#EDIT: I AM VERY GUILTY OF THIS ALL THE TIME | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

2cool4ghoul · 2 months ago

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I'm on Fire

Long time no see, eh?

sorry for my prolonged period of absence, I got shit going on!!!!

This is my first time writing for Joel Miller, I hope everyone enjoys, maybe it could be a two parter if people r feeling it! I haven't edited this because honestly who has time for that?

Summary: Reader asks for help with being taught hunting, gets stuck with Joel, who she thinks hates her, but we all know how that ends? Reader grew up in a cult situation where girls r taught they need to repopulate the earth after the outbreak and thinks sex is just for baby making, Joel wants to show her it could be more. I been listening to I'm on fire by bruce Springsteen and that song inspired this.

Warning: under 18 DNI! age gap not specified but allusion to it being gargantuan and ludicrously capacious, Smut, unprotected p in v (do I need to say it? WRAP IT), fingering, oral f receiving, slight daddy kink, doing it from behind, Joel is kinda mean, perv Joel, allusions to masturbation, innocence kink, religious imagery?, mentions of pregnancy, kinda public I guess, post outbreak, can be game Joel or Pedro Joel, any Joels a goal, no use of y/n, reader is female gendered, pussy pronouns, size kink if you squint, Praise kink, yearning, Joel feeling guilty and sorry for himself , boohoo, if I miss anything please tell me!!!! I love feedback!!

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You had been walking for hours.What was meant to be a simple hunt had now turned into aimlessly walking through the forest, staring at Joels back as he stalked in front of you. He refused to admit that he had gotten the two of you lost in the midst of chasing a rabbit, or a deer, or whatever it was he says he saw. When you did suggest heading a different direction, you were met with a sharp rejection, or a grunt telling you to keep your mouth shut. You knew he was angry before you’d even left, saddled with the burden of dragging you along with him.

You didn’t particularly know Joel and you didn’t particularly like him either. His stand-offish demeanour and deep glare whenever you were around made you feel small in his presence. You had given up on the smiling and politeness that you gave everyone else in an attempt at self preservation, yet deep down you so badly wanted him to like you. You weren’t sure what you did and at what point you did it, but Joel made it very evident that he’d much rather be torn to shreds by infected, than teach you the basics of hunting. Which, with the sun becoming low and darkness threatening to spill over into the sky, you thought maybe he didn’t know the basics of hunting either.

Frustrated, you huffed whilst adjusting your backpack on your shoulders, rolling your eyes slightly as he stopped to try and grasp any familiarities in your surroundings. “What’s got you all huffy and puffy?” He quipped, not even bothering to look over his shoulder at you.

“I am tired, Joel, we’ve been walking for hours now, I want to go home.” Sighing, your head fell back on your shoulders and he carried on walking.

“If I remember correctly, this was your bright idea, was it not?” His fists clenched at his side and you furrowed your brows.

“It was, when I thought I’d actually be able to learn something, I thought you were meant to be good at this-“

“I am good at this, you’re scaring ‘em all away, with your bitchin’ and moanin’” You’d obviously bruised his ego a bit there, yet the reaction you’d gotten was the most exciting thing that had happened all day.

Well, that and being able to watch him closely whilst he furrowed his brow, focusing down the barrel of a gun. Laying on the ground next to him, so close that you could nearly smell the musk that seemed to radiate off of him. Yes, you didn’t particularly like him, but looking at him? You liked that very much. You liked the way his arms looked when he rolled up the sleeves of his flannels. The way he looked when he started the day, fresh out the shower with his greying hair slicked back and slightly damp. The way his voice was low when he was trying to teach you a lesson. The way he crossed his arms and rolled his eyes when you made a joke, a suggestion, or even just breathed. Seeing all of this things was enough to put a pit in your stomach, a pit that you’d been carrying around all day with little idea what to do about it. It ached and it throbbed.

“Well maybe in your old age, your losing your touch.” You said it quiet, thinking that he wouldn’t hear you. But he did. He responded with a scoff, clenching his fists again. He wasn’t even going to dignify it with a insult back, his reaction alone was enough to make you feel insufficient. You both retreated to the silence and you kept yourself to your thoughts on how you were going to deal with the ache between your thighs.

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Night had fallen and Joel had still not managed to find your way home. Instead you’d found an old shack, barely together but good enough shelter to sleep for the night. Joel figured it was tomorrow’s problem, that and he couldn’t be bothered to listen to your complaints about how tired you were.

The dim glow of the campfire lamp created a yellow cast over Joels features and you couldn’t help but stare as he sat opposite you, eating a sandwich you’d given him earlier in an attempt to lift his spirits. His features were rough and frown lines had been permanently etched into his skin. This life had worn him down, toughed him up like leather. Maybe that was why he was mean to you. Maybe he’d ran clean out of kindness. His large hands made whatever he was holding look small, they were calloused and scarred across his knuckles. You didn’t want to imagine what things those hands had done. But you did want to imagine what they could do. Running over your skin, fingertips grazing your lips, leaving goosebumps and a shiver down your spine. Grabbing at your skin, creating bruises and marks, his fingers, thick and strong, spreading you open and filling you-

“The fuck are you lookin’ at?” Gruff and fed up, Joels voice snapped you right out of the darkest corners of your mind, your eyes widening slightly as you realised you had obviously been staring, eyes hazed over.

“I, uh, I was looking at my sandwich, I don’t think you deserve it.” Nice save, you praised your self internally and he raised an eyebrow, looking at you like you were some stupid insignificant thing.

“How come I don’t deserve it?”

“We caught nothing today, you didn’t teach me shit.” You tried your best to mimic the facial expression he was pulling, hoping that just maybe you could make him feel how he did.

“Hmm.” He grumbled after putting the last bite in his mouth. “’s'all gone now.” There was almost a smirk playing on his lips, his gaze making you squirm and squeeze your thighs together. What was happening to you? It felt like every fibre of your being was betraying you, begging for you to climb over to him and beg him to take you whatever way he wanted. “What’s the deal with you anyway?”

“With me?” Taken aback, you went slightly rigid, why would he want to know anything about you? He hated you, he made it perfectly clear. He nodded, eyes narrowing as if he was trying to work you out. “What do you mean?”

“Well, why do you want to learn to hunt? And don’t you have some boyfriend around to teach you?” This was the most he’d spoken to you all day, and he had you spluttering on the sip of whatever you’d just taken.

“I want to hunt so I can be useful,” you coughed out, shrugging your shoulders in an attempt to look casual, “and no I don’t have a boyfriend to teach me, so I suppose you’re just gonna have to put up with me for now.” Shaking your head, you tried at being playful, but it still didn’t crack his prying exterior.

“Pretty young thing like you, ‘bound to have ‘em falling at your feet.” It was said as almost a passing comment, but your shock was visible on your face, blinking and biting your lip trying to make up a response that was witting and defensive but you couldn’t.

Before you’d scrambled your way to Jackson, alone and bewildered, you had grown up in a cult, whose goal was primarily to restart civilisation. They’d taught how it worked, making babies and all that, and for a while you were happy playing the part, letting your father chose a man, who would be forced with the task of putting as many babies as he could inside you. You endured, what felt like a chore, with your partner, watching your friends fall pregnant. Your inability to fall pregnant was what made you run in the first place, hearing of what they did to the girls who could birth a child had frightened you, fearful that you’d be reduced to another mouth to feed. A drain on resources. So with all of that in mind, finding a boyfriend was never something that crossed your mind, nor was it something you greatly desired. But with Joel sat in front of you, legs spread with his thick thighs in your direction, you felt strings inside you being pulled that had previously been untouched.

“You think I’m pretty?” You swallowed, maintaining eye contact with him for a moment, trying to catch a hint of softness.

“I think you’d be doin’ better tryin’ to find a nice young man,” He adjusted his position and met your gaze, “rather than spendin’ the night in and old shack with’an old man like me.” This was him trying to be nice you thought, but it was having the opposite effect. It made you defensive and you narrowed your eyes.

“Oh because I’d be better off finding a man-”

“You’re puttin’ words in my mouth.” His interruption was calm, yet stern, shaking his head at you and rubbing his face with his hands. He’d succeeded in silencing you as you looked down at the ground in front of you, slightly embarrassed.

“I’ve had a boyfriend, or a lover, I don’t know what to call him,” You avoided him, you had no idea why you felt the need to be vulnerable, “and I don’t know what the whole big deal is, y’know?” You sighed, cheeks flushing a bit pink. “I don’t understand why someone would put themselves through that.”

“Through what?” He leaned forward slightly, curiosity shadowing his face in the dim light. Finally you lifted your head, showing him your red cheeks.

“That.” You hoped he understood your insinuation. And due to the sudden rigidness of his body recognised that he understood. He pursed his lips for a moment and then opened them as if to speak, yet nothing came out. Embarrassment was flooding your body, you regretted even bringing it up due to the sudden tension in the air. And there was that pit in your stomach again, aching and throbbing as you watched him stumble over words to say.

“Because it feels good.” Was all he could stifle out, watching your reaction carefully as your knitted your brows, screwing your face up in confusion slightly.

“Maybe for the men,” You scooted up onto your knees, looking up at him as he sat taller than you, “but for me, as a woman, its just so much pressure.” He was now looking confused, squinting his eyes, trying to understand.

“Pressure to what?”

“To make a baby.” He was beginning to patronise you, making you explain the obvious like it was some sick game. It got you all defensive again. “It doesn’t feel that great when all you can think about is if you’re going to be able to make-“

“It’s not just about that.” Adamantly he shook his head, eye scanning over your body watching as frustration overtook you. “It’s not just about making a baby.”

“Don’t treat me like I’m stupid, Miller, I’ve had sex, I know what its about.” You bit sharp, heart thumping in your chest, moving closer to him to try and assert some dominance.

“I don’t think you do.” You could’ve sworn there was a ghost of a smirk hiding behind his beard. “Christ, I should not be the one telling you this.”

“Telling me what? What Joel?” You were now practically between his legs, kneeling, begging to understand what he could possibly be talking about. “Please, tell me, I don’t understand.” His eye were trying frantically, to look everywhere except for you.

“Darlin’, I cant be tellin’ you this, s’wrong.” His voice was lower, speaking to you quietly and firmly, grabbing a hold of your wrists. You felt hot under his touch, his rough hand wrapping around your wrists, staring into your eyes. “M’old enough to be your daddy.”

“Whats that got to do with it?” Your voice lowered to the same volume as his, you were searching for the answers in his eyes, and he looked conflicted. Like he was balancing options.

Your body was betraying you again, it wanted to reach forward, wrap itself around him, be as close to him as possible, as if the proximity now was not enough. As if the feeling of his fingers and palms on your now hot skin, was not enough.

“You think I haven’t noticed the way you’re always starin’ at me? Hmm, sweet girl?” God, if you were red before, now you were purple. Your skin was prickling, not just at the acknowledgment of your behaviour but at his sudden use of pet names. You couldn’t force words out even if you tried. “Why’d’you think I avoid you like you’re the plague?” With his face inches from yours, it was now easy to see that there was almost desperation in his eyes, like he was losing a battle, unable to let go of his grip still.

“B…Because, you, you hate me.” You finally stuttered out, your throat dry from the heaving breathing.

“Christ, no, I don’t hate you, darlin’, I just can’t stop myself when you’re in front of me, staring at me with those big o’eyes, looking like you’re just about ready to drop to your knees.” There was still no answer to your question, you still didn’t understand, you so desperately wanted to understand. Especially after watching the way he licked his lips, his burning stare taking in every inch of you, “And to think, you’ve been sat there, squeezin’ your legs together, and you don’t even know what you’re doing.”

“I, I, I don’t understand, what you’re saying, Joel.” Your chest was rising and falling, a sweat blanketing the both of you, his grip loosening but letting his hands travel further up your arms until they were at your back.

“Let me show you.” Was all he could muster out until his lips were on yours. He crashed against you, pulling you into him by your back. You fought for a moment at first, out of shock at his abruptness, but it did not take you long to be pressing your body against his, your fingers getting lost in his hair, gripping and tugging whilst he groaned into your mouth. His tongue found its way against yours, tasting every part of you, savouring the moment as you whimpered. You pulled away for a moment to catch your breath and he rested his forehead against your, “We shouldn’t be doing this.” The ache was taking over your body now, like it was all for him, making you force your lips on him again.

“Please, Joel, please,” You purred into him, his hand reaching down to your ass, gripping it hard, “please, I’m aching.”

“Baby, you don’t know what you’re doin’ to me,” he growled, his free hand reaching up to your neck, “you don’t know what you’re asking for.”

“Please show me, I need you.” Begging, you ignored how right he was, you were sure what you needed but you needed it fast. The tension was becoming unbearable, you needed release.

He held you close by the small of your back, gently lowering you down until your back touched the ground and he was on top of you. Looking up at him through your lashes, you were ready to do anything he asked of you, your entire body feeling like it was electric. He continued kissing you, moving his lips down your jaw, down your neck, sucking and unbuttoning your shirt with an experienced hand. There was still a little bit of disbelief inside you, a failure to believe that Joel Miller, who 2 minutes prior you believed hated you, was on top of you undressing you. The anticipation for his next move was unlike anything you’d experienced before. “God, I’ve thought about this,” His voice vibrated across your chest, your body lifting to meet his lips, your bra exposing your cleavage, “now look at you, angel, whimperin’ for me like a bitch in heat.” He was grinding his hips, pressing his hard bulge into where you needed him most.

“Please, it hurts, Joel.” There was nothing you needed more than what he was giving you, the friction of denim rubbing together was nothing cooling the burning sensation between your legs.

“I know, baby, I know.” He grumbled, “m’gonna show you, jus’ takin’ my time.”

Kisses were descending south down your body, soft red marks left in their wake. He was taking his time, occasionally glancing up at your wide, blown out eyes. He wanted to show you exactly what he’d meant. Exactly what he’d meant. When he finally reached the waistline of your jeans, he tapped your thighs, signalling for you to lifts your hips so he could begin to pull them down your legs and then off your body entirely, taking your white cotton panties with them. You instinctively pressed your knees together, immediately feeling exposed in front of Joels large frame.

He tutted, “Ain’t no use bein’ shy now, sweet girl, you gotta show me where you need me.”

You did as you were told, spreading your legs, whilst he knelt back, palming the growing tent in his jeans. “that’s it, good girl.” groaning, he leant forward, lowering his body to meet yours, “Look at how wet she’s got f’me, you might not know what I mean, but she definitely does.” A sadistic chuckle left his throat, watching you squirm under his intense gaze.

Your body jolted when one of his fingers gently slid up your folds, collecting the wetness and slick, leaving you unable to breathe. No one had ever touched you there, not even yourself, and here was Joel Miller, slack jawed, toying with your hole however he pleased. He did slow motions up and down, watching as you glistened in the dim light. You had no idea you were capable kf feeling this feeling, a tingling sensation rippling in waves along with his touch. You were absentmindedly grinding your dripping cunt in motion with him, your eyes flickering shut whilst your head rolled back. “that’s right, baby girl, feels good don’t it?” Joel cooed through a smirk, watching intently as you rubbed against him.

“mmhmm,” You hummed in a daze, this must’ve been what he was talking about, “so good.” And with your admission of pleasure, a small smile dancing over your lips, he took his hand away. Your head snapped up and you propped yourself on your elbows, looking down at him with pouted wet lips. He took little notice of your reaction, instead he wrapped his arm around your thighs positioning his face opposite your throbbing pussy.

Before you had time to question why he was so close, he showed you. He dove into like a you were water and he was in a drought. Gasping, you watched with your jaw wide, panting whilst he licked and sucked at you, his tongue exploring every inch of you. “Joel, fuck, my god, what are you doing?” you panted, your chest rising and falling heavily.

“Well,” he spoke between breaths, “I’m tasting you, darlin’ and boy, don’t you taste sweet.” he continued on, watching your breathing growing erratic, the torment his tongue was bestowing on you causing your eyes to roll back into your head, a hand holding onto his forearm. “your old boyfriend never came down for a taste?”

“No” Just when you thought you couldn’t feel any better, he brought you to a new high. One which made you sure that this was what he was talking about surely it didn’t get better than this. Feeling his beard scratching against your thighs, seeing the absolute sheer pleasure in his eyes as his tongue fucked itself into your hole.

“He was missing’ out, I’ll tell you that much, sweetheart.” It was a smug scoff. He was immensely enjoying the effect he was having on you. See you wriggle, unable to keep still, holding your hips firmly down to the ground so he could have his way with the sweet pussy in his mouth. Knowing that his mouth was the only one to taste you, to savour and relish in the taste of you, god he felt like one lucky man.

The pit that started in your stomach had now grown and blossomed to take over your entire body, it was consuming and controlling you. Your back arched off the ground, only remaining anchored by Joel firm hands, you let one of your hands grab fistfuls of Joel’s hair, pushing him closer against you, whilst your other hand took to your breast, pinching at your hardened nipple underneath the restrictions of the bra. You cared not for the noises you made, filling the otherwise silent forest with salacious moans and Joel’s name. If a search party had been sent out for you, they’d definitely find you. They’d find you laying half naked, fucking yourself on Joel tongue. It was nearly shameful how much you were at his expense. The grip was gone from one of your thighs, your weak leg dropping to the ground giving him a wide access as you planted your foot on his back. He leant back for a moment before pursing his lips and spitting directly onto your already drooling cunt, making you flinch.

“look at me, pretty girl.” He took a breath, your eyes meeting his, “god, what a sight for sore eyes, so pretty, look at me.” babbling his took your moment of distraction as a invite to insert two of his thick fingers into your hole, smiling again with wet lips, the juices from your pussy dampening his beard and shinning off of his prominent nose. Your eyelids fluttered as you struggled to make eye contact with him, your lip between your teeth to hard you were sure it was going to draw blood. at first he made sure to slowly let you adjust to the stretch of his fingers, feeling your walls constrict around his digits. “mmm, thatta girl, taking my fingers so well, is that nice?” His praise made you fumble, unable to form sentences, only being able to respond with a over ambitious nod of your head, pouting with beads of sweat dribbling down your temples. “I bet it’s nice, no one’s ever touched you like this, huh? My needy girl, following me around, so full of desire with no where to go.” You continued nodding, hypnotised by his words, his fingers curling to reach a spot, overwhelming you, tears prickling in your eyes. Your stomach was tight, the pressure building and building, your knees growing weak. “My girl.” He repeated to himself, looking your up down as if he was admiring his handiwork.

“M’all yours.” It left your throat involuntarily, strangled and choked, pathetic.

“All mine?” He huffed incredulously, “Yes you are, all mine, christ girl.” His mouth returned to the mess he had made made, lips wrapping around and pulling at your clip, releasing with a wet pop. You hissed and tugged at his hair, his nose smushed against your skin, sniffing and smelling as much of your natural scent as he could. He couldn’t remember the last time he ate a pussy this intoxicating, or if he ever even had.

Something was about to rupture in you, it panicked you, washing over your body. You were unable to breathe, unable to release the grip you had on him, your eyes widening as you trembled against joel’s mouth. “Joel.” you squeaked out and he looked up at you with dark eyes, “what’s, fuck, I’m…” Your heart pounded in your chest and in your ears, you could barely focus, unable to form a sentence, or even get a word out.

“that’s right, go on, let it out,” his warm breath fanned against your sensitive area, “make a mess, let go f’me, soak my finger.” He was rattling you and egging you on, seeing your pathetic, writhing, sweating body in front of him.

Once more, you did as you were told. And holy shit.

It was like your entire body was on vibrate, toes curling, unable to even make noise. Stars were bursting behind your squeezed shut eyes, body lifted forward off the ground. “That’s my girl, there she is, fucking hell, give it to me, darlin’” He groaned, digging his hips into the ground, watching you come undone. The tension was being released in constricting waves, your walls clenching and squeezing around his fingers, which remained still, but still putting pressure on the spot they had previous being stroking relentlessly.

“oh my god, Joel, fuck me, oh my god, fuck, fuck.” When you could finally breathe again, you whined his name, cursing and crying a stream of profanities, his fingers leaving you empty whilst his tongue lapped up every precious drop of your high. It took a couple blinks for your vision to come back at when it did, you were met by the proud grin plastered on his face.

“what was it you said earlier? somethin’ ‘bout me losin’ m’touch in m’old age?” He teased, before putting the fingers that had been in you, into his mouth. He sucked them dry, letting his eyes roll back into his head for a second. “Sure didn’t seem to mind my touch when you were choking my fingers.”

“what was that?” You almost lost your voice, your throat dry. Joel was working his way up your body, kissing you and nibbling at your salty skin.

“That, my darlin’, was what I meant.” His teeth pulled at your earlobe and you took deep breaths before letting your fingers nimbly start to unbutton his own flannel.

“Do it again.” You pleaded, staring into his brown eyes, trying to rid him of his shirt as quickly as possible.

“Christ, you are needy,” He stopped his kisses, “she’s already wanting more? it feel that good?”

“Please, do it again, I want more.” You were completely possessed by the pleasure you had felt, gagging to feel more, you wanted him carnally, to have as much of him as possible.

“Use your words, what do you want?” He was enjoying this too much for someone who had previously stated how wrong it was. He was going to give in, there was no way he couldn’t with his cock so painfully hard in his pants, he just wanted to relish in having you beg for him some more.

The truth is that he’d spent plenty of time watching you. When you first came to town and Maria set you in the cabin next door, Joel had watched you. In fact, his bedroom window had been so perfectly placed so that at the right time of night, when you stepped out the shower he could make out your outline behind your curtains. In these moments, Joel would let himself indulge in all the dirty, perverted thoughts he’d kept locked up. He take his manhood in his hand and pleasure himself at the thought of feeling your skin against his, the thought of you whimpering and offering yourself, spread apart, for him. He’d thought many times about bounding through the door, ruining whatever was left of your innocence. He hadn’t, however, imagined that you had this much innocence left. And he would’ve never imagined in his wildest dreams that you’d be begging him for more, for him ruin you.

“I want you, I want you to fill me up, to stretch me.” You were speaking whatever came to mind, no thinking, just action, tumbling over your words with the grace of a bull in a china shop. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, your eyes fucked out, hair matted and wild. This was enough for him to give in, allowing you to push his shirt down his arms, revealing his tanned skin and soft belly. Hair scattered below his waistline and you were eager to find where it lead to.

“You’re gonna be the death of me, girl.” He cursed, watching your small hands struggled with his belt buckle. When he’d agreed to help teach you hunting, this is the last place he thought he’d be.

He ended up undoing his belt himself, your frantic hands proving useless, but this meant you got to watch with wide, hungry eyes as his cock slapped his lower stomach, red and swollen with pre-cum beading at the tip. You were speechless, gulping, unsure of whether it would even fit. After he’d discarded of his jeans, reaching round and pumping his shaft in his fist. You were starving for him, the way he looked in this light, completely bare in front of you. He came down to your height, lips against yours, tongue in your mouth. “Can you taste yourself? Taste how sweet you are?” You purred a yes into the kiss and he pulled away, grabbing your chin between his thumb and finger. “taste good don’t you?” His half-lidded eyes remained fixed on the way you licked your lips and smiled sweetly at him, as if you were completely angelic. “yeah, you like it? ‘Course you do, jesus.” He shook, he wasn’t gonna last long with you looking the way you did, feeling the way you did. “how do you want it?” He was buying himself time, his cock already twitching just at the thought of being inside you.

“I’ve never done it, from behind.” Your voice was quiet and unsure, you’d clearly never been asked how you wanted it and now you felt like there was a right and wrong answer. However with the way Joel immediately grabbed you, flipping you over with a squeeze so that you laid on your stomach, you realised that maybe you picked right.

“Now,” he straddled your thighs, grabbing and kneading at your bare ass, spreading your cheeks and planting his cock between them, “it’s been a while,” he rocked his hips gently, watching the way his cock pushed through your plush cheeks, getting lost, “I ain’t tryin’ to make excuses-”

“Please, please, I’m begging you,” you pleaded, arching your back and pushing against him, his balls dragging against your pussy causing him to shiver, all the hairs on his body standing on end, “I want you to give it to me again, Joel, it’s aching again, I’m aching for you.” You tried your best to crane your neck, so that you could make eye contact with him and he took it as an opportunity to grab you by the neck.

“M’gonna give it to you, baby girl, you ready?” His lips brushed against your forehead before resting there, so you whimpered in response before he plunged into you.

He stretched you out in a way that burned. It felt like you were being torn and you evidently winced and hissed and the intrusion of his cock. He, on the other hand, had just entered into heaven. The way you wrapped around him so tight and perfectly had him choking on his low groans, basking in watching your pussy so delightfully swallow every inch he had to give you before stopping at the base. You needed a moment, clenching your fists and squeezed your eyes shut, you needed to adjust to having something of his sheer size inside you. He needed a moment because he was sure if he made any sudden movements, he was going to spill inside you immediately, before he had even had a chance to get you remotely close to your climax. “god, you’re so fucking tight, she’s takin’ me real good.” He kissed at your forehead again, trying to distract himself from the way you were squirming. You knot in your stomach was growing again and the pain was soon numbed out, awaiting his movement.

“you’re so big.” whining, you fluttered your lashes, splaying your hands out in front of you, preparing yourself.

“I know, baby, you ready for it?”

“Yes,” You were practically gasping for air, making puppy dog eyes at him through your eyelashes, watching him twitch, “please, Joel, please.”

Against his better judgement, Joel began thrusting his hips slowly into you, watching your expression twist, eyes squeezed shut, mouth wide open. You mewled and whimpered, knuckles turning white as you gripped at nothing. You looked pathetic beneath him, surrendering yourself entirely. And he ate it all up. He was enthralled, blinking down at you, watching tears form at the corners of your eyes, your freckles hiding beneath a red flush. This was heaven.

He rocked into you fervently, pushing in and pulling out moans. His grip around your neck kept your face in constant view, his breath fanning over your skin. “You look so beautiful, baby, taking this cock.” He grunted out between the snap of his hips, reaching deeper inside you than anyone had before, your soft velvet walls wrapping around him, clenching and contracting to accommodate his girth. Your lips couldn’t form words, stuck open wide, panting, your tongue resting on your bottom lip.

You felt so full, feeling him in your belly, grazing your cervix with ease. His free hand traveled from your hips, holding you safe and firm, to squeeze a handful of your ass, painfully hard. It caused you to yelp, pushing your hips into him, making his thrust halt for a moment as he shuddered. He was trying desperately hard to not cum embarrassingly fast. He felt like a teenager again, trying to divert his thoughts to anything other than the writhing body he was currently impaling with his throbbing cock. But the way you were pushing back on him, begging him constantly with that drunken look in your eyes, like he was the only other person on the planet. He couldn’t ignore it, no matter how much he though about what needed fixing at home, all his thoughts returned to you.

“More.” You choked out. And he raised an eyebrow.

“More? More what, sweetheart?” He punctuated by giving a hard thrust that left you shaking.

“Harder, I want it- Oh fuck!” Interrupting you, he took advantage and began ramming into you mid sentence, taking immense pleasure in watching you become undone around his relentless torment.

He let go of your ass and your neck, picking you up by your hips so you were on your knees, check pressed against the ground. There was an excited smile on your face, cheeks aching and hot. “You smilin’ girl? Yeah? You like it like this, feel good don’t it?” Whilst you couldn’t see his face, you could hear he was groaning through a grin too, keeping your legs steady so he could quicken his already brutal pace.

