#Dumbass in Love 🐇

[violaceous-veneration]

🐘🐪🦌🐇 for the poly ask game

🐘 How big is your polycule?

Four! Me, big brother, Licorice, and our Ivlis!

🐪 Who confessed first? How did it go?

I did! It... didn't go well. But I'm stubborn! So my Sun is mine now! I won them through my sheer capability to annoy and my irresistible charm! It's quite the fatal duo, you know. I don't really think the others have... well, Licorice has. But I'm not entirely sure my Sun understands that as a confession! So I just leave them be to figure it out, it's very entertaining that way.

🦌 Were they already in a relationship when you got with your FOs?

Nope! I'm actually pretty sure I was their first in all manners. It's a pretty nice feeling!

🐇 Any plans to have kids?

I have kids! I don't really see myself trying to have more, but we'll see what happens!

- 🐇 (hehe, we share bunnies...)

More below cut. Don't question it.

🐘 How big is your polycule?

Officially, three. If you ask Licorice? Four. He's obstinate. Don't ask him. I don't particularly want to share my lizard with another.

🐪 Who confessed first? How did it go?

Nicky did. To his little flame devil. It didn't go well, he came ranting to me about it numerous times. But Ivlis learned to love him, I suppose (if you ask me, learned it was okay to love him). I was dragged in by my own jealousy. Didn't mean to fall for the lizard, and I certainly wish I didn't, but even a god stumbles. I've never... really confessed. To either of them. Nicky knows I love him. I attempt to show the other. I do it better some days than others, but I hope they understand.

🦌 Were they already in a relationship when you got with your FOs?

With Nicky, yes. You could also argue with Licorice, as well, but as stated prior... I don't like sharing.

🐇 Any plans to have kids?

Absolutely not. We've got enough. Besides, I've got enough nieces and nephews for an entire fucking kingdom of its own, thanks to the bitch that fucks like a rabbit.

- 🍵

🐘 How big is your polycule?

Four.

🐪 Who confessed first? How did it go?

Me... me and Mother? I did. I have many times. I hope she knows. I'm never sure she does.

🦌 Were they already in a relationship when you got with your FOs?

... Yes. Much to my chagrin.

🐇 Any plans to have kids?

That would be wonderful! I'd love to have kids. I'm sure I'd be a much better father than that dumbass or my uncle. And a great husband, too! I'd be so attentive and I'd love them more than anything else!

- 🍭

[habitual-creatures]

I think it's going to rain soon. Do you like the rain?

I ENJOY IT. I'VE ALWAYS ENJOYED IT, I AM NOT SURE WHY...

...I would like it more if the changes in the weather didn't give me migraines...

(( ^^ Evan gets barometric pressure headaches... so he likes the appearance of storms, but he hates the way they make him feel. ))

[livealittleoc-cb]

Happy 25th Birthday Lust! [07.20]

🦊: It’s my birthday! Don’t ask about my outfit-. But…. LA anyone?~ I managed to convince Lucifer and Hades to let me out, I’ve always wanted to go to Los Angeles. Perfect birthday gift! I’m trying to convince Wrath or Greed to come with me while I pack. There’s an apple pie in the oven and everything feels just right. 🥰 It’s going to be a good B-Day!

⭐️: This didn’t post when it was supposed to post- Dumbass Tumblr

🩵🩵: @monsterhigh-cb [🐟🤍💍 && ⚡💙 && 👻💜 && 🐺💕 && 🎤💖 && 👑💛] @evicted-oc [☕️🤎 && 🐼🖤 && 🔦💛 && 🧊🩵 && 💄🖤 && 🏴‍☠️🤍] @theinvitation-bot [🐭🩶💒] @welcome-to-maniac [🐇🖤 💍 && 🌻❤️ && 🌕❤️‍🔥 && 🐿️❣️ && 🐉🩶] @fantasyaespa [🐈 💚💍 && ☀️🩵💍] @k-venturetime [🍓❣️] @multi-joong [🌧️🧡💍 && 🎨💚 && ☠️🖤] @kardpackcb [🌙💝 && 🐺❤️‍🔥] @obsession-cb [🍰🖤💍 && 🍪🖤] @byulhoundx [💃❤️‍🔥], @lunaaofthemoon [🌖💜]

possible new residents: @faywithlove @badbf-cb @folklore-cb @domxbot @welcometosector1 @reve-rv @multi-esme @the-hellhounds @oppositesattraxt @domrachaa @coffeexdreamcb @silcntxnight @moonlightchn @blogger-yura @thesugaredalchemists @doom-bc @redlight-cb @inferno-cb @darkloversxcb @shin-haneul @crimson-l @clubwnderland @reapermingi @dragonrider-cb @aotckimkai @mafia-parkseonghwa @wxlfchris @incubus-johnny @ursweetest-love @azrael-oc @songsoftheocean-oc @dream-cb @demigods-ateez @raiden-oc [DM + / -]

[softandsourcream]

Stop, you’re losing me~ - one

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Summary: The last time you saw Yoongi wasn't one of your fondest memories. And actually, you thought that after ten years you no longer had any more tears to shed for that memory, for that situation, for him.

What was the problem with meeting him again at his brother's wedding, right?

Right?

pairing: idol! yoongi x vet!f reader.

Words: 9k

genre(s): angst, hurt- comfort, slow burn, fluff, smut (+18) (not this one tho)

au(s): childhood friends - to lovers, idol yoongi, normal vet reader, entertainment industry, denial and resentment.

warnings: curse words, family drama, grief, loss of loved ones, panic/anxiety attacks, damaged mental health, a LOT of struggling. Yoongi is here to help tho♡.

author’s note: just wanna let you all now that I’m so exited that this is out now! Hope you enjoy it and if you have any suggestion just let me know! I don’t bite 🐇. Also, English it’s not my fist language, so please be patient with this dumbass

~

IMPORTANT: this fic contains a lot of sensitive topics touched upon explicitly. Please, if any of the tags trigger something in you, stop reading. You’re more important, and there is much more content you can consume here. Take care please! ♡

enjoy!

—————————•。・゜ one゜・__________________

main masterlist

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“Where are you?”

“Outside.” In fact, he had gotten out of the car a second ago, and he wasn't going to answer, but he didn't know where they were either; the place was exaggeratedly large.

“Get in here then, you're late.”

“I’m at the entrance... where are you?” His voice breathless, he ran a lot in less than 20 minutes.

“Your brother is about to faint, so you’re going to see us easily. The first row.”

Yoongi hung up the phone, and sure enough, it wasn't difficult for him to find his family right at the end of the place. His brother looked around restlessly, probably looking for him or his fiancée, because he knew he was late, but he didn't seem to have started yet either.

His father, on the other hand, observed his brother's concern with the empty gaze he had always had from his seat, blinking slowly without saying much. He smiled a little at the scene (also a little relieved to finally be there) and started walking quickly, straight there, without looking at anyone else.

He greeted some of his aunts from afar, bowed to others he didn't know but greeted him, and ended up meeting his brother's eyes, almost finishing his journey. The concern on his face changed to one of anger, and he approached him as if suddenly he wasn't about to get married and be responsible for a family. His posture was the same as when they played as children, and his mother had to separate them for a toy.

It gave him chills.

“Hel-“

“Where the fuck were you.”

Yoongi frowned exaggeratedly at the bad word, looking at his father, who was watching everything in the same exact spot with the exact same cold and calm eyes.

“You’re not going to say anything to him?”

He didn’t respond, and Yoongi chuckled when his brother insulted him again.

“Calm down, if mom hears you, she-“

“You’re half an hour late, Min.” Finally, his father, mad. He can tell just by his voice. Yoongi shrank from the scolding and grimaced, looking at his brother.

“I’m sorry.” One. Sooner than he expected “They didn’t let me go sooner.” Greum-Jae didn't even seem interested in hearing an excuse; Yoongi had never seen him so angry before. But he still dared to continue speaking. “I get you’re mad, and I’m sorry, but don’t be mad with me right now. This is your day, we can fight later, and I’m here. I’m really sorry, for real, it wasn't my intention to ruin this for you.”

“Now it’s my job to be calm?” Jae fled from his touch. “To ignore your mistakes? You literally have one job.”

“I know I- I don’t have any other excuse, okay? I’m really sorry.”

Two.

It was subtle, but after a moment, his gaze softened, and so did his body, which was the most noticeable. Jae hugged him, and Yoongi smiled sadly, because he did feel bad, but, of course, it wasn’t the time to show it.

“You’re lucky she’s late too, and that I’m in a good mood right now.” He knows. “Missed you…”

“Me too.” His smell, his hugs, his voice. His home. He missed. “You are in a good mood, though? You look like you're about to throw up.”

He hit his shoulder, breaking the hug and getting closer to his father. Yoongi says hi to him without receiving a response, of course. He looked older and tired, which made him think about how long he had not set foot in that city. He squeezed his fist, unsettled. “I’m nervous; of course I look like that.”

Yoongi was going to ask why, genuinely interested, because he didn't understand why he should be nervous. He wasn't supposed to do anything more than 'yes, I do' and be with the person he loves most for the rest of his life. He also understood that, from the context, Yoongi would never understand it, and he didn't feel like doing it either. Also, he shouldn't be that direct, so he swallowed his question and leaned with both hands on the empty chair next to his father, placing all his weight on his arms.

He wanted to ignore the fact that he felt watched. There were a lot of people there. He hadn't taken a look to see how much he knew and how much he didn't, that was an activity he would leave for when they were dancing and there was less light. Right now he knew that everyone was looking at him, and he didn't like it because, although it was a family and private event, he couldn't completely ignore it. Photos of him would still come to light. It was, in fact, one of the discussions he had with the company days before.

