#But in reality you just don't want to look bad
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Looking at the world from a manager's perspective, you can productively model the pool of workers as being divided into a few basic groups, which are defined and characterized by their driving motivations.
Insert all the usual disclaimers for this sort of thing - this is the roughest type of rough typology. I pulled these categories out of my raw intuition, and possibly a few more would crop up with some additional thought. In reality, the boundaries of these categories are incredibly fuzzy, and almost every individual is actually going to be motivated by a complicated mix of all the relevant motivations; we're talking REALLY SIMPLE HEURISTICS here. Etc.
There have been other well-known worker typologies that share a lot in common with my thoughts here; this is mostly not novel, it's mostly meant to refine a few ideas for particular purposes.
Hustlers are motivated by concrete personal advantage. Most commonly, and most straightforwardly, they want money - as much of it as they can get. They may also be interested in fame, idiosyncratic perks, etc. They do whatever they have to do in order to get what they want.
No surprise: you see huge preponderances of these guys in fields that provide outsize concrete rewards, e.g. finance, the upper echelons of management, etc. But not every natural-born Hustler is in a position to enter a glitzy high-paying field, and in fact you find Hustlers all throughout society and all throughout the economy, finding or making hustles wherever they go.
Having Hustlers working for you is mostly pretty great. They get shit done. They can be induced to work incredibly hard - probably harder than anyone else, under most circumstances - and they'll shank their own mothers if the price is right. If you need anything really important from them, anything at all, it's just a matter of bribing them enough.
...they will also, of course, cheerfully shank you if the price is right. Hustlers aren't the only wellsprings of institutional politics and infighting, but they're the most dangerous ones; they're always potential rivals to everyone around them. Also, you need to keep the tangible rewards flowing in a steady stream in order to get anything out of them, or else they'll put most of their effort into jumping ship (one way or another).
Craftsmen are motivated by the desire to do good work in their chosen fields, for its own sake and for the sake of their treasured self-image as people who do good work.
As you'd expect, for the most part, they're excellent workers and should be prized. But they're not perfect workers. Common weaknesses and downsides include:
They tend to have their own ideas about How Things Should Get Done; they're often resistant to externally-imposed product/service requirements or process changes (and bad at implementing those things) (no matter how important or well-conceived they are), and they're very resistant to "just get it out the door, right now done is better than good."
Being driven chiefly by internal motivation is great, but sometimes it's useful to be able to push things along with external motivators, and Craftsmen are pretty resistant to those. They don't like working more or harder than they're naturally inclined to work, they mostly sneer at carrots, and sticks make them sad and unproductive.
It's important to note that, while noteworthy skill within a field correlates with having a Craftsman temperament and motivation suite - for obvious reasons - those things are not identical at all. Plenty of Craftsmen are bad at their jobs, or just average, and plenty of the best workers are most motivated by things other than the Excellence of the Work Itself.
Fanatics are a relatively rare and specialized group, whom you find mostly within a few specific sorts of culturally-valorized fields. They're motivated by a desire to be part of something Important and Good in a Broader Sense: to Save the World, or some smaller-bore version of that.
They make amazing front-line soldiers, in the sorts of institutions that have "front-line soldiers." They work super hard, and you don't even need to bribe them, you just need to keep them hopped up on inspiration.
The big problem with them is that they're mostly motivated by a feeling - the feeling of Being Righteous - and it's not easy to control where they get that feeling, in any kind of precise way. They're just as resistant to external motivators as Craftsmen are, or even more so, but they're also not being guided by an ideal of effective quality. (No, not even if their chosen cause is theoretically all about an ideal of effective quality, hem hem.) They will happily waste vast amounts of time and money doing useless things, or even counterproductive things, so long as they're engaged in tasks that hit the right psychological buttons for them. There's also a constant risk that a Fanatic will decide that his employer is unrighteous, or that one of his coworkers is unrighteous, and start an internal conflict; the risk scales in a more-than-linear fashion with the number of Fanatics you keep around.
The biggest group, unsurprisingly, is the Normies. In most fields, it is much the biggest group. Normies are motivated by the desire to be members in good standing of their communities, to have positive relationships with the people around them, and to live up to basic norms and expectations.
Managerial skills, in the traditional sense, are incredibly important with Normies. If you want them to do good work for you - and you should want that, as a manager, you've almost certainly got a whole bunch of them - not only do you have to keep them pointed in the right direction, you have to make sure that they're supporting each other. With Hustlers, you just have to throw money at them (and avoid their power plays); with Craftsmen, you just have to let them do their thing, and occasionally badger them into giving you what you need; with Fanatics, you just have to be inspirational; but with Normies, you have to lead, and construct a productive community. You have to set reasonable, achievable norms and expectations that will get you what you need.
This wouldn't be complete if I didn't talk about the Defectors. The Defectors are motivated by not working. They don't want to be there, they resent having to do their jobs, and their primary goal is to shirk as much as possible. They will, by default, put much more effort into shirking than into their assigned tasks.
Obviously, managers don't want to have to deal with them, for good reason. But they're out there, in large numbers - not always in the places and fields where you'd expect to find them - and learning to manage them is sometimes more viable than trying to get rid of them. ("Moving Heaven and Earth to find them jobs that will change their attitude" is often a good plan, although of course it's not always possible and not always worth it.)
Crucially, Defectors are not Normies. If you start with the assumption that the average baseline worker is lazy and sour, you will make some incredibly stupid decisions. There are some fields where, for structural reasons, you can expect that a very large number of your workers will be Defectors; this is a huge and complicated challenge, well beyond the scope of this post, and good luck to you if you have to handle it, but it's not the default.
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Once you have those categories in your head, and can play with them, a number of obvious-seeming ideas present themselves. Just a couple, for now:
Most high-level executives are Hustlers, or have strong Hustler tendencies, for obvious reasons. Most of the people around them are Hustlers, or have strong Hustler tendencies. This means that they tend to overweight the Hustler outlook, by a lot, when they try to model what their workers are like. More specifically, I'd wager that a lot of them intuitively divide the world into "good workers" ( = Hustlers) and "bad workers" ( = Defectors). This will lead to a heavy overreliance on tangible rewards, a systematic shortchanging of community-building, etc. Which is in fact just what we see.
In particular - crucially - Hustlers and Defectors are the only worker types who ever become more productive under heavy stress. Hustlers actually benefit from it, because it raises the stakes of the game that they're already playing. (If you succeed, you'll be king of the world! If you fail, you'll be shark food! Go go go!) Defectors suffer terribly from stress, of course, but they can sometimes be spooked into doing their jobs as opposed to doing nothing, and sometimes that's the best/easiest way to get something out of them. But stress is terrible for everyone else. Craftsmen lose their focus. Fanatics lose their hope. It's worst of all for Normies, because they take all their cues from the vibes around them; they're productive when they learn to associate work with comfort and happiness, and when you fill their working world with frantic desperation, you just put them in a permanent cringe state.
stop trying to pit your Normies against each other in competitions for status and rewards dear God what are you stupid
To some extent, you can control your institution by controlling what types of workers you have. But only to some extent. There are only so many Hustlers and Craftsmen to go around, and if you want them, you will have to (a) be able to identify them reliably on little information [HINT: you are probably very bad at this], and (b) provide them with what they want [tangible rewards / comfortable security and interesting work]. "We are going to employ only the good special people" is feasible if you're an outfit of four workers; at a dozen, it's already become a stretch; at a few hundred, uh, pfffffffft. If you want to operate at scale, you need to be able to make Normies do good work, there is no substitute for it.
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GMMTV 2025 Line Up - My Totally Biased and Wildly Flawed Feels
This is the point where I remind you that GMMTV announced 16 BLs for 2024 and didn't actually release 4 of them in 2024: My Golden Blood, Ossan‘s Love, Sweet Tooth Good Dentist, and The Ex-Morning.
So despite the fact that these are from GMMTV 2025 line up, some of them will not happen until 2026, and some could get dropped entirely or have cast changes.
I'm not including the GLs, grab bags, or possible bromances. Confirmed full-tilt gay af only.
In order of ones I'm most excited about.
Dare You to Death
trailer
JoongDunk as police investigators in a mystery suspense thriller. Yes, I'm in. This is it. This it the one I wanted to instantly watch. Even though their's 20 BLs airing right now.
This is the only trailer I immediately rewatched.
Boys in Love
trailer
Our only true high school BL from GMMTV and it's fresh faces for the youths and old favs for the teachers. It's milk teeth Make it Right and that is perfectly fine with me! I like lotte milk. Also DIMPLES! Yay! I suspect they're using this one to test some new pairs for future seasons. Like a Project 101 Thai BL. (Honestly I just invented an amazing reality TV for you GMMTV, you're welcome.)
Like My School President was in 2023, this could be a major 2025 sleeper hit for me.
Memoir of Rati
trailer
Sing the praise song with me BLabies! GreatInn in a HISTORICAL with a class divide and everyone's favourite side couple! Be still my heart! I'm beyond pleased. (Also I got my boat in a lotus pond at last.) My only concern is this could end sad, it's in the title after all.
This is the only trailer that gave me chills.
My Magic Prophecy
trailer
Paranormal mystery with a fortune teller and a doctor. I'm in. I hope the script doesn't fail JimmySea again, they are such a great pair. I'm intrigued by this one but it felt the most formless of all the trailers, so I'm thinking we could see some significant tweaks.
Me and Thee
trailer
A photographer gets involved with the mafia? OMG is this a Thai dupe for Target the Finder? Only mixed with Cyrano? WILD. I mean to say, this one is wild WILD! Plus Est (my love) back in suits and ear dongles I see. Also GMMTV never gonna let us forget they bagged two of BL's best bods with PP, thanks all for the visuals.
Of course this is for me. I'm the shallowest, remember? Plus I love a BL that's just a little bit...... well...... stupid.
A Dog and A Plane
trailer
A prissy gay flight attendant in a push-pull relationship with an EMT dude-bro. Characters are a bit throwback to PeteKao (no bad thing) not to mention the looming shadow of What the Duck? (bad thing). But the side couple is the always appealing MarcPoon.
Okay GMMTV, surprise me, I'm game. And you know TayNew are my OG GMMTV pair du jour.
Cat for Cash
trailer
Finally something fluffy with a pair I like. Looks cute. I like cute. Yay for me! Adorable gay boys and cats.
This one is basically made to be a tumblr comfort meme meets thirst trap. I see what you're doing GMMTV and I applaud you. Carry on.
That Summer
trailer
The only side pair to seriously level up. Okay so amnesia is my least favourite trope, and I tend to not be wild about secret identity either, but I like both pairs in this one, so I'll watch.
My Romance Scammer
trailer
New couple! My boys Ohm and Fluke (no, not that Fluke, the one from My Ride). Honestly, Fluke has popped up as a side in a couple GMMTV shows I was wondering who they'd BL him with.
This could win. Prettiest human on earth paired with the world's most potent single dimple. Will I survive? I honestly don't know, because Ohm historically doesn't have much chemistry with anyone but the original Fluke so... Still I l do love JuniorMark and this as a really unique premise (gay Heartbreakers), so I'm game.
Head 2 Head
trailer
The Boo kids are back. I don't love this pair (I find their chemistry and acting awkward) or the main trope (E2L) but I do like the new sides and their trope (2nd chance is a fav of mine). So this one will depend on whether those are full side dishes or just crumbs.
Ticket To Heaven
trailer
GMMTV is doing Boy Foretold by Stars concept? Interesting, did not have religious boundary pushing and bildungsroman down on he Thai BL bingo card.
This isn't my thing but I think G4 are actually going to be amazing in it and I certainly look forward to them pushing their acting chops. Not to mention the discomfort something like this can cause in general/global viewership. I like it when BL makes people (who aren't me) uncomfortable.
Burnout Syndrome
trailer
GMMTV doing edgy is never a good thing IMHO, and in this one they're handling sex work. *shakes head* However, Not Me is the noted exception and this is that same pair with the same director. So I'm curious if not wild about the content.
That said, I'm delighted to see Gun with someone else (Dew is a stunning choice, thank you Casting) even if only for a love triangle moment. It's been a WHILE.
Melody of Secrets
trailer
Not wild about ForceBook, do like a mystery, don't like horror or psychological thrillers... not sure on this one.
I like BL pushing into new territory, even if it's not my territory, but this is defiantly not made for me, that's for damn sure.
And that's the end of my list.
"But wait," you cry. "P'ABL you're still missing some."
How Dare
Only Friends Dream On
trailer
Yeah, no fuckoff. I will not be watching this. I already marked it pink on the Spreadsheet of Doom. (Pink means CNF or an automatic no watch for me.)
But dude was it nice to see all those pairs busted. That's always a good time for me. Anyway, all you so-n-sos who gave the first one your eyeballs are to blame for this. Watch it n weep. Without me.
(Side note: I love it when a title reviews itself, Only Friends: Dream On, indeed. It's like media aptronym.)
and last and definately least......
Love You Teacher
trailer
no
no no
NO NO
NO!!!
I do like Perth & Santa (although I'm not sold on them as a pair). But words cannot describe how much I dislike this premise. SERIOUSLY? No thank you very much. I could, just maybe, hate watch Only Friends 2, but it's gonna be hard for me to even turn this on. Infantilization and people acting like children wigs me tf out. YKINMKBYKIOK of course, but not in my BL GMMTV. Stop it! (This one also got the dreaded pink of will not watch.)
More Disappointments
Thor didn't get the lead in anything. (Pouts in "but he so sexy.")
No major pairs were significantly busted.
Tonally it's gone darker than I expected. I prefer lighter fluffier BL so this tonal shift for GMMTV as a whole is not a win for me personally. Should be left to Japan IMHO.
That said, most of my favorite GMMTV pairs are in my top picks to watch as well, so I'm happy for that.
I'm Intrigued Despite Myself
My favorite trailer of all was actually Wu (red thread fated paranormals are my favoritest thing ever next to isekai) but that's not a branded pair so I'm not convinced it's BL. Hoping it is, but that happened in 2024 with these boys, so I'll leave it in the air for now.
I like that we're making push to leave uni and high school behind (don't worry, other Thai studios will fill the gap). I think GMMTV is doing this in order to
keep branded pairs together and
keep the actors of those pairs interested in the BL scripts.
As their major pairs age out of uni, GMMTV has to hand them more meaty and grown up stuff. I didn't think they would actually do this, so I'm pleased to see it happen. Even if it's all going darker than I like, at least it's different.
I don't really report on GL and I rarely have time to watch it these days. I thought the new MilkLove looked cute, but I'm still recovering from whatever happen in their last one. The Girl's Rules one looks like a light-weight L-Word. Still happy to see GMMTV move out of school for thier few GLs too.
(source)
#gmmtv#bl 2025 line up#gmmtv 2025#new bl#thai bl#forthcoming bl#Dare You to Death#JongDunk#Boys in Love#Memoir of Rati#GreatInn#My Magic Prophecy#JimmySea#Me and Thee#PondPhuwin#A Dog and A Plane#TayNew#Cat for Cash#FirstKhao#That Summer#WinnySatang#Head 2 Head#SeaKeen#Ticket To Heaven#geminifourth#Burnout Syndrome#OffGun#Melody of Secrets#ForceBook#Only Friends Dream On
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Pardonnez-moi, Monsieur!- Solivan brugmansia x Yan!G.N Reader! (Part 5!) {1st part)
The kid at the back is a 18+ visual novel Minors don't interact!
Words:10000
Genre: Yandere-(Self aware yandere won the poll)
(Reader is G.N)
Summary: You’ve become consumed by your obsession with Solivan Brugmansia. What started as innocent curiosity quickly spiraled into a fixation. He started it and you began to stalk him, learning every detail about his life. You felt a sick sense of satisfaction in making Sol’s world safer while growing increasingly delusional about your connection with him. Your love for him deepens as you fantasize about the future, convinced that you are the one who truly understands him—better than anyone else. Despite the line between reality and obsession blurring, you remain certain: Sol is yours, even if he doesn’t know it yet.. You're his and he's yours...