There it was again, that growing pit, the flush of electricity that erupted into your body. Your grin only grew, whining and spreading your legs out further for him, allowing him to go deeper and deeper with each groundbreaking thrust. Your legs were trembling, your knees aching and surely bruised up. But it was the last thing on your mind, all you could think about was the impending surge of pleasure. “Hell, look at you,” Joel growled, swallowing hard, “You fuckin’ love it.”

“I… Do, don’t stop!” You spread your legs further, thighs falling downwards, ignoring the burning sensation at the slightly uncomfortable position that you knew you’d regret tomorrow.

“Oh darlin, I ain’t gonna be able t’hold on much longer, not wit’you spreading your fuckin’ legs like this f’me.” Joel was holding on for dear life, becoming desperate. He knew you were close, he could feel it in the way your cunt was becoming tighter and tighter, dripping with arousal, slick running down his thighs getting lost in the hair.

“Mmmhmm, I want it daddy, fill me up.” Your words were slurred and he tensed at what you’d called him.

“Yeah, baby girl, you want daddy deep in you?” He leant over you, palm pressing against the side of your head, pushing you further against the wooden floorboards. His thumb fell just above your mouth, sitting on your lips until you wrapped them around it, sucking gently. You nodded, your body beginning to tense and tremble.

This was shameful stuff, Joel thought, stuff people go to confession and repent for. Here you were, on your hands and knees, offering yourself up, sucking his thumb, fluttering your lashes. You were either the most beautiful angel or a demon sent to lead him astray. Either way, he was relishing in it.

“Come on baby, I know it’s-”

“Oh, Daddy, I'm gonna- it’s coming, I’m-” Your frantic moans came out tumbling over his, interrupting him, arching your back up, your entire body clenching at you were engulfed in pleasure again. “Oh, Joel, Oh my god, you, f, f, feel, so good!” You didn’t care about your volume, you just cared about how amazing it felt to have Joels cock deep inside you as you twitched and writhed around him. You pushed your ass against him, trying to get him as far in you as possible.

Joel couldn’t stop himself, spilling into you will a prolonged broken groan, one hand grabbing a fistful of your hair, the other grasping on your hip, his head snapped back. He could’ve been having a heart attack, the way his heart was pounding in his ears. You could feel him pumping inside of you, each twitch and rope painting your insides.

“Oh, sweet girl, Christ!” He panted out of breath, riding out his high, jutting his hips forward into you as you breathed heavily beneath him, sensitive to every one of his movements. “You’re gon’ be the death of me, girl.” He fell over you, his weight pinning you down, pulling his softening cock out of you.

He rolled to the side of you, you remained laying on your front, thighs trembling, aching too much to move positions. “You still in there?” He raised his eyebrows, brushing hair behind your ear as you look up at him in adoration, big eyes filled with want. A giggle left your lips as his chest rose and fell in deep loud breaths. “What’re you laughin’ at?”

“Is it like that every time?” Coarse, your voice creeped out, wiggling closer to him as he rubbed the bridge of his nose with his calloused hand.

“No,” sighing, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling your tired frame into his, immediately soaking in the warmth, “that was… somethin' else.”

You were quick to fall asleep in his arms. You knew you were safe, your body aching and weak. You were engulfed in his scent, head resting nestled into his armpit, soaking it all in.

He’d opened a can of worms, swarmed by thoughts he’d tried to suppress, watching you curl up next to him. He could not shake the image of you coming undone around him, surrendering so easily to him. It was so much better than he’d ever imagined, but now he’d acted on these thoughts, he could no longer suppress them. He couldn’t avoid you, the only act of indulgence he’d allowed himself was watching you through your window. Now he hadn’t just indulged himself, he’d submerged himself in you. He was ashamed. He should’ve known better.

______________________________________________________________

“Get up, gotta head back.”

You were awoken, your shirt being thrown at you, crumpled over your chest. Your eyes took a moment to adjust, sunlight seeping into the cabin. You blinked a few times, a shadow breaking up the sunlight. Your body ached like you’d ran a marathon. “Hey, Kid, wake up.” His stern abrupt voice, causing you to pout, instinctively bringing your shirt up to cover your breasts.

Joel was standing opposite you, fully dressed, bag on his shoulders, towering over you with a fed up expression painting his features. You blinked up at him a few times, frowning, confused. “Do I gotta say it a third time? Jesus Christ.” He muttered under his breath, shaking his head, turning his back on you to walk out the cabin.

A tsunami wave of embarrassment and shame flooded through you. Feeling your cheeks turning hot and purple, scrambling to get your bra and clothes on, eyes scanning the floor for your belongings. You pulled your socks on, searching for your panties. They’d seemingly disappeared. But due to Joels passive aggressive sighs outside, you decided they were a lost cause. Pulling your jeans up your legs without them. You felt dirty, your inner thighs still sticky and wet, his cum smeared across them. His coldness was causing you to do flips in your tummy. When you finally met him outside the cabin, he muttered something else under his breath and then began walking without a word.

You kept your eyes down to the ground, tail between your legs, walking in silence. You felt the tension in between you two. Like you’d upset him. Like you’d done something wrong. He didn’t dare look back at you, ignoring every noise you made, cursing every twig you stepped on reminding him you were there. And reminding him where he’d been. Reminding him of the touch of your soft skin, how small you felt in his arms, the way you were whimpering his name begging for him. He couldn’t bare it, knowing you were behind him, eyes distraught, the carpet swept from beneath you.

Your mind was elsewhere, trying to figure out where you’d messed up, what it was that was wrong. Everything had felt so right, so so good. What was it that you did that had angered him so much. You didn’t notice the branch within the leaves in front of you and you tripped slightly, falling forward, only to be caught by Joels strong hands. “Would you just watch what you’re doin’?” He bit, lip twitching, staring you directly in the eye, hands gripping onto your arms for a moment too long.

“Did I do something wrong?” You swallowed, watching him turn around on his heel, shaking his head again, like you were asking something outlandish, “I mean.. was I… was I not very good? I know I don’t have much experience but-” You were fumbling over your words again, insecurity threatening to spill from your eyes, Joel freezing in front of you.

“What we did was wrong, no matter how good it felt, for both of us.” He spoke stiff, refusing to look you in the eye when he turned around, refusing to acknowledge that you were holding back tears. “It was wrong.” He lifted his hands in front of him, as if to signal “enough”.

“But-”

“No, no, thats it end of.”

“You’re not even letting me-”

“Listen to me,” he stepped forward, now staring too directly in the eyes, inches from your face, steadying his breathing, “Last night should not have happened, It will not happen again and I’d appreciate you keepin’ it to yourself, it was a mistake, a lapse in judgment.”

His words stung. Like falling on your palms on gravel as a kid. Quick and lingering. You tried your best to hid your quivering bottom lip. You didn’t know how to respond, you didn’t know if he’d even let you. You decided against it. He’d humiliated you enough, you weren’t about to cry in front of him too.

You carried on the rest of the walk in silence. Like nothing had changed. Like you couldn’t still feel him dripping out of you. Like the ghost of your taste wasn’t still dancing on his tongue, on his lips. He could smell you all over him.

When you finally got back to town, you parted ways, the awkwardness radiating off of the both of you as you were welcomed back. He made you feel sick. It was all so embarrassing. The way he wouldn’t even look at you. But why would he? You were just one great big lapse in judgment. The return to your small cabin was lonely and you had barely gotten to your front door when you finally allowed yourself to cry. You allowed yourself one glance back at Joel, who was entering his own home, already staring you down. You sobbed a little, shooting him a cold glare before slamming you door shut behind you, sliding down it with your hands in your hair.

Joel felt guilt rotting inside him.

He entered his home alone, it was cold and he could still smell you all over him.

He took one hard step at a time, ascending his stairs, his bed creaking beneath his weight as he sat down, sighing.

He reached into his back pocket, pulling out the white cotton panties, the little satin ribbon on the front crumbled and slightly undone. Lifting them to his nose, he inhaled, your scent filling his nostrils and his brain. The image of you playing on repeat behind his eyelids, like an old movie on a projector.

And with one hand holding your panties to his nose and mouth, eyes fixated on your bathroom window, he let his other one fist his cock out of his jeans, stroking it slowly.

Back to square one.

#pedro pascal #joel miller #pedrohub #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #joel x reader #joel miller fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x you #last of us #the last of us

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hiveswap · 1 year ago

Text

Summary of The Cat of The Year poll atrocities of 2023/2024

I'm sure that most people on this side of tumblr have seen the Jellie vs. Nefarious Anglerfish poll going around with like 60k votes at this point, and I'd really like clear up some of what happened since I was around for the whole thing.

Url blocked out for op's privacy. They have already left but don't look for it if you haven't seen it/don't harrass them if you already have.

1. The previous round (preparation)

I discovered the poll in its previous round, needless to say she beat Jort's ass severely. This was around the 3rd of january, meaning that this round finished before jellie's passing with only about 7k votes. Op did add their own piece of propaganda from their main:

...which was FINE. (except for stuff we'll see later) Of course running a poll while biased isn't ideal but I for one didn't even know they were the op until much later. I also added my own piece in a separate thread, and they didn't interact with it at all. There was no drama.

2. The Finale

Jellie unfortunately passed away right before the starting of this poll, which was the catalyst for what happened next. Op did exactly as last time and added a slightly more mean spirited encouragement to vote for the other contestant. This is the point where I believe that i fucked up personally.

I added this thinkpiece accusing op of associating all mcyters with Dream (who we all hate for the record) despite them not alluding to him at all. This is because tumblr has a history of disimissing all mcyters as... everything that dream was been accused of. Op did allude to not caring for mcyt. but they didn't say what i accused them of. This is important to point out because this reblog of mine is still being spread. Jellie was in the lead at the time, but not by the time i woke up next morning.

I won't be including anyone else's additions because I don't want to put blame on any specific person. Just felt like clearing up mine.

3. The Fuckening

Some time later op made this post to their personal blog:

which is insanely shitty because, as other people have pointed out, the "lame ass youtube cat" didn't die to inconvinience op or ruin their fun, and people would have probably voted for her anyway because jelly is universally beloved in the mcyt community. This isn't anti democratic. This post was added to the poll with a caption saying op should not be running this poll, and it took off. Op later went on to say that this was a joke:

This apology was not taken well by people, (including me) because "you were not meant to see it" isn't an apology and they still very much made fun of someone's pet dying. Safe to say this did not make the drama stop and only added fuel to the flame. I believe this was the point where the conversation of mcyt fans being unjustly sent hate to was reignited.

We should discuss that! it's a real thing that happens often and is equal to childish bullying. However, in this case, OP was the only one getting sent hate to my knowledge. The notes were mostly saturated by mcyt fans, and even now i can only find one or two hateful stance towards us under the whole 20k notes post.

4. Conclusions

Op posted a second apology to the catoftheyear blog to try and calm people down (i believe this is comprehensive and a lot better than the previous one) The blog was deactivated shortly after, so i only have my phone screenshots of it that i also added to the poll itself at some point:

(Edit) Here's proof that op did not write the justification they got criticised for, from the notes of the original poll:

This apology didn't get seen, or get accepted by enough people, so op made this statement on their personal:

Needless to say I am deeply dissapointed (and guilty) that it's come to this. Yes, op said tasteless things that made us all angry, but telling a human being to commit suicide is worse than being insensitive about a stranger's pet dying. Even after I posted about the blog being decatived i had someone come into my notes to wish that "they never find happiness" i mean wtf. This isn't like shipping where we can do whatever without the content creator's input. this is fucking harrowing and i can't imagine how i'd feel if this was done in my/my pet's name especially after losing them as recently as a week ago.

I hope no one from hermitcraft who is on here (let alone scar holy shit) learns about this like they did with previous lighthearted tournaments. If you truly respect the creators you claim to be a fan of as people, you do not tell people to kill themselves over them. And finally, let Jellie fucking rest, guys. she had a long, good life. I hope op can come back and also avoids behaving like this if they ever wish to do so. I'm angrier at mcytblr, though.

#catoftheyear #jellie #tw animal death #tw suicide bait #hermitcraft #goodtimeswithscar #adding to main tags so people see this instead of the poll itself with no context on how it ended #If this breaches containment and gets used as a reason to hurt mcyt fans i am going zo eat whoever is doing that #catoftheyeartournament #jellie the cat

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msschemmenti · 4 months ago

Text

country living

request: there needs to be more love for jemily x reader tho!! so im thinking like jj taking her partners back to pennsylvania to show them what it’s all about

jemily x reader

summary: jj’s high school reunion is happening and she convinces both her girlfriends to come to her small rural town in pennsylvania.

a/n: hey hottie!! thanks for the request— country girls shake it for me jj edit stans rise!! idk how rural east allegheny is but im making it very small town rural 🤠 hope you enjoy <3 if anyone wants the actual reunion part of this just let me know 🫡

“good evening lovers!” y/n smiled over her shoulder at the sound of her front door opening.

“lovers? that’s new.” emily mumbled as she rounded the kitchen island to the younger woman.

“you got a problem being one of my lovers?” y/n asked teasingly as she turned the heat down on the stove.

“not at all, just curious.” emily replied holding her hands up in surrender before placing a kiss on y/n’s cheek.

“i kinda like it.” jj mused slipping out of her shoes.

“you like anything that alludes to bedroom activities.” y/n rolled her eyes at the blonde.

“guilty!” jj sing-songed, coming to pinch y/n’s side affectionately. the younger woman turned the stove off completely and turned to face her girlfriends.

“dinner will be done in a little bit if you want any. oh and before i forget, i picked up your mail, it’s in the mail holder in the entryway.”

“thanks baby.” jj smiled, stepping back in the entryway to retrieve their mail. she shuffled the envelopes, scanning the senders as she walked back into the kitchen. she plopped down on a stool and passed emily a few bills before pausing at an invitation addressed to her. she slid her finger through the sealed envelope and pulled the invite out curiously.

“god, has it really been 25 years since i graduated high school?” jj mumbled as she flipped the card over.

“25 years?” y/n echoed. “i’m not even going to say what i was going to say.”

“oh god, don’t do that thing you do when you say how old you were during that year. it always makes me feel old.” emily grumbled.

“hey! i stopped myself. i can’t help it, it’s the only way i can track time.” y/n whined as she started plating dinner. “anyways, is there a reunion or something?”

“yeah, it’s in pennsylvania next month.”

“oo, are you gonna go?”

“maybe. i haven’t been home in a pretty long time. i’m sure my mother would enjoy that.” jj mused.

“if we don’t have a case, i think you should go.” emily added.

“i second that. you gotta show everybody how hot you still are.” y/n nodded, as they all settled around her small dinner table.

“well if i go, you two have to go too. what better way to show everyone how hot i am, than to bring my super sexy lovers.” jj pointed with a cheeky wink.

“to pennsylvania?” emily grimaced.

“yes? don’t look so happy about it.” jj rolled her eyes.

“i don’t know, didn’t you grow up on a farm or something?” emily continued.

“not on the farm, near yes. you’re acting like im gonna make you milk a cow and churn your own butter.”

“didn’t reid say you were corn fed once? is that not what that means?” emily questioned.

“can i wear cowgirl boots? i don’t have any but i wanna buy some.” y/n asked turning to jj.

“obviously neither of you have ever been to pennsylvania.” jj shook her head.

“right, but cowgirl boots. yay or nay?”

“i vote yes. i think you’d look hot.” emily voted.

jj sighed with a smile and shook her head, “god, i hope we get to go to this reunion.”

luck was surprisingly on jj’s side and she and her girlfriends were pulling up to her childhood home in East Allegheny early thursday morning.

jj put the car in park and slid out first and sighed as she gazed over her childhood home. y/n hopped out of the backseat, feet covered by the red leather cowgirl boots she just bought. emily slid out last, sunglasses blocking the sun and a soft flush from the morning heat.

“welcome to east allegheny.” jj smiled turning to face both women.

“how exciting! pennsylvania.” emily teasingly cheered, causing jj to roll her eyes.

“it is giving corn fed.” y/n spoke quietly as emily leaned into her side.

“oh shut up! you two are the worst.” jj pouted.

“we’re kidding we’re kidding!” y/n protested moving to wrap her arms around jj’s neck and pull her close. “we’re so excited to learn more about country living babe.” y/n grinned before puckering her lips in a silent request.

“mmhmm, you’re definitely dressed for country living.” jj teased, meeting y/n’s lips sweetly.

“just be glad, em wouldn’t let me wear my hat. i think it looked adorable.”

“adorable yes. i agree. but i think it was a little too on the nose.maybe save that for texas or something.”

“hater.” y/n rolled her eyes before hissing as emily pinched her bum in retaliation.

“alright you two, behave. my mom’s waiting inside and i’ve got a whole day of east allegheny things i wanna show you.” jj scolded.

“yes ma’am.” emily and y/n said in unison with giggles on their tongue. emily grabbed their weekend bags and followed behind jj and y/n as they headed for the house. as soon as the first stair creaked— the door flew open and revealed sandy jareau.

“hey mom.” jj smiled softly at her mother through the screen door. their relationship had definitely been strained in the past but sandy seemed to finally be accepting her daughter for who she was and who she loved.

“morning jenny. come on in girls. i just finished breakfast.” sandy corralled leaning to kiss jj’s cheek as she pasted through the door. both y/n and emily followed suit and smiled politely at their host. jj leads the way through the hall of her childhood, breezing past the soccer pictures and family portraits on the wall. but unfortunately for her— her girlfriends were not breezing past anything.

“oh my god, is that jj?” y/n asked on an excited gasp. jj groaned and turned to see where the younger woman had stopped in the hall. she shook her head solemnly when she realized she had stopped at the top of the hallway.

“oh yeah, little jenny.” sandy smiled over the younger woman’s shoulder. “i’ve got the pictures situated chronologically as you go further up the hallway. she’d just lost her first tooth.”

“oh i just wanna pinch those cheeks!” y/n grinned pulling her phone out to snap a picture to keep.

“i’ll have to get the album out before y’all head back.” sandy smiled heading toward the kitchen.

“oh god, don’t enable her. there’s no telling what she’ll do with those pictures.” jj whined.

“no no, don’t listen to her. mrs. jareau, i need to see every baby picture of jj you have in this house.” y/n called as she stuck her tongue out at jj teasingly.

emily hid her laughter behind her hand and placed her hands on y/n’s waist to guide her toward the kitchen of the small home. jj followed behind rolling her eyes at the giddy look on all the women’s faces.

“are we taking the truck? please say we’re taking the truck.” y/n bounced at the bottom of the steps looking up at jj. they’d all cleaned their plates and thanked sandy and now jj had a day of ‘country living’ planned for her two girlfriends.

“i kinda wanna see you drive a truck as well. is there a hat you’ll wear as well?” emily joined y/n at the bottom of the stares.

“oh it’d be so hot.” y/n mused bringing her hands up to pull on jj’s arm impatiently.

jj’s eyes moved from emily’s teasing smirk and y/n’s pleading pout and couldn’t help but grin under their attention. allowing the younger woman to pull her into her side, she placed a chaste kiss on her pouting lips. “fine fine, we’ll take the truck. since it’s in such popular demand.”

y/n cheered happily and made a beeline for the old red truck parked under the tree leaving emily and jj to watch her go. emily slung her arm over jj’s shoulder with a laugh, “she’s loving this way more than i thought she would.”

“wouldn’t be surprised if she’s got a thing for cowgirls.” jj said bumping her hip against emily’s.

“oh for sure.” emily agreed with a laugh. they watched as y/n climbed into the bed of the truck and turned to face them.

“can i ride in the back? i wanna feel the country wind in my hair.”

“no.” both emily and jj vetoed in unison.

“aww you guys are no fun.” y/n pouted but knew they weren’t changing their minds.

“emily!” jj called with her hands held out in warning.

“what?!” emily paused in her step.

“your foot is hovering over a huge pile of shit. and i know how many you’re going to be if you step in that.” jj pointed.

“oh yeah that’d be so gross. we’d make you ride in the bed of the truck.” y/n nodded turning to look at the poop in question. “oh my god— what kinda animal did that?”

jj laughed with a shake of a head and turned y/n back toward the way they were walking. “the horses.”

“have i been that obvious about my cowgirl thing?” y/n asked eyeing both emily and jj.

“we assumed but the look in your eyes confirmed everything we were thinking.” emily shrugged with a knowing smirk.

y/n nodded in acceptance before turning to face jj, “in that case, i need to see you up on that steed, now.”

“i can’t believe you just said steed.” emily deadpanned.

after spending the day on her grandfathers farm, jj pulled the truck into the only small parking lot lit up. it was about 9pm and east allegheny had fully transitioned into night life mode. which in a small town means going to ‘the hidey hole’ for darts, beers, line dancing, and fried onion blossoms.

jj slid out of the truck first and emily followed from the passenger door. after refusing to let y/n ride in the bed of the truck, she insisted on being squished between them in the front. with both women out of the truck, she scooted her way to the edge of the driver’s side and hopped into jj’s waiting arms.

“i think we should get a truck.” she smiled dreamily as jj placed her on the ground.

“you’re only saying that because you’ve been wedged between us all day.” jj shook her head in amusement.

“well yes, but think of the easy access a truck allows.” y/n grinned mischievously.

emily blew a huff through her nose as she rounded the truck and stepped behind jj, caging the blonde between them. “now she makes a very good point. i think we should hear her out.”

jj’s cheeks reddened and her eyes rolled, “you two are trouble. i’m starting to regret bringing you both here.” y/n and emily laughed joyously before both kissing one of jj’s cheeks affectionately and releasing her.

they all filed into the bar and nabbed a tall table in the corner. with both y/n and emily seated, jj nodded her head toward the bar. “i’m gonna go get us some drinks and an onion blossom.”

“an onion what?” emily asked as jj walked away.

“i have no idea. i can’t lie though, i’m kinda excited.” y/n clapped happily. jj returned shortly with three beers wedged between her fingers and a plate of fried deliciousness.

“oh it’s definitely giving corn fed.” y/n grinned, pulling the onion blossom toward her side of the table eagerly.

“baby, why’s your face on the wall?” y/n asked as she and jj set up for a darts game.

“oh no reason—“ jj started to deflect but was quickly interrupted by a bumbling gruff guy leaning against the wall near them. “she’s the only person who’s ever gotten a single treble 20 in this town.”

y/n looked between the man and jj incredulously, “so you’re basically famous?”

jj shook her head with a smitten grin and the guy nodded his head in agreement. “she’s hidey hole royalty.”

“oh my god, em! jj’s royalty! come take my picture with her picture.” y/n called across the bar— much to jj’s dismay. she was positive those beers were finally hitting her girlfriend and she couldn’t help but to laugh as she watched her pose with the framed photo on the wall.

full of cheap beer and love, jj stopped the rusty truck in the backyard of her house. with the car in park she turned to her girlfriends with a smile. “wait here, i’ll be right back.” she darted up the back porch and quietly opened the screen door to enter. y/n and emily watched her go, but stayed put as they’d been told. when jj reemerged she was carrying piles of pillows and dragging blankets behind her. she threw them into the bed of the truck and pulled herself over the edge to situate everything comfortably. once the blankets were placed to her liking, she knocked on the back window and motioned for both women to join her.

“i can’t believe i ate something called an onion blossom.” emily groaned as she shuffled closer to y/n’s side.

“i can’t believe you wouldn’t line dance with us. that was a once in a lifetime experience.” y/n grumbled.

“you get so much more dramatic when you drink.” emily spoke into the younger woman’s hairline.

“you got a problem with that?” y/n asked feigning aggression.

“quiet you two, or i’ll ground you both.” jj reprimanded teasingly, eyes trained on the star filled sky. they all dissolved into giggles, feeling so light and so full of love that they couldn’t contain it. when they quieted down jj spoke softly. “when i was younger my grandfather would set up the truck like this for ros and i every weekend. it was my favorite part of the week.” y/n pulled jj closer as they quietly listened to her story. “it’s probably one of the things i miss the most about her. it was like our special time together. we didn’t argue, she wasn’t completely annoyed by my presence and it was our sister time.”

emily reached across y/n to twine her and jj’s fingers in support. “you know that reminds me of my summers in paris with my grandfather in his isolated cabin. we’d spend the day hiking and fishing. and end the night in a hammock identifying constellations.” emily recalled.

“i know you’ve both been together for so long, but i don’t think i’ll ever get tired of getting to know you both.” y/n smiled up at the stars squeezing both emily and jj affectionately. they hummed happily and enjoyed the clear night sky. a true perk of country living.

#jemily x reader #emily prentiss x reader #criminal minds x reader #jennifer jareau x reader #jemily #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #msschemmenti

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hauntedjellyfishwitch-blog · 3 months ago

Note

I have a request! If you’re comfortable? No one else will :(

Okay so you and Daryl are just settling in Alexandria, Daryl is very sexually frustrated but he doesn’t say anything, thinking he’s ridiculous.

Eventually one night the two of you are just relaxing or something, maybe you have your hand on his thigh or you kiss him innocently and he really tries to hide how turned on he is just from that.

There’s no sex because before you know it, you’re both kissing and Daryl is humping against the couch or your leg and he finishes way too soon.

Sorry it’s so long but pleeeeeease 🩷🩷

Wound Up

Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin.

Pairing: Daryl x Reader (No use of Y/N)

TW: Mild, non explicit smut. Light angst/tension. Humping!

A/N: Hi Anon, thanks for this request, I am sorry it's taken me SO long. I'm sure you could find another author to do it more justice than I can, but here you are! I am on a mad catch up, and this was edited quite quickly so if you notice any errors please yell at me but politely and with a tone that implies you're not mad at me because I am a millennial who already assumed you are.

It's been weeks. Which in the grand scheme of things is hardly any time at all, especially considering how long he has been able to go without affection in his life. But without her specifically? Without her, mere minutes feel like a lifetime. Which is all a poetic way of saying Daryl is absolutely dying to be inside her. Frustrated doesn’t begin to cover it, if they’d have had walls for the past few weeks he’d have been climbing them. He’s only avoided climbing the walls they currently have because he’s been too damn busy.

Pining isn’t the word he’d use, if he’s honest with himself, though he has been basically drooling over her since the moment they first spoke and if anyone catches him staring, longing even, at her whilst they build walls and hold meetings and settle in, well that’s just unfortunate timing and they should mind their own business. The word he’d use is…yearning, which is a synonym for pining he supposes so yes, okay if anyone absolutely needs to know it’s pining.

He hadn’t been comfortable with sex before her, sure there’d been a few trysts and one-night stands (mostly at Merel’s insistence). Those were different though, hurried and anonymous and awkward as all hell. She changed everything. She had waited patiently, but openly for him to be ready, had never made a secret of what or who she wanted, and he still finds it hard to believe, after all this time, that its him. She’d snapped a coil inside of him he didn’t realise had been tightly wound, and once he’d gotten past his shy, unsure learning, once he stopped doubting that she wanted him, he’d practically devoured her whole at every given opportunity. He’d never been so sated in his life.

But there’s so many other things to worry about now, and it’s not like they could have done it on the road even if they weren’t dehydrated and starving. Weeks.

