#Do something stupid. Feels like everyone else have done so... Ive never done something ... Stupid. Irresponsible etc.

[mrfoox]

I've had two drinks and like... Two shots and Oliver was not a fan of my adventures

[oceanofsinners]

“They love me, they love me not.”

Yan!Pervy cupid x gn innocent succubi/incubi reader ♥︎

[mdni, or do, i don't care enough to block y'all tbh. NSFW, first time in a while writing it so apologies ack. tw/cw: mentions of violence, blood, religious stuff kinda. lmk if i have to add smth else too! also?? sorry for disappearing i got stuck in the hospital, ouchies!! also holy fuck this is 2.k words ive never wrote that much...]

Nova wasn't...normal. Well, to be fair, it wasn't their fault he was created this way. It was Father’s fault.

 

Being born a Cupid, but being unable to feel most emotions, or even love. How ridiculous. Pathetic, even. Compared to their brothers and sisters, he was useless.

 

They grew up alone and isolated, no one wanted a Cherub whose expression was always bored. No one wanted a Cherub who never wanted to play with the others or found joy in small things. 

 

He grew up in one of the few orphanages in Paradise, some human souls for foster parents who weren't able to have kids themselves, happy to have any.

 

Angels were meant to be cheerful and optimistic, they were neither. Many thought he'd grow up to be a Guardian Angel or an Archangel. 

 

Never a Cupid. Especially a Love Cupid. Maybe a Heartbreak Cupid, even Erotic Love Cupid, but Love? They didn't even truly understand what the word meant. Or so everyone thought. 

 

Angels were meant to be non-judgemental. Meant to be “kind” and believe in everyone. Angel’s are not. Angels are just as judgemental, perhaps even more than humans. 

 

The other Cupids always watched him in disdain when they were training, he always dragged their class down, being worse at it than most of the others.

 

But then, in high school, something changed. See, Angels and Demons typically don't like each other. 

 

Angels hate Demons for falling, and Demons hate the lies Angels say. But in the end, they are one and the same. 

 

Only one’s halo is broken, the other’s is perfectly fine. No, not halo, horns. If there was one thing special about Nova, it was their “halo“, or horns. 

 

They were a beautiful baby pink color that matched the pearly white hair that reached his shoulders, with pretty gold and bright pink streaks, that made their purple eyes pop. 

 

Even though Nova couldn't feel anything, he was beautiful. Freckles were made in the forms of constellations scattered over brown skin, and white eyelashes that looked like snowflakes. 

 

They were beautiful. Ethereal. An Angel, through and through. He never imagined they'd fall willingly, even hating the thought. 

 

But, maybe for one person, he would. That person is YOU. 

 

The Demons and Angels made an agreement, there was an academy built, for both Angels and Demons of all ranks and backgrounds, a sort of truce.

 

Nova was one of the angels chosen, amongst many others. They didn't care about it, just wanting it to be done already. To get the embarrassment over. 

 

Days turned into weeks of staying in the shadows, going to boring classes, eating lunch in empty classrooms, studying all night, and repeat. 

 

It was boring, but it's not like Nova had anything he could do about it. Another day of stupid school, of stupid wars between haughty Angels and Demons who liked fighting. 

 

Except this time, Nova got caught in the crossfire. Cuts covered their skin, golden blood leaking down and ruining his beautiful clothes.

 

One of the Demons had them pushed up against a wall, claws to his throat, and they stood there blank gaze. Nova raised a brow as the Demon got pushed, and went to walk away. 

 

Then YOU came. You seemed confused at the fight, trying to make peace despite it being fruitless. You paused at the sight of him, before gasping and quickly running over. 

 

“Ah, you're bleeding! Gosh, I told these dummies to stop fighting, they just don't listen!” You frowned, trying to appear upset but you just looked like a kicked puppy with a pout. 

 

You pulled them off to the side, reaching inside a black messenger back absolutely covered in cutesy stickers and pins from different bands. 

 

Nova took the time to look at you, really look at you. It was strange. Why was his heart beating so fast? Wings fluffing up? You were beautiful. One of the prettiest Demons they’d ever seen. 

 

That's what clued him into what you were, an Incubus or Succubus. Really, there was no difference between the two except for their behavior. Incubus tended to be more assertive, and Succubus more passive. 

 

Before Nova could think about anything else, you pulled a first aid kit out, opened it up, and pulled a pack of bandaids out. 

 

You started disinfecting their wounds, before putting those cute, colored bandaids on each wound.

 

Nova looks silly like this, mostly black, Gothic ensemble, even with his pastel eyes and horns, they still looked less like an Angel and more like a Demon. 

 

And there you were, broken halo turned into a pair of horns, dressed in cutesy clothes, putting brightly colored bandaids on the mean-looking Cupid. 

 

With every fleeting touch, Nova felt embers light under his skin, his cheeks warming even further. ‘...What...What is this feeling? I don't...’

 

Before Nova even realized it, they were leaning even further into your cold, almost dead touch. You paused, before giggling and roping your arms around his shoulders. 

 

“Wow! You're super friendly, I like you, your hair too, it's super duper long! What's your name?” You asked, playing with his long hair, curling it around your fingers.

 

“Casanova. But people call me Nova, usually. What's yours?” Nova looked up at you, a lovesick hazy look in his purple eyes, heart pupils. How amusing. A Cupid falling for an Incubi/Succubi. What are the odds? 

 

“Oh! Right! It's—” Before you can finish, a teacher begins herding everyone to their classes. Nova’s pissed —‘How...Why do I feel so angry?’— but goes along with it, delighted to see you wave with a sheepish grin, fangs showing. 

 

Nova doesn't know your name. But he doesn't need to. You're his angel in their mind, the one and only made for him. 

 

Very quickly you become a prominent part of his life, their parents even allowing you to stay at their house while the program goes on, happy to see their child so happy for once. 

 

With so many emotions suddenly hitting him all at once, it's no shock they fall harder than he should, becoming obsessed fast and hard. 

Nova begins realizing things they'd never realized before. The curves of your body. Those soft eyes he wants to see sobbing from pleasure. Those lips open, gasping their name—

 

But it ends far too soon. The program is forced to close, and you're gone just as fast as you came. Nova hates how empty he feels when you're gone, wondering how he ever lived without you.

 

He feels cold inside, a part of him disappearing with you. Something they can NEVER get back. He tries to be normal, smiling when he should, crying when he should, just be normal. 

 

It's easy for a while. To pretend. No, BE normal. Far too soon, or maybe far too late, he graduates high school. Then college. 

 

Years fly by, “friends” come and go, lovers he didn't give a shit about disappear after they get bored, and more and more blood then just his is on their hands. 

 

But you weren't always gone. You'd sneak out of hell and sneak onto paradise sometimes, and hang out with them. But it wasn't enough. He wanted all of your time and attention on him. Just once, they want someone to be there as a constant. 

 

Eventually he lands a job at Soulmates Corp. A Cupid work place, and he starts working. It's actually pretty simple and interesting. Sure, they don't use bow and arrows — usually. But being able to look through humans lives, to choose who they fall for. It's interesting. 

 

And then, one night, you innocently invite him to a club in hell. They instantly agree, after all, it's YOU. His angel, their savior, his LIFE LINE. Their EVERYTHING. 

 

Funnily enough, over the years the two swapped clothing styles. Nova wore more cutesy, sweet, pastel color clothes, and you wore darker, more “sexy” clothes. 

 

Nova arrived at the club, absentmindedly toying with the pockets of his pastel blue cardigan. Tonight would be the last night of your freedom - independance, after all! 

 

Nova walks in, you on his side, some of your friends accompanying the two of you. He could care less about these bastards, and soon makes sure to seperate you from your “friends”.

 

He watches you with loving eyes the entire night, making sure you get drunk so bad you can't stand. It's easy, you're too trusting. Too innocent for this world. 

 

He'll save you, just like you saved them! Eventually they take you to their place. At first it's tame. Friendly. 

 

“N—Novaaahhhh...C’mere, I hic! wanna see yer pretty faceeee...” Your voice is whiny, the alcohol really hitting you hard. Nova coos, walking over. 

 

They yelp, quite loudly, as you drag them onto the bed, curling into his side. It's innocent. His thoughts should be too. 

 

But all they can think about is your chest pressed against their arms, how easy it would be to just slip your shirt to the side, and touch. Feel.

 

He shakes his head, even if you're both drunk, he can't take advantage of you like that. They refuse to taint you, and that pretty little head of yours. 

 

Stuck in their own thoughts, Nova doesn't even realize you straddle him until it's too late. Your eyes are hazy with lust and alcohol, and he can't help but gulp nervously. 

 

“Angel, really, you...you need to sleep.” Nova tries to reason with you, but reasoning with a horny, drunk Demon, much less an Incubi or Succubi is like arguing with a wall. 

 

You whine, lips lazily smashing against his. Nova can't help but melt into it, and they hate how hard they are from just a touch, a single kiss. 

 

This is wrong. Both of you know this. Yet neither of you can stop it. One kiss turns into two, into three. 

 

“An-Angel!” Nova gasps out as you nip at his collarbone, their neck already covered in love bites and pretty blue and purple bruises. 

