#Disney has completely lost the plot

[z0mbiechylde]

The Little Mermaid: A Pathetic Remake

[heliads]

Hey babe, if you're still taking requests, can I request something for Harry Hook from descendants? It takes place in an AU where basically all the kids are "chosen" to be parts of fairytales. (Think Ever After High mixed with School for Good and Evil). This world is complete with everything you see in disney movies with epic fights and songs. Heroes get love ballads and villains get traditional villain songs. Reader and Harry are friends (with feelings) on the isle and get chosen for a story, and are both super excited because they think they'll both be villains together. So imagine their surprise when they get their first song together and it sounds an awful lot like a love song.

This AU has been living in my head for a long time tbh but I have no writing skills T-T. Feel free to ignore it this is not your style or I accidentally sent this after requests closed.

'one story leads to another' - harry hook

masterlist

On the Isle of the Lost, a story is everything. Receiving a good story catapults a promising villain into a fantastic life of infamy, but a lackluster story seals your fate forever to menial satisfaction alone. Henchmen, not gods. Lackeys and thugs, never the criminal boss in charge.

Then again, a worse fate still could befall you. Many would-be villains go their whole lives without receiving a story. They’re not meant for everyone, at all, even if they mean the difference between a true life or a false existence. You can’t fathom training your whole life just to go without, but it’s the reality for many on your island. Even the deck swabbers get to go on exciting adventures with the great pirates of the sea, and even the lowliest prison guard will still live in a cursed palace.

The story controls your life, both literally and figuratively. Once you’re given a story, you’ll have no choice but to follow it out, even if it ends with your death. Then again, a story isn’t over in a matter of days. It’ll shape your life for decades. Even if the main plot is over, you’ll still be someone, and maybe you’ll feature in other people’s stories, too. There’s no way to make it without a story.

That’s why you’ve been throwing yourself into the pursuit of becoming the main character of your own story. You’ve perfected the arts of all things villain– sword fights that always end with you pulling a secret dagger out of a sleeve to tip the scales in your favor, maniacal laughter, elaborate plotting. You could scheme in your sleep or double-cross a traitor with your hands tied behind your back. Although it’s been a long time in the making, everyone on the Isle can admit that you’re the best of the best, and that a story surely has to be coming your way.

The problem, then, is attracting one. Although no rules are set in stone, there are expectations for how one’s story will come about. There will be an inciting event, of course, and then the songs will begin to appear in your head, the footwork and movements placed in your memories without a second thought. You’ll know you’re in the story, and then your life will change forever.

You’ve already seen one play out with some of your closest friends. Mal, one of your best friends since you were kids, got to live out her nefarious dreams, although even she didn’t see the twist coming in her story. Then again, becoming queen of Auradon is certainly a fine trophy for the child of a villain, even if a true marriage of love isn’t quite the way anyone expected her to steal the crown.

Mal has assured you many times over that your story will be coming too, it has to. There’s no way the magic would skip over you, not when you’ve dedicated so much of your life to being the perfect villain for any role. You can lie and cheat and maim with the best of them, surely you’re shaping up to be the arch nemesis in some hero’s grand journey? Your story will be coming your way. Surely. Surely.

And then, all of a sudden, it does. You feel it like a puppet knows its strings. All of a sudden, you have a purpose that you didn’t before. Your feet carry you out of the training yard and out into the sprawling mess of streets that makes up the Isle of the Lost. Your heart soars, and you take to the roofline, staring out at the world before you. It’s yours, all yours, and you know it’s true, so you sing it. The words come to you in a flash, perfect rhymes curling around your tongue as if they’d been there all your life. 

This is what it feels like to be in a story, then. It feels right, more right than anything you’ve known before. Easier than breathing. Simpler than hoping that something like this would come your way, and at last, it has. Nothing could make your flinty heart more proud.

The song ends, and you can hear a ghost of a distant chorus fading out as you make your way back to the ground once more. Your stroll is casual, but the steps are definitely in a specific direction. The last notes fade from the air, your feet stop firmly in place, and you realize that you’re not facing down a potential heist or daring escape but the end of the dock leading into the sea. Directly in front of you lies a pirate ship. 

At first, you’re thrilled– an adventure on the high seas would be fantastic. You’re friends with many of the pirates, even if you haven’t yet gotten a chance to test your fortitude against seasickness before. You cast your mind back to the words you’d just sung, trying to remember if you’d chorused anything about an exciting voyage ahead, or maybe the possibility of sunken treasure.

Instead, your heart sinks as you realize you were talking about exploring what was right in front of you. More specifically, someone right in front of you. And, as you stare with no small amount of trepidation at the pirate ship in front of you, you discover that someone else seems to be in a similar situation as you. Someone who’s just stopped singing a very similar song, who’s standing directly opposite you as if placed there by some immortal hand. Someone you know already.

Someone like Harry Hook.

A belated understanding is beginning to nestle itself between your ribs like a knife in the heart. No, this can’t be. You refuse to believe it. Still, when Harry is the first one to make a move, and walks briskly down the gangplank to stand in front of you, and says in an increasingly cavalier tone, “So, you’ve got your story started too, haven’t you?”

“Harry,” you say weakly. “I didn’t realize that you’d also gotten a song.”

“More than a song,” he says grimly. “I’ve got the whole story.”

You stare at him. “You know how it’s going to end?”

Harry had been doing his best to keep his gaze firmly pinioned on a nearby wall, but his eyes flicker briefly, traitorously, over to you when you pose the question. They snap back immediately, though. For a pirate, he’s never been the best liar, although he tends to make up for it with excellent swordsmanship. “No one knows how their story is going to end until they follow it through.”

You narrow your eyes crossly at him. “But you have a guess, don’t you? Spit it out, Hook. I don’t have all day.”

“Actually,” Harry contradicts, seeming to take great joy in the opportunity to be bothersome, “you do have all day. You’re a part of a story now, love. Your whole life is going to be wherever the wind takes you.”

You roll your eyes. “Thanks, Harry. Very helpful. Don’t try to dodge the question, though. You know how this is going to end, right?”

He sighs. “I have an inkling. Very vague. Probably untrustworthy.”

“All pirates are untrustworthy,” you remind him.

He grins broadly, sharklike. “And all children of villains are saints like you, of course.” He groans at your exasperated expression. “Fine, fine. Although I’d suggest you get better at pretending you like playing my little games if you’d like to keep this up.”

Your eyes widen. “What do you mean?”

“You’ve guessed it already, haven’t you?” Harry says testily. “Think about the songs, Y/N. The melody. That wasn’t a villainous monologue, not even your basic pledge for debauchery and ruin. That was a love song.”

You shake your head frantically. “No, Harry. That was so not right. What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well,” Harry says slowly, “I ‘spose it means we’re meant to fall in love.”

You draw back so quickly that you think you’ve insulted him. “No. Absolutely not. No offense, Harry, but I don’t want to fall in love with you.”

“I’ll try not to let it go to my head,” he says dryly.

You wave a hand dismissively. “It’s not about you, I swear. It’s just– this was supposed to be my story, you know? My whole life. I was supposed to have a glorious adventure, or engage in fantastic battles, but I get one chance at a story and it’s about falling in love? No way. I won’t accept this.”

“You’re acting like I enjoy this too,” Harry retorts. “Quite the contrary, sweetheart. You’re not the only one who’s been dreaming about their story for ages. How do you reckon I’m meant to tell my father that I got a love story? He’d laugh at me so hard he’d probably stop getting scared of that crocodile once and for all. I’m just as unhappy with this as you are, but I’m willing to do something about it.”

You eye him cautiously. “Like what?”

“Let’s play along,” he suggests, and when you look like you’re going to snap at him, he raises his hands defensively and adds hastily, “I know, I know, but hear me out, will you? The faster we get things going, the sooner this ends. You know as well as I do that characters from other stories can take part in other ones, too. ‘Sides, maybe this one isn’t just a love story. Maybe we do travel somewhere exciting, we just don’t know it yet. You don’t have to fall in love with me, alright? We can pretend. We’ll sing our songs, then do whatever we want with our hearts. Me, I’m planning to show my strength by carving mine out of my chest and wearing it as a necklace. It would make a pretty pendant, I wager. Plus, all the crew would be awestruck over it.”

You can’t help but laugh at his words. “Harry, if you cut your heart out, you’d die. If you want a necklace like that, use one of your enemies’ organs.”

He nods appreciatively. “That might work better, I think.” Then, eyeing you apprehensively, “So, does that mean you’re willing to do it? To play along with our story?”

You sigh. “I think it does. It’s not like we have any choice, do we?”

Harry pulls a face. “A girl is cosmically destined to fall in love with me, and in the heat of the moment of her confession, she says it’s because she doesn’t have any choice. Be still, my heart.”

This makes you smile. “You know it’s not personal, Harry. We’ve been friends for ages, I should hope you know when I’m teasing.”

“And I should hope the same,” he says with mock solemnity, although his faux stony demeanor cracks with a wide grin within moments.

You hold out your hand for him to shake. “To falling in love?”

“To falling in love,” he says, and shakes it. So the story begins.

You’re not going to say that it’s difficult, pretending to be in love with Harry Hook. You’ve never had an issue with his company; he’s one of your oldest friends, all of the villain kids on or around the Isle of the Lost have come in contact with each other before, and you and Harry just so happened to cross paths more than a few times. In fact, you’d go so far as to say that if you were forced to sing love songs with any of the villainous children on this island, Harry would be your preferred choice.

And– the problem with that, see, is that it makes this whole thing sound like something it isn’t. You’re not in love with Harry, even if your story seems designed to make you think otherwise. You know how you felt about him before the story began, and a couple of ditties about finding something special in a person you previously overlooked isn’t going to change anything. Harry is your friend. Nothing more than a potential ally.

But then the story takes you two away from the island for a spell, the two of you co-captaining a small sailing vessel by yourselves in search of a magical talisman that would have the power to make every one of your days enchanting. You had assumed it would be a talisman of some sort, that is; yet when the two of you arrived at the hiding place of this supposed treasure and split up to each pursue one length of a split crossroads, your paths looped around so you came face to face with each other again. 

