#Deep-seated Love
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Love Before Steroids
Love was so patient back in the day, it was deep-seated, and it needed time like rain for it to grow, there was an element of excitement, the absence of social media meant less comparison and more focus on a relationship, if it were concrete there was time for it to cure and solidify. It was a time when romance required a little more effort, meaningful conversations were earned, there was an artâŚ
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#Anxious Mailbox Moments#Apology Liberates#Arcade Games#Art of Love#Banished World#Bittersweet Goodbyes#Blanket Moments#Bored Room Love#Breakup Sorrows#Breezy Afternoons#Candle-lit Dinners#Car Sounds#Concrete Love#Cookie Tin Storage#Crinkled Letters#Date Nights#Deep-seated Love#Door Goodbyes#Effortful Romance#Envelope Recognition#Erwinism#Exciting Relationship#Floral Patterns#Formless Grief#FYP#Gold-weighted Letters#Gravel Path Walks#Green Light Moments#Hand-holding#Homework Excuse
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(ID in alt) this is national news to me
#ramblings of a lunatic#princess diaries#if. it's bad#(there is a strong chance it may be)#i will become evil#if it's just mediocre (again. strong chance) i may become more evil despite my deep seated love of the moderately inferior sequel-#-''the princess diaries 2: a royal engagement''#if it's somehow good I'll become the most annoying person on earth i think
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Got a bunch of Sasuke-centric asks, so here we are!
Sakura has some complicated feelings about Sasuke.
In my AU, Sakura was born to civilian parents who didn't really want her to become shinobi, even though that had been her dream for as long as she could remember- and it was no secret in the Haruno household that they were hoping she'd drop out, or at the very most, be career genin.
So Sakura never really had anyone to believe in her and had to go into the academy (late!) as a civilian-born, meaning she was automatically behind in development (and status) compared to the clan kids. (I headcanon that until the Academy, Sakura didn't ever spar with anyone, versus clan kids who had probably learned how to wield kunai before they knew how to walk).
So Sakura worked hard and did her absolute best to get the barest minimum that clan kids were afforded by default. Unfortunately, her best, without the resources/opportunities, just wasn't good enough. And Sakura knew it. Academically, she was brilliant, but that's not enough to be a good shinobi. And somewhere deep down, Sakura (at the very least Inner Sakura) knew it.
It's why I headcanon that she developed such a violent temper. People who are secure in themselves don't have such explosive, uncontrolled outbursts- it's why she picked on people like Naruto, who was probably the only person below her in the pecking order (maybe Tenten? But they're equals I guess). It's why she's so quick to anger and usually has those responses OUT of combat- it's because that's the only place her violence is actually effective.
It's also why she's such a teacher's pet- she needs validation from others to try and fill the gaping void.
So when Sasuke appeared on the radar, and everyone wanted him, so did Sakura. Because if she got him, she would do something that no one else- clan-privileged and better- could do. In fact, she staked most of her identity (her hair, her diet, her clothing) on it.
None of this was conscious. She really did have a crush on Sasuke, but the seed of it was born from a very misguided desire to prove herself on an even playing field.
After all, she didn't have a clan upbringing/resources to teach her how to find self-worth and actualization through her skills (she went home, and her civilian parents praised her for things that absolutely didn't matter in shinobi reality, amazement that she could throw a kunai! how good her grades were! and how cool it was that she could jump high!)
(and Kakashi absolutely didn't help, lol), so she defaulted to what she knew- which was being a regular girl with a regular crush.
Now, as an ~adult, she's come to the painful realization that her love for Sasuke was just a goalpost. Ironically, she set her sights on someone who would inadvertently feed into all of those insecurities, and because Sakura didn't love/believe in herself, she accepted Sasuke's abuse.
She also understands that she ran into the Chidori/Rasengan deathmatch of her own stupidity, but she just can't forgive Sasuke for leaving. For never owning up. 'Cause that's just coward behavior..
Basically, Sasuke's cruelty was just a reflection of her own self-loathing, and unfortunately, Sakura just wallowed in denial and ended up paying a hefty-ass price.
So if she ever sees Sasuke again? Honestly, she doesn't know whether she wants justice or revenge. It's complicated.
Whew- that was a text dump....
Once again, thank you so much to everyone for all the interest and asks! I'm so happy we can all share Naruto rotbrain together.
#naruto#haruno sakura#sasuke#tfw Sakura realizes that she doesn't even LIKE Sasuke let alone LOVE him#Sakura has a lot of deep seated insecurities about herself#which are all valid honestly#and she never had any teachers or family to back her up#i have no beef with SasuSaku but they're not right for each other in this AU#also no beef against Sasuke#he bby#coven!Sakura
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What is it with early/mid 2000's TV and making this exact man
#they're both hopelessly bi and constantly masking#also super smart#and cocky with deep seated self worth issues that stem from how their dad raised them#both in love with someone who can and will kick their ass#psych#psych 2006#psych tv#supernatural#spn#shawn spencer#dean winchester
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Knee deep in the Honda odyssey Loganâs yeeting Wade out is it casual now?
#logan wolverine#logan howlett#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#Deadpool#knee deep in the passenger seat#Wade would love chappel roan#this is canon#this has been going through my head all day#Iâll just start humming it#the brainrot is real#poolverine#deadclaws#honda odyssey
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casual || shoko ieiri
a/n: blame chappell roan for this leave me out of it
warnings: smut and angst lol maybe iâll write a part two
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you lay on your back, silk sheets softly rubbing your skin.
the smell of cigarettes fills your nose. your chest rose up and down, trying to catch your breath. you lift your hand up, feeling the warmth of her cigarette slip between your fingers.
you inhale it once before handing it back to her. the warm air filled your chest, blowing the rest out of your nose. you turned your back to her, closing your eyes. she traced the scratch marks on your back, placing a warm kiss down every one of them. âyouâre so pretty.â she kissed your neck, wrapping her arms around you. if only it was like this forever.
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âiâll see you guys next week.â nanami waved to all of you, minus gojo.
âgood bye!â you slurred out, pulling out the keys to your apartment. âyouâre too drunk, baby.â shoko was behind you, helping you put the keys into the door, kissing your neck. you stumbled in, shoko holding you from your waist. âslow down, baby.â she turned you around, kissing you softly.
