#Conflict Resolution Steps

[habilelabs]

Conflict is a part of human interactions. In this blog, we will explore the importance of conflict resolution in the workplace and provide practical strategies.

[zeb-z]

everyday I wish Etoiles had won the election

[snekdood]

ppl who larp about the Revolution™ almost seem to expect someone *else* to take the leading role in it all so they can sit inside on their asses and do jack shit, they know they have no meaningful skills to offer and would only slow people down, but expect to *somehow* magically radicalize most americans into doing all the work for them because awww dey're just such a weak wittle babu that needs to be pwotected and defwended awlways uwu

like. come on. get a grip. if everything went your way and someone actually stronger than you came along to take the lead, you're likely not being invited, and you'll likely be left behind... which means left to the alt right, who will no doubt come to your house to see if you're perpetuating anything "woke", and you gotta know they wont just ask, they'll barge in and look through everything even your computer.

though, you should really focus on your plan. your first step: get along with people enough to even actually convince them its a good idea, and we all know you'll never dare to try that shit. you cant even be on here w/o blocking someone like me for even suggesting you are approaching this like a child playing war and you have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

you think you want a second holocaust (which is essentially letting trump win, i mean hitler got the majority vote in germany. thats how he rose to power. didn't just materialize out of thin air), but you dont seem to grasp the gravity of what that entails, or even that you'd be thrown in the camps with everyone else, all to stick it to jewish ppl and "the libs", even if it means you and all the ones you love die along with them. you are a net negative to humanity and quite frankly should be on a fucking watch list.

[obstinaterixatrix]

well. at least I get to try my hand at threatening people. it’s not something I usually get to do.

[slumbering-shadows]

I wanted to play mh but now I'm just like not in the mood. Too tired mentally. Have y'all ever had to stop 2 queer college kids and 2 full grown conservative men from fighting over a goddamn pixelated dinosaur game. I'm actually going to beat someone up

[kylecorbett]

Motivating Teams for High Performance: Strategies for Business Managers

Motivating Teams for High Performance: Strategies for Business Managers             Motivating Teams for High Performance: Strategies for Business Managers” Introduction: Motivating teams for high performance is a critical responsibility of business managers.   When teams are motivated, they are more productive, innovative, and collaborative, leading to better business outcomes. Motivating books…

[valmepublishing]

Calling all Book Lovers

Review “Mastering the Art of Management” and Build Your Leadership Skills Today! Are you a book lover with a keen interest in management and leadership skills? If so, we want you! Mastering the Art of Management Calling all Book Lovers! Valme Publishing is excited to announce the release of, “Mastering the Art of Management: A Step-by-Step Guide to Building Leadership Skills and Achieving…

Review “Mastering the Art of Management” and Build Your Leadership Skills Today!

Are you a book lover with a keen interest in management and leadership skills? If so, we want you!

Valme Publishing is excited to announce the release of, “Mastering the Art of Management: A Step-by-Step Guide to Building Leadership Skills and Achieving Success as a Manager.” We’re looking for book reviewers who are willing to read and review our book. In exchange for your time and effort, we will provide you with a complimentary PDF version of the book.

“Mastering the Art of Management” is a comprehensive guide for managers at all levels. Whether you’re just starting out in your management career or you’re a seasoned veteran, this book will provide you with practical strategies for building your leadership skills and achieving success as a manager. You’ll learn how to communicate effectively, motivate your team, delegate tasks, handle conflict, and much more.

We’re seeking reviewers who are passionate about management, leadership, and personal development. You should be able to provide an honest, thoughtful review that will help potential readers decide whether this book is right for them.

If you’re interested in becoming a book reviewer for “Mastering the Art of Management,” please send an email to valmeplublishing@gmail.com with the title “Mastering the Art of Management Book Reviewer Request.” We will provide you with more details about the review process and how to access the PDF version of the book.

Thank you for considering this opportunity to help us spread the word about “Mastering the Art of Management”! We look forward to hearing from you soon.

. . . . . . #MasteringTheArtOfManagement #LeadershipSkills #ManagementGuide #PersonalDevelopment #SuccessAsAManager #BookReviewersWanted #ValmePublishing #CareerDevelopment #ProfessionalGrowth #StepByStepGuide #TeamManagement #EffectiveCommunication #Motivation #ConflictResolution #DelegationSkills #CareerSuccess #BookLovers #ReadersCommunity #UnpaidPosition #PDFVersion #RemoteWork #BookReviewing #honestreview #bookrecommendations #bookrelease #bookreview

[esotericalchemist]

𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐠𝐧𝐚 𝐋𝐨𝐫𝐝: 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐲 *°:⋆ₓₒ

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

In Vedic astrology, the ascendant, or rising sign, represents the foundation of your personality and approach to life. Each rising sign is ruled by a specific planet, known as the Lagna Lord, which governs key aspects of your life, including your strengths, challenges, and overall destiny. The placement of this ruling planet in different houses of your chart adds further depth, influencing how you express your unique qualities and navigate various life experiences. In this blog, we will explore how each rising sign and its Lagna Lord shape your journey, and what the placement of the ruling planet reveals about your path in life.

𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, having Aries as your ascendant (Mesha Lagna) gives you a vibrant, fearless, and action-oriented nature. As someone with Aries rising, you are naturally bold, self-reliant, and inclined to take the lead in life. You excel in leadership roles and enjoy starting new projects, often feeling an innate desire to steer the direction of those around you. Mars, your ruling planet, symbolizes drive, bravery, and assertiveness. Mars, your ruling planet, symbolizes drive, bravery, and assertiveness. The house placement of Mars in your chart will play a crucial role in determining how you chase after your goals and overcome obstacles.

Possible Nakshatras:

Ashwini: You act quickly and have a pioneering spirit, with a natural talent for bringing healing or innovative ideas to life. Your enthusiasm is infectious, and you’re known for making fast, decisive choices.

Bharani: You are attuned to life’s cycles of transformation and possess immense inner strength. Freedom is highly valued, and you show great patience and resilience when facing life’s challenges.

Krittika (1st pada): You are sharp, determined, and highly focused. You cut through distractions with ease, always striving for success. You have a strong sense of fairness and an unyielding drive to accomplish your goals.

Mars through the Houses:

Mars in the 1st House: You are naturally assertive, confident, and full of energy. You take charge of situations easily, often stepping into leadership roles with courage and determination.

Mars in the 2nd House: You are highly focused on financial security and work diligently to maintain it. You tend to speak directly and value personal wealth and family assets.

Mars in the 3rd House: A courageous communicator, you’re unafraid to take risks in writing, media, or entrepreneurship. Your relationship with siblings may be competitive, but you tackle challenges head-on.

Mars in the 4th House: Protective of your home and family, you feel deeply connected to your roots. However, emotional intensity can sometimes lead to inner conflict or unease in your domestic life.

Mars in the 5th House: Creative, passionate, and competitive, you thrive in areas like sports, the arts, or speculation. You lead with confidence in activities that demand boldness and self-expression.

Mars in the 6th House: You are fiercely competitive in work and health matters. Challenges don’t faze you, and you may excel in fields related to healthcare, conflict resolution, or service.

Mars in the 7th House: Relationships tend to be intense and dynamic, often attracting strong-willed partners. Conflicts may arise, but they provide opportunities for personal growth.

Mars in the 8th House: Drawn to deep transformation, hidden knowledge, and research, you may face financial challenges related to shared resources but possess the power to emerge stronger from crises.

Mars in the 9th House: Adventurous and philosophical, you are driven to explore new beliefs, cultures, and ideas. Higher education or long-distance travel might be areas of focus, as you seek to broaden your perspective.

Mars in the 10th House: Your career takes center stage, and you are highly motivated to achieve recognition and success. Leadership suits you well, and you approach professional goals with ambition.

Mars in the 11th House: In group settings, you naturally assume a leadership role, and your energy is directed toward achieving long-term objectives. You flourish in social circles that share your ambitions.

Mars in the 12th House: Your drive may be channeled toward spiritual growth, healing, or working behind the scenes. You often seek solitude and introspection, using your energy to explore life’s deeper meanings.

𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, those with Taurus rising (Vrishabha Lagna) tend to exhibit a calm, practical, and grounded demeanor. As a Taurus ascendant, you naturally gravitate toward stability, comfort, and security in both your personal and professional life. You are patient, reliable, and have a strong desire to build lasting foundations. Consistency and a steady approach are hallmarks of your personality. Venus, your ruling planet, governs love, beauty, and material comforts. Where Venus is positioned in your chart reveals how you seek pleasure, express affection, and secure financial well-being, shaping your life’s direction.

Possible Nakshatras:

Krittika (2nd, 3rd, and 4th padas): You have a keen, discerning mindset with a focus on precision and perfection. Krittika natives are ambitious, and you pursue success with determination, often excelling in creative or leadership roles.

Rohini: Creativity and sensuality come naturally to you, and you are deeply connected to beauty and the arts. You possess charm and artistic flair, drawn to luxurious experiences, seeking comfort and pleasure in life.

Mrigashira (1st and 2nd padas): You are intellectually curious and adaptable, always in search of new knowledge and experiences. Mrigashira natives often channel their creativity into problem-solving, thriving in communication or travel-related ventures.

Venus through the Houses:

Venus in the 1st House: You exude charm, grace, and attractiveness, with a naturally magnetic personality. You prioritize harmony in your relationships and personal appearance, often bringing beauty and elegance into your everyday life.

Venus in the 2nd House: You focus on building financial security and material wealth, often thriving in areas like finance, luxury goods, or beauty. Your speech is pleasant, and you seek stability and comfort in a strong family environment.

Venus in the 3rd House: You communicate with creativity and elegance, often finding success in writing, media, or artistic expression. You may have close, supportive relationships with siblings and a flair for artistic endeavors.

Venus in the 4th House: Home is a source of emotional fulfillment, and you are drawn to beautifying your surroundings. You find joy in your family and heritage, creating a nurturing and comfortable domestic life.

Venus in the 5th House: Passionate and expressive, you thrive in creative or artistic fields. Love and romance play a central role in your happiness, and you may have a strong affinity for children, teaching, or the arts.

Venus in the 6th House: You bring beauty and balance to your everyday routines and work environment. While you enjoy helping others, be mindful of indulgence, particularly in health matters, and focus on maintaining harmony in your daily life.

Venus in the 7th House: Partnerships and relationships are a major focus, and you are drawn to loving, harmonious unions. You seek balance and beauty in your relationships and often attract partners who share your refined tastes.

Venus in the 8th House: You are drawn to transformative and deep relationships, often growing through shared resources or intimate bonds. Your love of mystery and intensity may lead you to explore hidden aspects of life, such as psychology or spirituality.

Venus in the 9th House: You seek harmony and beauty in philosophical, spiritual, or educational pursuits. Travel, higher learning, and broadening your horizons bring fulfillment, and you may be inclined toward creative or artistic teachings.

Venus in the 10th House: Your career may center around the arts, beauty, or luxury industries. You aim for recognition in areas where you can express your creativity, bringing grace and harmony into your professional endeavors.

Venus in the 11th House: You are highly social and enjoy connecting with groups that share your aspirations. Friendships and social networks provide support and inspiration, and you may find success in collaborative or artistic communities.

Venus in the 12th House: You are drawn to spiritual or mystical paths, often seeking solitude for creative inspiration. Your love for beauty and art may manifest in subtle or unconventional ways, and you may find fulfillment by working behind the scenes or helping others.

𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, a Gemini rising (Mithuna Lagna) bestows you with a lively, inquisitive, and mentally agile nature. As a Gemini ascendant, you are quick-thinking, adaptable, and always in pursuit of new experiences and knowledge. Your mind thrives in environments where communication, learning, and social interaction take center stage. You are naturally inclined toward exchanging ideas and engaging in stimulating conversations. Mercury, your ruling planet, governs intellect, communication, and analytical thinking. The position of Mercury in your chart will influence how you communicate, connect with others, and seek intellectual growth.

Possible Nakshatras:

Mrigashira (3rd and 4th padas): You are intellectually curious and driven by a constant desire for exploration. Mrigashira natives excel in communication, research, and learning, always seeking to broaden their knowledge base.

Ardra: Intense, focused, and transformative, Ardra natives are known for their deep analytical abilities. You have a keen mind and often shine in fields that require scientific or technical expertise.

Punarvasu (1st, 2nd, and 3rd padas): Optimistic and spiritually inclined, Punarvasu natives are nurturing and adaptable. You are drawn to new beginnings, and wisdom-seeking is central to your journey, often finding fulfillment through learning and personal growth.

Mercury through the Houses:

Mercury in the 1st House: You possess a sharp intellect, and your curiosity drives your interactions. Quick-witted and social, you navigate life’s challenges using communication and mental agility, thriving in dynamic environments.

Mercury in the 2nd House: With a talent for clear communication, you have the potential to build financial security through teaching, writing, or public speaking. Your focus is practical, often excelling in commerce or finance-related fields.

Mercury in the 3rd House: A natural communicator, you excel in writing, media, and intellectual endeavors. Your bond with siblings or close friends is important, and you shine in roles that involve networking and idea exchange.

Mercury in the 4th House: You integrate intellect and communication into your home life. You may be drawn to careers in education or real estate, and your home could serve as a center of learning and intellectual growth.

Mercury in the 5th House: Creative and intellectually playful, you excel in areas like teaching, writing, or the arts. You may have a strong interest in education, speculative ventures, or guiding children toward growth and learning.

Mercury in the 6th House: You are methodical and have a knack for problem-solving, especially in areas like health, work, or service. Your analytical nature helps you succeed in administrative, health-related, or organizational roles.

Mercury in the 7th House: Partnerships are intellectually stimulating for you, and you seek relationships that value communication and shared ideas. You may excel in professions centered around partnerships or communication.

Mercury in the 8th House: You are drawn to deep investigation, research, or fields like psychology. With a probing mind, you excel in uncovering hidden truths and may thrive in areas involving finance, transformation, or healing.

Mercury in the 9th House: Your curiosity pushes you toward higher education, travel, and philosophy. You may find success in teaching or sharing knowledge, excelling in writing, publishing, or fields that explore different belief systems.

Mercury in the 10th House: Your career likely revolves around communication, writing, or media. Ambitious in your intellectual pursuits, you bring a sharp, analytical mind to your professional life, aiming for success in public-facing roles.

Mercury in the 11th House: You flourish in social settings, finding success through networking and collaboration. Intellectual or technology-driven fields appeal to you, and you may be drawn to careers that foster social change or collective goals.

Mercury in the 12th House: You may gravitate toward introspective careers such as research, spirituality, or working behind the scenes. With a reflective and analytical mind, you find fulfillment in guiding others through intellectual or spiritual insights.

𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Cancer rising (Karka Lagna) imbues you with a sensitive, nurturing, and emotionally driven personality. As a Cancer ascendant, you have a deep connection to your emotions and seek comfort and security in your surroundings. You are empathetic, protective, and naturally drawn to caregiving, especially within close relationships or family settings. The Moon, your ruling planet, governs your emotions, intuition, and inner world. The position of the Moon in your chart reveals how you manage your emotional well-being, care for others, and seek stability in life.

Possible Nakshatras:

Punarvasu (4th pada): Adaptable, nurturing, and optimistic, Punarvasu natives are closely connected to family and home life. You find emotional satisfaction in supporting loved ones and creating a safe, comforting environment.

Pushya: Known for being deeply responsible and nurturing, Pushya natives are committed to fostering growth and stability. You excel in roles that allow you to care for others and provide emotional support.

Ashlesha: Intuitive and intense, Ashlesha natives have a profound understanding of emotions, both their own and others’. You have a gift for navigating complex emotional situations and can transform relationships through your emotional insight.

Moon through the Houses:

Moon in the 1st House: You are emotionally attuned, intuitive, and nurturing by nature. Your moods may fluctuate, but your ability to connect with others on an emotional level makes you a caring and empathetic individual.

Moon in the 2nd House: Your emotional well-being is closely tied to material security, and you focus on creating comfort for yourself and your family. You may thrive in areas related to finance, food, or any field where nurturing is central.

Moon in the 3rd House: You express your emotions through communication, often finding fulfillment in writing, speaking, or media. Close relationships with siblings or friends hold significant emotional value, and intellectual pursuits may provide emotional satisfaction.

Moon in the 4th House: Your home, family, and roots are central to your emotional security. You are deeply attached to your domestic life and may find success in real estate, home design, or caregiving professions.

Moon in the 5th House: Creative and playful, you invest a great deal of emotional energy in self-expression and relationships with children. The arts, education, or any field that allows you to nurture others creatively may be particularly fulfilling.

Moon in the 6th House: You are emotionally connected to service, often finding satisfaction in helping others through health, wellness, or caregiving. Balancing your emotional needs with work responsibilities is essential to maintain stability.

Moon in the 7th House: Partnerships are central to your emotional life, and you seek security through relationships. You are nurturing and empathetic in your partnerships, often prioritizing your partner's emotional well-being.

Moon in the 8th House: You are drawn to transformative emotional experiences and may have a deep interest in psychology, mystery, or healing. Your intuition helps you navigate life's emotional complexities, allowing you to grow through difficult circumstances.

Moon in the 9th House: Your emotional fulfillment comes through higher learning, travel, or spiritual exploration. You may be drawn to philosophical or spiritual teachings and may find success in careers like teaching, publishing, or spiritual guidance.

Moon in the 10th House: Your career plays a key role in your emotional well-being, and you seek public recognition for your work. You may excel in nurturing professions, public service, or roles where you can care for and guide others on a larger scale.