Trigger Warning: This content contains themes of obsessive behavior, stalking, manipulation, mental instability, and delusional thinking, Drugging, Yandere?, Hopeless in love for attention Please read with caution.
This part will contain the Arcade Scene in Sol's Route so...Proceed with caution.
Mentions of Pet-names, Blood, (Implied ATTEMPTED S/A),
Obsessive behavior: The reader becomes dangerously fixated on someone, bordering on stalking and delusion.
Manipulation: The reader engages in schemes to control or harm others, often through deception.
Mental illness: Delusional thinking, possible dissociation from reality, and unhealthy fixation on someone.
Violence: There are references to bullying, physical harm, and emotional manipulation.
Emotional abuse: Both in terms of how the protagonist manipulates others and how they might internalize toxic behaviors.
Stalking: The reader watches and follows the person they are obsessed with.
EXTRA: He's a character from a game named The kid at the back!! Note, The relationship presented here between sol and reader is extremely toxic!! In no way, Just because I'm writing doesn't mean I support this kind of toxicity. Note, It's okay to like sol if you know the flaws and don't be a blind eye on them! Again, I don't support his actions etc! If you hate sol ignore this.
The school bell echoed through the hallway, signaling the start of the next class. Hyugo groaned loudly, stretching his arms dramatically.
"I don't want to go to class. I hate my History teacher almost as much as I hate my archery coach."
You raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at your lips. "Weird. Doesn’t George of the Jungle like archery?" you quipped without thinking.
Hyugo froze, his baby-blue eyes narrowing slightly as his pout deepened. "Well, that’s his thing! It’s not like he shares everything with his big brother, you know. But I’m the star now, Y/n." His tone was defensive, but the look on his face said something else entirely: How the hell do you know so much about us?
You didn’t respond to his unspoken question, simply smiling to yourself. Keeping tabs on the secrets of the brothers had its perks, even if you were cautious not to push any boundaries. They weren’t people you wanted to turn against you. Dangerous as they were, having those secrets up your sleeve felt oddly empowering. And with Sol on your side, you weren’t too worried about the fallout. Hyugo clearly adored Sol, and Sol? Well, he wasn’t letting anyone mess with you.
It was to make sure, Geo won't diss your ass.
"Why don’t you just skip class then?" Sol suggested, almost too casually.
Hyugo’s entire face lit up, his eyes practically sparkling. It was as if a literal lightbulb had turned on above his head.
Both you and Sol immediately recognized that look.
“Don’t tell me—” Sol started, but Hyugo cut him off with a dramatic wave of his hand.
"I am skipping class! That’s it. Fuck this school!" he declared triumphantly. "If they’re going to treat us like crap, we might as well be the bad guys. Right, Y/n?"
You sighed heavily, already seeing where this was headed. Sol mirrored your reaction, exhaling loudly with a look of resigned annoyance.
Hyugo leaned closer, his grin widening mischievously. He was practically glowing with chaotic energy as he nudged you. “Come on, Y/n. Don’t tell me you’ve never skipped class before. It’s a beautiful day to break a few rules.”
Skipping class? As if you’d never done it before. Honestly, you’d lost count of the times you’d avoided lectures just to stalk observe Solivan Brugmansia. And now? The man himself and his overly enthusiastic counterpart were inviting you to join them. The temptation was palpable.
It wasn’t just tempting—it was irresistible.
Hyugo turned up the charm, grinning at you like the devil himself.
His expression screamed to you. But you know he doesn't know.
C’mon, Y/n. Look at this—your dream guy, Solivan Brugmansia, right here. All we’re missing is you. Come to the dark side—we’ve got rooftop vibes.
Your lips twitched. "Stop reading my mind," you muttered under your breath.
Skipping class actually sounded pretty good. The teacher was dull, Crowe would be there—ugh, not worth the effort. You glanced at Sol, who stood quietly, waiting for your decision. His expression said he’d go along with whatever you chose, but there was a certain edge of don’t make me regret this.
Hyugo’s voice interrupted your thoughts again. "So? What’s it gonna be? Stay here and suffer? Or join us in sweet rebellion?" He leaned in closer, his grin practically daring you.
“Fuck it. We skip!” you said with finality, throwing caution to the wind.
Hyugo cheered, throwing his arms into the air like he’d just won a championship. “That’s the spirit!”
Even Sol couldn’t hide the faint smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. He sighed again but nodded, his hand brushing against yours briefly as he turned to follow Hyugo toward the stairs.
Well, you were already falling. Might as well enjoy the descent.
"But how the hell do we even pull this off? Obviously, we can’t go through the entrance. The vents are blocked, and—"
Sol’s lips curled into a small smile, one so rare and heart-stopping that your brain short-circuited on the spot.
"I know a way," he said calmly.
Wah! Huh?! Ehh?! Your heart was practically exploding as your face turned a deep, humiliating shade of red. You could barely think straight. Sol didn’t even seem to notice your flustered state as he turned and began leading the way.
Hyugo, oblivious as ever, dashed ahead, his energy as wild as ever. If either of them caught a glimpse of your lovesick expression, you’d never live it down.
The path Sol chose led to the back of the school, near the edge of the gardens. Towering iron fences barricaded the perimeter, but Sol confidently navigated through the greenery until he stopped in front of a large bush. He crouched and pushed it aside, revealing a decently sized hole in the fence.
Your jaw dropped. "Wait. Did you… make this? Sol?"
Before he could answer, Hyugo interjected with a proud grin. "He didn’t."
Sol cast Hyugo a sharp look. "He did."
Hyugo’s grin only widened. "I did," he admitted smugly before dropping down and crawling through the gap without hesitation.
Sol gestured for you to go next, his golden-crimson eyes scanning the area to make sure no one was watching. "Go on," he urged softly.
Why is he so sweet?! you thought, practically combusting on the spot. Trying not to overthink his protectiveness, you crouched and squeezed through the gap in the fence.
Leaves and twigs clung to your uniform as you emerged on the other side, brushing them off as Sol followed behind. The three of you maneuvered past bushes and shrubs, the crisp crunch of fallen leaves underfoot marking your escape. Finally, you reached the pavement on the other side of the grounds.
Sol stepped forward and held out a hand to help you up from where you crouched. You took it, your heart doing backflips at the gentle way he pulled you to your feet.
"So, what’s the plan?" you asked, glancing at Hyugo, who was already fumbling with his phone.
Hyugo’s eyes suddenly widened as he stared at the screen. His fingers flew across the screen in panic before he let out an overdramatic gasp and grabbed Sol’s shoulder in a vice-like grip.
"SHERLOCK HOLMES IS OUT?!" he practically screamed.
Sol winced, rubbing his ear. "My ears, Hyugo."
"The movie’s out?" you asked, raising a brow. Then, with a teasing smile, you added, "Did you set the date wrong again, Hyugo?"
"How could I?!" Hyugo shouted indignantly before bolting off at full speed, leaving you and Sol behind.
Sol pinched the bridge of his nose, his irritation bubbling just under the surface. "For the love of—" he muttered, hands on his hips. With a heavy sigh, he began walking after Hyugo.
You trailed alongside him, sneaking glances at his exasperated expression. Sol looked utterly defeated, like a parent chasing after their wayward child. It was hard not to laugh.
"Why are you smiling?" Sol asked, casting you a suspicious look.
You shrugged innocently, biting your lip to keep from laughing. "No reason."
He rolled his eyes but didn’t press further, the corners of his lips twitching upward despite himself.
Hyugo kept tapping furiously on his phone, but as his shoulders slumped, you realized it—he got the date wrong.
Shoving his phone back into his pocket, he turned to you and Sol with a dramatic sigh. Then, clasping his hands together, he pulled out the biggest pair of puppy-dog eyes you’d ever seen.
"We have got to watch it! Can we, Y/n? Can we, Sunny?" he pleaded, his voice bordering on a whine.
"I’ll pass," Sol replied, crossing his arms. "You can go enjoy the movie. I’m planning to hit the arcade while you’re at it."
Hyugo’s pout deepened, the sparkle in his baby-blue eyes dimming into a pitiful half-lidded stare. "Aw, come on. Don’t you like crime movies, Sol? Isn’t Sherlock right up your alley?"
You bit your tongue, realizing too late what you’d just said. That tidbit of information? You’d learned it from stalking Sol. The way his eyes flicked toward you with a mix of surprise and suspicion told you he’d noticed.
"Y/n’s right!" Hyugo exclaimed, unknowingly coming to your rescue. "You’re always watching those crime videos, so come on, it’s perfect! Let’s go see it!"
But Sol’s face was set, his disinterest plain as day. "I’m not in the mood for a movie right now," he said simply.
Hyugo groaned before turning his attention to you, desperation flashing in his eyes. "How about you, Y/n? Would you like to watch it with me? The ticket and food are on me, of course!"
You hesitated, glancing at Sol. His gaze was unwavering, almost expectant.
"I’ll stick with Sol," you said finally. "The arcade sounds like fun."
Hyugo raised an eyebrow before shrugging, his pout quickly replaced with a mischievous grin. "Alright, go on your little impromptu date, then! I don’t want to third-wheel anyway."
"Date!?" you sputtered, your face immediately heating up.
Sol rolled his eyes, looking unfazed. "You’re the one who decided we should skip class and do whatever we wanted," he said with a shrug.
"Yeah, yeah, I get it!" Hyugo waved dismissively. "I’m off to the theater, then. Don’t let me stop you two lovebirds!" He stuck out his tongue playfully before turning to leave, his laughter echoing as he jogged away.
Sol let out a long sigh, shaking his head. "He’s impossible," he muttered.
Meanwhile, you stood frozen, your cheeks burning. Date…?
Sol turned to you, ready to move on, but his gaze caught you fiddling nervously with your hair, fingers twisting the strands like they held some hidden secret. Your lips moved in barely audible whispers, your voice trembling.
"D-Date…? D-Date?! DATE?!?!"
Your face had turned such a deep crimson that Sol immediately furrowed his brows, stepping closer. "Are you okay?" he asked, his voice tinged with genuine concern. Before you could react, his cool hand pressed against your burning forehead.
The sudden touch sent a jolt through your entire body, your nerves firing like a storm. You screeched, a mix of surprise and overwhelming emotion, and nearly stumbled backward.
"Y/n!" Sol exclaimed, his other hand darting out to steady you, but you quickly waved him off.
"I-I'm fine!" you stammered, your voice shaky. Your heart was pounding so loud you were sure he could hear it. The thought made you panic even more. You reached out, gripping his arm with both hands as if tethering yourself to reality, and pulled him closer.
"Let’s just get going!" you blurted, tugging on his arm as you started walking. Sol stumbled slightly but followed, his face tinged pink now. He didn’t say anything, and neither did you.
But inside, oh, inside was a very different story.
Your grip on his arm was firm, almost possessive. You could feel the fabric of his sleeve under your fingers, could feel the warmth of his skin beneath it. It was grounding, intoxicating even. His scent—a faint mix of lavender and something uniquely Sol—wrapped around you like a blanket.
Your mind churned with chaotic thoughts, obsessive and dark but cloaked in a sugary sweetness that made them feel almost...innocent.
He’s mine. No one else can touch him like this. No one else can make him blush like I can. Hyugo can call it a date all he wants—it’s not just that. It’s more. So much more. He’s perfect, isn’t he? Perfect and mine.
Your grip tightened slightly as you walked, but Sol didn’t seem to notice.
But what if someone tries to take him away?
The thought slithered in unbidden, souring your moment of happiness. You glanced at Sol from the corner of your eye. His calm, handsome face made your heart swell again, but the fear lingered.
You tugged him closer as you walked, your pace slightly faster now, as if putting distance between him and anyone who might come too close. Sol gave you a curious glance but didn’t pull away. If anything, he seemed content with the silence, his steps steady beside yours.
He didn’t know. He didn’t notice the way your thoughts spiraled, the way your mind painted scenarios of keeping him close, of ensuring no one ever got between you two.
No one ever would.
The bright neon lights of the arcade's exterior came into view, their vibrant hues reflecting off the wet pavement from an earlier drizzle. You paused for a moment to admire the sight, turning to Sol with a curious tilt of your head.
“Is this place new?” you asked, your tone a mix of wonder and excitement.
Sol, standing casually beside you, shook his head. “No,” he replied, his voice carrying a hint of his usual calm exasperation. “It’s hidden in the city. Hard to notice unless you know what you’re looking for.”
You raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “And how do you know about places like this?”
Sol sighed, his annoyance barely masked. “Because Hyugo drags me to places like this all the time,” he muttered, his tone dry.
You couldn’t help but giggle at his expression, earning a small shrug from him. Without another word, he reached into his pocket and handed you a few tokens.
“So, which game are we starting with?” he asked, his crimson-and-orange eyes glinting faintly under the arcade’s colorful lights.
Your heart skipped at how effortlessly he seemed prepared. “Wow, you were ready for this, huh?”
Sol smirked slightly, his voice soft but teasing. “As always.”
Then, without thinking, he held out his hand toward you, not for the tokens, but for you to take. Your breath hitched, your heart thundering in your chest. Hesitating only for a moment, you placed your hand in his, feeling the warmth of his palm against yours.
Together, you stepped into the arcade, the cacophony of beeping machines, upbeat music, and excited chatter enveloping you both.
The two of you roamed the arcade, hopping from game to game. Sol was surprisingly skilled—his reflexes sharp, his focus unshakable—but you knew, you just knew, he was letting you win most of the time.
When you pointed it out, pouting, “It’s not fair—you keep letting me win,” Sol’s lips quirked into a faint smile.
“Maybe you’re just that good,” he said smoothly, his tone making your cheeks flush.
You playfully rolled your eyes. “You’re such a flatterer.”
But then, in the next few rounds, something shifted. Both of you started losing games—repeatedly. It didn’t take long to figure out why. Sol was purposefully holding back, trying to make sure you won, and you, in turn, were doing the exact same for him.
Neither of you said a word about it.
Instead, you both exchanged bashful glances, silently acknowledging the unspoken game within the game. The warmth spreading in your chest was undeniable.
Eventually, you found yourself at a claw machine, fishing out the last of your tokens to insert into the slot. The machine beeped in denial, signaling you were out.
“Hold on,” Sol said, already turning toward the token exchange counter. “I’ll grab some more.”
Before he left, he pressed the remainder of his tokens into your hand. “Use these in the meantime,” he said softly.
Your fingers closed around the tokens, and as he walked away, you couldn’t help but stare after him, your heart full. He’s so... thoughtful, you mused, biting back a smile.
You moved through the rows of arcade machines, the excitement of the games buzzing around you. Your eyes scanned each one, but then something caught your attention—a claw machine, with a plushie horse sitting inside. A smile tugged at the corner of your lips as you remembered Hyugo mentioning that Sol liked plushies, particularly ones shaped like horses. Perfect, you thought to yourself. This could be the perfect surprise for him.
You made your way to the claw machine, carefully inserting a token and adjusting the joystick with precision. Your eyes locked onto the horse plushie, and you steered the claw expertly, watching it descend and grab onto the toy. Your heart skipped a beat as the claw began to lift, bringing the horse towards the chute. Almost there…
But then—SMACK!
A sharp sound echoed in your ear as someone suddenly slapped your ass. You whipped around, fury bubbling up inside you as you glared at the man who reeked of alcohol, his breath sour and sloppy. The two men flanking him were equally obnoxious, their laughter cutting through the air.
"Hey, beautiful," the man slurred, his grin crooked and nasty. "You’re looking a bit lost. Let me show you how to play the game."
The words made your blood boil. You couldn’t stand these assholes, thinking they could just take what they wanted. Without hesitation, you spun around, your foot swinging up sharply and connecting with the man’s crotch.
"Ahh!" He groaned, doubling over in pain.
