#Can An Ex Come Back After
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you got me into aircorn godbless (derogatory. I'm now hyperfixated. THEM ..) /silly /lh
You know what that means?! I get an excuse to post these super old doodles!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA /lh
I have not been super involved in the OSC as of late, but I won't give up an opportunity to share art, whether new or old, of all my sillies.
I have a stockpile of aircorn art that I've been sitting on, I really need to share more of it. But here are some of the lighthearted ones. Like this skating doodle! (Popcorn try to remember Airy's face is made of glass challenge IMPOSSIBLE GONE DANEROUS GONE DEADLY????)
A bunch more doodles under the cut:
Some older older doodles of Popcorn's beef with Rotton Apple.
After Showvember, Popcorn and Rotten Apple dated super briefly. It was incredibly sour for the both of them. Neither of their needs were not being met, and both (but mostly Popcorn) were not pulling their weight in the relationship. When they separated, both talked very poorly about the other.
Beanie, RA's current partner, completely validates all of RA's feelings. Airy, on the other hand, is chill with Popcorn venting to him but doesn't entirely believe her side (cuz she exaggerates everything). Also, Popcorn is very flip-floppy with her views on RA, cuz on one hand he annoys the hell outta her, but she really liked his company when they were together and just kinda wants to hold onto that. She wants everything and nothing to do with him. RA just wants nothing to do with her, but she has an uncanny way or wiggling into people's lives without their knowledge.
But other than that...
AIRCORN WEDINGGGGGGG!!!!!!
Yeahhhhh in my hc they get married. Their kids are the ring bearer and the flower girl, but they're not illustrated there. And you can only imagine how fun the wedding was for the two best men (minus Clock cuz he's just happy to be there). Worst music playlist on the planet was played during it too and the food was either banging or ass lol.
Also some Rotten Apple and Beanie for the road <3
Hopefully I can draw these dudes again, but like newer. I care for all of them deeply lol. Have a good one homies 👋👋👋
#me like 3 months ago: “I can finally give up the obsession! I'm coming home-!”#me after reading that ask: “I'M BACK IN THE FUCKING BUILDING AGAIN!!!!!! OOOOOOOH MY-”#all /j btw tysm for the ask <3#rotten apple's stem and leaf work like a tail#like it sways n stuff#i love writing “it's complicated” exes#beanie is the ideal partner for rotten apple like how airy is the ideal partner for popcorn <3#also the aircorn kids are a metal stovetop popcorn maker named calypso and a spotlight named dix#maybe i'll make a post about them too who knows#but feel free to chomp on these while you wait#aircorn mooties come getchall fooooood#hfjone#itft#airy#popcorn#aircorn#popcairy#beanrot#poprot#hfjone airy#showvember popcorn#showvember rotten apple#showvember beanie#hfjone liam#liam plecak#itft clock#object show#object show community#osc#showvember
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You know when I hear people say they want more messy relationships in ST, I’m tempted to point my finger to the corner where Stonathan sits.
#to me they have toxic boyfriendism energy#why do you think I made them the way they are in my st bbc ghosts au#I will admit that I’m not really into messy relationships myself but stonathan is a special case where I will consume it#like look at it this way#the ex of Nancy caught kissing her boyfriend who once beat him up in an alley back in 83’#there is drama there and I hope next season I get some good ‘stonathan shenanigans in stupidity’ moments#and have Steve and Nancy be snarky exes that gifts me back s1 stoncy friendship dynamic#and then Jonathan has a boyfriend and a girlfriend who fight for the right to wear the yellow sweater and the black denim jacket#it’s the fine wine of ST enemies to lovers stories#and it’s sad to see that barely anybody wants to drink it cause it’s sooooo good#note that I will be using the saying ‘stonathan shenanigans in stupidity’ whenever I can after s5 comes out cause it rolls off the tongue#amazingly#stranger things#stonathan
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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In the fic I'm working on, Len asks Jim not to call him Bones in front of his ex-wife, because he doesn't want her calling him that. Jim agrees, of course, but now I'm imagine him nearly slipping up and catching himself by calling Len "babe" instead. And unfortunately for Len neither death nor a serum synthesized from super human blood can cure James "I am the Drama" Kirk of his Commit to the Bit Disease. Len doesn't even bother putting up a fight, just starts throwing out the occasional "darlin'", and let's Jim be as clingy as he pleases.
