#But imma be honest did not want to have that association here for reasons so... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

piqued-curiosity · 2 years ago

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“i do sincerely agree that bisexuals and lesbians should simply not interact beyond calling out bigotry tbh. imma call out lesbophobia when i see it but i have no wish to go have community with some of the deranged people i see here and i’m sure it’s likewise cause all it does is build even more resentment”

To be honest I’m the same, and it’s because of a combination of real-life experiences and online ones. I understand there’s a lot of sympathy for lesbians who “have bad experiences with bi women”, but in MY experience, at least a good chunk of the time, the “bad experience” is that the bi woman dated a man at some point after they broke up, or acknowledged that she was attracted to men and the lesbian was disgusted.

I was in a serious relationship with a woman, and she broke up with me after a year and a half. It was amicable and I was upset but nobody was in the wrong. 6 months after we broke up I started dating a man and she told all our mutual friends that I had “gone crawling back to cock” and must have only been treating her as a bit of fun etc even though SHE BROKE UP WITH ME! I was open about being bi before we started dating so it wasn’t a shock to her, but for some reason she thought it was her business and I had “betrayed” her in some way by dating a man??

Like, they are aware we are bi, they know what the definition of bi is, and then are upset when we aren’t the same as a lesbian and are actually attracted to a man? I had another relationship where the lesbian wanted an open relationship after 4 months and I didn’t. One of the terms of the “open relationship” would’ve been that I couldn’t date a man, only women. I didn’t want an open relationship ANYWAY but I thought this was insane. Like the “open relationship” is basically that she gets what she wants but I can’t do any icky thing that would turn HER off. She was flabbergasted then when I broke up with her instead of going along with it, and I was the bad guy then of course.

It’s like some lesbians are offended and disgusted by the concept of bisexuality, but want to date us anyway? Just like straight people pretty much. But then there’s the added bonus that the lesbians feel entitled to tell us to shut the fuck up about our experiences and basically pretend we are lesbian to appease them, but at the same time want to us acknowledge that we are different from them and stop riding on their coattails or whatever. Like “how dare you act like your experiences are in anyway similar to mine, acknowledge that you are different!!” And then want us to functionally be lesbians???

And when we say we’ve been assaulted by men etc it’s “well that’s your fault for associating with men in the first place” victim blaming bullshit. Female solidarity my ass.

For this reason I only date other bi women now, and while I recognise that there of course ARE situations where bi women treated lesbians badly, I’m very very suspicious whenever I see a lesbian saying she had a “bad experience” with a bi woman. I’m like “did you? Or are you just not ok with her innate sexuality?”

It’s funny though cause I don’t usually admit that I feel this way on radblr cause I get metric tonnes of shit from lesbians saying I’m calling them abusers or whatever. I’m a big lesbophobe if I say I have bad experiences with lesbians. But when lesbians say actual heinous shit about bi women they get sympathy because “I’m sure an evil bi woman did something to her to warrant her saying that bi women are all asking to be raped :(“

I’m sorry that you had those experiences, you were treated unfairly.

But I don’t know why you’re so shocked about the attitude these lesbians have towards opposite sex attraction when it’s something we voice constantly.

Lesbians often talk about how awful it feels when we date a woman and after breaking up she dates a man. Even if it’s just part of what bisexuality is, lesbians have been raised in a homophobic society which tells us to view ourselves and our sexuality as lesser. A lot of people feel badly when they see who their ex is with, maybe they’re with somebody taller than you, prettier than you, etc. A lot of people feel insecure when they see who their ex is with. Lesbians are human too so we feel those normal emotions, and for us an ex’s partner being a man is just one of those traits that fuels insecurity. Just as a woman might feel insecure seeing her ex date a taller woman because that’s something she can never be, a lesbian might feel the same about seeing her ex dating a man. Except now add a bunch of internalised homophobia.

If you think that’s irrational that’s fine, plenty of bi women have voiced that because they simply don’t understand the lesbian experience and that’s fine. Your ex acted really shitty with the whole “crawling back to cock” thing, and I’m not excusing that. You just seem baffled by how she could possibly feel the emotions she felt so I’m explaining.

And that condition of an open relationship makes perfect sense to me. Men easily transmit STDs, of course a lesbian doesn’t want to have to worry about opening herself up to that risk. I mean, the solution would obviously be to not have an open relationship… but I can see where she’s coming from.

Plenty of lesbians are honest about all of the above and say that’s why they don’t date bi women, but then they get called biphobic. So yeah we do get caught in a weird spot, similar to the one TRAs have us in, where we don’t want to date within a group of people, and are called hateful bigots for it. So a lot of us don’t want to date you, we’re just pressured into it.

What you’re explaining is exactly why I support lesbians who don’t date bi women, because it’s an unfair situation all around. Bi women shouldn’t be in relationships where they have to suppress a part of their sexuality, and lesbians shouldn’t be in relationships where they have to be around OSA if it makes them uncomfortable.

#I’m sorry that you had those experiences but a lot of this ask just can be summed up with ‘I don’t understand lesbians’#asks #anon

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themoontaxi · 3 years ago

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hellooo, i must say this is one fine café establishment you have here :) i’m feeling very hungry today but i usually like to portion my daily carb intake, so we’re gonna start off with some counter treats first and then work our way up if that’s cool with you! (i tip very well)

may i plz start off with a cupcake, as well as a fortune cookie and bubble tea (hold the boba)

🥠 - nothing in my head by richie quake

🧋 - twenty one pilots (it’s not that i don’t like them, i just don’t really listen to them anymore for a couple of reasons)

hellooo back at you harley. stop it, you’re making me blush 🥰 hate to tell you, but i think i kinda interfered with your plans of portioning your carbs…

first off, sorry for the hold up - even the counter had quite the queue. you’re getting an extra large cupcake in compensation (and bc i was unable to decide on only 3 🙃)

but first regarding your 🥠: i absolutely adored this song! it immediately went into my vibing in orbit playlist. i could very much relate to the feeling of sitting alone in the dark, head empty and wondering what to do with oneself…

so, a little bird may or may not have told me that you were a bit unsure if you even hit the send button (i swear it was like telepathy, i was just asking her what kinda music you like) - so here’s your confirmation that you did 😌 and through said little bird’s spotify i may or may not have also found your profile and scrolled a bit through your playlists. after coming to the conclusion that you not only have formidable taste, but are open to all kinds of genres as well, i opened my (absolute) favorites and selected the ones that reminded me of your posts, blog aesthetic, vibe, or the few things i know about you thanks to birdy. ‘course i had to take some chances with them, but i’m hoping nevertheless that you find some that you enjoy. i also noticed that we share a love for a lot of artists, so i tried to refrain myself from putting heaps of those here. and bc it’s kinda a wild mix, i put the songs in an order that hopefully won’t give you whiplash. alright, imma shut up now and let you indulge in your 🧁

as for the 🧋: yess, something i can talk about! i seriously couldn’t agree more. i too was a huge fan once - went to one of their concerts (it was great!) and even wrote a term paper on analyzing conceptual metaphors in their lyrics. that was like two years ago now. after that i kinda just stopped listening and can’t even really say why. but anyway, here are some reasons why you may have stopped listening as well:

- their last album was underwhelming, let’s be honest. i listened to it once when it came out and never came back to it. not that it was particularly bad, just not even close to as captivating as their previous stuff. and with saturday i was questioning if i was still listening to the same band - no idea why that song even exists.

- too high expectations. vessel especially for me was such a masterpiece, that i seriously doubt anything they put out in the future can top that.

- you don’t have to believe the hype when there’s none. their last album was barely talked about or played on the radio (as far as i know), so it was a case of ‘out of sight, out of mind’.

- their ‘better late than never’ response to blm. if i remember correctly, tyler tweeted sth about being free to decide on what social issues he wants to comment on, and when he’d rather not say anything (which i honestly don’t fault him for). and he did so in cracking some joke that i can’t remember anymore. but anyway, a lot of people were upset about it and begged him to delete the tweet or at least give a statement now, but that took him such a long time, that there were a lot of fans in the comments expressing their disappointment and saying they’d written them off.

- growing out of it. you listened to them a lot in another chapter of your life, and are trying to move onto the next one. you changed and don’t want to fall into old patterns you might associate with sth that belongs to the past.

alrighty, hope you like the playlist. if yes, you can leave that generous tip you mentioned here <3

#lovely people with exquisite music taste <3 #thanks for your order <3 #now imma go to sleep it’s 4 am again -#fortune cookie 🥠#compliment cupcake 🧁#hate to burst your bubble tea 🧋#café lounge #music

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littlespoonevan · 5 years ago

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Hey, since you're taking prompts and are one of my favorite gallavich writers, I offer this humble, poorly worded prompt: I'm convinced that they had their second kiss on the couch during the sleepover and that it's A LOT for both Ian and Mickey emotionally and just really that whole evening that we didn't get to see of them finally kissing, like really kissing, and just... the emotions, you know? Thrilling and scary and revelatory and joyful and finally and new???

hopefully this fulfills all your exciting-second-kiss-first-sleepover needs!!! let’s just imagine this is an alternate universe where this happens and the screen fades to black and nothing else happens for the rest of the episode okay!!!!!!!! i hope you like it

Ian feels nerves bubbling in his stomach forapproximately the ten thousandth time tonight but they’re good kinds of nerves.That fizzy, anticipatory feeling that he always associates with being alonewith Mickey. They’ve finished their pizza rolls and, to be honest, Ian hasn’tbeen paying attention to the movie for at least the past fifteen minutes.

It’s just- he’s alonewith Mickey. They have the house to themselves and the fact that Mickey might’veactually orchestrated it to be that way makes Ian lightheaded. Mickey hadbusted him out of the group home, Mickey had made him dinner, Mickey had kissedhim a couple of days ago and Ian’s been itching to do it again ever since.

He hadn’t pushed what with the whole Mickey gettingshot in the ass thing and then social services fucking everything up;truthfully, he’d barely even had any time alone with Mickey since then. But now…

Ian takes another anxious pull of his beer and castsa sidelong glance at Mickey. He feels like a kid caught with his hand in thecookie jar when he realises Mickey’s already looking at him.

“The fuck’s wrong with you?” Mickey asks, soundingmore amused than surly, and fuck, Ian can’t stop staring at his mouth.

“Did you really just invite me over here to watchmovies?” Ian asks, swallowing around the dryness in his throat when Mickey’sexpression morphs into a smirk.

“Somebody’s eager tonight,” Mickey remarks, twistinga bit to face Ian more, body loose and open and looking so, so inviting. “Sharin’a room with all those guys getting you worked up?”

“Shut the fuck up, that’s not the reason,” Ian huffs.He pauses to watch Mickey, carefully reading his expression for any signs ofhesitance or hostility, but all he sees is a combination of mirth andmischievousness. Mickey’s eyes are glinting in the light and his smile is stillticking up the corners of his mouth and Jesus Christ, Ian can’t take thisanymore.

“You ever gonna kiss me again or do I have to waituntil we’re in another high risk crime situation?” he says finally, wordscoming out in a rush with his breath.

Mickey’s face goes blank with surprise and Ian isterrified he’ll close off but his posture doesn’t change.

“Seriously?” he asks after a beat. He attempts ascoff but Ian isn’t fooled by it. “We could be fucking right now and you’rethinking about kissing?”

“You didn’t answer the question,” Ian says, breathcaught in his throat as he waits for Mickey’s reaction.

Mickey rolls his eyes but it takes a moment for himto do it. “What’s the big fucking deal? It’s not…”

He trails off as Ian shuffles closer, sitting upstraight until his knee is digging into Mickey’s thigh and their faces are onlya few inches apart. He exhales, feels a shiver run up his spine when Mickey’seyes briefly flutter closed in response.

“It’s not what?” Ian whispers, pushing his luck andputting his hand on Mickey’s thigh. His gaze flickers from Mickey’s eyes to hislips and he’s aching to lean in but he won’t do it. Not until he’s made Mickeyrealise he wants it too.

“It’s-“ Mickey starts and stops again, seeming tolose his train of thought as his gaze drops to Ian’s lips.

Ian drifts forward, still not as close as he wants tobe, but his nose bumps Mickey’s and it makes Mickey’s eyes widen just a bit ashe releases the tiniest fucking gasp that goes straight through Ian’s veins.Ian squeezes his thigh, meets Mickey’s eyes one last time, and slots theirmouths together.

All the breath seems to rush out of Mickey at once assoon as they connect. Ian swallows it down and sucks on Mickey’s bottom lip,bringing his free hand up to cup Mickey’s jaw. Mickey takes half a second toreact but then one of his hands his flying up to grip Ian’s bicep and he openshis mouth with a dazed sigh.

Ian can’t help pushing closer, moving into Mickey’sspace as Mickey makes a noise in the back of his throat and uses his hold onIan to pull him on top of him. Mickey lays back until his head hits the armrestand Ian is quick to follow him, leaning up and over him until he can settle hiships in between Mickey’s legs.

Their mouths dislodge in the few seconds to getsituated and Ian is just about to lean back in when Mickey murmurs abreathless, “Fuck, c’mere,” and he curls a hand around the back of Ian’s neckto pull him down.

Ian smiles into the kiss, feels it form into afull-on grin when Mickey huffs against him and mutters, “Stop acting so fuckingsmug,” into his mouth.

Ian pulls back a beat, feels a little thrill whenMickey chases his lips, and uses the hand he has in Mickey’s hair to hold himin place. “You like kissing,” Ian says and he knows he sounds fucking smug buthe can’t help himself.

Mickey attempts to scowl up at him but it doesn’twork when his cheeks are flushed and his lips are shining like that. “You don’tpull your head outta your ass Imma find someone else to kiss.”

Ian arches an eyebrow, flattening himself over Mickeyso they’re chest to chest once again and there’s only a miniscule space betweentheir faces. “Liar,” he whispers, curling his fingers around Mickey’s jaw toopen his mouth and draw him into another kiss.