Without another word, you bolted, your heart pounding as adrenaline surged through your body. You dashed through the arcade, glancing back to see the drunken fools stumbling after you. The guy who'd slapped you shouted, his voice slurring but still full of aggression, "Don’t let them get away!"
The chase was on, but you weren't about to let them catch you. You rounded a corner, slipping through a gap between machines, and immediately dove into the crowd of people. You kept your head down, weaving through the arcade, trying to lose them in the maze of flashing lights and clinking tokens.
The sound of their footsteps was close behind, but you managed to stay one step ahead, your mind focused and determined. You didn’t know what they would do if they caught up to you, but you sure as hell weren’t going to find out..
You ran desperately, your heart hammering in your chest as you darted through the arcade, weaving through machines and crowds, but the clattering noise of the games drowned out your calls for help. The panic rose in your throat. Where the hell is Sol?
You kept running, your mind racing for a solution. Your fingers brushed the glass shards scattered near a broken machine, and your heart quickened with an idea. You grabbed one of the shards, feeling the sharp edge in your grip as you ran towards the restroom. Your legs burned, but you didn’t dare slow down. You had to get away from those bastards.
Slamming the door behind you, you locked it as best as you could. But just as you pulled out your phone, your fingers trembling, you cursed—no signal. The frustration and fear made your heart sink, and your anger boiled over. Shit, shit, shit...
You leaned against the wall, trying to steady your breath, but then the unmistakable sound of banging hit the door. They're coming.
And then it happened—the door slammed open with force, crashing into the wall. The man who'd slapped you earlier and his two buddies stood in the doorway, their grins sickening. They were too close, and you backed up instinctively, the glass shard tight in your hand.
"Don't make this harder than it needs to be, darling," one of them said with a slur in his voice, his smirk crooked. "All we want is a little favor."
Your anger flared up. A favor? You’re out of your fucking minds.
You swung the shard at the closest guy, the blade aimed for his neck. But before you could connect, one of the others kicked you in the stomach. The impact knocked the wind out of you, sending you crashing to the ground with a sharp gasp.
You tried to push yourself up, your body aching from the fall, but the man who had kicked you grabbed your arm, dragging you to your feet. "Come on, baby. You’re gonna make this easy on us, right? Be a good little pet."
The words were too much, the rage coursing through you. Pet? You’re gonna regret this.
You struggled, kicking out at the men, but your strength was fading, your body bruised and aching. With everything inside you, you fought back, pushing them away as best as you could. But your legs buckled from the pain, and you collapsed onto the cold floor. Desperation clouded your mind as you curled up instinctively to shield yourself, closing your eyes, hoping for anything.
Sol… please… The thought of him rushed into your mind, but the darkness surrounding you felt so suffocating.
"Hey, it's not a big deal."
You barely registered the words before you felt the force of the man's body jerked off of you, thrown aside like a ragdoll.
A sickening sound filled the room—the sound of flesh slamming against flesh, followed by another impact. The harsh noise made you flinch, your body trembling as you lay on the cold floor, the shards of glass still clutched in your hand.
"That's enough, Sol..." Hyugo's voice cut through the chaos, sharp and commanding, but still there was an edge of worry underneath.
The sound of bones cracking echoed in the room, making your stomach churn. Is that...Sol?
"No," came Sol's voice, colder than ice, sharp with authority. "Not yet."
You couldn’t bring yourself to move, paralyzed with fear as the sounds of violence continued. Every punch from Sol, every crack of bone, made your heart beat faster—faster in a way you couldn’t quite explain. You should have been terrified, but part of you... part of you was strangely calm.
"That's enough, Sol! You broke his nose already!" Hyugo's voice raised, his usual calm demeanor cracking as he shouted at Sol.
But Sol didn’t stop. He was relentless, too consumed by whatever dark emotion controlled him in this moment. The thudding of his fists hitting the man reverberated in the small space, making you wince with each strike.
"Not yet." Sol’s voice was like ice again, his tone unmistakable.
Hyugo’s voice was tinged with panic now. "That's enough, Sol. Y/n needs your help."
Your heart skipped at the mention of your name. The icy grip of fear surrounding you melted for a split second as you opened your eyes, only to be met with the familiar sight of Sol’s intense gaze, his reddish-orange eyes wide with something between concern and fury.
He froze. His body stiffened, and for a moment, everything went silent.
The way he looked at you—the way he always looked at you—it wasn’t like anything else. It wasn’t just concern, nor was it just anger. His eyes softened for a brief moment, his pupils slightly dilated, his hands still clenched into fists, but now... it was like he was seeing you—really seeing you—through the chaos.
Sol kneeled beside you, his hand reaching out hesitantly. His fingers grazed your cheek, brushing away the tear that had fallen in the heat of the moment.
Sol quickly moved to your side, his eyes wide with shock, and without a word, he wrapped his arms around you in a tight embrace. His shoulders shook as he held you, his chest rising and falling rapidly as though he were trying to control his own emotions. You didn’t speak—couldn’t speak. Everything was spinning, the sounds of the scuffle still echoing in your mind, but Sol’s warmth and the way he clung to you helped you focus.
The man who had threatened you now lay still on the ground, a pool of blood slowly spreading around him. His goons were scattered around the corner, unconscious and out of the fight. Your eyes flickered to Hyugo, but the look he gave you wasn’t the usual playful kindness. His gaze was hard, his jaw tense, his eyes twitching as he let out a long, annoyed sigh. The irritation was clear on his face, but there was a sense of worry beneath it, too, as he looked at the mess Sol had made.
Hyugo finally broke the silence, his voice unusually flat. "It's getting quite late. We should head home."
He tapped Sol’s shoulder, prompting the taller male to pull away from you. Sol hesitated for a moment, his face burying deeper into your neck as if he were reluctant to let go. It was only after a few seconds that he finally loosened his grip, his hands lingering on you as if he couldn’t quite bring himself to let you go completely.
"Y/n…" Sol whispered softly, his breath warm against your skin. His voice was rough, like he was fighting something deeper inside him. He pulled back slowly, not meeting your eyes but still close enough to you that you could feel the intensity of his presence.
You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of his actions—of everything—press down on you. He had protected you... in his own way. But you didn’t know what to feel, didn’t know what to think.
Sol's eyes were bloodshot, his face flushed—whether from anger or worry, it was hard to tell. But what was evident was the silent pain he tried so hard to conceal. His emotions had broken free, and now, tears flowed freely down his cheeks.
"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have left you...I..." His voice wavered, hesitant, as he struggled to find the right words.
"Sol..." You spoke softly, gently reaching out to cup his cheek. He flinched at the touch, as if the comfort was too much to bear. The tears he had fought to hold back now poured down his face without restraint.
He relaxed after a moment, closing his eyes and leaning into your hand. He held it gently, as though he feared letting go.
"I don't know what I'd do if..." His words trailed off, the weight of his unspoken fears pressing down on him.
"It's okay... It's alright..." you reassured him, your voice calm, offering the quiet support he desperately needed. The atmosphere between you both felt heavy, yet there was an understanding, a sense of safety, in the silence that followed.
You held Sol's hands to your face, tears spilling freely from your eyes as the overwhelming emotions finally broke through. It was a short, breathless cry, but it was enough to shake you to the core. You felt his warmth, his presence grounding you as the fear and pain that had built up in you over time began to dissolve.
"Thank you... thank you, Sol..." you sobbed, your voice shaky. You almost flinched, not fully prepared for the rush of emotions, but before you could pull away, you pulled him into a tight hug. The weight of everything seemed to lift just a little as you pressed yourself into him, letting the sobs rack through your body.
Sol was frozen for a moment, shocked by the sudden outpouring. His body tensed, but then he slowly wrapped his arms around you, holding you close. His own tears continued to fall, soft and almost hesitant, as though he didn’t know what to do, but instinctively, he was there for you.
Hyugo stood nearby, watching the scene unfold. He was quiet, giving you both the space you needed. The tension that had hung between you and Sol seemed to ease as you held each other, though Sol's quiet sobs still lingered in the air. You could feel the raw emotion, the vulnerability between you, and it only made you hold on tighter.
the three of you stood there, the tension in the air thick and heavy, you felt the warmth of Hyugo’s hand slip into yours. His touch was gentle, yet firm, like he was trying to ground you in that moment, as if to reassure you that everything would be okay. But your eyes were on the plushie in his other hand— the horse plushie you had won for Sol earlier at the arcade. It seemed almost too perfect now, as if it were a symbol of everything that had happened, and everything that had changed.
You didn’t say anything about the plushie. You couldn’t. It felt strange to speak after everything, and it almost felt as if the words would break the fragile bubble that had formed between the three of you.
Sol, still lost in his guilt, stepped back. His gaze never quite met yours as he looked at the ground, a mix of regret and something deeper written across his face. His breath was shaky, his usual cool demeanor shattered. You could tell he was still processing everything, still fighting with the weight of his own emotions.
You were about to say something, Hyugo spoke up, his voice breaking the heavy silence. "It's getting dark now. We should head back," he said, his voice soft but insistent.
Sol’s hand, which had been loosely holding yours, suddenly tightened. You flinched slightly, surprised by how possessively he gripped you now. It wasn’t protective, not this time. It was as if he needed to hold onto you, as though afraid you might slip away if he didn’t.
You didn’t say anything in response. Instead, you let your fingers curl tighter around his hand, instinctively drawing closer to him. The need to stay near him, to feel his presence, was overwhelming.
Hyugo noticed, though he said nothing, his eyes glancing from you to Sol, as if understanding more than he let on.
Sol didn’t pull away, his grip on you more desperate now. His body was stiff, but you could feel the tremor in his hand. It was clear: Sol wasn’t just protecting you. He was holding onto you because he couldn’t bear the thought of losing you.
Sol’s grip on your hand remained unrelenting, his knuckles white from the intensity with which he held you. It was clear he wasn’t about to let go anytime soon. Hyugo let out a long, frustrated sigh, his eyes scanning the surroundings before looking back at the two of you.
“I guess the arcade’s off-limits for a while,” Hyugo said with a hint of concern in his voice. “Those guys might come back, and we don’t need any more trouble.”
Sol’s grip tightened even more, a subtle growl in his voice as he spoke, “If they come back... I’ll give them more than just a broken nose.”
Hyugo chuckled nervously, his hands raised in mock surrender. “You're pretty scary when you’re like this, Sol.”
A dark smirk flickered on Sol’s lips, his gaze never leaving the ground as he muttered, “Good. I’d like to keep it that way.”
Hyugo shook his head, clearly trying to lighten the mood, but Sol wasn’t having it. He rummaged through his pockets, pulling something out before handing it to Sol. You couldn’t see what it was, but from the look on Sol’s face, it was clear he wasn’t pleased.
“I told you those don’t work anymore,” Sol grumbled, his eyes narrowing as he looked at whatever Hyugo had given him.
Hyugo rolled his eyes, looking unamused. “It’s because you’re not taking them, you fool. Now, take it tonight.”
Sol scowled, like a child being scolded, but he took the object from Hyugo’s hand with a reluctant sigh. He stuffed it into his pocket without a word, his expression darkening even further.
Sol slipped the small, plastic package into his pocket, the faint sound of the crinkling plastic reached your ears, and your heart skipped a beat. You tried to shake off the feeling, but your mind couldn’t help but race. The thought of the small pill container now hidden in his pocket lingered in your thoughts.
It must be sleeping pills for Sol...
You quickly glanced away, trying to push the unsettling thought out of your head, but it only made the darkness within you swirl more intensely. Sol... You knew him. His obsession, his need for control. You didn’t want to think it, but the idea that he could use those pills on you, to make you fall asleep so he could whisper his sweet nothings... That thought lingered in your mind, and you couldn’t deny the twisted thrill that sparked within you.
How cute, right? The thought of him being so controlling over you, his obsession so deep that he would go to such lengths to ensure you never left his side, even in sleep. But you knew better than to turn a blind eye. You couldn’t afford to.
You need to watch out for your food and drinks.
You swallowed the knot in your throat, the idea of Sol having complete power over you creeping up again. The way he was so gentle, so caring on the surface, but you knew better. You knew he wanted more, and you weren't sure how far he'd go to keep you close, to make you his. But it didn’t stop you.
You want to see all of his sides.
All of his SIDES
Your hand tightened around his, and despite the dark thoughts swirling in your mind, you kept your eyes on him, on every small movement. You couldn’t let it happen. You wouldn’t let it.
You consent to him, your body is HIS.
But that didn’t mean you wouldn’t watch him. Watch his every move, keep track of every little thing he did to you.
"Anyway, your place is just around the corner... You should head back as soon as possible. I'll be taking Y/n home," Hyugo said, his voice light as he tried to steer the situation.
Sol's eyes narrowed instantly, his grip shifting from holding your hand to wrapping his arm around you possessively. His gaze turned dark, a silent challenge in his eyes as he glared at Hyugo.
"I can walk them home," Sol's voice was low, almost a growl as he squeezed your waist tighter, pulling you closer to him.
You winced slightly at the pressure, a soft hiss escaping your lips, but you couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corner of your mouth. The way Sol was acting, so protective, so obsessive—his possessiveness was palpable.
CUTE… CUTE… MINE... MINE...
You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face, your eyes fluttering slightly as they softened, the world around you blurring into nothing but Sol’s grip, his possessiveness. Your gaze turned distant, pupils dilating, heart racing as you lost yourself in the intense focus of his touch.
His arm wrapped around your waist tighter, squeezing you closer to him, and you shivered, a rush of warmth flooding through your body. CUTE… CUTE… MINE… The words reverberated in your mind, the pull of them drawing you deeper into the madness. His obsession with you was so consuming, so perfect—and you wanted more.
You stared at him with hearts in your eyes, a twisted sense of euphoria blooming in your chest. Each second, each possessive gesture, it was like a drug. You didn’t care how dark it was—this was what you wanted. You didn’t need to escape, not when he was right there, keeping you his. His jealousy, his obsession—it was all a delicious game, a dance of power and control, and you were more than happy to play your part.
Hyugo noticed the shift in the air, his gaze flicking between you and Sol, his usual carefree expression replaced with a hint of concern, though the look didn’t quite reach his eyes. Sol, however, was unwavering. The two exchanged a look—a glare full of tension, but neither one was willing to back down.
And you? You could hardly contain yourself. Watching their interaction, feeling Sol’s arm tighten, the possessiveness pouring from him, you were drunk on it. You wanted him to tighten his grip even more. To show the world you were his, that no one else could touch you. You wanted him to break anyone who dared to even look at you wrong.
Your thoughts spiraled deeper, you couldn’t help but press yourself into Sol’s side, letting him hold you tighter, letting the dark satisfaction flow through you.
"I want Sol… to accompany me home. Hyugo, you must have something to do, right?" you said, your voice sweet yet laced with an undeniable finality. Both men froze at your words, their expressions shifting like ripples in a storm.
Hyugo's brows furrowed in visible disapproval, his baby-blue eyes narrowing as if searching for the logic in your decision. Meanwhile, Sol’s face transformed. His surprise melted into something smug, his lips curling into a self-satisfied smirk, Cocky as he slowly turned his head toward Hyugo, his crimson-and-orange eyes gleaming with an unsettling mixture of delight and triumph.
"You heard them, Hyugo," Sol began, his voice dripping with false sincerity, though his amusement was impossible to hide. "I can handle this. I can walk Y/n home. Y/n trusts me. I want you to trust me, too." He closed his eyes, tilting his head slightly, feigning an air of genuine concern. But you could feel the smugness radiating off him, his grip on you subtly tightening as if staking his claim.
Hyugo’s disbelief was palpable. His jaw tensed, his fists clenched so tightly that his knuckles turned white, veins bulging under the strain. The corner of his mouth twitched, but he said nothing for a moment, the silence between the three of you thick and charged.
Finally, Hyugo sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping ever so slightly. "If that’s what you want, Y/n," he said, though his tone carried an edge of reluctant acceptance. "I can’t force you."
