#FAMILY???? THE SMILE????

[mapofthesoul20]

I just think The Astronaut is neat :)

[bonerot19]

I know we like writing fics where Jason is all "I'm not the kid you lost" and "he died and I'm all the worst parts of him that came back" and whatever. but lately I've been thinking about a Jason that's angry bc everyone thinks he came back wrong, because to him, he's the same as he's always been. sure, he's more upset and angry and traumatized, but he's still Jason.

I've been thinking about a Jason that spent most of the time since his death underground and then catatonic. to him, hardly any time has passed at all. to his family, three years have gone by. and Jason knows he looks different than he did, and he knows he's sharper around the edges, now, but he's still Jason. he's the same kid that died and now he's back and why doesn't anyone see that?

they're the ones that changed, not him

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[littlelightfish]

Them <3

[downydig]

Moomintroll could see Snufkin's footprints had done a long jump and suddenly crossed over themselves. "He must have been very happy," decided Moomintroll. "He did a somersault here—that's clear enough."

[happi-dreams]

Silly comic goo weee !!!

[mingyusbinch]

REST IN PEACE, DEAR MOONBIN (1998-2023)

[zestychipps]

Gravity falls brain rot is taking me over 🐺

[notyourmusebby]

charles and his in laws in monza, interesting

everybody knows they are married and expecting

[umbrellacam]

oh no, now I'm imagining Dick opening jars for 14-yo Tim during Prodigal

Tim doesn't even think to ask him at first; his dad wasn't at home often enough for it be a habit, and like hell was he gonna ask the older boys at boarding school to open stuff for him like he couldn't do it himself :/ and while staying at Wayne Manor, well, with Alfred around the jars were without fail already open by the time they reached the table.

so when it's just the two of them, fending for themselves both on Gotham's streets as Batman and Robin and in the Manor's kitchen as Dick and Tim, it doesn't occur to Tim to ask.

Dick watches him wrestle with the jam jar like it's Killer Croc for a long minute, chin propped in one hand and eyebrow raised in amusement. Then he just reaches over and plucks it out of Tim's grasp with a casual, "Here, kiddo. Let me."

now, Dick could tap the jar against the edge of the counter, all around the stubborn lid. or he could run it under warm water. or gently twist his warm hands round and round the metal rim to heat and loosen it that way. teach Tim all the standard tricks of the jar-opening trade.

but for some reason, he doesn't.

instead, under Tim's startled, expectant gaze, Dick finds himself taking firm hold with the vise grip of his trapeze artist hands, flashing the kid a showy grin, and just twisting with a hard flex of muscle.

the loud pop isn't half as satisfying as the beam of admiration on Tim's face.

Dick should feel silly. jeez, it's not like he suplexed a Rogue right in front of the kid or caught him out of a 10-storey fall or anything.

(who's more ridiculous - Tim for being impressed by so little, or Dick for feeling so undeniably smug about it?)

(is his life seriously such a mess that wowing the baby Robin with feats of basic domestic competence counts as a win? seriously? get a grip, Grayson.)

"yeah, yeah - I loosened it up for you!" Tim laughs, but when Dick hands him the jar with one hand and scrubs vigorously through his hair with the other, he can still see his little brother's pleased smile as he attempts to duck away.

so Dick keeps doing it. Tim always insists on having a go at it himself, first, but shoving stubborn jars at Dick with that expectant look quickly becomes automatic.

it's a Thing. like many Things about Tim, it could easily be annoying, but somehow it manages to be endearing instead.

maybe that's just how little brothers work.

Dick does teach the kid how to do laundry and fold clothes and replace broken windows and cook basic meals for himself because he's not about to do all the work in this big old empty house, but he never does teach him how to open stuck jars.

[barawrah]

i want us both to eat well

[turtleblogatlast]

I think a lot about Leo standing up for his brothers in the things that really matter to them.

Like- Leo is the one who immediately pushes Mikey and Donnie into finding Raph the second it’s clear that their oldest brother is missing because he knows Raph can’t handle being separated like that.

Leo is the one who stands up for Mikey when Mikey wants to go on a solo mission, actively vouching for him and being the one to convince Raph into letting Mikey go, because being independent and proving himself just as capable of standing on his own two feet as everyone else means so much to Mikey.

And Leo defends Donnie’s honor in particular when his brothers’ intelligence is insulted because Leo is well aware of how important Donnie’s smarts are to him - and how important having those smarts valued and acknowledged is as well.

All this goes right into just how well Leo knows his brothers. For as much as he’ll tease or fight with them, he knows them, and he loves them.

[rottmntrulesall]

These aren’t tears

I swear

[puppetmaster13u]

Those who encountered the first Robin quickly learned that it was never just it there.

If Ur interested in the series: HERE IS LINK TO AO3

[fortist166]

Happy wedding!

[aerequets]

a redraw of one of my fav panels for today's ep :]