Moon in the 11th House: You are emotionally connected to your community and social circles, finding fulfillment through group activities and friendships. You may be drawn to social causes or humanitarian efforts, using your nurturing nature to inspire others.

Moon in the 12th House: You seek emotional satisfaction through introspection, solitude, and spiritual practices. Meditation, healing, or working behind the scenes to support others may provide deep emotional fulfillment. You may also guide others through emotional or spiritual transformations.

𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, those with Leo rising (Simha Lagna) are endowed with a strong, charismatic, and confident personality. As a Leo ascendant, you naturally gravitate toward leadership and enjoy being in the limelight. Your presence is radiant, and you often express yourself with boldness and creativity. The Sun, your ruling planet, represents vitality, authority, and self-expression. The position of the Sun in your chart will shape how you assert your identity, take charge, and influence your surroundings.

Possible Nakshatras:

Magha: Noble, proud, and inclined toward leadership, Magha natives often have a deep connection to their ancestral roots. You aim to uphold traditions with respect and dignity, seeking positions of authority and influence.

Purva Phalguni: Known for your charm and love of life's pleasures, you are drawn to creativity, beauty, and luxury. Purva Phalguni natives enjoy art, entertainment, and socializing, often thriving in environments that celebrate beauty and leisure.

Uttara Phalguni (1st pada): Practical and generous, you focus on creating long-term stability. Uttara Phalguni natives balance personal enjoyment with social responsibility, often excelling in leadership roles that benefit others and create lasting impact.

Sun through the Houses:

Sun in the 1st House: You possess a natural authority and exude confidence in all aspects of life. Leadership is second nature, and you often take initiative, inspiring those around you with your charisma and boldness.

Sun in the 2nd House: Your focus is on financial stability and building material success. You take pride in managing resources effectively, often gaining recognition for your ability to secure wealth and provide comfort for your family.

Sun in the 3rd House: A natural communicator, you are bold in expressing your ideas and excel in fields like writing, teaching, or media. Your influence grows through intellectual pursuits, and you often stand out in debates or discussions.

Sun in the 4th House: Your emotional well-being is deeply connected to your home and family life. You take pride in creating a secure and harmonious household, and you may find success in real estate, home-related industries, or caregiving.

Sun in the 5th House: Creative and expressive, you are passionate about self-expression and may excel in the arts, entertainment, or speculative ventures. Your playful nature and romantic spirit draw attention, and you thrive in environments that celebrate creativity.

Sun in the 6th House: Dedicated to service and hard work, you take on leadership roles in your workplace, organizing and improving systems. You are driven by a sense of duty and responsibility, often excelling in environments where you can help others and lead by example.

Sun in the 7th House: Partnerships play a significant role in your life, and you seek recognition through your relationships. You may be drawn to influential partners, and your leadership qualities are likely to manifest in both business and marriage.

Sun in the 8th House: You are drawn to deep, transformative experiences and may have a strong interest in psychology, research, or the occult. Your strength often comes through managing crises or handling other people's resources, where your leadership shines in challenging situations.

Sun in the 9th House: You are passionate about expanding your horizons through philosophy, education, and travel. You may find success in teaching, publishing, or roles that allow you to influence others with your knowledge of different cultures and ideas.

Sun in the 10th House: Ambition drives you to seek leadership and authority in your career. You are highly focused on achieving public recognition and leaving a lasting legacy through your professional accomplishments.

Sun in the 11th House: Focused on long-term goals, you often work within large organizations or social causes. You thrive in group settings and are likely to gain recognition through your contributions to collective efforts, often taking on leadership roles within your community.

Sun in the 12th House: You may be inclined toward solitude, spirituality, or working behind the scenes. Your leadership qualities are expressed in more quiet, introspective ways, often finding fulfillment through helping others or pursuing spiritual growth.

𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Virgo rising (Kanya Lagna) gives you a practical, analytical, and service-oriented nature. As a Virgo ascendant, you are detail-focused, methodical, and constantly striving for improvement in yourself and your surroundings. Known for your intellectual approach, you excel at organizing and refining everything you do. Your ruling planet is Mercury, which governs intellect, communication, and analytical thinking. The placement of Mercury in your chart will show how you process information, communicate, and manage your day-to-day responsibilities.

Possible Nakshatras:

Uttara Phalguni (2nd, 3rd, and 4th padas): You are responsible, hardworking, and focused on creating long-term success. Uttara Phalguni natives balance personal happiness with social responsibilities, and your generosity and dedication make you stand out in leadership and supportive roles.

Hasta: Resourceful and skilled, you have a natural talent for detail and craftsmanship. Hasta natives are adaptable and excellent problem-solvers, thriving in service-oriented or creative fields where precision is required.

Chitra (1st and 2nd padas): Charismatic and creative, Chitra natives are driven to make their mark on the world through beauty and artistic expression. You may excel in design, architecture, or any field that allows you to create something lasting and beautiful.

Mercury through the Houses:

Mercury in the 1st House: Highly intellectual and communicative, you possess a sharp mind and an analytical approach to life. You excel in fields that require critical thinking, such as writing, teaching, or problem-solving, and your curiosity keeps you engaged in constant learning.

Mercury in the 2nd House: Skilled in managing resources, you are practical and calculated when it comes to building wealth. Your communication abilities play a key role in your financial success, making you thrive in business, commerce, or public speaking.

Mercury in the 3rd House: You have a natural affinity for communication, writing, and intellectual exchange. A strong bond with siblings and peers is likely, and your quick thinking and adaptability make you well-suited for media, marketing, or any field that requires sharp mental agility.

Mercury in the 4th House: Your intellectual pursuits are centered around home and family life. You may find success in real estate, education, or home-based enterprises, using your sharp mind to create stability and security within your personal environment.

Mercury in the 5th House: Creative and intellectually curious, you enjoy engaging in teaching, the arts, or speculative ventures. You approach creativity with analysis and precision, making you an excellent mentor or academic guide to others.

Mercury in the 6th House: Highly organized and detail-oriented, you excel in problem-solving within work or health-related fields. Your practical nature helps you navigate daily responsibilities with ease, leading to success in administrative, healthcare, or service professions.

Mercury in the 7th House: Partnerships hold intellectual significance for you, and you seek mental stimulation in relationships. You may excel in consulting, law, or client-based services, where your analytical skills and clear communication are highly valued.

Mercury in the 8th House: You have a strong inclination toward research and uncovering hidden truths. Whether in finance, psychology, or healing, your intellectual depth allows you to solve complex problems and bring clarity to mysterious or transformative situations.

Mercury in the 9th House: Your intellectual curiosity drives you toward higher education, travel, and philosophical exploration. You may find success in teaching, publishing, or law, where your ability to break down complex ideas helps others understand new perspectives.

Mercury in the 10th House: Career-oriented and ambitious, you thrive in professions that demand intellect and analytical skills. Business, technology, or media are areas where your sharp mind shines, and your problem-solving abilities bring you recognition and success.

Mercury in the 11th House: You excel in social settings and collaborative environments, often finding success through networking and teamwork. Intellectual or technology-driven fields attract you, and you may thrive in roles that promote social change or collective goals.

Mercury in the 12th House: Reflective and introspective, you are drawn to deep research or spiritual pursuits. You find fulfillment working behind the scenes or in healing professions, using your analytical abilities to provide clarity and understanding to those in need.

𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Libra rising (Tula Lagna) grants you a diplomatic, charming, and relationship-oriented personality. As a Libra ascendant, you have a natural inclination towards balance, harmony, and beauty, especially in how you relate to others. You seek fairness and often serve as a mediator, working to create peace and equality in your surroundings. Your ruling planet is Venus, which governs love, aesthetics, and harmony. The placement of Venus in your chart will illuminate how you approach relationships, beauty, and your pursuit of comfort and pleasure in life.

Possible Nakshatras:

Chitra (3rd and 4th padas): You are creative and charismatic, driven to leave your mark on the world through artistic expression. Chitra natives often excel in fields that require design, craftsmanship, or an appreciation for beauty and aesthetics.

Swati: Independence and adaptability define your nature. Swati natives are known for their grace and flexibility in overcoming life’s challenges, often succeeding in diplomacy, negotiation, and maintaining balance in difficult situations.

Vishakha (1st, 2nd, and 3rd padas): You are ambitious, focused, and determined to achieve your goals. Vishakha natives possess strong leadership qualities and thrive in roles that require perseverance, focus, and a relentless drive for success.

Venus through the Houses:

Venus in the 1st House: Your charm, grace, and natural attractiveness draw others to you. You place a high value on relationships and beauty, excelling in fields where diplomacy, creativity, or public relations are key elements of success.

Venus in the 2nd House: You prioritize material wealth and comfort, often using your creativity to build financial security. Success may come in areas related to luxury goods, finance, or the arts, and your refined taste adds value to your professional and personal pursuits.

Venus in the 3rd House: Creative communication is your strength, and you excel in writing, media, or other intellectual endeavors. Your relationships with siblings may be important, and you enjoy collaborating with others, exchanging ideas, and sharing artistic or intellectual projects.

Venus in the 4th House: Your home is a sanctuary of beauty and comfort, and you are deeply attached to family life. You may find success in real estate, interior design, or any career that involves creating harmonious environments that nurture both body and soul.

Venus in the 5th House: Romance, creativity, and self-expression play a central role in your life. You may excel in the arts, entertainment, or speculative ventures, and your romantic relationships are vital to your emotional well-being and personal development.

Venus in the 6th House: You bring a sense of beauty and balance to your work life, excelling in service-oriented professions. Careers related to health, wellness, or aesthetics suit you well, as you find ways to combine practicality with your refined sense of harmony.

Venus in the 7th House: Partnerships are the core of your life, and you seek love, harmony, and balance in your relationships. You are likely to excel in romantic and business partnerships that align with your values, and you may thrive in careers that require negotiation and diplomacy.

Venus in the 8th House: You are drawn to deep, transformative relationships, and your love life may be marked by intensity and passion. You may also find success in fields like finance, psychology, or research, where your exploration of the deeper aspects of life and relationships leads to growth.

Venus in the 9th House: Beauty and balance are themes in your pursuit of higher knowledge, philosophy, and travel. You may find fulfillment in teaching, writing, or exploring different cultures, where your appreciation for aesthetics and harmony broadens your understanding of the world.

Venus in the 10th House: Your career is likely to be focused on the arts, beauty, or diplomacy, and you strive for recognition in these areas. Fields like public relations, law, or creative industries may be especially fulfilling, as you work toward success with grace and poise.

Venus in the 11th House: You thrive in group settings, where your charm and diplomatic nature help you connect with others and achieve shared goals. You may find success in social causes, technology, or any career that involves networking, collaboration, and collective progress.

Venus in the 12th House: You are drawn to spirituality, art, or healing, often finding fulfillment in working behind the scenes. Your creativity and sensitivity may be expressed through charitable work, healing professions, or spiritual retreats, where you can use your gifts to help others find peace and comfort.

𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, those with Scorpio rising (Vrishchika Lagna) are characterized by their intense, magnetic, and determined nature. As a Scorpio ascendant, you are known for your emotional depth, resilience, and transformative energy. You approach life with a sense of intensity, seeking to uncover its deeper mysteries and hidden truths. Your ruling planet is Mars, representing action, courage, and vitality. The placement of Mars in your chart shows how you assert yourself, navigate challenges, and pursue your goals with laser focus and determination.

Possible Nakshatras:

Vishakha (4th pada): Ambitious and driven, you are focused on achieving your goals with perseverance. Vishakha natives excel in leadership and competitive environments, using their strong will and determination to succeed.

Anuradha: Loyal, compassionate, and deeply spiritual, Anuradha natives are skilled in forming strong, supportive partnerships. You balance power with grace and are known for your devotion to your personal and spiritual path.

Jyeshta: Authoritative, protective, and powerful, you have a natural instinct to control your surroundings. Jyeshta natives often take on leadership roles and possess a deep understanding of responsibility and authority.

Mars through the Houses:

Mars in the 1st House: You are assertive, confident, and have a commanding presence. Leadership comes naturally to you, and your courage and resilience help you overcome obstacles with determination. You face challenges head-on, unafraid to take risks.

Mars in the 2nd House: Your focus is on achieving financial security and stability. You excel in business, finance, or managing resources, approaching wealth-building with strategy and a strong determination to succeed materially.

Mars in the 3rd House: You are a dynamic communicator, excelling in fields like writing, media, or any domain requiring quick thinking. You thrive in intellectual competition and may have a strong, sometimes competitive, relationship with siblings.

Mars in the 4th House: Protective and nurturing, you are deeply invested in your home and family life. However, your intensity can sometimes create emotional tension, so finding a balance between control and compassion is key for harmonious relationships at home.

Mars in the 5th House: You are passionate about creativity and take bold risks in speculative ventures or artistic pursuits. Your romantic life is full of excitement and intensity, and you naturally assume leadership roles in creative or competitive settings.

Mars in the 6th House: Highly disciplined, you excel in work environments that involve service, health, or conflict resolution. Your strong work ethic and ability to confront challenges head-on ensure success in overcoming obstacles and achieving goals.

Mars in the 7th House: You are attracted to strong-willed, assertive partners, and your relationships are often marked by intensity and passion. While conflicts may arise, these challenges push you to grow, fostering deeper and more meaningful connections.

Mars in the 8th House: You are naturally drawn to life's deeper mysteries, and your career may involve research, psychology, or handling joint finances. Your ability to navigate crises with strength makes you a go-to person during challenging times of transformation.

Mars in the 9th House: Adventurous and curious, you are passionate about exploring new cultures, philosophies, and spiritual beliefs. You are driven to expand your knowledge and horizons, often through travel or higher education, seeking wisdom from life’s experiences.

Mars in the 10th House: Ambitious and career-driven, you often rise to leadership positions in your professional life. You thrive in competitive environments and have a relentless drive for success, making you highly respected in your chosen field.

Mars in the 11th House: A natural leader in group settings, you focus your energy on achieving long-term goals. You thrive in collaborative environments, especially in social or professional networks where collective success is the primary objective.

Mars in the 12th House: You are drawn to introspection and may find fulfillment in spiritual or healing professions. Working behind the scenes or in isolated environments suits you well, and you often use your energy to guide others through deep emotional or psychological challenges.

𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Sagittarius rising (Dhanu Lagna) endows you with an optimistic, adventurous, and philosophical nature. As a Sagittarius ascendant, you have a strong drive for exploration, growth, and gaining a deeper understanding of life. You are constantly seeking knowledge and truth, often through travel, education, or spiritual pursuits. Your ruling planet is Jupiter, the planet of wisdom, expansion, and higher learning. Jupiter’s placement in your chart reveals how you strive for personal growth, broaden your horizons, and achieve success by living ethically and seeking wisdom.

Possible Nakshatras:

Mula: Intensely curious, you are driven to uncover the core truth of any matter. Mula natives have a deep connection to transformation and are known for their ability to let go of the past, seek deeper truths, and embrace renewal.

Purva Ashadha: Ambitious, creative, and determined, you focus on achieving your goals despite challenges. Purva Ashadha natives excel in leadership and social influence, using their resilience to rise above obstacles.

Uttara Ashadha (1st pada): Practical and focused on long-term success, Uttara Ashadha natives are known for their strong sense of duty and responsibility. You work diligently and achieve recognition through hard work, persistence, and dedication.

Jupiter through the Houses:

Jupiter in the 1st House: You radiate optimism, wisdom, and a sense of purpose, making you a natural leader and mentor. You influence others through your expansive knowledge and positive outlook, often taking on roles that inspire and guide others toward growth and understanding.

Jupiter in the 2nd House: You focus on creating financial security and material wealth through ethical means. Whether through teaching, advising, or religious pursuits, your ability to accumulate resources is supported by your wisdom and deep understanding of financial matters.

Jupiter in the 3rd House: Intellectually curious, you excel in communication, writing, or teaching. You enjoy sharing your insights with others, and your strong bond with siblings or peers is likely to be centered on intellectual or philosophical exchanges.

Jupiter in the 4th House: Emotional fulfillment comes from your home and family. You may be drawn to careers in real estate, education, or offering guidance to others. Creating a stable, nurturing environment for yourself and loved ones brings you peace and satisfaction.

Jupiter in the 5th House: You are highly creative and find joy in self-expression, education, and mentoring. Whether through teaching, raising children, or engaging in intellectual pursuits, you experience fulfillment in nurturing creativity and growth in others.

Jupiter in the 6th House: Service is central to your life’s purpose, and you excel in professions related to health, wellness, or law. You have a talent for resolving conflicts and offering guidance in difficult situations, often rising to positions of authority and respect.

Jupiter in the 7th House: Partnerships—both personal and professional—are key to your growth. You seek relationships based on intellectual and spiritual connections, and you may excel in fields such as law, consulting, or diplomacy, where your wisdom helps resolve disputes.

Jupiter in the 8th House: You are drawn to transformative fields such as psychology, research, or financial management. Your deep insights allow you to manage joint resources or navigate crises with wisdom, turning challenges into opportunities for growth.

Jupiter in the 9th House: You are passionate about higher education, philosophy, and spirituality, often finding success in teaching, publishing, or international travel. Sharing your knowledge and expanding your horizons brings fulfillment, and you inspire others to do the same.

Jupiter in the 10th House: Your career focuses on leadership, education, or guiding others through wisdom. You often rise to prominent positions in fields like law, education, or religion, where your ability to lead with ethics and integrity earns you recognition and respect.

Jupiter in the 11th House: You thrive in group settings and collaborative efforts, often succeeding through networking and collective projects. You are drawn to humanitarian or community-driven causes and work to achieve long-term goals that create positive social impact.