No artifacts, no charms. Just Harry almost stumbling into you, having to wrap one arm around your waist so you don’t fall, his chest rising and falling rapidly as if he’d been running in an attempt to beat your time. You’d chastise him for it were it not for the fact that you were sprinting, too. You wait for Harry to let you go, but he doesn’t, and instead leans closer, so close you can feel his breath hot on your cheek, and then–

You pull away quickly. Harry looks at you like a wounded dog, which makes you feel sick to your stomach. “No,” you say through gritted teeth. “This isn’t– this isn’t us. It’s the story.”

“Is it really just the story?” Harry asks you.

“Yes,” you say, refusing to consider any other option for a second. “You didn’t love me before it started. The magic is messing with our minds. This isn’t real, Harry.”

He starts slowly walking towards you, and afraid you’ll make a mistake you’ll regret once the story ends, you back up in turn, up until the point when your back hits a wall and you can go no further. Harry, however, has nothing in his way but you, and there is nothing to stop him from closing the gap between you once again.

“Tell me it’s not real,” he says lowly.

“It’s not real,” you repeat.

His hand rises to your chin, tilting it up so you have to look in his eyes. He drinks in the sight of you like he’s been marooned alone for days, like salt water has been his only benediction for as long as he can remember. “Tell me,” he says again.

“It’s not,” you insist, but your conviction is gone, drifted away from you on uncertain tides. “It’s the magic. Not us.”

“Not us?” He asks, and kisses you. Slowly, terribly slowly, he kisses you, and in between silently begging him to move faster, do more, you think about all the times you’ve been under a spell in the past, and how this feels nothing like that. Not at all. Whenever you’re under an enchantment, some small part of you knows it’s wrong, giving you just enough hope that you might be able to fight free.

When you kiss Harry, though, you don’t want him to stop. Not at all. Every single particle in your body is beating along to the same erratic pulse through your veins, the one that leans into his touch, reaching for the front of his salt-stained shirt to pull him ever closer to you. If this is your story, you don’t ever want it to end. If there is a writer out there somewhere, feverishly scribbling out your chapters, you hope they never cease, that every one of their movements until the day they die and then past that will bring you more moments with Harry, moments just like this one in which you never have to let him go.

“It’s not just the story,” you tell him amidst ragged breaths when he finally breaks away.

“No?” Harry asks, one brow quirked. Usually, he’d never pass up the chance to gloat, but he looks sorely disheveled, and he can’t take his eyes off of your kissed lips long enough to give him the chance to revel in his victory like he normally would.

Just in case, though, you distract him from the triumph by kissing him again. Somewhere in the surrounding uncharted territory, the waves crash against the shore, the seabirds wheel and sing on the marine breezes, and you find the magic in the one boy who has always been there for you, and always will be, even after your story ends. That is the magic of love, you suppose. Adventures come to a close. Battles are won, heists are accomplished, but what you and Harry share will go on forever. A fitting legacy for the best two villains who ever lived.

[mimicmockingbirds]

OK, but hear me out

Say Ride the Cyclone were to be adapted into a film; imagine how much fun it would be to see it animated.

Because for the main plot, like the intro song and the mostly dialogue scenes in limbo, you could easily do a stylistic, but still grounded in realism style that a lot of modern animated projects are doing right now (think Arcane or Into the Spider Verse). But once each of the kids go into their respective songs/fantasies for what their life could have been? What if those were done in completely different styles?? Imagine the additional, visual storytelling that would tell about who they are as characters?

Like say, for Ocean's number, WTWN, everything became more simplified, and the characters (especially Ocean herself) turned into a more rounded, chibi-like style to enhance just how cutesy and likeable she's trying to portray herself throughout that number.

Or for Noel's Lament, everything goes black and white, and the characters become even more 2D stylized, and the film scales down to a smaller millimeter frame, more reminiscent of cartoons from the early 20's, when animation was just starting out, to enhance his idealization of "the olden days" (as Ocean puts it).

Mischa's song, This Song is Awesome could be animated with a more choppy frame rate, and the character designs turn a little more jagged around the edges, kind of like animated music videos (I'm thinking a Gorillaz band vibe). But as he transitions into singing about Talia, the colors start to bleed out over their lineart, and become more paint-like and Talia herself moves like a rotoscoped character (think Loving, Vincent that came out a few years ago) to enhance the sense that she's somewhere between a real person and a fantasy Mischa's built in his mind.

Ricky's song would, of course, be stylized after those sci-fi cartoons from the 90's, like X-Men or Captain Planet.

For the Ballad of Jane Doe, I would love to see something like what Wolfwalkers did back in 2020, where most of the characters (in this case, the other kids) are for the most part, animated like traditional, 2D characters with very clean lines and neat movements, whereas Jane herself stands out for having messier, sketchy line art, and looks more and more unfinished in her animation as the song goes on, because she can feel more and more of her own identity being lost.

Constance's Sugar Cloud I could see done in the classic 2D Disney style (i.e., the Renaissance era of Disney, like the Lion King or Little Mermaid days) because not only is it really smooth and colorful and just all around nice to look at, but it reminds the average moviegoer of their childhood growing up with those movies (among others, obviously), which ties in nicely with Constance's preceding monologue about remembering her own life, and the good that came with the bad.

I'm even tempted to envision the first half of the finale song in a different style, when the stage production would show a quick projection of Jane/Penny's life after she returned to the world of the living. Imagine watching this animated film, and for that segment alone, it becomes that really hyper-realistic, almost uncanny valley CGI animation style, to show that she really has joined the world of the living, i.e. our world, among us, the living breathing movie goers watching this, and watching the other kids still in limbo fade back to that main art style for the final number.

I don't know; it just feels like something that would be so engaging to see from an already compelling storyline and characters. Especially with more experimental animation projects on the rise right now

[physalian]

A Guide to Productive Filler

I was going to write this post about the wonders of fanfic and how it does not do the “forced miscommunication for cheap drama” trope, and it did not stay that post for long.

I’m sure it’s out there, but it’s not saturated in the most popular fics and I think I know why: Fanfic exists in contrast to the established canon, and the canon has forced miscommunication, thus fanfic looks at the perpetual failure of those plotlines and ignores it.

Nobody likes this trope, yet it keeps happening. In TV, at least in the old days when we had full seasons with appropriate and satisfying filler episodes and actual good stories and such (you know, before Disney +) TV shows were contracted to fill a minimum number of episodes and didn’t always have enough content to fill it, especially CW shows.

Enter filler episodes, which, when productive, still entertained the audience with off-beat side quests or gave more screen time to beloved side characters or explored more of the world and the lore. Filler plots meant that you could casually check in on your favorite show once a week, or miss an episode, and not feel completely lost because the plot wasn’t super tight and lean. Some of my favorite episodes of all my favorite TV shows are filler plots and just because they’re “filler,” as in, not a plot-heavy element to advance the narrative, doesn’t mean they were lacking in story.

That was good writing.

Bad filler elements were sh*t like forced miscommunication for cheap drama and it still exists even in the “mini series” that are really just long movies extended to keep people from canceling their subscriptions. TV shows may have one or two head writers, but they’re still written by committee and producers and production companies trying to milk as much from a profitable product as possible, which means they couldn’t write an efficient, epic romance that ended too quickly. They had to faff about for a few seasons before delivering to keep butts on couches tuning in to generate sweet, sweet ad revenue.

Forced miscommunication in TV shows have always made sense in that light. Yeah it’s a product of bad writing, but I can’t point at the head writer or even the staff writer alone and criticize their writing ability because it likely wasn’t their decision.

Forced miscommunication in books, however—that I have no excuse for. Books aren’t written by committee. In this case, I really can just blame the author for their bad choices, which, in turn, maybe came from their favorite TV shows and how they executed similar plot lines.

Fanfic does not do this, usually. It’s not written by committee and has no quota to fulfill to beef up the narrative with extra chapters.

—

So. You want your story to be longer, fanfic or otherwise, but you’re struggling because your plot is too thin and you don’t know where to go from here.

First, a disclaimer: Novellas exist and can be as short as they need to be.

“If I had more time, I would have written a shorter letter,” means that  just because it’s long doesn’t mean every word serves a purpose. With enough time, the writer can trim down their thoughts for conciseness and clarity, and say the same thing with better impact with less beating around the bush.

So just because it’s short doesn’t make it bad, just because it’s long doesn’t make it good. It’s about what you do with the words you’ve written.

However, if it really is a thin story lacking substance and oomph, here’s some suggestions that are not sh*t like “forced miscommunication”. These are not meant for generalized application and should be considered heavily before implementing, because any one of them can change your book for the worse by adding in unnecessary detail that distracts from the main story.

1. Consider multiple narrators

Now. I just read a rather bad book that could have lost about ⅔ of its story for a variety of reasons and told the same story in a fraction of the page count. One of those issues was giving the villain several POVs that ruined the suspense and the tension because the reader became privy to their grand plan long before the protagonist and instead of having all our questions dying to be answered with the protagonist, we were waiting around for them to stop fooling around and figure it out already.

With that said, if you have a character of second importance to the protagonist whose perspective would benefit and enrich the story, consider giving them POVs to explore either when the protagonist couldn’t be present, or in contrast to the main narrator’s thoughts on the story and conflict.

I’ve never written anything without multiple POVs and still get carried away sometimes just trying to fill in all the missing time that didn’t add enough to the story to make it worth it. I have deleted POVs from ENNS that were better left up to audience interpretation then all laid out on the table.

This technique very much necessitates restraint, but giving your foil character, your deuteragonist, even your villain some narration “screen time” might help you beef up your word count and tell more than just one biased side of the same story. Fanfic tends to be very efficient with this because, again, one writer working for free tends to want to be efficient and not give pages upon pages of useless prose.