 

“Mmph..Wan’ more...Need more, Nova...” You growled out, one hand playing with his chest the other curled in their hair. 

 

More marks. More bites. So many. He looked so pretty like this, a crying mess under their ‘innocent’ friend. 

 

Still, he held enough restraint to stop you, not wanting to ruin your first times together. But, due to your insistence, they do give you some pleasure~

 

Nova sits on his knees, you splayed out on their silk sheets, your slick dripping onto the bed as you whined. Hips jerking up to meet his tongue, hands curled around their halo. 

 

Nova’s tongue swirls against your sex, whining from the taste of your juices against his tongue. It was better then he imagined all those nights, hand playing with their cock, desperate for some relief. 

 

With every swipe and sucking of his mouth, you get closer and closer to that sweet relief you desperately need. With one last gasp, your eyes roll back and hips buck against Nova’s mouth. 

 

Nova laps up every bit of your sweet essence, fucking you through your orgasm. He's gentle after you finish, murmuring praises into your ears as they carry you to their bathroom. 

 

During the bath you end up falling asleep, Nova carries you to bed and the two fall asleep, intangled in each other. 

 

It's morning. Your eyes flutter open, yawning softly as you groaned. Fuck, that's a horrible headache. You glance around, pausing as you feel a weight beside you. What the...

 

Your eyes glide to the person laying beside you, and you pause, your cheeks warming. Nova. You're in Nova’s bed. 

 

Nova, the Cupid boy you met as a kid. Nova, the Cupid you fell for, hard. Nova, the Cupid who always seemed so clueless and innocent. 

 

And they truly look like an Angel right now. The sun shines against against his white hair and skin beautifully, wings folded behind them. 

 

Your face feels even warmer as embarrassment fills you as you see bite marks all over their neck. Bite’s are how Demon’s mark their claim, usually on their mates. Angel’s too. 

 

He let you bite them. And yet, you can't find yourself to be mad over it. Nova’s eyes flutter open, glancing up at you. A soft smile appears on their face, as they lean up and kiss you. 

 

The Angel traps you in his wings and you giggle, curling into them. He's yours, and your his even if you don't know yet. 

 

You took their heart a long time ago. It's time he takes yours too. ♥︎

[gamerchrissgf]

Stranger ~ C.S

In which.. Reader and Chris have hooked up many times before. But its starting to feel like every other hook up shes had. She feels used.

Toxic!Chris, mean!chris, fwb! (Ending ofc) Angst, arguing, name calling (slut, whore like once for both lol.) gaslighting, manipulation (same thing ngl)

a/n: y’all i took the smut out bc i don’t want my first fic to be smut. I need to work up to that point lol.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

“Imma head out now ma” chris says as he finishes buckling his pants. You look at him rolling your eyes letting out a scoff. “Right” you say attitude laced in your voice. Getting up picking your clothes up off the ground sliding back into them. You’re not even looking at him and you can feel his eyes shooting daggers at the back of your head. “What now? Why do you have a bitch ass attitude?!” He questions his tone sounding stern. You turn around pulling your shirt down completely. You make eye contact with him puckering your lips while sucking your teeth. Letting out a sigh you choose to ignore his stupid question and walk past him out of your room downstairs towards your front door. Chris following right behind you. “S’nothing just go chris. Im done.” you say unlocking the door. Right as you open the door Chris hand shoots up slamming the door shut “Nah you’re going to tell me what the fuck your problem is” he says he pulls you by your wrist towards the couch “Sit.” He says while pushing you to sit on the couch. ‘Why tell me to sit when you were physically going to make me dumbass’ you thought to yourself. Chris sits beside you taking his cap off ruffling his hair and placing the cap back on “The fuck is your problem?” He asks. The look on his face tells you he’s agitated but you honestly don’t care anymore. You’re tired of being used. You thought chris would be different. But it’s the same. Him and every other guy you’ve been with are the same. Strange right? “Honestly Chris… honestly I’m just done and tired. Your the same as everyone else. You said you were different but your the same” you state looking him in the eyes. “Does it make you happy knowing how much you’re fucking breaking me?” You ask him raising your voice in the slightest. Chris whips his head towards you “breaking you? Please. I told you my intentions. You were the one who stuck around!” He yells standing up from the couch. “You were the one that said ‘no chris I understand what you want and im okay with that’ ive tried ending it. But you come crawling back!” Continuing his rant. You also decide you should stand up. Standing a little too close to him for either of your own comfort at this point. “Me?! Crawling back? Don’t flip this shit on me! You’re also not making it any easier. The dates? Movie nights? Cuddling me? Telling me you LOVE me? Like what the fuck. How is this my fault?!” You question. Chris just stares at you with a blank expression “Exactly Chris. Don’t ever pin all of this shit on me ever again. Your childish. So fucking childish. You get mad when another dude looks my direction. YOU get mad when im texting other guys! YOU get mad at me when I talk to Nate, who might I add Ive known longer than you! Grow the fuck up!” You ramble on screaming at this point. Adding the Nate situation wasnt very necessary but its true. You have known Nate longer. Having grown up with the kid since preschool. “Im childish?! I need to grow up?! How about you grow the fuck up. You’re such a whore that the second any guy gives you validation or attention in the slightest you willing to let him in your pants. Maybe if you stopped being a slut any guy would take you seriously. Because i sure as hell don’t. We were good as just friends. Both of us should have never agreed to this friends with benefits bullshit” he says poking his tongue in his cheek. Letting out a huff you walk away. “Im glad we both agree on something. Can you go now?” You say opening the front door. “Yea. Whatever. We aren’t done tho. I just need a break.” He says standing in front of you. You knew this was going to happen. He was going to pick an argument, call you names, manipulate you back into his bullshit. “No chris. I think we are. Lets just go back to strangers. I know ya face, i know ya name but i dont KNOW you.” His face softens looking defeated “if thats what you want. I understand. But I love you.” He says reaching to grab your arm. Pulling your arms away you look him in his eyes, for a split second you almost fell for it. “No chris. Im sorry” you say opening the door wider. Its over.

For now.

a/n: AHHHH EW IS IT GOOD?! Lmk lol. I hate how mean chris seems in this lol. Might do a pt 2 idk. The ending is edging y’all.

[thewebcomicsreview]

Hamsteak? Again? God, everything happens so much, but at least we're done with Vriska. And I can copy and paste text again. Wowsers. Anyway we're out of hell and now we're with The Moms, in a suspiciously green-and-orange environment.

ROSE: This is an impressive shield. ROSE: I don't think I've ever seen you make one this size before. JADE: ive been practicing! JADE: if i stay focused i should be able to keep it up for quite a while.

Oh hey, starting us right off with Deepest Lore, as Jade can apparently make shields. We've never really seen her "natural" Witch of Space powers in the original comic, since she was using First Guardian powers the whole time (or no powers and just gadgets like the soothspecs, back before everyone became X-Men). I've been wondering what she could do au natural, and...apparently it's shields? Would not have called that, but sure.

JADE: between yiffys capture and rescue and finding dave... JADE: like that... JADE: i just feel like my life flashed before my eyes and it made me a little crazy! JADE: after being unconscious for a bit things feel way clearer now

It's still weird to me that Dave's "death" was so recent to the characters. That was in the epilogues! We made a sequel series since then! It got cancelled! Then it got revived! It was a long time!

JADE: after being unconscious for a bit things feel way clearer now ROSE: Nothing beats a rump to the skull for mental clarity. JADE: the mistakes we made are so obvious to me now JADE: embarrassingly obvious!

Being unconscious is Jade's natural state, so naturally it heals her. Also I detect a justification for a small change in Candy Jade's characterization here, like she'll be acting differently that she has been and this is the excuse. Lets stick a pin in that thought, though.

JADE: this whole situation is my fault and even though it just keeps getting more frustrating and shitty im going to do right by you JADE: were going to figure this out ROSE: Are you sure it's prudent to keep this amateur marriage counselor performance up? JADE: rose... JADE: youre taking this seriously JADE: right? ROSE: I don't know what you mean by that.

I really do like this characterization of Candy Rose, though (which is apparently also a slight retcon from the original plans, according to the writer commentaries). None of this is real, so she doesn't give a shit about any of it. Her mid-life crisis is worse than John's.

JADE: though playing stupid and cajoling her into slapping me around for catharsis wont work anymore JADE: well have to think of something else... ROSE: Jade, I've been compliant with these clumsy machinations partially because they weren't all that consequential at the time, but you need to cut your losses.

Oh we are hard retconning Candy Jade's personality here. She's not an emotional wreck at all, at least part of it is her clumsy attempt at being Machiavellian. Are they building up to changing Yiffy's backstory, far and away the least popular idea in HS2?

JADE: "ohhhh bluh bluh blah i can see the fruitlessness of all our clumsy insignificant thrashing in fates cosmic current" JADE: dont forget im more than a little versed in future sight myself ok JADE: i dont care how credible it seems, you cant depend on that information!