He almost ravaged her in the kitchen when she came downstairs dressed for Deanna’s welcome party, but she’d been so excited to go that he couldn’t stand to ruin it, instead kissing her deeply and telling her how beautiful she was. He should have attended, in hindsight, maybe he could have snuck off to a closet or a room somewhere like they used to on runs. And its not that spaghetti at Aarons place is bad, really its not, the food is delicious and the company, though hard for him, is easier than it is from others, but Aaron keeps asking questions about his wife, and every time he hears her name he physically has to bite back a groan.

Has never really been one for touching himself, he always feels guilty afterwards and it’s not really the relief he’s craving so much as her. Someone should tell his dick that though, because he’s been half hard for most of the goddamn day.

It takes him ten, maybe fifteen minutes if he’d counted, to go from faux nonchalance to full blown hormone raging teenage style lust. She’s returned from the party a little after midnight, stripped off her ‘too tight’ dress and burrowed herself into one of his large t-shirts and a clean pair of underwear. It would alarm Merle that he found this sexier, for all of his older brothers interest in bimbo style clothing and makeup clad bar dwellers, Daryl finds himself the most attracted to her like this. He tells her as much as they lay intertwined on the sofa, with her thigh slotted between his as they chatter about their evenings.

He's fine, he’s totally fine and he’s definitely coming across like he’s fine. She’s definitely not concerned enough to touch her hand to his cheek, ask if he’s alright before kissing him gently. He shatters, lowering his mouth to her neck to taste her.

He can’t help himself, really he can’t, hips thrusting with every delicious scratch of her nails through his hair. He hasn’t formed a single word in minutes, entire conversation cut down to contented sighs and frustrated groans. He’s too gone to stop himself by the time he hears her sharp intake of breath, hips speeding up as he grinds the hard length of himself against her upper thigh.

He’s not just a considerate lover, he’s agonisingly thorough, has never once finished without getting her there first. But now? He’s needy, he’s desperate.

“Slow down, Honey”

Her voice is floating, far away and upstream and coming at him from somewhere with no concept of time or space; he takes in the warmth of it, the affection laced tone he’s so used to but he couldn’t recall what she’s said if he needed to under threat of death.

“Missed ya” he grumbles against her neck, voice drifting away to catch hers “missed ya s’much”

He’s loosely aware that he’s still in his jeans, they’re too tight and not tight enough and her hands are tugging the hair he’d washed earlier so he finds he doesn’t care. Hips jerking, grinding into her so he doesn’t have to pull away even an inch. Delicious friction. His whole body is on fire, lost in her. He’ll be embarrassed by this later, but now he cares for nothing beyond the tight grip he has around her body and the soft moans he can hear in his ear as his thigh grinds between her legs.

He sucks a bruising kiss against her neck, feels the wet patch against his leg grow larger, hears the moans deepen. Eyes glazed and jaw agape, letting out whines and grunts and groans he doesn’t even realise he’s making. Drowning in the smell of her, the warmth of her body and the tangy taste of dried sweat as his mouths her collarbone.

She leans in a little more, grazing the bulge in his pants as she runs a hand through his now clean hair. She’s missed this as much as he had. She hadn’t wanted to push, he’d been exhausted and anxious, eyes flitting around for signs of trouble but she opens her eyes in time to see his come undone, cock pulsing heavily as he ruts and ruts and ruts against her thigh before stilling.

“Fuck ‘m sorry” he huffs against her, hot breath fanning out over close skin. He finally opens his eyes, feels his own lopsided grin as he takes her in, pupils blown wide as he fingers grip the taut muscles of his arm.

“It’s alright” she smiles, and he’s not having that, is not going to let himself off the hook like she’s intending to, not ever but especially not when he can feel heat radiating against his leg, not when she’s looking at him like he’s dinner. He’s a considerate lover, agonisingly slow and thorough, but now? When he can see she’s needy and desperate. Now the fog in his brain is clearer?

He trails his hands down her body, smirking as she shivers. Safe, warm fingertips find their way to the waistline of her underwear.

“Le’me make it up t’ ya”

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dreamingonclds · 6 months ago

Text

My Girl | Hozier

Summary: Andrew ruins the surprise date that y/n had planned for him.

Pairing: Hozier x reader

Word Count: 2055

Warning(s): Very slight sexual activity, angst if you squint, fluff

Note: I did not edit this so, sorry if the grammar or writing is off. Also, this is my very first one shot. It ended in a different way than I expected and I don't know how to feel about it anymore. Enjoy!

As it was your last day with Andrew before leaving to go back home. You decided to surprise him with a romantic dinner once he got back from the studio. You slaved away all day in the kitchen making his favorite foods. As a testament of gratitude for everything he’s done for you this past month, spent with him in Wicklow. You decorated the dinner table and area all cute, with fairy lights, artificial vines, and scattered petals. You even put on a dress, his favorite, on you, and the lipstick he said made you look like you were touched by Aphrodite.

The time came when he was supposed to arrive and he didn’t. You didn’t want to even consider the possibility of ruining the surprise. So you didn’t call him right away, concluding that he was probably running a bit late like he sometimes does. A couple more hours went by and now the concern in your belly was getting hard to ignore. It was almost 12 am, he said he would be home by 8 pm. So you decided to shoot him a quick text.

Hey baby, everything okay?

He calls you back almost immediately.

“Hey darling, I’m sorry I got carried away and forgot to call you earlier. Me and the team decided to just order some food and eat here. I’ll be home in a bit, do you want me to pick you something up to take back?” He says rushing to get the words out, you hear the shuffling of feet getting away from the sound of banter and laughs.

You smile sadly at his sincerity.

“It’s okay, I get it. But umm…,” You interrupt your own speech as you look towards the beautifully set table and food you kept in the oven to keep warm. “I’m okay, I made dinner earlier, thanks for offering anyway. But you enjoy your dinner!” you continue.

“I am, you enjoy your dinner too-”

“I’ll try. Be safe, yeah?” You quickly respond cutting him off.

“Are you-”

You cut him off again, starting to feel a lump develop in your throat, and that shameful tickle in your chest.

“Hey I gotta go Andrew, don’t want the food to get cold.” you say and hang up before he can say anything else.

Your flight out of Ireland was at 6 am. You weren’t even packed, thinking that after dinner, Andrew could help you, because you knew he’d do most of it for you; as he did with other things. But also because you wanted to spend as much time with him before you left. But with your time of departure nearing, you decided to get a move on it.

By the time Andrew got home it was nearing 3 am. And you were nearly done packing, because you had stayed with him for a little over a month, your things were scattered throughout his house so it took a while. In the midst of you focused, trying to remember everything you had brought, you didn’t hear the front door open.

Andrew walks in quietly, believing that he would find you asleep. He quickly notices a light shining from inside the oven, he hurries over and opens it, thinking you accidentally left it on. But his eyebrows scrunch together when he sees it’s only the light on and his favorite meal in there, untouched.

He stands up straight from his crouching position and walks out to the dining area. He quickly notices the dining table, set with empty plates, wine glasses and the vase with flowers you guys picked together. The almost completely melted taper candles were an indication that you had been waiting for him for a while.

Once the realization hits him, he mutters a single word.

“Fuck.” he brings his hand to his face, rubbing it over. He turns himself and begins to walk towards the bedroom. But, his guilty conscience makes him look back to the table. His imagination quickly fills of you, wondering just what you must have been feeling. He thinks to blow out the candles but turns his back to them, they’re on their last breath anyway; he thinks.

He carefully opens the bedroom door, still believing you are asleep. But he pauses when he sees you standing there, lost in thought. But beautiful, all dolled up in his favorite dress of yours.

Your eyes shoot to the opening door, and the first thing you notice is his sorry face. Before you can mutter a word, a letter even. He rushes over to you

“Darling, I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. I didn’t know. One of the guys mentioned getting pizza and everybody was on board with it so I agreed and,” he rambles on, both his hands rubbing your arms.

“Why are you leaving me…over that darling, it’s not worth it. I know I fucked up, I know that, I know. But I can fix it, I promise you I will fix it. It was so stupid of me, but it won’t ever happen again.” he continues, one of his hands had made its way to your face, gently cupping your jaw and caressing your cheek.

And then it hits you, he walked in and saw you packing. He must think that you are actually leaving him, he must’ve forgotten your flight back.

Before he can continue, you ease his worry.

“Baby, I’m not breaking up with you. I’m okay, I promise” you say as you look up to him and look into his eyes,you take his torso in your arms and rub him soothingly. His eyebrows furrow together, he’s still confused, he really doesn’t remember.

You take his hand and lead him over to the empty side of the bed free of your luggage. You push his chest lightly, encouraging him to sit down. And he does, pulling you down to sit in his lap.

“Then…what are you doing?” He asks, one hand sitting on your bum and the other toying with the fabric of your dress.

“I’m leaving, remember, back home.” You say, one arm around his shoulders playing with the loose strands of hair coming out of his bun.

“Ohh” he lets out a sigh and puts his head into your neck, peppering your collarbone with kisses, mumbling sorrys in between each of them.

“Baby. Baby. Baby” he says, each one spaced out.

“I am so sorry. That I truly forgot about. I am so so sorry. I can’t believe I just let that pass my mind. Oh my god what is wrong with me.” he rambles guiltily.

You remove your hands from his hair and try to coax them into his face, softly lifting him out of the crook of your neck. You give him a gentle smile and give him a soft kiss.

“It’s okay.” you say genuinely, nodding your head.

“No it’s not.” he responds matter of factly.

“You forgot baby, it happens-” you try to reassure him but he cuts you off with a kiss.

“Be honest love, how’d it make you feel?” he asks, lips brushing against yours. Your head naturally hangs down, the feeling of humiliation overtaking you once again. But the feeling of his large hand rubbing over your thigh offers comfort for you to tell him the truth, but not enough.

“Ugh” you groan in embarrassment, quickly hugging him so as to not meet his gaze, your cheeks warming with the feeling.

“Oh darling.” he returns the act and rubs your exposed back. “How do I make it up to you baby?” he asks you, and you can tell he means it.

“It’s okay, I mean it.” you state, pulling away and meeting his eyes. He gives you an understanding smile, and brings his hand to your face. Moving your hair from your face and lightly touching your lips, you give his thumb a soft peck.

“You are too good for me.” he admits. You don’t know what to say, so you don’t say anything. You shake your head in disagreement and give his jaw a peck. Your phone buzzes from the bed and he turns and reaches for it, handing it to you.

“Shit.” you say, getting up and off of him, realizing the time.

“Babe, we have to hurry!” you hurry back to your luggage.

“We have to leave soon or I'll miss my flight.” you throw the last few things in your suitcase.

“Oh yeah” he says, coming over to you. “Let me do that.” he tells you when he sees you trying to close it.

“I’m gonna go get my clothes.” you say and run out to the laundry room, picking up the outfit you planned to wear for your long flight. Walking back into the bedroom, you see Andrew moving your luggage to the floor. You reach to try and unhook the back of your dress when he comes up and hugs you from behind. He then turns you to face him and shamelessly checks you out, his eyes fixed on your cleavage before he speaks.

“ I love this dress.” he says meeting your eyes.

“I know, I can tell.” you giggle.

He leans down, bringing his lips to yours, you tiptoe, trying to make up for the height difference. A passionate makeout ensues, his hands give your bum gentle squeezes. His mouth finds your neck and you release soft moans, almost giving in as he backs you into the bed.

“As much as I would like to babe, I can’t. I have to leave, like now or I’ll miss my flight.” you say breathlessly, your body almost betraying you as his lips make their way from your jaw to your chest. Your hands go to his hair instinctively as he continues to go lower and lower.

“Babe, seriously, we don’t have time” trying to catch your breath, you sit up, forcing him up as well. He gives you a cheeky smile, offering his hand to help you to your feet.

“It’s like you’re trying to keep me from leaving.” you run your hands through your hair in an effort to put yourself together.

“That's exactly what i'm trying to do” he stands with his hands on his hips, just endearingly looking at you, taking you in. You look up to him, and a laugh leaves your mouth when you see your lipstick transferred to his face.

“This would be so much worse if it wasn’t for your beard” you say in between small laughs, circling your mouth, in reference to his. He turns his head towards the mirror and laughs when he catches sight of the damage.

“Yours isn’t any better.” he turns back to you and wipes the tip of your nose that somehow managed to catch the rosy tint. You return the favor, wiping his lips with the best of your ability. Then you rest your hand on his cheek, he turns his head towards it and gives your palm a kiss. You give him a pouty smile, and your chest aches, realizing just how much you don’t want to leave him.

“My girl.” he says, mouth still in your hand. He holds your wrist there for a few more seconds before he gives it one last kiss and gently lets go.

“You’re making this really hard.” you admit. You turn your back to him and step away, not being able to look at him any longer. Your hands go back to small hooks of your dress, when you hear a sigh from behind you.

“At least let me take the dress off of you, one way or another.” he offers, referring to your prior denial of both your unholy desires. You chuckle and let him help, shivering whenever his fingertips meet your skin.

With no time left to spare due to the hour drive to the airport, you slipped on your comfy clothes and grabbed your belongings. The drive there was full of avoidance from the both of you, not wanting to talk about being away from each other. So instead, the conversation was full of the best memories you had in the emerald isle. And once you arrived at the airport, you sat in the car for as long as you could, not wanting a single second to go to waste where you couldn’t be together.

#fan fiction #fanfic #scenarios #imagines #oneshots #for you #fiction #original story #hozier #hozier x reader #hozier x y/n #hozier x you #hozier fanfiction #hozier fic #hozier fanfic #hozier imagine #hozier one shot #hozier oneshot #hozier x oc

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shycloudkitty · 1 year ago

Text

His Sweetest Escape

Summary: Leon returned from a mission. Safe but exhausted and traumatized as hell. He doesn't want to drown in the suffocating thoughts of survivor's guilt. He wants an escape. And you were always his sweetest escape.

Pairing: RE6 Leon Kennedy! × Fem! Reader

Tags: (NSFW 18+), MDNI, FWB relationship, Angst at first, talking about Leon's trauma (necessary for the plot), Oral (f receiving!), Cunnilingus, fingering, sitting on Leon's face, nipple play, Leon being a tease. A bit ooc? Probably.

A/N: Hello Guys!!! My FIRST smut fic is here🤭. Yes I know…FWB again, but I just really wanted to write a smut fic with that trope😭. Also I am very serious about minors not interacting with this post. Please don't.

(Edit) : This can be considered a sort of rough prequel to Just a little touch. Cause for a prequel I have something else cooking up🤭

Hope you enjoy this and have a good day!! 😊😊

A huge thanks to @elfven-blog and @luniaxi for helping me a lot. A little birthday (belated) present to @nexysworld 🥰

Dividers by: @/cafekitsune

WC: 5.6K

Another mission. Another horde of zombies and tyrants. And dozens and dozens of lives that he wasn't able to save in time. But it was a successful mission or at least that's what he was told by his superiors.

Leon tiredly pushed open the door to his apartment and deeply sighed as he slowly entered and closed the door behind him.

It is said that a home perfectly reflects people's personalities. The things there give bits of how a person lives and wants to live, their likes and dislikes and much more.

And his cold and empty apartment gave a perfect reflection on who he was. The furniture was there, furnished of course. But that was it. No decorations or signs of someone living there. And that's how he felt he was. A person who had all the features of a normal person but cold and empty on the inside.

But then again he never found a home. This was just a place to live in.

Leon found a whiskey bottle from the liquor cabinet and dropped to the couch, groaning as he sat down after a long time feeling his injuries stretch uncomfortably making him wince. Leaning his head back and staring at the empty ceiling, flashbacks of the mission running wild in his mind. Taking a big swig of his whiskey to numb it. Trying to forget everything about that God forsaken assignment.

Leon kept drinking and drinking till he started to feel a bit numb to it and sighed tiredly to himself and pushed the bottle aside. Allowing himself to get a bit lost in his thoughts and closed his eyes.

He was so fucking tired of all this fighting, fighting it to no fucking end and never seeing the ray of hope that all of this shit would end one day. Instead it only got worse. And he fucking hated it.

His survivor's guilt continued to eat at him slowly and bit by bit on his consciousness, till he felt suffocated by it.

He opened his eyes, taking a deep breath and groaned in frustration. The fuck was wrong with him? Actually don't answer that, he already knows.

He took a deep breath to calm himself. Closing his eyes and taking small deep breaths.

Leon shook his head to himself and sighed again. This wasn't going to go away anytime soon. And he really didn't want to wallow and drown in the guilt or he was sure it would kill him more than it already had. He wanted an escape.

A sweet escape that always made him forget about the hellish missions and the guilt that comes with it.

He opened his phone and searched for your contact and pressed the call button. Bringing the phone to his ear as it rang.

For some reason he felt a bit guilty for only calling you for these things, which was weird because it has always been like this between you both… and neither of you minded it before.

Maybe he needs this more than he thought.

“Hey handsome” Your sweet voice rang in his ear from the other side of the call making his mood a bit better.

He cleared his throat and said “Hey… Doing anything right now?” Trying not to sound too desperate for her and playing it cool.

“Sort of… But… I can be free if you want~” trying to tease him a little bit.

A small smile bloomed on his face when he heard that and teasingly replied. “You will make time for me huh? That's sweet.”

You chuckle and tease him back. “Oh you know… I could never say no to you…or a good time.”

Your teasing words made Leon smile a bit more. Knowing you could always tease him a little and get away with it and he wouldn't mind it even once cause he loved the tease.

Leon then says. “Then be free and come here.”

“Uff… So bossy. Can't add a ‘please’ in your sentence?” You asked in a playful way.

“One more comment out of your smart mouth and I will come to your apartment to show you how bossy I can actually be.” Voice getting sultry as he teased you.

It's not like it will be the first time he bossed a sweet thing like you around… always so eager to please him, following the orders he used to give you while you were a moaning & whimpering mess but oh, so ready to do them… just for him.

How could he not feel like a God when you were always ready to be his devoted worshiper.

There was a beat of silence, and Leon smirked knowing that teasing worked perfectly in making you flustered.

He took the opportunity and said “Hmm… that's what I thought, now come here…please” emphasizing the word please more on purpose.

You lightly huff over the phone. “You know you are making a lot of promises.” your voice was clearly flustered even if you tried to hide it.

“Cause I can keep ‘em. I don't make empty promises and you know that…” His voice lowered. He knew how much he had an effect on you, and he couldn't help but use it to his advantage.

Leon waited for a response.

“...I do.” your voice came out more breathy than he expected.

“Good girl… now come soon. I am waiting.”

He cut the call and tossed his phone aside, taking a deep breath. He wasn't going to lie to himself, he got plenty worked up from just one call and it was probably less than a minute.

You were a damn vixen and he loved it.

Now that you were most certainly coming over, he could at least take a shower. He got up from the couch with a groan and stretched his arms a bit and made his way to his bathroom.

Removing his gear and soiled work clothes, he got in the shower and turned it on. Letting the water slowly wash the grime and dried blood away along with the horrible memories of the mission.

Instead he focused his thoughts on you. He let his mind slowly fill with the sweet memories of you. Your soft red lips against his… They tasted like candy, sometimes cherry but always something sweet.

And he especially loved when your pretty lips were wrapped around his cock…slowly taking him in and looking up at him with those greedy eyes all your senses focused on him to pleasure him.

How could he not want a sweet thing like you around forever?

But he wouldn't admit that out loud.

Leon could feel himself get more worked up as he felt more images fill up in his head and groaned quietly.

He huffed lightly, and quickly finished his shower and got out of it. Moving towards his wardrobe and wearing his sweatpants and one of his casual blue t-shirt. And decided to wait till you arrived.

15 mins later his doorbell rang and he grinned at the thought that it was you. And quickly walked towards the door and opened it.

And there you were, a smile on your face and a soft blush on your cheeks. Wearing a white crop top and blue jeans to pair it up with and he couldn't help but smirk at the sight. He bit his lip lightly and teasingly said. “You came huh?”

You rolled your eyes and smiled playfully at his words. “You called.” your voice being equally teasing.

He grinned and let you inside his apartment and closed the door behind you.

“When did you come back from your mission?” You asked as you went over and sat on the couch and looked at him.

“Today actually…” Leon said as he came over and sat beside you. You raised an eyebrow and said. “Today... Like..Just now?”

Leon nodded and shrugged lightly and looked at you. “Yeah. Why?”

Your eyes widened and said. “Wow… aren't you tired and sleepy as hell?”

Leon chuckled and shrugged. “No, not really.”

Well to be fair he was exhausted but that's why you were here… to take it all away.

You frowned slightly not believing his words. After all, he was gone for a considerably long time. You then slowly ask. “Are you sure?”

Leon just chuckled and teasingly replied with a smirk. “Don't worry your pretty little head about it… Although I am flattered that you care that much about my health.”

While he was grateful that you were concerned for him, he didn't want to talk about it. He would rather focus on you and get lost in you than talk about his awful work.

You roll your eyes and smirk at him and playfully reply. “Please… I am only asking because I don't think you will be able to last if you just came back home tired as hell.”

You knew what you were doing, but again a little friendly fire never hurts anyone. And in this, you don't care if it hurts you.

Leon looks at you in amusement and scoffs lightly, shifting closer to you as his voice lowered. “You think I wouldn't be able to last long hmm?” Slowly bringing his hand to your thigh and caressing it gently while looking in your eyes.

You bite your lip and slowly say. “You heard what I said… Did I hit the nail with that?”

No, but you did hurt his ego. And he was going to prove exactly how wrong you are. All in the name of friendly fire.

Leon started to gently run his fingers to your inner thighs and rub teasing circles there. His hand inching closer and closer... but never touching you where you really wanted him to.

His lips curve in a smirk and biting his lip lightly. “You really think that huh...” his hot breath hitting your neck. His gaze falling on your lips, on how you are slowly biting them.

Your face grows flushed and goosebumps rise on your skin as he… slowly moves his free hand on your other thigh and does the same thing there. His smirk grows wider when he feels you squirming a bit.

Everything around you feels so much hotter now… his touch, his eyes shamelessly tracing every inch of your soft body.

Leon watched as you cleared your throat and looked away from him. “Not really… I was just joking, you know.”

Leon smirked some more and teasingly repeated your words. “Just joking hmm?”

Your breath hitches when Leon presses his lips on your neck and presses feather light kisses on it while gently nibbling on it too. You tilt your head back giving him better access, eyes fluttering shut as his teeth lightly scrape your skin.

Your perfume slowly fills his senses and makes his mind hazy with lust. You smelled so fucking good to him. All this teasing was doing a number on him. So much so that now all he wanted to do was to fuck you dumb against this couch and still keep going.

He gently bites your earlobe and mumbles. “Can't have you making jokes everywhere on serious matters baby…”

You gasp as he suddenly spreads your thighs apart, settling himself between them. His bites on your neck get a bit more harsher as his hands start sliding to your ass. Gripping them tightly and bringing you close, pressing you against the couch and him.

He then whispers. “Can't have a sweet thing like you leaving my bed thinking my cock wasn't good enough for your pussy…”

You squirmed in his grip as his words shoot straight at your core. His touch felt as if it was burning right through your skin. You opened your mouth to say something and a small whimper escaped your lips as he bit down on a much sensitive part of your neck.

“Oh Leon…” You mumbled and looked at him. And he quickly sealed your lips with a kiss and mumbles against your lips. “I know baby, You love that cock don't you? Love how good it feels when it ruins your little cunt.”

A small mewl left your mouth as two of his fingers reached your center, sliding them up and down on your clothed cunt giving you the stimulation you were craving.

Leon smirked at your little sounds and snakes his other hand under your crop top, slowly groping your right breast in his hand. And tauntingly says. “Yeah…Feels good when I give that cunt a bit of attention, Doesn't it? Already squirming under my fingers and I haven't even started.”

Your body grew hotter as his fingers started to rub small circles over your cunt and now groping your breasts a bit harshly now. You can feel your panties getting wet from his teasing and lean more into his fingers to search for that friction. You whine and pout at him. “Leon…Stop teasing.”

He bites your earlobe. “You try to tell me what I should…And teasing you will be all I do tonight.” You pouted him in response and he just gave you a teasing grin.

As he says that he pinches one of your nipples making you jolt in surprise. You whine as he continues to pinch and roll it teasingly between his fingers drawing a needy moan from you.

He then pulls away slightly and starts to unbutton your jeans and kisses you. He lightly tugs at your lower lip, giving you a pleasant shiver down your spine. Removing your jeans he cups your ass and drags it a bit closer for him to see. Smirking at the wet spot on your cute lacy panties.

Soft moans and whimpers fall off your lips as he presses his thumb on your clit over the thin layer of the fabric and rubs slow teasing circles.

His free hand makes its way to your chest and eagerly lifts your crop top and tugs your bra down to free your breasts. And latches his mouth to one of them and eagerly starts to suck on them, not even bothering to fully remove it.

He then starts to slowly suck on your nipples taking his sweet time with it while still paying attention to your cunt. His eyes are shut as if he was concentrating on the world's most important task ever. Your moans started to get louder and more whiny, and feel the flimsy fabric of your panties sticking to your folds by now.

He suddenly pinches your clit at the same time he gives a harsh tug at your nipple. Your body twitches from the sensation and you whine louder than before. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you gasped for breaths.

You looked down to see his face and whined to him. “Leon, I want more…please.” Your voice was more breathy than before. You gave him a pout and looked at him with those same needy eyes which he usually gave into.

He feels so proud for having you this way, seeing how quickly you used to melt for him and gave him the control he was so desperately craving without any resistance. And he loved it every single time. Seeing your red pouty lips, eyes filled with lust, messed up hair, flushed face, it made his heart skip a few beats every time… He could always get lost in your beauty and he wouldn't have it any other way.

Leon presses a kiss at your temple and drops another at your shoulder. And smirks and in a taunting tone whispers. “We just started baby, Already can't last hmm?”

Ass. That's what he was. An ass for using your words against you.

He then pulls back and you whine at the loss of his touch. Panting softly, your skin feeling as if it was burning under his hot gaze. You look up at him and he wasn't any better but he had a better control on it.

He grins and kisses you softly on the lips to make up for the teasing and softly asks “Want to move this to the bedroom?” You nod and kiss him back. Wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling him close.

You both kiss each other softly and he slowly removes the rest of your clothes and lifts you up in his arms and slowly stands up. You wrap your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. Your hands gripping his shoulders and continue to kiss him softly while he makes his way to his bedroom.

He places his hands on your hips to hold you and never breaks the kiss even once. If anything he pulls you more close and deepens the kisses. He opens his bedroom door and slowly lays you down on bed and pulls away a bit and smiles at you and softly whispers. “Want more?”

You nod and he leans in close and deepens the kiss. Gently caressing your body all over, his hands kneading the soft plush fat of your thighs and hips. Tongue exploring your mouth sensually while kissing you. Both of your eyes closed while enjoying the sensual kisses and touches. This was much calmer than what you both were doing earlier but still very sensual to keep you both going.

“Feeling better?” He mumbles against your lips.

You chuckle softly and in a teasing tone reply. “I would feel much better when you actually start.”

You feel a deep rumble from his chest as he laughs softly at that and shakes his head lightly. His voice takes a quick change from soft to sweetly seductive and whispers. “Fucking insatiable…Love it. Who could tell that a cutie like you was such a slut inside. But you are not gonna hear any complaints from me.”