2. Side-quests and character studies

My all time favorite filler episode of any TV show is LOST’s “The Constant”. It focuses entirely on the side character Desmond. He’s an unwilling time-traveler and throughout season 4, struggles to control his temporal displacement and risks dying if he can’t find a “constant” to anchor him to the correct timeline.

This episode is often praised as one of, if not the show’s finest hour. Desmond spends most of the runtime flipping erratically between the past and the present as his romantic relationship spirals for other plot reasons. He ends up making his “constant” his fraught relationship and is able to revert to the past with knowledge of the future to get his then-ex girlfriend’s new phone number so he can call her at an exact date in the future to prove he won’t have given up on them. When Des finally makes that call 8 years later, it’s so emotional, so full of catharsis, so exciting to see him finally reach her after struggling since we met him.

And it has absolutely nothing to do with the plot at large, only Desmond’s arc. It explores some of the world’s lore but doesn’t answer any of the main plot questions or progress any other major character, and Des is the only time traveler so all the risk surrounding time travel is only for him. Critically, it still adheres to the themes of the show and fulfills much of the promises of this character’s role in it.

The show’s worst episode, “Stranger in a Strange Land,” is also filler about protagonist Jack’s tattoos. He makes a relationship with a woman nobody cares about and spends the entirety of the episode’s flashbacks, which is most of the episode’s runtime, dicking around in Thailand. With this quasi-wise woman’s tattoo techniques. Nobody cares what they mean, they didn’t connect with the themes of the show, didn’t tell us anything substantial about Jack or the world, lore, or story, and just felt like a massive waste of time.

If you’re going to write side quests, be more like “The Constant” and less like “Stranger in a Strange Land”. 

3. “Slice of Life” moments

A repeat of referencing this scene and this movie but I don’t care: “Doc Racing” from Cars is just one example. Adding in scenes like these won’t give you tens of thousands of words, but maybe you only need a couple hundred to feel satisfied.

Slice of life moments slow the pacing down, so place them wisely, and just let your characters be people in their world. Small things, human things. In Cars, it’s an old man letting himself enjoy life again when he thinks nobody’s watching. I have a scene in my sci-fi WIP series where two brothers, plagued by their family’s social status, take a drive and pick up greasy drive-thru food to park on a mountain overlook and just watch the city while licking salt off their fingers. I think Across the Spiderverse is about 20 minutes too long, but that scene of Miles and Gwen upside down on the roof before the plot ramps up is another quiet, human moment.

It could be a character who needs a break from the breakneck speed of the plot and the stress to listen to music, walk away from the project and enjoy the sun, anything. Do try to not get overly pretentious trying to make it super metaphorical and poetic, let the audience do it for you. These quiet scenes could end up being the audience’s favorite.

—

If you’re trying to make your book longer, don’t be like Bilbo Baggins, okay? Don’t let your characters be spread thin, like butter scraped over too much bread. Add, don’t stretch. If the romance is on track to come together sooner, let it, or figure out a more meaningful way to delay it than throwing in a dumb argument that won’t mean anything in 20 pages anyway.

This wasn’t an exhaustive list, just what I think could be the most effective with the widest applications across genres.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

What would you change about Malleus if you could?

To quote myself from an older post:

“Honestly, I wouldn’t change anything about Malleus, even if I don’t like him as he is. A lot of my grievances with Malleus fundamentally make Twisted Wonderland what it is, so changing Malleus would also change Twisted Wonderland, from the marketing (aka make Malleus NOT a focal point) to the story itself. Like, the whole point of Malleus is to be standoffish and mysterious. If he wasn’t, then there wouldn’t be any good foreshadowing for chapter 7 […] I understand that he is the way he is in service of the main story plot and to stay true to his Disney origins […] he serves his purpose in the story. Don’t fix what isn’t broken.”

Instead of changing Malleus, I’d like to change how the world interacts with him without making major changes to his background or personality. That will be the focus of this post!

Here is what I would alter:

Introduce Malleus to Yuu sooner and make their interactions more meaningful than a few dialogue exchanges before he poofs away.

A lot of my issues with Malleus come from how weak his friendship with Yuu feels, especially if the player does not project onto their relationship to fill in the gaps. They don’t meet until book 2, Lilia delivers instead of Malleus in book 4, and Malleus and Yuu don’t interact at all in book 6. When they do meet, they don’t even do or say that much that would make them… I don’t know, connect? And no, the nickname (Tsunotaro/Hornton) alone doesn’t cut it for me. The value of Yuu and Malleus’s relationship as it currently stands is too dependent on whether the player likes Malleus or not, and anyone who doesn’t is left not caring about his and Yuu’s bond.

Let’s show Malleus sooner (even as early as the end of the prologue). Maybe Yuu sees his figure from a distance and is curious about him. Then have him appear and interact with Yuu every book. Have them actually get to know each other a little, but not in ways which would be too intimate or give away his identity. Tailor each interaction so that it tangentially relates to the problem Yuu is dealing with that particular book, then, through their interaction, have Malleus give advice in a roundabout way that ends up helping Yuu come up with a solution for that book. This way it progresses the story, maintains Malleus’s enigmatic presence, AND it deepens his bond with Yuu.

One good example of this actually occurs in book 3 of the main story. Yuu confides in Malleus in 3-24 that they’ve lost their dorm as collateral in a deal. Malleus then abruptly changes the topic to gargoyles. He points out that although they look scary, they serve an important function as a type of drainage spout to protect buildings from the elements. “They look frightful, and yet they are beings devoted to the preservation of the home. Sometimes, what you see with your eyes is the complete opposite of the truth.” Finally, Malleus advises Yuu to keep fighting for their dorm, as he too would hate to see Ramshackle be seized and turned into a noisy establishment. This is PERFECT, we need more of THIS sort of Malleus-Yuu interaction 😭 He’s still communicating in a quirky way and sharing his interests but he also manages to impart sage advice to Yuu, which they use to deduce the truth to Azul’s “indestructible” contracts. Give us more of this every book, please.

Properly reprimand him when he actually makes mistakes or endangers others.

I cannot tell you how insanely frustrating it is that Malleus gets let off easy for the transgressions (whether major or minor) he commits and the danger he puts his peers in. He should be held to the same standards as his peers and treated the same too. If some rando mob student or another dorm leader would get into trouble for starting a fight, then Malleus should also be held accountable when he abuses his magic (which he KNOWS he has an abundance of compared to his peers) to "prank" others. He should not get special treatment or get put on a pedestal just because of power or social status.

Give Malleus opportunities to demonstrate his abilities as a leader.

Diasomnia is known for having tons of Draconians (Malleus fan boys), right??? So show us what makes him worthy of being followed and revered beyond his lineage and the power he was born with. Don't tell me they just mindlessly worship him for his title and strength. What has he done to earn their respect and loyalty? What makes him fit to rule over them? Surely not just noble blood?

Instead of telling us about Malleus’s greatness, how about we actually get to see him show how great he is? No magic, no physical prowess. Put him in a tough situation where he cannot handwave the problem away and force him to use his brains to come up with a creative solution on his own. We kind of got a glimpse of this in Master Chef/Culinary Crucibles, since Malleus was not allowed to use magic for the course, and that was just small stakes. I would like to see more scenarios like this which force Malleus to confront issues and to think outside of the box. This would help us see how he fares on his own, how he thinks, and how he reacts when he cannot rely on magic as a crutch. Who is Malleus without his magic? That's what I want to know.

[papiliotao]

MOVIE NIGHT

♡ — Reader: GN

♡ — Characters: Heizou, Kazuha, Scaramouche, Xiao, Venti

♡ — Synopsis: immersing yourselves in the wonderful world of films.

♡ — Content: modern!au, fluff, crack, established relationship in Venti’s, mutual pining in Kazuha’s, friends to lovers in Kazuha's and Heizou’s, Scara being a little mean and grumpy, reader is roommates with Scaramouche, Xiao is oblivious, but he's got the spirit

♡ — A/N: welcome to another episode of Rei can’t write the same amount for each character. No, I’m definitely not biased lmao I’m so sorry, Venti enjoyers </3 I hope you enjoy the fic though! Likes and reblogs are appreciated 💕

Heizou

Shikanoin Heizou is a splendid friend, but he’s also the last person anyone wants to watch movies with. For one, he always chooses films of the same genre: mystery, and in addition to this, he’s too smart for his own good. You’re certain your friend must possess some sort of sixth sense because he never fails to predict the most ludicrous of twists. On one hand, you’re impressed by his superhuman abilities, but on the other hand, you can’t get through a single film without Heizou spoiling the ending for you.

This leads to you making a bet with Heizou. If he can watch one movie with you without giving away anything about the critical plot points, you will do one favour for him — anything he wants (within reason, of course). When you propose the idea, you’re surprised by how quickly Heizou agrees. It seems that he’s confident in his ability to keep his mouth shut.

The two of you choose to watch a detective movie. For the first half of the film, he’s able to hold himself together impressively well. He simply sits still and stares at the screen with interest lacing his gaze. Heizou doesn’t speak, doesn’t express surprise or grief when the first victim of the fictional murderer is found dead, and doesn’t chime in when the detective is investigating leads. However, one particular scene shatters his resolve.

The detective has caught the killer in the act, but their figure is hidden beneath a thick cloak. Their identity is obscured, and they do not speak a word. As the detective starts ranting about how they have connected the dots and figured out the identity of the murderer, Heizou starts shifting uncomfortably next to you. You look over to him and see that he is struggling to stay quiet. Finally, he gives in to temptation.

"What kind of detective are you? That’s — " before Heizou can speak another word, the figure pulls down their hood to reveal that the detective's conclusions are completely off the mark. Your jaw drops. Heizou regains his composure and breathes out a sigh of relief. Thanks to the film’s impeccable timing, he hasn’t lost yet. He manages to make it through the rest of the runtime without spoiling anything — not that there’s much left to spoil. Once the credits roll, Heizou brings up the favour you promised him.

"What do you want?" you ask, breathing out a sigh of defeat.

"A kiss," your mischievous friend smirks at you. His eyes glitter as he speaks. You stare at him, absolutely flabbergasted.

