#Dependent

[tumbler-polls]

Please reblog for a bigger sample size!

Submitted by @anon.

[naptimeneos]

⸝⸝ DEILIX - image id in alt id & under cut

(dependent + anisolix)

a DPD experience in which it affects how you show affection, social bonds, love, and/or care in general. It may feel submissive, inconsistent, overwhelming, or overall different to how people without DPD experience these things, and may cause issues with forming relationships or bonds. DPD version of anisolix by psychopunks & narcilix by obnebulant-mogai

coined by div ! original flag & orientation by psychopunks, flag based on one and two

(alt id ; two side-by-side flags. they are nearly identical, except for the middle stripe. this stripe is darker in the right flag. the flags have nine equally-sized stripes, which have the following colours from top to bottom: rose gold, dull pink, faded purple, solid pink, grape purple / dark scarlet, metallic blue, grey, pale chestnut, pale apricot.)

[thepersonalwords]

There is no death without life. Therefore, death depends entirely on life.

Mwanandeke Kindembo

[rottingskunkc0rpse]

[momentsbeforemass]

Dumb

One of the dumbest things I do is wait for things to calm down.

Telling myself that it will all be better after whatever I’m currently dealing with is over.

Putting off being at peace until something is finished. Making my peace dependent on having down time. Where everything else is at peace.

Here’s why it truly is one of the dumbest things that I do.

First, even if it works, it means that my peace will intermittent.

Second, it actually doesn’t work. Because that’s not how life works.

There’s the old line (attributed to a bunch of different people) that “history is just one thing after another.” That’s life in general. There really isn’t any down time, any off season where stuff stops happening – even for just a moment.

But the big reason it’s one of the dumbest things I do? If this is how I’m looking at things, then I’ve made what’s going on inside me dependent on what’s going on around me.

I’ve let myself be dependent on things that I cannot depend on. If that’s not self-sabotage, then I don’t know what is.

This is what I was thinking about when I read today’s Gospel. Peter is in a boat that’s being tossed about by the waves, because the wind is against it, when he sees Jesus walking on the water.

Peter says to Jesus, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.”

Jesus replies, “Come.”

Peter gets out of the boat and starts walking to Jesus on the water.

Then he looks around, sees how strong the wind is, sees how rough the waves are, and gets scared. When he does, he starts to sink and cries out to Jesus, “Lord, save me!”

Immediately, Jesus saves him.

The thing that sticks with me is that the wind and the waves didn’t die down when Peter got out of the boat.

Peter walks on the water – the same rough water that is still tossing the boat around, in the same wind that’s still whipping up the waves. In the middle of the wind and the waves, Peter walks along peacefully. Because Peter is focused on Jesus.

The moment he starts paying more attention to the wind and the waves? The moment he starts to focus on all the things that tell him that it’s impossible to walk along peacefully in the middle of a storm? He starts to sink.

The takeaway is obvious. So obvious that it embarrasses me to say that I struggle with this.

But I do. I keep focusing on the wrong thing, on the wind and the waves. On the stuff outside of me, the stuff that I can’t depend on. With my unspoken assumption that all that stuff has to be at peace, before I can be at peace.

If that’s not self-sabotage, then I don’t know what is.

So I’ll ask Him for help as I founder. And He’ll stretch out His hand and catch me.

Again. Because we’ve done this before.

I don’t know why, but He never grows weary of helping me.

That’s not true. Actually, I do know why.

And it’s why I know He’s the one that I can depend on.

Today’s Readings

[wanderingmind867]

I still haven't told my dad about my 14,000 posts on here, and I feel that adds a bit of a sour undercurrent to my interactions on here. Because my dad is my only friend in real life, and he deserves to know about me being on here. He tells me about his coworkers, he tells me some vague details about a new person he's texting with, but I don't have the guts to admit to making 14,000 posts in 2-3 years, and just never telling him? Well, that tracks for me. I am known for being cowardly and not saying stuff i'm worried will make people judge me. But I don't even think my dad would judge me that much! He'd probably understand! But would I forgive myself? Now that's the hard part...

[memepipboy]

My fiancée told me it’d be cool to have an alternate comic cover since I’m coming back to the series again and I was like damn baby that’s a good idea

[chronoport]

DEPENDENTDOLLiC !!

A gender under the genderdollic system related to being both dependent and a doll !!

@mogai-toybox

[dk-thrive]

I had neither the solace of company nor the solace of financial stability nor the solace of utility to others. I’d thought I was trading the last thing for the other two, but in reality I’d just been giving everything up.

— Sarah Manguso, Liars: A Novel (Hogarth, July 23, 2024)

[doeyedangel]

[dpdculture]

DPD culture is giving up when you need to put effort into being responsible for yourself, causing a strain in your friendships bc people feel pressured to help you (and you do want them to save you, but you know it's not fair to them)

DPD culture is

[picsfortheday]

[autisticdreamdrop]

DPD things 2

beating yourself up constantly in your head

[thepersonalwords]

There is no death without life. Therefore, death depends entirely on life.

Mwanandeke Kindembo

[brainspiraling]

One irritating assumption when someone (namely, especially a partner) finds out you have OCD, is that you are obsessed with them— which could be but isn't necessarily true.

My anxiety, a large portion of my intrusive thoughts mainly revolves around my loved ones getting hurt in some form, rather than them in particular or any relationship... unless they have given me very good, extensive reason to be anxious about it.

A different portion is dedicated to my own survival, or fulfillment of basic needs... which can seem like you're obsessed with someone when you're forced to depend on them to any extent, and the only control or ability you could have is through them.

For me, personally though... it has and likely never will be actually about an actual person.

[robertm0ntaguerenfield]

I am enough. And I have enough. I deserve happiness. I am grateful for all that I am, and I take pride in who I am today.