mound, before kissing the lips of your sex. 

“No, I do not wish for you to stop.” You spread your legs a little wider and his smile grew bigger, letting a big glob of his own spit fall onto your sex before chasing it with his tongue.

He is focused, honed in with his gaze and with his tongue on your clit, flat wide licks from where your arousal drips up to the bundle of nerves and it’s like a spike of arousal pierced the very heart of you every time he swiped his tongue over it. Warm, wet and perfect, he swirled around it in time with your heartbeat, fanning the embers burning in your belly for him. 

The fingers that softly scratched at his scalp, now curled into the waves holding him in place as you struggled to keep your mouth shut, but he made it so difficult. The ache building as his brow creased with concentration and his own excitement. His own hand crept down and grasped his cock, stroking at it in time with the delicious circuit of his tongue. That he gained so much pleasure from this only heightened your own, and soon the knot tightened. 

Muscles clenched, all of your body a taut string waiting to snap with every pass, every strong lick. You pinched at a nipple, pulling his eyes up to find yours and he let out a low groan, the vibration of it pushed you over the edge with a silent gasp, and empty rhythmic clenches around nothing. He bestowed a final, filthy kiss to your overstimulated clit before moving quickly to get into position. With the shine of exertion glinting on his golden skin he knelt between your legs, pumping at himself furiously before silently, violently spilling onto your still fluttering sex. Hot, milky splashes of him covering it while he gripped at your thigh hard enough to bruise.

He caught his breath, smearing himself in his own mess between your legs past the point of discomfort. He was so beautiful like this, with the flush of passion lighting up his cheeks and his ears, spreading down his chest. 

He smiled, winking at you before he grabbed the cloth from the basin and cleansing the mess he had made. You wanted to hold and be held by him, but by the time he was done, you were already asleep.

-

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[shellshocklove]

brat two: i might say something stupid | joel miller

pairing/AU: joel miller x brat!female!reader – no outbreak

summary: joel is continuing to have a brat summer.

warnings: this is an 18+ fic so mdni! age gap, enemies to lovers vibes? swearing, use of pet names, smut, brat taming?, dom!joel, some daddy!joel, manhandling, some light bondage, a little exhibitionism? a little dacryphilia, praise, degradation (whore, slut), some sub space territory, edging, creampie, unprotected sex (don’t do it!!), no use of y/n

a/n: ok, so a part two to this!! i’m giving reader a backstory in this so if that’s not your cup of tea and prefer the reader to be a blank slate, then maybe this isn’t for you. as always i wanna give a little shout out to @dustydaddyyy for always helping me when i'm stuck! <3 i know it's demure fall soon, but there's still some brat summer left, so happy reading! 💚

main masterlist / series masterlist / ao3

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸 this account stands with palestine. the creator of tlou is a zionist, and the second game is largly based on israel/palestine. please, everyone who interacts, educate yourself about the genocide happening right now, and support/donate.

Joel.

Joel. Joel. Joel.

Joel Miller.

Miller. Miller. Miller.

The cicadas rattled in the breeze coming through the window of your childhood bedroom. It was hotter than Satan’s ass crack, and sleep couldn’t pull you under. The hem seam of your ratty sleep shirt was fraying, and you couldn’t keep yourself from picking at it – pulling at the threat.

Pull, pull, pull.

Joel Miller. That was his name on the mailbox, but he’d only told you Joel. Just Joel.

Yes, sir. Please, Daddy. Bye, Joel.

With a huff you sat up, your back resting against the headboard as your eyes rolled over the darkened room. The shadows shapeshifted before your eyes like ghosts, and you wondered if you deserved to be haunted.

It hadn’t even been twenty-four hours.

You could still feel the phantom stretch of his cock inside you, and your cheeks were sore from his spanking, but it was nothing compared to your thoughts plagued by him.

God, you felt crazy, like a little girl with a school crush on the teacher.

Except, you didn’t have crushes, didn’t like, or fall in love, with anyone. People had a crush on you, people fell in love with you, people liked you.

Biting down on the soft skin of the inside of your cheek, you ripped away the thin blanket covering your bottom half as your feet touched the cold hardwood floor.

The switch on your bedside lamp clicked as the warm glow seemed to scare the ghosts away. The ratty shirt fell over your knees as you walked across the room and flung open the door. A triangle of light cut the hardwood floor in two as you made your way down the hall and stairs. The slapping of bare feet against wood echoed against the tall ceiling, and eyes followed you from the faces on the wall.

Stepping into the kitchen, you were alone. Pierre had left right after dinner, and Eva had left early with her daughter. You didn’t like to keep them longer than needed, especially on weekends. Your father would pay them the same, anyway – and it was just you here.

You hated the other house. It was no place to live, it was a place of business, for politics. You hated this house too, but for other reasons – too many memories, plastered on smiles and lies. The dentist had told you to start wearing a night guard when they divorced, but you’d stopped wearing it when you went to college.

Grabbing a glass from the cupboard, you made your way over to the fridge. Your whole body felt heavy, your head rolling off your shoulder when something caught your eye in the backyard.

It was gone.

“Shit.”

An ice cube escaped the rim of your glass and split into a thousand pieces on the tiled floor. You pulled your glass from the dispenser in the fridge, and hunkered down, ice melting between your fingers.

With a sigh you watched the splintered ice vanish, dripping in an erratic rhythm that added to the small puddle on the floor. You didn’t want to feel like this. Why were you feeling like this?

You left the glass of ice on the counter– let the ice melt on the floor and escaped through the sliding doors into the backyard. The sky was bright with light pollution over the trees, and everywhere the buzzing of cicadas filled your ears. With a sigh, you fell into one of the chairs, the cushion stiff against your back as your eyes landed on the large oak. You trailed your eyes over the branches, the one’s you’d known every crook and cranny of when you were a child.

It was gone.

The small crooked, and probably dangerous, treehouse where you’d spent so many hours hiding away as a child. Not that they ever noticed, your parents, too busy yelling at each other to see where their daughter had vanished.

Of course it was gone.

Gone, like the happy little girl you’d used to be. And what had taken her place? A party girl? A mess of a woman hiding behind the disguise of a sharp tongue?

Jesus Christ, you needed to get your shit together. Distract yourself– pull yourself away from all the feelings you couldn’t control.

Shifting uncomfortably, you fished your phone from where it had drowned in the cushions. The bright blue light burned your eyes as you scrolled, pulling you from everything real to unreality. Plastered on smiles and perfect bodies, sunny beaches, and aesthetic photos. You handed out hearts like they cost nothing, and pretended you hadn’t seen your DMs.

Still, you couldn’t shake the thought of him. The way the weight of him had felt over you, how he’d spoken, voice rough and commanding, but still playful. It was like you were guided by a puppeteer when your thumb hovered over the google search.

Joel Miller.

You didn’t know what you’d expected – Joel Miller wasn’t a one in a million name, and now you were scrolling through every Joel Miller famous enough to throne at the top of a google search. But, you weren’t going to give up that easily. You moved on to Facebook. He was old, he’d have to have one.

Bingo.

There he was. A few years younger, his hair a little messy, smiling bright. His profile was private, and you sure as hell weren’t sending him a friend request, but something inside you screamed to know more about the man you’d let come inside you less than twenty-four hours ago.

You tried to click your way through his pictures, but there was nothing to see. Next, you tried the about page: Lives in Austin, Texas (this you obviously already knew)… born September 26th… Male… Single… You felt a smile tug at the corners of your mouth, as you continued to scroll... Works for Miller Contracting… And finally, his family: Tommy Miller.

His brother’s profile needed a lesson in internet safety. This man shared everything and all for strangers to see. You flicked through photos of neighborhood cookouts, date nights with his soon to be wife, the same graduation pictures of a girl you’d seen hanging on Joel’s wall.

‘Proudest uncle in the world! Congratulations, Sarah Miller! 😄❤️ The smartest and most talented Miller! 🙌’

Your finger hovered over his daughter’s name, curiosity gnawing at your insides. Shaking your head, you clicked away. You could own up to stalking his Facebook, and his brother had basically invited you to stalk, but his daughter? It felt like crossing a line you couldn’t come back from. Back on Tommy’s profile you noticed he also worked for Miller Contracting.

A family business.

Continuing your research, you clicked through to the business’ profile. The profile looked to be run by Tommy, with frequent updates on projects they’d worked on, from renovations to outdoor landscaping, to new condos, Miller Contracting had a broad resume, but the contact person was set to one Joel Miller.

A thought tickled at the back of your brain then, and your gaze flicked from your phone to the low-lit backyard. A smile you couldn’t fight back pulled at your lips.

The sun beat down on the men as they worked. A bright yellow dot in the clear blue sky. From your bedroom window you watched them, how they’d turned the previous green patch of grass into a deep moldy hole.

Convincing your father had been easy enough; he’d shrugged, and given his default answer to pretty much any request you had, which was a bored ‘Yes, sweetie.’ For years now, the rule of thumb with your dad had been: as long as you didn’t bother him and his busy schedule, he didn’t care what you did. 

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. As long as nothing you did reflected badly on him, and especially on the carefully curated image of ‘loving family man’ his constituents seemed to love so much, he didn’t care. The Governor of Texas couldn’t have his daughter’s bad decisions cost him votes, after all.

Your mother had always said it, always complained over her extra dry martinis, that your father only cared about one thing in his life, and it wasn’t his family. Your face soured as you thought about it. 

Votes. 

Your mother hadn’t been right about a lot of things in your life, but she had been right about this. Votes, and power. That’s all he’d ever cared about. It had been like that ever since you were a child, and over time, you’d learned to exploit that fact like you would a weakness, holding it as leverage over his head if he ever told you no, which he naturally never did. The agreement was silent, but clear as day; as long as you got your way, you would cater to his image, and behave. 

And you did; showed up when needed with a smile that hurt your cheeks, kept up his image, and in turn you got your way.

The swimming pool was just another ask in a long line of wishes. He’d questioned you at first, ‘You want to build a pool in the middle of summer?’ The pool you didn’t care for, it was the men who’d build it. You’d given your father your look, the one where you tipped your head down slightly, bit your bottom lip and looked at him with doe-y eyes. He’d had a landscape architect draw up something for you by the end of the week, and by Monday he’d had the city approve the changes to the premises. He’d given you a rise of his eyebrow when you’d pitched the contractors you wanted for the job, but nevertheless, he’d put his assistant on the job right away.

They’d arrived bright and early this morning, their shouts over loud machines pulling you from your slumber. You’d pulled your pillow over your head, dying to catch some more Z’s, it was summer break after all, but the pull of seeing him again was too strong. The excitement bubbled in your chest, and a satisfied grin spread across your face when you’d realized your plan had worked.

Joel Miller was in your backyard, standing under the oak tree with his hands on his hip, as he carefully watched over his crew. His work clothes fit him just as well as the t-shirt and jeans he’d worn at the club, but he looked less polished– his hair messier with a carpenter’s pencil tucked behind his hair. Your eyes trailed over him from where you watched from the house, how he moved about the site, helped his men when needed, evaluating every step, studying the drawings carefully as he ordered his men around with the same authority you’d come to know him for after the night you’d spent together.

If all of this went well, you’d have him again.

“Looking good, guys! But it’s a bit loud,” you shouted over the excavator, one arm raised to shade your eyes from the sun from where you stood at the edge of the veranda.

You watched how the men milled about, squinting up from their work at you. Their gazes lingered over your body, they weren’t subtle about it, and the little outfit you’d thrown together seemed to do its job, a short summer skirt with a matching top– it was hot out in the Texan sun, and you wanted to make it hotter.

“We’ve been disturbin’ your beauty sleep, princess?” One of the men spoke up, and your eyes narrowed at his use of the pet name. His grin was too confident, hiding his laugh between his teeth. You set your eyes on him and gave him a pitying look.

“Yes, actually! It’s hard work looking this good, but you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?” you snapped back. A sound of snickering laughs from the men at their coworker’s expense could be heard through the yard, and you felt a saccharine smile cover your face.

“So, who’s in charge of all this noise anyway?” you asked, voice bored, when the laughter had died.

“You gotta take that up with Miller,” another one of the men replied, your first victim quickly forced into silence.

“And who’s that?”

The man nodded his head in the direction of the man you’d weaved into your web. He didn’t look impressed where he stood under the shade of the oak tree watching you. He had his arms crossed over his broad chest, the fabric stretching around his biceps, as he shook his head at you as you walked closer.

“Mr. Miller.” You couldn’t help the pleased smile spreading across your face.

Clasping your hands loosely behind your back as you pushed your chest out innocently, you slowly stepped closer, his jaw clenching tighter with each of your careful steps through the grass.

“We’ll try ‘nd keep the noise down f’ya until nine am, Miss, but after that we’ll need to use our bigger tools if ya want this done before the summer ends.” He kept his voice steady and professional, his southern drawl like soft silk in your ears. His eyes never left your face once, even with the deep neckline of your top.

Standing a little too close to him, to be considered appropriate for someone who you’d just met, your teeth caught on your bottom lip coquettishly. “Oh, I want you to use your big tool that’s for sure.” It sounded ridiculous, and you had to bite down harder to keep from bursting out laughing.

Joel didn’t seem to think it was funny. Something flickered in his gaze, before it hardened, eyes boring into yours as he asked you through his teeth, “Whatchu think your doin’, huh?”

You shrugged playfully with an exaggerated sigh, “I don’t know, Mr. Miller, isn’t it obvious?”

“Oh, ‘s obvious alright.” He shook his head in disbelief, and looked away for a beat, before his eyes found yours again.

“It’s so hot out this summer,” you continued your jest with a hooked finger along the hem of your shirt, tugging at it, “I just wanted something to cool down.”

He narrowed his eyes at you, “‘m sure you did.”

Continuing your game, you widened your eyes in an attempt at feigning innocence, “But I don’t mind breaking a sweat if need be.”

“’nd how do you like to break a sweat, princess?” he asked, putting pressure on the nick name his men had given you.

“Oh, I think you already know that, Mr. Miller.”

Joel’s eyes hardened as the flirty words fell from your lips. Shifting his weight from one leg to the other he raised a finger at you. “Listen’ up, brat,” he told you in a lowered voice, “Ain’t nothin’ more happenin’ between us, you understand? It’s inappropriate– you’re my employer and I don’t do that shit.”

It was almost too easy. Biting back a smile, your thoughts wandered back to the last time you’d had him like this; riled up, and willing to put you in your place. A slick wetness coated the gusset of your panties, already, at the thought.

“I understand, Daddy.”

With a sigh Joel turned away from you with a shake of his head, muttering under his breath, “You’re ridiculous.” 

You were, he was right. But it was so fun. 

A smirk tugged at your lips when he turned back to look at you. He wanted to say something, you could see it in the way he shifted his weight from one foot to the other, his hands fidgeting on his hip, but he changed his mind as he shook his head again. 

Victory had never tasted so sweet.

All week you’d played a game of cat and mouse with Joel. One day you’d ignored him completely as you flirted with the crew, exaggerating your laugh at jokes that weren’t even close to being funny, and touching too many sweaty biceps to count. Then the next you never left him alone, buzzing like a mosquito in his ear asking all kinds of silly questions, slipping in an innuendo or two, and teasing him for a reaction other than an annoyed grunt.

He’d have to break at some point. You could see it in his eyes. He might play the annoyance up, but there was a softness to the way he looked at you. It was there– you weren’t making that up!

The sound of the juicer buzzed in your ear as you chewed on your lip. Your hand rested lazily on the kitchen counter as you stole glances out the window as you waited. Pierre was quiet as he worked, only throwing a curious glance your way every once in a while, as he mixed together the jug of lemonade you’d requested.

The day had scorched since early morning, and you’d had no choice but to throw on your skimpiest bikini. A smile tugged at the corner of your mouth at the thought – well, there was more appropriate outfits for this heat, but you didn’t want that.

What you wanted, was to get your brains fucked out.

You’d played all your cards right, but nothing had seemed to make Joel simmer over with a need to put you in your place again. In the need for a new plan, you hoped showing off your body to all his men while serving them a nice cold glass of lemonade would do the trick, hoping he’d get jealous. The pool had already started to take shape, and your time was starting to run out.

“Here you go, ma belle,” Pierre slid a newly filled jug of ice-cold lemonade down towards you over the marble, “let me know if you need anything else, yes?”

Nodding your head in gratitude, you lifted the jug onto the tray you’d prepared, “Merci, Pierre.”

Slipping carefully through the sliding doors you made your way across the veranda to place the tray on the outdoor dining table. The tray was heavy, and you moved fast to make sure you didn’t spill the lemonade all over yourself.

“HEY BOYS!” you shouted over the sound of the heavy machinery, waving a lazy hand at them, beckoning them closer like a siren. “I hope you’re thirsty,” you laughed.

A low whistle could be heard as they came closer. Eyes lingering on your skin, trailing over your body as they gathered around the table, helping themselves to the citrus-y delight.

“If this ain’t the sweetest thing I think a client has ever done for us,” Tommy smiled as he helped himself to a glass, “You mind if I take a picture of this setup? To post on our Facebook page.”

You shook your head, “Take as many pictures as you like,” you told him, but your eyes wandered.

Joel had hung back, walking slower behind the rest of his crew, and was finally walking up the couple steps to the veranda. His work boots echoed over the planks as he walked closer. He didn’t seem happy as he locked eyes with you, his eyes quickly rolling over your almost naked body.

Taking advantage of the opportunity, you poured him a glass; the ice cubes splashing as you poured, cold drops splashing and coating the skin of your exposed chest. Joel pretended he didn’t notice, but you saw the way he looked at you. You’d seen that look so many times, eyes hungry and desperate for something they knew they couldn’t have, shouldn’t have. The only difference this time was that you’d let Joel do whatever he wanted to you.

“Here, Mr. Miller–”

Your voice was cut off by the sound of a phone ringing at the loudest volume. The suddenness of the sound made you jump, spilling the glass of Joel’s lemonade all down your hand and chest.

“Yellow,” you heard Tommy shout into his phone.

“Oh, oops,” you said, your voice laced in an innocent laugh. Drops of sticky lemonade ran down your body, darkening the fabric of your bikini, and making your skin shine with wetness under the Austin sun.

Looking up from your body at Joel, your teeth caught on your bottom lip at the way his jaw clenched, his eyes running down your body like they were drops of lemonade. You laughed again, sugary sweet as you made a show of placing the glass on the table, spreading your arms like you didn’t know what to do.

“Y’need to be more careful, sweetheart,” Joel mumbled as he fumbled for some napkins from your tray.

You shook your head at him when he handed them to you, instead you ran a finger up your chest, catching the drops and sucking the cool drink from your fingers, slowly, licking up every drop. It was bold, and you couldn’t contain your giggle when Joel’s eyes widened at you. It was quick, the wave of shock at how blatantly you’d flirt with him like this, before it crashed into the shore with a stern look. The other men had to be looking too, you could feel the way their eyes burned your skin, but you only cared about one man’s warm eyes on your body.

“That was so clumsy of me,” you giggled, the laugh forced and too sweet, but it didn’t matter, Joel didn’t buy it either way.

“’m sorry ‘bout that,” Tommy’s voice boomed, as he hung up the phone, “It was the missus– or soon to be missus.”

“Oh, you’re getting married?” you queried, the lemonade soaking you forgotten now that the moment had been ruined. Beside you, Joel picked up the glass you’d tried to hand him, drying the sides with the superfluous napkins.

“Yes, ma’am,” Tommy beamed, “tyin’ the knot this Saturday in fact.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful,” you smiled, an idea popping up in the back of your head, “Congratulations!”

“Thank you, thank you,” he beamed, taking a big gulp of the lemonade.

“So…” You stepped closer to Tommy, leaning your hand against the table. Joel’s eyes followed you, you could feel it, so you sneakily popped your hips out, giving him a nice view of your ass. “What’s the plan? Big church wedding?”

Tommy laughed, “Don’t know ‘bout big– we’re doin’ one of those barn weddings, you know? Out on a ranch and everythin’, they got it all on those big ranches nowadays.”

“Really?” you smiled, “Which ranch?”

“Oh, it ain’t far! Only ‘bout a fifteen-twenty minutes’ drive from downtown. Pecan Grove Ranch it’s called. They even got these nice cabins on site, for accommodation– which is nice for close family and those who’ve traveled far. You know, Maria’s family ain’t from Texas, so we got lots of folks flyin’ in.”

“Is that her name? Maria?” you asked. The way Tommy’s face lit up when you mentioned her name made your heart squeeze.

“Yeah,” he nodded, “love of my life she is!”

“I need to talk to you.” Joel cut your conversation off while his hand snaked its way around your upper arm, tugging you lightly towards him. When you turned your head to look at him, one eyebrow raised, his face shifted into a deep frown. “’s ‘bout the tiles,” he grumbled.

A smile tugged at the corners of your mouth. Finally.

You excused yourself to Tommy, and let Joel drag you with him. Throwing your head back you watched how the rest of the crew enjoyed their small break in the shade sipping on Pierre’s lemonade.

Joel crossed the yard in big steps, making a beeline for the shed tucked away in the back corner of the yard. He pulled at the door harshly, like it couldn’t happen fast enough, and pushed you inside. The door to the shed slammed shut behind him and covered you both in a cool darkness. Your eyes relaxed as you adjusted from the bright daylight to the dim lighting – the only light coming through a small window almost completely overgrown with climbing vines. Joel’s grip around your arm loosened as he pushed you deeper inside.

Taking small steps, you looked around, eyes scanning over the room as a thought of how you couldn’t remember the last time you’d stepped a foot inside the shed crossed your mind. It was hidden away in the corner of the garden, overgrown in a tasteful way, like how you’d see in garden magazines. These days the only person who used it was the gardener, if the miscellaneous tools and garden machines were to be believed.

“Put your hands on the table,” Joel ordered, his voice a low hum.

Outside you could still hear the shouts of his men, laughter, as they lounged about on their break. Every one of his men had seen you step into the shed together, and the thought sent an electric bubbling feeling straight to your cunt.

“Y'got cotton in those ears, girl? Put your hands on the table.”

A shiver traveled through your body, and you had to bite down on your lip to hold back your smile. Finally, finally, finally. With your back turned to him, you shook your head slowly, daring him to put you in your place again.

And Joel took the bait.

His rough hand slid over your waist as he stepped closer. He let it glide across your exposed skin, the dried lemonade sticky as he teased you. His rough hand slid upwards, hooking a finger under your bikini strap, slowly, pulling at it before he unhooked it, letting it fall to the concrete floor.

“Aren’t you gonna behave, princess?” he spat out the new nickname. “Didn’t I teach ya last time what happens when you ain’t a good girl f’me?” The low bass of his voice ghosted over your ear and had your blood buzzing under your skin.

His rough hands continued to explore you, gentle touches over your skin, getting you worked up, but never where you wanted his hands the most. When he pressed himself against you, letting you feel the hard shape of him through his work pants, you let your head fall against his shoulder with a content sigh.

“No, Daddy,” you shook your head.

Joel couldn’t hold back his groan at that word. The gentle hands who’d explored your body, tightened across your chest, pressing you tight into his chest as he bucked his hips harshly into your ass.

“I think I did,” he spoke into your ear, “broke that pretty brain on my cock, didn’t I, and now that greedy cunt wants more, ain’t that right? Can’t get enough of this big cock?”

A breathy gasp escaped you when he bucked his hips against you again, and you shook your head.

“That’s what I thought.”

The speed at which he moved almost gave you a whiplash. He pushed you against the table along the wall, your hands coming down to brace yourself as he pressed your chest down and put your ass, covered only by your skimpy bikini bottoms, on display for him.

“Such a slut for cock she can’t be a big girl and ask for it– no, princess, you’re so desperate for it, you make me come all the way to your rich daddy’s house, bring my crew and everythin’ just so I’ll fuck you again.”

Joel laughed and you couldn’t help but squeeze your thighs together. “That’s ‘nother level of desperate, ain’t it?”

You felt a heat spread across your face at his degradation, but it just turned you on more, and Joel knew it. He trailed a finger down between your cheeks, pressing down to feel how you’d soiled your bikini bottoms in your arousal.

“But that’s just what you are, aren’t you? A desperate whore dyin’ to get fucked?”

The hand between your legs vanished, and you braced yourself for a spanking, holding your breath as the excitement grew, but the slap of his rough hand never came. Instead, he unhooked a rope off the peg board in front of you.

You resisted a little when he grabbed your hands, slipping your hands from his grip playfully, your face turned to watch how his face grew sterner. The tired, disappointed sigh it earned you made you smile.

Gripping both your hands tightly, he crossed one wrist over the other before he tied them together at the small of your back, and you let it happen. Under your skin, the anticipation buzzed. With nothing to help you brace yourself, the hard surface of the table pressed harshly against your naked skin.

“Hey,” Joel’s voice was suddenly gentle as he cupped your face and turned you to face him, “you remember our rules?”

A small ache stung in your heart. Our.

You nodded, “I say ‘red’ or pinch you if I want you to stop.”

A pleased grin spread across his face as he tapped at your cheek gently, “That’s a good girl, baby.”

His hand slid down your body, from your face down your neck, from your neck over your shoulder, and then from your shoulder down your naked back. “How’s this?” he asked, hooking a finger under the rope, “Not too tight?”

You shook your head, or tried to, with the way your cheek was mushed against the table.

“Words, princess, need to hear ya say it f’me.”

The softness in his voice when the pet name left his lips, made a fluttering feeling bubble in your core, and it was hard to fight the grin from pulling at your lips.

“Am I your princess now?” you asked with fluttering eyelashes, “I thought I was your desperate slut?”

Behind you, you could hear Joel let out a deep sigh. A finger traced small circles over your ass, making goosebumps blossom over your skin, before it hooked into the band of your bikini bottoms, tugging them slowly down and exposing your wet cunt to him.

“You know,” Joel sighed again, pausing to let the sound of his fly being undone fill the space between you. You almost moaned at the sound, pushing your ass out, desperate for any kind of friction. “I was plannin’ on bein’ nice t’you, but now…”

The blunt head of him pressed against you, running it up and down your cunt, coating it in your slick arousal, and you almost held your breath. The anticipation like a fist around your chest. Your heart drummed in your chest, almost drowning out the wet slick sound between your legs.

“I don’t want you to be nice,” you almost whispered, your fist tightening around each other at the small of your back.

“I know, princess…” he whispered back, and pushed at your opening, “I know.”

He was too big, the girth of him splitting you in two on his cock. It burned deliciously, and you savored every inch he gave you until he was fully seated inside you. Only then were you able to whimper out a moan, your breath finally released.

His hands gripped your wrists like a handlebar, something to hold on to, something to guide you back and forth on his cock. He pushed himself even deeper, releasing a deep groan in your ear as he leaned over you, the weight of him heavenly as he made room for himself inside you, his heavy balls pressed against you.

This was what you’d wanted. Just to feel him again like this.

“Shit…” you sighed, eyes almost rolling back into your head.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” he whispered in your ear, “get a cock in you, and you turn into a good girl f’me.”

You wanted to push back, to give him something to prove him wrong, but you had nothing.

“Please,” you whispered, your eyes squeezed shut tightly.

“Please what, princess?” You could hear the smile in Joel’s low rumbling voice.

“Fuck me, sir,” you pleaded, “Fuck me, Daddy, please.”

“Oh, now she’s askin’ nice.” Joel pulled back and thrusted back inside in one hard thrust, pushing your body against the table, a line surely indented in your skin by now.

A whimper fell from your lips.

Joel started fucking you slowly, but hard, the table rattling with each thrust, one hand wrapped around your wrists to keep his balance. Under him you couldn’t fight back your moans, small content squeaks escaping you when he pressed himself firmly against your ass, burying his cock deeply inside you with every thrust.

“That’s it, slut, that’s a good girl,” Joel praised over you, “takin’ that cock so well, princess.”

The world started blurring around the edges with each thrust, a soft, warm feeling wrapping itself around your heart as he thrusted inside you. You were dying to touch your clit. His cock reached so far, pressing perfectly against your g-spot with each push. You were so close. If you could just touch your clit.

“P-please,” you mumbled lowly, your face scrunched tight as you clenched around his cock.

Joel grunted behind you and stepped away. You could almost cry, and maybe you did because rough pads ran over your cheek as he shushed you.

“No-no-no, it’s okay baby,” he mumbled, “calm down.”

“Please,” you tried again. Please let me come.

“I need you to do somethin’ f’me,” he told you as he guided his cock back to your ruined entrance, slick with want.

“I’ll do anything you ask,” you hurried.

“Anythin’?” Joel rubbed his cock up and down your slit as a slick sound filled the air.

“Anything.”

Behind you, Joel laughed, and pushed inside you again, making a big smile spread across your face.

“Alright, princess,” he said with a hard thrust, “what you’re gonna do f’me is when you feel like you’re close, you’re gonna tell me, tell your Daddy, alright?”

You nodded into the wood, head almost delirious with want, “Okay.”

“You wanna feel my cum inside you, don’t cha, want me to fill y’up to the brim?” His voice was so soft, almost soothing, as he fucked you hard.

“Please, Daddy, want you to come inside me, please.”

A grumbling laugh escaped Joel as he continued his harsh thrust – your skin clap clap clapping together as he hauled you towards the edge of your orgasm. It built deep in your core, coiling in on itself as he brought you closer and closer and closer.

