#Death anxiety | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ofthemorningstars · 2 months ago

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To Love What Death Can Touch

TerzOmega ~ Family Fluff ~ Light Angst/Comfort ~ Resurrection AU

2.6k words

AO3 Version

"He’d always hated seeing his lover ill, but after having to live without him, live with the knowledge that Terzo was dead and, at the time, gone forever… Omega had never been the same. He suspected that he never would be."

Terzo is sick, and it's up to Omega and their oldest daughter, Starlight, to nurse him back to health.

CW: death anxiety

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“Shh, shh, it’s ok, little Star,” Omega soothed his and Terzo’s oldest daughter, situating her on his hip and smoothing her hair. She grabbed desperately at her father’s shirt, claws beginning to poke through the fabric.

“But Daddy, Papa is dying!” Starlight wailed, loud enough that Omega began to worry about her waking her younger sister from her nap.

“Baby girl, you’re going to wake Astrid up. You know how hard it is to get her to fall asleep,” Omega gently chided. Starlight grabbed at her tail, beginning to hyperventilate.

“But–”

“Papa isn’t dying, I promise. He’s just sick.” He paused for a moment, wondering how best to explain the concept of human illness to a 4 year old ghoul. He considered them lucky that they hadn’t been forced to have this conversation before now. “You know Papa is… different from us, in some ways. Sometimes humans give each other germs, and they just… don’t feel very good. It will take a few days, but Papa will feel better soon and be completely back to normal. You have my word. ” He emphasized his point with a kiss to the top of Starlight’s head. It took a couple of minutes for Starlight’s breathing to return to normal, and when it did, she took a big, shuddering sigh and leaned her head against Omega’s chest. Omega rubbed her back all the while.

“P–promise?” Starlight stuttered, hiccuping. Omega smiled softly at the sweetness of her concern.

“I promise,” Omega swore to his firstborn. He was hellbent on keeping his word; he would be damned if he let anything happen to his husband. “Do you want to help him feel better faster?” Omega asked as he wiped the lingering tears from Starlight’s face. She nodded quickly. “Well then, go wash your hands,” he instructed, setting her down on her feet.

She did as she was told without question, ever the obedient child. When she returned to his side a few moments later, he ruffled her hair before sitting her on the counter. He already had his materials gathered.

“We’re going to make Papa some chicken soup. It helps humans feel better when they get sick.” He had been simmering a pot of chicken stock for several hours now, ever since Terzo woke up with a fever. Well, ever since Omega noticed early that morning that Terzo felt hot and had woken him up to take his temperature. It was over one hundred and one degrees, to Omega’s horror, so he had been giving Terzo fever reducers on a strict schedule all day. It wasn’t helping nearly as much as Omega was hoping it would.

“Ok!” Starlight said brightly, walking off to the sitting room. Omega peered around the corner as she settled into the sofa and started her movie back up from where she’d left it, checking in on her. He tended to the soup, his mind racing darkly with a hundred different equally terrible scenarios. This happened every time Terzo got sick, but no matter how many times they came through the other side unscathed, it never ceased to emotionally wreck Omega. He’d always hated seeing his lover ill, but after having to live without him, live with the knowledge that Terzo was dead and, at the time, gone forever… Omega had never been the same. He suspected that he never would be.

Omega dreaded days like these. He was very protective of his mate, and he took great pride in keeping Terzo healthy. It had taken a long time before Omega overcame his paralyzing fear about death once again taking Terzo from him after he had been resurrected, and every time Terzo fell ill, it was a cruel reminder of his lingering mortality. That reminder was made all the more cruel by having children at stake now—children who needed their Papa.

“Daddy…” Starlight hesitated, looking like she was trying to find the right words for what she was about to say. “How come Papa isn’t like us, and can get sick? Why isn’t he a ghoul?” Her eyes were wide, innocent. Omegas was taken aback at the question, though he knew she meant nothing malicious by it. He felt a bittersweet pang deep in his chest.

“Because he’s who Daddy fell in love with. We love him all the same, don’t we?” Omega asked softly. Starlight nodded, sniffling and wiping at her nose with the back of her hand. “I wouldn’t have you or your sister without Papa. He’s perfect just the way he is, and we have to remember that not everyone is exactly the same. It’s important to accept people the way they are. Ok, princess?” She nodded again. Omega took her face in his hands, kissing her nose. A nose that looked so much like her Papa’s. He sighed. He had to get Terzo through this.

