#But seriously projecting much?
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why do you vagueblog so much? are you a coward?
Why do you anon so much? Are you a coward?
Also, no, I'm just lazy and don't care enough to have the argument, usually. It's called venting. Trying it would probably do wonders for your mental health.
#Rolling My Eyes#Asked and Answered#But seriously projecting much?#What kind of question is this?#Since when are you owed context? Just leave if you don't like my blog#Kylia Points and Laughs at Morons
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It will forever be hilarious to me that Disney wanted so fucking bad to make a Wicked movie — but couldn't get the rights from Universal — that they literally spent billions upon billions of dollars making SEVEN different films (and a whole season of television; not even including their sequels and spinoffs) more than one of which they even got Idina and Kristen to be in based on the stripped-down premise of "what if the Stock Female Antagonist™ was secretly the Misunderstood Angsty Girlboss Heroine™ all along?" (because Disney execs don't actually care about Wicked, they just saw Green, said "hey! if we can't get the real thing, why not use Our Own (and/or Public Domain) characters?" and simply followed the Marketing Department Road all the way to the bank).
Less funny is the fact they were so successful at it — regardless of the merits (or lack thereof) of any of those projects — that it ended up getting the production of the actual Wicked movie delayed by more than a decade (because it would ironically have looked like a copycat and probably faded into the background if it had come out back when Disney was pumping out knockoffs every fucking year).
#seriously though#wicked lived in bob iger's head rent free#like its insane the lengths they went to just to ride its coat tails#they made so much content that nobody thinks of them as brazen attempts to emulate wicked anymore#frozen / into the woods / oz the great and powerful / maleficent / cruella / descendants / once upon a time / etc.#and this isnt even speculation#the production teams have been open about this from the beginning#disney couldn't acquire wicked so they just used its keywords as a template for mass producing “original” projects#some of which went on to become among the most successful films ever made#like they really said “okay what if we just got idina menzel and hired a Broadway composer to give her a Defying Gravity” AND IT WORKED#wicked#wicked movie#disney#gelphie#elphaba x glinda#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#glinda x elphaba#elphaba#glinda#wizard of oz#the wizard of oz
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Happy 3/7day 🥰~! 'One day we'll look back on all these memories and smile about it'
Process + detail:
#my art#sasunaru#sns#sasuke x naruto#sasunaru day#sasunaru fanart#I'll post this for now since it's a special day~#but I'm seriously going to think about this whole art posting...#regarding ai and all#I mentioned it briefly before#but ai literally ruined the 2 biggest projects I was asked to work on#and another that I was going to work on#I had another opportunity here where I was going to get paid#for drawings somewhat regularly#but instead the offer changed to paying for my art#only to be trained for ai#so that didn't happen either#I shall not complain too much#I'm just amazed at the careless way some talk about it#because IT IS ruining lives and careers#ai IS already very advanced#:((
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thank you for a great art fight! here's some of my final attacks. had a blast, already missing it - see you next year!
#my art#art fight#artfight#artfight2024#anthro#monster#furry#genuinely already missing it i always feel a bit empty for the first few days after art fight ends#it takes up SO much of my free time in july nowadays like july is just the art fight month. to me#hoping to fill the void by doing something that's been eating away at me for years at this point#which is to start taking some of my oc projects more seriously.....and start developing them into something...#i know i can (probably) never make money off my ocs but i think i will start eating my hands off if i don't try to tell their stories#all fun and games but also it's like an obsession 2 me i love my characters....i love them...#and unfortunately i most love my least marketable characters#but whatever i'm sure there will be a couple people who care#feel like i'm at a crossroads and i'm picking the least desirable path but also there's some release in that....#i need to follow that advice that's like make art for yourself and five other likeminded freaks#anyway i'm rambling.....again....it's what i do in the tags
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I think it’s more well known that Rui used to perform alone in public without anyone stopping to watch his shows, but something I never see mentioned is how Emu says she was performing without audiences at the Wonder Stage before finding Tsukasa. She wasn’t completely alone because I assume she, at the very least, had the mascot performing with her since she says “we” but EmuRui have alot in common here as characters who were determined to pursue their passions regardless of if they actually had support from others or if things weren’t going the way they hoped. Even after wxs temporarily disbanded, Rui was immediately back to performing his own shows the very next day and Emu had been making shows at the Wonder Stage despite not getting an audience and her family thinking her efforts to save it were a waste.
It just makes me… so very sad. Rui spending countless hours building robots and writing storylines, going out and narrating his performance until the end despite no one listening. Emu coming to the ending of her play with no one in the Wonder Stage seats to watch. It must have been so disheartening for them both… But still, neither of them gave up.
#EmuRui seriously makes me so sick….. i could say so much more#txt#emu#rui#project sekai#wxs#emurui#save me emuchan
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youtube
Hey everyone!! Look what's premiering in one hour!!!