You gave him a soft, almost apologetic smile. "Don’t worry, Hyugo. I’m fine with however Sol is," you said, your voice gentle but deliberate. The words hung in the air, a quiet affirmation that twisted the tension into something sharper.
Hyugo’s eyes darkened for a brief moment, but he nodded. Without another word, he turned on his heel and began walking away, his footsteps heavy against the pavement. You and Sol stood together, watching his retreating figure grow smaller and smaller until he disappeared into the shadows.
The air shifted once Hyugo was gone, and you felt Sol’s smirk grow wider as he turned his gaze down to you, his hand slipping into yours, possessive and warm. His grip tightened just slightly, and your heart raced—not from fear, but from the intoxicating thrill of knowing you had chosen him.
Sol rubbed at the lingering redness in his eyes, his gaze shifting to meet yours. His voice was soft, almost vulnerable. "Why is he so bossy? Especially with you… I always thought he was the carefree type. Guess you really can’t judge a book by its cover. Funny… that’s something I tell myself all the time."
His words trailed off, his eyes flicking back to the empty path Hyugo had taken. His expression darkened for a moment, his lips pressing into a thin line. You knew what was running through his mind. Sol wasn’t just observant—he was obsessive, possessive. He knew more than he let on, always watching, always waiting. It should’ve scared you. Maybe, once, it had. But now…
You found it thrilling.
The knowledge of his fixation, his relentless need to keep you close, stirred something deep inside you. It wasn’t fear—it was desire. The darker, twisted part of you craved it, craved him. You loved the way he obsessed over you, the way his need for you bled into every little action. You wanted him closer, deeper—wrapped around you entirely.
There was no love. It was the love for his obesseion
As if sensing your thoughts, Sol’s hand found yours, his fingers curling tightly around them. His crimson-orange gaze softened as his lips curved into a boyish smile, a stark contrast to the shadows lingering in his eyes.
"What matters is that you’re here with me right now," he said, his voice filled with a strange, innocent warmth that tugged at something dark within you. "Shall we get going?"
That smile—so deceptively sweet, so utterly his—made your chest tighten. You reached out, your hand brushing through his hair in a soft, almost tender gesture. "Let’s go," you murmured, your voice carrying a faint edge of something you didn’t care to define.
Without waiting for a reply, you led him forward, your fingers still entwined with his as your other hand slipped to his arm, holding onto him as if anchoring him to you.
If he noticed the way your grip was a little too tight, your steps a little too deliberate, he didn’t say anything. Instead, his smirk lingered just long enough to let you know—he was just as lost in you as you were with him.
He doesn't know but you knew.
"Please excuse the mess," you said with a nervous chuckle, rubbing the back of your head as you opened the door and gestured for Sol to enter. "I wasn’t expecting any visitors tonight, so it’s not exactly spotless."
"I don’t mind," Sol replied softly, stepping inside. Yet, once he crossed the threshold, he didn’t move any further, lingering near the door like a statue.
His stance was stiff, almost awkward. You tilted your head, watching him curiously. Why was he acting like he hadn’t been here countless times before, sneaking in and lurking in your shadows?
"Come on, don’t just stand there," you said, taking his hand gently but firmly, leading him to the living room. Sol followed, his hand warm in yours but his body still rigid. You guided him to the couch, nudging him to sit.
He hesitated for a moment before lowering himself onto the cushions. Placing the horse plush you’d won for him carefully on the table beside him, his crimson-orange gaze flicked toward you, unreadable.
"You don’t need to be so stiff, Sol. Relax! Make yourself at home," you said, your tone soft and teasing.
"…Sorry," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "I’m just… not used to being in someone else’s space. Let alone their home."
Liar.
You bit back a knowing smile, folding your arms as you stared him down. Sol had probably been in every corner of your apartment at least once. When he stalks.
"Not even Hyugo’s?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.
Sol shook his head silently, his gaze dropping to his hands. His knuckles were bruised, faint traces of blood still visible from earlier. Your heart clenched at the sight, and without thinking, you reached out to take his hand again.
"Stop that," you scolded, catching him flexing his fingers like he was testing their strength. "Wait here. I’ll get the medical kit. And don’t you dare make things worse by straining your fists!"
"You don’t have to do this," he said softly, almost regretfully. His voice carried a tinge of sadness, his eyes flicking up to meet yours.
"My house, my rules," you shot back, planting your hands on your hips. "And I insisted on treating your wounds. So sit tight, no arguments."
Sol didn’t argue. He sat there, his body still tense, but at your words, you noticed his shoulders ease just slightly.
"Stay here," you repeated, your tone gentler this time as you turned to grab the kit.
You rummaged through your cabinets until you found the medical kit, a bit dusty from lack of use. With it in hand, you returned to the living room, where Sol was sitting exactly as you’d left him—his gaze unwavering and fixed on the spot where you had disappeared.
"Hands," you said firmly, kneeling beside him as you opened the kit.
Sol gave you a pointed look, his crimson-orange eyes narrowing slightly. "You treat me like a dog sometimes," he grumbled, holding out his bruised hands reluctantly. "But fine. Here."
You giggled, unable to help yourself at his petulant tone. "Aww, poor Sol," you teased. "But it’s not my fault you obey like one."
His cheeks flushed instantly, a deep crimson spreading up to his ears. "Y-you’re ridiculous," he muttered, turning his head slightly to hide his embarrassment, but he didn’t pull his hands away.
"Sit still," you said softly, smiling as you began to work.
Step by step, you treated his wounds. First, you gently cleaned his knuckles with a damp cloth, wiping away the dried blood and dirt. His fingers twitched in your grip, and you glanced up to see him staring at you with an unreadable expression.
"Does it hurt?" you asked, your voice almost a whisper.
"No," he said quickly, his gaze darting away. But the way his hands tensed told a different story.
Next, you dabbed at the cuts with antiseptic. His breath hitched, but he didn’t complain, only biting his lip and watching you carefully.
"You’re doing so well," you murmured, the words slipping out unconsciously.
His eyes widened briefly before softening, his lips parting as if to say something. Instead, he just nodded, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
Finally, you wrapped his knuckles in gauze, your fingers brushing against his skin as you secured the bandages. Every touch felt electric, and you swore you could feel his pulse quicken under your fingertips.
"There," you said, leaning back to admire your handiwork. "All done. See? That wasn’t so bad."
Sol flexed his fingers experimentally, then looked down at his bandaged hands. "…Thanks," he said softly, his voice carrying a weight of emotion that made your heart skip a beat.
You smiled, reaching up to brush a strand of hair out of his face. "Anytime, Sol. You’d do the same for me, wouldn’t you?"
His eyes met yours, and for a moment, the room felt impossibly still. "Always," he said, his voice low and earnest, his gaze unwavering.
Without thinking, as if guided by instinct rather than reason, you raised Sol's bandaged hand to your lips and pressed a soft kiss against the gauze. The motion was slow, deliberate, and almost reverent.
Sol's eyes widened in shock, his cheeks immediately flushing a deep crimson. He froze, utterly unprepared for the gesture. "W-what are you doing?" he stammered, his voice cracking slightly.
You smiled softly, letting his hand linger against your lips for a moment before lowering it. "Just showing my appreciation," you said.
His lips twitched, forming a pout as he glanced away, his ears burning red. "You need to stop treating me like a little kid," he mumbled, the sulkiness in his tone doing little to mask his embarrassment.
"Do you hate it?" you asked, tilting your head curiously, watching as his blush deepened.
He didn’t respond immediately. The pout on his lips faded into a silence that spoke volumes.
You chuckled softly, holding his hand against your cheek. His fingers twitched slightly, and you could feel the warmth of his skin even through the bandages. Your voice dropped to a soft, soothing murmur. "Thank you, Sol… for saving me back there. For being there when I needed you the most."
You leaned your face into his hand, closing your eyes briefly as if savoring his touch. "You were incredible," you whispered, your tone filled with admiration. "You’re always so strong, Sol. Always there to protect me. I don’t know what I’d do without you."
Your words were carefully chosen, each one designed to feed the storm of obsession you knew was brewing inside him. And oh, how he reacted.
His breath hitched audibly, his gaze fixated on you. His crimson-orange eyes were wide, shimmering with something between adoration and disbelief. His blush deepened further, spreading to his neck and ears.
"You… you mean that?" His voice was barely above a whisper, trembling slightly.
"Of course I do," you said softly, opening your eyes to meet his gaze. The way his face flushed, his lips parted as if he were about to say something, and the sheer awe in his expression—it was intoxicating.
He looked at you like you were the center of his universe, the very air he breathed. And you loved it.
He pulled his hand away slightly, but only to cup your face with both hands, his thumbs gently brushing your cheeks. His gaze burned with intensity now, his earlier shyness replaced by something darker, more consuming.
"I’ll always protect you," he murmured, his voice trembling with emotion. "No one will ever hurt you again… I won’t let them."
You smiled, leaning into his touch. "I know," you whispered. "I trust you, Sol. Completely."
The corners of his lips curved into a shaky smile, his eyes glimmering with devotion—and something even deeper, more dangerous.
You didn’t need to say it, but you both understood it:
You belonged to him, and he belonged to you.
You held Sol's hands against your face, your voice soft and trembling just enough to make it seem vulnerable. "You're the only one who's always been there for me, Sol," you murmured, letting your gaze lock onto his, wide-eyed and glimmering with sincerity. "When things get dark, when I'm scared, it's always you."
His breath caught in his throat, and his grip on your face grew firmer, as if anchoring himself to your words. His eyes were searching, desperate to believe every syllable that fell from your lips.
"I don’t know what I’d do without you," you continued, tilting your head slightly to nuzzle his palm, your voice just barely above a whisper.
The effect on him was immediate. Sol's entire body tensed, and a faint tremble ran through his fingers as he cupped your face. His eyes were swimming with emotions—guilt, adoration, obsession—all tangled together into something raw and overwhelming.
"Y/n…" His voice cracked, and he bit his lip, struggling to hold himself together.
You smiled sweetly, leaning forward just a fraction, your gaze never leaving his. "I don’t care what anyone else thinks or says. You’ve always been the one who understands me, who truly sees me. I feel safe with you, Sol... only you."
His reaction was everything you wanted. His eyes darkened, his pupils dilating as his breathing became uneven. His possessive grip returned, his fingers trembling slightly as if he was holding himself back from something primal.
But that wasn’t enough for you. His obsession was addictive, and you wanted to see more of it. To feel the heat of it consume you.
You let out a soft laugh, almost teasing, as your gaze dropped momentarily to his lips before meeting his eyes again. "You’re so good to me, Sol... so perfect. It’s almost unfair how much I need you."
His eyes widened, and his face flushed crimson. "N-need me?" he stammered, his voice trembling.
"Of course," you said, tilting your head and smiling like you’d just confessed a harmless secret. "Who else could it be? You’re the only one who’s ever truly been there for me. I can’t imagine trusting anyone else the way I trust you."
He swallowed hard, his hands twitching as if he wanted to pull you closer but wasn’t sure how much closer he could get without losing himself entirely.
And that’s when you saw it—the flicker of something darker in his eyes. A hunger, a desperate need to keep you as his, to prove he was the only one you needed.
Inside, you felt a surge of satisfaction. His reactions, his obsession, his love—it was all so deliciously intoxicating.
You leaned into his touch, your voice softening to a whisper, dripping with sweetness. "You’re all I need, Sol. Just you."
And as his trembling lips curled into a shaky smile, his eyes shining with devotion and possessiveness, you couldn’t help but think: Perfect.
You bit your lip, lowering your gaze just a fraction, feigning shyness. "I… I know it might sound silly, but after what happened, I… I don’t want to be alone. The idea of being around anyone else… guys, girls… it scares me."
You felt his hands tense against your skin.
"But with you?" You lifted your gaze to meet his, your eyes shining with unshed tears, perfectly calculated. "I feel safe. You're the only one I trust now, Sol. The only one."
He swallowed hard, his throat visibly bobbing, his expression torn between disbelief and overwhelming emotion.
"Sol… Can I… Can I stay near you from now on? Please?" You tilted your head, your voice trembling as if the thought of rejection might break you. "I just… I’m scared, Sol. Scared of everyone else after what happened. But I know you’d never let anything bad happen to me. Right?"
His face was a mixture of awe and something darker, almost feral, as if your words were wrapping around him like chains he didn’t want to escape.
"Of course," he managed, his voice thick with emotion. "You can stay close to me. Always. I won’t let anyone—anyone—hurt you again."
Your lips trembled into a small pout, and you reached up to clutch his hands tighter against your face. You tilted your head slightly, acting as though his words were an anchor for your frayed nerves.
"Thank you, Sol," you whispered, your voice breaking just the tiniest bit. "I don’t know what I’d do without you. You’re so… so good to me."
He was utterly lost in your words, his gaze unfocused and dazed, the sheer depth of his emotions cracking through the careful control he tried to maintain.
You pouted, your tone softening further, almost as if you were the one being manipulated. "I’m sorry if I’m being a burden… but I just—"
"Never," he interrupted, his voice fierce. His hands slid down to hold yours, his grip firm but trembling. "You’re never a burden. Never say that again."
Your lips curled into a small, trembling smile, and you nodded.
"I only trust you," you whispered.
Sol pressed his hand over his heart, his voice soft but firm, he swore an oath, "Let me repay your kindness, Y/n... Let me take care of you."
For a moment, you thought he was about to declare his love for you, the words hanging heavy in the air, but his gaze shifted—soft and sincere, yet with a dark undertone that made your heart race. The way he said it, with such quiet conviction, made your insides twist with longing.
You opened your mouth, ready to dismiss the idea—I don’t need you to cook for me, you were about to say, but before you could, your stomach betrayed you.
It rumbled loudly, echoing in the quiet room. Your face immediately flushed with embarrassment, and you quickly raised your hands to your cheeks, hiding the red tint creeping up your skin.
Sol's eyes softened immediately, his lips curling into a smile as he gently reached for your hands, pulling them away from your face. His expression was so gentle, yet his eyes gleamed with that possessive, dark affection you knew all too well.
"Don't hide yourself from me, Y/n," he murmured, his voice low and tender as he gazed at you with that intoxicating intensity. "You don't have to be ashamed... you're perfect." His words hung in the air, thick with affection and something far deeper, a touch of madness lurking beneath the surface.
You couldn’t look away from his face, the overwhelming wave of love and obsession clouding your thoughts. Your heart hammered in your chest as your stomach growled once more, and you instinctively reached out to clutch your face, like you were posing in the way you’d seen in shows, but this was real, and he was here.
"Sol..." you whispered, your voice trembling slightly, "No cooking. You don’t have to do that."
But he didn’t listen. He wasn’t the type to back down when he had a plan.
He pouted, a playful, childlike expression crossing his features, and it made him look even more endearing—if that was even possible. "I want to, Y/n," he said softly, his voice now a low, adoring murmur. "Let me take care of you... let me make you happy."
His words, so sincere and desperate, sent a shiver through you.
With a final, tender glance at you, Sol turned and walked toward the kitchen. Each step he took seemed deliberate, as though he was placing himself further and further into your world, making himself indispensable.
You stood frozen, your eyes wide and heart heavy with a mixture of longing and something darker—an obsession of your own that mirrored his.
You blinked at Sol's grumpy face, his pout so endearing it nearly made you want to melt. He crossed his arms in that way that made him look both cute and frustratingly determined. "Alright, fine, I’ll cook for you."
He still looked a little upset, but his eyes softened slightly when you said it. "Okay," he mumbled, a slight pout still lingering on his lips. You smiled inwardly at how adorable he was when he tried to act tough, especially for you.
You both moved toward the kitchen, and you asked softly, "Anything you like? I can make whatever you want…"
Sol thought for a moment, his eyes flicking away, as if he were deliberating. Then, with a whisper barely audible, he said, "As long as it’s from you, Y/n…"
Your heart skipped a beat. His words were a quiet confession wrapped in a thread of possessiveness that sent a thrill through you. As long as it’s from me, he wanted nothing more than something made by your hands. The thought of him depending on you, wanting you in this way, made the dark thoughts swirl in your mind.