Jupiter in the 12th House: Introspective and spiritually inclined, you find fulfillment in charitable or healing professions. You excel in fields that require solitude, deep reflection, or spiritual guidance, and your wisdom makes you a source of comfort for others in times of crisis.

𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Capricorn rising (Makara Lagna) bestows a disciplined, ambitious, and responsible nature. As a Capricorn ascendant, you are deeply focused on long-term success and stability, often working with patience and determination to reach your goals. You value hard work, structure, and perseverance, understanding that success often comes through sustained effort and sacrifice. Your ruling planet is Saturn, symbolizing discipline, endurance, and the lessons learned through challenges. The placement of Saturn in your chart will indicate how you handle responsibilities, face obstacles, and steadily build your life over time.

Possible Nakshatras:

Uttara Ashadha (2nd, 3rd, and 4th padas): Practical, dedicated, and hardworking, you are focused on long-term success. Uttara Ashadha natives are known for their strong sense of duty and ability to rise to positions of leadership through perseverance.

Shravana: Wise, attentive, and detail-oriented, Shravana natives excel in learning and communication. You may find success in fields that involve listening, observation, and intellectual growth, often using your knowledge to guide others.

Dhanishta (1st and 2nd padas): Ambitious and resourceful, you have a natural talent for managing resources and leading others. Dhanishta natives often excel in business, finance, or leadership roles, driven by a desire for material success and achievement.

Saturn through the Houses:

Saturn in the 1st House: You possess a serious, mature, and responsible demeanor, often taking on leadership roles early in life. Your disciplined nature helps you overcome challenges with resilience, and you are known for your patience and ability to work toward long-term goals.

Saturn in the 2nd House: Building financial security is a priority for you, often achieved through hard work and careful financial planning. You may face financial challenges in your early years, but your persistence and discipline ensure material success later in life.

Saturn in the 3rd House: A careful and thoughtful communicator, you prefer to plan your words and actions. You may excel in writing, teaching, or fields that require patience and precision, achieving success through careful effort and attention to detail.

Saturn in the 4th House: Your connection to home and family is strong, though you may face responsibilities or challenges in these areas. Over time, through hard work, you create a stable and secure domestic environment, often improving family conditions through perseverance.

Saturn in the 5th House: You take a disciplined and cautious approach to creativity, romance, and speculative ventures. While not impulsive in these areas, your steady and serious attitude leads to long-term success, particularly in teaching or guiding others creatively.

Saturn in the 6th House: Hardworking and service-oriented, you excel in fields that require discipline, precision, and a focus on routine tasks. Success in health, law, administration, or any field that demands attention to detail is likely to come through sustained effort.

Saturn in the 7th House: Your relationships are serious and committed, though you may face delays or challenges in forming long-lasting partnerships. You seek stable, dependable connections, and your disciplined approach often leads to enduring, successful unions.

Saturn in the 8th House: You are drawn to areas involving deep transformation, research, or financial management, particularly in dealing with joint resources or inheritance. Though you may face challenges in these areas, your resilience allows you to overcome difficulties and emerge stronger.

Saturn in the 9th House: Dedicated to higher learning, philosophy, or spirituality, you take a disciplined approach to expanding your knowledge. Recognition in teaching, law, or religious fields may come through your long-term focus and commitment to mastering your chosen field.

Saturn in the 10th House: Career success is a central theme in your life, and you are determined to rise to leadership positions. Through perseverance and hard work, you often gain authority and recognition in your professional endeavors, thriving in roles that demand responsibility.

Saturn in the 11th House: Focused on achieving long-term aspirations, you work hard to build strong social networks and group connections. Although you may face delays or challenges in reaching your goals, your disciplined and persistent approach ensures success in large organizations or group efforts.

Saturn in the 12th House: Introspective and drawn to spiritual or healing professions, you may work in isolation or behind the scenes. Your patient and disciplined nature allows you to contribute meaningfully through charitable work, spiritual guidance, or in helping others in subtle but impactful ways.

𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Aquarius rising (Kumbha Lagna) imbues you with a visionary, intellectual, and socially conscious character. As an Aquarius ascendant, you are driven by the desire to contribute to the greater good, often focusing on humanitarian causes and societal progress. Known for your innovative thinking and forward-looking approach, you value knowledge, social reform, and collective well-being. Saturn, your ruling planet, represents structure, discipline, and long-term goals. The placement of Saturn in your chart highlights how you channel your ideals into tangible accomplishments, guided by discipline and perseverance.

Possible Nakshatras:

Dhanishta (3rd and 4th padas): Ambitious and resourceful, you excel in managing resources and networks effectively. Dhanishta natives are known for their leadership abilities and focus on achieving material success, often through disciplined efforts.

Shatabhishak: Intellectual, independent, and driven by humanitarian ideals, Shatabhishak natives are natural healers and innovators. You explore unconventional paths and seek to bring about transformation through knowledge, technology, and social reform.

Purva Bhadrapada (1st pada): Philosophical and idealistic, you are focused on higher spiritual or intellectual pursuits. Purva Bhadrapada natives aim to initiate positive change, often using wisdom and transformative actions to achieve lasting impact.

Saturn through the Houses:

Saturn in the 1st House: You are serious, responsible, and self-disciplined, often exuding a maturity beyond your years. Your strong sense of purpose leads you to take on leadership roles, particularly in social or humanitarian causes, where your dedication and patience pave the way for long-term success.

Saturn in the 2nd House: Your focus is on achieving financial security through careful planning and disciplined saving. You may accumulate wealth slowly but steadily, ensuring long-term stability by adhering to a cautious and methodical approach to material gains.

Saturn in the 3rd House: You are disciplined in communication, often excelling in writing, teaching, or intellectual work. Learning and skill development come through patience and persistence, and you may take on significant responsibilities with siblings or close peers.

Saturn in the 4th House: Challenges or responsibilities may arise related to home and family life, but you are committed to creating a stable and secure environment. Through hard work and sacrifice, you eventually build a solid foundation for yourself and your loved ones.

Saturn in the 5th House: In creative endeavors, romance, or speculative ventures, your approach is cautious and disciplined. Although you may face delays or obstacles, your methodical nature ensures that your efforts lead to long-term success, particularly in guiding or teaching others.

Saturn in the 6th House: You excel in service-oriented or health-related professions, where attention to detail and discipline are essential. Challenges in your work environment or health may arise, but your perseverance enables you to overcome obstacles and succeed through persistence.

Saturn in the 7th House: Relationships and partnerships are serious and long-lasting, though you may encounter delays in forming connections. You seek stable, committed unions, and your disciplined approach to relationships ensures enduring and meaningful bonds.

Saturn in the 8th House: You are drawn to deep, transformative experiences, often involving joint resources, inheritance, or crises. Your methodical approach to these intense areas of life helps you navigate challenges, leading to personal growth and strength through adversity.

Saturn in the 9th House: Higher learning, philosophy, and spirituality are areas of deep interest, and you approach them with dedication and discipline. Recognition or success in academic, legal, or religious fields may come through long-term commitment to your intellectual or spiritual pursuits.

Saturn in the 10th House: Career is a primary focus for you, and you rise to positions of authority through hard work and perseverance. Leadership roles suit you well, as you thrive in structured environments where discipline, organization, and long-term planning are valued.

Saturn in the 11th House: Your focus is on achieving long-term aspirations and building strong social networks. Though you may face delays or challenges in reaching your goals, your disciplined approach ensures eventual success, especially in community or humanitarian efforts.

Saturn in the 12th House: You are introspective and may be drawn to spiritual, healing, or charitable work. Working behind the scenes or in isolation allows you to contribute meaningfully to society, using your patience and discipline to help others through service or quiet dedication.

𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐑𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

In Vedic astrology, Pisces rising (Meena Lagna) imparts a compassionate, imaginative, and spiritually inclined nature. As a Pisces ascendant, your intuition and sensitivity drive your actions, and you often seek deeper meaning in life. You are idealistic, empathetic, and naturally drawn to creative or spiritual pursuits. Jupiter, your ruling planet, governs wisdom, growth, and expansion, guiding you in your quest for knowledge, spiritual understanding, and personal development. The placement of Jupiter in your chart reveals how you grow intellectually and spiritually while helping others on their journey.

Possible Nakshatras:

Purva Bhadrapada (2nd, 3rd, and 4th padas): Idealistic and philosophical, you are focused on spiritual transformation and making a meaningful impact on the world. Purva Bhadrapada natives often work toward creating lasting change through wisdom and altruism.

Uttara Bhadrapada: Calm, composed, and deeply spiritual, Uttara Bhadrapada natives bring stability and balance to their lives. You are focused on attaining inner peace and wisdom, often seeking emotional and spiritual harmony.

Revati: Compassionate, nurturing, and imaginative, Revati natives have a strong connection to the arts and spirituality. You excel in roles that involve healing, creativity, or guiding others, often bringing care and emotional support to those around you.

Jupiter through the Houses:

Jupiter in the 1st House: You are naturally optimistic, wise, and generous, with a strong sense of purpose. Your philosophical and spiritual outlook on life often inspires others, and you may find yourself in leadership roles where you can guide and uplift people through your compassion.

Jupiter in the 2nd House: Focused on building wealth through ethical means, you use your wisdom to create material security. You may find success in fields related to finance, education, or spiritual guidance, and your generosity often leads to prosperity.

Jupiter in the 3rd House: Your intellectual curiosity drives you to excel in communication-based professions such as writing or teaching. You love sharing your knowledge and often inspire others with your deep insights and broad perspectives.

Jupiter in the 4th House: Emotional fulfillment comes from home and family life, where you create a nurturing environment. You may be drawn to careers in real estate, education, or caregiving, using your compassionate nature to bring stability and support to others.

Jupiter in the 5th House: You are passionate about creativity, education, and mentoring. Your love for learning and sharing knowledge leads to success in teaching or guiding others, especially in creative or academic settings where you can inspire growth and development.

Jupiter in the 6th House: Service and healing are central to your life, and you excel in professions related to health and wellness. Your wisdom and practical approach to problem-solving make you a valuable asset in any work environment, particularly those focused on helping others.

Jupiter in the 7th House: Relationships are deeply meaningful to you, and you seek spiritual and intellectual connections with your partners. Success may come through careers in law, consulting, or diplomacy, where your wisdom and ethical approach are highly valued.

Jupiter in the 8th House: You are drawn to profound research and transformation, excelling in areas like psychology, finance, or healing. Your ability to guide others through times of crisis or personal transformation makes you a powerful source of support during difficult periods.

Jupiter in the 9th House: Passionate about philosophy, higher education, and spiritual growth, you excel in teaching, publishing, or religious fields. Your love for sharing knowledge and exploring new ideas allows you to inspire others on their path to enlightenment.

Jupiter in the 10th House: Your career revolves around leadership, teaching, or spiritual guidance, and you often rise to prominence through your wisdom and ethical practices. You thrive in roles where you can lead and mentor others, helping them achieve their potential.

Jupiter in the 11th House: You are social and enjoy working with organizations or groups focused on humanitarian or spiritual causes. Your long-term goals often involve making a positive impact on society, and you find success through collaborative efforts and shared ideals.

Jupiter in the 12th House: Drawn to spirituality, introspection, or charitable work, you often excel in fields that involve healing or solitude. Your deep understanding of life’s mysteries makes you a powerful guide for others, especially during times of emotional or spiritual crisis.

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

[sugarsprinklesoul]

Actions to Become Your Best Self

Cultivate Positive Habits Develop routines that promote physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This includes regular exercise, healthy eating, mindfulness practices, and sufficient sleep.

Set Clear Goals Define what you want to achieve and create a plan to get there. Break down your goals into manageable steps and track your progress regularly.

Embrace Lifelong Learning Continuously seek knowledge and new skills. Read books, take courses, and stay curious about the world around you.

Practice Self-Compassion Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during difficult times. Recognize that everyone makes mistakes and that growth comes from learning from them.

Surround Yourself with Positive Influences Build a supportive network of friends, family, and mentors who encourage and inspire you. Distance yourself from negative influences that hinder your growth.

Maintain a Growth Mindset Believe in your ability to improve and adapt. View challenges as opportunities to learn and grow rather than as insurmountable obstacles.

Prioritize Self-Care Make time for activities that rejuvenate and relax you. This can include hobbies, nature walks, meditation, or simply spending time alone.

Stay Organized Keep your environment and schedule organized. This reduces stress and allows you to focus more effectively on your goals.

Develop Emotional Intelligence Work on understanding and managing your emotions. This includes practicing empathy, effective communication, and conflict resolution skills.

Practice Gratitude Regularly reflect on the things you are grateful for. This can enhance your overall happiness and shift your focus to the positive aspects of your life.

Take Responsibility Own your actions and decisions. Recognize that you have the power to shape your life and take proactive steps towards your desired outcomes.

Give Back Contribute to your community or help others in need. Acts of kindness can provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment.

[literaila]

slip-up

gojo satoru x fem!reader

summary: megumi says something he's not supposed to

warnings: bit of sad megumi (same babe), gojo is a terrible comforter, reader doesn't get a lot of screen time but she's always there, a good lack of conflict resolution

a/n: the one-shot that started this series. i figured it was time to give it up

last part | next part

*

year four.

megumi doesn't notice the slip-up right when he says it. he's not even really paying attention to the conversation. 

instead, he's thinking about the homework assignment he was supposed to turn in today--the one that gojo refused (couldn't) help him with. 

"my mom usually drops us off," he's telling his teacher, trying to be polite like you taught him and not start whining (like gojo taught him). "but she's out of town right now, so gojo dropped us off instead and he gets the times confused..." 

in all honesty, megumi could blame this whole thing on gojo. because it was his fault. 

usually, you woke him and tsumiki up, pulling on his hair when he whined into the pillows, packing their lunches while they both sat at the table, eating cereal or tamagoyaki. usually, you reminded megumi to tuck in his shirt and helped the two of them get their books together, taking an occasional moment to shout at megumi's budget dad to get up before he was late. usually, you walked them to the door, kissing them both goodbye and watching both of them until they closed the door. 

later on, you'd be there again, welcoming them home with another smile, asking about their days. forcing them into a thorough recap. 

but today megumi woke up with a sore neck and gojo smiling at him, asking if he was planning on being buried in his bed. 

because even though megumi heard you tell gojo that he needed to help out, step up, the mornings while you were gone, all of you should've known better. 

megumi hasn't even ever seen gojo out of bed before nine-thirty. 

so here he was, with his shirt untucked, his homework missing, and a bag of lollipops that gojo packed for lunch. 

here he was, three hours late for school, trying to explain to his teacher that it wasn't his fault. 

and here he was, accidentally calling you mom. 

but megumi doesn't even realize that until his teacher smiles a little bit, telling him that she understands, asking him when his mom gets back. 

megumi freezes. 

the word repeats in his mind, and he finally realizes his slip-up. 

sure, he's heard tsumiki call you it before--because for all intents and purposes, that's what you were. after four years of your unconditional love, the two of them knew, truly, that they could depend on you. 

but megumi has never had a mom, and he doesn't now. 

so it's still gojo's fault when the first tear rolls down his cheek. which megumi promptly wipes away. he's not going to cry--he's not the sort of kid that cries. he prides himself on it, actually. not needing the same sort of attention that he's seen his classmates get, never feeling things that deeply. 

but he's crying now, and his neck still hurts as he turns away from his teacher, going to sit down at his desk. 

and megumi isn't the type of kid that cries, but when he puts his head down, his cheeks feel a little damp. 

*

megumi's got a headache now--another reason why he doesn't cry--and he sort of wants to curl up in bed until tsumiki gets home, and then convince her to run away with him. 

but he doesn't. 

when gojo unlocks the door, megumi goes through it without stopping to look around. he drags his backpack to his room--gojo watching the whole time, of course--and closes the door before the man can say anything stupid. 

he can't deal with him right now. or ever, actually. 

megumi sets his backpack up against the wall with a brief thought about homework and the class he's going to miss because of this, but he doesn't care enough to dwell on it. 

everything about him feels stiff, like glue got between the seems of his very core. 

he's ten years old. he shouldn't have to worry about anything. 

he takes off his blazer, sets it on his desk with sweaty palms, and feels quite naked--even with the layers of clothes and lack of eyes. and his head hurts. megumi wants to get up and restart his day just so he can tell some version of his former self not to be so stupid. 

but he knows that's just the guilt talking, so he ignores that too. 

and it's only ten minutes into his glooming that there's a knock on the door, and gojo doesn't knock, so megumi knows immediately that something's wrong. 

he's lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, but he leans up on his elbow when you peek your head into the room. 

for a brief moment, megumi is so relieved to see you that he almost jumps up and clings to you--like some child would. 

he wants to hold onto you and beg you not to leave again, because everything seems to go wrong when you’re not there. he wants to tell you that he’s scared, and that he’s not sure what to do.

but he refrains, and blinks idly, confused about why you're here, and why his heart hurts just from looking at you. 

“hey, you okay?” you whisper, taking a step into the dark room. you don't look banged up, and megumi wonders what gojo said to get you to come home. he probably told you that megumi was dying, or something. 

you sit on the edge of his bed, and your hand is on his forehead before megumi can blink. “you feel sick?” 

megumi nods, but his eyes don’t meet yours. it's a small enough lie. 

“i’m sorry. did satoru give you any medicine?” 

“did you have to come home for me?” 

you smile, slightly. “no, buddy, don’t worry. it was easier than they said, just a grade one. plus i kinda rushed it cause i missed you guys.” you push his hair out of his eyes, “now, medicine?”