“Your brother doesn't want to hear you, but I do. What is more important than your brother’s wedding now?”

Shit.

Jae was now talking to someone who came to tell him news about Eun, and he had walked away. He could only hear the echo of people talking, laughing, and happiness. Yoongi didn't want to have that conversation right now.

“It wasn’t my fault.”

“That wasn’t my question.”

“You’re being unfair right now.”

The man sighed.

“I’m just asking, Yoongi." And his voice sounds different too, so Yoongi didn’t like it. “If I’m not right, why don’t you tell me? You know I know when you're right, and I'm not. I'm not stubborn, you're locking yourself in."

Yoongi wrinkled his nose because he was right in a way, and he hated that it was like that. It was true; he didn't know why he felt so cornered all of a sudden. Stretching his arms and looking at the ground, he became a little dizzy. His whole body suddenly hurt; maybe all the fatigue of those months came upon him.

“Working.” He was honest even so, knowing what was coming. His father didn’t move in any sense. “I was working, but it wasn't'more important than this’. They wouldn't let me go, for real.”

“You didn’t take a day off?”

“I can’t. I’m on tour right now, and I asked permission, but you know that they’re not flexible with the times.

“Just like your mother's birthday. Or every Christmas.” He sounds sad now, almost disappointed. Mad, but really sad. “We invite you, but you never come. Your brother was shaking yesterday. He really wanted to see you.”

There was silence. A big one, where you could still hear the murmurs of the people, the echo of the grandeur of the place, the clicking of heels, and the shy laughter. He gave them both time to realize where they were, that they were in suits, and that, after all, he hadn't seen that man in a long, long time.

Yoongi's apology stuck in his throat—another genuine apology.

 

A third.

 

“I'm sorry, son.” His father says instead. Yoongi had heard it a few times in his 30s. “I understand. We understand, but... we always do. Me, your mother, and your brother today. He has all the right to be mad; we all are, but you’re doing your best, and we’re getting old too.” This time he looked at him, smiling a little. Yoongi does too, but his was a sad one. “Just don’t forget about your family. I just hope I make it to your wedding too.”

“Pff.” They laughed, and the son nodded, his nose still wrinkled just thinking about it. “I can only do the first one, sorry. That’s why Jae did it first. Maybe I don't invite you to a wedding, but you have been sitting more than once watching me in a stadium with more people than here.” He looked at his brother with his eyes. He continued talking to that woman, nodding, biting his lip, having an awful time, and if it wasn't bad, then something questionable. Yoongi could swear his palms were sweating. “I honestly don't feel like... being that worried.”

His father looked nothing in the front, with a smirk on his face. Yoongi realized how old he turned again.

“You just haven't found the right person to be like this for.”

That doesn’t sound like his father. At all.

He looked at him again and couldn't say anything when his brother was already in front of them, smiling and wiping the sweat from his hands.

He knew it.

“She’s about to arrive, take your seat.”

Yoongi left the back of the chair where there was supposed to be another person there who wasn't there, and frowning, he looked around the room without really doing it, realizing that he was missing someone to greet.

“Where’s mom?”

And as if he hadn't been listening to laughter, murmurs, and voices of people for ten minutes that filled his ears non-stop, right after that question, a specific laugh seemed to answer his doubt, reversing his pressure and causing a strong shiver to run down the back of his neck.

He turned quickly, perhaps even a little disbelievingly, and then, he saw you.

Not his mother, though. Or yes, her too, but his eyes fell on you first because it was always like that, because that was your laugh, and because it was impossible not to.

Far away. The possibility of having heard your laughter was quite unlikely, even impossible. Seven or eight rows back. Of course, you were wearing baby blue, delicate, and tight. The fabric didn’t shine like your gloves do, and you had your long hair loose, tied up from the top just a little. You laughed heartily, teeth on display, his mother being the cause of your smile and your bright eyes. Such honest and grateful happiness, because why not, you both looked exaggeratedly happy to be in front of each other again. Her mother held your hands tightly, moving them up and down in time with her words, and you just nodded and responded briefly.

His heart stopped. He could swear he had even forgotten to breathe.

Yoongi didn't enjoy eye contact.

He usually runs away from it. He feels stupid, and he gets embarrassed quickly. It's a tense situation for him, but he was wishing with all his might that you two had it at that moment. That his eyes were heavy enough for you to turn to look at him and take a good look at you because your eyes had always been big and expressive, and he needed to confirm that he wasn't hallucinating.

At least that's what they were like the last time he saw them, so many years ago that he couldn't count them, and from what he saw from there, many things had changed.

You look breathtaking. You've always looked this pretty, but right now… 

He didn't know if it was because he hadn't seen you in person for many years, up close, but unpleasant things were happening to him. His legs trembled when you finally looked back. Big eyes, make-up on, pretty color, and they opened, your moves frozen, and somehow, you two had an extremely uncomfortable visual conversation, as if you were face to face, and you didn't know what to say.

To his surprise, your gaze quickly changes to a more confident, almost cold look, and you bow with extreme lightness to say hello without intending to break contact. However, his mother did, hugging goodbye to you as soon as everyone started tidying up, music started playing, and Yoongi was forced to sit down, trembling, sweating, and unfocused, remembering how you looked.

He was there again, in real life, in Daegu, where he was born and grew up, where it was hot and dangerous to go out at night, where they used to live, and where he used to get lost when he could.

He had arrived that morning, but his brother, his parents, and you brought him back home.

“Shit.”

Not in a comfy, lullaby way. More like a cold water falling from the sky directly on the ground/ type of way.

He was there. You were there, feeling better than him, of course, but you don’t know. You had the whole month to mentally prepare for that reunion. Obviously you had a better handle on it, but you were also shaking, and you had to take a couple of breaths before you were ready for the wedding.

“Good?”

 

Seun was next to Greum when everything happened, in a way waiting as a spectator. Both in silence, from afar. Now he was waiting for you to respond, so he could start the recording in case you said something compromising. Both of you were in your assigned seats, with Jae at the altar.

“If it’s better than him, then yes, I’m great.” He laughed and checked at the entrance in case Eun was peeking out. He wanted to see her dress. You shake your shoulders, trying not to look in his direction again, releasing tension.

“Well, I don’t judge him. Jae didn’t tell him you were here.”

You scoff, “He didn’t? We're some show to you two or something?” putting your brother's arm away (with more force than necessary. It bothers you that he didn't take seriously how you felt. More now that you were especially sensitive) so you can record properly. The music began to overwhelm you a bit.

Now. Suddenly they were all in order, therefore quieter, so you two had to continue the conversation in whispers. Jae was waiting for his future wife; the doors of the place were open, but nothing was happening yet.

“He told me months ago that he wasn’t sure if he would arrive. The invitation was made, but he hasn't seen him for almost a year. When-“ he stops, unlocking his phone that had turned off for not pressing record yet, making you smile. Your older brother reminded you a lot of your father sometimes, and you rarely saw him so excited and well groomed at the same time. Your dress color and his suit matched too. His idea. “When Yoongi confirmed he was coming, Jae didn’t have the time to tell him. So yeah,” you looked at him when he did, blinking. “I know he’s feeling a lot of things right now.”

Well, that was weird.

That doesn’t sound like Yoongi, Yoongi loves his brother, his family, at least the one you know.

The type of relationship you had now (null) didn't allow you to say that out loud, and, strictly speaking, you didn't understand his reaction either. He looked genuinely surprised; it shouldn't affect him if he was the one who broke everything in the first place. You assumed it had just been the surprise, and it would take you a good stretch of the night to be able to let go of the fact that they were there, so close but so far, to let go of the possibilities of talking, hugging him, and telling him how much you had missed him, know about him, how he handled things. Just as before. Because it didn't help you to think like that, and because how pretty and beautiful your best friend looked right now, happy, in white, and excited, couldn't be placed on anything else.

You hoped you could breathe in peace for the rest of the night. Although at some point you thought you could do it without problems, because once you wiped away the tears that came out of you when you saw Eun enter and the ceremony took place, between your brother talking to you, you were laughing at him because he had also cried halfway through. On the way, the rest of your family arrived, and an inexplicable happiness that ran through you as you were surrounded by so many people that you knew and hadn't seen in years consumed you, your head stayed busy. A lot, and you still had it in mind, but you were not alone, and that made you feel good, safe, and a little calmer.

It was easy for you not to give him your night. At least the first part of it.

Apparently, after the ceremony, the party, and celebration would take place in the same place. You weren't really surprised, in fact, it moved you even more because the place was gigantic, very tall, and beautiful, almost like a theater, and there were many, many people, enough to fill the place. Not in a suffocating way, but enough to get lost. It was mostly of age, older people, maybe grandparents you hadn't managed to meet before, and then there were people directly younger, but you knew those, Seun was a people butterfly. Friends of theirs, you assumed. Actually, Seun stopped explaining who the boy was sitting next to one of her good friends when a man, tall and good-looking, started to talk on a microphone.

“Now, now, and congratulating the bride and groom once again, we would like to call the loved ones of both to say a few words before the fun part starts.

Everyone laughed, and Seun looked at you. You forgot about that part.

“Let’s start with the parents…”

“I can go for you instead.”

“It’s okay.” You smile. You knew that he was doing his best to be able to contain you, and give you the best company, despite the fact that it was not easy for him. “I’m not made of glass.” You joke, listening to Eun’s mother speak already.

And well, for him, you were. At least right now, but he didn’t say it, scoffing to hide his thoughts. “I’m trying to be good. Dad it’s watching now, I have to be an example.”

“For what.”

“Shut up, don’t be disrespectful.”

You try not to laugh. He was nervous now. You never understood why it was so difficult for him to admit that he cared for others. Not even with Jae he dared to do it, or at least that's what you thought. You didn't know how he would tell the truth in his speech.