“Joel,” you gasped, “I’m gonna come.”

Quickly, and without warning, Joel pulled out, leaving you trembling, and on the edge.

“No, you ain’t,” he told you sternly, “you’re gonna hold it.”

A rough hand smoothed over your right ass cheek, small taps to your skin reprimanding you as he rubbed his cock over the other, soiling you in your own desperation.

You felt like you were heaving for breath underneath him, eyes squeezed tight as you tried to stave it off.

“That’s it,” he praised, “that’s a good girl. Hold that orgasm f’me.”

Focusing on the way his hand rubbed over your skin, you tried to calm down and steady your breathing. It could’ve taken a minute or an hour, you didn’t know, but the feeling of falling over the edge of bliss fizzled out slowly. Joel leaned over your body, whispering praises into your ear, telling you how good you were for him. When you’d calmed down completely, you lifted your head to look at him, to catch his eyes.

Blown out and big, the warmth of them looked back, a deepness to get lost in. A small smiled tugged at his lips before he leaned down and peppered a soft kiss to your shoulder. It lasted only a second, but it made fluttering wings expand in your tummy.

When he pushed inside you again, your tied hands reached for his. His thrust came quicker than before, sloppier, as he chased his own high, his hand interlaced with yours.

“God fuckin’ slut,” he rambled.

“Takin’ that cock so fuckin’ good.”

“I’m gonna fuckin’ come– gonna fill that cunt up.”

With a hard slam of his hips against your ass, pushing himself as deep as he could, Joel came inside you with a deep grunt. “That’s it– take all that fuckin’ cum inside.” A warmth filled you from the inside as his cock twitch inside you, coating your walls in thick spurts of his cum.

“Good fuckin’ girl,” he mumbled, as he thrusted his cum back inside you, making sure he’d emptied himself completely before pulling out, sliding his softening cock from your denied cunt.

“Joel,” you whispered, but he didn’t hear you, too busy with tucking himself back into his work pants, and pulling up your bikini bottoms, soiling them in his cum starting to leak out of you.

“What about me?” you asked, confused, as he undid the rope around your wrists.

“What ‘bout you?” he repeated, helping you up and turning you to face him.

A chuckle rumbled in his chest as he took in your disappointed face, a large hand coming up to cup your chin. “What?” he teased, “don’t like your punishment?” He padded your cheek and pulled away, picking up your bikini top from the floor.

“’f you’re gonna act like a fuckin’ brat– havin’ your daddy hire me to have an excuse for seein’ me again, when you could’ve just called, then you’re gonna get treated like a brat, you understand? You gotta earn your orgasm, and you ain’t earned yourself nothin’ prancing around half naked in your garden while I’m trying to work, princess.” 

With that, Joel threw you your bikini top, and you barely managed to catch it between your fingers before you watched him walk out the shed, leaving you half naked, as his cum leaked down the inside of your leg.

part three -> here!

hopefully this was okay? please let me know what you thought of the new part! a comment telling me your favorite part is always welcome, and my ask box is always open to chat <3 and thank you for reading!!

© shellshocklove, 2024 i do not give any permission to repost, translate, feed to AI or redistribute any of my writing, with or without credit!

[nena-la-fresa]

All Night Long | Good Ending |

18+ Account | Minors DNI | Do NOT Follow, Like, or Comment | Pls have your age in your bio, if you do not I will automatically block you because I’ll assume you are a minor.

All Night Long | Neutral Ending | /// All Night Long | Bad Ending |

Pairing: Josh Washington x f! Reader

Warning: Flirting | Smut | Little bit of Voyeurism | P in V | Blowjob | Three way |

Word Count: 2551

Sometimes you still think about that night. You felt like Beth and Hannah were like sisters to you. You visited their house often for breakfast and dinner, so it really hurt what happened. You couldn’t even imagine how Josh felt. You still feel somewhat responsible, maybe if you hadn't been taking care of Josh that night things would have been different. 

They both knew you liked their brother. If anything they were the only ones who tried to get you together. They were the ones who set drunk Josh down on the same couch as you. You were so focused on playing with his hair and drawing lines on his face with your fingers. You even confused your feelings to him. You thought he heard you when he mumbled your name in his sleep. 

But then they went missing and Josh cut off you and everyone else. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t hurt but what else could you do. He was mourning. 

You were a little surprised though at the invite you got. But still happy, you really hoped that he was doing somewhat better. 

When you got there it was like he was the same Josh, he didn’t look like he was mourning. He acted the same way. He still made his same flirtatious comments. He was still that boy next door kind of guy. 

He had noticed that you got cold, so he walked over with a blanket. You were about to take it when he opened it and wrapped you with the blanket. You looked up at him, a bit corny but looking into his eyes just made you feel like kissing him. 

And you feel like he noticed too, why else would he clear his throat and walk away. You felt a little disappointed. But you thought it was a good time to talk to him. You sat down next to him while he was crouching trying to light the fire. You weren’t alone so you just spoke softly so only he could hear.

“I’m really sorry for what happened Josh. I really loved Hannah and Beth. I still miss going over to your house on Sundays and eating breakfast with you guys. I really regret that day too, I should have been with Hannah that day. But I was so focused on taking care of you that I just didn’t- I didn’t think about what could happen.”

You looked up and saw him looking at you. “Thank you. I appreciate that Y/n.” 

You were about to say something when Chris interrupted, “What am I missing?” 

You rolled your eyes before looking at Chris who was crouched coming in between the two of you. 

“Everything, we just had full blown sex right now. How'd you miss it?” Josh turned slightly to look at Chris. 

“Oh shit no way. Was it hot?” Chris patted Josh on the back. 

“Oh yeah dude. It was, you couldn’t tell? Dude had me cumming three times in the span of a minute. That guys, a real sex god.” They both looked at you bewildered, not uttering a word. 

“Okay, guess I can’t joke around. I’ll leave you ladies to it. I’m going to sit on the couch where it's less awkward.” You got up and moved over to where Ashely was. 

Chris moved to where you had been sitting, “So uh, you and uh, you and her?” He nodded towards you. 

“What about me and her?” Josh continued to try and get the fire going. 

“You finally gonna ask her out?” Chris whispers, “Cuz if you don’t I might just have to. I mean have you seen that ass? Just thinking about it makes me wet. Picture it, her ass up in the air while you're pounding into her and it has her screaming your name.” 

Josh glares over at Chris. Chris laughs, “Just saying the same shit you did buddy. But seriously, I think you should finally go for it. She definitely wants you to.”

You slowly stopped talking when you heard Sam yell about there not being any hot water. Josh got up and was about to head to the basement. 

“Go.” Ashley whispered, but seeing that you didn’t get up she yelled. “Josh, do you need help? Cuz Y/n could definitely help you if you needed help.” 

Josh turned around, “Yeah I could use some help. It’s definitely a two man job.” 

“Alright well if you need me that bad I guess I’ll go.” 

You both stood at the entrance of the basement. “Oh fuck no. I’m not going down there.” 

You didn’t budge, “What you scared?” Josh smirked. 

“Yes actually. Haven’t you ever seen scary movies Josh. People die in basements. There are ghosts and shit down there, psycho’s who are waiting for people to have sex.” 

“You tryin to have sex?” He raised an eyebrow.. 

You glare at him, “Sure buddy. Let’s have sex all you want.” 

He pumps his fist, “Yes.” He sees that you still aren't moving. 

“Alright. Here.” He holds out his arm for you. 

“Come on. Just hold onto me.” You hesitated, “Trust me, if there was anything in there I’d protect you.” 

“Okay.” You wrapped your arm around his, pulling him close. He could feel your breast pressed up against his arm. 

He’d be lying if he said it didn’t get him a little hard. 

After watching Josh fix the boiler he asks for your help. “Alright turn that switch there.”

“Right here?” 

“Yeah.”

You turn the switch on and the boiler starts working. 

“Yes! High five girl!” 

“What are we kids?” You laugh but still give him a high five. 

“Nah cuz if we were kids you wouldn't have said what you did upstairs.” You could hear the flirtation in his voice. 

You could feel your face heat up. “Okay. Let’s just forget about it” You start to walk away but hear a loud sound that scared you. “What was that?” 

You backed up into Josh, the warmth that was radiating off of his chest had you melting. His hands landed on your hips keeping you close. You felt him lean down and talk in your ear. 

“That could be a lot of things. But what I’m focused on is the fact you called me a what was it again? A sex god?” 

You shifted a bit in his grasp, an exhale left his breath. “Don’t do that.” His voice barely above a whisper. 

You felt something boil up from inside you. Something about him whispering in your ear got to you. “Do what? Oh this?” You rubbed your ass against him. 

“Fuck.” Josh gripped your waist tighter. 

“What can’t flirt back.” You felt him start to rub himself against your ass. 

One of his hands shifted from your hip to your pants. He wasted no time slipping his hand down them. His cold hand against your slit was such a sensation. His fingers went past your folds and slipped inside. “Fuck.” You whispered. 

You were at a loss of words as he pumped his fingers in and out slowly. He used his other hand to move your hair out of the way so that he could suck on your neck. His hand going back to your hip to hold you in place. 

“What was that about flirting back?” He felt you tighten around his fingers. 

“Josh please.” 

“Please what?” 

“I need you.” He took his fingers out. Leaving you feeling empty. 

“Need me where.” He put his fingers in his mouth, “God you taste so good.” 

“In me. I need you in me please.” He got right to it. He took off your clothes and his. You could feel his hard dick against your ass. 

He pushed you against the way so that you could lean forward. His dick rubbing against your folds. You could feel his arousal. 

Your once empty hole felt full, the girth and length that this man had. He started out slow. But he picked up the pace. One hand on your hip and the other against your clit. 

“Your pussy feels so good.” He whispered to you. He stopped for a bit before putting you on all fours. Your face pressed against the blanket he gave you earlier. His hands on your waist, gripping them tight enough to leave a bruise. And the feeling of his dick reaching places you wouldn't have felt while being pushed up against the wall. 

Josh's pace starts to pick up. He starts hitting all the right places and it causes you to scream. 

Unbeknownst to you both but there was someone watching. Chris was getting ready to scare you both with the first sound but when you both didn’t go investigating he got closer. That was when he saw you two. He was watching as you were grinding on Josh, and the way Josh started fingering you. He felt himself get hard. He knows he shouldn't have. He had a crush on Ashley. But what he told Josh earlier wasn't that much of a lie. He did think you were hot, especially in high school. Even when Josh dropped out he’d still see you around campus, he always wanted to talk to you. Always wanted to have sex with you. He fantasized about it a lot. 

And now here he is. Watching behind a shelf, with his dick out stroking himself to the sight of his best friend fuck the girl he thought was hot. He could feel himself getting closer to cumming when something fell. 

You both looked up in the direction of the noise. Chris’s face was now visible to you both. “Uh. I heard someone scream.” 

Josh didn’t stop though, the room filled with the sound of skin hitting against one another.  If anything Christ standing and just watching made Josh thrust even harder, like he was trying to claim his dominance. Especially with what Chris was saying earlier. 

You’ve never thought of Chris in that way but being watched did something to you. “Josh” you moaned his name and felt yourself squeezing around his dick. 

“You just gonna stand there Cochise? Cuz it looks like our girl here is getting excited from being watched. I know you haven't gotten your dick sucked. Why don’t you let her get it wet. But don’t expect it again. It’s a one-time offer Cochise.” Josh watched as Chris hesitated. 

“Or you could go back upstairs and not get any from Ashley. Cuz I know you both wont put out.”

In a rush Chris keeps the robe on but gets down on his knees. You prop yourself up but grab his hard dick. You lick the tip before looking up at him and putting it in your mouth. 

“Fuck” Chris lens his head back and grabs a fist full of hair. 

“She’s good isn't she Cochise.” Josh kept ramming into you, saliva dripping down your chin from Chris, dick in your mouth. 

“She's better with her mouth around you. So why don’t I give you a turn and you give me a turn.” 

Anger built up in Josh, “Fuck no.” Josh grabbed your arms and pulled you back up. 

“I have an idea. I don’t think you’ll like it though.” You let Josh slip out of you. You turned around, your lips hovering over his lips. “But I really want to try it. And then after I’m all yours.” 

Josh nodded, you told Chris to lay down. You made Josh watch as you sank down on Chris’ dick. You bounced on it a few times before leaning back against Chris’ chest. 

“You just want me to watch you fuck another guy?”

“No. Just come here.” You wrapped your mouth against his dick and got it wet. You sucked on the tip before pulling back, “I want you to go in.” 

“I’m sorry what?” Chris showed hesitation. 

“Chris please. Come on, don't ever tell me that you two horn dogs never thought about a girl with two dicks in her.” 

Josh smirked at you, “Wow, you’re really taking that party like porn stars seriously.” 

“You said it yourself, ‘it’s a one-time offer.’” 

Josh wasted no time. He leaned you back against Chris. Chris held your waist with one hand and the other hand its way to your breast. You moaned feeling Josh spit on your pussy and his dick. He pushed his dick against your entrance, stretching it and pressing it against Chris’. 

“Fuck” You gasped at the feeling of being filled to the brim. 

Josh starts to thrust, your pussy dripping from arousal makes it easy for them both to move inside you. You could feel yourself coming closer. Your eyes started to water, you felt that tingling sensation on your nose. They could feel you tighten around them. 

Chris pulled out and began to jerk himself off. But Josh kept going even if you began to get overstimulated. He kept fucking you while you were still on top of Chris, he just slightly lifted you to not disturb Chris letting it lose. 

You could feel Josh getting closer. His thrust were erratic, his breathing was heavy. He kept whispering your name until he came inside of you. 

Josh leaned down and kissed you. 

You all stayed there for a moment to catch a breath. That was before Chris got up after cleaning himself. “So uh, we don’t tell Ashely or anyone right?” 

“Right.” You laughed as Josh helped you put on your clothes. 

“And it was a one time thing Chris.” Josh turned around after he finished buttoning his pants. 

“Right right. I get it.” 

You all ended up going back up stairs together. Ashley got up from the couch “What took you guys so long.” She paused before seeing Chris robe. “What in god's name are you wearing?” 

Chris did the Trinity on Ashley, “I found my true calling.” 

“Pretty ironic huh.” Josh whispered over to you, you stiffened a laugh before elbowing him lightly. 

“Please tell me you're going to take a vow of silence.” Ashley joked.

“He better.” Josh spoke a little louder, confusing Ashley a bit. 

After you nudged Josh again he turned to you. “And you. What am I going to do with you?” 

You smirked at him, “With me? I did nothing.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah.” 

“I guess we just gotta go for round two huh.” Josh grabbed your wrist lightly trying to lead you. 

“Oh you mean round two with you know who?” You could see that he got irritated for a second. 

“Yeah sure okay.” Josh leaned down before holding your legs and throwing you over his shoulder. 

“Where are you two going?” Ashley laughed at the two of you. 

Josh started to walk up the stairs, “I gotta talk with her about some stuff. You two have fun down here.”

“Damn that basement really did something for them huh.” She laughed and looked at Chris. Who weirdly looked irritated. 

“Chris?” 

He snapped out of it. “Oh, yeah. It really did. Some kinda trauma bonding or something from the scare I gave them.” 

“Where did you even find that?” Ashley listened to Chris all the weird shit that he found in the basement. Excluding the sex and him watching you and Josh fuck before he joined in.

[hamilando]

ੈ✩ my muse (smau) ੈ✩

pairing : max verstappen x fem reader

summary : the chaotic private account of an artistic soul 💫

tw : fluff, a little chaos, suggestive

a/n : So this was requested anonymously, so if you are seeing this, Hope you like it 💫

·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ

liked by max1, lordperceval, albono, lilihye, alexamiuex, and 37 others

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liked by max1, albono, hamwich, fransisca.gnomes and 28 others

maxwife the muse and the art 💫

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[adancingalien]

𝕯𝖊𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

Benjicot/Davos Blackwood x bracken!reader

summary: after learning of your impending betrothal to another, you and Benji make a plan to stop it

warning: smut 18+ no use of y/n this fic revolves around pregnancy and has some light breeding kinks towards the end. the reader in this is able to get pregnant and is described as a woman.

word count: 3.9k

note: its finally here! i've really enjoyed writing this fic, its been a while since written one and i've never written smut so if its not the best sorry lol. thank you for everyone's support! i hope you guys like it <3 next time I post it will be on this account @dancingaliensfics so if you like this follow that account. also a couple people asked me to tag them so here you go x @alifeinspiredd @gotranting

It's Early in the morning when your father gives you the news. The sun had risen only an hour prior, the days growing short as winter approached, and your mother sat across from you. 

Marriage.

You spend some time considering the thought whilst eating your porridge. In any other case, it would have been good news. The list your father had created so far was filled with well-suited men. You recognised some, two Bracken cousins you knew well, a Mallister boy you’d met at a tourney. They were all reasonable ages, only one was older than thirty and he seemed to be an afterthought. Your father assured you that he'd consider your opinion in his choice. 

Truthly you were lucky, if it was a year earlier you'd be excited. But the one name you wanted, the only man you would ever consider marrying, wasn't on the list and never would be.

Benjicot Blackwood.

Heir to Raventree Hall, the seat of your enemy house, the man who'd captured your heart 10 moons ago.

And so you sit in silence, eyes distant, as your father speaks to you of balls and meetings and gifts. Your mother watches you quietly, although what goes through her mind you cannot say. Eventually, the conversation fades to noise as you watch the last streaks of pink fade from the sky. 

You meet with Benjicot in the same spot you always do. A field of clover and wildflowers, sheltered from the gaze of Stone Hedge by a small patch of woodland. He brings you a bouquet of dandelions, dittander and hedge bindweed he picked himself along the path. Every time you meet he brings you one and each time he hands it to you with that grin before hiding his face in your neck. You love it, and after all this time you still feel your heart flutter at the sight, no matter how torn and pathetic the blooms themselves usually are. 

Gods, you love him. And you're certain you'll never love anyone else the same. Still, you hope he hasn't found the bindweed from near your gardens, it's beautiful but so quickly consumes all other plants.

He flops onto the grass and then beckons for you to do the same. Benji wraps his arms around your side and you lean your head on his chest as he begins to tell you about some skirmish at the hedge stones.

“Those Brackens think they can do whatever they please whenever they choose. You’d think they'd have learnt their lesson after the beating we gave them last time.”

As he speaks you pluck at blades of grass beside you, tearing the seeds from the stem. He often forgets your heritage, as you do his, and the reminder makes you anxious.

“Still,” you mutter, “I wish you wouldn't rush so quickly into battle.”

Benji turns his head to look down at you and you feel his breath on your face. He pauses for a few moments, watching you closely before responding.

“You needn't worry, dove, I can hold my own, especially against some Bracken bastards.” His words are harsh and said with a grin but you can feel the sentiment behind them. Still, his answer doesn't satisfy you.

“You're not the only person I stand to lose in a battle.”

The two of you tend to speak little of the different sides you sit on, choosing instead to focus on your shared qualities. But since your father's announcement that morning, you find your heritage is all you can think of.

His hands tighten on your side and he begins to shift in the way he often does when unsettled. “Tell your bracken brethren to stay on their side of the lines then.”

“Yes because it is such a simple thing, to announce our ties to my whole family!” You turn from him with a huff pulling hard on the piece of grass in your grasp. You regret your words immediately but find yourself unwilling to apologise.

Benji pulls his brows tight, running his fingers over the hem of your skirt. He looks like a scolded dog, his face sullen and eyes moving quickly.

“I’m sorry.” He looks at you softly for a moment. “Will you tell me what's bothering you love? You've been down all day.”

You pause for a while, having pulled away all the grass in your little patch, leaving your fingernails stained green.

“My father gave me news.” You lift your head to look at Benji, his eyes watching you closely. “He's finding me a husband.”

“No.” The response comes quickly and with strong conviction.

Baffled by his response, your brows furrow. “What do you mean no?”

“I simply won't let it happen. You're mine and I'm yours and we were destined to be together, I know it. You will not be with anyone else.”

You pull a pained face, turning away from him. How can he say that with such certainty? That he simply won't let your father marry you off as though it's such a simple thing. It's both endearing and irritating.

“It's not so simple you know.” You look out at the setting sun as you speak, “I've been trying to think of ways to avoid it but truthfully, I have nothing to complain about. What can I say to stop it? I've spent so long thinking of options but nothing seems right.”

Benji takes hold of your hands, gazing at you with such intensity it catches you off guard.

“We'll run away together, you and me, right now.”

Your eyes widen and you stumble on your thoughts. What an idea. It's a pleasant thought really and part of you is compelled to accept, to leap up and run away with Benji in that moment. But it is not this part of you that speaks.

“What- Benji- I cannot, we cannot! Where would we even go.”

“Essos, the free cities, the North, gods I'd go to the Iron Islands if it meant I could marry you. Anywhere in the world where the names bracken and blackwood mean nothing.” your heart skips at the thought, that Benjicot Blackwood would abandon his title and land and family to be with you. Travel to an unknown land and begin again. It's a feeling that quickly spreads through your body leaving you warm and filled with a joy so strong it again compels you to accept and leave in that moment.

You run your fingers over his knuckles, feeling the healed cuts and scrapes that cover them. You consider your own family, of your mother, sat at her window, waiting for you to return home. Your father, sending out his men to fruitlessly search across all of Westeros for his beloved daughter. 

“I can't Benji.”

“Then we'll go in a few days instead, you can pack your things, and I'll think of a plan of where to go-”

“No Benji.” you look into his eyes. You see in them a future and a path you cannot take at this moment. “I couldn't do that to my family, couldn't leave them forever and you couldn't either. It would break your mother's heart.”

Your words sour his mood and he visibly shrinks. You take his hands fully in your own and reach over to kiss him softly on the cheek. You can feel slight stubble and realise he must have rushed out after receiving your letter. How you love this man. 

It isn’t long before you see a new thought arrive in his mind and it's clear he does no further thinking before sharing it.

“I'll just take you then!”

Truthly, your expectations were not high but you still find yourself floored by the stupidity of his ‘plan’.

“What.” You can simply find no other words.

Benji turns to face you fully, squeezing your hands tightly. He has a crazed look on his face and you wonder if this is what your Bracken brethren see on the battlefield. 

“Listen, I’ll simply take you with me to Raventree Hall and we will wed there.” He must notice your unimpressed look as he quickly continues. “That way you don't have to go too far and your family will know you're safe. Sure it'll take some time for those Bracken curs to accept it but eventually they'll have to and then you can see them when you please.”

“Safe? Benji, you've come up with some terrible ideas but this is a new level. It would be war! You really believe that my father, that any bracken would simply accept a blackwood taking their daughter in the night?”

“Then war it would be. I'd kill a thousand men to keep you.”

“A thousand of my men, my blood! Yes, what a beautiful honeymoon it would be, setting the funeral piers of my family.”

He falls silent at this and looks down at his hands. You can see him thinking but he has the sense to keep his thoughts to himself. After a few minutes, you sigh and take his hands back in yours, having dropped them at some point during your rant. Leaning over, you capture his lips in your own for just a moment and when you pull away he follows after you.

“Just… leave it to me. I shall think of a plan for us. We can keep yours as a last resort, yes?”

He brightens at this, happy to trust in your judgement. He agrees quickly before closing the small space between you.

It's a week later when you send a raven summoning Benji. As a child, you had discovered passages within Stone Hedge which had long been forgotten and often used them to pass in and out of the castle. Now you and Benji used them to visit each other in secret. It's a few days before he is able to make his way to Stone Hedge, having been corralled by his father into some dull political nonsense you couldn't care less about. By the time he makes it to you, slipping into your chambers using the passage hidden behind large tapestries, you feel truly desperate for him.

It's overwhelming really, how much you love him. Your entire body aches for him, your mind thinks of him at all times. The thought of marrying another leaves you ill and to imagine laying with a man that isn't Benji is truly mad. He knows you in ways no other has, and, if you get your way, never will. So really it's not a surprise that upon seeing you waste no time in pressing yourself to him. As your lips meet you can feel all the stress of the past days leave your mind and you quickly forget what it was you summoned him for. It seems Benji has found himself in a similar position to you as his hands begin to explore your body through your evening gown. His soft touch turns rough as you run your fingers through the coarse strands of his hair. 

You pull away, moving toward to settee. He trails after, lounging next to you with his around your shoulders, fingers toying with your hair.

“I’ve had much time to think,” you say hands resting on your lap. “And I believe I've thought of a solution. It’s mad truly, but it is the best chance we have. I am certain I want it but if you do not you must say and that will be final. It is not a decision to take lightly.”

At your serious tone, Benji straightens and looks at you fully. You are nervous, such a proposal is hardly made easily and yet you feel certain in your bones that he will accept. You know he loves you, there is no doubt about it. You only wonder if he is truly ready for a life together.

“I would do anything to be with you, dove. Tell me and it'll be done.”

You sigh at his words, both from frustration and adoration. 

“Do not say such things before you hear the proposal.”

“Then tell me it so that I may say them with informed certainty.”

You look him in the eyes then, struggling to find a way to say what you mean.

“I would have your child.”

Benji pauses at this, and you can see confusion in his eyes before he speaks.

“Yes. when we wed we shall have many children, as many as you wish.”

“No Benji,” you squeeze his hands tightly and push yourself to speak. “My father will never choose you as my husband so we must give him no choice. If I was with child, with your child, he would have to accept a marriage or risk shame upon myself and our house. I know my father well and I am sure he would choose my happiness over tradition.”

At this, Benjicot stops and his face falls blank. It's as if his mind is —- and you wait patiently for his response.

“It is…” he stops and then restarts “I would love nothing more than to have a child with you. It is something I have dreamt of and I truly believe myself ready for such responsibility. I do not doubt the longevity of my love for you. So please do not think it is commitment with gives me pause. It is just…” he begins to play with your fingers, nervous energy flowing through him. He stands quickly, releasing your hands though you are used to his restlessness and simply wait for him to return. He paces in a small circle, running his hand through his hair and then returns to his seat. 

“I would not do that to you,” he says finally. You look at him in surprise, his answer seeming nonsensical to you.

“You have done it to me many times.”

“No not that,” he says quickly, covering his face in his hands as he thinks again how to phrase what he means.

“I wouldn't put you through such treatment! As an unwed woman to father a child by you. No, I couldn't dishonour you like that.”

“Dishonour me? Benji, you have dishonoured me more times than I could count. By simply being here in this room you dishonour me. We have laid together, many times. If this was a concern of yours, you should have voiced it long ago.” your words are tinged with amusement.

Benjicot stands again, moving his arms wildly. 

“And what of how you would be treated? Not just by your parents but every member of the court, the servants, anyone who knew of it. You would be shamed and shunned by others.”

“You think I care what others say of me?”

“I think you will care when it happens.”

“Do not make assumptions on my behalf. I am my own woman, I can make my own choices. And I do not need you, Benjicot Blackwood, to decide such things for me.” 

You pause, breathing deeply in an attempt to remove the heat from your voice. It isn’t your intention to force Benji to do this with you and you fear if you continue to argue your meaning will be lost.

“If your reasons to not go forth are your own, because you do not feel ready or because you do not want to, then that is fine and I will accept it.”

Your attempt to calm the situation backfires miserably and your words light a fire inside of Benji.

“Of course not, didn’t say I would marry you in that field? That I would give up everything to be with you. Do not doubt my love.”

“I do not doubt it, Benji. But if you are willing to give up your titles and home, go through battle and fight hundreds to have me, why can't you trust that I would endure the shame of a pregnancy outside of wedlock for you?”

At last, Benji returns to his spot next to you. He looks into the fire but his gaze is distant.

“I can protect you from danger, from enemies. I can kill any man that threatens you. I can stand with you in fire and pain. But I can’t save you from cruel words and shame. This is… it's something you’ll have to bear alone. And I hate the thought of it.”

At last, you understand his meaning. Benjicot Blackwood is not a man who often loses control. He is fierce and strong and can slay any man who comes in his path. 

“I am strong. And I can protect myself, just this once. And you will be stood with, at my side, to give me strength when I fail.”

“I know, I just fear you aren’t ready.”

“I am ready.”

A coy smile spreads across your face.

“Let me convince you.” 

At that you kiss him, one hand placed on his cheek and the other on his chest. He quickly reciprocates and you move closer until you can throw one leg over his lap. His hands find your hair, attempting to undo your intricate braids before pulling away in frustration and glaring at the strands. You laugh lightly, moving to remove your pins as he reaches for your neck, leaving a firm bite before his tongue lathes over the area. His ministrations pull a soft moan from your mouth and as he lifts your skirts to run his hand up the soft skin of your thigh, your hair is released.

His other hand quickly finds its way into your hair, fingers weaving into the strands before your head is pulled back allowing better access to your neck. As Benji continues trailing kisses across your neck and chest, you begin to move yourself on his lap, grinding against him as you feel his cock harden beneath his breeches. How you long to feel him inside you, and the thought of him staying even as he reached his peak, seed spilling inside you, has you moving with increased vigour. Benji begins to let out his quiet groans and pants to match your soft moaning and it's not long before he has your behind held firmly in his grip. 

