#But I'd also like to decide WHEN I wanna work on it!
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atta boy show
i wanted to share my experience meeting lewis and the gang. the night was an absolute dream. it’s lengthy so it’s under a read more.
first of all the show was phenomenal. the opener, me like bees, was fantastic and i’ve been listening to them nonstop since last night. plus atta boy’s set was so good, of course. when they walked off at the end everyone started chanting for one more song so they came back to play another one (i will post the video later) and as they were getting ready to play lewis was snapping pics of eden and freddy with his film camera, very endearing lol.
so leading up to the show i decided i was going to make coasters for all of the band members. so i made one for each with their names on them, the date of the show, and my city's skyline. first i gave aubrey hers. she loved it. and she is darling! such a kind, sweet, beautiful girl! i told her how much i loved how she played and that she was beautiful, and she was just so touched.
then i gave dashel his. he got so animated about it and he asked me all the details about how i made it. he is truly so wonderful and kind, like his energy is just infectious and he's so lovely. and very attentive! a few people had fainting issues in the crowd and if they were close by he made sure to check on them, and offer help if needed. genuinely angelic human.
then of course miss eden! i didn't get to talk to her as long as i wanted to because they were packing up and i didn't wanna interrupt, but i gave her the coaster and she was so excited. plus i also put together a bag full of snacks and goodies for the gang to share on the road home and she loved it, she kept thanking me and ugh she's just so darling! like i mentioned above a few people fainted in the crowd and she stopped the show each time to make sure they were taken care of, and made sure to be encouraging and keep everyone calm.
i also wanna shout out luke shaefer, the lead singer of me like bees. he jumped right into action every time someone needed help. after their set a girl near me was having an asthma attack and he gave her water and had her sit down on the stage. and then he ran to the aid of someone who fainted. truly the most genuine, kind person. i got to talk to him for like 15 minutes straight after the show, and just vibe with him. he is AMAZING. and their music is so fucking good. their set was so loud my ears were still ringing, but so worth the ear pain lol. i will def be listening to them all the time now!
then of course freddy. i also didn't get to talk to him as much as i wanted because they were packing up but i stopped him to give him his coaster. he LIT UP and said "this is the sweetest gift i've ever been given." and then asked me if i was okay with a hug (of course i was). he was just so kind and gracious and energetic. god i love him. he is so cute to watch on stage too. he's got such a good aura about him.
and without further adieu, that brings me to our beloved lew magoo 😉
i thought for sure i'd be nervous and awkward but i am proud to say i stared him down just as hard as he was staring me down lol. also i was really extra and went a bit overboard with my presents for him. i touched his arm and was like "so i have a lot of presents for you...i am so sorry" and he was like "oh let's go over here where there's more space!" and led me over to the stage. then i went on my spiel. i of course gave him his coaster. he loved it, and at first he was like "omg is this a cookie?" (i packaged them in little goodie bags) and i was like sir! that is a coaster, please do not eat it. and he just thought it was so cool and asked how i made it. and he was like “this is the beginning of my coaster collection!” let me tell you, all the painstaking work i did on those coasters made that moment all worth it.
then, i got him a set of pens that look like drumsticks. he was so excited and was like "oh i've been looking for new pens! these are insanely cool!" but it didn't end there. the last thing i got him was a brand new mack hat. i told him i heard that his old one bit the dust (he was wearing it as we spoke, it just didn't have the patch) and that i went looking for a new one. and i presented it to him and his FACE. he was like 😱 and no joke, he started tearing up. and then he immediately put it on. i asked him if i could take a picture of him wearing it so he happily posed for me, and then he insisted i take another picture of him pointing at the hat (i may share the pics on my blog. i may not. we shall see. they are so special to me. mooties will definitely get to see the pics, i promise) and he was just ecstatic. i think he gave me a hug? but i honestly do not remember lol, i blacked out at the end. i did get pics with him though, which he took himself. and he went "the mack is back!" 😭
he is just as kind and gracious as everyone says he is. meeting him was unreal. i'm so glad i had the opportunity and i wouldn't trade it for the world. the show was such a surreal and beautiful experience. i met several new friends as well as a few tumblr girlies and we just all vibed and had such a great time. i hope atta boy tours again soon and that more people get a chance to interact with these incredible people. they deserve all the love and success and i hope they have a long and prosperous career together as a band, and that they're able to flourish in their own personal ventures as well.