You were the last one. You knew this because when you arrived, Jae told you. Eun wasn't supposed to know you were there. Of course, she had invited you, but she didn't know if you would finally attend because you hadn't been able to communicate with anyone these last few months. You met once, when she came to see you at your house, but you couldn't talk about much. You were on another planet, it was like your head was disconnected from your body most of the time, and she assumed you wouldn't go. 

You wanted to think that she hadn't seen you when she passed, but you doubted it. With the amount of people there, and with how focused she was on Jae, it was impossible.

Still, you were nervous. When you accepted, you didn't think you would be in front of so many people. Your heart was beating.

“Is that Yoongi?” Nara, your sister, asked your mother just behind you when he got position and greeted everyone.

“Yeah. Why he wouldn't?” Your mom responded a bit confused. You could hear her smile.

“I think you all were joking when you told me he was on BTS, for real. It doesn’t look at all like the Yoongi I knew.” You hear a laugh, a gentile one, and then your other brother making fun of her behind. Your dad scolds them.

Now, you take advantage of the moment to take a better look at him.

You wanted to blame it on the fact that your sister was only nine when she met Yoongi, and every time he appeared on TV or in videos she was told it was him, she just couldn't believe it. You just hoped those were her blurry memories of him, because you couldn't see him too differently from how you remembered it.

Maybe his hair was longer, he was paler, taller, his back had grown considerably, and he had that special glow that any celebrity would have. He looked like an entire adult now, too. He wore expensive clothes and good shoes, although he didn't seem to have put any effort into his hair, or his appearance in general, he looked incredibly unreal, so much that it makes you angry.

If you thought about it enough, and if you didn't know it was him, you would’ve struggled to recognize him too. You often saw him in magazines, posters, on buildings in Busan, on train pamphlets, on your cell phone and even in medicine, but seeing him in person was overwhelming. It was like seeing a stranger you already knew, but better yet, he was there, but at the same time he wasn't.

You take a deep breath when you realize that, despite all those things, his features were still just as soft and delicate, just like his mother's.

His knuckles still turned red without much effort, and he smiled the same way, making that slight pout with his lips before crying, trying to contain it, and he wiped the tears carelessly. You found your Yoongi in the one you were looking at right now, with little things, with gestures, with details that you used to admire more than necessary, they were still there.

and it made you feel nauseous.

You blinked a few times, snapping out of your trance as everyone applauded, and realized you hadn't heard a single word. He had even cried, and you didn't know why. You saw Jae stand up as he was called to take position on the small stage, and a much louder round of applause made you jump lightly. They came from behind, just that young section that assumed they were friends of both. There were a lot of people, and it didn't surprise you that Seun was already fooling around on his way to the small stage there.

“How are you feeling, blossom?"

Your father asked, taking advantage of the fact that you turned around to look at the crowd and that your brother was not there. They were both looking at you, and the rest of your brothers were talking among themselves.

“I'm okay.” It wasn't necessarily a lie. You felt just as bad as you do every day. Besides, you knew that they were referring to something more specific (Min Yoongi) than to your general emotional state, so you smiled slightly, closed, and placed your hand on your mother's, who was on your arm. “I’m good; don’t worry.”

As you predicted, Seun's speech was so unserious and absurd that it's not worth dwelling on. For some reason, everyone was laughing with him, he had livened up the atmosphere and unintentionally infected everyone with joy.

He soon returned to his seat and sat still with applause in the background. You couldn't believe it.

“I don’t get why he’s still your friend.”

“We’re in love, sister.” He asure. “This wedding is for three people. They will never get rid of me.”

“Shut up.”

“Now.” The good-looking man says “Briefly before eating and doing fun things, we have one more person who wants to wish you both the best, of course.”

You can see Eun’s confused look at her husband now, and he quickly grabs her hand. Your heart was ricing, you felt your mother's hand on your shoulder.

“Park ___, please."

Eun almost jumped from her seat, looking around, looking for you. You also saw someone else look for you in the crowd when you were getting up a little stiff because of your dress. You say sorry to an old woman right in front of you, who you accidentally hit softly because Seun didn’t move at the right moment.

“Oh my god.”

You didn't have time to get halfway down the hall to the front when a large white dress ran towards you to hug you. You smiled at the impact because you were a little taken aback by how strong it came and how big her dress was. You smiled when you already had her in your arms.

“You have been here all this time?”

“Of carouse.”

“Oh my god, thank you…” she softly says, hugging you even harder.

“I wouldn’t miss the happiest moment of your life.”

Because it had cost you, but you had arrived. Was she crying? Thank goodness people were still clapping because of the moving nature of the situation, and they couldn't hear you. You were trying so hard not to cry too.

If you did it, you wouldn't stop.

“I know you-“

“It’s okay.” You stopped her. “I’m okay.”

You squeezed her waist as a signal for you to start moving, and she moved away from you to caress your face lovingly and look at you like... most people have looked at you lately with pity and kissed your forehead.

Pity.

 

She took your hand, and the entire way, you could feel Yoongi's gaze on you. From the moment she hugged you until she kissed you and started leading you forward, like an exhibition, heavy, right next to you. He made you feel small, it was silly.

“Now stop crying; I haven't said anything yet.” You start, with the microphone in your hands, making everybody laugh, the couple too, Jae helping her with the tears. The place was in silence, the lights, the eyes, and the attention were just on you. So you take a deep breath and unfold the paper you’ve got prepared. “I- uh~” a sigh. “I don’t know how people do this without crying, I- okay.” You were nervous, but the place laughed again, so it gave you time to breathe.

“I still remember you both being taller than me, smarter than me, and older than me. I know that deep down all of you were so done of me, right behind there too,” all those people scream from behind, and you laugh. “because I used to talk a lot, and I carry my toys everywhere, so I can show it to all of you, and I made too many questions for people who are starting to be teenagers and want to look cool, but I wasn’t. I didn’t even care, I remember that. I was the pain in the ass that comes with Seun. Just a plus because Seun it’s a bother himself.” The aforementioned rolled his eyes, and you waited for there to be silence so you could continue. “I understand that now, and I just came here to apologize.” 

The atmosphere after the laughter was now a little solemn, and in contrast to your brother, you were capable of poisoning the things you touched, and those who knew you knew that. You could see the newlyweds were a little worried, but you kept smiling, giving them confidence that nothing bad was going to happen. At least that wasn't your intention.

“Sorry for being the impediment for you to go out late at night or for having to return early from wherever we were... I- was with you.” Uh. You try to keep the smile. Shit, “sorry for being so annoying, and sorry for the fact that I didn't care. Because as much as I didn't like being with you sometimes, the best part of my day was watching you eat at my table, or Mrs. Min organizing my birthdays, and everyone coming with gifts that I genuinely liked because you all heard what I was saying even if I was giving you a headache.”

Unintentionally, you met those eyes again from afar, just when you were trying to control that lump in your throat because the worst part was coming, and you didn't know if you were ready. You said the following while still looking at Yoongi, not at you, surprisingly. “I miss it. I really do, and I’m so grateful that I carry all that with me.”

You look at the paper, change the page, and breathe. So you try once “I-“ and twice. “I- um…” a shaking breath sounds everywhere, reading the words, but you just can’t. “Sorry~” you're softly trying to laugh as you cry start, and you feel so stupid for breaking in front of a lot of people. No because it was bad, everybody there cried before you, but not because of the same thing.

“I love you!” You didn’t know who it was, but you smiled and responded with a really quiet and shaking'me too', giving you time to breathe as everybody laughed, and the atmosphere eased.

“Okay.” You say more to yourself, but you have a mic on your mouth, of course. “I didn’t write this part alone. Kija he… he is my twin, so of course he was with me in all of this story, but when he got sick and we were writing this months ago, he told me that I didn’t mention him in all this because it was going to be about me, not him… he’s kinda dumb.” 

You laugh, trying not to tear up. You were holding the next tears, but like, fighting demons and everything to not cry. You, for real, didn’t want to cry in front of all those people. Your voice was obviously trapped in your chest, and it was shaking, but you couldn't do anything but breathe. You just have to be quick. 

“But he told me that he wanted to tell you both that he and I were very proud to have seen you grow together, hate each other together, and deny that you liked each other together and today, for me, seeing you two married means a lot. I adore you two with all my heart. Congratulations, and I know you’re going to do a great job. I'm sure Kija would have done a better job telling him in person, but I'm here for him, so you know. He would- have loved to come, I have no doubt. Be happy, please, and no babies yet; I’m not ready.”

You didn’t remember anything after that, which means two things:

One, you need to calm down because two, you weren’t fine.

You remember the hug, and a few words both of them told you, and all the looks people gave you just after that, full of sadness and compassion (which was the first thing that made you want to run away). And at the party, you dance because you enjoy it, and you feel a little better, but people stop you all the time to give you their condolences because “they didn’t know”.

The cake was cut, the presentation was done, and you could only come back to the moment when you had your first drink of whiskey, and your body told you that it wasn’t a good idea. Your heart was fast in your chest, that would only make it worse with alcohol.

You need to breathe.

 

“Sorry, what?!”

 

You scream behind the music. Some girl named Hwan stopped you. (It came right at the beginning, when Seun was next to you, and you were pretending to listen to how she had recently graduated. Poor girl, honestly, she looks kind and lovely.) with two glasses of tequila and some salt in her hand. 

“My friend!” She said. “I lost him, so take this!”

 And then:

“Hurry! I have to go for more before they run out!” You were too agitated for this. This is a bad idea ___. “c’mon c’mon honey!”