Opens Homestuck_2_Speculation.rtf.doc.xpf.bro

What information is this, Jade? Is it related to the visions Calliope had that let her build the machine? The only future sight Jade's ever had is the clouds of Skaia

JADE: "abloo hoo hoo, my life is a monkey paw, everything i want hurts me in the end" ROSE: It was a little pathetic. JADE: I KNOW!

Oh man, that's going back deep.

This aspect of Jade, that deep down she's a bit of a wreck but she toughs it out because she hates her own weakness, hasn't really been focused on since Act 4 of the original comic when it got personified in Jadesprite. It's nice to see that aspect referenced again here. I liked Jade's speech justifying Yiffy's existence, it did a lot to make that plot point go down smoother, but I totally buy that Jade herself hated it. Kind of funny that we had six updates of Vriscourse and now I have way more to say about this one expository speech out of Best Girl, but Jade's actually a pretty complex character and her issues are so often glossed over as "Wow she had to live in isolation for three years after her brother and boyfriend randomly exploded and that's kind of sad I guess", so it's nice to spend some time inside her head like this.

JADE: the truth is whatever people WANT to believe JADE: you can either try forcing them to understand your side JADE: leave it completely in their hands and take no responsibility JADE: or you work with their wants and perspectives JADE: and make some informed compromises ROSE: Over the state of reality? JADE: rose i am begging you can you please cut it out with all the cryptic cosmic crap and come back down to earth???

One of my pet peeves of the epilogues is that Dave Strider turns into a Bernie Sanders supporter and keeps talking about "neoliberalism" despite living in a wacky future utopia planet and having never lived through the 2016 Democratic Primary that all his talking points were cribbed from, but we have an explanation for that now. It's his wife. Jade was the neoliberal all along.

JADE: thats whats scaring me! JADE: youre not prepared for how bad it can get JADE: you have no idea at all!!!!!!!!!!! ROSE: If you say so.

That was a joke but this is sounding a little suspiciously like voting discourse, but that might just be me being election-brained. God I'm so stressed, please vote for Harris if for no other reason to make Trump-analogue Jane Crocker feel dated and weird.

Jade has no idea what she’s talking about. There’s not a thing to worry about here. You came out the womb playing defense

You didn't come out of a womb at all. You've never even been in one. Also holy shit this page is called Rose: Ramble and it's early-HS2 levels of Wall of Text, though I think you're actually intended to glaze over it a little.

It doesn’t really matter, in the long run. Important or not, Vriska’s going to fail. Jane’s going to fail, too; really, just about everyone is going to fail to do something that really matters. In an unsuccessful effort to stave off that failure, and perhaps to atone for it on some level, Calliope will sacrifice herself, fruitlessly. You’re not exempt from the firing squad, either. In the imminent battle, you are going to be shot in the head, the bullet burying deep into your moral grey matter and jamming up the works of your conditional immortality, leaving you confined to a hospital bed. You had to pull all kinds of ridiculous, eyebrow-raising Chaos Theory shit to figure that one out. The rat-tail was worth it, your daughter’s anguish aside.

It's generally considered bad writing to have a prophecy not come true, but I think this is bullshit and Rose's Seer of Light powers don't work in a land of pure void.

KANAYA: Those Two Will Not Be Joining Us On The Battlefield Either KARKAT: OH? KANAYA: I Know Such Decisions Are Well Above My Pay Grade And That The Critical Need To Win This Battle Far Outweighs My Marital Discomfort KANAYA: And Being Down Two Gods Isnt Exactly Ideal KANAYA: But... KANAYA: I Cant KANAYA: Sorry KARKAT: DON'T BE.

KARKAT: FUCK ‘EM.

Man, Punished Karkat is cool.

Man, I love how stupid Jane's death ray looks. It's a cake!

Your father never did voice any kind of opinion on your parenting style. In hindsight, he was probably avoiding the subject altogether.

It's hard to talk with your dad when he's not allowed to have any dialogue due to stylistic convention. I have that issue with my uncle.

JAKE: Oh. JANE: chhhhhhhhlmm nnnn. JAKE: OH CRIPES! JAKE: I'M SORRY JANEY!!! JANE: kkkkkkkkaaaaaa?? JAKE: JUST- S-STAY STILL OK?

lmao. This is the absolutely best way this assassination attempt could've gone.

This art is excellent.

Man, this was a great update, Jesus. So much shit is going on, and while HS2 and HS:BC have had good moments this is the first time in a long while I've really had that classic Homestuck feeling that made me fall in love with the comic in the first place.

[medusapelagia]

Eddie's month day 12 + Whumptober day 12

written for @eddiemonth and @whumptober-archive 

Prompts: Eddie’s month 12: Soulmates | Eight - Sleeping at Last | Perceptive Whumptober 12: I haven't slept in days, but who's counting? - Red | Insomnia | “I’m up, I’m up.” 

Rating: Mature Relationship: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson WT: omegaverse, Omega Steve Harrington, Alpha Eddie Munson, Nurse Steve Harrington, violence, hospitals, medical procedures, medical inaccuracies, soulmates and soulmarks WC: 2284

"You got nice veins." the nurse tells Eddie while drawing some blood.

"Sorry?"

"Your veins. They are nice. Look how they pop out." the omega repeats, smiling at him so sweetly that Eddie has to fight with all his self-control not to pop something else right there.

"Are you worried?"

"A little." he confesses. 

It's a minor surgery, everyone told him, but he is scared. He never had surgery before and he doesn't know what to expect.

"It will be fine. It's a very simple procedure and I'll be with you all the time." the nurse comforts him.

"Will you?"

The omega nurse nods "Yes. I'm in surgery today. And you are lucky I am, my partner, Robin, is not as delicate as I am. Done."

Eddie stares at his arm and sees the long needle "This is an IV access. I will remove it as soon as the doctor discharges you, ok?"

"How long?"

The nurse looks at the clock "We start at half past eight, you are the third so I think you'll be waiting for at least an hour." the omega replies, then he asks "Can you tell me where your soulmark is? It's not written on your file."

Eddie blushes, he knows that the skin around the soulmark is sensible but his soulmark is… "Oh... it's... it's on my hips. A crown."

The nurse smirks "Lucky boy, you find yourself a prince! Or is it a queen?"

Eddie shakes his head "No... I... haven't found my soulmate yet."

The nurse keeps smiling "You are young. You still have all the time in the world to find your soulmate. Some people do not even get their soulmark recorded to the register. I waited for years before registering mine. And I did it only because my family insisted. They said that it was not appropriate for an omega male to work if he was not bonded."

"So you found your match? Are they perfect for you as everyone says?" Eddie tries to take a look at the omega mating gland but it is protected by a tick collar like every omega in the hospital.

"Sadly not.” he replies “But there are a lot of people who find their soulmates by chance. Their soulmark starts to tickle when they first meet, and if they are fated mate they say it can even shine. Not that I have ever seen a shining soulmark, but you never know, right?.” he tells him while he keeps writing something on Eddie’s file “But I think that it is possible to find love even without the designated soulmate. Many people do that. I know some couples that even erase their soulmark once they bond."

"Really?"

"Of course. But I'm sure you'll find someone perfect for you, soulmark or not. Now. Here is the gown, put it on and tie it on the back, I'll call you when we are ready for you."

"Can I ask you something?" 

The nurse turns, his hand still on the handle of the door "Do you have any doubt about the procedure? I could call a doctor if you need some explanations…"

Eddie blushes "No it’s… I... I'd like to ask you your name."

The nurse's smile is so bright that Eddie feels a little bit in love.

"Steve. The name is Steve."

***

When Eddie wakes up the kind omega is working at the computer.

He turns, as he could feel that Eddie is awake “Hey. How are you feeling? Are you in any pain?”

“Is it done?” he asks, still disoriented and sleepy.

“Everything is done. Now we wait for a little bit and then you can rest in your room.” The omega replies with a smile.

“Have I… have I done something stupid?”

Eddie has a very vague memory of having made a fool out of himself but he can’t really remember what happened.

“Hey, our lover boy is back! How are you feeling?” a blond nurse asks him, getting closer to his bed.

“Lover boy?” he asks, confused.

The girl's eyes shine “Don’t you remember? That’s such a pity. You made the most wonderful love declaration I have ever heard.”

“That’s because you never heard a love declaration before, Robin.” Steve mocks her.

Robin. Why is that name familiar to him?

“What… what are you talking about?”

“Oh. You promised our Steve to make him an honorable omega and to marry him soon. I think you tried to compose some kind of wedding song too.” She grins.

“Oh my god.” he roughly remembers that, now that she is pointing it out. Fuck. He proposed to his nurse in front of his partner! 

“I’m sorry… I don’t know why I did it.”

“Don’t worry. It was the anesthesia. I know that you are not really attracted to me.” the omega replies.

“How no, you are definitely attractive! I just didn’t mean to make a declaration in front of your partner.”

Steve stares at him perplexed, wondering if they gave him too much medicine “Who?”

“Robin? Your partner?”

The girl starts to laugh “Oh, Romeo, I’m his partner in crime, we are not partners in real life.” she explains to him, taking his vitals “Even if our Steve is actually taken. How are the things between you and Tommy, by the way? Did he finally propose or is he still unsure between you and Carol?”

