#DUMBEST thing ive ever created

[ver0nica985]

this is the dumbest thing ive ever made

og meme under the cut 😭

[angered-box]

i fucking hate america.

[ellecdc]

okay so I just wanted to start by saying I love you're moonwater stories so much.

Ive been thinking about this like paring ig for a bit and your recent moonwater story when r gets home from girls night just made me think of it more so if you're interested id love for you to do it.

Basically its like poly moonwater plus Barty ive been calling it moonwaterkiller in my head (idk if its already a ship or already has a name but I haven't been able to find anything) but basically I feel like r and Barty would be like a chaotic duo and reg and rem would just be like wtf a lot idk... I just think it has some potential and I just love your writing so fucking much.

(I also just love how you write Barty)

so if you're interested I think it would be cool

much love :)

I love the way your mind works babes. thanks for your request! (it's almost two am where I am so please forgive any awkward sentences or spelling mistakes). also, if I didn't completely lose everyone with my DeathStar fics - this may very well do it. && this was written with the help of our fabulous @unstablereader

poly!moonwater x chaotic fem!reader + Barty Crouch Junior

Regulus didn’t know whether to be concerned or slightly aroused at the slightly deranged way that Remus was stalking the halls in search of you and Barty. 

You and Regulus had both at one point or another been in a friends-with-benefits situation with Barty (albeit separately) during your time in school, before you and Regulus went and fell in love with a Gryffindor. 

Regulus still wasn’t quite over the humiliation; both of falling in love and falling in love with a Gryffindor.

Of course, you and Regulus both stayed friends with Barty; Regulus mostly because he couldn’t shake him (ignoring the fact that Regulus really was quite fond of his maniacal friend), and you because the two of you really were sort of two sides of the same hyperactive galleon. 

And though Remus (and sometimes Regulus) liked to pretend that yours and Barty’s friendship caused them grief, they couldn’t deny how much they valued Barty’s loyalty and devotion to his friends; specifically you. 

Regulus’ new favourite thing was easily Remus’ new found appreciation for Barty. 

Up until this point, Barty had been his notoriously flirty and salacious self when it came to the likes of Remus, who wasn’t yet accustomed to Barty’s unique…personality.

However, once Remus realised the history between his two partners and the other Slytherin boy, he quickly came to appreciate the kind of pull Barty could have on people.

So, Remus had started flirting back.

Barty hated it.

Regulus loved it.

You started keeping track of the number of times Remus reduced Barty to a blushing and stuttering mess in your notebook. 

Barty hated that too.

It was nearing curfew and Remus and Regulus hadn’t seen you all afternoon. 

Usually that was fine, considering you were a bit of a free spirit. What was concerning, however, was that they hadn’t seen Barty either.

Regulus watched as Remus checked the stupid map that his brother and their friends had created when his brows furrowed in confusion.

“What? Don’t tell me they’re in the middle of the Black Lake again?” Regulus asked quickly, moving to stand over Remus’ shoulder to peer at the map.

“Again?”

“Don’t ask.” Regulus muttered.

“But…doesn’t Barty not know how to swim?”

“I said don’t ask.”

Seeming to know better, Remus turned back and pointed towards the Ravenclaw common room on the map. “It says they’re up in Ravenclaw tower?”

“For fuck’s sake.” Regulus muttered, dragging a hand over his face.

“How’d two Slytherin’s manage to get into Ravenclaw tower?” Remus asked bemusedly, earning him an unimpressed glare from Regulus. 

“Remus, I love you, but that was perhaps the dumbest question you’ve ever asked me.”

Remus rolled his eyes as he closed the map and tucked it back into his trunk.

“Come on, we might be able to catch up to Pandora on her way up and have her help us in.” 

They had indeed caught up to Pandora, and Pandora had indeed helped them in, though it seemed to be for naught. 

“I thought your stupid map said they were here.” Regulus muttered as he surveyed the common room, unable to spot a single lick of green and silver.

“It’s not stupid and they are in here.” Remus muttered back, moving to stand in the dead centre of the room. 

“How do you know they’re here if you can’t see them?”

Remus glared at Regulus before looking around to ensure no one could hear them. “I can smell them.” He whispered.

Well Regulus just didn’t know what good these wolfy senses were if they were still out two Slytherin’s. 

“Shit.” Regulus heard whispered suddenly as a quill fell from the air and landed beside his foot.

Remus and Regulus both looked up to see you and Barty casually lounging in the chandelier above them.

“Are you sodding kidding me!?” Regulus shouted.

“I think our cover’s been blown.” You said simply to Barty as if you didn’t have two fuming and fretting boyfriends standing nearly forty feet give or take below you.

“Pity.” Barty responded as he peered down. “This was a nice refuge.”

“How’d you even get up there?” Remus cried, pacing like he was getting ready to catch you should you fall.

“Magic.” Barty taunted from above.

“Junior, so help me gods if that witch falls I-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Lupin. I resent the insinuation that I would ever let anything happen to our sweet angel baby.” Barty bit back immediately.