#jim kirk#leonard mccoy#creative musings#i'm not sure i can fully make this work with the portion i already have written toward the ending of the fic#but i might try to make it work for kicks and giggles#also jim deserves to be a little shit as a treat#he did just recently die and come back to life after all and now he has to deal with bones' abusive mother and ex#i think hes earned it
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If Kipperlilly DOES end up betraying Porter/Jace as part of a secret other scheme she has (whether good or evil) and it has to do with saving Lucy, I just know she’s going to be a bitch about it and pull a ‘sorry, I only save High Five Heroes’ before leaving her other friends to die or some shit. And then she will take her final form: Magic Betty from Adventure Time, betraying her allies and saving her frost gf at the expense of the world. It would also parallel what Ankarna is going through (‘your girlfriend’s out of town, it sucks’, becoming a little imperialist rage machine under the influence of Porter/Sunstone but not being able to fully turn on Lucy despite going against her values and turning into a violent weirdo). This is my wish. My dream. I am manifesting it. Magic Betty Kipperlilly I believe in you.
#I am currently painting clown makeup on my face rn but this is what I’ve been rooting for from the beginning so let me dream#Come on though she HAS to have some other shit going on though right?#She was DEFINITLY in that temple when the Bad Kids said Ankarna’s name#Brennan literally rolled#and we know she was in Porter’s office#so WHY hadn’t she told him Ankarna’s real name yet? We know he genuinely believed Fig found it#Also the BKs couldn’t see who was in the window during the Wanda Childa scene#Which one of the RGs has invisibility?#HMMMM#Wanda saying ‘Kipperlilly? Why are you doing this? Is it because you’re jealous?’ before getting carried off by a fake Porter would let KP#know ‘okay they FULLY saw what happened after I killed Buddy and are onto us’ which would cause her to follow them to the temple#Also…if NONE of the Rat Grinders knew Ankarna’s name then what did Lucy write on her form to change her divinity???#We KNOW it was Ankarna’s name and not the ‘symbol representing her’ because no one could see it BECAUSE the god was dead and no one alive#knew her name#Which means Lucy HAD TO HAVE KNOWN and was keeping it from the others right?#And when she died and didn’t come back they were fucked because they couldn’t even check the form anymore#But#Brennan also said that if Porter WASNT using Devil’s Honey and genuinely believed in Rage And Conquest goddess Ankarna instead of just her#domain then he and his ritual would (maybe) bring her back instead of killing her permenantly so he can take her domain#And idk#A powerful goddess of rage and conquest who despite everything can’t be turned against her sister and ex#who’s resurrection would mean the rune could be broken and Lucy can come back to life#One who has (or had) a personal vendetta against at least one of the bad kids#and a personal vendetta against the people who led to Lucy’s death#that sounds pretty appealing to someone as spiteful and obsessive as Kipperlilly doesn’t it#especially after her best (maybe only real) friend died and didn’t come back#especially if she stayed dead specifically to stop Porter#Again I’m putting my clown makeup on but I don’t want her to be secretly good or anything just unhinged and gay and a parallel to Ankarna#Please world let me have this I’m on my knees#dimension 20
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Spoilers for Alan Wake/Control games and DLCs: one of the things I really like in Alan Wake 2 is the confirmation that, no, Alan can’t create something out of nothing. There were implications in-story that supported that, but it was good to have that be a big part in the sequel. The AWE control dlc easily made it seem like Alan himself had a role in the events of the game and the formation of the FBC, and, personally, seeing it through that lens cheapened a lot of the game and Jesse’s story. Instead, having his writing influence the Hiss and try to manipulate (even out of desperation) Jesse/the FBC to end Hartman and get help, fit right into plot and conflicts of Alan Wake 2, with Alan being sympathetic, but also an asshole for trying to change and control people’s lives in his writing.