“Robin, that’s not professional!” Steve scolds her.

“Come on, lover boy here is so high he will not remember a thing.”

“I don’t care. Just stop it.” 

“Ok, ok. Sorry.” she says putting a hand on Steve’s arm and the omega flinches.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

“Steve Joseph Harrington, show me your fucking arm right now!” she hisses, tugging him in a corner, but even from his position Eddie can see a blue bruise that looks like a hand.

“How the fuck did this happen?”

“I argued with Tommy. I forgot to pick up dry cleaning, but he was right to be angry because he had a really important meeting today and I’m the omega of the couple…”

“What the fuck! He can’t hit you because you forgot something.”

“He didn’t hit me!” Steve protests “He just… Grabbed me.”

“So hard to leave a bruise?”

The omega lowers his eyes and covers his arm “Come on. We still have three more patients and I have to bring Mr. Munson back to his room.”

The girl sighs “But don’t think that this conversation is over.”

“Yeah, yeah…” he comes back toward Eddie who stares at him with more attention, the omega’s eyes are red and tired, and he seems dead on his feet even if he keeps smiling and cheering Eddie up.

“All done. So now you rest a little and when the doctor says that everything is fine you can go back home.”

Eddie nods, but before falling asleep he thinks about the sweet tired omega.

How is it possible that he is in a relationship with someone who grabbed him so hard to hurt him?

Someone who can’t decide between him and another person?

He feels a strange burning sensation on his waist, but he falls asleep before he can point out exactly where the pain comes from.

***

A week later Eddie is back in the hospital, he still has to do a couple of exams just to be sure that everything is fine.

This time it is Robin who draws his blood and he definitely feels the difference.

“Steve is not here today?” he says.

“Still in love with him, lover boy?” she asks, changing the vials.

“I just wanted to thank him for being so kind to me.” Eddie shrugs.

“Well, I do hope he is resting somewhere. He was here all night long covering an extra shift.” she replies “But if I know him I think you will find him in the pediatric ward. That omega loves children.” she winks at him.

Eddie thinks for a long moment, and then he goes toward the pediatric ward.

As Robin anticipated, Steve is reading a fantasy book to a couple of pups.

“And that’s all for today.” he says, closing the book.

“Come on! Steve! Read us another chapter!” a red-haired girl complains, glaring at him with her blue eyes.

“Next time, Maxine.”

“It’s Max.” she states.

“Ok. Max. Tomorrow we will read another chapter, ok?”

The pup doesn't seem happy but then the other one notices Eddie and says something in Steve’s ear.

The omega lifts his eyes and smiles at him.

“Eddie. Did you come for your last check-up?”

The alpha nods, too embarrassed to speak, but the omega is kind as usual.

“You know what? Why don’t we have a coffee? God knows that I need one.”

***

The cafeteria is nothing fancy, but the coffee is hot and strong.

“That’s exactly what I need.” the omega sighs, drinking his cup of coffee with oat milk and brown sugar “I was ready to fall asleep when I was reading to the kids.” he laughs.

“Are you having trouble sleeping?”

“I’m a nurse.” Steve replies with a smile “I haven't slept in days, but who's counting? Right?”

Eddie’s inner alpha would like to take him home, helping him make a nest in his room and keep him there until he feels better.

“Robin said that you were supposed to rest.”

“Yeah, I know. But I promised Max and Dust that we would read a chapter today and I’m not going to have any free time later on so…”

Steve takes off his collar and stretches his neck  “Every omega that works in the hospital has to put a collar on during his shift, you never know what could happen with some alpha patients. Sometimes they get violent and try to bite the omegas. But god if it’s uncomfortable!” He complains.

“For real?”

“Yeah. You know. Pain is a strong emotion and sometimes it takes out the instinctual part of some individuals.”

“Steve?!” someone calls and the omega turns.

For a moment Eddie sees a black mark on Steve’s neck, but then his attention is all on the alpha that is growling at the omega.

“You are such a slut.” the unknown alpha yells, throwing a paper bag at Steve “I made you a fucking sandwich! Your favorite! Because I thought you were too tired after a night shift! And you are here?! Having fun with another alpha?!”

The omega mewls “It’s not like that, Tommy, he is a patient and…”

“Is that so? I thought that you were supposed to wear a collar when you were with alpha patients! Why are you not wearing it, uh? Are you offering him yourself? Is that what you do when you are at work?!” the alpha growls, but Eddie growls back, pushing Steve behind him.

“What the fuck are you doing, man! We were just having coffee!”

“You were having a coffee with my omega!”

“I see no bite!”

“Well, this could be arranged, you know?” and then Tommy pushes Eddie away and throws himself at Steve, trying to bite his mating gland.

The omega whines, but Tommy manages to scruff him and he is almost biting Steve when Eddie punches him in the face.

After that, everything is a blur.

When Eddie comes back to his senses he is tied in a hospital bed and a policeman is sitting next to him.

“I’m Chief Hopper. Nurse Harrington told us what happened but I’d like to take your statement too.”

Eddie nods and explains to him what happened.

“The omega is not going to press charges. Are you?”

Why the fuck is he not pressing charges?!

“Everyone in the cafeteria testified that you were protecting the omega so you could press charges if you wanted to.”

There is something in the way the police officer is talking to him that makes him think that he should.

But in the end, he decides not to.

It’s Robin who comes back to discharge him a few hours later.

“How is he?”

“Steve?”

Eddie nods.

“He is resting. It was a hard day but we are understaffed and he knows that.”

“Can I see him?” he asks and Robin seems unsure, while she bites her lip, but then she gives him directions toward the room where Steve is resting.

“I’m up, I’m up!” Steve says, jumping on the bed as soon as Eddie opens the door, ready to get back to work.

“Sorry. Just me. I wanted to be sure you were ok.”

“Oh, Eddie. Hi. I’m fine. Yeah. Thanks for the help…”

“When I see fragile things, helpless things, broken things… I see something familiar.” he tells him, sitting on Steve’s cot “My parents were junkies so I lived in a trailer with my uncle. I’m no Prince Charming but I know how you should treat a person and how you should not.”

“You mean an omega.” Steve clarifies.

“You are more than your designation, Steve. And you deserve someone better than that piece of shit!” 

In the dim light of the room, something is shining on Steve’s neck.

“What are you looking at?” the omega asks.

“Your neck…”

“Oh, yeah, it looks bad but it’s just my soulmark.”

“It’s shining.”

“Is it what?!” Steve gets up and runs towards the bathroom. Now that Eddie can see it better he understands exactly what that is: a guitar pick.

He lowers the waist of his pants and sees something shining too.

“Are you a prince, Steve?”

Steve turns and looks at him astonished “At… at school. They called me King Steve. To mock me.”

“Well… I’m a guitarist. And I really think that I’m your fated soulmate.”

[causenessus]

HELLO!! okay lowkey i feel like we talk more through your inbox than we do in dms so im just gonna start ALWAYS talking here 🙂‍↕️ idk tumblr dms just don't work or something so GOOD AFTERNOON!! I HOPE YOURE GETTING A TON OF REST NESS bc tomorrow... we have to go back... sigh. and i have picture day tomorrow so i probably need to make myself look presentable ykwim?? 😞

but like about that friend i yapped about HIGHKEY SHE IS NOT IT YOURE RIGHT!!!! i think what makes it worse is whenever she thinks theres an issue between her and me and she goes to literally everyone but me about it to try to get other people to validate her?? FUNNIEST THING EVER because usually people side w me too pls 💔 like they'll defend me, and the people usually tell me when she starts yapping about it to them so like... just wondering why she feels the need to tell everyone in the world about what i apparently did wrong ⁉️ live laugh love i suppose... AND IF YOU EVER WANNA HEAR ABOUT STUFF THAT SHES DONE TO ME I LITERALLY HAVE STORIES FOR DAYS

ALSO!!!! IM SO EXCITED IM FINALLY GONNA GET MY DRIVER'S PERMIT AND START DRIVERS ED AAAA like ive been waiting for ages!!!! i had to like save up and stuff so it took a bit CAUSE WHY IS IT LIKE 400 DOLLARS IF YOU DONT TAKE IT THROUGH THE SCHOOL LIKE PLEASE 💔

its been days and the try again playlist is literally the only thing pulling me through... ness im forever grateful for the existence of this playlist‼️try again isnt even finished but like NESS i would marry it if i could i think i think about it even more than love notes omf 😭 i need yn as my therapist NOWWW!!! AND ADDING ONTO THAT, TONICS LOOKS SO AMAZING SO FAR OH MY GOD?? LIKE ALL THE DETAILS AND THE GRAPHIC DESIGN FOR ARTIST PROFILES AND EVERYTHING UGHH IM SO EXCITED

okay another thing, i think i told you about a phone vault before cause like my school was really talking it up... it was the stupid pocket thing on the wall. they're out there calling it a phone vault GOODBYE 😭 anyway ive given up on paying full attention in class and have reverted back to wearing and airpod in class so i can listen to music (the SOLE reason why i have airpods is bc they were a christmas gift i dont have enough money to buy those on my own 🫡)

ANYWAY I HOPE YOURE HAVING AN AMAZING DAY LOVE!! MAKE SURE YOU EAT, DRINK WATER, AND TAKE YOUR MEDS LATER!! <33 ILY

HELLO SAV!! AND PLEASE TALK WHEREVER U WANT!! I WILL RESPOND WHEREVER <3 and omg good luck with picture day!! 😭 literally those pics never turn out good like they PURPOSELY WANT ME TO LOOK BAD they're always like "no no!! push your hair out of your face behind your shoulder so we can really see how much of an egg you look like!!" but i'm wishing you the best of luck and that your picture turns out well 😔

and also HELLO??? I'M SO GLAD EVERYONE TAKES YOUR SIDE BC LIKE,, THAT'S JUST EMBARASSING FOR HER 😭 I HOPE SHE TAKES IT AS A SIGN AND REALIZES LIKE...maybe she's in the wrong...or maybe she should go to you and sort it out with you!! instead of just complaining about it to others!!