“Okay, okay. Fair enough.” Remus acquiesced as if he were negotiating a hostage situation. “Why don’t you both just come down here, nice and slow, okay?”

Both you and Barty leaned forward to look down at the two boys, causing the chandelier to swing precariously.

“Fucking hells! Stop moving!” Remus shrieked, causing the attention of the few Ravenclaws sitting in the common room to look over.

“Such a worrier.” Barty muttered as he stood and started manoeuvring himself to the edge of the chandelier - you following him over and causing the chandelier to tip to a nearly 90 degree angle. 

“I’m going to be sick, I’m actually going to throw up right here.” Regulus muttered mostly to himself whilst Remus tried to stand directly underneath you lest you need to be caught. 

To Remus and Regulus’ absolute horror, Barty launched himself away from the chandelier, grabbing at the billowy banners hanging from the ceiling causing the chandelier to swing away from him like a pendulum. 

“JUNIOR!” Remus shouted, causing Barty to momentarily look shamefaced as he looked below him. 

As the chandelier swung towards the opposite wall, you too launched yourself at one of the billowy banners hanging from the ceiling and began monkey climbing down them.

“Can you make sure she doesn’t fall, please.” Remus barked at Regulus as he made his way towards Barty.

Barty let out a high pitched screech and began hastily making his way down the wall. “Run Treasure! Save yourself!” He shouted dramatically.

You turned quickly at that and saw Regulus making his way to you.

You let out a surprised squeak and hurried down, and before Regulus realised what you were doing, you had used your wand to open one of the windows and were shimmying out.

“Oi! What the-” but before Regulus could even shove his torso out the window, you’d managed to shift into your animagus form - a mink, which Regulus felt was very fitting considering what a sodding cheeky minx you were being right now - and began scaling your way down the side of the building.

Regulus was interrupted by the sound of a squeal - Remus’ squeal - and turned to see Remus hanging halfway out of the window in much the same fashion that Regulus had been.

Unlike Regulus, however, Remus had been successful in his capture of Barty and had him hanging from the tallest tower at Hogwarts by one of his arms.

“Junior! Are you trying to sodding kill me!?” Remus barked angrily at him, trying to pull Barty up without any help from Barty himself.

Barty looked up at Remus with all the innocence he could muster (read: none) and winked. 

“Catch me if you can, Mr. Wolf.”

And Barty shrunk into his own animagus form - an osprey - and let out a cry before swooping down to pick up something that looked suspiciously like a mink from the eaves of one of the lower towers and took off towards the grounds. 

“Fucking son of a bitch.” Remus cursed as he tried catching his breath, still sitting half out of the Ravenclaw window. “Why do we put up with those two?”

Regulus shrugged with all the nonchalance he could muster. “‘Cause they’re cute?”

Remus sighed and hit his head against the windowsill. “They’re so sodding lucky that they are…”

“Come on.” Regulus said, offering Remus a hand and helping him out of the window. “Unfortunately, I know exactly where they went.”

Barty loved nothing more than the feeling of his feet sinking into the sediment of the Black Lake below his feet. He also loved the feeling of being near you, his Treasure. He also loved the idea of two handsome men frantically searching for you, and him by proxy.

All this to say, Barty was having a really nice night.

“Junior!”

Barty’s face morphed into a Cheshire cat grin as he turned towards the voice of the man and his boyfriend as they stormed towards the waters edge.

“Well hello, Lupin. How nice of you to join us; care for a dip?”

“Get out of the water.” Regulus drawled in a bored tone.

“Why would I do such a thing? The water’s lovely, I’m in wonderful company, and we’re going to feed the Giant Squid.” He argued.

“Barty.” Remus barked with all the severity he could manage. “You don’t know how to swim.”

Barty scoffed indignantly. “Yeah, well…neither can Reggie!”

“That’s why I’m standing on the shore you absolute bell-end.” Regulus countered quickly.

Remus turned his furious gaze into a bemused one as he took in Regulus. “Do you really not know how to swim either?”

“None of us can!” You shouted from your disturbingly deeper place within the lake as the gentle waves nearly lapped against your skirt.

“Oh, for the love of- you know what? This summer, everyone’s getting swimming lessons.” Remus proclaimed.

“Ou, does that mean I get to see you in your swim trunks, Lupin?” Barty called.

Remus, without missing a beat, started towards Barty, walking into the lake in his shoes and all. “You could see me right now, in less, for free, Junior. You only had to ask.”

Barty let out a screech and tried running towards you, albeit in slow motion on account of the water’s resistance. “Y/N! Treasure! Help! Make him stop!”

“No can do, bubs.” You called back in monotone, still throwing chunks of bread towards the middle of the Lake in hopes of eliciting the company of one Giant Squid. 

“Dove, you’re going to catch a cold; get out of the water.” Remus called to you, pants soaked up to his knees after giving up on chasing Barty in the water.

“We’re trying to make friends!” You whined.

“You cannot make friends with a squid, amour. He will eat you.” Regulus explained from the shore. 

“He wouldn’t eat his friend.” You scoffed. 

“Dove.” Remus barked again.