Mickey shudders against him, fingers flexing againstthe back of Ian’s head as their tongues brush together. It’s a fucking headyfeeling and somehow how feels more intimate and more monumental than anythingelse they’ve ever done before but fuck, Ian wants to bask in this feelingforever.

Their legs tangle together and the couch really istoo small for them to be doing this but Ian doesn’t care, just keeps kissingMickey and attempting to coax those little breathless sounds out of him.

Eventually, the burn in Ian’s lungs becomes too muchso he forces his mouth away from Mickey’s, takes a breath, and moves to trailkisses down Mickey’s neck.

“Jesus fuck, Gallagher,” Mickey breathes beneath him,arching his head back to expose more of his throat and Ian could so fucking getused to this. Ian hums against his throat, hiding his smile a second later whenMickey lets out a sound that was definitely involuntary. His exploration ofMickey’s neck only ends up lasting a minute or so before Mickey tugging on thecollar of his shirt becomes more insistent and he raises his head.

He’s just about to ask what’s wrong when Mickey dragshim into another bruising kiss, leg hitching up to lock around Ian’s hip. Ianpresses him into the couch cushions and deepens the kiss as he rolls his hips.

He’s not sure whose fault it is. But one minute they’reclawing at each other in a desperate attempt to get closer and the next they’rerolling right off the fucking couch. He lands on the floor with a thud, lettingout a painful groan when Mickey lands on top of him and whacks his forehead offIan’s chin.

Mickey raises up on his elbows and they stare at eachother, silent, for a beat before they both burst out laughing. Mickey relaxeshis weight against him, shaking his head and for once not bothering to quellhis laughter.

It makes Ian’s heart squeeze in his chest and hestares up at him, feeling every bit the lovesick teenager he is. Mickey’slaughter peters off after a moment until he’s just left looking down at Ianwith an expression that almost looks peaceful.

“How about we try this on your bed instead?” Iansuggests, trailing one of his hands down Mickey’s back and admittedly, not inmuch of a hurry to move.

“Probably less risk of injury there,” Mickey allows,pushing himself off Ian and standing up.

Ian takes the hand Mickey offers him and haulshimself up, catching Mickey by the waist and reeling him in for another kiss. “That’swhat you think.”

Mickey rears back and raises his eyebrows, thatexcited-amused expression back on his face. “What d’you got in mind?”

Ian grins at him, darts in to steal one last kiss,and starts tugging Mickey in the direction of the bedroom.

“Come on.”

#gallavich #ian x mickey #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #shameless #my fics #asks #Anon

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jacks4eva · 4 years ago

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reaction to the lost hero by rick riordan

imma be honest this is a long time coming, okay so here’s the timeline we’re looking at so you understand me. i read lightning thief in middle school, dropped it and read it again in ninth grade. then i read sea of monsters, but never started titan’s curse. then for some reason in 11th grade i bought the second book in heroes of olympus and started to read it and got confused so i started to read titan’s curse and got to when percy took artemis’s place and then dropped it...again. very sad that time considering it was LEGIT THE END SO CLOSE. anyway yesterday i read the whole thing again and the battle of the labrinyth in like 6-8 hours. idk i can’t remember if i started at 10pm or midnight but i finished at 6am. anyways today i read the last olympian, and now i’m starting the lost hero. i thought it’d be funny to do my reactions.

this timeline is just funny because i have read so many books, and yet the most popular ones like percy jackson and harry potter, didn’t wanna finish lol. i still haven’t finished goblet of fire yet i read 100 pages an hour and could probably finish it in a day. anyways.

let the reactions begin

okay i’ve heard of jason but i was not expecting a pov already

woah electrocution

he’s already got a love interest what

he said the coach is 5’0 i now imagine the coach as danny devito i have no choice

piper and leo yes i recognize these names

(i’ve seen a lot of posts about percy jackson okay)

i like leo i don’t like dylan

i love the starwars reference

oh look guys we got popular girls that are racist, can they get their asses beat in this pls

dylan is also racist for smiling-asswipe

we love the cherokee representation

i hate them so much can they please leave

“i had to say something” i like coach hedge is this bad

i hope percy is the storm but i just know i wouldn’t be that lucky

ofc dylan is a racist monster

danny devito never returned :(

PLS TELL ME THESE REINFORCEMENTS ARE PERCY AND ANNABETH

who is the bulky dude

i’m sorry i’m laughing he’s a big scary dude with his head shaved and A RAINBOW TATTOO and his name is butch

oh so that’s why percy isn’t here

okay usually when reading i can form some kind of theory or connection but at this point i literally have no clue what is happening

i just knew as soon as he asked that he had abilities with fire but i was not expecting fire fingers

wow what a first impression “you should be dead”

wait so all i remember from the son of neptune was the beginning had percy alone i think and i’m not sure if he had his memory or maybe not and he was running away from monsters, so is what’s happening to jason similar to that? and WILL PERCY NOT BE FOUND IN THIS BOOK?

“That also was necessary. Long ago, your father gave me your life as a gift to placate my anger. He named you Jason, after my favorite mortal. You belong to me.

“Whoa,” Jason said. “I don’t belong to anyone.”

Now is the time to pay your debt, she said. Find my prison. Free me, or their king will rise from the earth, and I will be destroyed. You will never retrieve your memory.”

... okay theories, um a goat skin cloak was mentioned to have been owned by Zeus’s foster mother and that he owned it so the woman could either be the foster mother or Hera. If it was Hera, it would make sense that Zeus gave his son to placate her anger at his cheating or whatever. They are also trapped in Olympus, so prison would make sense. Hera was brought up a lot too, and according to wiki Hera persuaded Aphrodite to make her son make Medea fall in love with a mortal named Jason, so more than likely the lady is Hera. Their king will rise from earth could be the king from the battle of the labrynth, maybe. Or another king ya know there are so many.

Wait a minute

Something else I know about their names is Jason’s last name...JASON GRACE I thought it sounded familiar, because of Thalia Grace. Hah look at me being correct. That explains the flying and not being burnt by a lightning bolt—oh I’m stupid for not seeing it sooner.

Now just gotta figure out who Piper’s parent is.

Aha so I was right it was Hera.

Chiron not being able to give the information they need is kind of annoying.

Enceladus? So a giant offspring of Gaia, um...no bueno. Not a king tho.

“Child of lightning, beware the earth, The giants’ revenge the seven shall birth, The forge and dove shall break the cage, And death unleash through Hera’s rage.”

Okay theory time, child of lightning is obviously Jason. Beware the Earth...yeah no clue. The giants’ revenge the seven shall birth, the giants are probably the children of Gaia since that one giant was her child and it’s the seven are probably the seven half bloods from the great prophecy. The forge and dove shall break the cage, um maybe Leo is the forge since he’s hephaestus’s child (probably butchered the spelling). Doves are typically associated with aphrodite/venus, so idk about that. Maybe Piper is Venus’s child, I mean her God parent is her mom and it’d be funny since she was judging the other aphrodite kids. Also I assume Hera will kill whoever trapped her or someone involved since she’s so mad. Idk.

Could kill Drew btw.

CALLED IT CALLED IT CALLED IT IM A GENIUSSS

Wait. This woman looks like Hera, her clothes are made of Earth and she said Leo would fight her children trying to wake her. They’re gonna try to wake Gaia, which would make sense that it said stay away from Earth if she’s the Earth Goddess

I like the wolves thing because Romulus and Remus, ya know the twin boys who were raised by wolf and started Rome.

“You are our saving grace, as always. The she-wolf curled her lip, as if she had just made a clever joke”

I mean yeah his last name is grace

“She must really like this Percy guy to search for him so hard, and that made Jason a little envious. Was anyone searching for him right now? What if somebody cared for him that much and was going out of her mind with worry, and he couldn’t even remember his old life?”

so what if Percy’s just chilling at the Roman version of camp halfblood without a clue to who he is? bro.

Imagine reading this and seeing all of things I get right and wrong and wanting to slam your head into a wall.

Okay like idk why Annabeth was freaking out we kind of knew they were siblings, I mean they have the same dad. Unless this is saying they have the same mom or are twins or something. That’d be cool. That’s probably what he’s saying tbh but still, could’ve emphasized it more than “that’s my sister” like dude.

Anyway, they look very different so that’s funny.

King Boreas? uh.

Oo French

Let’s see what I can translate from the very little duolingo I did. Bienvenu, maybe a greeting. Idk which tho. Je suis Piper, I am Piper. Et c’est Jason, fils de Zeus, and this is Jason, son of Zeus. Vous parlez francais? tres bien, you speak french? good. Hey not bad, not shockingly good but considering I did the duolingo lessons 4 years ago, not bad. Vrai? Truth? Yeah I just looked it up.

Danny devito is alive!

“Leo scratched his head. “Well, I dunno about Enchiladas—”

“Enceladus,” Piper corrected.”

Leo is me omfg

DANNY DEVITO IS BACK

Arrows...HUNTERS OF ARTEMIS PLS?

“Leo stepped out next. “You’re catching me, too, Superman. But I ain’t holding your hand.”

this made me laugh ok moving on

Uh fight a sea monster? bro is Jason just Percy 2.0

“Aphrodite’s message was clear: This one needs no improvement.

And Piper agreed.”

I wonder if you can hear me squealing from hundreds or thousands of miles away

Did you miss the fact that he’s thirty feet tall— I DIED

Who slew titan k-what now? So basically yes. Percy 2.0

Okay I recognize the name Hazel, and all I ask is that she is not involved with Jason because Jason and Piper are really freaking cute.

an exchange of leaders, SO THEY DID SWITCH THEM

The way I called it

I WAS RIGHT AHA

anyways. time to read son of neptune

#rick riordan #percabeth #jason grace #thalia grace #piper x jason #the lost hero #heroes of olympus #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #hera #aphrodite #leo valdez

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neshabeingchildish · 5 years ago

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Poly Wanna? Ch.3

A/N: Anonymous Guest - If you’d like to have a chat about these things, say it with your chest, and I’ll say my part. We’ll have an exchange. If you want to use the space set aside for reviews without identification or giving me the opportunity to reply to you personally, then I have to give you the two cents here and everyone has to be subjected to it. It’s an M rating story, so I’ll presume you have your big girl panties on and can take a reply and for anyone else around, in case they have some confusion about my stand on these things, this applies to all.

I just want to remind everybody that this is free labor and if you want somebody to do anything on your timetable, you oughtta go ahead and fund them. You don’t? Cool. Take wtf they’re willing to give you. Or leave it. None of us have to be here. If you’re here because you would love to read a story that I am currently writing, I’d love for you to stick around and will give you the best story that my skills have to offer, free of charge and therefore not obliged to demands. If you’re here to be an executive producer with a production schedule, you made a wrong turn at the intersection of Fuck You and Pay Me. Thanks for your time. I understand if ours together has come to an end. Read what brings you what you want to see and feel, and I’ll write what brings me that WHEN I write it!

I will abandon this and delete it before turning over authority on what happens here to anybody, or subjecting myself to being treated like a content mule. Juneteenth happened, Sis. You don’t have no slaves here. In the immortal words of my mama, and many-a-Black-mamas, “I’m not one of your lil’ friends.” You better approach me like you got some sense if you trying to ASK ME to do something for my consideration. Peace and many blessings. And now, my update…

@adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel @cactus-con @up-the-tube @riebellion @itsyaapollochild@oof–musicals @lesbian-so-what @woahjusttakeiteasy-man @meadowstryingtobepretty @imma-sensitive-btch @okaygal21 @midernacht @divinereign4ever @xoxoemille

A Very Henry Morning

Henry generally woke up in just enough time to blend some juice and watch the sunrise over Swellview, the city that he fought everyday to protect. It was a lasting ritual, from whenever he was with Charlotte. She would always get up super early for yoga and meditation, blend them some juice, then, he’d get up and watch the sun rise with her. The first time, she tapped him to wake him and said, “Sorry to wake you, but you’ve gotta see this.” He quickly rushed out of bed, wondering if a Swellview emergency was underway. This was more important! She went to the balcony of their apartment, cute body clad in her yoga gear and just stared at the rising sun, in awe. “It’s like whenever the day starts anew, not only is it another chance to get things a little more right, but she really brings the day in, in style.” Charlotte was smiling as the morning got gradually brighter and staring at the lifebringing star until it became too bright to behold. Henry was looking at her.

He wanted to ask her if she really thought that was worth waking him up this early, knowing that he went to sleep late at night after crime fighting, but just the way she drank it all in and the way it became a little brighter and a little warmer as he drank her in… Instead, he’d said, “Tomorrow, wake me up earlier! We almost missed it,” and gave her a kiss on her cheek. Presently, he had been doing this without her now for 6 years. “She really brings the day in, in style,” he would say out loud to himself, every time. For years, he did it hoping that Charlotte was somewhere out there, doing the same and that for that moment in time, they were connected again. He would imagine her in whatever her current form had been from (cyberstalking her) and he would recall the way that she looked whenever they first did this.

When he was with Jasper, he didn’t share that moment with him. It seemed unfair to Charlotte, even though even being involved with Jasper was another betrayal of sorts, the sunrise was holy. It was set apart. It was a part of he and Char that was too big, too bright for anybody, even her to ever be able to take away from him… and he was too selfish to share it with anybody else, even Jasper.