His mouth reaches the neckline of your dresses and begins to suck marks onto your skin while you fumble with the fastening of your gown. Once the bodice is undone and the stays are loosened, he pulls them down, taking your breasts into his hands. His mouth quickly latches onto one of your peaks and his tongue swirls around them. He shows you no mercy in his actions, hands pressing so tight they are sure to leave bruises. Benji moves his hand to your core, fingers covering themselves in your wetness before pressing against your clit. They move quickly, circling your bud for some time before travelling towards your hole. His thumb moves to take its place, pressing firmly against you as it rubs. His fingers prod gently at your hole, before one slips inside. He stays like this, easing his finger inside of you until you're ready to take another. His fingers move inside of you for a few minutes, your walls clenching around them as they stroke, before they increase in speed, beginning to curl deep inside of you. Benji continues to assault your chest, relishing in the moans and whines he pulls from your lips. 

It isn't long, however, before he pulls away from your chest to speak.

“I need you, my love.” he lifts your chin so that your eyes meet. You lean forward and kiss him, giving your answer through your actions. He removes his fingers from you, wiping them on your dress much to your disgust before standing, holding you with his hands beneath your ass and your legs around his waist.

 He moves quickly towards the bed and, though he's strong, you can see him focusing on not dropping you. You take the chance to join your lips to his neck, leaving your marks there. Although you know him to be faithful to you, you can’t stand the thought of any Blackwood whore making a pass at him and the hickeys serve to claim him as yours. Gods, you think, you must stop thinking in such ways, you’ll be a Blackwood yourself soon. The thought leaves you giddy and you grin at his neck. Benji drops you rather unceremoniously onto the bed before staring at you with a bemused look on his face.

“What you grinning about him?”

“Just the thought that I will soon be your wife.”

His grin widens at that and he leans down to capture your lips once again. 

“Yes, my wife and I'll be your husband.”

You kiss him again, biting his lip and tugging on it slightly.

“All mine.” your words pull a deep moan from him.

It isn’t long before both of you have stripped completely and you find yourself lying back on the sheets, Benji between your legs. He moves quickly above you, rubbing his cock against your folds, the head catching perfectly on your clit with every stroke. You moan wantonly, fingers reaching up to pull Benji towards your lips by the hair. Your firm grip causes him to groan deeply into your mouth and his movements increase in speed. It isn't long though before you pull away.

“Benji, darling, I need you inside of me please.”

You're expecting him to tease you, and make a joke about your begging and neediness but instead, he lets out a long breath, before reaching down and taking himself in hand. He runs the tip of his cock along your wetness once more before pressing inside of you. Your body accepts him eagerly and it isn't long before he fills you. How could you ever marry another when even your body is moulded perfectly to him? The sounds of your pleasure harmonise as Benji begins to move inside of you. His thrusts are fast and deep as always, his hips snapping against yours with every thrust. You feel your mind slipping as your sounds increase in volume. Your hands roam his whole body. Filthy words spill from your lips.

“Benji please my love- ah- I must have you. Please”

“You have me sweet one, you have me.”

You pull roughly on his hair at his words.

“No I must have all of you, please I need your seed. I want you to cum inside me.”

His hips stutter before his thrusts continue with increased fervour.

“Fill me please Benji, it will feel so good.”

Benji lays his head in the crook of your neck moaning without restraint. You feel yourself reaching your peak quickly and want him to cum with you. You lift your legs and wrap them tightly around his waist, moaning, turning to shrieks.

“I love you so much Benji,” you cry out, fingernails leaving scratches down his back. “I love you and I want your baby, please cum inside me.”

At your words, Benji lets out a choked sound, hips pressing firm against you, and feels the warmth of his release spill inside of you, pulling you to your peak alongside him. Your eyes squeeze shut, but if they hadn’t you would have seen the most delightful look on Benji’s face and he finished inside of you. It takes some time for his cock to stop twitching and even longer for the both of you to come back to the world of the living. Benji begins to lift himself off of you, but you tighten your legs.

“Stay.”

A simple command that he follows without question.

[blissfullyecho]

My 2025 Resolutions List

Pre-New Years Resolutions (Nov/Dec 2024)

MY TIP: I think it’s important to establish pre-new year resolutions to get the momentum going for the new year. The best way to go about it is to look at your NY resolutions first, then see what you can do beforehand to prepare and those would be your Pre-New Years Resolutions

1. Prioritize Health + Fitness: Commit to a consistent fitness routine that enhances my body and confidence. I’m going to achieve this by attending 4-5 fitness sessions per week, stay disciplined with a healthy eating plan (with holiday plate exceptions), and setting physical milestones (like weighing X amount of lbs by 1/1/25)

2. Personal Branding Solid Foundation: Get clear on what personal brand I’d like to create for myself and indulge heavily in content and experiences that embody this ideal image I have for myself. I’ll achieve this by constantly checking in with myself by asking “is this on-brand with who I’d like to become?”

3. Build my Luxury Sales Career: ***For the record, I’m in luxury real estate (I’m licensed in 2 states) and international yacht sales.*** I’d like to grow on social media with my business accounts and reach my accounts to 400,000 across all of my BUSINESS platforms (right now I have a little over 350,000 followers)

2025 New Years Resolutions

1. Keep every promise I make to myself if it’s going to benefit me. I’ll make changes if something better comes along

2. Start taking reformer Pilates on a more regular basis

3. Get my desired hair length without extensions

4. Get back into coed stunting/tumbling (I was a cheerleader all my life and still love it in my 20s)

5. No more blackout nights when I drink (embarrassing but I’m such a lightweight)

6. Get back down to 110-115lbs

7. Start dating again, but dating guys that actually meet my standards and not settling because I’m bored or feeling lonely

8. Make the most $ I’ve ever made annually

9. Start fresh with my personal social media and keep my IG followers to under 10,000 (for those of you who don’t know or are new, my personal TikTok has over 1M followers and my IG is close to 800K). The issue is that I have more male followers than I do women and I want to change my IG to friends/family/acquantances/brands/women. I don’t even get paid all that much on IG anymore but TikTok I do so that’ll stay.

10. Break the habit of buying a sweet treat every single day

11. Lower my A1C to under 4.8 (it’s at 5.0 rn)

12. Practice buying quality, no matter the price point. I should be able to afford what I want if I hit my annual income goal.

13. Move to (a different city local to me) in downtown and live at (one of the new high rises they are building)

14. Become more photogenic without nitpicking every single thing about me with each picture I take— this also goes hand in hand with no longer using filters on my photos or making any changes

15. Renew my passport (I’ve been extremely lazy to do so) and travel more. My goal is to travel at least 3 times AT LEAST out of state, preferably out of country if time/work allows

16. Get close with God again. He is the only reason I got to where I am today and then I fell off.

17. Prioritize in taking care of myself and treating myself like a princess. I should always be checking in with myself by asking “is this on-brand with who I’m becoming?” and act accordingly.

18. Start going out more— go to more events, dinners, say yes to invites more, date. I’d like to increase my social calendar to at least once a week. By the end of the year, I’d like to be social at least 3-4x per week.

19. Reset my gut health and actually feel like I’m in my 20s and not in my 90s

20. Become completely unbothered and know when to emotionally detach (or avoid attachment altogether— seriously)

21. Stop oversharing… being exclusive with information about me/my life

22. Don’t dream big, but dream bigger

23. Stop being so trusting and forgiving— HUGE lesson I learned in 2024.

I’m sure I’ll be adding to this list. But any personal posts regarding my own rebrand and level up will be under the hashtag on my blog #2025. I will constantly be updating from now until the end of 2025.

[wasitforrevenge]

oh sweetheart pt 3

pairing: boxer!ellie x f! jesses sister!reader

word count: 5.4k!!! longest part yet yay

rating: 18+ (smut will be coming in later parts)

warnings: dealer! boxer!ellie, weed, alcohol, boxing, kissing, joel is dead in this, talk of abusive relationship, smoking, they’re drunk but eveything is consensual ofc! lmk if im missing anything

summary: you and ellie share a moment and both of you admit it :)

author notes: hi everyone thank you for all the love on this series <<<333 this is a good one! not all the way edited yet but i wanted to post cause i finished it 20 minutes ago! sorry for the wait but i think maybe some smut in the near future ;) requests are open and id love any feedback. thank you for 200 followers and over almost 2000 likes!! this is unbelievable and im so grateful! pls let me know if u want to be added to the taglist!!!

part 3 | part 4

series masterlist | main masterlist

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸

READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.

DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.

finally friday is here, it feels like you’ve been counting the minutes until you see her again. you woke up around eleven am and put water in the kettle to make yourself some tea as you went to the bathroom to get your morning routine done, paramore playing over your speaker in the bathroom. your routine is something you’ve started to build since you moved to try and keep your anxiety at bay, not all the time it works but its a good way to get your day started. you started with washing your face, brushing your teeth, then brushing the bedhead out of the mess you call hair.

a couple minutes later, you hear the kettle hiss and you make your way back to the kitchen and turn off the stove. you picked your favorite mug out of your cabinet and make your tea. leaving the kitchen, you went back to sit on the couch and think about a million different outcomes that would possibly happen tonight when you see her. you wonder if you’re reading too much into the way she talked to you, was she even flirting with you at all? or just being nice? did she just feel bad about seeing what happened outside her gym?

your phone buzzed in the mist of your thoughts on your and you read a text from dina telling you they’re leaving for the gym around 7 and if you wanted a ride. before responding you pulled up the weather app on your phone and decided you could walk there, its a warm summer day out again and by the time the sun fell, it would be cool enough to walk and it was only about 15 minutes from your house, that and leaving open the possibility that she would want to drive you home again.

you texted her back saying that you would just meet them there. you looked at the time seeing its about eleven thirty so you still have a while until you have to leave. you decided you were gonna be productive today. you did laundry and washed your sheets, did the dishes, vacuumed, cleaned the bathroom and made a sandwich for lunch even thought by now it was 4 o clock. as you were walking around your apartment, you made a mental note to try and find some nice thrift stores around to help you decorate your place. you made your way to your bathroom to shower for tonight.

you love taking long showers, its your guilty pleasure. thanking god that your landlord pays your water bill as you dried off from the shower, put on your strawberry lotion, a big black t-shirt and fuzzy socks to hang around in while you did your hair and minimal makeup. you couldn’t stop thinking about seeing her tonight. new girl was playing on the tv in your room as you finished the final touches on your face. doing light everything since its hot but still wanting to look nice for the occasion: finally seeing her again.

four episodes later and its 6 o clock so you change into a pair of black levi shorts and a green top. your hair and makeup still looked good from earlier so nothing to touch up but you still triple checked yourself. you wish you could have smoked today to help beat the nerves but you wouldn’t have anything until tonight, smiling to yourself thinking of you and her on the phone both laughing when you asked if she was bribing you. you slipped on your converse, grabbed your bag, and locked the front door behind you and started making your way to ellie’s gym.

you got there around seven and you didn’t see jesses car yet but you did see hers. ellie’s beat up 2000 green honda cry sat in a spot towards the back of the parking lot. memories of you leaning on her window practically admitting you liked when she called you sweetheart and the peaceful feeling of comfortable silence you both held.

you heard someone call your name in the distance to turn and see dina getting out of the car, you were so concentrated on ellies car you didn’t even see them pull in. you made your way over and greeted them with a hug as dina wrapped your arm in hers and dragged you in with her, jesse following behind. you tried to calm your nerves but it just wasn’t working. not nervous about being here, even after what happened outside with the man last time, but of seeing her again. you’ve only spoken to her a handful of times but you thought of her more times than you can count.

as soon as you made it closer towards the front door, it was loud, like the first time you were here. loud people, loud lights, loud everything but now knowing it was ellie’s changed it. jesse held the door as dina went in first and you both followed. florescent lights beamed from above you, shining on the sweaty bodies in the gym. it was just like it was the first time you came. your nerves followed you everywhere, but it was worth seeing her again.

you went in and dina guided you guys to the same table you had last time. you wonder if they sit here every time. you looked around for ellie but you didn’t see her anywhere. you saw her car so she has to be here.

dina and jesse got up to go get drinks from the makeshift bar while you sat and waited for them to bring back your drink. you looked over to them waiting their turn when you heard something behind you.

“hey sweetheart,” she whispered close to your ear, and before you could respond she pulled out the the seat next to you and sat down.

“hey ellie,” you said almost startled. she was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, a black t shirt and all her tattoos were showing this time. it was almost mind blowing seeing her and you couldn’t even explain what it did to you. you don’t understand why a girl you barely know has this effect on you.

“i told you to call me el,” she said and laughed kindly towards you, “i have the stuff for you” she finished.

“oh thank you, i’d hope so considering that’s the reason i came,” you joked.

“wait you mean you didn’t come to see me?” she said sounding fake hurt.

“that was just a plus,” you flirted. dina and jesse came back to the table with the drinks before she responded to you and they both greeted ellie as they sat.

“hey els we didn’t see you before we ordered the drinks, i can go get one for ya?” jesse asked her.

“nah i’ll wait til the next round, thanks though” she told him. she smiled at you and the conversation started between all four of you, before you knew it an hour and a half passed, you had more three more rounds and just enjoyed your friday night. the match started and you find it so convenient that you can still see the ring from where the table is so theres no need to get up and watch considering its not ellie up there.

you watched for a bit until it was coming to the end, cheering erupted and ellie told dina and jesse that she was going out for a smoke, before she got up, she leaned over to you and whispered “you coming sweetheart?” softly in your ear, her face inches away from yours, then she moved back and smiled. she held out her hand and you held it as she pulled you up with her as you blushed so hard, you swear you turned into a tomato.

your eyes stayed on her hand holding yours and the beautiful moth tattoo covering her arm, not believing that she’s actually touching you again. you followed behind her as she moved with you through the gym towards the door, as you walked out still hand in hand you saw the side of the building, it was the same place she defended you the first time you met her.

she lead you over to a bench that you never even realized was there. your hands broke as you both sat, she went pull out her cigarette pack and the lighter from her back pocket when she noticed you were staring at her still. she smirked as she opened the pack, and surprisingly pulled out a joint. she put it in her mouth and brought the lighter up to it before telling you “its not polite to stare sweetheart.”

you blushed and looked away as soon as she said it. she laughed and she passed the joint to you, you told her you just couldn’t help it. and you really couldn’t, she’s breathtaking. the way her freckles danced across her whole face, her eyes had a small tint of brown circling her iris, the scar on her right eyebrow, the way her lips just sat perfectly on her face. you so badly want to reach out and touch them again.

you hit it a couple times, you are sure your cheeks haven’t been back to normal since you saw her and you wonder if she’s noticed. you passed her back the joint and she staring at you taking in every detail of you too as she brought it to her mouth and took a hit. blowing out the smoke she smirked, and said “i can’t either sweetheart.”

she leaned back against the bench, legs spread a little as she handed you the joint and asked, “so what brought you here besides jesse?” she acquired. you told her about living in brooklyn, above the cafe you worked and how your time spent there wasn’t totally great but the real reason was running from a shitty past, you weren’t ready to tell her specifics but you told her that’s why you left, you had to get away from what happened there but it was more like who. she told you she understood and then she told you “well i’m glad you’ve made your way here sweetheart.”

you don’t know if it was the alcohol or weed but you sat outside on the bench for another 20 minutes, smoking and laughing as you talked about so much: you talked about the tv shows you’re both watching, the albums you had on repeat, the guilty pleasures you both had and what you both did in your free time. you spoke to one another like you’ve known each other for years. it just feels so good to talk to someone like this again.

she learned that your parents live in portland, so moving coasts was a big deal but you felt like you were on auto-pilot growing up and you knew you had to get out when you could, she learned that you dropped out of college two years and haven’t made any plans to go back but you would like to. you told her a couple funny stories about you and jesse growing up and she laughed at them all.

you found out that she plays guitar and that she spends time drawing and journaling. you learn that ellie was adopted when she was 14, she grew up in boston, and she has an older sister named sarah but that she doesn’t come around much anymore since she gotten married. she told you that her dad passed away from a heart attack about a year ago and since then, her and her uncle tommy.

“im sorry to hear about your dad els” you sympathized.

“its okay sweetheart, just fucking sucks sometimes.” she responded softly as she put the joint out next to her and slipped it back in her cigarette pack. instead this time she pulled out a cigarette and lit that this time. she slid it in her pocket before she stood up off the bench, offering you her hand again and said you should probably head back inside.

you grabbed her warm hand and stood up to follow her, you started the walk towards the side door but before she opened it, she turned around to you and faced you.

“hey sweetheart?” she asked.

“yes els?” you waited for her to continue, her hand still covering yours.

“im glad you came sweetheart, this was nice, i mean as nice as it gets sitting on the side of this place,” she laughed softly, you felt like she was closer than ever but maybe because you just wanted her to be, “you know, id love to do this again.. and maybe play you something on my guitar.. if you want.” she said almost nervously, feeling the urge to look away from you.

“i would love that els.” you said, looking up from staring at your hands together to smiling in her face. you cant believe she asked you, part of you prayed she would, you knew there was a connection here. she realized it too. your eye contact never faded as you stood here.

“great, im looking forward to it more than you know,” she told you sweetly. she let go out hand and you felt slight disappoint in your heart as you assumed she was going to turn around and open the door and this moment would be over. instead, she brought her hand up to your face and let it rest on your cheek as she brushed her thumb over it. the touch of her warm hand sent sparks through your body this time and you couldn’t be bothered moving as she grew closer to you.

“you have no idea how much i wanna kiss you right now.” she whispered, from only what felt like two inches away from your lips. fuck, you thought silently. she was so close to you, you could feel her breathe as she spoke.

“please do it.” you practically whined, you couldn’t take this anymore. all you wanted to do was feel her lips on yours. after you spoke, you felt her thumb move from your cheek to brushing your lips softly. the drinks you had definitely brought out your confident and the want you had for her.

“oh sweetheart,” she purred towards you, “how badly i want to but it has to be more special than this.” she said moving her thumb back to your red cheek.

“just as long as it happens el,” you responded, breathing heavier as your nerves grew in anticipation.

she nodded as she slowly moved her hand off your face and brought it down to your hip and gave it a squeeze, still smiling at you as she reached to open the door and let you through in front of her.

you walk back into the gym and went to find jesse and dina. you saw jesse at the bar and ellie went over to him, telling you she was getting more drinks. you went over to dina at the table and took a seat next to her. you asked her how the match went and she told you same as always and nothing crazy this time.

“you guys were out there for a while, whats up with that?” dina asked while smirking and wiggling her eyebrows at you.

“dina…” you laughed, “we just smoked and talked for a bit.” you replied to her.

“sureeee that’s all, we see the way you look at her!”, she squealed, “and the way she looks at you, it just seems pretty obvious.”

you laughed and told her that nothing happened yet but you did admit to her that you wanted it to.

“stop we knew it!” she laughed loudly and hit the table in excitement. you pulled your hands to your face that was full of embarrassment.

“what do you mean you knew it, was it obvious?” you gasped. your eyes darting towards ellie at the makeshift bar.

“to me and jesse yes.” she told you still smiling over the fact that her two friends maybe starting something new soon.

as you went to reply, the drinks were on the table, jesse and ellie were back already at the table pulling their chairs. the conversation between you and dina came to a halt as you all started talking. you all sat, conversing and finished your last round by the time it hit around 11 pm. you were getting tired and you were definitely drunk after all the rounds of drinks everyone bought. the matches ended an hour ago and you guys were the last few people left besides the lady behind the bar and a couple stragglers paying their tab and chatting.

“hey i think me and d are gonna head out,” he said looking over to dina, who was definitely feeling all the drinks she had, he laughed and said, “this one needs to make it home into bed. can you make it home okay? i can take you now if you need” he asked talking to you.

“no i’m gonna take her home.” ellie cut in before you could respond. you looked at her and smiled as jesse told you to text when you both got home safe. he helped dina up and they made their way to the door. your eyes followed til they left and then you turned to ellie, who was already staring at you.

“that okay sweetheart? that i take you home again?” she asked smirking towards you.

“yeah els, that’s okay.” you blushed as she stood up and put her hand out for the third time tonight. you connected your hands again. touching her had your skin was burning up. you followed her into a back office. paperwork, receipts, and random things littered the room. as you looked around and saw a decent couch, a safe in the corner and a coffee area on a little table and a large desk with folders and boxes of things you didn’t know.

you watched as ellie disconnected your hands to go over to pick up her backpack from the side of the couch and then she grabbed a jacket she had hanging over the deck of the chair to the desk, she slid it over her shoulders then grabbed a piece of paper, writing something non legible from where you were standing. she smiled when she turned towards you and held her arm out motioning to the door for you guys to exit.

the stragglers were gone and the bartender bid ellie goodnight as she walked out the front door. you walked the distance of the gym and made it to the door with ellie, she leaned over and turned the lights off and then held the door opened for you.

you told her thank you and she nodded towards you, “i think we should walk, it’s not far from your apartment.” she spoke looking towards you for confirmation as she turned and locked up the gym for the night.

“that’s okay but how are you going to get home without your car?” you asked. you didn’t want her walking home alone either, you knew she could handle herself but still, the thought made you worry.

“i’m only 5 minutes away from you actually so its not far, ill be back for my car tomorrow.” she told you. you nodded and both of you continued to walk the sidewalk in a comfortable silence next to each other. you glanced up at the sky, noticing the stars and the way the moon beamed over the city. it was so much cooler now than it was earlier and you moved to brush over the goosebumps that covered your arms. ellie noticed your movement and took off her jacket. you turned when you noticed what she was going and told her, “no its okay we’ll be there soon i don’t need it.”

“sorry sweetheart, got to make sure you stay warm.” she smirked as she put it over your shoulders and watched as you put your arms in. you smiled to her as you readjusted it and continued the walk to your place. the smell of her engulfed you and you’ve never felt so comfortable.

“its so beautiful.” you whispered, “and quiet, new york was never like this. they don’t lie when they say the city never sleeps ya know?” you finished.

the city you moved to that you wish you could escape from. the shitty and abusive relationship you wish you could leave behind. the things you tried the most to forget. you never spoke about it, you just ran. the city you wished had better memories connected with it. but now all you want is to create new memories.

when you moved across the country, you told yourself that you’re not getting into anything here because you know you need to heal from the those years of abuse and insecurity so the last thing you expected was to meet ellie and end up feeling this way about her. you don’t want this to happen and you ruin it because you aren’t okay but with her, you feel like you could be okay one day.

“i could only imagine, boston was a busy place too but not the same, it always is quiet here.” she chuckled softly.

“i love it, things finally seem calm now.” you smiled as you looked her. she took in the sight of you in her jacket and she loved it. she can only imagine seeing you wear her t shirts… or nothing at all. she shook the thoughts from her head but she just couldn’t help it. you were the most beautiful girl she’d ever seen. you were breathtaking. she couldn’t believe she’d met someone like you in this shitty small town.

the town where her dad and her moved, and the memories of them together haunted her. now that he was gone, she knew a piece of her was missing. things were incomplete without him. he was all she thought about, the guilt of what happened and how she couldn’t do anything to stop it.

the only time ellie wasn’t thinking about joel was when she was thinking about you, she was grateful that she met you. she didn’t know what this was going to turn into but she hoped it would be something. she sees the effects she has on you and she wishes she really knew how to communicate with you that she feels the same way about you.

you continued the walk in a comfortable silence, both of you wrapped in your thoughts of each another and eventually made it to the front of your building. you turned to face her with a smile,“here i am,” you spoke softly to her, not wanting the night to come to an end.

“here you are, thank you for letting me take you home sweetheart, call it peace of mind,” she admitted.

“thank you for walking me els… do you want to come up?” you said without a thought. you didn’t know if this is was the alcohol talking but you know you didn’t regret it when you said it and you wish that’s what you could blame it on but you knew you wanted this even sober.

“if you want me to sweetheart” she smirked as she responded.

you stepped closer to her as you looked at her, only a couple inches away from her face, watching her eyes move from your eyes to your lips. you knew you both could feel the tension.

“please just say yes.” you sighed wishing you could feel her lips on yours already.

“okay sweetheart, lets go.” she pulled away but connected your hands and it took you a second to recognize that she agreed. you turned around, suddenly nervous about the fact that she’s going to see where you spend your days. you opened the door to the lobby, and ellie held the door as you both walked in. she followed you up the stairs by the front, and you made your way to the front door as you held ellie’s hand in one and used the other to pull your keys from your bag.

you unlocked the door and you brought ellie in with you before the door was shut and you were locking it. you took off her jacket and put it on your coat rack and turned to look at her.

“okay it’s kind of a mess so i’m sorry but-“ you started before she cut you off.

“sweetheart, your place is practically spotless, you should see mine.” ellie laughed.

you laughed as you pulled ellie over to the green couch that took up a lot of your living room but it was a dream purchase and you loved it. you told ellie to take a seat as you walked over to the kitchen and grabbed some water for you both. as you were walking back towards her, she was digging around in her backpack. as you placed the waters down and took a seat, she pulled out weed in a jar and handed it to you.

“here this is yours.” she said.

“oh thank you! i totally forgot, do you want to smoke now- fuck i don’t think i have anything to roll with.” you told her as you went to open the windows in your living room.

instead of saying anything, she reached back into her backpack and pulled out a jar of already rolled joints.

“i came prepared.” she laughed, “and you won’t owe me anything for that.” she said, motioning to the stuff she gave you as her hands were cracking open the jar of pre-rolls.

“ellie- no i’ll give you the cash,” but she shook her head no and brought the lighter to the joint between her lips.

“no, it’s on me, don’t worry about it.” she responded as she took a hit.

“do you give other people weed for free?” you asked, looking at her as she was smoking while sitting next to you on the couch. you wish you could stay like this forever.

“only pretty girls that i like…” she said sweetly as you held eye contact as she handed you the joint.

“oh so you think i’m pretty?” you teased her as you took a hit.

“sweetheart, i think you’re the prettiest girl i’ve ever seen.” she told you. you instantly blush and look away from her, trying not to choke on the smoke you held in your lungs.

“thank you els, i think you’re beautiful.” you said to her. when you looked up, you saw her cheeks tint lightly as she grabbed the joint you held out to her.

“thanks sweetheart.” she said as she put the joint down on a cup at the table you’d been using as an ashtray and she brought her hand up and held your cheek like she did earlier. you couldn’t help yourself as you nuzzled your face into her warm hand. your eye contact only made the tension in the room worse.

“you really are beautiful… sweetheart, can i?” she asked as she looked down at your lips. you nodded and as she came closer, your lips just barely brushing, as she asked, “i need to hear you pretty girl.”

“yes please els- please just kiss me already.” you begged.

her lips were on yours before you could even realized this was actually happening. your lips moved slow together at first but you couldn’t help yourself from deepening the kiss as ellie brought her other hand up and tangled it in your hair as you moaned, her tongue slipped into your mouth, both of you tasting the weed and alcohol you consumed.

one of your hand rested against her chest and the other gripping her arm as you melted into the kiss. both ellie’s hands were in your hair now as your tongues continued to fight for dominance but you let her win and moaned again and she swallowed it as she kissed you.

ellie pulled your leg over her lap so you straddled her, never breaking your lips apart. your lips continued to move in sync as you grinded against her. her hands on your hips moving with you. your lips stay connected until you broke the kiss to come up for air and rested your forehead on hers.

“you okay sweetheart?” ellie panted as she caught her breath too.

“yes els just need a second.” you said as your eyes stayed shut while you tried to control your breathing. you couldn’t believe that you guys finally kissed. the tension was killing you both and now it’s finally happened.

“hey it’s okay, take your time sweetheart.” ellie said as she rubbed a hand along your thigh at a comfortable pace, brushing the cloth from your shorts as she moved it. she brought the other one up to your cheek and lifted your head to look at you. you looked tired and ellie didn’t want to take full advantage of you after you guys had been drinking and smoking all night.

“hey sweetheart, lets get you to bed, we’ll finish this another time i promise.” she said sweetly as you mumbled an “okay els thank you,” and moved off her lap to sit back on the couch. ellie stood up and offered her hand. you stood up and walked both of you to your bedroom.

you moved to sit on the edge of your king sized bed and ellie stood in front of you still holding your hand as you asked her if she wanted to stay the night because it was late and you didn’t want her walking home.

“sure sweetheart i’ll sleep on the couch, and only for your peace of mind.” she chuckled, thinking back to the conversation earlier.

“els we can share the bed, it’s okay, i’ll keep my hands to myself.” you joked and she laughed.

“i don’t think i’d be complaining if you couldn’t but i’m okay on the couch.” ellie insisted.

“els please just lay with me.” you said looking up at her as she moved her hand to rest on your cheek again.

“okay sweetheart.” she finally agreed.

you smiled up at her and you took ellie’s hand from your face and guided her into the bathroom connected to your room. she watched as you bent down and opened the sink cabinet and grabbed a toothbrush. you turned around and handed it to her with a smile. you guys brushed your teeth and then went back into your bedroom.

ellie stood here as you moved across the room to your dresser, and pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts from your drawer and handed them over to ellie. she told you thank you and you smiled at her. ellie walked into the bathroom to change and you walked back to the dresser. you stripped yourself of your shirt and bra before throwing on a different oversized tee and changing your underwear. you didn’t even realize you were soaked after what happened on the couch.

ellie watched you as she leaned against the bathroom door frame as you untangled the sides of your underwear after you pulled them up.