“I want to see the the big water kitty!” You whined again, turning towards the boys and offering the most pathetic pout you could muster.

Regulus scoffed from his place, still dry on the shore, Remus let out a pained sigh, and Barty all but skipped towards you. 

“A valiant death it will be!” He cheered before he felt the fabric of his jumper being summoned by an accio, dragging him unceremoniously through the water towards Remus.

“No! Ah! AH! STRANGER DANGER. STRANGER DANGER!” He shrieked as Remus threw him over his shoulder.

“Okay, well, now you’re just showing off, Lupin.” He muttered, crossing his arm petulantly as Remus held his free hand out to you.

“Dove, please? Come inside with me?”

You looked distressed at this and moved obediently towards Remus. “Are you mad at me?” You asked timidly.

Barty could actually feel Remus’ body soften beneath him as he allowed some of his tension to dissipate. “Of course not, dovey. I love you.”

You leaned over and pecked a kiss to the corner of his mouth before turning into your animagus mink and swimming to the shore, crawling up Regulus’ pant leg (who admonished you in faux contempt for ruining his trousers), and allowed him to carry you back to the castle. 

Barty was feeling petulant about the whole matter of being chased and chastised so decided then that he was going to force Remus to carry him all the way back to the castle in silence.

Unfortunately for Barty, he hated silence.

He was at least proud he’d made it to the dungeons before giving up on his vow of silence.

“You’re really not upset with her?” Barty asked quietly from his current prison. He could feel Remus’ head tilt in confusion, though his steps never faltered.

“Of course not?” He responded as a question.

“Hmmm.” Barty said, racking his brain for something to upset or fluster this man.

“Oh! What about me having slept with both your boyfriend and your girlfriend?”

“What about it?” Remus asked plainly. 

“Well…aren’t you upset about that?”

Remus scoffed and adjusted his grip on Barty, hand’s migrating none too innocently up the back of his thighs. “Junior. The only thing I’m upset about is that you haven’t slept with all three of us. I don’t like feeling left out, you know?”

Barty made a strangled sound as he struggled in Remus’ grip to no avail, causing you and Regulus to chuckle from a few strides ahead as you all stepped into the Slytherin common room.

“We told you he was smooth, Barty.” You chuckled.

“You should hear him in bed.” Regulus taunted, reaching over to pinch Barty’s arse, causing him to yelp and start cursing at him.

Remus relented and put Barty down, who immediately made for Regulus’ throat.

“Easy, Junior.” Remus chuckled, pulling him back by the shoulder. “You wanna keep Reg around, don’t you?”

Barty harrumphed and crossed his arms indignantly.

“We’d like to keep you around.” Remus continued.

Barty grumbled again and let out a quiet. “Fine.”

Remus beamed at him, which was very alarming if you asked Barty, as they stepped into his and Regulus’ shared dorm; Rosier and Avery were already asleep in their beds with their curtains drawn.

“Yeah? You’ll let us keep you?” Remus asked.

“I said fine, Lupin.” He bit back.

“Great. So we’re in a relationship then.” He explained simply, causing Barty to level him with a severe glare. “How dare you, Lupin. Never say such vile things to me again.” He spat before storming towards the boy’s bathroom.

Regulus groaned and grabbed his own toiletries before making his way to the washroom behind him. “I’ll go make sure he doesn’t try to drown himself in the shower again.”

Remus shook his head and changed into his pyjamas before climbing into Regulus’ bed and pulling you towards him.

“So, explain this to me, Dove. Why is Barty the way he is?”

You snorted a laugh and turned to face him. “You’re going to have to be way more specific, love.”

Remus chuckled and ran his hands up and down your back. “He likes Reg. He loves you. He seems sweet on me. We invite him to be ours and he accepts - but runs when we make it mean something?”

You smiled up at your boyfriend and booped his nose with a perfectly manicured finger - which Remus found very confusing considering you spend your spare time scaling the rafters of grand ceilings and enticing Giant Squids from their hiding places. “Barty doesn’t understand, Rem. He wouldn’t know love if it punched him right in the face.”

Remus could feel his brows furrow and he pulled you in tighter to his chest. “Dove…love doesn’t punch you in the face?”

Apparently that had been the wrong thing to say as you rolled your eyes in exasperation and threw your head back onto the pillow. “You see? That’s the kind of thing someone who grew up loved would know.”

It’s not that Remus ever really forgot to worry about you per se, but he sometimes really worried about you Purebloods. 

At some point in the night, you had apparently decided Remus and Regulus’ bed was too hot and moved to Barty’s. Remus would have been slightly more petulant about the matter if he hadn’t thought you looked absolutely precious with Barty resting his head on your chest.

He looked so innocent in his sleep.

Sleep clearly didn’t know him very well.

Remus was shocked when the four of you entered the Great Hall for breakfast and Barty actually followed you three to the Gryffindor table. Though Remus was trying to play it cool, he couldn’t help but feel a flutter of hope surge within him at what that might mean for the three four of you.

Remus was just about to bite into his toast when a sultry voice sounded from behind Barty.

“Hello, Bartemus.” Amelia Bones sing-songed as she trailed a finger up Barty’s arm.