Your hands were tingling, your breathing was short, and you were afraid. You had tried to go to the bathroom, but it was full, and it was even more claustrophobic than all those people. Right next to it, there were some stairs that you assumed went up to the balconies that surrounded the place. You were very grateful that it was high, enough to encapsulate the music on the floor below, and you heard it as if you were listening from a glass.

Or was it you? 

You leaned on the railing and began to sweat. You closed your eyes, trying to calm down little by little, to look for things to think about, to feel something other than fear and anguish at the same time, but it was impossible, completely, and that made you even more desperate. You were breathing as if you had just run for two hours non-stop, and there came a point where your legs couldn't support your body. You couldn't feel your hands, cried a lot, trying to catch air, moaned in terror.

“please please please… stop just-“

You were trying not to faint, you were on the edge of a high place, and it was now dark for those below. It was when you felt like you really couldn't do anything. That you tried to stand back in case your body gave way forward, and it wasn't more dangerous when you felt hands on your stomach directly and the warmth of a body behind you.

A warm feeling that felt like burning on a straight fire

“Easy~ here,” you heard, far away from you, just like the music in a glass. The only thing that told you that he was literally glued to you was his touch. “Can you feel my hand?” You didn't respond, trying to run away. You didn’t want to be touched. “Hey, it’s okay, you’re safe. If you want to feel better, you have to answer me, okay?”

“Hmm” a moan full of pain, was not even an answer.

“Okay?” They asked again. This time you nodded and felt the hand move on your stomach, the fingers more than anything, like playing a piano. Soft, but rough at the same time. “Can you feel it?” Your two hands were placed on his in an attempt to find support; you couldn't feel your legs, and after giving him an affirmative answer with your head, you complained again, your head was about to explode. “Move my hand with your stomach as you breathe.” And you did. Erratic and desperate “That’s good, but try it slower. Focus on moving it, not on breathing.”

“I- I ca-“

"Yes, you can. You do it every day; come on.”

You know, you just didn’t want to be there.

You try your best to move his hand. It was hard because you were sobbing, and trying your best to not think too much. So you closed your eyes, exhausted, and concentrated on the warmth that the stranger was giving you and the hold that, while at first it felt overwhelming and suffocating, now it helped. You felt stronger, even though you were about to faint.

So you moved the hand, and it worked.

“Good~ breathe.”

The air filled your lungs little by little, your head began to quiet, and the music entered your ears at a decent volume considering how far you were from the ground. Your hands were cold, they were shaking, but you could move them, and you still couldn't feel your legs, but you could hear the trembling of your breathing and how your nervous system was trying to regulate itself, blocking your crying in your chest.

You were exhausted, god, you would sleep there if you could.

“Better?”

And then you realize.

 

You know that voice.

 

It was soft, deep, and in your ear. So close that if you turned to see him, both of you would collide. His hands were bigger than they used to be and softer to the touch, pale on your baby blue dress, no scrapes like you used to heal, he’s no longer biting his nails.

‘Shit’

“Don’t touch me.” You said. He tense.

“If I let you go, you will fall. You're not even holding yourself up.”

He was right. And you hate it.

“What are you doing here.”

Your voice sounded agitated, almost like a whisper. You still didn't dare open your eyes; your eyelids were heavy, and the fear of facing him so close made you delirious. Even though you had your back turned to him, you felt him snort.

“God. You’re welcome?” You clung tighter to his hand. It's just that you got dizzy, and he held you when he felt you give way to the left. “I should ask that. You almost passed out on the railing, idiot, that's… fucked up.”

He calls you an idiot? You were too weak to call him something worse.

So you only say "sorry." Instead, letting him go finally, and you tried to stand up by yourself, but you wobbled

“Okay, okay, please don’t. I’m gonna…” His hands took place on your hips to guide you to some chairs in the corner, which you didn't see at first, of course. You weren't sure if his touch hurt more now that you were more conscious or before, when you were overstimulated. Felt the same, honestly. “Be careful, they look old.” You walked as he commanded, and once you sat down, you heard him say something you couldn't decipher. You finally opened your eyes to ask, but there was no sign of anyone.

Sighing, you rested your head in your hands and closed your eyes again. You didn't know if you were still dizzy and weak or if you felt that way because you were already drunk. They both make sense to you.

You heard noise after a few seconds and looked up. Finally, Yoongi's silhouette appeared in the hallway, he had things in his hands, and he was looking at the glass of water, concentrating so that nothing would fall on the floor.

“I’m definitely too drunk for this.”

This can't be happening to you. Could not.

“I put ice on it, so you can chew. It will help.”

His voice sounded unfriendly to what he was saying. Not angry or indifferent, but rather nervous and tense, as if he were speaking by opening his mouth a little, trying to make you believe that it was no a big deal, as always, but his nervousness didn't allow him to fool you. You raised your eyes to look at his, and he turned them away once you brought them together. You tried to hide a smile as you received the glass. Of course, he couldn't look you in the eyes. He cleared his throat, finally watching you receive the water, trembling in your hold. He tries to hold it from below in case you drop it.

You took a sip.

“Your makeup is smudged.”

Of course. You must have been looking stupid.

“What is that?"

He was offering you something, like toilet paper, but softer on a package. You couldn't see very well, it was just white.

“I’m not really sure.” He confesses. “I take them from the bathroom. They’re damp.”

You touch it with two of your fingers, just to not be rude, honestly.

“Thanks, but I can’t really see myself here.” There was no mirror, and if there was, it was dark. The only lights there were those on the dance floor, which were colored and did not shine directly on the place you two were having this... moment. “I don’t really care though, I’m living soon anyway”

He didn't insist, putting the package in his pocket. You maintained a silence that would have been more awkward if the music downstairs wasn't on, and if you didn't have anything to chew at that moment. Neither of you dared to look at each other, or start a conversation because it wasn't even enough for something cordial. You didn't have the strength to get up and run away, but just when you were going to tell him that you were okay, and he could leave, he took something out of his pocket.

Now you are invested.

“You mind if I smoke?”

You looked at him from there, taking time to process the information. You shook your head slightly, maybe even confused, but there was no point in being.

“Can you even smoke here?”

The place was big but closed, you didn't know if it was allowed.

“I doubt it.”

“Since when do you smoke?” You dared to ask.

“I don’t.”

No, because he hates the smell. His mother has smoked since ever. Yoongi hates that the smell gets stuck in everything and everywhere. No matter how much his mother smoked outside the house, he always ended up with his school clothes smelling like cigarettes. It was inevitable. He always complained.

There you were watching him right now, right in profile, blowing smoke from his cigarette as if he did it every day, even though he said he doesn't. Arms resting on the railing, well-dressed, looking anywhere but at you.

You wanted to stop assuming that this Yoongi was the same one who had left years ago. Because you didn't know, you were both two completely new people, total strangers who knew nothing about each other, yet, you wanted to think that, if that were the case, he would have already left. He usually walks away from what he doesn't care about or doesn't like, that's what he did with you when he left, because that's how you felt. It was nice to believe that he was now there himself because he wanted to be, but it didn't help you to think about it, not now. Just because he was there didn't mean he was back in your life, and as silly as it sounded, your brain didn't understand that. It was your job to stop him from believing something like that.

You chew ice.

“I don’t want to ruin the party for you. Go ahead.” Your voice is still dumb. He was watching the people dancing from there, now he was looking at you, smoking the cigarette between his fingers without understanding what you meant. “I’m feeling better, you can go.”

“Okay.” He directed his body directly towards you. Unintentionally intimidating. “Do you want me to go?”

His presence made you anxious.

“Yes. But if I’m honest, I don’t really want to be alone right now.” He hums. “But I have seven siblings, and all of them are downstairs right now. I can call any of them.”

“They will scold you for not saying anything and me for not seeking help.”

“I know.” He looked at you, quietly. “I just don’t want to... keep you here. Have some fun.”

He shook his head, looking away.

“It’s okay. I was here first, drinking. Then you came. You scared me.”

You blink a few times. “You’ve spent all the night in here?”

“Most of it.” You followed his eyes down on the first floor, full of people. You could see everything from there. If you focused on one person, you could easily track them. “Enough to watch you dance and get drunk.”

“Creep.” He smiles a little.

“That’s why I wasn’t sure it was you. I went to get my whiskey, and I swear I saw you two minutes before taking a shot of tequila. I thought you were just drunk.”

You frowned, settling into the couch. You felt genuinely bad.

“Now I’m scared. For real.”

“Not intentional. I can literally watch my brother kiss Eun from here every five minutes, even if I don’t want to.” Yoongi plays with his ice, then drinks the rest in one go.

You gulped.

Thinking about it more was counterproductive for your mental health, you knew it, you understood it, it was practically self-sabotage, but right now, you gave yourself perhaps ten seconds to admire the beauty that Min Yoongi carried all by himself.

He looked so different, and everything that had changed elevated his beauty to places... god. You had met at a very young age too, in years, you could also say that you had changed enough to be mentioned at some point by a family member who hadn't seen you in a while, for example. You are an adult now, but it was impressive.

To think that you stopped seeing Yoongi right when he was being built into an idol says a lot. Everything about him looked expensive and well cared for, his soft hair, smooth skin, long eyelashes, immaculate hands, as if they were not obliged to do anything that would harm them. How his throat moved as the drink passed into his system, the lack of reaction of his features despite being strong, and having drunk almost half of the short glass.

The feeling that rose to your stomach made you come back, and from well-being, it turned into discomfort in your chest. He was there, he looked so attractive, and you couldn't do anything.

You couldn’t hug him, tell him how much you missed him and hit him nonstop because even when you’re still so into him, you were hurt too, and this situation was so out of your hands.

“I’d liked your speech. It was good.”

You wanted to tell him that you hadn't done it alone, but why would you do that? You didn't answer.