You felt the weight of the moment, suddenly aware of the kitchen, of what you were about to do. You hadn’t cooked for anyone before. Your mind raced as you stood in front of the sink. What the hell am I doing?
You were never the type to entertain guests. You were just a lonely little thing, someone who spent their time sketching, daydreaming, and obsessing over people like Sol. Did he really want this? Did he really want me to cook for him?
You felt the panic rising in your chest, but before you could overthink it any further, Sol stood up from the table, his movements casual but with a focused intensity. He began inspecting the cupboards, muttering under his breath.
"Your cupboards are pretty empty," he said, his tone casual but with a hint of concern. "No groceries?"
You shrugged slightly, not wanting to go into details. No groceries… no one to buy them for. "I’ve been busy," you said, your voice trailing off. You didn’t mention how you had been busy sketching his face, obsessing over him, imagining every detail of his being.
Sol gave you a questioning glance, but then he let it slide. His eyes scanned the shelves again, and then his gaze softened when he reached for something in the back.
"Not completely empty," he said with a small, amused smile. He pulled out a box of curry powder and handed it to you. "Here. You can use this."
Your heart fluttered, but it wasn’t just the fact that he had given you something to cook with—it was that he knew you hide that curry where exactly.
IM so sorry for dividing this next part will be last!
also, yes if it's not clear by now, Reader only likes his obsession on them than himself </3 i guess the talk abt crowe already made it clear
until next time
-ellie <3
#the kid at the back vn#solivan brugmansia#tkatb#tkatb sol#visual novel#tkatb x reader#solvian x reader#the kid at the back sol#sol x reader#the kid at the back x reader#tkatb vn#tkatb crowe#the kid at the back crowe#sol brugmansia#the kid at the back
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Don't you realize that male and female are social constructs? They're ideas. Scientists don't even believe biological sex is a thing anymore, we're all just people. Gender is almost like religion, it can change, some people are really sure on theirs and others aren't, forcing someone into one is always wrong. Do you know why you're cis? Do you ever think about the possibility that you're not, about what it would be like to be something other then what you were born as. Would you still feel like a woman if you didn't have a womb, if you didn't have breasts or genitals or estrogen? It was a combination of contemplating these things, and mystical experiences with the goddess Hel that got me to realize I was agender. I thought I would lose certain things when becoming nonbinary and genderless, but I didn't. I don't know about you, but know you can be happy as an enby or a boy, you can be loved, and cherished and comforted as an enby or as a boy. I don't know if you're nonbinary like I am. You might find you really do identify with womanhood, but if you do really want to be a woman, then know that that's the same feeling amab women have. I know what it's like to think the way you do, I used to think that way, and I've had bad experiences with men and with the expectations society has for people with bodies like mine. But you don't have to take your pain and call it womanhood.
I'm not cis.
I didn't choose to be a woman.
I don't identify as a woman.
I don't feel like a woman.
I simply am a woman.
And being a woman isn't a social construct or an idea.
Being a woman is a biological reality.
I was born with a female body. That's a fact. It's not something I can change.
Saying that scientists don't believe in biological sex is a blatant lie. I can't believe that it needs to be said, but male and female bodies differ not only on the outside. We get affected by different conditions & illnesses. We have different immune systems. We have different pain levels. We have different hormones & health issues related to them. We respond differently to drugs and their dosages. Not to mention our reproductive systems and everything related to them. Our bodies are far away from being just a concept.
Being a woman in itself doesn't make me happy or unhappy. Just like being white & Polish doesn't make me happy or unhappy. Those are just facts about me.
And being a woman doesn't mean that I have to look or act in a specific way. What is womanhood for you if you think that males can identify with it? Is it about wearing dresses and makeup and acting silly? If a man does that then he's a woman? And if a woman doesn't do that then she's not a woman? It's absurd.
If you claimed that one can identify with a specific race by acting & looking in a specific way, everyone would (rightfully) say that it's offensive. Racial stereotypes are not okay, but gender stereotypes are fine & valid? Both sex and race are in the same category of material reality.
Being a woman doesn't determine who I am as a person. Being a woman is not a personality trait, just as race isn't. I don't have to do certain things so I can call myself a woman. There are no certain things one can do in order to "become" a woman.
But being a woman does shape my position in society and it also shapes yours, whether you like it or not. You can identify as whatever you want. It doesn't change the fact that society sees you as a woman. You can't identify out of oppression. You can't stop identifying with pay gap. You can't stop identifying with your reproductive rights being taken away. You can't stop identifying with the fact that women are being raped and killed by men everywhere, everyday. Women in Afghanistan can't stop identifying with the education ban.
Goddess Hel won't help you once men decide to take your rights away. Identifying as agender won't either. Stop being delusional for your own sake before reality slaps you in the face.
#ask#delulu#radfem#radical feminism#radfem safe#radblr#radfems do interact#feminism#radfems do touch#women's rights#women's liberation#adult human female#sex not gender#gender stereotypes#gender critical#gender roles#liberal feminism#agender#gender identity
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More about GGG's finale and core plot (that is, BIG SPOILERS BELOW)
One recurring trend is loneliness. King's actions help connect people, and our protagonist continues in her footsteps, but the loneliness of the characters who play antagonists is especially notable.
The God Awards (which I've mentioned before, the whimsy of them made me totally blip over the red flags and implications) mention Inspekta doing everything for them. What would they be without him, Capochin asks?
"Lonely!"
Inspekta gathered the lonely hearts together. Gave them purpose. Gave them a charismatic leader to follow.
Saul is one of the most antagonistic non-Bizzy humans, and a recurring refrain in Milldread is how lonely everyone is. How gatherings are now somehow either discouraged or outright illegal (hmm, wonder whose idea that was). In fact, most of the Milldread citizens only have good or at least compassionate things to say about him.
(Sometimes I feel like the antagonists are shown a little much compassion given the way this plot goes, but it is also important to remember that deprogramming cultists etc. is based around showing compassion and reminding them that the world is not innately hostile to them. And there's only so much a single game can say in the span of a few hours, so, like, I get it.)
In fact, you have to insult Saul twice to progress in Milldread. How do you do this?
One, you get a dog to make a dog noise, and Saul loses it and comes over to harass the dog (and fail).
Two, after this point, he'll say that he "hates that shaggy little man". This is the line you need to give Budd to progress. When he asks for an insult levied at Saul, you can travel the town... and find that everyone has good things to say about him. He's misled, he's actually very sweet, his friends miss him.
It's very telling that the only way to effectively insult Saul to Budd is to use his own words to do it. Even writing this, I realize that this also implies a bit of a persecution complex with Saul - the people around him don't hate him, or even think he's particularly incompetent. They're worried about him. They understand that he's stressed. He was lead astray by a bad element but he snaps out of it (with help) in time to rejoin his community.
And speaking of throwing words back in faces...
Capochin shows a pretty regular skill for recognizing voices when you fling words at him - it's funny, because a lot of people in this game don't, so he's an outlier and that's amusing. In the battle against him, it means you have to work around him - you can't use his own words against him directly.
Instead, you put words in "Inspekta"'s mouth and bring that to Capo.
He shows an awareness, to a level, that this isn't really Inspekta talking. But this realization is a long time coming, and he can't repress it anymore. He can't deny reality when it's thrown in his face, when he's all alone, when nobody wants to work with him anymore. When even his god is only using him, spending more time with the Godpoke, leading him astray.
The Bizzyboys (and Hector; Yugo Limbo said that all of them come from Drain, hence them looking alike(?) ) evoke a very specific type of person, to me: the incel. Or at least, something adjacent. They're all referred to as "he" as Bizzys (I'm of a mind that Bizzyboys are all he/him while Bizzy, as, like, an honorary gender, mostly because it's just a silly idea; though in retrospect it also meshes with the enforced similarity situation). They're all lonely. They've banded together under a mutual purpose, but they don't really support each other.
And when they start to, between Hobbyhoo and BuzzHuzz? When they begin to collaborate, talk about taking a break from all this fash shit "investigating"?
Capochin shuts them down. Hard.
And Patty says he's scared of Capochin, but the other Bizzies say he would never hurt any of them. But when Capochin blows his top, all of them get really timid.
Capochin not getting involved in the violence until there's literally no one else to hide behind is so cliche that it almost just seems like a joke, until I took in the rest of the story.
Playing this game makes me think a lot of Fallout: New Vegas, a game where you can also destroy fascism and avert a cataclysm as a vaquero-themed courier.
One thing that becomes achingly clear in FNV is how the Legion is a cult of personality: it's not just the Legion, it's Caesar's Legion. Legate Lanius is terrifying, yes, but nobody talks about him as a leader so much as a warrior. Once Caesar dies, it seems obvious to me that the entire thing is going to crumple like a house of cards. Caesar didn't leave any backup plans, any true heirs, because the whole thing was his vanity project. There's no point to the Legion without Caesar, and he never once considered that there should be.
Inspekta and the Bizzyboys work very similarly. The whimsy and goofiness of the setting, which we also see in Smile For Me, lead me to miss some major red flags (I am also just. very dense.), which is a known problem in real fascism - the use of cutesy facades to cast absurdity on any claims of propaganda.
Anyways. My point is that the Bizzyboys seem at first to be a group, but are really more underlings in a cult of personality. Everything falls apart when faith in the system - in Capochin, in Inspekta - is lost. And Capochin is the Joshua Graham to Inspekta's Caesar; both of them culpable, both of them seeming in charge, with Capochin primed to take the fall as soon as things go wrong. But he volunteered for that! He wanted to be Inspekta's #1! The right-hand chump! The prime goon! He's getting everything he ever worked for, so don't question the system, Capo, because that's the same as doubting Inspekta. And doubting Inspekta means you're not a good Bizzyboy. Means you're ungrateful. Means that maybe what you have should go to someone who'll appreciate it.
They literally have their names stripped away - and I think the constant belittling and name-withholding of Patty, who genuinely displays real competence and intelligence at points if you pay attention, is a deliberate ploy. You don't want to be like P. You don't want to be a failure. Look at you, earning your letters! You almost have a full name! Not like that loser at the bottom of the barrel. You're a real winner, here.
And you, P? You need to try harder. Look how Alexei has his whole name back for doing hardly anything! How can you fail to get even a single letter back, compared to him? When Patty asks for his name back in Milldread, Capochin mentions solving mysteries - mysteries of "what does Capochin want for lunch", etc. It's silly, but it's also sinister. It's the most overtly self-centered bit of Bizzy lore we get for maybe the whole game. Capochin outright says he comes first and we laugh because of the delivery.
(The videos are fantastic, because they really set up the reveal in a lot of both subtle and unsubtle ways. Even the very first video, where Capochin insults Patty for asking a scripted question, before moving into the answer, is foreshadowing for the constant emotional abuse all of the Bizzys and Patty in particular are subjected to. There's probably much more I'm forgetting.)
Under the whimsy and humor of the game is a very real statement about cults and fascism and the kinds of people they recruit, and how they do it. They amplify the concerns of the disenfranchised and alone, people who have difficulty connecting with a community. They give those people somewhere to belong, ideals to uphold, and targets to gang up on.
Anyways. Good game.
#elk text#ggg spoilers#bolded for readability i hope#ggg p#bizzyboy p#and all the rest#i am not an expert this is just my personal take#great god grove#im not gonna call this an analysis bc i think that's overselling it but it's... close?
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Prompt angst 1 with Robin where reader hangs out less and less with Robin and when confronted it’s because she likes her but can’t compete with Vickie
What’s the point of trying if it just proves that I’ll never be good enough?
I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
I hate her
Y/N tried her best to not fall for Robin's pretty face and clumsy personality. They were meant to be friends and nothing more, but Robin made her heart race and palms sweaty. But it didn't matter how Robin made her feel, she wasn't the one Robin wanted.
Robin had a crush on Vickie for over three months and it was silently killing Y/N. She was a good friend so she listened to Robin declare her love for Vickie all day every day. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt so bad if she was honest about how she felt. There was a time before Vickie, when Robin and Y/N were dancing over the friend line. A slight tease of what could be and Y/N basked in it until the light went out.
Now it was all Vickie. Robin didn't even spare a second glance at Y/N anymore. Vickie seemed to offer something better and Y/N couldn't help but feel replaced. She felt as if her efforts weren't good enough and it stung. Whatever Robin wanted from Vickie, Y/N could easily do. She felt like a kid begging for attention, doing anything to get Robin to look her way.
Y/N felt tired of trying. She was tired of how upset she felt whenever Robin turned to Vickie instead. Y/N was the original but Robin didn't seem to care. Y/N knew she deserved someone better and someone who made her feel first.
She began to spend less time with Robin, letting her heart heal. She didn't want their friendship to end but she needed space. At first, it seemed like Robin didn't notice and that made Y/N feel even worse. It hurt to see Robin focus all her attention on someone that wasn't her. The jealousy wasn't firey, it was more cold. She wasn't jealous in the way she wanted to show Vickie who Robin belonged to, it was the painful jealousy that kept her up at night and made her think less of herself.
As the days passed, Y/N barely saw Robin. Which is what she wanted but it proved that she only saw Robin when she initiated it. Robin didn't bother to make time to see her, which made her think the friendship might not be worth saving.
~~~
Robin swallowed her tears as she saw Vickie press her lips against a guy. They seemed familiar with each other, almost like they were a couple. Robin had this hope that Vickie was gay but she was wrong.
Steve placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, knowing how crushing the moment was for Robin. But Robin shoved his hand off and ran out of the store. She allowed herself to cry once she made it outside, the reality that she and Vickie would never be settling in.
~
Y/N was surprised to see Robin at her door but welcomed her in.
"What are you doing here?" Y/N asked, and her question sent Robin into a breakdown. Robin sobbed, making Y/N's heartbreak. She quickly wrapped her arms around her, trying to calm her down. "What's wrong?"
Robin pulled away to collect herself, wiping off her face. "Vickie has a boyfriend," she said in between tears. Y/N fought back the want to roll her eyes. She was unsuccessful in holding back her scoff though, easily catching Robin's attention.
"What?"
"I haven't seen you in days and you finally come but it's because you want comfort because of Vickie!" Y/N exclaimed, annoyance clear in her voice.
"I need my friend! Which you haven't been for the past few days," Robin bit back, her blue eyes squinting into a glare. Y/N laughed humorlessly, she crossed her arms and created more space between them.
"And yet you never cared enough to ask so seems like we are both shitty friends," Y/N snapped, a sharp smile on her face.
"What is your problem? What's with the sudden cold shoulder?" Robin asked she wanted her friend but she couldn't find her. "All I wanted was some comfort after my heart was shattered and you don't seem to give a shit."
"Because I don't, Robin!" Y/N snapped, her voice slightly rising. "I don't care about Vickie and I don't care about your love for her. I never cared and I never will. I hate Vickie. I hate the way she makes me feel and I hate how much you feel for her."
"What is that supposed to mean? How can you hate her when you've never had a conversation with her?"
"It doesn't matter," Y/N shrugged. "Maybe you should go."
But Robin stayed put. "No, we are going to talk. You are done avoiding me. I don't know what your problem is with Vickie but she doesn't deserve your cold treatment."
"What’s the point of trying if it just proves that I’ll never be good enough?. What is the point of telling you how much I'm in love with you when you'll never look my way? My problem with her is that you love her, Robin. And you don't love me." Y/N admitted, tears falling down her face as she looked at the floor.
Robin was stunned. She never once thought her best friend was in love with her. Hell, she didn't even know she was into girls. Robin swallowed her spit as she felt her throat get dry.
"I-um-I" Robin stuttered, truly at a loss for words. "I don't know what to say. I'm sorry."
Y/N bit down on the inside of her cheek, trying to keep more sobs back. "Can you just tell me if there's a chance for us?"