“i don’t want any.” 

“if you don’t feel good—“ 

“actually,” he interrupts. “can—i, um, i don’t really want to talk.” 

you pause, eyes roaming over his face. “oh. okay. that’s fine.” 

you remove your hands from him immediately, walls of metaphorical space flying up between the two of you. “i’ll leave you alone. just ask if you need anything, okay? i’m going to go unpack.”

he nods and you give him a little grin. 

and right as you're at the door, he falters. he doesn’t really want you to go. he wants you to crawl into bed with him, treat him like he's actually sick, and let him lay with his head in your lap. he wants to ask you the same question that's been in his head since he said it, but he can't. 

“y/n?” he whispers, instead, your name feeling wrong in his mouth. 

“yeah?"

“will... will you get gojo?" he asks, even though it's not what he wants to say at all. "i want to talk to him.” 

“gojo?” you frown, looking at him. “yeah. of course, yeah. i’ll go get him. one sec.” 

and when you close the door, megumi feels like he’s said something wrong. slipped up again. 

he sits there and waits, feeling incorrect in his body. he wants you to come back and tell him that it'll all be fine, but he knows that you won't. if there's one thing you're good at, it's respecting boundaries. 

and megumi has a lot of them. 

gojo doesn’t knock when he comes into the room, and megumi is so lost in thought that he jumps as soon as the door clicks open. 

megumi’s neck flies as he looks at him, wide eyes. he's already sat up, preparing himself for an influx of anger. 

“is this about your lunch?” gojo asks, immediately, words fast and smooth. “because that wasn’t my fault. i thought your school did that.”

“you bought us our lunchboxes,” megumi argues, “you made me get the weird one with the dragon.” 

“do not insult dracomon like that.” 

megumi rolls his eyes. “whatever.” 

“so, you wanna talk to me, huh?" gojo sits on megumi’s desk chair, legs hanging off the sides. “i think this is the first real conversation we’ve ever had.” 

megumi rolls his eyes again. 

gojo waves a hand. "alright. what is it?" 

megumi pauses. he can't ask gojo. even if he had an answer, it would be the least trustworthy version of one. 

he scratches his neck, not sure how to lie about this. knowing that he's not supposed to lie in the first place. 

he's doing everything wrong today. 

gojo shakes his head, white hair the victim of many fashion crimes. “spit it out, kid. i just did you a huge favor, and i don’t have time for the attitude.” 

“you didn’t do anything,” megumi frowns, crossing his arms. 

gojo snorts. “you think they just say ‘come get your child’ when you’re crying at your desk?” he asks, rhetorically, and megumi’s face goes still. “no, they disrupted my nap, saying that you needed to be picked up and handed me a card for a child psychologist.” 

“they told you?” 

he nods. “and i didn’t tell y/n,” he grins, self-satisfied. “so you’re welcome.” 

“why not?” 

“because she would’ve freaked out, and i don’t need that, and i’m pretty sure you don’t want that…” 

megumi nods immediately. 

“it can stay our secret if you tell me what’s going on. i’ll edit the report when y/n asks,” then he turns, looking at the door. “even though she’s already listening in.” 

“really?” megumi bites the inside of his cheek, checking the crack under the door for feet. 

satoru kicks him. “no. she’s in her room. now, talk. i don’t know how long she’ll take.” 

megumi swallows. he doesn’t really want to ask—not his only real question—but he’s already gotten this far. 

at least it doesn't matter what he says, because no one will believe anything gojo makes up anyway. 

“megumi…” gojo prods. 

“do you know where my mom is?” 

there’s a pause. a very long pause where megumi feels like he’s being scrutinized.

he can tell that gojo is looking at him very closely, a microscope to megumi’s cell, even though he can’t see his eyes.

“i—“ gojo pulls a strand of hair by his ear. clearing his throat. “i, um, im not sure. why?” 

“no reason.” 

there’s a very weird wince on the man’s face. “do you want to… talk about them? your… parents?” 

“no,” megumi says immediately. 

gojo sighs. “look, i’ll tell you if you really want to know—“ 

“i don’t care. i just… i don’t care.” 

“…okay.” 

“okay.” 

the two of them are both lying. they have the same neck-scratching, and looking away tells. if you were in the room, you would be monitoring both of them very harshly. probably scolding them for the look on both of their faces.

gojo’s expression is so much weirder than megumi’s ever seen it. “are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?” 

“i just wanted to know if you knew,” megumi says, crossing his arms, then doing it again. “i don’t care about them. they don’t care about me.” 

“well, i don’t know that—“ 

“no. you and y/n took us in and they didn’t care. so why should i?” 

“right.” gojo nods. “right we… took you in.” 

megumi nods, as a finality, and then deflates a little bit. 

he doesn’t care about his mom—whoever she is, wherever she might be. he doesn’t. he just… also doesn’t want to replace her. 

it feels wrong to think about. she doesn’t care about his life, so why should he care about hers? 

it's a stupid sort of guilt. if tsumiki said anything like it, megumi wouldn't talk to her for a week. 

but it's the sort of guilt over you, and a woman he knows nothing about. someone he doesn't really want to know about. 

maybe that makes it worse. 

“did someone say something at school?” 

megumi frowns. “no. why would they?” 

gojo shrugs. “kids are jerks,” he answers, simply, and then mutters “i would know…” under his breath, making megumi want to punch him again. 

“no one said anything.” 

“then why were you crying this morning?” 

“i wasn’t crying.” 

“hey,” gojo frowns. “crying is fine. it’s good.” 

“i know,” megumi crosses his arms. 

“okay, then.” 

megumi doesn’t even know why he wanted to talk to gojo in the first place. 

“look,” gojo sighs, his fingers tapping along the body of the chair. he whispers something that sounds suspiciously like “y/n is so much better at this,” and then meets megumi’s eyes—metaphorically, of course. everyone knows that gojo doesn’t have any eyes. “if you want to talk about your parents, we can talk about them. tsumiki asks questions every once in a while. and…” he breaks away, shaking his head. “if there’s something i don’t know, then i'll—we’ll figure it out. i’ve got eyes everywhere.” 

gojo is grinning at his little joke, but megumi’s frown deepens. 

"i don't care about them," he says, again, as a reassurance to them both. 

"they are your parents, you know?" he holds his hands up in defense, probably from the glare megumi is giving him. "i'm just saying. curiosity is normal." 

"how would you know?" 

gojo sighs, tilting his head back. he looks almost hurt. "i'm wise. i've got years of experience on you." 

"no, you don't." 

he shakes his head. "now i'm going to start crying." 

megumi stares at him. if he could trade gojo for literally anyone else in the world, he would. 

and yet, he doesn't want to talk to you about this. he doesn't want to talk at all. and he does. 

at least he knows that gojo won’t take any of this too seriously. that he won’t get to the bottom of the problem, like neither of them wants.

"do you think..." megumi starts, whispering. "do you ever regret taking us in?" 

gojo swallows. he looks almost hesitant to answer, but megumi knows that must be wrong. gojo has never hesitated a moment in his life.

"well, you guys are pretty mean to me. but no, we don't regret it. why would we?" he asks, teasing, like always. "children are for chores." 

megumi shakes his head. 

"you should--" gojo scrunches his nose. "i can get y/n. she's got better answers, anyway." 

"no!" megumi holds his hand out when the man begins to move from the chair, heart racing. "i don't want to talk to her." 

"did something happen with you guys? you think someone might mention it to me..." 

"no, nothing happened. i just... want to talk to you." 

gojo snorts, but he sits back down. "whatever you did, i'm sure it's not that bad. remember that time i set tsumiki's hair on fire when she was gone? that was bad." 

"i didn’t do anything. i'm not like you," megumi scowls, looking away. 

"would you like a reward?" gojo asks, dryly. "most people wouldn't openly admit that. i admire your confidence." 

both of them are silent, megumi considering the consequences of just saying the words out loud, nonetheless to gojo--who definitely won't know what to do with them. 

after a minute, gojo clears his throat. "okay, megumi. my turn. do you regret coming here with me? instead of going with your family? you'd be clan head someday, you know." 

"that place with the freaky shed of weapons you showed me?" 

"yup." 

"no," megumi doesn't have to think about that. "tsumiki's with me here. and i--"

i like it here, he almost slips. i love you guys.

megumi sighs. he doesn't want to say that to gojo. 

but the older man looks like he already knew what he meant, a dumb smile on his face. "good. okay. well, i don't know what's wrong with you," he gives megumi a pointed look, saying that he actually does. "but i'm sure it'll all work out. you've got me here, so there's nothing to worry about. and y/n would kill me if anything happened to you, so. don't worry about your parents, kid." 

megumi blinks at him. because his problems can be summed up with a quick "yeah, that's cool." 

he rolls his eyes. 

gojo's hand nudges his knee. "you can still ask if you want. anytime. we love you, you know? y/n more than me, but still..." 

megumi shakes his head. "well i love her more than you." 

"good. tsumiki's my favorite anyway." 

"good. she's the only one who can deal with you." 

"good," gojo retorts, like a child. 

he leans in, ruffling megumi's hair as he does it. "even if you are pretty annoying, i'll still do some research for you. see about your mom." 

"you don't have to--" 

"i can't pick you up every time you're crying in class," gojo shrugs, so simply. definitely a joke in the words, but no teasing. "and i won't tell y/n. but you should talk to her. she worries." 

"i know." 

gojo smiles. "okay. as long as you know." 

the two of them sit there for a while more, gojo making an awful comment every couple of lapses in silence, megumi answering with an equally sarcastic retort, and the two of them not minding at all. 

and megumi still can't get the question out--are you his mom?--but there's the undeinable feeling that no one else can answer it for him anyway. 

and gojo seems to know that, so he doesn't say anything about it. just lingers there, like an illness, waiting until megumi is okay, or maybe waiting for him to ask something else. 

even though megumi doesn’t want to give the man any credit, he knows that gojo understands a lot more than he lets on. and, just from the weird little prideful looks he gives him every time he says something, megumi knows that he probably gets what this is about.

but if gojo isn’t going to say anything, then neither is he.

still, it’s nice to have him here.

there’s no comforting glances, or squeezing of hands with gojo. no acute words and adept gestures.

megumi has never expected gojo to overcome his tendency towards immaturity, or to become something that he’s simply not.

but there is just this. just the man who’s been there for long enough for megumi to notice. to understand that he’s not going away so easily.

and it’s nice to have you both. (megumi won’t admit that the gratitude he has for his makeshift parents is much stronger, more vehement than any worry about biology, or being left behind).

eventually, megumi's eyes begin to droop, and even though his headache is less stress-induced, it's still there, a gentle pounding at his skull. 

like a reminder that things are going to change, even if he doesn't want them to. that he's growing up, and he can't protect everyone from his emotions forever. 

but megumi doesn't have enough energy to think about it. so he lays down against his pillows, eyelids fluttering open and closed. 

and he can just see it when gojo sneaks out of the room, whistling softly as he leaves, purposefully leaving the door open. 

megumi should've gone to live with that clan. 

*

"hey," you stand from your chair, looking not at satoru, but behind him, like the essence of their conversation is going to follow him through the door. "what'd he want? is he okay?" 

you dance on your feet awkwardly, looking like you were waiting that whole time (you were). 

satoru smiles, leaning on the counter to stare at you, at your nervous little lip bite. "he's fine." 

"is he feeling really sick? he told me he didn't want any medicine, but if he's got a headache or something, then i could give him a pain reliever. did he seem bad? should we take him to the doctor? i can probably schedule an appointment--" 

you're cut off by satoru as he nears you, crushing you against his chest in a hug so tight that it knocks the air from your lungs. 

seriously, jujutsu sorcerers and their sheer amount of muscle training are ridiculous. 

"satoru--" you squeeze out, but he holds you even tighter. 

"it's all good," he says like it's an answer, and he sounds like he knows something that you don't. probably because he does. 

but after a moment you relax into him. even if you have to bribe him with cuddles, someone's going to tell you what's going on... 

*

next part | series masterlist

[hannieehaee]

them accidentally ditching you on your bday pt. 2 - hhu

content: angsty, gender neutral, established relationship, conflict resolution, direct continuation to this, fluff, happy ending, etc.

part 1

wc: 3889

a/n: literally so many ppl requested thisjhdf im glad u guys liked it!! im working on vu and pu versions for this rn btw <3

masterlist

seungcheol -

seungcheol sat there for a minute or so, simply pondering at what had just happened. it was 100% his fault, that was something he was very well aware of. he knew that it had simply slipped his mind, but that did not wipe away the hurt he saw in your eyes upon entering your shared apartment. knowing that you had been waiting for him all day made him feel like an asshole. he couldn't believe that he had forgotten about your birthday even upon coming home at midnight the night prior. he felt like such a hypocrite, always whining at people to give him royalty treatment on his birthday but absolutely ignoring you during yours. you, his most favorite person.

he felt hurt that you had decided to spend the night with some friends, instead of in the arms of your boyfriend, but he understood. this was what he deserved. god knew that he wouldve pulled out all the dramatics if you had done the same to him, which was why he was now at a standstill, not knowing what he should do. he wanted to see you so badly, get on his knees and apologize, letting you know over and over again that you were the most vital person in his life and that forgetting you was something that not even he could forgive himself for.

now, he could've sat there and lamented himself over his stupid mistake, or he could run after you before you made it out of the building. he did not want you going to bed angry, or much worse, sad, so he picked the latter and got off his ass to chase after you, not caring about his current exhaustion as he took the stairs rather than the elevator in order to be able to catch up to you before you made it to your car.

luckily for him, he was able to catch you just as you stepped out of the elevator (having ran down five flights of stairs and almost injuring himself in the process), completely unsuspecting to his sudden ambush. he hadn't noticed until now, but you had dressed up, clearly ready to go clubbing or partying with your friends. he felt bad to get in the way of your plans. no, he felt horrible to accidentally ditch you and then ruin your plans. but he needed to at least try and make amends. he knew that if this were him, he'd want you to try and make it up to him.

you jumped back a bit at seungcheol's sudden apparition as you rounded the corner upon exiting the elevator, seemingly not having expected him to come after you.

"cheol, what are you doing?", you didn't seem mad, but your tone let him know you were clearly not content with him.

okay, he didn't think as far as this. his main goal was just to convince you to stay, then he would come up with a way to make it up to you.

"baby, i ... i'm so sorry. i know how hypocritical this is coming from me. i never meant to forget, you know that! there's nothing i can do to make up for having forgotten about you today, but please, please let me try."

"cheol .. i don't know," you paused, "last year when i texted you at 12:03 you complained about it for over an hour. you're the one always making a big deal about this. i assumed you'd care when the shoe was on your foot, but apparently not."

"i do! i do care. baby, please. let me take you out. ditch your friends. i'll take you somewhere. anywhere. i'll even take you out tomorrow too! i'll take the day off. how does that sound?"

"you cant take the day off, cheol. you're an idol-"

"i dont care! they can come and try to drag me away from you if they want. i want to be with you. please let me. please don't leave. cant stand the thought of you going to sleep alone after what i did."

you chuckled at the first half of his statement, feeling touched at the second part of it.

"are you sure?"

he scoffed, deciding to go on a leap and hold onto your hands, pulling you closer to him, "yes! there's nothing i wanted to do more today than be with you! it mightve slipped my mind that today was the day, but i had a beautiful day for us planned, baby. will you let me show you? please?"

cheol knew it was hard for you to say no to him, specially when he whined and pouted at you, giving you his best performance in order for you to understand how badly he felt. it didn't take much more for you to break, finally letting a smile graced your face as you squeezed his hands in yours.

"you better make this worth my while, choi seungcheol," god, he hated when anyone called him that, but you were the exception.

"always."

wonwoo -

wonwoo was astonished at himself, for lack of a better word. he had never been more disappointed in himself than in this moment. sure, he didn't take birthdays too seriously, and he knew you didn't either, but you always made him feel so special on his day he had only wanted to do the same. he was a lowkey guy, so his ways of showing love sometimes went unnoticed by most people, except for you. you accepted the subtlety of his love, loving him all the more for it. he felt terrible that today he showed you the exact opposite of what he had planned. he had taken weeks to perfect the dinner he had wanted to make for you, having prepared a romantic night for the two of you. all he wanted was to make you feel loved as he held you through the night, but his plan had stupidly slipped his mind.

what kind of asshole ditches their significant other on their birthday? for a stupid video game out of all things? as soon as wonwoo communicated what you had texted him to mingyu, his roommate couldn't help but scold him, telling him this was very uncharacteristic of him. which it was. everyone knew wonwoo to be a very sensible guy. it was very rare for anyone to have their feelings hurt by wonwoo. the guy was just simply too emotionally intelligent to ever be perceived as a hurtful individual. except now he had shown a careless part of himself that rarely ever faced the surface.

he was unsure of what to do. it was clear by your messages that you did not want to see him. you quite literally had asked him to not come. your texts to him were always filled with love, somehow being able to have your affections to him transcend even through text. but these were cold, and with good reason. still, wonwoo did not want to give up. the only thing that would be worse than ditching you on your birthday would be to stay where he was, knowing you were not only upset but also hurt by his actions. or rather, lack there of.

so, wonwoo was now on his way to you. well, to your apartment. you had mentioned in your messages that you would be out with friends due to his absence. it killed him that you had chosen to be with your friends over him, but he was fully aware that he only had himself to blame for that. he was glad you at least had someone to be with while his forgetfulness kept him away from you.

he had a key to your apartment, often heading over to fall asleep in your arms after a grueling day of being an idol. upon arriving there, he knew you'd be gone, so he allowed himself in, hauling in all the ingredients he had packed with him in order to make you the dinner he had been planning all these weeks. he was unsure of when you'd arrive back home, so he needed to hurry just in case. there was also a chance you'd come back in the early hours of the morning, knowing you would sometimes stay out with your friends til 1 or 2 in the am. having practiced this dinner multiple times, wonwoo was able to have it all done by 10, hoping that you'd arrive soon so the dinner wouldn't go to waste. he took care of the ambience, lighting candles and even moving furniture aside to make space for his set up. all he had to do now was wait for your arrival.

it had taken you around two hours to arrive. wonwoo had simply sat there waiting for you, not wanting to contact you as to not disturb you. okay, maybe he had maniacally texted you back earlier, apologizing for his mistake over and over, but had received no response, so he had decided it'd be best to just wait for you to arrive on your own. and now you were here, crossing the door to your apartment.

you stopped upon spotting him, widening your eyes before taking note of the dinner table behind him, "wonwoo? what are you doing here?"

he smiled sadly at you, slightly unsure of what to say, "i cooked for you," he paused, continuing upon seeing your confusion, "im so sorry. time got the best of me. i cant believe it slipped my mind. i knew it was today, but i got too distracted. i never wanted to make you feel like i didnt care. i do. so much."

you stood there without saying anything, still carrying a slightly shocked expression on your face. so he continued.