Now, his internal clock was set to make the juice and go to the terrace. He watched the sunrise and then, and only then was he willing to begin his day. Henry usually finished off his juice before the sun rose fully and put the glass into the wash when he came back in. He grabbed his watering pot and went to water all of his plants that needed it and simply check in with the ones that didn’t. “The sunrise was beautiful today. Forecast is that she might scorch you if I let you outside, but I’ll definitely let her in, so she can kiss you all on your little faces,” he said. He himself kissed flowers. He himself touched them lovingly, talked to them, asked nothing more of them than for them to be healthy and flourish, but sometimes shared his life with them. Henry had a therapist, but he knew whenever he spoke to his therapist that he was speaking to a therapist and he, as a therapist sometimes worried about whether he was handling his own therapy properly, or if his fears got into the way of his needs. Speaking with his plants helped him to figure out when he was being unreasonable, irrational, or counterproductive. Because, the way that he spoke with them was like one would a child that they love with their whole heart, explaining things for them to understand, and being honest and realistic, but protecting them from one’s own problems. Accountability mattered when you spoke with someone you loved. You would honestly do whatever you could to make sure that they don’t see you differently and make the declarations to better yourself to them. He did that with his plants, then shared the genuine portions that he walked away with for therapy. They kept him honest.

He kept a 3 foot garden statue of Blodeuwedd in his home and had various depictions of her flowers form in artwork all over the place, along with other deities, myths, legends associated with flowers. He’d keep statues nearby the plants to “protect them,” in that way that a dad looks underneath the bed and in the closet for monsters. He’d collected Flora, Khloris, Hegemone, among others but, Blodeuwedd was his favorite, for some reason. Unless you counted Dionysus! Now, one thing about that guy was that he was known mostly for his partying, yeah? Wine, fertility, ritual madness�� People generally thought orgies and drunkenness… which… make no mistake, Henry was not opposed to and would even call himself a fan, but Dionysus was also, among these other fun things, god of the grape harvest… He was a god of fruitfulness and vegetation! Henry felt like it was unfair to simply see him as a wild hedonist when he was to thank for fertility and cultivation. Henry was pro-fair… And maybe, just maybe identified with the demigod, just a little bit.

Folk rarely saw the portion of Henry that loved as hard as he did when he experienced the sun saying good morning to all of nature and made his first moves of her arrival an offering to those who could not live without her. Now, let’s not get ahead of ourselves, Henry Hart is no mystic. He doesn’t worship the sun, the plants, or any of the gods and goddess spread around his home for the aesthetics. But, whenever he spent time with these plants, whenever he gave love to his flowers, he believed in something greater than himself, and that was all of the faith that he needed to go out and protect this world everyday.

People were fine, or whatever… but also they were human. They were the threats to nature, to the earth, the environment, and all that the sun shone on everyday. Mister Feelgood never had to fight an animal. It was always people that did the evil that required his life’s work to exist. Many moons ago, he had fought a bear, but since then wondered if other steps might have been taken. Captain Man was not one to really do the sensible thing in a fight scenario.

As he got older, Henry tried to figure out ways to best avoid a fight. He was fast approaching 30, probably would reach it before he knew it, and he was in great shape - the best shape of his life, but he also knew that this vessel expiration date. He wasn’t Captain Man. He wasn’t indestructible, and some of his peers were already discussing that the warranties on their knees had lapsed. A few years ago, he might have replied, “RIP to them, but I’m different.” But, he was showing signs of power failure, himself. He became sore more easily than he did as Kid Danger, well, since the early days, at least. He was sore all of the time from ages 13-15. He thought it would never stop. That his body would ache for the rest of his life.

By 16, he was accustomed to his hypermotility, trained to perfection in its usage and skilled beyond his wildest thoughts in fighting technique. He didn’t have a single pain for almost 2 years. Then, Rick Twitler stripped him of that. The soreness increased, as he spent more energy to get used to things, but he adjusted pretty quickly and became just as trained and skilled with his normal Henry body. It worked out for him for years, in and out of that outfit. But, by 25, he started getting a little more tired than usual.

He worked on his diet and regulated his energy levels better. Within another year, he started feeling like he needed more sleep at night. He began a vitamin regimen and looked into some natural remedies for fatigue and sleep deprivation. Now, even his libido was changing. Pre-Charlotte Henry kissed strangers, made out with hot villains, hooked up with any cute flavor that would give him the time of day. That seemed to be normal teenage behavior, in his mind. Post-Charlotte Henry was a little more reserved for a while. He’d had this life changing relationship, failed at it, and wanted to proceed with either extreme self destruction, or instant carnal gratification. There was no in between. He either was a hermit, or a hoe, for months after they broke up, and only tried to moderate that whenever he began seeing Jasper.

Unfortunately for Jasper, Post-Charlotte Henry was still suffering when he picked up what they had, so… while he was truly trying, he still had the tendency to accelerate from hubby to harlot goals in a heartbeat. Unfortunately for Jasper, Henry had not yet gotten to the point where he could honestly and objectively take a look at his own fuckery and see where he messed up and he certainly wasn’t about tackling sorting through his own heartbreak so that he wouldn’t become one of those hurt people who hurt people. Unfortunately for Henry, Jasper was a keeper, and he was still so heartbroken that he lost the one keeper that he could acknowledge back then, that he lost ANOTHER. How the fuck did you throw away two keepers, you egotistical, emotionally stunted, self-centered, sex crazed… He stopped himself. Speak about your mistakes in the same way that you would speak to a friend about theirs. When you have no friends that you can think of, though… Speak to yourself like you would speak to the lost ones. To Charlotte. To Jasper…

He grabbed his hygiene bag - it was like a tactical control bag, but full of his facial and skin care, dental products, and his cleansing and fragrance supplies. The bag was full of things that he used on a daily basis, and also his weekly and monthly care. Henry took care of himself. His hair, skin, and teeth were always a priority that he was sure rubbed off from Char, too. Hell, they were together the first 4 years after graduation. Those were formative years for him. He used to wash his face and body with the same damn soap, his face with his hands and his body with a loofah that he always kept until it fell apart. He used to brush his teeth within 40 seconds. His hair took the most time of everything he did and all he ever did was wash it with a shampoo and conditioner 2 in 1… and if he ran out, the same damn soap he washed his face and body with!

Charlotte got him into separate cleaners and applicators. Like, whenever he washed his face, he didn’t even do so in the shower, because he had an entire process to make sure his face was well cared for and the shower wash wouldn’t be timed right for it. Usually, he did wipe his face in the shower, because of washing his hair and the water and steam, but he didn’t really wash it until he did his face after the shower. The shower itself, he would wash his hair, let conditioner set in it and then wash his body, some of his parts had different cloths, ALL of the cloths went into the laundry when he finished washing up. He always moisturized his damp skin, and put on his deodorant before his facial routine, which was kind of extensive, but had him looking better at 27 than he had at 17, meanwhile… not to say that Jasper looked bad, but… He definitely hadn’t aged as well as Henry and Char had and perhaps she’d help him, like she helped Henry.

Her influence had helped him become the casanova that he dreamed himself to be when he was younger. Though lately, his desire had been limited. He didn’t even get off on the thrill of the chase anymore. He was super focused on this television project, so he thought maybe that might be affecting things. He wondered and worried if throughout recording that he might have to play up his sexual conquests so that his life would look more like it had looked for the past few years, or if the show would simply redefine him, or worse, make him look like he was faking for TV, since he didn’t seem to want to go on any dates at the moment. He always went on dates. People knew that. If he wasn’t on a date, he was at a party and he was coming home with somebody’s date.

He had family game night at his parents’ neighbors’ house a couple of weeks before and whenever they were playing word association games. Someone said Henry, and every member of his family said one of the following list: Slut, sex, and STD. He didn’t want to say who said what but at the same time that he told Piper, “I have never once had an STD. I’m a sex therapist for crying out loud!” his mother was asking his father, “Why would you say SEX?” And his “I’m a sex therapist for crying out loud!” Conveniently replied to both Piper and his mom. But… he was still a little embarrassed. Nobody said gardening or flowers. Nobody said therapist. Nobody said even the word that he had been to them for 27 years, 21 for Piper - son, brother, dude who lived with us? He sighed. That was worse than that time that one of Piper’s friends referred to him, not even as Piper’s promiscuous brother… “What was the point of the adjective?” he’d asked.

He wasn’t embarrassed so much as hurt, a little bit. Because all throughout his adolescence, nobody knew him outside of being a friend to hometown faves. Charlotte Page, the smartest girl in town. Jasper Dunlop, a hero and an activist against unjust laws. Ray Manchester, the longest running most handsome man in Swellview. Piper “the Queen of Harts,” child commercial actress and self made public figure/influencer. And someone actually told him, “Honestly, I don’t think anybody would care how many chicks you banged if you weren’t Piper Hart’s brother. You’re a sex therapist and probably a sex addict and you have a sister who began the Holdin’ Out for a Hero chastity challenge.”

Little did that person know, that challenge got Mister Feelgood as much ass as Henry Hart. But, now, for some reason, he couldn’t even think about doing that. He wasn’t sure what was wrong with him until today’s shower. Up until then, he just presumed he was getting old and tired of it. Like, dating was exhausting sometimes and parties seemed louder than they used to. Sex? Still awesome. That could never change, but… whenever he had the chance for any, he would prefer to pass.

He had a date the night that he asked Jasper to speak with him about the venture. “I wanna ask Charlotte, as well, but I still have no access to her,” Henry said, casually. There wasn’t a hint of sadness in his voice or even in his heart at that moment, because it had been nearly seven years and Charlotte being out of the loop and out of his life was commonplace, now.

“Does it pay, because I can probably get her to entertain the thought, if it does?” Jasper asked.

“Who are you talking about?” Henry heard a voice ask in the close background… Like real close… like.. Either hovering right over Jasper’s shoulder, or sitting in his lap close.

“Shhh. You,” Jasper said. Like… their voices seemed to be coming from the same place.

“Don’t you SHHH me!” She snapped and it was right in Henry’s ear! Like she was holding the phone. Even with her being loud and angry in his ear, this was one of the sweetest sounds Henry had heard in years. Her actual voice. She sounded different, older, but pretty much the same. Her language and tone definitely brought back memories. All he had was old footage of her at different times. This was more than he bargained for whenever he called Jasper’s phone. He didn’t even know that they were in communication with each other and they sounded… so close…

She and Jasper were fussing and sounded like tussling, probably Jasper trying to move the phone away as he softly said, “Henry’s asking me about meeting up with him at the old spot about some business.”

“Oh,” she said, and then her voice faded into the background saying, “Well, yeah, I’d talk to Henry for money, I guess.”

Jasper whispered something to her that Henry couldn’t hear, then it sounded like he kissed her? Then it sounded like she giggled. Henry… felt… so odd in that moment. Jasper returned to the call and said, “Sorry. Charlotte knocked me off of the bed,” he laughed.

“The bed?” Henry repeated, halfway in a daze, halfway like he didn’t understand the word or phrase the bed was what you said about your bed. Was he and Charlotte in this bed together?

“Yeah,” Jasper seemed to read his mind. “You.. haven’t seen any of my posts tagging her?”

“No, she has me blocked on everything.”

“Yeah, but I don’t.”

“She actually went into the programs and made them to where Schwoz can’t hack her, so I’m sure she’s got a way for me to not even be able to see her through someone else’s feed.”

“Oh… well…” Jasper laughed a little bit uncomfortably. He had thought that Henry knew, but he could tell that he was just putting it together, “We’re a couple now!” He cheered. “It’s still new, but… yeah..”

Henry wasn’t quite sure which of the multitude of emotions would wind up taking over for the night, but in that moment while he let a silent tear fall, he cleared his throat, put on his happiest voice and said, “That’s awesome for both of you! You two deserve people like each other. Bring her along to the brownstone for the meeting, then. That’ll be good..” After he hung up, he cancelled his date. He didn’t want to put his mixture of emotions on anyone else tonight. That night, he opened a bottle of wine that he was saving for some special occasion or another… He never really had special occasions, so mostly wine that he saved for special occasions either remained right where they were, or rarely, there were nights like that night, where the occasion was that he found out the love of his life and the person he regretted hurting the most were together… and he didn’t know which one of them was which, even as he contemplated that fact. Both of them were, in their own ways, the love of his life. Charlotte had been his first love. Jasper had been his second chance. He didn’t fully grasp either of their importance until their presences were snatched away. Neither of them are that foolish. They’ll recognize what they have in each other and it will last forever. His lost ones. The ones that got away. They’ll have a great love. A beautiful love. A strong love. And… he might not ever be able to witness it, if he can’t charm Charlotte into putting up with him, but maybe worse, he’ll be able to and have access to her, then he’ll see it take place and mourn from the outside that they had (what they deserved) without him. He drank the entire bottle and fell asleep on the daybed on the terrace. He hadn’t felt sexual since then.

But, after he met up with Charlotte and Jasper, something happened. He grabbed his hygiene bag, like we covered before, he went to prep and recalled how Charlotte helped him step his game up, then he was thinking about when they used to share showers. She liked that. Sharing showers and stories in the steam, washing each other’s backs and each other’s hair, kissing, touching, oiling each other up to nourish the skin… everything else.

He wondered as he was washing off if she was doing that with Jasper now… Making him hotter, cleaner, flawless, while engaging in conversations that bring them closer together and just being sexy AF in the process. If they were in the shower, kissing, touching… everything else and before he knew it, he definitely was feeling sexual again. His libido had not failed him after all. It was the shower, so he made quick work of handling his business and moving along. However, when he got out of the shower, and prepared to do his face, he saw that he looked refreshed. He looked happy again. He at least looked like he was himself, again. So… Maybe he wouldn’t be on any dates any time soon, but fantasizing about Charlotte and Jasper wasn’t harming anyone and seemed to help him a lot this morning. So, that was what he would do, if he needed that.

#Poly Wanna #Nesha HD Fics #henry danger #henry hart #charlotte page #jasper dunlop #hd ot3 #Accidentally posted on the main if you got a dead tag

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imma-lil-teapot · 6 years ago

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Each TMNT Incarnation and Where They Stand With Me :)

(Nervous chuckle) ... Yeah no, I suck at titles. Moving on!