Your cheeks burn red from his words as he now starts to kiss your neck and collarbone. A moan slipped from your mouth when he pressed himself forward and his boner made contact with your sensitive clit, letting you feel how much he was turned on right now. The cloth of his sweatpants gave enough friction to feel amazing as you started to grind against him, wanting to continue where he left off.

Soft grunts slipped from his mouth as he felt you eagerly rub your pussy against him. A rough chuckle leaves his lips and he mumbles. “Patience baby…” and moves his hips away to stop it, pulling a whine from your mouth from frustration.

He brings your lips in a deep kiss which you were more than happy to respond to. His hands found their way back to your chest to your breasts. Groping and massaging them and giving light tugs at your nipple which made your body twitch in excitement.

He then tugged your lower lip, gave a harsh bite to it and tweaked your nipple lightly. He continues this motion of torturing you like this. While you lay there under him writhing and moaning for him. “Leon… I can't take it… please..”

The little piece of shit just laughs and tweaks your nipples once more making you whimper for him. And in a taunting tone says. “Oh yeah? You can't take it hmm? Too damn bad…”

You feel him rubbing those little buds under his thumb sometimes rolling it between his fingers while basically tongue fucking your mouth. You whimper, whine and even try to push him off but if anything that encourages him to do more of that.

Soon you feel that invisible band in your stomach stretching and stretching… just waiting to snap. And Leon notices it, the way your body starts shivering and your moans get louder. He then leans in to whisper. “Gonna cum baby?”

You nod and look at him with a pout. “Please…” He just smirks and keeps doing what he was doing. Your body twitches and holds onto his shoulders. Your eyes flutter shut. You are just so close… Right… there.

And he pulls away.

Your eyes immediately shoot open. “Nooo!” A loud whine leaves your lips and look up at him with a frustrated expression.

How could he do this to you? Such a fucking tease? And you were so fucking close and he just had to pull away and ruin it.

He had a big shit eating grin on his face but he wasn't faring any better than you were. His shirt was clinging to his body, face flushed red and his hair messed up. And the way you can see his dick bulging in his pants proved he was just as pent up as you.

He was just teasing both of you to hell. Asshole.

You gave a pout as the tears from frustration started to brim in your eyes. “You are so mean…”

Leon smiles as he leans down closer to you and softly coos to you. “Aww… is my baby angry at me?”

You nod and continue to pout at him. Leon smiles and takes your face in his hands. And kisses you gently on your soft lips. You don't kiss him back at first but you hear his soft whispers to forgive him for teasing you so much. “Please baby… forgive me? I swear I wouldn't tease you now… Kiss me back?”

And you really wanted to stay mad at him but… you couldn't do that for much long.

How could you when he looked at you with those blue lust blown eyes and gave you soft kisses across your face to make you forgive him?

You then slowly kissed him back and he was more than happy to oblige. Kissing you softly, taking his time to ease you and then he says. “Ride my face? I promise I will let you cum this time..”

Your face went red and your eyes widened and mumbled against his lips. “Really? Are you sure you want me to do that?”

You feel him nod, lightly tugging at your lower lip and say. “Of course…Want that pretty pussy of yours on my face.”

It's not like this was your first time riding his face either...

Your face goes red but you are more excited than embarrassed. You nod and kiss him back with more fervor. “Okay… I will.”

He pulls away and finally removes his clothes. Removing his sweatpants and freeing his cock from it. Groaning softly as his cock slaps against his stomach. Precum leaking from his cock. Spreading it with his thumb from his tip to the rest and lightly strokes himself. Hissing at how sensitive his cock was from all that teasing.

Your mouth waters at the sight of him naked. His body was littered with scars but that only made him more alluring at this moment. You just wanted to kiss and nibble on each scar till he was red from all the hickeys. It always took your breath away when you watched him like this.

You lick your lips and come closer to him and give him your most innocent doe eyes and make your voice as seductive as possible. “Can I taste you?”

Leon feels his cock twitch at the request and lightly bites his lips. He was really really tempted to take you up on that offer but he had other plans…

He tilts your chin up and says. “Look at you… so eager for this cock hmm? Already want to wrap your pretty lips on it.”

You feel yourself getting more slicked from his words and eagerly nod. “Yes…please, want to suck your cock so bad…”

Leon smirks and gives a teasing kiss on your lips. “Some other time baby, want you to ride my face today.”

Your face flushes deep red and nod. “Okay…”

He grins and lays back down on bed adjusting himself with pillows under his head and motions for you to come up.

You bite your lip and slowly crawl over to him. Slowly bringing your thighs on either side of his head, hands grasping at the headboard as you position yourself over his face.

A loud groan leaves his lips as his eyes locks down at your drenched cunt. He licks his lips and feels his mouth water, he immediately grasps your hips and thighs and positions your cunt in front of his hungry mouth.

You gasp softly as you feel him suddenly shift you more and look down at how hungrily he was looking at you.

Leon moves his hands to your ass and squeezes it gently. And looks at you. “Come on baby sit. And don't hover, don't want to waste a drop of you” His words make your stomach flip. Your heart thundering in your chest as you try to come up with something to say but feel your words stuck in your throat.

You bite your lips and follow his words. And slowly sit down on his face and the moan he let's out when his tongue makes contact with your clit was downright pathetic. He immediately tightens his grip around your thighs and your ass, closing his eyes and lapping at your cunt happily.

You moan softly as you feel his tongue give you lazy, slow licks from your labia to your clit. Taking his time with it, slowly tasting through your folds. Swirling his tongue around your already sensitive clit giving it occasional tugs with his teeth.

Your body twitches above him as your moans turn into cries of pleasure. Trying to move away from his face but he grunts and grabs your ass and pulls you back in. Giving your ass a light spank, “Don't move…”

You squeal and close your eyes as you focus on his tongue, trying not to move that much. Biting your lip, one of your hands makes into his hair. He groans at the feeling of your fingers lightly threading through his hair. And pushes his tongue inside your sopping hole, slowly fucking you with it.

He moans when he feels your juices on his tongue. You always tasted like a fucking heaven to him. He could stay between your thighs all day if he could. Drinking what you had to give to him while hearing sweet chorus of whines and moans as they left your mouth, his own favorite music to listen to when he came back home from those fucked up missions.

You were his personal haven, letting him have you like this, he felt the luckiest man in the world. Feeling you tug his hair, squirming on his mouth and still riding his mouth like it was your last day on earth. He fucking loved it. He could get off on having you just like this.

Your thighs squeeze around his head and tug at his hair a bit harder than necessary pulling a groan out of him. It only encouraged him to fuck his tongue into you faster. You squealed a bit as lifted you up a bit only to feel two of his fingers enter your cunt drawing a long moan out of you. Slowly sliding in and out of you, your wet walls eagerly sucking him back in.

A loud groan leaves your lips when he starts to suck on your clit too. “Oh fuck…Leon!” Hips moving on its own, as he continues to finger you and tug at your clit. Curling his fingers inside and moving them against the spot which always made you see stars. Your body twitches and eyes roll in the back of your head as he moves his fingers faster.

His fingers constantly assaulting that sweet spot within you, sometimes slowing them down to hear your pretty whines of protest and suddenly increasing the pace just to fuck with you. Feeling your thighs squeeze around his head tightly drawing a loud groan from him, the vibrations going straight to your core and giving you an instant jolt of pleasure.

All the teasing slowly piled up and you felt that familiar band in your core just waiting to snap at any moment. You clenched tightly around his fingers. He hummed in satisfaction as he felt you do that, removing his fingers and pushing his tongue inside, wanting you to cum on his tongue instead.

He held your hips tightly to support you and let you ride his face as much as you wanted. Both of your hands going down to his hair, tugging at it while riding his face at your pace. Your clit constantly bumping against his nose making you a moaning mess above him. “Fuckkkk… Leon… feels so good… Just like that! Fuck! Yes!”

His eyes roll in the back of his head as he feels the stinging pain as you tug at his hair. Loving the pain and pleasure that came with it. One of his hands goes down to his cock and stroking himself in time with the pace that you set. Feeling himself getting closer and closer as you both kept going.

He felt he could burst at any moment just from hearing the lewd noises you both were making. And he wouldn't have it any other way.

You open your eyes, your gaze drifting to the sight of him between your legs. And it instantly brought you closer to the edge than ever. His eyes were screwed shut, focused on giving you the high you were so eagerly chasing. His grip on your ass was tight enough to leave bruises, not that you cared.

You loved seeing his marks on your body anyway.

“M’ gonna cum… so close…” you whined as you looked down at him. His eyes opened to look at the heavenly sight of you writhing above him and smirked.

He winked at you and moved his tongue faster inside you and gave you a sudden spank from the hand that was already gripping you while he stroked himself with the other.

You whine from the spank and feel that band inside you finally snap “Leon!”. He soon comes after you with a loud groan and hisses as ropes of thick hot cum fall on his thighs and abs.

Your body twitches and shakes when the euphoria flows through your body. You felt so lightweight, feeling like you could drop at any moment. Leon gently grasped your waist with one hand and the other on your thigh, slowly helping you ride through your high. And eagerly drank up every drop. Humming softly in satisfaction.

You whined softly still feeling his tongue swirl around your clit. You tried to get off of him whining softly in protest and he gently lowered you down in bed. His chin was soaked with your release as he wiped it away with the back of his hand.

He brought you close to him, pressing you against him and giving soft kisses on your forehead and cheeks. Both of you were breathing heavily in each other's arms. His soft kisses act as a soothing balm to your tired body.

You gently caressed his hair and face in return as he started to pepper kisses along your collarbone now. “Feeling good?” Leon's soft voice entered your dazed mind. You smiled lazily at him and sighed softly. “I feel amazing…”

Leon chuckled and gave a soft kiss to your crown and pulled you closer. “Good…I would be disappointed otherwise.”

You chuckled and teasingly say. “In me or yourself?” He snickered and replied “You of course. I am amazing at what I do.”

You raise an eyebrow at him and say. “And I am not?” Leon smirked and bit your earlobe playfully. “That’s up for debate…”

You scoffed, giving him an offended look at him and narrowed your eyes at him “Excuse me?”

Leon had to bite back a chuckle as he saw you trying to be serious, and he could tell that you weren't serious either. Seeing your smile threatening to take over your face.

You huff when you saw a chuckle slipping from him. “You are laughing at me aren't you?” Still keeping your eyes narrowed at him.

Leon cleared his throat, trying his best to be serious. “No, I would never laugh at you.”

You rolled your eyes at him and said. “Liar.”

Leon chuckled, shaking his head in amusement and playfully whispered. “You look cute when you are angry.”

Your eyes widened at his words and looked away from him to hide your blushing face from his comment “Whatever.”

Leon chuckled. “Uh huh… What is this then?” Poking at your red cheeks.

You pouted at him and huffed. “Nothing okay? Just shut up.”

Leon’s snickered and a mischievous grin spread on his face. “You want me to shut up? Sit on my face again and then I will think.”

Leon's smirk widened as he saw your face flush red and looking away from him, squirming slightly as you thought about doing it again. Leon squished your cheeks and turned your face back towards him and looked at you with a smug face.

“You want to sit on my face again don't you?” A knowing smug smile on his face.

Your face turned beet red as you felt yourself heat up again from his words and slowly nodded.

Leon smirked and started to kiss your neck all over again and mumbled. “So...fucking...insatiable.”

This was sure as hell gonna be a long night for both of you. But none of you had any complaints.

God. It's done. Oh my god. FINALLY. I honestly didn't expect this to take so much of my time but it surprisingly did. I guess it did cause it's my first time writing smut rather than consuming it lol.

Anyways... I hope you liked this fic. Hope it made your day!!🥰😊.

Until next time 😊❤

-Bella

#resident evil #resident evil 6 #leon kennedy #leon kennedy × reader #infinite darkness #leon kennedy angst #leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy × you #leon re6 #leon vendetta #reader insert #x reader #death island leon #older leon kennedy #bella fics #leon kennedy× y/n #fem reader #leon kennedy fluff #leon scott kennedy

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usagiarchive · 9 days ago

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angel of the codeine scene — [06] who i am, who am i?

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sypnosis. [ 1.3k words. no warnings. ] — as the dream gets more vivid, so does your will to discover who you truly are to Xiao.

usagi's note: i didn't attend my class today, so here i edited this early just because hehe, also wdyt aby my new theme (ily clorinde)

You dream of him once again.

Xiao.

And you know it really is him because you hear what he says this time. He talks to you the same way he did when he told you not to leave him again.

It's unfamiliar to you, the tone he speaks in, you don't know it's name, you don't know what to make of it, but you can feel it in the dreams.

And this time, when you wake, you remember bits and pieces of the dream. Some still slip from the net of your mind, but you remember those that linger.

This time it was in a field.

(Xiao was walking beside you, it felt like you were watching a show. You couldn't hear what he was talking about, but the place you're in was familiar.

And you know you've seen this while on patrol with him.

You can see his mouth moving but you can't hear what he's saying.

When he turns to look at you and smiles…

You wake.)

It leaves you more frustrated, being so close to finding out who Xiao really is to you- or rather who you are to him, but the dream remnants keep slipping and you're forced to leave the dream memories.

You have to find answers.

…

Verr sees you at dawn, fully dressed and carrying a satchel of your books and papers.

“Oh, where are you going, sweetheart?”

You halt in place, “The harbor, Miss Verr, I’m going to meet Baizhu-yisheng,”

Her eyebrow raises, “This early?”

“It's an emergency,”

“Wouldn't it be faster with your Adeptus?” she asks, but before she could finish with her question, you were already out of the room.

“Bye, Miss Verr!”

…

See, lying to the woman who took care of you constantly when Xiao wasn't around did make you feel very guilty. But you weren't exactly sure if Xiao would allow you to talk to Ganyu alone.

The past few weeks he has been more present, he eats with you now, asks how your lessons with Baizhu have gone, he keeps you closer during patrols.

After that… kiss (as you've learned from Baizhu, who was very surprised to have learned that Xiao was the one who initiated), he has been somewhat closer to you. More allowing of touch and help.

But he still does not talk much and the dreams get more and more vivid as the time passes.

At the bridge of the harbor, you felt the restrictions Morax had told you about, it was a miracle you even made it this far.

You could see the gold threads in your veins pulsing with light under your sleeves as you fought to walk all the way to Ganyu’s workplace.

Your body and mind keeps telling you you should turn back, return to Xiao, be by his side. But you know you have to get answers.

The dreams are dreams, and as you've told Morax, it has to mean something.

The man of course did not answer your inquiries, only telling you that he'll tell you in due time, sometime soon, he says.

The moment you make it, Madame Ping is there. She urges you to sit as she sees your barely conscious form, as she retrieves Ganyu for you.

The headache feels like you're about to split your head.

…

Ganyu is more than happy to tell you what she knows, but it also leaves you at a dead end.

“We were in different encampments during the war,” she explains, “I stayed with Madam Guizhong, while he stayed with Rex Lapis,”

She puts a finger to her chin as she thinks, “Though I did hear from Indarias that he had a human with him most of time, he became um… what's the term, a bodyguard! Yes, he became a bodyguard for them,”

“Did… did you know anything else about them?”

Ganyu shakes her head, “No, sadly, after that news, the Great War descended rapidly, and I lost contact with Xiao and the other Adepti for a while,”

“The next time we met was when Rex Lapis was hailed as the Geo Archon and we were rebuilding Liyue,”

You stared down at the cup of tea at defeat. The headache was even worse and Ganyu noticed it.

“Hey, are you sure you don't want to take this back to Wangshu Inn?” she asks.

“No, he'll know I'm here if we return,”

“Can't he sense you?”

You shake your head, “No, I learned how to conceal adeptal energy from Morax-shen,”

Her face goes into surprise, “That's… very impressive, wow, not even a millenia old and you've already mastered it?”

She smiles at you, “You're learning well,”

“Thank you,” you smile, then sigh, “I still haven't found out who that human was to him…”

It's Madame Ping that speaks now, “The human was a healer,” she began.

She pours another cup of tea for her and Ganyu as she continues, “The reason he was assigned to them was because healers were the first to be killed off.”

“In a war, it makes sense to do such a thing to ensure brute force and violence would hail victory,”

She places the teapot down, “The Conqueror of Demons fell in love with that human.”

Ganyu shows surprise as everything clicks for you. But it doesn't make sense, if they fell in love with that human, why am I having dreams about their time together?

“She died during the war,” Madame Ping tells you gravely.

“Oh.”

“How cruel,” Ganyu whispers.

A new voice joins the discussion, “After the war, he was assigned to Wangshu Inn as his base of operations,”

“Morax-shen!”

He smiles, “I wasn't informed there was a tea party,” he says as he takes a seat.

You say nothing as you watch him sip on the cup.

“Will you tell me now?”

His eyes flit to you, “I suppose it is time,”

…

He feels the pull of the life bond the moment you're out of the radius.

Why? he keeps asking his mind, Why would you leave? Where would you go? Did you leave on your own or were you taken? Why would you leave him again?

He can't find you, he can't sense you, and he's going insane. Xiao warps to the highest point of Wangshu Inn and desperately tries to find you.

He can feel your anguish, the pulsing of your veins, but he can't sense where you are.

Just come back. Please, just come back.

He can hear his heart thrumming in his chest, his throat tightens, and he- he realises this is exactly how he felt when he couldn't find you.

When he couldn't save you.

“Xiao…” the wind carries your voice to him.

Just like last time.

“...Find me where we last departed…”

What?

…

Morax has told you the truth.

What exactly is wrong with Xiao, but that he has no idea how to treat it, only to temper the symptoms.

Who exactly you are to Xiao, how you were that human from half a century ago, how you died during a camp invasion as they were busy fighting off in the North.

How you were made specifically for Xiao. Not only so that you can heal him, but also because you were his lover.

It made sense. A god wanting his warrior a chance to rest. To live the life he was unable to when he wasin the war.

Rex Lapis was a merciful god.

He tells you where you died.

…

Xiao find you in the same river where you died in his arms.

He stares, not knowing what to do.

Was this punishment? Did he really piss his god off that he was given you and you were to be killed again in front off him? In the same place you were taken from him all those years ago?

Instead he hears you hum a song he has not heard of in a long time.

A song he taught to the past you.

Lover's Oath.

He takes one step forward and the water beneath his feet makes a splash.

You turn.

The breath in his lungs disappates.

“Xiao,” you smile, “I'm back,”

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usagi's note: im so happy i might finish editing the last three parts of this later or sometime over the weekend anyway pls tell me what u thought abt it, and as always take care!! o⁠(⁠(⁠*⁠^⁠▽⁠^⁠*⁠)⁠)⁠o PLEASE NOTICE HOW I WROTE THAT U CALLED HIM XIAO INSTEAD OF XIANSHENG.

taglist (open! green can't be tagged): @irenedoesthings @cherrysnows @makuzume @smoochi-modest @bvtterflyyy @original-person @aphxdea @iratempestatis @constellationguy @lloversss @femaholicc

@usagiarchive 2024. do not repost, translate, or use for AI. reblogs, likes, and comments are very appreciated!!

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withleeknow · 1 year ago

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in the dark.

pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, crying, mention of blood, mention of animal abuse, not very edited lol word count: 0.6k note: oh i've had the idea for a scene like this for a whiiiile now and i was hella motivated to finally write it after watching skzflix 😂 (twas supposed to be used for a jk fic but oh well, sorry jungoo)

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation › masterlist › ko-fi

"It was stupid of you."

"Okay."

"And reckless."

"Okay."

"And dangerous."

"Okay."

"And stupid. Did I already mention that? Because it was fucking stupid."

"Oka-"

"Fuck!" you snap. "Why do you keep saying that? Is it the only word in your vocabulary?"

Minho shrugs defeatedly, like none of this matters to him, but his guilty eyes tell you otherwise. He purses his lips for a second, before he tells you, "What else am I supposed to say?"

"Say you're sorry? Say you'll stop doing it? Say you won't put me through this again?"

He stays quiet, and to be honest, you expected him to. He's too stubborn for his own good and he's too good for his own sake. He's got the kindest heart you know, and you will always love him for it, but...

It's hard to make peace with it when he shows up at your doorstep every few weeks with bruises all over, like an abandoned dog asking you to take him in and put him back together.

It's hard to keep track of all the reasons he tells you to justify his borderline foolhardy actions. The last time it happened, it was because he ran into some psycho abusing the stray cats near his neighborhood. Tonight, it was because he saw someone get mugged on the street.

It's even harder to be okay with the fact that he's infinitely selfless and kind because you love your friend.

You love your friend.

You heave a sigh, going back to the task at hand because you know there's no convincing Minho otherwise. Sometimes, you wish he'd think of himself, that he'd put himself over others. Sometimes, you wish he'd think about you.

You asked him about it once, why he kept showing up to yours instead of going to a hospital. Instead of going home.

He only replied, simple and earnest, "I just want to be here with you."

You soak a cotton swab in rubbing alcohol before you press it gently against the cut on his cheek, wincing when he does. Then you move to the cut on the bridge of his nose, the one on his jawline, the one on the corner of his mouth...

You don't meet his eyes, but you feel his steady gaze on you the entire time you tend to his wounds. You're aware of how your hands are shaking, the way every breath you exhale is trembling, and that there are tears ready to overflow any second now.

The first one spills as you work on cleaning the blood off the corner of his mouth.

Then, suddenly, the cotton swab is no longer in your hand. Minho carelessly flings it elsewhere, and before you can scold him for interrupting you, his palms are on your face, delicate fingers cradling your jaw.

You blink. Just a split second, and his lips are on yours.

He's soft, and warm, and sweet, despite the bitterness that's been on your tongue the entire night. You love him. You do.

And he kisses you like he loves you too, tenderly and wholeheartedly.

You want to keep him with you forever, to never let him go, to not have to see him get hurt ever again. You don't think it's possible for you to endure it anymore, now that you know how it feels to have him like this.

When he pulls away, you're dazed. Rightfully so.

Minho doesn't stray from you for too long. He lets you catch your breath before he's leaning in once more.

Another kiss. Three seconds.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles against your lips, his tone so painfully sincere.

Another kiss. Four seconds.

"I'll stop doing it."

Then another one. Five seconds.

"I won't put you through this again."

#stray kids fic #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #skz fic #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz x you #lee know fluff #lee know angst #lee know scenarios #lee know x reader #lee know imagines #lee know x you #lee minho x reader #lee minho x you #stray kids #skz #lee know #lee minho

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omghallucinations · 5 months ago

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Bang Chan Chart Analysis: in the weeds edition

chart patterns, degrees, fixed stars, aspects, final dispositors, basically all kind of deeper cuts.

ah, bang chan: a double libra gemini rising whose other planets are acting up so much i barely even touched on venus and mercury somehow

like he's clearly an air sign in every respect--he loooOOOves to talk, he's curious and interested in a lot of different things, he's never met a secret he doesn't want to immediately tell five hundred thousand people on live... but damn some of those other planets (saturn, mars, jupiter, uranus) are loud.

right away i noticed his chart is a bucket chart--every planet is in one half of the circle, except for one planet who becomes the "handle": his aries saturn. saturn is hammering all the other planets on the head so to speak.

saturn: you'll have to come through me motherfuckers

saturn is screaming it's ME i'm the BIG BOSS and as the handle, a lot of things in chan's life are gonna be based on or deal with--for better or worse--saturn stuff (maturation, fear, control, authority, judgment). chan's saturn automatically rockets to the top of his Big Boss list (it will not stay here tho, we've got some other bosses coming).

saturn is in its fall in aries--it doesn't speak the language there. any planet in its fall is usually marked down in influence but i also think it makes the planet more important? chan has to struggle with it. a saturn at home in capricorn (barring other chart factors) is very natural. 8/9 members of girls generation have saturn in capricorn and wow does that make sense. saturn in capricorn prizes Work and is self-conscious/guilty of its feelings (feelings are not productive), it's alllways anxious it hasn't done enough, it is very scared of disappointing people, it's deeply conscious of societal conditioning.

aries is a weird sign for saturn to be in. saturn has a lot of fear, and aries has a lot of fearlessness. aries is a baby and saturn is all about maturation. aries is about acting without thinking, saturn is about making a list and checking it 5 times then deciding not to do it just in case.

and then. this is fun. saturn goes on the big boss list again because it is unaspected--this doesn't mean there aren't aspects, it means there are no major aspects to other planets. when a planet is unaspected, everyone around you can sure as fuck see the hell out of it, but you can't really. it's center stage but not in the play.

bang chan: i am the cutest, fuzziest lil libra guy :) i just care about my work which is normal :) and i express that care in a very reasonable and chill way :) i just want things to be good! :) everyone around him, shaking in fear from his scathing judgment and innate leadership aura: uh-huh

an unaspected planet is usually a generational thing--chan really popped up like hey girl :) i'm here to really personify our family problems of work, judgement, fear and maturation and just like. make 'em huge and unavoidable. haha. :)

chan's gonna show real extremes of behavior around his saturn, which

in aries seems like it's dealing with issues of creation, self-determination, doing it on my own, that kind of stuff (so he'll deny himself or assert himself too much in turns)

in the 11th house backs that up--the 11th is the aquarius house, so saturn is in aries (a "me" sign) in a "we" (in a sort of detached intellectual sense) house

11th/aquarius usually wants to set u free :) but in a kind of back-handed passy aggy harry styles way, like "i love you so i'll set you free, because i am such an open-minded person, unlike other people (who are tethered to humanity which is both embarrassing and scary to me yuck), also setting you free is less terrifying to me than being perceived :) go with god :) bye :)"

it's in the sun decan, so there's a flavor of "look at me look at me" and identity formation (am i what i produce?)

saturn's most exact aspect is sesquisquare mars which acts a lot like a square, my favorite aspect! squares get such a bad rap but i think they're so much better for your life in the long run bc they force you to deal with things. his mars is in sagittarius, so we have a double fire sign situation: explosive, passionate, loves attention and creation. mars, who also gets a bad rap, is our survival planet. it's like, how are you gonna survive this. how are you gonna get what you want and defend yourself and win (if you care about winning) (chan cares about winning).

sagittarius mars is gonna go forward kind of joyfully but also in a "fuck you lmao" way. it's courageous bc it doesn't really think anything could go actually wrong. it's gonna Leave if it's bored (and it's already bored). it's gonna wide-angle zoom on the situation and be like "lol embarrassing... for you" and feel 100% sure it's right All The Time. sesquisquare saturn tries to control this force, adds a bunch of fear and repression and Issues (and often in later life, wisdom), so -> chan's gonna really be afraid of his own anger, of losing control of his temper -> ironically he will be unable to stop bouncing between these two extremes to various degrees. u can't control what u can't accept my dude. -> he's also afraid of not being in power, of not winning -> the me/we extreme will also come into play--especially with his sun and moon in libra (that's their whole Thing) sagittarius says "i'm right for objective, philosophical reasons" and aries says "i'm right because i just am bro i don't have to explain myself to you" mars in the 6th house--that drive to assert himself is gonna really go hard at work and in his daily life. this is a #gymbro placement for sure. his daily routine is Let's Fuckin Go At 150% -> his 11th house (where saturn is), loves the idea of people, community, his ideals, is detached from humanity and it comes into conflict with -> his 6th house, which is very much of the world, very critical, very let's get actual shit done and be of service to people sidebar, mars is exactly conjunct the asteroid quaoar-- creation, making new rules and structures, diverging from how things Have Always Been Done, please hold this thought for his uranus, coming up soon

libra moon at 29 degrees: heard u were desperately trying to maintain equilibrium for emotional security reasons lol

another planet i'm eyeing is his libra moon which is in the anaretic degree, 29. he's very good at this energy but it's gonna test him. with his libra moon he needs contact and dialogue with people to feel secure but it can't get too deep because that's gonna freak him out. he is super comfortable being vulnerable and emotional on the internet because the internet is not real. i mean it's real, but it doesn't feel real. it's the equivalent of over-intellecualising your feelings so you don't actually feel anything (which an air moon always enjoys, as a hobby). just like it's way easier and less scary to be in love with an idea of a person, rather than the actual person! the actual person can really fuck up ur moodboard!

chan needs things to be pretty, equal, even-keeled. libra is such a funny sign because often it gets flattened to this like "cutey pie flirt" stereotype which i would say is almost exclusively libra venus. libra is a cardinal sign--an acting, initiating sign--and can be a lot more controlling than it likes to pretend imo. it's also in his sixth house--he's gonna feel safe when he can be of service to others, when he can get things done, when he can edit shit, basically.

he's also a new moon baby, which gives a moon a fun, aries-y, baby-tries-(food)-for-the-first-time vibe. removes a lot of those libra inhibitions and adds a lot of need to feel special.

chan is so good at making sure he feels safe by trying to keep everything cute and not too deep and staying on the surface or removed from the situation through constant activity and like, pruning everything, trying to perfect everything (therefore not having to actually deal with anything). howmstever, this system is gonna repeatedly implode throughout his life. soz bud. his emotional foundation's gonna get pummeled on and off which sucks because he has an almost manic need

for emotional safety through strategic diplomacy and avoiding confrontation

for emotional safety through constant work and "perfecting" everything

for people to like him everyone needs to like him or he will die

(not the real him, that makes him nervous, the projection of him that he painstakingly curates, that is safer)

it's not especially fun to deal with.

bright side, wisdom in later life!

mercury, ruler of chan's ascendant: pretty much exactly what you'd expect?

as a gemini rising, chan's ruler is his mercury in libra in the 5th but ironically i don't feel like she's as major of a player as some of these other planets. you can see the communication and curiosity focus of his life, and in the 5th house of self-expression, creation. mercury is sextile mars and pluto, a talent for making his voice heard and powerful, trine uranus in the 9th he's confident about and believes in his unique voice/perspective.

like mercury is there and she's important, but she's not like. causing big waves? it's like his life direction, again, important, but i'm more intrigued by...

mars conjunct pluto opposite his ascendant: oh boy!

this is his one big opposition and it's on the gemini-sagittarius axis (my fave, she's just fun and curious, she's not super dramatic or that difficult although she doesn't exactly make it easy to make... decisions... or get anything done?). however if we were worried about getting shit done, mars and pluto are here to scream. mars conjunct pluto is exactly as dramatic as sagittarius-gemini is not.

this is an exact conjunction and it's wild. anything pluto touches blows up in a way. it makes it intense and secretive and adds the planet to its portfolio of unconscious past life soul security demands.

lmao i just realized that red lights is fully this conjunction lmao oh no. i don't know if i can talk about this conjunction normally. it's very... ... nsfw.

sometimes pluto conjunct mars forces mars into the background and makes the person afraid to assert themselves, but i don't think that's exactly the vibe here, although it's similar. it looks to me like chan has a lot of rage and anger in him that, with his libra placements, he probably has a very difficult time acknowledging or facing. he'll easily internalize it and turn it inward and be a real asshole to himself, and also his temper will flare up randomly and he'll go for the kill shot when he meant to communicate like a normal person. he has a lot of strong desires, he also wants power, but he's gonna hide it and run from the reality there. he does have almost inhuman will, courage and drive tho, he can truly endure anything.