"Where is this coming from?" you inquire, narrowing your eyes at Heizou.

"For someone who’s been forced to watch so many detective movies, you sure are bad at deciphering clues. I love you — as more than a friend. I thought I was making it fairly obvious, but it seems you’re just as clueless as the characters that were onscreen mere minutes ago."

Kazuha

As your childhood friend, Kazuha has spent countless nights sleeping over at your house and watching cheesy films with you — emphasis on cheesy. Even though the two of you are now in college, your tradition of having movie nights every week has never ceased. However, your feelings toward the boy have changed dramatically.

There was a time back when you were in elementary school where Kazuha was nothing more than your best friend. The two of you would cuddle on his couch while viewing Disney movies. At the time, you thought nothing of the close proximity, too focused on the film to read too much into Kazuha’s actions. You didn’t notice the way he would stare at you instead of the screen. You didn’t notice the way he would gently pull you closer whenever you seemed scared. And you didn’t notice the way he would sigh wistfully whenever you watched romance movies that you found abhorrently cringey.

However, now that you’re an adult, you are able to catch on to Kazuha’s subtle affections, prompting you to consider the prospect of the boy having a crush on you. Your theory causes you to come to the startling conclusion that you reciprocate his sentiments. In an official capacity, you’re still best friends, but deep down, you know that there’s more to it. He likes you, but you’re too scared to confront him about his feelings, too afraid of taking one wrong step and decimating your precious friendship.

It doesn't help that Kazuha is only becoming more and more bold with his advances. Case in point: today’s weekly film viewing. As always, Kazuha has his arm wrapped around you, cuddling with you for comfort. He’s so close that you can feel his breath tickling the side of your face, so you try your best to direct all your attention toward the movie to prevent your visage from turning a vibrant cherry red.

Kazuha has chosen to watch something romantic this week. In hindsight, letting him pick the film was a mistake. As a result of your poor decisions, you are now seated on a couch in a television-lit room beside your best friend-turned-crush. Sappy dialogue plays in the background as Kazuha gently plays with your hair. You risk a glance at the boy, and you are rendered breathless.

His white hair catches the weak light of the screen in a way that makes it seem as though it is made from strands of moonlight. The gentle smile on his face makes your heart flutter. Most beautiful of all, however, are his vibrant red eyes. Piercing crimson meets your gaze as Kazuha notices you staring at him.

"The pickup lines in this movie are a little generic, don’t you think?" Kazuha asks you. You breathe out a sigh of relief when he doesn’t bring up the fact that you were very obviously admiring his appearance just a few seconds ago.

"I guess you’re right," you reply. "Does my favourite poetry nerd think he can do better?" you tease your friend.

Kazuha seems lost in thought for a second before responding. "I like to think that I would be more genuine with the one I love. Instead of repeating the words of lovers before me, I would like to offer the person dearest to my heart words of affirmations specific to them." His answer makes you melt on the spot. Kazuha is such a sweet and thoughtful person.

"Is there anyone you’re thinking about in particular?" you innocently inquire.

Kazuha chuckles lightly. The sound of his laughter is swoon-worthy. "There is. I could write pages upon pages of poetry about them — in fact, I already have. Perhaps we’ll be able to read them together someday."

"And who is the lucky person you’re crushing on?" you ask Kazuha. You try to make your tone light so that your question don’t make him feel as though you’re interrogating him. However, you’re almost certain that desperation oozes from the subtle cracks in your soft voice. An awkward silence hangs in the stagnant air.

"It’s you," Kazuha whispers. "It’s always been you." You feel your heart soaring out of your chest. Despite the fact that you have been somewhat aware of Kazuha’s affections for an eternity, hearing him confess his feelings still causes the blood to rush to your face. Your lips can’t help but curve into a tender smile.

Kazuha makes eye contact with you, desperately searching your gaze for any semblance of reciprocation. He seems to find what he’s looking for because a split second later, the boy relaxes completely.

As the film in the background ends, you and Kazuha come to a mutual understanding. His heart belongs to you and yours to him. The first act of your love story with Kazuha has concluded, but you are sure there is still much more to come.

Scaramouche

Scaramouche is nothing short of an interesting roommate. You’re not quite sure why, but he often goes out of his way to avoid you. To your dismay, it almost feels as though you are living alone. You’ve always wanted to get closer to the boy, but he refuses to speak to you unless necessary, and he hardly ever leaves his room. When he does decide to talk to you, his responses are either blunt or straight up snarky. He pokes fun at you in attempts to provoke you. Although you find his attitude infuriating, you also long to understand him. Scaramouche has piqued your curiosity in every way possible.

It just so happens that you find the perfect opportunity to spend time with him on a rainy summer day. Initially, you are intent on heading to the local park to meet your friend for a picnic dinner. However, after taking only a few steps outside your apartment complex, a few light drops of rain hit your head. Despite this, you continue forward, hoping that Mother Nature will take pity on you and calm the cries of the storms at hand. Your wishes are not fulfilled, as after only a few minutes, you are forced to head back as gentle rain becomes a raging thunderstorm.

When you re-enter your apartment, you notice that the place is almost completely dark. The only light inside the small space is a faint glow being emitted from the living room. Cautiously, you walk into the room. As you approach, you notice the faint sound of people conversing coming from the room. Strange. Does Scaramouche have guests over?

Your questions are answered when you step into the living room. Hushed whispers ring out over menacing music, evoking an ominous feeling within the depths of your soul. However, as you look over at the couch, you feel all the tension in your body dissipate into nothingness. Scaramouche is sitting down on the black cushions, remote in hand, and he appears to be watching something on the TV.

As you make your way toward your roommate, the floorboards creak and groan, causing him to whip his head around. His eyes widen as they land on you.

"What are you doing here?" Scaramouche asks you, furrowing his brows as he speaks. He regards you with an unreadable expression.

"I live here," you tell him. You know that he didn’t mean the question in that way, but you want to get a reaction out of him.

Scaramouche heaves out a heavy sigh. "Whatever," he mutters dismissively. He turns back to the screen.

"What are you doing?" you question Scaramouche, slowly walking over to the couch. You stand beside the piece of furniture, hesitant to sit down. Scaramouche doesn’t respond for a while. Perhaps he is hoping for you to leave. However, you continue to stay by his side, so he finally gives in and speaks.

"I’m watching a horror movie," he informs you in a dry tone. "Why? Do you want to watch with me? Somehow I doubt you would be able to handle it." Even in the dimly-lit room, you can see the wide cheshire-esque smirk spreading across Scaramouche’s face.

You roll your eyes. "I’ll be fine!" you insist, sinking down into the couch. The cautious thoughts that had been plaguing your mind just moments prior have now vanished. All that remains is a burning desire to prove Scaramouche wrong.

Despite your determination, you have to admit that your roommate is right. The film is frightening. However, as you look over at Scaramouche, you notice that he appears rather indifferent. It seems that he really isn’t scared. On the other hand, you feel yourself getting somewhat jumpy. The movie keeps catching you off-guard.

Chills run down your spine as ghosts emerge to confront the protagonist at every twist and turn they take. The backstories, motifs, and physical appearances of the entities cause you to shiver, and the gruesome nature of the characters’ demises has you shaking.

Subconsciously, you edge closer and closer to Scaramouche throughout the runtime of the movie. Around three fourths of the way through, you’re shoulder-to-shoulder. You don’t notice anything, but Scaramouche does. He doesn’t comment on it.

"How are you feeling?" Scaramouche suddenly asks out of nowhere, causing you to jump. He hits the pause button on the remote he’s clutching and waits to hear your response. The room is now completely silent. Scaramouche’s gentle breathing is audible in the stillness, and a sense of calm washes over you as you listen. You gradually regain your composure.

"I’m fine," you say. Although you try to make your voice seem confident, it comes out shaky. By the light of the television screen, you can see Scaramouche’s brows raise in a skeptical manner, and he turns off the TV.

"I don’t believe you." Scaramouche declares, his voice steady in stark contrast to yours. You pout, but you don’t try to argue with him. He’s right. The film has scared the wits out of you. "Listen, it’s obvious that you don’t want to watch more. Why don’t you just go to sleep or something?" he waves his hand dismissively.

You yawn upon hearing his words. Although it is still early, something about freaking out over a movie for a solid hour is immensely tiring. Perhaps sleeping is a good idea, but you are also afraid that the images of the ghastly figures within the film will follow you and materialize within the realm of nightmares. The mere thought makes you tremble. Gathering up all your courage, you ask Scaramouche a nearly outlandish question.

"Stay with me?" you stutter, shyly looking into his eyes. In a normal instance, you would not even consider requesting such a thing, but desperation often drives people to do crazy things.

Initially, the only response to your plea is an empty silence. You look down, wishing you could take back your words. If Scaramouche rejects you now, you will never be able to look him in the eyes again, but to your surprise, your roommate sighs and nods his head when you finally find the strength to meet his gaze.

Instead of leading Scaramouche to your room, you simply adjust your position on the couch and lay your head down on his lap. Your roommate opens his mouth to protest, but he sees the relaxed expression on your face and relents. Finally content knowing that you’re with someone who will protect you, you close your eyes and drift off into a peaceful slumber. Instead of nightmares, your dreams are filled with sweet rose-tinted skies, shimmering beaches of bejeweled sands, and oceans of the deepest azure.

As you are sleeping, half-coherent thoughts form in your unconscious mind. You begin to realize that perhaps Scaramouche isn’t as bad as he appears on the outside. With him, you feel a sense of serenity like no other, despite the fact that you are not all that familiar with each other. For now, you are content with the fact that you and your roommate have taken the first step in a long process of opening up to each other.

Xiao

Xiao doesn’t watch movies often. He doesn’t have a preferred genre, doesn’t have a favourite actor, and hasn’t watched more than five classics. In other words, the man lives under a rock.