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Negaverse Megavolt concept!
Design notes and personality rant stuff under the cut. Warning. It's long and unreadable.
The purse thing is a generator (Ill probably design it as a prop at some point considering It does NOT look like one but portable generators are hard for me to draw for some reason)
I swapped which eye has the white in it (even though I usually draw it on the wrong side anyway bc idk my lefts from rights..)
I wanted to make the darks very prominent bc the yellows are very prominent in the original
I went with blues bc it's the only other colour usually associated with lightning and electricity.
The teal parts of his outfit are lights! They glow when he's fully charged and fade out when he's out of power.
You can't see it in this pose but his hands have outlets on the back that work the same as megavolt's chest outlet. He can power weapons with them and charge himself without the pain of straight up shocking himself
I wanted to make his hair look like it's thinning out bc of age and repeated electrical damage but I wasn't sure how to do that so it's not really present. Did give him some white hair though.
His glasses are prescription! Can't see nothin without em..
Okay now some personality stuff!
Megavolt is the hardest villain to swap bc his personality is "insane guy with memory issues but is smart" and it's kinda hard to flip that around without just making him boring? Removing his intelligence when it comes to electricity would also negate his whole gimmick which makes things worse. but I do have a few ideas. It's ironic I struggle with him so much considering he's literally my favourite character...
He was popular in high school. He was friends with negaduck and they were both pretty well liked jock types before negaduck started doing major crimes (though I imagine he was always a delinquent of sorts. Just didn't start destroying the city till he graduated) clash reunion is a whole beast on it's own bc megavolt has the most in depth backstory which means a lot of reworking for a personality swap au.
His interests, like dw's megavolt, lie in magnesium, electronics, and engineering. The difference is, despite being Intruiged by these subjects, he didn't go out of his way to learn about the. He was more focused on his peers approval back then. Not to mention the fact that negaduck was an extremely toxic friend and would absolutely make fun of him constantly for it. (He doesn't even actually care, he's just an asshole.)
Eventually after gaining his abilities he began to study electricity and start inventing things. Only.. He's pretty bad at it. Things tend to backfire on him. Quackerjack has a lot more experience than him when it comes to engineering and he tries to help him out but the guy's kinda cursed. I haven't really decided if it's more dt17 gyro where everything he makes ends up turning against him or guy am I from the Netflix green eggs and ham show where everything he makes just kinda explodes. Maybe a bit of both. Either way it's very over the top and is more trouble than it's worth, but that doesn't stop him! (Oh God someone stop him)
I didn't wanna just take away his mental issues completely because the opposite of that is literally nothing. It adds.. Nothing. It just gives him less to work with. And it's already hard enough to do this guy. (Plus it kinda implies mentally ill people can't be heroes and that's.. Mm....) So instead I decided to change how he reacts to it.
He still has memory issues along with other physical and mental symptoms of electrical injury, he just really likes to pretend he doesn't. He completely ignores his deteriorating mental, physical, and emotional health <33
I wanna flesh him out more but I'd only be able to do that if I write with him and I'm fantastic at procrastinating my writing projects <33
#digital art#art#drawing#negaverse#megavolt dwd#negaverse megavolt#fanart#dwd91#dwd fanart#megavolt#dwd#redesign#fan design#i kinda avoid saying negaducks real name in the parts where I talk about them in high school bc idk if it would be the same as DW or not
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3tanniversary survey audio answers: ep. 1 | transcript below the cut
[ 241107 ] Hey everyone and welcome to episode one of 3 years with 3tan audio replies.
The first question we have - again, the question is "if you were given time to sit down and talk with me as the author, what would you want to talk about and or do?" First person - it is anonymous - they said, "I'd probably ask for writing advice and want all the details of how you came up with 3tan and also talk about life and whatnot."
That's awesome. I mean, I, I love talking about life, love talking about pretty much anything. I'm a yapper (laughs) sometimes and sometimes I just sit there and listen. It really depends.