This project was so much fun!!! Everyone did amazing with their parts PLEASE go check out the video description for everyone's socials and show them some love!! We all worked super hard on this and hope you enjoy it as much as we do!! 。・゚・(ノ▽`)・゚・。
#destiny#destiny 2#destiny fanart#fanart#fan art#destiny fan art#art#animation#multi animator project#destiny 2 animation#destiny animation#oc#original character#2d animation#seriously though this took so much work please go give everyone some love!!!#go back to work lukas#Youtube
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few bive sketches i did yesterday night
#regretevator#regretavator fanart#regretevator fanart#regretevator bive#bive fanart#regretevator split#split x bive#split#bive#spive regretevator#spive#SHE LOVES YOU#she's just like me fr#no seriously#it's kind of scary how much i relate to her#split fanart#did this while heavily projecting#so sorgy for the somewhat nonsensical text#JUST NOTICED I MISSED HER SHARP TEETH#OOPSIE
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Hc that Cole gets horrible stomach aches for a variety of reasons and it leaves him wallowing away in misery in his bed with a hot water bottle on his stomach not even being able to eat
Kai is often used as said water bottle and every time it happens Cole makes him promise he won’t tell anyone about his pain and Kai swears he won’t. But Kai that mf had his finger crossed and typing Zane as they speak. Five minutes later Zane has put together what might be causing the stomach pains and a solution.
If it takes a while for the solution to kick in and get rid of the pains, Jay, Nya and Lloyd all switch on who would be entertaining Cole. Whenever Cole is awake and feeling like he wants to do something but literally can’t because of the pain, they send in Jay who watches shows and theorises with Cole.
When Cole is tired and is in a serious need of sleep they send in Lloyd to nap with him because he is seriously the best cuddle buddy you can squeeze him and he will squeeze back. And when Cole is awake and bored but tired at the same time, they send in Nya to have the most meaningless but sweet conversations about nothing and everything, sometimes even sitting in silence.
Zane join in at random just to keep company and make sure Cole’s stomach isn’t about to eat him instead, and Kai is there the whole time silently laying on Cole’s stomach in complete bliss.
Wu has to keep reminding them that he has magic teas for these problems.
#lego ninjago#ninjago#ninjago cole#cole ninjago#cole brookstone#wu loves these losers but seriously#he has the tea for it#use it dammit#ninjago wu#ninjago lloyd#ninjago kai#ninjago zane#ninjago jay#ninjago nya#nya smith#nya jiang#kai smith#kai jiang#lloyd garmadon#jay walker#zane julien#stomach ache#YES THIS IS ME PROJECTING I AM IN PAINNNNN#so much pain and it 2am and im so tired
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... but your MIND will be SCARRED FOREVER-
Little something for a class competition 👀✨
#silent hill#silent hill 2#james sunderland#fanart#my art#csp#silent hill 2 remake#sh2 remake#sh2 james#some seriously good works were submitted so this is more just bc id be angry with myself if i didnt join#as you can tell i havent been drawing much lately (havent been drawing st all really)#but i got a creative kick from one project im in so 👀✨!! high hopes for being more back :³
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tsukasa tenma has ADHD!! except it's an actual analysis because 1. look at my url 2. i'm mentally unwell (and i started to love tsukasa mostly because i immediately recognized my ADHD traits in him). which is a thing i should probably leave for ADHD awareness month, HOWEVER!! it was my birthday yesterday and i wanted to spoil myself (i just kinda overlooked how much time writing it from scratch would take me, so i'm a bit late with it). and i reaaally don't wanna wait until november when i finally wrote it down because i'm so HYPED because i was preparing for it like what? two years? somewhere around it. and that's a LONG time.
please keep in mind that i'm no psychologist, psychiatrist nor a neurologist and while i do use some sources (cannot really confirm if they are true, though... because i forgot to write credits down... so i'm really sorry for that), most of this analysis was just based off on my personal experiences with the disorder (and i don't really have the full professional knowledge of what i struggle with i'm just a Boy). i mean, i am analyzing a character from a hatsune miku game. i think i'm already putting way too many effort than i should.
also the examples of tsukasa's behavior here are not all of the things, because i wrote down only the things i remember off from the top of my head. sorry, guys. my hyperactive ass is not sitting thru all the stories again just to get my crumbs, unfortunately.
anyways, with this a little bit unprofessional and messy introduction, let's get it started!
1. THE MAIN PART OF THIS WHOLE THING, AKA HOW THE ADHD SYMPTOMS CORRESPOND TO TSUKASA'S BEHAVIOR
i wanted to write it down in my own words, but i think the screen above has summed it up perfectly; there are some established symptoms of ADHD, but to be an ADHDer you don't have to experience them all. and this is going to explain why i'm gonna show a lot of these symptoms later, yet gonna connect only some of them with tsukasa. it's only these i have evidence for, and yet i think they're good enough to point at tsukasa and already say woah! an ADHDer!!
in short, there are three types of ADHD: hyperactive, inattentive (ADD) and combined. the combined one is the most common iirc, so that's also what i'm going to focus on today. especially since for a rep of the other types, i could say that shizuku's a rather great representation of ADD — but that's not the point of my ted talk today, so i'm not going to go into the detail about it. i'm sure some momojan or shizuku oshi would do better than me in this field, so i'm leaving it to the experts.
these are the symptoms that i managed to gather — the first two screens being about the symptoms viewed in children, the last one being about the symptoms viewed in adults. "in which one of them tsukasa belongs to?" that's a good question, because i actually don't know. calling a high schooler a child doesn't sit quite right with me, yet a freshly turned 17/18-years-old is not exactly an adult, either (although most of the symptoms i'm analyzing come from these that are viewed in adults). and while i do think tsukasa has more of the symptoms viewed in adults, we're gonna analyse them all! because i'm putting my all into this.