Y’all can go ahead and skip this part if you’re not interested in senseless rambling and just wanna get to the TMNT fun~ ;)

Soooooo, I’ve recently updated my Tumblr page to a blog dedicated to all my fandoms (musing, headcanons, writing, gifs, pics, the works, basically anything and everything in relation to them) since I wasn’t really ever doing anything with it other than using it to share pics mostly. But ever since I stumbled back into the TMNT fandom, I’ve been searching Tumblr for fan content and OMGOSH, did I hit the jackpot! Headcanons, fanfics, Turtle x reader stories, so much juicy stuff! Am hooked! Dunno why I never tried searching for similar stuff in the past for my other fandoms! I guess I just... didn’t realize there was so much content here. :O But anyway, I always wanted a place to share ideas and thoughts regarding my fandoms outside of sites like Deviantart and Fanfiction.net, and heck, it’s been here under my nose all this time... Y’all gonna have to forgive me; I’m an old fart. ;P (Insert image of Slowpoke for reference) So without further ado...

LET’S GET THIS PIZZA PARTY STARTED!

Imma start this blog off really simple and, as the title states, just give you all a small-ish idea of where each TMNT universe stands (or ranks?) with me, personally... Note the ‘personally’ part so please don’t feel offended if I don’t share the same opinion as you on a particular verse. ^^; I have my own tastes and will respect the next person’s when it comes to them. ;) Also, please beware the typos (which there most definitely will be)...

IN RELEASE DATE ORDER: (Hopefully they’re right)

MIRAGE COMICS~

Imma just say it: I haven’t read any of them yet. :/ There probably are sites out there that would allow you to view them online for free, but in truth, I’ve been a little slack about trying to find any... That may however change someday as I always tell myself I should really seek out the source material so it’s only a matter of time. What I do know, however, is that they’re of course a lot darker than most incarnations (which I don’t have a problem with personally) and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t curious as to exactly how much darker. X’D The closest I’ve come to ‘knowing’ these Turts comes from watching the Turtles Forever movie and they weren’t in it for a long time so it’s very difficult to say what they actually mean to me, so we’ll just put these guys down in the ‘not sure’ column for now. ;)

1987 CARTOON~

HAHA~ I think any fan of the franchise as a whole knows this little gem! The series that really hit it off and spawned over a 190 eps! Quite an impressive feat for a Saturday morning cartoon! It made its way to TVs the year before I was born, but it would take another few before it would reach our tubes (we’re always a few years behind the rest of the world :/ ) so I was around four when I was first introduced to it and needless to say, I loved it back then! Michelangelo was initially my fav due to him being my older brothers’ fav and the one they mainly spoke of, but it didn’t take long before my favering gravitated towards Leonardo (even at such a young age) and has been that way ever since. ;) But where exactly does the series stand with me as an adult nowadays with so many other verses we’ve been exposed to? I do hold a lot of nostalgia (as many older do) for it, and I mean, come on, that theme song is ageless, and I even started watching a lot of vids involving the original VAs and the shenanigans they get up to and seriously, it’s so heartwarming and fun to see them! But I have to be honest...

It’s not my fav verse, honestly. I will always adore them, of course, because of the nostalgia and the goofiness... But it’s the latter that’s mostly the reason for it being placed a bit lower on the favoritism ladder. While its a fun watch if you want something lighthearted, I still prefer the idea of the darker undertones that comes with being associated with ninjas. It’s just a preference. Plus, the Turtles designs are big one for me, and I’m sorry to say, but I keep seeing these fellas as more frog-like than turtle, despite the shells. X’D So yeah, no big reasoning for it, and even if someone were to ask me if I like these guys, I’ll still say yes, just that they’re not my ultimate fav is all. ;)

Also, we won’t talk about the Japanese Anime Ninja Turtles: Superman Legend or something to that extent... We’ll just let that one be gently swept under the carpet. ;) Only ever saw the trailer for it and that’s all I’ll ever need to see in my lifetime.

1990 MOVIES TRILOGY~

Now funny enough, I really don’t remember ever seeing these movies as a kid, though it’s possible I did and just maybe blocked the memory, but I highly doubt it... So yeah, I saw these movies as an adult already. The first is praised by most fans, and honestly, I can see why: it’s pretty good! :D The acting is very decent and the humour’s brilliant! The two sequels... not so much but still okay. ;) Where they sit with me... Not too far on the ladder again I’m afraid. :/ While I do really enjoy and appreciate the acting and that humour (”I made a funny.” X’D) it mostly comes down to the Turtles designs again... I really can’t see past them being actors in costumes rather than characters. :’( Granted, good actors. ;) And heck, Jim Henson did a phenomenal job! They’re just not really the movies for me is all, even if I do go back and watch ‘em every now and then. X’D I do however melt every time at the scene in the first movie where Raph wakes up in the bath and Leo’s there and apologizing and all... Makes me all gooey inside! X’D The feels are real! Speaking of Leo, though, he sounds even younger than Mikey. Small nitpick, that, but... why? X’D

But yeah, let’s just say, they’re good movies, just, not my favs.

Also, Coming Out Of Their Shells tour... Yeah, I’m gonna just... pretend that doesn’t exist for a minute.

THE NEXT MUTATION~

Nope.

Saw one ep as a kid and am not interested in seeing anymore.

Although, VA Matt Hill voices Raph. That’s one good thing.

2003/2k3~

Well it wasn’t already apparent by my avatar... Ladies and gents, I present to you... My fav TMNT verse to date! Oh my goodness, where do I even begin with this delicious series?! :D Firstly, animation: so appealing, comic book-y style! Their designs: without sounding pervy, veeeeeeeery appealing (hehehehehe), no seriously, they sometimes have a bitta bulk to them but it honestly works, and dem muscles, and the cool eyes! The VAs: spot on! Perfect! Wouldn’t have ‘em any other way! Make me melt, Mr. Michael Sinterniklaas~ (cough) Their personalities: Omgosh, just yes! So perfect! They’re easily differentiated and yet still work together so well. Leo’s mature and level-headed (well, most of the time ;P ) yet still gets tested a lot and even has a fun side that’s shown on occasion. Raph’s grouchy and violent but is shown on more than one occasion that’s he’s total softie and really does care. Don’s just a sweetheart and freakishly smart and even has slips ups from time to time. Mikey... omgosh, best Mikey ever! So much fun! So hilarious! And just a bundle of energy, but not at all an idiot like he’s sometimes portrayed in other verses. He’s witty, mischievous and just so adorable! Heck, even Master Splinter, April, Casey, the lot of them are just awesome in this series! And wow, they really do lean more towards the source material (or so I’m told) when it comes to the plots! It’s darker than the other previous verses yet still remaining kid-friendly (although I question it at times XD) and omgosh, it’s just everything I want in a TMNT universe! Granted, it’s not perfect perfect, but it nailed it for me. ;) It really showed so lovely character developments, alsortsa different genres, the humour will leave you in stitches, the Turts are all just so lovable, I can’t get enough of them! This series was really my high point and I’ve yet to find one that tops it~

Btw, this even includes Fast Forward and Back to the Sewer (BTTS). The former being my least fav of the series simply due to the setting and again, it’s just preference. I even liked BTTS, even though I’m not overly fond of a cyberspace setting, but I found myself really liking the art style and the general plot. :D

2007/2k7~

As with the last, if you’ve picked up on the page’s header/banner, you’d have probably guessed that the 2007 movie is also a good candidate for one my favs... And you’d be correct. ;) I’m actually very fond of this movie, and it’s largely due to the Turtles designs. I love how they were done! They just look so cool! <3 Subtle differences tell the viewer who’s who even if they didn’t have a mask or weapons. The VAs were also pretty good~ Now, the story isn’t the greatest, I’ll admit. Personally I thought it was okay, but know many fans think otherwise. But I did like the confrontation between Leo and Raph! It got real there, peeps! :O Now here’s also where it falls a little on its face for me: I didn’t really like how they handled Leo’s personality (if you haven’t already picked up on it, yes, I’m a Leo fangirl and I’m picky when it comes to how they handle his personality) but it’s a nitpick again, yet, I still feel compelled to state my opinion: the whole “I’m better than you.” comment really took me back and made me think they pushed it. I honestly like to believe he’d never actually say something like that... at least, 2003!Leo wouldn’t. X’D But that’s just my problem: I’m comparing a different verse’s Leo to this one and whether I like it or not, he said it. :/ Oh well, it still made for some fun action scenes and I’ll still always like the movie.

Bit of a goof on my side: I honestly thought that this movie was made to tie in with the 2003!verse due to the timeline in which it was produced, but turns out, it’s actually closer to the 1990′s timeline although still considered it’s own verse.

2012/2k12~

Oooh boy, lemme prepare for the backlash real quick... I’m uhhhh... not a fan of these boys. :/ I don’t mind them, but I’m honestly never gonna watch the series again. It’s hard to top your fav when you’ve kinda already hit your high point, ya know. Now before you light your torches and sharpen your pitchforks, hear me out: I will never bash the series, or make fun of anyone who likes it! Or anything to that extent! It’s just wasn’t for me, plain and simple, and it’s got nothing to do with it being ‘new’ or I’m just an old fart stuck in my ways. Heck, If you’re still reading, you would’ve found out that even nostalgia couldn’t beat the series that grasped me in my teens! So no, it has nothing to do with age. But if you do need a reason: I wasn’t overly fond of how they handle the characters. For one, they look and act a bit too young, Mikey is just... wow, something else. Donnie’s... sheesh, pretty snappy and antagonising. Raph’s well... okay, he’s meant to be angry half the time, and they did give him some more layers with Spike and Mona Lisa and whatnot, but he still kinda never learns his lesson if I can say that? He’ll learn that he shouldn’t cause issues with others, yet next episode he’s back at it again. :/ Leo’s... wow, just not like other Leos. X’D Best way I can describe him is... young? Very childlike. And even when he was progressing to becoming this better leader, I honestly couldn’t even see the change. My mind was just stuck on this “He’s a babeh.” notion. Also, I’m not even gonna start on this April and Casey. Just. No. Most of the characters were annoying and I just kept seeing recycled plot after plot. What I did like was the romance that blossomed between Raph and Mona (albeit far too rushed) and even Donnie liking April was adorable (but seriously Donnie, you can do so much better), and there were some really heartfelt moments, like Splinter telling Leo to leo his brothers with his heart and not his head, and the scenes when they were Tots will always make me squeal... But yeah... without leaving any spoilers.... about Splinter... just... thanks, Nickelodeon. Y’all know what I mean. Not once... But twice.... Really? So yeah, look, I realized some of those reasons might even be petty, but again, it’s just not the series for me, but anyone who’s a fan... You keep being a fan! ;) I’m glad you can enjoy something I can’t. ;)

2014/2k14/2016/2k16 AKA BAYVERSE~

HAHA~ Every fan’s favorite... If only. X’D Jokes aside, despite many fans claiming the Bay movies ruined the franchise, these two films gathered a small following... And I’m apart of it. :) Funny enough, I honestly didn’t know what to think of them when the movie first came out. I think I was just taken aback by the sheer amount of detail and all that went into their designs. I didn’t not like them, but again, their designs were a lot to take in. :O Even now after seeing the movies quite a few times over, I find myself constantly discovering something I didn’t notice on them before, be it a strap or a scar etc. And it honestly took some getting use to their sizes, I mean, sheesh! :O Not to mention the different background story, and Megan Fox’s wooden, expressionless acting, but despite all that... I found myself actually growing attached to these hulks of Turtles. They still have a lot of that heart in them and plus they’re just so much fun, I mean, can we say ‘Elevator scene’? X’D Now again, not perfect by anys mean, but still fun and pretty decent incarnations to add to the franchise. Again, Leo’s been given this ‘Better than you’ a bit which irked me to be frank. Not always but it’s there sometimes, but otherwise alright. Raph’s a decent Raph. Even had some tender moments. Donnie’s adorable! X’D This slightly potty mouthed geek that you just gotta love. And Mikey... although given that bitta ‘idiot’ feel, is also just as lovable and you want to hug him every time he’s onscreen!

In short, I like ‘em. :) They’re actually closer to the top of the ladder than some others.

RISE OF THE TMNT/ROTTMNT/2018/2K18~

Yeeeeeeeeuuuuuuh... no. Sorry. Not for me. :/ Again, gonna remind y’all, nothing to do with age. Nothing to do with change. I will say that the fluid animation is nice, and the fact that they chose 2D animation. :) Buuuuuut, wow, they were certainly a lot to take in. Almost as much as Bay’s Turtles. After watching a few eps, I will conclude that they really just aren’t what I’m looking for. I found that the constant joking, while sometimes funny, got a little bit much, plus such short eps. Raph being leader was a switch and one that took awhile to get use to and honestly, I’m just not for it, I don’t even know where to begin with Donnie, Mikey’s okay, Leo... (deep breath) I don’t know what they were thinking... Let’s not even go to Master Splinter. But anyways, I get that change was what they were going for and that it was more so based on the 1987 toon with the silliness so that’s fine. I’m glad it’s got so many fans. :) And honestly, I wanna end off just by saying...

That no matter what your thoughts on what I’ve said, I hope you can respect my opinions and choices cause at the end of the day, they’re just my own, and I will always respect yours! :D If you adore the verses I’m not too crazy about, that’s great! :D I want you all to love the heck out of them! And honestly, this is what’s so great about this franchise: there are so many verses to choose from! So many options and tastes to suit any and all! You don’t have to follow the masses! You go enjoy whichever incarnation(s) you want to! ;)

And there we have it, my first fandom bloggy thingy~ Hope there’ll be many more where that came from! :D

This is Drag0n-Mistr3ss signing off~

#tmnt #incarnations #favorite #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 1987 #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 1990 #rottmnt

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shikai-the-storyteller · 6 years ago

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The unofficial “Change, In All Things, Is Inevitable” playlist.