(idk i think he should be a little worried about his physical body, so many of his coping mechanisms depend on exercise/endurance and with pluto--transformation, security--in the sixth house i worry his health might force transformation? ur body can't carry all of ur unspoken shit my bud?)

gemini rising wants to seem very fun, very friendly, very cute, but with mars and pluto on his descendant chan is almost hiding or ignoring a huge part of himself--all those darker impulses which aren't going anywhere. my guy loves a taboo and (redacted redacted redacted redacted REDACTEDDDD). whatever, it's good for creativity and in sagittarius he has a good sense of humor about it.

jupiter: uno reverso???

damn chan really got #blessed here, a lot of that chart was really screaming Issues, Internalized Rage, Fear, Depression, etc, but jupiter really bounced up to be like "never mind haha. i mean yeah, true, but also whatever"

first of all jupiter is in its home house, the 9th--chan's on a Journey, he's eat pray loving, he's Listening and Learning--and it's in aquarius, so that belief system and personal philosophy is gonna be very open-minded, very science fiction, very predicting trends, very ahead of society.

jupiter conjunct his MC: this is what pulls jupiter up to the big boss list. anything conjunct your MC is at the top of your chart--people see it. people notice it about you. and goddamn are people just gonna give him stuff. and they always have. no wonder jyp was like This Is My Special Boy, like that is jupiter conjunct MC to a t.

(the public perception of chan is also gonna be a lot... cuter and more exuberant and fun than the actual man. not that he's not those things. just that the jupiter of his personality is really what people are noticing about him from the outside: his personal vision, his expansive side, all that. they are not looking at that prominent saturn as much, even if saturn is a bigger player)

jupiter trine the sun: another one where people are just gonna like you. for one thing they'll notice chan's good intentions and generosity--altho they will also notice his tendency to moralise and be a liiiiittle condescending--but his tendency towards bouncy optimism (at least outwardly) makes people want to follow him aquarius jupiter trine libra sun: two "we" signs in a big way, except aquarius is "we" like "humanity" and libra is "we" like "you and me", but they unite in a tendency to conflate the personal identity with the group identity--with jupiter and the sun at play it's like chan is able to bring people on board with his identity and personal vision (but he often presents an idealised version of himself who does not have needs, somehow) 9th house trine 5th house: basically a repeat of jupiter-sun, since the 5th house is the leo house--chan has a talent for using his personal philosophy/vision in creative works

our final big boss of the night, perhaps the ultimate big boss: aquarius uranus

chan's aquarius uranus is really talking to everybody. it has by far the most aspects of any planet. uranus has its hand in his ascendant and every planet except jupiter and neptune. with modern rulers aquarius is at home in uranus, and i'm coming around a little bit on modern rulership even if i think it tends to be less prominent than traditional. still:

aquarius uranus: original thought, technological progress, your box is dumb i'm not going in there uranus in the 9th house: he's gonna have an offbeat belief system--no chance he buys into korea's societal norms, or anyone's societal norms for that matter. he's not a conformist. trine his gemini ascendant: whooooo boy he is really not a conformist. when he's not in a Mood he's not judgmental at all, even when he's in a mood he has a real benevolent Ah, Humanity Should All Be Free to Pursue Happiness vibe. gemini couldn't give a shit about morals, and uranus and aquarius think morals are bourgeois. he has a talent for his own difference--some uranus people (like most of ateez, my weirdo darlings) have chips on their shoulders about being different, but chan with his easy trine is just happy to be himself. i mean a trine uranus isn't gonna change the world (unlike harder aspects like squares, who would be more driven to do so) but he is gonna set a good example just through his identity.

this is a fun side of chan! i like this!

square moon: mmmm ok about that chip on his shoulder. although it's not really about being different--it's more about he both wants to be stable and emotionally secure and also free and independent and he's soooooooo fucking stubborn (but he doesn't see it that way because he's Right, not stubborn). he's prone to feeling really itchy and stuck and then making big changes out of nowhere. also he's very intuitive but overly sensitive and when he's hurt he's gonna shut down completely and not tell the person what they did wrong. didn't he give someone the silent treatment? jisung? yeah that's uranus square moon energy. he has a lot of fear around his emotions and only lets himself feel in short sharp bursts. he feels hurt and he cuts out the person immediately without warning to protect himself--even if it's completely illogical he will dupe himself into believing it is very logical and correct, actually libra moon square aquarius uranus: yeah this looks like a "keep the peace even if it is unhealthy" v. "radical change out of nowhere the tower ass" argument, he'll bounce between the two extremes again. heyyy gemini rising i didn't even see u there!!

man. really haven't gotten into everything including his sun in libra (in its fall), his nodes (classic idol 5th-11th axis, soooo many of them have this), etc, but i've been working on this for so long!! aughhH!!

ok drumroll please, let's gather up his chart big players!! normally i would rank these, but i keep changing my mind.

aquarius uranus

aquarius jupiter

sagittarius mars-pluto conjunction

aries saturn

libra mercury (2nd to lastish)

libra moon (definitely last on this list)

tentatively i'm gonna put uranus-jupiter tied at 1, then mars-pluto then saturn then mercury. ugh i don't know though. they're all big players! chan in general has one of those spread-out charts--when you look at the ruler of each planet, he has what's called a "committee" tree

where there isn't one or two final bosses, and the planets are all connected in one tree rather than being separate. you can see how chan's 3 top planets are sag mars, aquarius jupiter and aries saturn--they all work together and are super interconnected. he's not as single-minded as someone with a singular dispositor (ateez hongjoong has a singular final dispositor tree with his pisces jupiter) but also not as split or conflicted as someone who has split trees (ateez seonghwa has a planet in rulership tree with separate parts).

anyway this has been really interesting! for someone with what seems at first glance to be a very unified chart (air moon, air sun, air rising) he has some interesting conflicting energies--altho i'm sure he sees himself as just an air person. i'm sure he is lowkey aware of that mars and pluto conjunction but i'd bet he really pretends he does not see it (except for in REDACTED REDACTED EXTREMELY REDACTED situations), and he truly cannot see his saturn at all (altho everyone else can!).

#bang chan astrology #stray kids astrology #kpop astrology

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within-your-eyes-if · 9 months ago

Text

May 1st Progress Update

Hello all!

Very long update, so I apologize ahead of time.

April has been an incredibly productive month for me. I've made substantial revisions and have taken some time to reflect on possible changes for the future.

There are decisions I made earlier in the development of this story that, in hindsight, could have been handled better. While I will continue with the upcoming update as planned, I intend to take additional time afterward to revisit and refine various aspects of the game.

I truly love this story and want it to be the best it can be. I aim to look back on it with pride and minimal regrets. These changes will be comprehensive, affecting everything from narrative elements and gameplay mechanics to the presentation on itch.io.

I hope this update doesn't cause any concern; rather, I want to share this as part of my journey in developing this game, a process that occasionally requires stepping back and reassessing to move forward effectively.

With that said, here are some developments I've been working on that I haven't yet discussed. If you have any thoughts on some of these, I'd welcome the insight:

Guilt System Overhaul: I'm currently refining the code for the guilt system. The upcoming changes will significantly alter how guilt is calculated and displayed, emphasizing the impact of your relationships. For instance, lying to a character you're romancing will carry more weight. However, I'm carefully considering how to balance this to respect player agency, recognizing that not everyone may want their character to feel guilty in such situations. Your feedback on this would be appreciated before I start making final decisions — edit: you are welcome to comment on this post! (Sorry ;-;)

Skill System Overhaul: The foundation for the new skill system is done and functional in a test environment. However, I'm still evaluating whether its inclusion genuinely enhances gameplay or if it complicates things unnecessarily.

Extensive Coding Overhauls: Overall, I've done so much coding that I couldn't begin to tell you what all I've done. I combined things to both organize and streamline (though this might just effect me overall).

There is more to share, but I want to keep some surprises under wraps for now.

Future Support Update: I am in the process of setting up a Patreon, which I aim to launch next month. Initially, I considered using Ko-Fi for all supporter interactions, but the exclusive access features offered by itch.io make Patreon a better fit for what I want to achieve.

On Patreon, I will be providing a couple tiers. While one offers more than the other, here's a general overview of what I'll be offering: detailed progress updates, sneak peeks, alpha builds, special acknowledgments, early access, among others.

Ko-Fi will remain available for those who prefer to offer one-time support. Your support, whether recurring or one-time, is immensely appreciated and makes a significant difference in the continued development of my projects.

Beta Testing: Given the aspects of Patreon, how I approach beta testing in the future will be different. However, I will continue as I did last time with this one.

This month, I am aiming to begin the beta testing phase for the new Vice System. In light of changes to the test's parameters, previous applications have been cleared. If you're interested in participating, please reapply.

Please note, this test covers a lot of adult content — you must be 18 or older to participate (though really, you should be 18+ if you're even reading my story *finger wagging*). Ensure you are comfortable with explicit content before applying.

Application is found here.

Tumblr Asks: I will be making a separate post soon to address the reopening of Asks. Please be patient with me as I work through a couple of reasons why it was temporarily disabled. I appreciate your understanding and look forward to hearing more from all of you soon!

Closing Thoughts: Sorry again for the lengthy update, but thank you all for your patience as I continue refining and revising. Work on Chapter 3: Part Two is progressing, though there's still more to be done.

Wishing you all a wonderful month ahead!

#within your eyes if #wye progress update #wye general information #interactive fiction #work in progress #progress update #text based game

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thydungeongal · 4 months ago

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Okay, so we know that Gygax was a misogynist and fascist. I read the forum posts with the infamous "nits make lice", and yes, it's a description of in-universe attitude, but he then went on a pretty fash rant about an eye for an eye being just and pacifism being "slave morality", so I don't see reason in figuring out his specific kind of bigotry.

Arneson was also a fascist. Guy who wrote Tekumel was so as well.

Were any of founders of hobby not racists and misogynists? Tunnels and Trolls looks promising, because there is a woman who was always a player but is credited in all editions for her contributions, so I hope misogyny is not foundational of hobby, even for generic fantasy games. But also one of spells sounds as a very bad taste racist joke (mind control spell was called "yassa massa" until 5th edition included), and I remember that in his space rpg from 1976 there was an illustration that was a very bad taste caricature of Israel-Palestine conflict (spaceship with crew dressed in stereotypical Arab clothing is being chased by ship in the shape of Star of David, I don't remember what did speech bubble say).

But what about the rest? Do you know how normal were contents of early editions of RuneQuest and other games that are considered foundational? Classic Traveller looks fine, but only because it doesn't feature any topics where racism or misogyny could be obvious, so I am not sure. Was there like, a sensible amount of women early in the hobby? I know there were some from reading old ass magazines that occasionally published materials written by women. But do you know more about it?

Not gonna lie, this is just me feeling guilty and bad because of one article that takes a pretty gender essentialist outlook on everything, but thinking that I enjoy something "fundamentally male" is Not Nice, girl

First edition RuneQuest is refreshingly lacking in a lot of the casual racism and misogyny of its time, and Greg Stafford was genuinely interested in culture and mythology. It's not perfect by any means but I think RuneQuest does treat the cultures he takes influence from with a lot of respect.

Traveller is funny because first edition Traveller has a whole bit about "we default to using he/him pronouns for characters but that does not mean that they have to be men, by Jove!" which is a huge dub for the he/him lesbians.

As for whether there were a lot of women in the early days of the hobby, I don't know. But I know that Iron Crown Enterprises (creators of Rolemaster) had at least some women in their employ, some of them credited as playtesters (in addition to the charmingly eighties attribution of "and various other young dudes and dudettes).

But ultimately, screw Gygax and his gender essentialist ideas. There have been lots of women in the space since its inception and while the roots of the hobby may have been male-dominated the very fact that so many women have flocked into RPGs is all the evidence you need that this is not a hobby that necessitates a male brain whatever the fuck that means. Gygax may have managed to catch lightning in a bottle with D&D but that doesn't mean we have to give him the final word on everything RPG-related forever. Also because he said a lot of other really dumb shit besides the "RPGs are for the male brain," so like he wasn't the esoteric genius people sometimes try to paint him as.

#thydungeongal answers

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fanby-fckry · 10 months ago

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You know what, I’m just gonna say it. I think that Alastor being aroace is part of the reason he’s so shippable to me.

Before you come at me, check the flag in my pfp; I’m aroace-spec.

Maybe it’s me projecting, maybe it’s because I love exploring relationships through an aroace lens, but goddamn. I ship him more than any other character and every time I do, his aroaceness is a major component in the ship.

Examples below the cut because it’s gonna get long:

📻🍎 || RadioApple:

There are so many versions of this dynamic and I am here for all of them.

We have the pre-canon kinky QPR that I show in UH3. I could talk about that all day, but to summarize:

Aroace x genuinely respectful allo is a dynamic that heals my soul.

Lucifer is less tied down by human constructs like amatonormativity, having never been human himself.

The Devil values consent.

Kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky ca- *I am removed from the stage with a comically large hook*

Then we have the Evil and fucked up QPR dynamic:

And of course, trying to get along for Charlie’s sake and eventually bonding over their shared love of dad jokes and musical theatre, both being violinists (yup, Alastor plays violin too, check the wiki) with niche hobbies/interests (ducks, furby organ) and accidentally winding up in a loving, healthy QPR.

📻🕸️ || RadioDust:

There’s something about an aroace and a sex worker who very rarely falls in love.

Angel would know that Alastor isn’t with him for sex, would know that he values Angel beyond his body.

With greyro Alastor, Angel and Alastor would both be inexperienced with romance, but in wildly different ways. Angel has never had a healthy romantic relationship and therefor tries not to fall in love. Greyro Alastor has probably experienced romantic attraction like less than three times in his 100+ years of existence.

And if Alastor never gains romantic attraction for Angel, that’s a whole other level to the dynamic.

It’s got some great angst potential with Angel wondering if he’s not good enough to love romantically or Alastor feeling guilty or confused as to Why It Hasn’t Happened Yet when he cares for Angel so deeply, and eventually it gets resolved with the two of them accepting that their attractions don’t have to match up for them to love/appreciate/care for each other and they smash the amatonormative relationship hierarchy as queer platonic partners.

Or, Angel’s just totally cool with it from the start because he’s spent decades in the kink scene and has potentially been exposed to more relationship anarchy than Alastor.

Kink and queerness have a great deal of historical and cultural overlap, and that includes aroace queerness. Because Angel’s had way more canon exposure to both, it’s possible he knows more about Alastor’s orientation than Alastor does, and I love the idea of Angel introducing him to terms or just being super chill about not labeling things.

📻♥️ || RadioHusk:

Drawing like 90% from pilot dynamic and headcanon on this. They’re just two old men. They get drunk and cuddle. Alastor is one of the few people who knows Husk can purr and takes advantage of this fact. Alastor considers Husk a friend in a fucked up, possessive way. Husk considers Alastor a pain in the ass, but does care about him on some level.

It’s Fucked Up and Evil QPR: Remix Edition.

And the versions where the author puts them through fanfic couple’s therapy and actually gets them into a healthy point in their relationship? One where Alastor no longer owns Husk’s Soul? *chef’s kiss*

📻🌹 || RadioRose:

For me, personally, this is an exclusively nonsexual, non-romantic ship. They’re besties; they’re QPPs. They’re married for the tax benefits and so that they cannot be forced to testify against each other in court.

Rosie knew Alastor was aroace before he did and rather than sit down and explain it to him, she decided to make ace puns.

📻🖤 || RadioSiren: [edit, context here] RadioFemme

Ok, so this is entirely based on non-canon-compliant Lilith. Or, I guess, non-series-compliant Lilith. More of the old WOG stuff from the pilot era, with a healthy dose of headcanon for flavor.

I love the idea of Lilith and Lucifer having an open marriage; I love the UH3 style polycule dynamic.

Lilith being the original seductress and Alastor being aesthetically but not sexually or romantically attracted to her is very near and dear to my heart.

I’m an aroace with a voice kink who is aesthetically attracted to Lilith and I think Alastor is an aroace with a voice kink who would be aesthetically attracted to Lilith, ok?

📻📺 || RadioStatic:

I’m gonna be real with you, 90% of my interest in RadioStatic is in the one-sided version where Vox is a pathetic little incel simp and Alastor is either oblivious, mildly annoyed, or finds the whole thing hilarious.

Whenever there’s any reciprocation on Alastor’s part, I always imagine it being in a very aroace, very Alastor-esque way. He needs to be get something out of it completely unrelated to sex/romance. And he needs to be manipulative and sadistic in the process.

Whether that something is kink-related, a business transaction, or simply the quality entertainment provided by Vox being a cringefail TV-headed little bitch, I love to see it.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #radioapple #radiodust #radiohusk #radiorose #radiofemme #radiostatic #onewaybroadcast #fanby’s fuckery #osha violation #suggestive

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builtbybrokenbells · 1 year ago

Text

Guilty Pleasures

Due to a strong foundation of trust and a willingness to share, a situation which would normally be catastrophic, seems to turn out to be quite rewarding.

Pairing: danny wagner x f!reader, jake kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 20.4k (i am so sorry)

Warnings: SMUT 18+, threesome, unprotected/protected sex, rough sex, anal sex, double penetration, oral (f!receiving), oral (m!receiving), face fucking, fingering (f!receiving), dirty talk (lots and lots of dirty talk), choking, biting, name calling, praise, slight impact play, daddy kink, dom/sub, voyeurism, degradation, jealousy, mentions of cheating/thoughts of infidelity, arguing, asshole/shit disturber Jake, angst, fluff, sorry if i miss any!

this is pretty much pure porn. plot at the beginning, but mostly just sex. took a break from gdw for a little while just to straighten my thoughts with it, and came up with this idea and could not stop myself from writing it. it’s super long and very lightly edited, so I do apologize for that. please don’t judge me too hard for this one 😭 as always, be kind, enjoy, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes!

also! italics are the memories/past, everything else is present! thought I’d try something new this time 😁

The chime of the bell above the door signalled the entry of the newest patron of the bar. Normally, you would have eagerly greeted whoever walked in, but tonight, you were caught up in the chaos of the already crowded room. Dollar bills were waving in front of your face, hands raised in the air to catch your attention, and the occasional shout from an impatient customer filled the already loud atmosphere. Beer bottles were flying across the sticky wooden countertop in exchange for cash. Margarita and shot glasses were lined before you, only empty for a moment before they were shoved in the proper direction, too. You were working faster than you could comprehend, barely hanging on but surviving from the thought of your coworkers starting shift in a few minutes.

You took the early shift, thinking that you could breeze through the night with minimal stress and effort. For the most part, you were correct in thinking so. Unfortunately, when the clock struck eight, the city’s nightlife took a dramatic turn. As a result, the bar was quickly overrun with guests desperate for a buzz. Some were understanding, kindness oozing from them as long as they had a drink in their hand. Others were not, but you couldn’t blame them. There were far too many people in the bar for only a single bartender, and that wasn’t really a management issue, either. You were an establishment that was plagued with long time regulars and middle aged men in search of companionship. Every now and then a group of older women would check the place out, but rarely anyone under 30. So, you were confident in saying that it was unusual for you to house so many people in a single night, let alone all at once.

You rushed through your last few customers, serving everyone who had been waiting in hopes that they would still be generous enough to leave a tip. For the most part they were, and for that you were thankful. When the last person retreated, happily sipping on their beverage of choice, you took a moment to breathe. With both hands planted on the countertop and your head towards the floor, you took a much needed minute of rest. When a body presented itself in front of you once more, you thought you might shed a tear just at the thought of fixing another drink. “What are you drinking tonight?” You asked, aiming to sound as cheery as possible.

“You don’t know by now?” At the sound of the familiar tone, your head snapped up in surprise. “I’d be lying if I said that doesn’t hurt.”

“Shut up,” you landed a playful smack on his arm, your first genuine smile of the night fighting its way on to your lips. “Of course I do.” The words fell from your lips as you reached under the counter for a glass. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, the sound ringing nicely to his ears. You turned, grabbing a whiskey bottle from the top shelf, wasting no time pouring a double shot over the cubes. “Top shelf whiskey, always. Doesn’t matter the price, as long as that’s where it’s from and it’s a double.” You smirked, turning to place the bottle back in its place. “Three or four ice cubes. Not enough to water it down, but enough to keep it cold.” You continued, reaching for a citrus peel neatly arranged into a spiral from a plastic container beside the glasses. “And something to make it look pretty, as long as it doesn’t change the taste.” You arranged it neatly on the rim with a hint of cockiness seeping through your pores. “And served with a smile, because that’s what makes it taste the best.” You placed it in front of him, paired with the sweetest smile your cheeks could adorn and a soft wink.

“You really do know me, trouble.” He picked up the glass, swirling it around so the ice could cool the liquid. “I’m sorry I ever doubted you.”

“You should be, Jacob. I wouldn’t be a very good bartender if I forgot my favourite customers’ order.” He took a small sip, fighting the urge to dish out another compliment. He knew better, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t tempted.

“Busy spot tonight,” he noted, looking around at the bustling room. The booths and tables were so full that people had taken to standing by the walls, content with being seatless and lost in chatter with each other. “Suppose you actually had to work, not just sit here and look pretty.”

“Nothing wrong with doing both.” You reminded. “Although I don’t think you’d know too much about the working class.”

“Right,” he chuckled, taking a seat on one of the stools. “But I do know a thing or two about looking pretty.” You gave him a shrug, not willing to play into his ego.

“Where’s the rest of your company tonight?” You changed topics, careful not to tread too deeply. “Not like you to stag it.”

“On their way. I’d give them about ten minutes, then I’ll worry.” He assured you. “Maybe I just wanted you all to myself for a night.” He posed the theory as if he had never divulged in the glory of seclusion with you. You ignored him, unwilling to admit that you didn’t mind him on his lonesome.

“What can I get for you, darlin’?” You asked, barely looking up from your hands.

“Whiskey, top shelf. You can pick.” The voice rang through you as if it was blessed with the grace of god himself, settling in your chest and warming your soul. You finally broke your focus from your lime cutting, curious to see if the face matched the beauty of the voice. As if it were some kind of sick joke, the sight of his face seemed even more heavenly than the sweet tone of his words. “Only a couple ice cubes, though. Don’t want to water it down too much.”

“Top shelf?” You asked for clarification. Normally, nobody even eyed the liquor that far up in fear that it would break the bank.

“Price doesn’t matter, sweetheart. Quality does.” As beautiful as he was, he did seem a tad cocky. You supposed you could brush it to the side unless it became a real problem. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, turning to the wall of liquor to pick his poison. You used the step stool to reach for a bottle on the far left. You brought it down with caution, returning to him with a raised eyebrow. He glanced at the label and gave a nod of approval.

“Single?”

“Always a double.” You could hear a smile hidden in his tone. You poured the whiskey over the ice, the crackle striking him with curiosity. “Ice usually goes in last, does it not?”

“Been doing this a long time,” you chuckled “tastes better this way.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” He hummed. As you turned to place the bottle back in its original place, you could feel his eyes burning into you. When you turned back to him, your suspicion was confirmed. He seemed shameless about his unwavering stare. “Got anything to make it look pretty?” You let out a sigh, pondering what you could add to it. You pulled out a citrus twist, showing it to him. “Will it change the way it tastes?” He smirked.

“Unless you’re planning on eating it, no.” You teased, garnishing the rim with it. “Probably wouldn’t be very pleasant if you did.” You passed it to him, smiling at the peculiar interaction.

“That smile will make it taste even better, though.” He noted, eyes still glued to you. “What’s your name, sweetheart?”