FORGETFULNESS
i believe there's not much left to say, as this is the most obvious one and everyone already knows that. even though it's not touched that much anymore for some reason, tsukasa's forgetfulness is his very apparent trait. it varies in severity a lot of times: from him basically forgetting both his childhood and true feelings in the main story to him, for example, forgetting his own phone and lunch (in the same day!!) in hinamatsuri. even saki in the same event, while they were arguing, called him a "big, dumb forgetter" and assumed that he forgot what happened the day he brought her the hinamatsuri dolls to hospital. while forgetting basically half of your life is not exactly normal and can be a sign of something bigger, like dissociative amnesia, his forgetting of just the ordinary things and it happening a lot definitely still fits this trait.
EXCESSIVE TALKING/PHYSICAL MOVEMENT
while this is something that you'd rather connect to emu (and for a good reason), it's not like tsukasa is completely devoid of it either; he talks a lot. he moves a lot. it's not on emu's level of hyperactivity, but it's also not "a lot" that's taken as a social norm, based on how the people around him react. he's putting the 1 in oddball 1 2, after all.
in holy night or some side stories connected to it (it might be meiko's side story? but i'm not exactly sure) it was also said that tsukasa moves in his sleep a lot to this point that his parents have to leave his christmas presents under his door instead of next to his bed.
oh, and he also talks to himself a lot. even in class, which was confirmed in chapter 6 of dazzling (or maybe even earlier, it's just the one moment that i remember). (but i'll get to this moment later on)
he says his long monologues, he strikes his poses at every occasion — and while i don't think that's the first thing you think of when you have "excessive talking/movement" in mind, for me it sure does count as it.
LITTLE OR NO SENSE OF DANGER
this point can seem rather weird, because "isn't tsukasa always riddiculed at rui's weird inventions"? well, yeah, he is, that is not a thing to deny. but he also agrees to try out most of them, if not all, if it's for the sake of the show. he's aware of what can happen, but he also doesn't back away if it means that he'll be one step closer to achieving his dream of stardom.
does it count as "little sense of danger"? well, i'm actually not sure, for me it doesn't, but maybe for someone it does. i'd say that's a rather weak point, but i wanted to include the explanation for the counterpoint of it — that's why i even mentioned it in the first place. i don't have a lot to say about this tbh.
update: oh, actually no, wait, i just remembered. remember how tsukasa in phoenix decided to not eat anything for three days just to be able to resonate with rio, while also having to do straining exercise on top of that? you certainly cannot say that's a safe thing to do, but he still went along with that in order to get the role. it makes me come to a conclusion that tsukasa actually has a sense of danger, but sometimes chooses to willingly ignore it if only it makes him get closer to fulfilling his dream. i think it's coming close enough to the little/no sense of danger to be actually considered an ADHD trait.
DIFFICULTY KEEPING QUIET
while i'm not sure if what i'm going to talk about is a difficulty keeping quiet in a traditional sense of way, it definitely counts as it, somehow: tsukasa is loud. like, really loud. and that's another obvious fact both for us and for characters in-universe, especially when thinking of tsukasa shiho's first thought is that he's kinda noisy, which can be seen in the "a friend's brother" 1koma. (and probably a lot of other cases. free shiho.)
tsukasa doesn't seem to realize that he's way louder than he should be and that him being loud is his first impression in most of the cases, though, or at least i don't remember any moment where it happens (and it's a possibility. then that's on me, i guess.). and yeah, i know what's the reason for it, obviously — he's supposed to be a comic relief character. because wansho's stories are mostly supposed to make you smile, as this is what wansho's aspiration is. however, as much as being intended to make the viewer laugh it wouldn't be, it still is a part of tsukasa's character, and a rather important one on top of that. his constant loudness is something that's definitely not considered normal by the society and could very well fit into this symptom.
and since i promised to elaborate on the mentioned before scene from dazzling chapter 6: when tsukasa talks to himself in class, it always ends up to be loud. and it already happened a few times.
(tl by tsukasa's #3 fan on youtube because i don't have proseka on my phone wah)
if it's not a difficulty keeping quiet, then i don't know what is. bro can scream up to 120dB as measured by robonene for god's sake.