Here’s some of the music I listened to while working on this fic, plus a few key lyrics and some commentary about each song:

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Gladiator – Zayde Wolf

Imma give you a second just to catch your breath / 'Cause I can see that your heart is jumpin' out your chest / I know you gave it all 'cause I've already seen your best, and it’s time you accepted this

Let me tell ya / I've got every reason to fight

This song is great because it pumps me up and then 1 minute and 50 seconds into it, the tone does a complete 180 and gives me serious chills. It reminds me of current Megatron vs. past Megatron, and his initial motivation for starting the Decepticon revolution in the first place. I think he lost his guiding principles along the way, but his anger and gladiator might hasn’t gone anywhere. It’s a perfect Megatron song for obvious (and not so obvious) reasons.

Church – Fall Out Boy

Megatron: Take the pain / Make it billboard big then swallow it for me / Time-capsule for the future / Trust me, that's what I will be Soundwave: Oh, the things that you do in the name of what you love Orion Pax: I love the world but I just don't love the way it makes me feel

Church makes me think of the early days of the revolution when Orion, Soundwave, and Megatronus were all working together towards the same goal. The chorus is fitting for all of them; their friendship was a sanctuary of sorts, and it gave them the kind of support / relationship none of them ever had before (at least in Megatron’s case). Friendship was a novel, strange, but wonderful thing. Pity it didn’t last long :’I

If I’m being completely honest, Toastyhat’s animatic for this song definitely influenced my associations, what with the gladiator ring and all that, haha. It’s a fantastic animation, and I highly recommend checking it out if you haven’t already.

Meet Me on the Battlefield – Svrcina

We carry on through the storm / Tired soldiers in this war / Remember what we're fighting for Our tainted history, is playing on repeat / But we could change it if we stand up strong and take the lead When I was younger, I was named / A generation unafraid / For heirs to come, be brave

This melancholic song is a perfect fit for the tone of the war, and Optimus’ feelings on it. Poor guy never expressed interest in being a Prime, but he never really got a say in the matter. The best he can do is keep moving forward hoping it’ll one day come to an end.

(Side note: someone’s done a TFP AMV with this song! Go check it out.)

Run to You – Pentatonix

I've been settling scores, I've been fighting so long / But I've lost your war and our kingdom is gone I will break down the gates of heaven / A thousand angels stand waiting for me

Very much a melancholic unrequited Soundwave --> Megatron song. I don’t care how many times I listen to this; my heart always aches for poor Soundwave and the ending he got in TFP. He would’ve gone to hell and back for Megatron (and I suppose, in a way, he did).

Battle Cry – Imagine Dragons

Stars are only visible in darkness / Fear is ever-changing and evolving Nobody can save you now / The only sound is the battle cry

Another great song for Megatron! He reveled in his fights as a gladiator, and war is no different. It’s his challenge to Optimus and anyone else who'd dare oppose him. In essence, I see it as Megatron’s “If you’re not with me, then you’re against me, and you’d better be damn well prepared to be treated like an enemy” song.

The “stars are only visible in darkness” line also reminds me of Optimus and Megatron’s conversation in IDW’s “The Transformers” #22 comic, where Megatron goads Optimus, saying he would’ve been no one and nothing without him / the war:

Also: I genuinely had no idea this was a Bayverse song until recently so sHHH LET ME LIVE

Chains – Radical Face

I thought I had control, that I could always walk away if things turned bad / We were thick as thieves 'til I became the one who always went too far / And I couldn't hear you In the end I'm lost / And I'll drag you down yeah, that's my cost / But I'm glad you were my friend

Finally, the song that helped inspire this fic! Definitely gives me strong MegaOp vibes. Despite everything that wound up happened, Megatron and Optimus were each other’s biggest influences for a loooong time. That’s not the kind of thing that can be forgotten easily! I think Megatron was briefly reminded of the friendship they once had at the end of Predacon Rising. Megatron doesn’t strike me as the kind of guy who has regrets, but I still wonder if anything akin to it crossed his mind before the end.

A few bonus lighthearted joke songs: A Little Help From My Friends – The Beatles This song came up on my playlist while I was editing some early chapters where Megatron / Orion / Soundwave were still buddies, which I thought was ironic, sweet, and a little bit sad. Take A Chance On Me – ABBA An example of a song I associated with a character as a joke, then thought about WAY too much to the point where it’s no longer a joke. Anyways, please imagine Soundwave playing this every time Megatron passes him up in favor of the Decepticon’s latest traitorous and/or knuckleheaded senior officer. (Seriously though, why on EARTH do you have your most loyal officer as your third in command, Megatron??? Stability and competence clearly mean nothing to you).

Strawberry Blond – Mitski

All I need, darling, is a life in your shape / I picture it, soft, and I ache

This song is perhaps a little bit too wistful / lighthearted for the TFP continuity, but the tone (and the topic of unrequited love) reminded me of a young love-struck Orion Pax. (This was supposed to be a fun addition to this list but the more I think about it, the sadder I get :’I I’m so sorry your life sucked so much, Orion).

Songs reminding me of other TF continuities that nonetheless influenced this fic: Firewall – Les Friction

Deep beneath the light / A spark will now ignite You will see me now / This is my world now

A great G1 / IDW song that’s particularly good for Megatron and Optimus. I could dissect every single line of this song and create an entire MV to it, but I’ll spare you the 10 page essay. Just listen to the song and let your imagination run wild! So many lines are perfect!!! Alright I lied, here’s a few good corresponding lines: Megatron: Fear is a device / So quiet and precise / It's not what I allow / Not in my world now Rodimus / the Matrix: This force is in love with you / It wants you safe / It wants you well Shockwave / empurata: This force knows what you can do / And what you can make / With your tattered shell Optimus / the Matrix: Faith in your device / So quiet and precise / Just when, not how / You can feel it now The Autobots: Deep beneath the light / A spark will now ignite The Decepticons: You will see me now / This is our world now

Dangerous Man – Little Dume An absolutely PERFECT IDW Megatron song! Great for Megatron post- his change of heart. I actually am determined to make an MV with him for this song because it’s just that perfect.

Silhouettes – Of Monsters and Men

There's nothing that I'd take back / But it's hard to say there's nothing I regret.

Not necessarily a perfect song for TF, but these two lines from it reminded me so strongly of Megatron / Optimus I figured it was worth making note of.

#i talk #fic talk #I'd still like to do something with ''Run to You'' and / or ''Take A Chance On Me''#music rec #But ''Dangerous Man'' is the biggest one I wanna do #I've had that in mind since I heard the song #Firewall too but I really don't have the energy to draw anything for that #hooo boy I can tell I'm tired because I just wrong ''energon'' instead of ''energy''#I have no idea if anyone reads these tags but I just realized at like midnight that I forgot to write up this post #and I'm supposed to link it in tomorrow's (or I guess today's) chapter end note #so here I am hauling butt to finish writing this #cheers #This will most certainly be edited later

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pastelastronomy24 · 7 years ago

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Laid Up— Erik Killmonger x Plus Size!Poc Reader

Listen, I’m mad that I was ABUSED INTO WRITING THIS BUT I’m a punk bitch so uh here y’all go. Also if this is hot garbage all blame goes to my nigga @killmongersgurl

———————

It was particularly hot on this Monday, and it seemed like niggas high and low decided today would be a kick back day. Gary from across the street had decided to barbecue, the smell of hot links and burgers in the grill filling the summer air. The old folks gathered around the beaten up and raggedy domino table, sipping on henny and yelling out phrases you still didn’t know the meaning of. The lil teenage niggas had long ago forgotten their shirts as they adorned only basketball shorts while they hooped on Mr. Johnson’s driveway. They had been playing the longest game of HORSE you’d ever seen. The little-er niggas were playing around the “Mysteriously” broken fire hydrant, only stopping to get some Fla-Vor-Ice.

It was such a nice little kick back that you decided to join a couple of the neighborhood girls on Auntie Keisha’s porch. The group of you were sitting around talking about your child hood years growing up together and things like how Keisha from next door became Auntie Keisha. You sat on the third step with Ayorie wearing your summer booty shorts and MTV tank top, letting all your thickness show (arms, tummy and all) because it was hot as fuck, and you reallllly didn’t give a mother fuck. Well, until THAT nigga showed up.

Erik “THAT nigga” Stevens was possibly the most popular nigga on the block. He went from “Quintessential Hood Nigga™️” to “Prestigious Hood Nigga™️” as he left your city to go to MIT. You’d never really associated with Erik for several reasons. One because your momma scolded you for having a 5 second conversation with him, claiming that he was “A hit and quit ass bitch” (which wasn’t wrong). And two because you’d spent enough time in high school hearing the phrase “Girrrrrlllll did you hear what Erik did?” which you proceeded to groan and roll your eyes every time because hearing what (and who) Erik did wasn’t worth your time.

Besides all the problematic qualities he possessed, he attracted punani like a moth to a flame. You knew way way way waaaay too many girls who’d fucked with him ( or him in general ) so you most definitely knew that the dick was bomb, but still you didn’t give a fuck. It was when Erik said “Aye Ma?” In a questioning tone that you realized you zoned out and looked to see that Erik was really right in front of you. He was dressed in a simple white tank with short grey sweats. He was of course wearing fresh Jordans which you found bold as fuck considering that they were white and the water from the hydrant had made little mud puddles. You saw that the other girls were looking at you waiting for an answer to a question you really didn’t even hear, and Erik stood with his eyebrow raised. You cocked your head to the side in confusion.

“Did you need something?” You asked incredulously. Erik chuckled and it was like the vibrations from his chest traveled to your body and it was suddenly super hot. How did this nigga exude superiority even in his fucking chuckle?

“I said I know you can braid the fuck outta some hair. Best on the block from what I remember. You think you can hook me up it’s hot as shit. This heat no joke.”

It was like you had both ascended and had a stroke. This dude knew who you were? You couldn’t even believe it. But you also realized that he probably hadn’t had his shit done in a while up in MIT. You looked up at his head and saw that he graced a bun in the back of his head above his fade (his edges almost all over the place). You sighed and nodded

“Alright. You’re gonna owe me $10 and some Canes though nigga” you didn’t expect to sound so bold and almost reeled back in shock. You weren’t going to show him that you were afraid of your own strength though, so you got up and walked into Auntie Keisha’s house asking if she had some Blue Magic, Rubber Bands, Edge Control and a Rattail Comb. She pointed to her bathroom and you went in and quickly grabbed the stuff, heading outside. You sat down on the fourth step while you instructed him to sit on the third.

“You want anything in particular? I can do most things it’s whatever you want.” You said as you pulled the ponytail holder from his dreads and applied edge control.

“Nah princess, I’m putting all of this in your hands.” You literally choked. You knew damn well he was playing games. You began to finger section his hair and tying the rest of it back for your first braid. As you rubbed the blue magic in his scalp he groaned and you were utterly shook. “Look nigga I know you’re like, king of pipe around here but imma need you to chill so I can concentrate.” You scolded him as you slicked the edge control on the back of your hand and onto his dreads. He held his hands up in mock defense. “I swear it’s not my fault your hands feel good as fuck in my scalp, and that’s on some non sexual shit. Every time I get my hair braided the lady is always heavy handed as fuck.” He smacked his teeth and groaned. “Man imma need to come back and have you always braid my shit up.” You laughed.

“Erik I’m not even done. I haven’t even finished this first braid yet.” He shook his head in protest and you smacked him on the forehead lightly mumbling ‘don’t move fool’.

“I’m foreal Y/N. I’ve seen the way that you braid. You’ve hooked up this whole block at least once and you always have everyone lookin fresh. I shoulda asked you to do this shit a long time ago.” You sensed that there was another meaning to what he was saying, but you elected to ignore it.

You spent the next 25 minutes laid up on the porch with Erik talking about life on your block and school life. Like the time Erik got in trouble for correcting Mrs. Evelleta in the 4th grade because she forgot to carry the one in a simple equation. And the time that Erik got caught smashing Aliana under the stairwell in 11th grade,and how Mrs. Lopez didn’t snitch because her “I’m only 21 and you’re kinda fine for a 17 year old” ass was lowkey in love with him. You guys found yourself belly laughing as you unearthed Erik’s bad ass past. You also found yourself braiding a little slower as something that usually only took 15 minutes took 25 because well if you were honest, you didn’t want this interaction to end. You could tell Erik knew what you were doing but he didn’t seem to mind as your fingers sectioned his hair.

Erik had just gotten through the story about the time when he was at some white boy college party and a frat played a Purge Prank on the members when you finished his last braid.

“I’m all done” you said as you finished putting in the last rubber band. You both got up and Erik stretched, his white tank lifting up and revealing the slightest bit of his impeccable stomach. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a multicolored African wallet (because of course that nigga would own a wallet like that). He grabbed 130$ and handed it to you.

“No Erik I only asked for 10$ take your 130$ back” you were about to hand him his extra money when he shook his head and pulled out his phone to look at your work.

“Nah princess, you got my shit looking phenomenal. You better keep that 130$. And I got your fluffy ass for Canes tomorrow aight?” You felt like you just got transported into a parallel universe at his words and internally swooned. You cast your head down and nodded. Erik stepped closer to you and tilted your chin up. “Imma pick you up tomorrow afternoon. And I’m serious about you being my personal braider Ma. Imma be popping up a lot over the summer.” He let go of your chin and smirked as he walked away, a cocky swing in his step. You rolled your eyes as you tried not to appear flustered.

“Yeah whatever nigga, don’t be late I’m serious about my chicken.” You yelled over to him at an attempt to sound hard.

You watched Erik step into his entirely too nice car and drive away, waving goodbye to you.