“Y/n,” you said, feeling a hint of a blush plaster your cheeks. “What about you? Never seen you around here before.”

“Sweetheart suits you better.” He noted. “I’m Jake.” He replied, taking a sip of the beverage. He gave a nod of approval paired with a little smile, one that stole the air straight from your lungs. “Just moved here, thought I’d check the place out.”

“Satisfied so far?” You weren’t shy in admitting your question was laced with filthy undertones. You were certain you would let him take you right then and there with no guilt at all. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and his interest in you was very apparent.

“Incredibly,” he let out a small laugh. “What about you, trouble?”

“What about me?” You shot back, thankful that the bar was nearly empty. You thought it would be worse than torture, having to cut your conversation with him short.

“Are you satisfied, sweetheart?”

Jake was the devil in disguise, and that you were certain of. His charm was like no other, but his intentions were his downfall. He would do anything for a night of fun, but that’s where his involvement ended. He was quick with a joke, always trying for a laugh. Compliments were steadily flowing, and his gaze was always the same; attempting to undress you with his eyes alone. You were sure Jake could make a great friend if you allowed him to get that close, but it was much too risky for you to entertain. You had fallen victim to him once, and had never fully recovered. To step in time with him was assurance of certain death, and that was something you could never forget. Although beautiful, his love was not something desirable. Despite knowing that, you seemed desperate to convince yourself of the fact every time you were near him.

“Aren’t you always trying to get me alone?” You chuckled, hearing the door chime once more.

“Always trying, never succeeding.” He shrugged, taking a long drink from his cup. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“I wonder why that is, Jacob.” You rolled your eyes. The conversation came to a halt as soon as the words left your mouth. Danny, Josh and Sam had joined you two at the bar, taking a seat beside their brother while still amidst their own conversation.

“I wonder, too.” Jake said, always needing to get the last word in. You clenched your jaw, already finding yourself annoyed with him despite only being in his company for a short time.

“That’s it, beautiful. Just like that.” His desperation was evident, heavy breathing sounding through the room and staining the walls with sin. It was a sin you would never be able to forgive yourself for, one that was made in a moment of weakness and left an air of suffering in its wake. “Does that feel good?” His fingers were knotted in your hair, laced around the strands like a snake settling in for a kill. No verbal response could compare to the vulgarity of your moans. “Tell me how good it feels, baby.”

You broke your stare from his face, feeling a wave of indignation washing over you at the vile memory. It was something that plagued you, seeming to poison every pleasant thought and ruin it indefinitely. To him, it seemed like a typical Sunday afternoon activity. Jake was always dripping with sex appeal, and sex was his favourite pastime. It was a horrendous pairing of traits. He had no remorse for his actions, none at all for making you fall for him and then disappearing as if he never existed at all. You were a one night stand, and he left your apartment that night with no intent of ever speaking to you again. You were a fool for him, in love by the first touch, and you were nothing more than a conquest to him, a challenge with little significance, and you were one he proved so easily forgettable.

You never wanted to see him again, almost happy he had vanished after the initial shock wore off. You vowed if you were to see him again, you wouldn’t even cast a glance in his direction. You did well; the first few times he came back around the bar you barely even acknowledged his existence. That struck a nerve in him you didn’t even realize he could have. Emotion was very low on Jake’s list of priorities, but you seemed to invoke every single one in him. It bothered him so much that he refused to return to the bar you worked at for many months in fear of facing rejection again. He avoided you just long enough for you to meet a fantastic person, one who seemed very willing to give you the love you were looking for. One that found himself sitting in the same bar seat Jake had once sat, staring just as longingly at you as Jake did. This time, the patron was in it for more than a hookup, and had fallen for you far beyond anything Jake could ever comprehend feeling.

It was fantastic; a dream come true, even. Someone who loved in the same way you did, adorned the same outlook on life, and had the same morals and passions. It was so fantastic that it seemed too good to be true. “Hey, beautiful.” Danny leaned over the counter, placing a kiss to your cheek as you sat a beer bottle in front of him. “I missed you.”

Correction: it was too good to be true.

“I missed you.” You smiled, eyes fluttering closed at the feeling.

“Ten more minutes and you can join us on the other side.” Sam joked, eyeing the clock.

“Oh, I know. I’ve been counting the seconds.”

Jake had done such a good job at disappearing that he had dug his own grave. Instead of mustering the courage to confront you, to apologize and make amends for his actions, he gave you ample opportunity to fall in love with his best friend. As if it was some type of sick joke, a repercussion for the sins you committed with him, you had no idea that they were so close until it was far too late. You were already falling fast for the curly haired boy who appeared to be the exact opposite of Jake Kiszka. You were so desperate to purge Jake from your life that you failed to realize Danny was a sure way to allow him right back in.

“My friends are gonna join me, tonight. Is that okay?” Danny was nervous, that much was obvious. But, he was cute when he was nervous, and you couldn’t imagine why meeting his friends would cause any kind of problem.

“F’course it is, handsome.” You smiled, handing a bottle to him after ridding it if the cap. “You know, draft would be much cheaper. And better for the environment.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he smiled, finding it impossible to stop admiring you. “They can be a lot, sometimes. I just don’t want them to scare you away.” He chuckled.

“I like you, Daniel. I’m dating you because I like you, not because of your friends. Besides, crazy never really bothered me much. I work at a bar, so I’m sure I’ve met worse.” He laughed, nodding along to your words.

“Suppose I can’t argue that.” He agreed. “If you like them, we can properly hang out sometime. I just thought that if you didn’t, you could pretend to be busy with something else.”

“Thoughtful, but not necessary. I’m sure I’ll love them.” You leaned over and placed a kiss to his cheek. “You worry too much.”

“I like you, what can I say?” He smiled, appreciative of your attitude. “Plus, they keep pestering me about coming here all the time. Figured I couldn’t keep you a secret much longer.”

“Oh, so I’m a secret?” You teased, sending him a wink.

“Not like that,” he rolled his eyes, but he was laughing as he did so. “If I could, I’d keep you all to myself for the rest of my life. What if you like one of them more than me?”

“Impossible.” You assured him, sending look of finality to show him you were serious. “I’m going to clean off the booths, give me a shout when they get here, okay?”

“For a kiss,” he smirked.

“That just comes with the service.” You giggled, leaning forward and capturing him in a moment of sweetness. “That better not count as my tip.” You joked as you pulled away.

“I’ll give that to you after work.” He assured you as you shuffled out from behind the counter.

“I’m counting on it!” You replied, already busying yourself with clearing away empty bottles and glasses. By the time you finished the line of booths, your tray was full to the brim. You hummed along to the music playing over the sound system as you returned to your post, barely noticing your surroundings as you discarded the tray full of clutter. When you swung around, you noticed there were more people at the bar than there were previously. Danny had a smile stuck on his lips as he found himself in mindless conversation with his company. You even found yourself smiling, too, looking over the new faces in attempt to familiarize yourself with them.

The first two looked strikingly familiar, both showcasing features that were not only perfectly suited for their face, but also had an air of similarity. You figured they must be brothers. You and Danny had yet to discuss much other than each other, as the relationship was quite new. You were certain in its strength, but meeting friends was a huge step forward in the process of loving each other. You didn’t stare for too long, realizing that there was another friend you had yet to see. Your head turned down the line of boys, landing on someone who had already made quick work at staring at you. Your stomach dropped, quickly understanding the reason for the other boy’s familiarity. You felt like the ground was stolen from underneath you, that the universe was wrapping its cold fingers around your neck and slowly strangling the life from you. Your palms were sweaty, head spinning with no sign of stopping.

“Remember my order, sweetheart?” He murmured, glancing to his side to make sure Danny hadn’t noticed your volatile reaction.

“Of course I do.” Your words were paired with a scowl, at a loss for ideas on how to dig yourself out of the hole you were in.

You threw your apron in the laundry bin, counting out the cash tips to mark them down in the book. Once it was recorded, you let your hair down from its elastic, running your fingers through the mess of knots the nights stress had created. Once you were able to rid yourself of the aura of darkness that was looming over your head, you managed to force yourself back out into the bar. The noise was immediately overwhelming, seemingly much louder now that you were on the other side of the counter. “Whiskey sour, please.” You gave your coworker a smile, silently thanking them for showing up on time.

“You staying?” He asked, immediately springing to action at your words.

“Guess so.” You sighed, placing the change on the counter. “As if I’m not here enough.” You grumbled. “Danny thinks we should spend our free time here, too.”

“At least try to have fun,” he laughed at your grim expression. As soon as the drink was in front of you, you took a long sip.

“You too.” You chuckled, turning your head to scan the crowd. You noticed that the boys had claimed a booth in your time away, settling in with little hesitation. You walked over, grabbing a chair from a table and placing it at the end of the booth.

It had been years since you and Danny had started dating, and it had been phenomenal. You didn’t have a single complaint aside from Jake, and neither did he. A year or so prior, you had even moved in together. You adored him, and he was your whole world. You had no doubt in choosing him as a life partner, but you did wish that you had never given in to the temptation of Jake. Because even years later, he still looked at you the same way he did that first night he showed up at the bar. Even with no hint of success, or an idea that he would ever have you like that again. He was relentless, and it was excruciating.

Even as in love with Danny as you were, you couldn’t lie and say that Jake was not attractive. You had fallen into bed with him once, and for good reason. You had no desire to be with him, no need for him in any way that mattered, but he was like a parasite, begging to leech life directly from the source. He flirted as if you weren’t practically married to his best friend, as if he didn’t care about hurting him in the crossfire. You shot him down most of the time, but even the best of people had their moments of weakness. There were some nights, albeit few and far between, that you found yourself tipsy enough to entertain him for a moment before the crushing guilt took over.

Danny was not ignorant to what happened between you and Jake. In fact, he was quite aware of Jake’s intense infatuation with you. It would be untruthful to say that it never caused any issues, but there was no world in which it wouldn’t. Danny was quite trusting in you, confident in your love and knew you respected him enough to never stray. That was wholeheartedly true, and being unfaithful to him was never a thought that crossed your mind. Sex with Jake, even as mind blowing as you knew it was, was not worth risking a lifetime of love with Danny. It was futile, and you knew that one night with Jake would always be just that. He hated the thought of commitment, and would never settle down. It was not worth losing everything that Danny gave to you.

“We have to tell him!” You spat, palms landing flat on his chest and pushing him backwards. You were not one for physical violence, but Jake always seemed to bring out the worst in you.

“Fine, then tell him!” He barked back, neither of you caring about your volume or presentability. “Why does it have to fall on me?”

“Because you’re the one who started it! You finally got me to have sex with you, and then you left! You disappeared! You got what you wanted, like always, and now look at the problems it caused!” You exploded. “I’m not risking losing him over someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” He chuckled, looking at you with a fierce shield of carelessness, as if your words hadn’t cut him deeper than a knife. “Fine, we’ll tell him. I’ll go in there and tell him just how good you look from behind, or how beautiful those slutty little noises sound, especially when my name was stuck on those pretty lips. I’m sure he’d love to hear about all of that.” He smirked, lighting a fire in you like no other.

“Fine, I’ll go in there and tell him how you spent weeks getting me to fall for you. Came in here every night so desperate for attention that you couldn’t leave until we kicked you out. You wanted me so bad that you drank us out of liquor, and when you finally had me, you broke my fucking heart. Would you like me to tell your brothers, too? ‘Cause I can talk all night about how terrible of a person you are.” His eyes changed; the defensive nature he previously held was obsolete. He knew he had done wrong, but he had no idea how badly he truly hurt you. He was at a loss for words, so he said the only thing he believed held any meaning.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered. The cold air of the night was nipping at the tip of your nose, but the wind hitting you was unable to compete with the slap of his pathetic apology.

“Fuck you, Jake.” You shook your head, grimacing at the thought of him being apologetic about his actions. “I’m telling him. I really like him, and he deserves the truth. Dishonesty isn’t really my thing, even if it is yours.”

And tell him, you did. It was a tearful confession, an admission of guilt for something you didn’t really need to be ashamed of. He was almost too understanding, showering you with comfort when you felt like he should have walked out. It did sting for him to hear, but he was not willing to blame you for a choice you made months before ever knowing him. His willingness to accept you as is was more than enough for you to fall in love with him. He appreciated the truth, and from there on you two had built a loving life with each other. The thought of Jake was less daunting and more manageable. For the first little while, Jake backed down with the understanding that he was in the wrong. He allowed you to live your life, pretending as if he never knew you until Danny introduced you to each other. It was the amicable thing to do, but unfortunately Jake had no idea how to maintain that outlook. It only took a few months before his insufferable personality made its inevitable return.

“You’re quiet, tonight.” Danny nudged you, sending a soft smile your way.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It was a long shift. I’ve never seen it this busy in here.” You said, taking a long drink from your glass. It was nearing the end, and you were itching to go for another one, just to escape Jake’s burning stare for a moment.

“That’s okay,” he placed his hand on your knee under the table, sending a jolt of comfort through you. “We don’t have to stay out for long.”

“It’s okay,” you assured him, placing your hand atop of his. “We can do whatever. I’ll be happy as long as I’m with you.” He gave you a lingering stare, one that told you he felt the same way, but he wasn’t sure if he completely believed you.

You weren’t certain as to why Jake was bothering you so much more as of recent. Bothering was not the proper term, really. He never bothered you; his advances were not uncomfortable or troublesome. Infuriating by times, yes, but he was harmless in every sense of the word. He was affecting you more, and that was a strange feeling. You had spent the last few years managing to ignore almost every sly pass or risky comment. It had become routine, Jake capturing you in a moment of seclusion and doing his best to make your loyalty falter. It was always the same story; a few eye rolls, a scoff, and maybe even a playful shove that had incredible amounts of hidden frustration behind it. Jake was the master at flirtation, and you had mastered rejection. It grew increasingly easier over time, and now it was barely a chip off your shoulder. The beginning proved tough, but you persevered to a point where it barely bothered you in any way that mattered. Lately, it seemed like it was more impactful than your typical game of cat and mouse. His touches held more emotion, lingering for a moment too long. His eyes held unspoken words, and his moves were no longer meant to maim; they were aimed to kill.

You found yourself playing into him more, entertaining the idea before ultimately shutting it down after the crushing guilt took over. You would never do that again, and even more so, you would never do that to Danny. You repeated the mantra in your head until the words seemed to bleed from the walls. As firm as you were on your stance, Jake had a devastatingly intoxicating attitude, and you weren’t a stranger to his temptation even long after his initial strike all of those years ago.

“Making drinks even on your days off?” The dulcet tone caught your attention, unexpected and causing you to stutter with your movements. The bottle of vodka moved off target and caused a small spill on the table. You didn’t look up to the perpetrator, no need to see him to know who it was.

“You know me, live to work instead of work to live.” You chuckled. It was true; you were so invested in working that a social life had never been a priority for you. Money was a wicked motivator, and even if the bar was not typically bustling, your regulars were quite generous with their tips. You’d been working at the same bar since you had moved out of your parents house and you had no imminent plans to leave. The owners were nice, they had given you a promise of a manger’s position if you ever wanted it, and you thoroughly enjoyed your coworkers company. The wages weren’t awful and the tips were great. You saw no issue with working, and made it a point to do it as much as you could.

“Makes me think that you don’t want to be at home.” Jake theorized, taking a step closer to you as you swiped away the spilled alcohol. “Is everything as fantastic as you make it seem, or is being tied down not all it’s cracked up to be?” He was beside you, now. His charm was radiating from him, inviting you in without you even noticing how badly it burned. You could feel the warmth from his body slowly surrounding you, a feeling that you hadn’t experienced in a long time. You finally looked towards him, trying to maintain some semblance of passiveness with his advance.

“I’m quite content, Jacob.” You said, holding his stare with no intention of backing down. “Makes me think that you’re projecting.” He let out a chuckle, shaking his head at your need to argue.

“Was just a thought, sweetheart.” He looked towards the table. “Is it such a terrible thing to be worried about a friend?”

“Considering you and I are far from friends, and I know you’re not worried about anything other than sex, yeah.” You also looked to the table, pouring the mix into the three glasses before you. You placed straws in each of them, giving a slight stir as you did.

“I didn’t know it was a crime to enjoy sex.” He shrugged, a smirk toying at his lips.

“It’s not. Think lots of people do.” You snipped, looking towards him. “It’s a crime to want it from your best friends girlfriend.” He chuckled, shamelessly enjoying the fire in your tone.

“Not if I had you first,” he reminded, thrilled by the shift in your expression. Talk of what came before Danny had been strictly forbidden, and you both had done well adhering to it after the initial blowout of the truth. His hand slipped to your waist, fingers dangerously dancing close to parts of you he was no longer allowed access to. The tips of his fingers settled just near your ass; not close enough for an offence, but clearly toying the line between right and wrong.

“That never happened, Jake. Remember?” You prompted him to recall the harsh boundaries you had put in place months prior.

“Oh, I remember,” he smiled, pulling you in to him a little closer. “I think about it all of the time. How could I forget?” It was clear that the two of you were not speaking about the same memory. There was no space left between your bodies, your chest pressed to his and his lips hovering over your own. “Do you remember?”

“Jake,” you warned, knowing that this was far beyond any level of comfort for anyone. He was pushing every possible boundary, and you weren’t sure if it was because he wanted you, or if he just wanted to see you crack under the pressure. Most of the time, anything Jake did seemed more like a punishment or a test rather than anything positive. You wanted to believe he was genuine, but you knew him to be sly and willing to do whatever it took to get what he wanted. You could feel him pulling you in despite both of you being as still as possible. It was just how he was; his eyes were inviting, as was every other physical aspect of him. The only deterrent was his personality, and even that wasn’t completely horrible by times. But it was a trick, as it always was, and as much as your body wanted to fall for it, you knew it was more than wrong. It was despicable.

When his nose was touching yours, brushing together with a million sparks of electricity, you finally came back to reality. You raised your hand, pressing it flat to his chest and pushed him backwards. You were livid at yourself for allowing him to get so close, but even angrier at him for trying so hard to make you fall for it. “What’s wrong, sunshine?” He smiled. The air was still laced with notes of whiskey. It radiated off him as if he used it as holy water. At one time, the scent was alluring, deadly when mixed with his cologne. Now, it seemed repulsive. “Not even once, for old times sake?”

“Never again.” You snapped, unwilling to believe that he truly thought you would agree to his request. “You’re hammered.” You noted, feeling the choke of tears in your throat. “Go home.” The regret for even allowing him near you was debilitating.

“All alone?” The smirk he held was infuriating.

“Go home, Jake.” A third voice broke through the tension in the air. You both turned to the entryway of the kitchen, seeing Danny standing with his arms crossed. He didn’t seem angry, more like he just wanted to put an end to the chaos and move on. Jake raised his hands in surrender, casting one more sideways glance at you before shuffling towards the door.

Sam sat a third drink in front of you, prompting you to utter a small thank you for his kind gesture. You were already tipsy, before you even joined them for a drink you could feel your head swirling from exhaustion. Alcohol certainly did not help you wake up, nor did it help the incessant memories from the past. You wasted no time bringing the straw to your lips in attempt to wash down the bitter aftertaste of remembering. You closed your eyes, desperate to focus on anything other than the ache of knowing Jake in any other way than surface level. Even the burn of the whiskey was preferable to the burn of him.

“Maybe you should slow down, baby.” The concerned tone was less of a comfort and more like a stab to an already open wound. You set the glass back on the table, eyes flickering to your boyfriend. You bit the inside of your lip, trying to focus on him and him alone. You could feel Jakes eyes searing into the back of your skull, begging you to look at him instead. Had it been a battle for affection, a challenge of courtship, you could be more sympathetic for the boy, but everyone was painfully aware that Jake was not after you with intentions of marrying. Sure, he liked you, but it was in a way that only Jake could comprehend. To everyone else, it seemed like he viewed you as a conquest, thinking he would have gratification like no other if he was able to steal you back for just one more night. It was vile, and no matter how much you tried to stop it, it only seemed like he was even more mesmerized by you.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry.” You nodded, fidgeting with your hands on your lap. You looked guilty, even if you had nothing to be guilty about. There was never an instance between you and Jake that Danny was unaware of. He was the first to know, and he knew it all. Perhaps your guilt was not accredited to your night spent with Jake, but rather your deepest desire for the chance again. It was horrendous to even consider it, but Jake was unlike anyone else. Again, you had no desire to be with him in any way that mattered, and in truth, sex did not necessarily matter. At least, not in any way worthwhile. You knew that you were undeniably attracted to Jake, and you likely would jump at the opportunity to have sex with him again, as long as it didn’t hurt anyone else. Knowing that it was implausible to invite Jake in without disaster, you shoved that idea as far down as humanly possible. For a long time, it never seemed to resurface, but every time he attempted to ignite the old flame, it seemed to push forward a little more. Tonight, it was impossible to ignore.

By times it seemed like guilt was the only emotion you knew how to feel. Guilt for past mistakes before Danny ever came in to your life, and for being in his life after said mistake. Guilt for giving into his temptation, even if it was just slightly, and even more so for rejecting him while knowing you would accept if the circumstance were different. There was no possibility you could bring the idea up to your boyfriend, and you weren’t sure if you even wanted to. The desire was strong, but not nearly enough to risk losing everything. Instead, you opted to suffer in silence. It was always better that way, anyway. A problem could only be true once it was spoken into existence.

You knew you were incorrect about all of your conclusions, but you chose to continue on the path, anyway. It didn’t matter if you kept it silent; Jake Kiszka was very much a problem, and that would never go away unless it was dealt with directly.

Perhaps it was the decade of friendship that made the predicament so troublesome. You would never bring the situation to an ultimatum, mostly because it was wrong to make him choose between you two, but a small part of you was afraid that you would not win that battle. Your relationship was strong, and had been since the very beginning, but you were unsure if you could compete with a lifetime of friendship, nor the bandmate bond. Jake was going to be a part of Danny’s life indefinitely, and not just in a social setting. They were family, coworkers, and friends. You knew that if you wanted to be in his, too, you would have to learn how to cope with the reality.

“You okay, trouble?” Josh smiled, pointing his gaze at you. You gave a nod, trying to look as pleasant as possible. Even the sound of the nickname made your stomach churn, even if Josh used it in a much better way than his brother did.

“Oh, yeah. Think I just need to get out of the work zone and into the fun one.” You chuckled.

“So what’s with that, anyway?” You asked, handing the whiskey glass to the boy in hopes that you would be lucky enough to brush fingers with him. Any contact was worth the world, even if it was minuscule.

“What?” Jake grinned, doing just as you hoped he would. As he received the glass, he let his fingers rest on yours for just a second too long.

“Why do you call me trouble?” You laughed, unsure of where his nickname originated.

“Oh, I forgot your name. Had to think of something on the spot.” He joked, taking a sip of his drink and watching for a reaction. You rolled your eyes, knowing very well that it was a lie. “You’re gonna make me say it, aren’t you?” He sighed, leaning in a little closer.

“I would appreciate it.” You gave him a sweet smile, coaxing the answer from him.

“It’s my indirect way of saying I like you, sweetheart.” He hummed, eyes never leaving your face. He was revelling in the blush that dusted your cheeks. “Plus, a girl as beautiful as you is nothing but trouble.”

“Don’t flatter me, Jacob.” You brushed him off, but felt yourself leaning closer to him over the bar top.

“But it’s my favourite thing to do.”

“I’m going to grab another drink.” You announced, standing as you looked over the table. “Anyone else?” All of the boys put in their orders, thanking you for the offer. Just as you were about to turn, Jake stood, too.

“You’ll need someone to help carry them,” he said in response to your pointed stare. Without argument or agreement, you turned and walked towards the bar. You didn’t have to see him to know he was following; you could feel it. You took post at the bar, waiting for the bartenders to come to you. Jake joined you, wasting no time placing a light hand on your back. “What’s bothering you, sweetheart?” He asked, voice low enough so only you could hear him.

“I’m just peachy, Jake. No need to worry.” You grumbled, pulling out your card to pay for the order.

“For some reason, I don’t think that’s true.” He also pulled out his wallet, ready to race you for the bill. “Usually you already would have threatened to throw a drink at me. Tonight, you won’t even look at me.”

“It would be a waste of a perfectly good drink.” Your response was short and sweet, clearly showcasing your desire to end the conversation.

“Have I got you that bothered, tonight?” You could hear the smirk in his tone before you even looked at him.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you scoffed, finally looking over to meet his eyes. The sight of his face was enough to make your heart skip a beat, so beautiful that it was almost haunting. The parallels of the two universes were debilitating when you thought about them for too long; one in which Jake would trip over himself to flatter you, and one where you would kick him to the ground before he could try.

“Don’t have to; you do that for me.” His smirk turned into a smile, his hand still lingering on your lower back.

“How many times do I have to tell you this is never going to happen?” You sighed.

“When you actually mean it.” He chirped back, wasting no time.

“I think I’ve been pretty clear.” You argued. “You know, like the the million other times I’ve told you.”

“Right,” he nodded, but mischief was dancing in his eyes. “So you don’t like it when I stop by to see you before everyone else? Or when I tell you how pretty you look?” He chuckled, already knowing the answer. “I think that you do like it, just not when Danny’s around.” And he was correct, as disgusting as it was. You had said a million times that you didn’t care for his antics, but he could see the dishonesty as if it were written all over you and stamped on your forehead in big, red letters.

“I think that you should learn how to listen, Jacob.” Even as you spoke, you could feel yourself leaning into his side ever so slightly, wordlessly inviting his attention and touch.

“I’m listening, y/n.” He assured you, mouth leaning in closer to your ear. You were enveloped in a cloud of alcohol, both of your inhibitions lowered and the primal pleasure from the touch was undeniable. “I’ll listen to you all night, if you’ll let me, but I don’t think you’ll be doing much talking.”

“Jake, I’m in love with your best friend.” You reminded.

“I’m not asking you to be in love with me.” He said, lips barely hovering over your ear now.

“This is wrong. You have to stop.” You muttered, but the warning was feeble, barely any strength behind it. He had finally gotten ahead, and he was relishing in his victory. “He’s your best friend, Jake. This is despicable.”

“Fine,” he seemed like he was going to bargain, but knowing Jake, his bargain was not worth the time or energy. “If you won’t let me take you home, you can go over there and bat your eyes, give him a sweet little smile, and ask him if he’ll let me join.” The idea struck you like a blow to the gut, settling in your bones and engulfing any existing thought in your brain. It seeped under your skin and into your veins like poison, diluting any healthy rationale and suffocating any moral. You had been so volatile at the thought of Jake that it had never even crossed your mind to think of that possibility. He could see it in your eyes, the flash of excitement at the suggestion. “See? I knew you didn’t mean it, trouble.” He tightened his grip on you slightly as he watched the elation deflate from your eye. He wasn’t suggesting it, he was only offering the idea to prove his point. “You want me, but you don’t want to hurt him.”

“Yeah, because the only use I have for you is sex. I’m in love with him.” You snapped, furious that he had played you in such a way.

“That’s all I wanted to hear, sweetheart.” He grinned. “But, if you do want to ask him, I don’t mind sharing.” He hummed. “I’d do anything to have you, again.”

“Fuck you,” you brushed off his comment, turning to the bartender and ordering the list of drinks that the others had requested.