"baby ... please, have a meal with me. i prepared all this for you. this is what i had planned for today, if only i hadnt forgotten. let me make it up to you, please. i already called off tomorrow. i had a whole day planned for us, but i'll do whatever you want. if you want me to leave, i will. just, please. i need you to know how much i care. i love you, you're everything."

you continued to stare at him for a bit, a soft smile slowly breaking into your features before responding.

"nonu .. you didn't have to do all this. i'm sorry if i made you worry. this is ... it's such a sweet gesture. of course i want you to stay. all i wanted all day was to be with you," it melted his heart that you had wanted him all day, but were separated by none other than himself.

he pulled you into his arms halfway through your response, humming as he felt you hug him back. nothing felt as nice as your touch against his.

"im so sorry, beautiful. this will never happen again, i promise."

"i love you, wonwoo. thank you."

"happy birthday."

mingyu -

mingyu had never hauled ass quicker than at that moment, not even bothering to say goodbye to his roommate before grabbing a jacket and sprinting out of the door.

he couldn't believe his behavior towards you. you had always been a top priority to him, and to now realize he had forgotten your birthday gutted him tremendously. but what got to him even more was the knowledge that you had probably been waiting all day for him, having agreed beforehand that he would make space for you on your special day even through his packed comeback schedule. the sole thought that you, the bestest person he had ever met, had sat alone waiting for him all day, made him feel like the worst boyfriend. so now he was quite literally running in order to get to you.

the dryness of your voice during that call should've been the first hint that something was wrong, but what really made the alarms go off in his head was your lack of response when he said 'i love you' to you. mingyu knew it was dumb to care so much about it, but he thrived off words of affirmation, so your lack of response made him immediately assume something was wrong. you had never not reciprocated his words of affection, much less hung up on him. the moment he expressed his concerns to wonwoo, he was reminded by his roommate that 'oh wait, isn't it their birthday this week?' suddenly his mind started spiraling, now remembering that he had forgotten his boyfriend duties on the most important day.

it didn't take him too long to get to your apartment. okay, he didn't actually run there, he was just being a tad bit dramatic. but dramatics were necessary in this situation, which is why the moment you begrudgingly opened the door after his incessant knocks, allowing him inside, he immediately dropped to his knees, looking up at you as he rambled apologies at you.

"baby, i'm so fucking sorry. god, i don't know how i forgot. i swear the day just slipped my mind. i had plans ready, i swear! i've just been so busy with the comeback- not that that's an excuse! you have every reason to be mad at me. it won't happen again, i promise, i-" mingyu wasn't sure when exactly he was going to stop listing off constant apologies to you. he wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying at this point, just repeating himself over and over again, letting it slip past him that you were now standing above him, holding in your amusement at the state of the pleading man before you.

"mingyu, please get up."

like an obedient boy, he got up, now towering over you as he usually did. he immediately held onto your hands, bringing them up to his chest as he continued his apologies.

"you have every right to be mad at me. i neglected you and forgot about you when i shouldn't have. i didn't even wanna come home to wonwoo tonight! i wanted to come to you! but we have a schedule early tomorrow morning, so it was just easier. but i'll cancel! i'll stay here with you! i wanna make it up to you-"

"mingyu, shut up!"

that was enough for him to slam his mouth shut immediately, looking at you as he waited for your next command words.

"mingyu, listen. i understand. i was hurt you forgot, but i understand you're really busy right now, okay? i'm not angry at you. you don't have to cancel your schedule either. i don't want to get in the way of-"

"i'll do it! you're my top priority, baby. you know that."

"i still don't want you to cancel, gyu. it's fine. i'm not angry. i appreciate your apology. just wanted to be with you today .. i'm sorry if i made you worry," you looked down, almost as if embarrassed by having felt hurt by his actions. this made mingyu melt with guilt.

"no, baby. fuck. how can i make this up to you? can i stay here tonight? hmm? i'll cook you dinner and wake you up with breakfast. i'll even cut my schedule short for tomorrow so i can be back home with you earlier. how's that sound?"

"sounds perfect mingyu, thank you," he took this as confirmation to finally hold you in his arms, swaying you back and forth as he hummed the birthday song lightly against your ear, causing you to giggle against him.

vernon -

everyone was aware that vernon could sometimes be a little too chill for his own good. he didn't make too big of a deal about most things, simply going with the flow and allowing things to evolve on their own. except that could not be done in this situation. right now, he needed to make a choice. give you your space, or run home to you, tail between his legs as he apologized for ever having forgotten about you. the last thing vernon would ever want was for you to not feel the immense amount of love he's always had for you. he knew he could be bad at showing it sometimes, but you were the absolute love of his life, which made him feel devastated over and over again as he kept rereading your texts.

'maybe you should stay at the dorms tonight. not really in the mood for you to spend the night. im sorry. love you.' that was what you had last sent to him exactly thirty-eight minutes ago. how could he just sit with that for the rest of the night? specially when all he wanted to do was be with you and hold you and kiss you and show you how incredibly obsessed with you he was. he was never good with dates, but he had always gotten any and all dates pertaining to you right thus far. he even had a gift for you he had purchased a few months back, but he had stupidly forgotten the day he had been preparing for was this week. this mistake was an outlier, truly, but it hurt you nonetheless, which was all vernon cared about at the moment. he couldn't believe you'd been having to hint at your birthday while your boyfriend remained clueless. you must've felt so dejected. he winced at the thought.

however, right now was not a time for lamentations. even if you kicked him out and told him to get fucked, vernon had to at least try to come home to you now. he quickly went over the situation with his members, explaining that he had been a total douchebag and neglected you. that earned him scoldings from all members present, calling him all types of names and demanding he head over to your apartment right this instant to beg for forgiveness and hope you wouldn't just send him right back.

so now he was on his way to you, despite you having instructed him to stay away. he wanted to respect your wishes, but he couldn't go to sleep tonight knowing your heart was still hurt because of him. he needed to at least see you and have you know that he was willing to try and mend things. vernon wasn't one for public displays, nor was he one for dramatics, but he was willing to pull all stops for you if it meant you'd forgive him. which was why he was currently running through the hybe hallways as he called up his driver to be ready to take him to your apartment as soon as he reached the parking lot.

he had had time to think over a game plan on the way over, except nothing came to mind. the two of you had never fought before. sure, there had been a few minuscule spats here and there, but he had never seen you angry at him before; he'd never given any reason to be until now. he didn't want to freak out over this, but knew how hurtful it must've been for you to feel so neglected by the person who's supposed to love you most, so he felt a pit in his stomach with the worry that maybe this would be enough for you to finally snap at his forgetful tendencies and end it. he didn't have much time to think about this, however, as he now stood in front of your apartment door, fearful of knocking on it.

the decision to open the door was made for him, as you incidentally opened it yourself, yelping at his apparition on the other side of it.

"vernon? what are you doing here?", you didn't seem angry. you seemed more confused at his presence. that was good.

"i- uh ... i'm sorry."

okay, kind of a bad start.

"vernon. i told you not to come over tonight. i'm sorry, i'm not really in the mood to see you right now," even though you didn't appear angry, your eyes wouldn't meet his, making him deflate a bit.

"are you mad at me? i'm so sorry. i didnt mean to forget, i swear," vernon knew there wasn't much he could say past that, but he wanted you to at least know he regretted his neglect.

"i'm not angry, vernon. i'm just a little ... sad. i tried to be subtle about it. i mean, i dont even care for my birthday that much, but i hoped my boyfriend would at least remember it."

"baby, god. i am so fucking sorry. i never meant to make you feel like i didn't care. it just slipped my mind. i know it's not a valid excuse, but i need you to know that it doesnt mean anything. i'm just a fucking idiot. i'm sorry."

he was rambling now. somehow you being hurt by him trumped the chance of you being mad.

"vernon, it's fine. i dont want you beating yourself up about it. i'll get over it. i just need space tonight. i was about to go meet with a friend before you got here," you seemed like you just wanted to get out of the situation, clearly feeling awkward at even expressing your disappointment at him. it made vernon feel like even more of an asshole.

"no! be mad! you shouldn't get over it. i should be making it up to you. stay. please. i'll do anything you want. i'll take tomorrow off. we can do something together. anything you want. i have a gift for you and everything! i got it while in japan, the date just slipped my mind, i swear. please stay. i don't want to leave you alone if i made you sad. please."

"vernon ..."

"please. i don't want to force you. if you want to leave, i'll accept it, but let me make it up to you. i dont want you to feel like i dont care. i do. i know i dont express it much, that's on me. i'll make it known. i'll show you. i don't want to hurt you again, i-"

he was unable to finish his sentence, now stumbling back due to a sudden weight against him. you, with your arms now wrapped around him as your face nuzzled his neck. he instinctively wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you in as he lowered his head to breathe you in, humming as he felt the relief of having you in his hold.

you pulled away too quickly for his liking, eyes slightly glossy but not enough to consider it worrisome, "i forgive you. i'm sorry, i didn't mean to exaggerate. i did feel neglected, but-"

"but nothing. don't apologize, please. this won't happen again, okay? i love you."

"i love you too," you smiled at him before pausing, "i .. do you wanna come in?", you seemed a bit sheepish, probably feeling awkward at hearing vernon ramble apologies at you for the past five minutes, showing way more emotion than he usually did.

"come in? oh, you're not leaving? wait, don't answer that. yes," he held onto your hand before you could say anything, pulling you in for a quick kiss before leading you into your apartment, all under the promise to make up for his previous carelessness and never make you doubt his affections for you ever again.

[alyrasturnz]

i need an angsty matt "i miss you im sorry" fic from you!

 ‎‎ I MISS YOU, I’M SORRY

❐ summary » matt and y/n, in the heat of a fierce argument, carelessly discarded their relationship as if it held no significance. it was only in the quiet moments of absence and longing that they came to understand the true value of what they had lost.

❐ pairings » bf!matt x fem!reader

❐ warnings » angst (happy ending), smashing plates, argument (resolved), lowkey toxic relationship

❐ a/n && w/c » i forgot to post and ended up playing imsg games 😁 • 3.34k

the apartment, once a haven of shared dreams and whispered promises, now felt like a battlefield scarred by countless unspoken words and unresolved conflicts.

the air was thick with a palpable tension, a suffocating weight that had been accumulating over days, weeks, perhaps even months. each corner of the room seemed to echo with the ghosts of happier times, now overshadowed by the looming presence of inevitable change.

you stood by the kitchen counter, your hands trembling slightly as you tried to steady yourself. the cool surface beneath your fingertips offered little comfort, a stark contrast to the storm raging within.

every breath felt labored, each heartbeat echoing like a drum in the silence, as if the very walls were closing in, bearing witness to your inner turmoil. the weight of unspoken words and unresolved emotions pressed down on you, making the simple act of standing a monumental task. "matt, we need to talk about this. we can't keep pretending everything is fine."

matt paced the room, his frustration palpable. each step he took seemed to reverberate through the floorboards, a testament to the storm brewing inside him. his movements were restless, almost frantic, as if he were a caged animal seeking an escape.

the furrow in his brow deepened with every pass, and his clenched fists betrayed the intensity of his inner struggle. the air around him crackled with unspoken tension, a silent cry for resolution in a world that seemed to offer none. "talk? what good is talking, y/n? we've been talking for months, and look where it's gotten us!" his voice was a mixture of anger and desperation.

your eyes welled up with tears, but you refused to let them fall. the sting of unshed tears blurred your vision, creating a shimmering veil that only heightened the emotional turmoil within.

each blink was a battle, a desperate attempt to maintain composure in the face of overwhelming sorrow. the lump in your throat grew tighter, a silent testament to the strength it took to hold back the flood of emotions threatening to break free.

the weight of unspoken words and suppressed feelings pressed heavily on your chest, making every breath a conscious effort. "i just want us to be happy again. i want us to find a way back to each other."

matt stopped pacing and turned to face you, his eyes burning with disappointment. the intensity of his gaze felt like a scorching flame, searing through the fragile veneer of your composure.

his movements, once restless, now stilled with a gravity that seemed to pull the very air from the room. the silence that followed was heavy, laden with the weight of unspoken accusations and shattered expectations.

his expression, a complex tapestry of hurt and frustration, spoke volumes more than words ever could, leaving you to grapple with the raw, unfiltered emotion that hung between you like a dark cloud. "happy? how can we be happy when every day feels like a struggle? when every conversation turns into a fight?" his voice cracked, revealing the depth of his pain.

you took a step closer, reaching out a hand. the distance between you seemed to shrink and expand all at once, each movement laden with a mix of hope and trepidation. your hand, trembling slightly, extended like a lifeline through the charged atmosphere, a silent plea for connection amidst the storm of emotions.

the space between you crackled with unspoken words and unresolved tension, every inch forward a testament to your courage and vulnerability. the soft, hesitant gesture carried the weight of a thousand unsaid apologies and a yearning for solace, bridging the chasm that had grown between your hearts. "matt, please. we can work through this. we just need to try."

but matt's frustration boiled over. in a sudden, impulsive movement, he grabbed a plate from the counter and hurled it against the wall. the sound of shattering porcelain echoed through the apartment, a stark contrast to the silence that followed.

his face contorted with rage and despair, each shard of the broken plate reflecting the fragments of his shattered composure. the violent act seemed to hang in the air, a tangible manifestation of the turmoil within him. the silence that ensued was thick, almost suffocating, as if the very walls held their breath, bearing witness to the raw, unfiltered outburst of emotion.

"try? i'm tired of trying! i'm tired of feeling like i'm never enough for you!" his voice was raw, filled with years of pent-up emotion.

you flinched at the sound of the breaking dish, your heart breaking a little more with each piece that hit the floor. the sharp, jarring noise seemed to pierce through your very soul, each fragment of porcelain a painful reminder of the fractured bond between you.

your body instinctively recoiled, as if attempting to shield itself from the emotional shrapnel. the room felt colder, the air heavier, as the gravity of the moment settled upon you.

the delicate dance of hope and despair played out in the silence that followed, each heartbeat echoing the silent plea for reconciliation amidst the chaos. "matt, it's not about you being enough. it's about us finding a way to be enough for each other."

matt's shoulders slumped, the anger giving way to a deep, aching disappointment. "i just... i don't know if we can, y/n. i don't know if we have anything left to give."

you stepped closer, your voice soft but determined. the space between you seemed to pulse with unspoken words and unresolved tension, each step forward a testament to your resolve.

"we do, matt. we have love. and maybe that's enough to start with." your voice, though gentle, carried the weight of your emotions, a delicate blend of compassion and unwavering strength.

the air around you thickened, charged with the intensity of the moment, as your words sought to bridge the chasm that had grown between you. every syllable was a lifeline, a beacon of hope amidst the storm of emotions, striving to pierce through the fog of misunderstanding and reach the heart that had turned away.

the room fell silent again, the shattered pieces of your argument lying on the floor, waiting to be picked up. the air was heavy with the remnants of harsh words and unspoken truths, each fragment a testament to the intensity of your clash.

as matt looked into your eyes, he saw a glimmer of hope, a small but powerful reminder of why you had fought so hard to begin with.

that flicker of light, amidst the ruins of your dispute, held the promise of reconciliation and the enduring strength of your bond. it was a silent acknowledgment that beneath the storm lay a foundation built on love and resilience, ready to be mended and made whole once more.

the apartment, heavy with the weight of unsaid words, seemed to close in around you both. the silence was deafening, broken only by the distant hum of the city outside. the walls, once a sanctuary, now felt like a cage, trapping the lingering tension between you.

the oppressive quiet pressed down, amplifying the unspoken emotions that hung in the air. every creak of the floorboards, every distant car horn, seemed to underscore the vast chasm that had opened up between you. the city’s distant murmur was a cruel reminder of the world continuing on, indifferent to the turmoil within these four walls, where the echoes of your silence spoke volumes.

matt took a deep breath, his eyes searching yours for something he could no longer find. "y/n... i don't think i can do this anymore."

your heart skipped a beat, a cold wave of fear washing over you. "what do you mean, matt? we can still fix this. we just need time."

he shook his head, his expression one of resigned sorrow. "it's not about time. it's about realizing that sometimes, love isn't enough. we've tried, and we've fought, but it's only made things worse."

tears streamed down your face now, unchecked and unstoppable. "so, what are you saying? that we should just give up? throw everything away?"

matt's voice was barely above a whisper, each word a dagger to your heart. "i think it's time we let each other go. maybe then, we can find the happiness we've been searching for, even if it's not together."

you felt the ground shift beneath you, the foundation of your world crumbling. "matt, please... don't do this. we can still find a way."

he stepped forward, gently cupping your face in his hands. "i'll always love you, you. but sometimes, love means knowing when to walk away. it's the hardest thing i've ever had to do, but i think it's the right thing."

you closed your eyes, leaning into his touch one last time. "i don't know how to say goodbye."

matt pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, his own tears mingling with yours. "neither do i. but maybe, this isn't goodbye. maybe it's just... see you later."

with that, he turned and walked towards the door, each step echoing the finality of his decision. you stood there, watching him leave, your heart shattering into pieces as the door closed behind him.

the apartment, once filled with dreams and laughter, now felt like a hollow shell. and as you sank to the floor, sobbing, you realized that sometimes, the hardest battles are the ones we fight within ourselves.

you took a deep breath, trying to steady the tumultuous emotions raging within. the apartment, once your sanctuary, now felt like a battlefield, each corner echoing with memories of happier times now overshadowed by the present conflict.

the weight of unspoken words pressed down on you, making it hard to breathe. the air was thick with tension, a palpable force that seemed to wrap around your chest, squeezing tighter with each passing second.