AND AA YAY GOOD FOR YOU!! it's def expensive but so so worth it in the end 😭😭 i remember for me (idk if every state does this!!) but i actually did my lessons when i was like 16 1/2 (for many reasons we won't get into 😔) but anyway!! in my state or at least at the drivers ed school i went to if you were that age they'd allow you to do this thing where basically they just threw all the information you'd learn over the course of the week (or however long all the drivers ed courses are) in one night crash course style!! and then u take the permit test at the end of it and then u get ur permit!! and although i felt a little behind everyone else bc i didn't start drivers ed immediately yk i was kind of glad i got it all done in one night!! and like you learn all the info and then IMMEDIATELY take a test on it so it was kind of easy!! but best of luck to u!! i hope it all goes well <3

AND AA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! I'M SO GLAD YOU LOVE THE TRY AGAIN PLAYLIST!! i always listen to it in the morning when i'm still waking up and then will switch to the tonics playlist when i'm more awake LMAOO BUT YES!! DW i think now that i've gotten tonics intros out of the way i'm gonna work on try again while trying to outline tonics!!

BUT HELLO THE "PHONE VAULT" BUT BEING THE SHOE HANGER THING?? MAN THAT IS NOT A VAULT 😭 THE WAY SCHOOLS ARE OUT HERE COMING OUT WITH THE CRAZIEST NAMES EVER JUST SO THAT IT LIKE FITS THE AESTHETIC OF THEIR SCHOOL OR WHATEVER IS CRAZY but yes!! i think my wireless earbuds were also a christmas gift or something and then during this one play during high school that was literally the bane of my existence (and also simultaneously the best play i ever did) i NOT ONLY lost my earbuds but i ALSO bit my phone on accident and then broke the screen so like...i sacrificed blood sweat and tears for that play frfr (i also bled all over the set after cutting my finger on accident so i mean it...) so i had to buy myself another pair after that bc my mom was sick of me 😭😭 but they were like an off brand pair and tbh they're better than like samsung buds!! (what i have to use bc i'm not an apple user </3) so honestly it worked out in the end!!

BUT I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY AS WELL!! THANK YOU SO MUCH SAV <3 HAVE A LOVELY DAY AND REST LOTS AND TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!

[messybouquetoflilies]

This wasn't the reason before, but after seeing your new dumb post my new reason is because you think you aren't "safe" around Trump supporters. You are a clear victim to fear porn if you believe that. Trump and Harris are both liars, frauds, and puppets for a corrupt system, but Trump supporters (for the most part) are amazingly wonderful people (other than their blind allegiance to an actor playing his part, just like Harris plays hers). The vast majority do not care if you're a faggot pretending to be a girl, they just want you to stop guilting, shaming, and trying to force everyone else to play pretend with you (as well as supporting the indoctrination and grooming of children). If you want to live inside your imagination, then by all means go ahead, but that doesn't mean the rest of the world needs to play along with your delusions or be quiet with their opinions.

Regardless of what you think of this message, I want to implore you not to give in to fear. If you live a life centered around love, then you have nothing to be afraid of. If you turn people into monsters inside your head, then of course that's what you'll see when you look at them, regardless of the reality in front of you.

Get off Tumblr. Get off the internet. Breathe fresh air. Walk on grass. TALK to people face to face and live inside the real world. You're killing your soul by spending so much time online, drowning in toxic, hateful ideologies. Thinking with your dick instead of your heart. I'm pretty sure you don't believe you have a soul, anyway, which is just further proof you're destroying yourself. Why else would someone get off to being beaten and abused? Being treated like a dog? You have no self-worth and you want everyone else to be just as miserable as you. You don't love yourself, so how can you ever expect anyone else to love you? All you'll ever find is people who get off to the idea of fucking and hurting the costume you choose to attach yourself to. Your entire life is the way it is because you don't take accountability for anything. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. You are on the wrong path. In ten years when you're in the exact same spot, wondering why things are so bad for you, why people cut you out of their lives, questioning what you could have done differently, feeling alone and unlovable, still staring at your computer screen and wishing things would change, still pretending like it's the world's fault and not your own, I hope you remember this anon and start making the right choices for yourself. You're a man. Get your shit together and act like one. Then once you've finally learned to love yourself as you are and you straighten out the mess of your life, by all means - act like the dumbest, prettiest lil' puppy bitch you wanna be behind closed doors. Separate reality from fantasy instead of trying to merge them into one. You will NEVER find happiness if you carry on how you have been. The only people who will love you are the ones who are happy to keep you sick and mentally ill so long as that means they never have to face their own demons.

it really is the most boring piece of shit little worm answers from people like you lol. crazy you tell me im on this website too much when you literally respond to my posts within minutes. someones obsessed 😇

why is it always the same speech 😔 cant you loser pieces if shit come up w something new and interesting to say? ive heard this before. you're wrong. there you go, thats my argument. it has just about the same level of depth and introspection as the 9 paragraphs you just sent. you get to see one side of me on the internet with no context and you think you can say all that. get a life

spending your free time sending personalized, anons to a blog in a dark corner of the internet that averages 1 note a post, and then telling them they spend too much time on the website is psycho behavior. get help, and make actual friends im begging you.

you're weird and gross for thinking like this. stop trying to control other people you know nothing about, and do a lil work on urself. look into your own beliefs and the sources you're getting your entertainment and information from. get some perspective in life and stop wasting your time being such a sad, boring, loser <3

[pumpkinland]

I try not to talk about weight or weight loss too much bc it can trigger a lot of people and i want to be respectful of that and also because when the topic comes up it inevitably invites people who think they've cracked the secret to weight management that works for everyone and if you struggle it's because you're lazy or stupid and just don't understand that what works for everyone else works for you too, you just don't have enough willpower or discipline and your weight is a moral failing (lol) but the thing is like

when i say i am trying to lose weight i feel like most people don't understand that i literally do not have a regimen or a nutrition plan or anything that's off limits, or any kind of restrictions, or literally anything i literally just kind of vibe and go with the flow. like i try to just make sure i feel ok at all times and be conscious of how often i indulge in treats and reign it in sometimes and let loose others. and i feel like it has been working for me bc my goal is to just gradually eat better and move more. it's just like to make progress over what i did yesterfay, what i did last month, what i did 6 months ago, etc, until i get to a point where ive gone from a shit diet to a decent one, without shocking my body or myself in the process and creating something unsustainable that isn't going to last. and like. for me. FOR ME. this has been working. ive lost 20 lbs this way. it wasn't fast though.

and what really really REALLY sucks is that THIS is what "lifestyle changes" means. changing your lifestyle is jarring and difficult to adapt to esp if you do it all at once. but the thing is it's still difficult to talk about bc you have people in one hand who were so hurt by diet culture as to become victims of eating disorders (through no fault of their own) who now find it triggering to discuss weight management at all (rightfully so). on the other hand you have people who are or were lucky that conventional diet wisdom worked for them, and now believe that if you're not thin it's because you just didn't try hard enough and don't have the mental fortitude or moral toughness and that being fat is your punishment for failing to be virtuous and disciplined.

those people will usually hear what im doing and seem upset that not only is it working for me, that i don't go to the gym 5 days a week and eat vegetables for 85% of my meals and im still losing weight, but they seem to feel like i should be punished for daring to feel comfortable on my journey, rather than punishing myself and pushing myself as hard as i can and restricting my calories and using exercise as a punishment instead of a reward or a treat, and they always jump really hard on me when i say how much ive lost and they find out how long it took, they're like well that's not good enough. that took you too long. if you were doing it right you'd lose it faster. so then it becomes well ok sure you lost 20 lbs but that's not good enough... you're being lazy, you should have done that faster. you'd be thinner right now if you weren't so lazy. and so instead of celebrating the victory with me, of losing 20 lbs, which is not a small amount to lose no matter what anyone tries to tell you! the minimize it and belittle it because a fat person should never be comfortable when it comes to weight, they should always feel shame for what they have done (be fat) and punish themselves as much as it takes to repent (become thin). and it's just like.

dude. im not christian. I'm just fat.