“You’re still writing?”

This time, you denied it almost instinctively. The truth is, you didn't want to give additional information to, in a way, a stranger, but you had already screwed up. “No. A long time ago I-“ stopped when you left, but of course you kept quiet.

When it was about Yoongi and whether you thought about the young you who loved that person in front of you so much and how dependent you were on someone who didn't care how you felt, it made you feel so stupid. And it didn't really make sense because you were young and inexperienced, and you had an important bond, so of course you will be hurt, you had more compassion than resentment. But still,

“-just don’t do it anymore.”

You didn't want to feel that weak again. He nodded.

“Why haven't you left if you don't want to be here?” You changed the topic. You weren't looking at him, but you felt his attention return to you, and he responded with his silence, then you looked up, and he avoided you again. “You're still not a party guy?” He didn't respond again, knowing that you knew the answer, so you smiled. “Yeah, you weren't either back then.” You say that just for yourself.

“I want to, though. Hyung it’s happy, and I haven't seen my family in a long time. My dad told me he was waiting for my wedding too. I stayed so maybe the event convinced me.”

“Your dad?” He nodded in disbelief as well. “That doesn’t sound like your dad. And also, the event?” A snort left your mouth as he looked at you, nodding. “ I don’t think it’s just about the event, you know?”

“Yeah. He told me that too.”

You laughed this time. You like that men.

“That doesn’t sound like him either.”

“I know.”

You missed Yoongi’s parents. They were so different from yours.

“You were, I remember.”

“What.”

“A party person. I always went with you and watched you dance because I didn't like it. Then we would leave late and buy ice cream at the convenience store downtown because you always craved some.” You nodded, trying to manage the pain that the memory caused you. “I've never seen you cry in one before.”

You played with the ice that was left, because the question was not directly a question, it was more of a mention, perhaps so as not to ignore what just happened. He knew you wouldn't answer and that you shouldn't either. You wrinkled your nose, uncomfortable.

“Where do you learn all of it?”

 

Containment, you meant.

 

“Hm.” He took a second. “These ten years have been interesting.” A laugh, and you try your best again. “I saw a member of our staff do it to Jungkook once, the first time. We were very young, but I’ve never forgotten it in case it happened again. It happened a couple of times after that, so I… know.”

And it's as if the anguish you had come back to you once you touched where his hands were for the first time in 10 years, and you had to close your eyes just because you felt upset. You didn't want to be there, you remembered. Not only because you didn't want to see him, but because you didn't feel well, and you put him over your emotions again.

Fucking hell.

“Your brother it’s looking for you.” You nodded, opening your eyes slightly.

“Of course he is…” you murmured, overwhelmed, trying to stand up. But you were feeling bad again, so you waited a little.

“Do you want me to-“

“No.”

You didn't know why you were so angry all of a sudden. Your heart was beating again, you started to feel warm even though the place was quite cold because of how big it was, and you were actually grateful that they cared about you, but you had spent all those months feeling like a burden to others.

You tried not to cause too many problems, you didn't want that kind of attention, especially after having been living alone, away from your family for so long, to live with them again. You went from making your own food to your mother having to sit next to you so you could eat something. From leaving early to work to not even knowing what time it was. From calling them to tell them good things, to having to pretend to sleep so as not to receive questions you didn't want to answer. You couldn't take care of yourself, it was something that you were having a hard time facing, because you wanted to do it, to be well so as not to be the burden of your family, but the pain you had was still just as big, and heavy, and it enveloped your entire chest. Squeezing. It didn't let you swallow, speak, cry, or breathe.

You were crying again. This time in silence, you didn't care that Yoongi was watching you in silence too, not knowing what to do.

"Where's the… dump thing you bought.”

He reacted a little slowly but quickly, searching for it, taking it out of his jacket pocket. You nodded.

“Can you clean my face, please? I don’t want to look like this when he finds me, and he will if I go to the bathroom right now.”

That one seemed to get him out of somewhere, because it did take him longer to process the information. He was standing with the towels in his hand and blinking, almost like a cat, a confused one. He didn't say anything, and you didn't think you had said anything wrong, so you got scared, and you wondered if maybe you, in fact, said something wrong.

“I can try, though. You don’t-“

“I’ll do it.”

He sits on the coffee table in front of you. You can smell his strong and manly cologne, and if you raised your eyes to his face enough, you could see him up close, closer than you had for many years again. Older, smelling that way, his marked features but you didn't. Of course not.

You close your eyes.

The two of you were silent, and it took you a few minutes to begin to feel the softness with which he ran over your face, the left side of your cheek, extremely light, almost afraid to touch you. You opened your eyes, and he wasn't looking where he was supposed to clean.

He looked at your face, carefully, perhaps making sure it was really you who was in front of him. He stopped his hand when your eyes connected, and it lasted only a few seconds, but you felt so much tension that you even doubted if it was wrong for you to pretend as if you didn't have things to talk about, before having any kind of contact. Whatever it was.

After that, he looked at you with pity.

The last one that night, you decide.

“Don’t look at me like that.”

You were stronger than him when it came to holding a gaze. He has always been the first to escape, which is why your gaze was very intense, heavy, and powerful. You could do it because you felt it was the most honest way to know if someone could handle you.

“Sorry.”

Yoongi had never been able to look at you for more than five seconds.

He resumed his work with the same smoothness. The music returned to your ears, and you returned to your place, to your life, to the now and to how your body was screaming to get out of there. You closed your eyes, chest tight and hands tense, trying to control their shaking.

You have bigger things to cry about right now than this. You had done it for a long time now; you had no more tears to cry for Min Yoongi, no reason to be nervous anymore, and no reason why you couldn't live in peace anymore.

“I’m sorry about Kija.” His voice was smooth, almost lullaby. He sounds nervous too, and just because of that, your response was also automatic. If it had been genuine, you would have had another panic attack right there.

 

“It’s okay.”

 

‘You are grieving. Don't expect anything better. Let us help you’

 

They were all grieving too.

 

“And I’m sorry I wasn’t- I didn’t know.”

There. Was there when you wanted to scream and punch him so hard enough to make him feel guilty.

“What do you mean.” To be honest, it doesn't even surprise you. You sensed it, but you had the small hope that he saw it… at least. “I texted you. Jae- he give me your number. I was waiting for you at his funeral.”

“Y/N…”

“It’s okay.”

 

You said instead. Yoongi looked terrified.

 

“I-“ he cut himself. “…was-“

You take his hand softly, stopping him. “It’s okay, Yoongi.”

“Wait.” One of his hands is on your wrist, preventing you from getting up. You didn't feel good, but you would do anything to get out of there. Still, you sat back down because you didn’t expect it.

“I’m sorry.”

 

Three.

 

The only thing you could hear was your heart beating; everything went quiet, and the words went away, an echo.

“It’s” You were far enough away to miss his scent or to see his new appearance. It was as if he disappeared into the darkness. “okay.”

And it was okay, not because that was exactly how it was, but because it didn't matter. It was okay because it didn't matter if he responded or not, he didn't have to. You were the one who was doing wrong by continuing to trust someone who had already failed you many times, and now you were choosing not to fall for anything sure.

It was okay, because there was no important bond that bonded you two, and allowed you to do bad things where there was nothing good to destroy.

And it was okay, because you simply didn't want to continue having him in front of you, talking about one of the most important people in your life, and seeing how he looked at you with pity. So it was okay.

 

But Yoongi had said sorry three times that day, and he hadn't been able to genuinely fix any of them.

—————————•。・. ゜・。_______________

teaser masterlist two

—————————•。・. ゜・。_______________

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

A fic where Chappell and gn!reader are in an established relationship and lately reader is coming home at some very late hours, tiree, Chappell thinks reader is cheating but turns out they are just working on a club, dancing on it for money. Chappell fucks some sense into reqder for making her think the worst?

Deffo inspired by Pink Poney Club

Also lowkey inspired by glee brody cough coug

🐇

Always and Only You

|| Chappell Roan x gn!reader

|| Warnings; smut, dom chappell, bottom reader, reader eating out chappell, chappell slaps reader, chappell edging reader, slight choking, possessive chappell, uses of strap with reader receiving, rough chappell, cheating mentions, swearing, arguing, chappell thinks reader is cheating, anxiety mentions, long fic, agnst/smut

|| Summary; when reader comes home late, Chappell thinks the worst but quickly learns that wasn't the case. So she fucks reader for scaring her.

Requests open!