»--•--«

it had been exactly three months since the breakup with matt, and to say you weren’t doing the best would be an understatement. the days had blurred into a monotonous haze, each one a silent testament to the void he had left behind.

your heart, once a vibrant tapestry of shared dreams and whispered promises, now felt like a barren landscape, yearning for the rain that never came.

you've sought solace in the offices of every therapist in town, but nothing seemed to mend the wounds like matt's warm embrace and gentle words once did.

each session felt like a hollow echo, lacking the comfort and reassurance that his presence had effortlessly provided. his praises and tender whispers had been a balm to your soul, something no amount of clinical advice could replicate.

all you needed was him. you missed him with an ache that words could scarcely capture, and you were prepared to move mountains, to traverse deserts of doubt and uncertainty, to do everything in your power to bring him back into your life. the void left by his absence was a chasm you were determined to bridge, no matter the cost.

you rose from your bed, hastily donning the first outfit that came to hand, a sense of urgency propelling your every movement.

you walked out of your room, the quiet hum of the house enveloping you, and as you passed by the kitchen, an inadvertent misstep brought a sharp, searing pain—your foot had found an errant glass shard, hidden in the shadows of your hurry.

you glanced downward, your gaze locking onto the shattered remnants of the plate. kneeling slowly, you gingerly picked up the broken piece, the jagged edges a cruel reminder of fragility. as you held it, tears welled up in your eyes, the weight of the moment pressing down upon you.

you found yourself paralyzed, unable to muster the will to clean it up. it wasn't just a broken plate; it was the last thing of yours that matt had touched. the memory of his hands, once so familiar and warm, now felt like a ghostly presence, making the task feel insurmountable.

it wasn't exactly a symbol of innocence, but it somehow tethered you to the very notion of it. his touch, now a distant memory, evoked a sense of purity and untainted moments, a stark contrast to the complexity of your emotions. the only thing his touch would ever remind you of was innocence, a fleeting whisper of simpler times.

you sighed deeply, the weight of your emotions pressing down on your chest. rising slowly, you let the shard of glass slip from your fingers, watching as it fell to the ground with a muted clink. as you walked out of your apartment, each step felt like a departure from a chapter you weren't ready to close.

the ride down in the elevator was excruciatingly silent, a void filled with the echoes of your thoughts. you rarely took the elevator; it was an unspoken rule. you and matt would always opt for the stairs, his aversion to the confined space of the elevator a shared quirk that now felt like a distant memory.

as soon as the elevator doors parted with a soft chime, you stepped out into the dimly lit corridor. the tears clung to your lashes, and with a trembling hand, you wiped them away, each step towards your car feeling heavy with the weight of unspoken sorrow.

you slipped into the driver's seat, the familiar scent of the car mingling with your tumultuous thoughts. as you gripped the steering wheel, you found yourself lost in contemplation, the myriad of choices and their consequences swirling in your mind before you finally turned the key in the ignition.

his house lay but a short distance from your apartment, a fortunate proximity given the haze of your thoughts. before you could fully grasp the passage of time, you found yourself already at his doorstep, the journey a blur of fleeting moments.

you pulled into his driveway, the gravel crunching softly beneath your tires as you came to a stop. after parking your car, you stepped out, the cool night air brushing against your skin as you made your way towards the doorstep, each step echoing with anticipation.

you stood there, the weight of the moment pressing down on you, as you exhaled a shaky breath. with a sense of trepidation, you slowly raised your hand, each movement deliberate, and finally pressed the doorbell, the sound resonating through the stillness.

you stood in silence, the seconds stretching into an eternity, as the unanswered doorbell echoed in the stillness. the quiet seemed to amplify your anticipation, each moment passing without a response heightening the tension in the air.

perhaps they weren't home, the house standing silent and unyielding. perhaps now was not the opportune moment, the timing of your arrival misaligned with the currents of fate.

you shook your head, a sigh escaping your lips as you turned to walk away. just then, the door swung open with a suddenness that caught you off guard, halting your retreat and pulling you back into the moment.

your head turned, drawn by an invisible force, towards the silhouette standing in the doorway, its form outlined by the soft glow of light spilling from within.

matt.

he himself appeared far from well, his visage marked by deep, shadowy bags under his eyes, a stark testament to sleepless nights. his hair, a tangled mess, seemed to have been untouched by a comb for days, each strand standing in chaotic rebellion. his overall demeanor exuded a sense of weariness, as though the weight of countless burdens had etched themselves into his very being.

“y/n?” he whispered, his voice a mere breath of sound, like the rustling of leaves in a distant forest, barely audible yet laden with unspoken emotions and hidden depths.

“matt," you began, your voice barely a whisper, “i’m so sorry. i miss you so much.” the words felt heavy, laden with the regret and sorrow that had been building up inside you. “i know talking seems pointless right now, but i can’t do this alone.”

matt's gaze, intense and unyielding, bore into yours, as if trying to unravel the depths of your soul with each passing second. the melancholy in his gaze was almost too much to bear, but you pressed on. “i know i’ve made mistakes, and i know i’ve hurt you. the tension between us, the unresolved conflicts... it's all my fault. i let my fears and insecurities get the better of me, and i pushed you away when i should have been holding you closer."

your voice wavered, but you forced yourself to continue. “i miss the way we used to be, the way we could talk about anything and everything. i miss the laughter, the shared dreams, and the whispered promises. but most of all, i miss you. the real you, the one who loves me despite my flaws."

tears threatened to spill over, but you blinked them back, determined to stay strong. “i want to fix this, matt. i want to work through our problems and come out stronger on the other side. i know it won't be easy, and i know it will take time, but i’m willing to do whatever it takes. please, give us another chance."

you reached out, your hand trembling as it found his. the touch was tentative, a fragile bridge between your hearts. “i love you, matt. and I believe we can get through this, together. we just need to take that first step, to start healing the wounds we've inflicted on each other."

in that moment, the vast expanse of the world seemed to dissolve, leaving only the two of you suspended in a timeless void, teetering on the precipice of a new beginning. the universe held its breath, as if acknowledging the profound significance of this fragile, yet pivotal, instant.

matt's eyes softened, the fiery anger slowly dissolving into a deep, aching sadness that mirrored the storm within your own heart. he took a tentative step closer, his movements deliberate and filled with unspoken emotion. his hand, trembling slightly, reached up to gently cup your cheek, his touch a tender balm against the raw wounds of your shared past.

the warmth of his skin sent a shiver cascading down your spine, a poignant reminder of the undeniable connection that still pulsed between you, fragile yet unbroken.

"i miss you too," he murmured, his voice a mere whisper carried on the fragile wings of a sigh. "i miss us. but we can’t continue this cycle of pain and sorrow, tearing each other apart with every step we take."

his words hung in the air, a delicate truce between your aching hearts. you nodded, the tears finally spilling over like a long-awaited rain, as you leaned into his touch, seeking solace in the warmth of his hand. "i know," you whispered, your voice trembling with both hope and fear, "but we can change. we can learn from this and grow stronger together, like two trees whose roots intertwine, supporting each other through every storm."

matt's other hand found yours, fingers intertwining in a silent promise that spoke volumes. "let's take it one day at a time," he said, his voice steadier now, a newfound resolve coloring his words. "let's rebuild what we've lost, piece by precious piece, like artisans restoring a shattered mosaic to its former glory."

you nodded again, a glimmer of hope sparking in your chest like the first light of dawn. "one day at a time," you agreed, your voice filled with determination and resolve. "we'll get through this, together, like travelers navigating the winding paths of a dense forest, finding our way back to the light."

in that moment, the world seemed to exhale, the tension easing as you both took the first tentative steps toward healing. the journey ahead would undoubtedly be long and fraught with challenges, but with each other's unwavering support, you felt a newfound strength. together, you could overcome any obstacle, like two weary travelers finding solace in each other's presence as they navigate the treacherous terrain of life.

[bookishbrewer]

Cyn - The Disabled Neurodivergent Sibling:

⚠️ WARNING: this post will include discussion of bullying, ableism of numerous kinds, abuse, trauma.

First, let's establish 2 important terms for this post:

Zombie Drone - a state in which a worker drone is improperly disposed of. The WD enters a state of self-reboot as a result of: their core not being properly disconnected, the hardware not physically destroyed or a 606 error is interrupted. In a 0.7% chance, there's the risk of said WD rebooting with a "potential hazardous mutation".

The Absolute Solver - an incredibly advanced monstrous code and supernatural artificial intelligence that mutates in damaged forms of lesser AI.

Neurodivergent:

Cyn is first introduced in a flashback in episode 2, when she is scavenged & brought back to the Elliot mansion by Tessa. Right at the beginning, we the shy drone do something that may be interpreted as neurodivergent - imprinting:

Yes, I may be reading too deeply into this, but the fact that Cyn immediately focuses on the drone with the least threatening position & expression makes me think she may interpret him as the safest person to be around.

Just before this scene, we as the audience got to see the relationship between the main 3 drones Cyn will interact with in the mension:

1. N & V - they are the more meek & submissive types. They're both portrayed as sensitive, and have something of a crush on each other.

2. J - she's more of a mean 'older-bully-sibling' type. Not hasitating to command her peers, even using verbal & physical violence to do so.

So, in a sense, Cyn was right.

In ASD, for example, neurodivergent people might rely on siblings for interpreting social cues, deepening their connection. In addition, siblings may become key figures in routines and shared interests, leading to strong bonds (see for example how N reacts to Cyn showing him "those eyes" referring to her putting a picture of a golden retriever on her visor to convince him to go ask Tessa if they can attend the gala together. Or N suggesting the both of them will watch a movie together).

For another example, ADHD, siblings might help manage impulsivity & help with conflict resolution. We see an example of this in this clip:

After Tessa's abusive mother tells her off, Cyn steps in & exclaims that "they are not broken. We can no longer be thrown out", in direct reaction to the mother threatening to throw out all of Tessa's "dumpster pets".

This, clearly, triggers Cyn's trauma we see a glimpse of in episode 5:

She wakes up in what is essentially a pile of dead bodies, deeply woulded, hurt & terrified. This is what she is referring to, this is what 'no longer' means. It means 'not again'. She doesn't wish what she went through on anyone.

Even though N, Tessa's favorite, protects Cyn, it does not shelter her from Tessa's abuse. Now, let me reiterate, I know that Tessa is an abused child. She suffers from emotional, physical & verbal abuse from both her parents (& maybe other caretakers) and is also just a kid. My point in mentioning said abuse is to merely point put that this is an example to the cycle of it continuing, creating more victims.

Tessa inflicts on Cyn the exact same abuse she suffers at the hands of her parents & more:

She displays blatent favoritism towards certain drones (N & J) over others (neglects V & treats Cyn badly).

She threatens Cyn that something might happen to her if N is hurt for defending her from her mother.

She chains & locks Cyn in the basement with the use of one of her favorite drones (J):

Another example of Cyn's implied neurodiversity is her misunderstanding of Tessa's words. When Tessa threatens Cyn that something might happen to her if N is hurt "because of her" she simply replies:

Cyn does not exactly understand that Tessa is worried that N might die. To her, it is meaningless, because she (or rather, the Absolute Solver) has backups of Ns personality (which is displayed in future episodes, when it is revealed that she is the one to send the murder drones to Copper 9). This is very similar to how people with ASD (& others) may take a statement too literally or misunderstand it at first.

Another tidbit that I like about Cyn, is that she doesn't like being condescended to. She talks back to those who belittle her because of her being 'different'. Not only to Tessa & her mother, but also to her fellow drones:

Cyn: it seems that J forgot to let me out of my basement time-out again.

J: yet here you are.

Cyn (turning to N): annoyed expression.

She also does it to N in her eldritch form:

Another thing I'd like to add is Cyn being quite quirky & unique in her peaceful days, before the Solver took over her entirely:

Physically Disabled

We know that Cyn was sent to be destroyed for some reason before the show began. Her almost being destroyed caused numerous disabilities, some of them were cured (for example: her cracked visor was fixed) but some remained as lasting effects:

Linguistic differences/disabilities -

Cyn cannot talk in a more "smooth" way like her fellow drones. Her voice can be interpreted as robotic & distant (a characteristic some neurodivergent & disabled people may have or may be precieved as having).

Instead of just doing, Cyn says her actions out loud, for example: "sheepish nod", "shuffle, shuffle, shuffle", "tantrum", "jumpscare", "light sip". Some neurodivergent individuals, such as people diagnosed with ADHD may express their thoughts or describe their actions out loud as they are doing them to help with focus, brain fog & organization.

Bodily impairments -

Cyn stands a bit crookedly & doesn't get much support from her limbs to hold her body.

Her head cannot be held straight & has to be supported by something (she usually uses her hand to do that. Even in her eldritch form, before committing the massacre in Elliot mansion):

Though there are many voices of people, both disabled & otherwise that speak against disabled characters being portrayed as villains, I believe Cyn is in no way a disrespectful character. Before she is entirely lost to the Solver her trauma is explored, validated & expended on. She is portrayed as sweet, charming, complex & loving. She is also shown as being bullied, discarded, hurt & abused.

Her disabilities are not the cause of her fall to evil & are not her "trademark" when it comes to her definition (similarly to how, let's say, Darth Vader is mocked for his suit & is known & feared partially because of it). They are a part of her, but they are not the only aspect in her life that define her.

I think Cyn is a pretty good example of what a disabled person may go through in different stages of their lives. As a new sibling, as an unfavored child, as a server/worker, as a friend, as a hero & yes, as a victim of circumstances beyond their control.

I love Cyn, she's very special to me & I can't wait to see where her story will go.

Thank you for reading 🙏💜

[coffeebeanwriting]

Reasons your Novel Might get Rejected

Thinking of publishing traditionally? Here are some reasons why a publishing agency might reject your book. Don’t let any of these reasons keep you from writing, but rather help you strengthen your craft!

1) Your target audience is unclear. Are you writing for middle-grade boys or adult females? Suburban single mothers or war-enthusiast who love everything weaponry and explosive? Of course, your story can end up appealing to multiple categories of people (take Harry Potter for example). But if you know who your prime reader is, you’ll be able to use the correct language, voice, and reading level for them.

2) Your query letter or synopsis is lacking and doesn’t hook the agency. A query letter and synopsis are two different things presented to an agent or publishing company. You must be able to properly sum up your  book in an interesting way for an agency to want to peruse your novel. You have to pique their interest.

A query letter is a brief summary used to capture the attention of an agent/publishing company. A sales pitch one might say. It typically contains your story's main hook, some details about the book (genre, similar books, etc.), and some facts about yourself. If the query letter is successful, the agency will go on to read your synopsis/pages.

A synopsis is a summary of your entire book from start to finish and what happens in it (including character arcs and plot). This is all done in less than two pages.

3) Predictability. It may be predictable characters, or the plot itself. Either way, predictability isn't good. What's the point of reading a book if you can already predict the events? Conflict is the heart of all stories and if your book lacks conflict/stakes, it can become predictable. Give your characters inner conflict just as much as you do physical. Make it difficult for readers to know what your character will do.

4) Your story starts way too early. From what I’ve researched, a huge reason why books get declined is that they start wayyy before anything happens. You’re revealing tons of background information or your character is doing pointless things when they should be approaching the inciting incident. The inciting incident is the scene that launches your character on their journey and should happen sooner than later! 

5) You aren’t balancing showing vs. telling. Contrary to popular belief, a novel should have a bit of both (but... probably more showing). If you spend every scene in extreme detail, you risk slowing your story down. If you tell everything, you aren’t immersing your reader.

6) You’re spending too much time in Act 1. A story consists of three Acts. The beginning, middle, and end. The rising action/set-up, the middle/climax, and the resolution. Don’t spend too much time in Act 1 setting things up. You’ll want to properly pace your story so that it doesn't drag on too long before hitting the heart of the story.

7) Simply... bad writing/grammar. Also, consistent POV is important. This one is self-explanatory, but if you care about what happens in your story, you should also care about the grammar and prose! Typically, hiring editors is a step you must do before taking your novel to a publishing agency.