IRRITABILITY/QUICK TEMPER
again, this is something that was more apparent with early game tsukasa, maybe he just got medicated. idk man. but even if it happened three, almost four years ago, it still happened, i don't make the rules. back in the early game, tsukasa was really easily losing his temper and getting annoyed, mad even — i mean, that was the whole point of the main story argument: tsukasa's first response to nene accidentally messing up their show, which was not even her fault, was to shout at her. and while this was obviously very important thing to him and being upset at this is a rather understandable reaction, taking this as far as screaming at a poor girl for not being to face the audience because of her anxiety is not something a person who can control their anger would do.
it could be also easily seen by his reaction to emu and rui's antics back in the early game, which were often stained with irritation.
another example is his hinamatsuri argument with saki, where, despite loving her so much, he still got slightly mad at her for not liking the new dolls he bought her. he started to regret his harsh words and actions soon enough, obviously, but it doesn't change the fact that it was rather easy for him to get him across.
INABILITY TO DEAL WITH STRESS
if i'm not mistaken, tsukasa has once said something along the lines of "is it anxiety? there's no way a star like me would feel anxiety" — but i cannot recall for the love of my life in which story it appeared, so i don't want to take it as a face value when i don't have a solid proof for it.
other than this vague mention of "something that's in the story but i don't remember where", i'll admit, i don't really have anything backing me up for this tbf. i mean, i guess maybe tsukasa doing his best to appear strong as a child to not worry his parents could work? because the stress of saki being in the hospital definitely was also present here, although i just see this more as a coping mechanism for his situation than a reaction to stress, so that's not a solid evidence either.
so, yeah. take this one with a grain of salt, actually.
from the symptoms that weren't listed here, i remember reading something about people with ADHD enjoying to show off more, which is certainly what tsukasa does often — and while it actually applies to me too, it wasn't on an english site so i didn't screenshot it and i cannot really find it anywhere in english... so even though i treat it just like my whole argument for the inability to deal with stress, i thought it's just worth mentioning.
however, there is obviously one more thing...
HYPERFIXATION/SPECIAL INTEREST
obviously, i'm talking about acting here: for tsukasa, acting aligns with all these criterias. it is his deep passion; it is something highly engaging for him; it is sometimes all-consuming for him; he tunes out the world around him when he thinks about how can he possibly improve his acting (see: the dazzling moment i showed earlier. yeah, i like to use it as a backing point a lot, as you can see.); and it is something that is his life-long interest.
is it his special interest or his hyperfixation, though? well, it's hard to tell...? because while according to screen two, spinterest revolves around a topic and hyperfixation revolves around an activity, so it would qualify what tsukasa feels towards acting as a hyperfixation, it's still kinda hard for me to call it so because of its length. yes, screen three clearly says that hyperfixation can last years, but they mostly revolve around shorter periods of time, after all (my longest hyperfixation was just a year long, for example). i think it's up to you to determine whether you'd call tsukasa's love for acting a hyperfixation or a special interest, but it's something from these two most certainly.
i'm also a big fan of the headcanon that tsukasa's other spinterest is kaito ww it's in no way a canon evidence (unfortunately!), but kaito's 1* side story, where tsukasa and emu are watching kaito's show and tsukasa is explaining to her why kaito's wearing a scarf somewhat implies that tsukasa knew a thing or two about kaito before the main story. and i'm all for it. colopale let tsukasa be a kaito fanboy pleaseee.
2. I REALLY LIKE ANALYZING SONGS, IF YOU CAN'T TELL
those who have already read a few of my things probably know what i love to do the most — analyzing songs!! so i wouldn't be myself if i just left tsukasa's commisions without analyzing them under the angle of neurodivergence, especially since the sole reason i became obsessed with the thought of ADHD tsukasa was that one sekahaji line (there's too much noise, so much noise and it keeps getting worse you will always be famous).
of course, remember that only the world hasn't even started yet should be taken as a canon value! producers are often given space to do whatever they want in the lyrics of the songs they are commissioned for, so they're not canonical in any way. i think it's still fun to look at their lyrics and ramble about them for a bit, though. i've already got too carried away anyways.
won't be posting photos of the lyrics since i'd hit the images limit, but you can check them yourself — all the translations i'm taking, as always, from the vocaloid lyrics wiki. (since filament fever has two tls on there, i want to clarify that i've only looked at and considered in my analysis the official english one, because it's, well, official.)
THE WORLD HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET
besides the mentioned earlier there's too much noise, so much noise and it keeps getting worse, which i think of as a representation of overstimulation (since i used to see people asking "oh but why tsukasa has something about there being too much noise in a song made out of his feelings when he's such a loud person himself". because he likes the noise he makes, not the overwhelming, overstimulating noise from the outside!!), sekahaji also has a rather good amount of quotes that could be read as something connected to neurodivergence (based on the fact that it's not supposed to be a song about this topic): the main theme of these are procrastination, which can be seen in let's cross the end of all of this, partying forever and the world hasn't even started yet line itself. the thought of the world not even starting implies that there's still a lot of time left to do something, while "partying forever" can refer to deciding to give up on doing the things you should do and going to drown in something that indulges only you and yourself for the rest of eternity. while procrastination is not counted as an official ADHD symptom, it's a trait that people with the disorder very often have (for reasons obvious).
other lines, which i couldn't entirely fit into a box of a certain symptom, are there's too much conflict, so much conflict and it keeps growing (a parallel line to the noise one, so it means something! right) and let's break the plans for a harmonious future. in my personal interpretation, they both can be viewed as your typical neurodivergent struggle in a neurotypical society — "too much conflict" refering to an internal struggle of not being completely normal, while the "harmonious future" that's going to get broken are just the social norms that are going to be broken because of an off-putting, neurodivergent behavior. something that some neurotypical people dooon't really like.