His brows furrowed almost comically from above the rim of his coffee cup before he slowly lowered it and turned to consider the Hufflepuff.

“Bones. Can I help you?” He asked, punctuating the word help as he plucked her fingers from his being between his two fingers as if he’d found something really quite disgusting on his person.

“I was thinking, you could help me, perhaps tonight?”

Barty turned to look at her incredulously.

“Help with what, Amelia? I’m really quite busy.” He spat, gesturing wildly to his cup of coffee. 

“An orgasm or two? Gods, you’re pissy in the mornings.”

Barty scoffed, sounding completely scandalised as he clutched at non-existent pearls adorning his neck. “I am sitting here with my beloveds, Amelia. For shame. You see this lot? I’m theirs, capiche?” 

Amelia looked bemusedly at the group of you before shaking her head in confusion. “Whatever you say, Junior.”

She moseyed on away, and Barty turned back towards his cup of coffee. “The gall of some people, honestly.” He said in exasperation, downing the rest of his still hot coffee and standing unceremoniously.

“Well, I best be off. Things to fuck up, people to scare. Tah-tah.” He called, pressing a quick kiss to your hair as he left the Great Hall.

Suddenly, realisation dawned on Remus.

“Ah, I see. So no to a relationship, but he is ours.”

You and Regulus chorused a hum of acknowledgement. 

“That’s just how Barty operates. You’ll get used to it.” You explained, still not looking up from the Daily Prophet you had been reading all this time.

Remus didn’t mind getting used to that; not if it meant he managed to get everything he wanted.

[sunshinechay]

The way my mind connects the dots with 0 hesitation is hilarious. I could be seeing something like "Omg Michael is SO hot, looks so good with his hair like that, my little meow meow!" and Im like "ya Michael-

Seater?

Cera??

Myers!

from the group chat??!!!???

Really be like that (I barely care about any of those people, my brain will just pick at random), wild to see this post in the wild tho, its been years since I saw fans of (pick your fighter).

Only to find out OP is talking about a totally unrelated Michael from something I've never heard of, but its too late, ive already connected the dots in such a hilarious way, I gotta reblog now. But im collecting the new Michael for another similar situation if this ever comes up again.

I remember in high school we had this classmate named John Oliver and for the life of me, I couldn't understand that my friends were talking about John Oliver the tv host. They'd sit there saying the wildest shit like "Did you hear what insane shit John Oliver did last week?" and for a whole 5 seconds I'd be SO concerned about our mutual classmate only to be told this is about some random dude I don't know or watch (back then) and suddenly the world made a LOT more sense. But for those 5 seconds my mind created real terror and I just had to know what kind of sitcom life my classmate was living every fucking week.

So anyways, if you're always wondering why i keep re-blogging posts about your favs with the dumbest tags, its because I keep re-living Last Week with John Oliver time loop with you😭.

I don't even read your url, im just scrolling fast and every time im like "wait Effy slow down, this made no sense, dont just accept that" I look at the url and you're talking about some whole other guy.

Like I really saw your post and went "ah the creepy pasta girlies from 2012 breached containment and hit my dash again...ya...i'll reblog" and it was literally NOT about that Jeff at all.

I need an option to highlight your username in big and bold so my brain understands that your favs and my brain has 0 overlap and idk any of those people. This keeps happening with just you on my dash and no one else. I remembering struggling with my life, during your vegas era (of vegaspete of kinnporshe). Like this is NOT about Las Vegas at all, but if you asked me what my brain ran off with in those 5 seconds, if left unchecked, you'd understand why I love having you in my dash so much. Scrolling super fast on tumblr with you on my dash is just briefly time traveling to another universe istg.

Plus sometimes I do end up watching what you watch like kinnporshe so thats just a bonus.

Glad I could help! Haha

And don’t worry, my brain frequently does this kind of thing as well. Our brains recognize patterns and make connection only it seems our make connections where there are none, but that’s half the fun. Sometimes I laugh at where my own brain takes me.

I saw your tags on the Jeff posts and laughed because omg can you imagine Jeff the Killer reading his own fanfiction 😂😂😂

However, it’s Jeff Satur we’re talking about and honestly the fact he has read fanfiction about himself is both funny and horrifying like “I’m so sorry you had to witness this Jeff…would like some recs for other fics about you?” 😂😂😂

I’m glad that you have liked the BLs you’ve watched. They’re really just something else, in both good ways and bad and I love them so much. So I’m happy I can spread the joy :)

[mojaves]

tagged by @nuclearstorms @aartyom @faarkas and @cultistbase to do this tag game for some ocs!

not doing the picrew bc i can't make them all in it and it will make me insane but here it is for anyone else who wants to give it a try!!