#since the awe dlc dropped I was slightly worried that it was going the meta route of Alan writing everything in control#but since Alan wake 2 I’ve been. thank god that wasn’t the case 😭#this way makes everything more complicated and mysterious. which I appreciate. makes everything creepier#will say. it’s still wild how much Alan can influence the narrative.#light spoilers for the final draft but—> makes me think of the writers room video where he doesn’t know what he’ll be at the spirals end#like I don’t think he’ll be Evil or anything. but it’s unnerving#might delete#Alan Wake 2 my beloved#so many times in that game it could’ve gone a direction that would’ve lessened or soured the story but somehow it didn’t lmao#more game spoilers but for ex: Alice coming back at the end instead of leaving it with her demise in the documentary#when I first saw that it was devastating. but also wasn’t sure what to feel if that’s how she’s gone from the story#having her actually manipulate her photos. become art to make Alan think she died. go to the dark place and help him and saga#that last video left me Speechless it was so good.#esp after how much I disliked Control (spoilers here) for quickly ending with Dylan in a coma and not much else.#could not be happier with how the AW2 ending played out and the clear love for all its characters#REALLY hope that Control 2 ends in a good or interesting place. give dylan some focus!#not tagging this bc I’m just yelling my thoughts. but knowing tumblr it will somehow be seen on every tag 😵💫
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t8's despair ending but there's an additional scene where kazuya finds out jun is alive via being served divorce papers
#they just get slapped on his desk by anna five seconds after his monologue#I love the kazjuns together sm but you can love someone and still have dealbreakers and cliff yeeting jin would be one imo#some things you just can't come back from + I think an AU scenario where they are messy pining exes could be fun#enemies to lovers to enemies 👁️#im not afraid to break up my ships and make them both miserable for the drama lol#what I want characters to be and what I'm willing to inflict on them for the sake of telling a story are 2 v different things
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hhhh talking about my writing was fun but 30 tags is not enough.. yes i have 3 major influences but i have minor ones too.. it is a lovechild of my favorite things.. writing is so fun and i have no self control or a concept of pacing myself i will sit there for 16 hours and get hit with every status effect but by god does it all just flow out of me. I've always been a music person yes but i also used to write a lot into early adulthood until The Incident™
but i am ready 2 jump back into it. i think comics are a great middle ground between the two mediums so i don't get As into writing bc i kind of started going crazy last time 🫡 i can take a more structured approach to it that forces me to pace myself and think about it differently. i love art.... i love making things i love knowing how to do things i love knowing how to play things i love having so many creative outlets, even if i don't do a lot of them regularly lol. it is enriching 😳 and nice to know that it's always there to come back to when u want.
#if u want the tea my imagination at the time was like i could space out and straight up just be another person POV doing every little#thing as if i were them for hours and the experience would come together without having to even think about it.#different times/places/contexts/conversations etc. forced 2 to to my mom's lil cult meetings for 2 hours twice a week#i would opt to do these imagination exercises instead to rly put myself in a character's perspective. every step‚ stumble‚#riding in a carriage together for the entirety from point A to B etc. WELL i was working on a horror anthology somewhere 18/19#(that had a small local following 🫶🏾) and it its concept was like the Twilight zone but a lot darker. it was called interdimensional#and the main recurring character never actually shows up in the story. they r an omnipresent god of death who exists everywhere but#exists outside of our realm‚ and it picks random people to reveal itself to as a symbol. it can be apparent or just in passing that#the entry's MC sees it in‚ it will appear on something somewhere and once it's brought up it's a cue to the reader that this person#has just been sent to an alternate reality that leads towards their inevitable death. for the character nothing ever changes immediately#but the different starts to creep its way in‚ as does death's approach at its crescendo but the path's i took to get there were 😨#and after enough entries i started to see the symbol irl and hallucinate some other stuff from my stories and it really scared me#and made me stop 🫡 but i think in retrospect i just went too hard on the imagination exercises and wished i tried cultivating it instead#give myself time to settle and get in control.. but alas‚ she has not written seriously since. to this day it still flows out of me if#i just sit down to do it‚ but i don't think I'm at risk of something like that happening again anymore :3 so yeah ♡ i am learning how to#draw and trying not 2 force it bc i want it to b fun as a little journey for me and i look forward to the day i can come back to actively#writing again too 🫶🏾 i miss it but i also want to b able to draw ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა#learn the hard thing first then do the stuff that comes naturally.... i also want to get back into music sometime but clearly i got a lot of#other stuff to work on 💀 i burnt myself out on it learning too many things and not having enough fun with it anymore‚#but i have a better healthier with art these days and i know it'll be great to come back to when I'm ready 😌💕#i have been considering getting an acoustic or bass guitar tho 🧐 the beauty of physical instruments.. they're just there ready 2 go..