TONDEMO-WONDERZ
since i've just talked about breaking the social norms, "why?!" and "do it like this!!" aren't like you, huh? line from tondemo-wonderz is going to go first, because it revolves around the same topic. it's the same case: it's about (subconscious, not intentional) fighting what's accepted by the society by just being yourself — because you're neurodivergent, you're different.
from the other lines in tondemo-wonderz, i have only one and it's take an eraser to your memories?!, which is pretty much self explanatory. as always, a mention of forgetting something in tsukasa's commision. who would've thought.
88 SHOOTING STARS
another self explanatory line that i have written down as first: it's okay if you only remember a little part of it sometimes. another mention of tsukasa forgor™, and while it corresponds with what happened in dazzling, it's still a line mentioning forgetfulness — so it's worth mentioning.
aren't we just inevitably going around in circles? and it's okay if you take a rest for a little bit sometimes can be interpreted as another mention of procrastination and while it's not that apparent as it was with sekahaji, because going in circles can refer to something else and taking a rest sometimes is not a bad thing at all, i still wanted to mention them here. for the record.
you ought to slip and fall in panic in the final moment is connected to a symptom that i showed, yet didn't elaborate on it (because i didn't have anything to work with) — making careless mistakes. the same case, yet with another symptom goes with is this not enough yet again? is this not how it's supposed to be? couldn't we go even further than this?, which can be seen as a reflection of unability to listen to instructions. a bit of reaching with this one (like this whole part damn), but as i said earlier: for the record, i'm leaving it here. to show that i had some intense thoughts.
tbf, when i think about it now, maybe the mentioned earlier "why?!" and "do it like this!!" aren't like you [...] could very well fit this symptom too.
MR SHOWTIME
mr showtime you will always be famous, because this is a song that gave me a looot of things to work with. i was so flabbergasted when i read these lyrics for the first time. tsukasa tenma why are you like this. /aff
there are a lot of lines hinting being easily distracted, and these are basically the very first ones, too: you know what? i just can't make up my mind, it's so messed up that i can't put my thoughts together and a merry-go-round (my thought process) goes round and round are all about it. like you cannot deny it this time, if it's not about being unable to stay focused then i really don't know what is [insert the tsukasa don't look away stamp here because i love it and it's my biggest motivation to actually focus whenever i do something]. the more i mess around and waste time, the more i become hungry / and i can't handle it can be seen as about procrastination again, and even not "can be seen", it's literally being frustrated at yourself for wasting time, that's the sole outcome of a procrastination!! being bothered by feeling anxious, meanwhile, is resonating with the inability to deal with stress once again.
also jumping the gun. driving in a zigzag manner can actually connected with the little to no sense of danger. because, as far as i'm aware, driving in a zigzag manner is certainly not a safe activity. don't do it at home.
from the symptoms that i haven't yet mentioned to this point, am i taking a long way? am i making a fruitless effort? can be reflecting difficulty organizing tasks — since the poor planning of your activities can make you take a long way and can make you do a fruitless effort. then, where's the fun in taking shortcuts all the time? can be read along the lines of something coming close to extreme impatience and while a person that's extremely impatient would actually enjoy taking the shortcuts to get closer to their goal or destination, said impatience can be also connected with the desire for something interesting to happen. a task can make you impatient not because it's long, but because it's simply boring — avoiding shortcuts can make it less boring, even if it extends its duration. with this explanation, it makes the unexpectedness (unexpected program) is the best part of the show (my life) perfectly fit into this category, even though i wouldn't call this line a sign of impatience on its own.
i have some issues with i'm pathetic. i can't satisfy myself, because... at first i thought of connecting it with either mood swings or inability to deal with stress, however i'm not sure if that's really it. i'm pretty sure it connects to neurodivergence in some way, but i just can't put my finger on it, so... i'm just leaving it here for the record, once again.
oh, and there's also i got lost in the world (stage) and / the end credits rolled (the curtain fell), which also is pretty much summing up the experience of being neurodivergent in the neurotypical society. in the middle of trying to stay true to yourself and having to mask just to be accepted, it's easy to get lost — and once you do so, there's no going back. the curtain falls.
to end this part of the analysis, i'd show the lyrics from filament fever and sekai wo terasu tetrad here. i won't do this, however, and the reason for it is fairly simple — they don't give me much material to work with and i'm not really surprised, because mr showtime has succesfully sucked all of the neurodivergent coded lyrics into itself. there just won't be another song like mr showtime, i fear.
i can just say that in filament fever there is running away from the flow of time — which got me thinking of either procrastination and unability to stick to time-consuming tasks, with the former being more plausible as a potential interpretation... but that would be it.