“you’re perfect”, she thought in head before speaking out loud. “thanks sweetheart.” you turned around when ellie spoke, sending her a smile before you moved to your side of the bed, you grabbed the duvet and moved it so you both were able to get in your bed.

you and ellie laid facing each other in a comfortable silence as you were both growing incredibly tired. you felt your eyes starting to get heavy and felt ellie’s hand brush your hair back from your face so you kept your eyes open to look at her.

“el?” you whispered.

“yes sweetheart?” she spoke quietly back to you.

“i really like you… i don’t know if this is too early but it just feels right.”

“i feel it too sweetheart, i like you too so don’t worry,” ellie said softly, hand still holding your face, “now get some sleep, we’ll talk more in the morning pretty girl.”

“goodnight els.” you whispered.

[number1jeonginstan]

can you write a con-noncon fic where they have 2 safe words (fake, real) and reader says the fake safe word but they ignore it and continue. only if u’re comfortable w it tho!!! it’s totally fine if you don’t want to :) (w jeongin/seungmin)

p.s love ur work <3

pairing: Seungmin x afab!reader and Jeongin x afab!reader

warnings: swearing, kissing, smut, dub-con but not actually because I clear everything up in the end. If you aren't comfortable, that's totally fine! Please don't read it if you are!!! Also, please don't do this in real life without a trusted partner, like seriously

word count: 1k

18+ Minors DNI

A/N: I hope you like this because I did kinda a twist on what you asked! Please send me feedback if you like it or want a part two or something &lt;333

smut warnings: unprotected sex, cumming inside, "Forced sex" (not actually...), "Cheating" (again, not actually)  

Your clothed breasts were pressed against the counter as the man behind pounded into you. Your panties and shorts were pulled down to your thighs, and all your attempts at screaming were proved to be futile seeing as the man fucking into you shoved it filled with his fingers. 

“Can’t believe you took my cock with no prep, it was like you were begging for it” 

“Don’t you just need a big cock to stuff you fill?” he asked, not stopping his pace. You tried to scream a no, but your mouth was still muffled. You rapidly shook your head from side to side. 

“I knew you were a whore, prodding around our dorm wearing nothing but Seungmin’s shirt and shorts” He slowly took his fingers out of you, allowing you to speak. 

“I’m not a whore” you whined “You can’t do this, you are Minnie’s friend” You began to start crying. The tears slowly ran down your face as his pace didn’t stop. 

“Yes you can, now take my cock like the little slut your “Minnie” said you were.”

You hated the way his cock felt in you. It was hitting all the spots that made you clamp yourself on his cock, squeezing him harder even though it wasn’t what you were trying to do. “Fuck babe, such a good whore, squeezing my cock so well” 

“Please, please stop he’s going to be home soon” you pleaded while breaking out in a full sob. 

“If you wanted me to stop, you wouldn’t feel so good around me” he moaned pulling his cock out of you. You thought it was over, but you were wrong. He flipped you around so your back was fully pressed against the marble counter. 

He rubbed his cock in between your folds, lubing it up. “Fuck babe, for someone who is complaining, your pussy sure is wet”

He pounded into you again, this time it was faster, a hand reaching down to rub your clit causing a small moan to escape your lips. “God, look at you, complaining about my cock, but still moaning around it. Can’t wait to cum inside of you” he groaned, not slowing down his pace.

The only sound you could register was the sound of skin slapping and how wet you were. You felt ashamed, your cheek pressed against the countertop, the bottom of Seungmin’s shirt slowly riding up on you. 

You were so out of it, that you didn’t notice or hear the door open or the way Seungmin was looking at the both of you, watching your fucked out face. 

“Don’t stop on my account” he called out, causing the both of you to turn your heads. 

“Caramel” you screamed, causing them both to look at you, but Jeongin didn’t stop. He started to thrust into you while picking you from the counter slowly. “Come on Min, don’t you want to fuck your girlfriend?” 

Seungmin just followed the two of you to the couch. “Please Minnie, I begged him to stop, I didn’t want this, promise” you whined, causing him to slap you. 

“If you didn’t want it, why were you so close to cumming. Don’t give me that bullshit again.” 

“Min, I don’t know, please” you whined as Jeongin started thrusting his cock back into you. “Just be a good girl and take his cum for me, you can do that for me, can’t you baby?” you simply nodded, feeling your high close by as Seungmin began to rub your clit. 

Jeongin’s thrust were hard and fast, hitting the spongey part inside of you as he shifted you in his lap. It took him only a few more thrusts for you to cum around him. He followed behind, painting your tight walls with his hot cum, causing the both of you to whine. 

You fell back into his chest, hugging him, tired from what just happened. 

“Baby, who said we were done” Seungmin stared at you, your eyes watering as you looked up at him. “You can’t leave me all by myself” he pulled your hand to feel the bulge in his pants, causing the both of you to moan. 

“Wow Minnie, she’s such a whore. She just came on my cock and I can feel her pussy throbbing around it feeling your cock.” 

“Yeah, she is such a whore for me, just the way I like it” he laughed, kissing your lips. 

He slowly pulled you off of Jeongin’s cock, the both of them watching as his cum slowly dripped out of your cunt and onto your thighs. You were in for a long night. 

—

“So you want us to what?” Seungmin asked while you lay in between your boyfriends. Your head was splayed on top of Jeongin, while he was eating a shrimp burger. The three of you were watching a movie. 

“I just wanna pretend that I’m cheating on you, but Innie is forcing me” you whined, feeling embarrassed by your thoughts. 

“We can do that,” Jeongin said, feeding you a bite of his burger while Seungmin stole a fry. 

“Yeah baby, don’t feel ashamed, you put up with us, the most we can do is something that you want to try. If you don’t like it we can make a safeword” Seungmin said, patting your head as you looked at him. 

“That was the second part, I wanna pretend that I used my safeword, so can we make two?” you asked, batting your eyelash. 

“Of course, anything for our baby” Innie replied, kissing your lips. 

[cre8inghavoc]

Can't help it...

Part 6

inumaki x f!reader

pairing: inumaki x f!reader

genre/warnings: [18+] Characters are aged up. Story contains cursing, new friends, alcohol, college!au, no curse!au, dark humour, SMAU and written parts, fluff, smut.

a/n: ahhh i forgot this was a smau as well... whoops... so here's some smau for u guys hehe

SMAU

WRITTEN PORTION:

As you and Inumaki pulled up to campus and got off his bike, you could feel the weight of people’s gazes on you immediately. Students were blatantly staring, some pretending to scroll on their phones, while others whispered to each other as you passed by. The attention was unnerving, and you found yourself gripping the straps of your backpack a little tighter.

“Why are people staring at us?” you asked under your breath, your voice tinged with confusion as you glanced around.

Inumaki didn’t respond right away. He calmly continued walking and without a word, he pulled out his phone, the faint glow of the screen illuminating his face beneath his helmet.

You watched him for a moment, curious, before his expression shifted—something between amusement and annoyance flickered in his eyes. He tilted his phone in your direction, showing you what he’d just found.

It was a tweet from the university’s notorious campus account:

@CursedUser was seen pulling up to campus with a mystery girl. Who is she?....

Your stomach dropped when you saw the attached photo—clear as day, it was you and Inumaki, as soon as you got off the bike, which was not even 2 minutes ago. “Oh my god, did someone seriously take a picture of us and post it?!” you exclaimed, your voice rising in disbelief.

Inumaki shrugged nonchalantly, his body language showing he wasn’t too bothered by it. “Looks like it,” he said casually, his voice muffled slightly through his helmet.

You grabbed your own phone, your fingers moving faster than your thoughts as you clicked on the tweet. Curiosity got the better of you, and you tapped on the account that had been tagged in the tweet: @CursedUser.

What you saw next made your jaw drop. The follower count next to his handle was in the millions. Videos of Inumaki riding his bike, doing stunts, and even casually talking to his followers filled the page. You scrolled in disbelief, each post racking up thousands of likes and comments.

Your eyes widened as the realization hit you, you stopped in your tracks and you looked back at him in shock. “Wait… you're famous?! A famous biker?!”

Inumaki chuckled, clearly amused by your reaction. “I guess you could say that,” he replied, his tone casual as ever.

You stared at him, still processing everything. “How did I not know this? You have, like, millions of followers!”

He gave a small shrug. “I don’t really bring it up. It’s just a hobby that got popular.”

You blinked, your thoughts racing. “A hobby?! People take pictures of you, and you have a huge following on TikTok and Instagram… that’s not just a hobby, Inumaki, that’s a thing!”

He gave you a relaxed smile. “It’s no big deal.”

You, on the other hand, were far from calm. “No big deal? People are staring at us, taking pictures of us! People think we’re dating—and some girls are literally mad that you’re with me! Oh my god, we’re not even—” You cut yourself off, the words stumbling out faster than you could think.

Inumaki's expression softened as he watched you freak out. His smile faded, but there was a gentle amusement in his eyes. “Relax,” he said calmly. “They love making things up. It’s just rumors.”

You huffed, still not fully believing it. “Yeah, but people are mad, Toge! I didn’t sign up for this kind of attention. I didn’t even know you were, like, famous on social media!”

Inumaki smiled sheepishly. “It’s not a big deal, seriously. I don’t really mention it because, well, I don’t care about all that.” He shrugged like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“But people think we’re together! That’s…” you trailed off, glancing around as you noticed more eyes on the two of you, whispering. “This is so weird...”

He stepped closer, his expression softening as he met your eyes. “Look, if it’s bothering you, I can clear it up. I’ll tell people we’re just friends, and they’ll stop talking.”

You hesitated, feeling an odd pang at the thought of him saying you were just friends. But that’s all you were, right? Just friends.

“Yeah… maybe,” you replied quietly, your heart betraying the calm tone you were trying to keep. “I just… need a second to process this.”

Inumaki nodded, his gaze steady and reassuring. “Take your time. But nothing’s changed between us, okay? We’re still just us.”

You nodded slowly, trying to take in everything he said, but your thoughts were still racing. The idea of being the center of attention because of Toge’s popularity was overwhelming. The whispers around you felt louder now, and you couldn’t shake the weight of people watching your every move.

“But it’s not just us,” you muttered, glancing around at the students who were still sneaking glances. “It feels like the entire campus is waiting for us to do something… or for you to confirm something.”

Inumaki followed your gaze, his eyes narrowing slightly as he noticed the attention. “Let them talk. They’re not worth stressing over,” he said, his voice calm and steady.

You sighed, biting your lip as you tried to shake off the anxiety building up inside you. “It’s easy for you to say that. You’re used to it. But this is… new for me.”

He took a step closer, and suddenly you felt the warmth of his presence a little more than usual. His hand hovered near your arm, as if he was about to reach out but hesitated. “I get it,” he said softly. “It’s a lot. I know. But I meant what I said earlier—I don’t care what they think. I just care about spending time with you.”

Your heart did a strange flip at his words, and for a second, you couldn’t look at him. The weight of his gaze was too much, and it made your pulse race. “I… I know,” you murmured, trying to sound casual, but the flutter in your chest made it hard to keep your voice steady.

There was a brief, tense silence between the two of you. The noise of the campus around you faded into the background as your focus narrowed on the way his eyes softened when he looked at you. You weren’t sure if it was just your imagination, but something in the air between you shifted—like there was more to his words than he was letting on.

Finally, you broke the silence, your voice quieter than before. “Do you think… maybe we should let them think what they want? Like, not deny it?”

Inumaki raised an eyebrow, surprised by your question. “What do you mean?”

You hesitated, feeling your cheeks warm slightly. Thank god you still had your helmet on. “I mean, if people are going to make assumptions, maybe it’s easier to just… let them. We don’t have to explain ourselves.”

His gaze locked on yours, and for a moment, you could see a flicker of something deeper in his eyes. “So, you’re saying we just go along with it?”

You shrugged, trying to play it off. “I don’t know… maybe? It’s better than denying it and making it a bigger deal, right?”

Inumaki’s lips quirked up into a small smile, but there was a serious edge to his expression. “If that’s what you want, I’m fine with it.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his words. You didn’t know why, but the idea of people assuming you were together… didn’t seem as bad as you thought it would. Maybe part of you wasn’t as against the idea as you had convinced yourself to be.

“Yeah, let’s just… leave it. Let them think what they want,” you finally said, your voice barely above a whisper.

Inumaki’s smile widened just a bit, his eyes glinting with that familiar warmth. “Alright. We’ll do that then.”

You stood there for a moment longer, feeling the weight of an unspoken understanding settle between the two of you. Whatever this was, you weren’t ready to define it—but maybe, just maybe, you were okay with letting things unfold in their own time.

“Come on. We don’t want to be late for class,” he said, his tone casual again, though the warmth in his eyes lingered.

You nodded, falling into step beside him as the two of you made your way through the campus. The whispers and glances were still there, but with Inumaki next to you, they seemed to fade into the background. You tried to shake off the nervous energy from earlier and focus on the fact that, for now, things were back to normal—or as normal as they could be.

When you entered the classroom, you noticed a few heads turn your way, but no one said anything outright. You glanced at Inumaki, and he gave you a small nod as if to say, “Ignore it.” You took a deep breath and followed him to your usual spot.

As you sat down next to him, you couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of comfort. Even though you were still hyper-aware of the attention on you, sitting beside him felt natural, like you didn’t have to explain yourself to anyone. 

He didn’t seem to care about the attention, and his calm presence grounded you in a way you hadn’t expected.

Before you knew it, the class ended, and the day moved on.

By the time lunch rolled around, you and Inumaki had parted ways to meet up with your separate friend groups. You spotted Nobara waving you over to a table in the courtyard where Megumi and Yuji were already sitting, deep in conversation.

“Y/N! Over here!” Nobara called, waving enthusiastically as you made your way over.

You smiled, grateful to see your friends and eager to distract yourself from the whirlwind of emotions you’d been dealing with all morning. As you sat down, Nobara gave you a curious look. “So, what’s this I hear about you arriving with a certain mystery biker this morning?”

Megumi raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything, while Yuji’s eyes lit up with curiosity. “Yeah, we saw it on twitter and heard some people talking about it. You and Inumaki?” he asked, his tone teasing.

You felt your cheeks flush. “Shhh!” You quickly shut his mouth with your hand, looking around to make sure no one was listening. “Don’t say his name out loud,” you whispered, panicking slightly.

Yuji blinked, surprised by your reaction but still grinning behind your hand. “Okay, okay!” he mumbled.

You pulled your hand away, feeling the heat rise to your face as you tried to play it off. “It’s nothing. We just… came to school together.”

Nobara narrowed her eyes playfully. “Uh-huh. And that’s why everyone’s talking about how you’re the ‘mystery girl’ Inumaki showed up with? Seems like more than just a ride to school to me.”

You sighed, feeling the familiar nervousness creeping up again. “People are making it into a bigger deal than it is.”

Yuji, still amused, chuckled softly. “Well, for what it’s worth, I think it’s kind of cool. The mysterious biker has a mystery girl now.”

You groaned, putting your head in your hands. “Not you too, Yuji…”

Nobara smirked, leaning in closer. “Come on, Y/N, spill. What’s really going on between you and Inumaki? There’s no way it’s just a coincidence you two showed up together like that.”

You groaned again, feeling cornered. “There’s nothing going on, seriously! He just gave me a ride. That’s it.”

Megumi, who had been quietly observing the conversation, finally spoke up. “You do realize people love a good mystery, right? And Inumaki’s whole ‘nobody knows who he really is’ thing makes it worse. People are gonna speculate.”

“Exactly!” Nobara chimed in, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. “He’s already the mysterious, hot biker, and now you’re suddenly the girl he’s been spotted with. Of course, everyone’s going to jump to conclusions.”

You sighed, feeling the pressure mount. “Yeah, well, that’s their problem, not mine. I didn’t ask for this attention.”

Yuji gave you a sympathetic look, though his grin never faded. “If it’s bothering you that much, maybe just talk to him about it.”

You paused, unsure how to respond. Sure, you and Inumaki had briefly discussed letting the rumors slide, but you couldn’t help but wonder if that was the right call. Was it better to clear things up and risk making it worse, or just let everyone believe whatever they wanted?

Nobara’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “So, what’s he like? I mean, you’ve spent more time with him than any of us. Is he as mysterious as people say?”

You hesitated for a moment, thinking back to the quiet moments you’d shared with Inumaki. Despite his popularity and the aura of mystery surrounding him, he had always been kind, laid-back, and… comforting. You realized you hadn’t even seen him as the “mysterious biker” that everyone else seemed obsessed with. To you, he was just… Toge.

“He’s… nice,” you said, feeling the warmth rise to your cheeks again. “He doesn’t care about all the attention. It’s not really his thing. He just likes to ride.”

Nobara raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued by your answer. “Huh. So he’s not all about the hype?”

“Nope,” you replied, shaking your head. “He’s super chill about everything.”

Yuji leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms with a thoughtful expression. “That makes sense. I mean, he always gives off that ‘doesn’t care about anything’ vibe. Guess that’s part of what makes him so cool.”

Nobara suddenly leaned in, her eyes gleaming mischievously. “So, does he ever take the mask off when you’re alone?”

Your eyes widened at the question, and you felt your face go bright red. “N-Nobara! That’s not—he—” you stammered, flustered.

Nobara laughed, enjoying your reaction. “Just messing with you! But seriously, if you do get a peek, you better tell us.”

You buried your face in your hands again, groaning. “You guys are impossible…”

Here’s the revised version with Inumaki entering the scene and teasing Y/N:

You buried your face in your hands again, groaning. “You guys are impossible…”

Before anyone could say more, you felt a familiar presence behind you, and the hairs on the back of your neck stood up. Slowly, you peeked through your fingers and froze.

Inumaki stood behind you, his helmet still on, casually holding another helmet in his hand. He tilted his head slightly as if he had heard enough of the conversation to get the gist of it.

“Talking about me, Y/N?” he teased, his voice muffled slightly through the helmet.

Your entire body stiffened as your face turned an even deeper shade of red. You couldn’t bring yourself to turn around and face him, so instead, you stared straight into Nobara’s eyes, silently pleading for her to not make things worse.

Nobara, of course, couldn’t resist. She smirked at Yuji, who was desperately trying to hold in his laughter, covering his mouth with his hand to keep from bursting out.

Megumi, ever the calm one, simply gave Inumaki a nod in greeting, acknowledging his presence without any fuss.

Inumaki shifted slightly, leaning down a bit as he continued to tease. “Didn’t know I was such a hot topic today,” he said lightly, his voice filled with amusement.

You finally turned around, your cheeks still burning. “We were just… talking,” you mumbled, your voice barely above a whisper.

Nobara, ever the instigator, grinned. “Oh, we were definitely talking about you, Inumaki. Y/N here was just telling us how ‘nice’ you are.”

You shot Nobara a glare, silently begging her to stop, but she just smirked in response. Inumaki, however, chuckled lightly under his helmet.

“Mind if I steal Y/N for a bit?” he asked, his tone still casual, but there was a hint of something more beneath it.

Nobara raised an eyebrow, her smirk widening. “Steal her away, huh? I mean, go ahead, but don’t keep her too long,” she teased, making you feel even more flustered.

Megumi just shrugged, while Yuji’s eyes lit up with amusement. “Yeah, sure, take her,” he said, barely able to suppress his laughter.

numaki glanced down at you and nodded toward the spare helmet in his hand. “Come on,” he said softly.

You hesitated for a moment, but eventually pushed your chair back and stood, feeling the weight of your friends' eyes on you. Nobara, Yuji, and Megumi watched intently, curiosity and amusement clear on their faces.

Inumaki held the helmet up, then gently placed it on your head. You felt a flutter in your stomach as his fingers brushed your hair back, making sure the helmet fit snugly. He adjusted it with care, his movements calm and steady.

Your cheeks burned as you stood there, trying to keep your cool while your friends watched everything unfold. Nobara’s grin was practically ear-to-ear, and Yuji looked like he was holding back another laugh. Even Megumi glanced between you and Inumaki with a knowing look.

Once the helmet was on, Inumaki’s fingers found the straps under your chin, and he leaned in slightly, securing the buckle with ease. His face was close enough that you could see the focus in his eyes, and the warmth of his touch made your heart race even faster.

“There,” he said, stepping back slightly. “All set.”

You swallowed hard, feeling completely flustered under the weight of his gaze and the situation.

Nobara broke the silence first, her grin widening. “Well, look at that. Personal service.”

Yuji finally let out a chuckle, shaking his head. “VIP treatment for Y/N, huh?”

You could only glance down at the ground, too embarrassed to say anything as Inumaki’s calm, steady presence lingered next to you.

“Ready to go?” he asked, his voice soft but teasing.

You nodded, too flustered to say much more. Inumaki gently placed a hand on your back, guiding you away from the table toward his bike, leaving your friends behind, who were now sharing amused glances and whispers.

You followed him toward his bike, trying your best to calm the flurry of emotions that were racing through you.

When you reached his bike, Inumaki glanced back at you. “Hop on,” he said, giving you a small nod as he mounted the bike himself.

You hesitated for a second, but then climbed onto the back, settling in behind him. The helmet was secure, but your heart was still racing—not from nerves this time, but from the fact that you were holding onto him again, your arms instinctively wrapping around his waist.

Inumaki turned his head slightly, glancing at you over his shoulder. “You good?”

You nodded, though you weren’t sure if it was the ride that had your stomach in knots or the closeness you now felt. “Yeah, I’m good,” you managed to say, your voice a little muffled by the helmet.

“Where are you taking me?”

Inumaki tilted his head slightly again, the hint of a playful smile in his eyes. “Just wait and see,” he replied, his voice soft yet teasing.

He turned his attention back to the bike. He started the engine with a smooth, practiced motion, the sound rumbling beneath you. With a quick flick of his hand, he shut his visor down, and without another word, he took off, the bike surging forward as you held on tight.

After a few more minutes, Inumaki slowed the bike, eventually pulling into a quiet park on the edge of town. He guided the bike to a stop near a small clearing, surrounded by tall trees and a few scattered benches. The sound of the engine faded, leaving only the soft rustling of leaves in the breeze.

Inumaki sat still for a moment, then flipped up his visor and glanced back at you. “What do you think?” he asked, his voice calm but with a hint of curiosity.

You pulled off your helmet, taking a deep breath of the fresh air as you looked around. It was peaceful here, a welcome change from the noise and attention of earlier. “It’s perfect,” you said, smiling softly as you met his eyes.

He nodded, seeming satisfied with your response, both getting off the bike and taking off your helmets.

“Enjoy the ride?” he asked, a hint of teasing in his tone.

You smirked and nodded. “Not bad. Could’ve used a little more speed, though.”

He chuckled, his voice low. “I didn’t think you could handle more than that.”

You raised an eyebrow at him. “You don’t think I can handle it? Please.”

Inumaki tilted his head, clearly enjoying this back-and-forth. “Oh yeah? Think you can keep up with me?”

“Easily,” you shot back, crossing your arms, feeling a boldness creep into your voice. “In fact, maybe next time I’ll drive.”

He laughed, a smooth sound that made your stomach flutter a bit. “I’d love to see that,” he said, his eyes lingering on yours for a moment longer before he pushed off the bike and stood in front of you, his presence close and warm.

You felt your heart skip slightly at the proximity, but you refused to back down. “I’ll show you one of these days,” you said with a smirk, holding his gaze. “Then we’ll see who’s really got the skills.”

Inumaki stepped even closer, his voice dropping to a low, teasing tone. “I like the confidence,” he said, his eyes flicking over your face for a moment before he added, “but I’m not so sure you can back it up.”

You swallowed, feeling the heat rise to your face but not willing to let him win that easily. “Is that a challenge, Inumaki?”

“Depends. You up for it?”

“Always.”

He chuckled again, his eyes glinting with amusement as he leaned back just slightly. “Guess we’ll see.”

There was a moment of charged silence between you, the playful energy lingering in the air as you stood there. You were caught somewhere between wanting to push the teasing further and trying to figure out how to keep your cool around him.

Finally, you broke the silence with a playful nudge to his shoulder. “What’s with the sudden interest in stealing me away, anyway? You got bored with your fan club?”

Inumaki raised an eyebrow, clearly entertained. “What can I say? Maybe I just wanted to spend time with you.”

His words, though casual, made your heart flutter. You tried to brush it off, keeping the teasing going. “Could’ve just asked, you know.”

“I didn’t think you’d mind me stealing you for a bit.”

“Maybe I do.”

Inumaki’s smirk widened as he leaned in just a little closer, the teasing glint in his eyes more obvious now. “Maybe you do? Sounds like you’re not sure.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, refusing to let him win so easily. “Oh, I’m sure,” you shot back, feeling your pulse race under the intensity of his gaze. “But I think you’re the one who’s a little too confident.”

Inumaki raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying this. “Confident? Nah." He leaned back slightly, his smirk never fading. “You’re not as tough as you act.”

“You think I’m not tough? You must not know me at all.”

He chuckled, shaking his head slightly. “Oh, I know you,” he said, his voice dropping a bit. “That’s why I know you’re bluffing.”

“Bluffing, huh? You’re really underestimating me, Inumaki.”

“Maybe. Or maybe you’re just all talk.”

You felt a surge of competitiveness rise in you, and you stepped a little closer, matching his energy. “Careful, Toge,” you said, your voice low but teasing. “You might not like what happens if you keep testing me.”

His smile widened, clearly liking where this was going. “I don’t know,” he said, his voice equally soft and teasing. “I think I’d enjoy it.”

The playful tension between you two hung in the air, and for a moment, it felt like a game—both of you pushing and pulling, seeing who would crack first. You weren’t about to let him win that easily, though.

You crossed your arms, feeling the spark of competitive energy between you two. “You sound awfully sure of yourself,” you teased, raising an eyebrow. “I’m starting to think you enjoy pushing my buttons.”

Inumaki chuckled softly, stepping just a little closer again. “Maybe I do. You make it fun.”

You scoffed, trying to hide how flustered you were. “Fun? You haven’t seen anything yet.”

He tilted his head slightly, his eyes gleaming with mischief. “Oh? So what exactly am I in for?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“I think I already do.”

His words sent a wave of heat through you, and you had to fight to keep your composure. You were determined to stay in control of the situation, no matter how much he was testing you.

“Don’t get too ahead of yourself,” you shot back, tilting your head in mock defiance. “I’m full of surprises.”

Inumaki grinned, clearly enjoying the banter. “Is that so? Guess I’ll have to stick around and find out.”

You tried to keep your cool, but the way his eyes were fixed on you, the playful tension hanging between you, made it hard to focus on anything else. “Well,” you said with a smirk, “good luck with that.”

His smirk deepened, as if he had already won this round. “I don’t need luck,” he replied smoothly. “I’ve got you figured out.”

“Oh really? You think you’ve got me all figured out?”

Inumaki didn’t back down, stepping even closer, the space between you practically nonexistent now. His eyes flickered with something more as he replied, “Yeah. I do.”

His smirk softened as he leaned in even closer, his eyes focused on yours. For a split second, your breath caught in your throat as he closed the space between you, and your heart pounded in your chest.

His face was so close now, you could feel the warmth radiating from him. It was almost as if he was going to—

But just before his lips could brush yours, Inumaki stopped, that teasing smirk returning to his face as he lingered there, leaving you hanging. His eyes glinted with amusement as he stayed close, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you.

“Got you,” he whispered, his voice low and teasing, pulling back slightly but not enough to give you any real distance.

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, your face burning with heat. You narrowed your eyes, trying to recover quickly. “Really? You’re going to play like that?”

Inumaki chuckled softly, stepping back just a little more, his smirk widening. “What can I say? I like to keep things interesting.”

“You think you’re so smooth, don’t you?”

He tilted his head slightly, shrugging in that casual, confident way. “I don’t think,” he teased. “I know.”

“Yeah, well… you’re not as clever as you think.”

“Oh? And here I thought you liked a little challenge.”

“I do,” you shot back, your voice steady as you met his gaze head-on. “But I’m not the only one getting challenged here, am I?”

Inumaki’s smirk softened into something more playful, his eyes never leaving yours. “Maybe not,” he admitted, his tone still teasing but with a hint of something else. “But I’m enjoying it. It’s kinda fun watching you try to figure me out.”

“You think I’ll just keep playing along?”

“I think you’re enjoying it more than you’re letting on.”

You scoffed, though you couldn’t hide the slight smile creeping onto your lips. “Don’t flatter yourself. I can walk away anytime.”

"Yet you’re still here.”

He gave you one last playful look before turning toward his bike. “Come on. Let’s head back before we give them something else to talk about.”

You hesitated for a second, still feeling the buzz from the almost-kiss, before following him to the bike. As you climbed on behind him, you couldn’t help but wonder if this teasing game was just that—or if there was something more...