âyou were killing me with this dress, you know that right?â she tugged at your straps, making her way down your neck. âyou eyed me down like crazy.â you teased back. âalmost got us caught.â she pulled her hair from her neat ponytail.
oh yeah. you had forgotten. you guys werenât âoutâ or whatever shoko had said. you guys were nothing more than close best friends to the world. it hurt your heart, knowing she had confessed her love to you, endless night making love, endless pet names and lovely touches from her.
ââm sorry.â you leaned into her. âitâs okay, princess. just made me think of you a lot. canât leave much up to the imagination in this dress, especially gojo. you know how he feels about you.â she giggled, slowly unzipping your dress.
she pushed you against the couch, pulling your dress completely off your body. she kissed down your body, praising you each time she kissed you. she took off her pants, straddling your lap. she leaned down, her hands toying with your clit. âi love you, baby.â she kissed you, suppressing your words and moans.
âi love you, i love your body. i love everything about you.â she kissed your nape, her fingers inside of you now. âshoko.â you whispered, back arching against the couch. âi love you so much, my baby.â She pushed your hips down, her fingers sliding in and out of you, her pace quickening with every word.
you wanted to cry. she said these things to you, but did she really mean it? where you just someone to fuck after a stressful day? someone to toy around? but god, you were so in love with her, everything about her. youâd pretend like you werenât hurt after youâd try and hold her hands, just for her to slip hers away and play it off. when sheâs pick someone else to sit by instead of you, avoid eye contact and only answer at night. sheâd only show up at night when she craved you.
you held her wrist, eyes rolling back. âcum for me, baby, show me how much you love me.â she looked straight into your eyes, lust filled in them as your body shook, nails scratching her back, her name coming out in sobs.
you push her away, sitting up. shoko pulled away, eyes lowering. you get up, rushing to your bathroom. she stood up, watching as you slammed the door. you threw a shirt on that was on your floor, hands combing through your messy hair. loud sobs echoed through the apartment.
âare you okay, did i hurt you?â shoko knocked on the door. you held your chest, tears pouring out of your eyes. âlet me in.â shoko jiggled the doorknob. it scared her honestly.
you finally understood. you were nothing but a fuck toy for her, something to keep her entertained at night, someone to make her feel alive. you thought she was in love with you. you thought maybe youâd get married and leave all this sorcerer bullshit behind.
âjust leave.â you cried, head leaning against the door. âiâm not leaving. whatâs wrong?â she tried opening the door again. âlet me in, princess.â the name made you spiral all over again.
âjust go! you donât even care about me!â your hands gripped the floor, loud sobs ripping from your chest. âiâm not leaving. i do care about you, what are you talking about?â shokoâs brows furrowed. you stood up slowly, unlocking the door. shoko slowly opened it, meeting your tired eyes. your makeup was ruined and your shirt was wet.
she came in for a hug. you pushed her off, tears brimming again. âwhat is wrong with you?â shoko frowned. âyou donât even like me. iâm nothing but someone to fuck, arenât i? you donât ask me on dates, you donât even look my direction outside of my house. fuck, nanami pays my tab because you donât even look at me.â you cried. she stayed silent, at loss of words.
âsave your fucking breath. i understand now. i was so stuoud, falling in love with you. iâm a hookup.â you step back, face falling into your hands. âi wasnât supposed to get attached. this was casual to you.â you cried.
âiâm sorry. i sm in love with you, i justâŚi donât want to lose you.â âyouâre a fucking liar. get out, itâs to late to save your ass.â you sob, shaking your hair. âpleaseâŚâ she held her hand out.
she stepped back, her hands meeting the bathroom door handle. âiâm sorryâŚâ she closed the door behind her.
#knee deep in the passenger seat#AND YOURE EATINF ME OUT#CRYINF#chappell roan#the woman you are#I LOVE YOU CHAPPELL#shoko pls#shoko ieiri#shoko x reader#shoko smut#jjk shoko#shokohime#jujutsu kaisen shoko#jujutsu shoko#shoko fluff#shoko smau#jjk ieiri#ieiri shoko x reader#jujustu kaisen#jjk imagines#jjk fanfic#jjk is killing me#jjk angst#jjk oneshot#jjkedit#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk#jjk smut
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We are in a category 2 autism even about Skyblock kingdoms with an unconfirmed but high probability of advancing to a category 3. Followers are urged to seek shelter or become one with the storm, as damage to the Tumblr blog is likely.
#RAHHHHHHHH GOING TO EXPLODE#I'm really normal about this can't you tell#I love Avid and Marmalade and Ruby andâ#okay but back to Avid for a second#picture a morally ambiguous character with deep-seated trauma and well-intentioned but extremist ideals#now make him a silly little monkey with impulse control problems that loves his friends very much. and also he's super funny#it's Avid!!!!#pls go watch Skyblock kingdoms#idea speaks#idea original post
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Thistle & Falin
Just my narrative of Thistle & Falin, collection of shippy thoughts and dynamic analysis. Creating some imagery and threads, etc. What if we both made devotion to our loved ones our purpose, what if we both hadnât lived for ourselves in a long, long time. Who are we? Beyond who we love and our powers, what are we?
Background info: a short Falin analysis touching on Faligon and Thistle + an old thistlin post, compiling most of their moments. Here I delve into further thoughts but for base analysis of what they have in canon and in potential those are good starts. If you want I also have a full Falin analysis.
Disclaimer: Beyond the nebulous 1000 years I place Thistle as a young adult, and though I agree Falin mothers him to some degree I donât think itâs unsimilar to the way that Marcille is a mom friend that sometimes mothers Falin and Izutsumi especially. Their relationship has layers like every other one in Dunmeshi, reducing it to being incestuously motherly or age discoursy to justify it being problematic is so funny to me, hello did you miss the mind control. Ah yes I love the 1090 yo with godlike powers being groomed by his chicken slave. You can have your own interpretation but canon is ambiguous enough, and dare I say intentionally ambiguous, that I have no qualms with not infantilizing Thistle, same with Yaad at the end of canon. I do ship Thistle and Falin, and although itâs in a nebulous qpr-or-other third secret thing situationship instead of conventionally romantic way, like, I puke on anything giving them a parental framing so donât come shitting on my doorstep, kid-Thistle truthers be warned. Only nuance enjoyers allowed on this post. Itâs valid if youâre uncomfortable with the ship!! Donât make your issue othersâ problem.