Robin looked into her wet eyes, watching the tears disappear down her chin. She watched as Y/N chewed on her cheek, trying to stand strong but it was clear to tell she was falling apart.
"No," Robin whispered, her heart aching as Y/N turned away from her. She reached out but Y/N flinched away.
"Please leave"
"Y/N, can we please talk through this," Robin pleaded. She didn't want to lose a friend. Y/N shook her head, still not turning around as a few cries left her mouth.
"No, Robin. No amount of talking will make this work. I can't be your friend, it's too hard," she sobbed.
"So that's it? We just walk away and never talk again? That's not fair!" Robin fought.
Y/N turned around a defeated look on her face. "I don't care. I need to be done."
Robin scoffed, she couldn't believe Y/N was going to throw away their friendship over something Robin couldn't control. Y/N was determined, and she wasn't going to change her mind.
"Fine, have a nice life," Robin spat as she walked out the door. Y/N closed her eyes as the door slammed, the sound ringing in her ears.
She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. It was going to be hell getting over her but it was possible. And she knew she'd be okay in the end.
#robin buckley fanfic#robin buckley x reader#robin buckley#robin buckley x female reader#robin buckley angst#robin buckley angst x female reader#robin buckley angst x reader#robin buckley requests#ashwhowrites
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Rage and Redemption Part 3
Bruce Wayne X Adapted(Female) Reader
Summery: After losing your parents, staying at a unloving orphanage, you are adapted by Bruce Wayne. But you make it clear to him, that you don't want to live with him and that you plan to make him regret taking her in. While Bruce makes it clear that he's not give up on you and he'll be there to help you heal.
Rating: slight angst, cursing, flipping the finger, happy ending?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 4
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A week goes by and you find yourself in the back of Ms. Jenkin's car, the leather seats sticking to your skin from the nervous sweat. You don't know where you're going, only that Ms. Jenkins had told you to get dressed and pack your things. You've never been off the orphanage grounds since you arrived, and the outside world seems to buzz with a strange energy that makes you both anxious and excited.
"Where are you taking me?" you ask, your voice edged with defiance and a hint of a smirk. "Are you finally throwing me off a bridge like you threatened?"
Ms. Jenkins' eyes narrow in the rearview mirror. "Your humor is as distasteful as your behavior," she snaps, her knuckles whitening on the steering wheel.
You shrug, unbothered. "So, where am I going?"
Ms. Jenkins' grip tightens on the wheel. "To your new home," she says through clenched teeth.
"As if," you murmur under your breath. "New home." The words taste sour. You've heard that before. The "new home" was just a new set of bars, a different cage with different faces.
"Do I at least get my picture back?" you spit out, the question burning on your tongue like a live coal.
Ms. Jenkins' eyes meet yours in the mirror, cold and unyielding. "You'll get it when you learn to behave properly," she repeats, the words sticking to the air like a bad smell.
You lean back in the seat, arms crossed over your chest, staring out the window as the cityscape passes by. The buildings grow taller, the cars shinier. You've never been to this part of Gotham before. It's cleaner, brighter, and a stark contrast to the grimy streets you've come to know. The sight fills you with a mix of anger and envy.
As the car approaches a massive, iron gate, it slows down. You can see the name "Wayne Manor" etched into the metal, surrounded by lush greenery and a sense of peace that feels eerily out of place in the chaos of the city. Above the gate, a camera swivels into view, the speaker crackling to life. "Name," a disembodied voice asks.
Ms. Jenkin looks to the camera, her smile forced and brittle. "Ms. Jenkins, Bruce Wayne should be expecting me," she says, her voice tight with annoyance. The gates to the Wayne Manor begin to swing open, revealing a sprawling estate that seems to breathe wealth and opulence, a stark contrast to the stark reality of the orphanage. The car glides up the winding driveway, the tires whispering over the gravel.
You find yourself captivated as you gaze out the window, your eyes wide and unblinking, taking in the breathtaking landscape that unfolds like a beautiful painting. The sprawling lawns are a lush sea of vibrant emerald green, stretching endlessly toward the horizon, their gentle undulations mimicking the waves of an ocean. Scattered throughout are perfectly manicured gardens, bursting with colorful blossoms and lush foliage, each one looking as if it has been lovingly curated from the pages of a whimsical fairytale.
Ahead of you stands the manor, a majestic edifice of weathered stone and lush ivy that appears to rise organically from the earth. Its grandeur is both imposing and enchanting, with tall, pointed gothic arches that reach skyward and intricate stonework that tells a story of bygone elegance. The windows, set like glittering jewels within the façade, catch the sunlight, reflecting it with a dazzling brilliance that transforms the whole structure into a shimmering beacon of beauty. The scene is a harmonious blend of nature and architecture, creating an inviting yet mysterious atmosphere that beckons you to explore further.
The car stops in front of the grand entrance, and Ms. Jenkins turns the engine off before turning in her seat to you, her eyes bore into yours, "I don’t want to see you again after today. You are to be a perfect child to Mr. Wayne," she says, her voice cold and unforgiving. "Because I wouldn’t be taking you back," she adds, her voice dropping to a whisper, "You can take your attitude and your brattiness to the streets, I don’t care. Just don’t come back to me."
You grin, not out of joy, but rather out of spite. "Yeah, sure," you say, mimicking her sweet tone. "I'll be as perfect as you are."
The sarcasm hangs in the air like a toxic fog, and Ms. Jenkins' eyes narrow. "This is your only chance at a real home," she says, her voice a warning. "Don't throw it away."
With a jerk, she opens the car door and stands, gesturing for you to get out. You do so with a dramatic sigh, dragging your trash bag with very little belongs, and slamming the door behind you. The sound echoes through the quiet, serene air of the manor's grounds, a stark contrast to the cacophony of the city.
You approach the imposing front door, which seems to loom over you, taunting you with its grandeur. Before you can knock, it swings open, revealing a stern-faced butler dressed in a crisp, black suit. His eyes sweep over you, taking in your disheveled appearance and the tension that practically radiates from your every pore.
"Welcome to Wayne Manor," he says, his voice as cold as the marble steps you ascend. You follow Ms. Jenkins into the foyer, where the scent of polished wood and fresh flowers fills the air. It's a world away from the stale odor of the orphanage, and your nose wrinkles in an involuntary reaction to the unfamiliar smells.
The grandeur of the manor is overwhelming. The high ceilings are painted with scenes of mythological battles, and the walls are adorned with tapestries that tell ancient stories of valor and honor. The floor is made of gleaming black and white tiles that seem to stretch into infinity. You feel like an ant in a palace, insignificant and out of place.
Then, you hear the sound of footsteps, measured and precise, echoing down the grand staircase that spirals up into the heart of the manor. Your heart races as Bruce Wayne descends, his figure cast in shadow until the last step brings him into the light. He's dressed in casual clothes, but there's something about the way he carries himself that screams power and wealth.
"Hello," he says, his voice warm and surprisingly gentle. "It's nice to finally make your acquaintance properly. I'm Bruce." he extends his hand.
You look at his hand for a moment, contemplating the gesture. Then, with a smirk, you bring your hand up, not to shake his but to give him the finger, flipping him off with a twist of your wrist.
Ms. Jenkins gasps, her hand flying to her mouth in shock. "You little-!" she starts to scold, but Bruce holds up his hand, silencing her. He smiles, a ghost of amusement flitting across his face, and takes a step closer to you, leaning down with his hands on his knees.
"I see you've got some fire in you," he says, his eyes twinkling. "That's good. You're going to need it."
You cross your arms and scoff. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Bruce's smile turns into a grin. "It means," he says, his eyes never leaving yours, "that I know you're not a quitter. And I'm not either."
He stands back up, his towering presence seeming to fill the room. "Thank you, Ms. Jenkins," he says calmly. "Alfred will see you out."
Ms. Jenkins sputters, but Alfred steps forward with a nod, taking her by the elbow. "Right this way, ma'am," he says, guiding her out of the room with surprising gentleness.
The door closes with a soft click, leaving you and Bruce standing in the opulent foyer, the silence heavy with anticipation. For a moment, you just stare at him, your heart thudding in your chest.
"Well," Bruce says, breaking the tension. "Why don't I show you your room?"
"You mean my cell?" you reply with a sneer.
Bruce chuckles, a warm sound that seems out of place in the cold, unfeeling world you've come to know. He leans down again, his eyes searching yours, and says, "I mean your room, where you can keep your things, sleep, and maybe even find a bit of peace." He stands back up, the smile on his face unwavering.
He starts up the stairs, his steps echoing through the cavernous foyer. The tapestries whisper secrets as you follow him, your sneakers squeaking against the polished marble. The grandeur of the place feels like a prison, each step further inward a silent confinement to a gilded cage. But something in his eyes gives you a glimmer of hope—a hint of understanding, perhaps.
As you reach the top of the stairs, he points to a long hallway lined with portraits of stern-looking ancestors. "There are rooms for each of the boys I've adopted. Dick's is there," he points to the first door, "Jason's is next to it," he indicates the second door, "Tim's is down there," he nods to the third, "And Damian's is at the end."
You raise an eyebrow. "You have more prisoners?" you say, trying to keep the sarcasm from your voice.
Bruce laughs, the sound surprisingly warm. "I like to think of them as… part of the team," he says, his smile not reaching his eyes. "But let's not get ahead of ourselves. This," he opens the last door on the left, "is where you'll be staying."
He opens the door, and you step into a bedroom that's bigger than your entire old apartment. The walls are a soft blue, the color of a quiet night sky, and the bed looks like it could swallow you whole. There's a desk with books lined up neatly, a wardrobe that seems to stretch on forever, and a window that looks out over the lush gardens.
"What? No swimming pool?" You deadpan, trying to keep the awe out of your voice.
Bruce chuckles, the sound bouncing off the walls. "No, there's one right outside. But I'm sure you'll find your tub to be more big enough," he says with a wink.
You roll your eyes. "Very funny," you mumble, moving to the bed and dropping your trash bag on the floor with a thud.
"But if you don't find that satisfying enough," he walks to two double doors on the opposite side of the room, "your library is right through here." He opens the doors to reveal a space that takes your breath away.
The walls of the cozy room are lined from floor to ceiling with sturdy wooden shelves, each one brimming with books in diverse shapes and sizes, their spines a kaleidoscope of colors. In the middle of the quite room a charming swing chair hangs from the ceiling, gently swaying back and forth as if inviting you to settle into its embrace. The soft creak of the chair complements the soothing ambiance of the room.
In corner, the warm glow of a crackling fireplace casts a flickering light, illuminating the space and creating a welcoming atmosphere. The dancing shadows throw whimsical patterns onto the plush, deep-colored carpet, enhancing the feeling of warmth and comfort.
A beautifully designed window seat, framed by large, arched windows, is tucked into the bay, overflowing with an array of sumptuous velvet cushions. These cushions, in rich jewel tones, beckon enticingly, inviting you to sink in and find a cozy spot to immerse yourself in the pages of a captivating book.
Overall, the room serves as a tranquil sanctuary, a perfect escape where you can lose yourself in fantastical worlds, far removed from the harsh and gritty reality of Gotham outside. It is a haven for readers and dreamers alike, nurturing the imagination and offering solace in its warm embrace.
You wander over to the swing, tentatively giving it a push. It glides back and forth with a gentle, soothing motion that feels alien to your jaded soul. The books on the shelves seem to whisper promises of adventure and solace, each one a gateway to a new life. You reach out to touch one, the spine cool and smooth under your fingertips as you pull it out, the title blurring before your eyes as you struggle to read it.
"I don't like to read," you lie, the words feeling like sandpaper against your tongue. You drop the book onto the floor with a thud that seems to echo through the vastness of the library as if you've committed some great betrayal.
Bruce watches as you leave the library, the lie hanging in the air like a forgotten echo. He knows you're lying—it's written all over your face, in the way your eyes lingered on the book, in the gentle caress of your fingertips on the spine. But he says nothing, allowing the moment to pass.
He follows you back to your bedroom, his footsteps silent on the plush carpet that muffles the sound of his heavy boots. The doors swing shut behind him with a soft click, closing out the rest of the world. The room feels smaller now, the grandeur of the manor receding into the background as he stands in the doorway, watching you with a mixture of curiosity and concern.
"If you don't like to read," he asks gently, his voice a soothing balm to your jagged nerves, "then what's something you do like?"
You look at him for a long moment, weighing your words. "Why do you wanna know?" you ask, jumping onto the bed, the mattress sinking beneath your weight. You bounce once, twice, a childish act that feels surprisingly liberating in the face of his expectant gaze.
Bruce doesn’t flinch, his eyes never leaving yours. He takes a step into the room, his posture relaxed yet commanding. "Because," he says, his voice soft, "I want to get to know you. I want to understand what makes you tick. And maybe," he adds with a small smile, "I want to help you find a way to heal."
You scoff, the sound of a harsh bark in the pristine silence of the room. "Heal?" you repeat, your voice laced with sarcasm. "I'm fine." But even to your ears, the lie sounds hollow.
Bruce crosses his arms over his chest, his eyes never leaving yours. "We all have scars," he says, his voice gentle but firm. "Some are just more visible than others."
You roll your eyes, the smirk never leaving your face. "Spare me the motivational speech. I've heard it all before," you reply, your voice a sneer.
Bruce's smile falters for just a moment, but he quickly recovers. "I'm not here to give you a speech," he says, his voice firm. "I'm here to offer you a home and a family."
You snort, the sound echoing in the large room. "I don't need a family," you spit out, your voice harsh. "I don't need anyone."
Bruce's eyes darken slightly, a hint of sadness flickering across his features before it's quickly masked. "Everyone needs someone," he counters, his voice firm.
"Not me," you reply, "I don't need you or your pity. I'm just fine on my own."
Bruce's gaze remains steady, his eyes piercing through the facade of anger you've built around yourself. "You may think that," he says calmly, "but I've seen the look in your eyes when you think no one's watching. I know you're hurting."
"You don't know anything about me," you spit out, your fists clenching tighter. The words are a challenge, a barbed wire fence you've constructed around your heart, daring him to try to get through.
Bruce's gaze doesn't waver. "I know enough," he says, his voice low and even. "I know that you've been through something unimaginable. I know that you're hurting, and I know that you're scared."
You laugh, a harsh, bitter sound that fills the room. "Scared? Me?" you challenge, taking a step closer to him. "You think I'm scared of you?"
Bruce's expression remains calm, almost serene. "I don't think you're scared of me," he says, his voice steady. "But I do think you're scared of letting anyone in. Letting anyone see the pain behind that tough exterior."
You snarl, the anger burning in your eyes. "That what you think? You think I'm just this sad, little girl who's lost everything?"
Bruce doesn't flinch. "No," he says, his voice calm and even. "I think you're a survivor. You've been through hell and come out the other side. And now, you're trying to keep everyone at bay because it's easier than letting them in and getting hurt again. You act up, push people away, because you think that's the only way to protect yourself. But it doesn't have to be that way."
You stare at him, your chest heaving with the effort to hold back the tears that threaten to spill over. His words cut through the armor you've so carefully constructed, exposing the raw, tender wound beneath. You want to scream, to yell, to lash out at this stranger who seems to see right through you. But instead, you clench your fists even tighter.
"I think I should make something clear, old man," you say, your voice low and steady, the smirk on your lips growing into a full-blown grin. "I don't plan to be a sad story for you to tell at your fancy parties. I'm going to make sure your life is a living hell. You'll regret ever taking me in."
Bruce's smile never falters, his eyes twinkling with a hint of amusement. "Is that so?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.
You nod, your smile a challenge. "You just watch me," you say, the smugness in your voice unmistakable.
Bruce leans down, his gaze locking onto yours. "I think there's something you should know then," he says, his voice a gentle rumble, "I'm a big believer in seeing the best in people. And I see something in you, something that's worth fighting for. So, go ahead, test me. I've faced worse. But want I want you to know is that no matter how much you push, I'm not going anywhere. And neither are you. Not unless you really want to."