3. NAKAYAMA IS A METAPHOR FOR NEURODIVERGENT MASKING AND IT'S THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER SAID BUT YOU HAVE TO HEAR ME OUT ON THIS
listen, i know how it sounds.
i'm not actually a fan of trying to fit every thing a character does into a box of a metaphor, symbol or allegory, i really am not. i think some things should just stay as simple as they are, but this thought has been bothering me ever since i've first seen spoilers of what's happening in a story where you're the star for the very first time. i'm in no way saying it has any canonical meaning, but i just thought it would be fun to include. because maaaybe someone sees my vision.
for those who haven't seen tsukasa4 yet or want to have a recap of what has happened in it: the whole event story revolves around tsukasa trying to grasp his role (as always). wxs got recommended to shunmei-za by shousuke and went there to practice their acting skills, immediately getting thrown onto the preparation for their next performance. tsukasa, however, is not a lead this time — he got the role of a supporting character and has got basically three lines to say on stage total. since tsukasa's used to playing lead roles, he obviously has issues with grasping the role — it's hard to use method acting in regards of a character that says three sentences total and nothing more. with help of bakuno reki, one of the actors in shunmei-za, and the rest of wxs, he manages to create a portrayal of nakayama that would make him "come to life" and "be a protagonist of his own story", something that would make it easier for him to get into role, however...
he gets a little bit too carried away with his acting during the actual performance.
and this is not something that would ruin the whole play, obviously, he's just a supporting character, the less invested audience would probably forgot about his impact on the story after five minutes of his last appearance — but he still made a slip-up. he still resonated with his role, but didn't achieve the utmost perfection. he still did well acting, after all, he managed to receive praise from the director in the end... but it's still a very apparent mistake that was made.
(tl, once again, by the awesome tsukasa's #3 fan)
and that's where the nakayama masking metaphor theory (it's not even a theory but it sounds cooler this way) comes in.
nakayama is supposed to be just a man. from what we know about him, he's in his late twenties and works as an editor — and even though tsukasa makes up a whole backstory for him later on, he's still supposed to be ordinary. nothing special. he's coming nowhere near the other roles that tsukasa has played, he's not on the same level as miles, torpe and rio. and while you could possibly consider torpe and rio as rather ordinary, they still had something interesting to happen to them, the main reason why they were lead roles for their respective plays. in the tsukasa4 play, nakayama has nothing like that. he's literally just a guy, he's normal. and "normal" is a keyword here.
tsukasa did everything he could to fit into nakayama's role. he followed the script, he took the advice from a more talented and professional actor that is bakuno, he didn't do any mistakes during his preparations — and yet he still managed to mess up in the end. why?, besides of the fact that he just let himself become one with nakayama during the performance and it resulted in a supporting character outshining the lead?
if we take as a fact that tsukasa is, in fact, neurodivergent, it would make sense that he's having troubles with playing a normal person — because he's not exactly normal either. and this would very well work out as a metaphor of masking; even when you try your best, even when you mask yourself perfectly, you can still make slip-ups. you can still accidentally drop the act in middle of something that absolutely required it, or, similiar to what tsukasa did, can accidentally overdo it and end up perceived as even more weird than you'd be without masking. something something i got lost in the world and the end credits rolled. rings a bell?
and i'm not saying that tsukasa has a problem with masking, because he doesn't. he tries his best to pass as a normal member of society, but he also makes no effort in actively masking his weirdness (or else he wouldn't be a part of oddball one two). however, if you want to neurodivergent code your character, it would make sense to include a possibility of it in some way, right? especially since wxs stories' already had the theme of dealing with being perceived as weird (eg. rui's whole backstory, obviously). even if it's not affecting tsukasa directly, i think it would be cool to include something that indicates this issue's existence in his story and, in a way, his struggles.
however, as i said earlier, this is a very stupid thought and that's why i left it for the very end. i don't actually think that how tsukasa played nakayama was supposed to be a metaphor for masking, it's just a pure coincidence that it could be interpreted like that when you think about it too much.
aaand with this, we've finally come to an end!! (finally. i'm so exhausted.) i don't have anything more to say about this topic. maybe i'll retweet it with some more evidence in the future if we ever get more ADHDkasa content. for now, it would be all!
is tsukasa actually intentionally written as an ADHDer? Who Knows! there's a possibility that he is, but even if he's not, he's still one in my heart. regardless of the status of his possible neurodivergence, analyzing his behavior in this light was still very fun! and maybe i even converted someone into the ADHDkasa hell.
feel free to add something if you want to, and feel free to correct me if i got some things wrong! i still hope that even though of how messy this whole thing is written, i did tsukasa justice and didn't accidentally say too much nonsense lmao
...i hate ending analyses.