When you learn of this, you immediately take it upon yourself to introduce Xiao to a wide array of cinematic masterpieces — and some laughably terrible movies just for the fun of it. Even though the two of you only know each other through mutual friends, you feel too much pity for Xiao to not help him explore the world of films. He's been missing out on absolute gems for years.

Besides, Xiao's reactions are always priceless — his reactions and, well, his lack of reactions. As an example, whenever the two of you watch horror movies together, Xiao stares at the screen with a straight face. He even goes so far as to criticize the logic of certain scenes.

"This doesn't make any sense. How did the protagonist trip over nothing?"

The absurdity of cinema logic never fails to puzzle Xiao. His comments, although slightly too serious at times, are always amusing, and they never fail to elicit a light chuckle from you. Unbeknownst to you, Xiao’s heart feels as though it’s about to leap out of his chest whenever he hears your laughter. He doesn’t quite know when or how his feelings toward you began to fester like a storm within his feeble heart.

In any case, Xiao is undeniably starting to fall in love with you, but he never says anything because he fears rejection. His crush on you is why he never says no to your invitations to enjoy films together. Over time, your monthly movie nights turn into weekly hangouts — rather uncharacteristic for the typically anti-social Xiao, leaving you wondering why he treats you differently.

This leads into your current situation. The two of you are sitting down in your living room, watching a teen romance movie. Subtle uncertainty lingers within the air, but you don’t really feel uncomfortable. You never feel uncomfortable with Xiao. Despite his cold exterior, he’s actually an absolute sweetheart, and it shows in the way he’s reluctantly cuddling you to keep you warm right now — albeit a little shyly.

The movie the two of you are watching is rather cringey and overly dramatic. It’s almost painful to watch the protagonist pine over their love interest, refusing to confess because they’re afraid of being turned down. They talk about how incredible their crush is, the comfort that they bring, and how they would love to have them by their side forever. Despite all this, the protagonist is still afraid to declare their affections, retaining a mindset plagued by the woes of doubt and insecurity.

You begin to realize that the main character is rather relatable, but you can’t quite put your finger on why — until you glance over at the amber-eyed boy sitting next to you. The realization that the film just perfectly described your feelings toward Xiao hits you like a truck.

You love Xiao.

You’ve loved him for a very long time.

But you were just too oblivious to tell.

You are so tangled up in a web of your own emotions that you don’t notice the way Xiao stares at you. He longs for you just as much as you long for him, but the two of you are both far to oblivious and fearful to confess your feelings right now. So for the time being, all you can do is steal quick glances at each other and shyly link your pinkies together, hoping that the seeds of affection within your hearts will give you the courage to turn your friendship into a blossoming romance.

Venti

Whenever it’s Venti’s turn to pick the film you’ll be watching for movie night, you just know that he’ll choose one of two things: a Disney movie or a musical. It’s no secret that Venti loves music, so he sings his heart out to all the musical numbers. He has memorized every lyric to every song flawlessly. The duality of your boyfriend’s voice makes you think that he himself could be a movie star. Sometimes it is light and airy to portray the carefree and joyful atmosphere of a scene, reminiscent of a light breeze on a sweltering summer day. However, Venti is also able to make his tone dark and wild — like the unpredictable gale of a fearsome storm.

Despite the fact that the beguiling melodies that leave Venti’s lips are no less impressive than the songs of sirens, sometimes he becomes a little too obnoxious for your liking. There are times where he can’t stop singing, even after the characters have stopped. Although his voice is delightful, it gets irritating because you can’t hear what’s going on in the film. In these instances, the best course of action is to take matters into your own hands.

You can usually get him to shut up by playfully nudging him with your elbow. Squishing his cheeks so that he can’t sing properly also works, and as a bonus, he looks adorable. However, this time, you decide to try something new.

You turn to your boyfriend and stare at him until you catch his attention. Once he is looking back into your eyes, you lean closer to him and wait until he gives you a sign that he’s alright with what you’re about to do. Venti seems to understand and nods, lips parting slightly. He never rejects your advances. Then, you close the distance between the two of you at an excruciating pace, savoring the frustrated expression on your boyfriend’s face. By this time, he has forgotten all about the movie. He is focused on you and you alone.

At long last, you plant a passionate kiss on his lips, fulfilling all his desires. Something about the way he tastes reminds you of freshly-baked apple pie — warm and sweet. You kiss him until he is breathless and red in the face, and when the two of you finally pull apart, your boyfriend is at a loss for words.

He stays silent for the rest of the film.

[xxx-silhouette-xxx]

Am I the only one disappointed with season 3 of The Mandalorian?

Contains SPOILERS - so skip if you don’t wanna know

Tonight was, painful.

I’ve REALLY been trying to hang on with an open mind but after tonight, there’s no going back.

And I’ve got some things to get off my chest.

Din Djarin has had NO character development from the sacrifice he made for Grogu’s life. This has been inarguably, the biggest disappointment for me. I was hoping for a season of exploration of a man’s moral compass and worldview being hauled upside down, a young boy who’d been orphaned, traumatised and taken in by a cult that raised him with titanium religious beliefs. Who grew into a hardened bounty hunter but gave up everything he knew for the sake of a lost child. Became shunned for protecting said child and despite doing what he felt was right, strived to seek redemption and forgiveness. There was so much potential for Din as a character in terms of growth and development, all of which was swept under a rug within the first two episodes. He has instead become apart of Disney’s formula of “the boss ladies side bitch” with nothing to add to the scene but his catchphrase “this is the way”. That and the sudden revival of his hate for droids even though he had been working on that issue in past seasons.

Grogu is more or less the commodity Disney grew cash dollar signs in their eyes over for the sake of product marketing and just have him doing cutesy shit for the sake of being cutesy.

And then there’s Bo Katan.

Now disclaimer - I’m not the type that hates an actual person for a character they play. Yes, I’ve never liked Bo Katan (that much I’ve made clear in recent posts) but I also think that Katee Sackhoff does a brilliant job playing a character as such. And to see her come to life in season 2 was incredible and to me, Bo Katan from season two is the REAL Bo Katan.

Because I’m sure as hell disappointed with what they’ve done to her character in season 3. Bo Katan was a terrorist who broke away from Mandalore unable to accept a new direction in leadership from her own sister. She massacred and terrorised innocent people, she plotted towards the death of her sister, splintered off from her terrorist group after the throne of Mandalore was taken by Maul and continued to fight against his loyalists and later the empire itself.

And we all saw the look of death on her face when Gideon pointed out that the dark Sabre belonged to Din

This isn’t someone I was rooting for but this was someone who didn’t know when to give up and would go to any means possible to get what they wanted. This is the same woman who made an oath in the throne room of Mandalore, saying that an outsider would never rule the people. The odds were against her in many ways yet she still fought like hell…. Where is that woman? And who replaced her with Disney’s first emo teen princess whose suddenly forgotten her xenophobic upbringing?

And as for Lizzo and Jack Black’s appearances in episode six?

My partner said it best when he commented that they turn the whole show into a parody of itself.

Personally, I found Christopher Loyd’s character as flat as cardboard and an absolutely pointless goose chase used to build up momentum all to throw away the opportunity for a twist ending.

It really breaks my heart to see the series diminish into what it has. The whole reason people fell in love with the show was due to Din and Grogu’s father son dynamic and that’s all been thrown to the side in favour of other characters, setting up for the future of other shows and tying off the ends to the sequels.

Season three completely lacks the drive and purpose of the previous seasons.

It should and could have been so much more than what it is.

And Din Djarin deserved more depth in his story then to be abandoned to the side lines.

[sometipsygnostalgic]

Bit of thought and discussion last night over what makes a competent, effective movie vs a deep or interesting movie with Star Wars as our target.

So to highlight it in the most obvious way: George Lucas's movies are complex with deep plots, but are not well-written and fun to watch. So the prequels gained this reputation for being a bit of a slog because no matter how much Lucas loved this story he crafted, the way it was presented was lacklustre.

Meanwhile Disney tries to make a "competent" and entertaining movie with every attempt. Every marvel movie... before Endgame... was very entertaining and well-directed, regardless of if there was anything worth thinking about later.

When it came to Star Wars, Disney really struggled with this.

The Force Awakens is definitely a competent movie that hits all the beats they wanted it to. It has those good Classic Star Wars feelings, weighty lightsaber combat, a core cast that you love watching interact, and an emotional centre. It does the job it's supposed to, perfectly, whereas not taking a SINGLE risk with the franchise. It desperately doesn't want to be associated with Lucas's "boring power bloaty" prequels.

Of course the film recieves criticism for this, because it's just copying A New Hope without adding any new dna to the franchise. Every critic can see what Disney was doing, making a nostalgic star wars theme park, and they say they want Disney to deliver in the next movie.

Then comes The Last Jedi, where Disney's lack of direction became incredibly obvious. Rian Johnson took the Force Awakens critique FAR TOO MUCH to heart and made The Last Jedi the complete opposite - Everything TFA did, TLJ did in the opposite way. So instead of being a hero in waiting, Luke Skywalker is disappointing to Rey, he's ran away and fallen into squalor and he immediately throws away the lightsaber that brought him to tears at the end of the first film. And instead of leaning on the new trio everyone was excited about, Johnson splits them up permanently, with no interaction at all in the movie.

The Last Jedi tries to make itself more interesting by forcing threads into places that do not fit. Luke Skywalker in the original trilogy isn't a messy dark character, he's a starry eyed optimist, but this movie takes the easiest and cheapest route possible to turn him into something he's not because the author wants a darker more questionable story and has only got this one film to make it that way. The movie also leans hard into everything Disney was trying to avoid with the first one, long boring segments of whacky hijinks.

As a result a lot of writers have respect for Johnson's attempts to diverge from Disney tradition of super safe movies, his attempts to add stuff to Star Wars and make a unique film, but it completely fails as a competent movie and it fails as a competent story because there are too many authors clearly fighting with each other.

Movie 3... I've not seen it. I do know a lot about it, and Abrams spends the whole thing once again undoing everything Johnson did and trying to return to a safe Star Wars. TOO safe. To the extent that the plot completely lacks any comprehension because it needs to warp the story so much to return to the beaten path.