You glare at him, the fire in your eyes burning brighter. "I'm no quitter," you say, your voice filled with a fierce determination that surprises even yourself. You've lived on the streets, faced the Joker, and survived an explosion. You're not about to let a fancy manor and a billionaire who thinks he can save you break you.
Bruce walks to the door, his hand on the knob. "Dinner will be served in an hour," he says, his tone still calm. "I'll have Alfred show you around until then. Oh and, " he adds with a hint of mischief, "try not to cause too much trouble before then, okay?"
You shoot him a look that could set the curtains on fire. "Sure thing, pops," you say with a smirk, the words dripping with sarcasm. Bruce chuckles, the sound low and warm, and you can't help but feel a strange warmth in your chest. It's been a long time since anyone has tried to tease you, to treat you like a normal kid.
But you're not a normal kid, are you? You're a survivor of the Joker's wrath, a girl who's been through hell and back, and now you're standing in the bedroom of a billionaire's mansion. It's all too much to process.
You wander over to the bedside table, drawn by the glint of something shiny. There is a small, simple frame. Your heart skips a beat when you see your family photo inside—the same one that had been in the purse you stole.
With trembling hands, you quickly pick it up, taking it out of the frame. The glass is cool against your fingertips, the edges sharp. You bring the photo closer to your face, breathing in the scent of home that seems to cling to the fading ink. You trace the outlines of your mother's nose, and your father's eyes, memorizing the contours of their faces as if you could bring them back to life with enough willpower.
For a moment, you're lost in the past, in a time before the fire and the chaos. Before the Joker and the pain. But then the reality of your present crashes over you like a cold wave, and you realize that this is your new reality. The orphanage is behind you, and Bruce Wayne is your new...what? Savior? Father? Jailer?
Bruce watched from the gap in the doorway as the girl discovered the family photo, his smile gentle and knowing. He'd placed it there on purpose, hoping it would offer some small comfort amidst the overwhelming change. The way she held it to her chest, eyes scanning the familiar faces, told him more than any words could about the depth of her pain.
As she traced the outline of her mother's nose and her father's eyes, Bruce felt a pang of sorrow for her loss. He knew what it was like to have your world torn apart, to feel the burning rage of injustice. But unlike him, she was still so young, her wounds fresh and raw.
He stepped away from the doorway, allowing her a moment of privacy with her memories. He knew she needed it, needed to feel the pain and anger without the burden of his watchful gaze. The hallway outside was silent, the manor's grandeur a stark contrast to the quiet, personal battle playing out in the room behind him.
Part 4
#batman#bat family#dc universe#dc fandom#batfamily#bruce wayne#bruce x orphan reader#bruce wayne x reader#batman x reader#batman x little girl#orphan reader
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Cool? Cool.
Pairing: Jake Kim x GN!Reader
Summary: An awkward rendezvous with Big Deal's leader.
Genre/Trope: Friends to enemies to friends to more(?). Non established relationship. Can be viewed as platonic as well.
Warnings: Cussing, self/oc indulgence? (I mostly wrote this for myself), no use of Y/n, MIGHT be OOC Jake (judge them yourself, this my first time writing for Lookism).
A/N: It's been TWO YEARS since I post fanfics so I might be lil stiffy, bare with me chat. I DON'T do request btw!
Masterlist
“Man, so what now? We just…went back to stop being allies?” You questioned bluntly.
It's been a few days since the Hunt for Gun event. Everything went back to how it was. Or some would say, for the better. You weren't exactly on any sides of the crew. Scratch that, you were one of the Workers. And to be fair, you sort of still carry that guilt. Like Samuel, you wanted- no, needed money. Again, scratch that, you aren't exactly like him, God bless. You just have responsibilities at home that need to be taken care of.
Because first of all, being a broke college student got you into this shit and you practically worked your ass for it. You just wanted to pay for your student loans, bills and groceries. Second of all, news flash, Korea ain't as great as influencers described them to be. When you first moved here, you were still expecting the struggles of the norm. Not fighting gangsters. Let alone joining one.
Thirdly, you know basic martial arts. You know what, fuck that. You're actually pretty decent at it. Sparring and training with these dudes around you, paid off. And through the journey you gained friendship, learning to understand different types of people. That includes multiple reality checks, unlocking new traumas as the list goes on. Part of you have thought of the alternatives and the what ifs. While the other half is actually grateful.
“It never has to be that way, you know?” Daniel replied, offering a soft smile.
You wanted to ask if the whole fighting and scheming thing is over, now that Charles Choi is gone. So is the matter of the Red Note. But you keep those questions to yourself, knowing it's far from done when Gun is still alive even if he's in juvie. Besides, he's not the only bad guy they need to watch out for.
You shrugged sheepishly, hands shoving into your pockets. “Right.” Your head turned to the ground for a bit. Daniel senses this and continues, “We're still friends, right?”
You looked up relieved by his words, “Of course. You're cool. You too, Jay.” You added. The blond gave you a big sincere smile as you bent down to pet the puppies. They equally ushered closer for attention. Your expression softened before exhaling.
“Hey.” You started, taking a second to collect your words. “You think Big Deal would diss the hell out of me if I go in their turf? I need to talk to Jake.”
Daniel shrugged back, giving his usual reassuring energy. “I don't think so, after everything. You want us to accompany you there?” You shake your head, mimicking his smile, “I'm good. Thanks though.”
It was by then you found yourself stepping in Big Deal’s street. You weren't a coward, but you still hold respect for each of Four Major Crews. If you are being honest, you didn't even belong here. You're just a person who was caught up with your own personal issues and was left with no options but to use physical violence for your own selfish gain. It wasn't selfish, you told yourself. You just have your own goal and achievement like everyone else.
You were immediately recognised and being semi interrogated by the other Big Deal members due to your sudden and random arrival. You kept your tone as calm as possible. Getting straight to the business and voila! There's Jake.
You muttered a thanks to Jerry before turning to your old friend. Ice breaking sucked, this everyone can relate. But man, you acted like an ex begging to get together with him again. “Sooo……”
You trailed awkwardly, eyes darting everywhere in the room except him. “Big Deal's boss doing paperworks, huh? Guess nobody escaping that.” You tried to humour him, to light up the mood, anything. And luckily, he stifled a chuckle. Or a subtle exhale, you counted it as that either way.
“Yeah, well, it's my responsibility now.” Jake replied, shifting in his chair while leaning back.
To put it simply, you and Jake aren't completely strangers. You two were somewhat colleagues, let's put it that way. You never dare ask about the friendship part. Are you two even friends? Buddies? Amigos?
I mean you're very much aware of Big Deal's history. Jake isn't so secretive, mind you. You've privately met Sinu himself before, good man. You're most definitely familiar with Samuel. And by God, you weren't very fond of him. But you didn't judge him either, and as mentioned, everyone here has a personal goal. You've managed to exchange conversation with him from time to time. If I may say so myself, a LOT. Boy, was he an interesting character.
When you first joined Workers, you were clueless. Eugene offered you good deals. Obviously you hesitated in the begining. You were no fool, you knew what you signed up for. Fortunately for you, you weren't involved too much. You did side jobs, mostly undercover. When Jake finds out, he confronts you. Which actually surprised you. You fought him. You fought everyone else while sticking to the white uniform. Although he can definitely tell you held back at that moment.
“No hard feelings, Jake.” You said back then before getting into stance. You took his hit many times, hardly using your full strength before discovering you were just buying him time to let others finish their business. And he didn't blame you either. He felt bad. Guilty even, that he couldn't offer you better hospitality, better support. And yes, he admits that he was kinda cold back then. He never gets the chance to apologize. But he does now as you basically presence yourself to him.
“You aight? You know, after all the…” You trailed, subtly recalling the recent fiasco. He blinked before nodding, “Just peachy. You?” You nodded back. “Yeah.”
As if it couldn't get any awkward, you were starting to regret showing your face here. On top of that, he wasn't any near being his suave self. He had it fine with the others but with you? There's an unfinished business. He thought it's odd. It's exactly the same scenario that happened between him and Samuel, yet the tension wasn't supposed to be this palpable as far as he know.
“I'm sorry-” You both said in sync, now looking at each other weirdly. Chuckling nervously, you both did it again, “You first. No, you. Not me, you. Fuck.”
Sighing, you both let out small genuine laughters. “No, seriously. You first.” he offered.
You nodded, “No hard feelings, right?”
He smiled, “No hard feelings. It's good to see you again.” You returned the smile, the burden finally left your shoulders. “Same here. You didn't break a bone. I'm not surprised.”
He leaned forward, folding his arms on the desk. His arms bulging through the fabric doesn't go unnoticed. “Well, colour me surprised. You didn't either.” He joked back. His mood has lifted as did yours. You rolled your shoulders, pretending to flex slightly. “I tried.”
“Say,” Your expression turned slightly serious, still with a bit of amusement in your tone. “I guess I owe you a jack of explanation, huh?”
He tilted his head, “Oh? Do you, now? Lemme check.” He pretended to go through his paperworks. You just chuckled, shaking your head at his sense of humour. “Asshole. I'm serious.”
Jake faced you again, “I know. And I'm listening. We can get food while we're at it.”
“Let me guess, my treat?” You raised a brow.
He gets off from his seat, his duty now left abandoned. “C’mon, I'm not a monster.” Slinging his arm around your shoulder as he leads you to the exit.
#lookism x reader#lookism jake kim#jake kim#kim gimyung#lookism kim gimyung#lookism#lookism fic#lookism manhwa#manhwa#x reader#fanfic#dood writes!#lookism imagines#lookism imagine#lookism samuel#self ship#self insert#self indulgent#lookism x you#x you#x y/n#x yn#imagines#imagine#fic#my writing
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Does Ghost have a wife?
Look, I really don't care about shipps, ship whatever you want, be it canon x canon or oc x canon, I'm just here to explain some misinformation that is being used to attack ghost x soap and some ocs.
First of all, it's important to understand that these women they call Ghost's wives came from the comics, even though Ghost's comic is iconic, they were never considered canon by the writers, just fanservice.
Now about this Ghost comic, due to a translation error and misinterpretation, some people say that Ghost's sister-in-law is his wife. I don't think he would be so bad as to flirt with his own brother's wife, especially since he did everything he could to make his brother quit drugs and have a happy family.
(I couldn't find pictures of her, but her name is Beth Riley.)
The second character is Mara, both are just friends and this is clear in several moments.
“But Ghost was sad when she got hurt.” Yes, that’s something he would feel for anyone he considers a close friend. Honestly, calling Mara Ghost’s wife sounds like that “opposite-sex friends don’t exist” nonsense and it even diminishes her to just his wife, not the soldier she is.
(Mara in mw1 reboot and her in warzone comics.)
Now the last one is Urban Tracker, she was supposed to be the cute poster girl who would attract more audience like Seraphine in lol or dva in overwatch, but that didn’t work and she ended up being discarded. She started being called Ghost’s wife because of a photo of her being carried by him, but in fact that’s a montage because in the original photo it’s another soldier.
In reality the explanation for this is quite simple, Ghost is a famous character, so why not use him to give fame to the copy of Seraphine? But the truth is that they never had any kind of relationship and she was completely erased when she was discarded, so canonically Ghost doesn’t even know/remember who she is.
“But there are some of their art pieces that were posted on the official cod Twitter profile and some people who work with cod liked their fanarts.”
In fact, those pieces were reposts of fanarts, just another attempt by them to make her famous. In fact, if we take the fanart likes into account, then logically Ghost x Jade (Sleepypotato OC) and Ghost x Soap would be canons.
(Her default skin)
I didn't come here to fight over ships or anything like that, I created this account to talk about lore, ask questions and debunk misinformation about cod. Now, if you fight over ships or attack people for that reason, find something to do, getting off the internet sometimes is good.
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my thoughts on "failing" to manifest
The reason why yall ‘fail’ to manifest what you want (the real case is that you believed you have failed even though you didn’t) is because you use the 3D as proof that your desire is here or not. I don’t know how many times the loa community has to say it, THE 3D IS NOT THE PROOF, YOUR MIND/IMAGINATION IS. You are the proof, whatever thoughts you persist in are the proof. It’s not rocket science!
The minute you decide you have something, it's yours. You don’t need to look out in the 3D for it, look in your imagination, reassure yourself! Manifestation will always be instantaneous, there is always movement happening in the 3D, yall just have insane trust issues with yourself.
You can’t exactly fail manifestation, you just persist in thoughts that contradict your desire, in the end that's what you get and that's what will be shown in the 3D. Yes your life can change in a second, Yes good things can happen to you, No, you can’t fail???? I don’t understand when yall say “I'm gonna start over on manifesting”, you manifest all the time, consciously and subconsciously, you will always manifest no matter what you say lolololol.
All I’m going to say is realize that the 4D is really what you need to focus on, your thoughts and what you persist in. That’s it. There isn't some magical technique or secret power to manifest, just think, think, think. Change your thoughts on EVERYTHING. You have bad grades? Sike, no you don't, your grades are amazing. Your SP said they don’t like you? Haha, actually they're in love with you, just shy. And if you need “proof” or whatever, find reassurance in your thoughts, not on your physical reality.
I hope this helpsss,
xoxo cyra
#loa blog#loablr#loa tumblr#loa success#master manifestor#loassumption#loa#manifesting#manifesation#shiftblr#reality shifting#neville goddard
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Hi are you up for a messy scene analysis thing
Ofc it's this scene who do you think I am
I've been wanting to do this for God knows how long but I never had the balls and neither the words to (still don't) but I wanna try to properly talk about this scene. My primal instinct is to sit here and tell you how much this 30 second scene changed the trajectory of these characters in the next movies, how it made their friendship grow and develop and how much of a storytelling lesson it is (oh the so so deep understanding you need to have of your characters to have them say things so vaguely and still express exactly what they mean). I could also go down the emotional and subjective road and ramble about how much it means to me and how I resonate with it, but I've done that at least 837382 times and I think everyone knows it by now 😭 so!!! Let's get to the real thing
(I'm trying to keep it as analytical and straightforward as possible but please note that this is my favorite scene that's ever existed so neutrality is not really a possibility)
Rocket is a brat. He's restless, he's loud, he's always puffing up his chest and yelling at someone and picking fights with the wind cuz it was blowing in a way he didn't like and he's just an overall bastard. In this scene, though, we see him inside out. His head is low, his shoulders are slumped, he has his tail between his knees and he looks tired. He speaks quietly (curiously like he doesn't want anybody else to hear him), he's not deliberately insulting anyone and he's just..... defeated??
Up until that point I don't think we ever got to see Rocket like that. From what the movies have shown us he'd never had to. But in the past few days that led to this, Rocket had stolen batteries for no apparent reason (which we'll later learn why💀), ruined their ship, got literally kidnapped by Ravagers, blew up a creepy planet-guy-thing and oh my god attended his friend's dad's funeral. At least half of these things were directly or indirectly his fault and he knows it.
I don't think he ever doubted it was (we see it earlier in the movie when the Guardians leave to "The Chain" by Fleetwood Mac and Rocket scowls and winces like he either stepped in a pile of shit or got hit in the face by regret), but he still argued with Peter even knowing he was in the wrong just to keep up apparences or hold on to a little thread of pride when he was already feeling ashamed for being caught red-handed stealing shit he didn't need AND destroying their ship etc etc, and he just kinda fucked up big time. And I think that's (besides the general exhaustion of parenting a tree and fighting a planet and Yondu's death) is what got him so devastated in that scene.
Ofc Yondu played an extremely important role in that. He was the one to open Rocket's eyes, to give him some sort of reality check and show him the only thing isolation is ever gonna bring him is regret and bitterness (or, in other words, Yondu). Rocket is most of all hopeless and tired and just sad like that because he knows he hurt his friends. He knows he's chasing them away, that he yells at them, that he's always mean and that he steals batteries he doesn't need. He knows he's not awesome to put up with and seeing what happened to Yondu and his former friends probably made him terrified it'd happen to him and the Guardians too. He's stuck in this cycle of pushing them away with everything he can (and we could get into all his trauma regarding betrayal and death and literally endless other things but it's all very clear at this point) and he knows patience doesn't last forever. He's just scared, he feels bad and he's tired.