I thankfully finished my Falin analysis before posting this, but besides that I also have an analysis coming on the whole Thistle age thing which I think is interesting, beyond the well being poisoned there are things to explore there, idk in how long thatâll be done though. Thatâs all for plans that are relevant to this, now letâs get into it.
Part 1
So my favorite Falin things are Faligon + her sense of being like a pawn/misplaced, going on autopilot to follow the wishes of others, a feeling of identity being a burden and sort of fleeing from that, and her not really caring in the way/with the intensity that sheâs "supposed" to (as per the points I go over in my Falin analysis). Meanwhile, Thistle has a lot of shit going on already but then thereâs also how being a dungeon lord is highly wearing on his mind. As Faligon and as dungeon lord Thistle, the way theyâre both so out of touch with reality in different ways holy shit?? They have power imbalance between them and it very much comes from mind control lol, but itâs also not something Thistle is fully aware of himself, because the powers are driving him unstable and heâs not even aware thereâs someone in front of him really. Heâs so out of it that he canât even recognize that the dragon has been fused with a human and sheâs so out of it we canât even tell how conscious of her actions she is.
And then the interesting thing is that theyâre kind of in it together⌠Mostly from Falinâs standpoint. We see that he does rely on the dragon increasingly so, hanging out with it, being saved by it and embraced by her etc. When he lets them both fall after breaking the web they were hanging from, he automatically, fully and wordlessly trusts her to catch him, instead of relying on magic or anything, and she does. Falin devotes herself to him but heâs devoted to The Cause which is just chasing ghosts at this point. But despite it all thereâs a weird comfort here too⌠From the guy who in his last moment of lucidity reached out for someone, anyoneâs hand, from the guy who hasnât felt companionship in hundreds of years probably, hasnât taken it slow and slept and eaten in who knows how long, from the girl who feels compelled to care after him like sheâs always done with others⌠And the beast-ness allows her to have some freedom to figure herself out in a weird way, to simply enjoy being beside someone and doing anything her own whims tell her to.
Itâs very destructive and weird and layered but likeâŚ. I can see the sliver where it works out. Where her kindness reaches him and he has a moment of lucidity where he sees her and itâs like, wait, who are you, youâre not the dragon?? Where finding someone else who feels just as messed up and devoted as them, like theyâre just trudging along life like itâs a dream following their loved one, heals them a bit. Where caring for the other becomes a way to care for themselves too, a dark mirror of each other that shows you, oh, this is how bad it can get and I want to choose something else for myself actually. To grow to see the person standing in front of you, instead of only searching with your eyes in what way theyâll reflect on you. In helping each other, finding some companionship thatâs weirdly vulnerable and self-healing. He gets her in touch with herself and her own needs again through the arc and conflict they have, and she gets him in touch with the world and his surroundings again. They have clashing ways to be selfless, very self-sacrificial from Falin meanwhike self-centered with Thistle (he âknows bestâ, âeverything needs to be left to himâ, etc etc, he needs the control, but he does it all for others, meanwhile Falin leaves that control to others and only grabs it for herself in exceptional cases like sacrificing herself to the dragon for Laios).
Like just let yourself be, damn!!! So then them being like, zombie mentally stunted babies kind of enhances that theme in a way too lol. The way they communicate together is very⌠Instinctive and basic, and Iâd love to see how it could develop into a functional dynamic. Theyâre in âlearning to be your own personâ kindergarten together to me. Thistle looking at her coloring wildly outside the lines and being like "youâre doing it wrong" and then you look at his and he colored everything a weird color. The precision is scary but then his crayon goes 1 mm out of the lines and he blows up into tears. Ok the metaphor has run its course
So yeah like the ship/brotp is very, them being isolated and against the world together and like⌠Slowly regaining their minds together. Getting their sense of identity grounded into them again. In my mind they have a 50k words adventure where they hang out and he slowly realizes thereâs more to her than just dragon and she encourages him to dawdle around and eventually just play in water and shit and itâs like, starting to see life again beyond the laser focus you limited yourself to⌠And sheâs allowed to just chill out and do whatever she wants besides the whole searching for Delgal thing. You canât tie down a dragon! They are a duo they are an unitâźď¸ Heâd have been fucked without her and at this point in time he sort of made her and heâs her world. Traumabonded kittens do not separate but itâs onesided in different ways haha. Honestly itâs sort of reflavored mickuro wait fuckâŚ
If nothing else, theyâre a very interesting dynamic to ponder. The depths of it all⌠I want to use them as a social experiment. I want them to stop to smell at the flowers and learn to work together⌠Theyâre master and servant theyâre owner and pet theyâre mothering and mothered (in a guardian hound way, in a mom friend way) theyâre both incredibly (emotionally and physically) vulnerable in different waysâŚâŚ Master and monster if you will. Mostly I see them as guardian & leader. Like I said I ship them but itâs not really romantic atp I think but itâs not quite qpr either itâs truly a weird secret third thing⌠What if we were sort of coworkers but also ?!!!>??????! You should hate me but you fiercely protect me I should appreciate you but I only see you as a tool WHAT IS GOING ONNN IN THERE
He wants to be protected even if he canât really admit it. Here the catalyst was emotional distress moreso than physical threat. Notice how he lays there under her wing for a bit as he (refuses to) processes what Mithrun told him about Delgal dying and betraying him. Sheâs becoming his safety net, his comfort hound. Somehow, the both of them find theyâre soothed in each otherâs presence.