[lunakatz]

what to do when best friend starts running a cult and kidnaps my sister and lies to me and manipulates me but like i still care about her but like want her gone but like at the same time id be so sad because last time she died i was sobbing for like forever and mourning and now im the one whos gonna K1LL her but like thats illegal so no but at the same time yes because shes evil and i want the best for the people around me but also she matters more then the people here because ive known her since elementary and also everyone else has also committed like various crimes before so it dont matter but like i feel betrayed so its different

or is that just me being selfish

or is that me being smart is this the smarter option or is this just my instinct or something

maybe im in the wrong and i shouldnt do anything about it but she’s manipulating snd brainwashing so many innocent people and making them bad

but i also hate those people

because my whole life ive been fairly stupid and all but these people are so incredibly STUPID to think that this guy isnt cheerio my best friend

like why not its so obvious hes literally on stilts most of the time and has a freaking voice changer on AND hides his face

why hide your face if youre “god” ? because if you were god, you wouldn’t need to anyway because you can do anything you want,meaning you wouldnt be in danger if someone saw your face.

so why

why do these people think otherwise why do they not believe me??? i’ve done everything i could to try and help, including telling close family members and friends about it, and people in the cult, but it just doesn’t work. no one believes me. lucky believed me, i think.. but i dont know… fish doesn’t believe me and i dont know why.

all of this never helped

im trying to protect the others from him, but its just not working???

so theres only one thing left i believe

i have to kill cheerio

maybe once shes dead they wont be brainwashed anymore?

i dont even know man

i miss my wife

hey cheerio if you see this can you quit it or else i kill

thank

[predacon-carrion]

Log #4:

Now that I'm thinking back to how this specific individual was. I can only describe him and his ugly, red colored..paintjob and even uglier, putrid personality as millions upon millions of things, his voice sends shivers down my spine. He is also the one thing I despise the most on this stupid ship! He is Obnoxious, Annoying, Vain, Apathetic, Manipulative, Disgusting. Anything and everything negative your mind can think of, that's what he is! I absolutely despise him and I sincerely hope he gets humbled in the best possible way, if I had the opportunity to just destroy him, I would most definitely take it..as long as I don't die. But with..Carri..gosh, where do I even start with Him, I am deathly afraid of him yet I like him at the exact same time..I vividly remember the sweet moments Ive had with him, he has proven many times that he is trustworthy, but sometimes I just get this unease and wonder if..he would turn on us eventually. I know it's a stupid thought to have after all, but considering the questionable things he's.. done, and factoring in how He's making up for his actions. But don't pretend like you've never been afraid of someone just turning their back on you, treating you as if you're nothing! It's not just him though, sometimes I feel as if its everyone else too. I am, quite paranoid about Dearling, sometimes it feels like she's the only one I can trust. Same with Compy and Glitch. It's an everyone feeling, but there's this lingering sense of fear I experience, that no matter what you do, everyone around you will find a way to turn their backs on you and throw you under the bus.

...

Aside from my own..personal problems. I'm going to have to leave something else in these vents as another marking. Because when it really comes down to it. Progress is progress, and I want to make sure to save it. I'm definitely risking my health by making doing the same exact thing I've done beforehand. But hey, who said it wouldn't be risky...

I'm definitely not making it out of here without contracting a cold.

﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀﹀

They stopped in their tracks, looking ahead of themselves as they saw an opening that didn't lead them back to the Habsuite they were oh-so-familiar with

Wait...Is that? Their eyes widened I knew it! These vents aren't endless after all, I finally see it! An outside area I'm unfamiliar with! I must've hit the jackpot! They said, excitedly.

They proceed to gaze outside, gazing at their surroundings in absolute awe, finally they were surrounded by anything but the expanding and hollow walls of the vents I wish I had a camera on me right now...

They mumbled, before placing their last blanket down, sitting on it and jotting down their surroundings and the paths they have taken within the vent that lead them to where they were now. Finally relieved that they weren't traversing these vents for nothing and that all of their hard work and sacrifice didn't go to waste.

≈STS

.

[gayspock]

whilst i cannot sleep

is anyonegetting angry and upset in their own head is anyone feelign hateful is anyone going nuts knowing it never gets anywhere that it never means anythingi keepgetitng really. really fucking angry. walk around try not to be sick fucking calm down breathe br normaallll!!!! and upset thinking abt how fucking stupid it is that i keep getitng angry andupset. when ive been trying actively not to care about it because caring doesnt mattereither and nothing matters but i cant fucking shake it. gorgeous spiral because it jsut fucking goes round in circles and it never stops and i feel like half this shit its like peopelwont even remember any more but i cant ever fucking get it out of my head and i wishthere was some fucking closurebut i dont fucking ever move i keep trying to fucking push shit forward dbutr im always jsut fucking stuck. everyone just fucking leaves and goesd on like it never happened or mattered. and idontknow whyi everjust sit there and theres this niggling fucking . ache forsoemthing just some fucking acknowledgement . like i dont want apologies i dont fucking care i dont think its even due just fucking realise i existed just for a second pleaseand my head was jsut .slightly fucked up by thsi but i feel selfish and stupid and childish and its just a fucking pipedreamgod help me but no . imstill fucking stuck as i always am and i cant get out andit doesnt fucking matter how hard i try im alwya sjust never doing enough for anything.igenuinely do fucking try to move on try to fucking do somethingelse and i jsut fucking cant fucking get anywhetre and if eel so so fucking . stupid and theresnothing there but the hollow fucking tauntssaying its going to be okay one day! and then the prompt walking away from your fucking corpse haha ! when theres nothing in sight and i its stupid fucking horseshit selectiverly designed todrvie you so, so fucking angry but youre not allowed to fucking say anything without being the cunt yourenot allowed to react you have to fucking swallow it fucking perform for people who do not fucking care or respect you truly like HAHA. YOURE DOING THIS TO YOURSELF! IF YOU SAY YOURE OKAY FOR ME! YOU WILL THEN BE OKAY! NOW SAY IT! some fuckingsong and dance to make them feel betterdespite youre . fucking . insane and even if you didnt exist this would have no fucking bearing on them whatsoever but oh sure fucking fine fuck OFF do you ever fucking think aboit that i wish i could be fucking miserable for fucking once because i cant ufcking do anyhting else i really fucking cant and i wish someonewould just fucking let me be for fucking once i feel so so so fucking alone i jsut . befrore i finsihmyself off i dont know. . i keep triyng and i wish justr something could get some sort of fucking resolution for once or some fucking release or end but i jsut feel like i cant ask for anything i feel fucking crazy man i feel fucking crazy all the fucking time i feel like imgetitng my shit yanked back and forth . something smehying its never fucking worth being alive i keep sitting there and praying for it to matter to fucking have meant something but i cant fidn a fucking point to any of it im so so fucking sick of it im sick of exisitign but i sut. wahh wahh wahh or whatever i wish i couldfeel happy i wish i could feel loved or just feel liek ive done something okay jsut for fucking ocne before i die idont think im ever going to get there i cant i just keep criyng about all the meaningles nothinhs that keep coming in droves but are just more fucking shortcomins and disappointments and FUCKKKK MY LIFESS<333333

[bachikinmo4]

Nothing is fun to me anymore rlly. (Rant under cut)

I always feel either scared or unimportant around people id consider my friends. I hope they consider me my friends. I want to talk to people more and hang out more but i always feel scared and anxious that im gonna mess it up. Many times have i talked to people and came out of it feeling like i chose all the wrong dialogue options in a game. I just want to be liked and appreciated without having to ask or beg for it or initiate it myself. Its selfish of me to say that yes but what can i do. You cant be selfless all the time in this stupid baka world.

I have this one group i play games with. We roleplay while playing and make up our own story. But ive noticed that its so fucking biased to one person. They always have the most drastic plot developments, most insane shit happening to them, the spotlight is always on them like theyre the main character. Idk how the others feel about it but the plot almost never circles around them as much as it does to that guy. Maybe theyre used to it as this isnt the first rp campaign theyve done. Im not and i dont like it, it should be a even group effort and not leaning to one character.

Theres also this one person, i dont hate them at all, but they are always so unnecessarily angry all the time, especially when i ask a question about something i dont know. Not my fucking fault that im new to this and dont know as much as you, stop yelling at me. "They just explained it to you!" Well what if i didnt fucking understand . Then what. You got a problem with me wanting clarification? Or needing something complex explained? God forbid. They also get angry at things other than me or the game but it still makes me uncomfortable and scared. It makes me not want to play with that group anymore if everyone's just gonna be purposefully vague, get mad at me or something else, or add confusing plots and details and inside jokes i dont understand. I dont understand almost any of the inside jokes and references bc i didnt hang out with that group long enough and i feel like a total outcast and tourist to this friend group. But i dont want to police anything, thatd make them like me less. Im sorry.

I feel like an outcast to any group tbf. Im always a little too different from everyone. Im too young. Im too old. I like different things. I have different opinions. I value different things. It makes me feel hated and annoying and maybe im right in saying that. Maybe i am annoying. Im too weird. Im too anxious. I cant even ask someone i really like if they want to hang out with me and talk more. I fear disappointing them and scaring them off. I dont want to weird them out. Im a good person. I hope i am. We both are weird in our own regards but im scared ill be too much to them. Too annoying, too hard to talk with. Too hard to please, too hard to understand.