#i spent too much time on this. this is the most important thing i've ever written. if this flops i'm gonna do very bad things to myself.#/JOKE but seriously skdkshd if this does bad i'll be very sad#i'm way too passionate about this headcanon hehehehe#also don't mind the cover photo i just didn't want to put read more when it was still so empty#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#puroseka#prosekai#colorful stage#tsukasa tenma#tenma tsukasa#wonderlands x showtime#tsukasa wxs#wxs tsukasa#tsukasa pjsk#pjsk tsukasa#tsukasa project sekai#project sekai tsukasa#putting more tags on this one because i'm sorta proud of it#if i actually messed up something very bad you'll never hear from me again#ri says things the tag
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Me? Posting finished art? Ain't no way :O
No but @korruptbrekker reached out to me and asked if I was interested in doing a collab (go check out their piece here, I implore you), and you know I could not say no to such a wonderful artist asking lil ol me to do something fun like this. We ended up doing a swap @laugaheim and I came up with ages ago that I so sussinctly refer to as a moodboard-sketch-lineart-render swap. Rolls right off the tongue, right? Nah but it's exactly what it says. Make moodboards, swap and sketch from the other's, swap again and line the other's sketch, and then swap once again and finish the piece you sketched.
Very big thanks to Brekker for reaching out! This was so fun, I hope we can do something together again in the future!
#seriously this was so much fun#i forgot how much i love doing swaps like these#and i had a lot of fun rendering this#i was handed a really beachy and warm and cozy moodboard and you all know im down bad for some totes adorbs viktuuri#so i gave into all my impulses#also ALSO because im me the instax mini film phichit is holding (yes he has an instax mini because i said so) is the right scale and ratios#because i cant do anything halfway#and this illustration is made on a canvas that has the same dimensions as instax square film#and yes that is indeed a green carnation shirt yuuri is wearing why would you ever think i had it in me to not make him look like a gay dad#viktors just fabulous as ever because of course he is#when is he not#i need his outfit#if you ever wonder why viktor is wearing something in my art the answer is always that i personally want to own it#or because its fabulously queer but those two categories have a large amount of overlap#anyway thanks again to you brekker for this awesome project!#yuri on ice#yuri on ice fanart#fanart#art#arom antix art#arom antix#collab#katsuki yuuri#viktor nikiforov#viktuuri#phichit chulanont
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aroace experience of shipping characters in non-romantic ways .
they're each others world and would do anything for the other. they're constantly seen holding hands and cuddling, they share clothes, secrets, a bed.
and you ask them if they're dating, because to most people it would look like that. but no.
"they're my best friend."
and it stays like that, because that is all.
#ˑ ֗ ִ fire crackling ⊹ ࣪˖#aroaceposting#writing this thinking about emadauchi <3#not me projecting .#but seriously#there's so much flavor in qprs and non romantic shipping#i love being aro#aro#aromantic#ace#asexual#aroace#qpr
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I love how people are only ever interested in defending Arya's right to be weird-looking. It's never defending her intelligence from people who claim she's incapable of thinking for herself, highlighting her importance to the plot and refusing to see her as just a prop, acknowledging how much of her story gets stolen and given to other characters, talking about her trauma or how often it gets erased and overlooked, seeing her as more than just an attack dog/bodyguard, etc. Nope. It's just a "why can't people let Arya be ugly/unconventional looking? :(" post every other week because people are, for whatever reason, obsessed with how Arya is visually perceived. One of the most misinterpreted characters yet the issue is only ever with her being portrayed as "too pretty" or the wrong "type" of pretty. This fandom will entirely rewrite a character's motivations, values, and role in the story to the point that they consider references to canon "hate" but! The true injustice to canon is we acknowledge that she is described as pretty several times. Arya simply existing as her pretty, important, and non-conforming self is too complex and confusing for people to comprehend 😔.
#arya stark#asoiaf#fandom nonsense#how can Arya be considered pretty?! she's literally non-conforming?? being pretty belongs to /feminine/ female characters...right? 😱#I feel like these people tell on themselves with how much they value beauty because they make it /such/ a big deal#when her self-esteem issues regarding being a lady are infinitely more relevant to her story (and more interesting to discuss)#her being mocked for having the Stark look is a supporting story element that also reinforces her being an outcast considering#her mother + all of her trueborn siblings have a southern look and she was raised with southern standards#not to mention her non-conformity and often messy appearance heavily impacted how her looks were perceived#George writes Arya's non-conformity as parallel to traditional femininity so it makes sense that beauty is one of those aspects he subverts#(also why it makes sense that her future includes accepting her identity as a Lady while redefining the role but that's off topic)#this is why you need to look at the writing instead of judging based on the /type/ of character you think Arya is#and! it's truly not that serious 😭 I'm sure it will be a plot point eventually but it's not 98% of her story like these people pretend#Arya is such an interesting + well-written character but we constantly get people rewriting her and nonsense discourse around her looks#such rich material and all you can say is that she's an /odd-looking feral gremlin/ and I'm supposed to take your opinion seriously#at this point the obsession with Arya being /weird/ looking has to be some projection of personal self-esteem issues#there's no way /this/ is the hill you're willing to die on with all the terrible takes about Arya from this fandom#wish people who didn't care about her would just stop bringing her up so we could have our discussions about her in peace
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Hey do you think there's a deeper meaning or reason Spite looks just like Lucanis...