FAVOURITE OC

SEBASTIAN VIDAL | 2077

it was a tie between him and alex. but i decided not to give alex special treatment bc otherwise he would be on here twice. anyway this isnt about him. this is about seb. the saddest wettest beast of an oc i think ive ever created. he can fit so much lore in him. he has the worst life. his now boyfriend once tried to kill him no less than 20ish times. his ex wife also tried to kill him. everyone is trying to kill him and he's just out here big silly and gay about it. AND he has great boobs. whats not to love. theyre so big bc theyre so full of the love he has for his friends and family. and im obsessed with him

NEWEST OC

VEGA | 2077

they are a bartender at a club. they have black and green hair. they love short guys and fast cars. theyre a menace. they were a merc once. they can down a whole can of beer in under 10 seconds. you want to he their friend so bad.

OLDEST OC

ALEX SHEPHERD | N/A

literally THE guy of all time who is SOSOSOSOSO important to me. he's gone through so many changes, appearance wise, story wise, even names. he is an amalgamation of so many old dead ocs i didnt know what to do with. he is THE babygirl of the moment and the moment is forever. he has existed in some form for 10??? years now. he CANNOT stay dead and it really shows in both his story and how many iterations he went through to get to this point. tall bastard man who im in love with actually.

MEANEST OC

RUTHIE O'CONNELL | N/A

she's a girlboss but also a horrible person. she tried to kill her husband [after she died. ghost revenge] and eventually succeeded. and then tormented his great[?] nephew, alex. for so many years. until HE also died. bc of her. and now his [not] life is in complete and utter shambles. 0 remorse she just saw this baby and was like ok now how can i torment him psychologically for the next 22 years of his life. and then did it. and for what. girl thats a wholeass fresh baked infant why are you haunting him. go somewhere else.

SOFTEST OC

NOAH TALAVERA | 2077

he is just a little guy who is SO full of love despite the horrors. so gentle with literally everything he touches. the city could have completely changed and ruined him. he could have become angry. he could have become a merc to get money. and fall into that pit like so many others did. but he didnt!!! he didnt let that happen!!!! yes the city may have hurt him and left him with cyberware he never wanted but it will NEVER stop him from being kind. ever. and i love him so much for it.

MOST ALOOF/STANDOFFISH OC

XAVIER MASON | 2077

he is an arasaka plaything whose whole personality has been completely altered bc of it. he used to be welcoming and friendly and Kind. but bc of literally everything arasaka did to him, he's extremely cold and distant, and a bit of an asshole. he is well aware of this, and there is a little voice in him somewhere. begging for him to be kind again. just once. because while he won't ever admit it, he doesnt want to die believing everyone thought he was nothing more than an arasaka bootlicker and an all around shitty guy. he's a loving father, deep down in there somewhere, he just cant show it. and he doesnt know how </3 he'll figure it out again. one day

DUMBEST OC

LUCIANO VIDAL | 2077

it's funny bc he is actually really smart, his brain is a sponge when it comes to learning new things, he is a great listener, and will remember basically everything you ever tell him. however!!! when he started his job as a security guard at a club, he somehow didnt notice his own brother was also there working occasionally. for a whole entire month. [theyre both idiots there sorry seb] but then after that. he also failed to mention to his two sisters that he finally got in contact with his brother again after almost 20 years. it took. ???? a good handful of months for anyone to find out. and it was entirely by accident.

he's very stupid and his idea of what is and isnt important is Very skewed. but i still love him.

SMARTEST OC

LEON DELLO RUSSO | 2077

he designed his own cyberarm. the fingers are full of different sized screwdrivers for different emergencies. he once plotted out the floorplan of an entire spaceship by memory and sheer luck. he is very good at repairing things. he is a cybersecurity expert. he almost got killed for hacking into the wrong systems at work once. he contains multitudes.

OC I'D BE FRIENDS WITH IRL

MARCUS/RYAN/VAL | N/A

yes theres three of them theyre a package deal. marcus sees ghosts. ryan is a wandering soul trying to find her body back. val can read your fortune with eerie accuracy. if the three of them were my friends my life would never be boring ever again

[sentient-snail]

i think i just created the dumbest thing ive ever written

[brightlordbrooding-eyes]

Flag discourse is the dumbest thing ever “the person who created this flag supports mspec lesbians.” Ok and? Good for them. Who gives a fuck. It’s a flag. So what if they support mspec lesbians? Ive gone to a wrestling meet before. Do I understand it at all? Not really. Do I think it’s kinda gross? Yeah. But is it going to matter in 5 years that on this date I went and watched wrestling? No! Does some strangers identity matter to you in your daily life? No. Get over jt.

[panicataphmausinsanity]

oh for sure!!! i dont really plan to continue mcd s3. especially after aaron died, i just feel like things are about to go downhill for probably the dumbest reasons ever seeing as the causes of aaron's death and the aftermath of it was extremely disappointing. i think after season 2 started jess really turned the series into a self insert/indulgence fanfic kinda thing rather than an actual let's play show she created for her fans. plus ive heard that jessica herself didnt like mcd 3 and the way it turned out, so gosh i am not planning to watch that shit show if she herself is annoyed at how it came out to be.

shit, sorry for the lil rant ;(

plssssss more aarmau / aaron head canons i will eat em UP

Hmmm I have one I thought up a few months ago but it might be a bit meta.