It kills me. Them being so toxic at the start of it, then somehow ambiguously just hinting towards how things could have went on to be better, could have been headed somewhere nice and healing and healthier, she dies and he dies everyone fucking dies and they forget each other and it ends there they never speak of each other again. Canon wanted me dead specifically. Like remember too that I was there when the last chapters where being released, my ass really was like "Oh I wonder how Falin will react seeing Thistle after being revived!" 𤥠But yess at least that means thereâs a lot of Unsaid, a lot of space for speculation, and I want to see what could have been. I want to see it so so bad. Itâs so interesting
Post-canon is also so interesting, where theyâre sort of recovered but not fully not really, them actually getting to know each other⌠And she doesnât remember him but he doesnât remember her either, in a way theyâve never met even though they have, even though she was the first one on his side since so long, the first hint of companionship heâs had, companionship that heâs so unused to getting that he canât even recognize it for what it is. He couldnât even recognize a human standing in front of him!! He is so disconnected from others and the world!! He spoke to ghosts like they had no worries in the world and everyone was ok!! Heâs out of touch, tone-deaf af!! Has always been tone-deaf!! Being tone-deaf when he was younger, a stick in the mud, caused him to be more isolated than he already was⌠Autism4autism, anywaysâ
Itâs them not knowing why or how to express it but being drawn together, a bond forged together by the fire of circumstances and coincidencesâ or is it only that? No one can know for certain but thereâs a grip they have on each other there somehow. Weird distant caring thing. I dont know who you are but I feel like I should know you
Itâs like my headcanon that she doesnât know why, but on her travels she feels something when she comes across wild thistle flowers⌠There are just faint remnants, whispers of feelings like ghosts.
They should be remnants in each otherâs lives. A deja vu of a person in the way Falin hugs small dolls to her chest, or how Thistle reminisces of something when he sees bird feathers discarded on the ground. < This paragraph courtesy of @cabinetteâs huge brain
He canonically writes poems btw⌠Poems would be such a good way for him to get in touch with himself again post-canon, find desires in again and get creative fulfillment. He should make poems about her. To explore and vent and express all the vague feelings and memories he has, both those of during canon and after canon. He doesnât remember her but he remembers her, slivers of kind eyes and warm gentle hands and healing magic like a blanketâŚ
Yaad, an unlicensed therapist but the best you're gonna get in fantasy land: Maybe you should try journaling.
And too the thing is their relationship with each other in a way is ONLY about themselves, even when Falin is being self-sacrifical itâs less about him and more about how she generally is, that sort of instinct to latch onto someone and just follow along with whatever they do and ask, meanwhile to Thistle sheâs only ever been a factor in his plans. Idk idk them getting to that point where they see and know each other, stumbling into that through canon or actively working towards it post-canon, thereâs weird beauty in that Like. Thistle cares about her because heâll take anyone as long as they fit the job description well enough, heâs desperate to find Delgal and will grasp at straws to find him. In a similar way that heâll reach for someone, anyoneâs hand on the verge of death, she seeks to protect someone, anyone. Thatâs how she centers herself, makes someone her compass and her world. Falin wants to protect someone and Thistle would use anyone, pushed to the states they were in they would latch onto anyone for comfort (caring for him, grabbing Marcilleâs hand).
Mirrors truly truly. And Thistle likes to shatter those, and silence anyone who tries to talk to him about reality, so then the option left is to be by him quietly and subtly gradually, gently (her specialty) nudge him in the right direction ⌠Nooo but actually why did he shatter those mirrors. Very interesting to think about. Would seeing himself in others anger him?
I like to call him a ghost of who he was sometimes, a ghost of the past, heâs so haunted, and I think thereâs fun imagery there too. The care she offers Thistle somewhat reminds me of the one she offers ghosts. I wonder if part of it is that she sees herself in ghosts, that she wants to offer them freedom and peace of mind she canât get for herself.
And of course meanwhile on her end, the thistlin arc is also about growing self-respect. I donât want to see Thistle as a lost cause in saying that her efforts are wasted on him, but being so permissive and invested in him is obviously not healthy for her. She needs to learn when to put her foot down
Oooh, just realized that choosing to eat in this scene was a big character moment all things considered. By eating she faltered in her task, stood up for herself and her needs, was selfish for once (/positive go get your damn food girl). She chose to eat. Anyways
I bet heâs the one who healed her wounds after the Shuro party fight. And on that noteâ itâs interesting he could change her form from Falin to Faligon without touching her isnât it? Healing by everyone else like Marcille and Falin always required touch, physical contact between the healer and healee, which some like Chilchuck say is a negative, but⌠The dungeon lord not needing to touch to heal makes a nice metaphor for how isolating the powers are I think. Truly clinical instead of warm. Theme of community and freely offering affection in Dungeon Meshi etc etc. Like I said, Thistle is out of touch.
The way that he has the powers to change her form and heal and like soo much magic power but he canât even realize when heâs hurting himself and sheâs the one who has to heal him. Heâs so fully devoted to the cause even when he acts selfishly that he neglects himself too, and she has to remind him to take care of himself, to eat, etc. That she feeds him. Eating is an act of love to yourself and to life. The berries, the curry, the soup that Thistle refuses to eatâ
Do you see the vision. Do you see all the narrative relevance and themes and parallels of their dynamic. To chase ghosts, to cling onto them so they stay with you no matter how warped and ugly they get, and to soothe souls, purifying them and helping them depart for the afterlife⌠Both magic prodigies whose lives revolve around protecting and caring after their loved ones more than anything else. A family member who looks elsewhere while they are their whole world. They can flee their emotional issues together đ¤ Who are we? Beyond who we love and our power, what are we? I think about the way she cradled him in her arms just before they fell down into the dungeon all the time idk idk
^ End notes from the one fic I wrote about them so far: Slivers, on AO3. For a moment, they were both slivers of themselves, bound together.
Thistle feverishly holding onto ghosts of the past and his source of power, meanwhile Falin cradles the people she can protect in the now with the powers that reside in her⌠Him cradling his book, her cradling her masterâŚâŚâŚ Parallels
Interlude
And yess itâs important to remember too, Thistle became a mage only after delgal asked⌠He had innate talent, but moreso than Falin itâs through studies that he learned to actually harness his magic etc. Idk I think itâs an interesting parallel that could have interesting stuff be done on it. People often characterize him as predominantly bratty but. Heâs smart and composed heâs mainly smart and composed⌠Heâs unstable and everything during canon was happening all at once with the winged lion being freed and Laiosâ party and the canaries and agh </3 He can have a meltdown as a treat heâs smart and cool-headed if it wasnât for the dungeon wearing on his mind ok⌠Obvi I love my chars with anger issues but saying heâs overly childish is having tunnel vision I think
Ok so the elephant in the room⌠First of all how present is Falin in Falugon exactlyâŚâŚ We have no clue. The end sequence does show her in purgatory with a dragon foot holding her down, which can easily be read as it suppressing her personality- with how itâs shown though it feels like sheâd be fully suppressed by that? And we know thatâs not the case, since not only does she recognize Laios and calls out to him, she hesitates to hurt Kuro because of the dog association, sheâs excessively kind towards Thistle, the latter which her Adventurerâs Bible profile confirm to be "her kind nature remaining as the chimera". Maybe itâs a dream-like state? Maybe the dragon is the driving force with the instincts, and itâs only bits of Falin and her personality that show through? A state of mind very primal and not very think-y, even if Falin has enough brains to think of sharing the berries, gesturing and oh- of course, casting magic. No issues with controlling the human half of her body as well. To some degree, her and the dragon are working in tandem. My own preferred interpretation is the driven by instincts one, a state of mind like an actual dragonâs, which in my Falin analysis I delve into the significance of it for other parts of Dunmeshi too. So yeah, dreamlike mindless autopilot⌠I think exploring her pov as Faligon would go super hard. Aware of her surroundings but sort of disconnected with it, and disconnected from herself too, entirely living in the present⌠And like with her talking to Laiosâ the only time she speaks in her chimera form, a simple observation, "Laios, brother", sometimes her human thoughts peek through more sharply, short moments of lucidity⌠I think itâd be interesting to see an arc where as the chimera, she learns to share the "brainspace" more with the dragon.