Omega let Starlight watch as he cut the vegetables: carrots, onions, celery, parsnips, leeks. He helped his daughter carefully pour them into the pot, stirring the wooden spoon together. When they added aromatic turmeric and garlic and fresh sage, Starlight began to sniff, licking her lips.

“Can I have some too, Daddy?” Starlight asked, much to Omega’s amusement.

“Of course you can! Did you really think I wouldn’t feed you?” Omega chuckled, taking her down from her place on the counter. “It’ll be ready soon. We’ll eat lunch, and then we’ll go feed Papa in bed. We don’t want to make him get up. He needs his rest in order to get better.”

“ Me too, Star”, he thought.

“Lunch is ready,” Omega called when everything was done, placing a hand on his daughter’s shoulder. She leaned her head against his arm before hopping to her feet and following him to the table, where a bowl was already waiting for her. She hurriedly dug in, speeding through her meal. When Omega reminded her to slow down, she looked up at him with pleading eyes.

“I want Papa to get lunch, too.” Starlight’s voice was wobbly, unsteady, like she was on the verge of breaking down into tears again. “I just want him to feel better already...” Omega’s heart broke.

“Papa is sleeping, there’s no need to rush. We’ll have to wake him up. You can take your time,” Omega advised, working hard to protect his daughter from his own anxiety. She nodded, slowing down. After she finished her bowl, Omega helped her prepare a tray for Terzo, having her select which hunk of bread to bring her father and assisting her in pouring a glass of orange juice. When it was time, he carried it to their bedroom, Starlight holding onto his pant leg.

As the door swung open, Starlight tentatively poked her head out from behind Omega, taking a peek at where Terzo was currently propped up in bed on a mountain of pillows. Terzo’s face was pale and covered in a light sheen of sweat, his nose red. His eyes were rimmed with dark circles, still firmly shut. Omega heard Starlight let out a quiet gasp behind him.

“Could you wake Papa up for me, sweetie? My hands are a little full.” Omega hoped that his tone of voice left room for his daughter to say no if she were uncomfortable or afraid, even if he wished that she would never fear her Papa. Starlight stepped out slightly in front of Omega, looking to him for reassurance. Omega simply nodded at her, looking between her and his sleeping husband.

“You’re so warm, Papa,” Starlight sounded scared, like she was on the verge of tears. Terzo’s brow furrowed, and he opened his mouth, but Omega spoke up before Terzo could get anything out.

She appeared to steel herself and then nodded, creeping towards the bedside. Carefully climbing onto the bed, she did her best not to jostle Terzo. As she reached where he was resting she reached out, pausing only for a moment before placing a hand on Terzo’s shoulder and softly shaking him.

“P-Papa?” Starlight stuttered, a slight tremor in her voice. “Papa, w-we brought you some soup.” Terzo began to stir, groaning softly and moving to shield his eyes against the bright afternoon sunlight pouring in through the curtains. When his eyes fluttered open, they were bleary and unfocused, flitting around the room for a moment before finally settling on his daughter’s face. Omega could see Terzo’s gaze sharpen when he started to process what he was seeing, taking in her look of upset and concern. Terzo reached out with a trembling hand to cup Starlight’s face, and she leaned into his touch, grabbing onto his arm with both hands.

“He’s alright, Star, he just has a fever. It’s a way that human bodies heal themselves. Papa’s body is trying to get rid of the germs.” Omega silently wondered how much of that explanation was him trying to reassure himself. Starlight looked back at Omega, her eyes full of uncertainty. As she turned back around, Terzo nodded at her, reinforcing what Omega had said.

“Sì,” Terzo croaked out hoarsely, having to stop to clear his throat. He took her hand, lifting it to his mouth and kissing the back of it. “Papa is ok. Just a bit under the weather.” As he appeared to notice what Omega was carrying, a small smile brightened his pallid features. “What have you brought me, my darlings?”

“You’re doing great, la mia dolce bambina.” Terzo reached up to brush a strand of hair out of Starlight’s face. Omega started to speak up about the mess again, but Terzo only had eyes for their daughter. “It is ok, amore, let her help. She is doing such a good job.” Omega sighed, going to get a towel. “This is very good soup, you did an excellent job, la mia piccola stella,” he overheard Terzo say from down the hall, and Omega couldn’t help but smile despite his lingering anxiety.

“Daddy made you chicken soup!” Starlight bounced excitedly, her mood immediately lifting at the reminder. “He said it would make you feel better!” Terzo chuckled, ruffling her hair.

“Hey, you helped too, Star!” Omega said playfully, trying to encourage the mood in the room to continue to lift. The corners of Terzo’s eyes crinkled as his smile widened.