But! How I came up with 3tan, I mean. I get this one quite a lot, but it started when I took inspiration from one of my favorite scenes from one of my favorite fanfics. But I definitely wanted to put my own spin on it, right? Like I was definitely not going to copy it entirely because we all know (laughs) that's a no-no, but I did want to reimagine it and put my own little.. tangerine in it (laughs) and then imagine it with Yoongi. But also throwing in that brother's best friend trope because I wanted to explore that with him in general.
And honestly from there it took a life of its own. Completely took a life of its own, nothing else is even remotely close to what that original fanfic was about and they really did take on their own personalities, they all took on their own environment, everything just started - just started flowing. And of course from there I left it as open-ended as possible, that way if these characters decided to come back to me with more, they had more to say, then I was down with it.
And then the second question is, "how do you write your characters' emotions and descriptions so well? I'm very curious about that. Every time I read your [stories] I can feel the emotions deep in my soul and it makes me feel like I'm part of the story as a reader." That is amazing feedback. Thank you.
As far as writing characters' emotions and descriptions, I think I'd have to draw this out, but. Essentially, like let's say you're shooting a movie scene. You have a lead or you have two leads, whatever, right? But then you also have a director, but then you also have camera operators, most likely more than one, and you're switching between those two.
I'm. I put myself in every position. So one moment, I'm the main lead. One moment I'm a camera operator on their right, and then the second - and the next moment - I'm the director looking at everything.
That's why there's so many cuts, I would say. So many beats, those small paragraphs, because everything is like a snapshot basically. And that's how I go about my descriptions.
And then as far as emotions, I'm in it. Like I am in that scene, whatever it is with these people. And it's tough. It really is.
And I know other writers out there will know exactly what i'm talking about. You take on these emotions too when you're writing them. You're attached to them, and it does a number on you, it really does.
That's why.. That's why we definitely need breaks after working on a piece and even posting the piece. Like you got all those emotions on paper and you're releasing it to the world for everyone to see and it's nerve-racking, but it's rewarding at the same time when people really connect with it.
So, yeah!
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wanna submit your own? you can fill out the survey above or just send in an ask!
#woohoo episode 1!#*ryenfictalk#*ryenfm#3tanniversary#3tanaudioreplies#3tanextras#3yearswith3tan#also 4 minutes wow
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I just love™ doing a collab event where I'm supposed to draw something for a fanfiction, but the writer won't share or write anything until the 3rd or 4th check-in at all.
If one doesn't have the time for it, they shouldn't participate.
Or at least they should communicate!
Artists have a schedule, too!
No writing, no art! We artists, too, need some time for a decent artwork and this is not my only project! Dx
#Yeah. There is time to finish everything till August. 2 months are more than enough to draw a decent piece.#But I'd also like to decide WHEN I wanna work on it!#The writers have nearly half a year if not more! The collab with artists started in April.#It's June now! And all I got are 3 sentences that are supposed to be a summary.#I'll don't even want to draw for this person's fic anymore. So now I hope they won't write till the end of june.#In my last check in I already stated that I'll drop out of this collab if there won't be any major update till the end of june.#Seriously. This isn't even a collab. It's a 'yey! I'll get a free drawing for my fanfiction' - event.#And the audacity to ask for the schedule that's stated in the rules to see if they still could pull a one-nighter somewhen later.#At this rate I might not pop out of it and rather show a pic of 2 stick figures dancing for the final submission.#If the writer didn't leave me time for more... 👀#les me has spoken
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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Not to yuck anyone's yum here, but I don't see how someone can do meta if they don't even have basic reading comprehension, much less do surface level critical analysis that says anything of substance.