Itâs also unclear if Thistle had a say in how much of âFalin the humanâ is in control? He very well might have suppressed her somehow when he changed her form to be more dragonlike. That might also be due to just getting back the dragon meat thoughâ and the dragon meat itself might be why/how the brainspace is shared. There is a lot less of Falinâs body in the chimera than there is of the dragon, body mass wise. Dungeon Meshi is a lot about physicality so I wouldnât be surprised with this reasoning. But thereâs the whole mind control soul bond situation tooâŚ
The mind bond is another thing thatâs left mostly to interpretation when it comes to the details. She feels compelled to listen to the dungeon lordâs orders as a monster created and owned by it, like the dragons Thistle summoned during the fight at his house, but again like we see with the dragons, if the monster has a "strong will" it can disobey to some level without being punished by the bind or anything. The eyes of the magician, the small wyverns, level-of-control wise canât be accurate examples because theyâre sort of like familiars, Thistle can see through their eyes in real time no matter where they are but itâs only this species as far as we know. So otherwise the mind bond is more subtle⌠Thereâs also the question of how much the control is shared between the dungeon lord and the demon, which again Thistleâs situation is exceptional because he managed to seal his demon in a book, presumably all the power goes through Thistle without the intermediate of the winged lion, though we do see he has some reach since he reaches Laios through his dreams. ANYWAYS all that to say. I do really ponder about how a dungeon lord's monsters get their orders, like... For the fight on the first floor, did Falin just feel Thistle's agony in her bones and came clawing and barging her way in desperately and angrily to protect him because of his distress, or did he more directly demand she come, consciously or not?! Idk, since Falin is actively protective of him unlike the dragons who reluctantly listen to him, her being very fast and intense about it doesnât have to be forced⌠Itâd be interesting if she can sense his feelings, wants or thoughts, bc I donât think itâs as conscious as like, telepathically communicating "hey you, do this"âŚ? Pondering, pondering. Mind bond <3 Soulbound <3
Theyâre both very trapped in the past⌠I wonder if as Faligon a lot of her mind goes back to memories of Laios and such, if sheâs in a dreamlike state and not just sort of absent, where would her mind retreat... I donât think so like I said I think sheâs mostly driven by dragonlike mindlessness, but still⌠Thistle stuck in the search of Delgal, thinking back to everything theyâve shared and where it all went wrong obsessively, and Falin, sort of larping that sheâs still beside Laios, not unlike how Thistle treats having the corpses of the royal family at his house like them being safe. Delusions. Idk I just want more character studies.
The metaphors in this truly⌠Itâs not literal, like def not something that happens during canon at no point are they or could be ever atop a mountain of frames and paintings of the Golden Kingdomâs royal family and fine art lmaoo, so then like the meaning behind it all⌠She offers him reprieve, an outsider from all the Golden Kingdom expectations and drama, just someone warm to lean on, someone whoâll stayâŚâŚ.. I love Faligon pushing him to rest and nap so much. Man has first nap in a thousand years. Feather duvet like a nice warm pillow. The peace she offers him manâŚâŚ. Live in the present bbygirl Unfortunately it doesn't help. Look at them eyebags⌠Man needs to sleep!!
Part 2
^ This panels drives me crazy Itâs the possessivity. Itâs the "my". Itâs the "stealing".
What if you have fear of abandonment and think you have to prove your worth for people to stay by your side. What if belonging to someone makes you feel like you belong and you feel loved and soothed by it lowkey, feel like it makes things easy. What if I was bought as a slave and servant but I was adopted into a pretty loving family. What if ownership is what love looks like to me. What if thatâs why I have no problem rationalizing keeping people against their will in a glorified kingdom-prison, because thatâs just what someone with the power who Knows Better does, and⌠Did he always call her his dragon hello? Feelings
He is not letting it go damn He hates when people mess with what's his. Or Delgalâs.
But imagine. The dragon is like, the last thing he has. The Golden Kingdom has moved on from him, everything is shit, but his dragon is the last thing he still has some realm of like. Ownership over. But that ownership is kinda just his sense of belonging. His role, his duty.  So itâs like "Donât steal the last thing I have" especially if post-canon⌠Itâs thinking from his time as a jester bought into a loving family that ownership is natural in love and care. Itâs thinking thatâs the way you get to belong beside someone, beside earning that through achievements and being useful and capable. Everything is being stolen away from him. Control and things and people and even the importance he has to the Golden Kingdom as he becomes part of the background & past history and the kingdom switches into new hands aka LaiosââŚ
My dragon, not the dragon. I do like to imagine especially after the berries heâs starting to feel differently about her. He keeps being like "youâre acting odd, dragon". His dragon is special. Sheâs not just another regular monster npc to easily replace, thereâs human contact in there. His dragon just for him. <3
I do think Falin has some issues with like, asking to be with the people she loves, feeling safe in asking for that, that sheâs worth that. She follows them and is quiet and just takes the crumbs of love that they offer, she doesnât ask Marcille at the academy to spend lunches with her, doesnât ask anything of her distant busy father and ill anxious mother⌠The person she did ask things of, Laios, who she always asked to go travel the world with him and whatnot, left her behind. Like how Delgal left Thistle. Theme of leaving </3 theme of family and abandonment issues </3 So she just follows and cares after them and makes herself useful and is grateful she gets to be beside them at all. So yeah what Iâm saying is being owned/belonging to someone might feel yeah like, belonging. Being One Person's. Heâs seen her at her worst and most bloody and raw, and still wants her? Very comforting And especially post-canon he doesnât need her to be witty or useful or such, he just needs her love and thatâs what she has lots to give.