Started; october 22nd

Finished; october 23rd

Reblogs, comments and likes all really help and are very much appreciated! Thank you if you do🫶

~~~

3:36am. The glowing numbers lit up the room, taking all of Chappell's focus as she sprawled in the empty bed. Wondering where the hell you were. This was the seventh night in the last few weeks where you've not been home until well into the morning. Where were you? Her thoughts strayed, the combination of anxiety and lack of sleep getting to her. Were you cheating? That wouldn't be right, it couldn't be. Deep down Chappell knew you weren't a cheater. But she had to look at the facts. Any time she does get to see you, you seem tired. Like you aren't listening to her. As though your mind was elsewhere. Probably thinking about someone else. That's not even mentioning the late nights and long evenings without you.

The door opened. Chappell checked the clock again, 3:45am. She looked back to see your tired form at the door. Slouching forwards as you let yourself fall into the bed. A small whimper leaving your lips as you touched the blankets. Feeling the softness cushion you. God you needed that. Your feet were killing you.

Chappell sat up, taking in the sight of you. She sighed and folded her arms over her chest, fully planning the argument in her head. Down to the last detail so she could have all her points ready to confront you," Y/N." Her tone was sharp, getting your attention almost immediately.

"Huh..?" You were tired, confused. No idea why your girlfriend seemed so upset with you.

"That's what I get? 'Huh'?" Chappell raised an eyebrow," do you have any idea what fucking time it is?"

"Um..." You looked to the clock, then back at your girlfriend," 3;48? I know it's late, baby I'm-"

"Don't you dare apologize. So who is it?" That left you confused. Who was who? What was she- oh shit. She thought you were cheating.

You quickly sat up and kissed her, feeling her slowly melt against you. Returning the kiss, you prayed she could feel everything you did right now. How much you loved her. Breaking the kiss, you held eye contact." You." You assured her, hand coming up to cup her cheek." Always and only you."

Chappell met your eyes. She knew you weren't lying, she'd have to be blind to think you were. She took a breath, trying to calm herself down so she could hear you out." So then...?"

"A club, baby-" You saw the frustration rise in her again and quickly added," that I'm working at. Working. Promise. I'm a dancer and the hours are absolutely insane."

That relaxed her." You're such a dumbass. Don't fucking do that to me again."

You laughed a little and nodded," I'm sorry, baby." Your lips met hers, taking her into another kiss. This time her lips moved more fiercely, her hand coming up to grip your chin and pull you closer. Making you moan as you felt her nails dig into her skin.

"Chappell-" You gasped, but she didn't let you speak. Shushing you with another bruising kiss.

"No talking. Get on your knees, you're going to give me a proper apology."

"Yes, ma'am." You murmured, easily following her instructions. Getting down on your knees, facing Chappell as she positioned herself at the edge of the bed. Her hand came up to grip your chin again as she looked down into your eyes.

"Safe word?" She asked, tone softer than a moment ago and you knew things were about to get intense. You could feel the heat starting to pool.

"Red?" You suggested and Chappell nodded, the look in her eyes becoming more dominant.

"Take my pants off." There was no room for arguments, not that you would argue with her anyways. You'd happily do anything this woman told you to do. You took her lower clothing layers off, then put your tongue to work.

Lapping at her folds and looking up into her eyes, making sure she was enjoying this. The way her eyes rolled, the moan that vibrated from her throat... gave you all the validation you needed. Chappell's hand came down and gripped your hair, pulling you in impossibly closer. "Don't fucking stop." Her other hand gripped the edge of the bed behind her until her knuckles turned ghostly white.

God, you could do this all day without getting tired of it. The taste, smell, the sounds she made... everything about it was just intoxicating to you. You could feel your own wetness soaking through your clothing. Removing a hand from her hip, you brought it down and slipped it into your pants. Rubbing your clit as you moaned into hers. The pace of your tongue moving just a little faster. Chappell noticed what you were doing and pulled you away, making you whimper as the warmth against your lips disappeared. Replaced with the cool bedroom air. Her eyes locked onto yours and she forced your hand to stop," Did I say you could jerk off?" A growl slipped through her tone. You slowly shook your head, she slapped your face and gripped your neck. Her hand pressing into your chin, forcing you to meet her eyes." You wait until I tell you to, pet. Got it?"

You nodded.

"Am I fucking clear?" She asked again, trying urge a specific reaction out of you before she got it herself.

You nodded and made a small whimper, that wasn't what she wanted.

"Use your words." Her grip only tightened, forcing a small gasp out of you. Your hand came up to her wrist.

"Y-yes-"

"Good." Was all she said before she pushed your face back into her folds. The intoxicating scent refilling your nose. Your tongue lapped her wetness, sucking and licking as much of it as you could. You felt as her hand tightened in your hair, a sign that she was close. "Fucking faster.." You didn't hesitate to meet her demand. Speeding up the pace of your tongue until she gripped your hair again, yanking it as her moans got louder. She was close. So damn close. If she could just get a little more... the moment you added a finger she came undone. Coating your mouth in her cum. You lapped it up then looked at her, silently asking permission to pull away. She let you and laid back, pulling you on top of her. "Who do you belong to?"

"You.." You murmured, watching as her chest lifted and sank. Then repeated.

"Mm.." She nodded, resting a hand to your chin." Go get the strap for me, pet." The mention of the strap made you feel an ache in your lower regions. You easily obeyed the command, getting off from her and going through the desk drawer. Taking a glance at the clock, it was nearing 4;15am. This would be a long sleepless night. Luckily, you didn't have work tomorrow and neither did Chappell. So it wasn't much of an issue.

Strap in hand, you returned to your girlfriend and straddled her hips. Her hands came up and gripped your sides, feeling the fabric of your clothes and rolling it through her fingers. Making a tsk sound. "Take these off." You lifted your shirt, pulling it off and tossing it to the floor. Then your bra, followed by your underwear and pants. Chappell's eyes shamelessly trailed your body, taking in the sight as she licked her lips. "Lay down on your back for me." Her hand gave you a small slap on the ass, sending a shiver through your body and gasp out your mouth. Chappell smirked as you laid down.

The singer switched positions with you, now straddling your hips as she tightened the strap around herself. Making sure it was snug. Chappell grabbed some lube from the same drawer as the strap. Squeezing the liquid into her hand, she rubbed into both her palms before massaging it onto the silicone dick. She leaned forward, giving you a bruising kiss as she prepped the strap.

Your lips moved against hers, hands coming up and cupping her cheeks. Trying to bring her closer to you. Though before you could get even close to enough, Chappell pulled away. Her hand rested on your hip, palm pressed down in just the right spot to enhance the sensations for you. Chappell's eyes locked to yours, silently asking if you were ready for her. When you nodded, she inserted herself. Slowly at first to allow you to adjust to the size. Your hands gripped the sheets as your back arched, mouth open before you bit your lower lip." F-fuck... Chappell..."

"You're going to take all of me." She muttered, pushing a little harder now to get the last of it in. Once you were full of her, Chappell's hand came and rested on your stomach. Feeling where the end of the silicone was. A smirk formed on Chappell's lips and she pulled back before snapping her hips forwards. A loud moan fell from your lips. She repeated the action, only harder this time to get an even louder sound from you. "You're never going to scare me like that again, do you understand? You're mine. And only mine." All you could do was nod, mind only focused on the size of her as she pumped in and out of you. Moving her hips relentlessly until you finally came undone.

You couldn't form a single thought as you laid in bed, arms stretched out to the sides. Chappell got you cleaned up before she laid down next to you, gentle as she moved you into her arms." You did so good for me, baby." Her thumb brushed your hips, trailing gentle circles." So so good.." The two of you stayed like that for a while, just trying to collect yourselves. Only to fall asleep in each other's arms with 4;56 on the clock.

[bones4thecats]

🕯️2024 Halloween Prompts

Here you can find every Halloween-Themed Prompts for your {Character} × S/O requests. Each year, this will be re-updated with new prompts and a different year. Remember this, though. When you request this, put the category, emoji, and number in there. It would look like this for example;

Now, go ahead and pick your prompt!

🐇 Fluff/Angst Prompts 🌧️

Quotes⚰️

1 ᯽ "You have a leaf in your hair." 2 ᯽ "Why don't you take off that mask? I'd like to see your face." 3 ᯽ "You're scared of that? Really?" 4 ᯽ "You swear to not laugh at me if I scream?" 5 ᯽ "My friend left me here at the party. I don't know anyone around here, but you do seem to look as miserable as I feel." 6 ᯽ "You can't summon flames straight from hell. Store-bought ones are fine." 7 ᯽ "It says take one, love." 8 ᯽ "Is a certain someone scared?" 9 ᯽ "I spent so long in the darkness, I forgot how beautiful the moonlight was." 10 ᯽ "You're the devil in disguise..." 11 ᯽ "Yeah. You're gonna have to work way harder than that to scare me." 12 ᯽ "Are you trying to be scary? Because you look way more cute than that." 13 ᯽ "Mommy/Daddy! Look! I'm Daddy/Mommy!" 14 ᯽ "Boo!" - "You're scarier with the mask off." 15 ᯽ "What in the name are you supposed to be?" - "Isn't it obvious?" 16 ᯽ "Kill me now and put me out of my sugar-filled misery." - "I told you not to eat your whole bucket..." 17 ᯽ "Oh god! Candy corn? What's wrong with you?" - "What? Okay. This candy is hated for no good reason. It's good!" 18 ᯽ "It's only a haunted house. It'll be a walk in the park." - "More like a walk through hell." 19 ᯽ "Oh! That's scary!" - "That's not a part of the costume, dumbass." 20 ᯽ "I'll go by myself." - "Who're you gonna call?" - "Ghostbusters?" 21 ᯽ "You look so dumb." - "Good. That means my impersonation of you is spot-on." 22 ᯽ "What happened to you?!" - "Relax. The blood's fake."