So basically you know how Aaron doesn't have a personality at all in both nystreet and MCD? I think it's pretty obvious that the fact he has no defining characteristics or traits besides being a former lord and him hating Zane is obviously the fault of Jess and Jason, not Aaron's. But I do think this is interesting from a limitation perspective.

See, I don't like completely rebooting a story concept, I like to work with the limitations of the original source material to create depth, not something brand new. I've been doing the same for Zane as well, though we can talk about-face him another time. I like to use the peices that are already there in a story and add everything else around it. Sure, I will do canon divergences here and there, but if I can use something in the original canon and keep certain events as close as possible, I will.

So, Aaron's severe lack of personality. It's obviously because of bad writing. But what if it wasn't?

Shad is a very interesting character. Mostly because we don't get the exact details of WHY, exactly, he turned out so... Twisted.

Like as a creature itself, Shad is weird. He used to be a good person. I genuinely believe that Shad was never evil, just assigned a set of abilities he couldn't really handle. He kind of reminds me of Chat Noir because of the way he and Irene's magical dynamics are so similar to Marinette and Adrian's. Irene was the light, and Shad was the darkness.

Now, sure, we have the absolute shit-show that was MCD season 3 and Mystreet season 6, and the ensuing retcon that has Irene kind of be a terrible person? Which, I have a headcanon about that retconed version of the story that I might write and post on AO3 one day, but for the sake of my sanity I consider the original story of Shad's betrayal canon. The other male members were in love with Irene and stabbed Shad in the back.

Thinking about it, though, where was Irene in all of this?

What, exactly, made Shad into the Shadow Lord? Irene would have reasonex with him. If Shad had come out of the altercation alive, he could have been reasoned with. Yes, maybe Irene's communications skills were lacking due to centuries of immortality and maybe she caused a misunderstanding that led him to the dark side, but Shad was not a BAD person. Temperamental, traumatized, tired and emotionally disregulated, sure. But he was not a bad person.

That's if we're assuming Shad lived.

I think he didn't.

I think the other male divine warriors killed him.

Of course, Irene would not have been okay with this. And they probably would have had to do it behind her back. Maybe they chose a time they knew she would not be there. Maybe they told Shad Irene agreed with their plans for his death.

But Irene loved Shad. She maybe didn't know how to show it anymore, but she LOVED him. She would have never let him die.

Shad probably didn't know that though.

So he dies. And somehow, Irene finds them. The others try to explain, at first, but it's moot point because for the first time in multiple lifetimes, Irene emotes. She shows an emotion. She feels something.

She tries to heal Shad. She's a healer after all. It's what she does. She tries.

It doesn't work.

She tries again.

It doesn't work.

She tries and she tries and she tries and she tries and--

And Shad comes back.

But it's not right. There's something WRONG. Irene fucked up. Because Shad is dark, and Irene is light, and they're not supposed to MIX.

So Shad comes back as an angry, furious, broken shell, twisted and dark and evil and angry. And they fight him and they win, and Irene locks him away, and the Irene looks around at what her companions have TAKEN from her and she can't STAND it anymore and so she locks herself away and sleeps, because she doesn't feel ANYTHING and she wants to FEEL and--

Anyway, we know this story. So what does this have to do with Aaron?

What if Aaron isn't Shad? What if Aaron is a PEICE of Shad?

Because light and dark aren't supposed to mix, but when they do, they create something unstable. And like any chemical bond that does not want to exist, it explodes. And what did it explode?

Shad.

And what part of Shad did it explode?

His soul, of course.

The heart of darkness. The Shadow Lord. These are PEICES of Shad's soul. He was fractured.

And that's why Aaron has no personality besides things like revenge and being a lord and helping raise Lilith and loving Aphmau and nothing else. He was the peice of Shad that carried Shad's humanity, but NOTHING ELSE. He doesn't have the Shadow Lords Passion and anger and rage. He shows glimpses of it, but only enough any other human would show. That's why he's blank and distant and doesn't emote. His heart is gone, and with it, all the deeper complexities of emotion.

He has no hobbies or interests. He just fights and eats and sleeps and drinks water and functions from a creatures instinct, because he's human, but he has NOTHING ELSE.

He's also probably the only peice out toghether enough to reincarnated. But he's missing things and that's why he's so bleh.

Anyway, yeah, that's my hc for Aaron's lack of character development. And I think it's super interesting that Irene would have fractured Shad without realizing it. She was probably too desperate to bring him back to realize how much damage she was doing.