————————-

PART 2

@killmonger-apologist

#erik killmonger x reader #erik stevens #killmonger #erik killmonger x poc reader #poc reader #plus size reader #plus size imagine #michael b jordan #erik killmonger x plus size reader #marvel #black!reader #black panther #Killmonger Tingz

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blueoatmeal · 7 years ago

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Science Gone Too Far (Brainstorm playlist) Analysis

Basically I’m going to ramble on about why I chose the songs I did. You should probably listen to the mix for this to make much sense.

MTMTE spoilers! (Seriously, don’t read any of this this unless you’ve read probably most of MTMTE. Unless you don’t mind spoilers.)

10/27/17

Okay I’m going to be honest, I saw somebody mention in a post that they imagined Brainstorm dancing in the lab to I Believe In a Thing Called Love and I was like “what song is that” and I listened to it and loved it and continued to listen to it for the next few weeks. I thought, no only is this song fantastic, it fits him. He’s so darn passionate, that guy, and he yearns like nobody’s business. He’s absolutely the kind of guy who’d sing about his desires. I mean ok maybe not out loud he’s like. Super secretive and doesn’t seem to trust a lot of people… he. he doesn’t trust anyone unreservedly, come to think of it, huh. I mean he had good reason to hide what he hid but like. still. huh. anyway if the whole secret thing wasn't a problem he’d totally sing slightly suggestive songs while his spark aches with longing.

Yours Truly, 2095: GOSH one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite albums ever (Time by ELO). How many times have I listened to this in car rides, with family; this song is sososososo close to my heart. Brainstorm is the singer and the robot girl is Perceptor and the lost love BS is trying to contact is Quark and I don’t think I have to explain it beyond that IT FITS SO WELL AAAH!! Also I bet several of you got a kick out of that one word which has such an odd connotation in the tf fandom (which I simultaneously find annoying and utterly hilarious). Anyway, look up the lyrics if you aren’t getting it, it literally. is so fitting. also very scifi and YO time travel eyyy

Weird Science is such a BANGER and heyyy science yeahhh!!! “From my heart and from my hands, why don’t people understand, my intentions,,” bruh, nobody understands why BS does what he does

My Freeze Ray. OK, firstly, science. ray gun. very brainstorm. stopping time, there you go, again very BS. stopping time for love, unrequited love, even, hohhoho. Brainstorm, man.

She Blinded Me With Science. science again! and love! there’s a theme here, see? anyway I’ve loved this song for AGES and its wild and wacky and I love it wholeheartedly and I think it fits brainstorm very well. Maybe even a lovestruck BS

This Too Shall Pass. This,,, is my go-to song for “your love is gone so get over it,” apparently. So, yes. Also just. a great song, and BS would have loved OKGO’s Rube Goldberg machine, and probably their other cool stuff as well tbh. Like he was hanging upside down in chains that one time. The aesthetic is similar

It Takes Love. the song is telling him to move on. “Let the light of another love to shine on you”

Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want, firstly, JRo loves Morrison, so larger thematic fit right there, I guess. anyway like. come on just listen to the lyrics; things haven’t been going all that great tbh for BS and he’s, he just wants this one thing to go right, please, everything else can be forfeit, even his life just, please…let me get what I want. ALSO the part, “make a good man turn bad..” the whole Decepticon thing, there was that

Science Gone Too Far aka Brainstorm’s entire career. also all the rumors that may not be entirely true but like. the truth is even weirder more often than not. so yeah, wild, out-of-control science.

Start Somewhere. kind of out of left field here but this is more between Nautica and BS. this would be before they made up and he apologized. I mean, full disclosure, I haven't even read that far, but yeah. also the gun thing, ..brainstorm has never fired a gun so. significant. metaphorical shots fired only, please. also its a good song??? its a good song. BS owns up to things he’s done.

21st Century Man. OK there’s a lot, the SUITCASE FIRSTLY, and time travel, and things not turning out the way you’d hoped, and being a sad person despite all the great things happening. another song from ELO’s Time (along with Yours Truly 2095 and Hold On Tight) which I love so much.

Got a Lot On My Head. BS is thinking about somebody, could be one of two people but regardless he’s one to obsess over someone he likes. I just had this on my ipod and it fit so.

Lightning Strikes. I had never heard this song until I was on a ride home one day and it came on the radio and I was like HOOOOO WHAT it’s very reminiscent of Back to the Future, more time travel eyy. I wrote down the lyrics while it was on and looked it up later and was like!!! yeah this is great!!

Left to My Own Devices. I saw it on the caption to a of BS edit and had to look it up, and absolutely loved the song. Apparently this is one of the unofficial mtmte soundtrack songs that JRo posted? I didn't know that until like two weeks ago and this track has been in this mix for literally years. Anyway I love it and yeah BS is not gonna conform to norms, why should he? “Left to my own devices” that line is like. boi if time and physics and crap didn’t hold me back I’d totally do my own thing all the time. Actually, screw time, Imma do what I want. But like in a chill way. Like yeah its not that big a deal just. just screw time. also like BS should never be left to his own devices bc have you seen what kinda stuff he invents when he’s under strict rules and supervision I MEAN. BRUH. also got that love angle going again here

Rules Don’t Stop. eyy the artist is We Are Scientists hey! also yeah BS totally doesn’t care about rules, not even the laws of science, physics, time. “Just draw another if you think you’ve crossed a line.” guy doesn’t,, follow rules much. Also I thought I’d just found this song ages ago but turns out that same person who did the other BS edit also did another one with this song and tumblr says I liked it so?? I probably saw that post and looked it up and then forgot where I’d seen it.

Lovers in My Head. Brainstorm really wants his love reciprocated. He’s like, please love me. Please. He longs so hard.

Time Traveler. its!!! more time travel!! and love!!! weird how those two go together. I was SO sure I’d found this song on my own, but I JUST found out AGAIN that that same person who did the other two BS edits ALSO did one with this song. Darnit I thought I was so clever having found these three songs and associated them with Brainstorm but turns out they beat me to the punch. Kudos to you, @berrytron! My memory messed up and I really did think I’d come up with these myself until LITERALLY today. So sorry for using them in my mix if you’re the first person to associate Rules Don’t Stop and Time Traveler with BS. They’re fantastic songs.

Hold on Tight FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS AND DON’T GIVE UP EVEN WHEN YOU'RE FEELING DOWN!!! BRAINSTORM IS THE EMBODIMENT OF THIS SONG HE GOES TO SUCH LENGTHS TO FULFILL HIS DREAMS DESPITE EVERYTHING IT’S SO INSPIRING. also mention of time like. just. just keeping with the theme here

Love Is Like Oxygen HOOOOOOOOOO BOYYYY hhhoohhh I love this song it makes me FEEL things AAAAAAAAAHHHH “love is like oxygen; you get too much you get too high, not enough and you’re gonna die~” I JUST!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH I love it and it fits and I LOVE IT. also you can feel the melancholy. This is my favorite song in the mix. It’s such a good tune, man, I love it.

#oatmealspeaks #blueoatmeal's work #analysis #//#///#Brainstorm #mtmte #transformers #transformers idw #this is messy but hey #it's something #idw spoilers #mtmte spoilers

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theboykingofhell · 7 years ago

Note

9, 15, 16, 18, 26, 31, 32, 34, 41, 42, 45, 46, 47, 49, 51 for TSG, 54 :*

ricky found fucking dead in miami after looking at these PROMPTS,

9. Least favorite trope to write.

what a weirdly phrased question because if i hate it, i ain’t gonna write it... UHH. i really don’t like bringing dead characters back to life???? i don’t like writing scenes for shock horror... well, that’s a lie, i DO like to horrify the reader through my writing, but i don’t want to cheapen the emotional ~journey~ they go through by being like ‘JUST KIDDING! everything actually DOES work out in the end!!’

i have a story where narratively its kind of leading to a place where i have to make a ‘dead’ character come back (chaos actually, since i use her in red’s actual story) and it’s making me so mad like wtf thought we had a deal

15. Where does your inspiration come from?

SONGS... and just insp in general but i get a lot through music and nnnh... there’s just so many good aesthetics and quotes on my dash tbh i’m like constantly and consistently inspired, it’s great

16. Where do you take your motivation from?

imma be honest, the thing that motivates me most sometimes is either reading a rly shitty novel or seeing a shitty show and just getting livid and writing out of spite because THAT DRIVEL WAS PUBLISHED????? MY SHIT IS SO MUCH BETTER WTF... or i think to myself ‘what the fuck, what if i die tomorrow????? with my damn novel unfinished?!?!! HELL NO’... pretty much anything that reminds me that my stuff is Great but no one knows how great it is because it’s not DONE and OUT THERE yet makes me get off my ass

18. What’s your revision or rewriting process like?

depends! for books it mostly just consists of rereading after a long period of ignoring my story and just tweaking lines that seem out of place or that ruin the flow i’m imagining. if i’m rewriting, then i have two word documents out (which the program scrivener makes SO easy god BLESS that program) and just... rewrite it word for word while STARING at the old version. that always makes the prose come out slightly different, it smooths out stuff or lets me cut away or add things i really like and, most importantly, it adds length, which i tend to struggle with a lot because i like just being TO THE POINT

with playwriting though it’s mostly about the format.. i write all plays like i write everything online... in lowercase with little regard to actual grammar. so i gotta actually pretend i give a damn about the english language and format it all properly and add stage directions cuz in a first draft for plays, i always just focus on dialogue and that’s it

26. Standalone or series, and why?

standalones are far more fun and way more satisfying and, quite honestly, require way less fluff. i keep FORGETTING how much fluff is needed in a goddamn novel. MULTIPLE BOOKS OF FLUFF no FUCKING THANKS

31. Hardest character to write.

in the rp: tyler (because he dissociates in a way that literally cuts me off from? any parts of his character? which is like the ESSENCE of his character but it’s VERY unenjoyable to write tbh) and nicki (because i put too much pressure on myself to make her seem a certain way instead of letting it happen naturally)... tbh canon characters and/or characters that are based on people are generally just rly hard sometimes cuz there’s SO MUCH IMAGINED PRESSURE TO MAKE THEM GOOD!!!

in original shit: honestly i’m really tempted to say aaron and that’s just because he’s so... unlikeable to me???? but also i think it’s just because i’ve really only written one scene for him (i always write in order unless a scene is just KICKING MY ASS to write, like this particular scene) and... he seems like a Lot... of annoying bullshit to have to write out lmfao that bitch

32. Easiest character to write.

red because i’ve been writing him for like 7-9 years now, i would hope he’d be easy by now... honestly, really explosive and dramatic characters too like bert or nora come SUPER easy for me, they’re so fun to write (especially dialogue-wise) because they’re very emotional and i can get PARAGRAPHS based on one reaction. characters who try and hide shit from everyone, INCLUDING ME, are so annoying,

34. Handwritten notes or typed notes?

typed because they’re legible,,,,, but then again, my handwritten notes make more sense because they’re kind of fully crafted ideas like ‘***make nisha and aaron meet at 42nd street for transformation chap???’ while a typed note will be like... ‘42nd street+aaron’... what did that mean, ricky-at-5am... why did you do this to us

41. How many stories do you work on at one time?

two... kind of as a minimum, sort of as a maximum... like there’s usually the MAIN story and then there’s something i’m kind of doodling in the side, something that’s just sort of cooking in the backburner that i’m not too serious into the process of it, but it’s goin... i’ve never tried to do 3 stories at a time but i feel like my attention would be too divided and it wouldn’t work

42. How do you figure out your characters looks, personality, etc.

UHH........................................... i’m very fond of faceclaims cuz idk i just kind of... feel how they look... i don’t ever really envision a full person though, i get like traits... i’ll be like... oh she has long black hair and she’s not white and her eyebrows look like this... and then i’ll see a pic of pooja mor and be like THAT’S HER THAT’S EXACTLY IT. idk what it is about eyebrows and why that’s literally always the deciding factor of how a character looks, but there it is

personality just kind of... man, characters just poop out of me, i don’t decide any of this shit wtf jhsfjg

45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.

once someone told me to stop making the boys kiss in the first chapter of my story so i made the boys fuck instead

46. What would your story _______ look like as a tv show or movie?

scrolls WAY up... sees you didn’t add a story as a prompt WELL i’m still riding the tsg train here so

a tsg movie better look like the 90′s, goddamnit.. not like... found footage really, but i want something in the quality to be a little fuzzy and sort of tinted that one kind of grayish brown color i always associate with the 90′s for some reason... like, i can’t stop thinking about all these amber lighting and how dull everything looks, and how higher in quality things look the further and further it goes, like, it’s something i would concentrate a lot on visual cues with because i focus so much of the storytelling of tsg on nisha’s narration. sometimes you don’t know how many days have passed because nisha doesn’t know how many days have passed, if she dissociates, i’d want that shown on camera, if she keeps repeating the same number over and over again, i’d want to watch one little piece of a scene getting repeated again and again. it’d be VERY disorienting as a movie tbh but it’d be fun...

47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story?

characters!!!! plot is such a backburner thing for me, if you have rly great characters, you already have a great plot right there. the plot is just set so i can see how characters react to things, man...

49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end?

THE MIDDLE, FUCK THE MIDDLE.... endings are literally the easiest thing for me, beginnings similarly so, it’s just getting from that BEAUTIFUL starting scene to that GORGEOUS ending that fucking kills my poor undeserving asshole

51. Describe the aesthetic of your story _______ in 5 sentences or words.

low-res pictures of old cemetaries... that’s five words right there, i’m sorry but the END IS IN SIGHT, I’M ALMOST FREE AND CANT BE BOTHERED

54. Any writing advice you want to share?

can’t stress how useful having an insp blog is... creating a story through the unconscious collection of pictures and quotes that just feel relavant is just SO useful not just when it comes to really constructing a character an an atmosphere to your story, but making a fucking plot????? my tsg blog is like my most perfect insp blog because i got the idea to seperate it by chapters, and i’ve found that i can literally just... go into the chapter tags... and make connections and build on plotlines that i had NO IDEA ABOUT when i made or filled those tags, IT’S REALLY FUN and it keeps me inspired to write

#i did not proofread this at all cuz OOP IM DROWNING HERE...#w #mmementommori #ask tag

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abreakfromlove-blog · 8 years ago

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Chp.2

“And we lie together, cry together. I swear to God I hope we fuckin’ die together. And I’ll be loving you forever ‘cause you’re all that I need to get by.”