Scenarios🎃

1 ᯽ Decorating the house with {Character} 2 ᯽ Carving Jack-O-Lanterns together 3 ᯽ Spooky movie marathon 4 ᯽ Trick-or-Treating with the family/friends 5 ᯽ Going to a Haunted House 6 ᯽ Scary-story time 7 ᯽ Matching costumes and getting shipped together by friends 8 ᯽ The Haunted Mansion 9 ᯽ Family costume contest 10 ᯽ Baking your Halloween candy 11 ᯽ Haunted corn maze 12 ᯽ Costume shopping 13 ᯽ Doing each other's makeup 14 ᯽ Halloween photo-shoot 15 ᯽ Spooky masquerade ball 16 ᯽ Acting in a Haunted House together 17 ᯽ Going to a Halloween party together

[cheetahsprints]

Lingyi fic rec list!

In case anyone floats into the tag and needs this. Personal and without review/explanation because brain too rotted. I just adore this tragically non-canon pairing almost as much as our main guys.

💌 trust my love - panpipe - E - Chapters: 1 - Jin Ling confesses his feelings, and Lan Jingyi has to muddle through the aftermath. (The aftermath is they're in love.)

🕊️ best friends forever - varnes - T - Chapters: 1 - Jin Ling and Jingyi get engaged. Things spiral from there.

⚔️ Can’t Keep Holding My Breath - singingintheshower48 - T - Chapters: 2 -  Two post-canon snippets about Jin Ling and Lan Jingyi enduring growing pains, enduring a war, and somehow finding their way together.

🔥 how can i find the words to say (love has surely shifted my way) - annadream - G - Chapters: 6 -  Jingyi’s steely eyes blazed brighter than the flames surrounding them and in that moment Jin Ling knew he was in love with this loud, obnoxious fool.

📱 the song stuck in my head - poefucker (drbubblegum) - E - Chapters: 7 - Waiting until his third year of college to finish off his last actual gen ed class is absolutely a mistake, and Jingyi proudly admits to it. Public speaking is an unfortunately necessary evil. Or: the juniors have that college experience like the movies show us.

🧞‍♂️ over, sideways, & under - poefucker (drbubblegum) - T - Chapters: 10 -  Jingyi goes nighthunting. It should be that simple. But somehow, after a fateful encounter with a rude, runaway boy and getting trapped in a cave, he's strongarmed into bringing disaster upon the whole of the cultivation world by summoning the infamous Yiling Laozu for unknown purposes. Except now he grants wishes and is actually really funny for an evil spirit. Weird.

🙇‍♂️could someone call a referee - poefucker (drbubblegum) - T - Chapters: 1 -  The one where they go to prom.

📦 all there’s left to do is run - poefucker (drbubblegum) - T - Chapters: 1 -  Lan Jingyi helps his professor move in with his husband. The day doesn't end up like he expected.

🐇 what must it be like to grow up that beautiful? - taetaeloveschimmy - Not Rated - Chapters: 6 -  Jin Ling is in love with Lan Jingyi and he's not exactly thrilled that he's finding this out about himself. Meanwhile, Jingyi is also grappling with his own emotions and complicated history with Jin Ling, leaving both of them unsure of where they stand with each other.

📑 A Guide to Dumbasses Getting Together - Midori_99 - T - Chapters: 5 - Lan Jingyi pines, in poetic melancholy fashion like a true Lan, bemoaning his fate of falling in love with someone as difficult as that Spoilt Mistress Jin. Too bad his love would forever be unrequited and there's no way Jin Ling would ever look at him that way! Lan Sizhui and Ouyang Zizhen would like to disagree. "Mission: Get an overworked Jin Ling to rest and an idiotic Lan Jingyi to stop pining and just confess already, commence!"

📝 Jin Ling’s Heart Is So Big Because It’s Full of Bad Poetry - corduroyserpent - G - Chapters: 1 -  If Jin Ling had learned anything about love in his sixteen years of being alive, it was this: love made people crazy. Sometimes love made you do things like write horrifically bad poetry. It happens!

💝 Oh no- Jiujiu!!! - You_know_yeah - M - Chapters: 1 -  Jin Ling takes a break and fucks off to the Cloud Recesses to "study". Jiang Wanyin follows with the threat of paperwork and leg breaking. All Jin Ling wants to do is kiss his boyfriend and chill :(

🦊 Chasing Gold - albsyant (transtobio) - T - Chapters: 9 -  Jin Ling expected this to be just a regular night hunt, but it didn’t even last a day before disaster struck.

Lan Jingyi, meanwhile, had no idea what to do with the fox that seemed determined to cuddle against him 24/7. What had done this to Jin Ling, and could he please get his prickly cru-friend back?

🌧️ bending the clouds - Jenki - G - Chapters: 1 - Jin Ling's father left him destined to become a leader of the earthbending sect but he didn't leave him his earthbending skills. On the other hand, his mother's waterbending talent was the reason for all of his problems. But he had learned how to isolate himself and hide his secrets and feelings from everyone.Until one day an airbender from Gusu discovered his secret and, with the help of his friends, began to do his best to make Jin Ling feel loved.

👨‍🏫 just because you’re an idiot doesn’t mean you can’t go to college - theinkquiry - T - Chapters: 1 -  “So Lan Jingyi asked you for help to get Professor Wei and Professor Lan together. Does… does he not realize they’re already married?”

“No.” Jin Ling rolled his eyes. “Because he’s an idiot.”

[thilsworld]

[Nov 2nd 2024]

Today I went on a 6km walk for a fundraiser event for Kim Hongjoong's birthday! 🎉

Well, the goal was 6km, but in the end according to my phone it was 7km, and according to my mom's fitbit watch it was 7.8km. Guess overachieving is just the norm for me nowadays.

I never really go on walks, it's not my thing. Either you're in a park and there's people and I am bad at basic social cues meaning I hate small talk (even saying hi as you pass someone I'll overthink). Or you're near traffic, and that's overwhelming in terms of sounds, lights, and fast moving objects in my peripheral all the time.

BUT, I joined a sponsor event!!

Basically for the birthday of singer Kim Hongjoong of the band Ateez, he was partnering with Global6kWorldVision to raise funds for water supplies for a more rural area in Africa. So to support my favorite singer and his goals to help out the world, I decided to participate in the event! 🧡

After donating the entry fee of €8, everyone was sent a file of a participation number. Like those you'd also get when running a marathon with a number on your chest. You'd print these, take a picture with it, walk or run 6km, and post a screenshot of your tracking app as proof of participation.

With the autumn weather it was definitely a bit cold for such a long walk, but the beautiful scenery made up for it.

I was a bit dumb though, cause I own hiking shoes. However, my dumbass put on my scensory safe sneakers which have velcro straps to close them. Which is good for short distances, but because the velcro doesn't close the shoes as tightly as hiking shoes would, I now have blisters 🥲

However I also got to see some pretty parks, and also walked past this small farm with 2 donkeys, a bunch of chickens, and some bunnies! 🐇

Lowkey my hair looks so nice in that picture with the donkeys!? It never looks that wavy but I love it 🤭

I didn't use my headphones for the majority of my walk, but the last 1km was on the sidewalk next to busy roads, meaning I was getting overwhelmed by the traffic noises FAST!

Luckily Hongjoong had also prepped a playlist for everyone participating, so I got to listen to some songs by him and his group, some old classics from artists like David Bowie and Michael Jackson, and some more pop-rock-esque songs from my own teen years since he is the same age range as me and grew up on similar music, such as Twenty One Pilots, Paramore and Panic! At The Disco. My personal favorite song from the playlist and thus my song recommendation of the day: Runaway Baby by Bruno Mars 💛

Since it's also just 2 days after Halloween, some people still had decorations up, which was nice to see since our country doesn't even really celebrate Halloween. But this one neighbour was fully decked out with amazing decorations and there were trick or treat tables by front doors and stuff, so I'm guessing that specific neighbourhood had decided to celebrate together for the kids there, which was so cute 🎃

So yeah, while I don't really like going on walks due to sensory overwhelm, and the muscle pain and blisters afterwards are telling me to never do it again, I did have a lot of fun doing this, and I'm glad I could participate in this fundraiser event.

The rest of the day I just sat in my comfy chair watching Netflix btw. I deserved to recharge after that walk 😂

To end of this blog entry, 3 positive things of today I'm grateful for:

After I got home from the long walk I made soup and my mom made French toast, so I had a nice warm lunch after exploring the cold outside world 🍂

I am proud of myself for going out of my comfort zone and going on this walk while trying out some new coping strategies I learned in therapy for my autistic sensory overwhelm 🩷

When I got home my cat Storm fell asleep in my lap and on top of my arm. It was a bit impractical to have 1 arm be trapped under his weight, but he was too cute to move him. I'll put a picture of him here 🥹

Thank you for reading!

Much love,

- Thil ✨

[uno-writing]

okay hear me out,

uno cast taking you to the ERAS tour bc yes!😝😝😝

Also here are the albums i think are their favs:

Arlo: Evermore (he definitely loves tolerate it and long story short idk man)

Remi: Lover/1989 (Daylight, Wonderland and All of the girls you loved girly for sureee)

Seraphina: She gives me Midnights vibes???( her favourite song is maybe maroon/dear reader/would’ve couldve shouldve)

John: Reputation (cause he wants to be emo but idk what his fav song would be)

Isen: He’s THE swiftie. he deffo likes reputation/speaknow/folklore (perhaps a my tears ricochet girly?👀)

Blyke: Red? Mayhaps? Who knows tbh (he doesnt really listen to her but i feel like hed like you belong with me and we are never ever getting back together)

wooo! wait berri what’s your fav taylor album 😍😍😍

mines is 1989/Lover hehe

okay thats all

-Candy Anon🍭🍬🍫

i dont rlly listen to t swiftieeeeeeeeeeeeee buttttttttttttt i like the song midnight rain a lottttttttttt

Also srry this is so short I couldn't rlly think of a lot jfkldsjldsjlkgs ilyyyyyyy🍿🥤🍭🍬🍫🧋🥨🥬🍦🍧🧊🐇🍩🥖📦🌻🥒🍰🌮

I kinda don't think Sera, John or Arlo would vibe well at a concert but they'd watch a recording of the concert with you!

Dumbass Trio is def dressing as their fav album vibes tho and they're all not gonna be able to talk the entire week after.