So yeah! Aaron is a price of a whole and that's why he's WEIRD AF thank you for coming to my TedTalk WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[ders1tes]

just reread Chicka Chicka Boom Boom and uhhh that shit slaps man

[foxstens]

me: i don’t know what a tiktok is

also me: watches nothing but tiktok compilations the entire week

[dat-soldier]

happy bday

have the dumbest thing ive ever created

theyre playing a song for you

amazed and poopshitted

[skully-bones]

im currrently drawing something that will signlehandedly get me a lifetime job at nintendo

[telaraneas]

im still in the process of PROPERLY reading all of Detective Pony because dirk im sorry but i have adhd i cant sit through all of those words at once. its not even that the concepts are too advanced, its just that im p sure he deliberately goes out of his way to be as obtuse and pretentious as he possibly can be (which is pitch perfect characterization sndjej)

ive read it in chunks out of order by skimming and then going back and forth, which is almost definitely cheating but also the only way i can actually digest everything going on here. detective pony is a masterpiece on about 5 different levels, it captures a very specific type of metafiction silly-to-crushingly-serious rabbit hole that i have seen over and over and which i'm struck by and fascinated with each time, even the most shallow and un-self aware of these kinds of works fascinate me (...so yes including stuff like the overbloated disaster mess that are the nostalgia critic movies)

detective pony is just unironically very engaging tho no matter how deep it goes into embarrasing dialectics and struggles with the admission of responsibility about the things you create and about how the entire book IS an extension of his psyche no matter how much he frames it like a struggle against him. the whole thing reads like a microcosm of his whole mental state and especially the fact that as he says. he set out to make a birthday present for jane and ended up just making a whole thing thats about himself and his ego and his struggles with that ego and the terrifying fact that no matter how much he says hes ashamed of it and that no one should read it, he is STILL in the active process of creating it and putting his feelings out there and arguing with himself in the form of socratic dialogue and that, in the end, he DOES end up giving it to jane

and i cant stop thinking about how jane DID READ IT. like i fully 100% believe she read every word

dirk and jane have one of the most interesting relationships in homestuck i think because they honestly care about each other and can be honest with each other in a way they struggle to be with the rest of their friend group, but in a way that's BECAUSE of how emotionally detached they tend to be. like, dirk has his whole mass of issues, but jane's deal is that she tries to be very Nice and conscious of other people's feelings, but because she's, yknow, not a perfect human being, she doesn't ACTUALLY believe everything she says, and she doesn't say most of the things she thinks, because she doesn't want to hurt others and doesn't realize this, too, is a selfish impulse, maybe moreso than actually saying what she feels

i mean. jane was SO committed to only saying what she thought was the most socially nice and appropiate thing to say, that she blew her chance with jake in the dumbest way and then kept digging her hole into the depths of the earth akdnsknd and then she dug in her heels and kept being A Good Friend against her actual wishes until her passiveness turned to passive aggression and then blew up into ACTUAL AGRESSION

I think jane and dirk kind of have similar yet opposite problems in a way, where, like... dirk doesn't want to burden others with his feelings and so tries to hide behind a billion layers of detachment and masks (to the point jake spends the entire story up to entering sburb interacting with dirk without ever actually TALKING to him directly much to his frustration), but despite that stated goal, his feelings and authentic self STILL wind up as the most overtly everpresent fact of the friend group's lives, because moderation just escapes him, so it's like the faucet is at full blast of dirk all over everyone while he stares at it wondering why the fuck he's like this

and then there's jane who is like... she WANTS to connect with others. she WANTS to understand others and be understood in return. she wants to be a good friend and a presence in their lives that they find worthwile. so with her the faucet is closed completely, other than the inescapable droplets that make her support come across as transparently condescending or passive agressive when her heart just isn't in it. jane has SUCH massive trouble expressing her actual, genuine, unironic 100% from the heart Feelings And State Of Mind to other people, and yet she's so miserable when people don't automatically KNOW where she's at

so... i think dirk would write that whole thing, which is esentially a static version of AR in that it's an encapsulation of him that is very much authentically him including the parts of himself he hates the most and never wants anyone else to see, but yet he puts it out into the world ANYWAYS because he can't bring himself to ACTUALLY hide any of himself no matter how much he wants to

and jane would 1000% read the whole thing, from the goofy violent doodly beginnings to the philosophically self-destructive metafictional cathartic end, and she would read it and absorb it and gain a clearer understanding of her friend's issues and what weighs on him, and she would definitely cry while reading it and feel deeply for her friend's situation... and she wouldn't say anything about it

she wouldnt reach out to him like HEY UH ARE YOU OKAY THIS BOOK IS KIND OF UHH CONCERNING, which is ABSOLUTELY what roxy and jake would do... and in my opinion, that's probably WHY dirk went through with it and gave it to her after all that waffling back and forth. because he can't handle honest confrontation about his mental state, but on one level or another, he WANTS to be understood

so like, i think thats why jane and dirk's relationship is so interesting to me. they Understand each other and find comfort in that passive understanding. i think it's also part of why they both went steadily downhill when they... well they never fought over jake, because again these two idiots are too avoidant to have a direct confrontation about it, but they certainly let that whole situation drive a wedge between them which resulted in both of them feeling even more isolated despite roxy's desperate efforts to hold the entire disaster gang together

man.... i just think about the alpha kids a lot........

[hello-yue-here]

Jetko?