#truly is the piss on the poor website#it has nothing to do with his morality or the ethics of his actions btw it's irrelevant to actual point being discussed#which is ''you keep using that word. i dont think it means what you think it means''#just because someone on xitter with 25k followers said it doesn't make it true#you know what i should just fic it to illustrate the difference then link to anyone who says otherwise#I'm increasingly tired kinda hard to curate your experience when the whole damn fandom's gone crazy#cultural hegemony go brrr#feel like it's time to ramble on because i'd literally have to block everyone to stop seeing stupid takes#sometimes i wanna make a powerpoint about diegesis and make people take a test on it#but alas that's not how fandom works#and it's not like it's limited to this fandom either#i noped out of my fav character's tag with six new people on my block list when i decided to touch bases in a previous fandom#and in this one it's even more infuriating because it's literally just a ship war#if it's unethical towards her it's also unethical towards partner of choice#like the person that called ks healthy before the reveal#in what universe is attempting to kill each other healthy
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📓🕯️🐇🖤pt.2
#only 30 tags lol i ran out... so furthermore#we only get one life. im gonna try as much as i can to enjoy the little moments. nd to not give up on myself nd my life#i will die one day anyway. why rush it. i'll enjoy as many books and as many walks and songs and tv shows as possible#if i get a loan nd have more money i wanna bleach my hair nd dye my hair green#and later this year i think i might change my name#it was the name i wanted to change to from the beginning. but i was in such a bad headspace i just picked eden at random#i do kinda like it now nd im attached to it but i more feel like this other name actually is me. my birth name nd my current name dont feel#really right. so maybe. i havent decided yet. like i rlly dont know. im also attached to this name for some other reason. like it's who i am#to a person i rlly like and if i change... will i be anything to them? i cant put it into words but that makes me hesitate#but it's unhealthy to stay attached to someone i cant truly have even if i want to. so i mean. idk im just weird abt it#but i do kinda wanna change my name (to embla. my mom wanted to give me that name but my dad was like nooo >.<) i am not 100% sure tho so#when i've been getting used to going to school nd working out at the gym. nd after my surgery nd i have more energy#i will try to face my avpd and try apps for making friends. there r two apps where u can find new girl friends!! maybe i can try that#also like i've never tried apps but i think maaaaaybe i can use bumble to try to find friends and women to date. potentially. idk.....#rn it's hard for me to think in those terms bc. i mean i am hung up on someone!!!! i cant evwn imagine dating or being intimate w anyone els#sometimes i feel like.. they're the only person i've ever felt like it'd even be possible. who i'd event want to do that w#not only physically but emotionally. so ig it's even harder to let go bc im so scared i will never feel like that w anyone else#but i rlly need to try to make the most of whatever life i have. the world will collapse soon anyway#that makes me even more sad that i cant be w who i wanna be w nd do what i wanna do but#all pain will all be completely descimated eventually. it's not forever bc life isnt forever#i've just never felt this before. like i want smth to be real so bad but if it happened once surely it can happen again? right?#i wont spend my life alone without intimacy and love and comfort nd support nd understanding right???? :o hope not#im still so sad nd exhausted rn. nothing in my life is working nd theres no repreive nd no help#it gets sooo hard to endure everything sometimes when everything just keeps piling up and gets so heavy it feels like im drowning#nd atm i dont feel like i have any anchor. nothing that keeps me grounded nd im just floating away nd im constantly being overwhelmed by my#feelings nd emotions. im like a stupid little kid who dont understand how to handle what im feeling. or make rational decisions#i feel so ... stupid and useless. i dont know what im doing. i have no idea. i have no compass. its so scary
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okay I am watching D20 - Neverafter for the first time and there are fanfics where snowwhite, cinderella and sleeping beauty are in a polyamorous relationship right? There are fanfics of then going through the horrors of wakeing up in their stories over and over again. In the beginning always with a memory loss and that feeling of something being off. Between the magic and the destined love it's like a cold wind blowing through the cracks of reality.
Wakeing up to reunite with their true love. Not their destined one but the one they chose each day they had the freedom to. The ache of knowing they will be seperated again. Probably forgetting again.
The memories pileing up, the princesses holding onto their memories until they can't forget anymore. but still they have to play along with a story outside of their hands until they snap. And the first fairy ends up with a glas shard in her chest and the princess breaks free.. hopefully for good.