Do you think Falin wants to be needed⌠Do you think sheâs a little restless if she doesnât feel like she is, like she thinks just like Laios people might leave you behind and you never see them again. Itâs also because of what she said, that she put others before herself, that she just followed/imprinted on her parents/Laios/Marcille. She avoided conflict, she wanted to be liked and live in peace. The only times she was selfish, she hurt people (left school for Laios, sacrificed herself for them, teleported them out despite possibly hurting people on the surface), so she chooses to be selfless instead. "One of the most selfish things i've ever done was barely even for the sake of myself" - Falin and Toshiro both hah Falin is often told she doesnât care the right way or not enough, youâre cutting classes Falin, Iâm upset you left me and you donât even seem to think itâs a big deal Falin, you shouldnât have sacrificed yourself to save me (her not noticing her ostracization in her village wasnât told to her but Iâm including it also). And with Toshiro when considering her proposal, she was worried to accept because yeah itâs have been convenient but she wouldnât be reciprocating his feelings in the way he wants and expected her to with what he asked of her⌠And sheâs worried it wouldnât be right⌠Bc she doesnât care about the proposal on the same level he doesâŚ.. I just think thatâs neat I think that Falin caring both too little and too much, with laser focus on Laios & Marcille neglecting even herself, is a big part of her. She focuses on others and their emotional needs so so much always, babygirl be selfish for a whileâŚ
Thistleâs interaction with Laios is interesting too, especiaoly when Kaios heals him. How he looks at his shoulder, surprised and confused⌠Guy who's used to not having his personal needs met because he's so busy doing everything for the people he cares about receives care??? Woah thatâs crazy Something something being so unused to human contact and affection that you donât know how to process it and donât recognize it when it happens/stares you right in the face. Thistle the Toudens are gonna make you open up ur heart to humans again on godâŚ
What if⌠He doesnât want to admit sheâs not the dragon. If he admits itâs not the dragon that means giving up some control⌠This was not in his plan, he doesnât know how well he can control a chimera rather than a dragon, itâs weakness itâs vulnerability itâs feeling like heâs losing his grip on everything again and thus losing his place and purpose. HmmâŚ
Finding yourself through someone else⌠Because defining yourself through others is what youâve always done⌠Yeah. Yeah.
I do love it tying into Falinâs arc of finding herself. Like, she doesnât remember her time as a chimera, she just remembers this guy she has conflicted but fond feelings of for some reason, so say if they travel post-canon, traveling with him would also be a way to figure out more how sheâs feeling, and then thereâs how when looking at him she gets the feeling that itâs been a long time he hasnât lived for himself either⌠And like for him traveling is about seeing the world a bit too. Seeing it not as something to control or always dangerous but something to explore, and just enjoy the little things instead of worrying about the court. And just. Aghhhh. He hasnât had someone on his side for centuries. Sighs. Of course Yaad also becomes that largely but traveling post-canon with Falin⌠Would love to see that in fancontent
Them growing to SEE each other, with the film in front of their eyes slowly fading away. Both of them coming out of it more genuine than theyâd been even before meeting, before becoming warped, growing more comfortable in their skin and with the thought of connecting with others. Itâs the mutual care <33 itâs having been on each otherâs side at both your ugliest <3 Unconventional caring...
Toshiro saying "you canât tie down a dragon" is always so good⌠Someone should so do stuff with that. "But you can tame it" / "I tried to once" / "but she chose to stay with me anyways"⌠Musical theme of How to Train your Dragon starts playing in the distance
When/after they get together, I feel like their relationship isnât something they like to label⌠If anything itâs like. Partner. Or calling each other by name⌠Him calling her my dragon, except now itâs warm and personal would be so. Aughh <3 But then that just also makes the first time he calls her by name so huge.
Conclusion
They and their relationship is weird and unusual but thatâs just how they are, and how they need to accept themselves (again: as they are) and roll with it! And make a place in the world for them anyways!
Magic forced them to be vulnerable in front of each other but itâs them who have to like⌠Be pushed out of their passivity and do something with that vulnerability.
BROTHERSSS THEYâRE BOTH ALL ABOUT BROTHERS. LEAVING. OUT OF TOUCH WITH REALITY. OUT OF TOUCH WITH THEMSELVES AND THEIR OWN IDENTITY. In a twisted way only the other would understand what itâs like.
Thistlin is so crazy, in humanizing you it humanizes me, in recognizing you for what you are I get more back in touch with the world again.
Flighted birds have hollow bones. With freedom there are risks and drawbacks. Thistle was Falinâs.
Itâs not everyday you can have a ship where both characters are out of touch with reality and others and themselves and have this weird almost innate bond of her being compelled to protect him and care for him and him holding onto that unknowingly⌠Even if he didnât need to, keeping her by himself and sitting on her while he plans and has a panic attackâŚ.. And also he owns her and robbed her of her freedom & body & full mind but she still wuvs him. Weird intimacy with the guy who horrifically changed you into something else, and yet is not even aware he has done it.