There's the scene by the fireplace and I picked up on how Lucanis closes his eyes as he turns his head to avoid looking at Spite...
It's like looking in a mirror, right, and your reflection is staring back as you deliberately hurt yourself with your words.
Lucanis, I think, is stuck in a cycle of 'It’s all I know.' 'It's what I'm good at.' But there's cracks there that hint this isn't who he wants to be...
"Death is my calling."
I don't think he actually believes that, but he has to tell himself that, right?
I don't think he's ever been given the chance to explore who he wants to be, he's just been told this is who he is...
Demons are bound when you 'tell' them what they are so loudly that it's all they can hear. They have to be what you want." But a spirit who evolves to become more of a "real person" is less malleable than a spirit and if they have the certainty of who they are and who they desire to be, they can resist binding entirely.
Did someone else bind the spirit to him by force? Corrupt its nature so fit the needs of the user?
If Spite was originally Love (as I've seen some people comment Love being the opposite of Spite) and they were forcibly bound to Lucanis for whatever reason, did that cause Love to twist into Spite?
I think we're going to have to heal both Lucanis and Spite from whatever grief or trauma they've been through, make him come to terms and accept whatever fucked up thing happened, so it sticks, and he stops just "wiping the slate clean".
He comes across to me as a guy who's just like going through the motions, and needs more of a push to change, for himself.
Nevertheless, it is not unheard of for spirits to evolve and become more "human" by coming to terms with grief, heal from being emotionally hurt, and thus be able to learn from what they endured. By coming to terms with grief, a spirit is able to grow as a person and not "wash clean" like a spirit."
Then I was reading up on spirit healers, and again, there's that same theme of trust here, the spirit trusting the 'mage' and also the loss of trust when being tricked by a benevolent spirit...
To gain the services of such benevolent and righteous beings requires that the mage earn their trust. Often this requires a series of trials to prove that the mage's goals are as noble as the spirit demands, though some mages have claimed to command the compliance of such spirits through sheer force of charisma.
So if Spite was Love, imagine if the trust was broken from the get-go, by whoever brought them over from the fade, that surely would cause Love to twist into Spite?
More than one tale exists of a spirit healer being fooled by a demon masquerading as a benevolent spirit, and inadvertently bringing them across the Veil... or being tricked into letting down their guard, and possessed.
On the flip side, Lucanis is not a mage(?) but if he needed help or something idk- and he was tricked and possessed that way - tricked by 'Love'? Owch, the loss of trust there...
Oh and if Spite just a spirit of Love that was corrupted by Lucanis' own feelings? Like how Justice twisted into Vengeance(?)
We know Lucanis is relearning how to trust, and he's a romantic.
How can you trust others If you don't trust yourself? Spite feels like intrusive thoughts made manifest... And how can you Love others if you have no Love left for yourself? Spite seems to be chipping away at Lucanis slowly... he looks so tired.
What exactly happened to him, I wonder, I can't wait to find out cause it's gonna hurt...
#please dont take this too seriously i dont know half of what I'm talking about I just wanted to wite some thoughts down#i have only read the wigmakers job once and lucanis wiki page#so i dont really know much of the intricacies of his story or what we have been given so far as i dont want to spoil myself#but i did think after reading the wigmakers job that yeah someones put that dog in him#lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#datv#please don’t spoil anything for me in the tags or replies LOL#im just rambling a little#<3#I see bits of myself in Lucanis I think thats why I got brain worms#but we usually project onto characters dont we? we all just want to be known#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard
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I love when characters are more than just victims. I love Kevin Day having bitch princess behaviour. So many people, ESPECIALLY authors forget that you are more than just a victim. They write you as scared animal who seems to escape any situation possible. I'd really rather people see Kevin Day as a whiny asshole than just a survivor. Because that already means you are more than aftermath of your abuser. That means there's some part of your life that's not connected to him. And that is surprisingly low bar that so many people just refuse to step up to
#im just projecting myself onto Kevin Day brb#but seriously can we talk about that#it sucks so much when youre nothing more than something that was once your abuser's#you cant move on like that#aftg#all for the game#the sunshine court#tsc#kevin day
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finally posting the full soleil/nina piece i did for @fesapphiczine ⚔️🏹 i guess yuri won the yaoi/yuri war in the end 🫶💘
#always super honored to represent fates. and it's that much better when i get to draw queer content#seriously i will never shut up about how much i love projecting queerness onto the cast of fates even if yadda yadda bad writing#i love this game so much#soleil#nina#eponine#soleil fire emblem#nina fire emblem#fire emblem fates#fe if#fire emblem if#fates#fe fates#fe14#fe 14#hypsclera
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