#I've been doing mostly digital the past few years‚ when i was making music. it was also rly hard to when i was w my ex ૮ – ﻌ–ა#that's a whole other rant lol. but ugh digital is like u gotta set it up u gotta make space and then u gotta be in one spot the whole time#i just wanna lay in bed and vibe or something yfm.. walk around maybe idk. do something less structured.#maybe.. hm. hmmm 🧐#I'm going to guitar center lol c ya ✌🏾 getting a bass and amp and maybe a guitar too depending on the price
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Uhgg I love my girlfriend.. she's so pretty and I don't get to talk about them enough. I want to talk about my angel, my heart, my very tall wife<33
#she's like a foot taller then me and I love it so much.#even if I'm cursed by short jokes#im so gay#I WANT TO BUY HER MORE FLOWERS BUT THE ONES I BOUGHT HER LAST ARE STILL GOOD AND HEALTHY#HOW DO I TELL HER I WANT HER FLOWERS TO DIE FASTER SO I CAN BUY HER MOREEE :[[#uhghh she feels the need to pay back unconditional gifts and I just wanna spoil them#tormented by my partners want to get a job. like- no baby it's okay I can support us!! just stay home or go out with your friends!!!#wish I could be my standard of husband in this economy. I need a better job 😞#like- it's okay love I'll work and when I come home I'll cook dinner and wash up everything afterwards :[[#You want a massage? ofc baby. not feeling well? I'm here love. Cute new dress or wanna get your nails done? take my card. treat yourself.#I wanna do more for them :[[ she's so sweet to me even after being mistreated by some dickwad ex. She deserves the world<3333#i miss my wife tails
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#bro why is everyone growing up and away and trying to figure out their lives and careers and loves#and im just sitting here missing them?#like sure im trying to figure out mine too we're all that age so I don't resent them for it#but why don't they miss me? why don't they feel empty when they haven't talked to me in a long time?#like. didn't they feel very light and happy after talking to me like i did with them don't they have a bad day and think that oh ill#talk to me and it will all feel okay even if it isn't just for a minute?#oh ny god i feel so pathetic asking this but like why am i suddenly crying now???#like my bestf. she's so busy in her new internship in mumbai that she can't be bothered to text me back#a simple yes no question for days. like i understand you have cool new office and work and friends and your stupid fucking ex#that you couldn't stop crying about to me living in that city with you but what about me? what about us?? what about you saying#that you're my first bestfriend i haven't told this to anyone else this is forever everyone else judges me but you're the best#like i just feel like if you're going to leave me then don't fucking say shit like that to me??#okay oh my god this is so irrational but i literally can't stop crying and it's definitely pms like i checked#she's not even leaving she's just suddenly busy and adjusting it's only been like a month#but i hate this stupid fucking knife like fear that as soon as someone is a little busy or seems like they're pulling away a little my#brain is like okay they hate me they're going to leave me so pack your bags we're leaving first#like i know a better solution would be to just tell her that hey dude i fucking miss you and i saw this show and remember how you used to#love peter kavinsky because he was adorable and i want to sit and watch it with you and just why aren't we back in school#where we are basically forced to hang out for like 7 hours because im so sick of only seeing you like once in 2 months for a few hours#like i know it's not your fault and we're just growing up and in different directions but just please like five more minutes can you stay#i don't even have the confidence to say anything to her lol she's my only friend like if even she gets mad and leaves#but i know that's not how healthy relationships work. and ugh my sister is so fucking far away i can feel it everyday#in the 5 and a half hour time difference. i hate this i hate everyone everyone has to go so far away#i hate living in this empty fucking house and being responsible for my own emotions fuck this isse accha toh living with dad hi hai#atleast when im there there are only 2 emotions anxiety and boredom. now i have a whole house to myself to cry whenever I need#for however long i need in a locked room. really looking forward to adulting haha i can see just see myself succeeding so well🙄#man this is crazy im gonna go do jumping jacks or something so this comes and goes faster#umm#dni
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the forest looks like heaven today i woke up feeling the heaviest weight at the top of my heart