Too hard to be around with.

[daniels-rwby-blog]

RWBY x Justice Leauge comments

For my actual review see (https://www.tumblr.com/daniels-rwby-blog/715604149128118272/this-is-pretty-much-what-ive-got-to-say-except?source=share)

This is just a lil something else:

I gotta say the animation and shots for this movie are awesome, like casually talking everyone has great fluidness and physics, and as "rwbyed" as JL's costumes are they move well for a RWBY episode. I mean it's nothing like V9 but it's more than on par with V8 or v7. At 54:15 as Weiss and Bruce fight the Grimm and the bees and wonder woman show up, Yang's jump punch is amazing and her hair is better than anything we've seen before.

Plus immediately after in the super fun anxiety closet with Jaune and Jessica, the framing as the crumbles from the walls moving in and FX and smoke is great.

Then at 56:07 as yang asks weiss what's going on, her hand (yeah ik it gets explained if you watch the film) on Blake, is amazingly well done, and Dina's little effects are hilarious, the way the animation and blocking shows how the JL adjust to being teens as stupid a plot point as that is, it looks great.

Which is not something I would have thought to say about RWBY 7 or 8 years ago.

As for plot, this obviously is not canon. It's like a really good fanfic and i like it that way, but the ending and the way team RWBY interact make it seem like it fits, near enough into mid V7 likely before the Schnee dinner and just after becoming licensed huntsmen. 

Firstly the way the bees act is how I would expect them to act in order for Blakes flirting to make sense in V9. 

Coming out of the end of V6 Blake knows yang is important to her, i don't think she has love in mind just yet but as we see during v7's bee scenes they care about each other a lot more now, we see this Blake jumping in to be by yang's side and reassuring Yang as she fights in the air with Dianna, things she will do again in the ponder-storm in V9, as she guides yang to the confession of a decade that is 🐝.

Meanwhile yang while coming around to Blake, hasn't latched on just yet, she knows when she's pushing blakes buttons and clearly cares what Blake thinks of her (they haven't confessed so yang still thinks what she thought on the bridge likely worse as well) but she isn't as connected or as longing to be by blakes side, a s Blake is for her.

However, like blakes shy and closed off shadowy character now being ready for joking and even flirting, following Adams death. Yang also feels more relaxed understanding Blake more and being open to a bit more flirtatious activity, but still gets stun locked by wonder woman, cause she doesn't realize yet that what she and Blake has is love.

This all makes sense for the show leading up to this point and what follows in V9

The reason V9 is so open, particularly from Blake, is that she realizes the slow burn she had with yang was taking Yang for granted and falling off the world made her realize that and start going in strong. She is determined to get everything she can out of this relationship and she will never take it for granted again. 

When the ponder storm hits SHE, guides the normally headfirst yang into the confession, while allowing yang to come to her own conclusions (hence i think qualifying from yang only)

Additionally by this point Renora hasn't kissed yet, i mean Nora and Ren have a lot more history, they had all of V4,V5,V6, V7 to get over beacon and start relationships again, compared to the V6 wonder that was the bees getting together again.

Renora in the film sees a third party, unlike the one off remark on wonder woman that number one dark haired ladies simp Yang had, cyborg pushes Ren out of his comfort zone a bit by heading for Nora, ultimately this doesn't lead to anything more than a misunderstanding but it shows that Ren while not making the first move in the kiss, at least knows that he wants to be with Nora, showing that ReNora was paced well for a V7 confirm.

As for Arkos? Well i don't think I need to explain Arkos and its timing. 

And no, I will not talk about WR.

Alright that's it from me on the movie, I'll keep saying some stuff (watched it 7 times now woooo) 

But that's about all there is to it, it looks pretty, it makes the ships make more sense if it were Cannon.

Again I'm not saying it's canon, but this is what I'd expect from V7 Blake and Yang and V7 ReNora if placed in this situation when their characters were at the stage they should be for the kisses to make sense.

I'd highly recommend The Beethis by @bees-shitposting

For more on why bumblebee isn't coming out of nowhere, remember stay chill y'all

And DFTBA!

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Its the end of the year! Which means its time to post the

Tags That Made Me Smile 2022

The following are a collective list of tags, author notes, and fic names that i saw on ao3 and tumblr that made me either laugh or smile. Ive separated them by fandom but a good amount arent actually fandom specific. Ive added the character names or fandom at the end like {name} to clarify who the tag is talking about

[2021's list]

Author Specific / Non-Specific

i saw canon; acknowledged it; And promply burned it in a dirty trash can thanks; Have this instead

Give me pain I need to feel something

this is self projection thank you coming to my ted talk

Whats that?? Overused tropes that everyone has seen before????? Pfffffffft. This fic is literally just a big mess of "how can I cater to myself and myself only"

you ever just look at your life and wonder how you got here; bc that's what this fic is for me

Don't underestimate me I DO NOT know how long this fan-fic will be

can you tell my target audience is myself

this is content specifically catered to me and no one else

these characters are my landlords and i pay them rent

P O L Y A M O R Y   I S   M Y   P O L Y J A M O R Y

cheek kiss warning

kidnapping isn’t sexy don’t do it

i've never read the archie comics but that's not gonna stop me {archie sonic}

not me writing a whole fic for a ship only i care about; that like maybe two other people ship; rowing this boat is hard but someone has to do it {scourge x fleetway sonic}

ankles don't heal this fast but fuck it i do what i want

no beta we die like men; or rather we drown like the sad shipper with a pool noodle we are

I'm afraid of the Danimals mascot and you should be too

if you're getting flood warnings, don't worry. It's just MY TEARS!

me at every character: anxiety be upon ye

Me (Grabs canon and runs a marathon with it)

Quote: Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created (Spy Kids) {tmnt crossover}

Alternate Universe - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

contains dangerous amount of bed based snuggling

(kind of its a very short very homosexual fight scene); and then they kiss.

Hostage situation takes a romantic turn???? Not clickbait????

enemies to frenemies

Improper Use of Pool Noodles

stone cold stoicism meeting determined stupidity

Star Wars

Kanan Jarrus: The Daddening

platonic love is what healed his lonely existence {din djarin}

when in doubt: road trip with the besties {din, boba, fennec}

Soul Eater

found family at its finest {kid, liz, patty}

The Witcher

wife (platonic) {yennskier}

at first I was like haha geralt and Istredd should kiss as a joke…. but bro I don’t think it’s a joke anymore….

Sonic the Hedgehog

Movie!Super Sonic is made out of LOVE no one touch me

Sonics gay awakening I guess

sonic movie 2 made me make an ao3 account lol

Sonic was made to love people

Two Bros Chillin’ in an ER Five Feet Apart ‘cause they’re not gay {sonic x shadow}

the most dangerous thing is to love {shadow}

Trapped in a small box with just enough room to face some feelings {sonic x shadow}

the R in rivalry stand for romance {sonic x shadow}

The L in Rivalry Stands For 'Love' {sonic x shadow}

A Largely Platonic Cave

i love boom!shadow so naturally i made him even more insufferable

Sad-ow

Wachowskis holdin it down in the bg; Absolute champs

I love how Shadow is just so mindbogglingly utterly done with reality

Knuckles is a guardian of all things great and small

“Would you kiss a worm?" “If he was cute as fuck? Yeah.” {wade x stone}

"What is this made of, bendable titanium?!" "INCORRECT. IT IS MADE OF THE FRUSTRATIONS OF MOTHERS EVERYWHERE." {team dark}

featuring a scourge that trips far too much because it's my fic and I said so {scourge x fleetway sonic}

no thoughts just soft hedgehog moments

listen if im going to die at the hands of injured lancelot shit i might as well take advantage of it

Everyone has a crush on Lancelot and I'll die on this hill

fairy Lancelot Fairy Lancelot FAIRY LANCELOT!!!