And then them waiting for sleeping beauty. Searching for her desperately only to find she died and she forgot everything they shared. Talking about a prince and having to hold back when all you wanna do is wrap her in your arms. Telling her about how snow white learned alot of magic since she broke free (don't you remember? how she tought you your first spells please remember) and argh
PLEASE TELL ME THERE IS A STORY FOR THAT
#d20#d20 neverafter#sleeping beauty#here me out#i am only at episode three#so this is their first interaction with each other#but the vibes in this conversation are killing me#the way cinderella talks about these stories#“the fairies want them a certain way”#yeah yeah they want that#i felt normal and intriqued by the neverafter story and now i wanna bite into something#and shake it to pieces like a feral animal#i'd find you in each universe#I'd love you in each universe#it's of knowing that living#really choosing to live is work and knowing that loving someone is also work#belonging together is not destiny it's a chain that connects you both that you smith and craft and carve out of a simple threat#it's a work of love and everytime you decide to love them because and in spite and regardless of whatever it becomes a little stronger#because even when you think loving them is as natural as breathing it's still a decision and promise you made and remake everyday by choice#and sometimes it really is work to make the pieces of the chain fit together#sometimes they clash and sometimes they come out shaped funny and not alltogether structuraly sound#but that makes it unqie and that makes it you and the chain that connects you is a piece of art you craft together#I need to be put down like a dog
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Going to work today
#I can barely walk it hurts so bad#and I already messaged my boss and coworker that I'll work from home bc well. what am I supposed to do when I literally can't WALK to work..#my father said it's too “risky” to stay at home bc I've only been working there for half a year and that they won't believe me (??)#so NOW his plan is that I basically crawl to work so that everyone can see I'm “actually” sick and go home#like sure. and my coworker definitely won't think there's something wrong with me showing up after saying I'm staying home#they're all gonna think I'm fucking weird 😭#the way you can also see that I've been crying the entire night and got like 3 hours of sleep#I hate this household I'd say I wanna run into incoming traffic but I can't even so that LOL#also also#if you're asking why I - as a 20 yo - can't decide what to do on my own.. good luck trying to argue with immigrant parents abt literally#anything#someone just take me out thank you
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I wanna be an artist so bad bro what am i doing in college
#during the oral exam the eng prof asked me ''why am i even in college?'' (his usual)#and i was like. genuinely thought to myself ''i'm here bc i have to be.''#like when teachers tell you high school isn't mandatory or when you think college isn't mandatorx#by law? sure. but am i gonna find a job without a higher education? in this economy not even a doctorate would help much#i HAVE TO study something and languages are smth i'd be the least suicidal ab studying#but i want to be. a creative.#i also wanna create unsettling art but that is so much easier with auditory and visual mediums...#but... i'll do my best#i'm an artist which means i can do whatever i want it's all in my hands#if i work hard enough and practice i can write truly unsettling things#i can bring the uncanny valley in words i can use the kafkaesque atmosphere i can present weird things as if they're normal#and make it unsettling both in what's portrayed and HOW it's portrayed#i have two novel wips but i think rather than novels i'm better suited for short stories for anthologies for collections#i'm still exploring and getting to know myself as a writer#it makes me a bit sad and disappointed in myself because it's been about a decade since i thought ''this is my calling''#but i just recently decided horror is what i want to write and i can#not help but also feel joyful and happy about the fact that i'm still finding myself#and that i'm still evolving as a writer and that there are probably still so many things i have yet to find out about my art#but for now. [thru tears and gritted teeth] i am writing a dictionary#but even this ! i am expanding my vocabulary which will help my art :]
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.
#*checks notes* so I haven't posted in like over a year#long time no see lol#everything's fine I just got caught up in school and work and stuff#I wanna start being active again#but like more chill this time#cause when I was active before I'd put a lot of pressure on myself to stay in the loop on everything#and post original stuff#but I've decided to be kinder to myself and use this platform to just relax#use it in bits and pieces with reblogging stuff maybe make a shit post every now and then#the alternative to being on here is me doomscrolling on the fucking youtube homepage of all places and I don't wanna live like that anymore#fhdsafhdsj#I'm also going to broaden my blog a little#I'll still post stuff about cats of course but there will be more of other stuff#I can't keep making sideblogs and then proceeding to not be active on them fhdjfhds#I am sad that I've been gone for so long though cause some of my mutuals aren't active anymore :(#or have migrated to a new blog but I don't know the new blog :(#oh well#I will simply carry on#me stuff#my posts
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I decided I'm taking the L and applying for the car part assembly place that my former neighbor works at cause A) she can vouch for me which increases my chances of actually getting it, B) all the places I actually wanted to work at either aren't hiring or never got back to me but this place is always hiring, and C) it's full-time and pays $17.75 an hour and I've looked at the rent prices for nearby apartments and calculated that with that pay I should be able to move out in about a year give or take so even though I won't enjoy it it'll be worth it in the long run.