#yesterday on the study they said they were dating two others and it was going well and i cant imagine fucking you but#you have great tits. they got upset at me not inviting them to a party. my research partner told me to write a 1000 word essay on why they#should come. they spoke about how much they wanted theiir ex and they wouldnt tell me much about who theyre dating bc#they thought i still had feelings for them which. god. theyre right but the assumption is so arrogant#the streams r rly beautiful im walking to a date and shes gorgeous and some of my friends know her but i look#exactly like ive slept on my friends floor for the past few days so . aaa anyway#god after that whole call i just felt so deflated like i felt over it but now its all . back. like seeing them being happy w smn else#inflicts active misery upon me which means ii think im becoming a worse person bc of them. i called my friend and i just . idk i walked home#i kept wanting to weep but . woah the sun is so pretty#there are petals and dandelion seeds floating in the air#med school students walking to their lectures#she does biochem btw. the person im meeting now#there are two butterflies dancing together. i cant make this shit up the past few days have looked like actual heaven#ive spent them being on survival mode and not even bc of my studies like ok focus on log functions while the person kn the screen#tells u abt how if her ex were to call shed fold immediately and the new girl is a singer and its going well and maybe ill tell you#more abt it in a few months. SO YOU KNOW IT HURTS ! SO WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME YOUD MAKE OUT W ME AT THE CLUB WHY WOULD U FALL ASLEEP NEXT TO#ME WITHOUT CLOTHES ON ! WHY WOULD YOU CARESS YOUR OWN SKIN LOOKING AT ME IN THE MIRROR !!!!#anyway im like . sane.#i just . felt like it was over#i realised i kept seeing ppl who i thought were more attractive etc etc than her bc i needed to prove to myself#that im attractive enough to be liked or that i can be liked at all and a part of me wanted to prove it to them too#its just a horrible mindset to have and yh not only do they not care but they also bring out the worst in me actively like . I DONT KNOW#BUT THEN WHO ELSE KNOWS THAT THE GOLDEN HOURS IN TEHRAN ARE PINK AND LILAC WHO GOES TO TECHNO RAVES AT THE BASE OF DAMAVAND#WHO CAN PIN YOU AGAINST A WALL LIKE THEM !!!#anyway#standing up it just feels so#exhausting#like this the most exhausted ive felt from all this ever
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I am scheming something delightfully fun in the way of homebrew oneshots
#for context. me and my mom moved back in august. we’re still working on gettinf the house together and decorating it. and its taking a while#bc she works a lot bc financial strain of new house and divorcing her shitty ex husband and im in college so im not home very much#but we have a designated game room bc we’re avid ttrpg players#and we’re planning on putting in stalagtites and making it look like a cave#and last night we were talking abt how we’d do sessions using the backyard since the gameroom has a door to outside#and talking abt making d20s in little plastic boxes so you could roll for combat + stuff by just shaking the box#and having little compartments in the staligtites for them or for game props and notes#and i started spitballing some way to do like an improv murder mystery with having game notes for the players in thsoe compartments#and their like. character roles/archetypes randomly assigned by where they sit#and then have a whole oneshot game of clue where each of the players have like a stack of cards they can play to get revelations from the dm#or flashbacks to scenes that the characters have to play out (the victim fighting with one of the suspects in the kitchen or smth)#and have branching paths with multiple outcomes#and they have to come back to the game room to make accusations and then the accused can play an alibi card or smth!!!#i guess i could also do that before the game room is completely finished since we’d be all over the house and yard#itd be so fun tho. plans for when im off for the summer or after i finish my degree#sev rambles
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John saying in the Jan 30th press conference that Shah Rukh is not an actor anymore he's an emotion and so he (John) almost went in for a kiss several times during filming... i can die in peace now drape the pride flag over my coffin
#film: pathaan#pathaan#srk#shah rukh khan#john abraham#bollywood#local gay watches Bollywood.txt#YRF it seems i will not have to sue you after all#'[John speaking] the songs feature one of the most beautiful men and the most beautiful woman'#he knows!!!#they know!!!#also SRK calling their little group Amar Akbar Anthony... in reference to the '77 film... with Deepika as Amar and John as Anthony...#i almost cried i'm soft 🥺#that and him saying he's open to coming back for Pathaan 2 were some of the best moments htg#anyway have we agreed that this is a polyam situation#i mean the 'this is my boyfriend and my boyfriend's boyfriend' type situation#bonus points if we include 'and my boyfriend's ex-boyfriend and his boyfriend but the ex is relative and they're all still dating'#bc yk i have the Kabir x Pathaan friends-with-benefits plot line set up and with the immortal Khalid plot line you can pry those two#out of my cold dead hands