[joels6string]

hi Kate I’ve missed you and your blog. I know it’s only been a few days ago since my last interaction but I genuinely felt withdrawals. life is not the same when you’re not reading HC’s about pixel kings every little trait and quirk. Also the pictures you posted of him threading his hand through his hair??? Absolutely diabolical. I wonder what kind of soap they use in Jackson?? My first thought was lard because it’s easy to make but I don’t want to believe Joel smells like lard 😔 AGH also yes the spa day fan art chefs kiss 🥰 sending u an eternal amount of love 🐇

I’ve missed you! It’s been slow these past few days 😂.

So it’s funny you mention the soap because my dumbass looked up how to distill essential oils not too long ago and it seemed feasible enough for someone in Jackson to figure out so I always just say they infuse their soap with lavender essential oil so they smell nice lol. Oddly enough he has different bottles for hair and soap and he even has one in his other bathroom that says bath and I’m telling myself it’s some form of bubble bath because it makes me laugh and smile 😂💜.

Muah! Thank you for popping back by 🥹🥹

[violaceous-veneration]

Satanick: If you don't stop talking, I'm going to jump out of the window.

Ivlis: ... We're on the ground floor.

Satanick: I know but I want a dramatic exit.

[heartc0ffin]

Hewwo! What about 🌹,🐇 and 🩹for Beetlejuice and/or Bo Sinclair? :3c ~ @avid-adoxography

Wahh thank you so much!! I would love to answer for Bo, I miss my evil husband so much!

🌹— if the roles were reversed, your f/o selfship themselves with you, would you two still be obsessed with each other as usual or stronger?

Djfndjc I'm assuming my s/i is in Bo's role, and he is in her place? Well, their relationship is already kind of unusual and toxic, so reversed to me would feel even more chaotic. I don't see Bo as the type to self ship, and if he was in Bunny's (my s/i) role, being hunted down and captured to possibly be made into a wax sculpture, I think he would just be pissed as hell the entire time.

Even if Bunny decided not to make him into a wax sculpture, and kept him around, acted really sweet and doting towards him... he'd still be pissed about being captured. So I'm not sure if romance would blossom in this situation, but maybe if he somehow became interested in the work she was doing, and about the town, then maybe things would take off from there.

🐇 — what kind of pet do you think you could raise together with them?

This is a little difficult, because I'm not sure how Bo would feel about pets. I'm inclined to think he would find them bothersome and would complain that they get in the way, but perhaps over time he would get attached to one, lol. I think a dog would be useful for him, as it could scent out strangers, or victims trying to escape. Lester is the Sinclair brother who I think is more of a dog lover though, so he might be the one to take the dog out on hunting trips with him most of the time. Bunny isn't much of a dog person herself, but I think if its one who enjoys cuddling and has a friendly personality, she would grow very attached! She is at home by herself a lot of the time while Bo is in his garage, so she would appreciate any pet for company tbh.

🩹 — if you or your f/o got hurts, how would the other react?

Bo - Yeah, pissed as hell. As far as he is concerned, Bunny is his property like everything else in the town. Anyone who hurts her or his brother's, for that matter, eats shit. Well, unless she got herself hurt by accident or something, he'd probably call her a dumbass in that case, but will begrudgingly make sure she is okay and will tell her to be more careful, lol. Honestly if she does get hurt, his mind probably does jump to the worst scenarios, and he assumes that someone attacked her.. I guess it's a subtle way to show that he cares.

Bunny - Panics and immediately tries to help him, to which he probably reacts at first by trying to push her away. Even when he is close to someone, like his brothers, he doesn't like to accept their help because he's a stubborn man. But he also can be too impulsive, which makes things worse. He doesn't like to feel like he's being told what to do either, so trying to step in and give him advice is difficult as well, and can make the situation more stressful. Bunny would try to at least calm him down first before she can try to help fix the problem. She will most-likely not go after whoever hurt him, unless the situation was dire and she was acting in self-defense, otherwise she is just more worried about Bo's wellbeing, tbh.

[uweiy]

Original Content Masterpost

because even I can’t find my own damn content on this damned website.

*All fics mentioned are directly on Tumblr unless specified otherwise

The Untamed

Gifsets: Wwx and rooftops /Wangxian and jc being done part 1, part2, part3 / Yiling laozu /At Nevernight I wasn't by your side / I broke my promise /Bunny lanterns 🐇 / Lwj understanding the golden core thing

Fanart: Wwx flower boy mini comic / The red undergarnment / Song Lan / It snows / Yanqing and books

Memes: Is this... 🫱🦋🐦?/ Stabbing yourself in the heart /Picture u can hear /Y'all deserved better / Alignment chart / Tag urself (the untamed characters as people in my classroom ft. Stickmen) / The Untamed character generator

A lot of Textposts-y memes:

Wwx introducing himself and lwj / wwx translating lwj microexpressions / he'd marry you if you asked brother / wwx chugging a whole jar of ??? / Wwx no / there is no cure / Jiang fengmian loves his sons equally / lqr at wangxian wedding / wangji this is not allowed / I'm cold / get the hoe / I wasn't drunk / wen Ning is precious / shut UP / good morning :D

The juniors shenanigans: Jin Ling adulting / *sneaking out*/da headbands very precious yes / fairy climbs a tree

Fics

Xicheng Trying to hold on to you (1.6k, hurt/comfort), you confused me with a fucking dog (1.6k, College AU), They were roommates (10k, college AU)

Wangxian: Night of shooting stars (1.3k,Star!Lwj), Those who bleed (600 words, angst)

Other: Dangling Accessories (1.9k JC&Jin ling, Wandering Heart (Yanqing, 1.5k) Mianmian's Education course (Jc &wq, 800words) Alive (wwx-centric, drabble), Ouyang Zizhen at yi-city (<1k)

More detailed Cql-fic masterpost (with summaries) INCOMPLETE. Or read them in the AO3 collection (username Namariae).

Talks and other stuff

Yanqing 😍

The Untamed rewatch

2019 top 10 favourite posts / 2019 top 10 most popular posts

Cql OST / Beyond Control (LXC Character song)

Ask game

Cultivator conferences = disaster

Mriad

Posts: Chuyao being gay / Chuyao still being gay / list of things Lu Yao stole from Chusheng / Seriously so gay / go make me coffee

Fics: Empty space(filled with flowers) / All that glitters (ao3)

The Devil Judge

Beyond Evil vs The Devil Judge

Textposts: Get the fuck outta my house / Noo don't check me out ahaha / the Gaon Judas imagery

Gifs: *homoerotically pushes you against wall*I heard you live alone / the Kang Mansion / undresses you to tend to ur wounds

Fic: Rightful Place part 1 (Gahan)/ Rightful Place Masterpost

Love is Science

What the fuck is Love is Science?

Gifs: Ouwen's oh shit moments / Mark panicking bc gay / Shen Ying imitating a Sloth / that kiss in the gym / Ouwen pretty ✨ / Lee Mark's outfits are bisexualcore / love is in the little things

Memes/Other: Savage Ouwen / u're reasonable but ur friends are dumbasses /

Fic: The Mark/Ouwen sickfick no one asked for (domestic)

Recommendation lists

Top 5 BL shows I like

I have nothing to watch (yes u do)

Other:

Pile of Goop Aoki (Kieta Hatsukoi) / Rainless love in a Godless land / To my Star cooking (To my Star) / The 6 stages of Tumblr / Hanahaki disease prompts(?)

>📺(more or less) Current Watchlist

___

Other interests

Lotr

Viggo Mortensen has chaotic neutral energy

Continued list of things Viggo did

I've only had Frodo for a Day and a half

What do we do When we are sad

Aragorn you go king

(Discussion)Why does Gandalf love hobbits so much?

The Clearest diamonds (Bagginshield, AO3)

Stranger Things / The Sandman

over at @grabyourpillow

[strayai]

Ango obviously 🙏☺️ I'm curious to know your opinion !

ALT

 [they’re neat | *shrug* | mischaracterized (but hey i probably fall under this half too :P) | head pats >:D | aesthetic (i like double-breasted coats and uniform-esque type of clothes oK also glasses) | positive feelings | i love them :D]

tumblr user 🌙strayai may or may not have subconsciously purposely marked the last two row blocks that complete my diagonal line for me to get a ⋆bingo!⋆ for him

my brain is too dried from playing too much toarise in one day but here are my random thoughts that are (sometimes just tangentially) related to Ango:

i have a massive attachment to buraiha so that translates to an attachment to ango

yes i love them as a trio of emos and/or dumbasses

yes i also ship them but that’s a topic for another day

i like to think of ango as someone who does what he’s good at for the sheer reason that he’s good at it/that he can do it

and that his time with oda and dazai was a time where he actually lived, and not just existed or worked or have been useful

i, however, haven’t read 55 minutes or the gaiden

for now i think he’s not all that good with planning—

more a cramming and thinking on the fly operative—

and then overthink the past at a more peaceful time— type of person

those and that he’s only had two people he’s ever considered important/as friends in his life and he’s not willing to lose the remaining one to another “job well done”

i think he’s sentimental and lonely or i’m just projecting

i share the opinion/headcanon/wish of that one/two post/s that said jailbreak arc better end with ango flicking dazai’s forehead and calling him his friend

tldr i want this man to be happy

i’d buy him a golden fizz once i get a job

🐇

[venusbluez]

do it if you’re comfortable with it<3 jst know i will compliment the fuck out of you

-🐇

BITCH BRB YOU’VE CONVINCED ME

that took like 30 seconds ted bundy woulda loved my dumbass 😭

[karmafalling]

✈ 🐇 ☕

✈️ what is your dream city and why? 

umm bc im a dumbass bitch and love my hometown so much i would say right here! but for visiting maybe barcelona? i speak spanish (terribly) and i haven’t gotten to travel much 

🐇 what do you always daydream about? 

lol literally whatever im far too fixated on at the time (which changes often) and it’s what i do now instead of writing stories so there’s that!

☕️ talk about your ideal day

listen. if i could take my cat places then every day would be my ideal day. but probably getting my nails done, shopping, then going to my fav restaurant. and getting to pet my cats at some point.