Taglist <3

@madaqueue @mikko-mikko @arabella0001 @swarachxle @s3ns4ti0n4l @jdgfsgdgdvf @tomikixd @arabella0001 @emotionalasf

[pensat-i-fet]

His very own real princess (Pedri x Reader)

**I'm back with another imagine! This one was requested many moons ago and the anon who sent it might have forgotten about it so sorry 😕 but I got the inspiration for it and so I wanted to share it! I'm not so used to writing short format anymore so I feel everything could be a series. Let me know if you'd like this concept to be one! ☺️ And enjoy! ❤️**

Word count: 3675

Masterlist

Wattpad

Being famous was not as great as people made it up to be. For Pedri, it meant leaving the house was too much sometimes. He had to deal with people following him and even getting in front of his car just to get his attention. He was asked to sign autographs and to take photos every couple of minutes. While he loved his fans, it could be a bit much. Especially when he could tell they were filming him so they could post the video on TikTok for a couple hundred likes. So, one day, he tried to avoid those people by going to a park. He could probably lose them there. There were so many trees and dogs that made it harder to move quickly around the area.

For you, it had been a bit different. Growing up your family wanted to keep you a secret almost. For security reasons…or so they said. So, naturally, you wanted to rebel against them and do the complete opposite. Still, it wasn’t until you turned 18 that you started to show up at official events. And now you were 20, you realised maybe your parents had been right all along. But you weren’t going to tell them that. Of course. So while some paparazzi were chasing you, you spotted a park and thought you could hide there for a bit. Maybe even call your chauffeur so he could pick you up and save you from the vultures.

“Oh! Sorry”.

Pedri turned to look at the girl who was apologising to him. You had bumped into each other and he hit you in the head with his shoulder without meaning to. He hadn’t even seen you there.

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry. Are you alright?”

And then, it happened. You looked up to see his face and you couldn’t believe who it was that you were talking to.

“Oh my God…oh my God”, was all you could say.

“I take it you know who I am”.

“Yeah, who doesn’t?”

Pedri chuckled. “I guess there are some lucky folks out there who don’t. But really, are you ok?”

“Yes, it’s fine. Just more shocked to see you here than anything else”.

Pedri smiled at you and you were trying hard not to swoon. Being hidden from the public eye meant you hadn’t been around a lot of famous people before. Your second cousins were way more used to this and always told you famous people were just normal people. To them…not to you. To you, famous people were…fascinating.

“I was planning on hiding here for a bit”, you said.

“Me too, but I don’t want to ruin your plan so I could leave…”.

Pedri started to look around, getting ready to leave so you stopped him. “You don't know who I am so that makes you good company. Perfect company actually. So you can stay. Also, you got here first”.

“Should I know who you are?”

“I guess not”, you shrugged. Not everyone followed your family. Thankfully.

“Are you a singer?

“Babies cry when I sing”.

“Actress?”

“Nope”.

“Influencer”.

“I only influence how much money there is left in my dad's bank account”.

You thought it was really cute how he concentrated, trying to guess. “Then…a model?”

“No, but I appreciate the compliment”.

“What compliment?”

“If you think I could be a model, then you think I'm pretty”.

“Well”, he started. “I like to invite pretty girls to eat or have a drink so…which one is it going to be?”

“There is an ice cream ban there…if you dare approach it”.

It made you laugh how Pedri looked around the area, making sure no one who could know him was there and then he turned to look at you again.

“What flavour?”

“One ball of coffee and one of vanilla, please”.

“Sounds sophisticated”.

“I guess you’re getting closer to my identity”, you laughed.

“What are you? A princess?”

“Nah, the princesses are my cousins”.

Pedri laughed before going to the ban to get the ice cream. The funny thing about being part of the Royal family was that it was so weird that many thought you were joking when you said that. But you weren’t. Not many people knew your parents but they still were part of the family so…they got attention. And now, you got the attention too.

“Here is your ice cream, your Majesty”.

“Thank you, Golden boy”, you joked back.

“Does that make me royalty too?”

“I guess. Football royalty so less hated than real royalty”. “Less hated? You clearly aren’t on Twitter”.

No, you weren’t. No amount of therapy would heal you after reading what people wrote about you or your family there.

Sitting down on the grass and eating an ice cream while chatting with Pedri was something that healed your mood. It was so nice to be with someone who didn’t know who you were but that also understood how you felt. Even if he didn’t know it yet.

“There are a lot of kids and parents around now. I feel no one will even look at us while we leave”.

You looked around and agreed with his assessment. “Ok, where should we go?”

“I don’t know. Wanna go walk near the beach? It’s usually where I end up when I go out. It’s not often I do but it’s nice to go there”.

“I like the beach”.

“Where are you from?”

“Well…it’s a funny question that one”, you sighed.

“How so?” “I was born in The Netherlands, then lived in Madrid for a bit, went to school in Switzerland and Wales and now I’m back in Spain. I go to different cities all the time. I like travelling”.

“Wow, that’s a lot. Was it a boarding school you went to?”

“Yeah”.

“Maybe you are a princess after all”.

You giggled and looked down to hide your blush. Yes, your life sounded very much like that of a princess. Even if about 40 family members needed to die for you to become one for real.

“I love this”, you said, looking around and feeling so…normal.

“Yeah? That’s good”.

Pedri smiled at you and you realised maybe it wasn’t so normal what was going on. Sure, you were on a walk like a normal person but you were walking with a very famous footballer. That didn’t happen every day. At least not to you.

“And I see pizza there. Do you want a slice?”

“I probably shouldn’t…”.

“But Pedri! Today everything is possible! You’re not a football player but just Pedro from Tenerife. And I’m not a princess”.

“What are you then?”, he asked, smirking.

“I’m just a girl standing in front of a boy…asking him to get some pizza”.

The excitement of the crazy afternoon made you lose a bit of the control you usually had and you grabbed Pedri’s arm to take him to the pizza ban. It wasn’t like holding hands but…once the physical contact started, you were both very aware of it. But pretended it was all normal.

After buying the pizza slices, you didn’t wait a second to start eating. You were so hungry and it wasn’t often you got to eat greasy pizza with your hands.

“That burns!”, you complained, opening your mouth and using your hand as a fan.

“Maybe wait a little to eat”.

“I was hungry”, you pouted and that made Pedri stare at your lips.

“You got some sauce on your mouth”.

“I think I have a mirror on my bag…”.

But before you had time to find it, Pedri used one of his napkins to clean your face. When you looked up at him, you noticed he seemed to have done that without even realising.

“Sorry”.

“No, don’t be. Thank you for not letting me look dirty while we walked”.

“Princesses have to always look perfect”.

“Exactly”, you told him, laughing.

But good things had to come to an end and soon Pedri started to notice people looking at him. That meant it was time to go home.

“I’m sorry. It just…that’s my life”.

“I get it”, you told him, wanting to explain to him how much you actually got it. “It was fun to spend some time with you though”.

“Would you like to do it again?”

“I would. But maybe somewhere more private”.

“Do you have Instagram? So you can follow me and we can talk about meeting”.

That made you pause. You had an official account controlled by people hired by your family but also a private one. So maybe you could use that one to follow him.

“Yeah. I’ll follow you later and send you a message”.

“Cool. See you…soon?”

You nodded, not knowing what to do. Should you hug him? But then all the people ready to surround him showed you that no, a hug wouldn’t be a good idea. So you said goodbye and left.

Pedri was entering the dressing room a couple of days after you met, not really looking at his teammates but at his phone. You two had been texting ever since you separated. And he was constantly checking to see if you had sent him a new message.

“Hello, your Majesty”, said one of Pedri’s teammates and it took him a second to notice he was looking at him.

“Sorry?”

“I just said hi to your Majesty. Would you like us to find a throne for you to sit on?”

“What are you on about?”

“Haven't seen the cover of the magazine yet?”, asked Frenkie.

“I haven't done any covers lately…”.

“The gossip magazine”, pointed out Lamine. “It’s all everyone is talking about”.

“I don’t get it. I haven’t done anything to be in one of those magazines”.

“How about going out with a pretty girl the other day? Paparazzi are everywhere. You should know that by now”.

So people had seen him when he was hanging out with you. Great. You didn’t seem like someone who’d enjoy the attention. But why make such a big deal out of him being seen with someone unknown?

“You also chose the wrong girl to date”.

“I’m not dating her but she's just a normal girl…”.

“Who's related to the Royal family. And here we were worrying about Gavi being the one who could become king”.

“I would have made a great king”, said Gavi, raising his chin proudly.

“You would have made a terrible king”, told him Fermín, shaking his head.

“What do you mean Royal family?”

Pedri was about to start freaking out. You joked about being a princess but…was it not a joke? What? He knew the princesses! Leonor, Sofía, Victoria, …none of them were you. So what the heck was going on?

“She’s like a second or third cousin of the real princesses but the media has been trying to find out everything about her in the last few years”, explained Pau.

“How do you know so much about that?”

“My mum loves the Royals. I live with her and she talks about it”, shrugged the youngster.

The jokes continued but Pedri didn’t care. He just kept thinking about how you had lied to him. And he got it in a way. It couldn’t be easy to be in your position but…you had spent two days talking to each other about a lot of personal stuff. Didn’t you trust him enough to tell him the truth?

When he finished training and picked up his phone again, he saw a text from you saying “I’m sorry”. A part of him wanted to ignore it but you didn’t deserve that kind of treatment despite your lies. So he asked you to meet instead. But you were in Madrid for a couple of days so it’d have to wait. You apologized multiple times and Pedri told you it was ok but…you weren’t so sure.

“What’s wrong?”, asked your cousin Sofía, who was a real princess.

“You saw the magazines, right?”

“Yes. Wanna talk about it?”

“I…we bumped into each other randomly and it was so good to meet someone who didn’t know who I was. You get it, Sof. If someone gets it, it’ll be you”.

“I do. Is he mad at you for lying?”

“Not really”, you said, frowning. “I expected him to be but he seems to understand why I lied. He also gets it”.

“I bet he does. So, what are you going to do?”

“We’ll meet when I get back to Barcelona in a few days”.

Sofía laughed looking at you. “That smile…someone is smitten!”

“How could I not be? Have you seen him? And he’s super nice too, not just handsome. But I fear I’ve ruined it”.

“Don’t be so negative. Let’s just get ready for the match and forget about your Barça boy for a couple of hours”.

It wasn’t a secret that the king of Spain supported Atlético de Madrid and a lot of people suspected his daughter Sofía did as well. However, it was very hard for her to attend matches without people noticing but she had become a bit of a pro at it. And now she was taking you to the match too.

The match was fun and Atleti won so Sofía was very happy. And you didn’t get spotted by anyone…or so you thought.

“Pepi!”, called Ferran when Pedri was entering the dressing room in the morning.

“What?”

“Your princess is a traitor, she doesn't even support you”.

“What are you talking about?”

“She was at the Atleti match yesterday with Princess Sofía. But I bet you can turn her into a Barça fan”.

Ferran’s wink didn’t stop Pedri from feeling so weird about this whole situation. Or more like jealous. What if you had your eye on an Atleti player?

But he could only stare at the photos in the article. After your meeting, he had only the memory of how you looked that day. Your private Instagram only had a handful of photos and a few were of your dogs. The official Instagram only had a few official photos and…even though that was you too, it wasn’t the you Pedri knew. The girl in the photos from the Atleti match was you. Laughing with your cousin and looking so happy.

The article…he didn’t like as much. After the photos of what the press called “a date” were published, they just assumed you were seeing Pedri. So what were you doing watching a rival team? It wasn’t as if you went to see a Real Madrid match, God forbid. But still…shouldn’t you be supporting “your boyfriend”?

“Hi”.

A few days later, you were back in Barcelona and Pedri invited you to have lunch with him. Finding a place where no one would see you was hard, but your family knew a few tricks to achieve that.

“Hey. It’s good to see you again”.

This time, you did hug as a greeting. Even if you had spoken only via texts, it still felt like you knew each other so well now. So a hug seemed like the right thing to do.

“I’m sorry about everything that happened. I just…I don’t know, Pedri. Being with you made me forget who I was for a second and I didn’t think about how this could affect you”.

“It’s ok. You know I get it. It’s the same for me. My every move is overanalysed. Though I guess being a princess is a bit more important”.

“Not this again”, you shook your head, laughing. “I’m not a princess. I’m a nobody, really. But the press was waiting for a moment like this. A scandal or whatever”.

“Eating pizza in public is very scandalous. I don’t know how your reputation will recover”.

You laughed at Pedri’s joke but also remembered what you had been told. “It’s not so much what I did but who I did it with”.

“Oh…ok”.

When the photos were published, your parents talked to you about all the reasons why you should stay away from Pedri. Before you even had time to say nothing was going on…at least not yet.

“It’s stupid. I told you I’m a nobody. But family connections dictate this or that…I don’t want to date a politician or another royal just because it’s what I’m supposed to do. I don’t have it as bad as my cousins. You know, the real princesses. But still…it’s boring. I want to be able to make my own decisions”.

“You don’t want to date a politician…but would you like to date me?”

Being so annoyed with your family and their restrictions, you didn’t realise Pedri wasn’t stupid and could easily read between the lines.

“You’re better than a politician so…”.

“Look”, said Pedri, grabbing your hand to hold it. “No relationship was going to be easy for me. I knew that. So…this doesn’t scare me”.

“Really? I was actually worried it would”.

“I could see it in your face”.

“Can you read minds now? Is that how you know where to shoot the ball?”

“No, that’s because I’m a generational talent”, joked Pedri, making you laugh. “But I mean it. I’m not scared. Are you?”

“Not as much as I probably should”.

“But…are you an Atleti fan? These are the important conversations we need to have before trying to date”.

“That’s my cousin. I don’t really have a team. So I might let you convince me to become a Barça fan. I already support Spain so…”.

“Even against The Netherlands?”, he asked. Your mum was Dutch so it was a fair question.

“Only if you play for Spain that day”.

And so you both forgot about what people would say, what people would demand from each of you and started to date. There was no need to hide since there were photos of your first date online already. Even if back then you didn’t want to admit it was a date.

Being together compensated for any comments or insults…but Pedri was starting to get a bit tired of his teammates curtsying in front of him and calling him Majesty. They did it with you too, which only made you laugh.

“I told you, guys. I’m not a princess”.

“No. Not officially”, told you Pedri. “But you are my very own princess. My queen even”.

Your blush made everyone laughed. It was so obvious to everyone how in love you both were.

However, the media was going to try to find anything that could make it sound like your lovely love story wasn’t so lovely.

Something your family always had to do was attend charity events. It was probably one of the few things you liked doing, since many of those events raised money for great causes. So when you were invited to one to raise money for cancer research, you said yes immediately. It being organised by the Atlético de Madrid foundation didn’t matter to you. But for the press…it was a different story.

“Hi, it’s nice meeting you”.

You turned to see it was Álvaro Morata, the player who presided the event, saying hello to you.

“Thank you, it’s nice meeting you too”.

“I heard about you and Pedri…sorry if it’s too informal of me to say this”. “It’s ok, don’t worry”.

“So…you two are really together?”

“Yes”, you said, blushing.

“Good. He’s a good guy. I’ll see you around the Spain matches then”.

“You will”.

Other players were there too and you were introduced to all of them. Mario Hermoso, Marcos Llorente, …they were all very nice to you. But it was a younger player you had to sit next to at your table. One that you hadn’t met before but that introduced himself as Rodrigo Riquelme. However, that wasn’t what his teammates called him.

“Should I call you Rodrigo or Roro?”

“I feel I can’t ask someone of your station to call me such a nickname”.

You laughed seeing the Atleti player blushing. “I don’t mind. I’m not really that important”.

“You are the most important person here”.

“Depends on who you asked”, you shrugged.

It was lovely having someone young to chat with at such an event. You were usually surrounded by old politicians and entrepreneurs who bored you to death with their conversations. So you had a great time…Pedri didn’t have as much fun seeing all the posts on social media talking about how his girlfriend was being too friendly with another player.

He knew it was stupid. You were just chatting with Riquelme. Pedri knew you now and realised that was how you talked to his friends too. That was how you talked to Ferran, for example. It was nothing like how you talked to Pedri.

But still…it wasn’t nice to see so many people doubting your relationship. And, what was worse, insulting you.

“You look unhappy”, you said when you met him again in Barcelona. “Is it because of the articles? Nothing happened with Riquelme. I swear”.

“I know”, he sighed, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your forehead. “I just hate how people will try to find any excuse to try and hurt us”.

“We knew it was going to happen…”.

“It’s not nice anyway”.

“But we’re fine?”, you asked, worried.

“We’re fine. I missed you a lot”.

“I know. I missed you too”.

Knowing Pedri trusted you was so important and you felt you needed to prove you were worth that trust. So, even though you knew you were likely to get in trouble, you forgot about protocol and attended his match wearing his shirt.

It wasn’t even the most important match but when it ended, you went as close to the pitch as you could and called Pedri so he could go meet you. Every one of his teammates that walked past curtsied and called you two “your Majesties”. But you didn’t care. You looked around, noticing the cameras were all pointed at you, and kissed Pedri.

“Making sure everyone knows you’re just my princess?”, he whispered.

“Yes. And while we’re at it, everyone can also learn you’re my prince”.

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} OFC x Harvey Specter {Pt. 1}

I got the title from this song called Flatline by Jared Benjamin. I added it to this playlist of very Harvey Specter vibes if you'd like to listen. There will be multiple parts, around three so be sure to stick around for those. As always comment and tell me what you think, or pop by in my asks. Anyhoo enjoy my loves!

Word count ~ 10,619 (it is a very fast paced read I promise)

Warnings ~ Age gap, smut (18+), handjob, no real BDSM but Dom/Sub concepts, language, alcohol, anxiety/anxious thoughts, probably really inaccurate lawyer terms idk man.

Summary: Harvey has taken notice of the hardest working first year associate, Claudia Martin. Despite being petrified of the infamous closer, she tried her hardest to not let it get the best of her. Harvey has a few ideas on how to increase her confidence.