Falin loves nature and Thistle is named after a flower⌠Her post-canon coming across wild thistles and feeling a rush of fondness and she doesnât know why⌠Thistles have thorns, but they taste sweet. Just gotta peel them off and enjoys the sweet taste of it once itâs open <3 Eat it like them honeysuckles
Slice of life 40k words thistlin sitcom I need you. Donât make me write it myself. Sob
You are so so close sweetieâŚ
wutiwant
I don't know what I want But I know it's not this These words don't mean nothing Once they left my lips More awake inside of my dreams Was that really you, next to me? Give me what I want, who am I supposed to please? Who am I supposed to please? Who am I? Who am I? I? Give me what I want Give me what I want
Some links, since the pair is small enough that finding stuff for them can be hard: Falin & Thistle search on pixiv Falin & Thistle search on danbooru Ao3: Thistle x Falin, Thistle & Falin Ship names: ăăĄăŞăˇăš / ăˇăšăăĄăŞ. Thistlin
My own spotify playlists: Thistle & Falin, Thistle, Falin
source v
#Early thistle my beloved#Qpr or romo who knows Thistle has a job so he donât really care about that rn#Theyâre only allowed to send each other mind waves and feed each otherâs deep seated loneliness in ways neither can express#Like how do u even begin talking about these two damn. Sighhh. Looking wistfully out my window#Fumi rambles#Thistle#falin touden#thistlin#falisle#Maybe lol#thistle x falin#A buddy said theyâre like ghibli romance and then my mind got consumed by a spirited away au for them#Sissel#Dunmeshi rarepairs#Analysis#Like I often say I love to explore a character through a relationship and for Thistle thatâs Falin to me#The arc of it all⌠âare you even a dragon or whatâ youâve been acting strange since you changed formsâ progress omgâŚ. You are so close#Making castles out of the building blocks canon gave us#Theyâre both devoted body and soul to their brothers like augh. They both drive themselves into the ground for them#This is really just a collection of thoughts and i repeat myself a lil. The structure of this is so shite feel free to just skim or whateve#Their lives are centered around otherssss i canât get over it#Psspspsps thistlin fans come you are sweet now my sweet child. If anyone wants 5.5k words of thistlin meta here u go#Happy 1 year in the dunmeshi fandom to me. Going back to my roots#Spoilers
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Inspired by @aidakhar 's dad!Knives AU (brainrot-inducing)
After venturing out, Azrael gets caught by ill-intentioned individuals
#trigun#trigun stampede#millions knives#oc#dad!knives au#cw blood#cw decapitated head#comic#shinxo art#hi.. i finally went on the website to be able to upload more than 10 pics...#humbly offering this comic as proof of its power to capture and stimulate the imagination 𤲠endless praise to aidakharđŤĄ#only needed 2 days to thumbnail the pages bc i fREAKING LOVE THIS AU and got hit by the INSPIRATION BEAM#it has been giving me lots of â¨ď¸thoughtsâ¨ď¸ about Knives's approach to raising a child#also knives going berserk for his boyđ¤#my hc is that he wouldn't want his kid to see/experience the hostility of the world (towards plants)#bc then maybe the kid would get to grow up in a gentler environment than he had#he'd still have this deep-seated hatred and violence towards humans but want to hide it from azrael and only show him his softer side#bc he doesn't want the stars in azrael's eyes to fade if he realizes the same things he did
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Something about Sachika's name (嚸ć) and the kanji for "happiness" (嚸) being the first new kanji Shouma learned to write on Earth and the implication that he carefully copied the kanji Sachika first wrote in his sweets diary so he could use it in his episodic farewell letter warms my battered, bruised heart. It's like there's an overlap between Shouma wanting to make other people happy and finding happiness in his human friends. He can't have one without the other, which is further reason for him to stay at Hapipare in the future
#14shyx#kamen rider#kamen rider gavv#kr.gavv: episode 2#i love the episodic farewell letters and shouma's 'how to learn to write kanji' handwriting#i can't wait to get a little collection of screenshots for them :3#btw all of shouma's scenes with sachika were so cuteeeee i already love them#he's so earnest and sweet and she's a bubbling sparkling glass of joy#they kinda remind me of goseiger alata and eri - the most adorable pair ever#there's also stuff i noticed about sachika i.e. she has some deep-seated loneliness/sadness and her natural cheer overcompensates for it#but that's discussion for another post
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i feel like. theres designing a character with certain themes and motifs in mind, and then theres making a gijinka for the water bottle on my nightstand
#me when im the only person on the bus wearing a mask: i should make a furry plaguesona#its hard to explain bc. most of the time i try NOT to give my characters a 'strong' theme like making their whole design around#one thing like apples or even broad stuff like baking or cottagecore.. idk if its partly for flexibility or because i cant imagine them#making it their whole personality. not bc i find it cringe or overblown but more like ive learned to associate design with character depth#i had a cutesy uwu persona for most of highschool because i thought it would make me more. likeable? easy to remember? since#memorable character designs are easy to recognize. and one way of doing that is simplifying it with a theme or symbol so you form an#association. but since im a real person its exhausting keeping up that appearance all the time and denying myself things when they dont#fit my 'aesthetic' or 'theme.' i think ive grown past that bc i just collect stuff because i think it looks cool and dont let myself dwell#on how it might 'fit' with my image. but i cant help feeling bad doing it to my own characters bc it feels like im making them too one#dimensional. despite knowing that theyre not real and design alone doesnt reflect depth i cant help feeling like its wrong#despite that i love seeing motifs because it feels like it reflects the characters soul and paradoxically gives them depth. it makes them#interesting to look at too and honestly its pretty fun combining things that fall under a similar category when designing#i struggle find a balance between those two things#actually this reminds me of noelles christmas theme.. i dont remember her saying anything abt liking christmas despite a lot of#her design and character tying back to it. it makes me wonder if she would have feelings about that or doesnt think abt it too hard#or if its like a matching family shirts situation and shes just going along with it??#maybe i should just do whatever i want with my character designs since theyre not real and im thinking abt it too hard#although. this probably has something to do with deep seated identity issues huh#yapping#oc talk#oc
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Sam: "Look at me. Hey- look at me a second. I know. I know you're tough. I know how strong you are. You have every right to be proud of that. But being able to handle somethin' doesn't mean you should have to. Least of all when I'm right here trying to help. Please let me help. If not for you then for me, because I don't like knowin' you're hurtin', especially when there's somethin' I can do about it."
Me, shaking my head, fighting back literal tears: "B-but it's gonna give you another headache!"