Somehow, Palpatine returned!! What the fuck!!! And why was this revealed in Fortnite???

Why are they puppeting Carrie Fisher's corpse?

Rise of Skywalker is disney at its worst because they have gone from being super safe to trying to return something adventurous to the safe path, without any degree of originality or creativity. I don't think a single actual writer worked on that film. It was all just direction to make epic setpieces, the pursuit of a "competent and entertaining" film instead of the ninth part of a story.

They are also repeatedly having to do this with Marvel. They have the lost the ability to do their own stuff with Marvel and are following a variety of comic plots, because that's "safe", right? But no, the comic goes to all sorts of crazy places, which gets in the way of making a competent and cohesive film. So theyre trying to get rid of some of that complexity, enough to make the writing bad, but not enough for Marvel to become coherent because that would require actually creating new stories and not following the basic, highly profitable guidelines of Marvel comics.

[mumms-the-word]

In Fathoms Below

Teaser + Masterlist

Plot Summary: In ancient times, well before the Age of Humanity began, there existed a series of islands inhabited by powerful elves—the islands of Nautera. Rumored to have been the birthplace of multiple magical wonders and inventions the likes of which the world has never seen again, or is only just now reinventing, Nautera was legendary even during its own time. Until one fateful day, over 4500 years ago, the islands vanished, never to be seen again...

Now they’re no more than myth. No more than a bedtime story for young children. Not a single, legitimate record of Nautera exists, save for one. The Nauterran Account. Long thought lost, it has recently been retrieved from the depths of Candlekeep’s archives and placed into the capable hands of one Gale Dekarios. With the Nauterran Account in hand and an eclectic team of Baldurians and other allies mounting an official expedition, Gale journeys to find the ruins of Nautera…but hopes to find so much more.

ao3 link to the full fic

~*~*~*~*~*~

Pairings: Gale x fem!Tav (technically she's an OC not a Tav but eh)

Genre: Adventure, Angst, and Romance (everything you can normally expect from my long fics lol)

A/N: This fic is heavily, HEAVILY inspired by the Disney movie Atlantis, so be prepared for a familiar plot and several callbacks! For all intents and purposes, this fic takes place in an alternative version of the Faerûn setting, set in the 1490s. In this world, the Absolute Plot didn't happen, but our various characters have found a different adventure to bring them all together. Some things stay the same and some things change. Some stuff is completely made up by me to fit the idea, so if you’re looking for lore-accurate content, you’re probably not going to find much of it here. Just have fun with it!

Chapters:

Ch. 1 - The Adventure Begins

Ch 2. - The Launch

Ch. 3 - Expert in Gibberish

Ch. 4 - The Stowaway

Ch. 5 - Dragon Turtle

Ch. 6 - In Memoriam

Ch. 7 - Getting Underway

Ch. 8 - Cloakers

Ch. 9 - The Journey

Ch. 10 - Mythallars

Take me back to the Faerûnian Masterlist!

[thetimelordbatgirl]

What’s the point of the Isle if Red was born in Wonderland and not on the Isle? What’s even the point of Auradon Prep if there’s Merlin Academy with some of the villains and heroes going to school together? What’s the point???

"What's the point???"-A perfect summary of Disney Descendants nowadays. Seriously, the fact that they changed Red to having been born and raised in Wonderland when prior Descendants stuff alluded to the Queen of Hearts having been on the Isle...like what is the point of doing that??? Queen of Hearts could still be wanting to get revenge on Auradon even with Isle backstory, hell that might add to her reasons for revenge, since I'm pretty sure taking Wonderland People out of...well, Wonderland, would drive them insane as its the one place they thrive in and now they've been removed from it and are stuck in a prison and well...I can only imagine Queen of Hearts getting worser because of the Isle. (Seriously, even Ever After High addressed how wonderland people feel when unable to return to Wonderland, aka they feel lost and such in a world that isn't made to understand them...granted they also had the better Queen of Hearts design and better name for her kid but). There is literally no point to removing Queen of Hearts from the Isle and having Red born and raised in Wonderland beyond messing stuff up in Descendants even more (seriously, the prequel book could have been Red and her mom getting control of Wonderland back...not whatever you call the actual plot of the prequel book). Also they actually expect you to believe Red WITH the wonderland backstory, is somehow 'whip smart' and Chloe Charming is the naïve one...when I'm pretty sure the wonderland girl would be the naïve one actually while Chloe Charming would be the smart one??? Especially if Red somehow thinks the Isle was appealing just because it had no rules...

And Merlin Academy...oh one of the many banes of my existence...just...can we call it what it is: Ever After High rip off that also breaks a shit ton of continuity in Descendants??? Because similar to Ever After High, its a school that future heroes and future villains attend...that also leads to the fact that Descendants can no longer be based on the animated films like they claimed to be, because how the fuck would I dunno, Cinderella work if she attended the same school as Prince Charming??? Especially as animated Cinderella was put to work by her step family as soon as her dad died so there'd be no time for school??? How does Aladdin even work now when in the animated film, Jasmine has never been allowed out of the palace because of her over-protective father and has to sneak out and literally met Aladdin for the first time in the animated film...when according to Rise of Red, she and Aladdin BOTH attended school together and also dated in school, which??? HOW DOES THE PLOT OF ALADDIN WORK NOW THEN- and just, why the fuck is HADES of all bitches in the school??? Doesn't he have an underworld to rule??? Or is Disney gonna ditch mythology accuracy completely now??? And I guess Beast in Descendants got cursed as an adult if he attended a school, so rip that 'cursed as a child' implication from animated Beauty And The Beast- and lord, imagine your classmate in the future imprisoning your dad and you having to switch places with your dad, if Belle is attending the school as well. Maleficent....as long as its Leah and Stefen attending Merlin Academy with her I won't scream as much....if its Aurora and Phillip though, screaming time- and just, again, like Belle and Beast, Fay is just, I guess, seeing her classmate deal with family abuse and doing nothing for her when she's the classmate's future fairy godmother.

And also just because they apart of Merlin Academy: Morgie, son of Morgana Le Fay...where the fuck she been? Disney literally did not include her in Sword of The Stone, so where she come from? Also shit name for her son, not as shit as Red, but you know, its up there. Zellie, daughter of Rapunzel...third Rapunzel kid in Descendants lets go...but also hoping she's a time traveller because uh...how else is Razpunel's daughter in Merlin Academy with the future heroes and villains??? Ulyana...another sister of Ursula because using Morgana (Little Mermaid 2) was hard I guess...also comes with a 'whats the point' but a big one this time: what was the point of bating us with Dara Renee playing Chloe, only to reveal Dara is playing Ulyana and someone (with lighter skin tone then Dara) else is playing Chloe? What was the point of doing that beyond being iffy? And Hook...nothing to say on him...I just don't have anything on him, he's the least of Rise of Red's problems, he's just connected to one, aka Merlin Academy and the time travel plot (I'm not starting on that one because that'll be along ass rant...).

So yeah, like said: What's the point- perfect summary of Disney Descendants nowadays.

[deadman-is-a-moron]

Okay I watched Doctor Who’s finale and while I loved the season and I love Ruby and The Doctor and how whimsical this season felt I also am very disappointed.

Half of this season felt very rushed—I’m sure this is because there’s only eight episodes. Instead of slowly building towards a big plot point Bad Wolf style it felt like we were given two crumbs for what the finale was supposed to be and then it turned out to be a god. Don’t get me wrong I loved the Toymaker and Maestro but after both of them back to back I was feeling a little pantheon fatigue—I signed up for a sci fi show but instead we’re being served magical beings that can do anything (they’re fun don’t get me wrong but Sutekh lost his powerful presence after we saw the doctor beat two other gods recently).

Ruby’s mother reveal also felt lackluster. I get finding the beauty in the mundane and ordinary but that does not explain the snow or how this woman was able to avoid a literal god. “She was powerful because we assigned importance to her” shut up thats such a cop-out and it instead sounds like you’ve written yourself into a corner. I just find it odd that this season has had such a hard on for call backs yet they decided not to do so with Ruby’s mother and instead made her just some dude. It’s lame and I think it did a disservice to an otherwise awesome character.

My last question is who at Disney is dickriding for a UNIT spin off. They’ve shown the UNIT headquarters set 20 times this season and have it complete with a cast of child laborers diverse and charismatic characters. Don’t get me wrong I would kill to see Kate Stewart more but the constant inclusion of UNIT this season made it feel like a back door pilot more than anything.

TL;DR— Season 14 had some absolute bangers but left much to be desired. Also someone at Disney wants to (understandably) bang Kate Stewart.

[elijahs-dumps]

What Happened to Gonzo's Queerness?

Gonzo is, undeniably, the Muppet that Disney has struggled to keep consistent and in character the most. But why is that? If we take a look at any recent Muppets projects, from Muppets Haunted Mansion, to The Muppets (2015), or even Muppets Most Wanted, Gonzo is simply a shell of his former self. An entertaining shell at that, but a shell nonetheless. Before we can get into the how and why though, I’ll explain a little bit of who Gonzo really was when featured in the Muppets of the past. 

A Brief History of Past Gonzo

Gonzo’s key traits have always been that he is zany, immature, unpredictable, and often takes things far too literally. While “Modern Muppets” keeps these core traits in the Gonzo of today, he still lacks his usual depth. Often people overlook the fact that any of the Muppets have depth at all, but they’re all given their own moments, especially film to film.