Tagging : @maxdamax @ashcosmo @rosedpetal (This is basically just dedicated to you three so I hope you enjoy it the most!)

~~~~~

“Alright, everybody stop,” Harvey announced. I put down my file and sat ramrod straight in my seat, eyes darting at the other associates as they put theirs away too. “We have been working on this case now for four hours and no one has brought me a single thing that I can use as evidence. Now, if someone doesn’t put a file in my hand in the next ten minutes, we’re going to lose. And those of you who don’t want to get stuck doing whatever bullshit Louis is going to punish you with, you better come up with something fast.”

I looked at the blue file in my hands, heart hammering in my chest as I saw Harvey leave out of the corner of my eye. With a deep breath, I pushed up out of my chair and followed after him. 

Circling around the office a few times, I made up reasons and excuses not to go see him. It was stupid, I knew that, but I didn’t want to bring him something and then immediately be called an idiot for bringing him shit he already knew.

I saw how he treated Mike. And Louis. Even Donna from time to time.

There were two things you did in this world: die, and respect Harvey Specter. As a first year associate in this god awful firm, you didn’t dare break his trust or waste his time. 

“Is Mr. Specter available for a moment?” I asked Donna. I hadn’t talked to her much, but I’ve heard her speak to Harvey a few times around the office. She was someone I wished I knew better, someone I wished I could ask for help, but I didn’t want to bother her either. 

“Yeah, he’s in his office going over the statements from the mock trial,” Donna smiled, pointing over her shoulder. I nodded, willing my feet to move in the direction of his office. I knocked before pushing the glass door opening, keeping my head down. 

“Claudia, now is really not a good-” “I have something for you,” we spoke at the same time. “I’m sorry to interrupt, I can come back and-” “Is that for the mock trial?” He asked, and I nodded. “Hand it over.”

I placed the file in his outstretched hand as he came around to sit on the corner of the desk. My hands were trembling with dread as his eyes raked over the words on the page. The lines in his forehead creased, eyes narrowing.

“Claudia, this is brilliant,” he had a very confused expression when his eyes met mine. “Where did you find this?”

“Well, I figured if Mrs. Thompson said that she didn’t pay her rent that month, because there wasn't money in her account, then there had to be some kind of a trail. Some clue. There was, but it was only an amount, and it didn’t say which account it came from. When I did some digging, I found out that she uses Capital One banking and when I looked at her bank statement-

“There was a draw for the exact amount that Mr. Saros used to bet on that game,” Harvey finished before I could get the words out of my mouth. “Claudia, this is genius. Come on, we’ve got a case to win.”

____

“...Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this compelling evidence reveals that Mr. Saros was in fact fraudulent and used his ex- wife’s funds to continue gambling. Thank you.” Harvey closed the argument, taking a seat besides Donna, who represented the client. Jessica looked to the opposing counsel as if to say ‘do you have anything?’. Louis had nothing. Not a sliver of hope. 

“Then it is decided, Mr. Saros will be charged with a misdemeanor and face a prison sentence of one year in county jail.”

With a crack of the gavel, the case was over, and applause rang through the office for Harvey and his team. I had a tiny smile on my face as I left the conference room to go back to the bullpen. There was an endless stack of reports to run, motions to file… it never ended when it came to Louis. And now that I was on the winning team I’m sure that-

“Claudia, where are you going?” Harvey called out. 

“Oh, I was just going back to my desk. Why, is there something that you need?” God I hope he didn’t need anything. I was sweating bullets by just standing next to him. 

“I just wanted to congratulate you on your first win,” he gave a small smirk. His brown eyes were sharp, but not as intense as they usually were. 

I flushed, “Well, it’s not really a real case.”

“No, it’s not. But seeing what you did today, how would you like one of your own?” He extended a blue file back to me, a stack of papers covered inside. I could feel the gaze of the other associates on me as I hesitantly took the file. 

“Mr. Spector, I’m honored, but I’m not-”

“Yes you are,” he cut me off. I bit my tongue. “You are a lawyer, Claudia. And you clearly have an outside the box approach to your tactics which we don’t see very often. I haven’t seen someone able to compile and order evidence like you since Mike came to work for me a decade ago. I’ll be supervising your case, you report to me with any questions you might have, but otherwise this is all you.”

My first case… given to me by Harvey Specter himself.

“I don’t know what to say,” I whispered. I flipped through the file, seeing that this wasn’t just some pro-bono case. This was against a big time client and the SEC. The SEC meant Sean Cayhill, who, from my understanding, was already on the rocks with this firm and has been for a very long time. 

“You can thank me when you win it,” he extended his hand, and I shook it, hoping that they weren’t sweaty. “Look over the file tonight and come ready to swing tomorrow morning.”

Harvey’s hand was warm, and significantly larger than mine. Everything about him was bigger than I was, especially his ego. And his personality. Lord help me…

My nod was the only confirmation that I would meet him there. As he walked out, I met some of the eyes of the associates and they scowled at me. At the file in my hand. At the fact that I hadn’t said a word the whole meeting today and then came up with the winning piece of evidence. And now I was working alongside Harvey. 

The infamous closer at Pearson-Specter-Litt. 

____

“Claudia, what’s wrong?” Donna startled me so bad I dropped my coffee on the floor with a shout. “Something’s really wrong.”

“Oh, it’s just you Donna,” I sighed in relief. I could feel the coffee seeping into my shirt and chilling against my skin. “Great.”

“What has you so skittish?” She asked, worry gracing her features. 

I didn’t want to admit that it was because of Harvey and the fact that I had to work alongside him on this case. I hadn’t been able to sleep much last night because I was up thinking about him, wondering how he’d handle this case himself. What he would do, how he would do it. Sure, I admired the guy, how could I not? He was a perfectionist and always found a way. I wish I had half the confidence he did. 

“It’s Harvey, isn’t it?”

“How did you know that? Nevermind, you’re Donna. But… Yes it’s because of Harvey.”

“Did he say something to you yesterday after you guys won the mock trial? I saw he handed you a case file, what was it all about?” “That's precisely what’s wrong,” I groaned, bending over and picking up the dropped paper cup. “He gave me a case of my own as a 'thank you' for finding the evidence that won the trial yesterday. I’m terrified of him, Donna. I-I don’t know how to act around someone with that kind of personality. He is so abrasive and forward and harsh and-”

“A total jackass?” She finished for me. 

I chuckled nervously, “I’m afraid to even think of that word in association with his name. I mean, how am I supposed to work alongside someone that intense? Plus, I’m a first year associate, how am I supposed to compete with what he as to offer and-”

“Hey, it’s okay. No need to get yourself all worked up, Claudia. Harvey is a lot of bark, and only some bite.” “That doesn’t make me feel better.”

“What I’m trying to say is that there is some heart inside that cold dead chest of his,” she smiled, a genuine, friendly smile. “For what it’s worth, I’ve never seen him give someone a case after a mock trial. Not even Mike. Up until yesterday I’m not even sure he knew you existed.” “Wish it was still that way,” I rolled my eyes, folding my arms against my chest.

“Claudia, listen to me. Yes, Harvey can be rude and obnoxious, but he is the best damn attorney in the state of New York. He didn’t get to the top by being nice and sweet. He was impressed with your willingness to bring him the evidence yourself. Now he knows he can count on you to get things done in a pinch when he needs them.” “I had that evidence for an hour,” I emphasized. “I was trying to build up the courage to give it to him long before he came and ripped us to shreds for not having anything. I just didn’t want him to think that it was a stupid idea or to be in a bad mood and turn me away because I definitely wouldn’t have done it at all after that. I don’t know how to deal with someone like him, Donna. What am I supposed to do? I should just give the case to Griffin or Thomas-”

“No no no. You are definitely not going to do that. That will only show Harvey that you aren’t serious about becoming a lawyer.”

“I am serious about becoming a lawyer.” I was mildly offended that she’d even say that to me. “Of course I want to be a lawyer, it's all I’ve ever wanted.”

“And Harvey will only know that if you work on this case with him.”

I inhaled and exhaled, leaning my head back and looking at the ceiling. “Fine.” “That’s my girl,” she grinned. “Now, come on. I have an extra dress you can borrow because I am sure as hell not letting you walk around covered in coffee stains.”

“I appreciate it, but I don’t think what you have will fit me.” Donna jerked her head over her shoulder and I followed to a closet in the back of the file room. When she opened it, it was like a full blown wardrobe. There were dresses and shoes and purses and hair supplies lining the walls. “Woah…” “Don’t ever underestimate the power of Donna,” she winked before rummaging through the office closet. 

After searching for a few moments, she pulled out a lovely royal blue dress that was, as she hinted at, a perfect size for me. How she knew that it would fit, I’ll never know. But I did know that I wouldn’t ever underestimate the power of Donna ever again. She’s magical. 

“Now, what do you say?”

“Thanks, Donna,” I smiled sweetly. 

“Actually I was looking for ‘you are an ethereal goddess who makes all my dreams and wishes come true’ but that works too,” I knew she was teasing, and I gave her a small shove of her shoulder. “Go get dressed, come back here and let me do your hair.”

“What’s wrong with the way it is?” I turned to look in the mirror on the back of the door and grimaced. “Oh…” My messy curls from yesterday looked more like a rat wrapped around a bunch of fishing line.

“Hurry up, Harvey will be back soon and I want you in that office, file in hand, ready to go when he gets here.”

I quickly shuffled to the bathroom and changed into the form fitting, very Donna-style dress. It didn’t look half bad, and I actually somewhat tolerated the dress. Normally I’d find a pants suit far more flattering and business appropriate than a dress, strictly because of the over sexualized nature of women's business clothing. 

I hate the corporate world. 

I did one more glance in the mirror before heading back to the break room to grab the file. I must’ve set it on the counter while I was pouring my coffee. Hopefully it wasn’t ruined. 

There was no blue file on the counter. Or the table. Or on top of the microwave or the fridge. I even checked inside the microwave. Nothing. It was nowhere. Oh shit.

“Do you want curls or for me to straighten-” “It’s gone,” there was a clear panic in my voice. “The file, it’s not in the break room, Donna. It’s gone.”

“How can it be gone?” 

“I-I don’t- I don’t know I thought I set it on the counter while I was getting coffee and it’s not there.” I felt a cold sweat break out onto my skin. My forehead was damp to the touch. 

“Okay, take a deep breath. Let’s go look again and then check your desk. Maybe someone found it and put it there, or maybe left it with me or Gretchen. It didn’t grow a pair of legs and walk away, we’ll find it.”

“I’m gonna get fired,” my voice was almost a silent whisper, tears building behind my eyes, prickling my nose. “Donna, Harvey is going to kill me.”

“Worst comes to worst we get a new file, Harvey will never know.”

“No no no he will because he had notes of his own on the papers in there.” “Shit,” she swore. “Let’s just go look.”

We speed walked through the bullpen, earning some odd looks as we practically sprinted through the office. She checked the break room for me again, and I went to my cubicle. Nothing, not a blue folder anywhere to be seen. 

Donna came up empty handed in the break room, checking with Gretchen on her way by Louis’s office. We met at her desk. Nothing. 

“Fuck fuck fuck this is bad.” My hands were shaking, heart thundering against my ribs. I felt faint, like I could’ve fallen to the floor at any moment. “Donna, what am I gonna do?”

“Maybe somebody mistook it as their own file,” Donna blurted out after a moment of silence. She took off towards the bullpen and I followed after her, right on her heels. She marched through there, unapologetic as she invaded the other associates' work spaces. 

Still nothing. No blue file labeled ‘Devlyn Inc. Vs. Fulton Dynamics’. 

“Where the hell could it be?” She murmured to herself. 

“What are you guys looking for?” An associate, Benson, asked. 

“Oh, you know, a leprechaun pissing pieces of gold,” Donna’s voice was full of sarcasm. “Claudia set down a file in the break room for three minutes and forty-two seconds and now it’s mysteriously disappeared. Know anything about it?”

“No,” he pressed his lips together. “Not really.” “Not really?”

“There are a million case files floating around this office, you really expect me to pay attention to every single one and where it’s going?” “As an associate of this firm, yes, actually. I do. Now I want to know if you know who took her file and I want to know right now. You have one chance to tell the truth, otherwise the bottom of my stiletto and your ass are gonna be great friends.”

Benson swallowed, “I truly don’t know. I’m sorry, I can keep an eye out for it. Is it the one Harvey gave Claudia yesterday?”

“Yes, and he needs it in twenty minutes,” Donna said, an undeniable urgency in her voice. “If you find it, do the right thing and give it back or so help me god you will find yourself jobless faster than you can get down on your knees and beg me to let you keep it.”

Donna beckoned me for her to follow and I did, my heart sinking and sinking into my stomach. It had to be around here somewhere. It had to be. 

I did another lap around, rummaging through all the drawers in the desk and thensome. Still nowhere. How could I be so stupid? So irresponsible? This is exactly why I didn’t want to take this case in the first place.

Despite all Harvey and Donna said the other day, I’m not ready to be a lawyer. Not really, anyway. I know I have my license and I’ve passed the Bar. I’ve done all the hard work, but this was… this was hell. A living nightmare. Not only was this firm constantly on the verge of collapsing, but it seemed like I made new enemies every other week by simply doing my job quickly, quietly, and efficiently. 

I don’t know how or why I piss everyone off all the time. I just do my work, I quite literally don’t bother another soul in this building unless I have to. Occasionally I’d ask Donna a question that she could ask Harvey or Mike to see what they thought about it. I’d never speak to them directly, just through her which didn’t make me feel good, either. 

I’d eat by myself, working through my meal. It took me two months of being here to finally use the break room because I was too nervous about taking the last tea bag or power bar from the cabinet. I just took a disposable coffee cup and filled it with tap water. And then kept that cup because I didn’t want to take the others because I figured other people needed them for coffee and I didn’t want them to be all gone-

“Claudia,” Donna interrupted my mild panic. “Harvey wants to see you.”

Oh no… no no no not yet god please not yet. I swallowed, or tried to at least; there was no moisture in my mouth whatsoever. I stood, knees trembling as I smoothed out the skirt of my dress.

Before I went on, she ran a brush through my hair, taking out the knots. It lay sleek and flat against my shoulders, a major difference from the low bun I always kept it in. My hair always made me so hot; I never understood how anyone could get anything done with it swaying in their face all day.

I could see him in his office, eyes staring us down as we rounded the corner. His gaze was locked on me and I felt my body tighten and constrict around a breath. Harvey was sitting on the corner of his desk, fingers toying with the cufflink on his left wrist.. 

“Hey, look at me,” Donna spoke softly, hands coming to my shoulders. “Give Harvey the truth, and nothing but. He will understand, if not, I will make him.”

I nodded.

When I pushed open his glass door, tension was thick in the air. My palms were clammy, still shaking. My mind was going a million miles a second. 

“What can I do for you, Mr. Specter?” I asked, trying to keep my cool despite almost throwing up. 

“Please tell me you have some good news about the case that I gave you,” he sighed, pushing off the desk and standing in front of me. 

Welp… here goes my career. 

“Actually, Mr. Specter there is something I need to-”

“You were looking for me, Harvey?” I whipped my head over my shoulder, seeing Griffin knocking on the door. 

“Yes, Griffin come on please, shut the door as well.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sir. I can come back and we can discuss the details of-”

“No, Claudia. Stay for a moment,” Harvey gave a firm nod, full attention slipping from me to my fellow associate. “Griffin, I see you have something for me.”

“Yes,” Griffin threw a wicked grin at me before handing over a blue file. I could feel the sick rise in my throat. That was my blue file. “I would just like to go over the details of my case with you to get your input.”

“Your case?” Harvey questioned, sharing a glance between me and Griffin. “Where did you get this? Who the hell gave you a case?”

“That’s not important. I was hoping we could actually-”

“No,” Harvey cut him off. “It’s very important, actually. Because I can recall that just last night this exact file, with my handwriting, was in Claudia’s hands. So whatever act you’re putting on, I suggest you cut the bullshit right now.” “Okay I found it in the breakroom,” Griffin rolled his eyes. “Maybe if she were a little more responsible, which she clearly isn’t because she left her documents in a public space, then she’d be more equipped to handle a real case. Like a real lawyer should.”

I could see the muscle in Harvey’s jaw clench and contract several times. 

“Claudia, care to explain how our case got in this thief’s hands?” “Thief?” “I had spilled coffee,” I started, taking a deep breath when Griffin cut me a gaze so threatening I almost crumbled to my knees. “I spilled coffee and Donna offered a change of clothes for me. I didn’t even notice I left it. When I came back it was gone.”

“Well, I think that about settles it. How about you get out of here before you cause yourself a real problem. And If I ever catch wind of you stealing another one of Claudia’s files, or anyones for that matter, I will personally make your life a living hell. Do you understand me?”

“Yes,” he ground his teeth, refusing to look at either of us. 

“Now get your ass back to your desk and pray to whoever you believe in that I don’t have you fired and disbarred for the shit you pulled today. Get the hell out of my sight.”

Griffin was out of there far faster than he walked in, head down, hands shoved in his pockets. I let out a shaky breath. 

“Are you okay?” Harvey asked me. “I’m so sorry,” I completely ignored his question. “Griffin was right, I was extremely irresponsible and shouldn’t have let that file out of my sight. If you want to give it to another associate I completely understand. Again, I am so sorry and understand that there are consequences to my actions for letting such important information go missing-”

“Claudia, slow down,” he eased. “It’s okay, you are not the one I am pissed at.”

“You’re not?” I didn’t understand why. “But- but I completely misplaced a case.”

“No,” Harvey shook his head. “No Griffin is the only one to blame. You spilled coffee, went to go get cleaned up, and he stole it. He should know better. And seeing that he clearly doesn’t, I know I’m right in my decision on who to bring onto this case with me.”

I could feel my blush creep up my neck. “I appreciate that, Mr. Specter.”

“Of course, Claudia. And please, call me Harvey.”

I just gave a subtle nod, taking the file from his hand. I followed his gaze from my face to my hair where he took a strand between his fingers, letting the end curl around his digit.

“I’ve never seen your hair so long,” He added, dropping it from his grip. My breath was caught in my throat. Words were vacant shadows in my mind as he surveyed the dress I was wearing. “I bet that’s Donna’s, isn’t it.”

I had to clear my throat before I could speak. “She wouldn’t let me walk around with coffee stains all day.”

“It looks good on you,” He complimented. Harvey’s eyes, again, went from my head to my toes. There was nothing I could do but fall victim to his… I didn’t know what to think of how he looked at me. Couldn’t decide if it was good or bad. 

“Time for the case then?” I needed to get his attention off of me. Now. I was flushed and losing my mind. Harvey didn’t really seem to acknowledge my words at all. 

“Sure.” Was all he gave me.

____

I barely escaped with the skin on my teeth after our consultation. No, he didn’t rip me to shreds, but he would not take his eyes off of me for even one second. It was so… so potent I couldn’t focus. It was almost lunch when Donna came in and saved my ass. 

I couldn’t have gotten out of there fast enough.

“So, how did it go?” Donna asked as I sat in my cubicle. When she came around, or maybe she just followed me, I didn’t know. 

I put my face in my hands. “It was a disaster, Donna. I was a stuttering mess and I kept forgetting everything I was going to say because he would not stop staring at me. Like, he would not stop.” “Well, you aren’t exactly ugly, Claudia,” she snickered. 

“Donna, this isn’t funny,” I groaned. “I’m being completely frank with you.”

“How can I be expected to work alongside him when I can’t stand being in an enclosed space with him for more than four minutes without turning into a bumbling idiot? It’s like he enjoys watching me get flustered.”

“Claudia, I think you are making this a bigger deal in your head than it actually is.” Donna came around and sat on my desk, crossing a knee over the other. “And besides, Harvey understands what it’s like to be a new associate. It can be nerve wracking, especially when you have Louis breathing down your neck.”

I chuckled gravely, “I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”

“You’ll figure it out.” “Why can’t you just tell me?” I whined as she stood up. 

“Because I am the Yoda to your Luke Skywalker. Wise you are, patience you must have, my young Padawan.”

“I am not a Jedi who is going on a self discovery journey to start using the Force,” I countered. “I am a nervous wreck who can’t handle being alone with Harvey Specter.”

“Then you need to get over it because Harvey is not going to berate you on your first case!” She argued.

“Did you not hear what he said to Griffin? Or-or to Thomas when he suggested that we consider taking the deal that Mr. Saros had offered during the mock trial? He cracked them wide open and left them to bleed. What about with Mike? How many times has he almost sent him to the curb for not being able to find what Harvey needs?”

“Mike is different and you know it,” Donna lowered her voice. “Plus he always says shit like that to light a fire under his ass. Harvey can see that you are nervous to work with him. He isn’t going to hang you out to dry, I promise. He stood up for you, Claudia, in a way I’ve only seen him do with me and Mike. You know how much he cares about us.”

“Well, yeah of course. But you’ve worked for him for fifteen years and Mike almost seven now. You have a relationship with him and established trust. How am I supposed to have that with him when I can’t even look him in the eye?” “It comes with time, Claudia,” she rubbed my shoulder. “But if there is anything I can say to get you to trust the process, Harvey is loyal, almost to a fault sometimes. He will stop at nothing to make sure the people he cares about are taken care of. I can see that he wants that for you because if he didn’t, he wouldn’t have given a shit if Griffin stole the file or not.”

Donna walked away after smoothing down some of the hair on my head, disappearing behind the corner. I let out a huff. She was right, I was being a little over dramatic.

Harvey had a reputation, though. How was I supposed to know if- no. This is unrelated to anything going on. Sort of. I just need to focus on the case. 

I pulled out the files and looked over them again, compiling all the notes into one space for easy recall. As I was looking through it, I found a loophole in one of the contracts that unbound our client from having to give up half of her company.

____

I paced up and down Harvey’s office, tapping my file in my hand as I went through all my key points in my head for today’s trial. I needed to lure, or bait rather, the witnesses into my questions to get them to admit to trespassing on our clients property. We had everything we needed; security footage, witnesses to testify on our behalf… Everything was all lined up. I just needed to blow it. 

I could do this, right? I had only spent all night doing a fake run of how today would go in my mirror, but then again anything could happen when I got into that courtroom today. Maybe they had another leg on us, maybe there was another witness they had to testify against us.

God dammit, if I screwed up today I wouldn’t get another case. Probably not ever again unless I packed up all my shit and moved to Iowa. 

Having Harvey there didn’t make me feel better. I thought it would, but as we worked together I realized he only made me more nervous. I couldn’t help it, he just looked at me this way I couldn't describe. It was incredibly annoying, I don’t know how Mike does it. Or Donna. Or Jessica or Louis or-

Jesus focus, Claudia. I rubbed my eyes with my thumbs. Just focus focus focus. I’ve been over it a million times. I could do this. I didn’t have a choice, court was in less than half an hour. 

“Claudia,” Harvey ripped me from my concentration, making me jump. “Sorry to startle you. Are you ready for today?” “Not really,” I admitted. “I am kind of freaking out, to be honest.”

“It’s okay,” he eased me to sit next to him. “What are you so nervous for?”

I chuckled, “Everything.” “Okay,” he gave a half-hearted laugh. “What specifically? Just name one thing that you are worried about.”

“I don’t know- forgetting cross examination questions? Screwing up the order so it doesn’t lead him into our trap? A billion things could go wrong and I’m not sure what to do if I freeze or stutter. What if the jury or the opposing counsel laughs at me?”

“That is not gonna happen, Claudia,” Harvey reassured. “You have prepared some amazing questions, you’ve got this in the bag.” “You know, I much prefer to stay in the background and do research. I don’t think I’m cut out to handle court stuff this is-”

“Hey,” he said so softly I almost didn’t hear him. He grabbed my trembling hand and held it between his own. My body went completely rigid, chest puffing in and out with heavy breaths. “You are going to do great today, I know it, Claudia. You are prepared, capable, and even more prepared. This is always what you’ve wanted to do, isn’t it?” I just nodded. Over the past week and a half of working together, I had told him what made me want to be a lawyer in the first place. About how I saw my best friends’ parents' business completely ruined by a group of robbers and their insurance did nothing to help them.

It made me so sad for them, made me feel so sick that I knew I had to do something to help them. I did my research and then brought it to them. They brought it to their lawyer and ended up getting a settlement for far more than they were ever gonna get. All because of me and my discovery that I made on my computer when I was thirteen.

“Okay. Think back to teenage Claudia for a moment. I bet she dreamed of being in this exact position. Where she can help people and give the sorry bastards who put them there a taste of their own medicine. Well, Claudia, here you are. Your very first case. Your very first helping hand. Your very first entrance into the world of the law. And you are going to absolutely shake up those witnesses, blindside them so hard they won’t have a choice but to tell the truth. This is your moment, Claudia’s moment. Don’t let fear take it from you, okay?” Again, all I could do was nod. And think about how warm his hand was in mine. We stood and he let go, leading me out of the office and down to his car waiting for him in front of the building. Ray, his driver, greeted me sweetly as I settled into the back seat with Harvey.

I flipped through my cards over and over and over on our way to the court house. Harvey snatched them from me. “Hey!” “You know the material,” he gave me a pointed look, sliding them in the breast pocket of his jacket. 

“I know but-” “There is no but,” he shrugged. “Have just one ounce of confidence, Claudia. Trust yourself.”

All of whatever I had been reading was swept from my mind as he placed his palm on my knee. I hadn’t realized it was bouncing up and down until he pressed against it to stop its movements. I tried to sit still, but I just started picking at my nails instead. 

“Claudia,” he said in a stern, commanding voice. I stopped my fidgeting, laying my hands flat in my lap. “Good, just relax. Everything will be alright.”

Highly doubtful. He was playing a dangerous game, and we both knew it. But neither of us said anything as he left his hand there the entire car ride. 

____

“After the conclusion of today’s trial, the jury here finds Fulton Dynamic guilty of trespassing and breaking and entering with intent to steal inside information.”

I felt the tension deflate from my body, eyes fluttering shut as the judges whacked the wooden disk on his stand. He said something, but I couldn’t even hear over the roar in my ear. Holy shit we won…

“Claudia,” Harvey shook my shoulder. I snapped my eyes to him. “Come on, let's get out of here.”

He didn’t have to tell me twice. 

I rested my head back against the seat, eyes focused on the window outside so I wouldn’t throw up. Man did I hate getting car sick every time I looked at my phone when in a car. The city lights were bright and fierce, unrelenting all hours of the day. Why on god's green earth did I decide to move to New York? Out of all the places I could’ve gone to work as an associate in this state, why did I choose the city? I hate the city. I’ve always hated the-

“Yoo-hoo,” I heard from my side. I lifted my exhausted head and gave Harvey a look. “Did you hear anything I said?”

‘Oh… n-no I’m sorry,” I stiffened, giving him my full attention. “What were you talking about?”

“I was just saying that you did a great job today, Claudia. You kicked ass in there,” he smiled.

“Thanks, Mr. Specter.” I just let out a sigh.

“You don’t think so?”

“Not really.” Anxiety swirled in my chest. Tears pricked my eyes and nose. 

“Why not? Claudia, you gave one of the best cross examinations I think I’ve ever seen. And the way you handled Cayhill? Defended Devlyn from those accusations? It was masterful.”

“It doesn’t feel like it.”

Silence hung between us. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. “You did great today.”

“I was a complete idiot when I was defending Devlyn. I was way too animated and let my emotions get the best of me. For Christ's sake Judge Peterson gave me a warning.”

“I want you to take a guess at how many warnings judges give me when I’m the one in there leading the case.”

“You’re Harvey Specter, of course you… get a lot.”

“You right, I do get a lot. But that isn’t a bad thing. And I’ve been doing this a hell of a lot longer than you-” “That’s the problem,” I snapped. “You have been doing this for seventeen years and I’ve been doing it for ten days. I’ve barely got my toe in the water and I’ve already shown other lawyers and firms that I can’t keep my cool.”

“Claudia, you are passionate. I don’t see that as a huge problem in the courtroom. There needs to be a level of pushback from attorneys because if you, of all people on someone’s legal team, aren’t going to fight back, then you might as well be fired. Because you are the only person some people have hope for. You have to be aggressive and assertive sometimes to get the job done.”

“I don’t know how to do that.”

“I am going to teach you,” Harvey’s words completely short circuited my brain. 

“What do you mean?”

“Claudia, I think you’re going to be a great lawyer, even without my help. I know you struggle with confidence and that is all I want to help you with. To get some leverage over these other associates so you can climb that ladder.”

“I can’t just magically pull a wagon load of confidence out of my ass overnight,” I shook my head, folding my hands tightly together. “I don’t see how you can help me.”

The car pulled up outside the building and Harvey let out a sigh. Great. Now I’ve pissed him off, too. That’s exactly what I needed to do was piss off Harvey Specter after a great win. In all honesty, it had been a good day. I didn’t fumble the ball like I was going to, but this was completely taking away from them.

My door opened. Harvey looked down at me from outside and extended his hand. When did he get out of the car? I hesitantly took it, getting out and shutting the door behind me.

“Claudia,” Harvey started. “You need to learn to let go. To put the bad moments behind you.” “I can’t.” “Which is why you and I are going to go back up there and have a drink. Get to know each other a little bit so we can start building that trust. I know I intimidate you, and I try like hell to be as calm as I can around you, but one day Louis or Jessica or Donna is going to come into my office and give me some bad news. You might be there and see how I handle it. You might not, but I don’t want you to be afraid of that happening to you.”

“And how can I be sure that if I come up with a plan one day, and it falls through and goes to shit, you won’t flip out on me or fire me or-or-”

“Because I won’t. I give you my word. But I need yours as well.”

“Need my word, why?” “I need to know that you won’t think I’m a monster if you’re in the room and I lose my cool.”

I’ve never thought Harvey was a monster to begin with. I’ve always admired his ability to shut off his feelings and get the dirty work done. Of course I’ve seen that side of him a time or two, but never catastrophic like some of the stories I’ve heard from the third and fourth years.

“You have my word.”

The elevator chime brought me out of my spiraling momentarily to walk to Harvey’s office. The firm was empty, not even Jessica was here. He led me to his office and got to work on the drinks. My eyes wandered from him to the view through the window. This was the only part of the city I might’ve let myself enjoy from time to time. 

“Donna was right, you do have a lot of music,” I noted, taking in the wall filled with vinyl records. She mentioned it when I was caught with my head buried in a book in the library, some random Beatles song blasting so loud she could hear it down the hall. 

“You’re just now noticing that?” “Well, I haven’t exactly been in your office for anything other than to work on this case so… no I guess I never really noticed.”

“You can pick something to listen to, if you’d like.” He was gonna let me touch his records? This place was like a museum; autographed basketballs and baseballs, art hanging on the wall. “Or you can just stare at it.”

I flushed, picking up a record at random and handing it to him. In exchange, he handed me a glass a third full of whisky. I smelled it, it kind of made me scrunch my nose. I didn’t drink often; most of the time I was too tired to even feed myself let alone consume alcohol.

When I took a sip, I actually didn’t mind the taste. It was smooth, simple in flavor and didn’t burn too bad. Quite nice, for all it’s worth. 

There was a couch along the wall of records that I fixed myself on, Harvey taking the time to remove his tie and lay it across his desk before sitting across from me on one of the chairs. I toed off my pumps and set them on the floor beside the table. God damn did my feet hurt. 

“Do you do this with all the new associates?”

“What do you mean?” He asked, taking a seat in one of the chairs while I took up the couch. 

“I mean, when you think they’re ready, do you give them a case and help them get their foot in the door?”

“No, no I don’t,” Harvey admitted. “Louis is in charge of the associates. You know that.”

“Yes,” I nodded. “But I just thought that there was some deal between you guys: you have a mock trial with the new associates, whichever team wins gets to give a case to the best performing associate.”

Harvey laughed. I didn’t even know he knew how to do that. “Oh, Claudia, you really are that innocent, aren’t you?” My throat collapsed on itself. What did I say?

“Relax,” he set his glass down, swallowing his sip. “Yes, we do a fake trial every year for the first years, but we don’t just give them cases when they win. No one in their right mind would give a first year associate, fresh out of law school, the time of day. Normally they have to prove themself down the line, after years and years of loyalty to this firm to get their first case. And it’s usually pretty easy pro-bono shit.” I had to stop and think for a moment before I could speak. “You keep saying normally, usually… What are you saying?”

“What I’m saying, Claudia, is that in my decade plus of working here, I’ve never seen an associate who busts their ass quite like you. Who takes every ounce of bullshit from Louis and turns it into the Mona Lisa.”

“I think that everyone does tha-”

“No,” he cut me off. A stern look in his eyes, lips in that crooked line. “No they don’t. Not like you. You put your head down, get into it, and don't come up until you’ve found what you were looking for and thensome. You go above and beyond every time. You don’t go to Louis begging for more work, he brings it to you, and only you, because he knows he can count on you. Which means I know I can count on you, too.”

I honestly didn’t know what to say. I kind of just wanted the ground to swallow me whole. To make me evaporate and never see the light of day again. 