Instagram: coffeebeanwriting

[x0llaz]

The Perfect Pair 𖦹 ⋆° ✮

Sungchan x fem!reader

WC: 7325

enemies to lovers, Sungchan is an asshole in the beginning whoops, stucco au, angst, fluff, conflict resolution, childhood bully Sungchan

Synopsis: Sungchan and YN have hated each other's guts since they were kids. Now, in their final year of high school, things have began to boil over...

ִ ࣪𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑ִ ࣪𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑ִ ࣪𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑

 It was a sunny day. The sky was clear, the birds were chirping through the wind. It was a perfect day for a perfect recess. YN sat on the ground, playing with a doll by herself while all the other kids played with their friends, taking turns on the swingset, going down the slides. There was a group of boys in her grade, huddled over a bit away, giggling about something. The boys soon pushed someone forward, egging him to do something. 

YN looked up as a boy with dark hair looked down at her, a grin plastered on her face. She would’ve had time to process how cute he was, if he hadn’t reached down and snatched her doll. Immediately she stood up, yelling at him to give it back. He just laughed in her face, avoiding her quick attempts to grab back her toy. 

He danced around her, teasing and taunting until she stepped closer to him and yelled in his face. In response, he pushed her back on the ground, she landed on her butt, with a little hiss from getting scraped. She looked up at him, tears in her eyes as he laughed before walking away, the lunch bell ending before she could yell for a teacher. 

She learned from her friends that his name was Sungchan, and seemed to enjoy picking on girls. They told her stories of his antics, how he got stuck eating with the teacher for a week because he pulled a girl’s hair. All her friends told her he was no good, that he was just a dumb boy. 

The worst part was, she never got her doll back. 

From that day forward, she hated sungchan. She hated his stupid face, and his stupid laugh. She hated his stupid jokes, and the way he’d pick on her. She hated the way he didn’t remember what he did, no matter how silly it was to hold a grudge. 

Yet as they grew up, they walked parallel paths. In later schools of primary school, they were in the same classes, leading into high school they took the same courses, matched in academic skill. When they saw each other in their first shared class, all the way back in third grade, it seemed like sungchan’s goal was to make things difficult for YN. Anything she could do, he could do better. 

And YN made it her goal to prove him wrong. Thus was born, the rivalry. 

Competing for better test scores, racing to have the correct answer, never missing a beat to show off how smart they were. They hardly spoke, unless to argue, and would often just shoot each other dirty looks across the room. 

Sungchan Liked ruffling YN’s feathers, always taking the chance to poke fun at her, call her a nerd, though he did similar things to her. He was the typical bully, YN thought he’d peak in high school for sure. 

To be fair, YN was never very nice to him either. If there was one thing she was good at, it was holding a grudge. Anytime she’d think of any redeeming quality for the boy, she’d always come back to that day in first grade. And with her copious vocabulary, she always knew the right words to hit him with. Though, she didn’t think Sungchan would be able to understand many of them. 

At some point, a classmate asked YN if she had a crush on sungchan, to which she almost threw up at the thought of. “Ew! Anyone but him!”  She explained her hatred for sungchan and his dreamy eyes, but only left the girl unconvinced. 

A boy who would become friends with sungchan asked him the same thing, and he just laughed at the thought. “Why would I have a crush on her, she’s annoying as shit!” He ignored how much he truly liked hearing her pretty voice argue back at him, just seeing her as a stuck up little princess. 

By their junior year, there was something new to campaign for. Something new for them to compete in, to prove how much better they were. Student council. After a year of campaigning, debating and promoting themselves, the results were announced at the Student council meeting. One of them would be The student body president. 

“Choi YN!” her name was called. 

Her eyes lit up, a smile emerging as she went to the podium. Her speech was about what you’d expect from a junior, but She hoped Sungchan would feel like the loser he was. A bit later he approached her, a lazy smirk across his lips as he talked to her.

“Congrats on the win, I'd say you had a good run against me,” He spoke condescendingly, but YN couldn’t help but relish in his defeat. 

“Oh, it wasn’t that difficult,” she smiled, trying to mask the sarcasm in her laugh. 

“You know, you should really fix your attitude if we’re going to be partners,” he pointed out. The smile faded from YN’s face.

“What do you mean?” she asked, confused. 

“Did you forget? I’m your vice president!” he said, faking his own joy.

One of them would be student body president. The runner up would be the Vice.

So much for an easy win. 

“YN, no offense, but this budget sucks,” Sungchan said, looking over her shoulder at the paper on her desk. 

“Thank you for your valued opinion, sungchan, but Mr. Lee said it was the best draft yet, so that’s what we’re sending in,” YN said, trying her best to ignore his figure hovering over her. “You know, maybe you could go do your job instead of trying to do mine,” 

“Just trying to help,” He smiled.

Sungchan always found a problem with YN. Whether it was a policy idea she came up with, or an event she came up with for fundraising, it was never good enough. YN had taken up a habit of ignoring Sungchan, confident her ideas could stand on their own. And fairly certain that Sungchan was stupid. 

But their disagreements were far too severe for two people who were supposed to be partners. Many meetings had turned into the two of them bickering back and forth, where their advisor would need to step in to make them pipe down. It was becoming unproductive for the two of them to work together, fighting more than they were working. 

It didn’t help that YN was beginning to feel the weight of all her courses piling up on her. It was that part of the year where school life balance practically didn’t exist, where most nights were spent doing homework or catching up on work. The stress of being in the top classes, and having to manage multiple jobs for her position was eating her alive. It was only a matter of time before something set her off. 

Sungchan always had exquisite timing. 

“You know, YN, maybe if you weren’t so behind on your assignments, you wouldn’t be so stressed,” Sungchan’s voice mocked her from across her desk. “I don’t think it’s a very good look if our president is always behind on what she needs to do. Stress isn’t good for the job.”

Something inside her snapped. All the anger she struggled to keep at bay was boiling up all over again. 

“Can you just shut the fuck up?” She snapped her head up at him, face turning red. “Like genuinely, let me do what I need to do, and leave me alone!”

“YN!” their advisor shouted from across the room. “That talk isn’t tolerated, apologize!”

“No! He’s done nothing but insult me and my work. Why should I apologize to him?” YN defended herself, Sungchan scoffing. 

“Because you two are a team. You can’t work well together if-”

“I can’t work well if he’s always breathing down my back insulting me!” 

“I was giving you advice, YN, learn the difference,” Sungchan laughed as he spoke, making YN’s anger rise more. 

“I told you to shut up!” YN shouted at him, her anger burning in her throat. 

“No! Both of you, out, now. Come back when you’ve figured out your problems.” Mr. Lee told them. 

YN groaned, stomping out of the room, as sungchan followed behind her lazily. They stood in an empty hallway, sungchan looked around the hall, seeming bored, as YN stared a hole in the ground. Neither one of them wanted to break the silence, neither wanted to acknowledge their part in their stupid rivalry. But YN had one burning question on her mind. 

“Why did you do it?” She asked, her voice quiet, not looking up at him. 

“Do what?” Sungchan scoffed, leaning against the wall. His arms folded across his chest as he looked down at her. 

“First Grade,” She spoke up a little. “It was recess, you stole my doll,” 

“Oh my god,” Sungchan audibly laughed, a wide grin of disbelief across his stupid face. “Is that why you’re such a bitch? You’re mad about a stupid toy?”

“No, I'm mad because you’ve treated me like shit ever since then. And I want to know why. What did I ever do to you to make you hate me? You took my doll, and then you never stopped hating me. You never stopped being a dick.” YN looked up at him finally. She still looked upset, but there was something Sungchan couldn’t decipher in her gaze. He hated it. 

He pushed off the wall, stepping closer towards her, causing her to take a step back. “Has anyone ever told you you’re a bit… insane?” he asked, leaning down to her eye level. “Honestly, has anyone?”

“Has anyone ever told you you’re a dickhead? Do you get off on being an asshole, or are you really just that stupid?” YN asked him, trying to fight back. 

“Ever since we were little, you were such a prick. You were such a prissy princess, and you still are now. You know why I don’t like you? Because you think you’re better than everyone, and someone needs to bring you off your high horse,” Sungchan had a condescending grin on his face. 

“No, I don’t,” YN mumbled, stumbling backwards. The words hit her harder than she would’ve expected.

“Bullshit,” Sungchan smiled, cornering her against a locker, his hand resting near her head. “You think you’re so special, that you’re the smartest girl in the world, but you’re not,”

“Sungchan, stop,” Her voice broke, though she tried to keep herself steady, trying to blink back the tears that welled in her eyes.

“Aw, you gonna cry?” He asked. “You know what I think? I think you’re pathetic. I think you’re a pathetic girl who’s never had a reality check. I think you’re pathetic for holding a grudge because I stole your toy. Boo Hoo. Welcome to the real world, there’s more than just your stupid dolls.” 

YN shoved at his chest, trying to push him away from her, but he stood firm. She fought back the tears that threatened to fall. 

“You know, YN, you really never changed,” He laughed. “You’re still the crybaby brat you were back when we were kids. Just a pathetic. useless. crybaby,” 

There was silence between the two of them. The sound that broke it was a painful sounding sob from YN, as she covered her mouth, tears racing down her cheeks as she began gasping for air. Sungchan took a step back as She slid down the locker and to the floor, wrapping her arms around her legs as if she was trying to protect herself. 

Sungchan was in shock. He’d never seen YN in such a position. He’d never seen her beyond the perfect image she always wore. The only time He saw her truly cry was when they were little. But this? Seeing her curled in on herself, sobbing into her legs, it made him rethink his actions. He thought she was immune to his words, that she’d spit something back that was just as mean, but here she was, broken down, sobs escaping her as her breathing picked up quickly. 

He knelt down a bit, feeling remorse build up in his chest, reaching a hand to her shoulder. “YN?” his voice was soft, a drastic shift from his venomous voice. When he touched her, she smacked him away. She smacked his hand away from her shoulder, looking up at him with hatred in her eyes.

“Fuck you!” she yelled at him as she stood up, fleeing before he could process.  

She ran to their homeroom, shoving her things into her bag as she wiped the tears from her eyes. She threw her bag over her shoulders, rushing out of the room as Mr. Lee questioned her. She didn’t respond, just storming away before anything worse could happen. Sungchan was still in the hallway, and when he saw her, he quickly approached, following behind her, calling her name. She heard him, but didn’t listen. 

When she got to the front doors, she saw it was storming outside. She heard as Sungchan called after her, telling her not to walk home, that the rain was too heavy, offering to drive her, but She ignored him. She didn’t care about the Rain, she just wanted to get away from him.

YN was gone for the rest of the week, supposedly having caught the flu. Sunfchan knew better. He knew it was likely because he went too far, that what he said was unforgivable. It made him feel even worse. 

He tried emailing her, texting her for the first time ever just trying to apologize for what he said, but she never responded. He didn’t really expect her to, he knew he was wrong. When he told his friends what happened, they all told him the same thing. 

“Chan, you’re a dick,”

He knew they were right, that he in fact was a dick. 

When she came back the next week, Sungchan made it his mission to talk to her. To get her to talk to him. When he saw her in homeroom, he approached her with a small smile, ready to genuinely apologize for what he said. But when she ignored him, looking up only to roll her eyes, he frowned. 

He assumed she was just playing hard-ball. That she’d eventually talk if he tried hard enough. 

In all their meetings, he’d try to be extra nice, complimenting her or bringing her coffee, but she always ignored him, a straight face plastered onto her like a mask. After a week of trying with no results, sungchan wanted to punch a wall. 

“I give up,” He said to his friends at lunch. “What can I do if she doesn’t even listen to me? She won’t even hear me out! What am I supposed to do to fix it if she won’t let me!”

“You’re really dumb, you know,” Shotaro laughed at the younger boy. 

“What?” sungchan furrowed his brows. 

“You think that she owes you forgiveness after what you did?” He asks. 

“No, but-”

“Then stop expecting it. Honestly, I don't blame her for ignoring you. You’ve been a bitch to her since you were in elementary school,” Shotaro sighed. “You’re not going to get anywhere like this. If you want things to be better, then you gotta stop being a dick. You can’t apologize and then go back to chastising her for stupid shit.”

Sungchan looked down. “I know,”

“Then stop being a dick!” eunseok said from across the table. 

“Well she’s just a bitch!” Sungchan tried to shift the blame. 

“No, she’s really not. She’s a bitch to you because you’ve never been nice to her. She’s actually a really sweet girl,” Eunseok defended her. 

“How would you know?”

“She’s in my math class. She helps me with like… everything,” Eunseok shrugged. 

“Why is this the first I'm hearing of that?” sungchan asked. 

“Because you’d make such a fuss about how bitchy she was and how much you hated her.” the older boy shrugged. “And if you took a moment to stop being such an asshole, you’d see she was way nicer than you thought. And you’d also find out there was more to her than just being a spoiled nerd, or whatever you call her,” 

When he went to the library that day, he heard something. While he was reading his assigned reading book, he heard a soft, muffled sound. He heard someone gasping a bit, little sniffles. He realized he heard someone crying. 

As he walked slowly toward the sound, he stepped on a creaky part of the floor, and suddenly the sound stopped. He approached the book shelf, trying to see who was on the other side, when he was met with a pair of eyes doing the same, now eye to eye with the other person. He quickly realized it was YN, and a moment later she was running out with her books in her arms. 

Another week went by, YN ignored and avoided sungchan like the plague. Sungchan felt hopeless in his attempts to talk to her. He missed when she’d bicker with him, even when she’d insult him or scold him. He wanted anything but silence. 

When he went to the library that Thursday, it was a little late. He had finished up his duties, and looked around for YN to try and talk again, but couldn’t find her. As he looked for a spot in the library, his music playing in his ears a little too loudly, he soon realized why he couldn’t find her. Because there she was, cheek resting against an open book, papers spread out on her table, hair sprawled across her forehead, sleeping peacefully in the quiet of the library. 

Sungchan couldn’t help but smile, looking at her so peacefully sleeping. He checked the time, and figured she would probably need to leave soon. He picked up her papers and slid them into her folder, and picked up the piles of books she stacked around her, and gently took the last one out from under her. He was lucky she was a heavy sleeper, or he’d probably get slapped. When everything was put away neatly, he turned back to her. 

He crouched down, looking at her sleep peacefully. He brushed some hair away from her forehead, smiling to himself at how cute she looked. 

How what she looked?

He shook himself out of his thoughts, and brought his hand to her shoulder, shaking her lightly. She didn;t budge, turning to rest her forehead on her arms, and he shook her again. And then again. When she woke up she sat up quickly, not processing her surroundings, or that sungchan was right next to her. 

When she looked at him, her eyes widened, looking around at the now clean table. 

“Fuck, fuck fuck!” She whispered to herself as Tears welled in her eyes, bringing her hands to her eyes. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Sungchan whispered, his hand resting on her shoulder as she cried. “You’re okay, just breathe,” he told her and she shoved his hand away. Deserved. “What’s wrong?”

YN looked at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. “The fuck do you mean what’s wrong? I fell asleep and lost most of my work time, and now you’re here to rub it in!” 

“No, i’m not,” sungchan shook his head. “I’m just here to wake you up,” he shrugged. 

YN rolled her eyes and rested her forehead in her arms, facing down at the table. How could she have been so stupid? Letting herself fall asleep? And now Sungchan was here, the library, the place she went to avoid him. She sighed deeply, sniffling a bit, embarrassed by her tears, when she heard sungchan speak. 

“I’ll drive you home,” He told her quietly. 

“What?” 

“It’s late, soon it’ll be dark, and you have a lot to carry. So i can give you a ride,” he shrugged, hoping she wouldn’t reject the offer. 

“Why would I want a ride home from you?” she asked, looking up from the table, a frown etched onto her face. 

“Just an offer,” Sungchan sighed, shifting his weight to his other foot. “Take it or leave it,” 

YN had a choice. She could make a statement, stand up for herself and not give into sungchan’s offer. It’s what she should do. She didn’t want to spend anymore time with him after what he said to her. 

But YN was tired. And her bag was heavy. And she heard sungchan drove a pretty nice car. Maybe she could tell him off while they were in there. She knew he would be too guilty to defend himself. 

“Fine,” she said begrudgingly. 

“Good,” he smiled lightly, bending down and picking up her bag, carrying it like it was nothing. 

“What are you doing?” YN asked, trying to snatch her bag back. 

“Carrying your bag, let’s go,” he started walking away before she could protest. She ended up trailing behind him with a frown, arms folded across her chest. 

When they got tp his car, sungchan put her bag in the backseat while she got in the front. He got in after her and started the car without a word. He handed her his phone so she could type in her address, and pick the music. They got on the road, neither of them wanting to talk. 

He glanced at her from time to time. She rested her head against the window, watching the road pass by as the day faded into night. He noticed the tired look in her eyes that he realized had been there for a few weeks now, but never had stood out to him. He noticed how her lips stayed in a little pout, wondering what was going through her mind as she looked out into the darkening road. 

And then he spoke. 

“I’m really sorry,” She turned at the words. “For everything,” She didn’t speak. “You didn’t deserve how I treated you, ever. I shouldn’t have said what I said, and I’m so sorry.” Sungchan let out a sigh. “It’s been eating me up, i needed to say it to your face,” 

She looked down at her lap, picking at the skin on her fingers. “So why’d you do it?” 

“What part?” sungchan asked, a bit of humor in his voice. 

“All of it,” no humor in hers. Not the time for lightheartedness.