Sitting up chatting with Rashad about life and other things of mutual substance left Savannah exhausted the following morning. She barely got through work, drinking almost five cups of the strongest coffee she could find in her office. She was the youngest, African American, female law associate at Smith & Gregor LLC. She took pride in her title because she worked her ass off to get there.

The case she had been working on was simple, but tedious and now she was ready to hang it up for the day. She smoothed her hands down her black Hermes Suede and Lambskin leather paneled skirt as she stood from her desk chair. She took off her crème Tom Ford embellished patent leather pumps stuffing them into her bag and sliding her feet into her moccasins shortly after. Throwing the black Alexander Wang Rockie duffel bag over her shoulder and grabbing her black Moncler Moka coat draping it over her arm, she turned the light off in her office and shut the door behind her.

“I’m leaving Scott,” she said walking past his office and tapping his door lightly. He looked up at her from over top of his glasses and smirked, “the queen is leaving the building.” They shared a chuckle and he continued typing on his computer. “I have another case for you tomorrow. It’s an easy win.” She rolled her eyes playfully and spoke louder while walking away, “then why don’t you take it.” Opening the main office door and laughing louder when he responded, “My husband would kill me.” Scott and Gregor Smith were a married couple, and the only homosexual law firm in the D.C., Maryland, and Virginia area. They might have been fruits but they knew there shit, reasons why they were one of the top firms in the area.

She dragged her feet along the marble floors in the hallway before reaching the elevator and pressing the down button. Her phone buzzed and she looked at the name and sighed. Answering it and stepping onto the elevator as the doors slid open. She leaned her back against the wall and waited for him to speak.

“Are you ok baby girl?” She pressed the button for the lobby and sighed, “I’m fine.” There was a long pause between the two of them before he spoke. “How was work today?” Staring at herself in the elevator mirror made her question why she answered in the first place. “It was fine.” She didn’t want to see him let alone talk to him. But something wouldn’t let her hang up the phone. “Are you coming home?” Rolling her eyes and shaking her head, the doors opened and she made her way towards the garage. “For what? Didn’t you say you were done with me?” Pulling her coat closer to her body and searching for her car, she finally found it and pressed the unlock button twice to put everything in her back seat. He kissed his teeth on the other end, while she sat in her driver’s seat and started it up letting the heat circulate throughout it. “Come on Savannah stop bullshittin, just come home I got something for you.” She didn’t care what he had for her to be honest. “I miss you,” his end went silent before he spoke again, “you don’t miss me?” She let out a frustrated breath and the tears built up in her eyes again. She did, but she didn’t want to. “Just please come home.” She hung up the phone and put her car in reverse to exit the garage.

Driving to no specific destination she rolled her eyes when she realized where she had taken herself. She put the code in reluctantly, parked in her assigned parking space, turned her car off and grabbed her purse. She went through the back stairwell and took them all the way up to the fourth floor mentally preparing herself for whatever she was walking into. Putting the key in the lock and twisting the knob at the same time, she opened the door and was immediately irritated when the chain lock was still on. She opened and slammed the door a few times making each one louder than the previous. “Are you fucking kidding me Shane?!?!” He ran towards the door and shut it letting the chain free, before he had a chance to move away from the door she pushed it open again forcefully and he stumbled back a little. “Damn boo,” he said chuckling a little, she rolled her eyes walking past him while he stretched his arm out for a hug and B-lined straight to the bedroom. She stripped out of her work clothes and put on a simple PINK Victoria’s Secret sweat suit. “Sooooo you just gonna ignore me?” he asked coming into the room and sitting on the bed, he lit a blunt that he had already rolled and she shrugged her shoulders.

Pulling a scrunchie off of her wrist, she put her hair up into a high messy ponytail and stood across from him with her arms folded. “You’ve been here all day?” her tone was harsh and distant, he jerked his neck back at her tone but shook it off and looked up at her, blunt in one hand, lighter in the other. “Where else was I going?” He lit the blunt and took a long pull filling his lungs with the drug and exhaling through his nose. “Well shit Shane I don’t know maybe to get a damn job, or hey maybe even a car.”

She was beyond irritated and her sarcastic tone made that clear. He kissed his teeth passing her the blunt, “ummm in case you haven’t noticed I have a job,” he pointed to the safe in the corner of the closet. Savannah snatched the blunt from him going into the kitchen. “Selling drugs is not a job Shane.” He twisted his face following behind her, “since when wasn’t it? It was a job when you ain’t have one and had to get your school shit paid. It was a job when you needed money for the rent, or when your birthday came up and I sent you on that trip. It was a job then.” She raised her eyebrows and took four long pulls of the blunt before putting it in the ash tray for him to get himself. “That was two years ago Shane!” She was tired of hearing the same points thrown in her face every time they talked about him getting a job. “You know what I don’t even feel like arguing with you Savannah, I missed you man. I’m sorry about the way I was acting yesterday, all that shit just threw me off.”

He went into the bedroom and came out with a small gift bag. Looking at him and then at the bag. “I don’t want that,” he rolled his head back irritated with her and handed it to her anyway. “Mannnn I got the shit for you so take it.” She hesitated; taking this gift would be yet another thing he had to throw in her face the next time they argued. She grabbed the bag and opened it up; she smiled a little when she saw the smaller box and opened it. The diamond steel Fendi watch she had had her eye on for a little while now rested in the little blue velvet box. “You like it?” he asked doing a goofy little dance in her direction. She laughed a little and nodded her head, “alright, you tight or whatever.” She mocked the city girl accent and put the watch back in the bag.

He walked up to her and passed her the blunt before wrapping his arms around her tiny frame. “I’m so sorry about everything baby girl.” Nodding her head and pulling from the blunt making her high elevate with each puff. She put the roach in the ash tray and wrapped her arms around his lower back. “You gotta chill out Shane. I can’t keep arguing with you like this, you’re stressing me out over nothing.” She felt the tears form in the corners of her eyes, “you make me cry every day, you’re so mean to me, and at this point I’m beginning to be ok with being without you.” She pulled back from his embrace and wiped her tears lightly to avoid ruining her make up. “You’re so disrespectful Shane. You call me out of my name, you disrespect me to your friends, and you put your hands on me. Why should I put up with that?” he walked closer to her almost afraid to touch her. “I’m sorry baby girl I really am. I hate seeing you cry and it’s never my intention to make you,” she shook her head in disbelief. “But you do! Every fuckin’ day. I can’t deal with the stress anymore, I’ve lost fifteen pounds in the past five weeks ‘cause you’ve been driving me crazy.” She turned toward the pantry and grabbed the Tylenol feeling a migraine form at her temples. “I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t even concentrate at work ‘cause you’re blowing my phone up about some bullshit. And every single time, what do I do huh?” He watched her cry and yell at him, he could see the hurt, the frustration, and anger in her heart. “I come right back to your dumb ass, that’s what I do.” She said poking him in his chest with each word.

Reaching in the fridge she grabbed a bottle of water, popped both pills into her mouth and washed them down. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose massaging it lightly, “I can’t come back to you anymore Shane. The next time we argue I gotta go, for real this time.” That line was tired and overused, she had said that so many times, what made now any different. He dropped his head, he couldn’t even look at her anymore, he felt like this time she actually meant it. “Imma get my shit together Savannah. I promise.” She nodded her head and stared at her feet; walking towards her he picked her head up with his middle finger and kissed her lips lightly. Kissing her caused more tears to fall because she felt that spark; the one she felt when they first met, when she was eighteen. Now five years later she regrets that day.

The kiss grew deeper and he lifted her up onto the marble counter top. She wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck letting him slip his tongue into her mouth. She moaned softly at his gentle finger tips tracing the arch in her back, the same finger tips that were pulling her around like a rag doll less than twenty-four hours ago. Her emotions were all over the place, she was vulnerable right now and he knew it. He took advantage of it every single time. Grabbing her legs and holding them around his waist, he walked her down the hall laying her on the bed gently. Leaning her head back onto the pillow she felt a few tears fall into her ears. He pulled her pants off and crawled on top of her. He kissed her forehead, then her nose, next her lips; he ran his tongue from her earlobe to her neck and planted a few kisses there as well. She moaned lightly, that was her spot. Her back arched automatically and he lifted her sweatshirt up. Placing tiny sweet kisses all over her chest and making tiny circles with his tongue, he was so gentle and so sweet. This was who she fell in love with.

He came face to face with her hot, pink center and placed kisses on her thighs. Biting them lightly she jumped a little, “stop biting me. I don’t like that shit.” She leaned her back into its original position and curled her toes when she felt his tongue on her clit; it sent a wave straight up her spine. “Shit!” she screamed out lightly, he flicked his tongue back and forth rapidly causing her body to shake. Slurping up her juices, and spelling out the alphabet with his tongue made a wave of ecstasy wash over her. Eating pussy had always been his specialty, his sex game never lacked. What they said about ‘ain’t shit niggas’ having the best dick was far from a lie. “Shit baby, right there!” She said unsure of whether she wanted to sit up and watch or lean back and enjoy.

He feasted on her like he was a lion and she was his prey. He wanted to make sure she felt how sorry he was; he wanted her to forget everything that had been going on the last few days. Sticking his tongue deeper into her and gripping her ass he pulled her closer, “uh uh don’t run baby girl.” She placed her hands on the back of his head and shouted in pleasure. He used his fingers to play with her clit while his tongue maneuvered its way in and out of her, “Shit I’m about to cum.” She threw her head back as he sped up his hand movements; clenching her jaw as tight as she could before letting out a satisfied scream. Her juices flowed freely from her body as he continued to play with her clit. Biting down on his lip and he smirked. “You see that shit!” he said proudly not taking his hand from its position, “I just made you squirt. That’s my pussy!” he said aggressively. “Tell me it’s mine!” he said continuing to play with her, “It’s yours!” She screamed out of breath and weak. “It’s mine what?” he removed his hand and slid his Moschino grey tape logo joggers and Ralph Lauren boxer briefs off. His dick sat at full attention as he stared at her trying to catch her breath. “It’s yours daddy.” She finally said rubbing her hands across her face.

He positioned himself right back between her legs, licking his four fingers he wet the tip of his member and slid it into her slowly. Arching her back in pleasure, she immediately clawed her nails into his back. “Fuckkkkk,” he hissed in pleasure as he stroked her slowly. She moaned and bit her lip enjoying the moment. “This my pussy right?” He asked in a demanding tone while holding one of her legs over his shoulder to get a better angle. “Yes daddy,” she shut her eyes tighter as he began to pump in and out of her faster. “That’s right you don’t give my pussy to nobody.” He gripped at her thighs and used his free hand for support as he drove himself deeper into her. She was sure her screams could be heard throughout the apartment but she didn’t care and neither did he. Pushing himself deeper into her each time; he bit his lip focusing on his movements. “Shit girl, that shit feel good.” He threw his head back taking in the moment and shutting his eyes. “Fuck, I’m boutta cum.” He pumped into her faster; she screamed louder and dug her nails deeper into his back. “Shit!” he screamed and released himself inside of her. He fell on top of her gently but breathed heavily. She rubbed his back gently, the two of them catching their breath together, their heart beats in sync with one another. She attempted to sit up as a sign for him to get off of her and when he did his soft member slipped out of her leaving a wet spot on her comforter.

Walking towards the bathroom her mind was blank. It always was after they had sex, he didn’t make love to her anymore he just fucked her. He made her feel like she was just some pussy he couldn’t give up, and felt that way every single time. She started the shower up and wrapped her messy ponytail into a bun giving herself a once over in the mirror and dropped her head. He killed her self-esteem a little more every time they had sex. Making sure the water was the right temperature she stuck her hand in followed by the rest of her. A sense of calm washed over her with each drop of water that hit her skin, she peeked out at him and noticed he was rolling up another blunt, she felt the energy in the room shift but she couldn’t tell if it was negative or positive. She ignored it and enjoyed her shower. Feeling the combination of his and her juices running down her leg made her submerge herself deeper into the water.

She wasn’t on birth control but they never used condoms, and he never pulled out. She wasn’t worried; he smoked so much weed that his sperm count was almost nonexistent. She washed herself fairly quickly but stayed in the comfort of the water not wanting to be around him just yet, or at least not until she caught the vibe. She let a few thoughts cross her mind before finally deciding to turn the shower off. The last thing she needed was to be stuck in her head for the rest of the day. She grabbed her towel and wrapped it around her body, wiping her feet off on the rug. Getting the lotion and deodorant, she made her way back to the room and sat on the bed. He passed her the blunt while he watched her dry her hand off on the towel and take it from him. He looked away from her direction after she took the rolled paper from between his two fingers, both of them sitting with their backs to each other. The vibe was still off to her. He put his head in his hands and rubbed them down his face while letting out a deep sigh.

“What’s the problem?” he always beat around the bush and she was tired of it he either needed to speak his mind up front or leave it be. She passed the blunt back to him and pumped some of the lotion into her hands, she leaned forward and applied it to her legs. He took two deep pulls of the blunt and let the smoke clear his lungs, he took a deep breath and shook his head. “You did fuck that nigga Savannah,” she stopped what she was doing and shook her head. Chuckling in disbelief she got up and walked towards her drawer to immediately put some clothes on. “Un-fucking-believable,” was all she said while she slipped into a pair of boy shorts. “You don’t have to lie bruh, that shit feel different. I can tell,” he said rolling his eyes and standing up from off of the bed.