“Thank you, Mr. Specter. But I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not but I am not very good in the spotlight. I don’t do well with… all of this.”

“I know, but I’m glad that you are trying anyway,” his smile was very charming. In a way that made his eyes crinkle. “So, besides giving a hell of a cross examination, what else do you like to do for ‘fun’?” 

“Well, for starters, your definition of fun, and mine, are going to be very different. I am a very solitary person, I don’t need to be around people to have a good time. Most of the time I prefer to go do things by myself because I find when I ask, people already have plans, or they’re faking having plans so they don’t have to hang out with me. I can’t tell what is the truth and what isn’t so I stopped asking… that was totally not what you asked. Sorry, I didn’t mean to ramble.”

“Go ahead, talk about whatever you want. I won’t judge you.”

A small part of me believed that he wouldn’t. A tiny, microscopic part. 

“There is nothing like the feeling of getting lost in a good book. I’m a complete sucker for a cliche rom-com where the bad guy gets the good girl.”

Harvey let out a dramatic puff of air, laughing into the space around us. 

“You said you wouldn’t judge!” I chuckled. 

“I’m not, it’s just lame. Come on, what do you really like to do for fun?”

“That is what I really like to do for fun,” I let my hand fall to the cushion beside me. “I told you, I am not a very interesting person. I don’t have time for a whole lot of anything other than working here so… Most of my hobbies have been put on the back burner through grad school and working nonstop.”

“If you could be any type of sea creature, what would you be?” 

“What does that literally have anything to do with anything we were just talking about?”

“It doesn’t,” Harvey smiled. “I’m just curious.”

“I don’t know, a jellyfish?”

“Really?” He questioned, one brow rising higher than the other. “I’d be a great white shark.”

“Of course you would,” I snickered. “Harvey Specter, the Great White of New York. If you wanted to be a real predator that no one fucks with, you should be an Orca.” “A whale?” “The killer whale,” I corrected. “They put sharks in the obituary for fun, you know. They sink yachts for fun, too. If you really want to be on top, be an Orca. No one in their right minds fucks with an Orca. They’re intelligent and not afraid of anything.”

“Aww, you think I’m intelligent and not afraid of anything?” Harvey mewled. 

“Well, duh you’re Harvey Specter.” Everyone knew it. Harvey was the baddest cat in the sky, you didn’t approach him without giving him your respect. Cause if you didn’t, a whole boat load of shit will be coming your way. 

Harvey rolled his eyes. “Well, I hate to break it to you, but there is more to Harvey Specter than the title my name comes with.”

“Of course,” I agreed. “Harvey Specter, badass attorney and the best closer New York has ever seen, killer whale of the corporate world.” Harvey couldn’t keep his laugh inside, sending the rumbling noise into the office. I made Harvey laugh, and I have for the past however many minutes. 

“You left out the part where I’m devastatingly attractive and charming,” his smirk was nothing short of either of those things. Devastating and charming. It cut through me like a hot knife. I knew I blushed because his eyes went to my cheeks and that spot at the base of my throat that always gives it away. 

My fingers tapped away anxiously at the glass in my hands, fingernails rattling against its crystal surface. 

“It’s late I should… I should go.” Great, now I’m flustered and stuttering. As quickly as I could, I threw my heels back on and reached for my coat. 

“Claudia-”

“Thank you for the drink, and for all your help on the case,” I hurried out, trying to not let my voice break and give away all the things I wanted to say. “Have a good night, Mr. Specter.”

“Claudia.” His voice commanded, stopping my movements. I held still on the couch, drinking in his stare. “Stay.”

“Mr. Specter I really should-”

“Harvey,” he bit out a little harshly. “Stop calling me Mr. Specter.”

“I’m sorry. Harvey, it’s late.” He just nodded, taking a sip from his glass. “And?”

“It’s been a long day and I think we should both go and get some much deserved rest,” I spoke quietly, resuming my nail picking from earlier. 

“Do you really want to leave?” 

It was such a loaded question. Yes, absolutely I wanted to fucking leave. But there was something deep in his eyes, deep in his voice that made me want to stay and explore. My heart was hammering in my chest. I couldn’t keep my eyes off him, no matter how much I wanted to look away. It was impossible. 

“I don’t think you do,” he answered for me. “I told you I was going to help build your confidence.”

You never told me how, jackass, I thought. I swallowed, nothing going down, but I did it anyway. Harvey threw back what was left of his whisky and sat back, knees far apart, fingers drawing patterns on the arm rests of the chair. 

“Come here, Claudia.” What? “You heard me.”

Shit, I must’ve said it out loud. If I thought my heart was racing before, it sure as hell was halfway around the world now. Legs trembling, I rose. Why the fuck did I stand up? It wasn’t too late to make a beeline for the door and pray he didn’t catch up. Then again, it wasn’t like I could escape him, we worked in the same fucking building. On the same floor. 

When I came to a halt, a few feet in front of him, he held out his hand, palm up. As I put my fingers in his grasp, there was nothing I could do. Harvey yanked me to him, other hand catching my hip as I collapsed into him with a yelp. 

“Straddle my thigh,” he ordered. Something about the way his voice went down my spine made me obey. With extreme hesitance, I moved one leg on each side of his, lowering myself. I didn’t dare put all of my weight down. And he knew it because his hands came up to my hips and forced me all the way. 

“Sir, what are you-”

“Do not call me Sir unless you are ready to deal with those consequences.” His fingers dug into the exposed skin on my thigh, eyes full of his pupils. 

“Harvey, what are you doing? We shouldn’t be doing… whatever this is,” I tried to defuse the situation as best I could, but there was such a seriousness written in his features I wasn’t sure I could sway him. Maybe I didn’t want to, either. 

“How does it feel?” He asked.

I blinked, “H-How does what feel, Harvey?”

He smiled at the use of his name on my tongue. I hadn’t really ever called him by his first name.

“To have one of the most powerful men in the city underneath you, bent to your will?”

When I did look away from his face, to where I was seated on his lap, I felt my stomach start to twist and mold into something new. I did have Harvey Specter underneath me. Granted, at his own command, but still…

“And before you even think about it, no. I don’t do this with all the other associates.”

“Then why me?” My voice was a barely there whisper, gaze averted from his until his thumb caught my chin and made me look into his eyes. 

“Because I see something else in you that I don’t think anyone realizes. And I know the world will never see it unless you start believing in yourself and take control of the cards you’ve been dealt.”

I took a moment to steady my breath, and my uncontrollable thoughts. “And you think that whatever this is… you think this is going to help with that?”

Harvey shrugged, “I am in no way forcing you to be here, am I?”

My blush came creeping back. Of course he wasn’t forcing me to be here. I shook my head, my face just inches from his. I felt oddly relaxed under his touch.

“And I am not stopping you from getting up and leaving right now. It’s your choice, Claudia, but I think you want to be here, on my lap. Because if you didn’t, you would’ve already left.”

God dammit I hated this cocky son of a bitch. Was he right? Yes. Of fucking course he was. But the way his mouth curled up was dangerous. This was dangerous, and utterly a horrible idea. Was I really about to sit here, on one of my bosses thighs? He did look pretty good under me, shirt unbuttoned the top three, cologne wafting into the air every time he moved his head. 

Harvey’s hands came back to my hips as he leaned up.

“So, are you going to get up and leave? Or, are you going to ride my thigh while I tell you how pretty you look?” His breath tickled my ear, his lips trailing the space just below. I couldn’t help the shudder that went through my whole body, and I knew Harvey felt it because he cooed.

As I adjusted myself, I couldn’t help the movement, his breath on my skin was making me flutter, Harvey moved my hips back and forth. I felt the air take from my throat. The material of his pants against my core wracked through me. So unexpectedly I found myself pressing closer to him so I wouldn’t fall off. 

“That’s it, Claudia…” His voice was sickly sweet with praise. Harvey moved to fiddle with the front of his pants, and when I went to look, he caught my chin. “Eyes up here, sweetheart.”

“Harvey this… this isn’t the best idea,” I kept trying to reason. Not necessarily with him, but with myself. Obviously he wanted it, so why was I trying to convince myself to go?

“So?”

“This could have some serious implications if we don’t-”

He laughed against my neck, placing a few kisses right over where I always blushed. “Claudia, Claudia, Claudia. This is exactly what I have been talking about. You are wound far too tightly with concern. You need to let go, need to be out of control with something in your life.”

“Let me guess, that something is going to be you?”

“Only if you want it to be,” he said. “Look Claudia, I know we don’t exactly always see eye to eye on things, and we sure as hell haven’t really worked together, but that doesn’t make me less sure about this. About you. If you are having doubts, and this isn’t what you want, then walk away and we never have to talk about it ever again. But I think there is a part of you that really likes seeing me under you. That likes knowing you can make me this way.”

“And what if I do?” Harvey was right. God dammit he was right and he knew it. I looked and saw just what I had been doing to him. 

“Then just let yourself enjoy it because I know I want to.”

Man, he was quite the smooth talker. My resolve crumbled and I gave in. No, I didn’t give in, I made the choice to let this happen. Harvey wanted this too, for some reason known only to the great mother and beyond. This was not going to end well, I don’t know why I thought so, but I just know this is going to cause a problem down the road. Maybe it’ll be a good one, maybe it won’t– Jesus I need to get out of my head before I start thinking into oblivion. 

Harvey rolled his eyes, hand cupping the side of my face before his lips met mine. The gasp I let out… I could feel his smile. He guided my hand into the front of his pants, but did nothing else. Just left it there. 

When I tried to pull away, he bit my lip and pulled me right back in. Finger pressing into the front of my throat. In a commanding, possessive way that made my stomach burn with desire. 

I slowly traced around the outline of him. My fingers were trembling so fiercely that I wasn’t sure they were moving at all. As best I could control them, I made my way up to the waistband of his briefs, just… testing the waters. 

“You’re so close to where I need you,” Harvey purred, eyes looking at my surly swollen lips. “Go on, sweetheart, don’t be shy.”

I guess there really was no turning back. As my hand ventured further, I ducked down and swept my tongue into his mouth. He approved very enthusiastically. Harvey continued to guide my hips back and forth and back and forth across his thigh. All too gently, all too slowly. One of his hands kept working my hip, the other camp up around my throat.

How could he know that was one of my weakest sides? It didn’t prevent any air, but it was a firm reminder. 

His breath broke our searing lips when I moved my thumb over the tip of his cock. Harvey’s grip tightened on my throat and a noise slipped through my mouth. There was little I could do to keep my eyes from lulling back, head going with it. He made an effort to weave his fingers between my locks and pulled. A lot harder than I think he actually meant to. 

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he murmured against my ear, sending goosebumps down my neck and arms. “I can’t help myself when you make such pretty noises. I’ll be gentle.”

I huffed out a laugh, as best I could with the straight against my neck. “I don’t mind.”

“Those are dangerous words, Claudia,” he warned, bringing my head back up. His eyes were dark in a way I couldn’t process in that moment. His lips were red and his hair was a mess from my fingers. 

I tugged at him as emphasis for my earlier words. “I don’t mind you being rough with me.”

His eyes closed, and his jaw clenched. I continued my motions, slow and long, drawing divine noises from him. Even with his hands away from my hips, I still moved them, picking up pace with my hand. I took the liberty to occupy his mouth with my own, hopefully filling him with euphoria. It was fast, and quite messy. My hair was sticking to the back of my neck with sweat, and I could taste it on his skin when I couldn’t help but trail my tongue up his throat. 

Harvey murmured my name, but I didn’t stop. I couldn’t now, not with the constant moans and praise from his tongue. ‘Just like that sweetheart’, ‘I know that pretty mouth of yours will feel so much better wrapped around my cock’, ‘Can’t wait to take you apart’.

With his release, warm and wet over the back of my hand, he stilled my hips. Fingers digging in. At some point my skirt rode up, or he tugged it over my ass, and his nails left long lines of scratches. I hissed, and Harvey was breathing deep.

Harvey’s grin was nothing short of animalistic as he looked at where my hand still connected us. “Look at that, sweetheart. Look how well you’ve done.”

I could do nothing to keep my blood from rushing to my face. When I moved my hand– not entirely sure if I should get up and clean it off– Harvey snatched my wrist. 

“Open.”

I was going to question him, but I watched his eyes flick over my surely swollen lips. I flushed deeper. And deeper again as he moved them into my mouth. Bitter, but not in a bad way. And If I had been thoroughly fucked, I’d undoubtably find it irresistible. 

“Good girl, Claudia.”

There would be no way to recover from hearing that. I shuddered, so hard I clamped his thigh between my own, and whimpered. Like I had never before. And his stare… the way his eyes watched my tongue circle over my fingers. As they watched me swallow him down. 

“I bet you didn’t even realize,” he tilted his head, tucking hair behind my ear, flopping it behind my shoulder. 

“Realize…what?”

“How you took control. How confident you were with your hand… with that wicked tongue of yours. It was like it was second nature for you, wasn’t it? I didn’t even have to tell you to keep moving your hips. You just did it.”

I didn’t even know I was doing most of it… It all just happened. At some point or another. 

“I wouldn’t say that I was confi-”

“Yes,” he interrupted. “You were. And that feeling, of being in control, is what you need to feel when you are in the courtroom. You were able to do it here, with me, to me. It was the most powerful and direct I’ve ever seen you.”

“Sex and being a lawyer aren’t exactly the same thing.”

“No, but you were able to feel safe and let yourself go. To release all that potential and work miracles.”

“You’d consider me giving you an orgasm a miracle?”

He chuckled, leaning so his lips brushed against mine. “Your hands do miraculous things to me, Claudia. I don’t normally give myself to someone the way I did with you. I didn’t have any second thoughts about it because I knew how willing you’d be to please me. And god damn do I love watching you pleasure yourself for me.”

In the minutes that followed, Harvey stood me up and straightened out my skirt. He did give me some hand sanitizer until I could go to the bathroom. I watched as he tucked in his shirt, buttoning his pants and rolling the sleeves back up his arms. 

“Harvey?”

“Yes, Claudia?” His voice was much more mellow. 

“How often is this… you know. Gonna happen?”

He smirked, “Why, already picturing yourself on your knees for me?”

I wasn’t, but I sure as hell was now. One thing that I needed to learn to do was control my facial reactions because judging by the way his stepped closer, he could see that I was, in fact, picturing his hand in my hair while he forced me to take it down my-

“Oh sweet sweet Claudia,” he chuckled, tilting up my chin. “You really are that eager to please me.”

“I was just wondering when you were going to return the favor.”

Harvey seized my throat, tighter than he had before. “Don’t you worry, sweetheart. I will have my name dripping from your tongue for so long you will forget it completely and beg for mercy. And when you beg for it, just know that you won’t get it until I say you do.”

[dirtytomatoedwrites]

I WAS NEVER THERE - PART 1

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

Summary: Steve returned to the 1940s to find the life he thought he wanted. But desire has its own plans—and he’s found someone who knows exactly how to feed it.

Paring:  Steve Rogers/Reader Steve/Peggy

Warning: 18+ mature dark themes. Smut, Drama, Romance, BitterSweet / Possessive / Obsessive behaviour, Cheating.

Strictly 18+ No Minors to Interact. 

Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Steal my writing or the writing of others and karma will get ya.

Dinner parties always bore you. 

The fakery. The snobbery. The same faces. The same drivel. Did you know so-and-so’s son just got accepted into Harvard? Did you know so-and-so is engaged? It was always the same stories, recycled, retold on the last Friday of every month. Births, deaths, marriages, followed by a barrage of questions about your personal life.

You had slipped up once and made the mistake of mentioning to an acquaintance that you were single. Since then, these monthly shindigs came with an onslaught of introductions, with someone constantly trying to pair you with their son, their friend, or even their grandson. Their personalities, just like their names, blended together in bland tedium. 

Tonight, you were huddled in a corner with Nancy, trying your best to avoid your latest suitor, Harold—the accountant from Scottsdale, when Nancy gave you a quick jab with her elbow.  

“Peggy’s arrived,” Nancy hissed. “And she’s with Steven”. Your eyes followed the direction of her not so subtle head nod.

“Ah yes, the infamous fiancé back from the dead. What year did he supposedly time travel from? Twenty nineteen?” you whispered back, sarcasm thick in your tone as you scanned the crowd.

You had overheard snippets of conversations over the last few weeks about a love story transcending time and space. Brave and valiant, Steven had apparently given up a life full of every technological advancement imaginable all for Peggy, the love of his life. 

Naturally, your mind reeled with disbelief. What kind of man would sacrifice a future brimming with endless possibilities just to return to his past? Was a domestic life with Peggy really that rewarding?

You thought back to your own past relationships—acquaintances and budding romances alike that had barely stayed faithful or fizzled out over trivialities. Men who chose women based on looks, status, or in your case who your father was.

The more you considered Peggy and Steven’s so-called love story, the more absurd it all seemed. He had to be a fool, you reasoned—a handsome one, no doubt, because despite her pretense otherwise, Peggy was always a sucker for a pretty face.

You weren't surprised when your gaze finally landed on the blonde colossus of a man standing next to Peggy. His perfectly styled blonde hair and the way his suit complemented Peggy’s cocktail dress made him look more like a model than anything else. Peggy stood beside him with a smug, sugar-coated grin that was enough to make your teeth ache.

“Wow...He’s something, isn’t he?" Nancy whispered, clearly smitten by the man who shook the hands of Peggy’s friends with a cordial smile.  "I was never one to believe in angels, but he’s made a believer out of me.”

"I’m sure he has.” you chuckled.

“Oh, stop it! He’s handsome, charismatic—”

“Prince Charming, right out of a fairy tale…”

“I know you’re being sarcastic.” Nancy said with a ruffle, “But he could have nothing, not a single dime to his name, and I’d choose him over all the Harolds of the world.” her smile turned catty. ‘Wouldn’t you?”

You could feel her eyes gauging your reaction. “Wouldn’t you choose him over all the mugs pulling at your skirt?”  

You felt her gaze lingering, waiting for your response, and you knew what she was doing—trying to provoke you. It was for this very reason why you always declined Nancy's invitations for brunch, her shopping trips to Barney's or god forbid, her weekend socials in the Hamptons. Nancy possessed a mean streak unlike any other that made her delight in poking fun at others.

Even with her limited knowledge about your personal life, she always managed to unleash her mean streak at every opportunity, often without any provocation.

She turned her attention back to the adoring couple and sighed while twirling a lock of her auburn hair around her finger, her massive engagement ring glinting obnoxiously in the light.

"I don’t know… If it were me and Harold were my only option, I'd be jealous."

“It's quite comical to me how you think looks equate to a good personality?” you replied coolly. “Have you ever stopped to consider why people make certain life choices? Because I have.”

For once, Nancy was quiet, and you savored the brief silence. Laughter erupted nearby as someone cracked a joke, Peggy’s laugh ringing out—loud and genuine. But when your gaze landed on Steven, a strange chill crept up your spine. He was smiling, but his eyes were distant, the warmth never quite reaching them.

“He could live anywhere, be anyone,” you murmured, almost to yourself. “So much power and freedom lies in Steven Rogers hands and yet he chose to come back here. To the past.” You paused, letting the weight of that choice sink in. “And for what? To chase ghosts, to piece together a life long dead and gone?” You shook your head, feeling the oddness of it all. "Can you imagine clinging to that forever?"

Your voice softened, “Sooner or later, he’ll have to face reality—that his happiness is nothing but an illusion.” You looked back at Nancy, meeting her gaze, steady and unblinking. “So no, Nancy, I don’t envy them. I pity them.”

Suddenly you felt a prickle at the back of your neck. A strange, electric pull. You looked ahead and saw piercing blue eyes locked onto yours.

Steven.

Had he heard your conversation?

It seemed impossible—he was all the way across the crowded room, surrounded by Peggy’s friends, and the jazz number blaring from the gramophone drowned out most conversations.

But somehow, his gaze cut through the noise, piercing and direct. It was as if he hadn’t just overheard your words but had found your analysis… amusing. And then, against all odds, he smiled—a slow, deliberate curve of his lips.

There was something in that smile, a peculiar weight that felt almost like acknowledgment. It caught you off guard, and you couldn’t look away.

“Are you okay?” Nancy’s voice snapped you out of your daze.

You blinked, dragging your eyes from Steven. “Hm? Yes, of course, I’m fine, silly."

“You sure?” she pressed. “I called your name several times. You looked like you were in a trance.”

“It’s so stuffy in here, don’t you think?” You said quickly as you handed your half-drunk glass of champagne to a nearby waiter. “I swear, this heat will be the death of me,” you laughed.

His gaze was still on you, making it impossible to breathe.

“If anyone misses me, I’ll be on the balcony,” you said, not waiting to hear Nancy’s response as you ushered your way through a sea of suits and cocktail dresses.

Off to the side, cigarette in hand, you peered down at the bustling city below. New York always shimmered in the summer, its lights twinkling like stars. You found solace in the hum of the streets, the distant sounds of cars and chatter. Up here, you could get lost in the lives of others—an observer in the chaos. Grateful for the privacy, you took a drag of your cigarette and exhaled. You felt like you could finally breathe again.

“Haven’t you heard? They’re bad for you.”

The hairs on the back of your neck stood to attention. Slowly, you turned to see Steven standing in the doorway, his broad shoulders casting a shadow over the small balcony. His hands were casually tucked into his pockets, but his presence was anything but casual.

“Steven, isn’t it?” you asked, exhaling smoke as you pulled another cigarette from your silver case.

“Just Steve,” he corrected with a smile, and you were immediately reminded of those billboard Arrow Collar ads in Times Square—the kind where men stood tall and proud, their smiles oozing confidence.

He walked toward you, every step deliberate, his head held high like he owned the space around him.  An Arrow Collar man indeed.

“You seem to have me at a disadvantage." he drawled. "You know my name but I don’t know yours”

You mentioned your name as you handed him a cigarette. Steve took your hand in his, and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of it. 

“Beautiful name,” he murmured, and there’s that arrow smile once again. Gently, he slid the cigarette from between your fingers and lit it with a match. The flame flickered between you, casting a brief glow on his chiseled features.

You took a drag, watching him for a moment.

“So,” you began, as you leaned against the stone balustrade, “how long have you and Peggy known each other?”

“A while,” he drawled, the low timbre of his voice slipped under your skin, causing goosebumps in its wake. “Met through work.” His blue eyes, though bright like a summer sky, carried a weight that felt far more dangerous than their color suggested. He didn’t look at the city; he looked at you.

“Same division?” You glanced away when his stare grew too much.

He paused, a faint smile playing at his lips. “Same division.” he repeated as he flicked ash from the cigarette, then turned the question on you. “And you? How do you know Peggy?”

“She used to work for my father. Now she works for my uncle. Mutual interests and all that.”

"I see," Steve said, nodding slowly. "Small world."

The silence that followed wasn’t just empty—it was loaded, buzzing with an undercurrent of something forbidden. Steve didn’t break it with meaningless small talk or faux politeness.

Instead, he just stared at you like you were the only thing that mattered, his eyes dark and intense, stripping away any façade.

As he lifted the cigarette to his lips, his tongue brushed over its edge with a deliberate slowness—a move meant to unsettle, to pull your attention and hold it there. Smoke curled upwards, but his gaze never wavered, a silent challenge sparking in his eyes: You think you know me? Here, let me show you.

Gone was any attempt to hide behind propriety. The mask of the charming fiancé slipped completely, and what was left was startling in its intensity—. Steve wanted you and he made no effort to disguise it. And in the heavy quiet, an unspoken question lingered between you both: Were you interested?

You took a steadying breath, willing yourself to maintain composure despite the relentless pull of his gaze, the softness of his lips as he pulled from his cigarette and exhaled. This was Peggy’s fiancé, after all, what was there to even say?

“It was nice meeting you,” you said finally, your voice calm and collected even though you felt it tremble “I’ll let you finish your cigarette.”

You stubbed yours out on the stone plinth beside you and turned, heading back inside. As you reached the glass doors, you caught his reflection, and you saw him crush his cigarette beneath his shoe, his gaze still following you as he watched you retreat.

As you stepped back inside, the noise and chatter of the party seemed to blur, fading under the weight of what had just happened. You felt him before you saw him—Steve, now beside Peggy, the mask of his perfect relationship slipping neatly back into place, as if nothing had happened. But you knew. And so did he.

Thanks my lovelies. I hope you've enjoyed it. Part 2 coming soon...Comments and reblogs are always appreciated.

STORY MASTERLIST / MY MASTERLIST

[qprpbj]

ik u posted ab this like a million and one years ago but ur pb&j runaway au literally haunts me. like literally stare up at my ceiling at night thinking about how fcking upset soda and darry would be haunts me. so i must know how do u think that went down 😣 like who brought up running away who actually brought it up as a Serious Thing They Could Do was it impulsive or heavily premeditated did they have a very solid plan HOW DO THE GANG REACT TO ITTTT omg this au haunts me SO BAD u have no idea 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ in my head i envisioned it as like they have a plan and a set day but then darry does smth that Really pisses pony off and he’s like “johnny 😐😐 idc we were meant to go in two weeks we’re going NOW i fcking #hate my brother” SO I NEED TO KNOW HOW U ENVISIONED IT i’m dying dead no matter what btw i love ur mind about the outsiders

stop bc i thought i elaborated more on that but when i scrolled down my account i literally made one half assed post and that IT oh that is so insane. i literally think about them on the daily though it’s not even funnyyyy so this ask made me so happy 🙇🙇 (just so you know these are basically all just messages of mine copy pasted from chats with @girlishwhimsies bc i’m too lazy to write it all out in diff words and bc the lore for this au still EATSSSS but id be SOOO happy to elaborate more on anything :D)

- i’m imagining some universe where like. the slap and everything never happens but that also means pony never really has a reason to bond with darrel so it just stays tense and weird for years and eventually he’s like. 16/17 and johnnys 18/19 and everything’s just gotten worse and both of them are so tired of their lives here. pony sees some obscure movie at the theatre and/or reads a new age book that’s set in new york about queerness in some way (idk what movie and/or book. will have to research) a la i’ve seen it in the movies and in the books i’ve read, this place is real, it’s not just in my head btw. and pony brings this to johnny and excitedly tells him this plan he has to just. up and run away to new york. he can drop out and change his name and get new ids (it was the 60s tbf) and say he’s a year or two older and he’ll get a job too with johnny. that they don’t have to just dream about being far away from tulsa, so to speak, they can just. do it. the only thing stopping them is themselves and their fears

-pony going to the library and stealing maps and checking out like 10 books about travelling and saving money and about new york and. maybe one or two he hides about queerness

-them asking dally what new york is like and dally getting all pissed but not thinking much of it. then suddenly they’re vanished with all their belongings overnight and dally knows Exactly where they’d have gone. the gang has to follow them but they never catch up

-dally shooting up in bed one night like a week later at like 3am rushing over to the brothers house all i know where they are. they asked me about. about new york the other day. oh my fucking god and darrel’s all just??? new y— NEW YORK?? what the hell did you SAY TO THEM??

-frankly i think they’d wanna go and look after them but they’re poor and darry has a job so. they just put out missing persons requests and have no choice but to call it a day. darry feels guilty but they were never that close but. but soda??? soda knowing pony ran away from him??

-i think pony would leave some cryptic message in a copy of gone with the wind (ironic) addressed to soda in the cover before he leaves but soda literally doesn’t read so he probably doesn’t find it it for ages. something about how you were the only thing keeping me alive in tulsa but i gotta go be my own person now, get away from all of this shit

-darry turns what remains of pony’s room upside down inside out looking for anything but. there’s absolutely nothing left for him

-pony sends a letter back to soda a couple months later all were safe and sound in new york and we really miss you, sodapop, every day. tell dally new york ain’t as bad as he thought…he oughta give it another shot someday. maybe you too, soda. tulsa ain’t home to people like us, soda, you’ve gotta understand why we had to leave

-he sends his first letter without a return address yet bc he’s not ready for soda to know where he is but the next one!!!

-by then it’s been like six months and pony’s hair is bleach blond (smiles) and he looks healthy for maybe the first time really ever. pony sheepishly coming out from behind his friend in some goofy totally-not-pony outfit (bc he’s fallen in loveeee with fashion. btw.) and soda hugs him so fucking tight he swears he stops breathing for a minute

-you know…darry’s been real choked up since you left. you know he…he gets it, right? he’s like you. n’he’s real torn up you left when he couldn’t, honey.

-maybe you…could bring him here, too. there’s family here for him if..he wants it. he’s just gotta get brave like i did.

[corrodedcorpses]

Boys on Film. Part 4.5

(Steve and Eddie’s POV)

Pairing: PS!Steve x PS!Eddie x Virgin!reader

Summary: It's been a year since Eddie and Steve have seen you. As they navigate their new relationship they can't help but feel something is missing. The last place they expected to see you again for the first time was at a club while you were out with your new boyfriend. The night does not go how they imagined it at all.

Warnings: Smut (18+ MDNI), public sex (ish), fingering, angst, cheating (sorry)

Word count: 5.5K

a/n: I was supposed to post this weeks ago but decided a little break was needed instead. Hope you all enjoy!

Taglist is closed but if you want an update on when I post the next chapter you can follow my fic account @corrodedcorpsesfics and turn on notifications🖤

“Cmon Eddie,” Steve all but whines, bottom lip jutting out ever so slightly and big golden eyes pleading. 

God why does he have to be so cute, Eddie curses. 

“Sweetheart,” Eddie tries to reply sternly, but it comes out just as whiny, “why can’t we just stay in?” 

“Because we always stay in,” Steve replies with a sigh, punctuating his point by flopping down next to Eddie on the couch in their shared apartment. 

Eddie turns to him then, arm outstretched across the back of the lounge, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of Steve's neck. He leans down, placing gentle kisses along Steve’s shoulder, making his way towards Steve’s neck. 

“But we always. Have. So. Much. Fun,” Eddie accentuates each word with a kiss, “when we stay in.” A smirk playing on his lips as he starts to nibble on the place where Steve’s shoulder and throat meet. 

Steve rolls his eyes but can’t help leaning into Eddie’s touch. He tries to argue further, but makes no move to stop Eddie as he continues to kiss his neck. 

“We do,” Steve agrees, “but we would also have fun if we went out. Please Eds, you promised you'd take me to that new club.” 

Eddie raises his head, looking at Steve’s pleading face. 

“A club?” Eddie repeats, disapprovingly. Steve is right though… he did promise him that, weeks ago actually. 

“Yes, a club,” Steve mocks, “it’ll be fun, we can have some drinks, dance a bit-”

“I don’t dance.” 

Steve rolls his eyes at the interruption. “I could dance a bit while you stand there and look pretty for me,” he flirts. 

Eddie looks at him deadpan, but Steve notices the blush on his face. 

“Make everyone else in the club jealous,” he continues, slinking closer to Eddie before whispering in his ear, “then when we come home I’ll let you do that thing that you did to me in that scene last week.”

 “You let me do that to you anyway,” Eddie responds, shivering at Steve’s whispering despite his protests and Steve knows he has him right where he wants him. 

“Fine,” Eddie finally sighs, though he can’t help smiling when he sees Steve’s face absolutely beaming at him. 

Steve leans in to press a short but sweet kiss to Eddie’s lips. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, before getting up and making his way to their room, “You won’t regret it babe, it’s gonna be fun, promise.” The last words coming out as a yell as he makes his way further down the hallway. 

Eddie sighs fondly with fake annoyance as he sees Steve hurry excitedly down the hall to get ready. Eddie hates going out to clubs, hates the music, hates the type of people that usually go to places like that. He does, however, love seeing Steve happy. 

He also secretly loves all of the lingering stares at his boyfriend and especially the death stares he gets from everyone when they realise that he is somehow with Steve and not them. 

He gets up from the couch, making his way to the fridge to get a beer, deciding he might as well start drinking now, whatever will help make the night more enjoyable. 

The glass clinks along the shelf of the fridge as he grabs the chilled bottle, fumbling for his lighter in his pocket before using it to pop the bottle cap off. 

As he takes the first swig of the golden liquid his eyes drift to the closing fridge. Breath hitching as his eyes make contact with that photo again. 

He’s honestly not even sure why they keep that photo there, but there’s no way either of them could ever take it off. Some days he can forget that it’s even there, subconsciously ignore it. But other days, like today apparently, his eyes decided to lock on it. 

It’s a cute photo. One of him, Steve and you. Cheeks squished uncomfortably close and sickly sweet smiles on every face. 

His eyes bore into yours, the usual sick feelings of anger, sadness, longing and regret bubbling up inside. Did he make the right choice? Should he have just kept his mouth shut and continued with your little arrangement? He knew Steve at least had feelings for him so he wouldn’t have been totally left out. Should he have given you time? Should he have run back inside with Steve and proclaimed their love for you on their knees? Would you have forgiven them? Would you have wanted them too? 

Steve comes out of the bedroom holding two shirts, intending to ask Eddie’s opinion on which one he should wear. He’s stopped in his tracks, however, when he sees Eddie’s tense body. 

He can see his hunched shoulders, the tendons in his forearm flexing as he holds onto the bottle in his hand too tightly, his features twisted as he stares straight ahead. He can almost hear the voice inside Eddie’s head screaming at him. 

Steve doesn’t need to get any closer to know what Eddie’s looking at. He seems to be finding Eddie in this same spot more and more lately. Not that he can judge, he’s pretty sure Eddie finds him like this just as much. 