“You’d like to,” he teased, paying for the order before you could even think of doing so. He gave you one last smile before grabbing two glasses from the counter and making his way over to the table. You tried to satiate the bubble of anger as you waited for the rest of your order, but it proved nearly impossible. You walked back to the table with a sour taste in your mouth and an overwhelming urge to go home. Worse than anything else, when you returned, the distant pained look in Danny’s eye made the interaction all the more disturbing. He knew, like always, and there was no way to hide it. When you looked to him, he averted his gaze towards Sam, who was sitting on the other side of him.

“I don’t know what to say, Danny!” You exploded, tears prickling your eyes. “I love you, and I want to be with you. Always have, and I’ve known that from the minute I met you.”

“I feel that way too, so I just don’t understand what’s so special about Jake! If you want to be with me, and you love me so much, why does it seem like you cling to the attention from him?” He ran a hand through his hair, not wanting to be upset with you but having no other way to express his feelings.

“If I could have it my way, I’d never speak to him again! I never wanted to, and then I started dating you and he magically appeared!” You tried to word your frustration as best you could. “I’m not trying to entertain him, but it gets a little hard to ignore him when he’s always around and doesn’t want to leave me alone!” You took a seat beside him at the table, silently begging him to look at you. “Danny, you have to know that I would never do that to you.”

“I know!” He snapped, causing you to recoil from the harshness. He finally looked up at you, remorse evident in his eyes. “I’m sorry, y/n. I know you wouldn’t.” He assured you. “Do you have feelings for him?”

“No, baby.” You reached out for his hand. It was not a lie; you did not have any romantic feelings or anything of the sorts when it came to Jake. You were attracted to him, and you knew that he knew as much. You didn’t have to remind him. “I only feel that way for you.” You assured him.

“It’s just hard, y/n. He looks at you sometimes and I wonder… I just wonder when the day will come when he finally grows up and realizes that he wants to settle down, because I know you’ll be the only person he’s looking at.”

“Jake will never grow up.” You shut that idea down, both of you quickly realizing how blasphemous it sounded. “And it doesn’t matter if he’s looking at me, because I don’t want that with him. I had feelings for him a very long time ago, and he hurt me really bad. There’s no part of me that feels like that way for him, now. I fell in love with you, and fell for a reason. I want you to know that you’re the only one who has my heart.”

Danny was fidgeting with his hands, a sure sign that he was upset. You couldn’t blame him; if it were the other way around, you would be, too. You wished you knew how to ward off Jake for good, and in turn suffocate any of the remaining sexual desires for him. You hated that amidst the struggle, Danny felt hurt enough to doubt your love for him. Of all the things that you have felt, or imagined about Jake, they didn’t hold a candle to Danny. Under the table, you reached out for his knee. You rested your palm on his leg, thumb gently running over the fabric of his jeans. You could feel him relax under your touch almost immediately. His eyes flickered towards you, seeing the sincerity in your face almost immediately. He leaned back in the booth and slipped his hand atop of yours, a silent show of affection.

You motioned your head towards the door, pleading with him for a moment alone. He nodded, standing first and allowing you to lead the way. You both headed outside, hand in hand with no regard for anyone else at the table. When you broke out onto the patio, the cool evening stung your skin. You were almost nervous to look at him, unsure of what to say. “I know you’re attracted to him, y/n. It’s not a secret.” The words weighed you down as if you were buried in cement.

“I don’t love him, Danny.”

“No, but you do feel something for him.”

“Not in any way that matters.” You took a step towards the wooden fence of the entryway. He followed, looking down at you as he took your side. “Not in any way that compares to you.”

“I know.” He assured you. “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.” He shrugged.

“I know.” You felt your chest ache at the proclamation of pain. That was something you never wanted to cause him. “I don’t know what to do. He’s… persistent.”

“Yeah, always been that way.” Danny explained. “Guess it didn’t matter as much before because I’ve never loved someone as much as I love you.” You looked to the ground, the weight of shame making it impossible for you to look at him. “Look, I’m not mad at you.” He said, his hand snaking around your waist. “I knew that this would always be an issue, but I love you enough to work through it.”

“I don’t think that’s fair, Danny.” You sighed, closing your eyes at the feeling of his touch. It was the most comforting thing to ever exist.

“Listen, you’ve never actually done anything with him, have you?”

“Of course not.” You shook your head, unable to imagine betraying him in such a way.

“He’s a dog, and I’m sure you know that. I’m not really worried that you’ll leave, or anything like that. I think maybe in the beginning I was, but I know that after this many years, if something was going to happen, it would have happened already.” He pulled you into him, allowing you to rest your head on his chest without actually having to turn to look at him. “I don’t think you slept with him and then got with me as revenge. If so, you’ve played a fantastic game.” He laughed, and you did too. “You’ve told him him to back off, and I have, too, but I don’t think he would have stuck with it if he didn’t believe there was a chance.” You closed your eyes, bracing for the impact of a breakup. You wouldn’t blame him if he did. “It’s okay to be attracted to him. You’re human, and it’s a normal human thing. I also know you enough to know that you wouldn’t have gotten with him at all if you never felt anything for him.”

“It doesn’t make it right.” You were fully willing to take blame, to understand that this was a despicable thing for you to be feeling.

“No, but what I’m saying is, I continued to date you knowing the history. Still do. You were always honest with me. You’ve never lied to me, and I respect that more than anything else. I see you two together; I know that spark is there. I’m not going to punish you for that because you’ve never tried to hide it or lie about it. It’s normal for you to be attracted to people, and it’s normal for me to be hurt about it. But I think our spark is a hell of a lot bigger, and I love you far too much to not try and work this out.” You finally felt a tear slip from your eye as you wrapped your arms around him.

“I wish I never met him. I wish I could have met you, first. I don’t want to feel this way.” Your words were muffled from your face being buried in his chest, but he got the message. He held you to him, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

“I know, and part of me does, too.” He whispered. You both sat there, holding each other in hopes that it would take all of the bad away. “I think that you need some sleep, because I can see how tired you are. We can figure out how to get through it, and I know we can, but it should be in the morning.” He said, cupping your cheek in his hand and guiding your head up to look at him. He swiped away the tears with his thumb, giving you a small smile to let you know he meant everything he said.

“I don’t deserve you.” You mumbled, completely lost in his eyes. The more you stared, the more things seemed to feel better. He was home, and he always would be. He was the love of your life, and you were more certain of that than anything else. “I’m sorry that I caused this. I wish I could go back in time and make some different decisions, maybe we wouldn’t be here.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t know you at all.” He theorized, and that was the worst thought of all. “It’s been four years, bug. We can make anything work. I know you love me, and I trust you; I always have.” he leaned down and placed a kiss on your lips, the feeling more soothing than any words shared.

“If it means I get to keep you, I’ll never look at him ever again.” You swore to it, knowing deep down that when it came to your relationship with Danny, you would go to the ends of the earth to salvage it.

“I don’t think we’ll have to go that far.” He chuckled, placing another kiss to your lips. “And you do deserve me. I know that you do, because after four years, you’ve never given in to him. If he flirted with me like that, I’m sure I would’ve cracked by now.” At the thought of it, you both dissolved into a fit of laughter. “Jake has always been Jake. I think he feels like he lost, and he never really got over it.”

“He did lose,” you laughed “if it were ever a competition between you two, he wouldn’t have even made it to the starting line.” You leaned up for another kiss as you finished, so incredibly grateful to have someone so understanding. Danny was the best in every sense of the word, and you had known that long before that night.

“I think after so long of you brushing it off and telling me it was okay, it was just routine. At first, him and I had plenty of words and none of them were polite. After a while, I saw that you could handle your own, and you always told me not to worry or fight with him. I trust you, but I probably shouldn’t have been so passive about it.” He explained. “If I ever thought he pushed it too far, or if he had made you uncomfortable, I would have killed him. Still would, actually. But you always seemed to laugh it off. Every time I mentioned it, you never seemed to care about him flirting, just about hurting me. I think we’ve all known for a long time, and I think that it just became so normal that we chose to ignore it.”

“Jake never bothered me.” You shrugged. “He’s harmless, and I know that. Think everyone else does, too. He just loves to flirt, and he loves attention. Sometimes, it’s actually kind of funny to see him try so hard and make a fool of himself. I care about Jake as a friend, and I do quite like him for company, but I guess I never wanted anyone to fight about it because I knew he could never be you. I think we all just let it go too far without talking about it.” You said, allowing your fingers to dance with his. Your eyes scanned his face, noticing how beautiful it looked in the dim moonlight. You felt stupid for ever having a shred of attraction for Jake, because Danny was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, inside and out. You had the world in your hands, and you took it for granted. “I never wanted to hurt you. I never want to hurt you. You’re the most important person in my life, and I love you with every ounce of my being.”

“I love you, and I know you love me. I know we love each other enough to make anything work.” You knew he was right, because there was nothing you wouldn’t do to keep him by your side.

“Thank you for being the best.” You whispered. “And for wanting to work it out. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I know you will.” He placed a kiss to your head. “You don’t have to thank me for anything.” You rested in his arms for a moment, and the longer you spent there, the more things seemed to look up.

“I’m gonna head home. I think I need to go to bed.” You told him, pulling back slightly.

“Do you want me to come with you?” He said, looking down at you with concern.

“No, please stay and enjoy the rest of your night. I ruined it enough already.” You shook your head. “I’m just going to take a shower and go to sleep.”

“I’d enjoy it with you, too, you know. And you didn’t ruin anything.” He told you, looking more serious than he’d ever been.

“I know, baby.” You assured him. “I’ll be okay. Go in and have a few drinks, and have fun. I’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready to come to bed.” You smiled, standing on your tip-toes to place a kiss on his cheek. “I love you.”

“I love you.” He hummed, stealing one last kiss before you made your departure. “Call me if you need me, or even if you just want to say hi.”

“You know I will.” You gave his hand one last squeeze before taking a step away. He blew you a kiss before you turned out of sight, and as always, you pretended to catch it. He only went back inside once you were out of sight.

Luckily for you, your home wasn’t too far away from the bar. You normally walked to and from work, and it was almost your favourite part of the day. It allowed you a few moments of peace, and you could decompress from any of the day’s excitement. As you made your way down the street, you felt the weight on your shoulders lift. You felt better knowing that Danny was aware Jake was no more than a guilty pleasure, and that he was the love of your life. Part of you still felt dirty for even feeling as such, but the knowledge that you were both willing to work through it was more important than anything else. As you tumbled up your porch stairs, you wasted no time unlocking the door and bustling inside. You were eager for a shower to wash the stress of the day off, and your stomach was begging you for a bite to eat.

You kicked your shoes off and immediately went to the kitchen. You rustled around in the fridge before you found leftovers from last night’s dinner. As you warmed it up, you unbuttoned your jeans and slipped out of them. You placed them on the back of a chair and made a mental note to throw them in the laundry basket later. You ate in silence, enjoying the sound of nothing after hearing the constant buzz of a bar for hours on end. You threw your dishes in the sink and made your way upstairs to the bathroom. After you showered, you felt like a brand new person. You took extra time to do your skincare routine, and blow dried your hair before climbing into bed. The sheets were welcoming, still lingering with the scent of Danny’s cologne. When you nestled your head in the pillows, you were surrounded by the smell of his shampoo. It was the epitome of comfort, and you wished you never had to leave. It didn’t take too long until your eyes grew heavy, and the thought of sleep was too tempting to resist. You pulled the blankets up to your chin and drifted off into a slumber.

When you woke, it was still dark outside and the bed was still very much empty. You thought it was strange, figuring Danny would be back and asleep long before then. You rubbed your eyes, looking to the alarm clock on your beside and noticing that it was well into the night, now. You figured that Danny was the safest with his brothers, and you need not worry about someone over a foot taller and much stronger than you. You were about to close your eyes and fall back to sleep, but you heard the distant shutting of a door and muted chatter. Danny must have invited the boys over, which he so often did. You figured now that he was home safe, you could sleep soundly.

You settled back into the pillows, lax against the mattress and welcoming of any slumber that was willing to come to you. The sound of the same chatter began to fill the hallway, striking you as something even more strange. If you were sleeping, Danny aimed to keep the house as quiet as possible. It was unlike him to be speaking so loudly, especially so close to the bedroom. You sat up again, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Before you could even think to speak, or stand and confront the disturbance, the door of the bedroom creaked open. The chatter was obsolete, now, and the hallway light pooled in through the opening. You saw Danny, immediately prompting a smile on your face. Once he saw you were awake, he took a step inside. “Hi baby.” You crooned, excited that he was home. He didn’t respond, just took another step further into the room.

Behind him was another body, one that you couldn’t recognize through the darkness. When he turned and the flash of light reflected off the walls just right, your stomach dropped. “Hello, trouble.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“What’s…. What’s up?” You looked between the two boys, unsure of how to react to the situation.

“Mind if we turn a light on?” Jake asked. “Hard to see your beautiful face when it’s so dark in here.” The words settled in the pit of your stomach, making you unable to form a coherent response. Even in the simplicity of the statement, the tone of his voice alone sent a rush of arousal straight to your core. You were too close to sleep to have any inkling of right or wrong.

“Y-yeah,” you stuttered, looking to your boyfriend for an answer. Even in the minimal light, you could sense an air of mischief on his features. You shuffled around, searching blindly for the lamp on your nightstand. Once you located the switch, you flicked it on. A soft yellow hue decorated the walls, illuminating both boys in all of their beauty. “Better?”

“Much.” Jake smiled, but it was all but genuine. You weren’t sure if you were in a dream, mind crazed from the days whirlwind of events and fabricating some sort of twisted narrative that you wished was real. Although you seemed awake, the haze of dream and imagination nowhere in sight, the situation seemed too odd to be true. You watched the two, curious as to what they were doing, and even more so about what they were thinking. If you were in reality, they were acting more out of character than they ever had before. “Did you get some sleep, sweetheart?” Jake questioned, eyes lingering everywhere except for your own. He looked as if he was already imagining what lie beneath the mountain of blankets.

“Yeah,” you nodded, figuring the best way to find out what was happening was to play along.

“That’s good,” Jake nodded, looking to his counterpart. “You’re definitely going to need it. Long night ahead.” He gave another smile, but this one radiated excitement. You looked to Danny, silently pleading with him for an answer.

“What?” Danny asked, tone only moderately harsh. You could tell the softness was dancing behind his eyes, waiting to be seen. “Isn’t this exactly what you wanted?” He took a step towards the bed.

“What is this?” You pried, unable to answer without more information.

“Come on, sweetheart. You’re smarter than that.” Jake urged you to answer your own question. You looked between them, studying each of their expressions for a moment. When you did, your eyes widened, mouth slightly agape in shock. You recognized both expressions far too well, and one was something you hadn’t seen in a very long time. “There you go.” Jake gave the small utter of praise, happy you were on the same page.

“I figured if you want him so bad, I’ll let you have him, but I’ve gotta have my fun, too.” Danny murmured, also looking at you with a hunger in his eyes you had only seen a few times. You were gazing at him in wonder, as if he’d given you the gift of life, unable to imagine a better way to rid yourself of the horrendous things you were feeling about Jake. “That sound okay to you, baby?” He asked, moving to your side. He looked down at you, the streak of dominance that he had a tendency for was incredibly apparent. As he waited for a reply, there was no doubt in your mind that he was more than serious. It was grievous, the fire dancing in his pupils. There would be no backtalk, no bargaining, nothing of the sorts. He was kind enough to let you have a taste of your own guilty pleasure, but it was under his authority. He was in charge, and you didn’t have the power to be anything other than obedient.

“Yes, daddy.” You spoke, in utter awe of the power he had over you. Jake looked to Danny, his expression showing nothing short of elation at the sound of your words. Danny took a glance over at him, a small smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. You could smell the alcohol from both of them, understanding that within their drunk ramblings, you must have came up in conversation. In attempt to settle the score, this was their conclusion.

“I told you.” Was all he said.

“Told him what?” You squeaked, almost embarrassed at your own willingness to submit to him.

“I told him all about you, baby.” He assured you. “Told him how well you listen, and all about how much of a whore you can be.” The ache between your legs was growing more intense by the second, still unable to comprehend the situation you had found yourself in. “But he’d know all about that, wouldn’t he?” His comment was snide, but you didn’t let it bother you. Your eyes flickered to Jake, a nervous jitter rushing through you. You were quite familiar with Danny’s character, and when the whole thing was over, he would go right back to the sweet boy you saw most of the time. He reached out, grabbing your chin in his hand and guiding you to look back at him. “I’m talking to you, not him.”

“Y-yes,” you nodded, agreeing with his statement. “He does.” You felt no shame in it, now. What was usually the elephant in the room was now nothing more than a driving force for the nights events.

“It was so good that you’re still thinking about it, yeah?” You nodded against the force of his hand, a small noise of confirmation sounding from your chest. “Better than I can make you feel?” He raised an eyebrow, but in no way were you willing to engage in his trap with both of them holding so much authority over you. “He’s going to get you off, and then we’ll see if you can give me an answer.” Your cheeks burned red, now nervous at the thought. You knew that Danny and Jake had likely discussed this in depth before coming home to you, but you weren’t sure if Danny really knew what he was getting himself into.

“I-I don’t-“

“What?” He snapped. “Been inviting him in for years, but now you’re too shy?” He taunted. “All talk, no action?” He could see the spark of indignation in your eye, happy that he’d pressed the right button. “Don’t worry, I’ll get my turn, too. So, you just keep your mouth shut and do as you’re fucking told.” He said, no debate about the matter.

“Okay,” you agreed, eyes never once straying from him. Although you had desperately wanted a moment like this with Jake, you still seemed to be plagued with guilt over the matter even with Danny’s explicit permission. He noticed it in your eyes as he moved to sit on the chair you had placed beside the bed. When you put it there for the intent of reading, you surely never thought it would be used for such a vulgar showing.

“It’s okay.” He assured you, his tone much softer than it was a moment before. “I’m okay.” You were both locked in a staring contest, but as he uttered the profession of comfortability, your worried gazed turned into a silent profession of love. Under the hard exterior, he let a loving smile peek through. You let out an exhale, content with knowing he was okay. With that, you turned to look at Jake, unable to deny the flutter of excitement in your belly. When he saw the hopeful gleam in your eyes, he couldn’t help but smile down at you, too.

“Never thought I’d get to see you like this again, trouble.” He stated, taking a step towards the edge of the bed. You sat patiently, waiting for an order from him. Although long ago, your night spent with him left you aware of his love for control, too. “Are you going to be good for me, too? Listen to me just like you do for him?”

“Yes, sir.” You nodded, entranced by the thought of him touching you again. He took a deep breath, the sound of the words washing over him like a shower of relief. He was more than thrilled that you had remembered him so well, thrilled that after so many years the experience for you was still so memorable in your mind.

“Come here, angel.” He beckoned you towards him, expecting immediate action. You slipped out from under the blanket, rising to your knees and moving towards him on the bed. When you were within arms reach, he cupped your cheek in his hand, peering down at you with adoration. He wasn’t shy to admit that he was elated to have you again. As much as his tirade was about mischief, the need to make you admit you wanted him, it also had a lot to do with his own need for you. He leaned down, wasting no time in pulling you into a kiss. It was hungry, desperate to make up for years of abstaining from the feeling. His other hand found your hip, fingers inching under the t-shirt that was covering you.

The sensation was unexplainable, the pleasure derived just from kissing him was overwhelming. Paired with the feeling of his hands on your skin, it was driving you insane. He used his wrist to hold up the fabric as his palm drifted towards your ass, he let his hand rest there, the cool metal of his ring he adorned on his finger sending a shiver through you. His grip was tight and showcased exactly how excited he was for the ability to have you again. He broke from you but didn’t move too far away. His nose was still ghosting over yours, almost as if he was scared you would disappear if he moved too far away. “Seems like you were waiting for us,” he noted, his finger slipping under the thin material of your underwear. “Were you hoping that we would come and take care of you?” He cooed, his sympathy clearly false as his lips drifted towards your jaw.

“G-god yes,” you let out a shaky sigh as his lips ghosted over your neck. He was making it a point to show you how well he remembered the sensitive spots, finding them with ease in hopes you might let a moan slip past your lips. He’d been yearning to hear it for so long that he wasn’t sure he could wait any longer.

“Let me take this off, angel.” He hummed, letting his hands snake under your shirt. As if the realization truly hit you as to what you were doing, you froze at the request, quickly looking to Danny with a hint of panic in your eye.

“It’s okay, baby.” He said, noticing your worry. He was sitting in the chair, observing the sight without a worry in the world. “This was my idea. I’ll tell you if I’m uncomfortable.” He said, hoping to crush your fear once and for all.

“Let me take care of you,” Jake said, also attempting to ease your worry. You looked back to him, giving a slight nod. With that, you allowed him to slip your shirt over your head. The cool air hit you immediately, but Jake was quick with his hands to warm you back up. His thumb brushed over your nipple, the light touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. “Do you know how long I’ve waited to see you like this?” He asked, taking a moment to admire the sight before him. You bit the inside of your lip, nervous about being on display for both boys at once. “It was terrible, only being able to dream about it.” He muttered, leaning forward for another kiss. Perhaps it was because of the incessant need for him that had been eating away at you for months, or maybe because you were finally realizing that he wanted you just as bad, but you were a mess before he even took your clothes off, and you were desperate for him to keep going. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, gently biting down as his hand continued to explore your breast. The friction from the pad of his thumb was delightful, even if he was barely touching you. You let a small moan slip into his mouth, immediately sending him into euphoria.

“Did you miss me?” His fingers trailed down your torso, ticking the skin as he familiarized himself with you.

“Yeah,” you admitted, all sense of shame disappearing long ago. He moved back slightly, ridding himself of his shirt.

“Let’s get rid of these, okay?” His fingers slid under the side of your underwear, pulling it back and releasing his hold so it snapped back against your skin. You nodded, laying back on the bed and removing the flimsy fabric from your body. Jake moved towards the side of the bed, casting a sideways glance at Danny as he did so. “If you ask him nicely, do you think he’d give us some alone time?” Jake smirked, raising an eyebrow at you as he asked. “You always seem to get your way.”

“Watch it.” Danny warned, clearly not a fan of his joke.

“Just thought I’d try.” Jake said, brushing off the harsh reaction.

“Can’t perform under pressure?” The snide comment was used for show, Danny making it a point to let Jake know that he was not the one in charge of the situation.

“Feeling left out, Daniel?” Jake asked as he undid his belt buckle. “Jealous, maybe?”

“Haven’t really seen anything to be concerned about, yet.” The argument only proved that Jake was invited over solely for the sake of you. After four years of strictly monogamous dating, Danny never seemed to have an interest in sharing you with anybody. You knew he would never do anything that would put a strain on your relationship, or anything that he was blatantly uncomfortable with, but you were certain he was likely struggling a little bit with the situation. When you turned to look at him again, his eyes didn’t seem angry at all; he was relaxed, sitting as if this was a normal occurrence. You realized then that Danny wasn’t worried at all about competing with Jake, because he knew there was no need. He just wanted Jake to know that the situation was reliant on his generosity, and he could put an end to it if he wanted to do so.

When you looked back, the comment seemed to spark a flame in Jake’s eyes. One that spoke loudly about his love of competitive sport, and to him, this was exactly what the situation was. He opted not to respond, instead climbing into bed on the opposite side of you, ensuring Danny had a perfect view of what was coming next. You watched your boyfriend for a moment, searching for any signs of discomfort, but he was perfectly pleased with watching you fulfill your fantasy. You assumed it was because he knew that Jake would only have you for a moment, and he was promised a lifetime. Danny was never one for jealousy, and it was evident that not even in this situation did it bother him. The conversation you both shared earlier had allowed him to settle any fear and open his mind to possibility. Jake and Danny had shared an in depth discussion before even uttering the idea of him joining Danny. Rules, boundaries, and the knowledge that if someone was uncomfortable at any point, it would be over. The harmless banter was inevitable, but they were both on the same page; they were in it to please you, and that was it.

Jakes hand slipped between your legs, his fingers immediately running through your folds to gather the arousal he’d been causing you. As if it was something he did so often, something he knew so well, his fingers immediately found your clit. He traced circles into the sensitive bud, sending a rush of emotion through you. It had been so long that you had almost forgotten how fantastic it felt to be touched by him. He kept the pressure light, but his motion steady. He barely had to do anything to pry a moan from your lips. “Just like that?” He asked, looking over your face with a distant longing behind his eyes. “Does that feel good?”

“So good,” you breathed, eyes fluttering closed. You could feel his erection strained against his jeans, begging for any type of relief. You were eager to touch him, almost more so than you were for him to touch you. From what you remembered, Jake was not one to take things slow, but you wondered if he was pacing himself in fear of crossing any boundaries. He had spent years pining after you, always being shot down and eventually he had to understand that he would never get an opportunity to be with you again. Now that you were here, with his hands on you, and his name rolling so beautifully from your tongue, he wanted to savour it.

He increased the pressure, gaze never faltering in hopes to sear the memory into his brain forever. You let a gasp out, your hips raising from the bed to meet the movement of his thumb. He gave you a small smile, content at the reaction. “Give him a show, sweetheart. Make some noise, thank him for being so kind.” Jake purred, eyes flickering up to Danny for a moment. Your eyes followed the same direction, catching your boyfriends gaze just as Jake slipped a finger inside you. You held his stare, feeling a moan rise in your throat. You weren’t sure if it was from Jakes movement, or the carnal desire that was written all over Danny’s face. His jaw was hard set, chest heaving with his breath, but his eyes were not angry; they were half-lidded, clouded with enjoyment from the sight.

Jake gave a slight curl of his fingers as he began pumping them into you, his thumb drifting over your clit each time. The feeling was intense, only made worse when he leaned down to pull your nipple into his mouth. Your pleasure was impossible to hide, the work Jake was doing was intensified because you had the opportunity to watch Danny. With his eyes locked with yours, you felt a great need to reach out and touch him. You thought he looked quite lonely, and you were overwhelmed with the desire to have him, too. He noticed the look you were giving him, quite elated at the knowledge you still wanted him even with Jake so accessible to you. You saw him palm himself through his jeans, clearly worked up and desperate for relief, too.

Jake let his teeth sink into your nipple, just slight enough to catch you off guard. Although he would never admit it, he did feel a spark of jealousy upon noticing your disengagement from his actions. He sped his fingers, pulling you back into a cloud of euphoria. Your eyes fluttered closed, your head resting back on the pillow as your mind swirled with the threat of an orgasm. Abruptly, he stopped his movements, violently tearing you away from the dream-like state. You turned to look at him, barely catching his eye before he was slinking downwards on the bed. He settled between your legs, guiding one over his shoulder. You let a sigh of delight out as he brought his mouth to your cunt, running his tongue through you to get a taste of his own hard work.

“F-fuck,” you gasped, his tongue making quick work at circling your clit. Your hand instinctively reached for his hair, fingers tangling in the roots and giving a slight tug every time he hit a particularly pleasant spot. He added his fingers to you, resuming his earlier pace. You were thrown into a whole new dimension of bliss, already close to a climax with little effort. His tongue was just as devilish as his personality; every move was calculated, aimed for maximum impact. He was desperate to get you to an orgasm, needing it more than he needed water to survive. His own enjoyment was almost overshadowing yours, every now and again he would let out a moan against you just to show you how happy he was to be of service to you. “Jake, m’gonna cum.” You warned.