She didn’t even want to say anything, she just continued to get dressed wanting to get out of there before he got violent. “Exactly, that’s why you quiet.” she put a bra on and the same sweat suit that she had just taken off. Every time she moved he was right behind her. She whipped herself around quickly causing him to bump into her, “WHAT?!” She shouted, he jerked his neck back and laughed a little, “so wassup? You fucked that nigga?” She folded her arms across her chest and shook her head with a clear attitude. “NO! What the fuck do I really look like having sex with one nigga and turning around to fuck another one? That’s some hoe ass shit!” She yelled and brushed her hair into a high ponytail and braiding it down. “I wouldn’t put it past you,” she turned around and pushed him into the door with all the strength she could find and walked out of the bathroom. “Nigga you got me fucked up!” she grabbed her purse, “don’t put your fuckin’ hands on me Savannah.” He spoke through clenched teeth, and balled both of his fists following behind her.

She walked into the kitchen and looked around for her keys. He came around the corner and snatched her purse from her, “The fuck you think you going?” He held his arm out to block her from getting her purse as she reached for it. “Give me my purse Shane!” He pushed her back and she lunged for it again, “you going back to see that nigga and fuck him again?” She went to grab for the purse again before he pushed her back making her fall into the stove, he came over top of her and she got defensive and scared. She began to kick and punch at him not sure what he was going to do while he hovered over top of her. “Stop fuckin’ hitting me young!” He stayed over top of her. More tears fell clouding her view and the anger in her started to rise. “Get off of me!” She shouted. She wouldn’t stop kicking and punching at him at least not until he got from on top of her, “get off of me!” she shouted again but none of her blows were connecting and her requests went unnoticed. “I said stop hitting me!” He swung his fist at her and she felt it connect with her left cheek. She screamed in pain, and attempted to crawl backwards around the island on the kitchen floor. “Shit,” he dropped the purse and bent down trying to console her, “I’m sorry Savannah I didn’t mean to hit you.” Terrified, she continued to crawl away from him. She used the island counter to help her get to her feet. Grabbing her purse, and stuffing her keys and phone inside of it she went to leave out of the apartment. Her vision was blurry from her tears, her ear was ringing, and her head was pounding like nothing she’d ever felt. He grabbed her arms gently, “I didn’t mean to Sav. Please, I’m sorry.”

“GET OUT OF MY WAY SHANE!” She tried her best to get around him but he wouldn’t let her. “MOVE!” there was no way around him, “come on baby please don’t leave I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hit you.” He continued to hold her arms and was slightly yelling in her face, frustrated with her but more so with himself. “JUST MOVE SHANE!” She backed him up into a wall and he let go of her. She ran for the front door and unlocked it finally getting out of it. He followed after her, “Savannah please!” he was calling out for her while she ran down the hall, she didn’t say anything nor did she look back. She tried her best to focus on the ground to see where she was going while the neighbors started to peek out of their doors to see what all the commotion was, when they heard all the noise.

She kept her head low, and focused on her destination. She finally made it to the stairwell; she looked back and saw he was stuck behind the neighbors who had blocked him from running after her. She ran down the stairs as fast as she could and got to the garage. Practically sprinting to her car, she hit the button on the driver’s side door handle to unlock it. She heard her phone vibrate and knew immediately who it was, she pulled it out of her purse and cut it off. Wiping her face she took a few deep breaths to try to calm herself down as best as she could, but she didn’t wait too long because he’d be down in the garage shortly if she stalled. She started it up and made her way to the familiar destination.

The drive was difficult; she could barely see, her face was throbbing, and the situation replayed itself over and over in her head making her more emotional each time. She pulled into the driveway crooked, and shut the car off. Leaving her purse behind not bothering to lock the doors, she banged on the door a few times knowing her presence wasn’t expected. She didn’t call before she showed up, she didn’t even know if he was there but she hoped he was. She banged again. A few moments later she heard the locks click she kept her head down until he opened the door. “Sav-,” as soon as she heard his voice she looked up and he jerked his neck back and twisted his face. “That nigga hit you savannah?!” he grabbed her gently pulling her into his home and holding her tightly. He rubbed her head gently in the direction of her ponytail. He didn’t want to let her go, he felt like he was to blame. He was supposed to protect her from things like this and he felt like he failed. He rocked her back and forth rubbing her back, she sobbed into his shoulder not wanting him to ever let her go. “It’s ok baby girl. I got you now.”

He shut the door locking it behind them; he held her hand and walked her towards the living room. “Go sit down,” he said pointing to the couch. She did as she was told and sat in the corner of the couch. Kicking her shoes off, she bought her knees into her chest and wiped the tears from her face. She hissed in pain when she touched her left check and felt the slight knot that had begun to form.

He slid on his socks across the kitchen floor and into the living room with a baggie full of ice cubes. Sitting down next to her he laid her head in his lap and gently held the ice pack on her face to help reduce the swelling and making sure that it wouldn’t create a nasty bruise in the morning. Undoing her braid and taking her ponytail out, he ran his fingers through her hair as they sat in silence, not an awkward one; a comfortable one. One that they both needed. She sniffled every now and again, wiping her face after each one and adjusting herself a little. He didn’t want to make her talk, and he wouldn’t. He knew she had a lot on her mind right now and whenever she was ready she would let him in.

Stroking through her hair gently, his heart broke for her; such a beautiful individual that was mentally broken. He knew her before Shane, and he knew when she finally decided to leave him he would still be there for her afterwards. Except this time around it would be him showing her how she should be treated. He just didn’t know when that time would come, it had been five long years and here he was still waiting while she was still going through the same things. Maybe this was what she wanted; maybe this was the type of relationship that satisfied her. He shook those thoughts as quickly as they entered his mind, nah that wasn’t it. She just fell in love with who he used to be, and when he turned into who he is now she wanted to believe that this was a phase that he would grow out of. But in reality this was who he was and the man that she met was the one pretending to be something he wasn’t.

Rashad leaned his head back and thought back to when she first started talking about him. He was always buying her things, taking her on trips, doing whatever she needed. He supported her, genuinely cared about her, and was the man that she actually needed. He wouldn’t lie he was jealous of their relationship at first, it was supposed to be him. But Rashad wasn’t ready for that type of commitment and neither was she, she was so young. That was how their relationship shattered, they were moving too fast. The more time she and Shane had spent together the deeper she fell, until he showed his true colors.

But by then he had run everybody out of her life so that she didn’t have anyone to turn too but him, or at least that’s what he made her believe. Rashad sat back and watched Shane break her slowly until she was solely dependent on him. She lost her job, she began to fall behind in school, she just wanted to be about Shane all day, because he had fed her the bullshit that that was all she needed to worry about; being his woman. She would talk about him like he was God, and he was, he was her God.

He heard light snores coming from her lips and looked down at her smirking a little. He lifted her head up lightly and laid it back down gently making sure that he didn’t wake her. Walking towards an antique chest he had in the corner of the living room, he opened the top and grabbed a blanket, laying it over her. He sat on the couch opposite of the one she laid on and turned the TV on. He didn’t really care to watch anything but he wasn’t letting her leave his sight. Looking over at the clock he took note of the time, 9:38pm. He made a promise to himself while he watched her sleep peacefully. “I swear I will not let him or anyone else hurt you baby girl, that’s on everything.” He watched her for a little while longer before he ended up falling asleep himself.

#urbanfanfiction #rihanna #drake #fanfiction

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esfor-dazrumi-18 · 5 years ago

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findings

y’know it says a lot when it tries so hard to look like fucking twitter and the like where it’s all tiny and stuff

moment you join too you’re forced to pick tags so they can cater to ya i just picked the obvious shit

tbh i don’t like being tracked but i got shit to say so i’ll get on with it.

i don’t follow the rules other people set out, i make my own, so don’t whine this is long or shit, y’all learn to read in school for a reason, bookmark it or something, heck, read and then stop, ain’t my fault it’s your own disinterest

was following this guy named bogor. been helping out some girl with her problems, various things on the net she can’t confront due to various issues, associations, internets a nasty place yo so me and a few friends go around doing the work and the eyes for em

we’re not on the internet much, we’re just people with a close attachment to each other, so dont expect to see all your picture pic stuff, that ain’t our thing here, i just looked up blogging sites n tumblr was in the list so i’ll treat it as that

despite we aren’t on the internet much, we got a basic grasp how these things go.

so then

my situation, as esfor, is, wow, hecked up. Didn’t realise someone else here chose the same name oh well that’s what i did for google. but never mind. Me and a friend, puni, who’s looking up places like gbatemp are searchin the web all fine n dandy and then I get asked by our girl ‘there’s this suspicious forum can u look into it’

so puni goes into this forum and fucks up first impressions, so then i go in. there’s a guy named bogor who runs the place and holy fuck he’s nuts. like not even slightly, this dude’s inferior complex is bigger than you’ll ever know

so the reason we were asked to inspect some suspicious looking forum was because this concerns her finances. It runs on the assumption that this program this girl’s mum has signed up to is a scam, been running for 20 years with slow increments to givin cash. Loads of cash, sounds like blatant scam material, but the site’s materials are a decade old, and this guy seems hell bent on controlling that material as well.

Finances ain’t a joke, neither are scams. So as a friend i decide to be cover. puni fucked up the first impressions, indicating she wasn’t gonna lurk so I had to take measures. some other guy comes in who we don’t know, and after many logic tossups with admittedly little material on my end, this guy takes drastic measures threatening his family, and i don’t agree with the threatening the family bit, but i agree with the post in an admittedly vague way, and then he bans both our asses.

So then I can’t speak, puni and peli (another dude, more rude than me or puni if i’m being honest) make an account called muzifa to lurk. this time, we say nothing until yesterday

this suspicious forum doesn’t attract much activity, there’s only a few hundred members on the forum, suspiciously, though, they don’t get active on the site much. ever since both of us got suspended, your email gets verified, which is fine, our emails are gibberish anyway irrelevant to the names we choose (except the one on this site), but yea, despite this, there’s like 1 or 2 members that even speak at that. the forum’s running in mybb.

which is obvious, i lurk another forum infrequently which uses the exact same format so i’m not particularly unknown

when i say i’m not in the internet that’s more a lie. i have twitter, i have nowhere else though. i lurk more quiet places. no facebook, no insta, no shit. just twitter to converse about problems with the other dudes (or girls in the cases of our friend and puni), so i know this shit, i just don’t take myself to care about much of the spammy promote-yourself shit.

basically, the gist of the forum is this program is run by a guy named mike, who’s supposedly an immigrant as we’ve half-learned, and yo, he posts updates every 2 weeks basically drunk. this bogor bitch posts said updates in text on the forum, and reacts to em callin mike names and shit, and he expects everyone to go along with it. puni on muzifa’s account got too heated, because bogor went all authoritarian on him too, but here’s the logic tho

mike got contacted in one of these updates and he posted the email addresses of all involved. some of these emails mention a jeff.

so there’s a whole team behind this scam... huh interesting a whole team

yet bogor goes ‘there’s no team, just mike’ which dang dun lines up with the suspicions from our source. sure, teams can be involved in scams, no denying there. but use your words: a team is comprised of more than one person. so if bogor claims to have inside info, how come he’s sure there’s no ‘team’ if there’s a jeff? is jeff some personality? but then why’re the emails mentioning jeff and mike as if they’re separate?

and mike’s drunk updates refer to himself as mike at the end of every one. if he wanted to fake out by being jeff, he’d be jeff. so if he’s getting shit from jeff, who’s a different person, ergo, there’s a team. 2 people sure, but that’s still a team. there’s no i in team.

there isn’t a response to this, and as well, this lot also fuck up forum formatting because usually on these forums there’s tags to tell you when the reply ends if you’re responding to a quoted post, that’s how the text after isn’t stuck in the blob, but this lot like the 40 yr olds they are continue writing in this field. i’m not that old i can’t clearly see when the field ends

so bogus then bands muzifa with warnings that as peli tells us he’s blocked from seeing because the site totally blocks him from doing anything, apparently reading your own private messages is a warning. puni then goes back with her permanent account, with words from me in twitter as to what constitutes a response, and despite this, even she’s blocked, for supposedly 2 weeks. peli gets on with a different email, but the account is blocked instantly. so it’s not even a matter of 2 weeks, peli was blocked on sight.

so why care so much about an admin on a suspicious site, why not just leave it alone?

well first up, this scam hasn’t coughed itself up so the site has some merit

we received some emails pointing to two instances happening at once. the one with mike in charge, and one suspiciously pointing to bogor (including a recent update from mike himself claiming bogor is behind the crappy shit), along with a gmail account called ‘vsb-trust’ that supposedly said payment is happening, but only if $200 per member were sent. Since the girl involved in this is young, that’s $400.

we also found in this decade old site that’s suspiciously not on the frontloaded site he keeps pointing to (bogor loves to say google looking his name only results in scams, but all of them are a decade-old or dead in the case of the old forum), a letter containing something from the authority with some bogus claim he got evidence they don’t have

it’s like if he were being honest he’d have sent it right then and now why put this out to the publi-

oh right

he then asks for 50 grand from everyone to give this evidence to the authority.

Suspiciously in this forum, the one where he asked 200 from everyone also is never mentioned, despite it, y’know, supposedly being under mike’s name.

even though it ain’t according to these old emails

so basically both are scams and i’d like if we could change google’s history so we ain’t painting it as so one-sided

what the fuck 50 grand to send evidence about a criminal like fuckin wow i’m pretty sure your singaporean woman had better things to do than entertain a fuckin coward

because it’s obvious, set up a forum that really should’ve been a blog (he had no money for a blog), people join to echo chamber (just like actual scams, the replies usually aren’t real especially if they’re a pic), and then they lure u in, simple as that

because we try arguing with logic against the points, not that we dont agree, just the logic’s all fucked up, but nah, heck it

idk what the fuck to do with this tumblr now i think imma chill it

but i’ll still be spittin on tumblr

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