He gently places the shirts over the edge of the couch, moving slowly into the kitchen before wrapping his arms around Eddie, his chest pressing up against the other boy's back. 

He brings his hands up to rub Eddie’s chest soothingly, hooking his chin over his shoulder and placing gentle kisses on his neck and jaw. 

He holds Eddie like that for a little while, knowing Eddie will speak up when he’s ready to, if at all. Sometimes they do this for a while and then one of them will turn around with a distraction, both of them pretending it didn’t happen at all. On other occasions one of them will fall apart in the other's arms or together, holding each other until the tears subside and the pain gets bearable again. Other times, they’ll talk about it. They’ll talk about you or a funny memory from what feels like another life now. 

“I just miss her,” Eddie finally whispers, “so fucking much man.” 

Steve smiles sympathetically. “I know sweetheart,” he whispers back, “I do too.” 

They both continue staring at your photo longingly. 

“Do you think she misses us?” Eddie asks tentatively after a pause. 

“I hope so,” is all Steve can say back. 

They’ve had this same conversation a thousand times, on both sides. The replies never change. They’re both scared they never will. 

Eddie turns away from your picture finally, spinning in Steve’s arms to embrace him properly. Burying his face in his freckled neck and breathing in his comforting scent. His hands roam Steve’s naked back, the skin on skin contact soothing.  

“Do you think we made the right decision?” He mumbles into Steve. 

Steve sighs heavily. 

“I don’t know, but we made it and at least I get to have you,” Steve tries to reassure. It makes Eddie smile, but doesn’t help the hurt. 

Eddie doesn’t want to bring the mood down, doesn’t want to ruin this night for Steve. So he takes a deep breath, collecting himself before pulling away from Steve. 

“So is this what you’re wearing to the club?” He teases. Steve chuckles at him as the mood flips. 

“Don’t get me wrong sweetheart, I love it, but I don’t think I’ll be able to fight off every person in the club. 

Steve just rolls his eyes, playfully telling Eddie to shut up before showing him his shirt options. 

*****

Steve feels the electric atmosphere of the club, the excitement of the crowd hyping him up, eagerness practically seeping off of him. 

Eddie notices immediately and puts away any uneasiness he has about being dragged here, plastering a smile on his face, for Steve’s sake. 

Steve can tell Eddie is out of his comfort zone, but is determined for him to actually have fun so he takes his hand, pulling him towards the bar. 

They order their drinks, Eddie downing his much too quickly before asking for another while Steve just shakes his head at him. They stay at the bar for a little while, Steve letting Eddie get more comfortable and hopefully buzzed enough to actually start having a good time. 

Steve feels his own buzz coming on as they both empty their drinks, giggling as he looks at the expression on Eddie’s face. 

“You really are hating this, huh?” He asks. 

“What? Me?” Eddie feigns hurt overdramatically, “of course not sweetheart, I’m having the time of my life with my favourite guy.” 

Steve smiles at him fondly, too cloudy to this of a good enough comeback, and way too giddy from the compliment. Steve decides he’s had enough of standing by the bar. He beckons the other boy to follow him, excitedly leading them both onto the dance floor when Eddie doesn’t protest. 

Eddie tries to not get annoyed as people bump into him and scream around him. He presses up close to Steve as soon as the other stops, finally deep enough into the crowd. 

Steve turns to Eddie laughing again at the look on his face. 

“Come on man,” he playfully shoves, “it’s not that bad.” 

“Oh yes it is,” he replies as he puts his hands on Steve’s hips. Both of them swaying to the music, it’s not exactly what Steve would call dancing, but it’ll do for now. “There’s just so many people bumping me and screaming and spilling shit.” 

“How is that any different to all those shows you force me to go to?” Steve teases. 

“It just is,” Eddie grumbled, “also ‘force’ you to go to?” 

“Mmmhmm, ‘force’” Steve nods, starting to actually dance in front of Eddie. 

Eddie watches in awe, he’s such a dork but oh my god he is so hot. Eddie tries his best to “dance” along with him, feeling more like a baby deer trying to walk for the first time. 

They continue to dance for a little while, Eddie slowly feeling more comfortable as the alcohol starts to tingle through him. Eddie is still keenly away that he obviously isn’t the only one who thinks Steve looks delicious right now. But he watches in disgust as he sees another guy eyeing him up before coming over to them. 

Steve feels somebody else’s hand touch his lower back, glancing at Eddie he can see the metalhead’s eyes darken protectively. 

“Hey, you’re really hot,” Steve can smell the alcohol on the other man's breath as he slurs in his ear. 

Steve turns slightly to him, giving him a small but polite smile as he mumbles out thanks before turning back to Eddie as he tries to move away from the other guy’s hand. 

The drunken man follows, however, pressing up against Steve as he asks, what Steve is assuming, to dance. It’s hard to make out anything he’s saying as his words get lost in an intoxicated mumble, hot on Steve’s ear. 

“Look man,” Steve lightly pushes him off, trying to get some distance between them, “I’m not really interested, okay?” 

The drunk still doesn’t take a hint. Pressing his front up close to Steve, placing his hands on Steve’s hips but before he can get even a whisper out Eddie is forcefully pushing the other guy off by his shoulder, holding him upright as he stumbles from the impact. 

“Maybe you didn’t hear him, he said fuck off,” Eddie seethes. The other guy looks at Eddie in disgust. Steve can see the way they’re both eyeing each other. 

“Ed’s,” Steve warns with a hand on his chest, trying to de-escalate the interaction, “it’s fine, come on let’s go get another drink.” 

Before Eddie can protest or get them kicked out of a club they just got to, Steve takes his hand. Leading them back through the sea of people to the bar. 

Steve can feel Eddie’s hand gripping his. The squeeze is bordering on painful, but Steve doesn’t dare untangle their fingers. 

Steve orders them another drink each as Eddie stands seething behind him, alcohol making Eddie feel even more possessive than usual, maybe blowing the situation out of proportion. He presses his chest right up against Steve’s back, as if he’s trying to shield him from every other person in the club. 

“You know you don’t have to “defend my honour” right?” Steve tries to joke with Eddie after he thanks the bartender for their drinks. 

He turns around to face Eddie finally, laughter halting the second he sees the dark look on Eddie’s face. He’s seen that face before and he loves it. 

“I do,” he seethes, bringing his hand up to cup Steve’s face, tender in spite of his words, “but I need everyone to know that you’re mine.” He brings his lips to Steve’s in a searing kiss. 

Eddie is quick to deepen the kiss, tongue roughly invading Steve’s mouth almost instantly. The taste of cheap alcohol being passed between them.

Steve gets drunk on Eddie. The way he’s cradling Steve so delicately while invading his mouth so desperately making his head swim even more than the liquor. They continue to invade each other's space, Steve's hands clinging to Eddie’s hips. 

They break the kiss reluctantly when they both need to come up for air. 

“God I love when you're jealous,” Steve breathes. 

Eddie takes a sip of the dark liquid in his cup, hand still against Steve’s face before he starts to nip at Steve's jaw. 

“Oh I know you do sweetheart,” Eddie drawls before capturing Steve's lips again, the kiss is slower this time, but equally as passionate, as they relax into each other. Eddie’s hands roaming down to rest in Steve’s back jeans pockets as he leans his back against the bar. 

They can feel the bulge in each other’s jeans as they press incredibly closer to each other, slowly grinding against each other. 

Steve starts to sway slightly as he gets bumped by a passing patron, causing Eddie to open his eyes as he holds Steve up, the kiss only breaking slightly before Steve leans back into Eddie. 

But before Eddie can get lost in the kiss again, out of the corner of his eye, something catches his attention across the bar. It feels like eternity as his brain catches up to what his eyes are seeing, but he’d be able to tell that face anywhere, the one that’s haunted his dreams for a year.

You.

Eddie feels as if the bar has gone silent. The whole building might as well be empty besides the two of you. He feels sick with all of the emotions swirling around him. He feels relief at finally seeing you, knowing you’re somewhat okay. But can’t stop feeling as if his heart is being ripped from his chest, the hurt and sadness and regret from all of those nights crying over you coming back to him all at once. 

He watches as your attention is on the bartender in front of you, arms leant against the sticky bar, accentuating your cleavage. He curses himself for looking but god do you look good. 

Before he can stare at you longer he notices the other person next to you, his stomach twisting uncomfortably as he sees his hand on your lower back. He knows he has no right to be jealous but the site of another man touching you sends him reeling. 

Without meaning to, Eddie nips Steve’s lip that’s still moving against his own before pulling back, eyes never leaving you.  

Steve can’t help the whimper that leaves his lips, his brain taking a couple of seconds to register the look on Eddie’s face. He looks like he's seen a ghost.

Dazed, Steve follows Eddie’s line of sight when he sees it. 

You. 

Steve has a similar experience to Eddie. His head swimming from all of the ugly and heavy emotions hitting him all at once. He’s thankful that Eddie’s body is still pressed against his, somewhat grounding him. 

“Holy shit,” Steve mutters, much happier than Eddie expected. Steve obviously hasn’t seen the guy standing next to you. 

Steve’s eyes can’t help but roam your body, much like Eddie’s had. You look different but good. Steve’s eyes take in the black fabric hugging your body, the way it accentuates your curves, the way your hair shines and your eyes sparkle. He watches you in awe… until his eyes land on your back. Or actually, what's on your back. 

Steve feels his heart plummet as he realises you’re here with someone else. His eyes stare daggers into the boy’s hand that’s resting too comfortably on the small of your back. He feels like he's about to be sick with all of the emotions rushing through him. He has no right to feel so angry but as he looks at the boy cozying up to you he has to stop himself from rushing over there, pulling you away from the other man and never letting you go again.  

“What the fuck,” he mutters. Finally he must've seen it, Eddie thinks. 

They watch in silence as the bartender pours two shots in front of you and the other guy who is still touching you. They’re mildly surprised when you take one of the shots, not usually one to drink anything that doesn’t taste like it’s basically just juice. 

As you bring the small glass to your lips you look up. Steve feels the breath hitch in his throat as your eye’s meet his for the first time in over a year. Before your eyes quickly flash to Eddie, who has a similar reaction, before your face contorts in disgust at the strong liquid sliding down your throat. 

They’re enraged as they see you take his hand. Dragging him away quickly. Hurt crushes their chests as they realise how quickly you want to get away from them. 

Steve’s eyes follow you as you leave, sadness and anger clearly showing in his darkened pupils. 

“Who the hell is that,” Eddie seethes in Steve’s ear, pulling him closer, “we can’t let her go this time man, we gotta follow her,” Steve watches as you briefly turn to look back, a ray of hope cracking through the gloom before you turn to leave once again. 

“I can’t- we can’t lose her, again,” Eddie pleads. 

Steve turns to face him, he can see his own pain and anger mirrored in Eddie’s face. He nods definitively at him, they can’t let you go again. He pulls him back through the crowd, stopping when they see you again. They leave some room in between you and them, not wanting to overcrowd you and to give them time to come up with a plan. 

As to not stand out too much Steve starts to mindlessly dance to the music while Eddie sways in front of him. Eddie watches as you continue to dance with him but catches you looking around. He prays you're looking for them, but doesnt get his hopes up. When your eyes start to scan closer to where they're standing Eddie lurches forward, starting to press gentle kisses to Steve’s neck, trying to make it look like he wasn't just staring at you. 

Eddie chances a glance up, seeing that you’re watching them. He whispers to Steve, letting him know that they have your attention. They both make eye contact with you, a million emotions taking hold of them, but mostly they are hurt and angry as they watch you dance and have fun with someone else. Someone who isn't them. Someone who could’ve easily been them if they just hadn’t been such idiots. 

Blood boils in their veins and, admittedly, their cocks as they watch you turn back to the other man, kissing and grinding against him as he holds you close. They hate how much your little show is turning them on. 

They’re both completely taken aback when you wink at them. 

“She fucking knows what she’s doing to us,” Eddie practically growls in Steve’s ear. 

“Fucking brat,” Steve scoffs. 

They watch on in lustful irritation as you continue your little show for them. They watch your hips sway and grind, your hands roam your dates body as they try to not look at his hands roaming yours. They continue to dance with each other, both absentmindedly grinding into the other as they feel themselves grow painfully hard against each other. 

The alcohol, the atmosphere, that damn dress you're wearing is messing with them. Their thoughts are completely muddled, they don’t know what to think or how to feel. The only thing they can think clearly is how much they would kill to rip that dress off you and show everyone in the club who you belong to. 

They feel as if they’re on the verge of stalking over there when they see your date lean down to whisper in your ear. Eddie has to stop himself from scoffing as he thinks of all the stupid, cheesy shit he could be spurting. All the sappy shit you and him used to make fun of.

Confusion washes over them both as they see the other man leave suddenly. They see you nod at him, and the forced smile you give him before his retreat, but they can tell you’re uncomfortable. 

They watch as you continue to dance by yourself, although you look much more tense now that you’re alone. They mentally add this to the ever growing list of things they don’t like about this guy. 

Even tense, the way you dance has them mesmerised. They almost forget about their plan to talk to you as they become completely bewitched by you. 

Eddie can’t take it anymore, you’re so close to him and finally alone, he has to talk to you. 

“This is our chance,” Eddie whispers urgently and a little too loudly in Steve’s ear. Throwing all caution and reason to the wind he quickly starts weaving his way through the crowd. 

“Wha- hey, Ed's wait-,” shouldn’t we think about this and what we’re gonna say first? Steve was about to say, but Eddie had left too quickly. Steve curses as he starts to move after Eddie, holding back a bit as he watches the metalhead go up to you, wanting to gauge your reaction. 

Eddie sees you turning around, face searching for someone. He’s surprised to find you’re looking right where they used to be standing. Maybe you were watching them as much as they were watching you?, he thinks, still hopeful you’ll actually want to talk to him. 

He falters slightly as he finally reaches you, suddenly aware that he’s not sure what he’s even going to say to you, where does he even start? He’d also be lying if he said your outfit wasn’t making him feel a little bit intimidated…

Suddenly he sees you start to leave. He rushes forward, grabbing onto your waist lightly and pulling you into him. His eyes involuntarily roll back as he feels you brush against him. 

“Hey there, little one,” he purrs into your ear, your old nickname easily rolling off his tongue, making him aware of how much he’s missed saying it.

His mind is reeling at having you this close to him. The sliver of coherent thoughts he had left have officially been pushed out of his mind by thoughts of you. How you look, how you feel, hell even how you smell. 

“We liked that little show you put on for us, sweetheart,” he continues. Not exactly what he wanted to say but he knew he had to say something and that was the first thing he could think of through the fog of desire that’s set in heavy around his head. 

His hands feel as though they have a mind of their own as he starts to massage your hips. He has to suppress a groan at the way they feel pressed beneath your thin dress. His hips involuntarily press closer to you and Eddie could get down on his knees and pray when he feels you press back against him too. 

He starts to sway to the music as he had with Steve, to make it so neither of you stand out and also as an excuse to get some sort of friction against his throbbing dick that’s pressed perfectly against the plush of your ass. 

Getting swept away in you he starts to press light kisses to your neck, keeping it light, knowing he shouldn’t push his luck. He’s pleasantly surprised when you let out a breathy moan and sink back against him further, your head lolling ever so slightly to the side to give him more access to your throat. 

Steve watches on at your interaction. At first rolling his eyes at Eddie, thinking for sure he was about to get slapped by you. But now he watches on with lust and honestly a bit of jealousy. He knows you and Eddie are going to regret this later but he can’t keep his eyes away, his hands twitching and dick hardening as he tries to fight his own reason, the alcohol, and you and Eddie, making it extremely hard to. 

Nerves pierce Eddie's heart as he feels you start to pull away slightly and at the look you’re giving him as you finally turn to face him. He can see the conflicted emotions on your face, you seem almost guilty at how much you’re enjoying this. He watches you as he waits for you to say something, but instead you just search his own eyes. He has to suppress a smirk as he watches your lips part and thighs clench at the lust you obviously find swimming in his dark pupils. 

Steve has officially lost all sense of reason when he sees you suddenly turn around in Eddie’s arms, he can’t see the look on your face but he can read your body language. He decides to join you and Eddie, coming up behind you just in time for you to step back against him. 

He shudders as he feels you pressed against him again, becoming instantly intoxicated by you. He bends to your height, lips accidentally brushing your ear as he whispers “don't be like that, honey.” 

He mentally celebrates when you relax, pushing back into him and letting Eddie step close to you again. Steve can’t help but let his hands roam you, electricity forming under his fingertips as he traces your waist and thighs, like his hands can’t believe they're actually feeling you again. His hard on presses rougher than he’d meant to against you, his possessive side truly taking the reins. 

“Can you feel what your little show did to us baby?” Steve continues in your ear, desperate for you to say something, “you’re so fucking naughtly getting us all worked up like that.” 

They continue to tease you, pressing against you, their hands continuing to roam wherever they can reach, revelling in the little breathy sounds you're making. But they share a look when you still haven’t responded to either of them.  

“Anything to say for yourself, miss?” Eddie tries, growing desperate to hear you say anything, even if it’s telling them to stop, just any indication you’re liking (or not liking) this. 

They chuckle in relief as they hear you moan in response, much louder than the noises you had been making, but still, it’s not enough, they need to hear your voice again.

They’re growing painfully desperate as they continue to touch your body. Steve’s hands end up all over your thighs as Eddie’s come to rest perfectly against your waist. Where they belong, they both think. 

Steve decides to try his luck as his fingers slowly glide further and further towards the front of your thighs, hips bucking against you as you let out a fucking whimper at the action. He starts to kiss up your throat again, causing Eddie to smirk at him when your eyes flutter closed. 

“That feel nice, pretty girl?” Steve tries, surely you have to reply to this, and just in case he adds, “want me to keep going?” 

Eddie anxiously watches your face, looking for any sign of discomfort. He relaxes when he sees you nod slowly, but still it’s not your beautiful voice. 

“Ah, ah,” he tuts, “you know the rules princess, use your words.” 

Eddie and Steve feel as though they’ve ascended to heaven when they hear you finally whimper out a small and shaky “please”. Your voice sounds like music to their ears, the fucked out tone making their dicks throb. 

Eddie nods at Steve, just in case he’d missed your tiny plea, desperate to see you come apart for them. Steve groans as his fingers finally make contact with your already dripping cunt, he has to fight against his need to finger you and to continue touching you, and the aching of his dick pressed too tightly against his pants.

He dips his fingers into your underwear, growing impatient as he continues to moan in your ear, not even trying to stop them anymore. 

“Fuck you’re dripping,” he can’t help but tease, “this all for us huh?”

They revel in the way you nod your head enthusiastically and can only whimper in response. Beneath all of the lust and cloudy thoughts they realise that this must mean you still want them at least a little bit… right?

Eddie almost cums in his jeans at the sound you make when Steve’s fingers finally dip into your soaking cunt. He feels your knees start to buckle as Steve finds a steady pace immediately. Eddie hopes you won't hate him later for the bruises his fingers are sure to leave with how much he’s gripping your waist, trying his best to keep you all upright and somewhat inconspicuous. 

Eddie presses further into you to have some leverage while holding you up. He doesn’t, however, anticipate that this position would make the back of Steve's palm drag against his clothed bulge as he continues to finger you. Eddie clenches his jaw as he feels himself growing embarrassingly close just from the back of Steve's hand rubbing him. 

Steve feels completely overwhelmed in the best way possible, feeling you clenching around his fingers as you grow closer, Eddie’s cock bumping against the other side of his hand as he rocks into him too, his cock so hard Steve swears he can feel it throb, even through his jeans. He can’t help but try and chase some release too, hips repeatedly grinding into your ass.

They both have to hold back lewd groans as they hear your moans become higher, a telltale sign you’re just as close and as worked up as they are. 

They groan as they hear you stutter out an almost incomprehensible “I’m, I’m-” before you're gushing around Steve’s fingers, face buried into the crook of Eddie’s neck as you finally come apart for them. 

The way you’re clinging to him shouldn’t warm Eddie’s heart as much as it does, the current situation nowhere near ‘heartwarming’, but he cherishes it anyway. 

They’re fighting every urge in their body to not push you to the sticky floor and have their way with you as they hear your moans fall from your beautiful lips, god they've missed your sounds so much. 

As you start coming down from your high they start rubbing you soothingly, Steve focusing on your thighs and Eddie’s hand in your hair, holding you against him gently as he tells you how beautiful you look and how well you did for them. 

They never want this moment to end, the peace they both finally feel having you in their arms again is incomparable to anything they’ve ever felt. It’s the one thing that’s felt wrong their entire relationship. The absence of you. 

Their perfect scenario comes crashing down all too fast as you suddenly stiffen in their arms. Lifting your head from Eddie’s shoulder you tentatively meet his eyes. 

He feels like he’s going to be sick as he instantly sees the overwhelmed look in them. He whispers your name carefully, pleadingly, knowing you’re about to run away again, knowing he can’t lose you, not again. He’s about to start pleading with you but before he can say anything you snap at him, telling him to let you go. 

You push back against Eddie’s chest, prying your way out from in between them, and they let you, not wanting to physically force you to stay. They yell after you as they start to follow you, but you ignore them, rushing away as fast as your heels will let you. 

Steve’s turns around to look at Eddie. He wears a face that looks as broken as Steve feels. 

“We fucked up.”

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Tagging some mutuals: @andvys @wroteclassicaly @littledemondani @ilovecupcakesandtea @eddiemunsons-missingnipple @bimbobaggins69 @eddiemunsonspantschain @eddiemunsonfuxks @ghost-proofbaby @usedtobecooler @prettyboyeddiemunson @translatemunson @roanniom @dearest-readers @solarluvs @starcourtcass @justmeinadaze @pxrxcxa @parkermunson @divinelyruled @your-nightmaredoll @munsonsbaby

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[pranabefall]

ノㅤA FOREIGNER'S GOD // zhongli x reader.

syn. bingyin finds himself with a broken child and a fuller house post performance ( and you...you are a little lost ).

CONTENT WARNINGS. ( 2.14k ) implied parental death, landslides, one traumatized child, brief mentions of grief, reader's nation of origin is left ambiguous ( though my indulgent ass does lowkey hc the sumeru gang ), grumpy old men. the chapter is relatively tame. no zhongli yet hehe. the art within the chapter, save for the banner, belongs to me. PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS WITHIN THE CHAPTER LIST.

ENTRIES. reposting this piece from my old account!!! wish me luck!!! this work has been marked mature. readers below the age of 18 / ageless blogs, do not interact. any individual who is not a legal adult or has an age indicator on their page will be blocked without further notice. artwork used in this chapter belongs to me!!!

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PROLOGUE : his garment is covered in dust.

"open thine eyes and see thy god is not before thee! he is there where the tiller is tilling the hard ground and where the path-maker is breaking stones. he is with them in sun and in shower, and his garment is covered with dust. put off thy holy mantle and even like him come down on the dusty soil!"

― GITANJALI 11 , RABINDRANATH TAGORE.

There is a story the young ones love — of the heavens, a god and a chariot of gold filigree. 

It was told to him in passing once, when he asked about a streak across a painting ( the rice paper had blotted at the edges with ink. The grass had bled into the fallows ). The painter was an old man. Too old, perhaps, to be holding a brush and hobbling to the stepped terraces of Qingce. But Bingyin could appreciate that flavor of stubbornness that steadied those trembling fingers. The man talked about his children first, then his wife, then the fallen sun and the yawning chasm. He listened in turn, because stories were meant to be heard and now he tells it to his audience.

Today, there is another to follow the usual. The sun chariot was a mainstay. The children like skyward carriage crashes for some reason ( is it inherent violence? A sadistic pleasure in divine accidents? He is worried ) and they liked dragons more. So this one has a dragon. 

A dragon encrusted with cor lapis and a mountain cave that cloistered its coiling wreathe. 

It was an undulating, glimmering thing. The skin puppet he carved out and painted was long, segmented and his hands ached navigating the way it flies and flies and flies ( dragons fly a lot. Far too much for his tastes. Damn dragons ). 

But Bingyin could see the clapping through the thin screen, hear the laughter. He keeps singing. He sings about the flooded plains and the guided people and the mountain erected at the harbour’s head. Then he sings about how the dragon retreated into Jueyun Karst once more, curling under the cavernous tunnels like jade pressed to the earth.

His voice is hoarse when he stops and the cheers ring out. The puppets were tucked away. He stretches out his arms and feels the throbbing press on before it fades. It was another day of work for him. Tomorrow, he’d be working the tea slopes then returning home with a new story to tell and it would grasp and grind at his mind till he writes it down and forgets it’s existence. Perhaps he’d make a few new puppets, perhaps not.

This time though, when he gathers the last of his spoils, he sees Haoran lingering by the wooden seats, and you, still too young to properly let your feet touch the ground below. Bingyin had seen that look on your face, and he’d seen the mud caking your shoes and hem. They shouldn’t belong to a child. Not those eyes. Not those distant, dead eyes. 

“Is there something you want?” he tries to pack faster despite this. His drum rolls to his feet. Bingyin tries to right it up again, half flailing like a winded octopus. 

“Yes.” Haoran nods with a solemn set to his mouth. Why does he look like that? Bingyin thinks with a frantic shriek echoing at the back of his mind. He peers into his mora bag, at the glint of metal peering back up, then at you wearily. Why am I being stared at? Stop. Stop staring. “Could we have a moment of your time please?”

“No. I’m busy now. You should have been quicker.”

“Please.” 

Oh hell to it.

Bingyin puts on a show of tempered frustration and glares at Haoran with his lips pressed to a harsh line. He needs to crane his neck up a bit. That foolish boy was a head taller than him with a gangly set of arms to match. You are attached at one end like a leech struggling to keep up. “Alright. Don’t waste my time.” 

“Okay.” words stumble over themselves. “Do you recall the rains a few days prior? They were particularly heavy weren’t they?” 

“Yes.” he wasn't stupid. He could see rain just fine. 

“Well…” Haoran casts a glance at you. There is pity there. It’s cloying and it’s unpleasantly thick. You seem to disappear within the shadow cast upon you, small, so small and so fish eyed. “There was a landslide at Juehyun Karst and a few travelers were caught within it. This little one lost their parents.”

Haoran’s voice drops to a whisper. He talks about it like it’s forbidden. A taboo. A cover up. He doesn’t mean it. Bingyin can’t quite judge a fool’s pragmatics and Haoran was well intentioned in keeping you separate from something dour. But Haoran’s pragmatics were meant to be judged at this point because he was, in fact, terrible at it.

“They can still hear you,” Bingyin points out. He is right. You can. You are trembling. His story was about the Karst too, wasn’t it? He wonders if you heard it and he hopes to the wayward gods that you did not. “Why are you telling me this?”

“They meant to come to Chenyu Vale. They meant to come here…them and their parents. They were tea farmers…” Archons. “Yes, yes I'm getting to it. Their parents knew your wife.”

Bingyin stills. 

“My wife?” he repeats.

“Your wife…oh don't look at me like that Mr. Bingyin.” Haoran helplessly looks between the two of you. Bingying shuffles in place, discomfort edging his stance. He feels flayed open. 

“And…?”

Haoran blinks. “I…well…that’s all I suppose. We were hoping…they’re still a child, you see…”

He knows what he’s asking for. He knows why he’s asking it. Bingyin seizes up and his throat runs dry. He thinks of the mora tucked away in his cupboard and the supplies it would buy for the week. Just enough for two. Not three. 

“No. Absolutely not.” he decides then and there. 

“But.” Haoran begins a protest. Bingyin cuts him off. 

“We have no time for children,” he states.

“You could ask your wife first — ”

“And she’ll say the same thing.” His words are sharp, metallic, cold. They shudder against the impact like a weak knife. “We have no time for children. Find someone else. A relative. Where are they from?” He doesn’t bother listening to what comes next. The conversation is dead at this point. Still the footsteps behind him persist between Bingyin navigating the stone walled houses. There was white at his periphery and the mountain green of Haotan’s hanfu and the flashes of your clothes after. A perpetual annoyance

Stubborn little —

“You wouldn’t abandon a child!”

“I don’t even know them!” 

“They have no one else!”

“You seem eager to find them a home. You have a perfectly decent one!”

Haoran throws his hands up. They are drawing gazes at this point; the beady eyed, nosey sorts. People will be talking after this in the rumor mill. “Someone needs to go to the harbor to sell your tea. I cannot ferry the youngling with me on my travels!” 

“You’re just a coward! I’m old and frail and near death! I can't keep up with a child!” he spares a glance your way. “No offense kid. Strangers and their dangers, I suppose.” You almost look pensive as you nod. Maybe you being ‘perceived as a threat’ was taken as a vague flattery. Bingyin can’t quite tell. He swears under his breath. There is a bitter aftertaste. He despises it, how his movements slow and let Haoran and you clumsily keep up.

( He’s worked his craft and walked these beaten paths for years. Bingyin still can’t quite call himself jaded. Not yet. )

“Their mother was one of her students.” Haoran continues. “We managed to salvage a few belongings and there was a photo…” He fumbles, unfolding a faded bit of paper. Bingyin recognized the younger face of his wife sidled up next to a smiling girl ( she was dead now. He looks at you again. You don’t look at the photo. You do not want to ). He gives pause, lets that bat around his mind.

( He remembers the letters. He remembers Nayao talking about a visitor. His stomach lurches. It’s unpleasant. )

Finally, he speaks. “You can stay for tea. We will see what we can do.” 

Haoran’s shoulders sag. “Oh.” and there is relief there, clear relief like witnessing the rainclouds shadow scorched lands. “Oh thank you.”

Bingyin only shuts his eyes and utters a sound of defeat.

The walk home took longer than it should have. Your shoes kept getting stuck in the mud and your small hands were caked with it till the lines of your wrists. Bingyin tries not to mind. Children stumble and fall and he watches you straighten yourself up with a near robotic stiffness and pace after him. He half wonders if you died in that landslide too. He half wonders if you were just a ghost. 

Nayao, perhaps, was the softness you might have needed, between Haoran’s awkward comfort and his own brittle countenance. She lets you clean up by the basin and warm up by the stove and let the pleasant heat of tea brew spot your skin. By the time Haoran had left, she was already reaching for the mat and spare sheets.

“So he wasn’t lying then?” he asks. 

“No.” she replies. He rests his hand on her shoulders. There is a weight to her voice. She seems ready to cry and she almost does, between her furtive wiping. “I did know her…”

“I suppose we’ll be caring for them, then.” Bingyin reasons. Because there was a cruel world behind these walls and no other face to have you. Nayao had made up her mind. Bingyin knows he can’t protest. She had the same stubbornness that painter did. 

He visits your little space with a blanket. You were curled up and a little shaken and swept, and still quiet. 

“Thank you.” you mumble. It’s the first words you tell him. Bingyin jerks his head. 

“Don’t. It’s the least we could do.”

Your hold on that single photo tightens. You’re shaking, shaking, shaking and Bingyin knows that you want to cry. Not now though. Not in front of him. “You’ll be living with us. At least until another relative comes to take you…if there are any.”

“I can do things.” you continue, half rambling. It’s almost obsessive. “I can work…my father was in a tea farm too…Mr. Haoran told you right so of course you do, and I helped him a lot. We grew lots of things and…and…”

Bingyin considers you. His lips press. “I think that’s child labour.” he admits. “No, it actually is. And it’s quite illegal. Do you really want to do that?”

You fold into yourself, hands clasped and trembling. You look raw, scraped hollow. “I don’t want to stay.”

“I know.”

“You’re really mean.” you sniffle, wipe at your eyes and squeeze them shut. “And you lie.”

Bingyin tilts his head. “Did I lie?” he intones. He didn’t speak to you much before this. There was no room to lie.

“You lied about the dragon.” you repeat. “You lied about the dragon in that show. There’s no dragon there….otherwise…” you trail off. The tears start prickling through. Your shoulders hunch and your nose prickles, fighting back against it. You sound sad, raw, lost. “Are they really gone?”

“Seems so, yes.” he tries to be as kind as he can. However there is so much he could be kind about with a question like that. Dead means dead and sugarcoating it meant rubbing salt over an unwanted wound. He is brittle, a little rough, yes, but he is not soulless. “And that was just a story. It’s not real. I’m sorry if it made you sad.”

“There is no dragon then?” you seem heartbroken, saying that. .

“No.” He shakes his head. “No, there isn’t a dragon. Just a few vishaps, yes but they spend their days letting the sun burn their backs.”

“If there was….would he have saved my parents?”

Bingyin looks you in the eyes. “Maybe. They said he was a god. Can’t be sure if gods exist, but I think he would have.” They don’t exist though. There were a few who did believe, perhaps. Once upon a time, he did too and those stories were a greedy mouthful after mouthful of assurance. But if Liyue did once hold gods within its mountain scathed scape, Bingyin assumes they were long gone.

You lay down against your mat. Bingyin lets you be, lets Nayao soothe you with some cut fruit and a few kinder words. You take them quietly, delicately picking at the sunsettia flesh and the sweet juice till a half empty plate was politely pushed away and you face the wall. 

When they both leave you be, they hear a faint sob ring out. Nayao leans her head against his shoulder.

They linger by the door and let you cry. 

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