“Did you, now?” Terzo made a show of sniffing the air. “It smells delicious. I feel better already.” When he weakly tried to sit up, Omega hastily sat the tray down on the nightstand so he could help his husband, not wanting him to strain himself. “Grazie, amore mio,” Terzo said as Omega assisted him, gratitude evident on his face. After Omega rearranged the pillows to help support Terzo’s back, he carefully sat the tray over his lap and gingerly settled down on the bed beside Terzo.

Starlight picked up the spoon and tried her best to feed Terzo, but she ended up making a bit of a mess on her way to his mouth, spilling soup on the tray and Terzo’s shirt. Omega inhaled sharply, his hand shooting out to catch the spoon as it returned to the bowl.

“Star–!” Omega began to caution as he started to take the spoon from her, but Terzo shot him a look.

After Terzo ate all that he could, Starlight gave him a big kiss on the cheek and hurried out of the room. Omega was puzzled by her sudden departure, but Terzo didn’t seem bothered. He ran a hand up and down Omega’s arm knowingly, humming softly, and Omega closed his eyes as they welled up, trying to stop the dam from breaking. When Omega’s breath hitched, Terzo shushed him, taking his hand and smoothing over the back of it with his thumb.

“Hey, hey,” Terzo soothed. “I’m ok. Everything is going to be ok.” With no small amount of effort, he leaned up, placing a kiss on Omega’s shoulder. Omega met his eyes, unable to stop the tear that spilled over when he felt the waves of love radiating off of Terzo with his quintessence. Another tear escaped as their lips met in a tender kiss, this one wiped away by the pad of his husband’s thumb. Omega couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him in a huff.

“I thought I was supposed to be the one making you feel better,” Omega joked as he pulled away, kissing Terzo on the forehead. Terzo squeezed his hand, his eyes soft. Terzo didn’t have to say anything. Omega knew. He knew that Terzo was aware of the inner turmoil he was experiencing. Omega was just about to open his mouth again when he heard the pitter-patter of footsteps running down the hallway.

Once she had gotten her fill and began refusing to eat, Omega sighed and picked her up, holding her close and breathing in her scent, closing his eyes as he tried to remain in the moment. The anxiety and the fear of losing his family that he worked so hard to fight off on a daily basis was rearing its ugly head, and he needed an anchor.

Star burst into the room but slowed as she reached the bed. Approaching Terzo with care, she snuggled up into his side and pulled out a book that Omega hadn’t noticed tucked under her arm. It was her favorite, a book titled “Guess How Much I Love You”, one that her fathers read to her every night. Omega knew that she couldn’t quite read fluently yet, and instead had the book memorized from years of bedtimes. As he watched their daughter read to her Papa, Terzo’s lips pressed to the crown of her head and his arm wrapped tightly around her, he felt his heart full to bursting with gratitude and love for his family, tears once again threatening to spill over.

Suddenly they heard Astrid’s cries from the girls’ room, and Starlight’s recitation faltered. He saw Terzo instinctively move to get up and placed a hand on his leg, shaking his head firmly.

“Stay. You need your rest. I’ve got her, don’t worry.” His tone left no room for argument. Terzo grimaced but nodded, relaxing back into his pillows once more. Omega tended to the cranky one year old, after about 10 minutes realizing that unfortunately, naptime was over. He fed Astrid lunch, feeling a little guilty for letting her sleep through lunchtime, but her sleep schedule was still so erratic even after the year mark that they’d taken to letting her sleep whenever it found her.

Omega headed back to their room, needing to see everyone he loved, to get visual confirmation that they were alright. When he rounded the corner, though, he was surprised to see Terzo and Starlight both asleep together, the little ghoul tucked into the crook of his arm. He couldn’t fight the smile that overtook his face, his knees feeling weak as he was overcome by an intense wave of love. To his surprise, Astrid began to rub her eyes, whining as she reached for Terzo.

“Papa,” she called softly, Omega’s smile widening. “Daddy” was her first word, but “Papa” had been a close second following very shortly after, and she’d never stopped saying either since. She was still learning “Star”, but Omega had no doubts she’d get it soon. Astrid opened and closed her fists, grasping at the air. He gave her what she wanted, situating her on Terzo’s other side. She moved closer, clutching his shirt and sucking her thumb. As her breathing began to slow and her heavy eyelids fell closed, Omega kissed them on their foreheads, unable to hold himself back. He got into the bed himself, one of his long arms resting protectively on all three of them. He drifted off with the knowledge that they would get through this, together.

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