“Look at me.” Danny spoke, now. The order ran through you, his voice sending a new type of pleasure through you. You let your head fall to the side, more than willing to follow the order. The look of longing in his eyes was stronger than you’d ever seen from him before. It was strong enough that it immediately sent you over the edge upon noticing it. Your climax hit you hard, all of your muscles tensing as you let out a slur of moans and curses. The walls were decorated with your sounds of pleasure, the memory sinking into the foundation with intent to stay forever. The obscene display was almost too much for Danny to sit through, his need for you too great to be ignored.

“Taste even better than I remember, sweetheart.” Jake’s voice echoed in your ears, but you were too far gone to cognitively understand what he was saying. You barely had time to come down before Danny was on his feet, barking an order at Jake to get up.

Your head was spinning, trying to focus on something other than the residual energy of your orgasm pulsing through you. At Danny’s request, Jake stood without argument. Your orgasm was glistening on his chin, adorned like a trophy of his most proudest moment. Without another word, Danny stripped himself of his clothes and took the position that Jake had previously held. He wasted no time, immediately placing soft kisses to the inside of your thighs in attempt to convey his love for you. Danny was not jealous of Jake because he was pleasuring you; he was just eager to do it himself. “I told you I’d get my turn, baby.” He mumbled, lips still ghosting over your skin. Jake was watching you, almost seeming unsure of what to do with himself. “Do you want me, beautiful?” His fingertips grazed the outside of your thighs, selling on your hips in a firm hold.

“Yeah,” You nodded, reaching out to cup his cheek with your hand. You let your thumb drift over his cheek, showcasing the love you had for him in the small gesture. He turned his head slightly, placing a kiss to the pad of your thumb.

“I want to hear how bad you want it,” he muttered, his voice low and his order clear.

“Please, daddy. I need you. I need you so bad.” Your shameless begging was put to good use, as usual. Danny was always willing to give you what you wanted, but there was a few things he liked hearing. You were never one to deprive him of his desires, mostly because they were few and far between. He let out a hum of satisfaction, pleased at the sound of your words.

“Okay, baby.” He sighed, as if your begging was tireless and brutal. He was so quick to give in to you that it even bothered him, sometimes. “You know I’ll always give you what you want.” He was inches away from you now, so close that it was near painful to wait any longer. “But you have to take care of him, too, since he was so good to you.” Without looking up, Danny nodded his head towards Jake. The thought was thrilling, to be used by both boys however they wished. You thought that there was no better idea in the world. Your eyes fluttered towards Jake, looking expectedly at him, as if you were waiting for him to tell you what he wanted. The expression was crippling for him, the innocent aura engraved into your face tainted with your willingness to do whatever he pleased. “Show him what a good little whore you can be.”

“Yes, sir.” You breathed, nearly vibrating with excitement at the thought of Jake taking the rest of his clothes off.

“She always been this obedient?” Jake asked, a hint of humour in his tone.

“Took a while,” you could hear the smirk in Danny’s voice without even looking at him. “But I think it paid off.” You bit the inside of your lip, holding back any snide comments you wanted to convey about his jabs. You knew better, and in truth, he wasn’t lying. It was very rare for you to talk back in the bedroom, and even more so for you to contest his authority in any way. Danny was so kind and catering in every aspect of every day life, but during sex, his kindness was limited and his word was final. You learned quite quickly that if you chose to challenge him, it only made it harder for you to get what you wanted.

Jake hummed an agreement, an unspoken praise for Danny’s work. As he unbuttoned his jeans, Danny prompted you to shift closer to the edge of the bed. Jake kicked the rest of his clothes to the side, uncaring about where they landed. The sight of him naked began to form another knot in your belly, promoted without any touching at all. Jake was gorgeous, and it seemed like he had only gotten more so over the years. “Open,” he commanded, stepping closer to you. You did as he asked, turning your head to the side and opening your mouth, welcoming him to do as he wished. At the same time, Danny lowered his mouth to your cunt, resuming what Jake had been doing earlier. Jake wasted no time thrusting into your mouth, immediately letting out a hiss of pleasure. He started at a slow pace, not wanting to push you too far too soon. You let out a moan, muffled by his cock in your mouth. It was your way of telling both boys you were more than content with the current situation.

Danny slipped his fingers into you, curling them to hit the spot he’d grown so familiar with. Jake was phenomenal, but it was no comparison to your boyfriend. He had spent nearly half a decade memorizing every like and dislike, and undoubtedly had the power to bring you to an orgasm in seconds. Both sensations were equally intense, Danny’s tongue was focused intently on your clit and sending waves of pleasure through you, while the knowledge of pleasuring Jake was euphoric all on its own. Jake let out a groan, unashamedly admitting his enjoyment as he began to move his hips a bit faster. You closed your eyes, aiming to keep your breathing steady and your body relaxed.

“Fuck, y/n.” Jake hissed, his head falling back as he spoke. “Look so pretty with my cock in your mouth.” His words sent another rush of arousal through you, seeing every nerve on fire. The praise was heavenly, so good that you realized you could survive off the sound alone. The position you found yourself in was more than just unexpected, but something you never would have imagined possible. Although your processing of the information was difficult, it was incredibly welcomed. Just because you had never thought it possible did not mean you hadn’t dreamed of it a time or two. You almost felt in debt with Danny, knowing that his permission and kindness had given you something so fantastic. You weren’t sure if you could ever thank him enough.

You let out another strangled moan as Danny’s fingers hit the perfect spot, sending another wave of pleasure throughout your body. Paired with the feeling of his tongue, you were dangerously close to the edge once more. You couldn’t verbally warn him, but he knew the signs all too well. His fingers were searing into your hips, holding you to him as he let out a hum, just to let you know that he knew you were close. It was a permissive gesture; he had no intention of stopping or withholding anything from you. Jake was lost in his own world, barely able to comprehend the feeling of fucking you again, even if it was only your mouth. He was hoping you would finish soon, just so he wouldn’t have to pull away first. Danny felt you tense under his hold, now speeding his movements in hopes to bring you to an orgasm. Although he didn’t find himself jealous that Jake was touching you, he did find himself envious that he wasn’t the one behind the moans falling from your lips. He was eager to please you, wanting the gratification of your orgasm like he needed it to survive.

“Are you gonna cum, angel?” Jake managed the words out through gritted teeth, still blissfully lost in the feeling of your mouth. You looked up to him, both of you knowing that you couldn’t respond. He smiled down at you, liking it much better that way. Instead of tormenting you further, he continued to fuck your mouth so you couldn’t get the chance to speak. You watched his face, in awe at the beauty of his expression. Although the scene was far from graceful, he managed to encase gracefulness despite the lack of it within the room. You felt the knot in your belly tighten to a point of no return, and without further warning, another orgasm washed over you. Your muscles tensed as your eyes squeezed shut, and your moans, although silenced, filled the room. Both boys were elated at your performance and were more than ready to move on to the main event.

Jake pulled back from you, letting out a sigh of discontent at the loss of the feeling. “Good to know that you can use your mouth for more than just back talk.” His voice was hoarse, strained by his own need for you. He was eager to fuck you, so much so that he wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait.

“You want him to fuck you now, baby?” Danny asked, mouth still hovering over your cunt. If he could have his way, he’d stay between your legs all night. If it were any normal day, he would have. Your eyes flickered towards him, unsure of how to answer. “It’s okay, you can say it.” His gruff tone made him seem more confident than he truly was; in fact, this was the part he had been dreading all night. Everything that had happened so far was fine, and he was more than willing to admit that he didn’t mind sharing you at all. In the previous context, at least. He’d been struggling with the idea of Jake fucking you, and he was nervous about the possibility of you enjoying it more than you enjoyed him.

“C-can…” you trailed off, looking between them both. You were anxious to speak, not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings. That was the last thing you wanted to do, especially after both of them being so good to you.

“It’s okay,” Jake said, joining in on the conversation. “Whatever you want.” You nodded, knowing that it was likely painful for him to say that. It was vicious, Jake’s need for control in the bedroom. You’d only been with him once, but you remembered it well. For Jake to take the lowest rung of the ladder and realize he had the least important opinion was likely very hard for him to comply with. But it didn’t seem like he had any disdain on his face, nor any trouble with accepting it. In truth, it didn’t bother him at all. He was just elated to be there.

“Can you fuck me?” You asked Danny, a hopeful gleam in your eye. His fear of being obsolete was diminished within a second, the question settling over him like a warm embrace.

“That’s what you want, sweet girl?” He crooned, fighting back a grin.

“Yes, please.” You assured him, the corner of your lips turning upward into a soft smile.

“We can do that,” Danny breathed, rising to his knees. “Come here.” He held his hand out for you. You took it, making a move to sit up. You shuffled to your knees and he immediately brought his hands to you, fingers dusting across your skin as he pulled you into a kiss. He was ecstatic at your question, but he didn’t have to say it for you to know. He was worried that you would rather fuck Jake, but the whole ordeal had only seemed to make you fall in love with him more. He was a phenomenal partner, one that loved with his entire heart and soul. You had nothing to ever complain or worry about with him, and the fact that he was willing to potentially risk his own comfort to give you something you wanted was something you could never expect from him. But, he had done it valiantly and with no hesitation, and he seemed to be enjoying it, too. Your guilty pleasure had opened your relationship to a whole new world of possibilities.

He pulled away, moving to the other side of the bed. “Come here,” he beckoned you towards him. You didn’t need instruction to know what he wanted from you. You kneeled in front of him with your back to him. You placed your palms on the edge of the bed, giddy with excitement. His hands took to your waist, and you looked up a Jake with a hopeful expression. The look alone could have sent him to his knees. “Are you going to be good for us, baby?” Danny asked, lining himself up with your entrance.

“Yes, daddy.” You were quick with a response, eager to continue. “So good, I promise.”

“That’s my girl,” his words came out in more of a growl. Jake took a step towards the bed, gently grabbing your face in his hands.

“You tap my leg if you want to stop.” His order was firm. “Even if you just want me to slow down. I want you to be comfortable.” His eyes showed heaps of concern as he spoke. You barely knew Jake to be caring, but perhaps in the years of lusting after you, he had grown quite fond of you. You thought it would be hard not to, even if you were a heartless creature. You wouldn’t describe Jake as heartless, but definitely careless. His affection was much different than a typical persons, but it was still phenomenal, nonetheless.

“Yes, sir.” The words sent a shiver down his spine, thrilled at the thought of fucking you again. He didn’t even care about penetration; he was more than content with the idea of your mouth for the rest of his life. Danny and Jake shared a look, both agreeing that they could continue. Without any further hesitation, Danny pushed himself into you. You let out a groan, already overwhelmed by the feeling. You didn’t have time to think much about it, because Jake had snaked his hand toward the back of your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair. He held your head in place as he brought his hips forward, resting the tip of his cock on your lips as he waited for you to open your mouth. You didn’t make him wait; your lips fell open, an invitation for him to continue as he pleased.

Danny started slow, his thrusts steady but not powerful. Jake was the same, both of them wanting you to get used to the feeling before pushing you any further. Their caution was endearing, but you were too far gone to care for it. You pushed yourself back on Danny, a silent show of your desire for more. A fire flashed in his eyes, the movement sending him into a state of ferocity. His grip on you tightened, and the power behind his hips increased. You let out a moan, the tip of his cock slamming against your cervix as he fucked you. The vibration from your moan sparked the same reaction in Jake. Both boys quickly realized that you were perfectly happy being used by them, and they were happy to utilize it. Jake held your head steady as he set a pace with his own hips, the first moment of sweetness quickly replaced by primal desire.

Jake hit the back of your throat, the feeling coming as a shock to you. Your throat constricted around him as you fought back a gag, but it only drove him further. Danny was lost in you, unable to find any more worry. He brought his hand up and landed it with a sharp smack on your ass. The lingering sting from the impact was irritating, but pleasurable all at once. Your fists were gripping the edge of the mattress, holding on tightly as you bounced back and fourth between the two. “Such a good little whore,” Jake hissed, his grip in your hair tightening further. “God, you take it so well.”

“Feel so fucking good, baby.” Danny agreed, the praise from both sides almost too much to bear. Danny reached around your waist, bringing his fingers to your already sensitive clit. He traced circles as he fucked into you, holding you firmly with his other hand so you could keep your balance. The speed at which Jake was thrusting into your mouth was almost too much to keep up with, but the beautiful sounds that he was singing were all the motivation you needed to keep up with him. Tears were stinging your eyes, falling and making a mess on your cheeks. Every so often, the urge to gag was too strong to hold back, but you persevered mostly because of the pleasure you were receiving from your boyfriend. Your skin was tingling with the threat of another climax. The release you needed was urgent, but you had no way to express it to him. Instead, you let out a slur of muffled noises in hopes that he would recognize the message.

Thankfully, Danny knew you well enough to recognize any message you were trying to convey; he could read you like a book, even in his sleep. “Cum for us, baby.” He demanded, but he was pleading with you. He couldn’t keep up the pace much longer either. His own orgasm was close, too. Jake was on the same page, noticing the state of both of you and recognizing it was similar to his own.

“Cum all over his cock, angel. Show him how good it feels.” Jake joined in on the fun of encouraging you. They had stopped viewing the night as a competition, and rather as a team effort. His words settled in your stomach like iron, the weight too heavy to withstand. He slowed his hips slightly, respectful enough to let Danny take over for a moment. Danny noticed his withdrawal, taking the opportunity to pull you back on him. As he did so, Jake pulled out of you entirely, wanting to give you two the moment of intimacy. Now, with the freedom of your voice, you let out a cry of pleasure. The moan tore through your chest, coating the walls like an obscene decoration.

“Fuck, Danny.” You croaked, unable to find the energy for anything more than that. Within seconds, you descended into another orgasm. Your limbs were trembling, threatening to give out from underneath you. Danny held you up, making sure you knew you were secure as you rode out the high. When the intensity began to fade, he slowly withdrew from you. His chest was heaving, but less from lack of oxygen and more from his carnal need for you. He caught eyes with Jake, sharing a silent thank you for his kindness in letting you two share each other for a moment.

“His turn, baby.” He spoke lowly, now understanding that he would be more than selfish to deprive Jake of an experience like that. His fear was satiated, no more anxiety about losing you or being forgotten. He was aware that there was never a need for the worry to begin with, but your performance and enjoyment spoke louder than any verbal reassurance. Jake looked to Danny as if he granted him the opportunity of a lifetime. Before anyone moved, Danny quickly glanced towards the table by your bedside. He moved towards it, rummaging through the drawer before finding a condom. He flashed it towards Jake, who reached for it with no hesitation. You were all under the same knowledge that Danny called the shots, and you were both more than willing to comply.

Jake slipped on the condom, immediately taking to you to help you stand. With his assistance, you steadied yourself on your feet. He guided your chin upwards and brought you into a kiss. Your hands landed on him, holding him to you in hopes the moment would never have to end. Years worth of pent up frustration and desire was all fizzling away to a dramatic end. When you had imagined the lifetime of torment to be over, you never thought it would be in such a fantastic way. No guilt, nor shame. It was the best possible outcome for a normally grievous situation. He parted from you, but ultimately leaned in for one more kiss. The temptation was too hard to resist. Once he managed to will himself away from you, he took a seat on the edge of the bed.

Danny moved to join you both, standing in front of you in anticipation for the next move. Jake guided you backwards towards him, slowly bringing you down to meet him on the bed. He lined himself up with you and used a hand on your shoulder to pull you down on him. Immediately, he let out a sigh of satisfaction. He had no way to express his gratitude for being granted the opportunity to have you again, so he opted to show you, instead. He used his hands on your hips to set a pace, prompting you to eventually take over. “That’s it, angel.” His mouth was just next to your ear, his breath tickling your neck. “Waited so fucking long for this.” He purred, happy when you continued to grind your hips down on him. “Be good for him, sweetheart. Treat him the same way you did for me.” He ordered, placing a kiss to your shoulder. “He’s been so good to you, letting you be a little slut. Thank him for it.” He let his teeth sink into the same spot his lips were kissing you.

The position was much more gentle than the last, allowing you to recover from the roughness. You looked up to Danny, giving him a smile that was all but sexual. It was your way of saying I love you without having to speak it. Your eyes told him all he needed to know. Danny brought his hand to your face, wiping away any tears still littering your skin. He gave you the same smile, both of you caught in a wordless conversation that was dripping with affection. Jake slipped his one of his hands to your front, fingers settling on your clit. He traced slow circles, causing a whimper to fall from your lips. His other hand came up to your throat, his fingers wrapping around it like a snake going in for a kill. You gave Danny a few innocent bats of your eyelashes, inviting him in with vulgar intent. You opened your mouth as Jake’s grip on your neck tightened. Danny moved forward, and you bent down slightly to meet him.

Danny let you set the pace, understanding that as bad as he wanted you, there was a lot of stimulation on you. You brought him into your mouth as you moved your hips on Jake. You took him as far as you could, feeling him slide down your throat. The pressure from Jake’s hand made it all the more pleasurable for Danny, the already constrained space becoming all the more apparent. Danny let out a groan as you bobbed your head down on him, gradually increasing your speed as you worked. Jakes fingers were working tirelessly at your clit, his own moans filling the air as you came down on him. He had his forehead rested on your back, eyes screwed shut in pleasure as he attempted focus his attention to his hands.

Jake shifted slightly underneath you, allowing him to reach a little deeper into you as you gyrated your hips. The new sensation caused a moan to tear through you. The vibration caused a stutter in Danny’s slow movements, the sensation almost bringing him to an orgasm. All three of you were desperate for a release, but both boys were aching for relief. As much as they loved pleasuring you, they were dangerously close to the edge. Your head was swimming, swirling with lack of blood-flow, which only made the pleasure all the more intense. Jake could feel you tense against him, your walls constructing around him, the feeling sending him into a frenzy. He let out a raspy moan, the sound shooting through you as motivation. You had never once imagined Jake could sound so desperate, so needy for someone or something. To know that it was for you was one of the best feelings in the world. His fingers tightened around your neck once more, the blood supply cut off completely. Danny took it upon himself to pick up his own pace, a slur of curses falling from his mouth at the tightness of your throat.

Without warning, another orgasm took hold, seizing every inch of your body. You wanted to cry out, to scream in response to the overwhelming amount of pleasure, but it was as if your brain short circuited. You couldn’t focus on a single thought; you were completely lost within both of them. Jake let out a growl, finding it near impossible to stop himself from orgasming at the sight of the state you were in. He held on just long enough for you to regain your mind, and he loosened his hold on your neck. Danny pulled back, also dangerously close to cumming. The two boys looked at each other, sharing one single coherent thought. They had no idea how they were going to end the night, and they weren’t sure if they even wanted to.

“What do you want, angel?” Jake said, holding your hips so you wouldn’t continue your movements. “How do you want us to finish?” Danny was appreciative that Jake asked, because they both knew it was in their best interest for you to decide. You lifted your head, a mess of spit decorating your chin and more tears prickling your eyes. You looked exhausted, barely able to hold yourself up, but you knew you wanted them to finish, and you knew exactly how to do it.

“I want…” you trailed off, taking a long inhale to slow the spinning in your head. “I want you both.” The boys shared a look, wide eyed and in shock at the idea.

“B-both of us?” Danny stuttered, unsure if he heard you right. “Like, to fuck you?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, unable to speak from the sheer excitement of the thought.

“Are you sure, trouble?” Jake’s comment proved that he had been yanked out of the cloud of sex, his rationality returning to him momentarily. “Don’t do it just because you think that’s what we want.”

“Im sure,” you nodded “that’s what I want.” A rush of excitement ran through both of them as they glanced at each other. Danny immediately went back to the night table, grabbing a bottle of lube from the drawer. With a small smirk on his lips, he tossed it to Jake.

“You heard her.” He said, knowing that you would never suggest it if you weren’t comfortable.

“Has she… I mean, have you?” Jake asked, still processing the request. Danny gave him a nod, answering any questions that he had with one swift motion. As if he wasn’t shocked enough, the thought settled in his bones like lead. After a few seconds, a smirk began to grow on his lips, too. “Kinky little thing,” he noted “sounds like I really missed out.” Danny’s apprehension of Jake’s smart comments had completely disappeared. This time, he found his words almost comedic. Jake helped you to your feet once more, immediately prompting you into Danny’s arms. “Guess we have to give the lady what she wants.”

Danny leaned down, placing a kiss to your lips. As he did so, he placed his hands on the back of your thighs and scooped you up as he straightened his back. You instinctively wrapped your legs around him, holding on to his arms for support. Jake moved closer, his chest pressing against your back. You leaned into him, accepting his presence with warm welcome. “I’m going to go slow, okay? Tell me if you’re uncomfortable.” He explained. You gave a nod, already aware of the process. After four years, you and Danny had grown quite experimental in the bedroom. The only shock was that it was somebody other than him doing it. Jake placed a few kisses to your exposed neck, starting his exploration with his hand. He started with his finger, slow and cautious in fear of making you uncomfortable. The feeling was new, something you didn’t experience all that often, but it was enjoyable. You let out a whimper, closing your eyes and eager for him to continue. Jake locked eyes with Danny, both sharing a silent agreement of comfortability.

With Jake’s support, Danny slipped his arms under your thighs as you leaned back into Jake. When Jake felt you were comfortable enough, he moved his hand to allow himself access to you. Danny used one hand to line himself up with your cunt, and Jake did the same with your ass. “Ready, baby?” Danny asked.

“Yeah,” you sighed. Danny moved first, slowly pushing inside of you. Jake was more hesitant, but gently brought his hips forward. When he didn’t hear a single utter of discomfort, he continued. When both boys were inside of you, you let out a sigh of relief at the feeling of fullness.

“This is what you wanted, angel?” Jake murmured, already victim to the pleasure. “You just wanted to be a whore for us? Let us have you however we wanted?”

“Yeah.” You gasped, pivoting your body slightly to wrap an arm around Jakes neck. Your other hand was holding Danny’s shoulder, keeping yourself anchored in place as they began to move.

“Is it everything you dreamed of, baby?” Danny asked, matching his movements with Jake’s. They weren’t moving fast, but they were pulling you down on them as they moved, increasing the pressure building in your belly.

“God, yes.” Your head fell back, lost in the feeling of both of them inside you.

“It feels so good, doesn’t it?” Jake growled, his fingers digging into your hips. “Tell us how good it feels.”

“S-so good.” You whined, squeezing your eyes shut. The feeling was transcendent, more powerful than anything you had ever experienced. “It feels so fucking good.” You couldn’t contain your moans any longer, every sound that was begging to come out did just that, painting the room with sin. It was pornographic, the scene absolutely vulgar, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. The obscenity was fantastic, and you never wanted to leave the moment. If you could, you would have stayed there and fucked them for the rest of your life, just like that.

Both of the boys had been teetering the line of their own orgasms for the entire night. They had no idea they would enjoy the evening as much as they did, and they too were dreading the inevitable end. As much as they wanted to climax, they weren’t willing to do so without one last orgasm from you. “Can you give us one more, sweetheart?” Jake hissed, picking up his pace. Danny followed suit, using his strength to pull you down on them.

“You can do it, baby. I know you can.” Danny encouraged you, hopeful that you could do as they were asking. Most of it was due to his need for you to be fulfilled, but some of it was because he was scared he couldn’t hold himself back any more. “You’ve been so good for us, just keep it up for a little bit longer.”

“So proud of you, angel. Doing such a good job. Taking it so fucking good.” The combined praise was exhilarating; you had never felt so appreciated by anyone in your entire life. “One more, beautiful. I know you have it in you.” Jake pleaded.

“Fuck!” You exploded, the word followed by a guttural scream of pleasure. You couldn’t bite back the sound; it tore through you with a ferocity you had never felt before. “I’m gonna,” you assured them, a long jumble of curses flowing from your mouth, following the statement. Jakes hands were burning into you, Danny’s grip on your thighs tightening even more. They aimed to keep their movements synchronized, not wanting to jeopardize your ability to climax. The muscles in your abdomen tensed, your grip on them growing stronger as the burning in your belly reached its peak. You let out a shriek of euphoria, every nerve in your body ablaze with the relentless pleasure. You felt like you were ascending to another dimension, completely unaware of anything other than the feeling of them inside you. Your body was exhausted, and your mind was, too. You were completely fucked out, and they knew that. Before you came down, they both let go, too.

The room was filled with filthy sounds, swearing and slurs of names. The climax was intense for everyone, nobody could comprehend the emotion of the high. You all floated back to reality together, sleep calling to you before the bliss even came to an end. Euphoric was not a strong enough word to describe the feeling lingering throughout your body. After a moment of rest, both boys carefully withdrew from you. You all shuffled to the bed, Danny laying you in the nest of pillows and blankets, his body radiating with an air of love. They shared a look, scared that they might have pushed you too far, but after a moment, a smile began to creep on to your lips.

“How was that, angel?” Jake asked, hand resting on your thigh as a loving decoration.

“It was… phenomenal.” You breathed, finally able to sort your thoughts. “Just… yeah. Phenomenal.” You reiterated your point. They both let out a chuckle, happy that you were content and feeling the same way. “So, did you guys just decide this at the bar? Friendly talk over a few beers?” Their light chuckles turned into full laughter at your question.

“Think the thought was bouncing around for a while. Time was finally right.” Danny said, collapsing beside you.

“Saw that look in your eye when I brought it up, earlier. Couldn’t really resist that.” Jake added, thumb brushing over the skin that was littered with finger shaped bruises.

“I don’t mean to sound greedy… but was that a one time thing, or…?” You trailed off, finally opening your eyes to look between the two. Jake looked to Danny, knowing that he had the ultimate say in the matter. After a moment of silence, Danny gave a shrug.

“Suppose we could try it again, sometime.” He smirked. “If it would make you happy. You know I’d do anything to make you happy.”

“I wouldn’t mind that.” You confessed, a smile breaking out on your lips. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” Jake said, adding a touch of humour to what would normally be an awkward moment. The aftermath should have been dripping with an uncomfortable nature, but it seemed perfectly right. There was no discomfort present at all. You rested your hand on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze. You reached your other one out to Danny, lacing your fingers together.

“I do think it’s bedtime, though.” You stated, feeling a yawn start to surface.

“Right, we did interrupt, didn’t we?” Danny asked.

“Glad you did.” You hummed.

“So, what now? Do I get to sleep in bed, too?” Jake joked.

“Not a chance.” Danny shook his head, paired with a laugh. “Sorry, man.”

“Have some hospitality,” Jake feigned offence, but his smile told the joke for him. “Couch?”

“Definitely.” You and Danny mumbled, already feeling sleep settle in your bones.

“Understood.” He stood, giving your leg a gentle squeeze. “Hope you’re not too sore in the morning, trouble.” He said before gathering his clothes and disappearing into the hallway. Once he was out of sight, Danny pulled you into his arms.

“I love you,” he mumbled.

“I love you.” You said, relaxing into his hold and resting your head on his chest. “More than anything.” You placed a gentle kiss to his chest. “Thank you, baby. I don’t even know how to tell you how fantastic you are.”

“Like I said, bug. Anything to make you happy.” And he meant it; if allowing you access to Jake every now and again meant that he could keep you happy and have you forever, he would. It was something he could learn to live with, because he knew deep down that Jake was just a guilty pleasure, and he was the love of your life.

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