I think a perfect example of what I’m talking about is his song, “I’m Going to Go Back There Someday”, from the original Muppet movie. Within The Muppet Show no characters ever struggled that much with overarching plots or even real negative emotions that carried from episode to episode. But in film where an episodic format won’t work, you need these small subtle layers. Your characters all have to have more obvious wants and needs to move the story along, or else it’ll all fall flat. This song is just a testament to the Muppets seamless transition from television to film. The number humanizes and grounds a character that is often perceived as ignorant or carefree by giving him a single wish, a wish to return to the sky like he did previously in the movie. Gonzo wants to be free from the world and view it simply as a spectator, completely at peace. It’s a childish wish, but a real and relatable one. The layers of this song can go deeper when you take into account the fact that Gonzo is the only one of his species, and probably spent most of his life alone or without a true home before the Muppets. Combine this with the fact we’re at the lowest point in the movie where all hope seems lost in the middle of nowhere, and then have all the other Muppets in the scene do backing vocals, it becomes a really somber and special moment for the movie as a whole. It connects well with Gonzo, the other Muppets, the film’s story, and audiences around the world. 

Other moments that showcase this level of subtle emotional complexity can be found in The Muppets Take Manhattan during the song “It’s Time for Saying Goodbye”, or throughout the entire Muppets from Space movie where Gonzo discovers and comes to terms with his own identity and place within the world. 

Muppets Haunted Mansion tried to recreate some form of a plotline for Gonzo, but because there was such little set up the pay off felt out of place. The idea was to have Gonzo briefly struggle with the idea of being alone and losing the attention of his friends, but it didn’t even really connect to any past storylines with Gonzo or even past moments within the movie, and just felt forced. Especially since he never truly grew at all from this experience either. 

But depth wasn’t the only thing we lost from Gonzo in the “Modern Muppets”, we also lost so much of his queer-coding. In the past, Gonzo has always been shown as unidentifiable in both gender, gender expression, and sexuality. Some of my favorite pieces of evidence towards this include the Gene Kelly episode of The Muppet Show where Gonzo distracts Miss Piggy so he can be serenaded by Gene Kelly. Gene briefly acknowledges how strange this is, but Gonzo seems unconcerned and so the two sing a love song together and all is well. Gonzo often does this, flirting with both male and female guests on the original show, as well as cross dressing throughout all five seasons of the show. Gonzo also cross dresses on the original Muppet Babies show from the 1980s, and there is even a Muppet Babies picture book from 1986 titled “What’s a Gonzo?” in which Gonzo and the other Muppets try to figure out what Gonzo is, only for Gonzo to be confronted by other versions of himself and told that he doesn’t need to know what he is because he knows who he is. Then, of course, there is also the iconic washroom comic strip from the officially licensed “Jim Henson’s Muppets” comics from 1981-1986, which I will be inserting below! 

Flanderization

Flanderization is the process through which a complex fictional character’s essential traits are oversimplified to the point where they constitute their entire personality. The term’s name is a reference to Ned Flanders from The Simpsons. 

While the Muppets aren’t exactly “complex”, they do have a certain level of depth like I’ve previously explained. Watering them all down to their most well known traits is what causes most problems with the “Modern Muppets”. Obviously, all new versions of the Muppets have been put through unfortunate amounts of flanderization. However, even though all the Muppets have suffered through a similar treatment, I still feel like Gonzo takes the brunt of it. This is also because Gonzo is one of the only core Muppets who has become less of a main character than before. Meaning he doesn’t actually get a lot of screen time, especially when compared to the movies from before Disney bought the Muppets. 

Why is This Happening?

This answer as to why any of this is happening at all is actually quite simple; it’s not marketable! In order to rebrand the Muppets, Disney has had to take the safe approach when it comes to reminding people why they liked the Muppets to begin with. However, in trying to keep things simple as far as character work goes, we then lose that character integrity which is what makes these “Modern Muppets” feel so hollow. Obviously this did not work at all, because Disney had stripped these characters so thoroughly, they thought they could do whatever they wanted with them and no one would notice. Cough cough - The Muppets (2015) - cough cough. 

So yes, while Gonzo does keep some basic sense of his personality through taking things too literally, participating in crazy stunts, and just acting pretty random, it’s such a toned down version compared to the Gonzo so many grew up with. Especially when it comes to all his queer coding, Disney is often too afraid of backlash to even put things like that into their kids or family orientated media. This could potentially be a reason why they sort of shoved Gonzo out of the main cast in everything but promo. The only time they attempted this was around 2021 with the reboot of the Muppet Babies and an episode titled “Gonzorella”. The episode was actually quite charming, and follows young Gonzo as he decides how to tell his friends he wants to wear a princess dress to their costume party. It’s a nice concept, completely in character for Gonzo, and a good message for children about how you don’t have to look how people will expect you to look all the time. It also helps to break the stigma around “boys clothes” and “girls clothes”. Still, lots of parents were very angry about this episode and claimed it was Disney’s “new woke agenda” that was turning the Muppets into something they’re not. As if the Muppets haven’t always inherently been queer-coded and a part of queer culture! 

Conclusions

So, if the Muppets are being washed out to their most basic selves more and more with each new project, what does this mean for the future of the Muppets?

Honestly? Nothing good, in my opinion. The franchise has been going downhill for quite some time, but I don’t think I’ll ever come to dislike it. If you don’t like these “Modern Muppet” adaptations, then that’s more than fine. I just personally don’t see it improving anytime soon, especially since Disney so rarely puts out any Muppets content that doesn’t get canceled. If they do put anything new out, I’ll obviously be the first to watch and praise it, because I really do enjoy the Muppets a lot.

I think the saddest thing here, and the reason I made this little essay, is that Gonzo’s queer-coding will only be lost in translation the more that time goes on. At least, that’s how I see it. The backlash Disney got for that episode of the Muppet Babies is exactly the kind of thing the company is always trying to avoid, especially with the media they make for young kids on Disney Junior. I doubt they’ll ever try something like that again in Muppets media aimed for small kids. And in the family targeted content Gonzo has only become a less and less prominent character. 

That being said, this is all just my opinion based on what I have seen and studied.  I will always be holding out a small sense of hope though, and I will still continue to see Gonzo as a queer icon in my eyes regardless of what he does in future projects! 

UPDATE: If you made it to the end of this essay YAYY!! TYSM<33 In case anyone was wondering, my next piece is gonna be about Kaz Brekker from Six of Crows and morally grey characters in general. It will not be a critique of the character or his fan base though! I don’t always hate on everything lol. However I will probably be talking about online book communities, like Booktok, so prepare yourselves for that if you plan on sticking around :3

[allgirlsareprincesses]

I'm so curious as to what your thoughts are on acomaf/Rhys. Personally, the reason the second book infuriated me was bc SJM completely shifted Tamlin's good traits onto Rhys, while erasing the fucked up things the latter did (like breaking Feyre's arm 😅), and thus clumsily erasing chances for interesting complex grey-morality characterizations for both characters. Also Feyre forgot about Tamlin so fast it almost made the first book seem useless lol. idk, I just liked Tamlin and feel he was done dirty with the weird lib-feminist makeover acomaf got. I did continue reading the series though. I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable speaking about this, so feel free to ignore this ask. Have a lovely day 💖

Phew! So my issues with the series are NUMEROUS and some day I will go into all the reasons I quit ACOMAF 3/4 of the way through, but for now, let me sum up my problem by comparing it to another modern phenomenon: Frozen.

Like ACOTAR, I have many specific dislikes about the Frozen series, but my main problem with it is the way it cynically uses fairy tale motifs against the audience, but then still wants to claim it is a fairy tale. Frozen's setup gives the audience absolutely zero reason to doubt or distrust Hans (other than the arrival of Kristoff). In fact, Hans and Anna have one of the best insta-love songs from the Disney collection, and it galls me TO NO END that it's a trick, a lie. And then the rest of the movie repeatedly mocks the audience for believing in fairy tale love ("You can't marry a man you just met!"), as if to say everyone who has enjoyed Disney fairy tales up to this point is a sucker. Yet then it expects us to invest in the Anna-Kristoff romance after punishing us for the Anna-Hans one. And meanwhile, Kristoff is about as interesting as stale bread (sorry not sorry, it's true. I love you Jonathan Groff, it's not your fault sweetie.).

So anyway, back to ACOTAR. Book 1 is a straightforward Search For The Lost Husband. Taken on its own, it honestly rules as an example of this Cupid & Psyche tale type. It has the hunter-huntress motif, the jealous sisters, passage into the otherworld, hidden/cursed prince, supernatural helpers, three trials in the underworld, and even resurrection from death. It's literally perfect, other than Rhys marking her and just generally being creepy.

And then the next book PUNISHES the reader for enjoying that. HAHA you fool, you sucker, you got taken in by an abuser! Actually that whole book was a f*cking waste of time and a lie, and what Feyre really needs is this dude who's secretly perfect and who has all the aesthetics of a tormented prince but none of the actual psychological damage (like, say, Tamlin had). And who pursued Feyre not because of any natural affinity but because he knew she was his predetermined MATE (ew ew ew and I repeat EW). And who dictates every f*cking plot point and then magnanimously gives Feyre the OPTION of participating and we're all supposed to cheer because he says "It's your choice" before repeatedly using her and endangering her.

And to the extent that this is another Search For The Lost Husband, why would I want the same story told again, especially when the narrative wasted my time and mocked me for investing in the last romance? I just... really resent the author using those motifs without signaling sooner that she's going to deliberately undermine them (which can be done, in fairness, but it takes more skill than SJM has displayed).

So yeah, that's my issue. It really seems to come from this faux feminism that has a lot of antipathy toward traditional fairy tales, but doesn't know how to critique them without mocking the protagonist and audience alike.