#redacted sam#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redactedverse#redacted fandom#[Sam's name doubles as a link to the specific lines i quoted btw. just for full credit/transparency & for anyone who wants to (re)listen]#Sam's deep-seated need to heal vs my inability to accept help would be a battle for the ages. unstoppable force vs immovable object#wait Sam already mentioned the force vs object thing to David during the inversion didn't he lmao 'they call /me/ Immovable Object'#he does suit Immovable a little more than Unstoppable i guess. i mean he can def be both imo but ykwim. anyways i digress#listen. i'm not a Marriage kinda guy. but good god the way some of Sam's lines make me wanna take a fucking knee and propose#i'm love him ur honor. he is comfort incarnate#can't believe i waited so long to listen to the Valentines Vampire Attack audio. it's got so much of that sweet sweet hurt/comfort#very reminiscent of their 2nd audio given all the healing he does for them & the consent checks before moving clothing and whatnot#which makes it a top favorite for me bc that's probably my most replayed Sam audio. and the one that initially hooked me#i didn't put off listening to it bc i thought i Wouldn't like it btw i just procrastinate everything for no real reason#listening to it now tho actually worked out well bc i could uh. definitely use it. so maybe i was subconsciously saving it for hard times#this post isn't a joke btw it really does hurt to hear him put himself in pain for the sake of healing Darlin' :(((#anD PAINKILLERS DON'T EVEN WORK ON HIM!!! ough man i would struggle so hard to accept his healing if i were in Darlin's shoes#like yeah there's other reasons i'd struggle to accept it too but him being in pain as a result would be one of 'em. the Guilt bro i can't#rp audio stuff#Seven.txt#(Seven blorbo-posting at 2am when they should either be doing something productive or sleeping?? more likely than you might think)
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Hi Salome!!! Hope youâre doing good and healing well â¤ď¸ I have a question: how old is Konig in DOG? (Also thank you for writing this deranged, sexy creep I love him so much I want to kiss him on the forehead and put him in my pocket)
Aww ty! đĽ°đ I was originally supposed to keep DOG KĂśnig's age undefined but because there's a birthday scene at the end of this fic it sort of has to be disclosed ^^
So our doggy is currently 36 and will turn 37 in a few months đś He's a summer child!
#not that old for a dog#but very old for a dog unloved :'(#i'm glad he now has a shelter and a good loving home ^^#none of you asked but I'm thinking about a Leo Sun with maybe Pisces moon and Scorpio rising in his chart#perhaps his Mars is in Aries and his Chiron is in Cancer...#guy has some deep seated issues with self love also mom was never quite there for him#yes i do an astrological chart for most of the characters i write it actually helps with characterization a bunch!#has nothing to do with *actual* astrology but wth! it's a good proven method to brainstorm some placements#dog fic#stalker!kĂśnig
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Iâm sorry but the flat way that the fandom tackles the Enji Todoroki problem is so blegh. Yes, how he treated them (especially Shoutoâwe donât 100% know if Touyaâs training was the same, especially because he actually liked his training) was wrong, the way he treated his wife was wrong, the way he ignored his other kids is wrong. HOWEVER, him cutting Touya off from training was NOT 100% wrong. Should he have treated it more delicately? Yes. Should he have been more considerate to his kid? Yes. Should he have gotten him some kind of therapy to help him cope with his obvious mental issues? Also yes. But cutting him off from training when he gets hurt doing so and itâs unavoidable is NOT wrong. He was trying to prevent exactly what happened in the end. Maybe he could have revisited it a few years later when training isnât all Touya is and looked into support items, idk, but Enjiâs approach was the right decision in the wrong way.
#really Touya had some mental issues that couldnât have just been from enji#because looking at it he wasnât as bad on screen to Touya as he was to shouto#I feel like no one talks about that#shoutoâs trauma kinda gets overlooked because he was strong enough to overcome it#but it was still there and erasing it erases his whole character arc#and really in the end touya did bad things. he became a villain. he killed people#despite the whole âtouya died dabi was bornâ thing they had going on (which was NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY#ITS A LITERARY ELEMENT THAT EXPRESSES FIGURATIVE REBIRTH) people in this fandom oh so love to disconnect touya from dabi#they are the SAME PERSON#touya tried to KILL shouto when he was a baby#he has had VERY deep-seated issues for a very long time#and honestly I think he was born with it#and the environment he grew up in made it worse#thatâs just my two cents tho#shouto todoroki#touya todoroki#dabi todoroki#dabi#mha dabi#mha#bnha#enji todoroki#todoroki#todoroki family
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It's so niche... SO NICHE
But I can't stop thinking about fae slave whumpee being given to royalty... and the queen just adores him... caretaker x whumpee shit
But! She can't have an official relationship with FAE are you KIDDING
you can't have a half fae HEIR to the THRONE.
so... she never marries, but gets a (human) sperm donor. Whumpee holds her hand through the labor, and none of the midwives say a damn thing
And Whumpee is the baby's nanny. It just seemed right to the both of them.
I'm just picturing so many cute and heartbreaking scenes:
"papa-"
"I'm not your papa little miss. it's not allowed"
"why is that thing keeping after the princess"
"he's a loyal slave and her majesty enjoys him so shut up before the princess/queen hears you!"
Whumpee running after a little toddler while the court watches this otherworldly and meek/shy guy curse in a strange language: "by stars how is she so fast"
Whumpee gets backhanded by an irritable noble, and the eight year old princess asks why he's crying/sees it and immediately tattles that lord-so-and-so hit him. her mother is FURIOUS
The princess gets threatened and oh boY WHUMPEE IS NOT MEEK NOW, snarling and baring his teeth (you know what that is? growth)
"You might not be my blood father. But you raised me, Papa. And the nobles can fucking deal with it"
Edit: I did it
#I KNOW I KNOW#its SO NICHE#but I LOVE IT#listen LISTEN#its got everything#secret relationship? yes#political nonsense? check#toddler shenanigans? absolutely#deep seated fear and trauma? mhm#and think of the whispered bigotry!#whump#slavery whump#fae whumpee#ill get around to this eventually#whumpee x caretaker
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Once again thinking about how every single one of Lokiâs emotional problems stems from his abandonment and rejection issues, which originated from him being rejected and abandoned as an infant.
#like literally. all of them.#his trust issues. his insecurity issues. his desperation to prove himself. his feeling of having no place and no purpose. his jealousy.#every single emotional problem he has ultimately can be traced back to deep seated feelings of rejection and abandonment#and the first and most scarring abandonment he ever had was when his bio father left him to die#like even though he doesnât consciously remember it#it definitely screwed him up for life#i just love that all of his angst over all of the projects heâs been in can be traced back to the 1 thing marvel doesnât wanna talk about#his adoption/heritage#itâs so tragically poetic#and this exactly why it needs to be brought up way more than it is#jotun loki#loki Laufeyson#loki meta#thor 2011#Loki series#Laufey#odin
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