Now on the other hand we have Quill. He's also destroyed, he lost two fathers (3 if you count what Ego could've been, what he wanted him to be), basically relived his mother's death and had to watch literally every single one of them die. He's also scared and tired, yes, but all he has left is this unstable family of weird idiots who are learning how to show care and he's... pretty much fine with it. He wants it.
And when what Rocket's saying clicks, when he realizes who he's talking about, Quill, who's usually all smirks and teasing and bickering and name-calling, looks at his best friend like this,
because
(From vol 2 script!! Won't even try to comment on that last part before Quill's last line but I also really like that Peter just "shakes his head" over and over like he's just barely listening until he realizes what Rocket really means cuz it also shows a lot about his character. He's naturally a little slow and downright stupid when it comes to this kind of hidden emotional thing and he's also exhausted and depressed from everything that happened and STILL he stops and just. Sees Rocket, and sees Yondu.)
He's not doing well. He's probably sore and hurt and sad and miserable and yet he takes his sweet time to look down at Rocket, let go of his resentment from before and see right through him. In order to understand this scene it's important to remember he most likely doesn't know what Yondu told Rocket at all, he doesn't know anything they said to each other and how Yondu showed him they're mirrors. He doesn't know any of that. He just knows his best friend and his father and how much they resemble each other. He puts up with Rocket's bullshit because he knows how to deal with Yondu.
He could've just ignored him or pretended he didn't know what he was talking about. He could've made Rocket swallow his pride and "teach him a lesson" by making him say what he means without hiding behind metaphors and vague self-deprecation, because Rocket was probably vulnerable and defeated enough to be honest in that moment. And yet, he just looks at his friend, who's usually a loud and mean and restless brat, and is now staring at the floor with his ears droopy and his tail between his knees, and just says, as a form of reassurance and tenderness that's just as subtle and shy as Rocket's insecurities, "Well, of course not."
(The kind and soft and sweet DETERMINATION on his face tho like no!!! No we're not ditching you even though you suck I'm!!! Serious!!!!)
#this is#this is about a 28 second scene#and it has eight p EIGHT PAGES???!!!!???#people dont say “i like this thing” anymore no they write 8 page essays abt it#also i love Quill's not just like “oh nah man”#its a full on OF COURSE not. like undoubtedly and unquestionably youre NOT chasing us away and we dont hate you#normal behavior of a normal person (who is me because i am very normal)#gotg#rocket raccoon#peter quill#yondu udonta#guardians of the galaxy#rocky and pete#BATTERIES!!!
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As much as she knew Emil knew her, sometimes better than she knew herself, she also knew him better than she knew the back of her own hand. Having been friends since they were teens and going through so much by each other's sides, there wasn't one look on his face she couldn't decipher at this point. "Gotcha." Smirking a little, Kira could only raise her eyebrows a little. "She's a special circumstance and I don't even know her name? Damn honey, is someone down bad?" Smirking again as he suddenly became very busy making their dinner, she was so tempted to dial Gen into the conversation.
Her face softened as he continued and she could hear it in his voice. "Okay fine, I will drop this for now because I love you, but if you keep going on with this whole, the reality is that she doesn't like you thing, I am going to go buy a fish and smack you around the head with it." Leaning up, she pressed a kiss against the side of his head before moving over to the other side of his kitchen to grab a bowl for the salad. "She's a damn lucky girl to even have you think about this and I won't hear any different."
Rolling her eyes a little as she started chopping some lettuce, Kira didn't divulge all the other things she'd rather in the name of revenge for her best friend. "On the contrary, I could do a lot worse and it be justified, so egging her house could be seen as nice in that instance." Smirking a little, Kira shrugged as she tossed the lettuce into a bowl before ripping off a few more leaves. "It's happening, don't fight it. She's banned."
Nodding, it was an emotion Kira understood far too well. Seeing the person who left you was never easy, but she hated that this was another thing Emil now had to deal with, when he had enough on his plate. "I mean, of course, you had no real closure to that relationship and I imagine you've got a ton of questions." Popping one tiny piece of lettuce into her mouth, Kira tossed the rest into the bowl before setting the pack to the side. "Do you think she'd answer the questions you have? Do you even want to ask them?" Reaching for another ingredient on the counter, Kira looked over at Emil. "It gets easier, we both know that. I just don't like that it's stirred everything up for you again, you know? Do you think you need closure from her or is it something else?"
"That..." his brows knitted close together, "We don't..." Kira had got him good and he knew it. Fumbling over a few stammered helpless words. "That... might not... be true..." Emil tried to argue, but defeat settled in quickly. "Fine! I would be telling you that, but you don't..." his nose crinkled. Flustered a bit of heart crawled up his neck. "She's a special circumstance ok." He huffed and turned away from her, busying himself about the kitchen to try and dodge just how rattled he was. Despite his own rocky love life. His ex-wife, being ghosted by one of his former friends and girlfriend, and plenty of other mishaps of dating along the way Emil was not usually particularly timid with women. Yet Kira, standing there and asking him about the worst-case scenario, was really messing with him. "I... fine, okay. Yes it's early, and everything would be fine if things don't work out but... it's been a while since I've had a crush like this. We're not talkin' meeting a cute girl at the bar and asking her out. That I can do. This? The whole dumb... I'd just kinda like to give myself a little longer in the 'what if' before a healthy dose of reality settles in." He was in trouble. Emil listened to Kira as he washed and prepped the cherry tomatoes. "Egging her house isn't nice, I think you know that." Emil snorted. Though, humor faded to a pit in his stomach pretty swiftly. Swallowing hard at the mental picture of Alara. "I'm..." speechless, again, but for an entirely different reason. A raspy bemused laugh snuck through at Kira's threat of banning the woman from the ice cream parlor. "Kira!" He laughed, affectionately rolling his eyes. A sigh followed, and Emil rolled his shoulders to relieve some tension from his frame. "It sucked." Seeing Alara well and truly amplified his trepidation with Lia. A cold hard reminder that even one of his closest friends had let him down. If she could leave him the way she did, like he was nothing... surely that was a reflection on him in some way. Two of his only real relationships had been with women he'd known for years and they both decided to leave him. "Seeing her and still... I don't know, feeling something... that's the hard part." Emil had long since gotten past that stage with his ex-wife. He barely recognized her anymore as the young woman with flowing locks who kissed him before his games. But Alara? As much as he wanted to be bitter, he couldn't really muster it.
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I just need to vent...
I'm not looking for sympathy or handouts or anything like that. I just need to get my feelings out somewhere I know my family won't see it because they don't know any of this.
I have a forced judgment on me from a creditor. I have another that is still in the system, but it will probably be decided on soon. My home is in the foreclosure process. My homeowner's insurance dropped me 2 months ago, so I dont have insurance on my house. I don't currently have a job and haven't since December. My boyfriend's job is fucking with his hours, not giving him full time and making him work hours he didn't agree to while also paying him basically nothing. They treat him like garbage while expecting him to carry the store, even though he's not management. They claim his work isn't up to par while allowing others to get away with literally sitting on their ass doing absolutely nothing. Oh, and they get full time hours.
The tiny shred of hope we have is that I have a lead on a possible job, but I have no clue when I could start or if it's even guaranteed. My boyfriend has a lead on a possible new job, but again, no clue when that could start or if it's even going to happen.
If I can atleast get a job, then I have hope through bankruptcy to save my house and clear these creditors. But I have to have a job first.
I'm so tired of being poor. I'm so tired of worrying about money every second of the day. I'm so tired of not knowing if I'll have a roof over my head tomorrow. I'm so tired of wondering when I'll get that knock on the door or letter in the mail telling me my home isn't mine anymore. I'm so tired of shitty capitalist corporations and this fucking country. I'm so tired of fighting a corrupt system that doesn't care about anyone who isn't the 1%. I'm so tired of life.
Part of me really just wants everything to end. My life insurance would atleast pay off the house and possibly my other debts as well, or atleast a good portion of them. But we all know life insurance won't pay out for self deleters. So, all I can do is hope that something unalives me, or hope a miracle happens before it's too late. Neither seem probable.
So here I am, trying not to completely break down under the weight of all this stress and it feels impossible. I feel myself cracking more and more each day. I feel the weight get heavier. I feel my mind slipping more and more into those dark places, wondering if it truly would be best for everyone if I just wasn't around anymore.
I don't have anyone. My family can't be trusted with this information. I've lost every single person I considered my friend. The only person I have is my boyfriend, but I don't know if he even still wants me. That's a separate issue, though.
I'm truly just a useless piece of garbage doing nothing but wasting space and resources that someone else could be using. Literally everyone in my life would be better off if I wasn't around anymore. Most of them wouldn't even notice I was gone. Even if they did, it would barely register as a blip to them. Honestly, they would probably think I was inconveniencing them even in death because they would have to deal with my body and property.
I'm worthless scum. Period. I truly wish something would just put me out of my misery because I'm not capable of doing it myself.
Seriously, don't bother trying to act like you care. I know none of you do. 99.99% of you didn't even read this post and the ones who did don't give a flying fuck. That's reality.
#something just take me out#I know no one cares#I don't want sympathy#I don't want fake cries of worry#I don't want anyone claiming they give a shit about me#I know it's not true#I know I'm better off 💀#Not a single one of you would ACTUALLY care#Yea you claim to#You tell people not to unalive themselves because you care#But in reality you just don't want to look bad#In reality you just don't want to deal with the aftermath#It's an inconvenience to your busy life#So don't even bother#Be who you truly are and don't even pretend to care because we both know you don't#No one cares about anyone but themselves and sometimes their immediate family#But even that's a stretch for most people
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testing out drawing maormer 🪸🐚🪸 and a nelvas 🧣📜🩷 i'll ramble about maormer a bit in the tags
#tes#skyrim#my art#do you like my nelvas emojis🧣📜🧣📜 get it? scarf🤗 and scroll🤗 Everything hurts sofucking bad#anyways i talked about them wif my friend quite a bit i basically 'agree' w/ everything that is written about them && their biology in -#- canon; except tes is very much all Talk and no good actual visual presentation of what it's talking about#cus all of the maormer look like garboooo likeee what am i looking @#but since this is just a first test i think i'll keep playing around with their looks later; they are most close to altmer obvi in the -#- sense of how 'mutated' they r. however maormer are more gross looking for the typical human#they do have flat faces and alldat in canon already but i want them to just have nostrils and no real nose bridge#and they have no lips😝 they also have very visible gums. && have anglerfish teeth#what would be fur on other mer is just scales on them and is placed is scattered in the same places#i was thinking of making swimming most comfortable for them so i gave them more fins#they'd have them on arms and legs and the hair on the tail for them is just a big fin🐠#as for hair i'm thinking of them having none of it at all bcos it looks sooooo ugly on them it's very unnerving to see hair on fish#either no hair at all or something with a different texture. like slimy silky thin seaweed#or the hair that m*necraft striders have LMAO#webbed fingers is cuuuute they'd have webbed armpits like they're those flying rodents🐿 lol#i'd place their gills on both the neck and their ribs#whenever they wear clothes they tie their arm and leg fins up ; i think from birth they just stay in water until they hit puberty and -#- r able to actually walk around#another cute fact is that males and females wud look literally the same almost (women are flat chested too)#fish fish fish#maybe i'll rethink some stuff. i still wanna draw fish babies#but in reality i think even the mere existence of maormer is very pointless bc they don't really matter at all do they#tes lore is soooo overstuffed that's why i don't know anything about it my time is so valuable to meLMFAOAOOO#saw a typo in this sorry i'm just chill like that
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sees a post that's like "LOOK, LOOK AT ME I HAVE TERRIBLE MEDIA LITERACY LOOOOK AHAHA ISN'T THAT FUNNY"
Checks bio
"I'm 21"
Ah, yes. You're in the age group to have been hit by the resurgence of purity culture. I'm so sorry.
#nuance is lost on them#9 times out of 10 it's this#I'm so crushed that a whole generation of queer younglings got poisoned#all you have to do is be mature enough to look at a piece of media and say “this isn't my jam”#and not be like IT'S BAD B/C THIS IS PRoBlEmATIC REP or whatevs#maybe something didn't speak to you#but it's okay#if the non queer crowd can have garbage reality TV and shitty dramas#we can have garbage too#just don't watch it if you don't like it#There are a few things out there right now that I can look at and say“eh”#I see what it's doing and that's great for it#but it's not up my alley#and I move on and create what I want to see out there#my tags are longer than my post LOL#to be clear this is not scorn#this is genuine disappointment and sadness
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you know what, I actually will talk about this because it's bothering me. The issue with focussing so heavily on syd and carmy's potential for a romantic relationship isn't that there's something inherently unintellectual about romance or whatever, it's that a lot of people seem incapable of doing that without immediately flattening the story and ignoring or intentionally misreading any and all nuance for the sake of that romance. Every scene suddenly becomes about how it impacts their relationship, every analysis is done through a romantic lens, every frame or line of dialogue becomes about finding some easter egg or hint that "proves" these people should start dating. Their dynamic is absolutely a fundamental part of this show, but if you can only see it as a will-they-won't-they, you miss so much of what the story is actually trying to say with these two.
There are good versions of this story where their relationship is romantic and there are good versions of this story where it isn't, but as soon as you decide them being together is "the point," you lose the ability to actually judge the story for what it is, not what you want it to be.
#like so much of their dynamic (esp but not exclusively in S3) has been about showing the ways that carmy's trauma and dysfunctional#attitude in the kitchen impacts other people and how even though he cares about syd and wants their partnership to work he keeps self#sabotaging and setting himself and by extension her and the restaurant up to fail and replicating the same toxic environments that#he grew up and trained in and this is very much consistent with his character and a natural continuation of the conflicts they've been#having since S1 but because him being shitty with her runs contrary to them getting together suddenly its 'ruining the story' and#out of character and only happening bc the writers just hate to see this ship winning and like. if you really think that i genuinely don't#know what show you've been watching bc it sure as shit wasn't this one. like it hurts to see him do this because you know#they could do something genuinely great together and that he's ruining a really good thing but this is also the reality of where he is rn#if he was just a good and supporting business partner and not deeply dysfunctional it would be wildly out of character#the problem w S3 wasn't that it 'ruined' their relationship it's that it had no clear focus overemphasized carmy's arc at the expense#of the other leads deprioritized the supporting cast while failing to give them their own arcs gave more screen time to#unecessary and uninteresting new 'comic relief' characters and let conflicts stagnate without resolving them or#letting them evolve over the course of the season.#this isn't exclusive to the bear this is a general trend ive noticed where as soon as the 'shipper' part of people's brains get activated#it's like they lose the ability to read the story any other way and it stops being about what's good for the narrative and starts being#about whether or not these two people kiss and anything that gets in the way of that is bad and anything that brings it closer is good#and it's usually whatever but it's really frustrating when the story ppl are doing that to is this good#it also makes people fundamentally incapable of treating any 'obstacle' to that romance in a way that isn't wildly meanspirited and#gross (esp bc those characters are usually women) which is exhausting. like no claire isn't evil or a 'pick me' or 'bad' for carmy#or a useless addition to the story or whatever other nonsense you guys have decided must be true to feel okay. she's a perfectly normal#character and their relationship is exploring some of the ways that carmy's inability to deal with or actually address his trauma#impacts the various relationships in his life. she doesn't even have to be a monster or a narrative mistake for him and syd to be#'destined' for each other or whatever. this isn't a middle school wattpad fic.#im definitely gonna get killed in the street for this but ive been looking for a good reason to spend less time on here so might as well#the bear#sydcarmy#sydney adamu#carmy berzatto
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