[pastelpousay]

Okay so Ik I should do something Halloween themed but I’m unprepared and I literally wrote my ass off all of yesterday so I’ve lost the ability to give a damn

Anywho time to Rant about TENS

Also TW FOR TALKS OF SENSITIVE SUBJECTS ‼️

(BTW IF YOU LIKE THE SHOW IM NOT UPSET ITS FUNNY BUT THATS LITERALLY IT I’m just here to hate on it because hating on it is so incredibly fun like 🙈)

Okay so…do I like the show? Uhm ngl this show is really good to watch with a friend and just straight up dog on because of how bad it is 💀. Like the animation and art is ass sort, the plot is reused to the point the order of the eps don’t even matter bro. The plot doesn’t even matter tbh because kuzco always learns the same lesson and forgets it the next episode or something like damn bitch are you dumb or do have amnesia?? 💀 he’s actually such an asshole. the racism and sexism doesn’t suprise me and the supposed gr00ming…..ehhhhh….after the first episode…the way he talk to Malina made me uncomfortable 💀 ME THE VIEWER. Like it fest so wrong on so many levels like stop😭 I’m not even jealous I would have liked them had the first ep played out differently than it did💀😭😭. ALSO THATS NOT HOW KUZCO WOULD ACT IF HE HAD FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE LIKE DUDE. Like why is he freak. Ik it’s a spin off but like can you at least make it accurate 💀😭😭. This is after the events of the movie Ik his whole character isn’t gonna change but like also kuzco is ass at flirting and I don’t think he would act so confidently if he actually liked someone like how he’s supposed to like Malina 😭 I feel like he’d be more nervous because it’s not an emotion or feeling he’s felt before or much of. My kuzco would literally be stuttering, meanwhile TENS kuzco has his tounge out looking at Malina. My kuzco would be ass at flirting, but not to the point it would be borderline predatory 💀, my kuzco can take a hint from the one he loves, because he can actually view them as an equal, not continuously flirt with someone who’s acting as though they are not interested. They rushed things so hard with kuzco and Malina to the point it’s actually bothering me I would have liked them but the money hungry bigbacks at Disney fucked that shit up. The only thing good about this show is the humor, but not even because it’s actually funny but based on how completely up surd it is 💀. Like bro. TELL ME WHY DID YZMA IN ONE EPISODE LITERALLY TURN KRONK INTO A LLAMA TO EAT KUZCOS HOMEWORK 💀 he could have just eaten it in his human form 💀 or better yet have just stolen it so he actually wouldn’t have had an explanation at all💀💀💀 but no all these extra steps for what 💀. Also Pacha design is so ugly in the show it’s actually upsetting 💀 lie girl what the fuck is that this Mf is built like a lego now. OKAY BUT BAKC TO THE UPSURDITIES IKE SEEN LIKE CLIPS ON THE SHOW AND THE AMOUNT OF TIMES IVE SEEN KUZCO IN UNDERWEAR (I think the first episode he literally showed malina his underwear 💀💀 like dude I actually do not feel safe) OR HES SEEN NAKED OR WITHOUT PROPER CLOTHING LIKE DUDE 💀💀 and in the first couple episodes alone like girl- sorry I love him but I don’t wanna see him shower bro stop it. Like the show is only funny without context like bro and with the context it’s like popping a laxative and hot gluing ur ass shut like I feel like somethings wrong whenever I watch it 💀💀. Like girl. Also I’m sorry why are they trying to make kuzco be all smooth with Malina HE IS NOT SMOOTH LIEK LIL BRO BRO NO NO NO.💀

Okay I’m done ranting now 💗🙈 AGSHSHDH again if you like this show that’s fine, I like the idea of a Rayco TENS au but that’s literally it 💀 its funny and fun to hate on but that’s literally just my impression of the show so far so yea!!

[anotheruserwithnoname]

12 favourite things about Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

So I saw the Beetlejuice sequel over the weekend. I saw the original in the theatre nearly 40 years ago. And I admit was a bit nervous about whether the film would live up to the original, or would it be derailed by so many of the things that have caused remakes or continuations of legacy properties to fail in recent years. (Those factors vary from person to person but often boil down to either failing to recapture lightning in a bottle, or going against the spirit of the original in some way.)

I'll put in a spoiler break before I pass along my favourite things about the film, but the tl;dr is I had a blast, and I should never have doubted Tim Burton.

The following includes not only plot spoilers for B2, I also have to mention a major spoiler for the Wednesday series, so you are warned.

Favourite things about B2:

Jenna Ortega

Michael Keaton has managed the near impossible - reprising a role from decades ago without losing anything. It makes me sad that we'll never see his proper return as Batman in the now-lost Batgirl movie. I won't name specific names, but with only a couple of exceptions (most of them in Deadpool and Wolverine), so many times an actor reprising a role from years past has either failed to recapture the magic or does a good job but is still missing something that makes their reprise feel lesser in some way. You could splice together scenes of Keaton from B2 with scenes from B1 and you would be hard-pressed to tell the difference.

Jenna Ortega

Winona Ryder is terrific as the older Lydia. I loved the fact they made her a "paranormal-reality" TV star; I figured Lydia would have grown up to be either that or a goth-rock singer. I am not in favour of always darkening characters when they return after a while, but I think the idea of Lydia being haunted (literally) by her past and seeing dead people was well handled and does put a bit of a dark spin on the happy ending of B1. But in a way that works.

Jenna Ortega

For reasons best left to a google search, Jeffrey Jones was unable to appear in B2. His absence was well-handled by way of photographs, having his character lose his head, and a very clever and unexpected stop-motion sequence that at times looked like it was one of those wild AI-generated shorts.

Jenna Ortega

The change of style - the stop-motion, and the Italian art film pastiche that served as Beetlejuice's origin story - were a couple places where the film distinguished itself from the original. Same with Beetlejuice pulling a Deadpool a couple of times and talking to the audience.

Jenna Ortega. OK, seriously, she's a lot of fun in this and is a highlight of the film. My only complaint is they're not completely successful in separating her from Wednesday, both when she gets involved in a Beetlejuice-driven dance sequence, and a subplot where her character falls in love with a boy who turns out to be a villain - which is identical to what happens in Wednesday; the actors even look similar (there is the big Wednesday spoiler I warned about). That's one of the only major criticisms I have with B2, made a bit more glaring as Burton produced Wednesday and I think the film and show used the same writers. Jenna is in danger of being typecast which I'm sure she wants to avoid. I hope her star just continues to rise.

Bob. 'Nuff said.

Burn Gorman of Torchwood fame makes an unexpected appearance in the film as a preacher. He's quite funny to watch in his few scenes. He's become quite a good character actor over the years.

The Disney joke. Aside from the fact I know it'll play well with the many who have been turned off the House of Mouse for various reasons (including their treatment of various franchises and the never-ending Snow White saga), it has a different meaning when you realize that reportedly Burton had a bad experience making the live-action Dumbo for them, so this wasn't just a topical dig at Disney (like we saw in Deadpool) - this one was personal. When film scholars of the future write their books examining Burton's films and he and everyone else involved in his movies have collected their copies of the Handbook, the joke will probably get covered in quite a bit of detail, even though it comes and goes so quickly on screen.

One criticism I have is that Monica Bellucci's character doesn't really do too much. Reportedly Burton and Bellucci began dating while making the film so at least those two got something out of it. But her end was a bit overwhelming. I also felt Willem Defoe's character was underused. But if someone decided to do a spinoff of his actor-turned-underworld cop character, I think it could do well. I know both Bellucci and Defoe were playing plot maguffins - their purpose was to push things along to get to the Beetlejuice/Lydia reunion. But there could have been more. (I also didn't care for the fact no one thanked Beetlejuice for saving the lives (and souls) of Jenna's character by dealing with the boyfriend and everyone else by helping dispose of Monica. That's the only part of the film I disliked, but a minor point.)

Is B2 better than B1. I would say no, but it is an excellent film. I don't know if a third movie is justified, but the prospect of releasing a film called Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice may be too much temptation to ignore.

[loststarphounix]

I had this idea in mind for awhile now

but

Ultra Despair Girls (Boys) AU w/ Soudam

Kazuichi would be Komaru/the protagonist here, he isn't a Remnant of Despair here like Gundham due to unfortunate circumstances prior the tragedy :v

He is also using the megaphone Komaru uses in-game as his weapon, though he still kinda sucks at aiming lol

Gundham is still a Remnant of Despair and a deuteragonist like Toko. He would rather use his animals to attack enemies, but wouldn't mind a physical battle against his opponent either. He knows he'll come up on top either way.

There will definitely be changes to the plot, but I feel like their relationship will be like Tokomaru in-game :3

I like the way you think dear kazuichiswrench.

I have an AU that’s different to this, but has the same idea. But let’s go with yours!

Kazuichi awakens in a small apartment - the standard 1 bedroom, half bath and kitchenette. He’s taken everything electronic apart to pass the time lol, but also to create something to get out cause he’s claustrophobic asf and this small space ain’t it.

Cue him escaping when the doors unlock and running headfirst into danger lol Since it’s a slightly different AU, I’m gonna change it slightly and have Sakura save Kaz the first time. Byakuya is there, but Sakura is making him behave ™️

My theory is, is that they found Kazuichi and had him securely locked away in the same building with the other people who Junko threatened to kill in the first motive, up his door locked from the outside. He leave the Future Foundatiom to look for his friends and sees that the world has actually ended.

After the helicopter crashes, the story stays the same - he’s captured by the Warriors of Hope and made to play their “game”. I’ll add though, for my own personal reasons, that he gets freaked out seeing Nagito and tries to talk to him, but Nagito is too lost in the Despair to even notice him. Kazuichi feels deeply depressed by this and also angry but he can’t say a lot. When he encounters Gundham on the ground, it is during the Monokuma ambush, but Gundham finds it more thrilling to attack a “specter from the past”

Gundham thinks Kazuichi is a ghost or a demon sent to haunt for his sins until he can defeat him. Kazuichi has to fight him before he concedes, but it’s not an easy fight, what with his scaredy-cat cat nature making his aim unsteady and him not actually wanting to fight him. But he wins and Gundham forces himself into the adventure. He’s assured that Kazuichi will fail and fall into delight despair and wants to see the descent first hand, but he won’t help unless the mechanic is near death.

spoiler for anyone who hasn’t played or watched play throughs of Ultra Despair Girls

I like to imagine that when Nagito tries to kill Kazuichi, Gundham goes all out berserker and actually breaks the wrist of Junko’s stolen arm and before he can kill him, Kazuichi tackles him to the ground and while messy crying, he just confesses to him. And even though it doesn’t completely break the brainwashing - this ain’t Disney lol - it does make Gundham start to begin the process, making half of Junko brainwash and half of himself again.