TMNT

Slow Burn; mostly on april's end of things; casey and donnie are basically on fire right off the bat {tmnt 2012}

Rise!Donnie and 2012!Casey be out there committing arson together for their first date >.>

Please enjoy Casey, the fool, realizing his feelings for Donnie, another fool {tmnt 2012}

Draxum and Splinter are the turtles' dads (it's a reluctant partnership)

just two absolute powerhouses holding each other gently {raph x mona}

“There’s nothing wrong with the way you love, Dee. Goodnight.” {rottmnt}

Wondering what to do when the apocalypse happens? Easy: fly across the country and get Vegas-married. That's definetley an appropriate reaction that won't involve your complicated feelings towards your roommate at all {hypno x warren}

Look rise are weapons of war 12 were accidents and I play with that HARD in this fic

"GET IN THE TURTLE TANK BITCHES WE GOING TO FAMILY THERAPY" {rottmnt}

Donatello is now Dad-Atello {rottmnt}

The other [Casey] is out on a beach in Tahiti; It's what he deserves after surviving the Krang {rottmnt}

Leo is now actively being hunted for sport; (the only sport Donnie is good at) {rottmnt}

These turtles can fit so much trauma

2018 Karai lives because fuck Nick; Casey x Donnie x April are a healthy ship and also fuck nick again

I cant be the only one pissed by Leo's and Karais 'love interest plot'; Leonardo's weird feelings were simply gender envy...Yes that is canon now {tmnt 2012}

What happens when two "dudes" call each other 'girlfriend'; Transgender activities, that's what! {tmnt 2012}

splinter is twice divorced and never married {rottmnt}

Papatello / Dadatello {rottmnt}

draxum's gone from dadxum to grand-dadxum good for him

HOLY FUCKING SHIT YES YES YES YES; GRANDPA BARRY COMING IN CLUTCH

draxum just be like gramps still got it; and by 'it' i mean a complete lack of forethought for care when creating random children

Puts the Bi in Bitchless {rottmnt leo}

its because ninja turtles

feral mamatello {rottmnt}

Marvel

it's the anguish, the self flagellation, the audacity to love the man who annihilate ur nation and killed ur mother; your m o t h e r {black panther}

[despite-everything]

i feel like every time i finally feel at peace about going no-contact with my mother something happens again that makes it sickening and one of the hardest things i've done.

i don't think i've ever burst into tears like this before. i dont even cry that often but im just really fucking going through it tonight. my mother texted me photos of the land she's bought down in central texas to build a ranch house on. when i was a kid, my grandparents had ranches. my grandmother was raised on one, too, and its gone back in our family. so i grew up on the ranch for holidays, long weekends, and portions of the summer. when my grandmother died and my parents divorced when i was a preteen, i went with my dad and my connection with that side of the family was almost severed because of my mothers tendency to spread lies and rumors which made me and my father unwelcome. a few years ago, the ranch became public property which is something im grateful for, but its weird to go back and visit, and i live nowhere near there anymore.

i basically went no-contact with my mother two years ago when she used my grandfather's death against me in a really terrible way. that was my grandfather who ranched. i long to be back in central texas. i feel so at home there. but im trans and unless i get one of a few very specific jobs (probably in austin) i wont go back and that breaks my fucking heart. my mother still texts me sometimes, and i havent blocked her because ive been informed of major family news from her even though i cant respond. she bought some land a few months ago and is building on the property and is going to move back to texas. she sent me update photos of the land tonight as well as a story about a beautiful coyote skeleton picked clean by buzzards on the property. i was the family member who collected bones from the ranch. i genuinely burst into tears when i saw the photos.

and then she followed up by talking about how she intends to build a small ranch house and a small guest house for friends and family to feel welcome and visit. and i just can't stop crying. that's all i've ever wanted. my grandparents had several ranches, but sold them. they asked every other person in the family if they'd be willing to take it over and manage it except for me - the one person who had always wanted to do that. but no one asked me and it was at a tumultuous time in my parents marriage so i didnt know until years later and too late. and theres almost no chance in hell i could ever afford property like that unless i inherit. and since all the ranches were sold and my grandparents are dead, i don't think that will ever happen to me. the ranch they lived on was The Ranch in the sense that it had a guest cabin and enough space for family to visit and at holidays there'd be 12-15 of us. i fucking miss that so much and theres no way to get it back and i know that but the fact that my mother is managing to re-create that same thing and i can't be part of it without hurting myself immensely is so sickening to me.

like i feel like im rambling and just sound stupid or ungrateful or something but its like ive been coming to terms with the fact that i'll never have an intact family again and im never going to have access to "home" unless i create one from scratch and i miss living in texas even with the bad parts and i miss the ranch and my family and this woman who has hurt me so fucking much suddenly gets to have this amazing life where she's becoming the new family matriarch and creating a place for everyone to gather and be happy hurts so so so much. im scared i will forgive her. ive cut her off then accepted her back before and it only made things worse. if i know whats good for me i'll stay away. but it's like the thing i've wanted more than anything else in the entire world is being dangled in front of me but if i accept it i might as well kill myself.

[darkclouud9]

okay Secret Life's over and I've only watched Cleo and Skizz's finales.

but I wanna rank the seasons just bc.

Secret Life is honestly 1 for me. it had my favourite alliances yet, I loved the Cletho + Grian team (I refuse to call them 'Roomies'), the Heart Foundation was amazing, the Mounders were pretty cool, I actually really enjoyed Lizzie and Scar being alone, no matter how sad it was. Big Dogs were amazing actually, one of the best pairings, most fun base in all the seasons just off the top of my head :]

but I have to say. first half of the season was my absolute favourite. silly tasks, BigB gaslighting everyone, Lizzie, Mumbo, Jimmy alive, etc etc. it's probably up until the episode they die where it felt like it decreased in enjoyment for me. the zombie apocalypse task was ehhhh, the vibe was cool, very LL energy, but I overall didn't like it all that much (I understand and appreciate it still, but the whole cancelling out other tasks was sad :[)

the vibes of this finale seem... weird.

and you might say I have no place to say that, having only watched two finales and getting spoiled on who the winner is yet again, but I personally didn't enjoy it. everyone felt extremely rushed and fumbled so hard. Joel in particular on his Skizz kill. Cleo didn't get a chance to defend herself, and neither did Etho, and presumably Grian. all the group ups felt off to me. I feel like the Heart Foundation should've stuck more to Cletho + Grian, they all could've done a bit better them I feel.

the massive group of people just sticking together and killing everyone else was a bit ehhh to me, but as Cleo put it, they'd have to kill each other eventually (ive watched it twice and I can't remember exactly what they say. I am a failure :[)

second is Last Life, I was insane over Team BEST for a while, but I'm more insane over Team TIES now (I have reasons I won't say teehee)

Mumbo and Lizzie are here!! they're cool!!

loved the mechanics for this season. boogeyman was very cool, and the random life count was epic. favourite mechanics actually.

lot of favourite deaths, Impulse's final death was pretty cool to me, betrayal deaths make me bite the bars of my cage, not looking at anyone in particular *ahem* BigB, Martyn's stupid yellow(?) death, Scar and BigB's final deaths were insane (Operation Bubblevator!!)

Fairy Fort was an insane alliance I never was that big on them when this season was active, but hooooollllly hell these guys. (Do me a favour. Die for me.)

the music disk, Etho freaking everyone out with it. the "Bogeyman", Southlands. Southlands just in general.

episode 6...........................

the final 8 survivors (-one. you know who they are they won it.) Pearl's boogey kill, her protecting Cleo, Joel's double kill, the final 2 battles. ough. this season had everything man. I hate the cold and winter but the wintery vibes of this season were immense and I loved it so much (no thanks to the Snow Fort...)

a lot of the final yellow kills were cool, in particular Etho and Cleo dying together, in the same order (twice in a row!!). Etho trying so hard to at least kill Ren before Pearl killed him is one of the most memorable moments for me.

and Mumbo screaming as Etho fishing rods him up into the air. and then the dogs.

and the lotion throw at the beginning of session 6.

and Lizzie's first death after failing to kill her husband. those are all extremely memorable moments :]

3L is next for almost no other reason than "nostalgia" purposes.

one thing I liked about this season was how innocent and pure everyone was.

idk about anyone else, but, except for its burning. s. I really enjoyed the Wool Castle. the swamp. and Etho trying to become Shrek or something. what was up with them

my favourite character from this season was undoubtedly Joel though. I LOVED his base, his dead bushes, Cleo dying to his roof, his roof constantly burning. with him. his army of dogs. first dog boy. Gerald. ine. I feel like he forgets his red skin at some point in this season and I really enjoyed the skin changes between colors.

also feel like him n Cleo tease Renchanting for being so loyal to Ren. (oh my go d they're actually calling him king!)

4th is Limited Life.

listen. I feel like I should like this season more than I did. I was sort of falling out of the Life Series at this point so I don't have much to say let alone remember.

but let me tell you.

Skynet.

5th is Double Life.

another season I feel like I should've enjoyed more. I loved Team Ranchers at first, but the way everyone sort of treated them was... whatever, and them people talking about Boat Boys made me live Boat Boys (I didn't feel much for them at first, but oh my gosh) but those two are my top two pairings (I can't pick between them rn)

I have no hate for this season

Scar and his allay buddy, being oblivious to who his soulmate is, Mickey Mouse. Scar was a pretty fun character, plus all his skins for this season were really cool!! insane over them still

all the pairings were really cool, I loved the Divorce Quarter, the Vultures. they were cool, I loved how they just refused their fate. (and how Martyn literally killed himself. and how Cleo was the only person to have died all three times while Martyn was partially responsible for all of them in some way.)

the pillar outside the Midcentury Modern Home or something. the fishing rod party. (Joel and Etho's demise-) one thing I feel like was overlooked with them was that Scott was like. wrong. about them. sure having the both of them pulled up so they take double damage was stupid. but it was Joel. who. died. and took all of their hearts. Etho didn't even hit the ground. in fact I think he barely even left it.

also one thing that makes me bite and tear at my cage is that Etho and Joel were the pairing to have died at the midpoint. 3 pairings died before them. 3 pairings died after them. and, despite Joel losing their earlier 2 lives, Etho being the first to die on their final life splits them into top half and bottom half, with Etho being 8th this season, and Joel being 7th.

also the Ranchers' Warden was-