#i also decided recently that freelance graphic artist is the career path i wanna take#so while i'm working there i'm gonna look for a good online graphic design course i can take#and then maybe while i'm at it i'll finally learn how to do digital art#and then i can actually start using my deviantart account and take commissions#y'know to make some extra money on the side#and then eventually when i get all that off the ground i can find an apartment over in kansas city and move there cause blue springs sucks#this is like the first time in my life i've actually had a long-term game plan for the foreseeable future so hopefully it actually works ou#but yeah the evening shift at this car place is from 2 pm to 10 pm#so i'm gonna find one of those online courses where you can do everything at your own pace#so that way i can do that in the mornings and work in the afternoons#also i'd be able to keep a consistent gym schedule#cause i could go to the gym early in the morning#i prefer going to the gym like as soon as it opens cause that's when it's the least crowded#so yeah fingers crossed all this shit goes according to plan i guess#former neighbor gave me a number to call some lady but obviously i'll have to wait til monday for that#cause she definitely won't be there on the weekend#shut up tristan
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tempted to redesign Tae [ the oc/sona thang in my pinned post over on main ] again to have more piercings and maybe some tattoos and just use her as a gender goalpost LOL
#i USE to look like what tae currently looks like#but rn i have a mullet instead of the long sideburns#which i'm growing back out. autism wants link hair again !!#and otherwise i just want more body mods lol#i REALLY want a bridge piercing .. giving vio one in four hoes was entirely wish fulfillment on my end#same with giving shadow angel fangs#i want angel fangs soo bad but i'll have to talk to my piercer about if my lips would work for them bc not everyone CAN get them :[#i've also been debating on getting my left labret pierced bc i do only have the right side done#i also kinda wanna get a daith ?? i know there's like. no actual SCIENCE behind it helping headaches#but they look cool and if there's even a chance of it my chronic headache ass would love that lol#I ALSO ALSO WANT INDUSTRIAL BARS#as for tattoos its so hard to decide on what to get first ??#i rlly wanna get some eeveeloution tattoos. like an espeon and a glaceon to represent lu and i maybe .. but i'd have to talk to him first#i also need some kind of KIU tattoo that game genuinely saved my life it was such a light for me when I had started feeling suicidal
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spontaneous magic manifestation was NOT mentioned in the parenting handbook 😬
I know this isn’t how magic in dc works, but the fact that Damian’s ancestry includes some pretty powerful magic users is… INTERESTING 🤔? Drabble under the cut!
I wanna preface that I'M NOT SAYIN' that Damian should/does have magic powers, but there’s still so much unexplored potential with Damian's character, and the thought that he has a dormant adeptness in magic is somewhat compelling to me. Most importantly it would FREAK! BRUCE! OUT!!!!! What is this, magic puberty 😭??
By DC laws, anyone has the ability to learn magic, but it is also possible to be an innate ability. The Al Ghuls are no strangers to the occult-- Ra's has had increasingly been portrayed as a magic user, and the recent establishment of his mother being a sorceress/witch?? Even Talia dabbled in a bit of magic, I think. There is a catch that their power is suggested to be due to Lazarus exposure, but for arguments sake let's say the Al Ghul lineage is inherently proficient in magic (and Lazarus exposure simply enhances it).
I can't recall "magic" being a part of Damian's training/upbringing (I'm still slowly catching-up on Damian comics so apologies if I miss any canon examples of magic use). Not sure why Talia wouldn't want her little "heir to an ancient assassin empire baby" to learn magic, but it would at least give reason to Damian not knowing about his magic potential, or lack of interest in it.
Through the power of pseudo storytelling, what if Damian's encounter with Mother Soul could have triggered a manifestation of magic that was once dormant; like a pressure cooker waiting to explode with energy when it hasn't been given a safe outlet.
I've yet to read a satisfying arc where Damian truly gets to contemplate his Al Ghul roots outside of "dad is good guy, mum is bad guy". Damian's initial character growth stems from him running away from, and renouncing his association with the League (i.e. "I'm nothing like you, mother and grandfather!").