“I wish I knew, I was just acting on my impulse. WHen you asked me about why I did what I did in first grade, I didn’t know what to say, I just got angry. I didn’t think about all the times I was the one to start things with you, or pick on you, I only thought about that one thing. I just got mad, even though I didn’t have the right to be mad. You had all the right to ask, I reacted badly.” he tried piecing together his thoughts. “And I didn’t realize how badly, what I did, hurt you,” 

“You didn’t realize? Sungchan you made me miserable,” YN scoffed. 

“I know that now, and I’m sorry. I never knew how to fix things with you, I never was able to swallow my pride and admit I was wrong for how I treated you.” he apologized once more, knowing he could never undo all the hurt he had done to her. 

“Are you forgetting everything you said to me? You can’t just unsay all that to me. You can’t say you regret it so much and expect to move on,” 

“I know,” Sungchan nodded. “What I will say is that I never should have said those things to you. No matter how angry I was, you didn’t deserve that. I was disrespectful, and I crossed a line by saying that to you. And I don’t expect you to just move on, I don’t deserve that at all,” his voice felt genuine. 

“Then why are you driving me home right now?” she asked, still frowning. 

“Because I want you to get home safe, and I want to be better. I don’t want you to hate me, but I know that’s your own choice. I just want you to know that I’ll try,” Sungchan pulled up to her house, parking on the street. 

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes as she opened the car door. Sungchan got out to grab her bag from the backseat, crossing around the car. 

“For what it’s worth, I really am sorry,” he handed her the bag. 

“Let’s talk next week,” she mumbled. 

“What?” Sungchan furrowed his brow. 

“When I'm not so sleep deprived, when I have time to process, let’s talk about us going forward. Don’t bother me until then,” she told him before walking up to her house, not giving him time to respond. 

“Yes ma’am,” Sungchan muttered to himself, watching her get inside before he drove himself home.

Sungchan was nervous. He sat in the agreed upon cafe, waiting for YN to get there like he was waiting on a date. But he was never nervous for dates, Usually because dates actually liked him. But YN didn’t like him, and this certainly wasn’t a date. 

Thankfully, YN had seemed to be doing better that week. When she walked through the doors to the cafe, sungchan couldn’t help but think about how pretty she was, though at the moment he should be more concerned with whether or not she was going to murder him. She sat down in front of him, he had already ordered her drink. He was about to greet her when she spoke. 

“Against my better judgment, i’ve decided to forgive you,” YN told him. 

“Really?” that was not the statement he expected. “So, you’re not going to kill me?”

“I have some measures,” sungchan straightened up, ready to listen. “Going forward, we aren’t going to hate each others guts. Let’s just move on, no more childish insults, no more fights over nothing. From now on, we get along.”

“Alright,” sungchan nods. 

“And you have to actually tell me why you took my doll, why you did any of it,” YN adds. “I need closure,” 

Sungchan nodded. “I had some really bad friends, which sounds kind of stupid, but they kept telling me that if I did what they did, I would be cool. They were older than me, so I thought they were right. So I spent my first grade year picking on kids like a loser, trying to be cool. They told me to go take your doll, so I did. I thought I’d be the coolest boy in the first grade, but I just felt bad. They told me to keep picking on you and I did, i made the decision to keep going, to keep being a little shit until I realized there was more to life than picking on girls. By the time I realized it, it was too late.” he told her. “And i’m not trying to say I was blameless, I still continued longer than I should have, i’m just trying to give you an explanation,” 

“So you’ve always been kinda dumb?” She asked. 

“Basically,” sungchan laughed a little, and saw her smile a little bit. “We should study together,” 

“Why?” She asked, skeptical of his suggestion. 

“Well, we’re supposed to be partners. So we should start learning to work together,” he shrugged, a little less confident than when he initially asked. “Just an idea, you don’t have to agree,”

“Are you good at Calc?” YN asked. 

“Uh, yeah, i’m good at it,” Sungchan looked a little confused. 

“Well, i’m good at History,” she told him. “So we can help each other out,” 

Sungchan smiled. “Cool,” he nodded a little. “I can give you rides, if you need them,”

“Okay,” YN agreed. “Oh and you have to get me coffees before our meetings,” 

“Deal,” sungchan smiled. “So, you really don’t hate me?”

“I’m in the process of not hating you,” YN corrected him. “We have a little ways to go,” 

Surprisingly, it was easy to not hate sungchan. It seemed like he was making an effort to be a nice person, which YN appreciated. He always showed up to their student council meetings five minutes early with her coffee in hand. He stopped chastising her for her work, and she stopped calling him an idiot. Mr. Lee was surprised, but pleased to see the progress the two had made. 

Their study time was productive, spending time going through each subject with one another to make sure they both had a good idea of what they were learning. It was a lot more helpful than she expected. 

While the car rides were mostly quiet for a week or two, with only a little small talk filling the air, the two of them began talking to one another more. They’d rant about teachers, or classmates who got on their nerves, or talk about the show that they coincidentally both liked. Who would have thought that the two people who were already somewhat similar would have so much in common between each other. 

YN found herself enjoying her time with Sungchan. If you had told her that a month ago, she would’ve called you stupid. 

And Sungchan couldn’t deny that he thought YN was great. He struggled to hide his smile when he was around her. He couldn’t contain his thoughts of how cute she was, or how much he liked her laugh. 

When he asked her to hang out, outside of stucco meetings, or study sessions, or their drives back to YN’s house, it seemed normal, that this was a progression of their friendship. When she accepted, Sungchan felt his stomach churn with excitement, joy that he could spend more time with her. 

The first time, they just went to Sungchan’s house and watched a show on his couch, sharing a bag of popcorn and a bag of candy that was too big for one person. They spent most of the time talking, half of their attention on the show, half of it on each other. By midnight, they had ordered takeout and shared their food, switched spots on the couch, and YN accidentally kicked Sungchan in the jaw.

When people Noticed how much Sungchan and YN started hanging out, they thought it was some sort of joke. Almost everyone knew they hated each others guts, and now, here they were, walking down the halls together? And sungchan was carrying her backpack???? The hell happened?

When she walked through the halls, Sungchan was right behind her. There were times his arm would be slung around her shoulder, or she’d punch him in the arm. He’d ruffle her hair, she’d shove him lightly. Either this was a new form of torturing each other, or they actually got along. 

Their partnership as student leaders was strengthened by their newfound closeness, and through their growth they never lost the bickering. But instead of insulting each other’s character, they now just poked fun, made light hearted jokes. And they always seemed to enjoy it. 

It was weird. 

It was also obvious that Sungchan had a crush.

All his friends could tell by the way he brought her up so much. When she’d approach them, Sungchan’s demeanor would change, a big smile on his face that would linger as she walked away. He wasn’t very slick. Comments that flew over YN’s head that were too flirty for someone you just had platonic feelings for, lingering gazes on her, compliments galore, it was a miracle YN didn’t figure it out. 

He remembered what made her laugh, so he’d try to come up with jokes that she’d like because he loved hearing her laugh, watching her cover her grin and try to compose herself. He took note of her favorite snacks, and her usual coffee orders, not needing to ask after getting them for her so many times. He memorized the details of her face, the way her eyes sparkled when she wore certain makeup, how the apples of her cheeks got so big when she smiled, the way her lashed fanned over her cheeks, how she’d scrunch her nose a bit when she was thinking. He knew it all. He liked it all. 

He liked her. 

And damn, did he know it. He thought about her a lot, trying to come up with what would be their “perfect date”. He tried being obvious, but it was very difficult because somehow, this prodigy couldn’t tell when he was flirting with her. He texted her all the time, staying up late to have stupid conversations with her, wishing she was right there next to him and he could scoop her into his arms and talk to her in person. 

Now they sat in sungchan room, laying on his bed watching TikToks and eating ramen. Very romantic. YN sat up on the bed, stretching her back a little as sungchan just watched her. He looked up at her like she was the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. 

“Is this weird?” She asked. 

“Is what weird?” Sungchan sat up. 

“Us, hanging out, being normal and not hating each others guts?” She smiled, looking over at him as he smiled back at her. 

“Nah, I think it’s pretty cool,” he tells her. She didn’t notice the way his eyes trailed along her body before landing back on her lips.

“Okay, ‘cause sometimes I just randomly get the feeling that this is like… too out of character for us and we just-“

He pressed his lips against hers. 

She froze for a moment before sighing a bit and leaning in, feeling his hand rest on her waist, his other coming up to brush back her hair. Her hand pressed against his chest, grabbing at his shirt as she shifted slightly towards him. 

She was kissing him. 

He kissed her. 

Hello?

She pulled away with a gasp, eyes wide at what just happened. Sungchan looked apologetic, pushing his hair back. 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-“ he started, catching his breath. 

“No, no, it's… it’s okay, don't worry,” she told him, but was standing up from where she sat on his bed. “I uh, I need to go home,”

Sungchan didn’t say anything to her as she walked out. 

Sungchan kissed her. How many other girls had he kissed? What did that kiss mean? Why did he kiss her? Why was he such a good kisser? Why did she enjoy kissing him so much? Did she like sungchan? Did-

Channie: hey I wanna say I’m sorry again

Channie: I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable

YN: it’s ok dw

YN: I just need to think

And think she did. She barely got a wink of sleep that night, all that was in her mind was a replay of their kiss. Thinking about kissing him made her think more. She thought about if she liked him, or if she was just flustered. And then she thought about him, how close the two of them had gotten over the past weeks. She realized she noticed things about sungchan that she would’ve scoffed at before.

The next day at school was awkward, neither wanting to bring up the night before. They attended their classes like normal, but the chatter and playfulness between them was gone, both too scared to initiate anything. The student council meeting after was awkward, everyone in the room could tell, but they remained quiet. Sungchan still drove her home, what kind of guy would he be to let her go alone? But their drive was almost silent, the music only made the air more tense, as if they were both trying to drown out their own thoughts. 

It remained like that for a week. 

YN would sometimes catch sungchan staring over at her like he wanted to talk. When she’d lock eyes with him, he’d sit up taller and then turn his attention away from her. 

At night, the two wouldn’t text as much, sungchan’s goodnight texts stopped as YN had stopped responding to a lot of his texts. How was she supposed to continue as normal? How was she supposed to pretend that everything was the same? How was she supposed to pretend she didn’t like him?

Through their weeks together, YN always felt a little something in her chest. She thought it was just joy that finally the two could put the past behind them. But in her week (that now bled into the second week) of rethinking their last close interaction, she realized that it was a little more than just joy. She realized how much she liked being around sungchan, how she liked when his arm was wrapped around her, and she liked staying up late at night just to talk to him more. 

She especially liked kissing him.

Oh she was so screwed. 

The next student council meeting was about two weeks from when he kissed her. So two weeks of being extremely awkward around each other. By now, the tension was palpable, and Mr. Lee was getting nervous. 

“Are you two fighting again?” he asked as YN and sungchan sat an awkward distance apart, still next to each other. They both looked up, looked at each other and shook their heads. 

“No,” they both said at the same time. 

“Well you two aren’t as chatty as you were before. Don’t get me wrong, i like the quiet, but i’d prefer if you wouldn’t go back to trying to kill each other,” he told them. 

“Don’t worry, mr. lee, we’re just hard at work,” Sungchan told him with a reassuring smile. “Nothing’s wrong,” Lie. 

When mr. Lee walked away, he looked at YN. 

“We should probably talk,” He told her with an awkward smile. “You know,” 

YN sighed. “Not right now, okay,” 

“Okay… when?” he asked, wanting the tension gone from their relationship. 

“I don’t know, right now just isn’t the time to talk,” She told him, the cold tone Sungchan knew so well creeping back into her voice. 

“YN, it’s been two weeks, we have to talk about it if-”

“Sungchan, drop it!” she dropped her pencil, looking over at him with a look he knew all too well. Sungchan didn’t say anything before getting up, telling Mr. Lee he was going to the restroom. 

YN sighed, regretting snapping at Sungchan. The thought of talking about what happened scared her, she was afraid they wouldn’t be the same if they acknowledged the elephant in the room. But she knew she had to talk about it. She knew Sungchan deserved to have a talk about what happened. 

When he came back, YN looked up at him hopefully, hoping he’d take his seat next to her and they could resume, but he picked up his things and moved to his desk. YN frowned, going back to doing her work, looking up occasionally to watch what he was doing.

She got up from her spot and walked over to his desk to apologize. She leaned against the table and tapped his shoulder, giving him an apologetic smile. Sungchan didn’t return it, YN couldn’t read what he was thinking.

“I shouldn’t have snapped at you-” she started but got cut off. 

“Let’s talk later,” he told her, his voice even as he spoke. 

YN frowned, but nodded as she turned away. It was what she deserved, she was the one to shut him out first, she shouldn’t be surprised he did the same. But it still hurt. She realized how Sungchan must have felt when she shut him down. 

The rest of the meeting passed with awkward silences and reminders of important dates that were coming up. YN could barely focus, but Sungchan seemed to be doing just fine. He seemed to work harder when he was a little frustrated. But at the end of their session he lingered behind, waiting for her to pack up. 

She approached him with a little smile, which he reciprocated before looking to the ground, and starting to walk towards the door. Once in the hallway, YN decided to speak. 

“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” she said, looking up at him. She watched as he turned to look at her, his face softening to a soft smile.  

“It’s okay,” he assured, looking down at her. 

The awkward silence turned comfortable, and the distance between the two seemed smaller. The elephant in the room was very much present, but at least they weren’t upset with each other. They walked to Sungchan’s car quietly, the drive to YN’s house was nearly silent if not for the occasional small talk sungchan would interject, trying to ease the tension. 

He pulled up to her driveway, looking over at her with a small smile. “Have a good night, YN,” he told her. 

YN smiled, pulling her bag into her lap, about to open the door when she hesitated. Something rushed her system, and she asked, “do you want to come inside for a bit?” 

Sungchan paused for a moment, considering her offer before nodding stiffly. He parked his car and got out, leaving his bags in his car. YN smiled and got out, waiting for him to cross around before leading him inside. “My parents are out of town for a couple nights, so we should be fine,” She didn’t want her parents there to question her motives for bringing a boy into the house. 

Sungchan nodded, and she opened the door for him. Her house was neat, everything in place, nice and neat. He looked around and saw all the achievements of the household, her father was a successful lawyer, and her mother a proud business woman. In the shadow, YN was their perfect little student. Sungchan began to understand why she was so serious about their rivalry. 

He absentmindedly followed her to her room, looking around the house like it was a museum. He’d never seen a cleaner house, even with his neat-freak mother. 

“We should talk,” YN’s voice broke him from his daze. She motioned her arms for sungchan to make himself comfortable. He took a spot on the foot of her bed, glancing around a bit before landing his eyes on her. 

“Yeah,” he nodded, feeling his nerves build up. 

Was she going to reject him? Tell him he misread their relationship? Call him ugly? No one could ever call him ugly… right?

“I’ve been thinking a lot about… a few weeks ago, when we-” she made random gestures that in no way implied kissing. 

“Kissed?”

“Yeah, that,” she sighed, an awkward laugh following. “Listen, I don't know what it meant to you, but I'm gonna be honest… I really liked it, and I really like you, and i don’t know how you feel, so if we’re not on the same page-”

Sungchan got to his feet the moment she said she liked him, and cut her off by kissing her once more, relief flooding his system, smiling when he felt her wrap her arm around his neck. His hand held her cheek lightly as they kissed, breaking away, smiling brightly. 

“So you-” YN started, gasping lightly, trying to catch her breath. 

“Yes, you idiot,” Sungchan grinned, brushing his thumb against her cheek. “And you call me dumb, i’ve been flirting with you for weeks!”

YN just smiled, bringing him back in for another kiss. 

Around school, most people had heard about YN and sungchan, most were in disbelief, some could see it coming from a mile away. Mr. Lee grew annoyed with their newfound affection, because now instead of constant bickering, he had to listen to sungchan constantly calling YN pretty, or flirting with her. 

But the bickering never stopped. If there was anything about them, they always found something to argue about. The two of them always had something to fight over, always in a friendly competition. 

This time, they just didn’t hate each other. 

taglist: @oftenjisung , @vhuteryh , @skzhoe4life , @cheederzchez

[californiannostalgia]

I just realized. Usually, after something so intense like c3 episode 51, the party gets to huddle up and lick wounds. Bells Hells got split up. Some people joined, then left. More importantly, fucking Bor'dor happened.

I can't believe I forgot about that. Imogen, Fearne, Chetney, and FCG freed a celestial bull or something. There was pvp but no one died, and the resolution was romance.

Orym, Laudna, and Ashton were deceived by someone who appeared to be a friend but turned out to be malicious. Followers of gods were doing bad things, too. Laudna looked to Orym, he nodded for the kill, and Laudna went one step further to suck the life out of Bor'dor for trying to kill them.

The party split actually explains so much about the current Bells Hells dynamic. Orym wants desperately to trust but believes he can't and shouldn't, not completely. Laudna thinks the world is trying to kill her, which is flawed but not preposterous.

Ashton admittedly is more guilty than self-destructive after he nearly killed himself, but has recently gotten confirmation through FCG's sacrifice that they couldn't save a self-destructive friend. It's a mindfuck. (I mean at least Ashton doesn't think they will be abandoned anymore?)

Orym tried to give up his life and freedom to guarantee their party's survival, and he didn't tell anyone. Laudna, without pausing to discuss Delilah's plans with anyone, actively initiated inter-party conflict. Ashton didn't reveal a potentially life-threatening plan to anyone except Fearne, and distressed a lot of people.

Bor'dor fucked them up real bad. Bor'dor messed with their heads. I mean they were already messed up, but they got worse because of Bor'dor. Bor'dor is like a shadow over their narrative. Like Ashton said, Bor'dor was the worst.