YESSSSS.

jetko my beloved.

out of all my atla ships i think these two have the most to overcome in order to be together. Zuko, who although only did these things because he was a misguided and abused kid who didnt know anything other than than the propoganda he was taught, was an imperialist and literally burned down at least one village. he upheld fire nation views all throughout book one and his actions did a lot of harm to the world. so out of all the issues jetko has working against him, fixing his past actions and unlearning propoganda is def at the top of the list. the fire nation hurt jet big time, and thats a HUGE obstacle for them to over come. Jet on the other hand has to work on channelling his outrage towards the fire nation and dealing with his own trauma in a way that doesnt involve... ��harming’ civillians for lack of a better word. he was traumatized and was forced to be an adult and look after a boatload of children way too young. he didnt know any better so its understandable why he did what he did. theyre both teenagers. they are both children. neither of them really knew any better and they both need to learn and overcome these obstacles. and it kind of seems impossible to some people because many people believe that jet was hurt too much by the fire nation to ever forgive zuko and (my least favorite take) jet is racist towards fire nation citizens (FUCK OFF. LITERALLY FUCK OFF ppl who call jet racist piss me off so much. he was oppressed by the fire nation and fought for justice against them. the fire nation were literally oppressing p much everyone in the entire world. racist jet is the DUMBEST take right alongside homophobic katara. i will tolerate none of this jet slander in my blog. i love him alright?)

i got a lil sidetracked. where was i.

RIGHT. ppl who dont like jetko sometimes think that these afformentioned issue would hold them bsck from ever being a good couple and to that i say: haha no.

these two are two of the most stubborn characters in atla. they are the most determined characters and most proactive when it comes to getting what they want. they never give up. and when it comes to eachother? if they wanna be with each other than goddammit they will make it work. i hc them as having a rocky start. maybe being on again off again for a lil bit while theyre still growing and sorting themselves out and finding themselves as people. and yeah zuko being fire nation and jet being hurt by the fire nation is gonna be an issue, but i truly believe that they can overcome it solely based on how passionate and determined they both as as characters.

theyre very similar in the sense that they seek justice and fairness in the world. theyve both been traumatized by the fire nation (granted in very very very different ways) but i think they can grow and heal together.

and i think they can also just be themselves with one another too. when they first met jet bonded with zuko immediately because he could tell he was an outcast and they worked together so fucking well they knew what each other was thinking. they see eachother. and they understand each other.

i think they have such good potential and when written in a well thought out way they are one of the most amazing dynamics.

however. one of the WORST THINGS about the way jetko is written sometimes is the toxic ex jet trope (hello zukka nation i am talking primarily to you because this is where i see it the most because zukka is my top ship but lordy lordy do it got some issues. i love zukka but omg is toxic ex jet a problem here)

jet is not fucking abusive. lets get that straight. just because he fought zuko in ba sing se for (CORRECTLY) assuming he was a firebender (yeah he probs shouldnt have attacked him with swords in a public setting but also: he was traumatized and lied to and hes an impulsive teenage boy. that doesnt excuse the fact that yes jet also did some shitty things but like,,, it explains it. remember kids its good to critique your fav characters and you dont have to agree with me with anything i say this is all just my opinion) jet is not abusive, and using him to write toxic jetko fics or toxic past jetko is not only incredibly insulting to jet and the ship as a whole, but it often is used to reduce zuko to a little uwu-protect-me-im-soft-and-weak-and-cant-fight-for-myself boy. zuko is not that. not at all. ive said it once and i will say it again: the infantilization of zuko as an asian man is a racist take and we need to address it.

if you wanna make jet and zuko have a messy breakup for your fic GO FOR IT. i have no issue with that. but if the only way you can create the messy break up is by making jet an abusive asshole (sometimes even a rapist which WHAT THE FUCK??? why. just. why. what about jet would make you think ‘oh this guys a rapist’ literally goodbye. ppl r weird for that) than maybe you shouldnt be writing past jetko.

sorry for that messy rant oops

back to whag i like about them :) ending on a positive note because they deserve it

i believe that while they would probs have issues as teenagers, i think once they were older and reconnected and like, fully know who they are. they would be GREAT. their communication as seen on the boat was top tier and this would translate so fuckin well into a relationship.

i love jetko and i think jet gets too much hate from the fandom sometimes.

[tai-watanabe-class-1x]

Tiny tai is bf from fnf confirmed

this is the dumbest thing ive ever created

cameo by @buraibanzai and an ant

[dramarising-replacement]

oof ive had a horrid week so im salty AF but  "Someone copied/stole my scry" is officially the dumbest fucking thing i've ever seen a FR user say. Like "ah, yes, my pixel dragon whose genes and apparel are not at all one-of-a-kind (theres a hundred identical dragons on site) has been stolen by X".

are you guys for real? Oh yeAh, how dare someone use the same color/gene/etc dragon or want the same one. It's not like theres not (although a shitton) limited amount of gene/color/apparel combos on this dragon site. These aren't your dragon ocs that you made or designed yourself, these are preset images that belong to a company that made a game where theres a set amount of combinations possible. These dragon pixels dont even actually belong to you! They belong solely to Stormlight. Someone using an identical dragon (even down to eyes/apparel/etc) is NOT 'stealing' lmfao INB4 "but theyre in my lair so theyre my character :( " yeah ok, go try and use one of your dragons in a game or novel (or anything that makes you money) youre creating so i can watch you get sued to hell and back.