The most recent thing I've read was Robin (2021), and whilst Damian is much more cordial with his mother, there's still an emotional distance and sense of distrust/resentment (for good reason, even if the context was some cartoonishly evil writing). But there is a silver-lining that they still appear to be fond of each other, in a melancholy kind of way.
Realizing he's "genetically" primed for magic would be especially confronting to Damian. There's no denying his Al Ghul blood, forcing him to confront a facet of himself he can no longer ignore or reject. A family that he likely has to approach for help/guidance.
Damian is put in a position of acknowledging this power could be used for good, to be stronger, to fight crime, balancing it with the implication that what he possesses could be rooted in dark magic (Lazarus enchantment).
If he decides to embrace it, would that be too much of an endorsement of the Al Ghul's dark occultism? Can he separate the two ideas? What if he can't control it? What if he accidentally hurts someone? What if has the ability to save someone where his other skills fall short?
Ideally, I'd love for this hypothetical story to lead into Damian exploring his Al Ghul heritage more intimately, historically, and spiritually (à la RSoB: Year of Redemption adventures). Another little coming-of-age self discovery journey.
I have my own little personal thoughts on what Damian decides to do with his magic powers, but I'd like to leave that open to interpretation... By the end of it I hope that he will at least find some forgiveness over resentment, and a balance between accepting that side of his family a little easier. It is finally a sense of inner peace :)
Any thoughts? Did I get any characterisation wrong? Let's talk over on my DC blog @arkhamochi! I'm currently trying to read all Damian-centric comics until I catch up with the current run. I'm hungry for discussion and analysis!!!!!!
#batman#batman and robin#damian wayne#bruce wayne#dc comics#P.S. drabble is kinda LONG so DO NOT read more unless you want the inconvenience of scrolling
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You want it?
It's yours my friend!
https://moctor.gumroad.com/l/smugjug
FINALLY
I did NOT mean for this to take so long! - I've had an incredibly busy year. Apparently pursuing a new career makes whole chunks of time just vanish >_>
Admittedly there's also the fact that I'm a forgetful perfectionist who feels immense shame when anyone sees my DISGUSTING topology, and my plans to make a full remesh/cleanup were constantly delayed... by shiny new fun ideas that don't require hours of tedious retopo and weight painting
But now I've kinda just accepted the fact that people aren't really gonna care about non-symmetrical geo or barely noticeable clipping... right?
And also you'll need to accept the fact that if you wanna use this for anything more complex than a discord sticker (or 3d print) it's gonna take a bit of work, but I know you'll do a great job because you're so epic!!1
I'd previously mentioned my worries about asset scrapers/resellers/AI trainers, and I was thinking of selling it for a couple quid as a deterrent, but that didn't feel right to me since I'd used someone else's sculpt as a reference. So I just decided to say fuck it and just share it in its current state before I get distracted or forget.
!! Absolutely no reselling or commercial use whatsoever okay? !!
(if you wanna put the model in your game or use it in a video or something like that it's probably fine, feel free to get in touch if you have any questions)
Oh yeah and thanks for all the lovely messages! And thanks for being patient :]
also PLEASE tag me if you make anything stoopid I really gotta see
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spent 10 minutes trying to write a witty thing about how I'm feeling unmotivated lately. but guess I'm too unmotivated to do that too lol
#also I ordered a ring for my boyfriend today#oh I mean THE ring#yep I've been agonizing about the design and the metal and whether he'd like it for months#i mean ok the idea of the metal and design took me literally 2 seconds but the figuring out if I should took months#like not in a way 'if i wanna marry him' no that thing is decided#but whether he'd be ok with the ring and stuff#cause he has more traditional ideas about that stuff and bleh#i mean i'm still gonna let him propose cause I know he'd want to#i'm just working on a sassy line back when he pops the question. revealing I have a ring for him tooooooo#but damn i've ordered a ring and i'm not even excited anymore#maybe cause who knows how long id have to keep the ring until he proposes#its killing me#tags on tumblr are a good place to vent lol#also good thing that noone from my offline life follows me here so they will never know#never thought i'd ever wanna marry someone#and yet here i am#ordering a ring#jeez one year ago id think i was nuts#but now im in therapy. i've progressed in my career so much. there's also a war in my country and the future isnt promised yet here i am
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