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i mean i should probably stop saying shit just to be mean
#on the other hand....#the social environment cultivated on here almost demands it lest i let people walk all over me#definitely one of those skills i picked up in childhood to survive social situations back then#not a great skill. not even one i particularly like using. in fact i hate this part of me that feels the need to be judgemental#the logical part of me- the more ~~evolved~~ part of my spirit you could say knows its stupid and has hated doing it since forever#i completely stopped for a while. and then my abusive ex did all the shit they did so i felt like i had to dig that judgemental asshole sid#back up to defend myself bc ik thats the level they operate on. but it also started being the level a lot of ppl on here operated on soon#after (and im not entirely unconvinced they weren't an influence as to why people became more of an asshole on here)#(them or twitter. probably a mix of both but mostly twitter users coming here lol. also had to be an ass on twitter to survive)#so now i feel like i have to cling on to this side of myself i was more than happy to let rot in the dirt bc if i dont then people are gonn#use my vulnerability and niceness and lack of desire to use ad hom n shit against me so they can bully and abuse me and say whatever#and i have to keep this image up of being unphased and happy all the time and then i snap and then its a whole problem to people#so basically be nothing ever bc ppl on here will think thats you forever moral of story i guess im not sure.#best advice i can give: dont exist online publicly in any significant way. if you wanna be a pfpless. bioless account that is your god give#fuckin right okay. never are you obligated to be part of this shit and im personally telling you its hell and if i knew then what i knew#now i would have never started coming on to tumblr in the first place. its cool i learned about all this queer stuff or whatever but it#sucks otherwise#tumblr. twitter. insta. any social media where the point is to make posts and write posts more than anything else#dont bother. so much is lost in text-style communication. bridging gaps is nearly impossible. you will always be misunderstood#i think thats the case for most vocal communication but ESPECIALLY digitally
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this goes out to my fellow girlies who missed out on enjoying the spooky season to the fullest because of work responsibilities (it's me I'm the girlie) 🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️
original image under the cut >>>
#anyways howdy y'all we back SDKJFSNDFS#I've been trapped in some perpetual work for the past two weeks (that I Couldn't skimp on due to contractual obligations :'D)#but I'm finally free to draw and relax between working days again !!! Thank Arceus 😩😩😩💫💫💫#I still have my freelance job to attend to but! I'll have more chances to work on my own personal projects and be more active as a whole :}#and you know what that means for Destiny Bond............... heheheheheeeee..................................#I'll make a proper teaser post for that within the week once I get a good forecast on my schedule 💃💃💃#for now please enjoy my excuse to doodle fall Morty because I love him so........ I missed him so much y'all have no idea.......... 😭🤲💕#I planned a full piece with him and Eusine together but oh my god that one gig I had completely shattered those earlier plans SKJDFSKNDFS#but in my eyes . spooky season never ends . so I'll come to do it anyways sometime after the next DB update simply because I Can 🫵#gym leader morty#morty pokemon#fall morty#pokemon#pokemon masters#pokemon masters ex#pmex#pokemon gsc#pokemon hgss#pokemon art#fluff draws !!!#doodle
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Without getting too much into detail the thought of my ex trying to contact me again is a huge-ass nightmare scenario to me but at least it's unlikely he'll try again atp. I have also gotten panicked over the worry that he might worm his way back into the spaces I'm in and I'd have to like, end up explaining The Lore to people I have gotten to know but who weren't around for it. So they know I'm not just being a dick to some random guy if it were to ever come up. Which like, actually it's really funny to me that the current fixation I have is adjacent to an interest I know he had. I don't know if that'd translate into him ending up in the little fandom circle I've carved out but if it did I'd probably throw up and cry Lol.
#ventings#emetophobia#the adjacent thing comes from newgrounds thats all i wanna say#i hate talking abt my ex publicly just cuz i feel like im jinxing myself into having him show back up. eugh#i might see if i can talk to my bestie abt the specifics i kinda wanna. just share these thoughts with someone#and im not close to a lot of people ! and itd be easiest with my bestie cuz he was There for like. the whole thing#they know just how much it like. messes with me. god im still so fucking. thankful for when she was up so fucking late#with me talking to me after we broke up past fucking midnight#i still remember being awake through the night until 7am and it was awful but they were there. literally the most important#person in my life FUCK IM TEARING UP THINKING ABOUT IT ALL. they deserve an award for putting up w 13-14 y/o me
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